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wen-kexing-apologist · 6 months

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IS BROTHER ANURAK THE ONE ARMED MAN?

OKAY! SO!

I feel like I am teetering on the edge of delulu for this fucking show, but…because I just wrote a post about the Left Hand Path and all the left hand/left side imagery, and because I’m…well, me, and hands in shows are My Jam. When I was watching the promo trailer for Episodes 8-14, I noticed something. I never once saw Brother Anurak’s left arm. So I went to the teaser trailer for the whole show, just to see if it was coincidental that the like 5 seconds total of screen time Brother Anurak had in the Part 2 trailer just happened not to show his left arm…but uh…

Brother Anurak holds his rosary with only his right hand…

And Brother Anurak’s left hand just hangs at his side, rather than resting on his lap like his right hand is doing…

And Brother Anurak is shoving Trin with only his right hand…

And Brother Anurak’s left hand is hidden from view by some books…

And this, naturally, started me thinking about the One Armed Man. We don’t know much about this man, only that lost his left arm in an accident and then engaged in some homosexual and substance use activity, he was arrested and executed. We know that Dan, after losing his lucid dreaming stone, had some sort of dream or vision about this one armed man.

We do not know what purpose he serves to the story yet, we do not know if he is truly evil or just presented that way by the villagers. I mean, if the One Armed Man truly is a wild ghost, the Venerable Monk gave a few theories himself: a) The wild ghosts in the village got angry when the school was built and floating bodies down the water in sacrifice was banned after World War II or b) the wild ghosts take those who ask them for help, and who they like.

And we do not, currently, know the One Armed Man’s identity. Or…do we, cause you see, I was thinking about the fact that in just these trailers alone, I had not seen a single instance of Brother Anurak using his left hand.

And so…I did what any completely reasonable, totally non-obsessed, definitely completely normal human being would do….

…and spent the last few hours watching every single scene that involved Brother Anurak in Episodes 1-7 to see if he ever uses his left hand. (I don’t have photo evidence for all of these because trying to screen shot them all would be impossible but, trust me or you can verify for yourself. I also recognize this is a lot, so you’re welcome to just like, choose at random which ones you read).

Episode 1

Welcoming Dan The first time we meet Brother Anurak is when Dan first steps foot on campus. Anurak is the person who gives Dan the school tour and walks him to class. When Dan arrives, he does the traditional ‘wai’ hands that we have come to expect of any Thai show, that is, he presses the palms of both of his hands together when he says hello. Brother Anurak, whose arms are both tucked behind his back, does not return the ‘wai’ and instead just nods. When Rerng, the groundskeeper, runs in to Dan and Anurak, he does the ‘wai’ hands at Anurak and uh…once again Anurak just nods, he does not return the ‘wai’. When he introduces Rerng to Dan, he gestures at Rerng using only his right hand. Otherwise his hands remain tucked behind his back out of view.

Rescuing Dan from Anan We are introduced to Anan in the locker room where he immediately establishes his Utter Irrepentant Douchebag status and tries to control all the boys. Anan comes in at some point and puts a stop to Anan’s hazing, and you don’t really see his body at all, the camera mostly focuses on close ups, but if you watch closely you can see only his right shoulder moving because he’s gesturing with his right hand. His left shoulder stays relatively still.

Talking to Dan about the Shadow

Brother Anurak has been working with Dan and his mother since Dan was about 7 years old. When Brother Anurak is talking with Dan in his office after his first Shadow dream, you can see Anurak’s left hand stays staunchly at his side, he does everything in this scene with his right hand.

Visiting Dan in the infirmary Dan spent the night in his dorm away from his dorm…the infirmary, after he faints in class. Brother Anurak comes to visit him, and both of his hands are hidden by the bed for the entire scene.

Episode 2

Finding Dan at the lake At the end of Episode 2, Dan collapses near the lake while coming face to face with the Shadow. Anurak and Rerng find Nai and Dan, and Rerng helps Nai carry Dan, Anurak takes the flashlight from Rerng with his right hand and that is his full contribution for Getting Dan Out of There.

Talking to Nai When Brother Anurak is scolding Nai about being off school grounds with Dan, his hands are once again hidden behind his desk, and he only gestures with his right hand.

Visiting Dan in the infirmary → transitions to his office

Brother Anurak is standing on Dan’s right in the infirmary when he wakes up after his collapse at the lake. Once again, Brother Anurak’s hands are hidden behind the bed, so you can’t see them, and then when, out of nowhere, Dan and Anurak are talking in Anurak’s office, his left hand is hidden behind the arm of his chair.

Dan wakes up from his dream

During their office session, Dan is shunted out of his dream and realizes that he has been in teh infirmary the entire time, and was not actually in Brother Anurak’s office at all. What has snapped him out of his dream is Brother Anurak shaking him awake, but… he is only using his right hand.

[Side Note: I am taking careful notice of the fact that Dan’s ability to remain present and conscious in reality seems to slip often when he is in Brother Anurak’s presence. Then again, he also sees the Shadow a bunch when he is around the theater teacher, but I have already looked at his hands, and his left hand is real and he does use it so I at the very least I don’t think he has any relationship to the one armed man.]

Episode 3

Dan, Josh, and Nai are punished for coming back late. At some point, Anurak appears to observe, but not deliver, the caning of Dan, Josh, and Nai for missing curfew after going to see the Venerable Monk. We get a wider shot, which means Anurak’s left hand is visible, but it is held in exactly the same position it always is, and he continues to only gesture with his right hand.

Telling Dan not to wear the ring Brother Anurak runs in to the boys in between classes, and he notices the lucid dreaming stone around Dan’s neck. Anurak reminds him that accessories are not allowed in school, and while standing there, his left hand still in the same position it has always been in, and he only points to Dan’s necklace with his right hand.

Teaching class

Brother Anurak is writing on the white board with his right hand, this in and of itself is not all too suspicious because he could just be right handed, but when turns to face the class, his hands are covered by the students so you can’t see either one of them. He moves to the podium and his left hand, which continues to hang at his side, is hidden behind the podium, so we can’t see his left hand. But he places his right hand on the podium, and whatever brief glimpses of the left hand we see when it peeks out the side of the podium, it is in exactly the same position as it always is.

Episode 4

Grabbing Dan from his room to take him to visit his Dad When Brother Anurak visits Dan and Josh’s room to bring Dan to the hospital to say goodbye to his father, not only is Anurak’s left hand hanging at his side, but he is shot from the right side of his body so any potentially visible part of his left hand is hidden by the open dorm room door.

At the hospital Anurak is standing on Dan’s father’s left hand side, making his left hand visible… in exactly the same position it always is, his fingers never even twitch. When Anurak leaves the room to give Dan some time alone with his father, he uses his right arm to comfort Dan even though his left arm is closer to Dan’s shoulder.

Outside the hospital room, after the flashback to Dan’s homelife Left hand visible, in exactly the same position it always is, cut to talking to Dan outside the hospital room, his left hand is hidden between his legs. We get the best close up we have had of Anurak’s left hand and it is too smooth, and is lacking in any pores or spots, and it’s weirdly shiny. (Unfortunately like the one above, the way my computer works for screenshots, the play bar covers the part of the screen I would need to take a photo of).

Flashback to Anurak talking with Dan’s mother

When we see Anurak interacting with Dan’s mother, because she was his patient, his left hand is visible, still in the same position. AND HOLY SHIT, ANYONE READING THIS, YOU NEED TO GO TO TIME STAMP 18:27 AND WATCH HOW BROTHER ANURAK STANDS UP FROM HIS CHAIR. THAT LEFT HAND IS FUCKING FAKE. IT’S FUCKING FAKE!!! He gives the rosary to Dan’s mother with his right hand.

Dan’s mother’s funeral Anurak is sitting on a bench outside the temple, and we only see him after Dan drops the coin he has leftover from buying ice cream, and it hits Anurak’s right foot. We pan out into a wide shot, and Anurak’s right side is visible. Both his hands are in Anurak’s lap but his right hand is covering his left hand so we can’t actually see it. Then, Dan sits on his left side so we never

Baby!Dan sees the Shadow and Anurak comforts him

Shortly after his mother’s death, Dan wakes up in the middle of the night and sees the Shadow looming over him. He runs screaming from his room, at which point Brother Anurak appears on the stairwell. (What he is doing in their home after Dan’s father accused his mother of sleeping with Brother Anurak, is beyond me but I digress). Brother Anurak’s right arm is hugging Dan while his left arm stays at his side, in the same position it always is

Right before Dan fights his father

Dan’s Father’s funeral Anurak comes up to talk to Dan at his father’s funeral, and as he does he places his right hand on Dan’s shoulder. Left hand? Does nothing, as usual.

Episode 5

Dan confronts Brother Anurak

We get the scene from the trailer where Dan tells Brother Anurak that he thinks Trin was murdered after seeing the visage of Trin’s dead body in the pool. This is one of my favorite instances of the hidden left hand, due to the creative use of binder placement. You get a little bit of skin from Brother Anurak’s right hand because it is further away from the camera, but in the foreground? We are not entitled to see what Anurak’s left hand looks like.

Flashback: Talking to Trin in his office after his Student President Win

After Trin wins the student body president race in a unanimous vote, he is taken first to the Headmaster’s office and then to speak with Brother Anurak about the policies he hopes to institute (read: the traditional systems Trin is hoping to change). Like always, both of Brother Anurak’s hands are initially hidden behind his desk, but as he gets more engaged, more serious about the conversation at hand (haha) he leans forward and he only brings his right hand on the table.

Anurak gets a phone call about Trin’s medical records

I don’t remember if this is the first phone call where Anurak is told that Trin had bipolar, was off his meds, and was treating his bipolar with narcotics, or if this is the second phone call where Anurak is calling an unknown person, angry because he didn’t know how Trin’s medical records got leaked to the press. Either way, and in both cases, he answers the phone with his right hand, and never uses his left.

In his office with Trin’s parents

Trin’s parents (one of whom is an MP) are naturally, pissed that Trin’s medical records got leaked and storms over to the school threatening to sue. Brother Anurak speaks with them in his office, and he offers them tea, using only his right hand, his left isn’t even in frame.

And while he is speaking with Trin’s parents, trying to calm them and sort things out, he once again, only puts his right hand on the table. His left is hidden from view.

In his study, listening to old recordings of his sessions with Trin Anurak is thinking more about Trin, and digs out old files of his using only his right hand to pull the files out of his cabinet. When he sits in his chair to listen to the audio tapes, his left arm settles in to the same position at his side as it always is when he’s in that chair, and he hides the hand very quickly underneath the file folder when he opens it.

Episode 6

Brother Anurak does not have a lot of screen time in Episode 6, but he is at the student org fair where he meets the husband of the homophobic teacher that is sleeping with Anan. And here again, the people he is with all do the ‘wai’ hands, while he just nods.

Episode 7

Taking Dan from the headmaster’s office after Anan beats him up

Dan is the unfortunate victim of Nai’s decision to blackmail Anan, and gets beaten up once again. He and Anan are called in to the Headmaster’s office to talk about what happened as Dan left the Funhouse, when all of a sudden Brother Anurak appears, asking to take Dan away since Dan is under his care. Brother Anurak’s left hand is visible, but it is once again, still held in the same position, and his right hand is the one he is using to place a comforting hand on Dan’s shoulder.

Talking to Dan in his office

We reach the final scene with Brother Anurak in the first half of the show, before the One Armed Man is introduced to the story. And it is, once more, the same deal as it has always been throughout the entire show so far. Brother Anurak’s left hand is sitting at his side, in the same position is has literally never changed from. And then he is gone from the rest of the episode, so we don’t have any visual reminders that he exists while the One Armed Man is being introduced and discussed. I have gone through every scene, I have watched to see if his fingers even twitch. They do not, his left hand, whenever it is in view, never moves. You cannot convince me at this point that Brother Anurak and the One Armed Man aren’t connected somehow. This man does not have an actual left hand.

I do not know if Brother Anurak is the One Armed Man, if he is the scapegoat for the One Armed Man, if he is possessed by, a reincarnation of, or a legitimate ghost of the One Armed Man we learn about at the end of the episode. I do not know what the Shadow is, what it wants, if it is malicious, neutral, or good, I do not know what the ghosts of Trin or those two boys want, who the dead bodies are, what happened at this school. I don’t know any of it, I don’t know if all the pieces of the puzzle we need to figure it out have been revealed yet.

But the one thing I do know, is that Brother Anurak does not have a left hand, and the level of detail that the show has done to both reveal and hide that is truly fucking impressive. Utt Uttsada who plays Anurak is doing a fucking phenomena job. I do not know how much time and effort went in to consciously never moving that arm. Like he has not once, not ever moved it. His shoulder remains completely still, his arm swings precisely as much as someone with no lower limb to control will swing. He has to be wearing some sort of prosthetic glove to keep his hand exactly in place, to make sure that his fingers don’t twitch.

It is so incredibly clever to hide his hand like this. To give us enough glances at his left hand from a distance so we don’t question it. I mean, we see his hand, right? We see it is there, it looks real, and there are so many other things to figure out about what the fuck is going on, that the last thing in our minds is the fact that Brother Anurak never uses his left hand.

Anyway, I don’t even know if this will end up being BL, but I need the entire rest of the BL fandom to deal with the occasional jumpscare and creepy smiles and stares and watch this show, so that I can scream about this with more people. Because holy fucking shit, if this show maintains the quality it has given me with the first half of the story all the way to the end, it might make a last minute grab for Show of the Year for me, with how intentional it has been.

#clown checkpoint #screaming crying throwing up about this show #shadow the series #I NEED MORE PEOPLE TO WATCH THIS FUCKING SHOW IMMEDIATELY #PLEASE #I NEED MORE PEOPLE TO SCREAM ABOUT THIS SHOW WITH #wka long post #singto prachaya #fluke natouch #utt uttsada

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elliespuns · 4 months

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Seeing the whole Joel thing with a Daddy kink reminds me of something else, Ellie being so horny? Like yes I read them because it’s a fanfic😔 but realistically speaking after a victim is hit with SA they can either be easily repulsed by sex or be hyper sexual. I’m sure Ellie didn’t suffer a lot after David & I love how your Drabble captures it after.

Another thing I hate when people say Ellie has so much experience in sex? Like being honest she’s probably only had sex about 2 times because it’s clear she’s had sex before when she got with Dina. Not to sound like a perv but Ellie did have Cat before & suspecting since they were both 17 & dumb teens it’s likely they did it before.

Another thing I really doubt Ellie would be dominant in bed being honest she probably looks like a standing stick bug trying to top you, as much as I love her. (I wanna give her a big fat smooch) yes I am talking about older Ellie & in none of these paragraphs am I talking about 14 year old Ellie-🕸️

ELLIE'S TRAUMA: The thing David did to Ellie was horrible. I still have chills just thinking about it. It definitely took a toll on her. We can see it when the game skips to the spring section (which is already a few months after David) and the deer on the wall awakens some bad memories of the incident in her and she suddenly becomes really sad and distant.

But as you say, I don't think she suffered that much from it (hopefully thanks to the fact he didn't have a chance to actually do any real harm to her). We can also see that it doesn't affect her as a person that she is in Part 2 at all. All she is is because of what happened at the hospital, not because of what happened with David. Of course, she carries it with her everywhere she goes, but after she managed to kill that motherfucker, I believe that her strong personality and bravery helped her to accept it and move on.

There are a lot of fics that capture her trauma after what happened with David, but I think the writers just portray their own trauma through Ellie for they feel close to her because she went through something similar (or the same). Which is okay. It's just not canon for Ellie as we know her. I think she felt bad for a long time after it happened, but I also believe that she was more upset about having to chop the man's face into pieces than about him hovering above her, trying to do things. I guess the fact that he didn't have time to finish what he started caused Ellie to be more 'accepting' of it.

ELLIE'S SEX LIFE Ellie is definitely not as sexually active as many people make her in their fics (again, it's just their way of portraying her as they want her to be). Which, again, is completely okay.

Although there are a few fics that make Ellie be like this and that just doesn't rub me the right way. Whenever I read something like this, I have a feeling I'm reading about someone else. I don't read much of the Ellie x reader thing (mostly because in most of them she is portrayed as a dominant and hypersexual nymph and it's not my thing), but I've read a few.

I have to admit though, that until recently, I always thought that Ellie had her first time with Dina. But when I play the scene in my mind over and over, I can see she's the one pushing Dina down, laying on top of her, feeling confident about 'taking over'. Which wouldn't probably happen if she was completely inexperienced. She knew how to do that already, and she had no other intention than to make it happen.

I also think that she had sex with Cat (and if not sex-sex, they definitely did things together). They must have tried. C'mon, I don't know how old Cat was, but Ellie was 17. That girl was probably having sexual thoughts at 15 already, let alone at 17. I mean... let's not forget she was still a hormonal teenager like everyone else at this age.

And as far as it goes for Ellie being dominant, yeah, I can't see that. She's probably this cute, little lame cookie trying her best to make her girlfriend feel good, always asking things like, "Is that okay?" during her first time or "Does that feel good?" during regular sex. Like, I'm sorry, I just can't see her pushing someone against the wall with words like, "I'm gonna fuck you so hard, you won't be able to walk." Like, no, this is not the Ellie we know.

#oh ellie ellie #the last of us #tlou #ellie williams #ellie tlou #tlou game #the last of us game #the last of us part 1 #tlou part 1 #the last of us part 2 #tlou part 2 #ellie x dina #ellie x cat #dina nolastname #elliespuns answers

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johnnycadeirl · 18 days

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prolly never gunna finish lol!

The Outsiders (Johnny's perspective)

I am Johnny Cade, a 16 year old greaser. I live in Tulsa Oklahoma, and I have my entire life, I have 2 parents, a mom and a dad. Sometimes I wish I didn't have either and then maybe I could be at peace, I could probably live with my pals, too. Ponyboy, Sodapop, and Darry would probably take me in, or Two-Bit if they could. My friends understand the situation at my house, they've saved me from my folks a handful of times. Two-Bit especially, sometimes I feel like I’d be better off dead, my parents sure would like that.. They probably wouldn’t notice for a while anyway since I haven't been going home as often anymore, and when I do.. They either ignore me or beat on me. I usually sleep at the Curtis house, or I stay with Two-Bit from time to time, when I can’t stay with Two or Pony, I sleep in the lot. I’m sure I would have a place with Dally if he didn’t stay at Bucks all the time. He doesn't have the best relationship with his parents either. His dad couldn’t care less about his whereabouts, and state. And we never hear about his mother, or any relatives that he may be able to stay with. He digs okay, so does the rest of my gang. They’re the closest relationships I’ve had to family. I'm smaller, and younger compared to all of them, well.. Except for ponyboy, at least for the age part. Ponyboy is 14 and he has already lost both of his parents in a car accident. I feel absolutely terrible for their entire family, especially Darry.. He’s only 20 and he has to continue raising his 2 kid brothers, he doesn’t usually have issues with Sodapop, but him and Ponyboy have never really gotten along, which got worse after their parents died. It was rough on the rest of the gang too. Mr. and Mrs. Curtis were great people, and they took care of those who didn't have great relationships with their parents.. Me and Dally especially- Dally and Mrs. Curtis were real close, I’m sure their passing was also very hard on him.. Of course, he would NEVER let anyone know that, especially anyone in the gang. He thinks emotions and stuff like that are wastes of time, and he had never done so much as cry in front of any of us. Of course we had seen him angry, he hates the world and almost everything in it. He doesn't seem to hate me though, I’ve never been to sure as to why.. But I love Dally a lot, I love the entire gang a lot. They’re all I’ve got in life, without the gang I have nothing, I AM nothing. I would probably be dead and gone if it weren't for them. Or I’d be in a different state, trying to start a new life, without my parents being there to bug me and hurt me. Maybe there wouldn’t be any “Greasers” or “Socs” there too.. Just people. Normal, plain old people.. Maybe I’d be able to go to church there too.. Me and Ponyboy used to go all the time, we invited Two-Bit, and the rest of the gang once, they caused a pretty dramatic scene.. So we never went again. Ponyboy always talks about living in the country, pretty far 'away from the city.. I don’t think I’d mind the “country life” too much, I’d just need to get used to it for a bit, especially since I’ve never been outside of our neighborhood. Maybe there I’d be considered less stupid. That’s all I’ve ever been called by teachers and my parents. I dunno, maybe I am stupid.. I can really get excited about learning if it’s something I find interesting. Ponyboy has mentioned a book before Gone with the Wind. Maybe in the country Ponyboy would be able to read it to me or something. Ponyboy likes books a lot,

#the outsiders #johnny cade #dallas winston #two bit mathews #steve randle #ponyboy curtis #sodapop curtis #darry curtis

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raayllum · 5 months

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1 - favorite fic you wrote this year. 3 - favorite line/scene you wrote this year. 12 - favorite character to write about this year. 14 - a fic you didn’t expect to write. 21 - most memorable comment/review. And 24 - favorite fic you read this year.

I have no precision on fandom or fic... You are free to choose which fandom. Thus, you may make us discover other universes.

1) favourite fic you wrote this year

Looked through and discovered that I wrote 20 fics this year, which is wild, even if the majority are oneshots so... certainly have my pick an picks for various reasons!

These are the ones, probably:

This Fall Might Just Kill Me is 10.2k of Callum trying and failing to get purified, post-S4, and was one of my favourites and one I return to pretty often for a personal re-read. Very Callum/Rayla centric, some magic worldbuilding, and lots of devotion. Oneshot

Twice as Many Stars is 8.7k of Sir Sparklepuff is an existential horror story, the fic, featuring more religious trauma allegory than expected. Also a oneshot

Teach Me How to Name the Bigger Light a fanon s6 currently of 5 out of roughly 26-30ish chapters, and at 41k and counting. Main characters are Callum, Ezran, Rayla, and Claudia in about that order. It's a lot of fun, and a lot of angst

3) favourite line/scene this year

"If it's not you, it's not anyone" has one of my favourite love / Rayllum confessions I've ever written. I also loved this line from a (now non canon) fic regarding Kpp'Ar's feelings on Callum/people "There are many ways to mend broken things, if you can". I deeply enjoyed Callum threatening Nyx over Rayla's safety in this pre-S5 fic and this piece of description as well: "Callum knelt down in front of her, her cheeks heating as he reached up and pried the shawl away again, looking at the way the scar crept over her shoulder like dark ivy" + this Rayllum passage from "this fall just might kill me" (edit in the link):

“It’s because if I die,” he said, squeezing her hands. “I want you to be the last thing I ever see. And you are good enough, Rayla. You are . I don’t care if you destroy me. I don't care if we make each other better or worse or both. I love you. I’ll fall for you every time. I’ll choose to, I’ll choose you, every time.”

I also really enjoyed writing Callum and Lujanne in "older but just never wiser" because it was interesting to revisit their dynamic now that well, Callum is older, powerful, and much more jaded/angry.

Drabbles wise this Rayllum one has one of my favourite metaphoric uses I've ever been able to pull off and I always love 1) writing messy Ezran and 2) Ezran being a little done with his brother's less than favourable methods, so this one for Ezran's "underhanded" comment for sure

But if I had to pick a singular exchange fic wise, it is of course the end of the Callum and Ezran fight from Ch4 of fanon s6, because it was a line that hurt me so much I was sad the rest of the day, and I also thought of it before writing a decent chunk of the boys' argument, so making sure it felt earned and hit the way I wanted to was very fun if also angsty. I apologize in advance lmao:

Only this time Callum scoffed, peeling away, his green eyes glinting. “Yeah, right.” “I am your king and I forbid you—” “You don’t get to forbid me from doing anything because guess what?” A manic gleam overtook his brother’s face. “I don’t fucking care what you think, nevermind what you fucking decree. I’m freeing Runaan, and that’s final.” “Then you can do it without my help,” Ezran said with a ragged breath. “Because I am not giving you my seal.” Callum stared at him with cold eyes. “Dad would be so disappointed in you.” But this time Ezran was ready for the blow, as he said, “Well at least I called him Dad."

A shameless plug OG fantasy world wise was definitely this lines from my sequel WIP. You can learn more about it/the fantasy world here <3

The Alpha of the Crescents may have worn her old friend’s face and mannerisms, but the girls they’d both been were long dead, just like their families. It was time to finish the job and bury them.

as well as

“Good. Vita willing I won’t live to see your next lives.” “Because seeing you again has been so pleasant,” Jamie muttered.

from book one

12) favourite character to write about this year

Given my above answers it's clearly been Callum, but Ezran has probably been my standout in "teach me how to name the bigger light," easy, even if I think Rayla's POV is going to sneak up on me more and more as the fic goes on, especially once we reach the chapters at the Starscraper. I've also written a somewhat decent amount of Kpp'Ar POV this year, I loved writing Claudia in "twice as many stars" in particular. Everyone? Can I say everyone?

But if I had to pick, Callum. (Non fic wise it's all the OG chosen one kiddos running around, I love 'em.)

14) a fic you didn't expect to write

Many days of angry muttering and half concocted plot points predated "teach me how to name the bigger light" and I am still slightly internally salty about it. However, it does feel good to have one last fanon season foray, especially since it's been four years since the last one, and I've been having a fucking blast, lemme tell you.

21) most memorable comment/review

This is hard because I do cherish every review and kind word I get (as well as anyone who leaves notes in their bookmarks) but there are some standouts. Basically anything from twice as many stars is fair game as well as this review on fanon s6, cause I'm gonna go the typical write route and say the long bois make my day / when readers catch onto the smaller details, that's absolutely my favourite:

@inamindfarfaraway <3 hope you've enjoyed the most recent chapter!

24) favourite fic you read this year

Have already done some TDP fic recs here so I'm gonna focus on what's in my bookmarks for now! I mostly read LOZ or SOC fics when I'm not making my way through TDP backlog, but this one for Six of Crows centreing on Inej and Kaz called High Wire Act stood out to me and I'm really enjoying "for the children we couldn't be" for TDP because it's trio centric and the exact kind of time travel fuckery I like to read.

This is tricky, though, cause I find most often the favourite things I participate in is like, the stuff I write because it's what I want to read and most tailored to my specific tastes? I also just don't read as much fic as I could / have in the past and it's hard to pick Just One Fic, y'know? So cop out answer, maybe, but this is the one!

#thanks for asking #forbidden op lore #a year in review lmao #perlelas #my fic #dragons rambles

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wisecrackingeric-2 · 21 days

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((Redoing this cuz TUMBLR FLAGGED IT DAMNIT))

20 Questions for Fic Authors !!

Thank you S O SOSOSOSOOSSOSO MUCH @sunhatllama & @courtofparrots for tagging me!!!!! :DDD

1. How many works do you have??

36!!

2. What is your AO3 word count??

202,659!!!!!!!!! God fucking damn!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3. What fandoms do you write for??

Just Resident Evil!! :D

4. What are your top 5 fics by Kudos??

1. All You Have To Do Is Ask

2. Your Drunk Words Are Sober Thoughts

3. Leon (Finally) Gets Top Surgery

4. Anemoia

And Love Me Like There’s No Tomorrow in that order!!

5. Do you respond to comments??

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES EVEN IF IT TAKES ME FOREVER I ADORE COMMENTS THEY KEEP ME GOING

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending??

OOOOOUGHH this is hard because I am ALLERGIC to writing angst BXBDHENSJ I don’t know why I just struggle to do it!!!! I always feel too bad for the characters!!!!! But if I HAD to pick I’d proooobably say It Was Only Yesterday for @aquarelacosmica because old age is sad I guess BXNENNEDJ

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending??

Literally all of them HDBEHENDJJ happy endings are guaranteed with all my fics but if I had to chose my favourites, they’d be, in no particular order;

1. Marido

2. Matteo

3. Beautiful Boy

4. New Years

5. I’ll Help You Pray

And 6. Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy!!

8. Do you get hate on fics??

Not so far thank god!! I’ve definitely received WEIRD or overbearing comments but no hate!

9. Do you write smut??

My only NS f W fic is Feeling Loved, and it’s more a piece on Luis’ chronic pain and self esteem after RE4 than it is smut I’d say!! It’s very near and dear to my heart <3

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve written??

I’ve never WRITTEN a crossover HOWEVER I have PLENTY of AU’s in my art tag!!! I’d love to write my Warriors Serennedy AU out someday though!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen??

Nope!!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated??

I’ve actually been asked by somebody before if they could translate my fic one time!!! I don’t remember which it was, but I had to politely decline since I didn’t know the language and wouldn’t be able to crowd control the response, but they were super duper polite and kind about it!!!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before??

I’ve never co-written a fic per se but I’ve definitely had my friends bounce ideas between me and help me with proofreading!!!!! Ily guys <<<<333

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

leans on the suspiciously serennedy-shaped box standing in my room Why do you wanna know?

15. What’s a WIP you’d wanna finish but doubt you ever will??

I have quite a handful that I’ve started but unfortunately lost the momentum for and can’t find it again.

Writing is a lot like art for me- if inspiration strikes I have to do it THEN AND THERE or else I’ll lose the groove for the kind of style/inspo I wanted to do it in, and unfortunately I had to give up quite a few fanfic projects this year to focus on art and also mainly cuz the beginning of this year has been VEEEEEERY tough and I always prioritise my art over writing unfortunately!!

I’m proud of myself for finishing (I’m Just A) Sweet Transvestite though- that one was made through blood sweat and tears :,)

16. What are your writing strengths?

UHHHH NO CLUE!!! I’ve been TOLD it’s how I characterise my characters and how I write dialog, but I think the easiest thing for ME is describing scenes so I dunno!!

17. What are your writing weaknesses??

Can saying ‘everything’ count HFNEHENDJ I’m more of an artist than a writer!! But I think the thing I struggle with the most is stretching out important emotional beats. And also commas.

18. Thoughts on writing dialog in another language??

I do it all the time for Luis so Hell Yeah!!! Thank you Wilfreeeeeeeddd for helpiiiinnngg <<<33

19. First fandom you wrote for??

Also Resident Evil!! Serennedy has a violent chokehold on me

20. Favourite fic you’ve written??

(I’m Just A) Sweet Transvestite !! I am S O proud of myself for finishing it man!!!!! I went through HELL and back writing it and I made something that means a lot to me!!!!!!

Tagging @blveherb , @geddy-leesbian , @leonsbunny , @hamartia-grander , @ugetelynx , @theprestigegirly @mooseonahunt and anyone else who wants to join!! :DD

#ericswriting #serennedy

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edenwolfie · 6 months

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20 questions for fic writer

I was tagged by @naamah-beherit! thanks for the tag, this one was fun!

1. how many works do you have on ao3? 8

2. what’s your total ao3 word count? 897,063 lol

3. what fandoms do you write for? Posted Labyrinth, Star Wars, MDZS & TGCF, and written but not posted for Star Trek, Marvel, SVSSS & Trigun

4. what are your top five fics by kudos? #1: Just say yes (MDZS / Kudos: 10,035) #2: Just say there's nothing holding you back (MDZS / Kudos: 6,024) #3: Sigh No More (Star Wars / Kudos: 5,546) #4: I’m aching and I know you are too (MDZS / Kudos: 4,481) #5: ’Til our compass stands still (TGCF / Kudos: 3,962)

5. do you respond to comments? I do try to as much as I can when posting a fic, but after I've finished fics unless I have something to add or a comment particularly moved me, I tend not to due to it being a little time consuming and repetitive to work through--though all are loved and appreciated beyond words!!

6. what’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? None of them lol. Look upon my collection of fix-it fics and weep (at their fluffy endings)

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Again, all of them, but I think ’Til our compass stands still is the one that makes me smile the most.

8. do you get hate on fics? I have gotten a couple of odd comments, but is very rare.

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind? Oh yeah. The smutty kind? Whatever takes my fancy really, I've posted a lot of my soft shit, but there's definitely some darker/kinkier stuff in the old WIP pile.

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written? Not really one for crossovers, only one I started was for Star Wars/MDZS that I will likely never finish.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen? Good old Sigh No More was one of those fics that was being sold on Amazon amongst a number of other folks fics.

12. have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! My series Just Say Yes has been translated to Russian.

13. have you ever co-written a fic before? No, I have not.

14. what’s your all-time favorite ship? Boy that's a hard one. Probably K/S. They the OG for good reason.

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Honestly, if I actually want to finish it, I will make it happen. I also don't start posting until I am sure I have the whole thing plotted out and can finish it. I have a lot of WIPs, but many are little disconnected scenes I like to play with like Barbies that don't really have Plot and I don't really intend to finish. I suppose if the Wangxian brain took me again, I'd like to finish the WIP titled 'Canon Typical Dubious Consent' fic, but it's a huge mess and would need a lot more coherency to it.

16. what are your writing strengths? I think I'm pretty good with dialogue, character, and plot.

17. what are your writing weaknesses? The bits in between those things, descriptions and such. I also have a penchant for reusing words a lot and repeating myself, though I do try to clean that up in edits lol

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? If it's there for a reason I don't see why not, but I also likely wouldn't do so mainly because I'm not particularly fluent in anything other than English and would worry too much about fucking it up.

19. first fandom you wrote for? Labyrinth on ff.net a thousand years ago

20. favorite fic you’ve ever written? Definitely ’Til our compass stands still, that one is my Baby.

I'm tagging whoever feels like doing it!

#edenwolfie writes #ask meme

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prettyoddfever · 2 years

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Ryan Ross did not write AFYCSO in high school. He had graduated before P!ATD even existed.

it seems like there’s a lot of current misinformation about early P!ATD, so I’m going to run through some of the main points related to Ryan in case that can help...

2004

January – February: 17-year-old Ryan was in his last semester of high school and hadn’t met Brendon yet. The Summer League was busy trying to record some demos – those are the songs that Ryan wrote in high school. He was thinking of calling that demo “Movers and Shakers: Here’s Defeat You Can Dance To.” (I don’t remember ever hearing The Summer League’s songs, but I was getting into the P!ATD fandom in fall 2005 when the Vegas kids who knew Ryan in hs hadn’t been scared away yet. They all said similar things: The Summer League had been trying to sound a bit like Fall Out Boy, Ryan’s singing needed a lot of work, and those songs had nothing in common with the future P!ATD ones). The songs that Ryan would write usually reflected whatever phase he was going through. From what I heard & saw online, he seemed to be a Fall Out Boy fan in 2004 who had previously worked at Hot Topic, had gauges, wore graphic tees, and dyed his hair dark. Apparently The Summer League’s songs matched that phase. I really want to emphasize this: Ryan Ross was a huge Fall Out Boy fan in 2003-2004. The Summer League had even played Chicago Is So Two Years Ago in December 2003 at the Punks Who Saved Christmas show at the Huntridge Theater in Vegas (here’s one news article that’s still up that mentions The Summer League sharing the bill with a few other bands. Ryan mentioned the song name in the comments on his post here). There wasn’t much useful info in The Summer League’s journal entries... it was mostly Ryan’s typical angst that was a not-so-subtle message to a girl lol. But he did post on January 1st “new songs. new friends. new recordings. new year.” He also called his band “League” for short when he was talking about their new tshirts.

side note: I recently saw a screenshot of a current info site that said Ryan started writing AFYCSO when he was 14 lol. Here’s how Ryan described the actual songs he wrote around that age: “They were some pretty terrible songs! I guess we were sort of growing up listening to pop punk and the whole skateboarding scene. So it was sort of very juvenile, very innocent pop punk.” Maybe the current misinformation came from someone who saw a quote from Ryan talking about starting to write his own songs when he was in his early teens, but they somehow didn’t realize that Pet Salamander or The Summer League existed?? (Pet Salamander was the early garage band that played a lot of blink-182 songs as Ryan & Spencer learned their instruments, but Spencer was clear that they hadn’t been a blink-182 cover band like the media later tried to make it seem. For example, he said in fall 2005 that “It wasn’t like a Blink cover band.. it’s just that the first songs [Ryan] and I learned on guitar and drums were Blink songs. We’ve always had our own songs. It’s just that we would play them too.” But I still think it’s sometimes funny to call them a blink-182 cover band just because of how much the media ran with that idea in 2006).

I didn’t see/save a lot of Ryan’s older personal lj entries, but apparently he posted this on April 27th: “when i met pete from fob in november i talked to him and Patrick a while about song writing and music, being in a band, and when they came back in febuary, i went up to pete and said hey pete remember me my names- and right then he goes yea dude ryan i remember you! hows the summer league? i don't know why i thought of this but that really left an impression on me that he would remember my name and face and band after meeting tons of kids in every city and learning a 1000 new names a night. i am horrible with names.” Again, I didn’t see that post for myself, but I thought it was most likely legit based on the people who shared it in 2006.

spring & early summer: Brendon met and joined The Summer League around the time he turned 17, Ryan lived with Spencer towards the end of the school year while his dad was in rehab, Ryan graduated from high school, and the band played some small shows while Ryan was the singer. Calling them “shows” is iffy, though. They said they played places like a party, Brendon’s church, and someone’s backyard this summer. I think the July 18/19-ish show was at Brendon’s church. Paulina talked about being the merch girl at a June 6th show, but idk anything about where that was. The guys said the biggest shows they’d played before they became P!ATD were at a waterpark, a hot dog place called Doggy Style, a bowling alley, and a battle of the bands, but idk how many of those happened before summer 2004. The point is that they were still playing pop-punk songs in public as The Summer League for part of this summer and they even had tshirts for sale that said “The Summer League: Adult Contemporary” (some Vegas kids shared pics of those in the very early Fever era). The guys definitely didn't get their practice space until summer 2004 after Ryan had graduated from high school. (Apparently Ryan also posted on lj on July 2nd: “we moved into our practice room today! lots of good sex could go down in there. that place is 24 hours. and i have the keys. hahahaha. but really it should be cool. i hope. well. maybe”). The band made it very clear in future interviews that being in that practice space & hearing all of the other bands that sounded alike was what inspired them to totally change directions and form the new band of P!ATD together (so Brendon could technically be considered an original member). They stopped playing any type of shows in public after forming the new band, so their claim that Panic! at the Disco had never played a single show before they were signed & recorded their first album was legit. (That phrasing was tricky but it was a brilliant marketing move – there’s more info in this post). I’m not clear on exactly which month they formed P!ATD, but sometime in late July – August would fit with their stories.

Here’s some misc summer stuff that doesn’t have much to do with the band: Ryan went to Warped Tour, saw a FOB show around July 28th, and got his dog Shotgun from the clinic where he worked (I think he maybe worked for Brent’s parents).

August: Ryan posted the first draft of what would become the lyrics for It’s Time to Dance on his livejournal. The band repeatedly explained over the next few years that that was the first song they wrote together as a band (they’re talking about more than just lyrics). They were all 17 at some point while working on that song this fall.

The guys were not all the same age, though! I think that’s where some current confusion might come from. Ryan & Brendon were both 17 in summer 2004 when they got their practice space and formed P!ATD, but Brent & Spencer were only 16 (Spencer turned 17 in September, so he wasn’t 16 for very long either... but it’s still true that part of the band was 16 when they got their practice space and worked on their first song that would eventually be on their first album). Brendon, Spencer, & Brent were still in high school, but Ryan had been in the grade above them and had already graduated. Since the majority of the band members were still in high school throughout the next year while they worked on parts of AFYCSO, it was a quick interview answer (and a good selling point) to say that the guys were a bunch of teenagers in high school when they wrote AFYCSO. Even Jon Walker would later say things like “we were in high school when we wrote our first album,” despite the fact that he was a year older than Ryan and didn’t even meet the band until 2006. The guys just needed to have a group statement in interviews.

Ok so back to August 2004: Ryan turned 18 at the end of the month and started college at UNLV, so they were all dealing with “school” in general as they started getting serious about their new band. (side note: in 2006 Ryan said he’d been studying creative writing, but in 2008 he said he’d been studying music production & engineering. He was barely even there for a semester, so maybe he’s just talking about the various classes he took... I don’t think it’s that big of a deal).

fall / autumn: The band was trying to get fans online instead of irl in Vegas. Brendon was now the band’s singer, they recorded the first demo of It’s Time to Dance as separate parts on a laptop & posted the demo to purevolume in late October, and then Ryan proceeded to spam the internet telling people to check out his band’s song. (Slightly related: I know the main masterpost of Ryan’s personal lj posts that was generated through ljseek in 2006 only goes back to like fall 2004, but that’s def not the full picture. It’s only text and it’s missing a lot of content btw – even from the time period it includes. And this version of the old masterpost of Ryan’s lj comments is missing some stuff, but at least that one’s still up). Anyways, Ryan was just a regular guy trying really hard to promote his band & get anyone’s attention. A lot of his bathroom selfies are from those posts this fall. I’ll just add one here for an example... he’s a freshman in college:

Ryan still lived at home and later said he was having a hard time with his dad this fall, so that factored into some of the earliest P!ATD songs he wrote. The band started to record the “Nails for breakfast and tacks for snacks” demo in early November, that untitled demo was posted on purevolume in mid-November (this is related), and then Ryan posted the lyrics on his lj too (I put them in here). And here’s the related tightpants post too because why not.

The guys later talked about how stressful this season had been as they tried to create a legit band while going to school & their part-time jobs. Ryan said he’d work mornings, go to class in the afternoon, and then practice in the evenings. He was also having a harder time commuting to school, and posted on lj about a parking ticket, a speeding ticket, and getting his car towed while he was in class. The band sounded like they had a lot of pressure from their parents and might have been on the verge of breaking up at this point.

Pete Wentz actually listened to the purevolume link that Ryan pestered him with, posted this on November 28th (you can see Ryan’s reply in the comments), and then emailed Ryan saying he wanted to hear more (Pete said in countless interviews that he wanted to sign them right away). Ryan was still 18 & in college at this point and the other guys were still 17 & in high school.

Brent’s brother Blake was the one who later leaked the supposed transcript of the AIM chat between Ryan & Pete. Blake posted that as a myspace bulletin during the mid-2006 season when he was doing whatever he could to aggressively destroy the band’s image, so I’d definitely take the content there with a grain of salt (even if it seems harmless). I wouldn’t trust anything from Blake... and especially during that season.

Pete Wentz rented a car and drove to Vegas on the weekend of December 3-4 (some people went with him too, like his tour manager Dan Suh). The P!ATD guys didn’t even know how to play their new songs live as a band yet, so they basically played It’s Time to Dance acoustically for Pete over & over in their practice space (here’s more info). They still only had 2 songs on purevolume at this point. Pete told the band he wanted to sign them as they were driving back to his hotel.

A summary of the rest of December: P!ATD got their myspace, the band went to visit Pete in LA (Brendon recorded his vocals for 7 Minutes In Heaven), Ryan dropped out of college, and the guys signed their contracts sometime around the new year (with the help of their parents since 3/4 of them were still underage).

January – June 2005

The band went back to LA in mid-January to visit Pete and record an official demo of “Its Time To dance (cause boys will be boys)” that could be used on samplers. That was posted on purevolume on January 20th (Ryan was the one who kept fans updated... because yeah, the band already had fans thanks to their Fall Out Boy connection). Here’s a comparison of the 2 demos for It’s Time to Dance: the first version is the one that Pete heard in November 2004, and the second one is the January 2005 demo he had them record. I’ve seen a lot of confusion over those demos lately for some reason, so to be clear: the second one is not the demo from fall 2004... it’s the demo that was widely used for promotional stuff in 2005. It was even played on the radio in some towns a bit later that year. That’s the song that I think best represents the 2005 season.

side note: many years after the split Brendon claimed that the band spent 1.5 years in their van… so he was counting the entire time he was in a band with these guys starting in late spring 2004 (regardless of what their band name was or whether they were even playing shows or driving anywhere). The trips to LA to visit Pete are part of that timeframe then. Brent claimed that they’d started recording AFYCSO in January 2005, so that was just the second demo of It’s Time to Dance.

the FBR spring sampler with P!ATD on it started coming out around Valentine’s Day, but P!ATD wasn’t officially announced as a new FBR band until March 15th. This is the picture they were using this spring:

Their FBR & purevolume bio called them a dance rock band and mentioned the line “ambitious and desperate for attention” from one of the songs they were working on. Every band member’s contact info had been listed on purevolume in fall 2004 (their AIM names were “stitchesnwalkers” for Ryan, “screenametaken1″ for Brent, “aboynamedskip” for Brendon, and “twentyninepiecer” for Spencer), but by April 2005 they were only using Ryan’s AIM & band email as P!ATD’s official contact info (Ryan also continued to use his blinkexists182 email throughout the Fever era). The Relax Relapse demo was on purevolume by April too.

Pete Wentz obvs had a big fanbase, so the online hate towards P!ATD had already started (because they didn’t “deserve” to be signed and hadn’t “paid their dues” etc etc). Ryan said that “Rather than going to all these boards and writing what I thought, I just put it in the songs.”

During the Fever era the band talked about how much pressure they had been under in spring 2005 when everyone expected them to just come up with an album. However, by 2008 they had a much different perspective and Ryan was making comments about the first album like “we had ample time to write… we had no pressure and all we wanted to do was to put our music out there.” During 2007-2008 they talked about how they were pretty much unknown in 2005 and didn’t have an established sound or image, so there weren’t many expectations in comparison with where the band was at while writing the second album. So everything is relative, but the point is that in spring 2005 the guys still seemed to feel some pressure.

It sounded like a lot of the stress this spring came from their personal lives too. This quote from Ryan sums up a lot of what he said in countless Fever-era interviews (this is from the spring 2006 Alt Press cover article that had a lot of errors from the journalist btw, so I’m only referencing Ryan’s direct quotes):

“When I told my dad after the first semester that I was going to quit college and write a record, he was not very pleased. He definitely threatened to take everything away. I was on the verge of getting kicked out because of that decision… I’d be completely angry with him about wanting to kick me out of the house, but then I’d have to make sure he was ok and take care of him. I’d… try to get him back to being sober, and [it would be] like he forgot all about what I just did for him and go right back to wanting to kick me out. There were definitely a lot of fights, and he was in and out of the hospital a lot that year. There’d be times where I’d be gone doing something for the band, I’d come home and he wasn’t there. There’d be a message on the machine from the hospital, saying that he was there and to come see him. There was a ton going on in my life, all while trying to write a record.”

I don’t think Brendon actually got an apartment this spring, so I wouldn’t jump to conclusions that Ryan stayed with him in a hypothetical apartment (even if that’s a nice story).

Ryan’s girlfriend cheated on him around late spring 2005, which led to a lot of inspiration and a shift in the focus/tone of several song drafts that Ryan wrote after that (notice how 2/3 of the band’s official demos so far had focused on Ryan’s struggles with his dad). The early lyrics for Build God were shared in May.

The band said they needed to wait until Brendon had graduated from high school before they could leave for Maryland to record AFYCSO (Brendon also explained the same thing on lj). They left on June 13th and drove across the country in their van. The sleepover pics were from around this time btw.

Ryan briefly got back together with the girl who cheated on him.

THE LAST HALF OF 2005

Some writing had definitely happened that spring, but Ryan made it clear in Fever-era interviews that he also wrote part of the songs for AFYCSO that summer in the studio. The exact number of song drafts that the guys brought to Maryland changed depending on the interview, but they usually said they had 3-7 drafts ready for Matt Squire to look at (although Ryan said a couple times that he only had a few songs before working with Matt). AFYCSO as we know it definitely wouldn’t exist without Matt Squire as the producer... all 4 band members gave him a ton of credit too. Spencer said in fall 2005 that “As far as the recording goes, all credit goes to Matt Squire. He really helped piece this together.” Brendon said “I love that guy… He had so many good ideas that fit perfectly. I should say we had pieces of songs and put them together. We had seven or eight full songs, and then he edited every single one of them. He really helped us out with some ideas.” Brent said “Also, pre-production – I can’t even say how much he helped us structure those songs and turned them into real songs and gave us a direction. We went in there with 5 solid songs but then we had other songs that were just kind of pieces… that guy – he’s a genius. He really is.” Ryan wrote some amazing lyrics, but Matt Squire absolutely deserves credit for the end result too.

Ryan said in a summer 2006 interview that “we wrote Fever in three months and recorded it in a month.” That timeframe lined up with other interview quotes and everything the band shared online while the events were unfolding. They mainly wrote AFYCSO in spring & summer 2005. Ryan turned 19 several weeks after the band left the studio, so he was 18 for the writing process of the first album.

The band explained several times that the verses for IWSNT were written a day before Brendon had to sing them since the guys had to be done in the studio a couple days later. Brendon also told Hearts & Sleeves in early 2006 that “A lot of the second half [of the album] was written in the studio and recorded in like the last five days. So that was really tough. We were stressing out pretty bad. We didnʼt have some songs written. We still didnʼt get to do some - a couple ideas that we had but that was just due to a lack of time.”

Ryan wrote the lyrics, but all four guys helped create the overall songs. Ryan talked to Helio at the end of the Fever era about the songwriting process for the first album: “when I had a little bit of the music and lyrics finished, I would bring it to Spencer and Brendon and we would all finish the songs together.” The band’s approach to songwriting varied for each song, though. Sometimes Brendon came up with music to fit the lyrics, sometimes it was a group effort, sometimes the lyrics were written first, sometimes the music was written first, etc. There’s more info in this post about recording AFYCSO. The sound of AFYCSO was a reflection of the different musical interests of all four band members (plus Matt Squire’s advice).

Ryan called into DJ Rossstar’s Punk Rock Show on June 30th and fans could submit questions through AIM or online (speaking of which, there was definitely a decent sized fanbase following the band’s time in the studio).

Spencer introduced Ryan to the Beatles this summer in the studio (I think that Spencer might have specifically pointed out the strings/cello in Eleanor Rigby in early July too... but that’s just my own guess). Brendon’s livejournal entry on July 3rd had the title “I look at all the lonely people.” Ryan later named Eleanor Rigby as a song that changed his life. He also said “I started really getting into The Beatles when we were recording [AFYCSO]. Our drummer, Spencer, started playing me some of their stuff.” This is part of why it was so fun to see the band end the Fever era with their own cover of Eleanor Rigby.

Ryan and Brendon didn’t know each other super well yet. Their fighting really got going this summer as they tried to figure out how to work together. Both guys talked a lot about how they were at each other’s throats this summer because Ryan wanted Brendon to deliver each line a very specific way, but Ryan wasn’t able to sing well enough yet to explain what was in his head to Brendon... and Brendon couldn’t read minds. (This post gets more into why Ryan wanted Brendon to front the early band). It wasn’t hard to spot that this general source of conflict was never fully resolved. Basically, Ryan needed creative control and wanted things done exactly the way he envisioned them, but Brendon was never going to be a precise extension of Ryan... and that wasn’t a healthy long-term setup for either guy. They both talked during the early Fever era about their challenges in navigating their work relationship (which is different from their friendship). They would mention the previous fighting and then claim that they were getting along better now, but then a few months later they’d reveal that some of the same conflict had still been happening but apparently now they had learned how to work together. That pattern continued. Ryan told The Miami Herald towards the end of the Fever era that “it was really frustrating at times, too, trying to get across to [Brendon] how I wanted a part to sound or how I wanted it to come across emotionally. We’re still trying to find that balance of understanding each other.” Spoiler alert: they did not find that balance in 2007 lol. (This is definitely not context for the spilt btw... it’s barely scratching the surface of all the creative differences that grew between them. I’m just saying that they did their best to make this early setup work when it was necessary).

Matt Squire had a degree in psychology, which I think probably helped this summer lol.

The Daily Telegraph had a funny quote from Ryan about how this summer went: “We were making things up in our heads that weren't there, and on top of the stress of trying to finish the record, we were living in a one-bedroom apartment with four people on bunk beds. Everyone got on everybody's nerves. Someone would write a new part for a song and someone else would say they didn't like it just because you ate their cereal that morning.”

Spencer & Brent were still 17 while the band recorded AFYCSO. The band sometimes focused on that number in interviews because it made them sound younger to say “we were 17 when we made our first record.” Ryan & Brendon were 18, though!

The band’s first tour with Acceptance was announced in July. The guys left Maryland around the third week of July to head back to Vegas. Then they had a couple weeks to literally learn how to be a band and play their songs live.

Their first show was on August 12th at The Alley in Vegas. They played their second show in Ohio en route to the east coast to join the Take Cover Tour. So their third show ever (as Panic! at the Disco) was on a national tour opening for Acceptance.

Ryan would have been starting his sophomore year of college at the point when the band started touring (if he hadn’t dropped out of school).

Ryan turned 19 at the end of August. Spencer was still 17 when the band started touring, but then he turned 18 in September. Brent & Brendon were also 18 during this first tour.

Ok now the Fever era had started, so I’ll kind of wind down here. These selfies were from late 2005 btw (not high school). Ryan is 19 here:

Ryan started dating Jac around Halloween 2005 (they’d been flirting on lj for over a year) and Brendon met Audrey around that point. Those relationships were really short-lived... they lasted for like 4 months and the guys were on tour for a good chunk of that time. Audrey & Jac took a ton of pictures, though, so maybe that’s why their presence could seem more significant these days? Both Brendon & Ryan had other girlfriends in 2006 who were around longer.

The band was out of their van at the end of 2005. And they were getting really big super fast (like they should not have been opening for TAI in early 2006 – that wasn’t fair to the headlining band).

Ryan wasn’t in high school at any point while he was in P!ATD. I’ve seen a couple fans these days who think that Ryan was like 17 years old in pictures from spring 2006... but those same fans still seem to understand that Ryan’s 21st birthday was in 2007 (so idk how their math works).

Ryan just looked really young in early 2006. He was actually half a year away from turning 20 here:

He wasn’t a teenager during the Nothing Rhymes With Circus Tour either... he was 20 years old and would have been in his junior year of college.

Also, I think the fact that there are a ton of pictures from certain seasons might make it feel like those things happened for a longer period of time than they actually did (ex: Brendon only wore the lavender hoodie for a few weeks in summer 2006). Ryan wore dramatic stage makeup during parts of June–December 2006 and then he was totally over it. He made several comments during the Pretty. Odd. era that were pretty discounting of that phase of his life (and made me feel silly for ever loving it). But I did appreciate how Ryan went through a lot of phases while he was in the band, fully embraced each one while he was in it, and then could totally drop it as he moved forward & kept building on his interests.

Ok I’ll just stop now before this post gets even longer. The point is that Ryan Ross was not in high school when he wrote AFYCSO, but the other band members were. The end.

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corvarrow · 6 months

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Alright, I couldn't decide how to best present my thoughts about this art challenge, so here's just a summary screenshot to start with - if you would like to see the big versions with the lore you can check out my tag, and the actual list itself is here!

And without further ado, here are my thoughts on this art challenge and finishing it!

Things that helped me finish the challenge

Taking a break day (or two) a week – I have a day job so this was absolutely required to not burn out, lol

Having a theme – This was nor originally intentional, but keeping it worldbuilding related really helped me come up with ideas as there were several prompts where I was just coming up with nothing otherwise.

Small canvas size – These are all fairly small - it was a 6x6 pad. Originally thought it was going to be too small, but ended up being perfect. Since I opted to do full blown scenes I don’t think I would have finished otherwise

Limited Palette/Materials – I learned this from completing previous challenges, but the fewer decisions I have to make the easier it is to do these. This one happened to actually be ink (see materials section) but I have done challenge before with like, "single set of markers"

Displaying the Art – I didn’t like having a loose stack of completed pictures, so I bought a 6x6 photo album to store them in. This was a great decision as they look very cool in there I was very motivated to complete the set

Completion Stickers - Yes, I am 2 years old. I had a paper list where I was putting stickers next to each word as I completed it, and it was very satisfying >_>a

Stuff I liked

Able to practice a medium - Yeah by the end I was feeling way more confident with ink and different techniques (wet on wet, wet on dry, etc)

Got to practice scenes and lighting – I even fit in a ton of OC cameos

Posted all pieces regardless of quality - Although this was not my first list-based challenge it is the first one I posted ALL pieces for

Got some fun pieces to revisit later - There are quite a few I REALLY like for different reasons so it would be fun to do them again later, but spend more time

Kept a consistent quality for the whole challenge - It was tempting to "get lazy" at the end but I think I managed to keep the same general quality the entire time

Used up a bunch of pages in a sketchbook I’m not overly fond of by doing tons of thumbnails - To be quite honest, if I have a sketchbook I hate enough (because the paper is bad or whatever) I will often uh, dismantle them. 8Da; I am not overly fond of the one I'm currently using, but now there's only about 14 pages left so, I will persevere.

Stuff I didn’t like

Time commitment required - Even with the breaks, I was spending almost all evening for 5 weeks working on these, which was a little Much for me. I will have to rethink my approach to any future challenges.

Using WIP designs/Not being able to spend a lot of time on anything – There’s a couple pieces where I wanted to go a certain direction and had to go with Vibes rather than accuracy for the sake of getting it done….which is fine, some of them turned out nice regardless. However would have still liked to hammer things out a little more.

Materials Used

Artsnacks Inktober Box, with some modifications - Something you should know about Artsnacks, is that often the colored materials will be the brand shown, but the color you actually receive will be random. Luckily, I got an Orange ink. Unfortunately, I also have terrible luck with PH Martin’s Orange in that it always separates no matter how much I mix it, so partway through the challenge I replaced it with a Daler Rowney Flame Orange Ink. This is a VERY similar ink, the only difference I really saw was that when diluted a lot it leaned more yellow. Additionally I did not use the blue Faber Castel Pitt pen in the box. TECHNICALLY I could have made green for all those plant pictures, but I refused for the sake of keeping a cohesive Black/Orange color scheme

Ranger Craft-It! Heat Gun - I would not have been able to finish had I not been able to speed up the drying time with this thing, it is the best

Lots of background noise - My noise of choice was a mix between scary cave and cave diving stories, as well as the White Vault podcast, which is a fictional horror audio drama

Bonus Round: Number of OC Appearances

Tower: x4

Torch: x4 (one of them in his plantbeast form)

Cavi: x3

Mady: x1 (also the only non-sion in this list)

Team "New/WIP OCs" -

Aki: x5 (one of them as a doll)

Jas: x2

Aki's sibling (final name pending): x1 (as a statue)

#cvlostkingdoms #art challenge #art challenge thoughts #long post #my art #ink art #art thoughts

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wanderlust-in-my-soul · 2 years

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Currently watching

June 2022

KinnPorsche (13/14)

Discover me, absolutely pulled into the world of KinnPorsche and every week amazed at how the show manages to not only surprise and emotionally devastate us all (positively and negatively), but also convince us all again week after week that next week VegasPete will finally start - instead we get Vegas who tries to make VegasPorsche real...

Dear Doctor, I’m Coming for Soul (12/12)

Discover a doctor who apparently has never heard that people must die and who tries every week anew to protect people from the evil but in his black suit very attractive Soul Reaper and who finally found the courage to kiss his beautiful reaper before this one disappeared into the underworld.

Fukou-kun wa Kiss Suru Shikanai! (8/8)

Discover a colourful world where an unlucky guy and a fortunate guy balance each other out, while the unlucky guy is a wonderful anime character come to life, full of bubbly energy and inward dialogue directed outward, and the fortunate guy is a reserved and quiet young man who reminds me a hell of a lot of Jungkook from BTS

– I really enjoy this one, it is full of life and the story is sweet.

Plus & Minus (12/12)

Discover how two best friends, who have known each other since childhood, have never spent a moment without the other, kiss when they drunkenly fall onto each other and finally told each other about their feelings and now are a cute couple with problems...alongside there is a gooey side couple who go from zero to a hundred in a matter of moments – still kind of intrigued with the main couple, not the side dish

That’s my candy (3/6)

Discover a long-term relationship where kisses are apparently not normal and you still have to be shy about it after three years of dating - I have made it to episode two after one month and I still think it is bad.

Dark Blue and Moonlight (3/12)

Discover a series where everyone cheats with everyone else.

My Secret Love (5/12)

Discover how the cool and the reasonable, who of course can't stand each other, are forced to form a BL Couple, only to find out that maybe they do like each other and everything is topped with accidental kisses and silly pranks. And we have a secret but established couple, which is nice to see.

Star and Sky: Sky in your heart (5/8)

Discover a setting and a story reminiscent of A tale of thousand stars, but a little different and with great chemistry between the two protagonists so far - Prince is just pure sugar.

To my Star 2 (10/10)

Discover heartbreak and pain!

History 3: Trapped (10/10)

Discover a world where a cop can spy on a mafia boss without being killed by him, even become his bodyguard, and in the end they fell in love with each other. I am delighted.

Oxygen (13/13)

Discover when the worlds of two people collide and we can watch them falling in love with each other while one side couple is really cute and the other I don't really understand, yet.

Check Out (4/12)

Discover Daonuea and Nine's story, which is supposed to be so sexual that youtube has refused to broadcast it even with a paid subscription...

Mama Gogo (2/10)

Discover how I'm going to wallow in secondhand embarrassment with every episode.

2 Moons 2 (12/12)

Discover a Uni-BL, nothing new, just something sweet and cringey, but sometimes I need things like that.

Update after finishing it: It would have been an 8 or 9 for me, if KitMing or ForthBeam were the main couple, especially ForthBeam, I love them!

Be loved in house: I do (13/13)

Discover a drama so great (at least in my opinion) that I can't say anything negative about it.

Love Mechanics (4/10)

Discover me becoming obsessed about Vee and Mark...

Old Fashion Cupcake (4/5)

Discover a story about learning that you are never too old to enjoy life and have fun with it, and maybe along the way fall in love with someone you never expected. This series gives me so much hope!

Unforgotten Night (2/12)

Discover...a cringe fest with spicy dialogues, sympathetic characters, gorgeous sex scenes and of course a non-existing plot. Love it!

Senpai, Danjite Koidewa! (2/8)

Discover the sweet lovestory about two collegues falling in love with each other.

He's coming to me (8/8)

Discover a wholesome and beautiful lovestory with some supernatural elements. Grab yourself some tissues and dive into this beauty! It is so worth it!

Theory of love (12/12)

Discover one of the most iconic shower scenes I ever saw on my screen. And can I say that I don't like Khai without everyone hating me?

Together with me (13/13)

Discover two muscular men on their journey to themselves and to each other.

Color Rush 2 (8/8)

Discover me being disappointed...but not really surprised by it.

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maerenee930 · 10 months

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stupid and random things that popped into my head/that happened and made me laugh/giggle at work recently (to myself 😅) and that i thought i would share -

1. “derbel mcdillet” - nothing else with this, literally just bill hader’s voice in my head saying this 😂 (it’s just so funny and stupid. it makes me laugh every time i think about it. 😂)

2. “You look familiar.” - “Like your dead girlfriend?” 😳😂 - no other part of the song at first, just that specific part randomly popping into my head throughout the day 😅🤦‍♀️ (idk why but that line and the way rosario dawson says it just kills me. it has since i was like 14 lol)

3. “wait, am i dello or donna?” - young donald duck (from the newer ducktales) asking his sister (della) this after scrooge mixes up their names and is calling them to go on an adventure with him. 😂 (i don’t know why this made me laugh so hard, but it did. i think it was the voice too that just made it even better lol.)

(there’s more under the cut 😅 i figure i wrote a lot and don’t wanna make anyone have to scroll through all of this especially if they’re not like all that interested in all this randomness and stupidity lol. which i totally get 😂 my brain is something else lmao. and it’s not for everyone 😅)

4. steve rogers during the schwarma scene in a angers. just how he sits and and his facial expression- it just makes me giggle. he’s just so cute and adorable 😄 and cause it’s so relatable. like for real, it’s me pretty much all the time lmao.

5. telling one of my coworkers a story about my aunt (my mom’s oldest sister/the one i work with) from when she was a like 3 or 4 (i think i’m not 100% sure atm. but i do know she was very young) and she and my grandparents had moved back to italy. and one time when they (my grandparents and aunt) went to a relative’s house and she told the one of the relatives who lived there that “her mom’s house back in america was never this dirty” 😂 the sass!! like i just love it so much!

6. me thinking about when i was a kid and go swimming in our pool, we would have to keep our distance from my mom if she was also in the pool because she hated being splashed. (i mean i get it lol, it can be very annoying. especially when the water is cold lol) and one day my brother kept splashing her on purpose (which was very out of character for him cause of the two of us, he was the good one. he was the one who stayed out of trouble lol). so she asked him to stop nicely and then progressively got more frustrated with him when he didn’t stop. so then finally he did stop. but then, he genuinely on accident splashed her again and she turned to him and says “look here you little fucker” 😂 which wasn’t like our mom lol. she didn’t like swear at us when we were kids unless we made her really mad lol.

7. “you swore on my face” - me when i was maybe 3 years old. i did something (i got into trouble/cause trouble quite a bit when i was that small lol) and she called me a little shit. shocked and very offended by my mother not only calling me that but for swearing (again, she didn’t normally swear at us lol. it was rare that she did and that’s why it was kind of a big deal when she actually did lol. but now, she swears like a sailor lmao. and i absolutely take after her and get that from her 😅😂)

8. “you fuhting kidding me?” - my bruceman 🖤 when i was still his nanny, he used to say this all the time lol. and the very first time he said it, it was one morning when he was eating breakfast and while his parents were getting ready for work/not too long before i got to their house to spend the day with my little dude. and so his mom asked his dad if he let their dog back in yet (or tried to get her to come in. she reeeeally loves being outside 😄 i miss her 🥺😢 anywayy…). he told her no, not yet. and before he could say anything else, my buddy looked over at his dad while standing on his chair at their kitchen table so he could see him better and very annoyed says “ugh, you fuhting kidding me?!” 😂 i couldn’t believe it when they told me he said that lmao! i mean it didn’t surprise me that he swore, he did that on and off quite a bit lol. but the fact that this (at the time) 3 year old little shit used it correctly! too perfect and too funny. we (my family and i) say it all the time now. (this happened back in 2020 lol)

- there are sooo many other random and stupid little things i think about during the day or things that happen to me while i’m at work (i realize i didn’t really mention anything that like actually happened to me. but i figure i can always add some moments like that on here another time lol) but for now i’ll post this as it is and i’ll update this with more stuff soon lol.

#random thoughts #derbel mcdillet #bill hader #bill hader snl #rent #musical #rosario dawson #disney #ducktales #donald duck #della duck #scrooge mcduck #uncle scrooge #steve rogers #that’s america’s ass #welcome to my brain #idk lmao

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dewdropreader · 2 years

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Hello! I’ve been tagged by @queen-of-meows and @bushs-world !!! Thank you so much for thinking of me, I definitely smiled like mad when I saw what I was tagged in!

I’m a few days late on posting these full answers, but I hope you enjoy hearing about all this! And if you have comments or questions I’m always open for those too!

- How long have you been writing fanfiction?

On and off since I was about 13-14 (about 10 years!) I wrote fics on an old account from when I was maybe 13 until I was 16 or so, then I fell off of it and didn’t write any for years. Something about the Loki TV show sparked my desire to try again though, so I jumped back in with this account in I think February of this year? I’ve done plenty of non fic writing in that time but I’m very happy to have found a passion for fics again (especially now that I have better writing skills than my teenage self lol)

- Do you have a favorite word? (One that you love. Doesn’t necessarily have to be one you use all the time.)

I’m sure I have a lot of others I’m forgetting but I like the word shenanigans 😂 both in real life and the rare times I get to use it in fics.

- Share a favorite run-on sentence that you’ve written.

I’m not sure if it’s the overall favorite (because despite my attempts to edit them down I am a fiend about including run-ons especially in character study type fics with lots of monologues or inner thoughts) but I really like this moment from the end of Blossoming with Frigga hugging Loki.

“So, she settles on pulling him in for another hug, this time being deliberate in the way she pulls him against her and holds him tight, wanting to imbue every bit of love she has for him into the fibers of his soul, so he can never forget, no matter what the world throws at him.”

- Share a bit of a scene that you’ve written that still gives you FEELS.

So I have a few I like that I feel pack the feels punch for me especially (because so much of what I write is self indulgent in what gives me feels 😅), but these two are some of the most feelsy to me!

The first is actually from With You Through the Storms, in chapter 2. The entire section about Loki accidentally breaking the vase and reacting with panic and fear that he’d be punished hurt to write, and there’s a lot more than this section but this scene/moment was one of the first things I thought of when planning this chapter and it stuck in my brain.

“It doesn’t require thanks, Loki,” Mobius whispers. Loki feels a soft, tentative hand on his knee. “You deserve kindness from anyone and everyone, not just me. I’m sorry that hasn’t been the case.”

Loki’s throat tightens and the tears start to overflow against his wishes. He sucks in a breath that’s almost a hiccup and squeezes his eyes shut. Without thinking, he closes the final bit of distance between him and Mobius and drops himself sideways against him, his head falling against Mobius’ shoulder.

Without even a beat of hesitation, Mobius wraps an arm around him and holds him close. Loki lets out another small sob, trying to keep it contained and failing miserably. Mobius wraps his other arm around him and scoots closer, until they are tucked together, Loki’s face turned into Mobius’ collarbone. Loki feels Mobius’ fingers tangling into his hair, something Mobius has clearly realized that Loki likes (not that he’s been particularly subtle about it) due to how often he is found doing it. Loki presses tighter into Mobius’ body, if that’s possible, and Mobius never pulls away or stills in discomfort, he just adjusts so Loki can be comfortable and holds him close. After a while, Loki feels Mobius’ head rest gently upon his own, and gentle lips press a slow kiss to his hair. “It’s okay, Loki. I’m here.”

The second is from Valediction, still to date the saddest fic I think I’ve ever written and maybe ever will, because it doesn’t have a truly happy ending. There’s some bittersweet moments in Valhalla in chapter 2, but it focuses on Mobius visiting the body of Sacred Timeline Loki to give him a proper send off despite this Loki not knowing him. ST Loki’s death always gives me such a pit in my stomach and this was my way of trying to work with the feels.

But Mobius is still struck with these endless thoughts. Why is it fair that Loki died here, now, like this? Mobius can’t explain why he feels the unfairness so strongly with Loki, he knows that beings die all the time, even on the sacred timeline. They even die young, as young or younger than Loki was, relatively speaking. Mobius isn’t sure why the unfairness festers within him, other than because of his incredible fondness for Lokis. And maybe that’s enough.

He just knows that his heart aches.

His thumb smooths over Loki’s rapidly cooling hand. He hopes that if some remnant of Loki’s soul, of his magic, of anything, remains within him still, that it picks up on the warmth of his body. He wants, so desperately, for Loki to not be alone.

-What is your favorite kind of character interaction to write?

Anything soft and cathartic! Things like hugs when one person is upset, snuggles, gentle touches, characters speaking kindly and giving praise to someone they love, reunions, all of that! Anything that allows characters to feel the love they need/want, really!

- Do you have a hyper-specific genre?/ Any personal or frequently used tags?

More generically I use “hurt/comfort” and “emotional hurt/comfort in I think all but maybe 1-2 of my fics, I use “fluff” and “domestic fluff” a lot as well!

For a bit more specific I use “found family” and related tags frequently, even outside of my dedicated Loki Found Family series I write those dynamics a lot! I also have used “Classic Loki Lives” many times, I’m not the only one but a chunk of the fandom has decided to just say “no” to him being dead, and I very often use variations of “x character needs a hug” and “x character gets a hug” for a lot of characters!

- Share a joke or funny moment that you’ve written that still makes you laugh.

It’s not quite laugh out loud funny but I adore all of the banter and goofiness in Love and it always make me grin like a fool! These two moments are my fave:

“Well, if love is not an imaginary dagger, what is it? Did you ever decide?” Mobius asks, throwing one arm around Sylvie’s shoulders and using the other to rake fingers through Loki’s long hair.

“We got thrown off the train before we could.” Sylvie looks pointedly at Loki, but there’s no lingering malice.

“You did have some gems earlier on. Oh, what was it? Love is hate?” Loki teases, his eyes glimmering like he’s challenging her.

“Sure hope you don’t still think that.” Mobius jokes, giving her a lopsided smile. She bumps his shoulder and gives him a quick but sloppy peck on the cheek, shaking her head.

“Or, what else, love is mischief? Loki replies.

“Well, that one may be true.” Mobius shrugs, looking fondly at Loki.

And:

Mobius turns his face towards Loki when he feels his large hand pat his face. He opens his mouth to speak, but Loki’s hand falls away just as quickly, and he lets out a guttural snore.

Mobius and Sylvie glance at each other, then burst into giggles. They stifle them as quickly as they can, Sylvie turning her face into Mobius’ shoulder, her nose squashing against him.

- Best editing tip?

I’m using the same one as @insert-witty-user-name-here because it’s absolutely the one I agree with most: Read your own work! Read and reread it. My process is usually reading through certain sections as I write, then when I’ve written a draft of the whole thing I go through and read for errors/changes (often multiple times, but it depends on the piece!) Once it’s at a point I am ready to publish, I try to read it as a reader rather than a writer, sometimes I have to wait a few days or a week for it to be far enough out of my brain to do that, and it isn’t always perfect, but often then I either notice little things I can fix if needed, or more importantly I can appreciate what I’ve done and take the skills/appreciation from that piece to help me in the future!

- What drives you to write?

Broadly the biggest things are catharsis and self indulgence. That sounds rather dramatic writing it out lol, but what I mean is that I really like writing things that either help me understand the characters better, give the characters the stories and endings and experiences I want for them, and/or to write characters/moments that resonate for me, and sometimes those things help me work through my own feelings on things. First and foremost I write for fun, but the content of my fics often stems from the things mentioned above!

- Where do you draw inspiration?

All over! I personally like people watching so sometimes little things will stick with me. Often I like to rewatch the core show (in the case of Loki) because rewatching often shows me different things or I just happen to think about something more one day and that sparks ideas. Similarly even just looking at fanart or reading other fics really reminds me what I love about this show and characters! Also often when I listen to music or even consume other media, I’ll make connections between it and the characters and it can spark ideas!

- What is your biggest challenge in writing?

I definitely think I’ve gotten better with time but historically I’ve struggled with both dialogue and humor writing! I’ve gotten to practice more with all the banter and mischief with the Loki characters, but it still doesn’t quite come as smoothly so I still always worry if it things are clever enough, natural enough, in character, etc!

- What is your immediate reaction when you receive a new comment on a fic?

It may sound cheesy/exaggerated but it legitimately makes my whole day! (And often beyond! My sign off on fics is always that it makes my day, week, and month and that’s true! I always think back to comments even past when I see and reply!) From the quickest notes that someone enjoyed it to the most in depth, kind reviews, all of it brings me so much joy! While I of course write things I want to write, people responding to my work is what keeps me posting rather than just writing purely for myself and keeping it private. I will honestly read a comment and think about it randomly later on that day or week and end up with a huge smile!

- 1-2 sentence preview from your current WIP?? (Only if you are willing.)

This is from chapter 3 of the Loki cat fic (With You Through the Storms). I just wrote this earlier today, it may stay as is or get moved around!

They’ve continued the bed sharing with no further discussions.

While Mobius is usually insistent on open lines of communication, with this it feels like none of that is necessary.

Loki has curled up at his side every night since they first tried it, he no longer hesitates or gives him those nervous sidelong glances. He just curls under the plush comforter, lets out a contented yet weary sigh, and tucks his head forward where it is in the perfect position for Mobius’ hand to rest and tangle in his curls. Occasionally Mobius will hear a soft “night, Mobi…” before Loki drifts off, but sometimes he doesn’t even make it that far before he is passed out.

- What story or scene are you most proud of?

In the least narcissistic way possible I’m proud of a lot of my work (mostly because if I’m unsure of something or I’m not proud of it it festers as a WIP until I can rework it into something I’m proud to publish) but I think my favorites and ones I’m absolutely most proud of would be Every Part of You (Mobius being self conscious and recieving praise and adoration/worship from Loki) and my ongoing fic With You Through the Storms (AU of Loki being a scared cat when Mobius finds him and them growing close first as cat and person and then as people when the truth comes out!)

I so enjoyed doing this! And thank you again for tagging me y’all!

Also, here is my profile:

https://archiveofourown.org/users/DewdropReader/pseuds/DewdropReader

#fanfic #fanfiction #ao3 link #archive of our own #ao3 author #unconventional writer ask #tagged #tag game #fic writing #loki #loki tv #lokius #loki laufeyson #mobius m mobius #sylvie laufeydottir #mcu sylvie #sylkius

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thefakerachelray · 1 year

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Random Miraculous Thoughts: Season 5 Catchup Edition

(Because I finally got caught up and I had to write my thoughts down! Warning: this is gonna be long. And spoilers for S5 up to Elation.)

You can tell that the writers saw people saying the Rooster’s power was OP and decided to put limits on it, which just made it more confusing in the end.

Marinette’s whole kwami scavenger hunt idea in Destruction was so clever! Also seeing Monarch get frustrated is always funny.

Poor Alya got the shock of her life when Monarch showed up though lol

They really just. Had Chat Cataclysm a person??? And it didn’t get reversed????

The Miraculous getting broken down and remade so they all look the same was A Lot to watch

Another new costume? How many have you been through at this point Gabriel?

At least this one’s better than the Shadowmoth look though

So we’re just. Acknowledging that other school years have happened now huh. Really forcing me to process that this whole show has canonically happened in less than a year.

I’ve brought this up before but is Marinette legally old enough to drive that scooter??? Is don’t know French law but. She’s 14????

I’m sorry but Darker Owl sounds stupid. It just does.

I guess you could say he used Daizzi as a Guinea Pig. No? Ok I’ll see myself out.

The dream sequence babies were so ugly sisjwbshsb

Can we talk about the mustache I’ve been dying to talk about the mustache

I miss when the magical charms actually mattered. I hate that it’s all megakumas all the time now (and that’s still a dumb name btw). That’s a rant for another post though.

I’ll admit I forgot some of the plot of Illusion because I was too distracted by everyone’s condiment-based Resistance nicknames. I hope the Resistance keeps being a thing just because those codenames are so funny.

The plan to film someone getting akumatized was solid they just picked the worst possible target without realizing it

I love how the sauce stain on Gabe’s suit was still there at the end but just a little bit faded, so you can tell he went into the bathroom and tried to get it out with water. We’ve all been there. You know how it is with spaghetti.

I have a LOT of thoughts about both Marinette and Adrien refusing to wear the Alliance rings

Lila in the Resistance what will she do

Marinette looks cute with her hair down!

Always good to see Luka and Kagami! I like that they support Marinette and Adrien getting together, although I wish that hadn’t been the only reason they were there.

I think Marinette and I would both prefer if the statue scene never got brought up again

The museum must have some inside sources to make completely accurate statues of every single superhero who’s ever appeared on the show.

Manipula’s outfit reminded me of someone else’s and I can’t think of who. Maybe Backwarder or Queen Banana?

Monarch. My dude. How hard is it to just let akumas out through the window like you used to? Using Voyage every time is lazy, and you’re overworking Kaalki.

That love square flip happened fast. Like, so fast it kinda caught me off guard.

Adrien: “I’m in love 😍” Marinette: “oh no I’m in LOVE”

Marinette, in what world is your superhero partner whose identity you don’t even know a safer person to have a crush on than a normal guy from your school (even if they’re really the same person)?

I am once again asking for more Plagg and Tikki scenes. It’s fun to see them gossip.

They’re right that these two idiots would tell each other their secret identities the second they got together and we all know it.

Nathalie SNAPPED! Good for her!

I’m also very concerned for her. Someone figure out how to help this woman ASAP.

Safari was scary powerful though. How many Miraculous powers did Gabriel give her?

Maybe I’m wrong but. Venom paralyzes people right, it doesn’t knock them out? So shouldn’t Ladybug have been VERY MUCH STILL CONSCIOUS WHEN ADRIEN DETRANSFORMED????

MR BUG AND LADY NOIRE RETURN! I’VE BEEN HOPING FOR THIS!

I love Mr Bug’s straightforward lucky charms

And how being Lady Noire brings out Marinette’s flirty side

I had totally forgotten the kwagatama even existed. It was nice to see it be relevant though.

Oh hey Joan of Arc!

Yay, Alix update! I lowkey want an episode that’s just her time travel adventures.

“My sister is time traveling and I have no idea if she’s safe and this happened suddenly without any warning” is a pretty reasonable thing to get upset over, I’ll give Jalil that.

Tbh original flavor Pharaoh was cooler. This version just traps people in an object, which is the same power as at least 3 other villains.

Horse Boy Adrien CONFIRMED?!

Not specific to this episode but I just thought of it again: why can’t the suit Ladybug gets after using Lucky Charm be her permanent costume? It’s better than the normal one.

Good for you Jalil! I love seeing people fight off akumas.

Awww, Plagg gave Adrien a kwagatama!

Last season I would’ve been cheering over Marinette throwing away the pictures but now when it immediately cut to Adrien walking into the bakery all nervous and blushing afterwards I was like “oh NO”

Alya: it wouldn’t be the end of world [if they got together] Tikki, aware of the events of Chat Blanc: 😬

A kiss! A real, actual kiss that didn’t get erased somehow! I never thought I’d see the day.

The funniest thing to me is I didn’t even know Elation was basically Glaciator 3 going in because everyone was talking about the kiss and no one cared about the villain

We should talk about Glaciator though because Andre knows more about what’s going on than most characters on this show

I don’t really have a favorite side of the love square, but I have to say Marichat was cute in this episode.

All this drama over who has feelings for who when they’re the same people. I can’t wait for the mutual facepalm if they ever figure out each other’s identities.

Chat’s point about confusing idolization of a superhero with real love and not wanting to take advantage of her is…surprisingly mature of him?

He made Marinette sad though and I will be holding that against him

In conclusion I like this season so far! The overarching plot is good to have, the different character dynamics are a nice change of pace, and above all, I’m SO glad it’s being released in order.

#random miraculous thoughts #miraculous ladybug #ml #ml spoilers #ml season 5 #long post

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icarusisstillflying · 2 years

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making a writeblr that i want to put time and effort into for realsies this time has made me think a lot about my writing, and how grateful i am that my writing has survived as long as it has, and there’s a reason that sounds so dramatic:

when i was about 13/14 yrs old, my dad and his wife discovered my writing (they are very controlling, and constantly looked thru my phone, had access to my email, etc. i am now no longer in contact with them). i had a lot of writing on my phone notes, but i also was using wattpad. at the time, i was in a long distance relationship w my first girlfriend, and we used wattpad to talk a lot bc of how intrusive my parents were. we connected through writing and putting stories on wattpad. but also at the time i was using my writing to explore sexuality and, as people do, i was writing smut. i never published it or showed anyone. it was just my own shit to read and write.

so when my dad and his wife snooped well enough through my phone, they found out about my girlfriend and my being queer, and they also found my very NSFW writing - oops. instead of talking about any of it with me beforehand, they deleted my writing. ALL of it. not just the sex stuff, they deleted all of my notes, all of my wattpad stories, literally everything that had my writing on it.

i had already been writing for years at this point. i had to start over from scratch with so many things. and it took me a while to get up the courage to start writing anything again, so i couldn’t remember everything i had planned out or written down.

i was in shambles. i had been outed to my very conservative and bigoted father and his wife, who lied and made up stories to my entire family about how perverted i was being with my girlfriend, and who also told everyone i was writing sex scenes. and all of my writing was gone. it had been the only way to express myself and it was gone. it was traumatic.

now, they will never get to read any of my stories and know that they’re mine. now, i write stories of people taking back what’s theirs unapologetically. my writing is better because i worked so hard to keep it alive after they fucking destroyed it seven years ago. they always tried to suppress my creative side, my musical side, my artistic side, and so now they never get to see anything i create. i have survived so much, and my writing has survived so much, and i will continue to create and express myself however the fuck i want.

express yourself however the fuck you want. it’s so important. don’t keep all that shit inside where it will fester and eventually boil over. and always create, no matter how weird other ppl might think it is. i love my writing, and you should love your writing too.

i could have given up on writing when they did that shit to me seven years ago. but i didn’t. and i’m so fucking glad i didn’t.

#vent #trauma #ok to rb #also ok to completely ignore LOL #i haven’t stopped thinking about this for a bit #mentions of smut #listen i just love writing so much

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blazlngblade · 2 years

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Hello I’m a person who has no problem with spoilers, can you please tell me why I should hate Rondo because he seems sus. owo

Aah, there's a lot of reasons! And it's not even that he's suspicious in any way! In fact, quite the opposite.

The problem, is that he is so perfect or written in the way the scene needs him to be, and that's bad writing! Not saying that growing as a character is wrong, but this character doesn't "grow", he changes per scene. He goes from immature and really dumb in Bestower of Fame, to perfect protagonist in Bestower of All.

THERE ARE MAJOR SPOILERS for "Bestower of Fame" and "Bestower of All", so please be mindful of this! This is also going to be a wordy answer, I am a rambler, but I do hope you read it if you don't mind spoilers!

General Points

At a young age of 13, his house was broken into and brigands are aiming to steal the dragonstones. After failing to protect his younger sister, Cordelia Ravus at age 7, Sazantos comes and defeats the brigands. Rondo basically just decides that this stranger is the best and he wants to follow behind him, to be like Sazantos.

He should be the lord of the house now that his parents are dead, but instead he left to become a Knight Ardante, leaving his less than 14 year old sister to run the house on her own with Heathcote.

When Rondo leaves, he tells Cordelia and Heathcote that he will hunt for the dragonstones, but then never looks for them even once, even later on telling Heathcote that he is "surprised that you're having trouble, Heathcote". Like, you said you'd look, and Heathcote's also busy trying to take care of Cordelia and help run a house. SHE IS 14!! Rondo is like ~20, what a great brother and should-be-lord-of-the-house…

Later, Heathcote travels to Flamesgrace, wanting to ask Rondo for help. He tells Heathcote, "Hey, hire a thief, that'll help to find the dragonstones." So basically, Therion getting into this mess is NOT Cordelia's fault, it's NOT Heathcote's fault. It's Rondo's! Not only did the problem get caused because thieves broke in many years ago, so this idea is putting his 15 year old sister in danger if the wrong thief breaks in and hurts her somehow. Brother of the year, huh? He puts his sister in danger because he doesn't want to do his duty to his house.

Rondo wanting to be like Sazantos comes across as obsessive (and that's never okay…!), as reminder that Sazantos barely wants anything to do with Rondo, constantly saying that he is still a child.

The fans (specifically the Japanese fans) often take Rondo and Sazantos as a shipping, and like I said, Rondo is very immature, is often called a child, and is extremely obsessive of his teacher. Yes, this is a teacher-student pair and that's kind of gross! Please don't ship this! Since Rondo leaves House Ravus, he kinda just stalks after Sazantos who obviously left because his duty was done when saving the children.

Bestower of Fame Points

We meet Rondo as a Knight Ardante, and are told that he is the apparent next for the Flameguard after Sazantos retires. Rondo comes across as immature, and we are told many times by Sazantos that he doesn't want a softhearted successor. Rondo's just written to be in this important role, and I am not sure who gave it to him if Sazantos barely thinks he can do it.

Chapter 1 has Rondo still extremely immature, once again being told that he wouldn't be a good Flameguard. He doesn't seem to be growing, and that's an issue if he's going to be such an important role for the Church of the Sacred Flame.

Chapter 1 also has Rondo suddenly "step up" to play detective for a relatively useless plot. We're trying to find Miza, and he's kinda just making it seem like it's not important when he starts questioning Tarset about things that are unrelated to Miza's disappearance.

Chapter 2 has him still extremely immature, he's fanboying over Atlasdam's Castle (which tbh, is very mediocre compared to Rondo's house), kind of addresses Princess Mary improperly, basically by yelling at her for her attention.

Also in Chapter 2 when things start to get serious and we're back in Flamesgrace, monsters attack the church. Sazantos stays in the church wanting to figure out the mastermind behind the murders, as well as to defend the pontiff. Rondo, instead of defending the church, basically says "It's impossible! We need Sazantos!!" If he's supposed to be the Flameguard one day, the this is something he needs to work on and he needs to have confidence in his skills, not rely on his teacher's aid when he is busy defending Pontiff Julius, who is obviously important to the church.

When everyone gets a break after fighting the monsters, the Chosen One, Sazantos, and Rondo go to confront the mastermind. It's revealed as Ceraphina and Rondo… for some reason acts as if this is betrayal to him personally when the two barely spoke or know each other. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt though, she was a respected member of the church.

By the end of the chapter, the Chosen One is sent to go after Ceraphina in the Cave of Origin. She gets away and steals the First Flame, leaving the Chosen One to fight the corrupted Guardian of the Flame. When Rondo appears, his first concern is that Sazantos is injured… NOT THE FACT THAT THE FIRST FLAME IS GONE!!

Chapter 3… He constantly keeps saying negative things when the characters have no choice but to confront Ceraphina. Saying things like, "Do we even want to go in there?" "Is it even possible?" "You really are the Chosen One…!" when he shouldn't have ever had doubt in the Chosen One to begin with. Like ouch, not like they saved a lot of people previously and collected many rings already.

After a few battles, instead of seeing if the injured Rinyuu is okay as she was being used for a ceremony that Lyblac wanted to happen, (Surprise! Rinyuu is a Crossford!) he asks Sazantos if he is okay, not the potentially dead Rinyuu on the ground. I don't even like Rinyuu, but… ouch. Imagine nearly facing human sacrifice and you can't even get support from a supposed friend.

Bestower of All Points

That "immature child" is suddenly gone. And now Rondo is written to just benefit whatever is happening. He's suddenly perfect at everything he does, the perfect protagonist. Rondo makes this whole story all about himself. In Bestower of All is supposed to be the story that connects all three stories (Wealth, Power, and Fame) together, but him and Araune kinda just take over it leaving everyone else to be side characters. Who doesn't love Bargello as a main character? Naww, now he's a side character to Rondo…

Rondo spends most of his time obsessing over Sazantos (who is now a villain), Rondo thinks he can "convert" Sazantos back to the light despite constantly being told it's not likely.

For some reason now, Sazantos is basically just as obsessed with Rondo now and keeps trying to coax Rondo to the "dark side", but we were told that Sazantos barely thinks Rondo is capable. Why the sudden change in this writing. Even to the last moment in Bestower of Fame, we're told that Sazantos doesn't really like Rondo, but now the writers are pushing some unheathly romance it seems. Which is gross as it's based on verbal abuse, teacher-student, and obsession.

Chapter 4 is Rondo's main chapter, this is when it gets really annoying. Rondo proceeds to act perfect, for some reason thinks he's able to offer Tatloch a pardon despite being a Edoras prisoner, and more.

When we go to Limbo Hornburg, we make it to King Alfred who introduces everyone to Sonzone… Who is Sonzone? A previous Flameguard. This guy exists only to give Rondo the Flame power that he was supposed to receive from Sazantos to become the Flameguard. But first a trial is taken. Sonzone basically tries to manipulate Rondo into murdering the Chosen One… Yes, because this guy who has Aelfric's Flame saying to murder the person with Aelfric's Ring makes perfect sense. After some… possession trial? Rondo manages to fight against the power and refuses to kill the Chosen One. He receives the Flame from Sonzone. Alfred and Sonzone then start brainrotting over the name "Ravus", and it's really uncomfortable. Richard has to get them to stop by saying, "Are we forgetting something?"

Chapter 5… Everyone goes to the Gate of Finis… Rondo literally opens the Gate of Finis by basically snapping his finger… No dragonstones, no special blood of Soloman's family, no relation to a Crossford, and no special ritual. He shows his Flame and the gate opens… With that, we just erased the use of the dragonstones, and kind of erases a lot of lore that we are told.

This got very wordy. My apologies! But long story short, Rondo is very plot convenient, changes for every scene he needs to, unhealthily obsessed with his teacher, and he abandoned his young sister, and duty to finding the dragonstones. It's just awful of him to do. And as most know, there's no mention of Rondo in the first game. We can make the assumption he may have never come back, whether he died, became the Flameguard and is to busy doing church duty, or just straight up abandoned his house forever. Keep in mind that poor Cordelia isn't even an adult in either games.

#Octopath Traveler #Octopath CotC #Octopath Rondo #Octopath Therion #Cordelia Ravus #Octopath Heathcote #Rosa Rants

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