#sexism

[vexingwoman]

One of the things that makes arguing with men so much more draining than arguing with women is the unequal distribution of credibility and contribution.

Somehow, whenever I argue with men, it always falls upon me to both prove my own claims, and to disprove his, while he does neither; his only obligation seemingly to dole out whatever ungrounded assertions he conjures up on the spot. Somehow, it is always wordlessly established that anything I say is false until proven true, while anything he says is true until proven false.

This same dynamic happened again over on tiktok, when a man claimed women are just as violent as men. Automatically, almost as if by muscle memory, I offered up the usual statistics on male depravity: men constituting 99% of rapists, 99% of mass shooters, 98% of killers, 95% of serious domestic abusers. And his only response was to say those statistics were wrong. No elaboration; wrong simply because he said so.

I already knew how the entire conversation would pan out: I’d give him my source, he’d find a reason to discredit the source, then I’d scour the internet to find a source that suited his standards, which he’d inevitably find a reason to discredit too.

So instead I simply said, “Prove the statistics are wrong.” And that was the only thing I responded with henceforth: prove it, prove I’m wrong, prove you’re right. Thus reversing the dynamics and positing that anything I said was true unless he demonstrated otherwise; unduly putting all the onus on him while I did nothing other than decide whether he was convincing me of claims thoroughly enough—and if he wasn’t, it just meant I was winning, of course.

He blocked me, and so far so have all the other men I’ve used this approach on. I don’t know whether it’s because they couldn’t actually disprove my claims or because they couldn’t stand to be treated the same way they treat women in debates. But I think more women should do this. Stop wasting energy proving your points to men, and start making them prove theirs to you.

#radical feminism #misogny #sexism

[twoyara]

Men's phrase, "the worst thing she'll do is say no," proves in how much different worlds we live and how much they don't care about our comfort (no they're not blind, they just don't care).

Because it's the truth, isn't it? What else is there to do? Even me as a rabid man-hater and sapphic woman who has been Thai boxing for years, I wouldn't beat and maim them. Why would I do that? First of all, as a woman, a human being, unlike men, I don't see any point in violence.

Even so we rarely say no. Most often it's some stupid excuse like "Oh, I already have a boyfriend/husband". Because men never take "no" as an answer. The only thing that stops them is knowing that you, as a thing, already have another owner. Although that doesn't stop some men. There's a famous phrase: he won't know. Fucking idiots.

And it's kind of dangerous for women to say no. You don't know how these animals will react to rejection. A lot of women after this got stalkers who literally watch their every move. Sometimes refusal can be accompanied by beating, rape, threats and even death.

We live in different worlds. Where for others the worst outcome is "no", for others it's death.

#radblr #radical feminism #radical feminist community #sexism #i hate men

[kthulhu42]

Its not a normal female experience to hate being seen as a girl by society this much, and to feel so trapped living as a woman. It's also not normal to hate men and trans people this much, do you think perhaps such hatred could come from jealousy? I feel like you might be a lot happier if you transitioned. Imagine dressing in men's clothing, and being called a guy by your freinds, imagine people who are attracted to men finding you handsome, imagine people complimenting you as you slowly look more and more like a cute boy. I feel like you'd be a happy boy, you'd be a sweet boy, you'd be a handsome boy...

Oh, you're back again

Sorry, only weak minded moids are susceptible to sissy hypnosis shit. It doesn't work on normal people. I also have no interest in compliments from others, or having others find me cute or handsome. I have this thing called self esteem, and I only care about the opinions of the people I'm close to. I have no need for validation from people on the internet- I'm not a parking ticket. Validation is unnecessary.

"It's not normal to hate men and trans people this much" ahhh, so you're concerned for the feelings of men above all. The TRA is an MRA after all.

Also, there is nothing wrong with being a female. My problem is misogynists, like you, who value men above all else. Dealing with misogyny is the problem, not being female. And that is something no TIF can run from. So I'll meet your bullshit head on.

#radblr #radical feminism #terfblr #feminism #sexism #gender critical #Imagine thinking “You'd be so cute” is an effective argument to a 30 year old woman #I own a house and a chainsaw and have a husband and kid - wtf is being cute going to do for me #But they're obsessed with looks so they can't see the value in actual human traits

[but-a-humble-goon]

You ever think it's screwed up how to some people it's not enough for a female character to be just a good person, she has to be actively heroic or else she's immoral and unrelatable? Like, Bayonetta and classic Lara Croft are two characters I would call good people but not necessarily heroes (as in they usually don't set out to help people or make the world better they just do their own thing and usually a save the world plot just sorta happens to them) and I've seen so many people call both of them "morally grey" or ambiguous and it's like... bitch where? Is it because violence is wrong? In which case someone better tell all the men that.

#lara croft #tomb raider #bayonetta #gaming #sexism #videogames

[animentality]

#twitter #south korea #4b movement #feminism #sexism #misogyny

[reasonsforhope]

Sometimes you just have one of those moments where the progress we've made as a culture get thrown into stark relief. You look at something and go "Holy shit, that would never have happened when I was a kid."

Today, I had one of those moments when I realized that the teenage boys I'm working with are just. genuinely, openly enthusiastic about going to Build-a-Bear for their outing.

These are sixteen and seventeen year old boys! They just had a whole conversation about what to name their "cute", mostly new squishmallows! They're genuinely excited that they're going to Build-a-Bear this weekend and asking other kids to pick up specific accessories for them!!

Holy shit, that never would've happened when I was 16. None of the boys would have dared to be visibly interested - and neither would most of the girls! There would have been a million gay jokes and "Haha, you're a girl" jokes and "What are you, a baby?" jokes. Teenagers weren't even supposed to care about anything back then!

Less than 15 years later, and I'm watching three 17 year old boys treat all that as not even worthy of comment.

So let's call that a reason for hope. Even when the kids aren't alright, in some ways apparently they are alright. Go Gen Z, honestly. It's so lovely to watch you guys just openly doing and saying stuff that, when I was a teen, would've been a social death sentence.

#obligatory disclaimer that this really really obviously is not universal #I do live in a major progressive city #there's definitely a level of a liberal bubble effect here #but it's still really powerful to see it #because even in a major liberal enclave there were so many limits on the gender roles and homophobia etc. etc. fronts #and also the limits of the oppressive weight of obligatory teen apathy lol #seriously go gen z. so glad you guys decided cringe is dead. I love you for that so much #and I love it for you #not news #life #hope #homophobia #sexism #teens #teenagers #progress #gen z #btw if it wasn't clear I'm a #millennial #plush toy #plushie #squishmallows #build a bear #stuffed animal #like the idea of almost any teenager much less teenage boys #saying IN FRONT OF THEIR PEERS #that they are excited about their STUFFED ANIMALS #when I was a teenager #????? #cannot imagine that ever happening.

[theotherpacman]

OH AND ANOTHER THING ABOUT THE ATLA REBOOT

the sexism thing??? we all know it's fucking stupid and purely performative to take out sokka's feminism arc, but can we talk about the fact that He Is Still Sexist????? he still thinks that what he does (running the village's defenses, which they've never needed) is vastly more important than what she does (wash the clothes, cook, etc). and yk what?? the live action reboot AGREES with him. it doesn't show or even mention katara doing any work around the village. all we see katara doing is practice waterbending - the only interesting thing that original episode 1 sokka seems to think katara ever does.

the live action show depicts sokka "doing all the work", fulfilling his traditionally masculine role of warrior/protector, and COMPLETELY DISMISSES whatever "women's work" katara does, as if she does nothing. seems pretty clear to me that the showrunners would love to absolve themselves of sexism by not talking about sexism, while in actuality being pretty sexist themselves

and don't even get me started on sokka not wearing the dress/makeup of the kyoshi warriors' uniform

#fucked up #hate it #sexism #patriarchy #atla #atla netflix #atla live action #atla sokka #avatar the last airbender

[cocklessboy]

The biggest male privilege I have so far encountered is going to the doctor.

I lived as a woman for 35 years. I have a lifetime of chronic health issues including chronic pain, chronic fatigue, respiratory issues, and neurodivergence (autistic + ADHD). There's so much wrong with my body and brain that I have never dared to make a single list of it to show a doctor because I was so sure I would be sent directly to a psychologist specializing in hypochondria (sorry, "anxiety") without getting a single test done.

And I was right. Anytime I ever tried to bring up even one of my health issues, every doctor's initial reaction was, at best, to look at me with doubt. A raised eyebrow. A seemingly casual, offhand question about whether I'd ever been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. Even female doctors!

We're not talking about super rare symptoms here either. Joint pain. Chronic joint pain since I was about 19 years old. Back pain. Trouble breathing. Allergy-like reactions to things that aren't typically allergens. Headaches. Brain fog. Severe insomnia. Sensitivity to cold and heat.

There's a lot more going on than that, but those were the things I thought I might be able to at least get some acknowledgement of. Some tests, at least. But 90% of the time I was told to go home, rest, take a few days off work, take some benzos (which they'd throw at me without hesitation), just chill out a bit, you'll be fine. Anxiety can cause all kinds of odd symptoms.

Anyone female-presenting reading this is surely nodding along. Yup, that's just how doctors are.

Except...

I started transitioning about 2.5 years ago. At this point I have a beard, male pattern baldness, a deep voice, and a flat chest. All of my doctors know that I'm trans because I still haven't managed to get all the paperwork legally changed, but when they look at me, even if they knew me as female at first, they see a man.

I knew men didn't face the same hurdles when it came to health care, but I had no idea it was this different.

The last time I saw my GP (a man, fairly young, 30s or so), I mentioned chronic pain, and he was concerned to see that it wasn't represented in my file. Previous doctors hadn't even bothered to write it down. He pushed his next appointment back to spend nearly an hour with me going through my entire body while I described every type of chronic pain I had, how long I'd had it, what causes I was aware of. He asked me if I had any theories as to why I had so much pain and looked at me with concerned expectation, hoping I might have a starting point for him. He immediately drew up referrals for pain specialists (a profession I didn't even know existed till that moment) and physical therapy. He said depending on how it goes, he may need to help me get on some degree of disability assistance from the government, since I obviously shouldn't be trying to work full-time under these circumstances.

Never a glimmer of doubt in his eye. Never did he so much as mention the word "anxiety".

There's also my psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with ADHD last year (meeting me as a man from the start, though he knew I was trans). He never doubted my symptoms or medical history. He also took my pain and sleep issues seriously from the start and has been trying to help me find medications to help both those things while I go through the long process of seeing other specialists. I've had bad reactions to almost everything I've tried, because that's what always happens. Sometimes it seems like I'm allergic to the whole world.

And then, just a few days ago, the most shocking thing happened. I'd been wondering for a while if I might have a mast cell condition like MCAS, having read a lot of informative posts by @thebibliosphere which sounded a little too relatable. Another friend suggested it might explain some of my problems, so I decided to mention it to the psychiatrist, fully prepared to laugh it off. Yeah, a friend thinks I might have it, I'm not convinced though.

His response? That's an interesting theory. It would be difficult to test for especially in this country, but that's no reason not to try treatments and see if they are helpful. He adjusted his medication recommendations immediately based on this suggestion. He's researching an elimination diet to diagnose my food sensitivities.

I casually mentioned MCAS, something routinely dismissed by doctors with female patients, and he instantly took the possibility seriously.

That's it. I've reached peak male privilege. There is nothing else that could happen that could be more insane than that.

I literally keep having to hold myself back from apologizing or hedging or trying to frame my theories as someone else's idea lest I be dismissed as a hypochondriac. I told the doctor I'd like to make a big list of every health issue I have, diagnosed and undiagnosed, every theory I've been given or come up with myself, and every medication I've tried and my reactions to it - something I've never done because I knew for a fact no doctor would take me seriously if they saw such a list all at once. He said it was a good idea and could be very helpful.

Female-presenting people are of course not going to be surprised by any of this, but in my experience, male-presenting people often are. When you've never had a doctor scoff at you, laugh at you, literally say "I won't consider that possibility until you've been cleared by a psychologist" for the most mundane of health problems, it might be hard to imagine just how demoralizing it is. How scary it becomes going to the doctor. How you can internalize the idea that you're just imagining things, making a big deal out of nothing.

Now that I'm visibly a man, all of my doctors are suddenly very concerned about the fact that I've been simply living like this for nearly four decades with no help. And I know how many women will have to go their whole lives never getting that help simply because of sexism in the medical field.

If you know a doctor, show them this story. Even if they are female. Even if they consider themselves leftists and feminists and allies. Ask them to really, truly, deep down, consider whether they really treat their male and female patients the same. Suggest that the next time they hear a valid complaint from a male patient, imagine they were a woman and consider whether you'd take it seriously. The next time they hear a frivolous-sounding complaint from a female patient, imagine they were a man and consider whether it would sound more credible.

It's hard to unlearn these biases. But it simply has to be done. I've lived both sides of this issue. And every doctor insists they treat their male and female patients the same. But some of the doctors astonished that I didn't get better care in the past are the same doctors who dismissed me before.

I'm glad I'm getting the care I need, even if it is several decades late. And I'm angry that it took so long. And I'm furious that most female-presenting people will never have this chance.

#transgender #queer #transmasc #lgbtqia+ #trans man #sexism #medical sexism #feminism #male privilege

[vexingwoman]

“The world taught woman nothing skillful and then said her work was valueless. It permitted her no opinions and then said she did not know how to think. It forbade her to speak in public, and said the sex had no orators. It denied her the schools, and said the sex had no genius. It robbed her of every vestige of responsibility, and then called her weak. It taught her that every pleasure must come as a favor from men, and when to gain it she decked herself in paint and fine feathers, as she had been taught to do, it called her vain.”

-Carrie Chapman Catt, 1902

#radical feminism #misogony #sexism

[anarcho-smarmyism]

the way that "Karen" originally meant primarily white women using ther privilege to abuse people of color and service workers and the internet turned it into a stand-in for "bitch"...... the way that "NLOG" originally meant girls and women who performatively separate themselves from femininity and put down other women out of internalized misogyny but the internet turned it into a stand-in for their lesbophobic or transphobic slur of choice for masculine women.....the way "manic pixie dream girl" was originally a critique of a sexist trope in fiction and the internet turned it into a way to insult real life girls and women for being weird or quirky....never fucking ending

#sexism #misogyny #theres a version of this with white ppl appropriating aave but im not the guy to write that one #feminism #genderfluid

[silvermoon424]

One of my favorite genres of post is one man being like "the female orgasm doesn't exist. I would know, I've had sex with a number of women and they are BIOLOGICALLY INCAPABLE of achieving orgasm" and then a bunch of other guys show up to roast him

#'water boarding couldn't have gotten this outta me' is one of my all-time favorite lines btw #sexism #misogyny #feminism #guys being dudes #funny #1k #5k

[kthulhu42]

"Females can't help but display their sexuality" - you mean you can't look at parts of our normal, natural bodies without sexually objectifying them. Because you are porn-addled.

#radblr #radical feminism #feminism #sexism #Literally just control yourself

[daughter-of-sapph0]

I think that all terfs who call themselves "females" should watch this video

#dostxt #sexism #misogny #racism #misogynior

[theconcealedweapon]

Parent: "If you stand up for yourself, you're disrespectful."

Parent: "If you don't stand up for yourself, you're not a real man."

Parent: "Where did I go wrong? I did the best I could."

#child abuse #gender norms #sexism #authoritarian parenting

[bikini-kill-pilled]

when women claim men don't have the same emotional capacity as us, i think it's untrue and more importantly letting them off easy. throughout history men have written insightful poems and novels on the human experience or on how "love conquers all", but digging deeper reveals they were still sexist assholes--men definitely have the same emotional intelligence as women (we're in the same species so obviously) but they simply teach themselves that women are the ones who aren't deserving of their empathy. this is why "nice guys" and the men you know are still as dangerous as the strangers you don't know; it has nothing to do with their moral compasses. it's just that no matter how virtuous they are, that virtue is more often than not entirely closed off to women.

#sorry for the man hating rambles #chirping text #radblr #radical feminism #radical feminists do interact #radical feminist safe #radical feminist #gender critical #radical feminist community #gender criticism #radical feminists do touch #sexism #male violence #misandry