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#because without him. what would they know about friends. or the universe beyond their ship.

kindagayfish · 1 year

Note

Hello friend!

Im new to the trigun family after watching Stampede and recently ive been on a Knives kick and i dont see much content about him x reader.

So i was wondering if we could get some headcanons about what would make Knives feel “those gross human feelings” (love, the need to protect,need for affection) for the reader, and how he would tell them or show them?

I just need some knives fluff! Boy needs and hug! If you dont wanna write that, thats totally fine!! Thank you!!

A/N: Knives is SUCH an interesting character and im literally so feral for him. This is very much stream-of-conscious writing and not proofread. It also turned out so much longer than I expected! I legit got so carried away so I hope you enjoy it!!

Also I feel like my thoughts/headcanons for Knives will always be constantly evolving because he's just such a complex character??? And I love it???

Contains: Hints of nsfw thoughts if you squint??, fluff I guess??, can knives even do fluff???, the slowest of slowburns for this man

So we know Knives does know what love feels like…sorta. He loves Vash, and wants to see a future where they can both live their lives without the fear of being used for what they are. However, that means killing every human left on the planet. So it’s a twisted kind of love…but he still cares in his own way.

I don’t think Knives would notice you right away. It won’t be some love-at-first-sight, omg this human was so nice to me thing. It will take A LOT of time. He has completely blocked himself off from anyone because of fear, and fear is an intense driving force.

Perhaps you’re involved in his grand scheme somehow; A scientist in a lab who has taken a special interest in the Plants. At first, you’re focused on finding a more sustainable way for them to be used…but then after witnessing one open itself up, showing a high level of intelligence, you change your studies to find a way for them to live beyond the confines of the glass tanks.

You’re aware of Knives. Aware that he’s what they call an Independent. And you take notes on him, studying any file that isn’t restricted from the ships that once roamed the universe.

Knives becomes aware of you rather quickly. It's hard to ignore the way your eyes follow his every move, jotting down your observations quickly into a notebook that never seems to leave your hands. At first he finds it irritating, having this human stalk him like a shadow. However, it was only when you caught him on a particularly bad day that he finally spoke to you.

"Get OUT." His voice was ice, sending a sharp tendral into your notebook, tearing it from your hands. You let out a pained yelp, though none of the blades touched had you, and ran out of the room.

After he's calmed down, curiosity gets the better of him, and Knives spends the rest of the evening reading through your notes.

The next day it's him that seeks you out. Knives finds you in a lab, placing your in-tact notebook on the table in front of you before stating that some of your observations were incorrect, which causes you to flush with embarrassment. He leaves immediately after, and upon inspecting your notebook, you find that he had crossed out some of your own notes, replacing it with the "correct" information.

Knives begins to tolerate your company. You're not as insufferable as the other humans, and he finds himself quite intrigued by how brave you've gotten around him ever since that day. But he continues to keep himself at a distance….for now.

So anyways as your "relationship" with Knives progresses:

Knives shows his love through acts of service and quality time. He allows you into his space; allows himself to lower his guard and try to understand these strange feelings he gets when around you. Although, again, this takes time.

He'll start to show interest in whatever experiments you're running, quietly observing from a respectable distance. It might even start to feel like you’re the one being studied from how intense his silent stare is (he is 100% memorizing everything about you).

The more time spent with you, the more possessive he becomes of this time...and just you in general.

Knives knows that you have to talk to others in order to do your job, but that doesn't mean he won't glare at them until they walk away. He prides himself on how his presence alone can clear a room so it can just be the two of you.

If you forget to eat, time getting away from you, Knives might sigh and fetch you something. Setting it down directly in front of you and making comments under his breath about how "humans are pathetic" and how you "can't even take care of yourself". You're like a pet, he tells himself...rationalizing why he would go out of his way to make sure you stay healthy.

Physical touch comes much later

Sometimes you'll feel him lean in from behind, gazing over your shoulder to gain a better view of what you're working on. Heat radiates off of his body, but he never brings himself to touch you. Knives finds it amusing at how flustered you get when he does this and likes to test your boundaries as well as his own. He’ll catch himself too often wondering how soft your skin would feel under his fingertips. It’s a disgusting thought, really. (he is so touch starved but will NOT allow himself to indulge in this innocent fantasy because he’s stubborn and has the biggest god complex)

But it eventually happens one evening when you hand him your notebook. All of his senses are ignited, the place where your fingers brushed against his hand burns throughout the night. Knives can't bring himself to admit he likes this feeling, at least not out loud.

Oh but does he crave it.

It's a thrill, an adrenaline rush, and strangely even more fulfilling than the feeling he gets when he takes a human life.

Starts as "accidental". Fingers colliding when reaching for the same thing, the back of his hand brushing against yours as you both walk, standing too close to you so that when you take a step back, you bump into his chest.

Soon he's grabbing your wrist to stop you from doing something stupid, placing a hand on the small of your back to guide you out of a room, even taking your hand in his, frowning at the fresh injury on your skin, but also burning up inside at the fact that his own hand swallows yours completely. That you're just so fragile. So human.

Knives is absolutely obsessed.

#millions knives x reader #knives millions #millions knives #millions knives headcanons #trigun stampede #trigun x reader #millions knives x you

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charlieconwayy · 9 months

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Just curious what you don't like about Cory/Topanga if you feel like talking about it!

hey, i don't mind!

first off i think boy meets world in the context of just a purely heterosexual show makes it age pretty poorly, and that all stems from cory and topanga. i know one of the writers said a while back that the writers room was torn between shory and corpanga, and tbh, rewatching as an adult, that's extremely evident. i'm not gonna make this post all about shory bc that's reductive but i am first and formost a shory girl and a firm believer that cory matthews is a gay man

so let's get into it.

i really really love s1/2 corpanga. idk if it's just bc ben/danielle felt more natural back then or if it's bc they actually allowed cory to be wrong and topanga to be right, but it's just so sweet. one of my all time fav ship moments from the show is the frickin sock basketball scene where they touch hands and he giggles. so adorable! but i think what really makes them suffer after s1 (and kind of s2) is just that they clearly made topanga a normal, kelly kapowski girl-next-door type to make her more "desirable" for the male audience. that could be an entire separate post, but it's so fucking obvious that that's what the change was and it sucks because topanga was great the way she was.

they're not like hatable in season 3 exactly, but the "old married couple haha look how old gross and boring they are" trope when they were legitimately sophomores was just weird? and this is a retrospect thing but i hate how the show just kept retconning shit and pretended they never broke up in season 3, as if a HUGE storyline and one of the most iconic episodes (the happiest place on earth) wasn't about them getting back together? and for me just the concept of the ~universe wanting them to be together~ over and over again is just so fucking lame when they were so toxic. (great video on this here)

they really don't do anything wrong in season 4 either, but a long walk to pittsburgh is honestly so beyond ridiculous LMAO. i know everyone talks about how romantic it is, but i hate it because topanga literally runs away and moves back to philly just for cory. i know they claim it's to finish at john adams too, but i would find that much more believable if they had developed topanga AT ALL outside of cory. we know almost nothing about her home life and they wrote trini out so we never even see any friends of hers! the trend of them fighting and talking down to amy about their love is so fucking stupid too. like you are sixteen. it is fine to love someone and want to be with someone, but amy is right that it's not healthy for them to be as obsessed with each other as they are. like cory literally doesn't know who he is outside of topanga and that's NOT healthy.

oh lordy. s5. i'm not going to get into how much i hate that shawngela (a MUCH happier, more interesting relationship) was reduced to "wanting to be corpanga" in both their intro episode and then fucking gmw, but even the "old married couple" stuff in "chasing angela" at the restaurant is so annoying. "last tango in philly" is one of my fav episodes, but it's the perfect example of how cory can never accept he's wrong. shawn tries to tell him they should stop, and he just tells shawn he knows nothing about relationships and keeps being a dick about topanga and her (obviously gay) friend. but obviously, you're here to hear about how i feel about the cheating. yes, cory cheated and he genuinely liked lauren. for the show to act like he didn't is just gaslighting their audience. and tbh? i think ben and linda cardellini had excellent chemistry (certainly more than he and danielle did at that point . . .) and i think it's completely healthy to date more than one person! it was nice seeing cory be able to open up and bond with someone else, and yes, what he did was cheating. just bc he changed his mind and decided he "couldn't live without topanga" (bless u probably queer writer for what u did w that line :') ) doesn't mean that it didn't happen. topanga had EVERY right to break up with him. it does piss me off that we barely saw topanga's reaction to the breakup when there was a whole ep dedicated to shawn's reaction (and i say that as the #1 shawn stan), but that show hated women lbfr. AND WHY TF WAS IT BAD FOR HER TO KISS JONATHAN JACKSON WHEN SHE AND CORY WERE BROKEN UP????? bc cory can't accept things not going his way and not having control. the "we are a masterpiece" scene makes me so fucking angry omg i cannot

and i mean, bro, the yale shit has been talked about to death, but topanga lawrence going to the same college as straight d-student shawn hunter has got to be the dumbest, most woman-hating shit the show ever did. love can survive long distance if you put the effort in, trust me. (yes i am aware that the show prob didn't want to separate their main couple, but s6 was almost entirely about shawn anyway so????)

then in seasons 6 and 7 we get into the "cory yelling at and publicly humiliating topanga" trend. "undapants" is iconic so i'm not gonna go into that episode (fuck you "take her back to your tornado infested trailer park" line!), but i can name at least seven occasions where cory pressures her into sex. and rider strong is right. it was extremely holier than thou how they constantly made it seemed like corpanga was better than shawngela for not fucking before marriage. like isn't there a line where they call shawngela sluts in s7? the whole honesty bit in "the truth about honesty" (admittedly one of my fav eps) is also just ridiculous bc both of them always get pissed off at the other one for being honest, even in the past. i've seen people get mad at topanga for throwing yale in cory's face but lbr, who didn't see that coming? i guess maybe it's a little weird bc she'd never been resentful about it before, but that's a HUGE thing in their relationship. and yes, it is weird that she's using his razor without his permission but again just the pressuring her to show him her ass is also fucking weird (it's also weird imo that they've been together "their whole lives" but they've only ever kissed, but again, holier than thou bullshit)

one thing i can say about how weak and uninteresting their relationship actually is is that their ENTIRE wedding episode is about shory, bc they are the much more compelling dynamic in cory's life. weirdly enough, i do actually really like cory's vows though?? on a shawn hunter stan note, oblig "that best man speech was bullshit" comment. it's completely normal and healthy to have a best friend outside of your partner? especially when you can't be honest with your partner. god i fucking hate that bullshit. just like how i hate in "seven the hard way/the war" how they portray cory abandoning his best friend/true life partner for topanga AND THEN IN FUCKING GMW THE BAD FUTURE FOR EVERYONE LITERALLY CAME TRUE!!!!!!! omg i will go insane if i think about that for longer than a few seconds.

end of post, but leaving this here

#boy meets world #anti corpanga

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justanancientfangirl · 7 months

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A bit of a rant: on Sylvie

Okay, look, as a preface: I do not hate Sylvie. I feel like I see a lot of hate for the character from a lot of people not Sylkie shippers, and I definitely do not hate her, even if the ship is something I struggle to see.

I actually like Sylvie's character a lot. She has had to struggle and fight and flee for something like a thousand years. I honestly don't begrudge her desire to stay in a quiet universe and just live a life. I want that for her, even.

Is she being a huge dick to Loki every time they interact this season? Yes. She refuses to listen to him (though he isn't being entirely straight with her either, to be fair), and she continually belittles his own choices and refuses to take responsibility for her own. She blames him and the TVA for the destruction of timelines, even though Dox's crew was, at the time, acting as a rogue element, and the issues that the timelines and TVA are currently facing are entirely her fault.

Again, I totally understand why she didn't listen to Loki at the end of season 1. It makes sense that she wouldn't want trust anything that He Who Remains had to say, and it makes sense that she wouldn't trust Loki at all. She barely knows him, and she's been alone her entire life. She doesn't really remember her life before the TVA ruined it. She has no friends, no allies. So yes, it was foolish of her to not stop and think for like ten seconds, but killing He Who Remains had been her ultimate goal for centuries. Of course she was going to do it.

HOWEVER. Because she killed He Who Remains, the multiverse is in danger. And just because I understand her inability to accept responsibility for her actions, does not mean I condone it. The lady is incredibly emotionally stunted. Of course she doesn't know how to take responsibility. She's been blaming other people for her problems her entire life (and most of that was 100% justified). To stop doing so now, when she hasn't had a chance to learn, would be bad writing.

I am all for a good character arc and a redemption story. Loki's himself has been...a little rushed. And they haven't touched on the trauma that was his time Before New York at all since that like, thirty seconds in season 1. Sure, he mentions NY a little flippantly here in season 2, but we all know that was just a way to get Mobius to talk. Point is, they have set Sylvie up for a good character arc, and kind of fast tracked Loki's without actually talking about some of the things I'm most interested in, but...eh, whatever. I can rant about that another time.

What I don't understand though, is Sylkie shippers. Like...number one, are we watching the same show? Season 1 seemed to have some unrequited pining going on, on Loki's side, especially before Loki and Mobius made up, but Sylvie has never shown any interest in Loki beyond that of a tentative ally. And really, there's no reason she should. When would Sylvie have had time, ever in her life, to think of romance beyond, possibly, an errant daydream? And this season, it really seems like she can hardly stand him.

Every time they interact, she lashes out, she tries to hurt him. She has told him, unequivocally, to leave her alone, multiple times. She listened to him say that he feared being alone most of all, and then she left him (I assume she has a tab at that bar, otherwise who the hell paid for those shots, and also, I've never met a bartender who would hear 'two bourbons' and just pour shots immediately, if it isn't a common order for that patron, but that's yet another rant for another day).

Like, she just seems to be going out of her way to be cruel, to drag him down, to blame him for everything, and to paint him as the bad guy. Sure, he wants to have his friends back, and maybe that IS selfish, but he ALSO wants to save the TVA because he believes that will save the multiverse, and that isn't, but she knows that once she pokes any holes in the story he's concocted for himself, he's only going to dwell on the bad side. Which he does. Her goal, I assume, is to get him out of her hair and leave her alone. She doesn't want to be involved with all this TVA stuff anymore. And...yeah, fair enough, except that the multiverse is actively disintegrating. Which is at least...oh, 45% her fault. (I'll grant that most of the fault lies on the heads of the old TVA, He Who Remains and Ravonna. And maybe like 3% Loki's fault. Everyone can take somewhat a share of the blame, but she really was trying to do the most. And she is the only one of our 'heroes' who hasn't taken any responsibility for the problems now facing the multiverse).

Look, I have shipped Loki with almost every single character he has had screen time with, if the story is well written enough for it to make sense. I've even read a Sylkie story that I actually managed to really get behind. (It took place before season 2, the premise being that in their fight at the Citadel, there was an accident and they ended up in Westview during the events of Wandavision, and were paired as a husband/wife duo for the show. It made sense, and there was enough of a build of their relationship that I was like...yeah, sure).

The writers of this show have NOT done their due diligence to make Sylkie make sense. In season 1, I could see that he might have a thing for her. But I never saw that being reciprocated.

Sylvie needs friends, she needs to learn how to trust, she needs stability, and she needs to figure out who she is as a person when she isn't on the run. She does NOT need a romance. A romance at this stage would be incredibly bad for her, really, if we give a shit about a fictional character's mental health.

I like Sylvie as a character. I think her arc has been interesting, but she is definitely still in the middle of it, and it is nowhere near resolved. I can't see a single instance in the show where she showed a romantic interest in Loki. (And...what, she kissed him? That was only to get him distracted enough to kick him out a time door so she could kill He Who Remains).

If this season ends with Sylkie endgame, I will have honestly lost faith in Marvel's ability to write a good story entirely. If they want the two of them to be together, they have to write them together. They have to actually be a team, not just constantly bickering (or in this season, Loki begging for her help and her telling him to stuff it). She only comes to help because her own universe gets shredded, not because she wanted to help Loki or save the other universes. She would not be good for him, at least not right now. That relationship would be hella toxic. Has she ever done anything for him? Just for him, not because he was useful to her in some way?

Look, TL;DR, I like Sylvie as a character and I want to see her grow and thrive, but Sylkie makes no sense and if they go that route this season it is bad writing. MCU has always been bad at romance and character development, but this would take the cake.

#loki #loki season 2 #spoilers #sylkie #anti sylkie #pro sylvie #rant #mcu #just show me where she ever once cared about Loki #where she acted in HIS best interest #why do people think she'd be good for him?

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rjshepofftheshits · 1 year

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Ok real talk tho, here is how they can improve dead space 3 for a remake.

Less focus on saving the world and more focus on the characters. i want to see isaac and ellie try to repair their relationship, i want to see carver go from grumpy git to isaacs friend and i want to see robert norton go from a good man with good intentions to someone who cracks under pressure, not because of some dumb jealousy thing with Isaac. if you were feeling REALLY spicy you could even make Danik a reasonable if categorically wrong man who eventually goes absolutely fruit loops by the end instead of starting out that way.

give isaac more story besides running after ellie. i know saving people, particularly the women in his life is a running theme with mr clarke, we do stan a feminist king. but he was perfectly capable of doing everything in dead space 1 WHILE ALSO looking for Nicole, his every other word wasn't about her. Dead space 3 makes me feel like he is only capable of pining after ellie and that is just not him. Isaac and ellie were together for 2-3 years, he knows her and he knows she can look after herself, it's the rest of the fucking universe that needs his competence and intelligence, not her. and if you must go this way, please don't make it another rescue mission. Again, ellie is a survivor and an intelligent person maybe even as smart as isaac she does not need saving.

also give the girl back her sports bra im sick of the cleavage. how she jumped 3 cup sizes is beyond me.

keep carver in the story but make him either an AI companion or do what NIER : Automata or RE2MAKE did. you play all the way through as isaac, then as carver and then once again as whoever for the ending OR you play all the way to the end as Isaac and then on a second playthrough you can be Carver and the way that you played as Isaac is now how your ai partner isaac behaves.

do not lock Carvers story behind coop missions. i know visceral didnt want to do this, they were made to by ea but still it seems like a dumb move even on their part. Carver didnt need to be there but since he is, why are you hiding that light under a bushel ea???

big one: get rid of the micropayments and retool the fucking weapons and combat. most of the guns are like water pistols and the necromorphs tank hits like brick shithouses. i know SCAF weapons are 200 years old by the time of dead space 3 but like. Isaac is smart enough to make a ripper, a line cutter and a plasma cutter on its own without bolting them together.

do not hide the true ending behind a dlc paywall. i think i was the only person on the planet that actually liked Awakened, better than the base game too. so it pains me to say that it didnt need to exist: either cut it completly and use it as the opening for dead space 4 or merge it into the ending of dead space 3 somehow.

lastly i think the story needs some tweaking. if we look at the progression it goes > outbreak on one ship > outbreak on a station> universe wide outbreaks everyone is doomed. now granted i understand you need to escate things for sequels but i just dont feel the same gravity of the situation in 3 as a did in 1 or 2. we never see the world outside isaacs pov which is fine but i would still like to see some of the world before it got fucked over a picket fence by the unitologists. the only glimpses we get are in text logs and it would make me feel more urgency to save the world if i actually knew what the world was like.

Continuing on with my story point: isaac needs some tweaks. he is a broken and cynical man by 3 which is very fair given all hes gone through but he is also a savior and defender at heart. no, he didnt ask for any of this but since he's stuck in this situation you know damn well he is going to do his best to fix this. I always found it weird that Isaac was essentially suicidal by the time of 3s opening, he was killing himself with indifference and clearly not looking after himself but when Norton comes knocking he still says "find someone else for your suicide mission" outright refusing all of it until ellie is mentioned. why didnt norton open with "ellie is in trouble, she sent us to get you to help" ? and why did isaac flat out refuse if he didnt care about his own life???

all this to say i would very much like to see isaac living a somewhat normal life after 2. ok maybe hes still depressed and alone but hes also still trying to move on, anything better to explain his reluctance to get dragged back into things . Maybe instead of having isaac backed into a corner and avoiding the world it could be more of a case of "i fucking told you so" like the mass effect series. Isaac has spent 2 games telling everyone who will listen "do not fuck with the markers" and now maybe he could be really fucking annoyed that no one has listened and as the only competent man in the galaxy hes got to go sort this shit out on principal.

here also are some things id just like to see.

Isaac struggling with his marker problem less like psychosis and more like a general disability or chronic illness. yes it sucks ass and yes its disabling but hes still a badass despite it. i dont like the wooohhhoooo mental illness scary vibes i get from other marker touched people like stross. thats just not how it works.

isaac with psysical scars from his time in project teleomere/ the hospital in dead space 2. i would like to see him with wounds from the first game healed and also maybe some marker scrawl on him as a permenant reminder of what happened.

id like to see ellie have a more active role or even be a playable character. doesnt have to be a big thing, do something like the born from a wish scenario in silent hill 2, maybe cover the 2 weeks she was lost in space before ds3 takes place.

id like to see the necromorph process slowed down. it happens so fast its almost meaningless, not to mention unbelievable. if it happens over time and the characters can see and react to it happening that has more emotional impact.

In the ending where carver and Isaac get blown off the platform, I want to see them holding hands to stay together.

if i think anymore ill put them in the reblogs or something

but yeah ea hit me up im ready to advise

or if ur not ea and just wana chat shite about dead space you can hit me up too

#shut up shepherd #dead space #dead space remake #dead space 3 #isaac clarke #john carver #ellie langford #robort norton

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plethoraworldatlas · 1 month

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Hour Of Joy Death Toll

Someone has finally counted all the dead bodies shown during the Hour of Joy Tape; In total, there are 264 confirmed deaths during the HOJ. While that's already insanely high and raises tons of questions (and further supports some theories), I fully believe the true death toll is even more.

The tape only shows a handful of locations, cutting all around and jumping forward to fit the list of the full hour into a 2 minute segment; Lobby, Game Station, a Train tunnel (there are multiple), two different backroom/tunnels/hallways, Playcare overview (only one specific angle), School, Make a Toy, the Walkways to Poppy's room. Furthermore, we only see people dressed as either scientists and researchers, suited business people, and a few hard hats.

We never see any of the actual production lines, never see any of the warehousing areas, never see any of the loading docks or shipping areas that we know exist (both because of the Huggy escape attempt tape and basic logic). Not only that, think about all the backrooms and hallways and tunnels you go through in just the first three chapters; Most of them still have blood splattered around, think how many got partially cleaned up when they moved to bodies (we know they cleaned up some due to how many bloody bodies in the HOJ tape are seen in areas that are fairly clean when we go to them).

Combine that with the fact that Playtime Co is basically the combination Hasbro and Disney in their universe, and the view of the factory we get during the news segment about the CatNap recall shows it as a enormous building stretching on beyond sight, with hundreds of smoke plumes. There's got to be at least multiple factories worth of production lines and work floors in there. It's gotta be at least as big as that nearly hundred Acre big Boeing plant; And that's just the above ground levels! Even with the automation (which we don't know for certain how much there is as make a friend looks to be a one off gimmick for the tours) we're talking thousands of factory line workers alone!

Factor in all the crazy sprawl going on, all the nooks and crannies, and the limitations on the locations and sheer number of cameras such a place would realistically have before saying "screw it, no on is robbing hallway #28-c without going through a dozen cams before that so no need for another useless angle".

Everyone, bar the player who wasn't there, died. And, remember the tour groups because the factory tours never stopped. And, all the people going there to try and adopt a kid at Playcare like the parents Stella talks too (they aren't factory employees, they're too surprised by everything). AND ALL THE KIDS! Because, even if the theory that the Prototype took them down with him to the depths is true, there's no way they all survived, no way none died during the Hour of Joy.

And I don't believe that he spared or "saved" any of the kids, Poppy was too broken up about how not even the innocent were spared and the Project Playtime has what's obviously the Prototype tell the monsters to spare literally no one 1. To feed the other experiments and 2. Because otherwise they'll make more experiments (ie, turn more kids into them. Since it's already alluded to that the Prototype had some way of taking over the minds of the other experiments to at least coordinate the HOJ, and he is a Cult leader level manipulator, it's within reason he'd convince the others that there's no way to save the kids or let them go and that they could only be "saved" by being killed before getting turned). Home Sweet Home has literally hundreds of beds, not including the Cradle rooms! And it's heavily implied they were packed to the point no one noticed when kids disappeared unless it was an actual adoption (probably rare but common enough not to draw too much suspicion) or one of the fake adoption/chosen going away ceremonies.

So, the population of at least a small town, including a full-fledged orphanage town, all disappeared one day, and no one looked in the building? Not one person got past the main entrance or through any loading docks to see anything?

I fully believe that Playtime had big financial backers behind the Bigger Bodies Initiative; Ones with even more desire for the BBI results than just the faint desire for immortality and resurrecting the dead that the original Poppy experiments started out as. Those experiments almost drove the company into financial ruin, and that was just drowning and reviving rats. Think about the experiments we see; Think about the BBI's justification anyway! Would it really make sense to put a bunch of Huggy's on a factory line when you got automated toy makers already? And why would literally any of them need fangs or the ability to crush heads with a single punch!?!

My bet is, once the original experiments started working enough for someone like Laith to notice and think it's not crazy enough to not try and get investors interested in funding immortality and resurrection experiments, they started going further until even that well started to run dry. Hence, Bigger Bodies, but not for the reasons we're lead to believe; I doubt the toy workforce idea was ever serious, frankly I doubt even Dr. Sawyer thought it was (though it would be funny and be in character for him to not realize he's working on a weapon and genuinely thinking he's making toy slaves). The only reason to go the way BBI went, to create such dangerous experiments, is if you want to end up with weapons and killing machines; Ones that are very stealthy.

If they had funding from someone who had the money to bail them out and fund a living toy weapons program, said person would definitely have the resources to at least lockdown the factory to keep their secrets.

#poppy playtime #hour of joy

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capcavan · 10 months

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AFTG tfc ch1 Re Read by cavan

(i do not remember any details so its almost like im reading it first time lmao) tumblr does not give me read more cut off option so deal with this i guess sorry #CavanrereadAFTG if you need to block it chapter 1 "She'd beat him to the hell and back if she saw him sitting around and mopping like that" is quite violent way to phrase "she woudl be displeased to see him .." so was neil casually beaten by his mom or we only on page 4 of neil backed up trauma management and im already thinking about scene where this boy will finally brek open and admit how much he wants normal life and not having to hide his emotions and you know live a little without this whole batman personal covering his face already hit by brain made connection about how exy is what took rikos life away from him and how it's the thing that kept neil alive through the worst of his here i am making it about this little cunt already but what else were you expecting of me?

learning new things about English language always nice! neil "its cool my mom died i can finally stay in one place for a bit" how had this boy not murdered this woman himself is beyond me fr ,, please go away" neil wymack already adopted you just haven't got the adoption papers yet I wonder if Janie Smalls is taller than Andrew Minyard "her best friend found her bleeding out" okay but - who is Janie's best friend is it one of foxes? what if it's seth ? Makes sense for it to be seth nvm friend explained to me that potential recruit means she was not at palmetto at the time " Typical of a fox " see riko would make amazing fox that's boy self destructive af in all of my head cannons

broadening my vocab nice nice Notorious for their tiny size i know it's bc there only 9 of them but i will stay believing it is bc everyone is short math time, had not seen kevin in 8 years neil is 18-19 now so he was 10 ok will remember Neil: i need to be very sneaky about my past wymack: do you need a pen? neil: i can't play for you because you signed kevin day wymack: ....... ??????? I LOVE HOW ANDREW WAY TO SAY HI IS FUCKING CRUSHING NEILS LUNGS AGAINST HIS SPINE ????? forgot how radioactive they are bc of how cute they are welp things align riko broke kevins hand andrew beat up neils internal organs for no reason at all! i love when all my ships are fucked up

assailant here is the word i keep using but spelling "assultant" lmao , man im learning so much ,, Andrew was blamed for kevins recent transfer" - kandrew is strong with this one ppl in universe just assumed kevin fell in love on first sight and they ARE RIGHT

i cant tell if im here to study cannon or english but like i know what those words mean but i don't know their definitions does that make sense? OH THIS IS SO CUTE I WILL DRAW THIS FUCK YES LETS GO he slammed motherfucker with his own racket dfghsdjfhgg Hernandez is literary the only normal person over the course of those 3 books andrew *assults someone as hello* wymack: Andrew's a bit raw on manners / my dude with this reading speed it will take me half year to go through those books but im having actually a lot of fun here neil: i already said i can not sign with you wymack:OK BUT YOU STILL NEED TO EXPLAIN WHY KEVIN DAY IS THE ISSUE HERE did kevin heard it lmoa i wonder if kevin heard the ,, do you need a pen - YoU sIgNeD KeViN DaY no wonder kevin was bitch to neil he thought the lil bitch hated him on the start lmao Andrew was only here because Kevin day never went anywhere alone here you go with your raven programming <3 YEARS SINCE THEY'D WATCHED NEIL'S FATHER CUT A SCREAMING MAN INTO HUNDRED BLOODY PIECES Kevin / Dark hair and green eyes, black number 2 neil saw that number and wanted to retch He and his adopted brother Riko Moriyama wrote the numbers one and two on their faces with markers, tracing them over and over anytime they started to fade. ok so were they drawing their own numbers? it sound like kevin was drawing his number too also this is the only mention i think of riko being reffered to as kevin,s brother in the books anyway I have case to make assuming kevin and riko were doing those numbers form young age pre 10 ... it just makes sense the system they use would be Arabic not roman i just can't imagine small kids knowing roman numbers when they were neglected in nest i think this is best case i can make for it. friend provided proof that in book the four tattoo neil get's is introduced as "4" so ok arabic canon moving on Riko nad Kevin were inducted to national court 1 year pre aftg story starts They were champions and neil was a jumble of lies and dead-ends on one hand it's funny how desperate they all are to sign neil on other hand i deeply believe they just see the desperation in his eyes, we know that neil wants it and those contact lenses do not hide it , they know that he wants to say yes, they are just confused about what the fuck makes him say no (kevin's bitchiness) or at least i would make this be the case if neil didn't just got assaulted and if they didn't literary phrased it as ,, we are not living without you signing this" like .. kidnapping with extra steps much ???? playing like he has everything to lose is not excuse for you all to harass this poor man like that OK HOLD ON A SECOND "He'd remember the scrimmage interrupted by that man's murder"

what man what murder the man nathan butchered for them? did nathan murdered someone during game?

WHAT HAPPENED

the moment kevin would start looking at him funny- he already is ngl im only on page 12 and i just hate neils mom i have no phrasing for it but the fact that every choice neil could make for his happiness is meet with ,, mom would be sooo mad" is really frustrating to read about... what is the point of even being alive for this boy fr???? i wonder if theres any specific place they would have been safe it? kind of would be fun to have au where neil and his mom go to japan and end up getting protection form yakuza F BOMB 1 F BOMB 2 COMBO fuck i love those characters so much okay like all of them It's about second chances, Neil. Second, third, fourth, whatever, as long as you get at least one more than what anyone else wanted to give you"

David "idealistic idiot" Wymack wymacks sincerity is what lets foxes trust him , wymack is the first adult in their lives that understands Savge yank of her hands in his hair here we go fuck he has so much guilt over trying to live a little this is so un fair "I'm sorry"he gasped out between wet coughs. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry"

#aftg #all for the game #tfc #the foxhole court #nora sakavic #neil josten #kevin day #andrew minyard #riko moriyama #CavanrereadAFTG

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3vocatio · 2 years

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Hello hello! Quite fun being the one to send you an ask for once, genuinely thought you’d remain a mystery to me forever lmao >w<

Anyway! While going through your blog I saw your tags on your most recent reblog of that Solomon post that’s been going around and I have to say—I’m happy to see that you also noticed that particular aspect of Solomon and Asmo’s relationship, that Sol doesn’t particularly trust him or put him on equal footing. I don’t recall what specifically gave me this impression, but I’ve always thought that they must’ve had something of a tumultuous relationship over the years, and that it’s only gotten okay around the time of the exchange program; because even though they were on good terms, according to the relationship chart the devs published (presumably around launch which is also the the time I’m assuming that Asmo’s Chapter A cards came out?) Solomon still viewed him as a tool/toy. I feel like there were moments as well that hinted that he wasn’t super happy with how overly close Asmo was behaving in S1 but I’m not sure.

And even with more recent things like Solomon saying he has trouble refusing Asmo in S3 after you meet the brothers in the human world, I kind of figured that it’s because it’s just easier to indulge him. But maybe it’s because I personally have more cynical takes on the characters’ relationships with each other? Because after some of the hard mode scenes in S2 I found myself enjoying a less rainbow and sunshine filled reading on everyone’s relationships and that there’s still plenty of baggage that hinders full trust and vulnerability.

Then again, we have Solomon saying that he still views pacts as business deals as recently as his last birthday, with Barbatos agreeing. So maybe my less fluffy takes still hold some water >.<

Anyway. Sort of just wanted to bring up Sol and Asmo because I also hardly see anyone talk about them beyond the ship + fanservice Solmare doles out and am dying to hear more about the complexities of their relationship beyond that >.< Hello again!! Still so crazy to know your personal blog omg

welcome to my abode! truth be told, i never intended on being mysterious forever. i'm someone who enjoys the satisfaction of watching others piece the puzzle together, and it goes for many occassions; my favorite being the way my friends attempt to figure out my oc lore with what information (writing) i've cleverly set out for them to find. here are some highlights from last night with a friend who refused to sleep until they've figured one (1) small piece of lore.

it's insane to think that it all inherently connects with the obm universe (because it's [godtongue]'s lore), but can easily be it's own concept without it. speaking of her ... i haven't forgotten about your other responses! i have answers for each of them neatly placed in my priv server ready to be revisited. ;)

i think you might be interesting in reading a recent ask i sent to /@.bbnibi regarding a bit of solomon's views on demons—once they respond to it of course. you mused that solomon doesn't typically like the way asmodeus behaves, and i'd like to mention that i can recall countless of times where this is something that consistently occurs. the way solomon responds to asmodeus' “i love you!”s with a curt, “i know.”? the way he went out of his way to reverse asmo's manipulative gaze when he streamed live to his audience? in the chat for, “letter from the devildom”, solomon doubted that asmodeus would be able to send any form of sincere letter. in the audio drama with sol & asmo, solomon was intensely disappointed (but not surprised) that after centuries of knowing each other, asmo knew nothing about him while mammon did. the list goes on.

imo, the only way for him to actually ensure a good relationship with someone like asmodeus (for the sake of keeping pactmates satisfied in order for them to be more willing to commit greater acts in return) is to partake in simple acts that otherwise bring no harm. persuasion doesn't seem to happen with him. if it's in his best interest, what he'd like to do anyway, or something he consider low-stakes and maybe fun to mess with, he'll let you ‘persuade’ him. he's the gatekeeper here, not you.

this is exceptionally evident in one of s4's lessons (hard mode of lesson 69) where solomon walks in on the royals mentioning him in reference to how he holds a grim reaper's emotions in the palm of his hands.

to which barbatos acts as though nothing was ever mentioned.

i don't think your view on relationships in obm is cynical in nature at all—i think that everything is laid out before the player if they choose to see it. in this specific scenario, i don't believe that solomon considers any of the cast as close friends, even simeon. solomon went out of his way to confront simeon, dealt with his blatant denial of everything that was going on alongside his sheer disrespect towards him, and yet solomon still didn't think ill of him. he knows so much about simeon and yet, can simeon say the same for solomon?

he rarely shares personal things about himself with other people, which is a juxtaposition of sorts, because what he craves most are meaningful conversations and interactions (see: lesson 46). the clincher is that while he wants to know ALL about you, he will often hold back in sharing much about who he is and what he emotionally needs from the people around him. i can't blame him, though. there isn't anyone who is able to provide him with that in the ways that matter.

apologies for the ramble, although i know you don't mind reading longer posts ^^ after seeing a recent poll of 1k+ people on twitter regarding the popularity of characters, it irked me how solomon placed 11th due to people thinking of him as someone bland and irritating (satan placed 2nd, though). i suppose that's why i'm in the mood to talk so much about solomon—to compensate for what newer players perceive him to be.

#obey me spoilers #obey me solomon #﹒❝ birdsong #rsmrymnt-tea #my posts

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criscura · 2 years

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Have you thought about doing other stories within the universe of your Tumbling Down story? Like how Mumen and Sonic or Badd and Garou got together? Tumbling Down was Saitama and Genos' story but the bits given about the other two couples made me want more. Like what was the stuff Sonic was dealing with that Saitama mentioned not to mention a good boy like Mumen finding good in Sonic. Or what Badd and Garou saw in eachother when their both hotheads, did Zenko play winggirl for her brother?

OKAY SO

if I spent any amount of time on them, I tried to figure out a little bit of the characters' backstory. I don't know that I'd write them--I sort of like having them be just bits in the background, and it's tough to make such a longterm thing with ships that I like but I'm not as invested in--BUT

I can at least explain how it happened XD Mumen, Sonic, Badd, and Garou's stories under the cut <3<3

Mumen was still with his fiance May when TD started. His running into Sonic in "Window Shopping" was when they first met, and when Saitama said that Sonic wasn't causing trouble so long as he was with them, Mumen really took that to heart. He started tailing Sonic for as long as he could to stop him from stealing anything or hurting anyone. Sonic was PISSED at first, but it turned into just another thing he had to deal with...until Mumen followed him "home" and realized the ninja was living in whatever empty spaces he could. Sonic hated him knowing about that part of his life, but Mumen was horrified. It became a new part of his self-appointed mission--bringing food, water, sheets, etc., in hopes that if Sonic was more comfortable, maybe he wouldn't be desperate enough to do such awful things to get by.

Of course this is eating up a lot of his time, and while May's used to him being out a lot of the time, he's even more distant than usual. Not mean, but distracted. He's mentioned Sonic and she's getting suspicious, especially when he's running off at all hours to try and help him. She doesn't think he's cheating, at least not at first--he's way too honest for that--but then he comes home one day with a very different vibe and they need to have a talk.

It was after he nearly stayed the night with Sonic because he was real fuckin' sick. Mumen (very belatedly, honestly) realized that not only did he not mind taking care of him, he was excited to get to spend more time with him, in a way that had gone beyond what a good Samaritan or even a friend would do. He thought Sonic was funny and charming and passionate and weirdly innocent in his own outlandish way, and he wanted more of that. He *understood *it...and it was something he couldn't ever share with May. Mumen was attracted to him too, and Sonic seemed like he reciprocated (with the added danger that he didn't give two shits about Mumen already being engaged if it seemed like his heart wasn't in that relationship anymore). However Mumen is a Very Good Boy and he *wouldn't *cheat, so he needed to talk things over with May first before they did anything.

After a bit they realized they were more getting married because that was what they were supposed to do rather than what they truly wanted. While they did care about each other a lot, it wasn't in a romantic way. They split (I think Mumen left her the apartment), and Mumen told Sonic to move in with him when he found a new place. Around then was when Sonic started to seriously rethink his lifestyle. Being with Mumen in a stable home, taking care of and being taken care of by someone you really loved, having the opportunity to fall into a deep sleep without worrying that you're going to be found out or attacked.... It was all way too much and too tempting for him, and he decided he wanted to change. And that was pretty much it for them. Low and slow, with a bit of a dramatic start ;;;

Badd and Garou just follow the fucking trajectory set up for them in the manga honestly XD I mean they've already got chemistry up the fucking waZOO. They're already fully together when TD starts. For how they fell into it, though, I think they run into each other and fight, or one of them seeks the other out, and both of them being who they are don't care much about their pasts as long as they aren't shitty now. I think they might've had a full on fighting-to-fucking moment (or close to it). After that it was a puppy love ordeal where neither of them had dated before and they didn't know how to conduct themselves. Maybe they tried in vain to go about dating in the traditional way, only to realize neither of them had the patience for it and they'd much rather just violently fuck before getting a pizza. Truly boys being boys but like. In the sweet way XD

Zenko does get pissed off and tries to help, but they're kinda lost causes. She gets another big brother, though, and Badd--for fucking ONCE--is smiling more than he's frowning, so she's honestly ecstatic. She's SO HAPPY her brother found someone who makes him look that excited to come home from work every day that isn't just her and their cat.

Badd and Garou get a lot more flack for their relationship from the HA than any other couple, though, because Garou wreaked so much havoc so publicly for so long. It's impossible to frame their relationship in a way that won't reflect really poorly on the association. Amai is convinced if they're too open about it, it's going to look like the HA set up Garou's mission or that not even the S-class care that much about keeping the world safe from monsters, and they're gonna start to lose donations for a fund that's already not really cutting it. He's a lot harsher on them than anyone else. They're pissed but it doesn't really stop them. Garou lives with them, after all--no matter what Badd's coming home to him at the end of the night, and in the morning the whole family's gonna wander bleary-eyed into the kitchen for breakfast (kitty included).

#tumbling down #mumen #sonic #piglet #speedal #metal bat #garou #batarou #fic

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quietwingsinthesky · 2 months

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destiel and wincest for the ship ask game :))

destiel

you know, what could have been an interesting ship has been so thoroughly destroyed by bland fanon and overrunning the website with it that my only reaction is Shut The Fuck Up. you know how people have taken saying “read any other book” to harry potter fans? Discuss Any Other Ship. the only people who should be allowed to still talk about destiel are the people who are properly freaks about it.

i pray every day that a supernatural revival brings castiel back played by a woman and that’s the only way reciprocal destiel happens. i think that would be hilarious. i would love to watch a bunch of people who are so proud of themselves for shipping this Revolutionary Queer Ship™️ stumble and fall on their faces if it worked out like that. i guarantee you no one would care that Cas has always been technically canonically genderless the whole time. how do i put it. people could hallucinate a whole finale they were denied for that gay angel when he was shaped like the man they were attracted to. they wouldn’t bother to put any amount of effort into embracing it as still being a queer narrative if cas took the body of a woman, nevermind that if that did happen, it would be arguably even more queer then before. can’t hit a character with the transfem beam just to make the ship “straight” without making everything else a lot more funky around it! but it is very obvious to me, given the disconnect between what’s in the show and what people claim about destiel, that the majority of investment has very little to do with the characters themselves and a lot more to do with the attractiveness of their male actors.

wincest

so anyway, you know how everything im annoyed with about destiel is about how there’s not much investment in the show itself or its themes or the characters beyond how they serve to further a ship? so like. having been in both circles. wincest isn’t like that. there’s people who annoy the fuck out of me in wincest circles, who i think have awful takes or are just assholes, because that’s how being a fandom is. but like. at least they do the reading, you know? the thing about supernatural, and if you’re someone who has followed me only since i started doccy whoing and only knows about spn through tumblr/destiel osmosis, i’m either sorry to inform you and/or delighted to tell you, the thing about supernatural is that it’s about incest. i’m not trying to do a shipping gotcha, i’m not being competitive about who is more canon here. incest is in the text. eric kripke did not fight the network to have mary winchester kiss her father on the mouth to sell sam’s soul to the demon who would later infect his blood with a curse he could never scrub out for people to pretend like this show isn’t about incest. they reference it in the show by name multiple times when talking about the in-universe fandom of the winchester brothers. this is what the show is about. (which. the fact that this isn’t just common knowledge and people unfamiliar with the fandom know more about destiel is so funny to me. no one goes up to game of thrones and tries to say it isn’t kicked into motion because of jaime and cersei fucking and is instead about the love story of bronn and jaime.)

it’s one thing not to engage with it out of discomfort, i understand that, one of my friends doesn’t because that themes genuinely makes him nauseous. but like. that’s what the show is about. it’s about sam and dean’s codependence and how it destroys them and every relationship they have with the people around them. its about how there’s still a core of love so powerful it can beat the devil even surrounded by all that sickness and abuse. the show never stops being about sam and dean. the center was always meant to be “family is hell.”

so what i’m saying is. i vibe with wincest a hell of a lot. this is a theme that i love. i’m a little freak who likes when gothic horror is about two siblings holding on too tight when the house crumbles down on top of them. i love that the show goes hard on placing sam and dean as brothers being on the same level or above their romantic entanglements. and like. also incest kink. but mostly, i find engaging with the text of the show from a wincest lines fascinating, because it isn’t about fighting the show as it is to get the narrative you want. it’s about interpreting what was laid out for you, on purpose.

like. the way i see the great fandom war between these two ships is: you can either look at Sex and Violence and say ‘oh this is proof dean is into dudes and also cas because the siren sort of looks like cas’ or you can say ‘the siren literally word for word says that he lured dean in by playing along as the little brother that dean needs right now as he feels sam slipping away from him and choosing ruby instead.’

wincest wins. it’s in the name.

[put any ship in my ask box and i’ll give my brutally honest opinion]

#ask #tw incest #spn #anon i hope you wanted paragraphs because if you ever ask me about spn you get paragraphs.#its the autism

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takaraphoenix · 2 years

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for the ask game DC and 1, 2, 3, 4?

Thanks for playing :)

1. Favorite platonic ship.

Oh, that is a tough one actually.

I love Terry McGinnis and Marina Curry in the Batman Beyond universe a whole lot and it's the freshest in my mind right now since I just wrapped that read.

I also love, if it's done right, Bruce and Clark's friendship. You know, in the cases where they do get to be friends and Bruce isn't the "I am the night I need to be alone and keep everyone at arm's length" kind.

And if I go by canon alone (because fanon wise I prefer them as a romantic ship), Damian Wayne and Jon Kent would probably take the crown actually? But like I said, tough one. There's probably like two dozen more that I can't think of right now.

And in what is the most literal definition of "platonic" (I find it fascinating how that word just came to mean non-romantic/sexual), Arthur Curry and Jackson Hyde! Teacher and his mentor, in a non-romantic/sexual manner. I love them.

Oh, oh, also Harley and everyone she gets to team up with, I love how universal that is and how great it is every single time!

2. Favorite familial ship.

Kara and Clark, I wish we would get more canon interactions for them in like... anything. Comics, shows, movies, just give me more of them. I hate when the writers decide to make Clark super awkward about Kara and Conner and keep them at arm's length.

Cassandra and Stephanie, if that counts as familial? I honestly lose track of which Bat Fam members are Officially AdoptedTM and which aren't (keep hearing people talk about Tim as an official Wayne but everything I've read so far still had him have two living parents......). I really love their sister like relationship, whether they're official adopted siblings or "just" sisters in the sense of both being Bat Fam members, I love them either way.

3. Favorite romantic ship.

Ngl, this is surprisingly easy to pick for me still. Even though I could easily write a top 25 list for this fandom without blinking, my top stop has been and will probably always be Diana and Clark.

4. Favorite problematic ship.

Gosh, aren't most? You can find something "problematic" about probably every single ship in some way. So let's see what's the most problematic one is I can come up with that I love the most.

John Constantine and Lucifer Morningstar? How much more problematic can it get than with the devil himself. And John. I feel like John alone is problematic enough to turn up every ship's rating ;D

Ship Ask Game

#Shipping #DC Comics #Ship Ask Game #send me asks

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clockworksteel · 2 years

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Been noticing lately that as part of gender questioning, I seem to have a bit of a mental barrier that's located roughly around the midpoint of the spectrum of typical genders that's been a barrier to healthy experimentation (even if I'm guessing I'm nonbinary, it seems important to at least try what I can while I'm in a questioning mood). Thing is... I'm not entirely sure what the barrier is made of. Like... is it cult programming from being raised Mormon? Social programming from living in a society? Fear of what others would think? Impostor syndrome? I've just started calling it The Rubicon. This is of course a reference to R-Type Final's RX-12 Cross The Rubicon, which pushed the inclusion of Bydo in ships beyond their limits and led to the B-series such as B-1B Mad Forest. Or, you know, a reference to that whole thing with Caesar and Rome, I think it was.

Thing is... the implications are totally different depending on which reference I'm actually making. If I were to cross the barrier, would I unlock new options but still have the ability to go back and choose R-Series genders if I wanted (okay, maybe forcing the reference there), or would it truly be a point where the only way is forward due to discovering something that cannot be forgotten or ignored (is this an invasion of Rome or the Cthluhu mythos)? Of course, in R-Type Final, while the player can go back and choose other ships, I suppose in-universe humanity accepting the development of ships full of alien infestation represents a lot more.

Anyway, this post isn't about actually sorting out any of that, but about finding amusement in where, exactly, said barrier seems to be and/or just mentioning how things are going. I remarked to a friend recently that although I haven't crossed the barrier, it may have moved a bit closer to Rome at some point. Also, I'll mention The Valiey a couple times: it's the discord server associated with egg_irl (normally that I is capitalized and Discord's font make it look exactly like an l).

Voice Acceptable Activities: Collecting bookmarks related to voice training, lurking voice training discussion in The Valiey, trying to sing high parts in songs while alone (it doesn't go great, especially if I listen to myself try without the songs playing, but perhaps not as badly as one might guess), thinking about how cool it would be to be able to slip into a feminine voice during dialog as appropriate for when I'm recording Youtube videos Locked: Opening the voice training videos, which are probably badly needed if I wanted to get "Resonance" right (I've been lurking some voice training discussion and don't have a clear idea of what that is, but it's definitely not all about pitch and my pitches are probably fine if the rest of me was at all convincing)

Clothing Acceptable: Picking up an oversized T-shirt (by 2 sizes) at Wal-Mart and wearing it late at night and to bed, already owning some rainbow striped socks that go up to around the knees, thinking about getting taller socks (probably the next thing I'll actually do but haven't gotten around do it so just thinking for now), wondering where the measuring tape got to in case I need some measurements to use with size charts like for a skirt, imagining having a skirt, planning on getting a pair of more feminine glasses next time I routinely get glasses (I get 2 pairs at a time with my vision plan) Locked: Going through with buying a skirt or dress

Video Games (general) Acceptable: Choosing female characters a lot. I've already mentioned this. Locked: Naming a female character "Clyceer". This one might be because of a particular discussion where within a group of friends about an OC named Clyceer that by that point was half self-insert and half somebody-else-inserted-me. He had transformation powers but it was decided they'd only be used in cis ways. I guess I call it a discussion but really it was "I asked the only girl in the group if they'd be comfortable with him having female forms and she said no." This probably happened back when I was in high school.

Visual Novels Acceptable: Taking an interest in any visual novel my housemate plays. Locked: Playing otome games personally (Or maybe it's just that I already pretty much know what happens on most of the ones we own? I only caught a couple routes from Cafe Enchante though, mostly just that nerd Angel's actually).

Telling people I'm questioning my gender Acceptable: Shouting into the void that is tumblr. Joining The Valiey and introducing myself as questioning and setting my pronouns on that server to just they/their/them rather than having it be after "he/his/him or" like on Tumblr and Youtube. Locked: Telling my nonbinary housemate that I'm questioning. I don't think they've seen any of the tumblr posts, but they probably know something by now. I've mentioned The Valiey (but not what it is) and pointed out funny stuff like someone painting the trans flag on a virtual car and someone else joking that it can now double jump (Celeste reference). Plus they know about the oversized shirt and the rainbow socks of course. Also, people who are definitely cis probably don't suddenly mention Blahaj (the IKEA shark) a few times within the space of a week. Of all the mental barriers this one is probably the silliest. Super Double Locked: Telling any family members I'm questioning. Now this one is just reasonable.

Hair Actually, I think I'm just lazy about this. I'd absolutely remove all the arm/leg/chin/neck hair if it was easy and wouldn't be super uncomfortable after a couple days. Maybe it makes sense to wait until after winter before trying anything at this point though. Already almost officially fall. I think I've been doing the regular shaving a bit more frequently though. I guess I'm not sure of actually growing the top-of-head hair out ever. I visit my parents too often for it to be a thing I could just try.

Makeup Actually, due to sensory integration disfunction, this just seems unpleasant no matter what I realize about gender. Maybe if truly necessary I'd try something.

Other notes unrelated to the main subject of the post:

I've also saved some exercises that were shared alongside some transfem memes and have tried them, although I probably need something easier for the lower torso area. Still, the idea that I could make my build even slightly more feminine through exercise is oddly motivating.

I started developing a habit of crossing my legs (at the ankles) and have a couple bookmarks for reddit threads where other habits were being discussed (or at least asked about: I'll have to check back to see if there's substance)

Lately I've also just felt more motivated to do things around the house. The dishes have been more routinely getting done and other things have been getting cleaned up.

I hope R-Type Final 2 goes on a good sale soon. I also like that the only links in the post are to the R-Type wiki. I am, in fact, still a gamer.

How'd 1.5 hours pass just now? Did I really spend that long on this? It's bedtime.

#clockwork-gender

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five-rivers · 3 years

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Three Twilights

Can be considered a loose sequel to Deep Sea Diver (same vibes).

Warnings: Soft body horror, Danny totally ignoring objectively horrifying things

“I was thinking,” started Maddie over breakfast, “we could start observations of that island that came into view last week, the blue one.”

Danny shook his head. “You’ll have to use the Speeder, then,” he said. “I’ve got an errand to run.”

There was a pause as both of Danny’s parents looked at him, confused. He didn’t blame them. Danny rarely went out as a human anymore, and certainly not for anything like errands. Looking like he was still fourteen after all this time made doing anything even remotely official difficult.

But this wasn’t a human errand. “Yeah,” said Danny. “In the Ghost Zone. I’ve got to go to Three Twilights.”

“Where?” asked Jack.

“It’s, um, a city,” said Danny. “Well, three cities, I suppose, depending on how you want to group them. One Realm. On the shores of the Celestial Sea. I’m sure I’ve put it in your files.” Probably a direct copy from his files from before he came clean to them, but still. He stirred his cereal counterclockwise, letting his ice powers chill the milk.

“Yes,” said Maddie, “but there are a lot of places in there. I’m not sure we’ve had a chance to properly look at them all, much less memorize them.”

“Okay, yeah,” said Danny. “I guess that makes sense.”

“What kind of errand are you running, Danno?”

“I’m picking something up for a friend. A book,” he clarified. “They lent it to someone there, but they need it back.”

“A book,” said Maddie. “For the Library of Tongues?”

“No, they’ve got a contract service for overdue loans.”

“Contract service?” asked Jack.

“Yeah. Moonlighting bounty hunters mostly.”

“For a library?”

“I don’t know what to tell you,” said Danny, shrugging. “They’re really serious about their work.”

“If it isn’t for them, who is it for?” asked Maddie. “The princess? Wulf?” Wulf had actually been over a few times, and his parents had… Well, saying they got along would be an overstatement, they didn’t really have anything in common beyond ripping portals in the fabric of the universe, but everyone had been civil. “The boy at the school?”

“No,” said Danny. “Wulf would just get it himself.”

“Who, then?” pressed Maddie.

Danny put a spoonful of cereal in his mouth, delaying. Maddie hadn’t eaten anything since Danny had mentioned the errand. The errand was, in fact, for Clockwork. Danny was always more than happy to do anything for Clockwork. The older ghost had saved him too many times for him to be otherwise. But Jack and Maddie were wary of Clockwork. Danny didn’t get it, but talking about it hadn’t been productive so far.

He didn’t want to lie to his parents. Not ever again.

“It’s for Clockwork,” he said.

Ah, yes, there were those suspicious looks. The ones Danny could have interpreted even without being able to almost literally taste emotions.

“I see,” said Maddie.

“Anyway,” said Danny, quickly, “if I haven’t shown you Three Twilights yet, it’s really cool. I don’t want to take the full rig, but maybe the little ectocam would be okay? The one that I can clip on.”

“Why not the normal camera with an ectofilter?” asked Jack. “That has more features, and it’s easier for us to get data from.”

“Three Twilights. It’s dark there,” said Danny. “It might work in Civila, but not so much in Naŭtika and Astronomia, and I sort of want to go down to the beach and see if I can find any star pearls, and that’s really dark, so if you want to see anything properly, it’ll have to be the sonar setup, which I’m not doing, the noises that thing makes are offensive, or the ectocam.”

“And the Fenton Phones?” asked Maddie.

“Sure,” said Danny. “But I always bring those.”

“Yes,” said Maddie, after a moment. “You do.”

“Great. It’s settled, then.”

Most of the journey to Three Twilights could be made by air. Or, rather, what passed for air in the Infinite Realms. But when the rocky edge of an island came into view, Danny touched down. Further in was a blue wood, and Danny walked under its inviting branches.

The atmosphere started sunny, summery. The leaves and needles of the trees were the color of a clear blue sky. But as he got deeper, the leaves were touched with sunset colors: golds, reds, oranges, purples, and pinks. They fell to the ground, crunching beneath Danny’s feet. The sunset grew longer, deeper. The leaves on the trees grew sparser, revealing patches of sky.

By the time only bare branches framed the sky, it was a dusky, dim, purple. A few lonely stars twinkled in the sky.

He passed out of the forest. The city of Civila rose above him. Windows glowed in the near dark like eyes.

Danny had changed, too. His aura had dimmed. The whites of his suit were now dark gray, and patterns swirled on its surface like camouflage, like wind-twisted clouds, like nebulae.

Shadows bled around the corners of the city buildings like ink in water. Will-o-the-wisps bobbed, casting pools of illumination in lieu of streetlamps. Ghosts walked up and down the streets, or floated only a few meters up.

The buildings glittered. Everything was dark, vibrant, colors. A sharp, sweet scent filled the air, something dark and rich beneath it.

The canals in the center of the street were filled with flashing fish. Or perhaps serpents. Or perhaps worms. Between how fast they moved and the dimness of the light, it was difficult to tell.

Danny could feel his irises contracting, shrinking down to needle-thin rings. His teeth were sharp. He matched the other ghosts around him. This was how the Civila liked it, how things were in this part of Three Twilights.

Everything in order. Everything peaceful. Everything civil.

Danny walked through the market square, and bought some charcoal-colored cherry pastries from a vendor who looked like someone’s nightmare demon with a chip of ghost ice.

Much to his parents’ protests. They didn’t care for him eating ghost food.

There were seven bridges to Naŭtika, which was built half underwater and half on boats that floated both on the water and in the air. As the dark waters of the inlet lapped at his feet, Danny felt the changes ripple across his skin. To a human, he would look pure black, except for the faintest glimmer of rim lighting and the stars of his eyes. He and the other ghosts moved silently, cutting through the waters like shadows.

To Danny’s ghostly senses, the place was alive with emotion and force, energy loud and crackling against his senses.

“We’re solely on the ectocam, now,” said Maddie. “You were right about that.”

“Mhm,” said Danny, half distracted by a whispered sea-shanty backed by a choir of not-voices and not-sound that wove together with the mastery of a hundred years of practice.

He glided up a rope net, and began to navigate the ropes to the taller ships. The very tallest, the ones that scraped the ever-darkening sky and blotted out uneven sections of stars, moored the glass-like ships that floated above. He’d need to reach them, to get to Astronomia.

“What’s that?” asked Maddie, breaking his concentration on his path.

“What’s what?” asked Danny, whisper soft, drawing some looks. He turned, slowly, on the spot, planks barely creaking under his steps. A gentle wind ruffled his hair.

“There,” said Maddie. “By the ghost that’s registering red.”

It had taken Danny a long time to learn what color on the ectocam’s artificial sensor signified what, but he had, if only to reduce the guessing when they played this game.

“Star pearls,” said Danny, eyeing the ropes of stone that glimmered brighter than his eyes currently did. They were one of the only reliable forms of light, out on the Celestial Sea, although they were valued for other things, too.

“They’re putting out a massive amount of energy,” said Maddie.

“You mentioned them before,” said Jack. “You wanted to look for some?”

“On the shore,” said Danny. “Out past Astronomia.” He wanted to find his own, rather than buy them.

Partially because they were expensive. He didn’t really want to think about how much unmelting ice he’d have to conjure up to equal one of them. They were usually bartered in exchange for… more significant things.

The ghost by the pearls beckoned him closer, clearly hoping to make a sale. Danny shook his head, broadcasting regret and admiration for his wares. Speech might be faster but, under these circumstances, it would not be polite.

When Danny left, the social rules of Three Twilights would only leave the faintest impression on his mind. But, for now, they were a heavy, but not uncomfortable weight. One he could shrug off if necessary, but which was currently useful.

“What are they?” asked Maddie, as Danny turned away.

“They happen when big enough things fall into stars,” said Danny. “They’re all the memories of what they used to be… and the imagination of what they could become, when the star dies. Well, that’s what they’re supposed to be. I don’t think anyone really knows for sure.”

“And you can just… find these? Lying around?”

“Not… not really,” said Danny, slowly drifting towards a crow’s nest. “It’s like that one national park. That one where you can collect diamonds? You never really find anything good, but you can look.”

“I see,” said Maddie. “So, you don’t expect to find one?”

“Yes and no,” said Danny. “If I don’t expect to find one, I probably won’t. Unless the sea is feeling ironic, which it usually is, apparently. I mean, it’s an ocean and the stars. And prophecy is, like, ninety percent irony, but mostly for an outside observer. Which honestly makes sense, I think. An observer, not an Observant. Those are different things.”

The kind of silence on the other side of the line was the one that emerged when Danny used too much ghost logic.

“Anyway,” he continued as he scaled the crow’s nest and started traversing the glass ropes and chains to the all-but-invisible glass ships, “no, I don’t really expect to.”

The path to Astronomia was a staircase carved from moonstone harvested in October, when the moon was full and orange-red. It burned Danny’s eyes to look at and feet to walk upon. Like many ghosts who fixated on things like astronomy, he adapted quickly and thoroughly to the spiritual dark.

This darkest twilight was built of delicate bubbles, whorls, and arches of glass, any of which could cradle a ghost, all of which could be phased through with impunity. There were no true roads here, but certain places were easier to travel through. Addresses were carved in the glass in glimmering, holographic sigils made from glass-caught starlight that humans would never be able to read, but Danny could understand with a glance. It was not silent in Astronomia, the high wind sung through the glass like the immense instrument it was, playing ethereal and eternal music that mirrored heaven.

As always, Danny was enraptured. Perhaps the stars here were not true stars, only their memory and imagination (or simulacra made from stripped ghost cores, he remembered with a shudder), but he felt so close here.

“Danny? Are you still with us?”

Danny started to reply, but realized he had forgotten, once again, that he had no mouth here.

A phantabulist played a story for a group of not-quite-children, characters made of carefully constructed light chasing each other about with vigour. Danny stopped for a while to watch the story, a parable about spiders and fish. They were common here, storytellers who plied their craft this way. The stories could be pressed into glass prisms and orbs that served as books and viewed even in other environs of the Ghost Zone.

He moved on, passing through a glass bubble full of ghosts that snatched at and stroked him as he passed by, leaving stars and dark clouds to swirl across his skin. His suit had long since smoothed over and sunk in. His skin was a thin surface, a membrane holding in liquid night. He was like smoke, like vapour, thin and easily overlooked.

The places he passed were homes, places of business, warehouses, and hotels, organized without any apparent reason. A phantabularium glowed like a struck match, snatches of story visible inside its walls. He walked by.

Eventually, he reached the palace at the city center.

The ghost who lived there was old. Older, perhaps, than Pandora. She filled the vessels of her palace in placid pools connected by crystalized threads and looping tubes. Seven round-bottom flasks, radiating outward, like the spheres of heaven. The music here was almost deafening.

This was Urania, Muse of Astronomy. Astronomia was her city, and subordinate to her will before all else.

Danny resisted the urge to kneel. He was not here as a supplicant, and they both knew it.

The lowest pool bubbled, and slowly a glass prism, a dodecahedron, floated to the top. Danny took it with careful hands and left Urania’s direct presence as quickly as possible.

Being near her was always difficult. She was the Muse of Astronomy, and she felt he did not indulge his second Obsession as much as was proper.

Indeed, she thought it should be his first.

(The starlight inside him pulsed. He was never sure how much influence Urania could exert on him when he visited Three Twilights, never sure how much the relationship between his passions shifted when he was here. He loved it here too much to stay away forever.)

Astronomia did not end all at once. Instead, as one walked farther from the palace, the delicate, clear glass was replaced by black sand. When Danny had feet again, and could feel the grains beneath them, he knew he was no longer in Astronomia, but on the Shores of Night. The Isles of the Moon were faintly visible in the distance, sea-spray framing them in silvery halos.

He felt human here. His breath moved in his lungs, and his skin rose in goosebumps, the sleeves of his t-shirt fluttering in the wind. The sea and the sky were the same, and twice as beautiful for it.

“Sorry for going silent on you there,” said Danny. “I keep forgetting I don’t have a mouth there.”

“How do you forget that?” asked Jack.

“I don’t know.” Danny shrugged, even though he knew Jack couldn’t see him. “Do you think the ectocam might be able to spot buried star pearls?”

#danny phantom #ectoberhaunt 2021 #ectober 2021 #ectober #ectoberhaunt treat #danny totally ignoring objectively horribly things #worldbuilding

508 notes · View notes

4joonkookie · 3 years

Text

Crush

❈ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader (x Yoongi)

❈ Words: 6.6K

❈ Summary: (Smutty) Boyfriend!Jungkook can sense you and Yoongi are horny for each other and let's you indulge.

(Angsty) After being quarantined together in domestic bliss for a few months, Jungkook asks you to stay for good.

(Smutty & Angsty) Jungkook asks you to move in permanently. You and Yoongi almost set the house on fire when Jungkook makes an offer you can't refuse.

❈ Warnings/Tags: Plot, There's Plot., Smut, Established Relationship, Angst, Morning Sex, Dirty Talk, Loud Sex, Thin Walls, Blurred Lines, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Unprotected Sex, Sexual Tension, Flirting, Face Sitting, Cumplay, Cum Spitting, Hair Pulling, Cum Eating, Doggy Style, Brief Ass-Licking, Arguing, Crying, Commitment Issues, Threesome, Female Character with Fuckboi Tendancies, JK has a lot of money, Quarantine, Writing is Hard, Cuckhold, Spitroast.

❈ Notes: -Can be read as Part 3 of the Mirror, Mirror Series or standalone:) -Takes place Summer 2020-ish.

You can feel his eyes on you before you even open yours.

Jungkook smiles next to you on the bed, head propped on his bent elbow. “I like this,” he says.

“Like what?” You yawn and stretch and coax yourself into staying awake.

“Everyday, when I wake up, you’re right here.” He brushes bed-head hair away from your face. “We should keep it like this.”

Rolling over on top of him, “You think so?”

“I know so,” he says, as you lean down to kiss him, morning breath and all. There was a time when neither of you would have ever allowed your mouths near each other before brushing.

It seems like some alternate universe now even though it was just 3 months ago. Drowning in work, living in hotel rooms and hoping you could sneak away for a weekend with your long-distance boyfriend, if your schedules would allow it.

Then the world came to a screeching halt. Your job had been cancelled indefinitely, you’ve hardly worn anything but hoodies and sweatpants for months and you’ve gone from a long-distance girlfriend to a live-in domestic partner.

You’d never thought you and Jungkook would end up this way. You integrated together effortlessly, as if it has always been this way. Any worries you had about meshing with the other members were unfounded too. You’ve never had friends so close. You’ve never had time for hobbies or doing things you actually like.

You never thought you would end up like this.

Straddling his hips, Jungkook rubs his hands on your naked skin. He slides his hardening cock between your unclad folds, still wet and open from the night before.

He continues thinking aloud. “You should stay here.” He pushes up, pressing his shaft on your clit. “We could start everyday like this.” He guides himself easily inside and you groan, still sensitive. “I’m serious. Don’t go back to work.” He slides in and out comfortably. “Stay here.”

“Jungkook, I can’t live here,” you scold, circling your hips a few times. You try to distract him and yourself, not telling him about the conversation with your work yesterday. You could be back as little as a week.

“But you do live here. He stops his motion and holds your hips still. “You just need to unpack your boxes.”

You’ve all but officially moved in yet your belongings remain in boxes. It would be easy to empty the boxes and put things in a permanent place. Also, equally as easy to tape the lids shut and ship them back to your old life.

You ignore his comment and brace your hands on the wall above the headboard, gaining traction to move your hips. He pulls your arms down and holds them to your sides.

“I've already talked to everyone.” Holding down harder, preventing you from moving.

“You did?” His words finally hold you still.

“Of course. They said it was silly I asked because you already live here. Everybody said they would love to keep having you here.”

He pulls you down to whisper: “Especially Yoongi.”

“Shut up.” You playfully slap his chest, embarrassed.

He is not wrong. You and Yoongi had become particularly close since being here. You have a lot of fun together, cooking, playing guitar, there’s a bit of tension there. It never goes beyond playful flirting but it’s been obvious for a while now. Jungkook is secure and is sure to openly poke fun at the both of you about it.

Jungkook laughs, moving his hips again. “You guys crush on each other so hard, it’s cute.” He continues whispering. “You know he can hear you?” He points to the wall above his head.

“No!” You whisper back in disbelief. Yoongi’s room is just on the other side of the wall.

“Yes, he told me. He can hear everything,” he still whispers but thrusts up into you harder, forcing a noise from you.

Jungkook is always one to tease but the way he keeps his voice at a whisper makes you know his words are true.

He continues his harsh thrusts as he whispers. “He’s probably still in bed right now, jerking his morning wood with his ear against the wall.”

“Jungkook, stop!” You continue to reprimand him but can’t prevent a grin at the idea.

“You love it.” He lifts your hips and drops you down hard. You try to stifle the moan it elicits. “You like the idea that he’s there right now with a good grip on himself, palming up and down to the sounds of your noisy moaning.”

“I am not noisy,” you defend yourself quietly.

“You are so noisy!”, he says loudly enough to travel through the walls.

The room finally quiets and Jungkook tries to keep his own breathing steady as your pelvises grind against each other. You close your eyes and let the fantasy swim in your mind. Yoongi, slipping his hand under the waistband of his pants, listening to you.

Jungkook continues to fuel the fantasy as your bodies set a rhythm. “He’s rubbing himself raw, wishing his spit and hand was as wet and slippery as this pretty pussy.”

Jungkook takes your prudish whimpers as a challenge and flips your body so you’re on all fours and places a grip around your hips that promises bruises. He sets a punishing, slapping pace. Probably echoing through the entire house, you bury your face in the pillows.

He pulls you up by your shoulders and holds you still as he pounds into you. “Come on baby, don’t you want him to get off?”

He continues his heavy pace and you surrender as the pressure builds at your core, cock slamming into your g spot, unable to stop the moans from escaping if you tried. Your legs shake when liquid begins to gush and drip down the inside of your thighs with every thrust.

Jungkook growls, happy with evidence of his skill and he comes to the sounds of your bodies slamming together.

You both collapse to the bed and catch your breath. You lay around just a little longer, taking each other in and reveling in your safe little world.

Eventually, you both roll out of bed, throw on clothes and head out into the kitchen.

“I would bet money Yoongi’s out there right now, in front of his laptop with a mug of coffee poured and ready for you.”

You roll your eyes and brush him off although you know he’s probably right. He stops you before you can turn the door handle.

“Hey.” He holds both your hands in his. “Think about it? Really? Before work tries to take you away from me again?”

You nod. “I love you.” There’s nothing truer and your job has done nothing for you other than keep you busy. Still, you try to prepare him and smooth it over.

“You know, if I go, it’ll only be like, half the time. We’ll still have way more time together than we did before, especially if you’re not touring,” you offer, persuading him.

He shakes his head. “No. I want you here. Not sometimes. All the time.” His gaze gets sad. “Unless that’s not what you want.”

You try to reassure him. “You know that’s not true.” He nods but you see the doubt in his eyes. “So is that an ultimatum? Stay here or nothing?”

“That’s not what I’m saying.” He wraps his arms around your waist.

“Then, what are you saying?” Wrapping arms around his neck.

He takes a deep breath in. “I’m saying… I know it’s not what we expected but I love this, it feels right. I don’t want to move backwards.”

“I’m scared, Jungkook.” It’s the only way to describe the doubt that lingers in your mind.

“I don't know why. But being scared is ok. Just please, please think about it. Before you make a decision.”

The words are stuck in your throat.

You can’t because it means it’s real. It’s not just circumstances, casual or reversible. It’s real.

“I love you.” He kisses both of your hands and follows behind you into the kitchen.

Yoongi sits at the kitchen island on his laptop, as Jungkook predicted. He pushes a mug of prepared coffee for without a word, a morning ritual.

Jungkook gives you a knowing look while Yoongi continues work on his computer.

“Thank You.” You take a seat around the island.

Standing next to you, Jungkook mockingly asks Yoongi: “Will you pour me a cup of coffee, hyung?”

Yoongi senses his jest, stands and turns to retrieve a carton of banana milk from the fridge. He pours it into a coffee mug and slides it to Jungkook over the counter. You do your best not to laugh.

Jungkook smirks, checked by his elder. He sips from the mug, his eyes moving from you and back to Yoongi. Yoongi catches his glance. He knows. He feels it. It feels like a million things are being said in silence. Yoongi picks up his own coffee mug to refill it from the pot, a chance to turn his back to Jungkook.

The tension makes you wonder if they’ve ever spoken about the “crush” before. Or, worse, this morning. You know the walls are thin so, sure, he can hear you. But you wonder if Jungkook exaggerated the rest to get you off. Is that why it’s awkward?

“Jungkook, please get the pork belly from the freezer.” Yoongi directs Jungkook with his back still turned, a silent directive to drop it.

‘Is this for the recipe you’re trying today?” Jungkook finally lets up and changes the subject, heading to the freezer.

“Yeah, a little later.” He closes his laptop and stands. “I have a meeting. Are you heading to the studio?”

“Yep. Back soon.” Jungkook kisses you on the cheek and they both head separate ways.

You finish a cup of coffee and lounge around alone for a few hours, the house quiet with everybody doing their own thing in the large house. You read a few chapters from a book recommended by Namjoon and manage to take a short nap.

You imagine this is what it would be like if you stayed here. The empty house is peaceful. At least, for a few hours. It’s no trouble being alone and keeping busy but you know it’ll be more like being in hiding.

Management has always viewed you as a threat and distraction to all the members. There was not much they could do about you staying the last few months. Jungkook has some leverage now and they have to work around his wishes. As the relationship progresses, the way they already minimize and diminish you will get worse. How far can it even go when it has to be a secret? Staying here means a life of full gag order and anonymity.

You attempt to distract yourself from generating a long list of reasons to decline Jungkook’s proposal by strumming a few chords on the guitar.

When Yoongi re-emerges to the common area, you acknowledge him but continue playing.

“You’re getting pretty good at that thing.” He sits next to you on the couch.

“Thanks.” You lay the guitar beside you as this better distraction presents itself.

“May I?” He holds his hands out to receive the guitar.

You pass it over and you watch and listen as he strums much more pleasantly and skillfully. Bare-faced, messy hair and wearing clothes just to lounge around in but he looks good.

“So.” He starts as he strums between chords. “Are you unpacking your boxes or will you live out of them forever?” He asks as casually as possible.

“How do you know?” You question, nearly holding your breath.

“Walls are pretty thin,” he says, even and casual, still strumming softly.

You try to contain the redness coming over your chest and face, all of the things he may have heard this morning, circling in your mind.

You shamefully try to come up with something quick. “I’m still figuring out the details with work.” You nod unconvincingly.

“Yeah?” He says, surprised. “Jungkook is really excited about it.”

“I mean, management will throw a fit but-“ he shrugs his shoulders. We’ll back you up. They have to get through all seven of us before they can get to you. ”

You feel a pang of guilt hit your gut.

He changes the subject, sensing he’s hit a nerve. “Anyway...”

You blurt the first thing to come to mind. “So, you can hear through the walls?”

“I hear enough,” placing the guitar at his side, He looks down and stifles a giggle.

You nervously bite down on your lip. “Jungkook says I'm loud.”

He nods and runs his hand over the back of his neck. “That’s true.”

You both take a moment to snickers before you apologize. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he says, sounding genuine.

“What else did you hear this morning?” You ask, curious.

“Not much.” He leans back on the couch with his legs spread. You try to ignore how inviting his lap looks. “Just you being loud. He offers a teasing smile. “And some things about unpacking your boxes and…,” he trails off. “How you have a crush on me,” he finishes, nonchalantly.

You give him a playful shove and he raises both arms to block, laughing.

You wonder what else he heard. You can see the details he’s left out in his face, trying to be safe with this boundary.

“Is that what I heard?” His voice lowers as he tries to confirm.

“Yes,” you respond. “But that’s not why I spend time with you. I just like doing those things with you, being around you.”

A smile washes over his face. “I enjoy doing those things with you too. They’re just sometimes more fun because I have a crush on you too.”

You don’t respond but look down as the mood changes. His eyes lay on you differently. He has a different kind of confidence about him hearing you say it. You do too, knowing you’ve both said it out loud and Jungkook said it before anyone else.

The tension sits too heavy in the air but you let curiosity get the best of you anyway.

“When did you get off last?” You ask with a stern eye on him.

He laughs, deflecting. “Oh, is this what crushes talk about?”

You keep your gaze steady, awaiting an answer.

He lets out a defeated sigh. “Jungkook told you. How embarrassing.”

“So, this morning?” you immediately probe, unable to help yourself.

“And last night,” he contributes, shifting in his seat.

It’s a relief Jungkook had the wherewithal to whisper all that filth this morning. Also, that nothing was a secret. Jungkook is so great in that way. Acknowledging what is without being threatened and getting his ego bruised.

“So, obviously, I don’t mind that you’re loud.” His smile fades a bit and his gaze gets dark. “It’s sexy.”

Your stomach sinks. There are so many questions you want to ask but you don’t. How long? How often? What do you think about? Who do you think about?

He continues. “You like knowing that.” It starts as a question and ends as a statement. His eyes scan your face and you observe his own restraint.

It’s getting too deep. You should stop before this conversation escalates any further. The house feels too empty and too many ideas race in your mind. He takes the action before you.

“Are you ready to cook?” He asks, nearly leaping off the couch.

You both head to the kitchen and the tension settles as you get caught up in conversation about nothing-too-serious. Yoongi perfects a sauce while you load rice into a steamer. He tastes the sauce with his thumb and has a bland, questioning reaction.

“Is it good?” You try to read his face.

“I don’t know, try it.” He adds some spices and whisks further, lifting to check the consistency. You watch one strong arm whisk the mixture while the other holds the bowl still. His lips are pursed, concentrated. The sight of his arms and lips start to make your body hot.

You’ve seen him hundreds of times in the past 3 years. You’ve seen him everyday for 3 months. Still, It’s like looking at him for the first time.

This is all Jungkook’s fault. He put the idea in your mind.

Really, he activated something that was always there. You don’t know how he does it. He’s good like that too, excavating every emotion you have, never letting one be covered up or denied. You’d never realized how often you’d done that. He’s made you better, even before living together.

Nevertheless, your now crush is evolving to an ache, a craving right in front of your eyes. Yoongi is unaffected, focused on perfecting his cuisine. He’s messy, stray sauce everywhere.

He approaches where you stand by the counter, bowl in hand and you can smell him. It nearly knocks you off your feet when it fills your nostrils. Stray sauce is streaked on his forearm. You grab a nearby kitchen towel to swipe at his arm when he gets close, keeping your hands busy. They have too many ideas.

Maybe laying your hands on him (regardless of what they were doing) transfers your horny energy but your hands linger on him now and the dynamic shifts. He has that look again, lips parted, a million dirty thoughts flash across his mind in seconds. A big metal bowl is the only thing separating your bodies.

His eyes dart down from yours, guiding your own eyes to his lips, intrigued. He takes a deep breath and leans in closer, nearly hovering over you. He uses his thumb to briefly flick across your bottom lip. All the indecency in his eyes directed at your mouth. He places the bowl on the counter next to him, closing space between you.

“Try it.” He reaches down beside him and coats his thumb in the liquid. He slides the palm side of his thumb between your lips. You let them graze over but resist the urge to wrap your mouth around him.

You run your tongue over your lips to taste. “It’s good,” hardly audible.

The slight gesture causes the intensity to surge so greatly that you both seem to repel from each other. Yoongi returns to the other side of the kitchen and you both continue your tasks in silence, adrenaline still rushing, making it impossible to have a conversation.

Right on cue, Jungkook enters the silent heavy room.

“Hey.” you both say in unison, not even looking up at him.

“Hey.” He says, already sensing the put-on tones and not buying it for a single second.

“What have you been up to today?” He pecks your lips but keeps his eyes on Yoongi.

“I took a nap,” you offer, weakly. He nods suspiciously. Yoongi still has his back to him.

“How’s your recipe coming?” he asks, shooting daggers into the back of Yoongi’s head.

“Sauce is done,” you say, wishing Yoongi would speak for himself.

“Ok, What’s going on?” Jungkook finally demands.

You and Yoongi answer in unison. “Nothing,” sounding rehearsed.

“No, it's something.” His expression becomes uncharacteristically worried. “I know you’re flirting but right now, I feel like I'm interrupting something. I don’t like that.”

“I’m sorry, Jungkook.” Yoongi cracks and turns around. “You’re right, it’s inappropriate.”

He raises his eyebrows, intrigued. “What’s inappropriate?” he digs.

Yoongi darts his eyes to you, mouth open but not speaking.

“What happened?” Jungkook’s voice gets louder.

You break next. “I ate sauce off his hand.” It comes out fast like one long word.

“Like, how?” looking puzzled.

“Like, off his thumb.” You extend your own thumb as if he doesn’t know what one is.

“When?”

“5 minutes ago.”

He slowly nods in comprehension. “So, you sucked on his finger. Then what?”

You fight the urge to correct him as you put such deliberate effort in NOT sucking. “Then, here we are.” You nervously tap your fingers on the countertop.

Jungkook is silent for a long time.

“Show me,” he announces.

“What?” Yoongi finally speaks again.

“Sounds harmless enough. Let me see.”

Yoongi pleads. “Jungkook, you don’t have to do this, it won’t happen again.”

“I'd feel better if I could see how ‘inappropriate’ it was.” Jungkook glares at Yoongi, wrestling to decide if he’s betrayed him or not.

There’s no getting out of it. You and Yoongi drag your feet to re-create your positions and he dips his thumb into the bowl just as before. You repeat the gesture, locking eyes with him for just a moment before his thumb touches your lips again.

Jungkook guffaws at the sight. “Did she do it like that?”.

“Yeah.” Yoongi shrugs his shoulders.

Jungkook redirects his gaze at you. “You? Did it like that?”

You narrow your eyes at Jungkook. “Yes.”

You can’t tell if you should be offended or honored by his shock at your weak cleaning of his thumb. You opt to keep quiet.

Yoongi looks thoroughly confused. Jungkook chortles and approaches you both by the bowl.

“She can do better than that.” He pulls Yoongi's wrist into the bowl, isolating his index finger. He coats Yoongi’s finger and pushes it against your lips.

You take his finger and instinctively pull him in, down to the webbing of his hand. Jungkook lets his wrist free and Yoongi takes the liberty to push in again with 2 fingers and you suck them in and let them fall out slowly. His throat lets out a low groan through parted lips.

“That’s better,” Jungkook croons.

Jungkook guides you a few steps away to the living room so only you can hear. “Is there anything else I need to know about?” He asks with a forbidding look.

You reassure him with a hand on his chest. “No, Jungkook.” He nods and kisses your lips.

“Do you want to do this?”

You’re not sure what “this” is but the way he strokes his fingers along your crotch gives you an idea.

“We’re going to talk for a few minutes,” he starts, quickly glancing at Yoongi. “Get in the bedroom.” He tugs back at your hair with force, making you gasp. “When we get in there, I want you in one of your slutty outfits, waiting on the bed.” He kisses you hard and sloppy on the mouth before releasing his grip. Yoongi's eyes are nearly bulging out of his face.

You head to the bedroom as calmly as possible. When the door closes behind you, you begin a frenzy, digging through boxes for any matching pieces of lingerie. You manage to find a set, freshen up and wait on the bed. It’s been almost a half hour, you wonder what they’re talking about.

Yoongi follows behind Jungkook and closes the door. “There she is.” Yoongi looks a little nervous. The 2 stand in front of the bed.

“Lips stay below the neck, no kissing on the lips,” Jungkook announces. You and Yoongi nod at each other, his boner appearing through his pants at the sight of you. “Can he cum on your chest?”

Yoongi glances down shyly at the question. You nod again, heart pounding.

“Anything else?” directed at you now. You shake your head, still unable to form words. Jungkook leans down where you sit on the bed to kiss you. “Relax,” he whispers before his lips peck yours.

Jungkook’s easy breakdown of “rules” and the fact they’d talked so much about this already gives you an inkling about their past.

You speak so only Jungkook can hear. “Something tells me this isn’t your first time.” You glance back at Yoongi.

“Smart girl.” He kisses you again. “But this is different. We’re not sharing. He turns you on and I like it when you’re turned on. So. Relax. I wanna turn you on and get you off.”

Jungkook removes his clothes before crawling behind you on the bed and runs his hands over your body, groping in front of Yoongi as he watches, standing by the bed.

“Look how pretty you are for us.” He pulls you head back for a kiss and slides his hand under the hem of your panties, letting a finger slip between your folds. Your knees buckle.

“Mmm, She’s so wet for you already, hyung.” He pushes the fabric away and slips fingers in and out of your wet opening. Yoongi instinctively rubs himself on the outside of his pants, watching as Jungkook pulls his hand away and brings his fingers to your mouth. You don’t let our eyes leave his before directing Yoongi.

“Come here.” You scoot to the edge of the bed.

Jungkook sits behind you, rubbing your back as Yoongi approaches.

Yoongi’s eyes roll back immediately when you grasp at the bulge through his sweatpants and stroke beneath the fabric. He takes off his shirt while you pull down at the waistband of his pants and watch his cock fall free. Pale shaft with a swollen pink tip. Perfectly placed veins, just like his arms. You wrap your lips around the tip and let saliva drip down his shaft. He places an encouraging palm on the back of your head as you slide your lips to the base and gag, bringing moans from Yoongi. You wrap your hand around his shaft and work it with your mouth.

“Wait.” Jungkook places a hand on your shoulder. The sight has him eager for a place to keep his dick wet while you service Yoongi. He guides you to bend in front of him. Pushing panties aside, Jungkook slides in with ease, arousal pooled at your opening. You continue on Yoongi, running your tongue on the underside of his balls and licking up to the tip. Jungkook gropes at your ass and thrusts softly, careful not to disturb Yoongi. Then sensation causes you to moan around his cock and Yoongi eggs your head off, breathing away an orgasm.

Jungkook takes this opportunity to fuck you at a normal pace. After some time, Yoongi palms himself, watching. You relish in being a fantasy come to life.

You’re sore, being railed by Jungkook this morning and the night before. But that doesn’t stop you or him. He unhooks your bra and lets it fall to the bed. He pulls you up so your body is flush in front of him and exposed to Yoongi, who increases the pace he has on himself.

Jungkook pulls out while still holding you close. Yoongi slows and closes his eyes, teetering on the edge again.

The wet sticky panties cling to you.

“Your panties are ruined baby.” Sucking kisses on the line of your neck while the cold panties cling to you. “Lay down so we can get them off.”

Jungkook guides you to your back as Yoongi stands at the side of the bed, pulling you to the edge so you’re spread in front of him. Your head lays in Jungkook’s lap, he still faces Yoongi.

Yoongi palms at your center, feeling the crevices over wet fabric. It’s sticky and uncomfortable and you just want them gone. Jungkook strokes your head in his lap. Yoongi holds his cock between your clothed folds, watching your face as you twitch around him. He pushes the tip at the opening, blocked by the fabric.

He continues letting his tip run up and down until he eventually grips at the crotch of the fabric and pulls it up and taut against your clit. He rhythmically lifts and releases, your pelvis rising a little bit with each pull. He continues faster and you’re now grateful for the sticky fabric that offers friction until he stops and let’s it slap back to your skin, just before you come. He’s edging you with your own underwear.

He finally pulls them down and around your ankles, playfully tossing them at Jungkook sitting behind you. He slithers his tip around your bare entrance, teasing your opening and sliding up. Squelching fills the air.

You’re eager to get him all the way inside, pushing your core down each time he’s at your opening. You whine when he pulls his cock away completely and moves to kiss at your bare breasts. He lets his teeth graze over your skin, sucking. Jungkook uses his foot to push at Yoongi’s shoulder.

“Don’t mark her,” he warns. Yoongi heeds his warning and opts to leave the area completely. He lines himself up and bottoms out inside, wetting his entire shaft with you.

You moan louder and Jungkook tugs at your nipples. Yoongi bottoms out with each thrust.

“Are you gonna come just like this, Noona?” Yoongi teases, between thrusts as if you weren’t being turned on and teased for the last hour.

“I’d rather come on your lips,” letting your finger flick across his mouth.”

A little shock flashes across his face before Jungkook laughs. “Mmm, I love a good slut that asks for what she wants.” He praises as he strokes your hair.

Jungkook makes room for Yoongi to lay back on the bed again.

“I like this “crush” thing,” Yoongi says as you hover over top of him and he attaches his lips to you straight away. His arms are hooked around your thighs as he sucks and flicks his tongue over your swollen clit. He lets out deep little moans underneath you, happy to have you squirming and whimpering above him. You rock your hips back and forth on his face and the vibrations from his voice bring you so close again.

Jungkook lines up flush behind you. “I told him how good you taste, baby. And I know he loves hearing your pretty voice.” He slips his fingers under your bum to push fingers into your opening. Yoongi moves his mouth up just slightly to make room for him and you still. He continues, “Come for us, baby,” kissing your neck.

Yoongi squeezes at your breasts and He holds you down tight on his face when you come.

You’re shuddering above him still when he instructs you to bend over, guiding you off of him. Jungkook moves to sit at the opposite end of the bed.

You present yourself to him and instantly fall to your elbows when he licks a long strip from your opening all the way up to your tailbone. Jungkook giggles at your reaction.

“Do it again.” Jungkook orders. Yoongi does, and you’re so sensitive that your thighs shake. He moves to your opening and laps at this new angle, insatiable. Just as you begin to lose yourself on his tongue again, he lines up behind you and slams you on his cock. He fills you in a different way, hands on your hips as he slides your body over himself again and again.

Jungkook doesn’t waste a moment before positioning himself so he can gag you on his cock while Yoongi thrusts mercilessly, both taking everything they want from you.

Jungkook pulls your hair back to see your face. “Such a good slut, stuffed full at both ends.”

Yoongi grunts at the words. “Fuck, I’m gonna come.” You’re suddenly empty as they fumble to change positions. Jungkook instructs you to turn over and sit up on the edge of the bed.

Yoongi stands in front of you and ribbons white on your chest, grunting through his orgasm.

Jungkook pushes your back to the bed and runs his flat tongue over your messied chest, collecting cum in his mouth. He grips your jaw from above you, signaling to open and you readily obey. He purses his lips and lets the liquid fall into your mouth, laps up more and repeats all while strokes himself.

When your chest is clean, He climbs over you so his thighs straddle your face.

“Mmmmm… show him who my sweet cumslut is.” He praises before he throws his head back and groans, stroking himself into your open mouth.

You hold your mouth open while he spills into you, swallowing and licking your lips. You hold out your clean tongue and he spits from high up once more for good measure. Yoongi sits in your peripheral vision on a nearby chair. Spent cock resting between his legs, hands laced behind his head, taking in the sight.

“Good Girl,” Jungkook whispers.

The three of you sit up straight when you hear the screaming.

“Yoongiiii!!” Seokjin’s voice wails through the thin walls.

Yoongi puts on pants and nearly flies to the kitchen. You and Jungkook quickly dress and follow behind.

You walk into Seokjin scolding Yoongi about a pot boiling over and scorching on the stove.

“You could’ve set the house on fire!”

“I… I’m sorry I got distracted.”

“Doing what?!.” Seokjin’s fury fades when he notices Yoongi is shirtless and the 3 of you have triple fucked-out looks.

“You know what? I don’t want to know,” he announces, as he scrubs the burner.

Yoongi and Seokjin finish cooking and everyone sits for the meal. You’ve done this many times now, sitting around a table talking for hours. Sometimes everyone is up all night and you reluctantly agree to go to sleep. Other times, members slowly trickle away and wake up to the same remaining people talking. Oftentimes, it was you and Yoongi.

The plates are nearly clear when Taehyung declares: “Noona, I emptied our part of the closet downstairs so you have room for your things.

You glare at Jungkook.

“Don’t look at me, I didn’t tell him to do that,” taking a final bite. Taehyung assumed.

“Actually, I’m going back to work,” blurting out, threatened by Taehyung’s (and everyone’s) assumption. “But, thank you.”

“You are?” Jungkook looks only half surprised.

“Yeah. I fly out to San Francisco next Thursday.”

Jungkook stands from the table and calmly walks to the bedroom. You politely excuse yourself and follow him. He’s not even looking at you yet but starts off before the door even shuts.

“So when I left this morning, you were thinking about it. You fuck my friend. Now, you’re leaving next week.”

You close your eyes and scoff. You can just imagine the six others just outside the door, darting eyes at each other, wondering which “friend”. It’s an unfair and irrelevant comment but you choose to ignore it, he has his own share of “unfair”.

“Jungkook, lower your voice.”

Ignoring you, “Did you even think about it?”

Blood heats under your skin. “Why think about it when everyone has just assumed? It’s like everyone gets a say but me.”

“And what’s your ‘say’?”

You pause before speaking, trying to calm yourself. “We both knew this arrangement was temporary. The way it was before was working for us.”

“It won’t work for me, not anymore.” “And this is not just an ‘arrangement’ anymore, you know that.”

“You know management does NOT want me around.”

“I don’t give a fuck WHAT they want. I’ve made it very clear that you’re not going anywhere. At least if it’s up to me.”

Your attempts to soothe yourself and convince Jungkook are failing. “So, what? I just hide out here, some house gremlin while you’re gone for weeks, months at a time? Having to be your dirty little secret? We can’t even be together in public.”

He glances down and gets closer to you. “That will be hard. I’m sorry. I wish I could change that.” His voice gets lower. “But when I’m gone…I mean, you’ve been cooking and writing and playing the guitar and you love that. You could do that. Or not. You could do whatever you want.” He stands firm. “If one of us is not bound by work, we’re officially together twice as much. Next?” He trudges forward, seeking to eliminate all of your ideas.

“I would have to move to a different country.”

“What about it? Tell me, where do you consider ‘home?’ and wherever you think that is, tell me why you chose to come here when you had to choose a place to be 3 months ago? The apartment is yours too. You could be here or there, whatever you want. What else can you come up with?”

You get sucked into his attempt to exhaust your excuses. “They offered me a raise to come back.” It sounds stupid coming out about half way through.

“Money?”, he laughs erratically, sounding unstable now. He pulls a billfold from his pants pocket and begins launching credit cards and different types of cash on the bed. “Here. Here. Here. And there’s more where that came from.”

“Ok, Jungkook,” you turn, agitated. He circles the bed to get face-to-face again.

“I’m just saying you have no excuse!” His voice gets somber and tears well in his eyes. The pain on his face makes you do the same. “So, why not then? Just tell me why. Because, when you’re here, the way you look at me, I know you feel the way I do. So why don’t you want to?”

You shake your head. “It’s not that I don’t want Jungkook. You just don’t know how things will turn out.”

He’s gripping your arms, trying to get his sense into you. “There is nothing that I'm worried about as long as you’re here. No matter what, it’s going to be fine.”

You coldly shake him off. “How do you know?!” You're yelling and crying now, really wanting to know where he gets his faith.

“I don’t know how anything will turn out, I just know that I want you there anyway!”

His face drops with realization.

His voice gets very quiet. “I guess that’s the difference between us.”

You’re too drained to argue that point. Maybe he’s right.

You make a final plea. “Please,” as you hiccup through sobs. “Can you just give me time to think about it? Instead of deciding for me?”

He pushes his forehead to yours. “I'm sorry I pressured you. I love you. It’s better when you’re here.” He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. “There is no ultimatum here.” His forehead wrinkles. “Sometimes, I think if it’s something you really wanted, you wouldn’t have to think about it. But if time is what you want, take it.

“Thank you.” You hold onto each other like you might just slip away. Your sudden comfort is quickly snatched when he finishes.

“But if you’re not staying, you should go now.”

He squeezes you tight and whispers. “I love you.” Before you can reciprocate, he leaves and disappears into another part of the house. You haphazardly pack a bag and exit the bedroom, wiping tears from your face.

Yoongi approaches you as you head for the door, Seokjin following just behind. The others have gone after Jungkook.

“Noona, I'm so sorry, I didn’t mean to…”

You try to reassure him right away, hugging him. “Hey...it’s not you. This…” You search for the words to describe the situation, no fault on Yoongi. “This has been a long time coming.”

“Why are you leaving so soon?”

“It hurts Jungkook that I'm here so I need to go.” It sounds silly coming out of your mouth. If you just stayed, he wouldn’t be hurt. And neither would you.

“Do you need a car?” Seokjin asks. You nod he is on the phone right away.

You continue with Yoongi, “Could you send my boxes? I’ll have an address in a few days.”

“Of course.” He hugs you again. “Why do I feel like I’m never going to see you again?”

You don’t tell him that it feels that way to you too. “Would you just make sure he’s ok, please?”

He nods and with that you leave, severing ties with that safe little world.

832 notes · View notes

bigskydreaming · 3 years

Note

Hi, I was reading your post about Jason punching Dick in the face when Dick revealed he fake his death was bullshit ( which it was) and it reminded me of an issue/question that has bothered me for sometime.

Why did people believe Dick was actually dead?

I’m not the most avid comic reader so maybe I missed something but it was always weird to me that everyone just accepted this especially given how Bruce was acting or should I say wasn’t acting.

This is a man when his child died another child had to come along and told him sir you are being too violent and emotional you need supervision. When his other child died he went all over the universe to bring him back to life because he knew it was possible ( which was happening at the same time), so why didn’t anyone think it was weird he wasn’t doing that for Dick. Can you imagine Dick really dying that soon after Damian it would be injustice Batman Version. You are telling me that Tim, Jason or Barbara didn’t think it was weird that Bruce didn’t also bring Dick’s corpse to the bring Damian back to life mission or mention it to themselves. Like what more likely Dick dead and Bruce is handling it well or that he fake his death to do something stupid and Dangerous after his partner/brother/ little bit my son the feelings are complicated died after he was knocked out and woke up to his corpse.

Oh man, this is like, the entire nature of my beef?

(Slight derail just to emphasize the fact real quick that Dick DID actually die, he was just revived quickly, but like, the trauma of his death was very real and its not like anyone was clued into Luthor having a resurrection backdoor built into his literal murder of Dick in the actual moment of it happening. So Dick’s death wasn’t fake, and additionally, he didn’t have anything to do with like, telling people about it, because he was literally comatose in the cave and recovering while Bruce was telling people....by the time Dick woke up in the cave, we already know that Alfred at least had already been convinced by Bruce that Dick was dead, so I have a kneejerk need to pushback against the Dick faked his death narrative by reminding people wherever possible that Dick had no agency in the spreading of that narrative.

It happened without him being involved, and the only actual contribution he ever made to it was just not revealing he was alive before Grayson #12, after Bruce like.....emotionally, mentally and physically badgered him into accepting that doing so would be directly harmful to his family and he didn’t want to be the reason more people died when like, people had just died because he ‘let’ himself be captured and interrogated by Power Woman’s Lasso of Submission, did he?

SORRY TO BE PEDANTIC, just wanted to start this off on a clarification, even though I know the aim of your ask was very much in tune with the rest of my response. A lot of people don’t read the actual comics, so like, I’m never gonna skip over an opportunity to emphasize that the shorthand people use to refer to Dick’s death and the year he was with Spyral, is like, literally just shorthand for describing it. Its not actually an accurate description of how all that went down and who had the most hand in it).

BUT ANYWAY. BACK TO THE MEAT OF THE BEEF.

Okay so like, not only was the entire family and Bruce himself giving Dick shit for his death and Spyral, like, PAINFULLY egregious because it was literal victim blaming in every possible sense of the word....

None of it made a LICK of sense with ANY of their characterizations, and they ONLY all accepted it on face value because the Plot Demanded It, and when you're like, no, as a reader I say The Plot Demanded It is not a good enough reason for me to be like well sure, that makes sense......looking at the characters ACTUAL actions at face value pretty much just makes them all look like assholes?

Like, Tim has never gracefully accepted anyone's death. Ever. This is core characterization for him. He will go to the ends of the earth for his loved ones and to bring them back, prove they're not dead, refuse to let death be the final verdict for them. He was tempted to use the Lazarus Pit to bring his parents back to life. He refused to accept Bruce was dead long before he had any proof whatsoever of that theory. He tried to clone his BFF/future-husband Kon in his fucking basement like, dude was two whole inches away from going Full Dark Side in his quest to bring back a lost loved one no matter WHAT the cost.....and then you've got Dick unmasked onscreen, killed offscreen, and Bruce then reporting to the rest of them with zero inflection 'oh Dick's dead now. Its very sad' and Tim's just like, sure. Sounds legit.

I mean?!?!

And you're SO RIGHT ABOUT THE DAMIAN THING! Bruce LITERALLY LITERALLY LITERALLY went BEYOND the ends of the Earth, like, he full on chartered a fucking space ship to fly his whole family out to APOKOLIPS to bring Damian back from the dead by going to EXTREME lengths.....WHILE everyone else thought Dick was dead....

And not a single person looked at Bruce and was like, okay, not that we're not down to do this for Damian because we miss Stabby Smurf something fierce ourselves, but.....what the fuck is UP with you dude? Why aren't you displaying ANY hint of this same kind of energy in regards to your eldest son that you said you watched die right in front of you?

Like....I don't know that we were actually ever told that Dick's coffin was empty or had a fake in it, but like....this family of detectives who refuse to accept death, defy death, COME BACK FROM THE DEAD....not a single one of them said like, okay, if I'm gonna like, ACCEPT accept that Dick is dead and gone for good, I need to at least just see him one last time? That's literally all it would have taken for someone to realize hey something's a little wonky here. Where's the dead body, Pops?

Since when has Jason ever missed an opportunity to prove Bruce is a) full of shit, b) acting like an emotionless robot and all his kids deserve better especially when they've just like....died, c) just factually incorrect and wrong and jumped to a conclusion before it was conclusively proved, d) lying like a liar or e) all of the above?

Nobody even ASKED if Dick's body could be put in a Lazarus Pit? Yeah, Jason wouldn't necessarily recommend it himself, given what it put him through, but actually fuck that, I take that back, because I'm NOT actually of the opinion that Jason full on hates his life and actively spends every second of every day wishing he hadn't been resurrected, even if it had come with a huge buffet of additional trauma and pain.

And that's kinda what's implied when people just take it for granted that he would never be on board with any scenario involving using a Lazarus Pit to bring Dick back, because it suggests that based even just on his own experiences and feelings, he honestly believes Dick would prefer being dead and not have ANY further opportunities to be with his loved ones, his friends, help save the damn world again at some future point.....that Jason, projecting based just off himself, legit feels Dick would rather be dead than have another shot at life even WITH the downsides of Lazarus Pit usage? Nope. Sorry, I don't buy it.

Speaking of not buying it.....you know what was missing from all those soliloquies the others monologued at Dick about how they felt and were hurt and just devastated by his death, to such a point they can't seem to muster a single shred of happiness that he's NOT dead still -

(seriously, Damian was the ONLY person in ALL THE LANDS OF EMOTION-HAVING who expressed ANY kind of positive reaction to having Dick back. We were so fucking cheated of like.....ANY opportunity to have the characters show just how much they valued him by just being fucking HAPPY he was alive, no matter what else was involved....and then most of fandom compounded that by for years being like mmmm, no, Dick didn't get yelled at enough by his family for what HE put THEM through. Needs more yelling. More punching too. Bad Dick. Bad. This is the only way you'll learn not to die and get shipped off on a mission that you don't want but at least is to protect your family after being beaten into it by your dad whilst victim blaming you for dying in the first place. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN TO THINK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE AND THEIR FEELINGS FOR A CHANGE, DICK?!?)

- But like, BUT I DIGRESS aside....you know what was missing from all those monologues about how hard DICK'S death and ensuing year of basically exile from his loved ones was for EVERYONE BUT HIM?

We never got a single line of explanation as to what everyone else officially thinks even happened to him in the first place?

Like, did Bruce straight up just say oh bad news kids, your brother umm. Expired. Spontaneously. There's no one to blame, he just keeled over, its all very sad.

Is that how that went down?

You're telling me that the explanation of Dick's death didn't come with a single pointed finger at someone for this family of blame-happy vigilantes to like, BLAME for the loss of this brother they all mourned oh so much, they just couldn't help but blame him for all the hurt it caused them?

The family that in every other fic is like OBSESSED with avenging and being avenged and all things vengeful and even tangentially vengeance-y....like didn't ask for a single detail on whomst the fuck deprived us of our brother-having?

Where were the attempts on Luthor's life by Jason (who I mean, yeah I know it was in a previous continuity, but erasing that timeline doesn't erase my awareness of the time Dick killed Jason's murderer so like.....mmm, just saying, woulda been nice)....where was the rage directed at the Crime Syndicate and references to how seriously and personally the Batfam took making sure that they were PUNISHED for all this and would never be free to wreak havoc on their world or their family again? What did they tell Damian when he came back to life, and how are you going to tell me that this fraternal little ball of fury didn't aim himself like a cannonball at whomever the fuck had DARED take HIS Batman from him when Damian wasn't around to have his back?

Not only does everyone else's desire to be avenged start falling really flat the second you factor in hey maybe Dick feels "mmm what about MY avenging" sometimes, and why doesn't anyone ever care about doing that for him.....but also, y'know what REALLY sucks about the ONLY person we actually SEE being blamed for Dick's death and ensuing absence being like....Dick himself?

Not only were his family all super keen on making all of this HIS fault and HIM the bad guy because of how it made them all feeeeeeel (and meanwhile fuck his feelings, am I right Batfam hfaklshfklahfkla).....

They somehow found a way to justify prioritizing this OVER ever even getting around to blaming some villain for his death in the FIRST place, in the entire year or so they thought he was still dead!

Like, you couldn't come up with a single target in all that time, but Dick's back two seconds, and you don't even give him a chance to EXPLAIN before you're punching him, shutting him down with 'I expected better from you' and turning away with 'I don't want to hear it, why am I surprised Dick Grayson disappointed me again'?

afshklfhalfhalfhla

Make it make sense!

And like, it won't, cuz it doesn't, and it never will, and like I said at the top, the ONLY reason it all played out this way is because DC doesn't give a fuck about character development and deemed it necessary to go down this way for the sake of the plot (which was totes worth it, I mean, glad we sacrificed characters for this A+ plot which was clearly the greatest plot of all time and definitely justified every story choice made or not made around it loooool).

BUT.

BUT BUT BUT.

The problem isn't JUST that DC is stupid, even though that is an eternal mood and quite the problem.

Its that the SECOND large parts of fandom decided to play along with DC and just accept the story at face value, only add to it and play into it exactly as it happened in canon with no significant deviations, and like, heaping on the LITERAL abuse from Dick's siblings while ignoring the LITERAL abuse from his father....

THAT....is when all of this becomes relevant.

Because the second people decided TO engage with the reasoning DC gave for what Bruce did and how and what Dick did and how and just not mess with any of that and have it all play out exactly like that...

The second people are like, okay we're FINE with not just dismissing this story as OOC writing that doesn't make any sense, and actually VALIDATING it to various degrees by engaging with it as is....

That's when 'OOC writing' stops being an excuse or explanation for alllll of the above gaps in character logic and actions.

Because its like, when you had abundant chance to REJECT this story and say nope, this was bullshit from start to finish and I'm not here for it, when you were just as capable of transforming literally ANY aspect of this story you didn't like into something that made more sense to you....

And you chose not to.

That's.....accepting it as valid writing. You were like, okay, I'm game to just treat this as a thing that happened, just like they said that happened.

For the chance to give Dick shit for it, see. For the angst, see.

And that's when I'm like okay cool, so when engaging with this story as is and accepting it on face value and just delving into the characters as they were SHOWN interacting with and around these events......for the angst or whatever....

You guys just all decided en masse to just hop, skip and jump over allllllllll the opportunities for angst inherent in examining even ANY SINGLE ONE of the above lapses in judgment or hypocrisy on the parts of the characters (who don't get to be excused by OOC writing if you're not going to call the story an example of OOC writing, whoops).

And its just like, uh, what's up with that?

#lol thank you for this ask tho #I havent gone on a good Spyral rant in months #it does wonders for my pores

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desiredmalfoy · 3 years

Text

Love Lost (D.M. x Reader)

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Reader

Universe: No Voldy but still pain in this story.

Genre: Angst! And more Angst!

Word Count: 1.3k

Summary: The reader feels like she’s losing Draco to Astoria. Does he still love her? Will he fix it?

Warning: Some bad words? Not too many.

{Draco Masterlist} { Main Masterlist }

(Credit to the gif owner)

I was in a mood for angst today lol. After having writers block for so long I finally came up with this. Hopefully I can finish my wips, ships and requests soon! Let me know if you want a part 2

You usually didn’t have a problem with any of Draco’s friends. Sure, some of them could be real idiots but for the most part they were nice to you. But you had recently ran into a problem, and her name was Astoria Greengrass. She was Daphne’s little sister who painfully obviously had a crush on your boyfriend. You hated seeming like an over jealous girlfriend, so you didn’t know how to truly react to this.

He had begun to spend more time with her after she had practically begged him for help in potions. She had come up to him in the common room when you were studying and pleaded with him for help. Her eyes seemed to sparkle when he finally agreed.

He seemed reluctant at first but ultimately agreed. He had said to you, “I’m only helping her so that she doesn’t tell her parents I refused. Last thing I need is my parents' comments.”

It had started innocent, he would help her twice a week in the library. As the weeks progressed, they were hanging out more and more often. He would finish quidditch practice and then meet her in the common room. Telling you that he would see you later but later never came.

He had even forgotten one of your dates. He apologized profusely and promised to make it up to you. He didn’t, he forgot too.

One date became two and then you lost count. You were tired of being disappointed.

You had walked into the common room after spending the evening studying with Pansy. All your friends had gotten together to study for an upcoming potions exam. All except Draco who didn’t show up. After walking in, that’s when you saw the two of them sitting in a corner table of the common room. You felt your stomach drop. Your mouth began to dry up and it felt sticky. You didn’t know how to react.

“What an arse”, Pansy mumbled to you. She reached for your hand to give it as squeeze. Letting you know she’s there for you. She had heard you complain all the time, she knew the pain you felt. And she was over seeing you getting walked over.

“Oh looks who’s here (y/n)! We finally found him!” Pansy exclaimed dramatically. This caused the two of them to break from their world and turn to the two of you.

“What do you mean Parkinson?” Draco asked, breaking the silence in the room. The air felt stifling. Astoria only looked up at you and Pansy, not making a comment.

“We were all meant to study together.” Pansy answered bluntly. “Did you forget that too Malfoy?”

“What the bloody hell do you mean?”

“You seem to forget everything as of late” You got the courage to speak up suddenly, beating Pansy. You glanced over at her as she gave you an encouraging look.“ I mean you always seem to forget our dates.”

The lump in your throat grew more and more by the second.

“Babe I-”

“I’m getting quite tired. It’s been a long steady session. I’ll see you all tomorrow.” You interrupted him, stopping him before he spoke. You had enough of this and the last thing you needed was for them to see you cry.

You let go of Pansy's hand and adjusted the strap of your bag. You made your way towards your dorm, trying to get out of there as fast as possible.

You walked into your dorm, slamming it shut. You threw your book bag across the room. Letting out some of the anger you felt. You grabbed a pillow from your bed and threw it at the door. You threw yourself onto your bed, frustrated beyond belief. The door opened and revealed the last person you wanted to see.

“What are we exactly”, you asked bluntly as he walked into your dorm. Draco looked at you confused as he looked towards you.

“What do you even mean?”

“I mean I don’t feel like your girlfriend anymore.” You rolled your eyes at his lack of comprehension. “You barely want to be around me it seems. I haven’t seen you in days Draco but you know who has? Astoria.”

“Don’t be bloody ridiculous (y/n). She’s my friend and nothing more. You’re overreacting.” It was his turn to roll his eyes at you.

You stood up suddenly and went to stand face to face with you. “Really? A friend is someone who’s super touchy with you? Someone who openly flirts with you?”

“She’s my friend! You’re just jealous!” His face was becoming redder with anger.

“You’re so draft Draco!” You threw your hands up in anger. Your voice rising slightly in pitch as you kept on getting angrier. “Everyone can see it! Hell, even Crabbe asked me if I was even still your girlfriend. You know how bloody obvious it has to be for that git to see it?”

“You know you wouldn’t like it if it was another guy treating me the way Astoria is with you.”

“She doesn’t like me!” He yelled, frustrated at the situation and at himself. Because it was finally dawning on him what a horrible boyfriend he had been these past few weeks. “And it doesn’t matter if she did because I don’t like her! Please understand that (y/n)!”

“Yes it does! Because you don’t set any boundaries and let her do whatever. You let her think you’re interested. And not one time do you stop & think about me.”

“You have forgotten our dates! You literally left me all alone waiting for you in the astronomy tower because you never showed.” You continued your rant and Draco stayed silent at your outburst. He stared at you with wide eyes and shock. He had never seen you like this.

“Did you know I’m not doing the best on potions anymore? I’m struggling and you don’t seem to care Draco. But sure, as long as Astoria is passing it’s okay I guess.” You were crying at this point as you continued you’re rant. Tears freely flowing from your cheeks. You hated crying, you hated seeming weak.

Draco attempted to wipe the tears from your cheeks but you moved away. Not wanting him to touch you right now. You let out a deep breath, voice quivering. “I don’t know how much more I can handle. My heart can’t take much more.”

“What do you mean darling? I love you. Please (y/n), I love you so much. I never wanted to hurt you.”

“I think you’re a little too late for that.”

“Please. Please think about this. I’m so sorry.” He was now starting to cry himself, something that was rare for him. He didn’t just cry for anyone. But his tears didn’t take away the hurt he had caused.

“You’ve broken my trust. You’ve hurt me. It’s going to take more than saying I’m sorry to let this all go.”

“I’ll do anything love.”

“You have to see where your heart lies. If you do actually love me, you’ll have to gain my trust back Draco.”

“Babe…” he grabbed your cheeks titling your head to look at him in the eyes. Both your eyes shining from the tears. “I’ll do that and so much more.”

“For the sake of our relationship, I hope you mean it. But I think I need some time to myself tonight and maybe tomorrow too.” You grabbed his hands, taking them away from your face. You gave them a slight squeeze before letting them go. Hoping that this wouldn’t be the last time you held them.

He left without saying another word. As you watched him walk out of your dorm, you dropped to the floor. Letting all the emotions of the past weeks flowing out. All the hurt, all the sadness and all the angry flowing down your cheeks.

Thoughts? Part 2??

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