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#as you would. you need to accept that ppl are different and not everyone wants to do things in the same way you do them
allisonlol · 11 months
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chuuya dazai and fyodor when reader tries to remove the hickies they gave reader the next day OHKYIGOAHSS
a/n: hiii everyone i have crawled out of my void to offer you this post !! ty to the anon who came up with this wonderful idea. i've missed posting omg and we somehow are so close to 3k despite my inactivity??? slay. shall open reqs again once we get there mwehehe
warnings: slight nsfw
(Chuuya, Dazai, Fyodor) When You Try to Remove Hickeys
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Chuuya
he's gonna be the most chill about this tbh
it's your body and if you don't want ppl seeing that on you then that's ur choice!!
however
hiding them is one thing, but that doesn't mean he wants to see you removing them
so yknow that hack where you take a whisk and like,,,twist it over the mark to get rid of it?
yeah so you tried that...and it was actually working until chuuya barged into the room and demanded to know what you were doing
bro is not happy to see the hickies he'd proudly left on you last night being somehow removed by a WHISK
grabs that mf thing and throws it across the room
chuuya's not angry at you, more so frustrated and insecure?? cuz like why would u wanna get rid of them
he's lowkey gonna start pouting tbh. won't say anything else but will glare & give u silent treatment
won't stop until you admit the only reason u removed them is because it was too visible with your work uniform and u didn't want everyone staring smh
insist that he should give you more in areas that people won't see and there's no guarantee y'all won't be late to work <3
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Dazai
oh lord
so dazai really loves to mark you up
and last night was no different. your neck was black and blue with hickies
deadass to the point where you nearly had a heart attack when you saw it in the morning
"how am i gonna go to work like this?!" you practically sob to him while he LAUGHS
his only advice is "then don't go" as if both of y'all don't need to have ur asses at the agency in 20 minutes
you check ur phone for the time and when u see this you panic and sprint to your shared bedroom
you try everything you can think of to cover them
first you hastily layer concealer on your neck, to no avail as the marks were too dark
then digging through ur closet for clothes with a high enough neckline to hide it, to which you found none
whole time dazai is leaning against the doorframe, watching ur meltdown with an amused expression
he approaches and helps u up from the floor where u had collapsed with all the clothes strewn around you ☹️
"allow me to pick out something for you to wear" ….oh god
u guys are beyond late at this point so you sigh and accept defeat, to which dazai picks a shirt that of course displays all the marks on your neck
you got lots of stares that day to say the least
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Fyodor
surprisingly fyodor doesn't usually leave too many marks on you to begin with
he's got that old fashioned take where it's like "other people don't need to see that and be in our business" if u know what i mean
however, he is also a very possessive man
^so when he gets worked up and does leave hickeys on you, the last thing he wants to see is you trying to hide or remove them
which is exactly what he walked in on u doing today
you were trying the good old "rub an ice cube on it" hack before u had to work
now this mf thinks you have some hidden agenda as to why you wanted them gone
"are you seeing someone else" 💀💀
PLS u didn't realize he had been watching from the doorway and this scares u so bad u drop the ice cube down ur shirt
u start frantically trying to get it out of ur shirt while yelling at him like "i have to work, wtf are u talking about???"
u immediately stop tho when he storms up to u and grabs your face to make you look at him
his face is so cold and unreadable omg it's scary
his eyes shift to the marks on your neck as he traces over them with his fingers
"leave these alone" he says lowly, then adjusts the collar of your shirt so they are partially covered
neither of u will say anything more about it after that, but fyodor sends sigma to secretly follow u to work to make sure that's where ur really going 😓
taglist: @deadmitochondria @miycutie @chuuyasboots @shy-socially-awkward-intovert @beandaifuku @stygianoir @sonder-paradise @irethepotato @serenareiss @ashthemadwriter @mrsdostoevsky @creamygojo @mianqo
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sl-ut · 6 months
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random college!abby hcs
more!college abby
warnings: mentions of sex, drinking, drugs, and nudity, cursing, mild hint homophobia
first things first: jerry is alive and abby is his pride and joy
i'm serious... her mom died when she was a toddler and jerry hasn't had a long-term relationship since, so he's the only parental figure that she has
he took every precaution while raising her to make sure she always had everything she could ever need while also making sure that she didn't end up being an entitled brat
otherwise, she is very close with both of her father's siblings (her aunt is the only maternal relationship she has and definitely relied on her for all of her personal issues as a teenager), has a good relationship with jerry's mother and step-father
her mother was an only child, but her parents always come over for thanksgiving and even christmas sometimes
she was very supportive of her father taking in yara and lev after she moved out. she knew he was suffering from a severe case of empty nest syndrome. she def makes them feel so welcome right away like those strangers became her siblings in a matter of minutes
i'll only say it once ppl: OLD MONEY
jk i'll say it again. the andersons are a long line of surgeons and doctors so obvi they're gonna be well off
like, not "fund a research facility to get my kid into college" rich, they're more "i casually have a summer home, a ski chalet, and a ridiculously nice house to live in year round" rich.
her only real relationship was in high school (trigger warning: it was owen)
our bby had a bad case of comphet as a teenager
like fr she had not even considered the fact that she might be gay until she was two knuckles deep in some sorority girl during a party in her freshman year
after that she sort of just accepted it, she had no concern of her dad bc obviously he would be so accepting and supportive, but a few of her relatives def had an issue with it right off the bat (old money, old values)
she's been friends with manny, nora, owen, and mel since middle school, and the only one whose view of her seemed to change was owen (and mel too ig bc she stopped seeing abby as such a threat)
he drunkenly questioned her about it once, saying something super gross and along the lines of "you didn't seem gay when we were together"
to which she responded by offering him two choices; he could sit down and shut up or she would knock him tf out
he's cooled it since then but everyone knows that he still has a big fat crush on her so he still wants to believe he has a chance (even tho he was literally already talking to mel before they broke up and announced they were together only a few days after)
she's pre-med, majoring in bio and minoring in something totally different like classical lit or history or something
she's gonna end up being an orthopedic surgeon but later on in her career i can see her turning to teaching at a university or something
like doctor!abby turned prof!abby???? omg
is very health conscious
she's a gym rat, this we already know
she also takes her diet very seriously as well, but always has a secret stash of junk for when she really needs it
also careful with her alcohol/drug intake
she drinks on occasion (birthday, christmas, new years, etc, etc) but usually not very much (will almost always be sober enough to be the sober driver if need be)
she refuses to do any drugs during lacrosse season. she's so strict with her diet during the season that she won't ingest anything other than quality, nutritious food. she also needs to submit a drug test a few times per season so she doesn't wanna risk it.
in the off season, she's more willing to have a puff or two at a party or take an edible before a movie night or something (i don't see her doing any drug other than weed)
she lived with manny during her freshman and sophomore years
they had a shitty little apartment a few minutes away from campus
it was the only one that manny could afford on a student budget, and he refused abby's offer to get a nicer apartment and let her pay a larger portion of the rent than he did
they still had fun either way
manny loved having another person he could talk about girls with (he was initially gonna move in with owen but then he got ditched for mel)
every sunday morning they would get takeout for breakfast so manny could recount his night with the girl that had snuck out only a few hours earlier
she was a little hesitant to join in and share her own stories, but she finally got more comfortable in talking to him about it (RESPECTFULLY!!!!!!! she was so scared that she was gonna end up sounding like a literally disgusting pig but she keeps the details to a minimum and only says nice things unless the girl was a major bitch)
she's a lululemon/gymshark girly. her go-to style is definitely any variation of athlesiure. she wears lots of joggers, dry-fit tops, and the cleanest pair of white sneakers you'll ever see
underneath, i'm picturing her as more of a bralette type of girl. obviously she wears a sports bra to the gym, but on a regular basis, she likes wearing bralettes over bras bc she doesn't need that much support so they offer just enough without the discomfort of a bra
i'm settling the debate rn everyone, college!abby wears boxers AND panties
she finds boxers more comfortable on a day to day basis, but she likes wearing cheekies and thongs especially when she's wearing leggings
so dorky
she was definitely a sci-fi/fantasy kid
she grew up on harry potter, lord of the rings, star wars, etc etc
would love a partner who would watch them with her and actually enjoy it
unironically makes gym thirst traps on tiktok
her followers always comment supportive things like: looking good!, major gainssss, muscle mommy come destroy this pu-
still wears the iconic braid, but usually only when she's on the field. she occasionally wears her hair down, but i hc that she still likes to wear her hair pulled back in a cute little braided ponytail or a messy low bun
when she's older SHE CUTS HER HAIR OMG OMG OMG like literally i'm purring rn
like ik you've all seen that edit of her with super short hair omg she's so hot
in her junior year she decided to live on her own
manny moved in with jordan, who had been begging him for a while since the rent was more than he could handle on his own, though manny's rent would actually be cheaper than it was in his apartment with abby
they still do their traditions tho, still having sunday breakfast, still going to the campus pub on fridays for trivia, still going to the gym together on wednesdays...
they're actually besties i love them
when she's on her period, she craves salty foods
is so frustratingly confident in her emotions
will always try to diffuse the situation and pissing the other person off with her calmness
takes really good care of her skin
her favourite drink is diet cranberry gingerale
she's a dog person, but she would definitely enjoy having a cat around too
adopts a rescue dog a few weeks after finishing her residency
uses old spice fiji body wash and deodorant (SHE SMELLS SO FUCKING GOOD) and a musky vanilla body spray
likes to feel and be clean, but isn't too fussed about her body hair so long as it looks tidy. she isn't anti shaving, and will probably make an effort to shave more regularly in the early stages of a relationship until she's more confident and comfortable around the person
NSFW
down-there hair? duh
like i said, she likes to keep things tidy so she'll trim and maybe shave her bikini line if she's feeling it but that's it. she's not fussed with body hair, whether it's her or her partner's
again, she'll make an effort to keep herself looking neat and tidy for the first bit of a relationship but after a few weeks she's not afraid to go full-bush when she doesn't wanna shave
she doesn't love penetration. fingers are one thing, but she has only had not-so-great experiences with sex that involved a penis-like object. she'd wanna be the one wearing the strap for the most part, but she'd be willing to try it again with the right person
slow and passionate sex >>>>>
considers herself to be very vanilla but she's actually kinda kinkyyyyy (she gets so embarrassed and blushy when anyone calls her out for it)
she prefers scissoring to using her strap (but she LOVES her strap)
she doesn't like to choke her partners, but she will reach her hand up and just hold their throat while they're fucking
she's always so sensitive
came in like thirty seconds during her first time with another girl
she's noiiiiisssyyyyyyyy
she usually starts out with just heavy panting breaths, then they turn into deep grunts, then she begins to whine from low in her throat, and finally she begins to gasp out words of praise or curses
she squirts teehee
like i said she's always so sensitive, so if she's any ways worked up when someone's going down on her they better watch out bc they're in the splash zone
her strap is purple and sparkly
abby anderson eats ass
her nipples are super sensitive too
not really nsfw but she really loves casual nudity with her partners, changing in front of each other, hopping in the shower together, using the bathroom with the other person in the room...
she's a boob girl. doesn't matter if they're big, small, saggy, or perky, she just wants to suck them
when she's on top, she likes to pull her partner's leg over her shoulder and will just start like trailing kisses along the length of their calf
she's a literal munch
will use it to her advantage too
tells her partner she'll go down on them if they finish their assignments
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fuxuannie · 1 year
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Whaaa i love ur writing style!! Could I ask for Sampo, Gepard and Dan Heng with a very shy reader? 🥺🙏
I just love those three!!
* pairing(s) : various hsr x gender neutral reader ( plus a joke-ish caelus prompt since ppl seem to like him !!!)
* prompt : request ♡
* authors note : thank you all so much for the overwhelming amount of support recently omg ♡ you're all so sweet, and it means the world. feel free to send requests, msgs and the sort my way!
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DAN HENG understood your shyness, and was always there for you in situations where it really shone through. Especially in social settings, where you'd just cling onto his arm behind him. All of it, he was used to it, and never pushed you to do things outside your comfort zone.
When you two were just friends, he really appreciated the moments of comforting silence you two would always share. He would be reading on his bed and you'd be doing your own thing on his table. Sometimes you'd catch him just taking those times alone together to stare at you. (Which he'd miserably fail to deny every time he was caught. With his hand covering his mouth, brows furrowed and clear blush on his face.)
And when the confession happened, you were surprisingly the one to tell him. You wanted to prove that Dan Heng was really the only man for your heart, the only one who got to see that smile you'd hide away from people, and the side of you that people rarely know exist.. the one you show to him. A side of you where you're free to laugh without the need to swiftly cover your mouth afterwards, the side of you that's able to talk for hours on end about the little things you're excited about.. Everything he sees of you, its for him alone. And he's happy to know that.
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SAMPO was like your voice in situations where you feel shy, it's almost scary how accurate he can read your feelings and convey them to other people.
"Oh don't worry! They're truly greatful, just a little shy." And you'd nod to confirm whatever he was saying.
But Sampo likes to play a little fun, enjoying how quick it was to fluster you. But if ever you asked him to stop, he would in that very moment. He likes to tease, but also knows how to stop.
Before you two dated, things really weren't all too different. Considering how close you two were, with him being your childhood best friend and knowing all about how shy you were.. he really didn't mind. You preferred to be a listener instead of a talker, and boy did he love to talk.
And now that you are now together, it seems not much had changed. He loved to talk, but now you loved to talk with him. You learnt how to open a little and crack out your shell, after the gentle encouragement and patience that Sampo had to help you open up. You owed it all to him.
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GEPARD and you were both equally shy, which made such a silly and adorable pair. The mere idea of you two holding hands together had him clearing his throat and you looking down in embarassment.
You were his second in command, many viewed you as a cold leader who rarely ever spoke unless it was needed.. when in reality, you were just really shy. But you're second in command for a reason, your leadership skills and how you'd treat everyone with kindness was something Gepard really admired about you.
But while you two were mutually pining for each other, you two were so painfully awkward that Serval was this close to announcing in her next concert that you two loved each other. She had to listen to Gepard talk for hours on end for the fact you held EYE CONTACT with him.
But those really were signs, Serval thought he was going delusional, but you were genuinely trying to hint you liked him like that. The way your eyes would stare a bit too long into his, how you spoke to him even when you didn't need to and lastly just.. the way you looked at him. You could look him straight in the eyes, when usually you'd turn away at the very second the contact was made.
And now that you two are together, it's like Gepard still hasn't accepted it. Because he acts like you're STILL just a crush. He's just so madly inlove with you that he still gets all flustered and nervous.
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You were shy, and your boyfriend was a ticking time bomb that attacked anything at any given moment. Most of the time, people would never really mind you, mostly because of how much of an oddball he was.
"Caelus, please stop scaring the hotel staff.. I really don't wanna speak to them and apologize on your behalf."
You watch Caelus sadly leave the closet, but if you asked him to do anything, he will do it in a heartbeat. "Me and my partner don't argue, they tell me to do something and I listen like a dog" Him, probably, but he knows he just doesn't wanna put you in situations where you're uncomfortable.
However his random obsession with trashcans has been getting concerning and you've started to wonder how the stars in the galaxy guided you to fall for him.
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theredpharaoah · 27 days
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Dare I say we give Giles too much. I think him not giving Buffy the Slayer Handbook was dumb and ignorant. The Handbook didn’t just have rules for the Slayer, it was the definitive guide to magic on Earth and its history. The fact they never pull it out again after the first episode irritates the hell out of me. How helpful would that have been for all the Scoobies - Willow could’ve picked up magic way quicker. It probably would’ve helped Buffy hone the psychic abilities she never really developed. Remember how she’s supposed to be able to sense vampires and stuff? And in the comics, Erin had access to all the Slayer memories(I’m pretty sure) because he inherited the psychic side of the lineage. Again, that could’ve been cool to see and very helpful.
I also feel - as stated many times before - Giles completely failed with Faith. People talk about how Buffy built up that rapport with Giles and her friends - that she made their relationship the way it was. But that’s irrelevant because the relationship was present and stable at the time of Faith’s arrival. We see when Kendra comes that even the Giles is a bit taken-aback to her very by-the-book approach to being a slayer. So when Faith came - who is extremely similar to Buffy - how did Giles not immediately feel that paternal instinct he has with Buffy, Willow, and Xander? That sort of instinct comes easier the more people you consider to be your “children”. I mean it’s crazy that The Mayor had to take Faith out of that nasty ass motel. A literal demon had to go “that’s no place for a young girl”. And sure he had a motive but the fact that none of the decent people had already said it? And the way they handled the accidental kill of the evil assistant to the mayor? First of all, the Slayer killing humans is frowned upon but it’s not a hard and fast rule. I’m not saying they should just go around killing ppl, but I’m not going to feel bad that Faith killed a man who was working for demons anyway. And compare that to how they reacted to Buffy Killing Ted(when they thought she had); completely different reaction. And Buffy had exhibited far more animosity towards Ted, than Faith had for some random who got in the way.
Giles as an adult - and something of an educator - should’ve immediately clocked that Faith did not have the same upbringing as the other 3, that the Scoobies were falling into their childish instincts and alienating her, and he should’ve gone out of his way to include her and impress upon the others why they needed to accept her. Especially after they found out about her Watcher’s death and saw how terrified she was of Kakistos. Why did Buffy and Angel have to be the ones to find out Faith needed to be fought for - that she needed help to deal with her trauma. I was really disappointed in Buffy as she’d lost her watcher and relocated just like Faith. She also understood how lonely and dangerous it is being a Slayer. But I can’t blame Buffy all that much cuz she’s a kid. And Giles willing all of his things to Faith in the comics and only the Slayer Handbook to Buffy did not move me. Giles considered Buffy to be the “One True Slayer” was not a gag. Everyone considers her to be that, giving her this handbook after she’s been a Slayer for damn near a decade is insulting. She don’t need that shit no more - she had to learn it all on the job. And giving Faith his money so she could retire from violence? Faith’s violence wasn’t the issue, her relationship to it was. The whole thing read as very melodramatic and self-absorbed.
Giles was very childish and we see it all throughout the series, but especially in the later seasons. I mean when you actually think about it, he’s so ridiculous. Buffy was 22 at the end of the series. 22 and she has to take care of a teen sister, pay mortgage, bills, etc. Could you imagine that amount of responsibility at that age? Our society still considers 22 year olds to be pseudo-teens for the most part. And he left cuz he “didn’t want her to become dependent on him”…what type of shit? She was already dependent on you - you’d been her Father Figure since she was 16 and throughout a boatload of trauma. You pretty much raised the girl. And you know that - that’s why you had a dream of taking child Buffy to the fair. He’s human, but that doesn’t excuse the level of cowardice he exhibited for me.
Also, I think instead of killing Jenny in Passions, they should’ve had her live. I think she would’ve been great as Faith’s mentor. And while she didn’t take the Scoobies to task for blaming her about Angel and alienating her, I definitely think she would’ve gotten them together for their treatment of Faith. I also think she would’ve pointed out Giles’ differential treatments of the two.
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generalsdiary · 1 month
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what if ratio breaks down and falls apart?
Dr. Ratio (x Aventurine at the end)
warnings: mental breakdown
word count: 1.9k
a/n: lots of ppl seemed to like this idea so here it is, not beta read, ffs come home aventurine
description: Dr. Ratio breaks down (angst), Aventurine mentioned/shows up at one point (fluff dare I say)
his hands shook immensely with the keys in his hand, the heavy doors open and close. he can feel it. he can no longer hold on. being a victim of routine, he manages to push on just a few moments longer, to put away his bag, lock the door, and take off his shoes. few steps through the hallway and it is over. his body trembling as his chest swells up with pain and sadness, so many emotions mixed up in one. filling up in his throat like a peach pit, choking him and making it harder to breathe. he falls to his knees, his breathing heavy, rapid, and irregular. in moments like these, he knows how to take care of himself, how to help himself, how to fix this. but it is too much. he can't. he also... why does everyone get to break down but not him? he can barely breathe in and breathe out, as many thoughts fill his mind.
eyes filling with hot tears except he cannot cry that much, he has always been incapable of actually crying and letting it all out.
like a water dam overflowing and drowning him along with it. the dam filling with water and using it in useful ways until the workers don’t show up, the tools get clogged, old, and broken. the dam overflows. nature always comes back to take its due, to pick up the price, especially human nature.
he isn't enough. he will never be enough. it is a fool's job, what he is trying to achieve. how could he ever spread knowledge everywhere, making it available to everyone? how is that being realistic? hopeful fool, he knows better than to hope. an idiot. a failure. why did he even think he could be capable of doing that? the aeons were right to not recognize him, he isn't worth their attention- he keeps failing. isn't it the definition of insanity to keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome? not enough. never enough. such expectations were put on him and he jumped to fulfill them- and when he didn't achieve the last one- to become a true genius, then he failed. failed the mold he was put in. failed the beliefs of everyone around him and their expectations. they were all wrong; everyone who said he could do something, become someone relevant, someone who matters and makes a significant change. and the things he did, well they were never perfect and always could have been done much better. for fuck's sake he fails his students, just how many get the actual knowledge, and how many give up? he isn't good enough, he should be better, and get the knowledge across in a way everyone would accept and know and learn. why is he not good enough? he keeps trying and it is never enough. not once has the universe said, ‘okay, you have done enough, you can rest now.’
why does he keep trying? and he is alone in all of it. who is there who cares for him- who puts his view of self aside, who can.. please.. who can please view him as a human.. a person.. just... as someone who doesn't need to be extraordinary- can he be loved in such a way, appreciated? who would care for him? when all that is said about him is that he is rude, when he only tells the truth and tries to help, he is told that he is insensitive, egotistical, and he is so far from it. why does everybody hate him? aeons, he hates himself. why was he born, created like this? it would've been so much easier to have been born an idiot, dumb, to work a normal job, and be happy.
he stares at an empty spot as these thoughts overtake him, and then he sobs as the next ones come... he wants to be held, oh so much. to be embraced, to be cared for, thought of in a positive way, for his name to be called with love. no one is enough, he isn't enough.
his thoughts keep spiraling in a whirlpool, almost like he is frozen in space. eyes fixed, hands shaking and the occasional warm tear falling down his cheeks, which are now red and hot.
his skin feels like it is burning, the clothes on him overwhelming him but he cannot move, it hurts, it all hurts. why does it hurt so much? this vicious cycle never ends. how could he stand up again when he is falling apart at the seams? is he worth it at all, the life he lives, if he cannot even help himself? he will never be enough. he wants to shout, to yell in frustration and anger- all swallowed in his throat while he continues to sit.. broken on the floor.
his thoughts become more incoherent, how could he.. why.. help.. not enough.. and so on. curses, hatred directed at himself, sorrow, and pity. his ears deaf at any sound, he is so lost in his mind, it is like he isn't even there.
this isn't the first time, but it was never this hard. he picked himself up before; standing, going automatically around his home to take care of his basic needs. but now he has no hope, no care for it, he cannot move. immobile and lost, so… so deep in this vortex.
the doors open and close. there's a voice, he doesn't even register it, “..tas?... home?”
the person makes a few more steps and sees Veritas, sitting on the ground. Veritas manages to register distant footsteps, rushed- it doesn't matter; he isn't even there. only his body is.
the person sits down in front of Veritas and hands him a glass of water. his eyes are unfocused, he appears still, hands on the floor with a slight tremor, cheeks shiny from the tears and a warm red color. instinctively he accepts the glass and drinks the water. the cool fluid makes him consciously blink and float back to the present moment. he registers the voice of the person in front of him.
“Veritas.. I'm here, good- the water is good for you- I'm here, alright?” his eyes focus on the blond man sitting in front of him. Aventurine's eyes are filled with worry and his hands cup Veritas' face, caressing slowly. his voice is calm, “you will be fine- I got you, okay?” Aventurine nods to himself more than to Ratio. his hand moves to the indigo hair, pulling his fingers through the soft locks in a comforting manner. Veritas' eyes are trained on him, full of pain and heartbreak, yet his face is neutral, so hurt.
“your head got to you again? I keep telling you- don't listen to it- it isn't right it only says mean things which aren't true. do you hear me?” the only thing he gets in response is a slow blink from the taller man. and it is enough.
“it tipped over, it isn't as bad as your head claims- don't listen to it, listen to me, focus on me. I’ve got you, I'm here-“ he pulls Veritas into his chest, cradling him in a way. “-and I'm not going anywhere”
fresh tears soak Aventurine's shirt. it hurts to be cared for, to be seen, and for that person to stay and not leave.. it feels undeserving and it just makes him cry harder. he sobs into Aventurine's shoulder, breaking down fully. his voice comes out high-pitched, breaking, “I... I.. it is so hard-” he sobs harder and tightly embraces Aventurine.
“I'm here, you will be okay, this will pass, I have you, don't- don't struggle against them, focus on me, please?” Aventurine pulls away to raise Veritas' chin and meet his eyes, those sunset eyes filled with tears. and he weakly nods.
“focus on me, my voice, Doc, focus on my voice. and I'm warm- you can feel it yes? my chest is warm and my hands- my scent- you can smell the perfume right? focus on me, ground with me. leave that dreadful place- it never did you any good.” he continues using safe words, repeating them, and when Veritas manages to get a grasp on reality once more; he feels empty, numb and Aventurine takes care of him. Aventurine helps him eat a proper meal, bathes with him where he holds him close against his chest, kissing his temple, and repeating that everything will be okay.
Aventurine holds him tightly in bed and whispers only the softest affirmations. before Veritas falls asleep, Aventurine mumbles kind words with his fingers in his hair.
he stays mostly awake that night, just in case Ratio wakes up in distress or from a nightmare. he doesn't mind it. he cares for him, if needed he'd pick his pieces up every day and help him put himself back together. Veritas is his, and he will always be there for him.
the morning turns out to be a slow one. Veritas would tiredly gaze at Aventurine, the blond man asleep into the late morning, and he wouldn't dare start his day- not yet, not now, not without him. Veritas' thoughts are slow this early in the day, they are quiet. he simply observes the younger man. finding some type of solace in it. he doesn't dare touch him as if the beautiful man was a statue made of glass and might break from a single touch.
when his eyes do open he hums and moves to press his face into Veritas' soft chest.
like it is the first time, Ratio is surprised, frozen for a few moments before he relaxes and embraces Aventurine.
“sleep well?”
he nods.
“I rescheduled my stuff, and I hope you will yours too-“, Veritas interrupts him, “..I did.” his voice quiet, monotone.
“today.. today will be easier, okay?” he raises his head, looking up. “I will be with you as long as you need and then some. please be kind to yourself. you need it” he whispers the last sentence and presses his lips into Ratio's cheek.
“I'll try... thank you.. for.. yesterday, dear gambler”
Aventurine nods, “I love you,” he says, easily, as if he didn't have to think those words through before he said them but it conveyed everything he wanted them to say. that he would be there for him, that he'd take care of him, that he would be his.
slight shock is obvious in Veritas’ eyes, that he would be loved gives him a stutter in his response. he feels so vulnerable, bare and naked in front of him. his emotions nude especially after being seen in the state he was in yesterday and despite that... or perhaps specifically because of it... Aventurine said that. with fear, felt on both sides, but also assurance that this is right, that it is a fact he softly says, “I... I love you too.”
beat. both staring into the other's eyes. Veritas cups his cheek. thumb drawing small circles, voice but a whisper, “please don't ever leave me” in that moment he is baren, vulnerable, his cards are on the table for the gambler to gamble off or hold tightly to his chest and fold.
Aventurine answers quickly with a small nervous smile, “the same goes for you too, Doc”
with all those emotions being so loud and scary, Veritas cannot keep up a coy act and even when he does Aventurine sees right through him.
“I promise” Veritas utters and seals it with a soft kiss.
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adelheidvonschicksal · 5 months
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Sorry its me again from the matter manipulation request I forgot to add their personality.Their personality is more like Quiet,calm I wouldn't call them a villian but they are also afraid of their own ability and they can't control lets say that they're a 2nd grade because they struggle with manipulating matter even tho it's like POWERFUL but they just struggle with it.
(Their power is like atom eve but they can control humans aswell since they can control atoms and molecules like changing ppl,their dna and stuff)
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Gojo
Back in high school, he’d find ways to annoy you the most, not because he didn’t like you but because for a long time he thought you were shy and needed to get out of your shell.
He also was curious about your powers: always asking if you could make something smaller or bigger for him, make regular tea into boba tea, if you could shrink all of them and possibly start a war with the giant ant hill in the courtyard. Mostly it was just to tease you and get you to talk to him even if it was you constantly denying his requests.
He finds your low confidence in your gift a huge waste of potential, and it’s a bit frustrating for him to watch. He thinks you should have more confidence in yourself.
Even still, he knows you well enough by now that he has all your little worries and habits pegged whether it’s itching, nail biting, tapping, he can see all your nervousness, and also make it disappear with a single inappropriate joke.
You’re a calm and quiet person, which he says makes it much more special when he’s finally able to crack a smile from you or get you worked up over some dumb scheme he’s concocted.
Well into young adulthood, he continues to bug you about doing silly little things with your powers for him. He doesn’t think you picked up on the fact that he asks for these little things to help you practice your skills and new abilities without you noticing.
Geto
Geto is really fond of you. He has been ever since you notice him making a disgusted scrunch after choking down curses on a mission, and how you used your powers to literally make them an easier pill to swallow by shrinking them.
He finds you to be a soothing presence like Shoko, another calm compared to Satoru’s storm with Geto himself somewhere in the middle. It makes a good dynamic.
He spends a lot of time trying to help you come to terms with your power. He always defends you when Satoru would use your fear of your power against you in petty fights.
Suguru is always trying to make sure you’re comfortable with everything going on around them. He tries to make sure you don’t get teased too much, and he always has a calm way of talking to you that convinces you to join in with the others more. You’re observant of everyone else so he wants to return the favor and look out for you too.
He swears you have nothing to worry about when it comes to using your powers. If things go wrong, he’ll help you figure it out. Although, he does enjoy how happy you get when you get something right, likes to pat your head.
After he defects from Jujutsu High, he gives you the offer to come with him. You wouldn’t have to feel pressured to use your powers anymore if you did. He wants all sorcerers to live a free life especially you. 
Nanami
Your personality makes you more favorable to him than other people. He knows your potential is strong and respects you for understanding, accepting, and trying to manage yourself to avoid hurting others. It’s the slow and steady method. However, this still causes him to underestimate you at times and overly worry about your mental wellbeing.
He does his best to protect you and give you direction, taking the lead even when your technique is realistically better for most situations.
You have to study a lot to learn all the different things you can do with your technique and so you both can bond over being readers and take each other’s suggestions on books or television programs.
However, there’s not really any other times where the two of you can be around each other a lot due to your grade difference and you’re both not the type to seek others out unless you need something so the relationship remains at a respectable level to friendship.
Megumi
The two of you get along fairly well since you’re both quiet people. However, that means that when you spend time together, there isn’t much talking as there is enjoying the company of someone else, which causes the two of you to get teased a bit as a quiet duo.
You’re both the second grades in your group, and you both got mental hangups about your powers. When Megumi notices this in you as well, he tries to help out, repeating what Gojo says about being greedier, but he gets a little embarrassed and says to ignore his rambling when you still seem confused by it.
He enjoys working with you, your powers open up endless possibilities to use in battle, and he wants to be able to think of more creative ways to use his powers in the way that you can so he finds your technique pretty/interesting to watch.
Megumi is a little more self-conscious around you. You’re very quiet and calm, maybe serious, he isn’t entirely sure because you don’t speak your mind a lot. He doesn’t judge you for it because he can be the same way.
He doesn’t feel the need to pressure you into speaking more than what’s comfortable. When you become better friends, he realizes he likes having your company without the pressure to entertain you.
He thinks you’re the best one in the school who can understand all of his worries. Itadori and Kugisaki understand him well, but he thinks maybe with you it’s more mutual), or at least he hopes he’s the same for you. 
Extra: You’d probably be able to learn from Yuki Tsukino as well. She doesn’t exactly have matter manipulation, but her mass manipulation technique could probably inspire some ideas. It would also lead you to being like teammates with the ever-boisterous Aoi Todo.
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pocketgalaxies · 7 months
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what did you mean about laudna and ashton driving you nuts?
mmmmm. dangerous territory! for me, i mean. to indulge the side of me that don't give a fu about–
it's pretty interesting how this ep turned out to be a direct comparison between laudna and ashton and how they discover and come to terms with the idea that there is an option for them to ostensibly destroy themselves in the name of protecting/helping/saving the rest of the party
a few ppl have already discussed this with far more thought and nuance than i'm willing to put into words right now but something something both of them taking this as an opportunity to Be Useful and Contribute to the cause, blind or perhaps willingly ignorant to the fact that these people love them for who they are and that they don't need to Do Something in order to be loved - in fact, losing them is actually a far less acceptable outcome to the party than whatever reward they perceive to be gained from their self-sacrifice. which is all very sad and tragic and juicy and pulls at the heartstrings which i always love. but this is kind of where the similarities end?
laudna follows this with a conversation in which she tells imogen what she would want to happen in rather explicit terms. and when imogen responds by saying she'll do everything in her power to stop it from getting to that point, laudna says "i can accept that." the next morning, they tell the whole group what happened. on the other hand, ashton pulls fearne aside and has their own grave conversation but in more vague terms, at least in the sense that i don't think fearne picked up what they were putting down or at the very least wasn't given the opportunity to really process and respond to what was asked. and then ashton isolated the two of them from the rest of the group to undergo this transformation without their knowledge. all of which drives me nuts! to see the direct comparison in which one is so much more communicative than the other
and i don't think it's fair to say that this is a consequence of the party being poor communicators overall. it's somewhat reminiscent of vax's initial response to scanlan leaving in c1 - we don't know your mother's name because you never talked about it. aka there's a difference between ashton bringing up this desire or plan to hold both shards and everyone brushing it off/not sufficiently exploring it vs. ashton choosing not to ask for their opinions, ideas, or feelings about it because he thinks they won't let him do it. he unilaterally made the decision for everyone, which is the most frustrating part for me. they presume to know what is best for everyone, and they presume to know that this is the only option, despite being surrounded by not only some of the most powerful people on the planet but also the people who care for them the most. which he said himself: nobody will miss me when i die, given that we all die - implicitly saying that if i am the only one who dies, i know you all will miss me. so to me it feels disrespectful to them, because even having acknowledged that they care, he doesn't trust that they might have ideas for a better solution or that they might recognize what this means to him and try to help him survive it. or that they might not want to be "saved" if it means losing him. or that they might like to say goodbye.
i know many people are saying that this is in line for ashton's character, frustrating or not, which i think is true. but it feels stagnant to me. ashton has come a long way in terms of learning to care for these people but they have learned little about being cared for. and while laudna is trying to believe what others say to her (that they love her, that she's important, that she deserves life) with varying degrees of success, to me ashton feels like they have made minimal progress and/or aren't trying to make progress. they refuse to see bells hells for what they so loudly and clearly are - people who love and care for each other, ashton included. and unfortunately, 77 episodes in and coming up on a vastly important mission (the first in a while), this brand of hypocrisy (taliesin's words not mine!) and lack of awareness for the group's feelings in the name of High Risk High Reward is something i have a rather low tolerance for ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
and for the record i've been thinking about this a loooot because i know most of it is colored by my general apathy toward this character. and i understand that a lot of people who love this character are so so fascinated by and invested in what happened. but my apathy toward ashton is something that i've tried to circumvent or logic my way out of a LOT in the past few years and at this point it's kind of an immovable object. and doing mental gymnastics to try and enjoy someone that i simply don't makes everything so much worse! so i don't mean to rain on anyone's parade but these are my thoughts whether i like it or not
tl;dr the end of this ep didn't make me excited, it just kinda made me feel annoyed and crazy. sorry
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Do you know that post from a queer person who grew up with queer parents and who said they can't really relate to many of the "typical queer experiences" because of it? Like the fear of coming out to your parents (even the idea of having to come out to them at all), growing up not knowing queerness is an option bc you never see queer people, feeling like there's something "wrong" with you?
I feel similarly about being aro. I never had to wonder whether what I was feeling was romantic attraction or not (bc I used to be alloro, so I could tell the difference when I became greyro and then aro), I never thought there was anything wrong with me for be(com)ing aro (bc I knew aromantics existed before I became aro), my personal "pan to aro pipeline" was literally just going from legitimately being panromantic to being aro, etc. I wasn't confused, I didn't think ppl were lying about experiencing romantic attraction (though I did think affective empathy was made up as a kid, but that's a different story), I only thought I might be a late bloomer bc I actually was, a little (not even significantly late, just a bit later than my classmates), etc.
I've seen people genuinely say self-loathing and thinking you're broken are "aro culture" (Youtube comment section my beloathed) and it makes me want to simultaneously shake some of my fellow aros and wrap them in a soft warm blanket bc that's bullshit and they deserve better, but they're also spreading the idea that it's normal and expected to have that kind of internalized arophobia and they gotta stop. It's not okay to define ourselves through suffering! It may be common, but it's not an inherent part of the aromantic experience! Yes, we need spaces to talk about the arophobia we face, including internalized arophobia, but we can do that without acting like it's inevitable, bc we deserve better than that!
I know I'm lucky, but dammit, lucky should be the norm! None of us should ever be made to feel broken for our orientation or identity, whether aro or otherwise queer. Isn't that the whole point? Isn't that what we fight for?
(This ask got away from me, sorry)
it would be nice if “lucky” was the norm, and we need to remember that all arospec experiences are valid, nice or not. I hope the rest of the community has been accepting of you (comment sections are never a nice place to go)
everyone is valid, no matter their experience!
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fizzy-tizzy · 2 months
Text
Headcanons for all the survivors gender/sexuality
Wilson- Just Kinda decided he was gonna be a boy when he was like 8 and his dad was so desperate for an heir that didn’t want him dead to rights he just kinda let it happen. would fuck anyone but at the same time is not interested at all
Willow- Butch-ish but more in a tomboy kinda way. genuinely likes wearing skirts and more feminine clothing but doesn’t really think she deserves to? if that makes sense? (She doesn’t really feel like a genuine legit girl) hardcore lesbian.
Wolfgang- Very traditionally masculine but in the “My job is to protect and take care of everyone” and not the “im a man so I can do whatever I want” type way. Gay but could totally be in a lavender relationship/marriage and have no problems w/ it
WX-78- Born a cis female, figured out early on that wasn’t right but couldn’t change it until they were an adult. Transed their gender but then figured out being a male wasn’t right either. eventually found someone who felt similarly and abandoned their flesh for the machine. solidly aroace. they’re triple a (agender, asexual, aromantic) just like batteries
Wickerbottom- cis female and “traditionally” feminine, has never felt the need to explore or question it. Used to be married to a man who was secretly gay and looking for someone similarly emotionally unavailable. He has since passed but left wicker a small fortune so. alls well that ends well ig
Wes- kind of a stereotypical femme twink. The kinda gay whos loud and proud and will hit you with a brick if you have a problem with that. feels obligated to help the others try and figure themselves out- esp the ones who are more in denial abt it
Maxwell- I think the idea that max is trans and Jack is cis and they turned out looking the exact same is hilarious. Technically the only ppl who knows he’s trans are jack and charlie- their parents just think he’s a masculine woman and everyone else knows him as a man. Bi and so so weak for bears and gently bossy women.
Wendy- Non-binary but still in the process of realizing it. Does not give a single shit abt romance but would totally be qpp with Webber once they know what that means.
Woodie- Probably Not Cis but has too much religious trauma to even dare questioning himself. He’s like JUST accepted the fact that he’s gay (still thinks hes going straight to hell but we’re working on that) so ynknow baby steps. baby steps. Deffo has a shit ton of body dysphoria due to the wereforms tho
Webber- Since spiders work a lil different in the constant (probably more like bees) there are like three genders Webber could potentially see themselves as. Drone, warrior, and queen. During his childhood he thinks of himself mostly as a drone but as he gets older and his sway over the spiders increases they’ll shift into seeing themselves as more of a queen. But other that he’s pretty much whatever non-spider gender is most convenient. Definitely bi.
Wigfrid- her gender is… strange. What she outwardly presents is her character’s way of presenting herself so ig I see her as kinda fluid? Idk valiant-valkyrie if ur reading this you can probably do a better job of explaining it. you are the defacto wigfrid authority. Definitely lesbian but once again will do whatever the role requires
Winona- Solidly butch lesbian. Definitely a caretaker and a protector but in the butch kinda way and not the femme kinda way. if that makes sense.
Wurt- Butch but hasn’t really realized it yet. does not think human genders apply to her bcs she’s a merm and will 100% be king when she grows up. baby lesbiab. her and wilba’s eventual union shall bring peace to the pig/merm kingdoms once and for all
Wortox- human genders do not apply to him. They are whatever is most convenient at the time. Fluid like loki and bugs bunny.
Walter- if xenogenders existed back then he would totally be like pupgender/buggender. Non-binary but has no problem being called a boy/man. Would be fine with any prns but people have only ever used he/him for him. Probably going to be a monsterf*cker when he grows up.
Wormwood- He is plant. Plants have sexes but no genders and wormwood is intersex anyway but they kinda just chose the first option presented to him once he found the others. Loves all but has absolutely no interest or idea about non-plant reproductive activities.
Walani- Yknow that “as a girl who’s a gross dude men who are fancy ladies are my best friends”? Yeah that’s her and Warly. she’s the emotional support golden retriever to warly’s high-strung cheetah. Lesbian but like. endearingly loser lesbian who’s only ever smooth when she’s not trying to be.
Warly- as mentioned before he is very much a guy who is a fancy lady. Would probably do drag if he had the chance and would 100% be the baddest bitch who makes all the men question their sexuality. Gay and european.
Wanda- doesn’t have time for all that gender questioning bullshit she just wants to kiss women.
Wheeler- Solid futch, leans more feminine or masculine depending on the situation. Woman-leaning bisexual, has probably fucked someone wife and inadvertently caused a divorce.
Woodlegs- pretty solidly cis male but 100% an embarrassing old gay grandpa. Doesn’t know much abt the terminology but is incredibly supportive and was definitely a homewrecker back in the day. Probably got out of at least one arrest by seducing the naval officer meant to bring him in
Wilba- high femme and definitely a baby lesbian. I do really like the idea of her being trans just because why not so why not. She and wurt are fat femme x fat butch once they grow up
Wagstaff- born as a girl but realized he hated it and made attempts to transition early on. Eventually ran away to America to fully transition. Non-binary too but hasn’t realized it yet and just thinks that everyone feels weird when someone calls them mr or sir. men-liker and old man yaoi certified
Wilbur- yes I’m doing the monkey. Gender is a strange concept to him, so he just kinda calls himself male bcs apparently he is? He doesn’t really understand it but it seems to be pretty important in human society so he’ll do it if it means he gets respected as an actual person and not just some sideshow.
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dearweirdme · 2 months
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I thank you for your detailed answer and I understand that things must not be easy for closeted ppl specially with their level of fame and I understand now the importance of choosing a bit more of artistic freedom and freedom in general but I still think that him agreeing to do this was one of the worse things he could have done for his career and i also feel now that him choosing to publicly do a lot of things that very much pointed at him and jk being together was really distasteful, I never would have thought this before but I just don't see the point of him wishing to make a point about his relationship with jk at all after doing what he did, I really wonder what was he thinking? Ppl won't take him seriously, won't take that relationship seriously at all, he's just harming his image bc he had that mediaplay above his head. There's just a lot of ppl thinking he's been gaybaiting all along instead of defending his gf, I guess this probably was important to him, sharing a bit about his real self while everyone was believing lies but it was such a bad choice now that I see it in retrospective. I didn't it take like that at all when all of this was happening I guess I just felt relieved that this hadn't changed and that he was still fighting but now it's like what are you even fighting? You did that and no one is going to seriously see anything statement in what you do with your bandmate, no one. And this will continue like that unless they ever come out which I doubt it will ever happen considering the choices they made. I remember even being somewhat upset back then for what I took as jk distancing himself from Tae publicly when I thought he needed the support the most but now I understand that he did it bc what is even the point in contradicting in any way a mediaplay he took part of and that has a purpose they must have agreed, was needed.
I really wish things would have been different and that Tae would have acted different, it's the way I'm 100% sure that tk are together and I have been for years and I still feel disappointed and I know is my fault for putting ppl I dont know personally into pedestals but it's just like I'm finding out that Tae is not as cool and brave as the person I had in my head and that also most ppl won't ever see him like that too and all the opposite bc of that mediaplay and the way he chose to act after it.
Seeing twt and TikTok and basically every platform after this is having a reminder that ppl really do see him as a coward, liar and a loser, even armys and idk when this will change, I don't think this at all bc i know it's not the truth and I used to get really defensive but now I have to accept that this are consequences of the choices he made, this and ppl never taking queerness related to him as anything but a joke or queerbaiting or fans deliriums
Hi anon!
responding to this ask:
Sorry for being late to respond to this, I've been sick these last couple of days (still feel awfull and pretty ligthheaded honestly, so If I seem weirder than usual... that's probably why.. also, I'm probably making more spellingmistakes than usual😶). I have had plenty of time to think about this though, because both this ask and your former one made me actually really sad... and I did want to think through why you felt like this, and why my feelings are so opposite. So here I go, and I don't mean to be harsh or insult, but at the same time.. this is how I feel.
We all have our own ideas about who we think an artist is. I think it is very clear that amongst fandom, there are many differetn thoughts going around about who Tae and Jk are as persons... what they are like on the inside. When we form an idea about who we think someone is, we also start getting expectations... and I think that is why it's almost unavoidable that at one point we get a bit dissapointed. It can be small disappointements (like, not liking an add, or a song, or that they smoke) but it can also be big dissapointments... like the one you are feeling right now. I think this also ties in with how so many were feeling negatively towards Jk when he didn't act how many wanted him to during Tae's Layover. Expectations were set (because of them being Tkk, but also because of how many perceived his actions during Jm's Face), and he failed misserably in many eyes.... but I digress.
We don't really know them well enough to be able to have that kind of expectations though.... especcially when it comes to their private lives (and when we talk about their closet, or their relationship... that is what those are). As Tkkrs we feel very connected to Tae and Jk. So much so, that at times we feel as though we are fighting alongside them. We make their battle ours. But ultimately it isn't. We can support them, and we definitely should.... but we should at the same time be aware that it is THEIR lives. Only they know the inns and outs of their lives, only they know what's at stake for real.. so they are the only ones who get to decide. So I understand that you might feel dissapointed because you feel you've been fighting for them so hard and now one of them made a choice that to you doesn't fit with what you think you've been fighting for... but at the same time I think you are wrong, because.. we don't know what it is that they are fighting for, and we don't know the exact inns and outs of their lives.
Personally, I've never fully felt as though they are fighting hard to be able to come out or to show us that they are romantically together. I just think that's not even an option for them at this point, both from a business perspective and a private perspective. There's a few instances where I feel Tae went a bit further (the insta pic before Paris, him posting only Jk and Bam before enlisting, the matching T-shirts). To me most of the other stuff is just them living their lives adn things we pick up on because we pay attention. So your and my starting point is different, I don't see them/Tae a someone who has been "wishing to make a point about his relationship with Jk". I think he has wanted to.. very much so, but don't think it is realistic to think that he wanted to out them. Your sentence "Ppl won't take him seriously, won't take that relationship seriously at all"... that's kinda what this is all about right, we're not supposed to take it seriously in a way. Because if everyone would take them seriously, they would be out.
Being in a shipping fandom will forever be weird. Would I reccommend it to anyone.. well, no 😂. It comes with a lot of highs but also with a lot of lows and I consider it to be a neverending rollercoaster of emotions in which you will actaully get bitchslapped from time to time. We will forever be fandom's punching bag. Are we to blame Tae and Jk for that? I personally don't.. and I've though about this hard the last few days. But my answer has continously been that: no, they didn't choose this. It's society that's wrong. That does not mean that I think they can never do anything wrong, there's things that would go too far for me as well. But imo that's not the case here. He did one walk, we don't know what he expected the fan response to be. Maybe he was expecting us all to brush past it with force like we do so many times. Maybe he thought it would have past already with that bua (which is what often happens). You are making a lot (!) of assumptions on his thought process and motives, when in reality we know nothing about it.
We know nothing about the actual hardships they have gone through. When I try to imagine what feelings they must've had throughout all these years of hiding is bad though. It's not just a case of not holding hands whne the camera's are off. It comes with being shamed, with feeling afraid, with feeling alone, with feeling wrong, with feeling you should let the other go because your just an obstacle to them, with feeling like maybe you should just leave, with feeling like you are letting everyone down... and that's just what I can imagine. We don't know the specific memories that haunt them. We know Tae has had mental health problems. To me it is not unimaginable that being closeted had a big part in that. I also think he always put the band before his own needs (wanting to resign for the members). I think the situation has been much more dire than any of us can guess. So when Tae chose an option (and we don't even know which other options there were) to maybe get some more freedom in at least one part of his life, I just think of him and his situation with a lot of empathy.
I suppose all the Taennie insanity from last week has bothered you. And maybe it made you feel as though we will never get rid of them. While I do think Taennie will have a bit of a long term effect, it's more in the sense of every now and then there will be an article refering to a rumored relationship. Taennies themselves will disapear sooner or later (as soon as Jennie is spotted with someone else basically). They are desparate, their ship meant nothing and is basically an empty vessel. Their is no real depth to it. I was kinda joking a while ago by saying I'll get a Jkk like essay in my inbox soon... but honeslty, Taennies aren't even able to leave an in depth essay.. because they have only bits of similar jewelry and edited pictures.
I have often said that Tae and Jk's relationship with Tkkr-fandom must be a complex one. It's a very onesided one, and I think we have to make amends with the fact that it's always going to be a one-sided one. That doesn't mean they don't appreciate us, but it does mean that they will probably never act out their appreciation.
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kingsandbastardz · 8 months
Text
I've reached episode 38 of MLC.
Cheng Yi's acting in the dungeon was impressive and the sequence it took for Li Lianhua to rescue Di Feisheng was super satisfying. So many micro expressions and subtle hints of his growing worry while he kept a rapid patter up to get information! While being starved/ denied water! LLH is great at multitasking!
Honestly, it was this episode that finally made me decide to watch the other dramas under this tragedy king's filmography. If I can battle my second-hand embarrassment to watch Ryan Cheng act out the role of a husky for longer than 5 seconds, surely I can watch Cheng Yi spit blood and die in misery 10x in a row.
Anyway thoughts:
While I enjoyed what I watched, instead of all this taking place in the palace, I wish the entirety was a rescue arc for DFS with the queen bug ending up in Shan Gudao's hands through other means, or uncontested and in his lair. Or maybe Jiao Liqiao had it all along! If only so we get more of the trio learning about each other and group stuff going on. They're the best when all 3 are together so DFS spending half the series away kinda puts a damper on that. And the emperor's arc seemed like a cop out. I'm aware of the ending before I even started watching so imo if they wanted a tragic ending, they absolutely could have nailed that home in several other ways. The tendon healing feels rushed bc they had less time to work with.
Fang Duobing what the hell kind of name for newly invented martial arts is that? You live and breathe heroic jianghu stories and you decide to go with a DFS style "sword", I mean, Mr Worrier's Swordplay? He do be worrying, though, so he's at least upfront about it.
If DFS and LLH ever decide to bump uglies, they would totally get distracted halfway through and go off to solve a mystery or something, wouldn't they? 💀 like DFS just randomly looks at the wall and being like ???? Why is it suddenly a different material and pattern? I need to see why it's so ugly. Also the fact that it's DFS doing this and not LLH. Xiao Shunyao says his intelligence is highly specialized to martial arts - but the guy is a natural investigator. He's just very tactile about it and prone to ripping things out of the wall or ground while checking it out. His instincts are spot on, though
I like how confused DFS was when LLH was like, "Come on JL totally told you the thing." DFS's expression screamed, "Why would I know? Did you not notice I've been doing my best to ignore her??"
I would have liked to see Wuyan deliver the salt to LLH just to see what else he does or doesn't tell him - I would also like to know when he received instructions to deliver the salt to LLH. Was it before or after DFS got paraded around and locked in the master bedroom?
DFS using grey wall or grey rock tactics to deal with JL. Ppl forced to live with narcissists/abusers do this. His version is more like what prisoners do when they have to face torture but that usually is refusal to speak. What he's doing is not just silence, but also refusing to look at her and trying to minimize any reaction to her play, which is an attempt to deny her anything she can feed on. I'm guessing he's had to do this growing up too.
Speaking of that - what exactly was Di Fortress doing with their method of training kids into killers? I somehow missed or forgot that part and can't tell if they ever addressed that. Did they rent them out as assassins? Is it a weird death cult that worships battle and uses that energy as human sacrifice to their war god? OHOHOH you know what they could have done instead of the Enperor arc? If they'd freed up the episodes and put the Nanyin bugs into a Di Fortress arc instead. Since they were already using some sort of bug mind control technique anyway.
Fang Duobing, what do you mean you always knew DFS was on your side? All you do is yell at him for being a villian! 😂 also what's with everyone just accepting that DFS was going to stand there and join them without even a bit of protest or trying to arrest him or anything?
It's interesting, the parallels between LLH and DFS's situation. They're both regular dudes trapped under some mythic narrative where everyone thinks they're these story archetypes. But they're not, they're just two martial arts nerds trying to live their life (one to do good, one trying to survive) . They both had someone they trusted not only betray them- but demand they get on their knees and become publically subservient to them. DFS's situation would have evoked sympathy by itself but LLH probably felt extra understanding about how he must feel. Especially bc he knows what his own reaction would have been in the past to that kind of humiliation. Like, aside from JL's implied intention of sex slavery, how is SGD's plan for LLH any different than what JL did to DFS when she dragged him back home?
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bestworstcase · 7 months
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actually ppl don’t want an Ozlem reunion since some ppl think one or the other is abusive towards the other and they would see it as abuse apologism. Yes I seen ppl say that, I even did at some point lol. I think ppl need to stop seeing everyone as abuser and victim bc that is not how the world or stories works. You can be both or be a victim that hurts others.
i mean i would actually characterize the ozlem kingdom era marriage as abusive; like, i’m not sure how else to accurately describe a situation where one spouse is engaging in such extreme deception over such a long period of time for the purpose of religious conversion. but abuse is just an action—or more specifically a pattern of actions over time—and where change and reconciliation are concerned (esp in the context of a fictional relationship in a fairytale story) intention matters a lot.
ozma didn’t lie to her or manipulate her because he saw her as a means to an end (<- which is 100% what salem believes now) he did it because a Literal God told him the world was condemned and she was beyond saving, and oz was terrified and desperate for that to not be true. salem meanwhile has been the tortured scapegoat of this same god for millions of years and she knows exactly how cruel, petty, and manipulative he is; once she understands why ozma did what he did she has every reason to let go of her anger and accept that he’s as much a victim of the brothers as she is, in different but intertwining ways. and ozma once released from his curse has every reason to never lie to anyone like that again, especially not to her.
so this is a narrative that is set up to be resolved through reconciliation and healing together; both of them Want That—or at the very least salem clearly wants some closure only he can give her—and ultimately what tore them apart and turned them against each other was the manipulation and cruelty of the gods. part of overcoming that is closing the rift torn between them.
i think people are as a general rule deeply hostile to narratives about cycles of abuse resolving through peaceful reconciliation because in real life, (serial) abusers often don’t change. but that’s also not a very constructive stance to be absolutist about because there are also, in real life, an abundance of people who are abusive at some point in their life and then do change, because they learned better or matured or healed from whatever trauma or health problem provoked the abusive behavior (<- e.g. sudden out-of-nowhere cruelty is a red flag for brain tumors) or got out of their own abusive situation and stopped shoveling their own pain downstream. like. treating ‘abusive’ as a lifelong brand that someone can never ever possibly stop being is not. helpful, actually. people can and do change and abuse happens for myriad complex reasons, it is not in any sense a simple problem.
but yknow. nothing fandom loves more than a thought-terminating buzzword to be reductively black-and-white about because gods forbid a story have nuance.
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mbti-notes · 5 months
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Anon wrote: Hi, I’m INFJ. I need to ask: 1) what I should improve myself to feel less put off at Ts in general, to lessen the T & F difference 2) Tips on communication w Ts, especially INTJ.
Ik you said ppl’s strength underlie their weakness & vice versa, so they have a set of advantages to offer. As much as I’d like to dismiss it, I suck at Ti (I’m improving by learning critical thinking). I need to view Ts less judgmentally.
I had personal motivations for handling immaturity, but that wasn’t the only drive. The other (great) one is my feelings for my childhood INTJ friend, who I’m having a crush on & is asking me out. I’ve had feelings for him since childhood.
I used to think we couldn’t go out because of my immaturity. I suck at handling personality setbacks/criticisms/etc. (all date back to bad Fe & Ti lol). Later, I became more honest w my feelings, better at expressing genuinely, finally more logical than before (some positive changes for my own sake). But I still feel unable to bridge the gap w the Ts (esp TJs).
I hate this state, it robs me off chance for a greater relationship w the guy I’ve loved for years. I’m better than before, but I still fear this won't work. Our friendship is great, time passed but we still share many central values like how close we are to our family, definition of independence, pet peeves, political spectrum. I used to suck at not making a disagreement a heated argument, but with time, I got better at It. We had found the way to disagree while still being able to fully understand the others’ POV. I got more grounded thanks to him, too. But our growth was platonic.
Communication challenges are still considerable. I never used to tell him my feelings and I’ve never been in relationships before. But he’s already been in a few. I’m into this possible change as much as I’m willing to stay the same, because I’m so scared whether being his girlfriend will actually be a good choice. Help :(
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You say you get the idea of everyone having strengths/weaknesses but it doesn't sound like you really do. On the surface, it's not a bad thing to want to improve upon your weaknesses, but your approach to it is problematic. You still haven't understood that the first step must be to accept and embrace weaknesses, because proper self-improvement has to come from a place of love - not hate.
You are standing in front of someone who knows your strengths and weaknesses and still loves you and wants to start a life together. Yet you cannot accept being loved by him. Why? Because you haven't yet learned to love yourself, so you can't imagine that others can, either.
It sounds to me like it is lovingkindness you need to work on. Critical thinking isn't going to help you accept and embrace all of yourself, is it? When you finally learn how to approach yourself, your life, and others with an attitude of love, the relationship problems you've described have no reason to arise.
For example: If you can accept your insecurities, own them and talk about them openly and still love yourself, who can trigger them? If you can accept and love him both for his strengths and weaknesses, why would they cause you any conflict? And when conflicts arise as they inevitably do in intimate relationships, if you approach them with a reconciliatory attitude, why wouldn't they get resolved?
At the heart of your question is not personality but your self-worth and self-esteem. Until you address those issues, your attempts at function development are at high risk of getting twisted up. Ni+Fe should allow you to envision beautiful potential for love, but you are using them to invent more ways to hate and punish yourself.
Relationships aren't about being perfect and being able to handle everything perfectly. If that's what you're unconsciously aiming for, then you're imposing a very unreasonable burden on yourself. Failing to achieve false images of perfection only exacerbates self-hatred in a vicious cycle.
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eobard-thawne · 11 months
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who did/would you choose as divine?
there is still time for me to decide on the new divine but i want to know what the tumblr fandom thinks. i recorded my inquisitor's interactions with all three candidates on the matter so that i wouldn't forget who thinks what skdjasks please feel free to reply under this or message me etc. i am actually obsessed with this game and want to interact more ppl from the fandom :3
Cassandra The Chantry should provide faith. Hope. Instead, it cannot veer from its course, even in the face of certain death. It needs to change. Perhaps I must be the one to change it. The circle of Magi has its place, but it needs reform. Let the mages govern themselves, with our help. Let the templars stand not as the jailors of mages, but as protectors of the innocent. We must be vigilant, but we must also be compassionate to all peoples of Thedas, human or no. That is what I would change.
Leliana I was pondering who might be Divine and it suddenly occured to me: is it so ridiculous for the grand clerics to support me? Why shouldn't they? Change things. Change everything. No more Circles, the mages would be free. The Chantry would accept them as Maker's children. In fact, it will accept everyone: elves, drawves, even Qunari. Why exclude them? The Chantry allowes our differences to tear us apart instead of teaching us how we are the same.
Vivienne To sit on the Sunburst Throne, a candidate should have grace, charm, and a will of solid steel. The most important thing, of course, is the restoration of the Circles and the Templar Order. The institutions that have protected Thedas for ages must be rebuilt and the malcontents utterly crushed. We cannot allow anarchists to threaten the lives of the innocent. After we restored sanity to the world, there will be time to address voices of dissent.
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kaleidoscopic-quiddity · 10 months
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'todoroki doesnt even want to be a hero, thats just something endeavor forced him into/pushed onto him'
did??? we all??? watch??? the same show????
todoroki openly antagonises Endeavor, to his face, numerous times 
even as a literal toddler he would stand up to endeavor, yelling at him to not hurt rei, and after rei pours the hot water on his face, todoroki told endeavor ‘it’s your fault she hurt me’ 
he slaps his hand away after the provisional licence remedial training, and in the endeavor agency arc he tells him to ‘stop acting like my dad in front of my friends’ 
just in general his manner of speaking to Endeavor is very disrespectful and outwardly aggressive in japanese
basically, hes not afraid of pissng off his dad, at all, even in public
so if todoroki truly didnt want to be a hero, what gives you the impression that he wouldnt just straight up refuse to go to UA, or at least do everything within his power to fail his classes/get expelled??
the whole point of his fight with midoriya at the sports festival is todoroki accepting himself and that his power is his own, not endeavor's, and that its okay for him to become a hero using it
literally what does todoroki say after midoriya yells 'its your power isnt it?!' at him? in that moment where himself admits that he forgot all about endeavor and wasnt thinking about him at all??? he says 'I want to be a hero too'
look i get why this take is popular, lots of people can relate to todoroki in that they have shitty/abusive parents who forced them into a career path or life style they dont wanna do
and so obviously they project those feelings of discontent and resentment back onto todoroki
but in the literal canonical text of bnha, his character aspires to be a great hero just like midoriya and bakugou
if heroics truly was 100% something that endeavor just forced onto him, why did todoroki go to help midoriya and iida in hosu? why did he follow midoriya and bakugou at jaku? why did, along with kirishima, he approach yaoyorozu to get a nomu tracker off of her after bakugou was kidnapped and say that he was going to make a rescue attempt whether or not midoriya or anyone else joined him? why did he run in to try to save all might from the nomu at USJ?
like???? i dont have anything against people having differing interepretations of a character or headcanons from me, ofc different ppl will read the same thing differently
but this is a take that is just so extremely the opposite of todoroki's canonical characterisation it baffles me that its so common??
did we all miss the part where he was deeply frustrated with himself for failing he provisional liscence exam? or where he decided that he needed to be the one to stop dabi?? the fact that he carries first aid supplies in his hero costume so he can better help people?? or how he suggested a concert for the school festival because he thought itd be a good idea to do something 'fun' and 'stress relieving' for the other students at UA???
idk, ofc at the end of the day ppl can headcanon what they like and everyones interpretations are valid and none of this actually causes any harm to anybody etcetera etcetera, art is subjective and all that
(like this is benign fandom bullshit for a mediorce shounen battle series, im self aware that none of this actually matters)
but idk im just still confused as to how ppl seem to miss the point so fuckin badly with todoroki's character
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OH and also I've seen people defend with their whole chests the choking scene, like really is this the hill you wanna die on?😭 and its like it would be soo nice if we could accept that andrew minyard has his wrongs and his rights, like some of the aftg characters are so interesting there's so much to them and the topics the books deal with are all topics ppl would feel strongly about, it would make sense that some people get rubbed the wrong way or dislike even andrew and neil (im mentioning them bc the double standards are crazyy😭) like they've got their good qualities and bad qualities like anyother character, I've seen good meta from people who don't like one of them or talking about their "bad points"
I guess I've just come to complain in your inbox, but the fandom is kind of interesting to me I think it would be a lot more split if less people had the tendency to defang andreil like they do, it's like how a lot of readers hate the idea of andreil never getting married or never saying I love you, or how they depict andrew as smooth or unable to make mistakes somstimes😭like yes not getting married/saying ily could be a bit weird to some people (not to me though I understand🫡) or your favourite character may be unlikeable or make mistakes or do a bad thing but it makes them less flat and it could make sense for the character soo
I really did come to complain in your inbox, I wish I could just stay delusional in an echo chamber with all my favourite blogs but alas😓I have to see opinions that I think are wrong, it's funny how we can read the same books and take completely different things from it so I just wanted to talk to someone
um first of all don't apologize I like mail of all kind so you're good you're so good
also yeah. pretty much. the double standards for Neil and Andrew vs. literally everyone else is brain rotting sometimes. honestly sometimes I have to actively remind myself that I like those two and that they're actually great characters just because the takes their fans have almost push me almost to the other side. and it usually seems to be that people will acknowledge like little, surface level flaws in them just to be like "y'all need to realize these characters are NUANCED and have FLAWS" so that they can then proceed to ignore the bigger issues.
I think part of it is that, esp with Andrew, he can also get a good bit of hate so people try so hard to stay away from that that they end up on the other side of him.
but tbh I just try to not pay much attention to what most other people say tbh it just feels more relaxing that way. whenever I venture too far into the sea of aftg fan content I usually reach a point where I just feel weird.
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