While I do find it funny that henchmen in Gotham probably warn each other about the Red Hood because he's a bat who will actually kill you. I think it would be better if Jason was actually seen as some sort of savior or idol to like 90% of the goons scattered around Gotham. Doesn't matter who they work for, they all know Jason, former crime-lord that took over majority of Gotham's underground in one night.
---
Jason, years after the events of UTRH, now fighting crime alongside the batfam, except every goon he runs into immediately recognizes him, stops fighting, and starts begging.
the first time it happens, Jason assumes they're begging for their lives only to hear them begging for him to return to the crime lord business so they can work for him and not Gotham's current money-stingy, abusive rogues (Black Mask lol)
---
Jason showing up to patrol as backup for Dick in an overrun warehouse full of Two-Face's henchmen and as Jason's about to interfere, one of the men stops dead in their tracks and stares really hard at Jason until:
Goon: Oh my God, boss, is that you?
Jason, pulling out his guns, about to shoot:
Goon: Mr. Hood, sir???
Jason, halfway about to pull the trigger: Wait a min–Jeremy? Oh wow, it's been ages! How's the wife?
Goon (Jeremy): Oh my God it IS you, holy shit where have you BEEN? Me and the guys miss you, man!
Dick, with a knife at his throat: What is happening right now
Jason: Ahh, well, crime-lording just wasn't fitting in on the daily schedule. Tryna turn over a new leaf and all that
Goon (Jeremy): Aw, that's disappointing. We really liked working for you, right guys?
[Chorus of enthusiastic "YEAHS" from the rest of the henchmen (even the one holding Dick at knifepoint)]
Goon (Jeremy): Well, anyways, I can't beat you up knowing you're my old boss! You gave us the best health benefits! We'll just let you take the evidence and leave.
Jason: Aw, thanks guys :)
---
And that's why 95% percent of Jason's missions in Gotham end in success. Not because he's willing to kill people or because rogues are terrified of him, but because 90% of the rogues' henchmen once worked for Jason and fuckin love him lol.
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✮↳ If I Want It, I Shall Have It ↰
♡ yandere! princess x gn reader (2.5k words)♡
tw/cw: obsessive love, drugging, use of chloroform, kidnapping, reader hates the monarchy, slightly rushed ending
authors notes: im going on vacation for like a week so I probably won't be online much, here's my little gift to you all <3 (ignore how I literally had to force myself to finish this since I've been working on it for weeks-)
➼ yandere! princess Who was never really interested in romance. She had her castle, she had her garden, and everything she could ever want, so she didn't think romance was necessary for her.
➼ yandere! princess Whose parents were constantly on her case about getting married and "continuing the family legacy". She was the only daughter of the king and queen, so she was the only hope to keep the monarchy alive.
➼ yandere! princess Who would always brush them off by saying that "it's not the right time," or "I haven't found anyone I fancy yet," but she knows that nobody will cut it for her. She's too high-maintenance, too extravagant; none of the princes in her kingdom or the next would satisfy her.
➼ yandere! princess Whose parents had finally had enough of her denial, so they decided to bring the candidates to her. It was just an unchanging cycle of them introducing an over-eager prince, her rolling her eyes, dismissing him, and waiting with a bored expression for the next disappointment.
➼ yandere! princess Who would look out her window longingly, gazing up into the endless night sky with tired, hopeless eyes. "Perhaps there really is no one for me..." she whispers into the cold spring air, lying down on her delicate satin sheets. As her tired mind begins to fade, a single tear slides down her cheek and onto her powder-white pillow, a single mark of imperfection.
➼ yandere! princess Who woke up feeling even more tired than before she had slept. She groaned, rubbing her eyes with her soft, perfectly manicured hands. She slowly gets up and opens her soft pink curtains to reveal a gorgeous view of the entire kingdom; a sight she was absolutely enamoured with as a child but had now grown sick of. She slides open her glass door to step out onto her balcony, letting the wind gently caress her face. As she leans against the railings, the soft scent of freshly baked bread surrounds her. She looks down to see someone stepping out of the bakery and taking some pastries out of the oven. Their face is hidden in shadow, but she can see their mouth turn into a frown as they look up at the castle. Her eyes linger on their frame even after they've left, sighing heavily.
➼ yandere! princess Who had gotten sick and tired of her parent's desperate attempts to get her engaged, and just needed a break from them.
➼ yandere! princess Who called her chauffeur to take her out into the town, and to not tell her parents lest they bring her back.
➼ yandere! princess Who hopped into her grand carriage, looking out the window as they left the castle gates, excitedly anticipating getting to see what a normal life would be like.
"We've arrived, Princess." Her chauffeur calls from the front seat, getting out to open her door for her.
"Thank you very much," She politely nods to him, adjusting the scarf on her head.
"Don't wait for me, you can head back to the castle." She dismisses him with a wave of her hand, walking into the market. She looks at everything with awe, all the ordinary stalls looking more magical to her than anything in her castle. As soon as she walks into the town square, she can hear whispers all around her.
Murmurs of "Is that Princess Asmaan?" and "No, it surely couldn't be!" float around her like dandelion seeds, drifting along the winds into every corner of the small village.
She pays them no mind, having become used to the constant whispering that follows her wherever she goes. Soon enough, that familiar scent of freshly baked pastries fills her senses. Not thinking about anything else, she follows the scent to a small building with a large oven right next to it. Her eyes are wide as she watches someone dive into the circular oven and pulls out a few scalding hot flatbreads. A look of awe and shock cross her face at the feat which, in her eyes, seemed incredible, but to you... it was just another day in the bakery.
A man walks past the counter, giving her a glance in her direction before stopping in his tracks. He looks absolutely shocked, but then smiles widely.
"Princess! It's such an honour to have you here- what brings you to our little part of town?" Your father asks in an excited tone, to which she returns the enthusiasm.
"I wanted to see how my people are doing, and I couldn't help but notice the smell of your wonderful goods! May I have two naans, please?" Her excitement is genuine, but it makes you sick.
"Of course! Y/n, bring two naans, the best of the batch!" Your father's booming voice is carried through the small building, making you roll your eyes.
"Coming..." you mumble, putting two flatbreads in a paper bag. As you walk up to the counter, you notice just who you're serving. A disgusted scowl appears on your face as you stride up to the clay table, slamming the bag onto it and glaring at her straight in the eyes.
"That'll be 421." You grumble, your voice full of disdain. Your father looks at you with a shocked expression, as if to say "You dare tell the Princess to pay?!" but you remain stoic as you wait for her to reply.
"Oh... yes, of course!" She reaches into her purse and pulls out a few crisp bills, to which your father interjects.
"No, no, there's no need for that! You're the princess, after all, we should be glad just to be in your presence!" He waves his hands in front of his face, smiling nervously. You, on the other hand, snatch the bills from her hand and put them in the drawer under the counter.
"Have a nice day," You say in a monotone voice as a clear indicator for her to leave. She looks a bit taken aback but takes the hint regardless.
"Ah... you too!" She smiles brightly before turning on her heel and walking away. As she walks through the busy streets, her mind is focused on one thing; you. She's never seen someone look at her with such hatred... she's the princess, everybody loves her! Everybody except you. She found your annoyed behaviour to be quite intriguing, almost... alluring. "They're a very interesting person... i need to know more about them." She thinks as she takes a seat on a large rock in the town square, silently eating her food. She looks down at the golden brown bread, her eyes softening slightly. She takes one bite, then another, then another before realizing something. You were the person that made this. It was you who flattened it between your palms, you who sprinkled the sesame seeds on top, and you who dove into the oven to bake it. This seemingly ordinary pastry was now not ordinary at all; it was a piece of you. She smiles to herself as she eats in silence, the naan now tasting that much sweeter to her.
After another hour or so of walking through the crowded streets, she started to get bored. She walks back down the street in which your bakery resided, smirking as she went behind a few buildings and to the side of your bakery, watching with soft eyes as you move about the kitchen. You notice someone behind you, a pair of eyes staring and watching your every move. You take a deep breath, put the dough down, and turn around. You clearly don't expect to see her, causing a look of surprise to grow on your face, before quickly turning to frustration. She giggles at your expression, not saying a word.
"Why are you here?" You hiss out from behind clenched teeth.
She looks around innocently, playing with the end of her scarf. "I wanted to see how a bakery works." Her answer is truthful, but it only angers you more.
"Never seen a bakery before?" You scowl at her, going back to flipping the bread and stretching it out.
"Spoiled, entitled little brat..." You mumble under your breath. "Probably never even seen someone making food since everything is done for you..."
She rests her head in her hands, leaning her elbows on the ledge of the open window as she gazes at you longingly. She stays quiet, thinking about what you just said, before speaking up.
"Do you hate me?" Her question is simple in nature, but has a complicated meaning behind it. It could be a threat, a genuine question, or a test.
You've always been one to answer with your heart, so the answer comes to you naturally.
"yes, I do. You're a selfish, spoiled little rat who's always had everything handed to you on a silver platter. You pretend to care about your people, but while we're all here living in literally dirt-poor conditions, you're sitting in your lavish castle without a care in the world. How could I not hate you?" You're practically seething at this point, but she doesn't care.
"You're right. I'm lucky. I could've been born into the same fate as you, working hard every day just to make ends meet. But I wasn't, and I'm so thankful for it." She sighs, standing up straight.
"I'm sorry that wasn't the case for you." Her voice is slightly sad as she walks away, the cold night air enveloping her entire being. She gazes up at the large castle looming in the distance, a small frown appearing on her face. You were right, she had everything handed to her. whatever she wanted, she got. And she was going to make sure that included you as well.
iIt's late at night when she finally returns to the castle, rushing to her room with quiet feet so she doesn't wake up anyone. She opens the double doors to her bedroom and slowly walks inside. Lying down on her bed, her mind wanders to the conversation she just had.
"How could I not hate you...?" She repeats your line in a whisper, the soft moonlight cascading onto her. As she's lost in her thoughts, she stands up and walks to her closet.
"How could I not hate you..." That single line plays in her mind on a loop as she grabs some dark pants and a black shirt with a matching scarf.
"You've always had everything handed to you..." She mumbles as she pulls on the loose shirt.
"Everything... but not you." Her voice is firm as she walks out, a stern glare in her brown eyes.
She silently opens her door and walks over to one of the many cleaning closets, sneaking inside and locking the door. As she waits for her eyes to adjust, she starts to think of a plan. Her eyes focus on a sheet of paper stuck to the back walls with a list of chemicals on them. She scans the paper before finding the one she needs. "Blue jug, Chloroform". She grabs a rag and the blue jug of chemicals as she plods through the room and to the door, trying to be as quiet as possible so as not to disturb anyone. She sneaks down many flights of stairs while having to take breaks in between, her frail arms not being used to having to carry that much weight. When she finally reaches the entrance, she takes a deep breath and opens the door a crack, slipping through noiselessly. Walking past the castle gates and into the road behind the now silent town, she starts to wonder why she didn't just have one of her maids do it for her. She's about to return before your words come back to her in a wave.
"You've always had everything handed to you... how could I not hate you..." Your words spur her on to continue with her plan, determined to prove you wrong. Perhaps if she did this on her own, you'd finally see her for who she is!
She sighs dreamily as she walks behind your bakery, peering inside the window to see if she could spot anyone. In the dusty glass window of the kitchen, she can see you sleeping at the kitchen counter. When she sees your calm resting face, she almost swoons. You've only ever looked at her with hatred, be it either to her face or up at her from the ground. Her resolve is now set, she had to change your mind.
She soaks the rag in the chemicals, wrapping her scarf around her face so she doesn't breathe it in. Her feet are quiet as she sneaks behind the counter and into the kitchen, the lack of doors making it so much easier for her to creep in. She stands directly next to your sleeping figure, a sad look crossing her face.
"I'm sorry I had to do this..." She whispers before her gentle hands slowly place the rag over your nose and mouth.
A minute after she puts the rag on your face, you start to wake up. Your eyes grow wide as you realize what's happening, but with the scarf covering her face you can't see who's attacking you. You start to thrash and scream, but nobody can hear you because of the rag. She holds you down with a gentle touch so that you can't escape, and after a few more minutes, you're completely gone. She grins wildly when you stop struggling, your limp body a sign of her success. She pulls you out of the chair as carefully as she could, but she ended up dropping you because of how delicate her arms are.
"You won't mind, will you, qaundom~?" She chuckles softly as she drags your limp body across the floor.
She drags you past the kitchen, the counter, and the side of the building until you're finally back behind the bakery. She takes the bottle of chemicals and ties the handle to her shirt so she doesn't have to carry them, dragging you along the grass and toward the castle. Eventually, she makes it to a door at the back of the castle, opens it, and throws you inside with all of her remaining strength, now completely winded from the trip. After taking a minute to recuperate, she takes your hand and hauls you into an empty cell that's been separated from all the others. She lays you down onto the thin mattress, dusts off her hands and looks at you lovingly.
"You were right, darling. When I want something, I get it." She walks out and closes the cell door softly so it doesn't make that much noise, the rattle of the chain lock echoing through the desolate dungeon.
"And absolutely nothing can stand in my way." Her eyes go cold for a split second as she stares at your lifeless form before turning on her heel and walking to the door.
"Don't hate me for this." With a slam of the iron door, she's gone, leaving only the faint scent of her perfume in her wake.
tags: @skylark144 @izizzl @odobun @alhaizen @decepticon-99 @twilightkitkat @red-viewe @lasagna-goob @cyphertryagain @hailchocolate @underneathablanketwithwolfkeum @angelofdarkness2 @ren-054 @emptybrain01 @phoenix-eclipses @amourzinna
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happy 4/20 here's some headcanons about the shit bugs used to get elevated
Alcohol: good 'ol alcohol. Found everywhere in every tribe of Hallownest, brewed in pretty much every way possible. Unregulated in trade by pretty much all tribes except for the stuff the Pale King consumes, which is often strong enough to give an entire room alcohol poisoning (wyrms are resistant to pretty much all toxins). Even the Hive have fermented honey and nectar, though they are much stricter about who indulges; it's more often exported for trade than consumed. Among the tribes, limitations only exist among the beetles and mantises, as both have violent tendencies and are liable to pick a fight when drunk; mantises regulate it to festivals and mating season, when sparring is likely to happen anyways, while drunk beetles outside homes and bars are often picked up and stuffed into trash cans to sober them up (and hopefully teach them a lesson in the meanwhile)
Gulka venom: an intoxicating substance with mildly hallucinogenic effects. Unregulated in trade, though that's mostly because there is no trade- the Mosskin refuse to collect it for other tribes, going out of their way only for the snail shamans (who are herb-masters with great healing knowledge) You'll have to harvest it yourself if you want to indulge, and that means there's a bit of a black market for it in Hallownest
Shamanistic Death-Herbs: a blend of relatively common herbs that, when dried together in a certain way, creates an extremely toxic blend if consumed or inhaled (when burned). Typically used to give those suffering a peaceful, painless death, it has powerful hallucinogenic effect under its killing threshold, and is one of the few toxins that can affect void creatures in any way (it puts them to sleep/makes them high). The fear of the void worshipers using them in battle against her moths was one of the excuses the Radiance used for her genocide against the snail tribe, though the shamans themselves have strict oaths to use them only for healing, and have never broken those oaths or used them against another tribe (at least, as far as the few who remember the age of dark can recall)
Bitterroot: an anti-contraceptive and abortion drug that can have an intoxicating-but dangerous- effect if too much of it is chewed. Grows primarily in the Crossroad region, and is heavily regulated in Hallownest- it is easily attainable and available to all, but herbalists are required by law to cut it and sell it in specific portion sizes for different species of bug, to prevent fatalistic overdosing. Tribes with overlap of the growing range tend to follow this rule, though it is not as strictly monitored as in the City (where many different species of bugs congregate, and thus require different doses to be effective)
Lifeblood: A life-boosting substance with magical roots that invigorates the self, at the risk of overestimating limitations and causing irreversible harm to the body when infused with it. This risk, while minimal with supervision, was what the Pale King used as an excuse to ban it, when in reality the main reason for the ban is because it is directly tied to an unascended abyssal god (the Lifeblood creature). Pretty heavily regulated in the Pale King's realm, but is used pretty regularly outside of his lands because nobody outside the most religious of the Beetle Tribe gives a shit
Brightpede poison: an extremely bitter, cyanide-based toxin that, like the death-herbs, can get one high if consumed in extremely small amounts. Secreted by pink and yellow-banded millipedes in the Deepnest region, used most commonly to kill political enemies or ease the passing of mortally wounded individuals. Harmlessly intoxicating to wyrms and their kin
Smokeweed: marijuana. It grows pretty much everywhere in Hallownest where greenery thrives, and is used both recreationally and medicinally, though the extent of it varies from culture to culture. Among the mantises, it's reserved only for strong warriors, to ease pain, battle-rage, and battle-lust. In the City of Tears, use is limited to smokehouses to prevent air contamination in close quarters, but is perfectly legal in private quarters, cheap to buy, and is typically recreational or therapeutic (there is, however, more variation in strains and expensive variants available to those of higher social rank, with the blooms grown in the White Lady's gardens going for the highest). In Deepnest, it's technically limited from the working castes to prevent injury, but is allowed during times of leisure and is unlimited to the injured or sick (if trade allows it). The Mosskin, Snails, and the Moths typically used it for religious reasons. Only the Hive have strict regulations against it (as they do with everything else).
Shrooms: Several species of mushrooms in Deepnest and the Fungal Wastes offer a variety of intoxicating and hallucinogenic effects, with a variety of different toxicity/fatality levels. Really only the Mantids know how to correctly harvest and identify each species responsible for each effect, a secret they hold closely guarded within their own tribe, but that doesn't stop certain individuals from different tribes to come in and sample the shrooms (and, if overdosed, become a fun little treat for the mantises)
The sap and nectar of the White Lady: really only attainable if you go praying to her for reproductive help, as it is an intense healing agent and potent aphrodisiac. Momentarily cures infertility, and brings about a high, but also induces heat. Tea can be made from her bark with similar (but less potent) effects, but again it must be provided from her willingly, and such examples are rare. Technically intoxicating, but only given to those struggling with infertility, miscarriages, suffering from injuries related to childbearing or birth, etc
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