#BUT YES. VERY COOL TURN CAN'T WAIT 2 SEE WHERE IT GOES !!!

[starheirxero]

The conversation between Monty and Moon has me so dang Intrigued-

Old Moon is dead, and yet he is not. His memory is all but a corrupted file in the body of another. A part of him is still there, in a sort of vegetative state, dead yet alive, alive yet dead, never to come back, but still reachable.

This is such a cool concept!!

-Stardust

RIGHT???? THAT REVEAL ACTUALLY CAUGHT ME TOTALLY OFF GUARD IF I'M BEING HONEST BUT IM SO FASCINATED?????? LIKE OMS.

There's a certain vibe to it now that rings less like "New Moon is a walking grave for Old Moon" and more like "New Moon has been (unknowingly) keeping the last known piece of Old Moon alive simply by existing" and thats SUPER INTRIGUING????

I'm SUPER fascinated where they intend to go with this. I hope it crushes me emotionally in a way I never knew I could be emotionally crushed before <3

#asks #anon #stardust anon #also monty and moon solo interactions that aren't just business..... kinda forgot i missed those aoaughh #them cheering to staying alive was so real and made me weirdly emotional idk why HEHAAHGS #BUT YES. VERY COOL TURN CAN'T WAIT 2 SEE WHERE IT GOES !!! #sun and moon show #the sun and moon show #tsams #sams spoilers #tsams spoilers

[jade-len]

so today i tricked my very straight male friend into reading svsss.

okay look, i wasn't planning to at first and it's not like it was completely my fault. he wanted to read it!

i was showing him how badly they fucked up mu qingfang in the donghua by comparing it to the english novel design (he said that mu qingfang went from looking like a soft dilf to a predator registered on the epstein island list). and then, i showed him how different some of the other character designs were like gongyi xiao's ("he looks like he'd be a genshin character" -friend, to eng novel design) and luo binghe's ("lowkey, he kinda gives airbender vibes" -friend, to bunhe eng novel design)

so that was all i was gonna show him, nothing else. but after seeing them, he goes, "these designs actually look hella cool. what's the book called?"

now, do i:

A. tell him the name, eventually revealing that it's a danmei when he looks it up?

B. just straight up tell him that it's a danmei?

C: don't tell him the name just yet, spill the summary, get him interested, and tell him to not search anything up about it because there's heavy spoilers and it will reveal them the moment he types it up on the search bar

i go with C, obviously.

me: so, basically, some guy named shen yuan transmigrates into an incel harem male power fantasy novel where the protagonist, luo binghe, has hundreds of wives. thing is though, the guy pretty much took over the body of binghe's teacher he had when he was a teenager, who turns out to be a really scummy dude. and now he has to be nice to him so that the protagonist doesn't rip off his limbs and put him into a pickle pot in the future to suffer for eternity.

friend: that sounds hilarious and horrifying at the same time.

me: yes it is, and you should read it. it's like. my favorite novel at the moment. but don't search up anything about it because people spoil that shit. i'll let you borrow my novel

friend: nah don't worry, i'll just pirate it

friend: wait. does it have pictures?

me, my plan coming together: yeah, it has pictures. buuut, when you pirate it, it doesn't. trust me dude, i tried and was severely disappointed. plus, the physical copy is so much better

friend: fuck yeah ok thanks

me: hold on though. i'll text you later to see if my friend who's borrowing it rn is done reading it

he's hyped. he's excited. he craves a good book and a good transmigration interpretation. he's especially happy about the fact that it takes place in a chinese setting with cool powers and an actual good main character. "this sounds so good, god i wanna read it so bad."

i tell him that binghe is actually adorable, too. that it's pretty much found family! my friend then asks if shen yuan adopts him and becomes a father figure or something.

and i said "yes". you know, like a liar. (the father figure part probably isn't a lie though)

now i'm gonna give him the novel tomorrow! of course, i'm gonna cover the chapter 2 bunhe sexual awakening scene with washi tape and say that my baby cousin (sorry baby cousin, you would never <\3) scribbled all over that paragraph with her markers, and since i'm a neat book freak, i put washi tape and just wrote the scene! i don't know if that's really all too believable, but he didn't seem to care that much. just a simple "if my baby cousin did that to my book i would punt them into the sun"

i think what'll be more hilarious is the fact that you can't really tell that svsss is a BL. especially not volume 1. there's like, only a few lines indicating, but if you remove the baby binghe sexual awakening scene then you probably won't be able to know (...if you don't really read romance or anything. idk he's kinda dense anyways). so let's hope he gets attached and has a slow descent into the homo before i drop svsss vol 2 on him!

ok anyways i'll update you guys later with a reblog. maybe in about two or three days lol

(also don't worry, we already fuck around with each other on a daily basis like this. he's already tricked me into reading some manga i was unprepared for, and i thought that it'd be funny to mess around with him using svsss this time lol)

#greatest prank ive ever donee i think #manipulation 100 fr #absolute tomfoolery #am i a bad friend for this? perhaps. is it hilarious? definitely. #this is truly the most moment of all time #svsss #mxtx svsss #the scum villain's self saving system #luo binghe #luo bingmei #shen qingqiu #shen yuan

[koostarcandy]

hi can i pls req a jungkook fic based on when you’re ready by shawn mendes? thank u !!!

whole world - jk x reader

pairing: pining!jungkook x fem!oc (unnamed)

summary: jungkook hopes you know his intense feelings towards you. alternative? jungkook would wait 10 years if it means to be with you.

genre: fluff

wc: 680 words

a/n: shawn mendes has got some really good songs ㅠㅠ requests are open because I can't look at textbooks all day long 😃👍🏼uh jaykay is very pining here (idk how you say it English but it makes sense in my head okay) it's not as bad as you think it is but it did take me 2 days to write so🕳🏃🏽‍♀️ also, I left it open cause why not?

jungkook thinks you're like all the seasons, combined.

early spring, where the flowers are slowly blooming and the air is filled with the giddiness at the prospect of summer. you're eager to pick out tiny daisies to make flower crowns for the both of you, always on the lookout for cute animals to capture pinterest worthy pictures.

you're the soft sunshine brightening up his life, the relief of mid-day rain during the peak heat and he can only hope you know that he loves spending spring with you.

summer, filled with popsicles and frequent trips to the pool. there's tons of polaroids on jungkook's desk, left by you so he can put it in their designated albums. you're always dragging him to carnivals and fairs, summer nights a haze and memorable with you.

you're like the cool and chill nights, that brings relief after the sweltering heat. he hopes that, years down the lane, you're looking at these precious albums with him, old and wrinkly and happy.

when it comes to autumn, jungkook loves the fact that you go up and beyond to get "cuddly" clothes, getting matching ones to even pair up with his dear doberman, bam. you're always stomping the crunchy colourful leaves with him, silent content at the sound.

like the sudden gusts of wind which remind him that fall season is here, you're in the tight hands held and close proximity to ensure there's enough warmth for everybody. he hopes that, years down the lane, he's still holding your hand in his, enjoying the crisp air with you.

in brisk winter, jungkook knows you'll find a hundred reasons and more to make delectable hot chocolate, decorated with your favourite fluffy tiny marshmellows. you make it a point to see the first snow with him, turning it into an impromptu snowball fight.

like how children's eyes light up when they get their christmas presents, you're the sparkle that everyone looks for when it comes to the holidays, especially jungkook. he hopes that, when the time comes, you'll be passing down the sparkle, making the whole world a better place. just like how you do to his.

jimin is flabbergasted, speechless and most importantly, shocked at the audacity of his best friend, now drunk.

"jimin-ssi," a drunk jungkook wails, "what do i do?"

jungkook might not know it and he might not even care, but the stares garnered and projected to them, even though they're in a private booth of the bar, makes jimin think twice about his life choices.

it takes everything in him to not up and get out, frankly tired of how blind his jungkookie can be.

"you want her to stay with you, yes?" jimin asks slowly.

jungkook nods furiously, drunk sleepy eyes suddenly widening. "that goes without saying! of course, i want that!"

jungkook's precious hyung winces slightly at the rise of volume but he goes on anyway, "so why don't you just ask her out?"

the pining boy shakes his head so fast and quickly, jimin thinks it might fall off. "she's not interested in me like that, she never has been and I've seen it, hyungie." jungkook nods solemnly, flicking open the cap of soju and pouring himself a shot and downing it.

"but i'll wait for her. like i always do and i don't mind that at all."

jimin stares at him, mind reeling from the rant jungkook had gone on you being "all seasons combined" after hearing the song 'four seasons' play in the bar. the poor man massages his temples with one hand, the other fisting to meet jungkook's buff arm, softly punching him repeatedly.

"you blind, utter, foolish, dumbass!"

"i'm sure you're right but why?!"

jimin heaves the biggest sigh he's let out around jungkook and that's saying something. "you said that you're sure she's not interested in you. at all?"

jungkook mimics his hyung, sighing and grabbing the soju bottle, "jimin-ssi, how many times do I have to tell you? she isn't-"

"if she isn't, then why does she look at you like you're her whole world?"

pt time: @armys-dna ; @joondiary ; @soobhyun ; @shatzkrinslinzki ; @highly-functioning-mitochondria ; @taegisms ; @cherishoshi

#jungkook x reader #jungkook imagine #jungkook au #jungkook #jungkook drabble #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #bts x reader #bts imagines #chae chats #bts au #bts jungkook #bts drabble #bts fanfic #bts fluff #this was good #slowly getting me out of a writing slump #so its fun #thats why requests are back open #because i had my anatomy textbook for one day and im already fed up and my professor hates our class so we hate him #v v fun

[yubellia]

Jason Dean x (somewhat unwilling) fem y/n (Soulmate AU) Part 2

Yeah.... Hi! Here we are with part 2. If you haven't seen the first part, go and read it please. Now enjoy!

---------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N took J.D. and they left the forest again. The weather had changed a little with Y/N's mood. "So? You wanted to talk about this whole soulmate thing?" Jason tried to stay cool but after almost one year of wanting this meeting and things now going like this, it was not easy. "Yeah. You don't care about this at all, do you? Of us meeting soulmates?" Y/N thought for a moment. Of course she cared. she had been thinking about it for a while. She knew, that this reaction could hurt her soulmate. Even if Jason seemed annoyed more than anything else, she knew it was hitting him hard. "I do care. I am just more chill about it. Why should we wait our whole life for one person? Life goes on. Also, like i said, i saw how this soulmate thing can go wrong." They walked for a while. Y/N was leading him bach into the town and past the market. She wanted to see the fields. "I guess you are talking about you parents." Jason had a feeling that he knew where this was going.

"Yes. They went to the same school. But they were too different. One day my mother descided, that she was better off without him. Even if that meant, to be a single mother. They just did not fit together despite being soulmates."

His hand grabed hers tighter and she looked up at him. "So that is why you won't even give this a chance? You are scared." "No i am not. i am realistic." Jason stoped her, now that they had reached the fields. "I have been there you know? Being scared of this. When mom was alive, she told me about how great soulmates are but than, she walked into a building my dad was about to blow up. It is his job to take down buildings. Only after that, i realised that she was unhappy. I know where you come from. It is perfect. We are pretty much the same!"

He smiles now and looks at her. Having a weird glint in his eyes. It seems like they know each others pain on some level. However, something about this felt like she was about to make a mistake. "And? Even if we are very much the same. How is this suposed to work? We still live too far away from each other. Today is just an exception you know?" He grabs er arm. pretty roughly too as she tried to leave again. "No it isn't. It can't be Darling." Y/N tries to get her arm back but he isn't letting go. "No matter what you say, the universe is screaming at us to meet and be together. You are scared? Fine! But i won't let this go." He grabed her other arm too and Y/N didn't like his smirk or that possessive look in his eyes. However, she did not have to say anything because suddenly there was a sound. I sounded like a music box and Y/N looked reliefed. J.D on the other hand looked mad as y/n woke up and left him there.

Y/N sat up quickly and grabed her phone to turn it off. It seems like she made some noises because her parents came in. "Are you ok dear? Bad dream." Her mother sat beside her while her stepdad stayed by the door. Even their dog came in. "Mom.... i met them..." Her mom had a confused look at first, before she realised what happened. "Oh dear.... it did not go well? You don't like them?" Y/N looked down into her lap. "I don't want this. He is from america it seems and he is..... determined to make this work. Rather i like it or not. Hey dad? Why are you home so early today?" Her dad has a hotel. He talked about how he wanted to expand or do something new, so it was strange that he was not busy for once. Her dad went pale while she talked. "Well..... you see. I have to tell you guys sometging...... We are moving." Y/N looked shocked but her mom looked calm. SHe must have known. Of course. Y/N was the last one to know. Like always. "We move to where?" Her dad was silent and looked away. "America."

Well shit....

-------------------------------------------------------------

Alright! Part two is done! I hope you liked it. I Also hope that you find this. See you in the next part.

#jason dean x reader #jd x reader #heathers soulmate au #heathers x reader

[one-strugling-bean]

OFMD Random Commentary (Ep 8)

A friend, huh? Alright let's see where this goes

I'm sensing we're going to be dealing with jealousy in this episode

Brekkie!!!

I wanna give Olu a hug... Poor guy doesn't enjoy being the only sensible person aboard

Buttons truly is one of the good ones

Ngl, I wouldn't enjoy hearing about homicide over brekkie either

Whippies!!

Ahh, they look so happy to have a room for themselves! I'm so happy for them!

Hmmmmm, I'd love it if Jack didn't turn on Stede... But I'm starting to suspect it

Third time this year?? How do your crews keep mutining? What do you do to them??

"We were gonna mutiny on Stede." "Yeah, probably will again someday!" They're so earnest saying these things, it makes it so funny

Yardies!!!

"That was cool." "Yes, it was." Yes it very much was omg

Yeahhhh they're both kind of fighting the other, got it

Hmmm I kind of get both Ed and Stede in this issue. But Stede is getting disrespected...

Ahh, it makes me so happy to see Jackie and Jim just talk and bond over life, I love to see it

I just had a wild idea. Could Jack be one of the Gallos?

Karl..... no......

Karl's death is actually making me get emotional, what the hell

And now Ed's leaving too....? Oh, now I'm sad...

The two heartbroken lovebirds in each other's company

Yessss, Lucius, show these two who's boss!

Buttons deserves the world

"Neither of us will like you less or more than we did before." They're all children of divorce now

Of course, he would come back!

Livy, the true MVP

Wow, just like that, they're invaded

There are 2 episodes left. That's plenty of time for everything to go pear-shaped.

Can't wait to see what happens next~~

#ofmd #ofmd random commentary #our flag means death #stede bonnet #edward blackbeard #gentlebeard #blackbonnet

[korruptbrekker]

Anaroceit Week Day 2: Truth

[Previous] — Day 2 — [Next] — [Masterpost] — [AO3]

Rated T — Content Warnings: Minor Angst

Word Count: 691

@anaroceitweek

Roman has a misunderstanding with Virgil and Janus helps to clear things up.

One of the things Roman learned after he started spending more time around Janus and Virgil was that being in the presence of the personification of Deceit meant a lot of lies.

But, more importantly, it meant finding truth in unexpected places.

Virgil had warned him early on that Janus's mere presence was enough to coax even the most truthful into lying, and Roman had taken that into account and brushed off the little whispers in the back of his mind when he was around his serpent sweetheart.

But actually seeing the effects was something Roman could have never prepared for. Virgil and Janus were cuddling together on the common room couch, all the other Sides off on their own various adventures. Patton and Logan were having a chat with Thomas, and Remus was off frolicking in the Daydreamscape.

Roman, excited to watch a movie with his not-yet-boyfriends, walked into the room only to see them pressed against each other, Virgil exhausted and slumped against Janus's side, knuckles white where they gripped Janus's capelet.

Janus, in this moment the more observant of the two, smiled at Roman before turning to Virgil.

“Roman's here, spiderling,” he muttered, a hand rubbing circles into his boyfriend's back, “would you like him to stay?”

“You really think I'd let him stick around?” Virgil's voice was exhausted and dulled, but the words still cut effortlessly through Roman's chest.

The air stood still, and Roman swore he heard something cracked. And so, naturally, he did what he always did when someone hurt him. He hurt them back.

“Well I'm sorry that you can't handle me. It's all your loss, really.” He forced, willing the tears building in his eyes not to fall. “Good riddance, I don't need a crybaby for a boyfriend anyways.” He turned on his heel to run, but a hand caught his shoulder.

“Roman, wait.” Janus commanded, calm and cool as ever.

“What, you too snake?” He sneered. “Want to get one last hit in before a right and proper K.O.?” He felt the extra hand on his shoulder flinch.

“Remember what Vee told you about me? About being Deceit?” Janus's voice shook and Roman winced.

“That you make people lie?”

“Not exactly.” The hand slipped from his shoulder. “Take a seat my love.” Roman didn't turn around. “Please, just listen.” With a breath Roman nodded and allowed Janus to guide him onto the couch on Janus's other side.

“I'm Deception. And as you know, for myself lying and telling the truth is a matter of control.” Roman nodded and Janus continued. “It's the same for others as well. Don't you notice how you're more inclined to lie around me?”

Roman nodded again, stomach sinking when he realized where this was going.

“Well, sometimes, when you're tired,” he nudged Virgil gently and the lump hummed, “that control goes away. And so you lie. Right, Virge?”

“Not a bit.” He mumbled with a nod.

“Precisely.” Janus pat his shoulder with a gentle. “Do you understand a little more, Roman? I asked Virgil if he wanted you to stay, and seeing as it was a no, it meant yes.” Roman's mouth twisted. The tears returned for an entirely new reason.

“Speak what's on your mind, dear.” Janus coaxed.

“I'm so sorry, shadowling. I didn't realize—”

“I'll never forgive you.” Virgil interrupted. “I'm fine, but, well, it's not like I understand.”

“That's confusing.” Roman admitted, after a long pause. “But I think I get it, and I'm so very, very sorry. To both of you.”

Janus hummed. “Yes it is confusing, but you'll pick up on it soon enough. And we'll be sure to have a proper conversation when we're all right of mind.” He tapped the side of Virgil's head gently.

Virgil nodded, making grabby hands at Roman. “Now go away you big lump.”

Roman awkwardly laughed, still still and wracking with guilt, but he settled next to Virgil anyway and got a kiss on the cheek and a proper squeeze in confirmation that Virgil still loved him.

It would take a moment, and a lot of conversations, but maybe Roman could get used to this.

#sanders sides #fanfiction #fanfic #sanders sides fanfic #roman sanders #ts roman #janus sanders #ts janus #virgil sanders #ts virgil #anaroceit #anaroceitweek2022 #kbwrites

[daylightaftertherain]

SEA, bestie hi

we are 12 days away from Speak Now (TV) (which i am UNSPEAKABLY excited for as it's always been at least in my top 2 fave albums) and in honor of that

i have some young royals x taylor swift thoughts.

today's rambly message is about... HAUNTED

i genuinely never realized how wilmon-coded it was until i applied it to simon during the Valentine's Ball so... let's get into it!

You and I walk a fragile line I have known it all this time But I never thought I'd live to see it break

(even though they didn't want it to be, their entire relationship has always been shaky because of outside pressures. the wille back and forth, the sex-tape, all of season 2 leading up to ep 4 etc, however if it was up to both of them, they would want it to be simple, and they didn't actually want it to end)

Oh, I'm holding my breath Won't lose you again Something's made your eyes go cold

(thinking about Simon panicking over the idea of losing Wille after trying to push him away the entire season! like... yes he wanted space, but he also didn't. and he's not used to wille looking at him and talking to him like he's any other person. thinking about simon's pov of the wille/marcus/simon interaction and how off-guard simon is over the whole thing)

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this I thought I had you figured out Something's gone terribly wrong You're all I wanted Come on, come on, don't leave me like this I thought I had you figured out Can't breathe whenever you're gone Can't turn back now, I'm haunted

(just this whole chorus does such a good job of highlighting Simon's panic during this scene, how, even though he thought he wanted this space, now he can barely breathe without the comfort that wille will still be there for him)

Stood there and watched you walk away From everything we had But I still mean every word I said to you He will try to take away my pain And he just might make me smile But the whole time I'm wishing he was you instead

(again, most of this i can relate entirely to ep 4 of s2. like simon watching as wille leaves while still knowing he loves him, thinking he's losing him. the second part is kinda self explanatory but like... marcus as a whole was obviously such a terrible attempt at getting over wille and the entire time he was with marcus he was thinking of wille)

like..... when i had this haunted realization i knew i had to share it with you, and it's been a while since i've sent you an unhinged taylor x wilmon analysis

n e ways... thoughts??? give me all of them

genuinely cannot wait for SN (TV) and you know you'll be getting all my thoughts

-miels 💜✨

miels I'm so sorry I got to this late asbhjgfjd I saw this ask and thought I was going to answer it later but this is like several days off rip 💀💀

anyway into the thoughts!! haunted is SUCH a good song choice omg

the intro alone, I agree with all your thoughts and also "I never thought I'd live to see it break" reminds me of that one line in wille's speech in s1ep4 where he says how it should've been him and not erik standing there, and then we see him breaking it off with simon the very next scene like oh my godd

and "something's made your eyes go cold" and how cool toned s2 was when they were apart and trying to have space but not lose each other!!

and YES the chorus and how big and swelling it is like simon's panic every time wille blindsides him, especially with "I thought I had you figured out" which reminds me so much of him thinking they were going to be in it together before the denial ;-;

HOUGH THE SECOND VERSE I DIDN'T MAKE THE CONNECTION TO S2 SIMON UNTIL NOW BUT IT IS PERFECT????? simon watched wille walk away so many times AND the last two lines are basically the marcus situation boiled down to that

and then the bridge which is short but the way it goes from "I know you're not gone" to "you can't be gone" like simon's emotions after finding out about the denial and realizing he doesn't know if he can trust wille :')

those are all my thoughts for now, I might send you a story of us ask actualy bc I'm listening to it and the lyrics are s2 coded as well

-💛✨

#ask #allthefakepeople #young royals #wilmon #haunted

[zurako0]

Part 1:

It's a normal Thursday morning, Ellie wakes up with only 5 hours of sleep, lately she jumps from one club to another, from one party to another.

Her break up affected her a lot, when she left her heartbroken phase she became a whole new person ready to meet the love of her life, meet new people in general, live life the way she wanted it.

It was a sudden change but she never felt more free and happy. She is able to see her friends more often and she doesn't have a stupid man slowing her down. Making her life miserable, abusing her and making her be at the lowest part of her life.

Today Ellie is going to a party, she has doubts about it since the host is literally a dealer with the worst fame possible, but you know what they say right? You only live once so live your fullest. At least that's what Ellie tells herself to feel better. Even though the party is going to be a more chill and relaxed gathering of people there will still be lot's of drugs and alcohol, but her friends convinced her to go, that she will have nothing to worry about and she will be perfectly fine. What's the issue with being amongst high and drunk people right? Oh well...

~~~~~~~~~~

It's currently 9pm and the party starts at 1am, Ellie gets in the shower, she loves to take hot boiling showers, she finds them very relaxing she loves feeling the warm water hitting her skin. After she finished her shower she dried herself up and laid down to bed waiting news from her friends on what they are going to wear for today's event.

She is thinking of wearing a short black dress, plain and simple with some black high heels and some jewelery. She is going to straighten her hair, that's what she always does, back when she had long beautiful hair she would often do some beach waves and she looked absolutely stunning, just like a princess, now her hair is still gorgeous but it's short, she doesn't have much options on how to style them so she just let's them be straight.

She opens her closet and the black dress is nowhere to be found, she runs downstairs and asks her mother if she has any idea on where it could have been. "Mom? Mom?" She shouts while getting down the stairs, "Yes my darling what is it?" Her mother answers her call, "Have you seen my short black dress? I can't find it anywhere" she asks her mother, "It's right here baby I just finished ironing it be caref-" "AOUCH!!" The dress was burning hot and it caught Ellie by surprise,"I tried to warn you.. hahah" her mother says chuckling "great joke mom I almost burned myself but whatever will let it cool for a while, thank god you didn't burn it with that temperature"

Ellie goes back upstairs to chill with her cat and listen to some music, Chase Atlantic released a new album just 2 weeks ago and she can't stop listening to it. Time passes as she is stroking her beautiful cat which she deeply loves and its time to start getting ready.

She starts by putting on her clothes, that dress fits perfectly on her body and the high heels make her look very classy, you know.. if only the dress wasn't so short of course.

Later on she proceeds to do her make up, Ellie studies the art of make up and aesthetics, so she knows how to do make up and she damn good in doing it aswell, today she wants to do a simple make up whereas the other days she would do a full glam look with gorgeous siren eyes. Today she will put on just the basics, foundation some contour and blush and of course a long winged eye liner, Ellie's all time favourite.

After she finishes her make up she sends a message to her friends that she is ready to go and they should come pick her up whenever they ready.

Her friends arrive half an hour later, they pick her up, Jess is driving which means she is the one that is going to be sober and take care of the rest of the friend group.

Ellie, Jess, Marry and Jane have been together since 3rd grade and they have been inseparable, they've been through all sorts of things for so many years since all of them turned 20 this year, Ellie is an aquarius, Jess a capricorn, Marry an aries and jane a scorpio, they have their ups and downs but they always go through everything together.

~~~~~~~~~~

The 4 girls arrive at the party around 1:30am, a lot of people have gathered already but no one interesting caught Ellie's attention, the moment she turns around she can't believe who her eyes have seen, it was james her ex boyfriend. Ellie stumbles on her feet catching Jess' attention, the moment Jess realises what is going on she grabs Ellie to pull her aside away from him but her efforts were in vain.. James had already approached them.

Ellie is on the edge of a mental breakdown she can't stand the sight of him, she can't bear being with him for even a split second, she despises him for everything he has done to her, he is a monster.

"Hello there, long time no see Ellie." James says with a smirk on his face, it angers Ellie so much how he is so cool about their meeting after so long, how he can look at her in the eyes like nothing has happened. "Get away from her right now or else-" Jess says full of anger, she can barely hold herself back,

"Or else what redhair?" James knew very well that the nicknames he gives Jess annoy her and is trying to make things worse.

Ellie is too stunned to say or do anything she just gets up and leaves this room, Jess follows and quickly the rest of the girls notice them and follow up.

"What happened is everything okay? why do you look like you've seen a ghost?" Marry asks Ellie but Ellie is still shocked by his appearance. "That bastard James dared to show up on us how dare he" Jess says still pretty much angry.

A few minutes pass and the girl calm down Ellie begins to come back to herself "im fine everything is fine i will just ignore him, i said i dont care about him anymore remember?" Ellie says and puts a broken smile on her face.

2 hours into the party the girls are having fun and James is nowhere to be found Ellie thought to herself that she finally got rid of him and can relax now...

But to her surprise James shows up from behind of her and pulls her aside without her friends noticing anything, "please give me one more chance to explain myself, i just wanna talk baby" James says with a soft smile on his face, "dont call me your fucking baby, get away from me" Ellie says with tears filling her eyes, "please just come with me for a second i want to apologise properly, all this time we were separated i couldn't stop thinking about you, how much of an asshole i was to, please just come with me for a walk.."

Ellie takes a step back wondering if she should trust him or not, she really wanted that apology..

Ellie follows James out of the house as they're walking James is apologising and explaining his actions, how sorry he is and how much he is hurting for what he has done, how much he wants to start over be with her and treat her the way she deserves to be treated.. But all these are nothing but lies.

~~~~~~~~~~

Ellie and James have come close to the woods they walked pretty far away Ellie is starting to get a weird gut feeling that she must run away immediately as James has stop talking.

He grabs her wrist and puts his hand over her mouth as he tries to drag her more into the woods, Ellie is trying to fight her way out of this situation but James is bigger and stronger, Ellie regrets the moment she agreed to go with him, she can't do anything to free herself from his grab, she starts kicking and hitting him but all this was in vain.. this was it, this was the end for her he was going to assault her again and again like he used to, there is no way out so Ellie gives up.

He lets go of her while they are deeper inside the woods Ellie starts running and screaming for help but what sane person would be in the woods specially this time?

James loved to hunt his victim that's what he always did, so he started running after her screaming and laughing at her, Ellie's vision was blury since tears were running down her face and this whole place was dark only with the light of the moon shining upon them.

Suddenly the footsteps stop Ellie can't hear James running after her, she thought she finally run away but this was just the beginning of his hide and seek twisted game.

~~~~~~~~~~

Time passes and Ellie is wondering alone in the woods the tears cant stop running down her cheeks and James is nowhere to be found.

The agony and fear are tiring her appart she can't help but sob and wimper, cry and scream for somebody to come and rescue her from this madness.

As she is running she stumbles on a branch of a tree and she falls down and scratches her knee, it hurts which makes her limp a little but she doesn't give up, she still going on until she finds help.

A few minutes pass Ellie still wondering around the woods and out of a sudden she hears a noise.. branches snapping, it gets closer, RUN she tells herself, she tries to run as fast as she can to run away from there, James catches up he throws her to the ground and starts choking her, Ellie grabs a big rock and hits him in the head she manages to run away, for now.

James is dizzy but he is still following her, he wont let her go that easily. "fucking bitch im gonna kill you" he screams at Ellie and running after her until a loud thud sounds, Ellie hears voices in the distance finally somebody came for help, she starts yelling and screaming for help.

She walks back to the direction of where James was only to witness a tall man getting up from the ground where he was literally beating up James.

He is tall very handsome with medium length straight black hair his blue eyes are shining like fireflies in the moon light amongst the dark of the night, he is wearing an all black fitted suit showing of his perfectly muscular body, his hair got messy in the fight and his fists full of blood.

The mood suddenly changes and Ellie caught herself staring at this handsome man that came to her resque.. a voice brings her back to the scenery "Hello? are you okay? Hello?" The mysterious man calls for her but she is dozed off, so many things to process at once. "Yes.. im okay.." Ellie realised that she is alone with another man at the woods a sense of fear comes across her and she backs off from the man "Im not going to hurt you, i know the way out of the woods" the man tells her with a reassuring look on his face, after all he is the one that saved her.

Ellie decides to go with him than keep getting lost in the woods, her friends afterall are probably looking for her.

Ellie cannot believe herself that she got caught up in one of James traps again, she cannot forgive herself for believing his act, but now all she cares about is to get out of the woods go to home safely.

"Excuse me sir, i forgot to thank you.. I- thank you for saving me from him he is an ex of mine.. if you didnt co-" Ellie says but she is interrupted " Alex my name is Alex and no worries, i can't let a woman alone in the woods with such dangerous man" Alex says giving a soft smile back at Ellie, she is very flattered. "By the way, whats your name?" Alex asks "My name is Ellie, nice to meet you Alex". They both exchanged smiles.

After minutes of walking they arrive at the house the party was going on, only to find the police outside, Alex immediately pulls Ellie back and hide "Why did you pull me aside its just the police" Ellie asks "shh they might spot us, keep quiet".

Ellie soon notices that the house is empty with only a few people in which means her friends had already left, how was she supposed to go home now? Her house is very far away for her to walk in the middle of the night. An idea comes up to her mind.

"Alex." Ellie says with a serious tone, "what is it?" Alex asks her with a query look, "would you.. mind take me home? i will pay you i promise" Alex chuckles "that's it? you scared me for a second, of course i will take you home".

They get away from the police officers and finally get to Alex's car, they both get in and in that moment Ellie realised she had left her stuff to Jess to look after them.

~~~~~~~~~~

Time passes and Alex and Ellie finally arrive in her house. "Alex, what do i owe you?" Ellie asks since she offered to pay, "Nothing. Just this" Alex leans in and gives Ellie i kiss on the cheek, Ellie is too stunned to say anything, her face is all fluttered and red she didn't expect Alex to do such thing "Good bye now Ellie, here's my number if you get in trouble call me, and something else never tell anyone about what happened".

Alex gives her a wing and leaves immediately, Ellie is still shocked about everything that happened so she doesn't give it much thought she went to sleep thinking she will deal about it tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hello everyone!♡

Hope you liked my first chapter feel free to leave comments i will be active!!

#books #dark academia #mafia au #bookworm #romance #love story #smut

[terrisartwork]

how 2 reveal that you're transgender

so you walk up to someone and you're like "hey, i'm transgender. i want to be a girl and i always felt this way and the repression of such a thing is a massive source of anxiety to me." and the other person is like "cool, i'll support you with that. in fact, i'll help you be able to attain the changes that you want to make you feel more like yourself." everything goes okay, all that anxiety, whoof, gone.

[no wait, turns out that the world isn't like that, uh.]

now it turns out that if you reveal this to someone then they're like "a-wahhhhhh!" like that one guy out of jaws (1975), and then some people are like "wait, how do we explain this. hang on. this confronts my views of gender so much, actually. wah?" so then it turns out that you're now a part of a satanic conspiracy theory or something, or where it turns out, turns out that you're transness has so many other causes other than just it being a thing. what is transgender really? then you listen to a bunch of perversely sympathetic statements by people who have now declared themselves experts on transness!

the person is like "i'm okay with my boys playing with dolls as long as they're boys but then this person comes in, didn't even play with dolls that much as a child, and now they're like "oh i want to transform into a girl, i realised that this was a massive source of anxiety." nonsense!" and now you have to go through trials to really prove it. i mean it's self-evident to you but now you have to prove it. turns out that you were not transgender this entire time but that... you're something else, what could that be? so now this doctor is all like "hmm, yes. this juxtaposition that i will become obsessed with regarding transgender women. i think this entire time i should call them a guy. hmm, yes." and yeah, you know.

doctor pulls out a chart condescendingly explaining basic sex ed to you. "now." the doctor says. "men produce sperm and women get pregnant. this is how our society is structured. here, you should take this book. it will really help you. it's called jordan peterson's 12 rules of life and it argues that society naturally produces these structures in society, and now you're going against it through post-modernism. yes. i mean, why would anyone want to become a woman. my wife is a woman and she is sooooo unhappy with me." people just don't understand the basics, the reductive! i mean why?

okay, now, turns out your whole experiences are pseudoscientific according to this doctor, but if you're a good girl, maybe he will see you along your way into becoming transgender yourself. shit, uh, actually, you need to be able to cater towards whatever anxieties come up. this is a very pressing matter at hand. what if there was a transgender woman nurse for instance? have you ever thought about that. have you ever thought about THEIR agency. nevermind that i'm badly violating yours. that's just a price to pay if you want to get what you want. after all, i don't value these so-called 'trans-activists' i value these folk that are like "oh baby, i love your imposition and i can take it and secretly i don't actually hate you for the amount of bs that i put you through." if someone wants something then... [i'm such a nice person] turns out that they should give me something back in exchange for that. that's just how i roll. after all i'm generous.

[after spending months/years on waiting lists.]

off, turns out that we can't give you these hormones that you wanted. i know it's like uh kind of just menopause medication but uh.... it's complicated. now i am no doubt sympathetic to your plight and i admire your bravery, your courage, but you need to understand that i can't just help you with something that's clear and self-evident to you.

[you walk back home quiet/dejected]

now you are just scrolling through the internet and every single trans story is a sensationalistic gossip piece. what if there was a transgender barista at starbucks? george orwell was right!!! it's now everywhere. turns out that you're like literally the only trans person that certain people know and uh, we can't have people who experience messy feelings of that nature. see, i love self-actualised transgender people and nobody ever is allowed to feel insecure on my watch, or allowed to be frustrated at how society imposes on people.

we'll just make you so terrified to actually exist, and then every single day will just be a constant battle not only with your brain but about speculative paranoia over how shitty people can be. like what if you purchased a dr. pepper from a small shop up on the hill? what then? how can society cope with someone who decided that they wanted to become a girl? what then? see, we're not actually going to confront ourselves and we're just going to allow all this speculative bs to fill in the inexplicable and then uh... okay, why am i no longer in good company with this person anymore? explain that! must be the ideologies at work!

[you then meet a girl who is like "awwwww, that's so cute and sweet. you can be whatever you want to be." and you just feel so warm inside like oh my god, finally someone (more or less) gets it. i dunno, i'll take it, lol. but i wish it was just more like this, goddamnit.]

Remember folks, if anyone gives you shit for being transgender and sees it fundamentally as a bad thing, it helps if you're totally incredulous towards what they have to say. It should be a beautiful thing to reveal but some folks will not take it and will just turn it around themselves, treating it as inexplicable whenever they face consequences from it. Just remember not to put any value in what these people have to say!

[easier said than done, shit, like all trans stuff, lol.]

(a thorny depiction of trans experiences! what? how could it be?)

legit flinching with this fear of alienating people with every word that i say about this. you made me that way!

#trans #vent #transgender

[crazycrackersworld]

I remember this week 5 years ago. Has very excited I was very nervous, it seemed to just stretch on way longer than a week. In hindsight I probably shouldn't have got that excited, in hindsight....I don't know.

Life has many twists and turns, very rarely does a road you walk actually take you where you think it's going to take you. I surely never thought any road that I walked would take me to this freaking desert, where yes a lot of good things have happened but it's not home. Home is Wisconsin and I miss all the people and places that make it so.

Maybe someday I will get to go back to stay, maybe not. Maybe someday certain people will realize they actually want me in their life, but I'm guessing that that'll be after I'm gone from this world and they will have waited too late. Let's face it I am not the only person stupid enough to wait until it's too late, and we all know that I did that with my dad.

My kids probably aren't going to change their mind, I don't know why they would. I've stopped hoping that they will stop believing that it's possible, others can hope and believe for me. Me I'm becoming more and more of a realist as a time goes on and I just don't see it happening.

As for anyone else, well they'll probably wait until it's too late as well. Probably be, I don't know. I did spend the last 2 and a half years thinking I had something amazingly special and that eventually would have it again but it takes two and let's face it the other half 9f that special doesn't want that. The other half will probably be back with the same old same old of the last two and a half years, cuz let's face it going back to that within two or three weeks as seriously been just the pattern. And there's nothing I can do to change that.

The truth of the matter is I am almost 50, and I am tired I am just so tired of everything. And I have tried so many different things to become not tired and I just I can't can't find anything. I mean there are things that make me feel content I mean I have my go-to video games and my go-to TV shows and I've read a few new books and learning interesting things about my career is cool. But none of those things have made me any less tired or made me feel any less alone more importantly any less stupid.

Because let's face it that's really what this boils down to is stupidity. Cuz only a stupid person would think that they could get back some of these people and relationships that they've lost only a stupid person would think that. And as much as I like to think I'm not stupid the last 3 or 4 years have definitely proven different.

#i'm tired #so tired

[chestertophat]

Team 7 + Gaara with a intimidating but soft crush

Ok so this is obviously what it says it is, but I believe kakashi is part of team 7 and you all can't stop me. He's also one of my favorite characters but Gaara is definitely in the top three.

---------------------------------------

Kakashi

Your appearance didn't even phase him, because of his sharingan he can tell that you're nowhere near as intimidating as you may seem so when you approached him with your overall soft aura and your bright smile he wasn't even surprised.

What was the surprise was how hard he fell for you, he can predict a lot of things but that was not one of them.

If anyone is scared of you he'll force them to interact with you, problem solved now you have a new friend. :)

I'm not sure whether or not he'd be the first to confess, but he'd probably be scared to because of how many close friends he's lost in his lifetime.

But I can say when he does confess it would be short and sweet! And his reaction to your confession would be a really soft smile and a blush across cheeks. And of course a small "me too" or "I feel the same way".

Naruto

I think that when he first saw you he was a bit intimidated by you but also thought you looked very strong and very cool.

When he talks to you for the first time he just gets confused because 1, at the time he was crushing on Sakura and than the universe forcefully shoved you into his life and 2, you're a hell of a lot more soft and kinder than you look and he finds that cute wAiT wUt-

Good job my friend, you've broke him because of your cuteness you cutie. Just give him a moment he'll be fine (and he'll be a huge SIMP-)

He'll still think you're strong and if you complement him he'll take them happily with a small (huge) blush, and please don't mention it he'll just get even more embarrassed.

He likes you more than ramen, and in case you didn't know, THAT'S A LOT.

His confession will be at the romen shop. When he asks if you consider it a date and you say something like 'it can be if you want it to be' he would nervously say yes.

If you end up confessing to him first, out of nowhere, rather bluntly, he'll die from flusteredness :D

Sakura (I don't like her a lot so just bear with me here)

She isn't really intimidated by you like Naruto would be, and she doesn't really pay you that much mind either so-

But when she does interact with you for the first time, she'll think you're so adorable like look at you oh my goodness-

And then she realizes, she likes you A HOLE LOT MORE than Sasuke! She's kinda shocked by it but goes along with it because she finds you so cute!!

She's so nice to you but then 5 seconds later you find her yelling at Naruto over doing something stupid (Sakura why you gotta be mean to him like that though?? T-T)

Naruto gets so jealous of you, but you disided to help Hinata because you felt a bit bad for him (spoiler your efforts work in the end, also I don't ship Naruto and Hinata I'm just going with the cannon even though I really don't want to :D)

She ends up confessing because of the encouragement she got from her friends. When you say something along the lines of 'i feel the same' her face turns into a tomato, she gets the biggest blush you've seen her with, not like her crush wasn't obvious though (I'm so sorry to the people that absolutely love her I feel like I've done her dirty)

Sasuke (I have no idea where to even start with him :'D, dame you writer's block)

He didn't care about you at all when he first saw you, so it's definitely not love at first site

I'd say you were the one who interacted with him first, I really don't see him just going up to you for no reason. I will say this though, your softness ABSOLUTELY SMITES HIS HEART

He really wasn't expecting you to be so soft and cute, he's just standing there listening to you, enjoying the feeling of caring for someone romanticly for the first time

He's so embarrassed if you mention his blushing, or even worse, someone else dose.

His confession is very well planed out, but still pretty simple. He's got a full script of how he's going to confess to you and by the time he's ready to tell you how he feels he can say it word for word, he's just so nervous about it bit his pride would never let him willingly idmit it

Gaara (chunin exams, with Gaara it really, REALLY depends on which version we are talking about when you consider how much change he went through, so I'll just talk about chunin exams Gaara first :) )

He wouldn't notice you that much first, he'll he would barely spare you a second glance. But after he talks to you the first time? Oh boy...

He doesn't understand why he's feeling the way he dose, he's supposed to love himself and only himself, so why is he feeling this way for you...?

He's conflicted, he craves time with you and can't stand the thought of hurting you, but he's also in the mindset that his life's purpose is to kill every last person in the world, could he...? No, he can't love you... could he...?

Temari and kankuro notices he's severely conflicted about something and have talked about it before and suspect that you might be the cause of his change in behavior, but they never really find out why he constantly avoids you until much later.

He just has a lot of mental problems (that do eventually end up getting sorted out somewhere at the end of Naruto) But he's never going to confess to you until he gets himself into a healthy mindset.

Ok now after he gets out of that DAME MINDSET-

Now, if you've known him since before the chunin exams he's going to explain how he feels about you in hopes that you feel the same. Also, this would be the first time you see him expressing how he feels about almost anything.

If he were to meet you after he gets out of the unhealthy mindset, the way you look wouldn't really bother him at all. And when he talks to you he just thinks 'wow, they're cute...' and instantly wants to stay by your side.

He figures out how he feels about you pretty quickly but chooses to hold off on telling you because he doesn't want to jump into things to quickly.

He wants to know what your favorite food is, your hobbies and pass times, your favorite color, you know, all the simple stuff.

Once he gets all this and still adores you, his confession will happen a bit after he became the kazekage. The confession will be short and sweet.

He'll be so happy when you expect his confession, he'll even blush!!

------------------------------------------------------

Hay I'm so sorry this took so long I was just busy with starting school again and have some stuff to do that I kept putting off, but this felt like a nice break from all that! I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I did! Good night/day/afternoon/morning :3

Also I was actually considering putting Gaara's part in a hole other post but I disided against it

#kakashi x reader #kakashi hakate #naruto x reader #naruto uzumaki #Kakashi #naruto #sakura #sakura x reader #sakura haruno #sasuke #sasuke uchiha #sasuke x reader #gaara x reader #gaara #naruto fanfiction #fanfiction

[kiseiakhun]

halkyle. ALL the numbers

*cracks knuckles*

Dating Headcanon

Hal talks himself into and then out of dating Kyle like twenty times, meanwhile Kyle's just like hrnnnnn booty. Hal's having this whole Moment and making leaps and bounds in his Journey Of Self Discovery and Kyle is checking out his tits. It takes so much time and effort for Hal to get to the point where he can acknowledge that 1. he wants Kyle, 2. it's okay to want Kyle, 3. he is good enough to want Kyle, and Kyle is just like 🥺 daddy spank me.

Dinner Headcanon

The only time they remember to eat is when Guy forces them to. Kyle is a lantern wifi router and never runs out of charge and he just forgets to eat or sleep (I know that's been retconned and I don't care, shut up, he is a sentient lantern battery). Hal doesn't forget. He makes the active choice to live off of his ring energy. At one point Kyle knew how to make, like, grilled cheese, but at this point I don't think he remembers how to use a stove. Hal knows how to make basic meals but he never does unless he's trying to impress someone. Yes Kyle is impressed by Hal's kraft dinner mac and cheese. They deserve each other.

Arguments Headcanon

When they argue it's always as a proxy for some other issue. Kyle is too easygoing and prefers to ignore problems. Hal... doesn't like to acknowledge them, but he can't stop himself. He's hypervigilant and always waiting for the other shoe to drop and ready to bolt at a moment's notice. Things build up between them and then they explode in a dumb argument about doing the dishes or Kyle leaving his socks all over the place. Fights between them are bad. They're both very prideful and stubborn. Every time a small disagreement happens Hal is like, this is it, we are done, and starts packing his bags while Kyle goes to have sad breakup sex with Guy/John/Wally/Roy/Bruce one time and they never mention it again. And then two days later Kyle finds Hal in whichever space watering hole he's hiding at and apologizes and tries to talk it out but just ends up barfing his feelings all over Hal while Hal's standing there like 🧍‍♂️

And they both get overwhelmed by the emotional intensity and fuck for four days straight and then try to do better by each other. It's an ongoing process.

Playful/Silly Headcanon

Kyle is sooo genuinely impressed by all of Hal's stereotypical macho bullshit. Hal will take a shirtless picture with a Space Fish he caught with his bare hands and Kyle will be like 😍 wow he's so hot and cool. Hal takes a shirtless photo of himself flexing and Kyle is drooling while everyone else is like why the fuck is he taking an instagram photo, isn't he like 60. That's so lame. Hal will do the "you. here. now" gif and Kyle gets turned on. He is the basic white girl your parents warned you about.

Night In Headcanon

If they're staying home, they're fucking.

Night Out Headcanon

Usually Kyle is the one who wants to go out for a date, but sometimes Hal gets into these moods where he's like I Must Provide, I Must Prove Myself An Adequate Partner and he goes hard on charming and romancing Kyle and taking him out to fancy dinners and giving him flowers and Kyle is so weak. He is so weak to it. His dumb romantic heart is like 😍🥰😍🥰🥺🥰. They go on a lot of fun dates whenever they have the time and it's usually Kyle being sappy at Hal but Hal has decades of experience on Kyle and a better idea of the highfaluting life because of knowing Carol and Ollie. When he tries he can match Kyle in being gross and sappy but he needs to get over the mental hurdle of real men don't feel emotions etc etc so it's usually Kyle dragging him to new restaurants or the skating rink or to the alien opera.

Kissing Headcanon

They're banned from kissing on the watchtower because whenever they kiss it always leads to makeouts which always leads to someone getting sucked off in a closet and some people have superhearing and/or are psychic! Clark sees so much! J'onn also sees so much!!

Sleeping Headcanon

They don't sleep but when they do they always end up tangled around each other like an octopus. Kyle and Hal are both Cali boys, they need to stay warm.

How Friends/Family React

Wally is so incensed at that slut, Kyle, waltzing in and stealing EVERYONE FROM HIS LIFE. DOES HAL LIKE HIM BECAUSE HE PUTS OUT? WALLY CAN PUT OUT TOO. FIRST KYLE STEALS ROY AND DONNA FROM HIS LIFE AND THEN BATMAN PATS HIM ON THE HEAD AND CALLS HIM A GOOD BOY AND THEN HE STEALS HAL? UNCLE HAL? UNCLE HAL WHO IS WALLY'S PRECIOUS UNCLE AND WALLY DESERVES HIM! HE DESERVES HIM MORE THAN KYLE.

Everyone else is like 'nice' and then they try to angle for a threesome because Kyle and Hal are both notorious sluts.

Heartbreak Headcanon

Kyle gives himself full-body laser hair removal when he becomes god again and Hal breaks up with him because he likes the fur 😔 reblog if you cry everytime

NSFW Headcanons

Position/Locations

Any position, anywhere, any time. They are SO horny it's impossible to keep the beast contained, and by beast I mean their cock. Plus, with the use of their rings and flying abilities, it means they can try sooo many more creative positions.

Rough or Gentle? Fast or Slow?

Hal has two moods: Kyle is precious, I Cannot Hurt Him, I must worship him and be gentle with him, he is so much better than me, he is better than anyone in the world, he is so good, I cannot taint him

OR

I Am Going To Break His Spine

Meanwhile, Kyle likes it hard and rough. He doesn't like pain just for the sake of pain, but he loves feeling wanted, loves it when Hal just needs him so much he snaps and loses control and just takes from his body. Conversely he also likes slow, emotional sex where they whisper endearments at each other but Hal can't always handle that so it's usually hard and nasty. Hal adores Kyle. One way or another, he's going to give him what he wants.

Favourite Kinks/Fantasies/Toys

They have the world's greatest sex toy weapon on their fingers, they can do anything.

Hal does love tying Kyle up though. Kyle keeps trying to squirm free and touch himself on the few occasions Hal is patient enough to tease him and Hal's like >:| no. He also likes teasing Kyle in public, making a toy pop into existence inside him while Kyle struggles to keep his composure.

Kyle also likes tying Hal down but also he HAS to tie him down if he ever wants to take his time or dominate him. Hal has no respect for Kyle's authority 😔It's also the only time Kyle can lay on the praise kink. Sometimes! Kyle wants to be gross and sappy!! But Hal fucks him too hard for him to get any words out!!!

They both have a daddy kink. Kyle wants a daddy to ruffle his head and call him a good boy and Hal wants to feel important.

Who Tops/Bottoms, Who's Dominant/Submissive

They're both switches BUT Hal has Issues™ around giving up control and letting someone into his mind, so it usually works out to him domming Kyle. Kyle doesn't mind, but sometimes he just wants to dom his daddy, okay. Hal wrecks Kyle when he's domming him and it's so good but Kyle is actually the meaner dom. He's better at staying in control, laying out a scene and actually teasing Hal throughout instead of just snapping and fucking him to the point of unconsciousness. It takes waaaay longer to work Hal down to subspace than Kyle; Kyle has the finesse for that type of careful scene, Hal does not.

Public Play Headcanon

Hal takes every opportunity he can to tease Kyle in public. He'll make a construct buzz against Kyle's prostate while they're stuck in a league meeting, tug at is balls, pinch his nipples, light teasing touches all over his body while Kyle bites his lip and tries to not give himself away. It's a power rush. He likes watching Kyle's composure slip, loves edging him in public until Kyle can't hide what's happening to him. On Kyle's part, he's a freaky exhibitionist and he'll nut in a room full of people and then beg for more. He feels no shame. Hal does feel shame, though, so Kyle's more discreet when he teases him. He plays up his reactions until Hal snaps and fucks him in a public alleyway. Kyle uses constructs too to tease Hal, but he prefers to do things like whisper dirty talk in Hal's ear while they're trapped on a crowded subway.

Sensitive Spots/Favourite Tricks

When Hal fucked Kyle after their homoerotic plane ride, which is exactly what happened in canon, he touched Kyle's prostate for the first time and Kyle saw god. Kyle really likes getting fucked. Hal doesn't prep him as much as he should after long missions because he likes watching Kyle struggle to take him. He wants to make him feel it.

Hal has sensitive nipples and Kyle DOES use this knowledge to torment him when he's least expecting it. Also Kyle is great at dirty talk and for some reason this always surprises Hal.

Foreplay/Turn Ons

Hal doesn't believe in foreplay. Sometimes he tries to take it slow but then Kyle acts too sexy and all his restraint flies out the window. Kyle acts sexy on purpose but Hal doesn't know that, he just thinks Kyle was born with natural slut inclinations. Sometimes he does manage to hold onto restraint but it's always in a very dom/sub role. He can be patient when he's toying with Kyle and making him cry. Instant gratification, thy name is Hal.

Kyle LOVES foreplay. He loves slow kisses and cuddles and hickeys and fingering, but he is also impatient. He loves it when Hal overwhelms him, when Hal's so overtaken by lust he can't take it slow.

Foreplay for them is when they publicly tease each other until the other person snaps, lbr.

Kyle wants to be Hal's good little baby boy 🥺 praise REALLY gets him going. He wants to feel Loved and Safe, safe enough to not question anything that Hal does. He wants to sink into the mindspace where everything else in the world melts away. He wants to be bimbofied sooooo bad. Kyle doesn't want someone to take control with him, he wants to feel safe enough that he doesn't worry about clinging to control. He wants to feel free to express himself without any fear of repercussions.

Hal does want his control to be taken from him. He'll never give it up willingly. This is why Kyle is mean, because there has to be a fight in there. It has to be a struggle. The rituals are important!! Hal is a Strong Macho Man and he doesn't want things like to give up control or fall at the knees of his baby. He doesn't. He's strong and powerful and in control and nothing can take it away from him. (Please take it away from him)

Hal likes impact play. Kyle doesn't like impact play by itself, it has to be coached in something else, about how he's being good for his daddy by taking his punishment. He does like hurting Hal, though. It's the trust in the gesture, the fact that Hal feels comfortable enough to let Kyle hurt him. He likes the methodic way Hal breaks down as he switches from the flogger to the whip. Hal cracks for him. It makes Kyle's heart boner nut.

Never Again/Turn Offs

Kyle refused to dom Hal for the longest time because Hal is a dumbass and didn't want to hurt Kyle's feelings by safewording when the scene got too intense and then he avoided Kyle for days because what the fuck! Kyle is a baby! That BABY shouldn't be able to even PUSH him that far what the fuck waht the fuck he is STRONG he is STOLID he has NO TRIGGERS

Who Teases The Other? Who's More Impatient? Who Initiates?

Hal, Hal, Hal. Well. Okay, Kyle teases Hal by existing, and it's at least half on purpose. He loooves to rile Hal up and play innocent and watch him stew in frustration. Kyle likes edging. He likes to draw it out. Hal is so impatient. Once he gets over the hurdle of not being good enough for Kyle he's always touching him. Not in a PDA way, but just in a way where he has to remind himself that this is real, Kyle is real, Kyle wants him. And all of that touching gets Kyle riled up, and then he has to rile Hal up. It's a horny feedback loop.

They both initiate. They fuck like rabbits, everywhere, on every location, in public and private. They are soooo horny, they can't stop themselves. They don't want to stop.

Aftercare Headcanon

Hal didn't know what aftercare was at first and he didn't give Kyle all the attention he needed and it made Kyle so upset that John yelled at Hal. It never occurred to Kyle that Hal didn't know what aftercare was because the cuddling after isn't a separate part of sex for him, it's the whole point of sex. He needs the close contact and reassurance and cuddling and Love that comes after. Hal's used to packing up and skedaddling out as soon as sex is finished. He's like, my part here is done, time to never display any vulnerability or let another person close to me! This is normal. I am healthy. I am the pinnacle of mental health.

He starts cuddling Kyle and he's whammied by now nice it feels and how much he enjoys it. That's how Kyle traps Hal into a relationship with him.

[ask meme]

#halkyle #hal jordan #kyle rayner #asks #ask meme #wajjs #yes I reblogged this seven days ago yes I'm still doing them #time is fake

[enhypia]

SN ; always loving the sun

[4:21 PM]

okay so maybe the universe is not that bad

paring: kim sunoo x pisces gn!reader

genre: fluff, mild angst

word count: roughly 960 words

this is a two-part timestamp and this is the second part

read part 1 here!

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

you didn't go after it. but that didn't stop your feelings from growing.

it's final, the universe really is out to get you. you want to be around sunoo so bad but everything hurts. why were romantic feelings ever a thing.

"you're sure we're okay right?" sunoo asked again his lips pouting.

"yes sunoo, i swear, nothing's wrong, i've just been feeling drained lately, i think it's because of the chaos at home" you assured. 'it's actually because my feelings for you are eating me alive but you don't need to know that.' you thought

"well do you want to hang out after school later then? so you won't have to endure the noise for a while" he invited, his eyes sparkling again.

and that's the sound of your heart cracking, it took so much to not actually clutch your heart.

"sure! where are we going?" you replied brightly. sunoo visibly relaxes after seeing you being you again.

he's noticed changes in your attitude and it's always with him so he couldn't help but feel like he did something wrong. he knew you were lying but he didn't want to push since it was clear you weren't ready to say the truth.

it does sting that you can't tell him, but he understands, there are some things he can't tell you as well. like his big massive crush on you

"the arcade? then the park after?" he suggested.

"i'm good with the that, i have pent up rage about the stars, i'll release them on the shooting games" you joked making finger guns.

sunoo rolled his eyes at your antics, and maybe if you just looked closer, you would've seen the fondness and adoration in his look.

"the stars won't appreciate that" he teased, you shrugged in reply

"yeah well i don't appreciate what they've been doing lately so i think we're even"

"i can't wait for the day the stars give you what you want so i wouldn't have to hear you complaining"

"that's the dream sun, that's the dream"

'i don't think they'll give me you sunoo' you thought

⸻

walking in comfortable silence along the quieter parts of the park with sunoo was one of your favorite things in the world, but right now the dumb loud pounding of your heart is making you re-think.

"wait let me take a picture of the sky" you heard sunoo say. you stopped in your tracks and watch him take pictures, you couldn't help it and took a picture of him taking a picture.

"wow this turned out well" you said after checking the photo, you showed it to him and he smiled widely.

"send it to me, i'll post it on my instagram" he said then he went back to scrolling through the photos he took.

you continued to stare at the photo you took of him, another crack. the sound resonating in your brain.

he was walking ahead of you, i should probably get used to this view if all goes bad. you can't take hearing your heart break any more than it already is.

"hey sun" you call out softly and walking up to him.

"sun, look at my horoscope for the week" you said turning your phone to sunoo so he can read it.

"it's not hard to love. in fact you always are loving the sun. qualities of perspective ask you to consider. but your mind is made up" you read out loud, voice coming out a little shakey.

sunoo stares at you with wide curious eyes and gives you a questioning look.

"nothing sun, it's just scarily accurate." you stated. "it's not hard to love, in fact you always are loving the sun" you confessed, looking straight at him.

1.. 2.. 3.. a blush forms on his cheeks, his wide smile isn't helping. he covers his face with his hands.

he lets out a tiny squeal when he takes a peek at you.

"what?" you asked chuckling at his reaction. you're trying very hard to keep you cool.

"my brain isn't processing anything right now. you can't just drop something like that so suddenly! give a guy a warning. my heart is beating so fast it's like bang! bang! bang! you better take me to the hospital if something happens to me. oh god it's still not calming down. yah~ take responsibility for this" he rambles while clutching his heart.

you burst out laughing, the weight on your shoulder getting lighter.

"i had this whole thing planned out to confess to you but no you had to go and do it first, now what do i do with that idea? this is all your fault" he complained pouting at you. but your mind went blank the moment you heard "confess to you"

"you were going to what?" you asked in disbelief. sunoo's blush got impossibly deeper upon realizing what he said, he turned and speed walked away from you.

"yah! kim sunoo get back here!" you exclaimed chasing after him.

"no! go away!"

"kim sunoo if you like me stop right now!" you cry.

sunoo stopped. kim sunoo stopped.

you couldn't help the tears falling from your eyes. sunoo turned at the sound of your sniffling and he was right in front of you immediately.

"why? why? why?" he panicked trying to wipe your tears. you laughed at him, at yourself, at the universe.

"i'm just so happy, i didn't think it'd end this way" you answered.

sunoo rarely initiates skinship, but here he was engulfing you in a hug. the cracks in your heart were healing itself.

"are the stars on your side now?" he asked after releasing you from his hold.

"i think they always were, i just refused to listen"

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

prev.

masterlist ⸺ enhypen masterlist

a/n: this was longer than i intended it to be but im happy with the result, i got this idea when i saw the tweet for pisces about loving the sun, i instantly thought of sunoo, then the previous horoscope matches that's why i decided to cut it into two parts. i enjoyed writing this and i hope you guys like it as well <33

#enhypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #enhypen fluff #enhypen angst #enhypen timestamps #kim sunoo scenarios #kim sunoo imagines #kim sunoo timestamps #kim sunoo x reader #sunoo fluff #sunoo #enhypen sunoo #sunoo x reader #enhypen x gender neutral reader #sunoo imagines #sunoo scenarios #sunoo timestamps

[karezzasstuff]

From the project of interviewing Stanley S. Bass about his experiences with Karezza techniques, The Life Science Publishing created the 2008 book Energy-Karezza. Here Dr. Bass tells the story of how, in his 30’s, he was on his way to become a celibate yogi through Brahmacharya, when he learned about reaching the same spiritual goal via Karezza & Tantra. He decided to try Karezza instead.

Even though his personal goal was spiritual, Dr. Bass soon discovered that women loved Karezza, and couldn’t get enough. When he started teaching the improved Energy-Karezza method to couples with marital problems, the results were astounding. Usually, within weeks, the couple had fallen in love again. Problematic marriages healed, becoming more and more harmonious and stronger with time.

Over time, over 50+ years, he not only gained experience concerning every aspect of Karezza/Tantra, but also – thanks to his energy-understanding, being an orthopathic doctor – developed an improved, more powerful & easy-to-learn, version. Traditional “Karezza/Tantra” can be difficult for men, but “Energy-Karezza/Tantra” is easy, and also gives more pleasure & prolongation..

INTRODUCING OTHERS TO KAREZZA

Karezza is about one thing, the man has to control himself. It is so easy. I got so good at this control that I soon was able to go almost a whole year with no accidents. With very heavy sex - three times a week, four hours each session. It didn't take long to get to a high level of proficiency.

In a few months I was very good at it already.

It is very simple, it is natural. It is not difficult. Prove it for yourself, don't take my word for it. Try it out. The first time I heard about it, it was strange to me, so I tried it. It didn't take me long to get good at it. It was easier than I thought. In fact, I taught Karezza to a lot of friends, and everyone had success.

If one of them asked me, "how do I know if it will work?", I gave him a simple method of trying it. I usually said, "why don't you first try:

1. Don't have an orgasm quickly, but wait until the woman is finished, until she has had her enjoyment. Practice holding back for half an hour, for an hour, for several hours, if you can.

2. Then you'll see that your own orgasms are better; they are more enjoyable.

3. Also try having an orgasm only every other time you have sex.

Skipping one time. Every other time, try without orgasm. See how you feel."

With my sex students, those were my instructions, to begin with. These instructions summarize basic traditional Karezza. But these simple instructions could still be difficult for some men. They lost control (ejaculated) early, and were never able to do Karezza for a full hour.

Therefore, to make it easier, I gave my students some Energy-Karezza secrets. I asked them to improve their diet, and to avoid alcohol and all drugs. I told them not to eat before sex, because a man can not control himself after he has eaten. Why? Because then too much blood goes to the stomach.

Also, I gave very detailed instructions on the best movements in sex. I told them to move slowly, and explained how to move, so they wouldn't get too excited, e.g. sideways, in semicircles, avoiding the in-out moves.

For the premature ejaculators, I told them to give up salt, and to not use anything spicy hot, avoid hot peppers, stay away from spices, because this throws them out of control. And then I told them to use certain motions, slow motions, that makes it easy to control oneself. That's all.

Then the women will get the pleasure, because the men are controlling themselves.

For some men the pleasure was so overwhelming that they were still unable to control themselves very long, more than perhaps 45 minutes, even if their diet was good and they had high vitality. In these cases I think the solution is just doing it over and over. Sometimes men, just like women, may need saturation with lots of high-pleasure peak orgasms, before they can start with serious self-control and higher-pleasure valley orgasms. It may take months, but in the end they will get there.

I myself was never overly concerned with the clitoris or the G-spot, because the Karezza was so enjoyable and I was so good at it that a woman couldn't hold out long. If they wanted to have an orgasm, they could have it quick. Women enjoyed it.

The women were very happy. After beginning Karezza, it became unnecessary to calculate all this stuff. I never had to actually figure it out.

All I did was to function naturally, the way I felt like, without thinking about it. And it was right, for every woman. If one gets too mechanical about it, one becomes a dud. Then it is not real. Real sex has nothing to do with the brain, it has to do with feelings, true feelings and movement.

That's all. The brain is not needed.

From page 45 the Technique to Paradise.

🍎🐍🏖️

YAB YUM

What are you experiencing?

~ by yab yum

Be patient. At first you can't experience the orgasmic part of this process. Some get it on their first try and for some it can take years. Keep practicing with the exercise your teacher gives you. Even if you don't experience the orgasm, just the breath and energy circling alone is of great value. It will clear blocks so that eventually the orgasm can pass through you. Blocks can be experienced in many ways – crying, gagging, getting frustrated, resurfacing old memories. Just keep breathing. Visualize letting go of the "old" on the exhale, ringing out the "new" on the inhale. Energy levels will most likely rise and fall, like mercury in a thermometer. Tell your partner where it slipped. Your partner will encourage you to tap into your sexual center when energy is slipping. One of the main keys to learning this technique is KNOWING that it is possible.

(When asked if she had an orgasm, Sara responded 🙂

It was uninterrupted, uninterrupted… This was definitely something else, which I have never experienced so fully.

(Sara was then asked if there were any psychological changes.)

Oh yes, sure. From the point of view of spiritual practice it is always full of insight, a kind of insight that comes after, about how I am in ecstasy in my usual state, because it is obvious that the ecstasy is inherent in the body (level), of my being… and also of course this would affect my meditation. I am much more relaxed and receptive physically, emotionally and psychologically when I sit down to meditate…. I don't know what this has to do with anything, but meditation becomes very sexual, very physical, playing with all these hormones. Very often in my meditation there is a stage like deepening where it goes through something like lovemaking in a hormonal sense. I feel the heat and change of energy and so forth, and then it just cools down. That is when deep meditation begins.

It is absolutely blissful in ecstasy because the bliss is something I feel in the body. The ecstasy is something where the body is no longer. Energy goes up. His community. It is love. The transcendent, the energy feeling, transcends even the light that I'm talking about in meditation, and just went into the light.

One tree merges with another tree, the earth merges with the trees, the trees merge with the sky, the sky merges with the unknown...you merge with me, I merge with you...everything merges...differences lost, melting and merging as waves into other waves…an enormous unity vibrating, alive, without limits, without definitions, without distinction…the sage melting into the sinner, the sinner flowing together in the sage…becoming good becoming bad, becoming bad…the night turning into the day, day turning into night… life melts into death, death plunges into life again – then everything has become one.

This has changed my experience with sexuality forever… It has blown up things like this what you have about sex, the good feeling you get from sexual experience or trying to get. It broke that because it was so obviously about submission. It wasn't about me trying to do something. It was about not doing something, but rather receiving or allowing it, rather than doing and creating and making.

This is the most profound healing practice I have ever encountered. It has awakened me to realize that my body is often shut off from the bliss and ecstasy it might be experiencing. Through this practice I have come to learn that emotional pain occurs when orgasmic energy does not flow freely through my body and that there is an infinite flow of orgasmic energy available to me. It has taken me years to gradually release the tension and pain in my body and I still have areas of tension to unblock. The sensations can be different each time depending on my condition, sometimes there is a pulsating vibration and sometimes it feels like some kind of electrical current circulating through my genitals throughout my body. There may be tears of joy. My mind can be perfectly clear and it can seem like everything I feared has been resolved. When a certain area of ​​tension is unblocked and the orgasmic energy circulates, there is always an amazing sense of oneness with the life being awakened.

Mel 40 Auckland

My teacher knew how to touch – and where to make contact – He knew places to touch that I didn't know about – and soon I was on my way to another place in another universe. I was in a trance of breathing and sweat and pleasure that so long and so dead do had gone – that I traveled through light and sound. I never knew that such an experience could be had without actually making love. When I finally climaxed and climaxed and climaxed, I couldn't believe I was having a sexual climax in the presence of someone other than my husband. I felt both excitement and a little embarrassment. Looking back at this moment, I would never have thought that having an orgasm for another man would actually be the "beginning" of this whole journey in Tantra

Emma S 35

Auckland

And this is the joy of Cosmic Spiritual Orgasm, because you disappear for a moment. That moment is very small, but its impact is immense. For a moment you are no longer the ego, you do not think in terms of 'I', for a moment you dissolve into the oneness of the all, you become one with the whole, you pulsate with the whole. You are no longer an individual… you are no longer limited to your body. You have no limitations, for a moment you are unlimited, infinite.

That is the meaning of Cosmic Spiritual Orgasm – that your frozen energy melts, becoming one with this universe, with the trees and the stars, and the woman and the man, and the rocks – for a single moment, of course. But in THAT moment you have a kind of consciousness that is religious, that is sacred, that is one with all things. – OSHO

Unbelievable! Some are very strong and some are wonderfully subtle. In general, the more time you spend building up the energy, the more powerful the sensations. You experience “electricity” throughout your body, hands, feet and lips tingle, and there is a sense of letting go and receiving at the same time. You will feel high, euphoric and light-headed. It feels very different from a clitoral orgasm (but it can happen at the same time as a clitoral orgasm). You see a seed sprout, flowers appear on a tree somewhere, the birds are singing – the whole phenomenon is sexual. It is life manifesting in many ways. When the bird sings, it is a sexual call, an invitation. When the flower attracts butterflies and bees, it is an invitation, because the bees and butterflies bear the seeds of reproduction. Everything seems to be divided into these two polarities. And life is a rhythm between these two opposites. Repulsion and attraction, coming closer and getting far… these are the rhythms.

Z

#awakening #tantra #unconditionallove #karezza #nirvana #moksha #yabyum #freedom #liberty #hypocrisy #john lennon #the beatles #Youtube

[extorchic]

TOP 5 SK8 Episodes

So I got tagged by @akira-cr to make this list, it took some time but I think I've sorted out my mind, thank you for considering me 😊. Now here comes the list, sorry if it's supposd to be objective, but I'm gonna let my heart out over here (It's gonna be a long post and I'm not gonna cut it ):

NUMBER 5 - Episode 6 - Steamy Mystery Skating?! (A.K.A. The beach episode 🏊‍♂️)

Well this is supposed to be "breather" episode, and it's basically the one that sold the series to me. I like how fun and chill this episode is, although it does (further) foreshadow Reki's insecurity issues. The music is of course SUBLIME! "Seize the Moment" is probably my favorite insert song of all time! (it's been present in Reki's beefs as well, but here it really reflects the fun nature of his character and the show overall). And of coruse, FANSERVICE, not so much in how the boys were in swimsuits (though I gotta admit Reki does look good in them), but on the RENGA interactions!

That hug gave me life! How Langa was worried 24/7 about Reki being injured, at the end when they skated together to escape from the Bantu! I gotta admit that I have some mixed feelings about the implications of Reki being attracted to the faceless girl (I mean, Bi rep is very important too), but I guess my shipping side was just as jelaous as Langa was supposed to be (according to the fans LOL).

NUMBER 4 - Episode 11 - King vs. Nobody (A.K.A. Reki rising! ✨🌺🌞⚙️)

Reki is, without a doubt, my favorite character. He doesn't need to win, he doesn't need to be super flashy while skating, he just needs to be himself. He's been through a lot, many people (including me) have felt tremendously related to him, and seeing him in this episode is just satisfying. With his issues behind, with a promise to skate with Langa after he wins and no longer fearful, Reki rematches against Adam; and the way he does is fantastic! Taking advantage of his creativity, observative skills and mechanical knowledge on skateboarding, he faces up against the main boss and manages to not only endure his violent ways (which were gruelling to see, TBH), but also SOUNDLY HUMILIATE HIM in front of the whole S Community!

Yes, Adam, the "God of S", in the ground covered in mud by a boy almost everyone dissmissed! It was really sunshine through rainfall! I must also add how much I liked to see his renewed relationship with Langa, how much they treasure their company after patching up. I want to elaborate on this in its own post but I personally see that their interactions from this point on are more, I don't know, tender, caring, still playful but not in an entirely comedic way. The way they see each other is also deeper, anyway, it's just what I see.

NUMBER 3 - A DRAW: Episode 8 - The Fated Tournament! and Episode 9 - We Were Special Back Then (A.K.A. The month in which I was in an emotional crisis because of anime sk8t3r b0is 🍎🐍😭🛹❄🍵🌸 )

This is the point in which I got into the show, and the fandom (Yeah, haven't been around for too long). At this point the show wasn't the same, and I realized it when I caught up. Though there were some cool skating scenes in these episodes, the events that caught my attention were outside the road (Yeah, this was no longer just a skateboard anime, it's a whole lot more). Though I had been mainly focusing on Reki and Langa, I really liked having more backstory related to Joe, Cherry, Adam and Tadashi. Seeing how Adam went through a terrible childhood, convoluted teeange years to culminate in an adult with too much power for his own good and a twisted sense of "love", along with some extremely serious psychological issues was very interesting.

I acknowldge him as a complex villain, but that DOES NOT justify what he did to Cherry. This only proves that just because we know his backstory, we don't have to sympathize with him (Adam's just such a terrible person). On the RENGA side, we see Reki avoiding Langa after their rift, and how this affected both. We have Langa's sadness increase scene after scene, as well as his passion for skating dwindling as progressively. Reki on the other hand, just falls deeper and deeper in his depression, but also being unable to stop thinking about Langa, and he ends up going to S to see the latter's match against Joe. It's hard to see whether there's envy, jelaousness, frustration, admiration, pining or fear of being left behind in his mind. It must have been hard for a 17 y/o.

Reki also defends Langa from people speaking behind his back and shouting his name during the race boosts Langa's performance tremendously. This culminates on Reki realizing that the thing he actually wanted was to skate alongside Langa, not on the side, not as support, but together, he just couldn't. There's also the scene which may or may not confirm that Langa's feelings for Reki are more than just friendship! (Felt represented, for reals).

NUMBER 2 - Episode 7 - We Don't Balance Out (A.K.A. This was supposed to be a fun show!😭⛈️💔️)

I wrote a lot about the episodes in the previous spot, but this is the one that flipped the tables, the game-changer, and the one that hit closer home. It is a sad episode, no races there, it's just here for us to see how the circumstances affect the characters. It was hard to see how Reki, who at this point had been nothing but supportive and proud of Langa, starts to see him flying farther from him. Is it jealousness? Dissatisfaction? Is it fear of loneliness? Adbandoment issues? Is it feeling inferior? Frustration? Not being able to improve? Admiration? Care?

And on top of that a broken promise. I just can't imagine how hard is it for a 17 y/o to deal with all of those conflicting issues in his head, as well as the toxic competitive environment on the "S Community". This just came to show that he wasn't just the excitable, goofy sidekick character, he goes deeper than that, and makes him relatable. We also see a deconstruction of the cool, aloof prodigious character in Langa, as he just can't comprehend what's going on with Reki, and he's hurt by it, but still needs to figure out his own ambitions and desries. This leads to the emotional conclusion of the episode (which in turn left me in the aforementioned 4-week-long emotional crisis, thank you)

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Episode 12 - Our Infinity! - The race was cool, the Renga hug gave me life and everyone had a happy ending

Episode 5 - Passionate Dancing Night! - Despite the beef between Langa and Adam being cool, we start to see Reki worrying about Langa and opening up to him, further deepening their bond.

Episode 2 - Awesome for the First Time! - There's just something special about sharing something you're passionate about with someone else. Watching Reki teaching Langa the basics of skateboarding was heartwarming

NUMBER 1 - Episode 10 - DAP Not Needing Words

After 4 weeks waiting, the anticipation for this episode was gargantuan. Reki's depression was hitting its lowest point, bordering in self-harm, and hurting others as well. Langa continues to look for Reki after seeing him briefly at the hospital while visiting Shadow and we get to see this loving scene where he watches videos of Reki learining how to skate. After confronting Tadashi and realizing that he loves skating because it's fun, he returns home to find out that Langa had been waiting for him but left shortly before he arrived.

This leads to a heartful reunion, where words can't express their feelings, so they resort to do their thing, to skate, and that's where the feelings flow. This is when Langa tells Reki how he admires him tremendously and Reki understands that Langa'll be there by his side, and leaves his fears behind. With a mutual desire to skate together infinetely and a new dap, they rekindle their bond. People watched this show for different reasons, and though I like the skateboarding aspect because it looks cool, my interest leans more on the relationship aspect, and Reki and Langa's is so deep and intimate, and I liked seeing it grow from zero through different hardships (in other words, in all of the years I've been in a fandom, I had never shipped any other pair like these two, I needed to say that).

So I guess it's time to tag some people:

@pico-sour, @sleebycryptid, @elizabethslee, @itsamole, @kaorucherry, @blueflame97, @trieizieme, @tardiskitten, @lady-pendragon-9

So, if you've read until this point, thank you very much (I know it's not supposed to, but this post is yet again a very long "I love Renga" one, but it's what my heart wanted me to write 😅). I'd love to see people other than the ones I tagged showing their lists 😃

#sk8 the infinity #sk8 #sk8 reki #reki kyan #sk8 langa #langa hasegawa #sk8 renga #renga #lanreki #rekilan #top 5 #sk_8

[snake-rot]

(EXCLAIMING)

(ORCHESTRA MUSIC BLARING)

(GROANS)

(WHIMPERS)

(GRUNTING)

(MYSTICAL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

(GROANS)

(COUNTRY ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

(COUGHS)

Sweet home Alabama

Where the skies are so blue

WOMAN: Excuse me, sir, is there a commode?

Sweet home Alabama

(GRUNTING)

Lord, I'm coming home to you

(GRUNTS) Justin!

Quick, honey, take my picture. I got the pyramid in my hand.

(CAMERA CLICKING)

Yeah

Justin, you get back here right now!

No, stop!

GUARD 1: No, no, no! Stop him! GUARD 2: Go back! Don't climb!

(JUSTIN IMITATING AIRPLANE WHOOSHING)

Wait, wait.

Hold on. Easy, little boy.

Okay, stop, child! Stop right there. No!

(GASPS)

No, no, no, no, no! Oh! There he goes.

(GASPS)

Justin!

I've got him! I've got him!

(JUSTIN GRUNTS)

(AIR ESCAPING)

Outrage in Egypt tonight as it was discovered

that the Great Pyramid of Giza had been stolen

and replaced by a giant inflatable replica.

There is panic throughout the globe as countries and citizens

try to protect their beloved landmarks.

Law enforcement still has no leads,

leaving everyone to wonder, which of the world's villains

is responsible for this heinous crime?

And where will he strike next?

Gru: Freeze ray! Freeze ray! Freeze ray! [laughs evilly] Fred: Morning, Gru! How you doing? Gru: Hello, Fred. FYI, your dog has been leaving little bombs all over my yard, and I don't appreciate it. Fred: Sorry. You know dogs. They go wherever they wanna go. Gru: Unless they're dead. [laughs] I'm joking! Although, it is true. Anyway, have a good one. Fred: Okay. Yeah. Steamrolling whatever Gru: [groans] You've got to be pulling on my leg! Margo: Hello! Cookies for sale. Gru: Go away. I'm not home. Margo: Uh, yes, you are. I heard you. Gru: [gasps] No, you didn't. This... [monotone] is a recording. Margo: [scoffs] No, it isn't. Gru: Yes, it is. [o.s.] Watch this. Leave a message, beep. [Edith kicks the door] Gru: Ow! Agnes: Goodbye, recorded message. Margo: [o.s.] Agnes, come on. Gru: Huh? [screams] Kyle! Bad dog! No! No, no. Sit. My muffin. Dr. Nefario: Gru! Gru: Ah, Dr. Nefario. Dr. Nefario: I know how you must be feeling. I, too, have encountered great disappointment, but, in my eyes, you will always be one of the greats. Gru: What? What happened? Dr. Nefario: It's all over the news! Some fella just stole a pyramid. They're saying he makes all other villains look... lame. pause Gru: Assemble the minions! [throws Kyle off of his arm] Minions, assemble! Minion: Okay. Okay. Hey! Gru: Looking good, Kevin! How is the family? Good? All right. That's my Billy boy! What up, Larry? Hello, everybody! Yeah, all right! Simmer down. Simmer down! Thank you, okay. Now, I realize that you guys probably heard about this other villain who stole the pyramids. Apparently, it's a big deal. People are calling it the crime of the century and stuff like that. But am I upset? No, I am not! A little, but we have had a pretty good year ourselves, and you guys are all right in my book. Minion: Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Gru: No, no raises! You're not going to get any raises. What did we do? Well, we stole the Times Square JumboTron! Nice! That's how I roll. Yeah, you all like watching football on that, huh? But that's not all. We stole the Statue of Liberty, the small one from Las Vegas. And I won't even mention the Eiffel Tower! Also Vegas. Okay, I wasn't going to tell you about this yet, but I have been working on something very big! Something that will blow this pyramid thing out of the water! And thanks to the efforts of my good friend Dr. Nefario... Dr. Nefario: Thank you! Gru: There he is. He's stylin'. Now, we have located a shrink ray in a secret lab, and once we take this shrink ray, we will have the capability to pull off the 'true crime of the century. We are going to steal... The Minions all pull out their weapons in response. Gru: Wait, wait! I haven't told you what it is yet. One of the Minions, Dave, shoots his rocket launcher at a crowd of Minions. Gru: Hey. Dave, listen up, please! Dave: Ditto. One of the Minions Dave shot walks over to him and punches him on the shoulder. Gru: Next, we are going to steal, pause for effect, the moon! The Minions cheer in response. Gru: And once the moon is mine, the world will give me whatever I want to get it back! And I will be the greatest villain of all time! That's what I'm talkin' 'bout. [picks up his phone] Yes? Dr. Nefario: Hello, Gru? I've been crunching some numbers, and I really don't see how we can afford this. It can't be done. I'm not a miracle worker. Gru:Hey, chillax. I'll just get another loan from the bank. They love me! Margo: Edith, stop it! Edith: What? I'm just walking. Girls: Hi, Miss Hattie. We're back. Miss Hattie: Hello, girls! Agnes: Anybody come to adopt us while we were out? Miss Hattie: Hmm... Let me think. No! Edith immediately puts a mud pie on Miss Hattie's desk, much to her displeasure. Miss Hattie: Edith! What did you put on my desk? Edith: A mud pie. Miss Hattie: [sighs] You're never gonna get adopted, Edith. You know that, don't you? Edith: Yeah, I know. Miss Hattie: Good. So, how did it go, girls? Did we meet our quotas? Margo: Hmm... Sorta. We sold 43 mini-mints, 30 choco-swirlies and 18 coco-nutties. Miss Hattie: [gets up] Okay.

Well, you say that like it's a great sale day. [furious] Look at my face! Do you still think it's a great sale day? Edith rolls her eyes in response. Miss Hattie: [hangs up a portrait] Eighteen coco-nutties. I think we can do a little better than that, don't you? Yeah. We wouldn't want to spend the weekend in the Box of Shame, would we? No. Girls: No, Miss Hattie. Miss Hattie: Okay, good. Off you go. Go clean something of mine. Girls: Hi, Penny. Penny: Hi, guys. Gru: Hello, Mom. Sorry, I meant to call, but... Gru's Mom: I just wanted to congratulate you on stealing the pyramid. [Gru sighs in disgust] That was you, wasn't it? Or was it a villain who's actually successful? [laughs] Gru: Just so you know, Mom, I am about to do something that's very, very big, very important. When you hear about it, you're going to be very proud. Gru's Mom: Ha! [sarcastically] Good luck with that. Okay, I'm outta here. [hangs up the phone before sending her karate instructor flying] Gru: Gru to see Mr Perkins Receptionist: Yes, please have a seat. Neil Armstrong: That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind. Young Gru: Ma, someday I'm going to go to the moon. Gru's Mom: I'm afraid you're too late, Son. NASA isn't sending the monkeys any more. Vector: Hey. I'm applying for a new villain loan. Go by the name of Vector. It's a mathematical term, a quantity represented by an arrow, with both direction and magnitude. Vector! That's me, 'cause I'm committing crimes with both direction and magnitude. Oh, yeah! Check out my new weapon. Piranha gun! Oh, yes! Fires live piranhas. Ever seen one before? No, you haven't. I invented it. Do you want a demonstration? Shoot! So difficult, sometimes, to get the piranha back inside of my... Receptionist: Mr Gru, Mr Perkins will see you now. Gru: So, all I need is money from the bank to build a rocket. And then, the moon is ours. Perkins: Wow! Well, very nice presentation. I'd like to see this shrink ray. Gru: Absolutely! Will do. Soon as I have it. Perkins: You don't have it? And yet you have the audacity to ask the bank for money? Gru: Apparently. Perkins: Do you have any idea of the capital that this bank has invested in you, Gru? With far too few of your sinister plots actually turning a profit. How can I put it? Let's say this apple is you. If we don't start getting our money back... Get the picture? Look, Gru, the point is, there are a lot of new villains out there, younger than you, hungrier than you, younger than you. Like that young fellow out there named Vector. He just stole a pyramid! Gru: I've got it. I've got it. So, as far as getting money for the rocket... Perkins: Get the shrink ray, then we'll talk. Minion: Suckers! Suckers! Gru: We got it! What? Hey! Hey! What! Hey! No, no, no! You! Vectors: Now, maybe you'll think twice before you freeze someone's head! So long, Gru! Gru: Quick! We can't let him get away! Up ahead! Up ahead! Fire! Fire, now! Vector: You missed me! Gru: Come to papa! Take that. Vector: How adorable. Gru: Got you in our sights! Like taking candy from a... What? Vector: Hey, Gru! Try this on for size! Gru: That's weird. What is going... This is claustrophobic! No, no, no! Too small! This is too small for me! [groans] I hate that guy. Margo: ...and please watch over us, and bless that we'll have a good night's sleep. Edith: And bless that while we're sleeping, no bugs will crawl into our ears and lay eggs in our brains. Margo: Great. Thanks for that image, Edith. Agnes: And please bless that someone will adopt us soon, and that the mommy and daddy will be nice and have a pet unicorn. Amen. Margo/Edith: Amen. Agnes: Unicorns, I love them Unicorns, I love them Uni, uni, unicorns I love them Uni, unicorns, I could pet one If they were really real And they are So, I bought one so I could pet it Now it loves me Now I love it Gru: Don't you... What the... Good luck, little girls! Edith: Whoa! Cool. Margo: Hi! We're orphans from Miss Hattie's Home for Girls. Vector: I don't care. Beat it! Margo: Come on! We're selling

cookies so, you know, we can have a better future. Vector: Wait, wait! Do you have coco-nutties? Margo: Yeah. Gru: Light bulb. Dr Nefario! I'm going to need a dozen tiny robots disguised as cookies! Dr. Nefario: What? Gru: Cookie robots! Dr. Nefario: Who is this? - Gru: Oh, forget it. Mrs. Hattie: Well, it appears you have cleared our background check, Dr Gru. And I see you have made a list of some of your personal achievements. Thank you for that. I love reading. And I see you have been given the Medal of Honor and a knighthood. - Minions: Me, me, me. Me, me, me. Minion: Kevin? Mrs. Hattie: You had your own cooking show and you can hold your breath for 30 seconds? It's not that impressive. Minion: Idiot! - Minions: Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Mrs Hattie: What in the name of... What? Gru: Well, here's the dealio. Things have been so lonely since my wife, Debbie, passed on. It's like my heart is a tooth, and it's got a cavity that can only be filled with children. I'm sorry. You are a beautiful woman. Do you speak Spanish? Mrs. Hattie: Do I look like I speak Spanish? Gru: You have a face como un burro. Mrs. Hattie: Well, thank you! Gru: Anyway, can we proceed with this adoption? So, so excited! Mrs. Hattie: Please tell Margo, Edith and Agnes to come to the lobby. Margo: I bet the mom is beautiful! Edith: I bet the daddy's eyes sparkle. Agnes: I bet their house is made of Gummi Bears. [Edith and Margo look at her curiously] I'm just saying it'd be nice. [picks up a Cheeto] Aww. My caterpillar never turned into a butterfly. Edith: That's a Cheeto. Agnes: Oh... [eats said Cheeto, making Edith and Margo recoil in disgust] Miss Hattie: Well, Debbie was a very lucky woman. [pause] Gru: Who's Debbie? Mrs Hattie: Your wife. Hi, girls! Girls, I want you to meet Mr Gru. He's going to adopt you. And he's a dentist! Agnes: Yeah! Margo: Hi. I'm Margo. This is Edith. And that's Agnes. Agnes: [sing-song] I got your leg, I got your leg! Gru: Okay, that is enough, little girl. Let go of my leg. Come on. You can do it. Agnes: Higher! Higher! Gru: Just release your grip. Wow! How do you remove them? Is there a command? Some nonstick spray? Crowbar? [sighs] Okay, girls, let's go. [They drove off in the distance.]Vector: Uh-huh! Oh, yeah! Pretty impressive! What are you looking at? Boo-ya! You got shrunk, tiny mouthwash! Take that! You done been shrunk! (His phone rings) Yello? I got the shrink ray, all right. No, I'm not playing with it. Gru? Don't make me laugh! No. P.S., he is not getting the moon, and P.P.S., by the time I'm done with him, he's gonna be begging for mercy. (Shrinks a toilet) Okay, bye. (Hangs up) Look at you, a little tiny toilet for a little tiny baby to... [The toilet pops out and water sprays him.]Vector: Curse you, tiny toilet! [Gru and the Girls arrive at Gru's Home.] Gru: "Okay, here we are. Home sweet home. Margo: So... This is, like, your house? [realizing] Wait a sec... You're the guy who pretended he was a recorded message! Gru: No, that was someone else. [Margo gives a skeptical look before she, Edith and Agnes enter Gru's house, with Gru following suite.] Agnes: [scared] Can I hold your hand? Gru: Uh... No. Edith: [looks around] When we got adopted by a bald guy, I thought this'd be more like "Annie". Gru: No, hey! [screams] Kyle, these are not treats. These are guests. Girls, this is Kyle, my... Dog. Kyle snarls in anger. Agnes: Ooh! Fluffy doggy! [approaches Kyle before he runs away, much to her disappointment] Margo: What kind of dog is that? Gru: He is a... I don't know. Margo: Do you really think that this is an appropriate place for little kids? 'Cause, uh... It's not. [Edith sees a closet that is sharp and goes in it.] Gru: No! No! Stay away from there! It's frag... [He sees juice spilling on the floor.]Both: (Gasps) Gru: Well, I suppose the plan will work with two. Edith: [muffled] Hey! It's dark in here. [Gru opens the iron maiden, revealing Edith, who spits out a straw]Edith: It poked a hole in my juice box. [They went to the

kitchen.] Gru: As you can see, I have provided everything a child might need. All right. Okay. As I was saying... (Edith knocked a bottle down) Gru: (Cont'd) Hey! Oh. Edith: Somebody broke that. Gru: "Okay, okay. Clearly, we need to set some rules. Rule number one. You will not touch anything. Margo: Uh-huh. What about the floor? Gru: Yes, you may touch the floor. Margo: What about the air? Gru: Yes, you may touch the air! Edith: (Gets out a laser gun) What about this? Gru: (Screams) Where did you get that? Edith: [shrugs] Found it. Gru: Okay. Rule number two. You will not bother me while I'm working. Rule number three. You will not cry or whine or laugh or giggle or sneeze or burp or fart! So, no, no, no annoying sounds. All right? Agnes: Does this count as annoying? [popping] Gru: Very! [sighs] I will see you in six hours. Margo: Okay, don't worry. Everything's going to be fine. We're gonna be really happy here. Right? Agnes? Gru: Question. What are these? Dr. Nefario: A dozen boogie robots! Boogie! Look at this. Watch me! Gru: Cookie robots. I said cookie robots. Why are you so old? Dr. Nefario: Okay. I'm on it. Margo: Hello? Agnes: TV! Margo: What is that? Edith: Whoa! That is cool! Come on! Agnes: I don't think he's a dentist.Dr. Nefario: We've been working on this for a while. It's a anti-gravity serum. I meant to close that. He'll be all right, I'm sure. Gru: Do the effects wear off? Dr. Nefario: So far, no. No, they don't. And here, of course, is the new weapon you ordered. Gru: No, no. I said "dart gun," not... Okay. Dr. Nefario: Oh, yes. 'Cause I was wondering under what circumstances would we use this? But, anyway. What I really wanted to show you was this. Gru: Now those are cookie robots! Agnes: La, la, la, la I love unicorns Gru: What are you doing here? I told you to stay in the kitchen! Margo: We got bored. What is this place? Edith: Can I drink this? Dr. Nefario: Do you want to explode? [Edith kicks him in the shin] Dr. Nefario: Gru! Gru: Get back in the kitchen! Agnes: Will you play with us? Gru: No. Agnes: Why? Gru: Because I'm busy. Margo: [scoffs] Doing what? Gru: Umm... Okay, okay, you got me. The dentist thing is more of a hobby. In real life, I am a spy. And it is top secret, and you may not tell anybody, because if you do... Edith: What does this do? [She fires a laser and it hits Agnes's unicorn and it burns to ashes]Gru: Hey! Edith: Whoops. Agnes: My unicorn! You have to fix it. Gru: Fix it? Look, it has been disintegrated. By definition, it cannot be fixed. [Agnes gasps in shock, then starts holding her breath] Gru: That's freaking me out. What is she doing? Margo: She's gonna hold her breath until she gets a new one. Gru: [sighs] It is just a toy. Now stop it! (Agnes faints) Gru: Okay, okay! I'll fix it! Tim! Mark! Phil! This is very important. You have to get the little girl a new unicorn toy. Gru: Hey, hey, hey! A toy! Go, and hurry! What are those? Gru: They are my... Cousins. Jerry! Stuart! Watch them and keep them away from me please. [The three minions put on a disguise and head to the store.]Minions: Wow!- Wow! [Meanwhile the two minions and the girls are tossing toilet paper at each other. Gru comes up and he sees the Girls and the two minions having fun.]Edith: It was your cousin's idea. Jerry: What? Gru: Okay, bedtime. Girls: Aww... Minions: Aww... Gru: Not you two! Minions: Yay. Gru: Okey-dokey. Beddie-bye. All tucked in. Sweet dreams. Margo: Just so you know, you're never gonna be my dad. Gru: I think I can live with that. Edith: Are these beds made out of bombs? Gru: Yes, but they are very old and highly unlikely to blow up. But try not to toss and turn. Edith: "Cool." Agnes: Will you read us a bedtime story?" Gru: No. Agnes: But we can't go to sleep without a bedtime story. Gru: Well, then it's going to be a long night for you, isn't it? So, good night, sleep tight, and don't let the bed bugs bite. Because there are literally thousands of them. And there's probably something in your closet. Margo: He's just kidding, Agnes. Agnes: It's beautiful. Gru: Girls, let's go.

Time to deliver the cookies! Margo: Okay. But first, we're going to dance class. Gru: Actually, we're going to have to skip the dance class today. Margo: Actually, we can't skip the dance class today. We have a big recital coming up. We're doing an excerpt from Swan Lake. Agnes: Yeah, Swan Lake! Gru: That's fantastic. Wonderful. But we're going to deliver cookies! Come on! Margo: No. Gru: No? Margo: We're not going to deliver cookies until we do dance class. Really? Gru: Well, I am not driving you to dance class. So if you want to go, you are going to have to walk yourselves. What are you doing? Margo: Walking to dance class. Gru: Ya? Okay, fine. You just keep walking, because I'm really not driving you! Margo: Okay. Gru: You're going to suffer the wrath of Gru! Seriously, I'm going to count to three! And you had better be in this car! Here we go! One! Two! Teacher: ...three, four and five. And lift, and stretch. And one, and two... Agnes: Here you go. Gru: What is it? Agnes: Your ticket to the dance recital. You are coming, right? Gru: Of course, of course. I have pins and needles that I'm sitting on. Agnes: Pinkie promise? Gru: Oh, yes. My pinkie promises. All right. Our first customer is a man named Vector. Margo: But he's a V. You know, we're supposed to start with the A's. Then we go to the B's. Then we... Gru: Yes, yes! I went to kindergarten. I know how the alphabet works! I was just thinking that it might be nice to deliver Mr Vector's first. That is all. Almost over. It's almost over. Vector: Girls, welcome back to the fortress of Vector-tude! Do you have my cookies for me? Margo: Four boxes of mini-mints, two toffee totes, two caramel clumpies and fifteen boxes of coco-nutties. Vector: Exactly. I'd like to see somebody else order that many cookies. Not likely. Name one person who ordered more cookies than me. Margo: That'll be $52. Vector: Right. Seven, eight, nine... Tic Tacs! Where was I? Seven, eight, nine... Agnes: Why are you wearing pyjamas? Vector: These aren't pyjamas! This is a warm-up suit. Edith: What are you warming up for? Vector: Stuff. Agnes: What sort of stuff? Vector: Super-cool stuff you wouldn't understand. Agnes: Like sleeping? Vector: They are not pyjamas! Here you go, 52 big ones. Bye! Gru: Come on! Vector: What the...? Quiet down, fish. Down, boy!Gru: [laughs] We did it! Come on, girls, let's go! Margo: But what about the other people who ordered cookies? Gru: Life is full of disappointments... For some people. [chuckles ominously] Agnes: (Screams) Gru: Don't do that! Agnes: Super Silly Fun Land! Can we go? Please? Gru: No. Edith: But we've never been. And it's the funnest place on earth! Gru: "Don't care." Girls: Please? Please? We'll never ask for anything else, ever again! Pretty please? Please? Come on! Come on! Gru: "Light bulb." Edith: Come on! Gru: "Goodbye, have fun. [He began to leave. But a attendant of the roller coaster stopped him.]Carnival Ride Worker: Sorry, dude. They can't ride without an adult. Gru: What? [groans] [Soon Gru gets sick from the roller coaster ride.]Agnes: Oh, my gosh! Look at that fluffy unicorn! He's so fluffy, I'm gonna die! Margo: You've gotta let us play for it! Gru: No, no, no. Agnes: Come on! Gru: How much for the fluffy unicorn?Carnival Barker: Well, it is not for sale. But all you gotta do to win it is knock down that little spaceship there. It's easy! Agnes: Yay! Again! Margo: Wait! Edith: Come on. One more time! Agnes: Just one more. I accidentally closed my eyes. I hit it! I hit it! Edith: That was cool. Awww. Gru: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What was that? She hit that. I saw that with my own eyes.Carnival Barker: Hey, buddy, let me explain something to you. You see that little tin spaceship? You see how it's not knocked over? Do you know what that means, professor? It means you don't get the unicorn! Somebody's got a frowny face. Boo! Better luck next time! Gru: Okay, my turn. [Gru uses a fire gun and it blows up the whole booth.]Gru: "Knocked over!" Agnes: It's so fluffy! Yeah! Margo: That was

awesome! Edith: You blew up the whole thing! Agnes: Let's go. Let's try another game!Dr. Nefario: Gru, do you mind if I have a quick word? Gru: Okay, girls, go play. I got the shrink ray! Cotton candy! Dr. Nefario: We have 12 days until the moon is in optimum position. We can't afford any distractions! Gru: Get me Perkins. Sorry to bother you, Mr Perkins, but I figured that you would want to see this! Mr. Perkins: What? Well done, Gru. Rather impressive.Gru: Now, the rest of the plan is simple. I fly to the moon. I shrink the moon. I grab the moon. I sit on the toi-let. What? (girls start laughing) Sorry. Sorry! Could you excuse me for just one second? I told you not to touch my things. I told you, I told you. I've told you a thousand times. Margo: Hey, can we order pizza? Gru: Pizza? You just had lunch. Edith: Not now, for dinner. Gru: Dinner? Just... Fine, fine, fine, whatever. Just get back in there! Margo: Can we get stuffed crust? Agnes and Jerry: Stuffed crust!Gru: I'll stuff you all in the crust! Agnes: [giggles] You're funny! Gru: Just don't come out of that room again! All right. Sorry about that. Where were we? Mr. Perkins: You were sitting on the toilet. Gru: No, no, no! No, I'm sorry. It was a little attempt at humor. I know how much you like to laugh... [Mr. Perkins glares at him] Inside. Eh, now, I was saying... [the door suddenly opens] You don't seem terribly focused, Gru. Believe me, I am completely focused. Right? Edith: Hello! Mr. Perkins: What? Edith: That guy is huge! Agnes: Are we on TV? Mr. Perkins: What are those? Children?Gru: What are you doing? I told you to stay out of here! No, no, no! *Agnes: Freeze ray!Mr. Perkins: Mr Gru? Gru: Okay. As I was saying... Mr. Perkins: No need to continue. I've seen quite enough. Gru: But my plan... Mr. Perkins: Is a great plan. I love everything about your plan, except for one thing. You. Young Gru: Look, Mom, I drew a picture of me landing on the moon! Look, Mom, I made a prototype of the rocket out of macaroni! Look, Mom, I made a real rocket based on the macaroni prototype! Gru: I don't understand. Mr. Perkins: Let's face reality, Gru. You've been at this for far too long with far too little success. We're gonna put our faith, our money, into a... Well, a younger villain. Gru: But I... Mr. Perkins: It's over. Goodbye, Gru. Gru: Now, I know there have been some rumours going around that the bank is no longer funding us. Well, I am here to put those rumours to rest. They are true. In terms of money, we have no money. So how will we get to the moon? The answer is clear. We won't. We are doomed. Now would probably be a good time to look for other employment options. I know. I have fired up my resume as I suggest that all of you do, as well. What is it? Can't you see that I am in the middle of a pep talk? Yes! Yes, we will build our own rocket using this and whatever else we can find! Grab everything! Hit the junkyards! Take apart the cars! Who needs the bank? Let's go. Let's go! Mom! What are you doing here? Gru's Mom: And here he is in the bathtub. Look at his little buns. Gru: Mom. Not cool. Gru's Mom: And here, he's all dressed up in his Sunday best. Margo: He looks like a girl! Gru's Mom: Yes, he does. An ugly girl! Agnes: You're funny! Edith: Yes! Mine's shaped like a dead guy! Receptionist: Mr. Perkins, your son is here. Mr. Perkins: Send him in. Vector: Hey, Dad. You wanted to see me? Mr. Perkins: Yes, I did, Victor. - Vector: I am not Victor anymore. Victor was my nerd name. Now I am Vector! Mr. Perkins: Sit down. Do you know where the shrink ray is? Vector: Duh! Back at my place. Mr. Perkins: Oh, is that right? Back at your place? That's cool. I guess Gru must just have one that looks exactly like it! Vector: What the...?! Those girls sold me cookies! Mr. Perkins: Do you have any idea how lucrative this moon heist could be? I give you the opportunity of a lifetime, and you just blow it! Vector: No, I didn't. Mr. Perkins: Oh, really?Vector: You just wait until Gru sees my latest weapon. Squid-launcher! Oh, yeah! Man:

There's a squid on my face!Vector: Don't worry. The moon is as good as ours. Gru: Come on now, it's bedtime. Did you brush your teeth? Let me smell. Let me smell. You did not! Put on your PGs. Hold still. Okay, seriously! Seriously! This is beddie-bye time, right now. I'm not kidding around. I mean it! Edith: But we're not tired! Gru: Well, I am tired. Agnes: Will you read us a bedtime story? [pause] Gru: No. Agnes: Pretty please? Gru: The physical appearance of the "please" makes no difference. It is still no, so go to sleep. Edith: But we can't. We're all hyper! Margo: And without a bedtime story, we'll just keep getting up and bugging you. All night long. Gru: [sighs] Fine. All right, all right. Sleepy Kittens. Sleepy Kittens? What are these? Agnes: Puppets. You use them when you tell the story. Gru: Okay, let's get this over with. "Three little kittens loved to play, they had fun in the sun all day. "Then their mother came out and said, 'Time for kittens to go to bed."' Wow! This is garbage. You actually like this? Agnes: Keep reading! Edith: Come on! Gru: All right, all right, all right. "Three little kittens started to bawl, "'Mommy, we're not tired at all.' "Their mother smiled and said with a purr, "'Fine, but at least you should brush your fur."' Edith: Now you brush the fur. Gru: This is literature? A 2-year-old could have written this. All right. "Three little kittens with fur all brushed "said, 'We can't sleep, we feel too rushed! ' "Their mother replied, with a voice like silk, "'Fine, but at least you should drink your milk."' Agnes: Now make them drink the milk. Gru: I don't like this book. This is going on forever. "Three little kittens, with milk all gone, rubbed their eyes and started to yawn. "'We can't sleep, we can't even try.' Then their mother sang a lullaby. "'Good night kittens, close your eyes. Sleep in peace until you rise. "'Though while you sleep, we are apart, "'your mommy loves you with all her heart."' The end. Okay, good night. Agnes: Wait! Gru: What? Agnes: What about good night kisses? Gru: No, no. There will be no kissing or hugging or kissing. Margo: He is not gonna kiss us good night, Agnes. Agnes: I like him. He's nice.Edith: [turns off her light] But scary. Like Santa! Dr. Nefario: Only 48 hours till the launch, and all systems are go. Gru: About that, I was thinking that maybe we could move the date of the heist. Dr. Nefario: Please tell me this is not as a result of the girls' dance recital, is it? Gru: No, no, no! The recital? Don't... That's stupid! I just think it's kind of weird to do it on a Saturday. I was thinking, maybe a heist is a Tuesday thing, right? Dr. Nefario: Gru, you and I have been working on this for years. It's everything we've dreamed of. Your chance to make history, become the man who stole the moon! But these girls are becoming a major distraction! They need to go. If you don't do something about it, then I will. Gru: I understand. Dr. Nefario: Good. Minion: Butt. Butt. Butt. Gru: All right. Now, when we put our cups together, we will make the "clink" sound with our mouths. Ready? Edith? Gru: and Edith: Clink. Gru: There we go. And now we drink. And Agnes? Gru and Agnes: Clink. Gru: Very good! Excuse me, girls. Girls: Come on! Gru: Don't worry, I'll be back. Keep clinking. - Clink, clink. - Clink, clink.Gru: Miss Hattie, what are you doing here? Miss Hattie: I'm here for the girls. I received a call that you wanted to return them. [Gru gives her a quizzical look] And also, I did purchase a Spanish dictionary. [swats Gru's head with the dictionary] I didn't like what you said. Gru: But... I will get the girls ready. Agnes: Don't let her take us, Mr. Gru! Tell her you wanna keep us. Mrs. Hattie: All right, girls. Come on, let's go. Margo: Goodbye, Mr. Gru. Thanks for everything. Dr. Nefario: I did it for your own good. Come on, let's go get that moon. Gru: Right. What is this for? The recital? I am the greatest criminal mind of the century. I don't go to little girls' dance recitals! Dr. Nefario: Opening launch bay

doors. Commencing launch sequence. And we are good to go in T minus 10 seconds. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six... Vector: Oh, yeah! Gru: Nice work, Doctor. All systems go. Vector: Boo-ya! My flight suit. Oh, yeah! Once again, the mighty... Gru: I've got it! I've got the moon! I've got the moon. I can make it. Dr. Nefario: Wait a minute! Jerry: Kevin! Gru: Come on! Come on! Agnes: He's still not here. Margo: Why would he come? He gave us up. Agnes: But he pinkie promised! Teacher: Girls, girls, places. Edith: No, we can't start yet! We're still expecting someone. Agnes: Can we just wait a few more minutes? Teacher: All right. But just a few more minutes. Margo: He's not coming, guys. Dr. Nefario: Gru! Gru, can you hear me? Quick, we have to warn him, and fast!Gru: Okay, okay. There's the library. That's Third Street. The dance studio... There! There! There it is! Janitor: Sorry, buddy. Show's over.Gru: Over? Gru: Vector, open up! Vector: First give me the moon. Then we'll talk. Agnes: Mr. Gru! Vector: Zip it, Happy Meal. Gru: Now, the girls. Vector: Actually, I think I'll hold on to them a little while longer. Gru: No! Vector: Oh, yeah! Unpredictable! Gru: Listen close, you little punk. When I get in there, you are in for a world of pain! Vector: [laughs sarcastically] I'm really scared. Agnes: He is gonna kick your butt. Vector: What? He punched my shark! Dr. Nefario: There he is! Hang on, Gru. Oh, no! Gru: Vector has the girls. Go! Dr. Nefario: What happened to the ship? It's big again! Not as big as the moon is going to be! Gru: What? Dr. Nefario: The larger the mass of an object, the quicker the effects of the shrink ray wear off! I call it the Nefario Principle. I just came up with it now, actually. Gru: Oh, no! Margo: Did you see that? Girls: Vector! Help! Vector! Over here! Vector: Hey! What are you girls doing back there? Girls: The moon! Watch out! Vector: Ouch! Gru: Get as close in as you can. You got it. Margo: Mr Gru, up here! Agnes and Edith: Mr Gru! Gru: Okay, girls! Girls! You're going to have to jump. Edith: Jump? Are you insane? Gru: Don't worry, I will catch you. Margo: You gave us back! Gru: I know, I know. And it is the worst mistake I ever made. But you have to jump now. Margo: It'll be okay. Gru: Okay, girls. Margo: Jump now! Gru: Margo, I will catch you. And I will never let you go again. Vector: Not so fast! Gru: No! Margo: Let me go! Gru: Margo! I'm coming, Margo. Hang on! I got you.Vector: No! Oh, poop. News Reporter: This time, good triumphs, and the moon has been returned to its rightful place in the sky. But once again, law enforcement is baffled, leaving everyone to wonder, who is this mysterious hero? And what will he do next? Gru: Okay, girls. Time for bed. Edith: Come on! We want a story. Agnes: Three sleepy kittens! Gru: Oh, no! Sorry. That book was accidentally destroyed maliciously. Tonight we are going to read a new book. This one is called One Big Unicorn by... Who wrote this? Me! I wrote it. Look, it's a puppet book! Here, watch this. That's the horn! Agnes: This is gonna be the best book ever! Gru: Not to pat myself on the back, but, yes, it probably will be. Here we go. "One big unicorn, strong and free "thought he was happy as he could be. "Then three little kittens came around "and turned his whole life upside down." Edith: Hey, that one looks like me! Gru: No, what are you talking about? These are kittens! Any relation to persons living or dead is completely coincidental. "They made him laugh. "They made him cry. "He never should have said goodbye. "And now he knows he could never part "from those three little kittens "that changed his heart. "The end." Okay, all right. Good night. Margo: I love you. Gru: I love you, too. No, no! All right. Didn't I get you already? They're very good! Gru's Mom: I'm so proud of you, Son. You've turned out to be a great parent! Just like me. Maybe even better. Gru: No, I'm fine. Go ahead. No, no, no! THE END Hey, Carl! Hey. No, no, no. Me, me, me. John? No, no. Me, me, me. Oh,

poop. Oh, no! Stop! Stop! Hello, I am Gru. Back to work, back to work! Back to…

IS THIS THE ENTIRE FUCKING SCRIPT?