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coochiequeens · 11 months

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“My bar has always been an inclusive bar,” she said. “Trans people should be respected and have rights, and lesbian women who are born female should also have a space for themselves.” “If the young woman said: I prefer women, then the trans woman was offended and cried transphobia. But this young woman is not transphobic, it’s just a matter of consent, she doesn’t like penises, since she’s a lesbian!”

A lesbian bar that has operated in Rennes, France for nearly a decade has been forced to close its doors following a disturbing swell of vandalism and death threats by trans activists. Orane Guéneau, the owner and manager of lesbian bar La Part des Anges, was publicly denounced as “transphobic” and accused of “misgendering” by critics.

Speaking with Ouest France, Guéneau said she made the decision to shut down the venue to protect her employees in response to increased aggression, both online and at her storefront. On April 14, four unnamed trans activists spray painted the menacing message “Fuck TERFs,” accompanied by a trans symbol, on the front door of the venue during activities that were aimed at opposing national pension reform.

“I have to close after the attack that we experienced,” Guéneau told Ouest France. “The window was tagged and a pane was broken, it was hyperviolent for employees and customers, and the bar was full.”

A few days before the acts of vandalism were committed, Guéneau made a book critical of trans activism available to her patrons.

Titled When Girls Become Boys and written by Marie-Jo Bonnet, her detractors considered the act to be representative of her “coming out” as transphobic, and condemned her on social media.

But the backlash was not limited to vandalism and social media condemnation, Guéneau also started to receive threatening messages scrawled on paper slipped under her door last month, some of which read: “Save a trans, commit suicide,” and “One bullet, one TERF.”

Guéneau faced further harassment throughout the month of May when a local chapter of the French feminist organization Nous Toutes published a statement calling for their supporters to boycott the bar.

“In Rennes or elsewhere: no feminism without trans people,” reads the call to action from Nous Toutes 35. “For several years, people from the Queer community have been denouncing attacks against them in a bar in Rennes: La Part des Anges. These recurring assaults are all the more problematic since this bar claims an identity as a lesbian and feminist bar.”

The statement continues: “Therefore, it’s important that this bar finally gets massively denounced. We would also like to call on the various political, activist or cultural organizations to stop organizing with this bar… transphobes have no place in our struggles.”

In response to the statement from Nous Toutes 35, Guéneau announced that she had filed a complaint for defamation, harassment and cyber-harassment.

Yet despite the claims of “transphobia,” Guéneau has said that her venue has always been accepting of people who claim to be transgender.

“My bar has always been an inclusive bar,” she said. “Trans people should be respected and have rights, and lesbian women who are born female should also have a space for themselves.”

However, tensions have escalated over the past five years as Guéneau defended lesbian patrons who were being harassed by men who self-identified as women and attended the venue seeking sex.

On multiple occasions, Guéneau told Charlie Hebdo, trans-identified males came to the lesbian bar to flirt with same-sex attracted women.

“If the young woman said: I prefer women, then the trans woman was offended and cried transphobia. But this young woman is not transphobic, it’s just a matter of consent, she doesn’t like penises, since she’s a lesbian!”

Women’s rights campaigner and founder of FemellisteMarguerite Stern shared her support for Guéneau, and questioned the accusations of “misgendering” leveled against her. Stern also placed blame for some of the harassment Guéneau endured in part on Nous Toutes for their public condemnation of the venue.

Nous Toutes, the liberal feminist group spearheading the harassment of the lesbian bar, has previously attacked causes they deemed to be “transphobic.”

In 2022, the group announced it would no longer provide data on domestic femicides due to concerns over the sex-based data being used by “transphobes.”

Nous Toutes had originally been founded to provide public insight into violence against women and girls in France, but launched into a social media war with another anti-femicide campaign group over transgenderism.

After Féminicides Par Compagnons ou Ex accurately reported that no trans-identified males had been murdered by domestic violence in France in 6 years, Nous Toutes responded by suspending their release of any data related to the murder of women and girls in the nation, claiming that the information was “oppressive” and “otherwise illegal.”

Nous Toutes then convened to determine how to make their femicide data reporting more “inclusive,” floating strategies which included counting general transphobia as femicide.

Violence against women critical of gender ideology is a regular occurrence in France, with multiple instances of women being physically attacked for not accepting the concept that trans-identified males were “female” being recorded over the past two years.

Reduxx previously reported on violence breaking out at French pro-woman events deemed “transphobic,” including on International Women’s Day in 2021 and 2022 when a number of women were left with injuries from rampaging trans activists.

In April of this year, a symposium intended to raise awareness of the plight of Afghan and Iranian women was abruptly postponed after trans activists threatened to violently ambush the event because of the presence of a gender critical speaker.

By Genevieve Gluck

Genevieve is the Co-Founder of Reduxx, and the outlet's Chief Investigative Journalist with a focused interest in pornography, sexual predators, and fetish subcultures. She is the creator of the podcast Women's Voices, which features news commentary and interviews regarding women's rights.

#France #Rennes #La Part des Anges #Ouest France #When Girls Become Boys #Marie-Jo Bonnet #Censorship #death threats against lesbians #Nous Toutes Calls themselves a feminist organization but is ok with harassing lesbians #Lesbians don’t like dick #transbians #Drop the T #transwomen being sex pests #TRAs not happy with allies unless they are absolutely servile #Féminicides Par Compagnons ou Ex told the truth #Telling men NO is not the same as femicide

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hadesoftheladies · 9 months

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the fact that men believe feminism (or anything feminist-esque) is about being anti-man (like men are such neutral, benevolent, benign creatures) tells me all i need to know about who men are

if you're mad at feminism for shedding light on rapists, domestic violence, pedophiles, porn-head predators, groomers, autogynephiles, sex slavery and human trafficking, the exploitation of women and girls, fgm, medical malpractice against women and girls, religious burnings, torture of females, femicide . . . all of which NO OTHER MOVEMENT HAS DONE ON NEARLY THE SAME SCALE BTW . . .

guess what that makes you?

#radblr #radfem #feminism

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a-forbidden-detective · 5 months

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Another day, another discovery.

The blurry couple on the left will become Unno-san and Donzawa from the Observatory on Solitary Island arc.

The two men on the right will become Torage and his victim.

The femicide victim and her husband are already un-blurred while Kawasemi-san and Yamane still await their turn.

The young woman sitting on the bench’s arm support will become Onodera the photographer and John Grizzly behind her.

Culled from Episode 2, the Case of the Piggy Bank Murder

Much has been said ( @ecargmura ) on the opening song’s blurring of the people around Ron and Toto that has become clearer once these supporting characters have appeared from the episodes.

@plant-akki posted several gifs of these comparisons from episode 3 to the latest.

But have you noticed the man who’s running with the billowing black coat? Once he is seen running in the other direction, but most of the time Ron and Toto are chasing after him.

During Episode 8, the man on the left becomes Jumonji, the director of the observatory. But take a look at the man wearing a black coat running behind him.

He’s now in front of Toto. It looks like the duo is running after him.

He’s appeared now behind them of what looks like a rendition of the “Murder on the Orient Express.”

In the end, he’s pointed the crime scene to them from what looks like a scene from a Japanese detective TV series or mystery film.

The trench-coat wearing Ron is a direct reference to “Columbo.”

Take note that it is only Ron who wears different kinds of clothing, depends on the media he’s dreaming in, while Toto still wears his grey suit.

Anyway, it is none other this guy.

This guy here, Sherlock Holmes, and the man next to him, his John Watson, are fond of running after their suspects in this BBC series. This image is iconic.

It must be an homage, or a running gag (no pun intended), that Ron and Toto should do the same as Ron gets to live his dream of becoming a full-fledged detective like his ancestor with the help of Toto. Hence, Toto holding his friend’s hand who must be telling him, “Hey, slow down, I got you, you are all right. I’ll be here beside you. You aren’t alone now.”

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herdemonspeaking · 3 months

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Be aware of women who are using spiritual terms to justify their internalized misogyny. Feminine energy and masculine energy are not feminine and masculine traits. They're energies that need to be balanced 50:50 in order for a person to survive and thrive in this world. Whereas, femininity and masculinity are socially constructed gender stereotypes to bring women down and make them weak. There's no such thing as "being feminine" or "being masculine". Both are bullshit!!

So when a woman is saying she doesn't want to be independent or work and she would rather depend on a man because she wants to "feel like a woman" and "be feminine", she's trying to tell you that women are supposed to be lazy and do nothing, and just stay at home and relax.

Don't listen to these idiots!! What they're doing is called benevolent sexism. It's the praising and flattering of women for their undervalued qualities they were conditioned to believe as "natural". Some common examples are; “Women are naturally better at loving and caring and doing housework” OR “I love having a masculine "manly" man now i can relax, apply lipgloss all day and not worry about anything else” OR “Women are beautiful when they're vulnerable and submissive it brings out their feminine side and that's how they attract better mEn” etc. These type of statements are deliberately more positive in tone than the hostile sexism we encountered that was accompanied by harsh statements like “Women are inferior to men and should stay at home”.

Since their old tactics didn't work, they have started this new 'feminine woman' trend which also, hilariously, is not working. As we can see, every year more and more women are ending marriages, leaving their husbands to rot in misery and choosing the life of independency. Queens!!

Patriarchy has two legs and one of them is traditional women. These women use the "femininity" word and insert it in every nonsensical sentence they have to say to achieve the same goal the other leg has been trying to achieve since decades; Subjugating women. The "feminine woman" concepts, vulnerability and dependency in particular, are harmful and deceiving because it sets men as the "protector" when we have seen countless times that most perpetrators of femicide and mistreatment of women are men themselves. It's conditional, and usually the condition is that you maintain a good physical appearance so you can easily sell yourself to a "masculine man" who will provide for you and protect you. It upholds the patriarchal notion that women had to earn their way to get that type of treatment.

As a spiritualist, it's quite triggering to see these women using spiritual terms now to fulfill their agenda. Please do not let them confuse you the feminine and masculine energies with gender norms. I can assure you the energies have nothing to do with this femininity and masculinity bullshit. Feminine energy is spiritual energy you need for your soul nourishment and masculine energy is physical energy that is required for your physical self/your body. Both need to be balanced for your whole self to feel complete and thrive. You don't need a man in your life to stay in your feminine energy. It's already within you. You just need to tap into your masculine energy to bring it out. Energies are naturally dependent on each other, not the sexes. These energy terms have a meaning and it goes beyond the bounds that we have set for what we consider gender to be.

Furthermore, being self-dependent and breaking gender stereotypes do not block your blessings at all. I don't know what illiterate person said that. A woman connect with her divine feminine energy and be in her receiving energy much smoothly when she's self-reliant. In fact, I have seen independent women receiving more abundance than the ones who are relying on men. Remember, you receive your blessings from God or The Universe, not a man. A man is more likely to intercept your blessings and take it all away with himself. And this has been happening since centuries. Men have stolen credits, brilliant ideas, money and all other kind of gifts from their wives that those women were meant to receive.

Therefore, it's essential for you all to be entirely independent. It's not just a choice, it's necessary. Don't let yourself be deceived by these stupid traditional women. You were put into this world to do great things and be a bigger person. Don't waste your life being nothing but just an accessory to a man.

#radblr #spirituality #radical feminism #radical feminist safe #women #radical feminist community #feminism #independent woman #divine feminine #feminine energy #traditional woman #wonder woman #womenempowerment #mature woman #matriarchy

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maslows-pyramid-scheme · 9 months

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Sorry to be a coward and not post this on the post myself, but every time I respond to menalez her cronies start spamming my inbox calling me all sorts of pornographic things and making jokes about my sexual assault.

What's her beef with you saying "All women are discriminated against on the basis of sex and sexuality"? It's correct. In many parts of the world the leading cause of familial femicide is the suspicion, real or unreal, of a woman having heterosexual sex. In many places it's pregnancy or at least happens to pregnant women. Radfems of all orientations point this out all the time. These are most often the direct result of sex (misogyny) but obviously the sexuality of the women is not irrelevant. Men hate women's sexual behavior. There is a reason whore, slut, bitch, and other terms that degrade women on the basis of sexuality are the most common misogynistic insults. Domestic violence is another example.

"All women suffer discrimination (material disadvantage + abuse), even if they are OSA" does not mean that lesbians don't suffer their own specialized form of discrimination, scrutinty, and some intensified forms of misogyny. This does not diminish the horrible things lesbian have to go through, and that society has no place for them. This does not means hetero women are do not have the privilege of avoiding lesbophobia. Of course hetero women can avoid lesbophobia. But that does not mean they are "net" privileged with no necessary caveats.

And if their stance is that het and bi women gain material advantage by not partnering with men or being around men (which agree with), how is it offensive to say that het and bi women suffer material disadvantage for partnering with men or being around men? It's literally alluding to the same thing! Am I crazy? If just saying this gets them so bad, I don't think they know if they agree with themselves then. It seems to change depending on how and when they want to dismiss all problems bi women face, or at the very least they only want it put in very specific language rather than being viewed from all angles.

I'm sorry to hear that her friends have treated you so poorly; it's not, and it never will be, appropriate or feminist to call people by pornographic terms or to mock their sexual assault. You're welcome to DM/anon message me and vent if you ever need support <3

I agree with your assessment, and I see how heterosexual women are targeted for their sex and their sexuality in my volunteer work all the time.

First example -

An abusive husband sexually abuses his heterosexual wife (sex discrimination). As part of the abuse, he forces her to have sex with other women (sexuality discrimination), records it (sex + sexuality discrimination), and threatens to send the footage to friends and family if she ever leaves him (sex + sexuality discrimination). He knows that her friends and family will ostracise her if he spreads the footage (sex + sexuality discrimination).

Second example -

A heterosexual young woman lives in a conservative society and rejects a young man's romantic advances. In retaliation, he lies and tells people that they had sex (sex discrimination) and she is shunned in her community for being 'impure' as a consequence (sexuality discrimination). There is nothing she can do to fix her reputation or protect herself from further abuse.

Final example -

A heterosexual woman is sex trafficked to another country and forced to work in an illegal brothel (sex discrimination - but I think you could argue sexuality discrimination too). She wants to leave, but she's worried that she'll be returned to her country of origin and that people will shun her (sexuality discrimination).

I could go on for days... these lived experiences aren't just a form of sex discrimination, they're a form of sex discrimination specifically reliant on abuses of a woman's sexuality.

But I have no idea what her problem is; I know that it's easy to conflate sex discrimination with sexuality discrimination, but she seems determined to take things a step further and claim that I think lesbians oppress heterosexual women or something. It's not just a misunderstanding, it's a bad faith, dishonest way of reading my comment (and it's a perfect example of why I think the axis of oppression is brain rotting).

#you're not crazy; this is just really stupid and dishonest discourse #i think menalez should reread the dictionary definitions of 'sexuality' and 'sexual orientation'#anon

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ukrfeminism · 1 year

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10 minute read

In early January 2012, Karen Ingala Smith was at the airport returning from holiday when she took a call from a colleague. She heard that a desperate young woman who’d sought help from Nia, the women’s refuge charity Ingala Smith runs, had just been murdered. Once back home, Ingala Smith opened her laptop to find out more.

Searching Google for “woman’s body found”, she soon discovered Nia’s client Kirsty Treloar, 20, the mother of a month-old baby who’d been abducted from her family home in Hackney, east London, by her boyfriend, Myles Williams, from whom she’d recently fled. Stabbing Kirsty’s brother and sister as they tried to stop him, Williams bundled her into his car. Later her body was found two miles away, dumped behind a wheelie bin, with 29 knife wounds.

But this online search yielded other results, so Ingala Smith read on. That same day in Co Durham, Susan McGoldrick, along with her sister Alison Turnbull and niece Tanya, were shot dead by her partner, Michael Atherton. Meanwhile in Nuneaton, nightclub bouncer Aaron Mann had beaten his girlfriend, Claire O’Connor, then smothered her with a pillow. The next day in Shropshire, a retired teacher, Betty Yates, 77, was beaten with her walking stick and stabbed to death by a drifter, Stephen Farrow. On January 3 in Buckinghamshire, Marie McGrory was strangled with a dog lead by her husband, John; in South Lanarkshire Kathleen Milward, 87, was bludgeoned to death by her grandson, Garry Kane.

Through her work, Ingala Smith was grimly familiar with such killings. But this deluge of cases appalled her. Eight British women had been murdered by men – all except one a partner or family member – in the first week of 2012. Each brutal murder, illustrated with a smiling holiday snap, was reported as neutrally as the weather: men killing their womenfolk was “just one of those things”.

“Perhaps because it was the start of the year,” says Ingala Smith. “I made a list of the names, as that’s the easiest way to tell one case from another. And then I never stopped.”

She began trawling local newspaper and police websites, creating an ExCel spreadsheet which she’d update as cases came to court.

It was an upsetting task, which Ingala Smith learnt to avoid just before bedtime. Her data collection method was crude but, until this year, the Office for National Statistics (ONS) only published figures for the sex of victims, not their killers, making female victims of male violence hard to quantify. As her list lengthened Ingala Smith created a Counting Dead Women Twitter account, posting each killing. This attracted public attention and a philanthropist who awarded her a grant to hire part-time staff. Now she could analyse murder trends and since 2015 has published the Femicide Census.

But what mattered most to Ingala Smith were women’s names, not numbers. So in 2016 she was delighted when the Labour MP Jess Phillips – who’d previously worked for Women’s Aid – asked to read them out on International Women’s Day. Now this roll call of more than 120 stolen lives, recited to a hushed House of Commons, has become an annual commemoration. “Dead women is a thing we’ve all just accepted as part of our daily lives,” Phillips said last year, when among the names was Sarah Everard. The list not only put male violence in the national spotlight but, says Ingala Smith, “Family after family have said how important it is to hear their loved one’s name read out in parliament, and know it is recorded in Hansard for ever.”

Now Ingala Smith, 54, has written a book, Defending Women’s Spaces, drawing upon more than 30 years of working with vulnerable women who are homeless or fleeing domestic abuse. After witnessing the power of female-only services she is alarmed by moves to make “gender identity” rather than sex the criteria for admission to refuges and rape survivor groups. She points out that 98 per cent of rapes and 90 per cent of violent crime is committed by males. While “What is a woman?” has become a question politicians struggle to answer, Ingala Smith is categoric. “Allowing biological males with transgender identities to access women’s spaces,” she writes, “poses a serious potential risk to women’s safety, wellbeing and recovery.”

Ingala Smith grew up in a home that was far from harmonious: anger and upset were never far away. The man she called Dad was a builder, providing what she describes as “a comfortable working-class home” in Huddersfield, West Yorkshire. But, she says, he was a controlling man: “It felt the whole family, especially my mum, was always walking on eggshells.”

Eventually, when Ingala Smith was 18, her mother left and confided in a friend that Karen had a different father. In fact, she was the product of a fling at 18 with her fiancé’s best man, a Sicilian who’d moved to Yorkshire to marry a local girl he’d met in Milan. While Ingala Smith’s brother and sister were blond, she was dark and, as she grew older, her mother secretly removed photos from the wedding album in case she noticed how similar she looked to a certain guest.

When Ingala Smith heard about her real father she made contact. At 21 she met him at Thornton railway station, near Bradford. “I was looking for this gorgeous Italian man,” she says. “I’m thinking Robert De Niro, Al Pacino – and actually I got Danny DeVito.” She laughs. They hit it off straight away and she was quickly welcomed into his family, later meeting her Sicilian grandparents.

A bright girl, Ingala Smith found school a sanctuary from her troubled home life. There were few books in her house and she’d never considered A-levels let alone college, “but I happened to have a good friend from what you might call a first generation middle-class family. I remember having my mind blown that they had political conversations around the dinner table, because we weren’t allowed to speak when we were eating.”

Studying sociology at sixth-form college was “absolutely life-changing – it put everything I was experiencing into context”. It was here she first encountered feminism, which she regarded then as irrelevant, feeling more in common with the lads from her old comprehensive than the “posh girls” now in her class who’d been at a fee-paying school.

After graduating from the University of Kent, she took a job in a hostel for homeless women, mainly elderly former psychiatric patients. Then, after two years, she began work at a domestic violence refuge and felt immediately she was in the right place. “Any woman I met could have been my mother. In fact, one summer Mum came on a trip we organised for the refuge kids and she started talking about how there hadn’t been anything like this when she’d needed it.”

Would her mother have left for a refuge? Ingala Smith shrugs. “I don’t know. They are not easy places to live in. We had a nice home and to give that up would be really hard, as it is for anyone.” She says people rarely understand refuges are places of absolute last resort. “They can be chaotic, noisy. Women who have other economic choices would go elsewhere. You’re moving into a house with maybe ten other families that you don’t know, with children of all different ages, with very different parenting ideas to your own. They can really help kids who’ve grown up with violent dads because they meet others in the same boat. But they’re challenging places.”

A move to a refuge is invariably fast. A woman in danger is referred by police or social services, then refuge staff have a brief phone call to try to determine whether she’s a danger to others – perhaps has a history of violence or arson – before arranging to meet her close by. (A refuge never gives out its address on the phone.) “You’d imagine women would turn up black and blue, but that is rare,” Ingala Smith says. “I think women wait until they’re ‘decent’. Besides, after an assault they often don’t have the strength to get themselves together. They wait until it’s quieter, when they know it’s coming again, and then leave.”

The refuge suggests a safety plan: to gather up passports and bank books; siphon possessions discreetly to a friend’s house; to remember that you’re most at risk of violence just after leaving. Ingala Smith notes there were few referrals in late December. “Women didn’t want to leave violent men and disrupt Christmas for children, and you knew anybody who came at that time of year – one year we had a woman turn up on Christmas Eve with three kids – was in a really bad way. In January, the phone rings off the hook.”

Ingala Smith has been the CEO of Nia since 2009. Beginning as Hackney Women’s Aid in 1975, it supports about 2,000 women a year, running a specialist refuge for women in prostitution and another for those dealing with substance abuse. Much has changed since she joined the refuge movement: many small feminist charities have merged as they must now compete for council contracts with generic housing trusts. These don’t provide the “woman-centred care” Ingala Smith believes is vital for those fleeing violent men.

Nia also works with women at high risk of domestic violence and runs East London Rape Crisis, serving both sexes. Here it counsels men and trans women, whom it often refers to Galop, a specialist LGBT+ anti-abuse charity. But no male people – whether men or trans women – are allowed into Nia refuges or group counselling.

In 2017, Nia’s trustees decided to invoke the exemptions in the Equality Act that permit single-sex services “as a proportionate means of achieving a legitimate aim”. It knew this was a risk. Such is the toxic debate on gender, female-only services often receive threats to their funding or have staff reported to trustees merely for liking a JK Rowling tweet. They receive hoax calls to test whether they are trans inclusive. The whole sector is chilled by how trans activists targeted Vancouver Rape Relief and Women’s Shelter: it was defunded, vandalised and had a dead rat pinned to its door for remaining single sex.

The question of whether a trans woman can safely be accommodated alongside women has riven the refuge movement. “They [trans women] are not a potential risk to women because they are trans,” she writes, “but because they are male.” She cites cases of trans prisoners like Karen White who were allowed into female jails and sexually abused inmates. “Prison officers, who are really good at risk-assessing violent men, get it wrong. So how can we screen [people] in five-minute phone calls?”

Besides, this is about more than safety. Many women in refuges endured sexual abuse, often as children. Being housed with any males generates a debilitating and involuntary post-traumatic response in the brain. “It’s not hate. It’s not bigotry. It’s not transphobia,” she says. “It is an impact of abuse by men… The presence of a male-bodied person among vulnerable women causes distress and consternation.” She is aghast that Mridul Wadhwa, the trans woman who heads Edinburgh Rape Crisis, told The Guilty Feminist podcast last year that female survivors who demand male-free spaces should work to “reframe their trauma”.

In group counselling, she says, male people have been socialised to dominate groups, to ask more questions and take up space, while women have learnt to serve and make way for them. “I remember talking to a woman about what her options were and she started crying. I asked why. She said, ‘Nobody’s ever given me a choice before.’ To recover, women have to centre themselves in their own lives.”

But what of women who say they have no problem receiving counselling alongside trans women? “I understand that some female rape survivors can say, ‘A women-only service is not important to me. I’d be happy for a trans sister to be in my group.’ If they want to say that, it’s fine, but they shouldn’t take away that choice from women for whom it isn’t fine.” Young women who campaign for trans-inclusive services, she says, are mainly middle-class graduates unlikely to need them. Nia’s younger staff support the policy, even though defending it has cost some of them friends.

At root, Ingala Smith believes, violence suffered by women and trans women has a different dynamic. In her book she disputes Stonewall’s assertion that trans women suffer the highest levels of domestic abuse and murder. “Well, show me the data. Because I hear that, but I’ve never seen figures to demonstrate it.” She has collated every murder victim who might come under the broad Stonewall definition of a trans woman (which includes occasional cross-dressers). Since 2009, there have been nine murders, the last being Amy Griffiths in 2019. Most were sex workers murdered by punters or who died in drug-related fights. Just one, Vanessa Santillan in 2015, was killed by an intimate partner.

By contrast, only about 8 per cent of women victims are killed by strangers, the rest by men they know. “Most women’s refuges work exclusively with women who are fleeing partners, former partners and, in some cases, family members,” she writes. “That doesn’t mean other people don’t need places of safety or support, just that their experiences and needs are different.” She wonders why Stonewall doesn’t devote its resources to setting up specialist services rather than campaigning against those created by and for women.

The Femicide Census has revealed trends Ingala Smith hadn’t anticipated. “I was shocked,” she says, “by the number of elderly women killed in burglaries. I assumed that if a man broke into an old woman’s house he might push her down the stairs, she could be frail and bang her head. But there’s a real brutality, a particular anger and misogyny involved. Often young men use sexual violence against elderly women.” She was also surprised how many women are killed by their own sons.

Twice as many men are murdered than women but overwhelmingly by other men. When women kill – 8 per cent of murderers are female – they are both more likely to use a weapon (which makes it an aggravated offence in sentencing) and to have been abused by their victim, while men, being stronger, frequently kill with their bare hands. Strangulation is men’s second most common murder method and lately Ingala Smith has seen many lawyers adopt the “sex game gone wrong” defence.

How has devoting her life to the terrible things men do to women affected her own life? “I had a string of disastrous relationships – I just shagged around, basically – and didn’t think men were up to much.” She’d find herself moved to tears when witnessing a happy family, since her own experience was so dysfunctional.

Then, after writing off men as “avenues for happiness”, she decided to apply herself properly rather than settling for “whoever I ended up snogging in a pub at the weekend”. She started internet dating, setting herself high standards. The result was her husband of 20 years, André, a subtitler of South African parentage who speaks four languages, to whom she dedicates her book. They have no children, after several painful failed courses of IVF.

Ingala Smith knows her book will put her further in the firing line – the Labour Party has already refused her application for membership – but single-sex services “are the hill I’m prepared to die on”. That list of dead women never gets any shorter, I say. Will there ever be fewer names? “That’s the subject of my PhD, which I’m just finishing,” she says, “and my next book.” Defending Women’s Spaces by Karen Ingala Smith is out now (£15.99, Polity)

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secularprolifeconspectus · 1 year

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Radfems genuinely radicalized me into being pro-life. Like I would never considered myself really that pro choice, the closest was "I would never have an abortion but bodily autonomy or whatever", but it was the consistent vitriol I saw against pro lifers and any good-faith neutral party that actually made me change my mind.

Time and time again I saw pro-lifers sympathize and understand pro-choice arguments and women, but the same is never with those ladies. They refuse to even believe that anyone is truly pro-life. They consistently exercise intellectual stupidity with their reverse No True Scotsman.They insult them, call them women haters and compare them to rapist ,(ironically) murders and every dirty word in the book. They cheer when their pregnancy centers (both religious and secular ones) are attacked and bombed, and wonder why people think their sickos.

They are anti science. The statement 'Fetuses are human beings' isn't a pro-life 'arguement' it is literal fact. The fact they read it as some charged statement says much about them. It's really rich for a group of people that constantly tell trans people they are ignoring 'basic biology'

Their ideology also supports femicide and eugenics. Do you know the amount of times I've seen radfems on this god forsaken sight say "pro-choice always!Even that means ableist women who were a 110% willing to have a child until they found out they might have down syndrome"? Like newsflash, that's Eugenics! Systems of oppression are built off individual actors, and a society that normalizes killing the disabled, even if unborn, is an Eugenicist one. If that makes you uncomfortable, then good! One even defended sex selective abortion against girls "if that what the mom really wanted". It's so funny to see a group people that constantly hammer that people's individual actions do not exist in an apolitical vacuum, but to even imply that a country that encourages people to kill their disabled fetuses will have some negative societal consequence on disabled people as a whole will make them explode.

These women are some of the most morally spinless and heartless people I have ever encountered on the internet. They think killing the unborn is a flex tape for women's oppression. They fully support genocide as long as it's women doing it. They are as violent and bloodthirsty as the men they piss and shit about constantly. It takes so much strength for me everyday to realize that they are not representative of the average pro-choicer.

Pro-lifers have genuinely given a more understanding and rational look upon the abortion debate for both sides of it, than any pro-choicer, let alone radfems,has.

So this is a really long about way of saying thank you. Both to you (as well as Pro Birth and Life Advocate Feminist! Those two were literally eye opening!) and to Radfems. So sorry for dropping all of this on you, it has just been eating me on the inside for weeks and I think I finally just hit my breaking point.

Right on! The preborn are people and that fact is a threat to the people who wish to hold power over them. Thanks for the submission!!

#answers and submissions #hide

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horizon-verizon · 8 days

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The fact that Green stans are throwing trantums because even TG actors couldn’t say why people should be on their side.

There’s no such thing as “Black propaganda” bffr it’s not medieval times, TG actors are not traditionalist Catholics losers who live in the 15th century like their fans, like besides the far-right and male supremacists, who will willingly admit that usurping women & preventing them from ruling on the sole basis of their gender is the right thing to do ? Especially in a favor of a drunkard rapist ? Besides incels and religious fanatics, how many in 2024 are like: “she’s an evil slut for having sex outside marriage, that’s why she doesn’t deserves to rule, and natural children are inherently evil & don’t deserve rights.” They are not awful people like y’all who support femicide.

Professionally, they are all at some level trying to play into their character and for the viewership's primary mindset towards the situations the story on-screen present/how they interpret them. Most of the audience are "team black" /Team Rhaenyra/team woman or just see through the greens' bullshit. Fandoms are also notoriously much more aggressive, acerbic, and defensive in online fandom and public spaces.

At the same time, you see the actors overwhelmingly seem inclined to not bring up the core of the greens' cause/reason to start a war: women and girls should not be allowed to rule before an available male relative, as direct as possible but unnecessary. Such an idea may be valid or the God's truth for some in the fandom (which has been notoriously and sexistly & vocal since GoT ended) but thankfully, we're in a place in time where people are also very upfront and assertive about their progressive politics, at least the younger generations. And women have much more autonomous legal rights than they have had in past centuries. More people conceive as women as their own unique persons, too, even though yes women's rights are being rolled back in the U.S. as we speak. A lot of that expression is geared towards the absurdity of those rights being rolled back and giving historical/contemporary contextual context or just plain reasoning to de0naturalize those acts.

People are speaking up more about IPV, public day rapes, orchestrated and planned femicides, women getting punched in the face. Women online are expressing their own styles, dreams, and humor, as well as telling women and femme-presenting people to decenter men (or to stop attaching everything they do or think they have to do from the prospect or presence of a man/boy).

So I think that they simply couldn't gun for the slogan of "men-first" without getting positively reamed. Plus, the 1st season really didn't lean into the greens' canonically uber-sexist personas bc the show writers wanted to "equalize" the moral characterizations of the two sides. To either/both the greens as sympathetic or to try to insert more complexity to them than what the already-green-leaning F&B book had down as them being mostly ultra-misogynist advocates for self-ambition and hypocrisy. Even Ewan--Aemond's actor--kept to the eye bit instead of Aemond's "cunny", "whore" comments because of these two things. SO while I think it is fair to not hear the actors as themselves play into the sexism in the promos [bc an actor vs character are two different beings and I don't necessarily want to hear a 21st century famous person say sexist shit], I wish the show and its writing itself played more into more of the expressed sexism rather than just the subtle and one instance of Otto's words to Alicent. again, the show did this to make a "balance" b/t the groups and one glaring effect that happened was that it provided a mask for sexists, pick mes, and dudebros to argue for the greens without just coming out and saying they think girls and women should remain subsidary to men/boys in all aspects of life. Especially as candidates for leadership roles. I've had countless anons try to argue that Rhaenyra wasn't a good enough leader and so she should never had gone to war to reclaim her throne, that Aegon at least had a council he'd listen to and would rule in his name...um, hello, I though that the best sort of ruler was one who had the wherewithal to actually rule?!?! Plus, Aegon's moral character has always been inferior to Rhaenyra and you basically admitting that his leadership qualities is nothing to smile at is you basically whittling down the reason he should be king is bc he happens ot have a penis! Especiaally considering Rhaenyra's supporters outnumbered Aegon's and passionately fought for her even after death. Whereas Aegon was poisoned by his own people. Tg just needs to let things go, for everyone's sake.

#asoiaf asks to me #fandom critical #hotd fandom #green stan nonsense #hotd actors #hotd s2 promos #aegon ii #aegon ii's characterization #fore and blood characters

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cheerfullycatholic · 20 days

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Violence against women is a global scandal that is gaining increasing recognition. While the equal dignity of women may be recognized in words, the inequalities between women and men in some countries remain very serious. Even in the most developed and democratic countries, the concrete social reality testifies to the fact that women are often not accorded the same dignity as men. Pope Francis highlighted this when he affirmed that “the organization of societies worldwide is still far from reflecting clearly that women possess the same dignity and identical rights as men. We say one thing with words, but our decisions and reality tell another story. Indeed, ‘doubly poor are those women who endure situations of exclusion, mistreatment, and violence, since they are frequently less able to defend their rights.’”[83]

Pope St. John Paul II recognized that “much remains to be done to prevent discrimination against those who have chosen to be wives and mothers. […] [T]here is an urgent need to achieve real equality in every area: equal pay for equal work, protection for working mothers, fairness in career advancements, equality of spouses with regard to family rights and the recognition of everything that is part of the rights and duties of citizens in a democratic State.”[84] Indeed, inequalities in these areas are also various forms of violence. He also recalled that “the time has come to condemn vigorously the types of sexual violence which frequently have women for their object and to pass laws which effectively defend them from such violence. Nor can we fail, in the name of the respect due to the human person, to condemn the widespread hedonistic and commercial culture which encourages the systematic exploitation of sexuality and corrupts even very young girls into letting their bodies be used for profit.”[85] Among the forms of violence carried out on women, how can we not mention coercive abortions, which affect both mother and child, often to satisfy the selfishness of males? And how can we not also mention the practice of polygamy? As the Catechism of the Catholic Church reminds us, polygamy is contrary to the equal dignity of women and men; it is also “contrary to conjugal love which is undivided and exclusive.”[86]

In this consideration of violence against women, one cannot condemn enough the phenomenon of femicide. On this front, the entire international community must have a coordinated and concrete commitment, as Pope Francis reiterated, “Our love for Mary must help us to feel appreciation and gratitude for women, for our mothers and grandmothers, who are a bastion in the life in our cities. Almost always in silence, they carry life forward. It is the silence and strength of hope. Thank you for your witness. […] But in thinking of our mothers and grandmothers, I want to invite you to combat a scourge that affects our American continent: the numerous cases where women are killed. And the many situations of violence that are kept quiet behind so many walls. I ask you to fight against this source of suffering by calling for legislation and a culture that repudiates every form of violence.”[87]

Dignitas Infinita, paragraphs 44, 45, and 46

#catholicism #catholic church #church document #dignitas infinita #pope francis

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alpacinogirlfriendofficial · 26 days

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men need to understand that women don't really kill the same way that men do like unprovoked and stuff. they desperately cling to hating women like jodi arias because they want to believe murder is not gendered and that femicide doesn't exist and they use her as proof that women are just as deranged but normal people are able to think that she's probably telling the truth abt him being a pedo. and at the very least he treated her like shit

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sexisdisgusting · 2 months

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(anon from before) im aware its partially because many women in my country think "hey we’re not really oppressed anymore" because we do have it better than women in many other countries, but i think a lot of women simply ignore the misogyny in our country and pretend its not a big deal. theres still no equal pay and mothers are systematically pushed to start working again immediately after birth, we have a high femicide rate and young men are somehow more misogynistic than the older ones. teen girls in prison dont get the same educational opportunities as teen males. i wish more women here opened their eyes and realized the conditions here are far from perfect and we shouldnt stop fighting just because others have it worse. i tell my mother about stuff like the 6b4t movement and we both agree that something like that is unfortunately unlikely to happen on a grand scale in our own country at the moment. im hoping we might make it happen one day though. we both prioritize the women in our lives, i discuss radical feminist points with her sometimes and recommend feminist lit to others when i can. i’ll keep doing my part hoping more women in my country will realize that many things are still fucked up and that we dont deserve that shit. sorry this turned into a vent but it breaks my heart when i think about these things and how many women just accept the cards men deal us. i wish better for all of us.

i love you so much anonita

never apologize for venting to me

i can give you words, but they wont equate to me letting you know i feel you, and love you with everything within me

one day we will be free, sister

i commend you for doing your best to educate the women around you

#asks #anon asks

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toddstool · 2 months

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Hello

I started looking into radical feminism a little over a year ago while I was rebuilding and repairing the damage to my life caused by men. It gave me a sense of belonging and made me think critically about a lot of things I had always taken for granted. I especially enjoyed how everyone seemed to encourage one another to question everything consistently. It was very good for my outlook and mental health.

Over time, the posts seemed to shift from educational to sensational. Im not saying this was the fault of the posters, I’m just saying what I experienced. It went from primarily discussing nuanced topics with no real answer which i thoroughly enjoyed since it encouraged thought, to primarily posts highlighting the depravity of men. I tried to filter these out as the thought of women being brutalized can cause me distress and panic.

The biggest shift, however, happened when I expressed my opinion on female separatism. I am quite pro and strongly believe that it is one of the best things you can do for yourself and your female loved ones. I did not understand in the slightest how women who claimed to be radical feminists could marry a man while continuing to hold their beliefs and values. I expressed this. I was blocked by a few mutuals and even more radfems I had never even spoken to. I knew upon making a “radblr” account that I would be blocked by half of tumblr but I didnt think it would be by the same people preaching to question everything and have open nuanced discussions. I considered deleting then because the website became almost unusable.

Instead, i found other radfems to follow. I became less likely to express an idea i was unsure of. I started step back from radblr as a place of learning and discussion and viewed it as an anonymous social media website. I was overwhelmed with the amount of posts detailing abuse and femicide. I understand that these events need attention for things to change, but as they were it felt more dirty. Like exploiting their stories for rage bait.

So with little to no traction on posts trying to discuss nuanced feminist topics and an overflow of notes on any silly dumb argument post, I, without intending to, began to seek out more fights. I noticed that I became more prone to showing my ass by replying with what i knew would get the most attention. I am not perfect. I crave attention and community like anyone else. When I became aware of what I was doing, I deleted the tumblr app. I felt weirdly empty and only managed to stay off tumblr for about three days. After that three days I saw the “I love men” post that I showed my whole ass on.

After that interaction was done, I started getting anons asking me how I could use the “dont forget your birth control” line since it was so obviously misogynistic and lesbiphobic. This would have been the ideal type of nuanced discussion i love if that’s what it had been. Is that line misogynistic? Why or why not?

But thats not what happened. What did happen was mutuals calling me names and blocking me. Radfems talking about how they always suspected I was lesbiphobic. I guess that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I realized that, at least for that account, everything I enjoyed about radblr was all but lost and everything I hated about the fandom/tra account I had was there. At this point I am just trying to stay off social media entirely, but it has become obvious that I am addicted to it. Pretty evident since I’m even typing this huh?

I may come back. I may not. Idk rn. We’ll see but for right now, I just wanted to tell someone why I deleted. I thought about making a post but that would be kinda dumb right? Haha.

I’d love to find a new place to discuss and philosophize but I dont think social media is the place to do it. Its not whats rewarded here.

Good luck and happy discussion, critical thought, and feminism!

-the blog formerly known as @lookupmedicalmisogyny

*for context: a while ago i made a post asking what happened to lookupmedicalmisogyny and she found it and sent me this anon :)*

not 100% sure if I should or shouldn't post this but hey it's whateva.

i totally agree that a lot of radblrs most popular posts nowadays are ragebait/sensational type posts that feel heavily focused on women's suffering or arguing with others on here, rather than educating or respectful discussions between our community. i don't really mind as I just scroll past stuff like that if I know it'll emotionally stress me out or if I find it uninteresting. these past 2 years anyway I've just used radblr to have fun with my mutuals/keep up with them and have a configurated feed to scroll made up from like-minded and or funny women. of course this works for me because I already got to experience and read well written and thought out posts when i was first getting into radical feminism. i mean one should read theory from genuine essays and books, but you can't disagree that quite a lot of girls and young women are first being introduced to radical feminism from social media ("properly" ig opposed to just thinking about it themselves). i think what a lot of women need are irl communities, and they replace that with online communities, because in person can be scary or difficult to do.

anyway kinda off topic there. i didn't see the post that you're talking about, so I'm not sure about any lesbophobic allegations. im not sure how "don't forget to take your birth control" could be considered lesbophobic according to a radblr prospective so idk 🤔 i do miss your educational posts. i remember them bringing topics to light that I had never known about when i was first getting away from liberal/capitalistic "feminism" that i was indoctrinated into as a kid. perhaps you could have one blog for writing serious/important posts for the feminist community and another more personal one that's for fun and to talk about mutuals. while I don't think online community is exactly the best, I wouldn't entirely discredit it. after all it allows us to connect with women all over the world and learn about their experiences! that's pretty awesome. and i can imagine men don't like the idea of women learning about our historical and worldwide oppression, connecting with women everywhere, and understanding intersectional feminism lol. i guess to sum it up as long as you have in person community that's involved with your local government and helping women near you, then i think online stuff is fine and actually a positive thing as well.

do what u feel is best for yourself! social media can be extremely damaging nowadays so take it easy and I hope everything gets better :·)

#trix talking #radblr #radical feminism #radical feminist community #female separatism #feminism #lookupmedicalmisogyny

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truths89 · 2 months

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Ruminant Conjecture

The difference between a fighter and a warrior is that before I employ my sword, I require permission from above. Although I have wanted to draw blood before I was born, I am guided by intelligent love. _________________________________________________________

If we build a friendship under the pretense that we both deeply value hydration but withhold water from one another, what does this say about our relationship with thirst?

Water is truthful.

There’s something unsteady in your tone. I cannot trust your truth more than my own. _________________________________________________________

We have too many hustlers and not enough warriors. Shining on your competitors, winning a battle, you forget the war. Don’t we love the lore of a boot-strapping American story galore?

Paying a colonial tax is comparable to paying child support to your rapist.

You know—the way slave labor is extracted, in prisons and unskilled labor, akin to the way a neocolonial nation’s resources are exported to be processed and resold to the country of origin? It sounds like Black men dying before they recoup their taxes from Social Security. _________________________________________________________

Ghana and Russia have erected laws to criminalize same-sex love within the constitution of their country—a regressive patriarchal witch-hunt—within decorative despotism; self-autonomy is an enemy to destroy.

I wonder what could be gained if they could apply that focused scrutiny and subjugation to pedophiles and the normalization of femicide. _________________________________________________________

When you share your traumatic psychic wounds about childhood sexual abuse with a friend who was trafficked, you confidently assess that she relayed your emotional nakedness to a mutual friend, a single mother who went radio silent on you. With respect, you understand that protecting your kin, in lieu of a threat, is vital.

The real villains look stainless and wear Febreze.

The tragic thing is when your uncle was your first assailant; for your father, you prayed for forgiveness because every night you were ready to kill and be killed; or the mother who, upon telling your therapist that her crack-addicted boyfriend was actively seeking to molest you, she kicks you out of her house exclaiming that you wanted to be molested and that she didn’t want a faggot for a daughter.

These psychic stains fundamentally rupture your notion of trust. As a bearer of such metaphysical injuries, you accept that any and every entity is capable of unspeakable evil. You do not exempt yourself from this analysis. _________________________________________________________

You know your enemy by their smell; pheromones personify danger; with your first eye, the unseen does not lie.

I thank the universe for my rotation of teachers. I ain’t never been seated in the bleachers. I stay on the court. Life is a hell of a sport. _________________________________________________________

All my wisdom has been earned. I reframe that which I have learned.

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holyluvr · 8 months

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“You won’t be saying that you hate doctors when you need life saving surgery”. Sure, I will.

For starters, similar to “man-haters” and their experiences with men, I have PTSD from repetitive medical and psychiatric abuse and mistreatment. No shit, logically it doesn’t add up to generalize all doctors as horrible. I’m venting from a place that hasn’t been healed and rage at injustices still happening, using my own language that it’s fine if you don’t understand or know what I’m referencing, but I’m aware of this.

I hate the healthcare system, and doctors are their mascots. Man haters usually hate the patriarchy for the trauma it’s allowed men to give them. They hate men by extension of the patriarchy as if to say, “Men are what the patriarchy is based around and who are held free of consequences and responsibility because of it. Men are the mascots of the patriarchy”. Unless they’re sexist on top of the PTSD, they’ll recognize that it’s a social issue that they’re being harsh on from trauma and rage and that anyone born male isn’t inherently dangerous. The misogynistic men were raised in a patriarchal society, but that doesn’t excuse or justify rape, abuse, femicide, and kicking women down to climb higher.

The same for doctors. They’re a product of a fucked up healthcare system and the light of that system shines mostly onto them. So, yeah. I have medical/psychiatric PTSD. I’m not going to trust them even if I’m aware that good doctors, just like good men, exist. I’m going to be on edge because the knowledge of good doctors existing doesn’t work in the present when you don’t have any around you and have only met dangerous ones.

Secondly, but most importantly, life-saving surgeries and treatments were incorrectly used on people in my family, killed my sister, and dangerous mistakes were made with me that there’s almost no excuse to have made while in ER rooms, and those workers had zero excuse— which was maybe why I wasn’t told about it and found out after I was released. Unless they’re so bad at being ER workers that they simply forgot 🤪😋 to tell a 22 year old that I started to have a heart attack and showed signs of organ failure! Silly mistake on their end.

Nurses either are exceptionally bold or don’t realize that patients can hear them gossiping at the reception desk. I have heard 2 nurses/techs say that I was better off dead when I was a teenager because they thought I was still drugged in the room they were leaning against for their little conversation on how they’d disown their child if they harmed themselves so selfishly like I had(My mother snapped from stress and told me to kill myself. That’s why she did not answer her phone nor show up at the hospital when I was being transferred, but sure since y’all know-it-all).

It’s like how my father scoffs and says, “Who would you call if you were raped?”(🤡 he’s gotta be in denial about how much of a pig he is) when I make a comment about not trusting the sherif. I wouldn’t call them because the times that law enforcement were involved were traumatizing with no positive outcome.

The doctors in hospitals who asked about it did nothing about it either besides write it in my files that I have a history of sexual abuse— ignoring that it was ongoing and probably needed some legal or social work support. The only focus brought towards that was using it to say why I must be LGBT+/GNC. Just like with the law enforcement, it was weaponized against a child and used to further focus on sexualizing said gay child.

No. I wouldn’t have my trust in a doctor to save my life because my experiences with healthcare workers are eerily similar to law enforcement. And many of them are cruel and petty alike law enforcement while on the clock.

I’d have to hope and pray that I survive whatever they’re doing to me and that it doesn’t permanently harm me because they got distracted by other orders or didn’t want to use expensive equipment or didn’t want to admit they have no experience with something a diff specialist needs to be called in for or don’t think someone like me should exist in an ideal society,…

Or their version of what sounds exactly like the “Poor me, forced into insanity and murder because I had no choice but to look after this failure of a burdensome human everyday or kill them!” caregiver burnout murder case defenses, as if caregiver burnout itself by caregivers of highest level needs disabled people justifies abuse or murder. It does not! You can quit being a carer before you decide to abuse or kill the disabled human you’re caring for! Just like you can divorce your wife instead of abusing and killing her! Seriously, what the fuck? 😀 Ahaha. I understand pride is a problem, but what the fuck? Just like these cases, you can and should quit being a healthcare worker or put it on hold indefinitely if you start acting abusive or selfish on the job.

I was in hospitals more than school growing up. People used to argue with my parents about how they were letting strangers raise me. It’s not like I became physically disabled a few years ago and entered the world of doctors to see a few new horrors. I was raised in that system.

You think they did a good job? This is how the end result of people educated in child psychology and pediatrics talking to a child more than any other demographic should be? It’s a bit off base imo to come at me for what’s seen as hysteric and insane takes on doctors when they told me who to be. They and my mother chose what I ate, what pills I took, what I was allowed to say, what I was allowed to believe, who I could be friends with if I dared speak to anyone, how much time outside I was allowed to get,…

Do people think I was born a snakey and insensitive bastard? I spent my life so far metaphorically figuring out puzzles to locks on doors that kept getting more difficult every time I managed to open them in rooms without windows. Then I saw that I was just in a damn hallway with my mother that lead me right into an identical room owned by doctors. Over and over again. That’s been my growing up. None of my doctors gave a single damn about my health or the abuse I had been through.

I won’t trust a doctor. I’d have no other options of who to turn to. Letting someone die is illegal, so as soon as you lose consciousness, doctors can legally treat you even if you said no— but it’s like making a deal with someone who could be the Devil and not knowing what will happen.

I love doctors. I respect their work, and the concept of healthcare is important to me. Doctors are usually my favorite characters in anything. They were my only idea of who I felt OK looking up to and basing my ideals on.

I don’t trust them nor their workers and connections and tools anymore at the same time, and I think that’s fair to say, especially right now, as an adult trying to heal out of everything they’ve told me about myself. I don’t think it contradicts to say that the concept of working-healthcare practices in place is admirable to me while the real, corrupt industry it’s turned into is Hell.

When I hear the word, “mother”. My first thought is my biological mother. Then memories of psychologists and therapists come to mind all the same. If you say “father”, my first thought is my biological father. Then memories of psychiatrists and techs. I think, for myself, I at least have a better idea than anyone else on my experiences with healthcare workers.

Healthcare workers traumatizing me and killing people in my family doesn’t mean they didn’t save or majorly better the QOL of someone else. Personal bias or better treatment of who they like. State regulations. Cultural differences. The existence of doctors who are doing everything in their power to hold the pillar up while their coworkers long let it go in defeatism, propaganda and erasure in education, socioeconomic stress, stress from higher-ups in control of funding, or whom never really cared and prioritized lives in the first place.

“That’s just how it is”/“Theres nothing in my power to do” is something both my parents and therapists have said to me while looking downcast and defeated when I’ve questioned why they hurt me, themselves, others, or let it happen with others.

A lot of people have heard that from adults as children and were pissed or hurt every time. “Life is unfair, get over it”. That mindset. That language and standby on violence that goes with it. The refusal to stand up for a child asking for Justice.

Full offense at every person who has said that while on the job or to a child when I say this….How much of a fucking coward do you have to be to look at someone smaller than you and injured from people on equal footing with you and say that? If you really think you aren’t being a POS coward, say it louder while looking the kid in the eyes, and don’t apologize or sound apologetic along with it. Do you give a fuck or not? Does it bother you or not? Do you have issue being associated with that or not?

Just like my parents, the same with doctors. Nothing is more frightening than someone in power over you who is unpredictable and goes back and forth between what they say and how they act. Especially when they hold unhealthy attitudes or are outright abusive.

#…#drs rlly will tell themselves that there’s a huge boom in paranoid and difficult disrespectful patients and be like ‘nothing to do w/ us’#as if healthcare stability isn’t like. the pillar of society doing ok #nah everyone is hysteric and junkies who wanna make their lives and work sooooo much harder and annoying and gross 🤮#***long ptsd posting u know how it is ahahaha Dr appt days med days ooooh man #but LOL how people think I wouldn’t have any idea of how doctors think and feel….do you know who my ‘friends’ were growing up? fuck off.#idk how many therapy sessions meant for me were spent on drs tangenting about their job like ok but I’m 15 and idk why I want to die so

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asongofstarkandtargaryen · 11 months

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There are real cases where the defense counsel will argue that men who murdered their “evil” wives, wives that were nasty or toxic, should have reduced charges. This is why I get so fed up with fans who say Cersei deserved to be abused by Robert or Daenerys’s death wasn’t intimate partner violence. The “oh he just snapped due to her sadistic behavior” being a common defense that men’s defense attorneys use to argue for a charge of 1st or 2nd degree murder to be dropped to the 3rd degree or manslaughter. And this is not just a thing of the ancient past when Blackstone wrote his heavy tomes on English law. As recently as Girouard v. State (1991), in Maryland, THE UNITED STATES, this rule is cited as a valid reason to reduce a homicide charge to manslaughter (Steven Girouard stabbed his wife 19 times after a verbal argument ensued and was infuriated by his wife’s taunting and insulting words).

And same for people who think Cersei committing adultery is a genuine reason for her to be murdered or harmed (I would never tell a wife-beater that his wife has a lover and bastards but that’s just me). In the common law, it was once normal for men who murdered their wives to get away with it, or have reduced charges, because of “sudden discovery of a spouse’s adultery.” To this day, there are many countries in the world where a husband, brother, or father is legally permitted to commit an honor killing against a wife, sister, daughter, or girlfriend, if she “strays” or commits a sexual folly.

I really don’t give a single fuck if people hate Cersei and Daenerys, but they need to stop parroting objectively male supremacist, violently patriarchal rhetoric to justify their insanity over fictional characters. Do people know how horrifying it is that “bad and evil women deserve gendered violence, including rape and femicide” is a normal take, even on The Left ?

Domestic violence is one of society's biggest problems. Unfortunately, many women are victims of domestic abuse.

I'm not an American but I'm aware of the Girouard v State and I consider it a prime example of how female victims are mistreated even in courts of justice; even long after their death.

In my country (Greece) there is a rise on femicide incidents the last few years. (the article is two years old but saldy also applies today). Here we are get mocked even when we used the word "femicide" because according to plenty of people that's a "radical feminist word that shouldn't exist". I know that my country's experience isn't unique. Femicide is a global issue.

There are countries in the world where honor killings of women still exist, have to marry their rapists, are forced married (sometimes from a very young age), are not allowed to dress as they want, they don't have access to education etc.

Some people think that those are scenarios that only happen in historical or pseudo-historical-fantasy books. But the truth is that this is reality for many of our sisters.

I really have no sympathy or tolerance towards people who praise male supermasist rhethoric or who held patriarchal views. Especially when they hide it behind the typical "it's period appropriate to be a bigotry" Bullshit, Karen! Even if the character from a show/book series/comic has awful behavior based on the historical era they come from that doesn't mean that you, who are consumming the content in 2023, have to make excuses for bigotry.

#violence against women #sexism #asoiaf ask

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