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nicksnosering · 3 months

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I Hate Myself For Loving You Pt. 3

PT 1 PT 2

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The night air was cool and biting against the wetness trailing down my inner thighs, and I marveled in the freedom I felt from such an uncharacteristically bold move I’d made.

My phone buzzed in my purse, and I let it ring out three times before finally picking up on the fourth call.

I didn’t get the chance to say hello before I heard him yelling in my ear.

“What the fuck? You’re actually fucking kidding me. My brother? You’re disgusting. You’re actually the most despicable human being alive—“

He kept going for another few minutes until I heard the sound of him breathing angrily into the phone, signaling he was done.

“Alright, Chris. I’ll level with you. Yeah, maybe me hooking up with your brother wasn’t exactly the nicest thing I could’ve done, but you and I both know you’re not stupid enough to be confused about why I did it.”

My heels clicked against the sidewalk as I walked, punctuating my sentence for me. I’d never felt so liberated, so free, so—

“I hope it was worth it considering I’m never going to touch you again.”

My heart fell to my stomach.

Of course I’d wanted to make him mad. I’d wanted to see him seething, undeniably jealous and unable to hold back from admitting it any longer. He loved me the way I loved him, I know he did. Does.

With the alcohol still coursing through my system, my mouth opened before my brain could catch up, my words coming out far bolder than they’d usually be.

“I’d never want you to touch me again.”

He scoffed. “I’ll level with you,” he sneered, throwing my words back in my face. “Your slutty little ass can’t stay away for longer than a day, maybe two if you’re feeling especially bitchy right now. I need you to listen to me, because I’m only saying this once. I’m not coming back this time. When you call me crying because you realize how badly you fucked up, I can promise you I won’t pick up. So you better pray to God it was worth it, because I am not going to fuck you. Ever. Again.”

A laugh bubbled up out of my throat, my head swimming slightly as his words only really half sunk in. My eyes rolled and I shook my head as a grin crept its way onto my face.

“See you soon, Chris.”

——————

Once I was inside my front door, I kicked off my heels and headed straight for bed, not bothering to get out of my dress or take off my makeup. Tonight was exhausting, and I could already feel the headache starting to come on, signaling a raging hangover in the morning.

I’d almost been asleep when my phone started buzzing again. My heart lurched, shocked that he’d given up so quickly and was already reaching back out.

Except it wasn’t him.

“Hello?” I said, my eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

“Hey,” Matt breathed out. “I just wanted to make sure you got home okay. I couldn’t find you anywhere when I went back downstairs, so I assume you and your friends must’ve left.”

I smiled softly and warmth spread throughout my body. “Yeah, I’m home. Thank you for checking, that’s really sweet of you. Did you make it back okay?”

“Yeah, walking through my front door now. I’m sorry again about Chris, he’s not usually that…”

“Intense?” I supplied.

“We’ll go with that. Anyway, I just wanted to call and check in on you. I also wanted to say that I had a great time tonight, and I’d love to see you again if you’re up for it.”

The gears in my mind started turning, still feeling half-tipsy and fully spiteful. “Actually, I’m off work tomorrow, and I’ll probably be up for a few more hours anyway. You’re welcome to come over and continue the party here.”

“Oh,” he said, an air of surprise to his tone. “Um, yeah. That sounds good. Text me your address?”

“See you soon.”

I sent over the details and swiftly threw off the covers, climbing out of bed and heading straight for the bathroom. My reflection was rough. There was eyeliner smudged in rings around my eyes, and my hair looked like it hadn’t been brushed in days.

When I heard the first knock at the door, I’d managed to wash my face and get my hair under control, swapping my dress for some sweatpants and a tank top in an effort to look sexily indifferent.

I swing the door open to reveal Matt, still dressed in the same clothes he was in at the party. I suppress a grin at the thought of him rushing out of the door after our phone call and step aside to let him in.

“Hey,” he says, a soft smile on his face as he steps through the threshold into my apartment.

“Hey,” I respond.

He follows me into the kitchen, and I pull a bottle of cheap vodka out of the fridge, setting it on the counter as I look for two shot glasses. “Feel like keeping up the buzz?” I call over my shoulder.

“Oh, always.”

I pour us two shots and we both slam them quickly, shivering as the rubbing alcohol taste sets in. “Sorry, I only buy the cheap shit.”

“All good,” he smiles, stacking our empty shot glasses and leaning forward on the countertop. “This is a nice place.”

I glance around at my cheap one-bedroom apartment, taking in the chipping paint on the walls and the out of date shag carpet that’s peeling up at the corners of the living room. I turn back to him with a raised eyebrow. “No it’s not. This place is a shithole.”

He laughs loudly, raising his shoulders in apology. “Sorry, just trying to break the ice and make conversation. It was the first thing that came to mind.”

“Real smooth,” I tease, circling the countertop and coming to stand next to him. “Who says we need conversation?”

He takes my not-so-subtle hint, wrapping his arms around my waist and giving me a gentle smile before leaning in and softly capturing my lips with his own.

Matt could not be more different from his brother. Chris is all rough grabs and harsh teeth and aiming to get to his end goal, whereas Matt is more soft touches and gentle kisses and putting your needs before his own.

I can’t help but wonder if there’s a way to meet in the middle.

His tongue lightly traces over my neck, placing a soft kiss just below my ear before sucking gently, like he’s scared to leave a mark. My fingers come up to wind into his hair, pulling gently and reveling in the low moan he produces before sucking a little harder.

I inhale sharply when he leans back and blows, the cool air sending a rush of goosebumps down my spine. His hand starts slipping lower on my body, finding the waistband of my sweats and pushing inside. His fingers swirl over the crotch of my panties, and he pushes them aside to rub lightly over my clit, the sensation sparking all of my nerve ending and causing me to arch forward into his touch.

“Fuck, Matt,” I whisper as I dip my head and rest it against his shoulder, gripping his bicep to ensure his arm stays in place. He takes it a sign to speed up, fingers brushing exactly where they need to, and I let out a small whine, wrapping my arm around the back of his neck and entangling my hand in the soft hairs there.

“You sound so pretty, baby,” he whispers back, and he slips forward and sinks two fingers into me quickly, pumping them in and out at a slow pace, fingers crooking in the perfect spot with every thrust.

I can hear myself panting and moaning loudly as he works, and I look up and make eye contact, taken completely aback by his features.

There’s a soft smile on his face and a caring light in his eyes, and he just looks so… soft. Like he gives a fuck how I’m feeling. If this is good for me. It’s overwhelming and devastating all at once, and I can’t stop myself from thinking that this must be how Chris would look if he let down his guard and was fully open with me.

My heart twinges painfully in my chest, and I feel slightly guilty for still comparing the two when I should be solely focused on Matt, but these past five months of emotional torture that Chris has been putting me through are embedded in my brain. I can’t seem to separate the two of them no matter how hard I try.

Another precise curl of his fingers causing me to come soaring back to reality, and I lean in to kiss him again, needing to feel his emotions rather than seeing them. The kiss is sloppy, breaking apart each time I pant or moan again, and he moves to place small kisses on my cheek, on my eyelid, on my forehead.

Just as I feel like I’m about to burst into tears from the sheer kindness of his actions, he pulls out and grabs the back of my thighs, picking me up and placing another small kiss on my lips. “Bedroom?” he asks.

“Through the living room, to the right.”

He caries me through my apartment, pushing open the door with his knee and walking inside before laying me gently on the bed. His hands slide down to the waistband of my sweats again, and he hooks two fingers inside, glancing up at me for confirmation. I nod gently and he slides them off my body along with my underwear before climbing onto the bed with me. He hovers over me and reaches up to remove my shirt, leaving me bare and exposed in front of him.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers, running his hands along my body in a way that’s far from sexual. It’s like he’s trying to take it all in, trying to memorize every curve and dip and the softness of my skin. Like he’s praising me. Worshipping me.

I can’t take it any longer, and I yank his shirt over his head and reach down to tear open the button on his jeans, but his hands come down to stop me. I look up in question, and he laughs a little. “Slow down, sweetheart. We don’t need to rush through this, I want to take my time.”

The air leaves my body at his words, watching in a daze as he slides his pants and boxers off in one fluid motion. He leans back over me, head ducking down and tongue flicking out lightly over my nipple. I shiver and moan slightly as he slides his way down to between my thighs, and immediately sets to work lapping at my clit. His fingers come back up to slide into me and my hand flies down to his hair, gripping it tightly as I arch my back off the bed.

“God, yes. That feels so good,” I whine, digging my heels into the bed and scooting forward, trying to push him further inside me. His fingers begin to scissor slightly, and I feel my legs start to shake, so close to the edge but refusing to let myself fall over it yet. “Matt, please. Please, I need you inside me.”

His head pops up and a grin overtakes his face at my begging, but his fingers continue to work inside of me, twisting and arching and making me fall apart beneath him. He pulls them out and rubs slow, lazy circles over my core, watching me intensely. “You sure?”

“Yes, fuck. Please, Matt,” I say, moving my hand to his shoulder and trying to pull him up. He stays rooted where he is and gives me a wink, maintaining eye contact as he leans down and licks a flat stripe over me again.

It’s almost too much, and I let out a mix of a whine and a whimper, trying to pull back. His hands hook under my thighs, pulling me closer and keeping me firmly where I am. He blows again, the rush of air breezing over my clit and I feel my stomach muscles tense. “Matt,” I whine again.

“Okay, okay.” He relents, pulling himself up to settle over me. I feel his tip pressing against my entrance and he leans down, placing another kiss on my forehead before pushing in slowly. I gasp at the feeling, wrapping my legs tightly around his waist and arching up to try to take him in more. “Slow, baby. I want you to feel it all.”

I can’t even form words at this point, utterly wrecked under him from the anticipation. I feel each slow, excruciating inch push in until he’s settled at the hilt, and he pulls back out just as slow before sliding back in. I’ve never been treated so tenderly, and I feel simultaneously too cold and too hot with the way his gaze trails over my face, searching for any sign of discomfort.

“That’s it,” he murmurs, continuing his gentle pace. “Just like that.”

I finally give in, relaxing my entire body and simply allowing myself to feel. His head drops down to nestle against my neck, switching between light sucking and simply pressing his lips there, and I hear my phone buzz on my nightstand. He doesn’t pay it any mind, and I reach over to find Chris’s contact name lighting it up.

I knew he’d give in.

I ignore the text and opt for calling him instead, discarding my phone back on my nightstand as it rings. I watch the screen go black, signaling he picked up, and wrap my arms around Matt’s neck.

“Fuck, Matt. You feel so good,” I moan.

“You sound so pretty, baby. Keep saying my name,” he responds, picking up speed with his thrusts.

My body arches up into his and I pull his hair slightly, making him groan and dig his fingers into my hips. “Harder, Matt, please,” I choke out, turning to suck a spot onto his neck. The thought of him going home and Chris seeing it fuels me along with his noises, and he starts to pound into me mercilessly.

I’m holding on by a thread, and I can feel his legs shaking, a clear signal that he is too. “Cum for me, Matt,” I moan, and we both unravel together, my high-pitched whining turning into a near scream as he mumbles sweet words into my ear.

“Fuck, yes. God, I could stay here forever,” he says, nipping at my earlobe as we both come down. “Your body is so perfect. You’re so beautiful.”

I lean up and press our lips together, sealing his words into my mouth. We lay intertwined, sweaty and panting, and he rubs light circles over my back as his other hand runs its fingers through my hair. I’ve never felt so content after sex, and it’s a feeling I could quickly get used to.

I lean over to check my phone screen and see the call has ended, as well as six new text messages having come in. I flip it over and cuddle back into Matt, placing light kisses on his torso as we start to drift into sleep together.

Chris can wait.

#chris sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo x reader #christopher sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo

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miyagihawk · 3 years

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why’d you only call me when you’re high? pt. 2 | eli “hawk” moskowitz x reader

part one

here’s part 2 by popular demand! based off the arctic monkeys song and amazing request by @deadbeatharlz <3 thank you guys for the support on part 1 im so happy you liked it :)

warnings: self harming behavior, LOTS of swearing, alcohol and drug abuse, sooo so angstyyyy buckle up

summary: it’s been 3 months since your last night with hawk, and you haven’t been yourself.

word count: 3,062

The past 3 months have been rough. Maybe the worst you’ve ever been. You fell into the deep hole that you dug yourself. The hole of loving Hawk Moskowitz.

You never thought you’d be one of those people who let unrequited love devastate their whole being. In fact you always thought the whole heartbreak thing was pathetic and melodramatic. Until it happened to you.

You hate yourself for letting him have this effect on you. But there’s a pestering voice in the back of your mind that reminds you: it’s all your fault. He didn’t ask you to love him. It’s just easier to blame him for your downfall.

Parties, drugs, alcohol. Sex with people you don’t even know. High on the same drug that compelled him to call you in the night.

You’ve become so desperate to forget him that you ruined yourself. It hurts your pride to be the whiny heartbroken girl who let a stupid boy’s rejection shatter her self worth. But the hole is too deep and there’s no hope trying to grasp onto the dirt walls to get out.

The worst part of it is that he sees it all. At school, (if you even go) he looks at you like the scum of the earth as he passes by with his little karate gang. When you end up at the same party, he’ll have a disgusted expression on his face and leave as if he can’t bare to look at you.

Tonight is one of those nights, and you watch him from across the backyard as he goofs around with his friends. He hasn’t noticed you yet, hence why he’s even still here and not on his way out the door to get away from you.

“If you stare at him any longer, I think he’ll shoot up into flames,” your best friend Robby hands you a cup, and you don’t hesitate before downing its unknown contents. The burn in your throat makes you hum with content.

“That’s the plan,” you take your eyes of off Hawk to look at Robby. You gesture to his own cup in his hand, “Are you gonna drink that?”

“Easy there, Y/N. We got here 5 minutes ago,” he warns, but holds out the drink towards you anyway. Robby’s always been worried about you and your habits, but he knows how you can be when you’re told no.

You swallow down the drink in a few seconds, ignoring his remark. “5 minutes? I can beat my record!” you cheer sarcastically, and start walking to the kitchen in search of a keg. Robby follows closely behind you, a wary look on his face.

The fuzzy feeling starts to take over your body as you throw back drink after drink. It’s the buzz you crave every second of every day because it just makes you feel so good. Everything is happier and your cares feel so far away. Hawk feels so far away.

You sit on the couch next to Robby in your dazed trance, drunkenly rambling to him about random things. He glares at anyone who comes near you and looks like they would take advantage of you in your state.

Robby really hates you like this, but he can’t help but feel protective over you. He’s not even a fan of parties; he really only goes to keep an eye on you. You’re grateful even though you act like you hate it when he babysits you.

“Heyyy pretty Y/N! Want some?” Yasmine approaches where you sit, a joint held between her fingers. Her eyes are drooped and she sways as she stands.

You reach out to take the blunt, but you feel Robby push your arm down. “You’re already drunk. That’s enough,” he says sternly, making you roll your eyes.

“I can do what I want, Dad,” you taunt, and take the joint from Yasmine. Smoke fills up your lungs, immediately giving you pleasure. Robby just shakes his head in disapproval as the air around him becomes hazy.

“I’m going to the bathroom. Stay here,” he orders, getting up from the couch.

You nod, but of course, you don’t listen. The sound of splashing from outside sets off a lightbulb above your head and you feel like you’re floating while you walk to the backyard.

Right as you step out of the house, you make eye contact with none other than Hawk. He gives you a distasteful look like always, before turning back to his group. Asshole.

You just scoff and stumble towards the pool, where a couple is making out and a few people are drunkenly playing with the water like little kids.

Reaching the edge of the pool’s rim, you let yourself fall in with a splash. You feel the pressure in your ears start to build as you sink to the bottom. Maybe it’s the fact that you’re cross faded, but being underwater feels like a world of bliss.

The loud music of the party is muted, creating a sense of serenity. The legs of the other people in the pool make you laugh to yourself, sending bubbles from your mouth to the surface. It’s glittery and pretty and you want to stay forever.

You don’t know how long you’re under there for, but you don’t notice your lungs running out of air. It just feels good to be alone for a second. Next thing you know, you feel your eyes start to droop closed; a strange peace overcoming your body.

A loud thrashing noise in the water makes you wake up with a gasp. You swallow too much water as you feel someone grab hold of your arm. It’s all a blur and you’re being pulled up to the surface, taking you away from the tranquil world you were just in.

The music is pounds against your ears again and the air is cold on your skin. You feel your body being laid down on the concrete of the poolside, but everything feels numb. You just feel sleepy and you want to close your eyes again.

“Y/N, hey, wake up. Wake up,” a voice makes your eyes shoot back open. Someone is looking down at you, with a hand shaking your shoulder. Your vision is somewhat blurry, but the mohawk gives it away. It’s him.

You suddenly become aware of the large amount of water in your lungs and you turn over to your side to cough it up. After you get it all out, you notice the people at the party looking at you with eyes of pity mixed with judgement.

“What the fuck were you doing? You could’ve died, are you fucking stupid?” Hawk curses, but even in your inebriated state you can hear a hint of worry in his voice.

You sit up to face him. He looks angry; his clothes and hair are as wet as yours.

Maybe it’s the lack of oxygen in your brain, or maybe it’s the marijuana and alcohol, but you just feel the urge to laugh. So you do. Like a complete maniac. The way he probably just saved your life like he cares is sickly comedic to you.

His face twists in confusion as you break out into a fit of giggles. “Are you serious? You’re fucking insane, Y/N,” he gets up, shaking his head at you. He gives a glare to the people staring, and they look away in fear.

You think he’s going to leave like usual, but he surprises you by grabbing your arm to pull you up. People whisper amongst themselves as he drags you through the backyard, going through a gate that leads to front of the house. You trip over your own feet, still feeling dizzy from almost drowning, but he just pulls you along.

“What are you doing?” you ask, tugging on your arm to try and release it from the tight grip he has on you. You’re both dripping chlorinated water, leaving a track of drops on the concrete below.

“You’re going home Y/N,” he says sternly. You two arrive at his car and he opens the passenger door. “Get in.”

“Hey!” a voice yells from the house and you both turn to see Robby rushing towards the car. He looks pissed, and now you remember him telling you to stay put. Shit.

“Robby I-”

“Don’t get in there with him Y/N,” he says, sending a death stare to the boy next to you.

“I’m taking her home, Keene, so back the fuck off. Get in Y/N,” Hawk snaps, clenching his fists.

You keep quiet, not wanting to add to the fire already starting. They loathe each other; if not because of the karate rivalry, then because of you. To Robby, Hawk broke your heart and made you spiral. To Hawk, Robby is the piece of shit who he thinks is your boyfriend, and he won’t admit it but he’s jealous.

“You’re not driving her, asshole. You’re probably as drunk as her,” Robby reaches to take your arm, but Hawk pulls you back.

“You don’t know shit about me, Keene. I’ve been sober for three months, so yeah, I will drive her,” Hawk picks you up like you’re a doll, placing you in the passenger seat and closing the door. You don’t resist, you just feel tired and your head starts to pound as if the mix of drugs in your system are punishing you. The window’s down, so you can still hear the two boys loud and clear.

I’ve been sober for three months, his voice echoes in your head.

“Oh so now you care so much about her? It’s your fault she’s like this!” Robby raises his voice even more, starting to move towards Hawk threateningly. You begin to feel scared that a physical fight might actually break out, but you don’t know what to do.

“I’m not the one who almost let her die a few minutes ago, am I? Just fuck off, we’re leaving,” Hawk dismisses him, walking around the car to the driver’s seat. You’re surprised by his self control to not throw a punch, especially with his reputation.

“Robby, it’s okay. I just want to go home. I’ll call you, alright?” you reach your hand out of the window in reassurance and he takes hold of it. Hawk clenches his jaw as he turns on the engine.

“Promise you’ll be careful? I’m sorry I left you,” Robby furrows his eyebrows in worry. When he came out of the bathroom, someone filled him in on what happened to you and he almost had a heart attack.

“Promise. And it’s my fault,” you hook your pinky with his, before the car pulls out of the curb and separates you from your best friend. He watches you guys drive away, an anxious expression etched on his face.

The whole situation has sobered you up pretty well, and now you’re left with a throbbing headache, wet clothes, and awkward tension. You hate it. Being sober. You miss the foggy feeling that prevents you from thinking too hard about things. But now you’re inches away from the boy who broke your heart, all by choice.

You don’t know why you agreed to go with him, but did you even have a choice? You’re confused by his actions. He acts like he hates you but he jumps in a pool for you. He yelled at you but he’s driving you home. It all makes you overthink and it causes your head to ache even more.

You hold your head in your hands to try and ease the pain as Hawk drives quietly.

“You good?” he breaks the silence. His voice is softer compared to how he talked to Robby minutes ago.

“Head hurts,” you mumble.

“What were you doing back there? If I didn’t get you out, you’d probably be in the hospital right now,” he says. You peek at him through your hands and his eyes are on the road.

“I don’t know,” you sigh. “It was just peaceful. I didn’t really even think about breathing.”

He scoffs. “Well that’s just fucking stupid. You’re lucky I noticed you were under for so long.”

“Well thanks,” you reply quietly, feeling like a little kid being scolded.

There’s a couple beats of silence before he speaks, “What happened to you?”

The question makes you sit up and look over at him. “What are you talking about?”

“The old Y/N wouldn’t even touch a drink. You’re different,” Hawk taps his finger on the wheel in thought. His icy blue eyes quickly glance at your confused look before returning to the road.

“You happened, Hawk.” You pinch your temples in frustration. Anger starts to bubble up in your stomach at his criticism. At the mention of “old you”.

“I didn’t do this to you,” he shakes his head, as if trying to convince himself of his own words.

“You did,” you raise your voice, making him flinch. “You know it.”

“What, because I stopped sleeping with you? I didn’t make you fall in love with me, Y/N. You did that to yourself,” he spits, sending a knife to your heart and making you see red.

“You knew I loved you way before I said it. But you still stringed me along, didn’t you? You knew I would pick up everytime you called. You knew that I would let you into my bed because I was the girl who loved you no matter how fucking shitty you were!” you fire back, vomiting out words that you’ve wanted to say for months. The alcohol in your system makes you bolder than usual, but you’re grateful for it.

He’s at a loss for words at your outburst so you continue, “I didn’t ask for this Hawk. Loving you. I’m sorry that I’m such a burden and that you hate me so much that you can’t stand being in the same room as me. But please just answer me this and I’ll leave you alone forever. I’ll leave when we show up at the same party and I’ll even hide in the halls so you don’t have to see my face.”

You pause, choking on your words. You didn’t even realize that the car is already parked in front of your house and your clothes are halfway dry.

“Why don’t you love me?” your voice cracks as you spit out the question that has caused you to throw yourself away. The question with an answer that could dissipate your self worth in a mere moment.

Hawk finally looks into your glassy eyes with shock. He could’ve never anticipated what you asked him and his mouth runs dry.

“I told you, I- I don’t deserve someone like you loving me,” he swallows, but you shake your head.

“That’s not what I asked.”

He blinks slowly, trying to come up with an excuse. Any excuse, to avoid telling you the truth. You can see the inner conflict on his face, the panicked speed of his running thoughts.

“You should go home, Y/N,” he deflects, turning away from you. Putting on his mask to keep you from reading him like a book.

“I’m not going until you tell me,” you demand.

“Just get out of the car, fuck!” Hawk yells, slamming his hands down on the steering wheel. It makes you jump a little, but you’re too angry to fear the flames in his eyes.

“Why can’t you just tell me!” you fire back. “You came to me almost every night, so why do I feel something that you don’t? Is it me? Is there something wrong with me?”

“What do you want me to fucking say Y/N! That I do love you? Fucking fine. I love you. Is that what you wanted to hear? Just get out.”

I love you.

The same words you said that made him leave.

“You don’t even mean that,” you blink back your tears.

His voice is softer now, more gentle. “If I didn’t mean it then I wouldn’t have said it.”

“You said you needed me and then you left me,” your voice shakes and you hate how pathetic you sound.

“I-I didn’t leave you,” he stammers before taking a deep breath. “I left because you wanted something more than I could give you. I would’ve felt like a selfish asshole if we became more than just sex, Y/N. You deserve someone like Keene and yeah he’s a pussy but he’s good. Better than me.”

It feels like every piece in the puzzle is being put together. Everything makes sense. He does love you, but he was just afraid. He can’t be near you because it hurts too much to see someone he can’t have. Somehow, you can’t find the anger you’ve held against him for these past months; you just understand him now.

“I’m sorry, alright? For everything. For treating your feelings like shit. All of it.”

You swallow, thinking about his words. It all feels too much and the truth is now looking you in the eye, demanding an answer. You love him, but he dropped your heart on the floor for you to pick up every shard. Is one sorry going to magically fix everything?

“I- I don’t know what to say,” you admit, and he nods in understanding.

“You don’t have to say anything. Let’s just... move on. And you get better... I hate seeing you like this,” Hawk scans your red eyes and dilated pupils. “We’ll get to a better place and you and me, we’ll be good.”

It’s bittersweet, but he’s right. Being together now just because he loves you back would be a huge jump that would only end in broken hearts and toxic cycles. It would be foolish. As much as you want him, the only person who can fix you is yourself.

So it’s a meet up at the top of the mountain, when you’ve both made the journey from opposite sides.

“A better place,” you reiterate, before placing a light kiss to his cheek and leaving the car with a new sense of closure.

a/n: that was longer than i planned and a freaking roller coaster!!!!!!! im not sure if there should be a part 3? lmk what you think maybe it’ll just be short. but hehe i added robby into the mix he was so cute. ty for reading!

taglist for people who wanted part 2 :) ty friends for the support <3 @littlered6307 @deadbeatharlz @spiderman-berries @axastasiasstuff @r0-xie @estupidteen @hawkwhore @idkwhatishouldput4

#eli moskowitz #hawk cobra kai #cobra kai #cobra kai imagine #cobra kai x reader #eli moskowitz imagine #eli moskowitz x reader #hawk imagine #hawk x reader #cobrakai #hawk moskowitz

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mintmatcha · 4 years

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reupload because tumblr decided my readmore link on the original shouldn’t work anymore!!!!

Late Night Chat

MattsunxReader

CW: mentions of depression, established relationship, angst/fluff (happy ending)

You know Mattsun’s awake before he even speaks. The way he’s lying- face up, hands neatly folded in his stomach- is so strangely stiff compared to usual, it makes your skin crawl with worry. It’s cold without Issei wrapped around you, without his soft steady breathing, without his nose buried into your hair. You can hear the soft sound of fingernail against skin and, even with sheets and night shrouding him, you can tell he’s picking at his hang nails again. Your eyes dart to check the clock. 3:14. Has he slept at all?

“Can I talk to you about something? It’s important.” the shake in his voice, the unfamiliar tremor that immediately shakes off the cobwebs of sleep, tells you he can’t wait until morning. You turn, admiring how the ambient light peeking through your blinds from the street below catches his profile. His brows are knitted together, lip is caught between his teeth. Maybe it’s a trick of the light, something about the soft orange glow, but he seems older now, almost worn.

This is unfamiliar territory. Mattsun is always so nonchalant with his feelings, so dismissive about any sort of concern. It was rare to see him upset about anything; in fact, you could count the number of times he was anything other than pleasant on one hand. If you noticed a distant look and heavy sigh, Mattsun would consistently dismiss your concerns with a peck and a hollow laugh. The laugh. It made your brain buzz with worry whenever he pulled it out. It was high and tinny, obviously practiced. He was a bad liar, you knew something was weighing him down from the droop of his shoulder, from the scabs on his nail beds, but it seemed wrong to press further. Every time you did, he would retreat further from you, reinforcing his facade, hiding behind a wall impossible to break.

“Of course, Issei.” you murmur, somehow feeling if you raised your voice louder than a whisper, you would break the spell.

“I just.. Sometimes.” His eyes shift to meet yours, then dart back to the ceiling, like he was caught breaking some unspoken rule. “Ah, geez, can you turn around, maybe? I can’t say it when you’re looking at me.”

Your own anxiety is building, fears that you can’t quite form into tangible thoughts squirming around in your head, but you oblige, turning face the wall. He shifts as well, mirroring you. Pressing his back against you, he loops a leg between yours, tangling himself. You turn your head slightly, catching only the outline of his shoulder against the darkness.

“Hey, no peeking.” With every breath he presses farther into your back, searching for the comfort of your presence. Silence weighs heavy between you and, for a second, you fear that the moment has passed- that Mattsun has retreated back into his shell. “I just wanted to let you know…”

He breathes out slowly as he pulls the blanket closer to him.

“Sometimes, I get sad.” he’s almost swallowing his words, trying his hardest not to be heard, face pressed against the pillow. The soft picking sound of his nails against skin grows faster as he continues. “Like, really sad. So sad my body aches ‘nd my brain feels numb.. And there’s no reason to feel like that, but I do.”

You resist the urge to turn over, instead just tilting your head back into the space between his shoulder blades. He only hums at the contact before continuing.

“It’s just hard.” he continues. His voice is so unusually delicate, teetering on the brink of breaking. “Because sometimes I- I- god, it sounds so stupid,” he hisses out ‘stupid’ like it’s a curse. “but I get so tired. I can’t even bother to do basic shit some days. It’s pathetic.

“ They said the meds would help, and they do mostly, but sometimes it still feels like there’s this- this- blanket over my head, weighing me down and I just wanna lay down and sleep. But, I’m trying not to be like that, for you, ‘cause-."

“Can I look at you now?”

Mattsun snaps his jaw shut so hard that the sound makes you jump. “Fuck. Not yet, I just-” Silence lulls over him before he draws in a shaking breath. Mattsun rolls over carefully, enveloping you in his long limbs. One arm drapes over your chest limply, as if he’s afraid to hold any tighter. You lift your head instinctively to let him prop his arm underneath, but instead his fingers find your hair. He twirls a loose strand between his fingers, inspecting the way it moves with almost too much curiosity. He’s distracting himself, you decide. Even though he’s next to you again, the comforting feeling of warmth against your skin back, he feels so far away. “I just wanna say a little more. I can’t say it if you’re looking at me.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re going to look disappointed.” he breathes, “And that’s gonna hurt me.”

Instinctively, you begin to move again, but the way Mattsun recoils, fingers flexing, shoulders bunching, reminds you of the boundaries. “Issei, why would I ever be-?”

“Because…” he grumbles, trying to gather his words, “I’m going to keep talking and you’re going to realise you’re too good for me. That I’m not as good as you think I am.

His hand flexes into a fist, resting under the soft dip of your breast, with a heavy sigh. “I just wanted to let you know now.” he says finally. “Before you, like, plan a future with me or something.”

“Issei, don’t say that.” you whisper, placing a hand over his. He tenses for a moment, before pulling you into him, tucking his knees into the backs of yours.

“I’m sorry.” he says to the hair in between his fingers as he continues his ministrations.

“Issei.” strain your neck to see him, searching his surprisingly flat expression for…. Something. Anything. "Can I please turn around now?”

Mattsun answers by relaxing his grip, giving you the freedom to roll into his chest and clutch at the fabric of his shirt. For a split second, you’re acutely aware of how he smells- the lavender body wash you had bought him to replace the 3-in-1 he used to love, the dryer sheets that he always uses too many of, and, underneath it all, the scent of him. Breathing deep, you nestle further into him. Despite how composed he managed to keep himself, his heart betrays him; you can feel the way his heartbeat tattooed across his skin even through his clothing. You open to speak, but words fail you.

Instead, you tug on his shirt and in the dim, you can see his eyes widen ever so slightly as he comes to you. With only the tilt of your head, your lips meet, only slightly off the mark from each other. The kiss is sloppy, disjointed and desperate, barely clinging on to each other. His breath, hot against your face, hitches as he swipes his tongue against your own and you can’t ignore how he tastes like cinnamon and salt. The kiss says nothing, but everything you couldn’t all at once. The kiss dissolves, along with some of the tension in the air, but he doesn’t pull away, instead resting his nose against your cheek bone.

“I’ve already planned a future with you.” you say after a beat, blindly reaching up to wipe his cheeks, the moisture there surprising you. A finger brushes too close to his eye and he flinches with a broken laugh. “And nothings going to change that.”

Mattsun just nods. He audibly swallows before letting out an airy laugh, cracked slightly from his tears. “Fuck, this is why I asked you to turn around. I didn’t want you to know.”

“Hey, now, don’t cry. I’m here.” he tightens his grip around you, crushing you into his chest. Whether the shake of his limbs is from effort or emotion, you can’t tell.

“I was worried.” he admits, “Fuck, I was so, so worried you’d, you’d-”

His lips find yourself this time. It’s deeper, searching for an intimacy neither of you can vocalize. “I’m right here.” you whisper into him. “I know I can’t take it all away from you Issei, but I hope I can at least make it a little better.”

“You always do.” he presses a kiss against your brow. “You always do.”

#mattsun #matsukawa x y/n #matsukawa issei #mattsun x reader #mattsun x you #depression #haikyuu fic #haikyuu #seijoh #cryings #mattsun fic #mint's musings

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mizunetzu · 4 years

Note

Can you do a scenario where reader (male pronouns) kind of outs himself as bi and then hides for a while since it was an accident and he wasn't actually ready and after some time bakugo finds him and they end up awkwardly confessing to each other? Bonus points if you can do ComfortingTM class 1A (also I just really want bi representation 🥺)

BRO BRO ur reblogs and replies always make me BAM BAM

(Also y’all ik that gif is huge but it had denki AND baku in it and i felt compelled to use it bc kamis kinda important in the story NSNDNEKWK)

——————

Bakugou x reader - How to Out Your Classmate

⚠️warnings - being outed by your classmate (denki) (I’m sorry denki stans), bakugou kinda bulling kami at the end kdnfjekfj

Pronouns - male, he/him

——————

It was something he didn’t mean to say.

Rather, it just slipped out.

————

“Ne, (L/n)-kun, don’t you think Yao-momos hair is kinda sexy today? Her hair down plus that hair clip is FIRE dude!”

Kaminari slung a arm around (Y/n’s) shoulder, while Mineta smugly grinned from his seat. He wiped away a line of drool dripping from his mouth.

“Oh oh oh, her hair falls over her boobs so perfectly! I just wanna touch them at least once, ehuheuheu...”

Sero sighed from his seat. “Dude. You really are a scumbag. Stop that.”

Mineta, not missing a beat, turned to Sero with a shit-eating grin. “Oh? Why’s that? Are you gay or something?”

(Y/n) visibly stiffened from under Kaminari’s grasp. Kaminari however, didn’t notice and played along into Mineta’s joke.

“Yeah dude, kinda sus. Don’t go perving on me in the locker rooms now, haha!”

Sero sighed once more, this time with a playful smile. “Shut up, your probably more sus than I am-“

He was cut off when (Y/n) started wriggling out from under Kaminari’s arm. The three looked at (Y/n) quizzically, while (Y/n) awkwardly coughed. “I’m...leaving.”

“Why? What happened?” Kaminari leaned on the back of Seros desk.

“Well-you guys are...loud and I’m going to my desk.” Even the dumbest person could tell how tense (Y/n) was. Though, Kaminari was as dumb as he was oblivious. He scoffed, but it sounded more like a chuckle.

“What? I don’t get it, man. We were teasing Sero, not you.” Kaminari’s teasing tone felt like heaters blasting full power through (Y/n’s) body. It was strange. You always felt kind of hot when you get a little flustered. “So what part of what we said bothered you?”

“N-nothing!” (Y/n) cursed at the way he raised his voice, cursing even more at his small stutter.

“Then why are you panties in such a twist? I’m just making fun of Sero bein’ sus.”

“W-well how fun! Move, class is starting.” Truth be told, class didn’t start until 10 minutes later. When (Y/n) tried to subtly push past Kaminari, he grabbed him by the arms and blocked his way out. “No way I’m moving! You’re mad for some reason, and I just wanna know why!”

“So what exactly did we do?”

Sero rested his chin on his palm. “Yeah if you can tell us we can stop doing it, (L/n)-kun. I gotta agree with Kami on this one.”

An irk mark appeared as (Y/n’s) face flushed a darker shade of pink. Not in the good way though. He struggled helplessly in Kaminari’s stronghold, before tching and looking away.

“There’s nothing more to say-! You’re just-starting to get on my nerves and I wanna leave-!”

“Really? That’s it?” Kaminari looked at (Y/n) skeptically, before his face lit up. “Oh wait!”

“You started getting all pissy when we were talking about Yaoyorozu...and you also got mad the other day when she was talking about Bakugou...”

Shit. Shit. Shit.

“..So you like Yao-“

“I don’t fucking like Yaoyorozu!”

Now Kaminari was starting to get antsy. “Then what! Why are you mad! Is it because Mineta and I were ‘perving’?!”

“I’m not fuckin’ mad about you drooling over Yao-momos boobs! I’m not mad at all!”

Students started to gather once Kaminari and (Y/n) started to raise their voices higher and higher. Kaminari’s grip on (Y/n) was long gone, though (Y/n) was too upset to notice.

“If you weren’t mad about that, you were obviously mad about that time Yao-Momo talking about how Bakugou was attractive. So what? Do you like Bakugou or something? Are you gay?”

(Y/n) paled and grit his teeth. He was full on yelling now. “Stop saying that, damnit! I don’t like boys! Y-you know that!”

Kaminari gasped comically. “Oh my god! You totally avoided my question, dude!”

“What?!”

“Yeah! Now I get it! That’s what’s bothering you so much! It all makes sense!”

Kaminari’s mad expression morphed into one that you make when you solve a difficult question. It felt like all the blood in (y/n’s) face was drained, yet all the blood rushing to his cheeks burned like fire. Sero stood up from his chair and placed a hand on Kaminari’s shoulder. “Dude, uh-I think that’s enou-“

“Your confused because you’re straight but now you’ve started to like a guy, right?! Bakugou, right?!”

Seros warning went over Kaminari’s head completely. (Y/n) dug his nails into his palm while Kaminari pried into (Y/n’s) mind with his eyes.

“I’m not confused! I’m pissed. Very, very pissed at you!”

The blond haired boy slammed his arms down on Seros table and leaned in uncomfortably close. (Y/n) wanted to step back, but if he did, he’d run straight into Sero.

“Ok. If you answer this compleeeetely honestly, I’ll let you go. Swear! And we’ll never talk about this again! Just say yes or no! Nothing else!”

Sero glanced around the room. Everyone was staring, some had their hands over their mouths, and some were whispering and asking what was going on. Sero nervously tugged on the fabric of (Y/n’s) blazer. “U-um...yo... (y/n)...Kamin-“

“Do you like Bakugou?”

“I-“

“And don’t say you don’t like boys or you’re not gay, we ‘know’ that!”

“I’m-“

“Just say yes or no!”

“N-“

“Are you ga-“

“I’M BI!” (Y/n’s) sudden outburst silenced the classroom. It was like a blow from a king to shut up the commoners. “I’M BI, SO SHUT UP! ARE YOU HAPPY?! I’M NOT GAY AND I DON’T LIKE BAKUGOU! I DONT! I-I DONT. I don’t. I...”

Stagnant air flooded the 1-A classroom. Almost immediately, (Y/n) slapped both his hands over his mouth, eyes blown wide. Kaminari awkwardly chuckled. “Uh...”

(Y/n) took a tentative step back, bumping straight into Sero. He reflexively grabbed onto (y/n’s) forearms, stabling him.

“Are you oka-“

“Don’t touch me!” (Y/n) pushed off of Seros body and stumbled over a desk. He crashed onto the ground and fumbled onto his bottom. Students upon students neared towards him, all their face and voice blending together into one big, muddy pile. Their voices eventually turned into ringing, louder and louder until-

“SHUT UP!” (Y/n) rose to his wobbly legs, half running and half crawling towards the door as fast as he could. He could hear the protestant shouts of his classmates, or even the sleepily confused expression of his teacher as as flew by him in the hallway.

He guessed he was skipping class that day.

————

40 missed calls from: Mina-San domoo-!!

125 unopened texts from: Mina-San domoo-!!

23 missed calls from: Kamiii ⚡️

45 unopened texts from: Kamiii ⚡️

12 unopened texts from: Iida Tenya.

5 unopened texts from: ura-chaaaan 💖

1 unopened text from: Bakugou

(Y/n) turned off his phone. He knew if he kept it on, Mina would keep spamming his phone with text messages.

It’s been about a few days since his whole freak out happened. He’d bolt out of class the second it was dismissed, and he kept himself either locked in his room, or out of the dorms as much as humanly possible. He wasn’t ready to have that conversation yet.

His phone buzzed again. He sighed, half expecting it to be another spam text from Mina. What he didn’t expect, was to see Bakugous contact photo on his screen, with the big green words “Incoming call-Bakugou” blaring at him so intimidatingly.

Something made him want to answer.

He pressed the phone to his ear.

“Oi.”

Bakugous gruff voice sent chills down the boys spine. His voice seemed to lock itself inside his throat, refusing to come out his mouth.

“Say something, dumbass.” Oh boy, was he trying. Everytime he opened his mouth, his throat closed up and refused to open again. Bakugou sighed harshly through the speaker.

“Stop being stupid and avoiding us-“ (Y/n) absentmindedly pressed the red “end” button. If Kaminari or Kirishima or whatever convinced Bakugou, to convince HIM to stop avoiding them, just because he ‘liked’ him, (and he totally did), he’d rather not hear it.

(Y/n) went to crumple up a piece of paper he was scribbling on, and drop it into the trash can, when it bounced on top and rolled away pathetically near his feet. His trash can was overflowing. Well, it was expected, since he was deliberately missing out on trash days just so he didn’t have to leave his dorm. (Y/n) swiped up the piece of paper, along with the trash bag lining the bin.

A few seconds outside couldn’t hurt. No one will see him. He’ll just...throw the bag in the dumpster, and slink back in before anyone knows he’s there.

————

(Y/n) hauled the trash bag into the dumpster, throwing it from out over his shoulder. He dusted off his hands and wiped forming sweat off his brow. The trash was out, no one saw him, all he had to do was slip back in his room before anyone sees him.

He huffed and turned around, immediately being smacked by a spiky tuft of blond hair. All the color drained from (Y/n’s) face. Bakugou turned his head and spat onto the dirt, clicking his tongue in the process.

“Figured you’d be here.”

”...there’s no way you could’ve-“

“It takes about a couple days for a small trash can to fill up. And knowing you, shit-for-brains, would come and take it out when no one was really watching. 5 pm, when everyone’s getting ready for dinner. You really do have shit-for-brains, shittyass.”

Bakugou may seem like a meathead, but the times he showed he was observant and intelligent made his heart tie knots around itself. (Y/n) bit back a stutter and a blush.

“W...ell, how-how’d you know I was going to take it out today? A-and to this dumpster, instead of the one on the other side of the dorms?”

Bakugou scoffed loudly, stalking closer to him. (Y/n) gulped. “This ones closer to your dorm room, even I know that, loser.”

Bakugous voice dipped, suddenly becoming uncharacteristically quiet. “...and I’ve been coming here everyday at 5 pm...shittyass...”

Bakugou was really dedicated to his scheme, huh. Just so he could see him? (Y/n)? He should be the LAST person Bakugou would want to see. Especially with what Kaminari was blabbering about. Still...It made (Y/n) feel a bit special.

But knowing Bakugou, he was just probably here to tell him how disgusting he was. Maybe he’ll start calling him ‘dick-for-brains’ instead of ‘shit for brains’. Or just plain on ‘fag’.

“Oi-stop spacing out and fucking listen to me! And don’t you dare run away until you hear me the fuck out!”

Bakugous palms flashed white, generating small blasts and he pointed an agitated finger at (Y/n). He stepped back reflexively.

“Um...well...what did you want then?” (Y/n) awkwardly fumbled with his hands behind his back, trying to keep still as much as he could. He wanted to disappear.

“Is it true?”

(Y/n) looked up. Bakugou was staring dead on, with his hands shoved stiffly in his pockets and sporting the faintest blush on his face. It was so unnoticeable, you could blink and miss it. That, and the trademark scowl, you could hardly tell if his face was red because of anger or something else.

“What is?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, fuckass! Do you like me or not?!”

(Y/n) opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Bakugou grunted and stepped closer. “Answer me!”

“S-so what if I do-?! You gonna call me a fag?!” (Y/n) was sweating bullets. He hoped Bakugou wouldn’t see how utterly nervous he was. Fake it til you make it. Though, he doesn’t know what he’d do once Bakugou goes flames blazin’ on his ass. He could all ready see his reaction-

Bakugou smirked. “Knew it.”

Knew it? (Y/n’s) nerves temporarily fizzled down, a wave of confusion washing over him. “...What?”

“God, do you need me to spell everything out for you? It was obvious. To me at least. Everyone was probably too fuckin’ dumb to notice.”

(Y/n) fell silent. He could speak if he wanted to, his throat wasn’t closing up, but he chose to keep silent. It’s not like he knew what to say, anyways. He was stunned into submission.

“-so I was right. Now, go out with me, Bitch.”

“Thanks. But I’ll pass.”

“I-“ Bakugou made a sputtering noise. (Y/n) wasn’t sure if he was caught off guard or sputtered out of sheer anger. “What?! Why the fuck not?!”

“Dude, how do I know you aren’t like, I dunno, being bribed by Kaminari or something to try and ‘prove that I’m bi’? Or that your just mocking me?”

“Idiot! Why the fuck would you think I’d listen to a dumbass like dunce face?! I fucking like you, you like me, I don’t see the problem here!”

(Y/n) knew he wasn’t lying. Bakugou was many things, a shithead, a piece of angry trash, but he wasn’t a liar. Still, he sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Dude, as much as I’d love to go out with you, there’s too much cons to it. I mean-first off, I don’t want people calling you a fag or anything because you’re with me...second, I’m...scared of how the class’ll take it, especially for someone like you-“

“Eh?! What’s that supposed to mean?! Are you fucki-“

(Y/n) pushed past him, accidentally brushing his shoulder in the process.

“...And third, even if I’m too scared how the class would react, I’m too prideful to let Kaminari ‘predictions’ win.”

He was gone before Bakugou could turn around.

————

(Y/n) was late to class on purpose that day.

He didn’t want to risk it with Bakugou, Kaminari, anyone. He’s more afraid of the class than he is of getting scolded by Aizawa. And that was saying something.

So when he walked in the door, Bakugou gripping Kaminari’s tie and releasing small blasts in the air with his wound up hand, he didn’t know if he should replace ‘Getting Scolded By Aizawa’ with ‘Getting Murdered By Bakugou’ in his worries for today.

“Fucking idiot!” Bakugou growled, spit flying onto Kaminari’s face as he set off another blast. It was small enough not to cause damage to any desks or chairs around them, but it was close enough to Kaminari’s face to make him yelp. “I’ll fucking kill you!”

“Ow!” Kaminari half yelled-half whimpered. Bakugou’s hands heated up, glowing orange from under Kaminari’s chin. “Hey-HEY! Chill-!W-what did I even do?! OW!”

Bakugou slammed him against his desk by his blazer. “It’s your fuckin fault that shit-for-brains won’t go out with me!”

Another blast. This time, fired in the air but much bigger than before. Kaminari flinched. “Ah! S-shit-for...(L/n)?! How is it my fault?!”

“It’s your fault because you made him all scared and shit to go out with me! With your stupid prying ass! Now he won’t go out with me until I get you to apologize! So apologize so I can have a fuckin boyfriend! Go die!”

(Y/n) looked around the room. No one was trying to stop Bakugou from literally roasting Kaminari alive. Not even Iida. Everyone stood there, eyes locked on Kaminari or recording them while stifling snickers. (Y/n) walked up to Mina, who was recording and whispering commentary near the speaker.

“Uh...what’s happening? Why’s no one stopping Bakugou?”

Mine looked up. “Well-he kinda deserved it. I mean, he did act like a dick to you a few days ago. Bakugou’s just givin’ him a piece of his mind.” She fixed her angle on her phone, hunching down slightly in the process. “Also, glad to see you talking to us again, (L/n)~”

(Y/n) glances around the room once more. Everyone seemed to silently agree. Though, Iida looked like he was going to explode in his seat. Poor Iida. Poor Kaminari.

(Y/n) was brought out of his mind when Mina slowly panned her phone over to him. He was about to question her, when Kaminari was thrown carelessly at his feet. Bakugou kicked at Kaminari’s hunched figure, stepping on his back with his hands clenched in his pockets.

“Say it.”

Kaminari made a wheezing noise.

“FUCKIN’ SAY IT!”

“I-I’m sorry for outing you in-in front of our classmates...”

Bakugou dug his foot into Kaminari’s back. “LOUDER!”

“I’M SORRY-OW! FOR O-OUTING YOU IN FRONT OF OUR CLASSMATES-!”

Bakugou gave Kaminari a look saying to ‘keep going.’ Kaminari shot back with a face that said ‘dude. What you want me to say is fucking stupid.’

Bakugou snarled and fired another mini explosion into the air. Kaminari squeaked and looked up at (y/n), who had the most confused look on his face. Kaminari sighed.

“And...totally I don’t think that you and Bakugou are gonna get together...totally unexpected...”

Kaminari, even if he was about to be best to a pulp, couldn’t help the snicker from leaving his mouth. Bakugou, you dumb fuck. He was probably thinking back to the time (Y/n) said ‘I’m too prideful to let Kaminari ‘predictions’ win’. Even so, that was just dumb. Even for Bakugou.

Bakugou huffed contently, while Kaminari shakily pulled himself up. Bakugou thunked him on the head again. “There. Now you have no fuckin’ reason not to be my boyfriend. If you don’t I’ll kill you.”

(Y/n) hummed out of hesitation. “Ehhhh...but...”

“We allowed Bakugou to rough up Kaminari, which is a CLEAR violation of the rules, the least you could do is say yes, (y/n)-kun! Though I do believe Bakugou should be punished for his harsh actions.”

Iida jutted out from his seat, swinging his arm in the air. Everyone stayed silent for a second, until Tsuyu stepped forward. “I agree with Iida-Chan, kero. You two would look nice together.”

One by one, the class started saying how ‘cute’ they’d be together or that they didn’t care that (y/n) was Bi, much. It was different from when the class was clamoring around him, instead of all their voice blending together in one big ring, he could hear every single persons song of praise. He supposed it was alright. It wouldn’t hurt as much as he think it would.

(Y/n) sucked in a breath, and turned his head to Bakugou. He looked at (Y/n) almost expectantly.

“...fine....you win...you better take care of me, Bakugou.”

He turned his head and scoffed. “Idiot. I was gonna do that regardless.”

Mina started clapping and wolf whistling. Eventually, everyone started to clap and ‘aww’ed, before quickly rushing to their seats once they heard groggy footsteps approach the door.

A man with shaggy hair walked in. The class sat silent, staring at Aizawa. He sniffed and trailed his eyes around the room.

Setting his sleeping bag behind his podium, he pursed his lips. “Where is Kaminari?”

“W-whey...”

Kaminari was laying on the floor next to (y/n’s) seat, smiling dumbly with burn marks. He was pumping his fists with his thumbs sticking out. Everyone broke into a cold sweat.

“Would anyone like to tell me why Kaminari is out of his seat?”

Oh fuck.

Bakugou got 3 days house arrest.

——————

Jdjdjejejc this was real fun to write HAHAHAHA I’m lowkey proud of it

#bnha x male reader #bnha x reader #mha x male reader #mha x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugou x male reader #bakugou x y/n #bakugou imagine #bnha bakugou #mha bakugou #bakugou katsuki #bakugou katuski x reader #class 1 a x reader #x male reader #boku no hero academia #my hero academia

2K notes · View notes

archiepudding · 3 years

Text

Confession | Dom!Dabi x Reader [Part 2]

Pairing: Dom!Dabi x Fem!Reader (Minors do not interact!)

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, smut, slapping, quirk play, small amounts of sadism, dubcon, angst, PANIC ATTACK

Notes: Your quirk is telepathy. Anything written in ‘bold and italic’ is the character’s thoughts.

Summary: Following one of your shifts at the bar, you end up facing a little trouble. Who knew Dabi was the sentimental type.

Part 1

01:30 PM 04th August

The lights were bright as they illuminated the coffee shop, the smell of freshly ground coffee invaded your nostrils. A figure moved forward, their pale skin glistening under the light. “Black coffee, please.” You tried to focus on your current order, but it’s very hard when everything else is a lot more interesting, I guess it’s good that it doesn’t require too much brain capacity. As you stand at the counter, wondering if there was more to life than you had experienced, you realised the slave you were in the cog of society.

Only 3 more hours until you can go home, then you can kick your feet up and watch some Netflix, you thought to yourself. A buzz causes your head to shoot over to the other side of the counter. The screen lit up on your phone, causing your jaw to clench. It had been a few months since that night. You couldn’t face him now. Maybe a week, but 3 months...

‘No, you can’t phone him now! I mean he’s still trying so maybe he wouldn’t be mad... who am I kidding, I’d murder me if I had been ignored for this long. You’re so stupid!’ you scorned yourself.

Zoned out on your phone, you were jolted back into reality by your boss “I don’t pay you to stand there on your phone!” Your eyes rolled as you put your phone back under the counter.

“Sorry sir! Won’t happen again!” From his expression you made sure to tread carefully the rest of your shift.

04:45 PM 04th August

Leaving the staff room, you threw your bag over your shoulder, your hand slipped into your coat pocket and checked your phone - 04:45PM. You put your phone back into your pocket and headed out the cafe.

Sunlight reflected off the white building surrounding you. The summer afternoon heat hitting you in the face. The sea of humanity that you were met with forced you to bottle the claustrophobia you felt building inside you. The scent of over-applied perfumes mixed with body odour spun around you until a stranger brought the unwelcomed smell you were ever so familiar with: putrid sweat, mixed with stale beer and burnt tobacco plagued your senses. Everything in front of you seemed to carrying on moving as your feet became heavy. You felt the panic grow within you as your heart pounded against your chest. Your hands shook. Your whole body tingled as you tried to hide the sweat dripping from your forehead.

“Are you alright, miss?”

In seconds you were huddled on the floor, the crowd of people you had now acclaimed only added insult to injury. You prayed as you attempted to to slow your breathing, but you only seemed to be able to gasp in this moment. The world around you was spinning as you covered your ears, trying to make everything slow down. You felt sick.

“Is she ok?”

“Do we need to call someone?”

“I think she’s having a panic attack!”

Your vision is blurred as someone was now in front of you. Their words attempted to reach you but only bounced off the racket already forcing its way into your head. Your fingers were white-knuckled as they clung onto your hair. Please stop.

“Hey! Can you hear me? Hey, just breathe... here follow me. In.... and out.... in.... and out....” It took you a few minutes to adjust and see a gentleman crouched in front of you. He repeats himself, as he guided you through his instructions.

“I can’t... breathe.” your breaths fell short, your hand now clutching at your chest.

“EVERYONE BACK OFF. KEEP ON MOVING SHE’LL BE FINE!” the man watched as you rocked back and forth, on the pavement. The crowd dispersing back into their normal routines.

Your chest loosens, not fully but enough to allow you to regain more control of your breathing. You tried to regain your composure. As you pushed yourself from the floor your legs begged you to return to your former position. Your eyes were bloodshot as you realised your face was wet from crying. The embarrassment you felt was immense, as you kept your head bowed. Your eyes not leaving your feet.

“T-thank you, sir. I’ll be fine now. Thank you again.”

“You don’t have to thank me. Are you sure you will be ok?”

“Yes, I don’t live far. I’ll be ok.”

“Well stay safe.” You heard him yell behind you as you scurried as fast as you could back to your apartment.

6:55 PM 04th August

You laid on the bed and listened to the sound of rain drumming on your balcony, the warmth of your blanket surrounded you. You felt safe. The view from your bed side was dim, but even in the low light the the way the streets lights flickered in between each rain drop brought a light smile to your face. Heavy pours washing away the sins of the city, as you lay hidden in your room. With your head laid against your pillow, a wave of relaxation flows through you, but to your dismay the sound of the door broke you out of your reverie. You check the alarm clock by your bed and notice it’s pretty late for someone to be visiting out of the blue. A gentle breeze brushed over your bare legs as you crawled off your warm bed, a knee-length, laced nighty being your only form of barrier against the chill. You trudged to your front door, your body stumbling through your flat. Without even looking through the peephole you open the door, only for your heart to hitch in your chest, your eyes widening as every part of you seems to go on pause.

“You going to let me in?” Turquoise eyes met yours.

A cold sweat brushed over you as you step to the side, Dabi making his way into your apartment. He seemed to be taking every inch of the place in, his attention finally landing on your living room windows. A few dark clouds lingered in the evening sky as a few scraggly trees waved in the breeze. You sat down at your dining table, puzzled by your former friends' actions. You crossed your legs and tapped your fingers on the table, to stop the silence that covered the room.

“The weather took a turn today, huh?” he attempted to keep things light but it was all in vain.

“What are you doing here Dabi?” You spat.

“There wasn’t any way of getting a hold of you, so I thought you couldn’t ignore me if I turned up in person.”

“Okay... well what do you want?”

“I just wanted to check you were ok? The last time I saw you, you were bruised and now all of a sudden you’ve just kept ignoring me...” You remained quiet, as you waited for him to finish his sentence, but instead a heavy silence settled in the room, both your eyes shifted on different objects to avoid catching the others glance. You couldn’t take it anymore, focusing your mind you chose to invade his thoughts.

‘Fuck you’re making this awkward. What is wrong with you. Just say it you sack of shit! You’ve fucking gone over it enough times.... just say it!’

“Just say what?”

“Get out of my fucking head!”

“Get out my house then!”

“Why do you keep pushing me away?”

“Because I don’t want you here!” After processing what you had just said to him, your hand instinctively covers mouth. Your eyes pleaded for forgiveness.

“Fuck, I didn’t mean it like that. I just have a lot going on right now. I just can’t keep reliving that night... just walking home from work today, I had a fucking panic attack on the street because I could smell HIM. I- I heard them die... The smell of their burning bodies haunts me, Dabi. It’s just too much.”

“Do you blame me?”

“What? No, if anything I blame myself. You were right, if I had just met with you after my shift, that night would of never of happened...” irritation bubbled inside you. You left your seat and joined Dabi in the conjoining living room.

“So, you regret what happened with us?”

“I didn’t say that...”

He took a step closer to you. He had never been one to follow the romance novels, movies or anything of that sort, it made him shudder at the prospect. This, on the other hand, almost felt natural for him. He couldn’t understand why he couldn’t keep away from you. Why you were all he had thought about day and night since the last time you were together.

He moved closer.

“You want to know why I’m here Y/N?” You expected his voice to be bitter, but it was quite the opposite. The words softly-spoken, almost heartfelt. “because I don’t know how I could have been so stupid, because I don’t know how I ever let you go that night. The thought of another man touching you in that way.” He let out a low laugh. “I could have burned the lot of them.”

You couldn’t speak. There was so much you wanted to say to him, but you couldn’t find the words.

“You are all I can think about,” he continued, “the way you laugh at my ridiculous jokes, and how you stand up to me and not caring about the repercussions, you make me feel alive.”

“Dabi... don’t...” you whimpered; his eyes bored into yours. “I don’t... I don’t think it would be a good idea...”. The words you spoke cut him deep, everything fell on this moment, he couldn’t let you go again.

He took another step towards you.

“Is that what you want?” He was so close he could feel your breath on his cheek. He didn’t know how he never realised it before now. He didn’t want to live without you, you were the only thing left in this world that he deemed worth living for. It was always you.

“Please don’t make this any harder.” Your eyes seemed saddened; your voice soft as it was filled with defeat. His body moved away; all the nervousness you were feeling suddenly ran away as the space grew between you both.

“You’re right,” in this moment he had never been so glad that he couldn’t cry, his fists clenched, “this was a mistake.”

“No! Dabi wait-”

“No, it’s fine Y/N. You’ve made your feelings perfectly clear.” his stare was venomous, you had never seen him turn on you like this before, your words caught in your throat. He threw the door open, the hinges almost tearing off the wall as he stormed out. You shuddered as the door slammed shut, the walls of your apartment shaking as the force could be heard through your apartment complex.

Did I make the right choice, you thought? For years you knew there was a mutual attraction, and after that night your suspicions were confirmed, but you never thought it could be anything more. Your knees felt weak as they began to buckle underneath you. Had you really been that oblivious? After thinking back on your time together your stomach drops as you begin to realise that if you weren’t so caught up in your own mess this whole time, you would have realised how miserable you had been without him. Plagued with the thought of his reaction when something funny would come up only for your mood to suddenly sink when you remembered he wasn’t there. The feeling of his arms wrapped around you, caressing your sides were the only thing that soothed you as you tried to get to sleep. Each time your mind wandered; you would think back to when you were so close you could feel your heart attempting to escape. Then it dawned on you.

Your lungs burnt as you ran down the stairs of your apartment building, cursing the bastard that didn’t wait for you at the elevator. Your footsteps echoed through the stairwell as each level number became a blurred glimpse in your peripheral. At the bottom you raced to the end of the hall, your body forcing the door open as you stumbled into the street.

“DABI!” Your voice shattered the serenity of the night.

His body froze. The pain behind your voice was something he could share. “Don’t go...” You were now stood a meter away from him, even with his back to you, you couldn’t look at him. The weight of your body shifted between your bare feet. When he turned to face you, his expression was harsh.

“Don’t mess me around Y/N!”

“I’m not messing you around! You come over and basically confess all these things to me and just expect me to have an answer?” A fierce scowl was reserved on your face as you glanced away, trying to contain your emotions. “For 3 months I’ve been trying to process what happened to me, to try and get my fucking head sorted.” Your eyes returned to his, now filled with tears. “I don’t know where I am in my life at all, but after tonight... after watching you leave... I realised that you are the one thing in my life that is clear and it has been hell not talking to you. I just want you to know that, I’m sorry.”

You had never experienced a moment in your life when time stopped before. A split-second where you felt like you were in a world of your own. For Dabi, he knew everything had changed. All he could focus on was the way your hair draped over your cheekbones, a slow drop of rain trailed down your nose, leading his focus to your plumped lips. He moved closer.

Your hand brushed across his, your fingers intertwined with one another. He took another step closer. Your head began to spin thinking of all the possibilities, but not realising you are fighting a losing battle as you try to shake off your thoughts.

You took a step towards him. As you gazed into his eyes you weren’t sure who made the first move, but your lips were now locked together. All your senses were heightened, but only for him, the way his lips felt against yours and the way his hand caressed the back of your neck, pulling you closer into his touch was intoxicating.

“I’m sorry...” you were hesitant with your words, “I just didn’t want to hurt you.” Dabi paused, as your heart sank awaiting his reply. Eyebrows furrowed; a smirk draw across his face. “I’m willing to take the risk.” His embrace soothed you as you continued where you left off, making your way back to your apartment.

You fumbled with your door, Dabi’s head nuzzled into the side of neck as his arms wrapped around your waist from behind.

“Hurry up and open the door...” He pleaded.

“Are you always this eager?”

“Only for you.” You felt his lips pull into a smirk. You continued to try and unlock the door, but each kiss made you weak at the knees. Growing impatient, Dabi snatched your keys from your hand, swiftly unlocking the door before he kicked it open, cursing under his breath as he threw you in. Closing the door behind him, it took him all but a second to reconnect with your lips, his hand clasped around your throat. “I’m never going to let you go...” His voice sent shivers down your spine. You leaned into his lips; your arms wrapped around his neck as your fingers trailed through his hair. You felt the heat of his fingertips as small burn marks appeared on your lower back. Dabi tugged at the bottom of your night dress before pushing it upwards, revealing your naked body. Your cheeks blushed as you felt embarrassed before you covered your chest.

“Don’t, you’re beautiful.” Although his words were sweet, his tone was that of someone in control. His hands roamed your body, he made you feel a way no one ever has. Teeth marks lay on your skin as he loved the way you sounded when you screamed, not knowing if it from pleasure or pain. It gave you strange pleasure knowing he was enjoying it as much as you. Bare skin stood in front of him as you felt him move towards your core and a hand slipped in between your legs. You let out a giggle as your pants are slid down your thighs and fell to the floor. Dabi hooked your right leg over his arm giving himself a better angle as two fingers lightly played with your folds, their tips breached your opening.

“Glad to know someone’s excited.” His smile became mischievous. Both your hands around his neck to balance yourself.

“I could say the same!” Your left leg stood in between his as you felt that his member had certainly matched your excitement. His lips found yours again as your tongues moved with one another, the ecstasy almost too much for you to contain. The build-up going from sweet to desperate, you both parted your bodies, his shirt being removed in the process. He pinned you against the wall. Teeth bit down on your bottom lip as you gave into the lust. His thumb brushed over your clit.

“Oh, god!” You exclaimed.

“I prefer, Dabi. But I guess I’ll accept the name change in this moment.”

“If I wasn’t in such an awkward position right now, I’d beat the shit out of y-” You were cut short as he added another digit inside you. Your knees began to buckle as his grip tightened around your waist, your faces inches apart.

“I’d like to see you try...” His tone was daring but his eyes said otherwise. As though he was establishing dominance, he dropped your leg, his free hand taking your wrist before leading you to your bedroom.

“Get on the bed.”

You folded your arms. Scowling with a pout, you kept your feet firmly by the bedroom door, Dabi now situated next to your bedside.

“Seriously?” He questioned. You remained silent; your previous action unchanged.

“Aww. Is someone annoyed?” You taunt as though you are talking to a child. He burst out laughing, his voice becoming menacing. “If you want to act like a brat,” he sauntered towards you, forcefully pushing you to your knees, “then I’ll treat you like one!”

The sound of his zip sent a pulsation of sensual gratification through your body. You stare at him in anticipation. His abdominals caught your attention as your lips trailed wet kisses down to the brim of his boxers. Dabi shuddered under your touch, his thighs clenching. You reached for his waistband and pull down his underwear, his member sprung free. Your lips wrapped around him; a gentle suck caused his hips to move forward. He locked onto your gaze, your tongue flicking over his tip, raising your eyebrows with satisfaction. He wanted more. Spit dribble down his shaft as your hand assisted with slow motions. Low grunts now interrupted the silence. Dabi’s hand snaked through your hair as he helped your head bob up and down, his hand becoming more forceful with each stroke. A gag erupted as you took him all into your mouth, tears streaming down your face. Dabi looked down at you, your red and messy face making him hornier.

“Now get on the bed and don’t make me ask again!” He demanded.

You climbed onto it, positioning yourself in the middle but you were startled when you were flipped onto your back, Dabi forcibly pulling your legs apart and dragging you to the edge of the bed. Heat rose at your core as you watch him drag his tongue up your thigh and towards your pussy. You grinded against his face as his tongue worked in many different ways, devouring you. A knot began to build in your stomach.

“I’m gunna cum!” A euphoric blur washed over you as you began to tremble. Dabi slipped a couple of fingers into you as you writhed in front of him.

“Good girl.” He praised, crawling onto the bed. “Now we don’t want to get this dirty, do we?” He said as he removed your night gown, throwing it in the corner of the room. He positioned himself on top of you and teased your entrance. “Are you sure?” He asked.

You nodded. He slowly began to thrust inside of you. You tried to relax under his movement as you felt yourself clench around him; his hand soothed you as it caressed your sides. His body trapped you against the bed and his lips moved down your jawline. Sucking your skin, he left small bruises in their place. You threw your head back, letting out deep breaths each time he thrusted. He fell to his elbows as he let out a low growl.

“I... I love you...” The silence that surrounded you was almost deafening, hadn’t it been for the slamming of naked skin and the irritating squeak of your bed. The realisation of what he said out loud made his face heat up as the tip of his nose sported a deep blush.

‘Oh god, oh god, oh god. She thinks I’m weird. Why would you say that?’

A wave of confidence hit you as you pushed him to your left. You clambered to your knees, swinging a leg over him, guiding him back inside you, you straddled his cock.

“I love you too.”

Dabi grinded against you. Your words were breathless as you bounced on top of him, his hand playing with your clit as the other left a stinging sensation on your behind.

“Fuck, Y/N. That’s it, show me how much you want my cock.” He thrusted harder as he could feel himself coming to the end. Your legs began to burn, slowing the pace. Before you could do anything, you were back on your back, Dabi on top once again. His hand pressed deeply around you throat as he thrusted harder into you. You tried to cry out in pleasure but they only came out as breathless gasps, your face turning a deep shade of red. He continued pounding you for a few more seconds before releasing his grasp, your lungs aching from the lack of air. Dabi’s mind began to spin as started to cum. His moans muffled as you pulled him into you, your tongues yet again fighting for dominance. His body became limp as half on top of you, his face resting upon your chest and his arm draped across your stomach. You both laid there for a while, your breaths shallow from the well need exercise you just partook in.

“Did you mean it?” Dabi’s face looked up at you, his voice softer than usual.

“Mean what?” You asked.

“That you love me?”

A small laugh escaped you, your arm drawing circles on his back. “I think in a strange way... I always have.” He tightened his arm around you, pulling you into him, your back now pressed against his chest. A light kiss graced your shoulder before he responded. “I’m glad to hear that.” Shortly after, you both fell asleep in each other arms.

#dabi smut #dabi x y/n #dabi x you #reader x dabi #bhna dabi #bnha x reader #bnha smut #bnha fanfiction #mha smut #mha x reader #mha x y/n #mha angst #mha dabi #dabi angst #dabi fanfic

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hyunderwater · 2 years

Text

imagine being a lesbian (5)

ship: ryujin x yeji

warning: continuous themes of homophobia throughout, don’t read if that triggers you

note: so sorry if this has typos or something my brain is offline

ao3 link

1-2-3-4-5-6-7

- - -

The light from her computer screen bled into her eyes, blurring as they drooped closed.

Staying up until three in the morning sounds fun in theory, but when you’re doing it to finish an essay, it’s hell. Ryujin could barely think anymore, let alone thread together intelligent sentences.

She let her eyes close, sleep reaching up to claim her.

Then, her phone buzzed loudly.

She fumbled around for it, wincing as it turned on, displaying the message she’d received.

toothless: i talked to chae.

Ryujin stared at the message, processing it. Then it clicked, and sleep retracted its claws. Her fingers trembled as she typed out a response.

me: jesus fduck holy shit this is so nerve wrcaking

me: i hate tihs

me: what did she sya

toothless: *say

me: FUCK YOU

toothless: she said that she and lia are free to meet after school tomorrow

She groaned, her head smacking into the wall behind her. Why did I choose tonight to deprive myself of sleep?

me: k cool ill tell yuna tmrw but ik that they have nthing that afternoon so they’ll be there

toothless: good :D

Ryujin smiled down at her phone. At least I’ll have her and Yuna beside me.

She worried the hem of her skirt between her hands, adjusting it over and over.

“Yeji, where’s Yuna?”

Yeji paused her pacing to sigh at Ryujin. “I don’t know, Jinnie. You’re the one who has her number.”

Ryujin groaned, shoving her face in her hands.

“I’ve already called her like four goddamn times and she won’t pick up the phone!” Ryujin stood up, then sat down on the same bench again.

“God, I can’t believe her!”

Yeji gave her a look.

“What?”

“Ryujin…” she paused to sigh, glancing at the door of the school. Turning back to face Ryujin, she continued: “Do you think that maybe you’re so anxious about this because you actually miss them? And you’re afraid of their reactions?”

Ryujin bit her lip.

“I know I am.” She laughed a little. “I know. It’s stupid to let all of those messy feelings out because of Yuna being late, huh?”

Yeji sat down next to her.

“It’s not stupid, you’re not actually blaming Yuna. Can I ask you something?”

Ryujin nodded.

“Why did you avoid us after- after you came out?”

“I think I was just scared. After my parents found out I felt almost… disgusting. Eventually, it got better, and I told myself I’d never let myself feel that insignificant again. Then, you guys.”

“Oh.” Yeji’s voice was clogged with the barest hint of tears.

“I don’t want to make you feel bad, that’s not what I was trying to do, but I just felt like you needed to at least know how you all made me feel in that moment.”

“I’m sorry-”

“You don’t have to-”

“No, let me do this, Ryujin. I was stupid. Well, no shit, but you know what I mean. You know what I used to think? I used to think that gay people were rare, and that I couldn’t possibly be queer. It was almost like some myth to me. You’re gonna laugh at me for this, but it was almost like you guys were magical beings. Like you existed, but nobody I knew was one of you, and you were surrounded with that shroud of the unknown, something that was riddled with the darkness someone else had put on the canvas. That dark put there to make me hate you.” She snorted. “What a load of stinking, steaming horse shit.”

“Lovely picture you painted there, Hwang.”

“Shut your mouth. Anyways, I know more now, about myself, and how our world works. And I think they do too.”

Ryujin wrapped her arms around Yeji, sinking into her warmth.

“How do you always know what to say?” she murmured.

“I just know you too well,” Yeji said.

Ryujin squeezed her tighter. “That’s dangerous.”

Yeji chuckled softly, her breath tickling Ryujin’s ear. “Don’t worry, baby. I won’t hurt you. Not again.”

“Not to interrupt or like… cock-block- pussy-block? Yeah. Not to pussy-block y’all- ooh, but that’s not as catchy though. Clit-hit? No, that sounds like I’m hitting your clit. V-”

“We should probably just go,” Ryujin interrupted Yuna, getting up from the bench.

According to Yeji, they were going to meet in the park close to Lia’s house. The familiar scenery put a dagger through Ryujin’s stomach, a stinging blade of nostalgia to the gut.

They reached the small park, and caught sight of Lia and Chaeryeong standing next to the benches that they used to sit on whenever they met up at the park.

Something suspiciously like a tear stung the corner of Ryujin’s eye, and she blinked hard. As if she could sense Ryujin’s distress, Yeji reached over and squeezed her hand. “We’re gonna be okay.”

Chaeryeong caught sight of them approaching, smacking Lia’s shoulder and gesturing excitedly at them. The look on Lia’s face caught Ryujin off guard. Her expression was a mix of guilt, shame, sadness, and a note of happiness. She was happy to see her. Somehow, that made the whole situation feel a lot less like a bucket of tears.

They reached the benches, and stood awkwardly, two groups facing each other.

Then Chaeryeong let out a soft sob and dashed forward, catching Yuna in an embrace, and the tension shattered, dissolved.

As the two youngest hugged, Lia approached Ryujin. “Uh, hi,” she said.

“It’s been a while, huh?”

Lia’s face crumpled.

“I am so, so, sorry. I know that doesn’t even begin to cover it, but… I didn’t know what to do with that. I was so opposed to change, it… poisoned me. Warped my perception of you, all because of which gender you’re attracted to. Something told me that you were different after that, like you weren’t the exact same person you were before, the same person you’ve been your whole life. That wasn’t fair of me. I think- I hope I’ve changed now. Become a better person, you know? Not someone who would dump their friends in a heartbeat over irrational prejudices.”

“Thank you. For apologizing.”

Lia shrugged. “It’s sorta the bare minimum.”

“Ha, yeah. It is. I want you to know, I want to be friends again, but I don’t want to pick up where we left off, I want to start over. Get to know you, the better you.”

Lia smiled her little close-lipped smile, her eyes bunching into cute little half-moons. “That sounds nice.”

She drifted away to talk to Yeji, and Chaeryeong pounced on Ryujin.

“Jinnie!”

“Hi, Chae!” Ryujin didn’t hesitate to accept the hug, leaning into the familiar arms.

“I missed your stupid face.”

“Aww, I missed you too. Who else was I gonna talk shit with in the middle of the night?”

Chaeryeong gasped. “Ooh, that reminds me. Have you heard what happened with Minho and Jisung?”

“Oh my god, did something finally happen?”

Chae smirked. “You bet your flat ass something happened. Minho found Jisung’s lyric book and accidentally read one of the songs-”

“You’re shitting me.”

“-and it was about him. I’m totally serious, that infos’ from Chan, so it’s definitely true. I also heard that they fucked, but I heard it from Hyunjin, so there’s like a sixty percent change it’s total bullshit.”

“I don’t know, I feel like Minho probably would have texted me about them fucking by now if something happened.”

Chaeryeong shrugged. “We’ll see.”

Yeji joined them, hooking her hand around Ryujin’s arm. “Hey, sorry to interrupt, but who do we hate now? We need to update the list, it’s been so long.”

As they talked, Ryujin could see Chaeryeong keep looking at Yeji’s hand curled around her arm. Chaeryeong raised an eyebrow, and Ryujin raised hers right back. What’s wrong with her?

Soon, it was almost five. Yuna stood up, stretching. “Okay, guys, I gotta go home. I have a shit ton of homework, so.”

“Okay, yeah, we should probably all get home,” Yeji agreed, getting up too. In a flurry of goodbyes, Chaeryeong pulled Ryujin to the side.

“Hey, Jinnie, I’ve sorta been meaning to ask this since the other day, but what’s going on between you and Yeji? You don’t need to tell me, but…”

Ryujin sighed. “No, Chae, it’s okay. Nothing’s really going on. She’s trying to figure out if she likes girls, and I’m sapphic and available, so it’s a win-win!”

Chaeryeong frowned.

“No, you idiot. It’s not a win-win. It’s a win-get played and get your heart stomped into the dirt. Don’t you realize the position you’ve put yourself into? I, of all people, would know you well enough to know that you would only accept something like that if you were weak for that person, and you’re definitely weak for Yeji. She’s gonna hurt you, and the worst part is, it’s not gonna be intentional, so you’ll only have yourself to blame.”

“So what do I do, Chae?” Ryujin snapped. Tears blurred her vision. “How do you propose I fix this mess?”

“Tell her.”

Ryujin shrunk back into herself.

“No. It’ll ruin everything.”

“Look at her, Ryujin.”

Ryujin looked over at Yeji, and met her sparkling eyes.

“She looks at you like she can’t decide if she’d rather shove her tongue in your mouth or kiss your face all over like one of those disgusting high school couples.”

“Maybe, but I can’t push my feelings onto her before she realizes her own. You know her, she’ll do anything to make people happy.”

“She’ll do anything to make you happy.”

Ryujin whipped her head around to stare at Chaeryeong. “What?”

She shrugged. “I never said she’s not generous, but she’s not a pushover. She has limits for everyone… except you. She’d break the Earth in half if you asked her to. You should have seen her during those horrible months after you came out… she hated herself for it.”

Chaeryeong turned to hug her again.

“I said that she was the one with the power to hurt you in that relationship, but I was partially wrong. I think you could both stab each other in the back, but you’ve both chosen to drop the knife. She would do anything for you. It’s the least you could do to be honest about your feelings,” Chaeryong said, slightly muffled through Ryujin’s shoulder.

Later that night, lying awake in her bed, Ryujin turned that conversation over and over in her head. “She would do anything for you.” But does she want to?

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deanandthephantoms · 3 years

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We're a Perfect Harmony PT.3 - Reader x Charlie

This is Chapter 3 of my Perfect Harmony story. You can read Chapter 1 here and Chapter 2 here if you haven't yet. In this chapter we'll see what life after camp is like for y/n and Charlie.. Enjoy!

Missing you more than i should..

When I got home I was overwhelmed by the amount of silence in my home. I used to love being home, curling up on the couch watching a movie or reading a book in silence. I hated loud, crowded places and now I actually missed it? What happened to me? Who am I?! I thought to myself..

“Y/N is that you?” I heard my mom call out from the living room. “Hi mom!” i said while walking up to her and giving her a big hug. “How are you doing honey? How was it?” I hadn’t really spoken to my mom at all during the week, I had let her know once that I was doing alright and that was basically it. “It was incredible mom. I had the best group of people surrounding me..” and so I told her everything about my new group of friends and everything we had done during the week.. “Thanks for making me go mom.” “You’re glowing Y/N! I’m so happy you had such a good time. I honestly felt bad for making you go when I saw how nervous you were.” “yeah.. I kind of hated you for that.. but I guess sometimes mom really does know best.” After talking to my mom I decided to lay down for a bit all those late night chill sessions with Charlie and a night of not sleeping at all was really taking it’s toll, I don’t think I had ever been this tired before. I fell asleep with a smile on my face only to wake up the next freaking day at 10am. I slept for 15 hours I really had been tired.. I picked up my phone to see I was indeed added to the girls group chat, I was also in a chat with our entire camp group and Charlie had , like he promised, sent me a private text. Seeing that put a smile on my face. Now I know what you’re thinking.. but I really just liked him as a friend that’s all. I opened his message.

“Good morning Nugget! On a scale of 1 to 100% dead.. how tired are you?” I raised my eyebrow at the nugget part, no idea where that was coming from. Without hesitation I replied.. “ Hellllooooo! Nugget? What’s up with that? Very bold of you to assume that I was even tired to begin with by the way.. but to answer your question, I have slept for 15 hours.. that says something doesn’t it?” I was about to put my phone down assuming Charlie would take his sweet time to reply. But no. the 3 dots that told me he was typing appeared almost instantly and seconds later this popped up on my screen; “15 HOURS?! Really? Are you sure you weren’t dead and came back to life or something? I thought I was bad with my 12 hours.. I’m blaming you for the fact I’m so tired by the way.” He’s blaming me?! Excuse me? “Pardon? What? What did I do?!” “You kept me up till at least 3am every night only to be woken up again at 7am.. i’ve never been so tired coming home after camp. So yes I’m blaming you Nugget.” “The nugget again? Really? Anyway. I’m not sorry. You kept ME up actually. I’m blaming you Charlie.” “Yes Nugget. You mentioned once you like nuggets. I’m calling you nugget now. You can’t stop me. Oh and I’m not sorry either 😉” “Riiight. Don’t expect me to start calling you after one of your gross foods.. but all jokes aside, i’m glad you’re not sorry. I mean, all those late nights might be one of my favorite things of last week.” “Really? I genuinely thought I annoyed the shit out of you.” That text made me laugh. “Don’t get your hopes up Gillespie. You sure did. Apparently you’re just the type of guy who gets away with it.” I teased. “Ouch.. that hurt. :( “ is all I got as a reply. Which caused my brain to go in full panic mode, did I just really hurt my new friend? Oh god what if this ruined it all? As fast I could I sent him “I’m sorry! I’m just kidding! You know that right?! You didn’t annoy me at all dude, in fact you did the opposite you made me feel super chill and comfortable..” I stared at my screen for what felt like hours, in reality it was probably more like 5 minutes but I got no reply..

I sighed deciding to ignore my own stupid actions I got up from my bed and went downstairs making myself some breakfast. Sitting down at the table I actually found myself missing the man that had sat opposite of me the entire week. I was missing the man that made me feel sick with his strange food combinations. Missing the man that called me out for looking dead after 3 hours of sleep. Missing the man that annoyed me with how loud he was so early in the morning. Don’t get me wrong I missed the others as well they had all, in their own way, made that week a very good week for me. I had just connected with Charlie in a different way, he seemed to really get me, he understood where I was coming from. He had not once judged me, he made me come out of my comfort zone.. My phone buzzed on the table, my hand flew straight to it and picked it up only to see Charlie had replied. I felt my heart speed up and started feeling very nervous. Why was this happening? why was i scared for his reply? We had been teasing each other right from the start. This could not have been so bad that I ruined everything, right?!

With a deep sigh I opened our chat back up. “Y/N calm down. I know. I was just kidding too! Good to know I made you feel that way though. You do realize you did the same for me right? You made me feel better when I was feeling down. I really appreciate that.” I couldn’t help but let out a big sigh of relief. Thank god everything was alright. Why did I care so much? I had known this man for 8 days. Why was I already so afraid of ruining this friendship? “Charlie, I swear to god, you can never do that to me again! I thought I ruined it all..” I typed, but deleted. I didn’t want him to know a simple joke made me go into full panic mode, he’ll think I’m crazy.. so instead I went with “ha-ha, very funny Gillespie. And hey, cheering each other up, that’s what friends are for right? 😊” “Yeah definitely. You didn’t have to do that though, you barely knew me. Yet seemed to know me better than the people I’ve known for years. You noticed things others didn’t notice or they just decided to ignore it. You didn’t. You’re a good friend Nugget. I’m thankful for getting a chance to meet and know you.”

Reading that made me feel al warm and fuzzy inside I just sat there at the kitchen table with a dumb goofy smile on my face. That’s when my mom walked in. “What are you smiling about?” “ohhh nah it’s nothing.” I simply replied, hoping my mom would buy it. Too bad for me my mom knew me longer than today. “It’s a boy, isn’t it?” “Mom! I.. eeh.. no?.. I mean.. well technically.. Yes. But no. Charlie is just a friend mom.” And I truly believed I felt that way, my mom clearly didn’t though ..”oh alright, well we’ll see.” She replied. Before leaving me once again to get back to her office. I directed my attention back to the screen “You’re a good friend too Charlie. I’m thankful my mom made me go to camp. Thankful I now can call a few amazing people my new friends. I really miss you guys. Is that weird?” “Thank your mom from me for making you go! 😉 And no, that’s not weird. We all feel that way after camp. Don’t worry the feeling will vanish over time and we’ll keep in touch through texts and facetime!” “Facetime huh? Why don’t we facetime later, you can thank my mom yourself haha!” i texted half jokingly but Charlie seemed to think it was a good idea. We kept sending text to each other the rest of day and I noticed I was looking forward to seeing his face again. I missed his bright smile, his facial expressions that said everything for me. His eyes that showed he was fully invested in whatever you’re telling him. I missed his hugs. They really were the best hugs I had ever had. I sighed at the thought of having to miss those for a whole year.. Can’t exactly hug through facetime, can you?

Later that night Charlie called me on facetime, accepting his call I saw his bright smile pop up on my screen. “Nuggeeettt!” he screamed at me sounding all excited. I couldn’t help but instantly feel happy and laugh at him. I refused to get used to that nickname but also decided not to fight him on it tonight. “Gillespieeeeeeee!” I just screamed back at him earning a big smile in return. “Soo, first things first, get me to your mom, I need to thank her.” “Your wish is my command sir!” I reply as I get up from my bed to find my mom. I find her in the livingroom on the couch. “Hey mom, Charlie wants to tell you something” I say while handing her the phone. “Hello Mrs.Y/L/N!” “Ah, so you’re Charlie! I’ve already heard quite a bit about you.” If looks could kill I would have killed my own mom right then and there.. “Yes.. that would be me. I just wanted to thank you for sending your daughter to camp. She has been a good friend to all of us.” My mom laughed “You’re welcome dear. Thank you for doing the same to her” My mom then handed me my phone back. Giving her one last glare I make my way back to my bedroom. “Sorry about that..” I say to Charlie while walking upstairs. “Sorry for what? Your mom seems lovely. No need to be sorry.” Thankful for the fact he apparently did not pick up on the whole ‘heard quite a bit about you.’ I let out big breath I apparently had been holding in.

I sat back down on my bed and luckily for me Charlie had grabbed his guitar “so. How about we continue our little tradition of singing? Name a song and we’ll sing it.” He said with the biggest smile. I was just glad I did not have to explain why I apologized and quickly started thinkin of a song. “Do you know High hopes by Kodaline? It’s not the happiest song, but it’s sooo good!” “I’m kind of offended by the fact you’re even asking me if I know it.. It’s actually one of the first songs I learned to play on this guitar.” And before I could apologize for offending him I heard the first chords of High hopes being played. As if we were still on camp we sang a few songs, granted it didn’t go as smooth thanks to delay in the video and such but still it was nice. After a few songs I heard my mom come up and calling out a good night. “Char.. I think I’m gonna have to go. My mom is going to bed so you know I gotta be quiet now…” “Nooo! don’t hang up just yet. We can still just talk for a bit right?” I was caught of guard by his plea for me to stay. “I, eh. Yeah. Yeah we can. Of course we can. Give me a second though. I’m gonna change into my PJ’s.” and with that I threw my phone on the bed, grabbing my oversized Rush t-shirt that basically functioned as a sleeping dress. “Nice ceiling you’ve got there nugget.” I heard Charlie call out. Giving him a chuckle as response. Once I changed into my PJ’s I picked my phone up and brought Charlie with me to the bathroom. “Loving the house tour Y/N, where are we going now?” “To the bathroom. I need to brush my teeth.” “oh right let me go do the same!” and he sprinted of with me to his own bathroom. About a minute later we were brushing our teeth together. causing us both to giggle at each others charming facial expressions.

After I was done I went back to my bedroom and crawled into bed making myself comfortable. “sooo I assume you don’t want to be here when I go pee right?” “Eeew Charles! No. Either hang up the phone or put me somewhere far away!” He laughed at me “Yeah thought so. I’m not hanging up so let me just put you down on my bed.” “ Oof.. That also sounds a bit strange sir.. But sure. You do that.” “kinda does, doesn’t it?” he laughed “Okay, I’ll be back, don’t go anywhere.” And with that I was staring at Charlie’s ceiling waiting for him to come back.. which he did incredibly quickly.

Crawling into his own bed he picked me up only to instantly put me back down again."You actually waited for me!" He said while I could see him taking off his shirt nothing I had not seen before but still a sight I sure was not mad about. “of course i waited, why would i leave without saying goodbye?” i reply before Charlie fell back down on the bed and picked me back up, trying to get comfortable he was tossing and turning a bit. “You alright there, Charlie?” I said half teasingly. “Yeah, quite comfortable actually. You? I really like your shirt by the way.” Why did I feel myself starting to blush? Acting as if nothing was happening to me I replied in my chillest and coolest way; “Yeah I’m alright. Very comfortable as well actually. Nothing beats sleeping in your own bed right?” “I don’t know about that nugget, I could think of a thing or two I totally would pick over sleeping in my own bed.” “Really like what?” When I see a mischievous smile appear on his face i’m suddenly scared of the answer I’m about to get. “Oh you know..” He falls silent with that same damn smile on his face. When I raise an eyebrow at him he continues; . “You know, Sleeping in a tent at festivals, or just camping with some friends in a beautiful piece of nature or something.” i let out a sigh of relief “oh righttt. Yeah i’m fully on board with all of that.”

Charlie and I talked for another hour while we we’re both laying in our beds. At some point I felt my eyes getting heavier and heavier, and I kept fighting it as hard as I could. I was enjoying this conversation way too much for me to go to sleep now. I totally believed I was hiding it from Charlie as well. I clearly didn’t though..“Hey Y/N?” “Mhhmm?” “You’re about to fall asleep aren’t you?” I’m silent for a while now really almost falling asleep. “Goodnight nugget.” I suddenly hear Charlie say softly. That wakes me back up a bit. “NO!” I clear my throat before continuing “I mean.. no I’m not tired..” “Oh really you’re not tired huh?” Charlie starts to imitate the way I had been acting and reacting the last 20 minutes. “okay okay Fine. Stop it Gillespie. You win, Nighty night Charles.” “night night Y/N. Talk to you again tomo.. well in a few hours,” He gives me one last sweet smile before I close my eyes and I hear Charlie hang up the phone right as I’m about to fall asleep.

Charlie and I kept in contact like that every single day. We didn’t start our day without wishing each other a good morning and refused to go to bed without wishing each other a goodnight and giving each other a virtual hug. During our schooldays we took every free second to text and we made sure to hype each other up when something important had to be done. Late nights were still being made but the few hours of sleep never seemed to bother me. I was basically running on 4 to 5 hours of sleep each day and was doing just fine. i didn’t even come close to feeling tired and was ready to do it all over again the next day. Months passed spending my time just like that..

I had been in contact with all of them on the regular and today i was actually meeting up with Madison who lived somewhat close to me. I was so excited to see her again. We had agreed to meet at a train station and that’s where I was now waiting for her to arrive. Y/N! I hear Madison yell out. I look in the direction the voice was coming from, I see Madison and run up to her to embrace her in a hug. "Madiiiiii! I missed you! How youu doing?" I let go of her and she laughs at me. "How you doin? Charlie, is that you? " Leaving no room for me to defend myself she continues "kidding, I'm great! How are youu giiirl?" while catching up on how life has been we walk to the restaurant where we had made lunch reservations.

“Sooo” Madison said once we were sat at our table. “ Soo.. what?” i asked the girl who was grinning at me. “ Sooo what’s up with you and Charlie?” i give her a confused look.”What do you mean? We’re friends, Mads. You already knew that though..” Madi laughs at me. “ Really Y/N? That’s all you’re giving me? I know you and Charlie have been talking pretty much non-stop..” I can feel the blood flowing to my cheeks when I say “Well yeah, yeah we have. And yes I have enjoyed every minute of that. But that doesn’t mean anything is going on between us. We just get along very well. Besides, he’s still with Emma so I’m sorry to disappoint you but we’re just friends..” Madi just looks at me for a while before a smile spreads on her face.” What?” I ask her. “ You like him.” She simply states with the biggest smile.” What?! Mads I just told you..” I blurt out a little too loud and a little too fast to actually be somewhat convincing.. causing Madison to laugh at me again. “ Girl you soooo do! “

By now I feel like I'm looking like a tomato, bright red, and i don’t even know why. I truly believed I liked Charlie as a friend, nothing more nothing less. Sure he was the sweetest man i had ever met and sure he believed in me like no one had ever done. and yes we had this incredible connection and were on the same wavelength on so many topics. Yes he got me, yes I felt safe enough to fully be myself and fully be honest with him about everything. aaaand yes he was goood looking. But i didn’t like him like that. I Couldn’t. He was with Emma. Me and him were just friends. I would not let myself get a crush on this guy. It would ruin everything. “ Look Mads. I’m not gonna lie. I do miss hanging out with him in real life and Charlie does make me very happy. But i don’t like him like that. He’s just a good friend to me.” Madison clearly was not convinced.”Sure, keep telling yourself that Y/N.”

And I did. In the following weeks I kept telling myself I didn't like him. I just missed him that was all. The more I talked to Charlie and the more the girls teased me about liking him the less I started to believe my own excuses. Untill the day i couldn’t deny it any longer. I totally liked Charlie more than a friend..

- read chapter 4 here

#Charlie gillespie #made by me #written by me #my story #reader #fic #fanfic #fanfiction #Julie and the phantoms #jatp #reader x charlie #charlie x reader #Y/N #Charlie x Y/n #Perfect harmony #Charlie gillespie fic #charlie gillespie story #jatp story #jatp fic

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fanficflaneuse · 4 years

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Dear Draco - Part 1

Part 2 Part 3 Bonus Chapter

Index

A/N: Hello loves, welcome to my new mini series based on an anon request. It will have three parts, four at most. I hope you like this!

Thanks for all the love I received for my birthday. And thanks for reading and letting me know how you feel about my writing.

Details:

Draco x reader (she/her)

Word count: 3146 (I got carried away, sorry).

Summary: In the summer after fourth year, Draco falls in love with a muggle.

Disclaimers: it’s going to get angsty as hell and also very fluffy. Hermione x Draco friendship.

Enjoy!

Hermione sat alone on the library. She was deep in concentration, reading about the Patronus charm for the next DA meeting. All of a sudden, she felt someone looming over her. She closed her book, trying to make it seem as natural as possible. The brown-haired girl looked up, only to find none other than Draco Malfoy himself looming over her. Hermione’s features turned into a nasty scowl.

“Granger,” he tried to sound conciliatory.

“What do you wa –wait, what? Since when do you call me by my last name?”

Only then she realized Draco didn’t look like himself at all. Gone was the haughty attitude, the cocky smirk, the puffed chest. Not to mention the posse. He was no longer an image of confidence, but rather seemed distraught. This piqued the Gryffindor’s curiosity. Still, she was not going to let him see that. These days any slip could be detrimental.

Draco shrugged, hands deep in his robe’s pockets. “It’s your last name, isn’t it?”

Hermione eyed him suspiciously. “Oh, really? So, for five years you’ve thought my last name was mudblood?” she snapped.

Draco winced as she said the hateful label, as though it physically hurt him to hear it. This was the strangest sight she had encountered so far – which was plenty, all things considered.

“Are you okay, Malfoy?” she asked, baffled and cautious.

Draco didn’t answer. Instead, he just rubbed his face with his hands before pulling his hair just slightly. Hermione had never seen him act so natural, so human and, above all, so appalled. Slowly, the ubiquitous paranoia in the back of her mind fogged all of her brain. Her mind started shooting conspiracy theories left and right. As the seconds passed, she thought about every possible way in which Draco could be tending her a trap, which meant he knew something. Hermione got nervous and peered around for someone who could potentially help her. She noted – much to her annoyance – that her tendency to study in the farthest corners of the library had her facing the Slytherin prick on her own.

Draco noticed her discomfort and felt really stupid. He was about to leave, but then he remembered why he approached in the first place. It glued him in his place. So, he just shoved his hands deeper into his pockets and swallowed his pride.

“I…I need your help,” he said sheepishly.

For a second, Hermione thought about making a run for it. But she was far too intrigued now. She definitely wanted to know what could Draco Malfoy possibly need her help for. She stayed still, eyeing him skeptically.

“What is it?”

“Not here,” he said in a hushed voice.

“I’m not going anywhere with you, Malfoy” she huffed.

Draco lowered his gaze. The silence between them was absolutely charged. Hermione’s glare made him feel exposed and ashamed.

“Please.” The sound of his desperation almost convinced the Gryffindor. Almost.

“Harry and Ron must be within hearing range.”

“Not bloody likely,” he snapped.

“Then no,” she said, crossing her arms.

Draco sighed, defeated. “Potter and Weasel-ey can’t know. Nobody can know. Hermione, please I am desperate.”

Hermione looked at him, her eyes wide. He had used her first name for the first time ever. She realized he must have been absolutely desperate. As stupid as seemed, it disarmed her. Hermione took a deep breath. In the worst of cases, Hermione thought, she was more than capable to defend herself from Malfoy. Besides, if he knew something about D.A, it was better to get over with it. She stood up, picked her books and looked at him.

“Where?”

Draco turned on his heel and guided Hermione to moaning Myrtle’s bathroom. She eyed him suspiciously as he motioned for her to get into a stall. He shot her a pout and Hermione rolled her eyes, but entered anyways. She thought she must have been going crazy as she found herself just inches away from Malfoy, who seemed unfazed by the whole affair. He felt so hopeless in his situation he didn’t really care what he had to do at this point.

“So,” she said awkwardly.

Draco didn’t listen. Hermione realized he was casting a silencing charm around them. Only then, did he dare to spill the secret that had been locked in his heart.

“Hermione, I am in love with a muggle.”

As the Hogwarts’ express arrived to platform 9 ¾ after their fourth year, Draco found himself alone. This was a strange occurrence; usually his parents were there to greet him. Their absence hinted something unpleasant, considering the dreary note in which the schoolyear had ended, and suddenly he didn’t feel like apparating back home. Not knowing where else to go, Draco joined the crowd of students heading towards muggle London.

He had never been to the muggle King’s Cross station and he’d be lying to say he wasn’t startled by it. He was mesmerized by the buzzing of the crowd, the smoke coming from the muggle trains, and the elegant simplicity of the station. He was eyeing the entrance curiously, wondering if he should step out or apparate back home, when he bumped into her. Or rather, she collided with him and their trunks were suddenly scattered around.

“Bloody muggles,” he murmured, as he picked his belongings.

“What did you call me?” the girl growled.

“Nothing,” Draco said, startled. He was not used to people talking back to him. The only ones who did were the infamous golden trio, but after five years of bantering he considered it part of his daily routine. Everyone else bowed their heads and carried own with their lives. He was expecting the muggle to follow suit.

She didn’t. So, he softened his scowl to take a good look at her, only to find the most striking girl he had ever seen. Draco was absolutely smitten. She tilted her head, eyeing him curiously.

“You have pretty eyes,” she said casually, as though she was talking about the weather. He felt his face getting hot, his eyes opening in a very unbefitting gesture of surprise. He wondered how she could be so…so easy-going about stuff like that. He had been thought to be suave, but four words of her had beat him.

Draco realized she was waiting for a response. “T-thank you,” he said embarrassedly. He grimaced when he heard her chuckle. The girl tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and stood up, offering a hand for him. Draco looked at the stretched hand for a while and took it just before she let it drop. They were soon shamelessly staring at each other, until a wave of people pushed them.

“Where are you going?” she asked. Draco shrugged in response, not knowing what to say.

“Well…I don’t want to go back home. Would you want to go somewhere with me?”

Draco shoved his hands in his pockets, not knowing what to do. He didn’t want to go back home either. He had an enticing girl in front of him, one that didn’t hesitate to tell him – a stranger – his eyes were pretty and invite him somewhere. But that girl happened to be a mudblood. He shook that thought off his head, realizing, once again, that he was lost in thoughts and the girl was looking at him, waiting for him to answer.

“My name is (y/n),” she said as she pushed her trolley.

“Draco,” he answered, pushing his own trolley, “Draco Malfoy.”

(y/n) giggled, which filled Draco’s stomach with butterflies. “What is it?” Even he could hear the amusement in his voice.

“Was it after the constellation or because it’s Latin for dragon?” she mused.

Draco gave her a small, genuine smile. “Both.”

He soon realized he had no idea where they were going. (y/n) seemed to read his mind, as she explained that they could leave their trunks at a luggage storage while they a stroll through the city. He then noticed that (y/n)’s trolley had trunks, big wooden trunks that resembled his own instead of the ungodly and shabby suitcases he had seen some mudbloods carrying around. He regarded her for a moment as they walked, examining her wardrobe: she wore a carmine coloured skirt, a matching blazer, black tights, black patent loafers and a creamy button-up with a dainty black bow at the collar. Her hair was up in a complicated hair-do. Draco noted that, by her side, he didn’t look particularly out of place in his sweater vest and tie. They could pass as two eccentric, rich kids.

“I gather you’re not from London.” She caught him staring in awe as they left the station, which made him feel self-conscious.

“N-no,” he stammered.

“Where are you from, then?”

“Wiltshire,” he blurted out. Draco realized he must look totally awkward, stuttering every answer as though he never had a conversation in his life. He didn’t know if he was nervous because of her or the fact that he was walking to the unknown with none other than a muggle, but it was totally wrecking his suaveness.

The girl seemed patient enough and smiled at him softly. Maybe it was even out of pity, but he found it adorable. “My grandma lives in Wiltshire. My mother makes me go there every once in a while, but I don’t like it that much.”

“Why?” he asked, genuinely interested.

“It’s a beautiful place, don’t get me wrong. And my grandma’s estate is marvellous, but such a vast house makes the solitude much more…real, you know?” Draco was hanging onto her every word now. She was describing, unabashedly, something he had felt since childhood. He admired her capacity to say this kind of things without the need of closed doors or silencing charms.

“I…I feel just the same,” Draco answered. He was surprised by the idea that him and muggles could have something in common.

(y/n) stopped on her tracks and Draco, who was following her around like a lost puppy, bumped into her back. He was about to apologize when she stopped him. “Given that you’re not from here, let’s do some touristy stuff. We can start here,” she said pointing out the building behind them. It was a grand construction, all in brick of a pinkish colour.

“British library,” Draco mouthed unsure. He noticed how (y/n) blushed slightly and her smile fell a little.

“We could…we could do something else,” she offered a bit ashamed. Draco felt terrible, he wanted her to smile again, to talk to him excitedly as she had done just a couple of seconds before. So, without really thinking about it, he grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the building.

She clasped his hand, an easy smile on his face, and was soon guiding him through rows and rows of muggle books he had never heard before. Draco tried to listen to everything she said. He wanted to remember names and references and look them up to have more things to talk to her about. Draco found himself wanting more conversations with her, more tours through libraries, more recommendations.

(y/n) was an open book. She told him that her parents were divorced. She lived with her mother in Edinburgh. Her father was a professor at LSE – whatever that was. He imagined, by context, it was a muggle Hogwarts.

“I like how you’re unphased by it,” she said.

“What do you mean?” he asked, eyebrow raised.

“Whenever I tell anybody my dad works in LSE, I get a lot of praise. No matter how bigshot the person is, they want the easy way in to the school,” she shrugged. It meant nothing to Draco, who scratched the back of his neck in confusion. (y/n) laughed and carried on, pulling him through different streets with their fingers intertwined.

Draco just let go. He was having so much fun with her, he almost forgot about how weird the situation was. They talked about astronomy and Greek mythology, topics he – thankfully – dominated. They talked about their love for reading and learning. They bonded over the fact that their parents had very high expectations for them and they were top of their classes.

“Top of your class?” asked Hermione, eyebrow raised, as he told her this.

“I’m the second best. She didn’t need to know about you.” For the first time ever, Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy shared a laugh. He then carried on with the most unlikely story ever.

Draco avoided telling her as many details as he could, but they managed to connect over the most universal feelings and situations. They talked about loneliness and pressure, about finding joy in the most unexpected things, about creating a façade for people. When she told him she enjoyed nature, he told her he played “a sport”. He smiled softly and agreed – almost unironically – when she said she would love to fly. When she told him about her pets, he told him his house was full of peacocks.

“She has a dog named Matisse, a snake named Medusa and a cat named Catsby,” he said.

Hermione laughed, which confused Draco deeply. “What’s so funny Granger?” He was getting defensive.

“Catsby,” she said, “what a very nerdy joke.”

Draco furrowed his brow. “Explain it to me. Merlin, maybe for once I can laugh at one of her jokes. She thinks I have the most backward sense of humour,” he ranted, hiding his face in his hands. Hermione thought it was almost – almost – adorable.

She told him in length about The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald and the Lost Generation, because she figured they were some references that would come in handy if he kept talking to (y/n). Once he understood the reference, Draco snorted.

“She’s such a smartass,” he said lovingly.

Hermione couldn’t believe her eyes. She was dying to know what he needed from her, but refrained from asking, allowing him to gush some more.

(y/n) invited him to afternoon tea. The tearoom reminded him of the grandeur of the tea parties back in the manor. He felt comfortable, and ventured to tell her little details about his boarding school. He told her about his favourite places and pastimes – the ones that could pass as muggle, of course. He told her about his friends. They talked and enjoyed tea and pastries until it was very late.

As they picked their trunks, they promised to meet the next day. They spent together almost every day of that summer. He was very careful when sneaking out, but soon realized his parents didn’t notice much, so he had free reign over his time as long as he was back for dinner. They met at the entrance of the station and they would stroll through the city together. (y/n) thought him how to use the tube. She taught him history as they walked hand in hand through museums and libraries. She recommended books he had to read in the middle of the night. And before he could even realize it, Draco caught feelings for her.

They kissed for the first time one month after they first met. They had spent the day walking through Camden Town. They visited little stores and swayed to music in the middle of the street. As every single afternoon, Draco didn’t want to say goodbye. (y/n)’s arms were locked around his neck and his own were on her hips. His chin rested on top of her head and they stayed like that for a while. Not saying anything. She pushed away from him just a little to see his face and they could feel the desire engulfing them.

Draco leaned in first, slow and calculated. (y/n) closed her eyes as soon as she felt their lips touching. It was a delicious sensation, their lips moving in synch in a kiss they had been waiting for a long time. As they pulled away, they were both a bit breathless and absolutely happy.

After that day, things changed for them. Every day they grew more attached to each other and it was harder and harder to say goodbye. And then the last day of August came by. (y/n) gave Draco her contact information for him to write and call her. When she asked for his, though, he made an elaborate story on how his school was very strict and prohibited letters from outsiders. (y/n) hadn’t bought it.

“I don’t get it. What kind of school doesn’t allow you to receive calls and letters?” she said, not very convinced. Draco didn’t want to look her way, knowing very well that he’d give her everything she wished if he saw her adorable little pout.

“So, I won’t hear from you?” she sighed, “Is this true or are you trying to get rid of me?” Draco finally looked her way and his heart broke. (y/n) was trying to hold back tears. He hugged her tightly, protectively.

“Hey, hey,” he said, taking her chin gently with his hand, “Never in a million years would I try to get rid of you.” He wiped away her tears, feeling miserable for making her sad. He hated that she had jumped into that terrible conclusion.

“I promise I will do everything I can to contact you. I’ll find a way. I’ll break the rules,” he said, not a hint of doubt in his voice. (y/n) hugged him tightly.

“I am going to miss you so much,” she said in a small, quavering voice.

“Me too, love,” he answered, hugging her back and trying to remain strong for both of them.

That is why he has here, three weeks into their fifth year, almost begging for Hermione’s help. He was desperate because he hadn’t thought about a way to contact (y/n) and he missed her so much his heart was genuinely aching. He imagined (y/n) must be heartbroken thinking he had played her and that thought alone was enough to give him nightmares.

Hermione was still trying to process everything he was telling her. Still in disbelief, she gave Draco a hug. The Gryffindor felt how he stiffened with her touch, but then he heard him sigh and relax. The Slytherin hugged her back and Hermione’s whole body tinged with hope. If Draco Malfoy had fallen for a muggle, anything could happen now.

“Is this why you didn’t join Umbridge’s squad?” she asked curiously.

Draco shrugged. “Mostly.”

Hermione agreed to help him and they soon found a way. For the rest of the year, Draco handed in (y/n)’s letters to Hermione. She owled them to her own parents and they sent them by Royal Mail to her. Occasionally, Hermione would sit next to Draco in Myrtle’s bathroom. She would explain to him the references he wouldn’t get, which were mostly about culture. At times, she’d stay a little longer and they would gossip. To their surprise, they soon became each other’s confidant.

tags: @cleopatera @okaydraco @naomi02hook @the-hufflefluffwriter

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tinyyoungblood · 4 years

Text

midnight in prague | tom holland

summary: you play MJ in far from home and when filming gets too stressful, you and tom sneak off from set to explore the city of prague at night while also talking about the idea of running away together

pairing: tom holland x actress!reader

word count: 1.9 k

warnings: a bit angsty but mainly fluff, one (1) violent metaphor, language

a/n: i highly recommend listening to the song, it’s absolutely beautiful, sets the mood and inspired this story. used some of the lyrics as dialogue. enjoy!

song/inspo: Canada (ft. Alessia Cara) by Lauv

↳ masterlist

* * *

“That’s a wrap, guys!” The crew cheered weakly, lacking the usual enthusiasm. Not moving from your spot, you meekly pumped your fist in the air in mute joy. To say you were exhausted wasn’t just an understatement, it was a big truck that rammed and then dragged you through the empty streets of Prague. You’ve been up since 9 am and the enormous clock, that had surely become the focal point for everybody, almost signaled three hours after midnight.

Your scene partner was even more drained than you. Tom was barely twitching a limb—only a hollow shell, containing the last remains of his wiped-out energy.

With his head rested on yours, you believed he was dead asleep and lightly poked his side to wake him up. But he only reached out and held your hand in a loose grip, arms dangling between your bodies. “I’m awake,” he murmured, and you were sure he was talking in his sleep.

“Tommy, wake up,” you said gently and wrapped your arms around his torso, letting him engulf you in a warm hug but he didn't budge, “You’re compressing my brain, Tom.”

Slowly, he lifted his head, eyes fluttering open to scan your face but only a second later did he realize that insomnia had caused him to believe your teasing for once. You couldn’t help but pout at the prominent exhaustion on his face. Footsteps on cobblestone and the movement of heavy filming gadgets made up your surroundings but you focused solely on Tom and the guilty look on his face. No words were needed for you to know that he was still sorry for something that he had no control over.

It wasn’t his fault that the weather conditions pushed the night shootings back and it certainly wasn’t his fault that cars were constantly driving over the bridge that you were filming at, forcing you to quickly jump to the side, only to shuffle right back to restart the scene.

But this was Prague and he was Tom. Much like his character, he had thoroughly planned a romantic trip for both of you and after weeks of gushing about it, he was sure he could make it work but something would always come up and push his plans into hopelessness.

At this point, he had accepted his fate but that didn’t mean that he wasn’t sad every time he looked at you and mad every time somebody said “action”. He loved his job and was forever grateful but for fuck’s sake, was it too much to ask for to spend some alone time with his girlfriend?

Just when he was about to open his mouth to apologize to you, you locked his lips with yours and he melted into the kiss, tense shoulders dropping. Releasing his lips with a soft plop, he sighed with a small smile, but his eyes still held sadness. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed that the others were already walking toward the van to drive back to the hotel to fall into a restless sleep, but you couldn’t bring yourself to let Tom go to bed like this.

Your mind flicked to back home where you had naively envisioned your trip to Europe to be completely different—free and without a care in the world. You knew you were here for work, but you didn’t expect to have this many obligations that added to the constant pressure of having to deliver the perfect scenes. The world was counting on you to not fuck this up.

You sighed and looked down at the river. The water reflected the vibrant yellow streetlights and brought you a sense of much-needed peace and tranquillity. Tom watched you curiously as your eyes marveled at the scenery.

Your head whipped back to him and now you were beaming at him, a glimpse of mischief dancing in your eyes. “Let’s get out of here.” Tom blankly stared at you and blinked to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating. “What?”

“I’m saying,” you dragged out and let go of his torso to swing his arms excitedly from side to side, he squeezed your hand, “this is our last night in Prague! We’ve been looking forward to this for the longest time, do you really want to miss it? Come on, we can sleep on the plane tomorrow. Let’s be carefree for once.” Your soul was fueled with sparkling joy and you forgot about your exhaustion. “Let’s be free.”

Tom took a second to contemplate your words before a wide grin broke out on his face and he nodded eagerly, surrendering to bliss. “God, I’m obsessed with your brain sometimes.”

With your hand still in his, you pulled him with you, excitement shimmering. Crossing the Charles Bridge, the two of you slipped away and entered the night you had dreamed of.

Golden lanterns on the side of the houses marked hidden but absolutely breathtaking alleys and for the first time on this trip, it was quiet and serene. Your eyes couldn’t stop darting everywhere, taking it all in with the deepest admiration. It was like you were falling in love with the whole world.

You had a bounce to your step and Tom couldn’t contain his bubbly feelings at the sight of you. He didn’t really understand what switch of yours was suddenly flicked for your spirits to fly this high, but he didn’t need to. He missed spending time with you. Back in the States, both of your schedules were packed and barely allowed a fleeting glimpse but now, the girl of his dreams was buzzing with happiness while the streetlights highlighted her glowing face and he’d be damned if he wouldn’t treasure every moment.

The darkness made the town appear like a secret fairytale village with its colorful houses and narrow passages. Your soft chatter lingered in the warm summer air and every time a giggle left your lips Tom’s heart filled with more love for you, warming him from within. With his adoring gaze, he spun you around. Your dress flying up and you stretched your arms upward, enjoying the carefreeness with a broad smile. You felt like you were floating, feet barely touching the ground as the both of you were dancing to no music.

Drunk with happiness, both of you laughed as Tom pressed your back against a wall. With his hands caressing your hips and your foreheads pressed against each other, your heart throbbed with profound joy, something you haven’t felt in a while.

Adrenaline and happiness consumed you, so much of it that you nearly forgot to breathe but you didn’t need to as Tom’s lips were already on yours. You pushed off the wall, sealing the tiny space between you and he deepened the kiss. Your heart almost broke with joy. Pulling apart, it left you breathless again and you were certain nothing could ever wipe off the stupid grin on your faces.

Arms swinging, the two of you continued your fairytale walk and ended up at the Charles bridge again where you had started off the night. Still high on emotions, Tom pulled you with him as he swung his legs over the rim of the bridge and gestured for you to follow. You didn’t hesitate and sat next to him, legs dangling over the river. You rested your head on his shoulder and his arm wrapped around your small frame as you overlooked the sight in front of you.

Your voice was delicate as you spoke, cautioning into the silence, “I really needed this. It's almost like I've been stuck at home forever.” Tom was playing with strands of your hair and you knew he was deep in thoughts.

Again, you watched the dancing streetlights reflection on the water surface but this time it didn’t bring you peace. You had your night and that was all you wanted. So why did you feel a pinch of sadness at the simple thought of heading to the hotel, settling into your bed and calling it a night. You didn’t want this night to end and you knew Tom also dreaded having to end this feeling.

So the question he asked next wasn’t a surprise to you in the slightest—it resonated with you.

“What if we move to Canada?”

He sounded hopeful. Musing about taking on the world in a different way than you both already did but he knew you two were in no position to be bold and just not give a damn. It was neither in his nor your power to be selfish. A sudden breeze left goosebumps on your exposed skin, but he dreamingly gazed at you with vulnerable eyes and you let yourself dream with him.

“We could bring Tessa,” you voiced, and the corner of his mouth quirked up. “And your paintbrush and some candy,” Tom added, and awe transformed your face, eyes lighting up.

“I guess we’re lucky that we don’t need much outside of us, do we?” You chuckled softly and he shook his head with a sad smile on his face. He took your hand in his and started to play with your fingers, eyes looking heavenward. For the first time tonight, you noticed the endless stars sparkling from above.

“You know, when we film those movies...” He licked his lips and your gaze darted to his hesitant face. You weren’t sure if tears were brimming his eyes or if they reflected the deep water but they were glistening and you squeezed his hand to remind him that you were there. “...When they talk about those people in the movies who up and leave, I always think about how that could be us.”

He looked down at you, hands tightening around yours and now you were sure those were tears shimmering in his eyes. “That could be you and me.”

You didn’t answer and he didn’t need you to.

Both of you knew this wasn’t the heat of the moment talking. ‘Let’s get away from here and do our own thing’ wasn’t an option for any of you. Your thing was acting, you loved it from the bottom of your heart, and you wouldn’t be completed without that passion in your life and Tom—Tom was Spider-Man. Arguably one of the most recognizable cinematic characters in the world. Besides the fact that he couldn’t just quit, he didn’t want to either.

This was the life that you both chose. Unforgettable memories, unconditional support and overwhelming opportunities. There were also hours of press tours, draining interviews and nerve-wracking red carpets.

Your heart rate picked up at the single thought of it all but if tonight had taught you anything, it had taught you something deeply beautiful. Amid the chaos and pressure, amid the glamour and blessings, all you needed in the end was Tom by your side. He was the reason why you soared your highest heights and he was your support system when you plunged to the deepest depths. Gratitude flowed through you.

Leaning forward, you pressed a soft kiss on his cheek, letting it linger for a moment before you nuzzled your head back into the crook of his neck—brown eyes never leaving you. He returned the gesture by leaving a gentle kiss on top of your head, before resting his own on yours, pressing you closer into his body with a content sigh.

We are lucky that we don't need much outside of us.

* * *

wrote this at 5 am so it might be extra cheesy but i’m still too sleep-deprived to tell lol. i appreciate the hell out of feedback so feel free to leave me some and if you don’t, that’s okay too. thank u for reading, buh-bye! x

masterlist

#tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x actress!reader #tom holland one shot #tom holland imagine #tom holland fluff #actress!reader #tom holland x actress #tom holland x yn #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland fic #tom holland #tom holland x reader fluff

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littlekatleaf · 3 years

Text

The shape that I'm in now

(It's 1 am, I must be posting Roadrat snz fic. This takes place in the same 'verse as 'Buried in a burning flame' and 'My heart as spent as ashes, but takes place before them. Not that it's necessary for the story, just to orient.)

Whatever here that’s left of me Is yours just as it was ~ Hozier, As It Was

Junkrat rolled over, trying to ease the ache in his hip, but it didn’t help. Sheets scratchy on oversensitive skin. Eyes hot, dryer than the fuckin’ desert, nose running like to make up for it. Flipped the pillow, but both sides were already too warm. Everything hurt, from toenails to eyelids. Even his fucking missing limbs hurt, however the hell that worked. What sucked the most, though was the silence. It pulsed against his eardrums, buzzed in his head.

Had told Roadhog to go. No choice about it. Bones’d been aching with impending fever, head felt packed with sand. Knew what was coming and didn’t want Roadhog to see. Didn’t want to be seen. Not when felt like his skin was peeled back, leaving all of his quivering insides bare. Being sick was being vulnerable. In Junkertown being vulnerable meant you was good as dead.

Felt Roadhog watching him from the first handful of sneezes. “Nobody fuckin’ cleans this shithole,” Junkrat had grumbled, trying to play it off. Roadhog said nothing.

Didn’t say a word when Junkrat blamed the spices in the stir fry for the second fit.

Unfortunately the third handful of sneezes seemed to have blown all thoughts from his brain and he was still trying to recover when Roadhog asked, “All right, Rat?”

“‘M fine. If you want to get in my pants just say so.” Might have intended it to sound flirty but it came off pissy.

Roadhog crossed his arms over his chest. “Ain’t like that. You just look…” “Ain’t neither of us winning a beauty pageant, Hog. Mind your business.” Least that time sounded like maybe he could be joking, even with the edge in his voice.

Tried to bite the sneezes back after that. Pinch them off. Smother them in his sleeve. But every single time he felt Roadhog’s eyes on him, watching. Made the hairs raise at his nape and finally he snapped, shouting at Roadhog to get the fuck out and leave him alone.

Roadie had, and he was fine with it. Just perfectly fuckin’ apples, mate. Went to bed, tried to sleep it off. But couldn’t. Now he tossed back the sheets, pushed himself up, buckled on his prosthetics. Make himself tea. Caffeine might dull the headache. Heat’d feel good on his throat.

You wanted to be by yourself... teasing whisper of her voice through the buzzing. You told him to go. You should be happy - here all alone with your disease. Could practically feel her breath at his ear and he swayed for a minute, dizzy. He doesn’t want to be anywhere near you.

“Shows what you know. Roadhog likes it when I sneeze.” Hated how defensive it sounded. Proof that he was only good for one thing.

Perhaps, but this is beyond even his depravity. Look at yourself, Jamison.

Without really meaning to, his gaze flicked over to the mirror that hung above the washbasin, then away again. Not before he’d seen himself though - scarecrow hair, singed in more places than he’d realized, skin and bones, dark circles around his eyes, nose red, lips cracked from breathing through his mouth. Expression going blank as the need to sneeze came over him. “Huh-R’iiishh! Isshew! R’iishew!” Managed to catch them in a tissue at the last minute, but it was a close thing.

Disgusting. And weak. I absolutely cannot fathom why he has not left you behind yet. Ill so often. Missing half your limbs. In need of protection. What kind of man are you?

“Shut it,” he said. Much as hated to admit it, she was right. Knew full well all the ways he was lacking. Rubbed his dripping nose on a handful of tissues.

Perhaps he just enjoys toying with you. Drawing things out before he takes your treasure and returns to the Queen. Her tone is a purr. A predator does love to tease its prey.

“Roadhog ain’t the Queen’s. Not anymore.”

No? He told you that, did he?

“Yes.” Sort of. What had Roadhog said when they met? Freelance? What did that mean? He wouldn’t… would he? If he got pissed off enough? If Junkrat was enough of a pain in the ass? A sudden chill whipped through him and he shivered. Grabbed a windcheater off the hook on the back of the door and yanked it over his head. Roadie’s, he realized as the soft cotton engulfed him. At least he was warm. Tugged the hood up over his head. Maybe that would block out her voice.

Pathetic… The whisper echoed in his ears, then faded - taking his energy with it. Giving up on the tea plan he curled up in a corner of the couch. Pulled in his knees, tugged the windcheater down over him and tried to disappear. Just needed to get smaller. Smaller.

A sneeze jag shook him awake. Took him a second to catch his breath and open his eyes. There was Roadie, holding out a tissue. Didn’t want to take it, but the alternative was worse. And messier. “Thanks,” he said, stuffiness blurring the consonants. Blowing his nose helped, but only a little.

Roadhog didn’t say anything, just turned on his heel and disappeared into the kitchen. Kettle rattled, water hit the basin. Click snap of the flame catching on the stove. Clink of spoon against mug.

Apologize, Jamison. Unless you want to test his patience even further.

Don’t need your input, he said, but only in his head. Always weirded Roadhog out when he answered aloud. Cleared his throat, attempted to pitch his voice loud enough to carry, even though felt like he’d been swallowing sandpaper in his sleep. “Oi, Roadie?”

Nothing. Sighing to himself, Junkrat untangled his limbs, ignoring the shivering. Maybe Roadhog wouldn’t notice. Managed to reach the kitchen this time. Roadhog’s back was turned, head slightly bent over whatever he was doing.

Rat hesitated in the doorway. While his mouth usually moved faster than his brain, at the moment neither seemed to be online. He leaned against the jamb, waiting for inspiration to strike. Instead he sneezed, catching them in his sleeve, then coughing after. “Ugh, fuck. I’ll wash this I swear.”

“...” The skepticism was clear even without words.

“Ain’t gonna forget this time.”

“...”

Junkrat coughed a laugh. “Yeah, you’re right I probably will.” Rubbed the back of his neck where it ached. “Roadie, I’m…” sorry he was going to say but Roadhog turned, offering a steaming mug.

“I know. Drink.”

Couldn’t smell anything through his clogged nose so he sipped warily. Then sighed, relief and gratitude. “Where the hell’d you find Lemsip?”

“Bobby had some.”

“An’ he just gave it to you?” Meds were hard to come by, even stupid shit like cold medicine.

Roadhog shrugged. “He owed me somewhat.”

The steam made his nose run and tickle and he sniffled a little. Which only served to trigger another round of sneezes and he slopped hot liquid over his hand. “Ow, god fucking dammit.”

“Here, let me…” Roadhog reached for his hand, but he stepped back.

“No, it’s fine.”

“Rat. I said let me.”

The darkness of his tone sent a shiver down Rat’s spine. The command in it was as unmistakable as the warmth. Junkrat stopped, pinned, barely breathing. Roadhog wiped his hand, carefully, like the burn could have been serious. Then he laid a palm over Rat’s forehead, fingers pleasantly cool. Junkrat leaned into the touch.

“Really got a fever, don’t you.”

It wasn’t a question, exactly but Junkrat nodded anyway. “Feelin’ shit, to be honest.” A hot flush chased the chills. Had to tell Roadie the truth, but didn’t make it any easier.

“You hurting?”

Rat shrugged, nodded again.

“Come on,” Roadhog put an arm around him, led him back into the bedroom. “Lie down.”

“Ain’t tired,” he tried. Not quite enough energy to be a proper brat.

“Not planning on sleep. Lie down.”

Junkrat did as he was told, but closed his eyes as the bed dipped and Roadhog sat down beside him. With gentle fingers he disconnected Junkrat’s prosthetics and set them aside. Even though he’d only been wearing them a short time, they’d already rubbed sore spots on his skin. Roadhog knew to avoid those places as he began to massage the muscles in Rat’s forearm, kneading until the knots loosened, then moved on to Rat’s thigh.

As the tension drained away, Rat sighed so deep was almost a groan. “God, that’s good.” Roadhog let go of him, but didn’t move away. There was the soft sound of a jar being opened and a teasing scent of menthol that Rat could smell even through the congestion. Vicks, of course. “For the cough,” he asked, smirking.

“It’ll help,” Roadhog said, but this time Rat knew it was a question. Making sure he was okay with it.

“It will,” Rat agreed. Put him back on easier footing. Hog gave him a little care, he’d get Hog off. Fair and square.

Roadie slid his hands up under the windcheater and goosebumps rose in the wake of his touch. Junkrat’s back arched, “Oh,” he breathed. “It’s so… Itchew! Huh-Itchh! Itchhuh!” Luckily he’d pulled the sleeves over his hand because he covered just with his hand before realizing.

“Bless you,” Roadhog said, without pausing from the massage.

“Th...thank y-Ihchuuh! Ah’tchh! Chh!” The sensations together were almost overwhelming. Felt like he was tingling along every nerve, shivering with both chills and desire, surprised to find himself going hard, even as he kept sneezing.

“You blushing, or is that the fever?” Roadhog’s voice a rumble in his ear and even that made a shudder run through him.

“Both,” he sighed. Nothing he could do about it, body betraying him with every sneeze.

Roadie chuckles. “You do that so well.”

“Wh… Huhitch!... Itch! Ishhew! … what?"

“Lose control.” An answer but also a command as he tugged Rat’s boxers down and slid inside, surprisingly gently.

“Oh…” Words gone. Thoughts gone. Only feeling left. Heat, fever, want, like fire in his blood. Waves of trembling over him. Hog deep inside, moving with a gentle but implacable rhythm, driving him higher, stoking the flames. He clenched his mech hand in the sheets, clung to Hog with his flesh hand, fingers tightening convulsively. And as the flames built so, too, did the need to sneeze. Little panting breath, interrupted by sniffles and teasing hitches.

“Lose it, Rat,” Roadhog said.

“Ah’Rrrishhah! Ushhew! Isshah!” The flames engulfed him, he shook with release. For a long, long moment he could only blink blearily at the ceiling, utterly spent. “Holy shit,” he managed, finally.

At some point Roadie’d gotten a cool washcloth and he wiped it carefully over Rat, washing away sweat and the vaporub. Just when the cold was about to set him shivering, Roadhog pulled a blanket over him, then leaned down and kissed his forehead. “You did good, Rat.”

A burst of warmth flowered in his chest and tears sprang up. Rat blinked them back, scrubbed his face with his hand. “‘M a fucking mess,” he said.

“...”

“I mean, sure we have fun. But look at me.” Waved a hand over himself. “Missing a piece or two. Fuckin’ sick all the time. Maybe we should just… go our own ways.”

“...”

“Got enough of a haul to make up for the fight in the bar. Enough to make this bodyguard gig thing worthwhile. We should maybe quit while we’re ahead.” Before you get tired of me, he didn’t say, but it was there on his tongue.

“Rat.” Clink of buckles as Roadhog took off his mask.

Junkrat resisted the urge to look at him. Didn’t want to read the truth of his feelings in his eyes.

“Look at me.”

He does, for a second, then away again.

“You see the scars. All of them. You think they make me ugly?”

“No!” Surprise had him actually meeting Roadhog’s gaze. Caught, he couldn't look away. “Just part of who ya are.” He reached up and traced one from the corner of Roadie’s eye, curving down and along his jaw. No, the scars had surprised him at first, but never bothered him.

“Need the hogdrogen. The mask. So I’m weak?”

“Course not.” First person to mistake Hog for weak wouldn’t live to regret it.

“This place tried to kill us. In so many ways. But it fucking hasn’t. Don’t let it win, Jamie. Don’t let it.”

Junkrat swallowed hard. Nobody called him that, not for years and years. “I won’t,” he said.

Roadhog lay next to him and Junkrat curled into him. Roadhog pulled him closer, carded his fingers through Rat’s hair. “Sleep, Jamie.”

I’m yours, he thought as he drifted away. Whatever’s left of me.

#snezfic #oversnez #constitutionally incapable of writing shortfic #did not go the way I expected

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tyunniverse · 4 years

Text

Midnight Crisis

pairing: huening kai x reader

genre: fluff (?)

word count: 1728

synopsis: huening kai gets woken up by his neighbor's alarm every midnight and finally decides to do something about it

There it is again.

Kai lies awake in his bed, eyes heavy and dark circles evident. He stares at the ceiling, trying his best to cancel out the noise that's been plaguing his mind for countless nights but to no avail. He's grown to hate the noise with each passing day. It's been like this ever since he moved in two months ago.

The first night was bearable, he'd assumed that his neighbor had something important to do at midnight. After all, it wasn't unusual for a college student to be up that late to finish an assignment. The first week was excusable. Kai figured that they must be working on an extremely important project that couldn't wait until morning to be finish. The next few weeks were hell. He thought he'd be immune to the alarm blasting through his walls but he wasn't. It sounds off for five minutes and after that, waits another five minutes more to go off again. His suffering doesn't end until it nears 1 am, and if he's lucky, it'll end before 00:30. This became the norm for Kai.

But the alarm had been going off for more than an hour. A hundred thoughts go through Kai's mind. Should he just try to go back to sleep? At this point that seemed impossible. He'd tried a hundred times before and it never worked. Should he just stay up until it ends? He'd be tired by morning but that's the safest possible decision. But what if this goes on until sunrise? He can't risk falling asleep in class when he had a presentation first thing in the morning.

Kai bunches the his blanket in his hands. "Why me?" He groans, shifting to the side to check his phone. His classmate, Beomgyu, had left him a message a few hours ago.

Hyuka, I can't make it to class tomorrow. I'm at the hospital with my roommate. Sorry, but I think you have to do the presentation on your own tomorrow. I promise I'll make it up to you.

Great.

Given the news and the loud pinging of the alarm, Kai decides that he has had enough. He can't deal with the stupid alarm going off every night, especially when he really needed the rest.

He hops out off bed, grabbing a hoodie from his closet and putting it over his shirt before storming out of his room.

—

You were beyond tired.

The classes you had on that day had all conducted tests, leaving your brain fried by the time you got home. You immediately pass out once you reached the comfort of your bed, not even caring to change out of your clothes. Your mind peacefully drifts into sleep, remembering that you had something to look forward to at 1 am.

You never forget to set your alarm. Sometimes, it was hard waking up in the middle of the night when you're having such a good time sleeping, but you made sure that it went off every five minutes until you're forcibly awoken by it's blaring sound.

The drama your best friend, Soobin, had recommended to you had been the highlight of your day since the beginning of the semester. School has been nothing but the source of your stress and you found that watching the new episodes every night helped you get through it and prepare yourself for anything to come. Little did you know that your energy booster had become the bane of someone else's existence.

"Excuse me!"

You were woken up by the sound of loud banging on your door. Having just come to your senses, your eyes wander to you phone that had been blasting your alarm since 12 am. You reach out to it, checking the time and panicking once you saw that it was way past the time slot for your drama. It was about to finish.

"Shit." You scramble towards your laptop, hoping to at least see if there was still hope to watch it until your attention was brought back to the loud banging on your door.

"Excuse me! Is anyone in there?"

You frown. "Who the hell disturbs people in the middle of the night?"

The place was quiet for a while until the banging came back. You take one last glance at your laptop before treading towards the door. You grab anything heavy along the way in case things get a little weird with your unexpected visitor.

Kai rubs his eyes as he waits for his neighbor's door to swing open. His ears perk up when he hears shuffling behind the door. It opens for about an inch wide, raising a few questions in Kai's mind.

"Do you need something?" You speak out from behind the door.

Kai's brows knit as he leaned a little closer. "It's me, Huening Kai, from room 208. I need to talk to you about something but isn't refusing to open your door a little rude?"

"Oh, sorry." You relax once you realize that the visitor wasn't a threat. You'd seen him a lot on your way to your room but you've never interacted before. All you know was that he seemed like a pretty nice guy. "Ah," You look up at him. He looked kinda cute despite his tired look. His messy hair had almost entirely covered his eyes and his hoodie had a molang print on the side. "But isn't it also a little rude to bang at your neighbor's door at 1 am?" You ask him, brows raised.

Kai purses his lips, trying his best to hold off on snapping at you. He was truly at his limit. "Not when that neighbor has kept me up for the past two months with their stupid alarm?"

"What are you— oh." You cut yourself off upon realizing the entirety of the situation. Maximum volume. You had set your alarm at maximum volume to make sure you never missed an episode. It had barely been effective on you but it sure did its work on your neighbor. In hindsight, you should've seen this coming.

Kai watches as you space out and decides to just tell you then and there instead of waiting for you to invite him inside. "Uh, listen." His hands fidget, trying to get through the awkwardness. "You must have something important to do but please be responsible with your alarm. It's ringing has kept me awake since the start of the semester and I haven't gotten a good night's sleep since. I have a presentation later and I really need to get some sleep before that, so can you please tone the alarm down or just shut if off? I don't think I can survive another night like this."

There he had it.

Kai felt a bit better. He should've done this sooner. His problems would've been solved by then. He figured that you'd apologize and stop your alarms since by now, the two of you have probably reached an understanding.

"I understand your side, I really do." You tell him, looking up at his now smiling form. "But I can't lower the volume." His smile disappears.

"What?"

"I can't wake up if it's not at maximum volume. Please understand, I need this in order to wake up." You insist.

Kai didn't know how to react. He'd been so sure that you'd cooperate that any other responses would have rendered his mind blank. "What?" He repeats. "Then, can you at least tell me why it's so important for you to be awake at this hour?"

You cant. You can't tell him.

The moment he finds out that you were willing to sacrifice his sleep for the drama you've been watching, he'd never let you hear the end of it. "I have a project and it needs to be finished by tomorrow."

Kai crosses his arms, frowning. "So you're saying you have an important project every single night?"

You hold your breath. "Yes?"

"Yes?" Kai scoffs. "Please tell me you're joking."

"I'm serious!" You wage him off. "I really do have one!"

Kai takes a peek at your room and sighs. "Then bring it here. The least you can do is prove that you're telling the truth. I can't keep suffering like this, Y/N."

Hearing your name made you nervous. Of course he'd known your name, he had delivered your packages a few times when it ended up in front of his doorstep by mistake. What's worse, he wanted you to show him the project you made up on the spot to hopefully escape the situation. Your mind goes blank, and there's only one thng that passes through it despite being fully aware that this solution was only temporary.

"I'm sorry!"

"Huh?"

Kai freezes in his spot as the door slams shut in his face. He hears you run back imto the safety of your room and he's left standing there, speechless. It takes him a few seconds to register what had just happened.

"Hey!" He reaches out for your door knob, twisting it a few times before giving up and knocking on the door. "Y/N? Y/N! Open up! We're still not done talking!" He knocks a few more times. "Hey!"

You snicker, hellbent on ignoring him and focusing on what's left of your show. Even if it's just the ending of the episode, it was enough to at least get you through tomorrow.

The episodes starts loading after a few clicks and you move to get your headphones. That's when you realize that Kai had finally stopped bothering you for the night. A smile creeps in your face as you feel a mixture of relief and guilt. "I'm sorry, Kai, but I need this."

You plug your headphones in and was about to focus on the episode when a loud alarm starts blasting through the walls of your room. Eyes wide, you check your phone to see if your alarm had beem turned off. It had been dead ever since you got up, which meant that the sound could only be coming from the room next door.

You jump when you hear a rather loud laugh coming from Kai's room, followed by him banging on your shared wall. Your phone buzzes with a notification and you check it.

Hey there, neighbor! If I'm not gonna get any sleep then so are you. Suffer with me >3<

#txt imagines #txt x reader #txt imagine #huening kai imagines #huening kai x reader #huening kai fluff

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undercoverclover · 3 years

Text

No Matter Where

Part 3

Genre: Fluff?

Pairing: Chan x Original Character

Warning: N/A

Part 1, 2

Summary: Liliana’s vacation with her 2 best friends ends up being a trip to remember.

We were so tired from jet lag that after dinner we went back to the hotel. "I'm ready for bed." Ria said stretching. "Same, I think we can go out tomorrow night. Let's crawl in the beds, watch a movie and go to sleep." Anya suggested.

"We could, I'm really tired now though." I say through a yawn.

"But, I'll attempt to watch a movie."

"Great! I'll make popcorn!" Ria said, smiling and getting up.

"Don't make me any, I probably won't eat any." I didn't want to think about eating right now.

After waiting for an answer and holding out long enough to watch the movie, or attempt to, I passed out right as the ending credits began to roll.

*Buzz Buzz Buzz*

I kept hearing some weird noise.

*Buzz Buzz Buzz*

I look for the phone and answer still half asleep,

1:26 a.m.

"Hello?" I mumble.

"Hello? Liliana?" Yuchan replies.

It takes a minute for my brain to realize and my eyes fly open, remembering I didn't have MY phone.

"Oh! Shi-.. Hello, hi Yuchan"

"Sorry, were you asleep?"

"I was, but that's okay."

"I'm deeply sorry, I just now got out of practice. I didn't realize what had happened. I normally shut my phone off then."

"That's okay. By chance, what's the time?" I ask not wanting to hit the bright light on the phone. Ria stirs and I try to talk quieter.

"Oh, um. It's 1:27 a.m. Sorry I guess this could have waited til morning."

My mouth dropped open for lack of something to say

"Oh.. it- that's okay." I manage to finally say. "So are you wanting to switch back phones soon?" I ask, making my heart skip.

"Yeah, I kinda need to." He mutters.

"Okay, when? In the morning?" I suggest.

"Hmm, no not in the morning. Not since it's so late already and I'm just now headed home. How about tomorrow afternoon?"

"Mmm, I think I told the girls I'd take them to lunch. It's my turn to pay." I groan realizing it is in fact my turn to pay.

He laughs at me and I smile.

I love his laugh so much.

"Hmm okay." He finally answers, still smiling, "We will figure it out."

"Sounds good." I say smiling back.

Then realization dawns on me. "What are you doing tomorrow night?" I ask.

What gave you the nerve to ask?! Shut up Liliana. Don't you dare keep it going.

"I have practice, but I'm sure since this is kind of important, I can leave early. What's up?"

"Um, well." And then I hear a click. "Hello?" I say.

Well fudge… I guess my phone died? I put his phone on charge when I was about to go to sleep. He just now turned my almost dead phone on.

"Oops."

I ended up pulling up Kakao again to message him, well me?

Me: Liliana, again. Sorry for killing my phone before this happened.

Liliana, what are you doing? I erased the message and started again.

I have to go out tomorrow night with the girls, but if you want to I can let you know where I am and we can switch phones back then. I hit send.

Short and to the point. Good enough.

I lay on my back and stare at the ceiling.

How am I supposed to sleep now? I’m wide awake.

It’s been like 2 conversations and a day. I’ll only be here a week. Quit going through the motions woman.

I drift off to sleep sometime later.

“Liliana, wake up.” Ria said as she threw a pillow at me.

“I don’t wanna,” I turn over, “It’s too early for life.”

“It’s like 10 a.m. get up!” She says as she comes over and starts bouncing on my bed.

“I got woken up at 1 okay, give me like, 10 more minutes.” I grumble and pull the blanket over my head.

“By who? What’d you do, sneak out? You gotta give me details!” She asks almost too excitedly.

“No, I did not sneak out. Yuchan called me after he got out of practice and finally turned my phone on.” I sat up and faced her. “Why are you like this?” I ask as I stare at her.

She shrugged and smiled like she had no idea what I was talking about.

“Then my phone died before we got a chance to decide on how to switch back phones today. I messaged him, but I haven’t checked it since I just woke up.”

Trying to hide anything from either of them was nearly impossible. Being best friends and roommates for close to two years does that to you.

You’d think she chose to believe me… I don’t think she wanted to though.

“What are you two doing in here? Can we please hurry up and go get some actual breakfast?” Anya said, coming out of the bathroom and seeing she had changed out of her pajamas.

“I guess we better. We have a long few days ahead.” Ria said happily.

I swear if I’d come by myself this wouldn’t have happened. But, if I had, I wouldn’t have been with the two people who’ve been by me through everything lately.

****

12:31 p.m.

*Buzz Buzz*

Yuchan: Hello Liliana, I think we could work it out so I can come and get my phone from you tonight. Is that still okay?

Me: Yes, I mean as long as I can have my phone back too… :)

Yc: Of course! Haha sorry, so we can return each other’s phones. Does that sound more appropriate? XD

Me: Sounds much better, thank you. >.<

Yc: Okay, what time should I meet you? I should get out of practice around 8 p.m.

Me: Mmm I think we are headed to the club about 10 tonight? So, if you want to meet right before then, that would be awesome.

Yc: Deal. See you tonight, Liliana.

I sent back a smile, letting him know I agreed and I'd see him tonight.

I was actually kind of nervous and I shouldn't be.

8:09 p.m.

“Are you ready Lili?” Anya asks, knocking on the bathroom door.

“Just about, I have like 4 more pieces of my hair left to straighten. I say just as I finish up my hair."

"Okay, just waiting on you." She says and walks away.

I walk out of the bathroom 5 minutes later, ready to go.

"You're going in that?" Ria asked and Anya looked back at me, half in a pose to put her shoes on.

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" I ask, completely confused.

I had on skinny jeans and a cute black and red sweater. That plus my straight hair pulled halfway up, I thought I looked cute.

"There's nothing wrong with it, if you're planning on going to the coffee shop."

Oh geez. I'm about to get a makeover, aren't I?

"My twin, you know me better than that." Ria smirks and gets up to go over to my clothes I'd brought.

"Ria, we don't have time for this if we want to be there at 10." I say, hoping she won't realize I'm pushing to leave.

*BUZZ BUZZ* I go to take the phone out of my pocket.

"Put that away for a moment. It's not like you're going to give it back until one of us messages him for you." Ria says, coming to drag me over to the bed.

Little did she know, I already had…

She looks at me dumbfounded, "Where are all of your dressy clothes?"

"Do I look like I own dressy?" I state.

"You do too! I've bought you some!" She says, her voice going up an octave...or 3.

"Ria? I didn't pack them."

"Liliana May!" She puts her hands on her hips and stares at me.

"What did I do now?" I say and put my hand over my eyes.

Maybe I'll disappear and she will go away.

"Listen miss thing. It's been 3 years since you cut the dumbass loose. THREE. You need to get out there and have fun. Even if you don't find someone right now, you can enjoy yourself while he takes his slow ass time getting to you." She throws every word at me so they stick.

She doesn't say it hatefully, but she knows how to say it, so my brain will stop overthinking.

"I- '' I start to say something before she jumps back in.

"No but about it. You're having fun." She walks over to her suitcase and sets it on the bed.

I think Anya has left until I look over and her hand is over her mouth while she's watching to see who will come unglued first. I think she was more shocked that I hadn't said anything about my wardrobe.

"I will have fun, in what I'm wearing." I say and cross my arms.

"This is one time woman. I swear to God, I WILL throw soda all over that outfit so you'll have to change." She looks daggers through me.

Okay, so no need to argue today over a stupid outfit.

"One time Ria. ONE!" I say strictly. She claps and pulls out a black, short dress. The dress was gorgeous, the bottom was short, but there was a 2 inch piece of black lace that went past the hem. It wasn't spaghetti straps either, it was elegant lace straps kind of like Cinderella's but not poofy. Realization dawned on me. And it was not in Ria's size. She smiled from ear to ear and I've never seen her so happy.

"Wait a damn minute." I say grabbing the dress and looking at the size.

It wasn't hers like I'd thought. It was mine.

"So, you knew? You knew I wouldn't pack anything too dressy." I glare and I glare hard.

I hear Anya cackling over in her seat and quick glare at her too. She clamps her hands over her mouth still trying to suppress her laugh.

She smiles and tilts her head.

"Of course I knew! You are my twin!"

"UGH! Oh my G-God! Wa- why?" I say, stuttering.

*I've stuttered ever since I can remember. I have to really think about what I'm saying in order to not stutter.*

"Because you've lost so much weight and worked so hard to make yourself happy. You look great despite what you think!" Ria says.

"I second this!!" Anya yells in.

"Dammit guys!" I say defeated. I couldn't argue with them. I'd lose.

I don't feel like I'm pretty or beautiful or even remotely good looking, but they always try to tell me that I don't see the real me.

So for once. I gave up.

"I'll try. One night. But, I'm taking extra clothes and I'm taking my jacket." I say looking at them and judging.

"Yay! Yay yay yay!" Ria says jumping up and down.

I quickly went back into the bathroom and changed. Feeling so uncomfortable but decided I'd take one, just to make them happy that I'm trying.

After our back and forth, we got our shoes on and headed out to meet the taxi.

"The temperature outside is perfect spring weather! I wish it would come back to the states with us." I say as we open the door to the car waiting and pile in.

#a.c.e chan #kang yuchan #acewriters

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hermionemonica · 3 years

Text

The Road to Us, and Everything in Between: Chapter 5

(This is a no magic AU. There is no existence of the Miraculous or the superheroes in this universe.)

AO3 | Chapter 1 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 6

As the days passed, Marinette began to find it harder and harder to function properly in front of Adrien. She would get all blushy and stumble over her words. When Adrien looked at her, she lost the ability to think. And it was frustrating her. Why couldn't she just act like a normal human being? Adrien was her friend after all!

Adrien was incredibly understanding though. He did not get annoyed at all when Marinette took time to form coherent sentences around him. He didn't laugh at her when she bumped into stuff because she was staring at him. He only smiled softly and looked at her like she was some precious thing, and that was only making it worse!

One day, Marinette passed by some girls of the Business department gossiping in the cafeteria. Usually, she kept her distance from such crowds, but this time she stopped.

Because she heard Adrien's name.

“Hadn't you noticed? Adrien is head over heels for her!”

“Of course!”

“I want to say I'm jealous, but I'm low-key shipping them. Have you seen how cute they look together?”

“We should have guessed given how much time they spend together.”

Adrien... and a girl? Was it... was it her? After all, she hadn't seen Adrien hang out with any other girl in the university.

Should she talk to those girls? She wasn't very close with them, but it was okay to swoop in because she heard them talking about someone she knew? Someone who apparently was “head over heels for her"

In a rush of adrenaline, Marinette decided to take the risk.

“Hi,” she began nervously, as she approached the girls. “I thought I heard you talking about Adrien?”

“Oh, Marinette is here! You’d know everything about it, right?”

That was nowhere close to “We were only talking about you!”, which was the kind of reaction Marinette was expecting.

“Hmm? What are you talking about?”

“Adrien's girlfriend Chloe, of course!”

Wait, Chloe? That's not what her name was! Who were they talking about then? What was going on?

“I'm sorry, what was that?”

“C'mon Marinette, don't be a spoilsport! You are like the person who is closest to Adrien in the entire university! Who would know the inner details better? And you can trust us, we won't tell anyone...”

Marinette had stopped listening. She stood frozen in her place. Adrien... he was dating someone else?

She felt something tighten painfully in her chest, and breathing was suddenly not as easy as it used to be. She quickly excused herself and ran to the bathroom. The noises of the cafeteria were making her nauseous. She had barely managed to shut the door behind herself when her knees buckled underneath her, and she dropped to her floor. The walls were spinning around her. The buzzing in her head began to grow louder and louder, and she clutched her head in agony.

Marinette did not know how long she stayed there. Maybe an hour, maybe more. When the heaviness in her limbs subsided, she got up and dragged herself outside the building, into the university compound. She needed the quiet and fresh air to clear her head. She sat on one of the benches for a while, trying to control her breathing. She was actively trying to block out the thoughts that had brought about the attack, and she had grown used to doing that for a while. That helped. It had been a while since her last anxiety attack, and she had been doing pretty alright recently. That's why she had neglected to keep her meds in her bag.

After a while, she went home. She couldn't take the risk of staying in class that day, and she could afford to take the day off.

When Marinette opened the door to the bakery, her parents looked up from what they were doing, but with a glance at her face, they understood what was wrong. Her mother put the tray of macaroons that she was carrying on the counter, and rushed to support her daughter. She helped Marinette walk up the stairs to her room. Marinette took the medicines, and then her mother tucked her in bed. The exhaustion and the action of the medicine took effect quickly, and soon she drifted off into a dreamless slumber.

She woke up a few hours later, but she still felt tired and dizzy. She tried to sit up, but the movement made her head spin. So she lay down and stared at the ceiling, trying to remember what had happened.

Adrien...

It all came to her in a rush, squeezing her heart painfully. For a moment, Marinette wondered if she had imagined the whole of it; the meds sometimes addled her brain in strange ways. But as her head cleared, she could recollect everything more vividly. Her heart might not want to accept it, but her mind knew it was true. Marinette tried to keep her breathing even, as she took the risk to think about it. Because she needed to organise it all in her head, else she might have another attack anytime.

There was no reason why Adrien could not date a girl. He was kind, smart, handsome and rich, of course he had plenty of admirers. And he was at liberty to be with anyone he liked. Marinette would be a fool if she thought that just because she was the only girl Adrien would hang out at university, meant he didn't have any other female friends. He did have a life outside the university after all!

It took her some time to accept it though. When did her little crush how into such a big thing as this? It felt petty of her, to be unhappy with her friend's happiness. But could she blame herself? She loved Adrien! She was in love with him! Was it really wrong of her to hope that she would be the one for him? After all the attention he had been showering on her over the last few months? Huh, Adrien probably saw her as just a friend. And that thought hurt her in ways she could not explain.

For the next few days, Marinette did her best to keep her distance from Adrien at the university. She would pretend she didn't see him when he waved at her. She would turn around and walk away if she saw him approaching. She had no idea why she was doing this, only that the thought of being around him or talking to him made her feel like she couldn't breathe. She noticed how Adrien's face fell when she walked away from him, but she really couldn't do anything about it.

Despite Marinette's best efforts, one day, Adrien finally managed to corner Marinette. She was walking along the corridor when Adrien took her by surprise and pulled her into an empty classroom.

“Okay, what's going on?” Adrien asked, crossing his arms at his chest.

Marinette could feel her heartbeat getting faster. How was she going to get herself out of this? She kept her eyes fixed to the floor, doing her best not to look at the boy standing in front of her. What was she supposed to reply? But even then, she could feel his gaze directed at her, and it was making her nervous and uncomfortable.

“Please Marinette,” Adrien went on in a softer voice, “tell me what happened? Why are you not talking to me? Did I do something to hurt you? Are you mad at me?” He took both of Marinette's hands in his, which made her look up at him with widened eyes. “Please talk to me, Marinette,” he almost begged.

Marinette took a deep breath. Adrien would probably not let her go until she told him. But the problem was from where should she begin so that it made sense?

“Y-you never told me that you had a girlfriend.”

Adrien looked a bit taken aback at that. “Huh? I don't have a girlfriend. Not to my knowledge, that is.”

Seriously, he was trying to hide it even now?

“I heard the other girls talking about her. Ch-Clai-"

“Chloe?” Adrien offered.

When Marinette nodded, Adrien burst into laughter, much to her confusion.

“Oh no, Marinette, you've got it all wrong! Chloe is not my girlfriend.”

She wasn't? Marinette felt something in her heart begin to set in motion after a long time.

“Chloe is just a family friend. She's like a sister to me! She returned from New York only a few weeks ago. We have gone out for lunch a couple of times, and some stupid reporter decided that it would make an interesting headline.”

Marinette was not completely convinced, and that must have shown on her face. Adrien leaned in towards her, and went on, “I'll tell you a secret. Chloe isn't even interested in men. So if you ask me, you have more chance of dating her than I do,” he ended with a wink.

Marinette let out a little giggle at that.

“Oh how I have missed that sweet sound,” Adrien remarked, making Marinette blush furiously.

Just then, something clicked in Adrien's mind as his expression turned serious again. “So,” he began, “that's why you have been avoiding me all these days? I don't understand, why was it so upsetting to you?”

Oh no.

Marinette hesitated. But Adrien was not going to let it go. “Do you know Chloe? Do you not like her?”

“That's not what it is.”

“Then what is it?”

She was so not prepared for this conversation right now. This was such a mess. How was she going to get out of it now?

But maybe it would work out? Adrien was not dating anyone. He might actually reciprocate her feelings then! After all, he did care enough to have cornered her to solve problems between them...

Marinette closed her eyes and tried to steady her mind. It was now or never. This would be the moment when Marinette Dupain-Cheng declared her feelings for Adrien Agreste. This empty classroom would be the witness of the glorious or the heart-breaking moment that followed.

“It's because I love you.”

“What?”

Marinette could not figure out what Adrien was feeling, because he was giving her too less to work with right now. That one word carried almost no emotion, and his face displayed nothing but surprise.

“I am in love with you, Adrien Agreste.”

She felt silly repeating it.

After a few moments, Adrien finally spoke.

“I am sorry.”

That did not sound so good.

Marinette waited for him to continue, because that didn't feel like a conclusive statement at all.

“Marinette, I- I cannot return your feelings,” Adrien whispered, unable to meet her eyes.

Marinette kept staring blankly at Adrien. Her brain had stopped working.

A minute or two of painful silence passed between them. Adrien decided to speak first.

“You are an amazing girl, Marinette. I really like you, just not in that way. You are my best friend, and one of the closest people in my life. It's just that I don't feel the same-"

“So I am in love with you and you don't reciprocate?” Marinette suddenly snapped into speech interrupting him in the middle of his sentence.

Adrien was shocked into silence for a moment. But Marinette’s voice didn't sound accusatory at all. That was okay, right?

“Y-yes. That's right,” he managed to say.

“Oh, okay. I can deal with that.”

This did not feel quite right. Marinette didn't sound like she was alright.

“Are-are you okay Marinette?”

“Yes, I'm okay. I have been through this before,” she said in a voice louder than usual, with a weird grin on her lips.

Something about this was extremely unsettling. Marinette was behaving strangely and Adrien was beginning to get worried.

“Marinette, are you going to have an anxiety attack?”

“Pfft-no!” she lied.

“Can I-can I offer you a hug?”

At those words, something happened to Marinette. The smile faded from her face, and her eyebrows slanted downwards. Now the pain was visible in her eyes, as she whispered, “I'd like that.”

Adrien enfolded her in his arms and held her tightly. At first, Marinette stood limp, but slowly, she wrapped her arms around him and clutched on to him as though her life depended on it. And then she cried.

Adrien could feel her shaking in his arms, and the sobs and the wetness on the chest of his shirt didn't leave much to the imagination. It broke his heart to see her so weak, so broken. Tears broke through his eyes as he realised this was all because of him. But what could he do? He couldn’t just lead her on, only to break her heart later! This might be painful now, but this was for the best. Marinette deserved someone better than him, someone who could actually give her the love that she deserved.

Neither counted how long they stood like that. Wrapped up in each other’s arms, desperately seeking comfort. When at length they loosened their hold on each other, they took time to completely let go. And then Adrien took her hands in his and asked in a small voice “We're still going to be friends, right?”

“Y-yeah,” Marinette whispered, uncertainty looming over that word.

Friends. As if it were that easy.

Every time they crossed paths after that incident, it was painfully awkward. Forced smiles, monosyllable greetings, the over-formality was a constant reminder of the mess that had taken place in that empty room.

Marinette couldn’t stop blaming herself. It was her fault that she lost Adrien's friendship overnight. If she had managed to hold back her feelings, none of this would have happened. But what use thinking about it now, the damage was already done.

Adrien, on the other hand, held himself responsible for whatever happened. He seriously considered if it would have been worse than this if he had decided to give it a chance. At least that way he wouldn't have lost her company.

Within a few days, the forced friendship faded away as both of them began to actively avoid each other. Neither could bear to look at the pain on the other's face. The warm friendship had long decayed into an uncomfortable co-existence. And they found it too difficult to go on like that. So they both, separately, decided that it was for the best that they stayed away from each other. At least for a while, till they got their emotions sorted out.

#miraculous ladybug #ml fanfic #the road to us and everything in between #chapter 5 #no magic au #alternate universe - no powers #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #adrienette #chloe bourgeois #slow burn #my fic

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captainsolare · 4 years

Text

Concert

Fluffvember Day 7: Concert - Leopold Vermillion (f! reader)

Summary: You're a classical violinist and tonight is your big debut at the Castle Town concert hall. Your long-time friend Leopold is in the audience, and he begins to see you in a whole new light after watching you achieve your biggest dream

Word Count: 1,825

A/N: I’m probably a little biased because I am a classical violinist, but this was by far my favorite one to write so far this month! I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it. The Max Bruch Violin Concerto no. 1 partly inspired this so if you would like to, listen to the first movement.

masterlist

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You stood in the atrium of the concert hall, patrons, mostly upper crust and royalty, milling about and drinking before the event began. "Ugh Y/N, I don't know how you can stand going to these events. Everything is so stuffy, even the clothing." Your friend Leopold complained, pulling the collar of his dress shirt away from his neck. You rolled your eyes, at him lightly punching him in the arm, "Going to these events, is kind of my job you know. Plus, orchestra music isn't stuffy, you're just lame and have no taste."

Leo was about to object but before he could do so a bell was rung and you had to dash off. "Sorry! That's my cue to go change, I'll see you after the concert okay?" You said apologetically, planting a chaste goodbye kiss on his cheek before disappearing into the crowd. The kiss was meant as a friendly gesture, nothing more, the two of you had grown up quite close after all, but nonetheless Leo was left standing there dumbstruck, hand lightly touching the place your lips had been a moment before.

He gathered himself and entered the concert hall, heading for the Vermillion family box; he was a little nervous he had to admit, he was the sole Vermillion sibling here tonight and so a lot of eyes were on him. Fuegoleon was away on an important business matter and who knows where Mereoleona was, she usually couldn't be bothered to come to events like this, they were far too constricting for her wild nature.

Even though Leo found these events stuffy, like most of his royal duties, he came tonight without much complaint because tonight would be the first time he would get to see you perform a concerto with an orchestra as large as this one. You had picked up the violin at an early age, and had been traveling the country playing at concert halls all over, but tonight would be your big debut on the Castle Town stage and Leo was excited. Not because he particularly enjoyed orchestral music like this, but because it was something you enjoyed. Growing up, he had always admired the way your eyes sparkled as you talked about your dreams of someday playing on this stage, and here you were achieving the dream you had worked so hard for.

The first piece was a long drawn out number that had him nearly falling asleep, Mimosa, his cousin, had to elbow him several times to keep him from snoring. He supposed he should have felt a bit sheepish, but you weren't onstage so he couldn't bring himself to care all that much. During intermission Mimosa turned to him excitedly, "Y/N is on next, isn't that so exciting?" He nodded, "Yeah! This is her big dream!"

Intermission seemed to be over in a flash, the lights dimming and he waited with bated breath as the spotlight lit up the space you'd walk through shortly. When you appeared Leo felt his breath hitch, you were in a stunning turquoise dress, sparkling in the light that illuminated the stage. "Wow." Mimosa whispered, awestruck. He could only nod in agreement, the dress suited you perfectly, the perfect battle armor to conquer the stage tonight.

When you'd told him about this concert a few weeks ago, it had taken everything in him not to launch himself across the table and wrap you up in a bear hug. Well, almost everything, despite him trying not to, he did it anyway, leaving you both grinning ear to ear and laughing with excitement.

The audience clapped and you shook hands with the conductor and the concertmaster then took up your post near the front of the stage. Leo remembered you mentioning that you were nervous about playing from memory, so he silently cheered you on, hoping you could hear him in your heart.

As the timpani began playing, your eyes searched the audience, your hands were sweaty and your heart was pounding, you couldn't see the audience very well because of the spotlights but you knew there was a familiar head of red hair out in the crowd and that gave you comfort. The flutes and woodwinds came in next and you prepared to come in with your cadenza.

From the second your first note reached his ears, to the second your last chord echoed through the hall Leo simply found himself unable to take his eyes off of you. Your notes were spellbinding, taking his breath away and telling a story with just sound, it was a language unlike any he had heard before. He had always admired you, your strength of character, your sense of humor, your honesty, brutal at times but that's definitely when he needed to hear it the most; but tonight, something tugged at his heartstrings and was rooting in his brain, and suddenly he saw you in a whole new light.

When the concerto ended you were a panting mess, any trace of nervousness had evaporated as you reached the end, a beaming smile appeared on your face as you bowed, the roar of applause filling your ears. From somewhere in the crowd you heard a distinct whistle and you had to contain your laughter, that was definitely Leo. I guess he liked it then? That's fantastic! You probably wouldn't admit this to anyone, but when you got up on this stage tonight you didn't care about all the opinions of the various noble folk and royalty that had attended, if you were being honest the most important, and perhaps the only opinion that mattered to you was Leopold's.

You made your way to the atrium because you had to accept your congratulations from the audience members in person, it was simply good practice. Several people congratulated you, others noted that you played well even though you were not royalty, you took each comment with grace and a smile, praying that you'd be able to go home soon and celebrate as you wished to; perhaps with a long soak in the bath to ease your aching muscles.

Leo and Mimosa appeared in the atrium, eyes scanning the room for a sign of you; Mimosa couldn't help but be amused by the way you both perked up as you caught sight of one another. Ahh, young love. She mused, then giggled to herself, who am I kidding? I'm young too.

Leo made a beeline for you as soon as your current conversation ended and grabbed your hands with excitement. "Oh Y/N, that was so amazing, I could just kiss you right now!" He said, practically buzzing with energy. You deadpanned and he was about to pull away, but rather than pulling away as well you said, "Kiss me then." It was almost a challenge, and Leo backed down from it, suddenly hyper-aware of all the people watching you; he lost his nerve and decided to change the subject.

"Do you--- do you need someone to come with you? To help carry your things?" He asked, nervous about even this small interaction for some reason. Mentally he kicked himself, usually, conversation was so easy with you, but now he was just a bumbling mess. Your face fell into a smile, "That would be lovely Leo." You led the way to the green room and greeted the other performers, thanking them for a job well done. As you packed your things, Leo couldn't help but notice the slight frown that twisted your features. "Are you alright?" he asked quietly. When you nodded he dropped the subject, opting instead to carry your things as he had promised.

The atrium was empty when you emerged from the green room, and you found yourself in awkward silence with Leo. Secretly, you were disappointed that he hadn't taken you up on your challenge earlier and you didn't know how to feel about it. Do I really have feelings for him? Leo's thoughts seemed to be on the same track as yours as you exited the building into the night air.

"Did you mean it?" "Mean what?" You asked, turning to face him; in an attempt to not misconstrue things you weren't going to answer unless he asked you exactly what was on his mind. A blush graced Leo's features and his heart was pounding in his head, "Did you actually want me to kiss you back there?"

You tilted your head, trying to sort through your emotions so you could give him a straight answer. "I think so. I'm not really sure, I just, I said that without thinking and I'm not sure of what exactly I'm feeling right now." Leo gulped, trying to gather up the courage for his next question, "Do you… do you still want me to?"

Your heart pounded in your chest as you nodded, eyes not leaving your friend for a second as he carefully set your things on the ground next to him. He wiped his sweaty palms on his pants and awkwardly grabbed your arms as he leaned in, the kiss was short and sweet, but it left you with an unsatisfied feeling and solidified in your mind that you did, in fact, want to kiss him. In fact, you wanted to kiss his stupid face again and again.

Leo looked away awkwardly, wanting to kiss you again but not sure how to ask. Luckily he didn't have to, as you grabbed his shirt and pulled him in closer to you. "Do you want me to?" You asked breathlessly, you were so close you could feel each other's breaths on your lips. When he nodded you didn't hesitate, slamming your lips into his.

Mimosa appeared from out of the concert hall, a mixture of wanting to roll her eyes and cheer seeping into her expression. "Took you guys long enough." She said, hands on her hips and looking away; she was happy for you both but the last thing she wanted to watch was your makeout session.

The two of you jumped and pulled apart quickly at her sudden interjection. "What do you mean, took us long enough?" You asked, a little sheepish at the implication that she had known your feelings long before you had. "Don't worry about it. Want to go get some ice cream or something to go celebrate your big night?" You and Leo exchanged a glance, "Absolutely!" Mimosa led the way to the nearby ice cream shop, you and Leo trailing a little ways behind.

"Was tonight exactly how you dreamed it would be?" He asked as you walked hand in hand. You shook your head and smiled at him, glancing at your intertwined hands, "Nope, it was even better."

"Hurry up or I'll eat without you!" Mimosa yelled, interrupting your moment for a second time that night. You both chuckled and sped up to meet her at the door, filled with the feeling of a new chapter beginning.

#Fluffvember 2020 #f!reader #leopold vermillion fluff #leopold x reader #aurora borealis #planet fluffvember

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syntheticpoetry · 4 years

Text

Constellations

Summary: When the text comes in from Tina, Kurt can hardly believe what he is reading. When Blaine doesn't respond to his messages he thinks his heart may actually stop beating. AO3 link || FFN Link

Author’s Note: I was watching Shooting Star and overcome with a million emotions, mostly having to do with the fact that we don't get ANY conversation or scene with the NYC gang during this insanely emotional episode. So this is my take on it. A little bit of canon, but a little divergence for the Klaine scene I desperately wanted to see as well as Kurt, Santana, and Rachel’s reactions. I promise there is a happy ending in this through the rollercoaster of emotions that is Blaine's mind during this absolutely horrifying ordeal. Big thanks to @roxymusicandlayers for beta reading this for me!

“And I am lost, so lost, but you’re the constellations that guide me.”

_________________________________________________________

“Alright guys, start texting and tweeting, whatever social media you use. Let everyone know what’s going on here. But don’t say where we are, shooters have smartphones too.”

Blaine hears Mr. Schue’s urgent whisper as though he is underwater. The words sound muffled and heavy with the depth of the room’s collective terror embedded into every upturned syllable. Despite his best effort to keep the hysteria at bay, they know he is just as frightened as they are. Blaine bites his lip and remains so still that every muscle starts to quiver, threatening to give way. The burn feels familiar, like the ache he gets from lifting weights in the gym with Sam, and he pushes through the pain as though it is just one more rep away before they can finally rest.

Any slight movement will betray his feigned composure and he knows the domino effect of his breakdown will begin. Around him the gentle, frantic padding of fingers against glass echoes around the room like a discordant symphony of additional gunshots. He knows they are not as loud as they actually sound in his head. But the panic in his chest still swells. He hugs his knees tighter. The small movement is enough to send the first wave of tears down his cheeks. He bites his lip harder and tries to focus on the pain of teeth against flesh instead.

‘I should do what they’re doing. Pick up your phone. Keep it together.’

“Blaine, it’s okay. It’s going to be okay,” Sam reaches a hand out and the touch of his fingers against Blaine’s forearm sends thunderbolts up his spine. “Where’s your phone?”

Blaine opens his mouth to speak and instead gasps loudly, the breath shuddering on the sharp intake of air. He claps a hand over his mouth and squints his eyes shut as more tears come. His mistake was moving at all. Statues never cry. He stretches out one leg and wrenches the phone from his pocket to see it at 1% battery. With one hand pressed firmly against quivering lips, the muffled whisper comes convulsing out in staccato bursts. “It’s— it’s almost— d-d—”

He can’t bring himself to say the word dead. As though breathing life into it will somehow fulfill some unspoken prophecy, and he is bound to doom them all by simply uttering it. Sam squeezes his arm and whispers back, “Do you want to text anyone with my phone?”

Blaine nods frantically when his phone screen finally turns to black. He gingerly places it on the ground in what feels like slow motion, taking extreme care not to make a sound, and extends his hand out to Sam. He thinks back to Mr. Schue’s garbled words and wonders if they really are underwater.

“I can’t get in touch with my mom,” The subdued sound of Marley’s panicked sobbing ricochets off of the walls. “She won’t respond! What if she— there’s no back way out of the kitchen!”

While Kitty and Jacob whisper empty reassurances Blaine stares at Sam’s phone in his hand like it is a foreign object. He knows what he is supposed to do with it, but the phone numbers in his mind are written in invisible ink.

‘I can’t even remember my parents’ phone numbers. Oh god, what if we die in here. What if I never see them or Cooper or Kurt—”

A flash of hands clasped tight, buried deep into a mattress fills his vision. The breathy whisper of his own name makes the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. His trembling thumbs begin to fly seamlessly over the keypad and he has never been so thankful for autocorrect before. Just as he hits send the dull pounding sound of running footsteps in the hall crescendos until—

Rattle! Rattle! Rattle!

The jittering of the door handle makes them all collectively jump as though this is just another lesson in synchronisation for their next competition. Blaine’s heart slithers its way into his throat, and he drops the phone. It slides away from him and bumps into Sam’s ankle. Sam’s leg jerks and sends it careening across the floor of the choir room where it settles underneath the piano. The entire scene is something straight out of a shitty comedy movie that feels completely unbelievable, like the chances of something like this happening are one in a million. The irony of the realm of impossibilies reaching its peak today is not lost on him. The entire room stills. Blaine wishes that stupid ticking of the metronome in the center of the room would. Just. Stop. It feels like a countdown.

Smash!

Blaine jumps again and presses his hand harder to his mouth to suppress the sound that begs for escape. He hugs his knees closer to his chest in a one-armed embrace and tries to will the demon perched on his shoulder whispering unpleasantries to vanish. The burn settles in again. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots Artie struggling to sit himself up against the cabinets. He wants to move, wants to help him; but when he tries to unhook his arm from his knees, nothing happens. He continues spectating as Sam begins lifting Artie up by his shirt until he’s sitting comfortably upright. Then he witnesses the moment of pure panic in his best friend’s eyes right before Sam hisses frantically to Mr. Schue, “Brittany doesn’t have her phone, she’s in the bathroom! She’s all alone!”

___________________________________________________

“Oh honey, no goddamn way!” Kurt snatches the remote back from Rachel. “Santana and I were here first, you don’t just get to come in and throw a hissy fit about having a bad day so you can put on whatever you want. How do you know we didn’t have a bad day too?”

Santana averts her attention from the television to watch them instead, positively beaming. Their fights are honestly her favourite thing to watch. Always far more entertaining than whatever trashy reality shows she and Kurt had been immersing themselves in lately. Today it had been a marathon of the first season of Rock of Love.

“Well, considering you’re both in the exact same spot I left you in this morning I seriously doubt it,” Rachel huffs loudly and sinks down into a creaky wicker chair, arms folded tightly across her chest. Kurt rolls his eyes at her and changes the channel back before the gentle buzzing of his phone across the coffee table distracts him from Rachel’s moodiness.

“Go make some popcorn and I’ll let you vent— oh,” Kurt stares down at his phone.

“What?” Rachel lowers her arms, keeping them folded across her stomach still, and exchanges her scowl for curiosity.

“Sam texted me, he usually never…” The rest of his sentence trails off once he opens the message, leaving them to stare. He loosens his grip and drops his hands against his thighs, the phone resting precariously on his open palms. After the fourth quick scan of the text the message still does not seem to sink in.

Sam 12:36 p.m. I love you so much and I’m so sorry about everything that happened I’m so glad I got to see you at the wedding you’re amazing and deserve everything in the world I’m so proud of you don’t ever settle for anyone less than perfect because that’s exactly what you are

‘This can’t be for me.’

“Kurt, what is it? What’s wrong?” Rachel leans over, her palms on her knees now, her brows furrowed in concern.

“What’s Trouty mouth saying?” Santana snatches the phone from him. He does not even protest her invasion of privacy, his brain is too busy slicing through the fog to decrypt the reasoning behind the message. She frowns and looks between the screen and Kurt a few times. “Did I miss the part when you and Sam got together? No way my gaydar is that far off.”

“There’s no way that’s for me. He obviously meant to send it to someone else. Do you think he meant it for Mercedes?” Kurt plucks the phone back from her hands to reread the message before typing out a reply.

Kurt 12:44 p.m. I don’t think you meant this for me?

“What did it say?” Rachel pipes up and cranes her neck to try to read over Kurt’s shoulder. Kurt tilts the phone to show her. “Ooooh, wait did something happen between them at the wedding? Wasn’t he there with Brittany then though?” Kurt shrugs and scrolls through his contacts until he lands on Mercedes’ name.

Kurt 12:50 p.m. Okay maybe random question but is there something going on with you and Sam again? I got the weirdest message from him just now

Mercedes 12:55 p.m. ???? What did he say?

Kurt takes a screenshot of the message and forwards it to her.

Mercedes 1:00 p.m. Omg nope nothing happened with us at the wedding. Maybe he meant to send it to Brittany? Has he not replied?

Kurt 1:02 p.m. Nope

Tina’s name flashes across the top of his screen in a drop down banner and he taps on it. “Oh my god.” The words come out small and frightened as he reads the message. “Tina just said—”

“She just texted me too,” Santana replies in an eerily despondent voice that Kurt has never heard her speak in before. It suddenly makes the situation feel ten times more real. For once, she’s silent as she stares down at her own phone, frantically typing out a text.

“Me too,” Rachel whispers. “Oh my god, do you think everyone is okay?” She stands and crosses the room, pacing by the window as she rereads the text over and over again. “Kurt, have you heard from Blaine?”

‘Blaine.’

Kurt cannot find the words to respond to her as he taps on his favourites list. Blaine’s name is still at the very top. He had told himself he had never gotten the chance to adjust the list and remove him after their breakup. Really, he never had the heart to erase his name. The sight of it now makes his throat constrict. He tries to speak but no sound comes out.

“Brittany isn’t texting me back. Neither is Sam,” Santana borders on hysterical as she grips her phone between her hands like it is her only lifeline. Kurt mimics her action as he composes a text to Blaine.

Kurt 1:10 p.m. Tina texted me are you ok

“Has anyone heard anything from anyone else?” Rachel asks. Neither of them respond.

Kurt cannot look away from Blaine’s name. The feeling washes over him suddenly and intensely, dragging his logical mind into the riptide of superstitious terror as he recites the name silently like a mantra. If he looks away, he might lose him forever. It doesn’t make any sense to think that way. He knows it. But it provides some tiny semblance of comfort and control as he tethers himself to it and waits for a response. Two long minutes pass by and still nothing comes. Tina’s name and phone number fills the screen, swallowing Blaine’s name, and he finally finds his voice, the words frantic and choppy as he taps multiple times to decline the call, “Someone call Tina, she’s calling me. Someone call her so she stops calling me!”

The sight of Blaine’s name again anchors him down once more and the rest becomes background noise.

'Please be okay. Please be okay. I’m never saying goodbye to you, you idiot. Just text me back. Please.’

__________________________________________________________

“Mr. Schue, I have to get to her! I have to make sure she’s okay!”

Blaine watches, horrorstuck, as Mr. Shue and coach Beiste struggle to restrain Sam. He is thrashing wildly in their arms, his quivering voice crescendoing past the panicked whispers that everyone else has adapted. It isn’t until coach Beiste whispers something in his ear that Blaine cannot hear, and Sam locks eyes with him that he finally settles down. Blaine exhales sharply, lungs blazing and heart thudding at the base of his throat, and realizes he must have been holding his breath at some point. Sam slinks back over to their corner and sits beside Artie, his head hanging down in defeat. Blaine tries to parrot back the same empty promises Sam had whispered earlier, wants to tell him everything will be okay even though he is not quite sure if he believes it himself, but nothing comes out.

“Maybe she’s with Tina,” Artie whispers hopefully to Sam. “Maybe she isn’t alone.”

Blaine takes note of Artie’s lack of confidence and how he is careful not to speak in absolutes. But maybe he is right. He thinks about the word maybe in the context of his life. Maybe Kurt did not want to admit how much their hookup at the wedding had meant. Maybe he and Kurt really are back together. Maybe Kurt still loves him. Maybe he will see him again when this entire ordeal is finally over with. ‘Maybe’ starts to feel like a pretty good word the more he thinks about it. ‘Maybe’ feels like hope. ‘Maybe’ feels like a second chance.

The sound of a door opening breaks through Blaine’s inner dissection of the word, and he looks over just in time to see Mr. Schue skulking out of the door. It reminds Blaine of one of Finn’s video games about spies and stealth. Maybe they will get another chance to play it together after this. He clings to that and tries to focus on the upcoming Friday night dinner with him, Burt and Carole as Marley’s sobbing continues to grow louder. Her gasps for air further enforces his previous belief. Maybe they really are underwater.

It isn’t long before the choir room door opens again and a collection of cheerleaders rushes in followed by Mr. Schue. Blaine watches Sam vault off of the cabinets like a spring loaded toy to pull Brittany into his arms. She has never looked so terrified before. But there is no sign of Tina amongst the red and white uniforms. Blaine forgets about the maybe’s floating around his brain like buoys at sea and feels like he is drowning again. He twists his head away and stares down pathetically at the blank screen of his cellphone, willing it to magically come alive.

‘How could I have forgotten to charge it? I used to lecture Kurt about this all the time.’

Maybe it is a sign. Maybe it is a metaphor of sorts.

He does not know when Artie began recording them with his phone, but the start of Marley’s hiccuped confession fills his lungs with water again. “In the bottom of my desk drawer,” She breaks off to compose herself. The volume of her crying sends off alarm bells in Blaine’s head and he tunes out the rest of her message. He looks towards the hastily strewn barricade against the door. Maybe it will prove to be sturdy, but it does not feel like enough. The continued tapping of fingers against glass screens fills in the gaps of silence between the metronome and scattered crying when Artie pans the camera onto Blaine. It feels like a slow dance towards a death sentence. Maybe the rhythmic ticking really is a countdown.

“Blaine, do you want to say anything to anyone?”

He drops his face down into his knees. Maybe he should take the opportunity to leave behind one tiny fragment of his life before he becomes another forgotten statistic. But Artie has already redirected the phone towards Sam and Brittany when Blaine looks up again. Maybe he has missed his chance. ‘Maybe’ starts to feel like a cursed word now. Like something sinister and evil and concrete. Maybe he has inflated the word with too much hope causing some sort of rebound effect. Maybe—

“All clear!”

The words break through the hurricane in the choir room and suddenly everyone is getting to their feet except Blaine, who still feels sluggish and dazed. Sam and Brittany approach him and hold out their hands. He stares at their open palms, trembling and sweaty, and his body acts before his brain does to grasp them. They lift him up like he is made of helium despite the lead shackles he envisions around his ankles. He becomes aware of Sam’s arms around him and shakes away the anchors in his own arms to return the embrace. The burn is still there, leaving his muscles fatigued and weak, but he cannot bring himself to let go now that he has latched on.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. See? We’re okay,” Sam whispers against his ear before Blaine realizes why he is taking such extra care to console him. The sound of his own sobbing, punctuated by rattling intakes of air, reminds him why he tried to remain so still at the start of all of this. He buries his face deep in Sam’s neck to muffle the sound and feels the addition of Brittany’s slender arms around both of them, leaving him sandwiched in between. The shuffling sound of footsteps towards the door leads to the eventual end of the embrace and Sam jogs over to the piano, crouching down to retrieve his phone before they join hands and follow everyone else on the way to the parking lot.

“Blaine, I have a charger in my car.” Sam says as he raises his phone to his ear. Brittany slips her hand away from Blaine and he hears her whimpering Santana’s name before seeing she has also pulled out her phone. Blaine laces his fingers with Sam and clings tightly as they weave their way through the crowd towards Sam’s car. “Mom, hey I’m okay. We’re okay. We’re outside now— please don’t cry, I promise I’m okay.”

When Sam finally pulls his hand free, Blaine thinks he might just float away. It takes Sam only a few seconds to wrench open the car door and jam his key into the ignition. “Blaine, here— Wait, Kurt’s calling my phone. Mom, let me take this, and I’ll call you right back? Blaine’s phone died, he has no way to— yes, I’ll be right home as soon as I can. I love you too.”

Blaine’s fingers are numb by the time Sam has pressed the phone into his hand. Kurt’s frantic, breathless voice breathes life into them, and he curls them tightly around the device just before it is about to fall. “Sam! Brittany called Santana and said you guys made it out. I can’t get in touch with Blaine, is he—”

“It’s me,” Blaine exhales and the volume of Kurt’s sob makes his knees shake. He leans against the car door but slides down it as Kurt continues to cry loudly in his ear.

“Why weren’t you answering me?” Kurt sputters out, his voice traversing the length of his entire vocal range like a warmup.

“My phone died, that’s why I texted you with Sam’s—”

“You didn’t say it was you!” Kurt’s voice rises three octaves. Blaine presses the phone closer to his ear like it will actually close any of the distance between them. “I thought it was a mistake! I thought it was Sam! Why didn’t either of you get back to me on— Blaine, are you crying or laughing?”

“Both, I think,” Blaine responds airily between watery laughter. In the timespan of less than two hours he feels as though he has mastered every element associated with human emotion. The fire in his lungs has been reduced to embers as Kurt’s voice continues to blanket him. The laughter should feel inappropriate, but it feels like letting go. It feels like a release. He finally feels grounded. “The stupid phone— it was insane— I dropped it and Sam kicked it under the piano— if you saw it— I’m sorry, I don’t know why I can’t stop laughing, but it just feels so good to hear your voice again. I thought I was never going to hear it again or see you or—”

“Don’t you ever, ever, write a message to me like that again!” Kurt interrupts his rambling and suddenly the laughter becomes lodged in his throat. Maybe he had been wrong to assume all of those ideas about them earlier. Maybe Kurt’s next few words will feel like an actual gunshot wound.

“Kurt, I’m sorry, I thought—”

“I told you I’m never saying goodbye to you,” Kurt parades through his apology, trying to sound bold and certain. Blaine can see the hairline cracks in the foundation as Kurt wavers through the next command. “Don’t you ever try to say goodbye to me like that again, do you understand me?”

“Understood,” He replies with the remnants of his previous laughter, the solitary sound coming out strangled and relieved all at once. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

“You’re sorry you—” The way he says it sends shivers down Blaine’s spine. It is the same breathy exhale that had been reserved for their night in the hotel as their hands sank deeper and deeper into the mattress. “Blaine, you must have been fucking terrified, how can you focus on me?”

“Because I love you,” Blaine says simply. For once there is no anxiety or fear to cage the confession. It flies freely over the soundwaves and he does not worry about the reply because he already knows the response without Kurt having to say it. But Kurt says it anyways.

“I love you too.”

‘Maybe’ starts to feel like a second chance again. ‘Maybe’ feels like a promise.

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