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gay-dorito-dust · 2 years

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Hey I was wondering if you could do like Wednesday x fem yn but like Wednesday trying to tell mortica and gomez she has a gf and not knowing how they'd react and edin trys to help her and in the end they find out somehow you can pick if they take it good or bad but yea

A/n: I’ve seen this get asked to another person but I’m too proud of what I had already written to throw it away.

The crystal ball upon Wednesday’s desk taunted her with the impending call from her parents. Wednesday was something she hadn’t been in a long time; worried. The last time she had spoken with her parents, a lot had changed and one of the most recent and most prominent changes was that she had found herself a girlfriend.

How you met was the typical run of the mill meet cute, Wednesday was caught doing something she wasn’t meant to and she threatened to take your tongue, vocal chords and hands should you ever rat her out. Your response? “You’re beautiful.” Ever since then you had been constantly drawn to the chaos that was Wednesday Addams and not once has the thought of ever letting you go crossed her wicked mind. She was happy, a word she never thought she’d use in a lifetime but truly, for the first time in a long time she was happy. You made the insides of her hollow husk of a human vessel warm.

You lit a match and threw it upon her coal heart, setting it ablaze with the very foundations of life as the fires reflected in her dark eyes. You were her cara mia as she was your mon cher. For you Wednesday would die for you, kill for you, even live for you should you command it of her. It was moments like those that she began to see how alike she was to her father; Unhealthy obsessed with the object of their eternal attraction. So unhealthy in fact the pair might possibly be clinically insane with their love. However not even a highly facilitated psychiatric ward would be able to prevent Wednesday from coming back to you.

For she would have it burnt to the ground in your name as though she were a crazed religious fanatic, pleading her love to the only form of higher power that ever truly existed; You. If she had it her way, you’d both would’ve carved out and calcified your beating hearts for the other, to have and to hold until you were both cold and dead within the ground that would make up your grave. You would now and forever more belong to Wednesday as she would belong to you until the dark forces swelled you both whole; snuffing out your mortal flame for good.

So as Wednesday clamped down on her finger nails, bitting them right down to the nub and then some, Enid couldn’t help but feel concerned for her friend as she stared vehemently at her -seemingly- only form of communication with a look in her eyes. “What’s chomping you at the bit.” Enid asked, begrudging to know the answer but knew that Wednesday was in a situation where a friend was something that she could use right now. “My parents will be calling soon.” Wednesday merely said, not taking her eyes off of the crystal ball as though she was awaiting for it to go off.

“That’s great! Unless your relationship with them is questionable at best then that’s…not great.” Enid trails off when she began to notice that she wasn’t helping in making the situation any better even in the slightest. However the blonde wasn’t one to give up even in the face of adversity, Enid presses onward and upward. “My parents only sent me here to mold me in their image, to forge a carbon copy of themselves out of me by the time inn through with this place,” Enid stayed silent, “I get sent to the same dormitory my mother once resided, I have premonitions like she does.” Wednesday falls silent as her fists clenched in silent anguish.

“However I am not my mother, nor will I ever be like her because unlike her I have a heart to give and I gave it to y/n upon a moonlight night; the same night where the crows dropped dead before us and black dahlias bloomed by our feet.” Enid smiled warmly, remembering the twinkle in Wednesday’s eyes when she came back to the dome after her first official date with you down by the greenhouse. It was a dangerous twinkle but a twinkle none the less, Wednesday could’ve told her that you had a sparing match that ended with the tips of your blades poised at the others throat and the werewolf would’ve still somehow find it romantic.

“Now I am seemingly at an impasse with the illogical concerns of how my parents would react to me engaging in romantic circumstances with another girl, despite being well aware of their stances on societal demands.” Wednesday admitted, not use to feeling this vulnerable in front of another person but at this point in their relationship, Wednesday trusted Enid -despite how much of a gossip she could be- a smidge more then she did the rest of the student body that made up Nevermore. So if anything, this was Wednesday’s silent cry for Enid’s help and luckily she wasn’t overly dense to not notice.

“Wednesday,” Enid began as she moved over to stand by her friends’ side, “what your parents think shouldn’t reflect upon your relationship with y/n. You love her and she loves you, so why ruin a perfectly good thing by listening to what you parents think.” She places her hands on Wednesday’s shoulders and made sure that they were meeting eye to eye. “Never, not once, since I’ve came to know you had you given a shit about what others thought of you. So why give a shit now?” Wednesday has to admit, Enid was right. Why should she all of a sudden care when all she’s ever done thus far was deflect other peoples opinion on her. It made no logical sense but she guessed that now that you were in the picture with her; Wednesday worries about her parents perception of you.

Just as Enid was about to continue with her speech, the crystal ball went off and within the clear cut glass could the image of Gomez’ stout figure and Morticia’s taller frame could be seen as though they were actually trapped within the crystal itself. Upon seeing their daughter, Gomez and Morticia sat up straighter and smiled at Wednesday who only stared blankly at them, blinking slowly like a cat does when trying to convey their emotions to their owners. “There’s my little death moth, how’s Nevermore been treating you?” Gomez started as Morticia only took in her daughter’s expressions with a curious furrow in her brow but she didn’t speak upon it. Yet.

“Same as usual, however-“ “however you have found love, with a girl perhaps?” Wednesday straightened at her mother’s words. “How did you-“ “call it a mother’s intuition my dear death blossom.” Morticia’s unnerving voice cut her off as she looked to Gomez who was already looking at her, love sick. “Our daughter has found love Gomez, the ancestors must’ve blessed her already.” Gomez only grasped Morticia’s hand that rested on the chair arm tightly. “That’s amazing ‘tish, our little cope has found her forever mouse to play with until she too becomes a viper, until she becomes an Addams.” Wednesday perks up at this, her parents were indirectly giving you their blessing to marry her, to join your soul with hers as one until the end of your shared days.

Enid, still in the room, was trying her hardest not to squeal in excitement. Sure this event wouldn’t be until later down the line but she hopes she becomes your guys maid of honour.

#wednesday addams x reader #Wednesday Addams x you #Wednesday Addams fanfic #Wednesday Addams fic #Wednesday Addams imagines #Wednesday Addams imagine #wednesday x reader #wednesday imagine #Wednesday x you #Wednesday imagines #Wednesday fanfic #Wednesday fic

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andhumanslovedstories · 9 months

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I had a comfort care last night, an imminent patient who is basically non-responsive and has no family or friends we can find to be with them as they’re dying. So volunteer end-of-life vigil companions have been taking turns sitting with the patient, and tonight’s turned up, and I was like “hey I know you, you’re a nurse from four floors down and a building over. What are you doing here?”

And she was like, “this is my volunteering weekend!* This morning I was volunteering with the vet hospital at the humane society and tonight I’m sitting vigil. Tomorrow I volunteer at a community health clinic.”

(*please note that this is a Tuesday. Weekends are whenever you aren’t working.)

And I was like, “wow. That’s so amazing. Do you work part time?” hoping to get myself off the hook somewhat as I’ll often think to myself that I should volunteer somewhere, but I never have any time to do so since when I’m off work, I’m very busy with napping, playing video games, and getting weird about Columbo, and she was like, “no, I work full time and occasionally overtime since we’re so understaffed lately,” and I was like “ugh we’re SO understaffed haha right” and we chatted as two colleagues who unexpectedly ran into each other as I in the corner of my mind was overcome with the kind of awe and respect you feel for another person when you’re like “I need the good works you do to be less attainable so I stop feeling bad that I’m not doing them.” Unfortunately, the naps.

#care work is a career long marathon and buddy I’m walking it #nursing tag

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sleepanonymous · 5 months

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In light of recent events (that I fully missed and only caught the resolution of), I figured maybe I should drag this post out of my drafts instead of sitting on it like a coward.

TLDR: It’s important to respect the band, but it’s equally as important to respect your fellow fan’s wishes to not know Sleep Token’s identities.

(These two asks are from the previous drama, not what happened yesterday.)

I’ve had those 2 anon asks sitting in my inbox from that drama last month with a Tumblr user revealing Sleep Token’s names in a rant post because the guys did not unmask during/after the Wembley ritual. I hate to bring this back up but I feel guilty because I pretty much tossed a barrel of toxic waste onto that existing dumpster fire and walked away as everything exploded. I’d gotten back to everyone who DMd me and sent non-anon asks, but couldn’t answer these two. I didn’t want to publicly put that tumblr blog on blast because I did not want it to look like I was trying to instigate a witch hunt.

I had planned on ignoring these two asks since I had no way to DM the anon users, but figured I may as well use this as an opportunity to talk about something else: Sleep Token’s identities and respecting the band member’s wishes to stay anonymous.

Nowadays it’s nearly impossible to simply look up “Sleep Token” and not have the guy’s names and/or faces spoiled. It’s not your fault if this has happened to you, and you aren’t a bad person or disrespecting the band. Even if you looked up the information on purpose, that doesn’t make you disrespectful. It’s human nature to be curious, especially in regards to things that you love.

It’s okay if you know the names and faces of the member’s of Sleep Token. It is not okay to pass this information along in Sleep Token fan spaces, even if you disagree with the anonymity aspect or believe it’s just a gimmick. It is okay to be curious about the members and search for information about them online (such as old projects, public accounts, etc). It is not okay to harass them or their friends/family online (and yes, commenting “Worship” is harassment outside of Sleep Token’s official accounts). It is okay if you don’t find Sleep Token attractive after seeing their faces. It is not okay to hate on them or bodyshame them, especially in Sleep Token fan spaces. It is okay if you recognize the guys out in public, such as outside a venue. It is not okay to draw attention to them, take unsolicited photos of them, or approach them with anything other than respect.

The point I’m trying to make is that you can only be responsible for yourself. I am in a space where I regularly use Sleep Token’s first names, and relentlessly censor myself outside of that space to make sure I don’t accidentally namedrop. If I, an adult with ADHD and a 50 second attention span, can do this, so can you. Know that if you are refraining from openly sharing/spreading information about the band’s identities, you are not only respecting the Sleep Token’s wishes to remain anonymous, but you are also respecting countless other fans that are trying to avoid that same information for their own reasons.

It’s also important to remember there are people on the other side of the screen before sending hate. It’s easy to forget that a living, thinking, feeling, human reading what you’re saying. The best way to deal with people online who give you strong negative emotions is to block them and forget they exist.

If you’ve read this far then I just want to say that you’re amazing and I love you (especially if you’re my mutual or follower). You’re all truly the best community in this fandom. I hope you’re having/had a fantastic day. Forehead kisses and Large Mug Morning Espressos™ for all of you.

#sleep token #vessel sleep token #ii sleep token #iii sleep token #iv sleep token #vessel #ii #iii #iv #asks #answered #(technically)#sleepanon rant #i really cherish all of you #but i also understand if you disagree with what i've said in this rant #i'm also not trying to call anyone out #i've just had 80% of this sitting in my drafts for nearly a month #and it suddenly became relevant again

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rotworld · 3 months

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Hi there,

I want to rant about fetishes. I know I'm into the more violent stuff, and I'm pretty sure I know why (lifetime of self-hatred and trauma to boot), but recently I've been dabbling in the guro side of things and I feel ... guilty? Ashamed? Also idk how to filter guro so I only see the things that work for *me* (drowning, bruises, beatings) and not the other stuff (dec*pitation, graphic torture). At the same time I cant help but feel like I'm what's wrong with the world. Do you have any advice for me?

pretty heavy talk ahead. i’ll start with the advice and end with a personal anecdote if that’s useful.

i want to start by saying you’re not “what’s with the world.” there are a lot of reasons people seek out gore and graphic content. for some, it’s morbid curiosity and for others there is a fetish component. if you’ve been through something traumatic, i think there’s a draw to view violence from a “safe” distance as a form of catharsis. none of that makes you a bad person. but i also think it can cross very easily into a form of self-harm and become dangerous.

i don’t know you well enough to make assumptions beyond what you mentioned here. if you’re experiencing a lot of distress or discomfort, or feeling more negative about yourself, then you should stop seeking it out completely. it might be something that you view to “punish” yourself, or use to distract from other upsetting thoughts or feelings, especially if it’s something you’re looking for compulsively or extremely frequently.

i also recommend cutting back on real gore, especially videos, if that’s what you’re looking at. those will desensitize you the more you watch them, and you shouldn’t be desensitized to real human suffering. those people in “infamous gore videos” don’t exist in a vacuum, they’re real people with childhoods and families who went through horrible things, and now it’s on the internet forever. if you’re worried that you’ve already hit that point of extreme numbness and don’t feel what you should or don’t feel anything, you’ll be okay if you stay away from gore for a while. those feelings you thought you lost will come back. when they do, i’d maintain that distance. stick to simulated gore in fictional horror media like movies or games instead.

in the past, when people have approached me about having guilt or shame about their interests, i generally told them not to worry. there’s nothing wrong with having noncon fantasies, or enjoying horror-themed erotica. as long as you’re able to distinguish fantasy from reality and don’t impose those fantasies on people who don’t consent to being involved in them, you’re fine. i stand by all of that. but this is about gore specifically which i feel is a little different. morbid curiosity or interest isn’t unusual but you have to keep it healthy and responsible. even if it’s purely fictional gore that’s giving you this reaction, you should still stop viewing it. it’s not “silly” or “weak” to acknowledge the emotional response you’re getting from something.

now the personal anecdote. i started writing explicit guro in 2016 (shades of it had been in my work before then). i had just graduated, i was feeling really lost, adrift and desperate for community, and i was extremely online. i followed a few people who reblogged real gore and went looking for it outside of tumblr a lot too. i was obsessed. i think i told myself it was “reference” for my work but it had the catharsis and fetish element for me too. these horrible things happened to other people instead of me, i could revel in it safely from a distance. but it wasn’t “safe,” it was harmful. it was so far beyond “curiosity,” it was a fixation and a crutch. i looked at it so much that it stopped feeling real and i forgot that the people in those videos were people at all. it was just a blur of gruesome, awful shit all the time.

there wasn’t any single thing that made me stop. i think eventually it just wore on me too much. i wasn’t doing any of this stuff in moderation, i was online constantly, i was posting constantly, i was writing intense guro constantly. and there’s nothing wrong with making a lot of dark art, but i wasn’t engaging with any of my other interests or living my life much outside of it. i have boundaries i stick to for myself now. medical resources, roadkill, pictures people share consensually of their own injuries, things i might come across over the course of my normal life are fine. i don’t go looking for anything more extreme than that anymore, and i don’t even go looking for “acceptable things” all that often anymore. that kneejerk “god that’s awful” response that i’d lost is back. some people have a higher tolerance for this stuff than others, but i’m not “some people.” i know myself and i know what kinds of things i can become unhealthily reliant on and why, so now i’m much more careful. you know yourself best and you have to decide that for yourself, too.

#rotpeach answers

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blissfullyecho · 1 year

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Please make a part 2 of the things you don't believe in regards to the self-development community. You give the best advice and have the best insight about things I have never even thought about! Thank you!!!!

unpopular opinions i have on self-improvement (part 2) — get your pitchforks ready

1. i don’t believe in “being gentle with yourself” as an act of self care and personal development. if you are an extremist, then fine— but most people aren’t extremist and they use the “be gentle with yourself” advice to justify laziness. you’re not a little daffodil, you’re an adult human being with adult responsibilities. you being “gentle” with yourself is just you wanting to be babied all the time. get up, get moving.

2. you learning a language does not change the kind of person you are. whenever i search “how to improve myself” and one of the top tips is to learn a language, i scream. learning a language is a great skill to have for obvious reasons, but it doesn’t have anything to do with self-improvement. sure, you learned something new, but you didn’t change as a person. i speak 3 languages, yet i’m the same person. learning a new language is something you should do because you want to do it… not because the internet says it makes you a better person. all learning a language does is it makes you LOOK more well-rounded and traveled. and let’s be real, most of you are not well-traveled to begin with. let’s focus on REAL CHANGE, not facades.

3. journaling doesn’t help with everyone. i hate journaling— my hand hurts and it’s not like i’m going to read what i put down ever again. don’t feel obligated to journal if you don’t like it. i hate it and because i dislike it so much, journaling didn’t work for me. i DO know people like journaling and it helps them, so it’s not like i *don’t* believe in journaling, but i don’t believe it’s a necessity for everyone.

4. “you should forgive yourself”. nope. if you are over the age of 18, you have already learned what’s right vs. what’s wrong. everything you have in your life (after the age of 18) was and still is completely up to you. you chose the habits that led you up to where you are and you made the conscious effort to do so. this doesn’t apply to anyone that’s working on mental illness, but for the rest of you— why are you forgiving yourself? stop acting like you were brain dead before and you just now had an epiphany. we ALL are faced with choices to make everyday; you just didn’t care at the time and now you do. i’m not forgiving my past self for the mistakes i made because i made them consciously. i didn’t show up to my classes, i overate, i didn’t go to the gym, i didn’t study for that test, i didn’t look my best that day, etc. the things you do/don’t do are all choices. i’m not going to forgive myself. i fucked up, end of story. next.

5. “it’s okay to have bad days” advice is something i agree with but disagree with when it’s misused. what i agree with is that we are all going to have bad days. what i don’t agree with is using this as an excuse to not get anything done. i work on myself each day because i don’t have to feel a certain emotion to get what i need to get done. i don’t need to be in a good mood to go to the gym. i don’t need to be in a good mood to take a shower. it’s okay to be in a bad mood, but it’s not okay to use the “i’m just having a bad day” as an excuse to not get your stuff done and that’s where everyone misused the “bad day” advice.

6. this kind of ties in with #5, but i saw on instagram from this annoying “self love” page that we should normalize allowing children to stay home from school to have mental health days and adults being able to stay home from work to have mental health days. that is fucking stupid and it’s breeding victim mentality. coming from someone (me) who has been diagnosed with depression and anxiety, you don’t need a fucking mental health DAY. kids are at school and adults are at work for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. you mean to tell me you can’t prioritize your mental health around those 8 hours each day? your mental health days can be on your weekends— not on days where you/kids have a personal responsibility. this is the real world— your responsibilities will forever be there. you wanting to rest because you’re just not “there” today is not a reason for the world to stop because of you. your job needs you. your mental health does not matter to your coworkers who will have to carry on the extra workload for your “mental health day”. grow the fuck up. again, i’ve been there. it’s not like i haven’t gone through mental health issues before. but if your mental health is so deep, maybe you should stop working altogether and get on disability. that’s always an option.

i already know i’m going to get the “triggered girlies” coming for me on this post. save yourself the time and embarrassment writing me long paragraphs of me being “toxic” and how much i hurt your feelings. i’m a stranger to you— i should not hold that much power over you to be hurt like that lol.

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coraniaid · 10 months

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Most of the notes I made for myself while watching Passion were complaints or criticisms, but I do think it’s worth saying up front that I honestly love this episode. For all its flaws I completely agree with the popular critical consensus on this one: I think it’s a genuinely great episode of television. One of the best parts of the high school seasons and quite possibly the highest peak the show has managed to hit so far.

In a lot of ways it picks up where Innocence left off. Both episodes lean heavily into the metaphorical reading of the newly soulless Angel as an older boyfriend who turned out to be a creep after Buffy slept with him (“Don’t tell me,” says Joyce early on. “He's not the same guy you fell for.”). Both episodes work very hard to show us that Angel is not redeemable – first with the Judge last season declaring him “clean” of humanity, now with Angel killing Jenny. But Passion hits a little harder, I think, because there’s no counterpart to that rocket launcher scene. The good guys don’t get to enjoy even a partial victory here.

Other thoughts:

I think this is a surprisingly good episode for Joyce, in a way we don’t typically really get until Season 3. It hits the right balance between showing that Buffy and her mother struggle to communicate but that this doesn’t mean they don’t bother deeply care about each other. Buffy’s concern for her mother is paramount throughout the first half of the episode (and Giles’ insistence that she can’t tell her mother about being a Slayer is more than slightly hypocritical, given that we’ve already been told that his parents always knew about him being a Watcher).

Of course Joyce herself isn’t perfect – she doesn’t know the whole story, and yes Angel only tells her that he slept with Buffy because he knows Buffy well enough to anticipate Joyce’s reaction – but however bad The Talk goes it doesn’t feel like this really had as much of an impact as Angel would have been hoping for. It doesn’t seem to have really damaged their relationship. I believe Joyce when she says she loves Buffy “more than anything in the world” even if (she thinks) Buffy’s trying to shut her out. And I think this particular conversation, and the way Buffy can only say “you’re not” when her mother suggests she’s “grossing her out” is the sort of thing Season 5 is calling back to when, three years from now, Buffy will tell Giles that “my mom is gone … and I loved her more than anything … and I don’t know if she knew.”

(I think the shot of Joyce hugging Willow when they get the call from Giles is a nice touch too. That whole scene from Angel’s perspective is so good, isn’t it? The whole framing device with his voiceover too. It should probably be kind of cheesy, but it’s not. Maybe it helps that I just think Angel is a really fun villain.)

Speaking of that scene: everything between Willow and Jenny is so sad knowing what’s coming up later. I remember being slightly surprised, back in Season 1, that Willow didn’t seem to immediately warm to Jenny despite their mutual interest in computers (“how come she’s in the club?” she protested in Prophecy Girl). But I think the show has done just enough by the halfway point of this episode to make it seem credible that of all the Scoobies Willow in particular would be hardest hit by her death. (The juxtaposition of Willow being excited and eager to take over Jenny’s teaching responsibilities at the start of the episode and then how somber she looks when she is taking over for her at the end is particularly good.)

It rankles slightly, in the way I’ve complained about before, that the script still reduces Jenny to “Giles’ girlfriend” at times and that one of the reactions to her death – by somebody who knew Jenny! – is “poor Giles”. Nobody even thinks to suggest that Angel might have killed Jenny for some reason other than hurting her boyfriend. Equally Giles seems unnecessarily dismissive of Buffy’s concern about the fact that Angel has been sneaking into her room at night at the start of the episode. But the scene with Jenny’s boyfriend attacking Angel in the factory (after the rather complacent advice of “you mustn’t let Angel get to you. No matter how provocative his behavior may become”) and then Buffy coming to save him, giving up the chance to kill Angel herself to pull him out of the fire, is so good I’m almost persuaded to overlook it.

And the mere fact of Jenny Calendar’s death itself – despite the weird retcon about her past and the fact the show insists she betrayed the Scooby Gang while showing us she didn’t, despite the fact they bury her under a name she never used in the show, despite the fact that after this season ends Jenny’s name will only be spoken on screen twice, despite the fact it establishes the precedent that will later be used for any number of increasingly questionable ‘shocking’ deaths in the Buffyverse – despite everything, it’s still utterly heartbreaking.

Jenny isn’t the first recurring character the show’s killed off, but she’s the first recurring character of any significance (with apologies to Jesse and Principal Flutie). Or, I suppose, technically she’s just the first recurring character of any significance who dies and doesn’t get better. The first recurring character who won’t be coming back. The first recurring character that Buffy and her friends show any sign of missing. And the first recurring character that the audience will care about losing.

I just think this episode could have been even better if the writers themselves cared about Jenny Calendar at all.

#btvs #buffy rewatch 2023

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diorjadore · 2 years

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Hey! Quick PSA to the Vinnie Tumblr community.

I don’t hold authority or anything but I do have quite a lot of followers and I felt like this needed to be said: be kind. That’s it. Be kind to one another, to content creators here, or to literally anybody that you’re lucky enough to interact with.

Sending hate on anon is a cowardly thing to do and it makes the person receiving it feel shitty to the point where they don’t even want to open the app anymore. A lot have taken advantage of asking on anon that they feel they can say the most vile shit to someone and go on about their day as if they didn’t just cause emotional damage to another human being. Think about that, will you? How mean-hearted can one be to send shit to someone that they’re now left with the responsibility to deal with what you just said?

Vinnie Tumblr isn’t how it it used to be, haven’t you guys noticed? Old bloggers don’t even post anymore because this space has become so awful for them. I would like to assume they also got mean anons on their ask box that they didn’t feel the point in opening their blogs anymore because that’s the first thing they see: mean anons on their ask box and on their dash. Now who would feel motivated to be somewhere when that’s what you’re greeted with? And then people have the guts to ask why Vinnie Tumblr is so quiet.

I’ve said so much but hopefully you guys get the point. Don’t be the reason someone feels like ass. If you thrive off that then you don’t have anything to live for. I feel sorry for you. I know we all deal with a lot of personal shit and Tumblr may be an escape to that but somehow, someway, this turns into a bad place for them too. It shouldn’t be that way. This should be a place where everybody feels welcomed, safe, heard, and appreciated. Kindness goes a long way!

I hope this touches your hearts in some way and be reminded from time to time to be gentle and loving. I always say this but I’ll say it again! The world is cruel enough as it is, the least we can do is to be kind to one another.

Sending lots of kisses and hugs to my best friend, @vinschalamet! You make my days brighter.

Lots of love,

Ia 💓

#vinnie #vinnie hacker #vincent hacker #vhackerr #vinnie x reader #vinnie hacker x reader #vhackerr x reader #vinnie fanfiction #vinnie hacker fanfiction #vhackerr fanfiction #vinnie fanfic #vinnie hacker fanfic #vhackerr fanfic

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quotemenevervore · 2 years

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And immediately following that, part 10! Our manhunt boys are back!

Warnings: panic, soft, safe g/t vore, miscommunications

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~

Why NOW!?

They were in the middle of a manhunt, Dream getting pretty close to getting to the nether, and while he was hastily grabbing material with his group, his fucking instincts started acting up. His eyes had gone over to George, who was wrapping his arm up from his shield breaking on it, and instantly his mind had gone ‘get him to safety’. Bad caught the look he was giving the human, and he bet that the demon saw his eyes dilating, because he was tugged to the side for a moment to ‘share resources’.

“Are you going to be able to finish this game?” Sapnap was about to say yes, that they wouldn’t affect him that badly, but he could literally smell George’s blood from several feet away and his instincts had already started clouding his head. When several seconds went by without a response, Bad started to grab his communicator. “I’ll tell Dream that-“ “No! No, Bad, I’m fine. I’ll be fine. If it gets too bad I’ll distance.” He was given a very skeptical look, but the other was in no place to judge how well he could handle his instincts, so he relented with a sigh. “If it gets too bad, we call the game off. Say you’re not feeling good. Okay?” “Fine.” Sapnap rolled his eyes. “But it’s not gonna happen. I’ll be fine.”

Unbeknownst to him, his friend had caught the look he was sending his way, and as he finished the dressing on his arm, he entertained the thought.

~~~~

“Dream!” Sapnap yelled, narrowly missing slipping from the tree branch he clung to, glaring daggers at the other from where he’d jumped to the ground, avoiding the fall damage he should have gotten with a water bucket. The blonde only chuckled in response, taking off after teasingly waving to the fireborn.

The blackette groaned, carefully making his way back down. He shouldn’t have charged after Dream alone, and usually he wouldn’t pull those kinds of moves without a strong advantage. His head was foggy, and all he could rationally think of was ending the game sooner. The rest of it was just the instinctual haze pushing him to protect George, as Dream had made himself the threat in this case. As his feet hit the ground, he listened for any kind of movement around him, pinpointing soft footsteps to his right. Turning to face it, he watched as the last person he wanted to see emerged from the wilderness. “Since when do you take those kinds of risks?” “Since I wanted this game to be over.” He grumbled in response. George frowned, crossing his arms as if that hadn’t been what he was wanting. “Why? Usually you have fun with this.” “Well, maybe I’m just tired today and we left Karl to handle Kinoko Kingdom alone.” He snapped, which only resulted in the other’s frown to deepen. “Is it? Because that was never an issue before today.” “What do you want from me?” “The truth.”

Sapnap’s eyes focused on that bandage wrapped around his friend’s arm, the white cloth already tinged pink from the added exertion put on the limb. George’s eyes followed his, then looked back to his face. “Wow.” “What?” He looked back up at the other’s face. “Your pupils are really big. Did you hit your head or something?” “No.”

“Is it instincts, then? You keep looking at my arm.” When the fireborn made no move to deny it, he rolled his eyes. “I thought it was. You’re lucky I’m done with this game too.” The brunette dug through his inventory, pulling out a potion of shrinking. “Have you had that all game?” “Dream doesn’t make me empty my inventory out here anymore. We do at his base. Both of us carry one.” “Wait, we can’t do this. Sam and Antfrost don’t know, and Bad will kill me.” “Then make up something. Say I kept pursuing Dream. He’ll cover for me too when he realizes what’s going on.” Before Sapnap could say anything else, George had already started drinking the potion. With a groan, he walked over so he could catch the other when he shrank, scooping him up in his hand as he quickly did. “You and Dream both are starting to wear on me, you know that?” “Don’t act like you don’t enjoy this.” Well, he didn’t have a retort for that one. He gave a response in the form of popping his friend into his mouth with no warning, trying not to grin at the surprised yelp it pulled from him.

At the angry questioning he immediately got after, he mockingly hummed the other’s last sentence back to him, licking at him so he could send him down and get back to hunting Dream. Just having him in his mouth already started lifting the fog in his brain, and he was more than eager to get back to playing once George was tucked away. He did make sure to be careful with the smaller’s arm, unwilling to cause any more damage to his friend. When he was just getting ready to send him back, he heard him yell. “I assure you I’m soaked through with spit. Just swallow me already.” In retaliation, he swiped his tongue across the other’s face, resulting in a flurry of angry movement and words that had him barely holding back laughter. Finally, he pushed the brunette back, swallowing once he fell still to keep himself from choking. Even when shrunken, his friend was slightly lanky, and he had to swallow again to fully send him down. A small purr began to build up in his chest, and he sighed as he felt clarity in his mind once more.

His ears picked up the sound of a twig snapping, and he whirled around only to make eye contact with Sam. Sam, who didn’t know about his storing ability and instincts, and was looking at him with slightly widened eyes. Sapnap was frozen, his own eyes widening in shock and horror, unable to think of anything other than the panic he felt even as George finally landed in his storage and settled in. Or, was settling in before he caught on to how tense everything around him was. “Pandas?” He wasn’t sure what was going on but something was seriously bugging his friend.

“Sapnap?” “Sam, I can explain.” He felt George also freeze when the sentence was said. The creepertaur took a step back, and in a panic he charged him, somehow knocking him onto his back so he couldn’t run. He pulled himself back from the other, sitting on his chest to keep him down. “Stop, don’t run, he’s fine. I didn’t kill him.” “Really? Cause I know what I saw.” “Obviously you don’t. You and Antfrost weren’t supposed to find out, especially not like this…” he groaned, dragging his hands through his hair and silently cursing his dad for being right. “Then what did I just watch you do to George?” He demanded, smoke starting to slip out from his mouth, and the fireborn sighed. “Ask Bad if you don’t believe me. People from the nether have storage stomachs, it’s to protect their kids and treasure from the Nether’s environment. I get instincts based on it, and Dream and George help me with them. They weren’t supposed to act up today.”

He watched the other’s expression, hoping against everything that he could convince the other that George was safe and to not tell Bad or Antfrost. The other looked up at him, carefully considering his words, before he asked a question. “Is this what happened the first time we found out about the potions?” “I had to store Dream to get him out of the nether safely, yea.” The other still looked unconvinced under him, and a new voice joined the clearing. “He’s not lying, Sam.” Sapnap turned to the mask-clad man, watching him walk over. He didn’t appear to have anything on him, but upon seeing the confused look he got, he explained. “Bad told me to call the game off. I guess he figured out what was going on.” “He saw me getting bad earlier. I thought I could get through the game, but..” He shrugged, looking down to the creepertaur beneath him. An unreadable expression came to his face, but at least smoke had stopped curling into the air around them. Finally, he spoke. “Kind of wish you would have said something before you got caught.” “You weren’t supposed to find out.” Dream tugged at the fireborn’s shirt, pulling him off the other. “Sam, I know the kind of biology you have. You can’t get mad because Sapnap does it too.” Sapnap froze, looking between the two for a moment. “You have a storage stomach?” “A first stomach. It can hold things safely but it’s just to store extra food.” Dream crossed his arms, and Sam had the decency to look embarrassed. “But I also get instincts. I don’t know how it relates to my species, but sometimes I deal with them too.” “You help him with it too?” “Yeah. It took him forever to admit it though. Wonder who that reminds me of.” The ravenette slammed his elbow into the other’s ribs, and as he doubled over Bad rushed out of the foliage, looking over the group and going wide-eyed realizing who was missing before turning to Sam. “I don’t know if anything’s been explained-“ “He knows, Bad.” The man in question snapped his head towards him. “Sapnap, you told me you’d be okay!” “I thought I would be! George came to find me.” The demon pressed a hand to his forehead, letting out a frustrated sigh. “I think they’re spoiling you.” “If Dream and George stop you know my fiancés won’t.” “I know!” He groaned, and Dream laughed. “Why would I stop?” “Well, at least we know how to punish you now.” Sam said, sitting on his legs in a way that reminded the group of a cat. “What about if you want to punish me, warden?” Sapnap teased. “I’d punish you by storing you.” “Jokes on you, I’ve been stored already.” “Not recently, though.” Bad chuckled, and the fireborn’s mouth slammed shut as he realized his error. “Sapnap?” Dream quietly questioned beside him. Bad had stopped laughing fairly quickly upon seeing the other’s reaction, looking confused. The ravenette took a deep breath, getting ready to explain despite knowing it wasn’t his place, but Bad beat him to it as recognition flashed across his face. “Oh! Was that what Quackity had been talking about?” “What!?” Dream exclaimed, whirling to face the other. “Look-“ “Really!?” George laughed from his storage stomach, and Sapnap could feel his face start to burn. “Oh… I’m sorry Sapnap. I-“ Bad attempted to apologize for blurting it aloud, but the fireborn waved him off, pulling out his communicator. “What are-“ “You’re apologizing to the wrong person.” Dream started laughing at the implications, and Bad’s eyes widened. “Wait hang on-“ “Sapnap!!!!” The Mexican’s voice played over the speakers, and the demon raised a hand to his mouth, looking down.

“Hey Q. I know you’re at work, I just need to tell you something.” “What? Your game end badly or something?” “You can say that. Uh, I haven’t talked to you about the idea of others knowing about the crop thing, I didn’t really think I needed to because it wasn’t my thing to reveal. But, um…” Unmistakable laughter crackled over the speakers, but it wasn’t his fiancé’s. “Is that Wilbur!?” Dream cracked up even more. “Private conversation, Soot.” A door slammed shut, and the avian sighed. “Who knows, Sapnap?” There wasn’t fury in his tone, but he could tell the other was upset by the news. “Bad accidentally revealed it. He realized that that time you went to him for advice ended up with you figuring out the instinct thing.” “I’m sorry Quackity!” “It’s- okay, it’s fine. I mean, more people were bound to find out anyway. I just wanna know who.” “Bad, Dream, George, and Sam. I… don’t know where Antfrost is but I don’t think he heard it.” “Oh, no, Antfrost had to go. I told him the game was off and he told me to tell you guys he had to leave.” “Just those four?”

“Oh fuck.” George suddenly said from within him. He hummed, acknowledging him without it being obvious to the others, as they continued speaking to the man on the phone. “You said that Quackity went feral once. Did.. Did he store you while he was feral, Sapnap?” He cringed, and the others suddenly got concerned. “Everything okay, Sap?” Dream gently tapped his hand with his own, and the other two gave their own worried questions. “Hey! What’s going on, I can’t see!” Quackity yelled, and Sapnap just groaned. “George figured something out. Quackity, how much do you want the group to know?” “What did he figure out?” “Instincts.” “Oh fuck.” The slight panic in his fiancé’s voice made him wish he’d decided to do this talk in private. He’d collected himself before giving an actual answer. “Yeah, you can tell them about that. Sam’s probably got a good idea on it too, honestly.” “Oh, about how he zones out in his office?” “Little more complicated than that. Uh, I used to ignore my instincts, and tried to hide them and all traits of me being a hybrid. Thanks to that,” his voice took on a sarcastic tone for that line, before returning to seriousness. “When my instincts do act up, I… it practically takes me over. That’s why a lot of the time it seems like I refuse to let people come see me or I kick people out early.” “And why you let Wilbur up there all the time?” “You LET Wilbur up here all the goddamn time!” “You never kick him out.” Sam pointed out. “Oh I kick him out alright. Right out the goddamn window.” He scoffed. “Besides, he’s an avian hybrid too. The first time he caught me trapped in that weird fucking haze in the office he offered to help me. It’s nice to talk to someone who knows what you’re dealing with without the threat of being fucking executed on their doorstep.” Dream whistled at that. “He’s still mad?” “Techno never fucking stopped being mad!” They heard a door open, and shortly after the laughter of the other man had returned. “You should have seen his face when you began that topic, Sapnap. He had you on speaker.” The revived man almost laughed more than spoke. “I’m about to kick your ass out of my office if you keep this shit up.” Quackity growled, the Brit tsking in response. “Temper, temper.” “Sapnap, I will see you at home, okay? I love you.” “I love you too, Q.” He ended the call, huffing as the group started laughing at the events that transpired.

He glared at the blonde closest to him, debating using the other splash shrinking potion he had to make him stop, but Bad and Sam were likely to stop him. “I thought it was kinda weird he would keep certain people up there for hours and other people less than five minutes. He kicked Tubbo out almost immediately when he’d come to see him but demanded Slime’s presence quickly afterwards.” “I’m just glad he’s found people he can go to too.” Sapnap sighed. He’d gotten a little worried when Quackity stopped storing him and Karl as much, worried he was pushing his instincts off again. He knew Karl got scared when their other fiancé got to that point of feral, and he definitely didn’t like it either. At least that weight removed itself off of his shoulders. “This has been a fucking day.” He groaned, flopping down to the ground. George swore as he tumbled due to the fall, trying to settle back down. “Language.” He was chided by his father, who also sat down. Dream laid back beside the fireborn. “How’s Gogs?” “He’s fine. Settled down.” “Figured he would. He sleeps all the damn time.” “Watch it, Dream. He’s still mad at you.” The masked man winced, and Sapnap just barely caught a glimpse of it on the side of the other’s face. “Relationship drama? Dang,” Sam idly spoke. Sapnap tried not to laugh as his friend sputtered a defense, sitting back up to glare at the creepertaur.

“Are you done moving?” The shrunken snapped, causing the fireborn to roll his eyes, humming a soft ‘mhm’ as he draped his arms across his torso and let his eyes fall closed. He hadn’t meant to, but he wound up drifting off to the sounds of his friends playfully arguing.

~ ~ ~

He stepped into the door and was about tackled right back out by the avian, both landing on the porch with a loud thud and a pained groan from Sapnap. “What the hell took you so long?” “George wouldn’t wake up so I could let him out.” Quackity sat up, looking down at him with a confused look. “I thought you didn’t store people during manhunts?” “Normally I don’t. My instincts got bad and George singled me out knowing that. Bad forced Dream to cut the game short pretty quickly afterwards.” “Buzzkill.” He mumbled, climbing off so he could pull the fireborn to his feet. “How the hell did Bad even figure out the instinct thing anyway?” “What instinct thing?” Karl joined the duo at the doorway, smiling at the two. “Bad fucking told everyone about my instincts.” The avian huffed, crossing his arms as he leaned against the house. “Oh shit. Did that go over okay?” “Sapnap called me and had Wilbur cracking up while I was trying to do my work.”

“The four I was with took it okay. Antfrost left early, so he still doesn’t know. Apparently Sam’s got a storage stomach too, but it’s more like a crop than an actual brooding pouch.” “So how did Bad figure it out? I thought you hadn’t told him?” Karl inquired. “I didn’t. I guess he somehow put it together-“ “Sam said he’d store me as a punishment. I told him it wouldn’t intimidate me because I’ve been stored and Bad realized I wasn’t talking about me as a kid.” “Oh.” Quackity’s shoulders slumped, and Sapnap was ready to start apologizing again, but then the avian opened his mouth once more. “And George? How’d he find out about the instinct shit?” “Oh shit, I never told you about that.” “About what?” The fireborn tugged lightly at the other’s arm, Karl letting them enter the house. “You’re gonna wanna sit for this.”

When he’d finished telling Quackity the events that led to him accidentally revealing his first time shrinking to George, the avian frowned at him. “You know, you’re really shitty at keeping secrets.” “I’m sorry.” He said as sincerely as he could. “I didn’t think it would get to this point.” The ravenette sighed, taking the other’s hands into his own. “I can’t stay mad at you for that. I can stay mad at Bad and George, though.” Sapnap chuckled, tugging at the hands in his own until the hint was gotten and the other hugged him.

“Hey guys?” Karl entered the room, holding his communicator. “What’s up?” “Dream wants to talk to us.” The fireborn looked confused, and Quackity gave a drawn-out sigh. “What the hell does he want?” “Nice to talk to you too, Quackity.” Dream responded, looking over at the brunette sitting on the sofa, who scoffed and rolled his eyes upon realizing what he was up to. “So me and George have an idea.”

#mcyt g/t #mcyt vore #mcyt gt #shrunken manhunt #safe vore #soft vore #g/t vore

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they-are-a-prolife-autist · 2 years

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I was very very depressed in 2020. I remember going on a date, and having unprotected sex once during this period. During the act, I remember feeling like I didn't matter, that I wasn't in my body, I just wanted to die.

I didn't get pregnant that time. I tried to kill myself the day after, and since then have not had sex and I'm learning to be better about my boundaries and my self worth. But everyday I feel so ashamed about having put myself in that situation. I still struggle with depression and suicide.

What I wanted to ask you was, if I had gotten pregnant what should I have done? I'm so scared that any potential children of mine would inherit my family's mental illness, which I would never wish on anyone let alone someone I'm supposed to care for. I feel like an abortion would have been merciful, and yet also a sin? Life is supposed to be a gift, but... I truly wish I had never been born.

Everyday I think back and wish I had made better choices. I feel so responsible for what could have happened that night, and I'm just left so confused and ashamed.

Sorry if this is just bothering you, I was hoping I could hear your opinion (even though you're probably going to think that I'm a terrible person)

Anon you aren’t a bother. I don’t think you’re a terrible person. Everybody has their own baggage to carry and it is not my place to judge you harshly. God knows I have my own trauma and guilt to manage without making yours my business. ♥️ my page is a safe place for you, and my DMs are open.

I understand depression, suicidal thoughts and attempts, feeling like you shouldn’t have been born. Anon, you and I both are whole, complex, beautiful human beings and we deserve to live full lives regardless of the mistakes we have made and the trauma we have suffered.

I can’t look into your past and give you advice on the foolproof way to handle that hypothetical. I don’t even know what I would have done if my molester had gotten me pregnant in my teenage years. People in desperate, dangerous situations oftentimes will make bad choices. I think the important thing is, it didn’t happen. I can only say that there are crisis pregnancy centers, organizations, charities, and churches that revolve around providing help for situations where a pregnancy does occur. For anyone reading this who is in a desperate situation I would encourage to look into those options and reach out for help because someone will help you. You are loved, you’re still precious, you aren’t used or broken or ugly and I understand the shame, but it’s a lie.

I also feel the fear of passing on my flaws to my children. I catch myself wondering if they’ll be depressed like me? If they’ll be autistic and suffer because of it? I worry about all the wrong in the world that could affect my future children and I find myself panicking and wanting to protect them from that. The thing is, everyone is flawed. Everyone has to live in a broken world and write their own story. Everyone has to struggle with doing their best not to hurt themselves or others with their choices. I think that’s part of why human beings are social creatures. We are meant to help each other, support each other, and at times… we’re meant to restrain each other from making bad decisions. It’s important to have a trusted community around you who loves you and who can help you when the brokenness of the world is too much to bear alone.

However, ending the life of a vulnerable human being to prevent them from experiencing life isn’t a mercy though. I think I speak about this in my pinned post. I’ve experience great trauma. I was poor, abused, I’ve been shot at, I’ve attempted suicide… I also play the piano. I have two cats that I love. I read. I write. I like to dye my hair. I have a life beyond what I have suffered and I think that you do too. Us survivors (of whatever we have survived) are more than our suffering. It took me a long time to be glad I was alive, to build up dreams of the future, to look forward to anything… but it happened. There is hope and light at the end of the tunnel.

Below is a picture of my brothers and sisters and I. Our lives have been pretty fucked up, and you can see bruises on my arms (middle in the blue shirt). But- this picture still brings me so much joy because it reminds me I still lived. And, if nothing else, I still have six other somethings to live for.

#my dms are wide open

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majorbaby · 2 years

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Please, I need to get this off my chest. Charles has always upset me... he is constantly talking about how much better he is than everyone and sometimes he says white supremacist things :/ and in a deep way because he isn’t just racist towards Klinger! He also thinks he’s better than Radar by calling him a bumpkin. It really annoys me when people ignore that part of him or try to write him as this misunderstood, lonely man

i'm iffy about commenting on how people write characters/ships they wanna write, especially when it comes to less popular ones like Charles because I generally believe in "don't like don't read" buuuut I also think it's so interesting to see what dominant trends emerge from fandom because fandom is a legitimate creative, communal space so we should note our observations and critiques in a respectful way. But anyway, my response is more about the general portrayal of the character and the flaws you've brought up because I think you raise an interesting point, I assume that you made it in good faith, and I’m very into discussions about race and racism in media but particularly wrt MASH. Cut to spare people who aren’t into this and CW for white supremacy and all -isms ingrained in it:

Winchester is kept in check to some degree by being consistently positioned on the moral low ground, BJ and Hawkeye get the better of him constantly and whenever he makes a prolonged target out of anyone it’s usually Hawkeye and BJ which you could still call classist and how bad it lands depends on what you imagine Hawkeye and BJ’s backgrounds to be. They’re not implied to be from high society themselves but we don’t know much more than that. You’re not supposed to admire the nastier parts of Charles’ sensibilities and the show makes that overwhelmingly clear imo, he’s not a straight villain the way Frank was but he’s still an antagonist. Later on I think Rizzo gets the better of Charles a few times and that’s very satisfying to watch. There’s an interesting inversion of power dynamics when you look at Potter and Winchester. Charles looks down on Potter for his social background and Potter takes a lot of glee in reminding Charles that while he’s in the army he’s to be under Potter’s heel. Which, like, go ahead, eat each other.

Winchester also gets a lot of moments that (imo, successfully) “humanize” him and it’s fair to feel uncomfortable about that if you perceive Winchester to be a white supremacist which, yeah, I can’t pretend I don’t ever see it – DOS has a remarkably smooth delivery that softens the blow but oof some of the things he says. In Mail Call 3, Margaret is concerned about not being good enough for Donald’s family and she opens up to Charles about it, he makes this comment about eugenics – I think he actually uses the phrase “maintain the integrity of the breed”. And while my brain knows that I’m supposed to empathize with Margaret here and not Charles, I can’t help it if my skin crawls. He calls her good breeding stock and tells her that it’s of utmost importance to the Winchesters and the Penobscotts that they “Maintain the characteristics of the bloodline” like that’s… that’s a white supremacist talking point. So be assured I see where you are coming from. And I have to talk about Klinger: “Klinger whatever happened to your frivolous, pet-like demeanor” yikes. Charles isn’t the first person to say racist things to Klinger, talking down to him for laughs becomes a frequently relied-upon gag in the later years, Potter and Margaret do it a few times. Hawkeye and BJ and even Radar have their iffy moments as well, but it sounds different coming from them than it does from Winchester, in part because he’s made other comments (like the one with Margaret) before that that suggest a much darker belief system – ‘suggest’ might be too weak a word.

We also get glimpses into how the social systems he subscribes to and benefits from actually oppress him too – which is true to life. But how much you care about that sort of thing will depend very much on how you feel about the character in general.

I don’t think Winchester gets a straight “redemption arc”, he’s just portrayed as being a three-dimensional character, for better or for worse. And look, it sucks to have to think of your political enemies and threats to your existence as three-dimensional people – I know I don’t on a day-to-day basis. I think this was a choice on the part of the showrunners after seeing how things played out with Frank Burns, who some people believe should’ve also been more three-dimensional – you can’t really win with a character like that. I’ve seen people say they prefer Burns to Winchester and I’ve never understood that until this moment lol, because Charles being less cartoonish has allowed me to actually enjoy him. But now I see how one might be more comfortable with a character like Burns because he’s such a butt monkey and he doesn’t get a single redeeming moment that he doesn’t immediately ruin. I guess we know that Burns just ‘wants to be liked’ but I don’t think that garners a terrible amount of pity from anyone – any Frank Burns sympathizers in the audience?? I didn’t have the Burns-Winchester transition on my list of contributing factors to the show’s shift to the political center but you know what, that might actually be a thing: Burns being portrayed as a straight villain vs. Winchester (who is much more well off than Burns it would seem) being portrayed as multifaceted. I’m more or less neutral when it comes to these redeeming moments when they happen between Charles and Margaret, who has her own racism to deal with – and I can’t think of many other occasions aside from the one I described where he was overtly misogynistic to her – although the one example I did give was pretty egregious. Or Charles and Hawkeye or Charles and BJ because as I said about Margaret and them a few days ago, they’re closer to one another on the ladder. It’s really a class issue when it comes to them and that’s not something to be ignored (I don’t care at all for how Charles treats Radar and Rizzo who are both from non-urban, implied to be poor, backgrounds and who are of significantly lower rank in the army) but again, it really depends on how you feel about Hawkeye and BJ’s respective backgrounds and whether or not you think their pranks on him constitute appropriate retribution. I think if you are going to humanize a less-than-savoury character, a good way to do that is to show how their belief systems are to everyone’s detriment, including their own. Charles does go through this a few times: he realizes his discriminating against Honoria’s Italian husband will drive a wedge between him and his sister, similarly his self-imposed separation from the “unworthy” Hawkeye has kept them from perhaps being friends and he calls himself on it in Sons and Bowlers and finally he seems to really be at war with himself over his own lifestyle choices in Foreign Affairs.

There is also a wrong way to do it – please miss me with his calling Klinger “Max” in Death Takes a Holiday, where the narrative wants me to accept that this is some grand gesture on Charles’ part after he’s been a racist twat to Klinger on multiple occasions and gleefully takes up any opportunity he can to remind him how inferior he thinks Klinger is. This same thing is actually done much more effectively in Sons and Bowlers (...”Hawkeye”) 1) Charles has actually spent the episode doing a lot more for Hawkeye than this single gesture at the end 2) I’m just gonna say it lol, Hawkeye is white so things land differently. Hawkeye is an equal, Klinger is "the help". I’m just pointing these things out, not trying to convince you of how you should or shouldn’t feel about Charles. Ultimately it’s up to each person to decide for themself what they will and won’t condone. I would suggest observing how that plays out when it comes to different characters. Are you uncomfortable with Charles’ notions on the family unit while at the same time being unbothered by BJ’s? Do you forgive the one-off joke from Hawkeye about BJ’s 16-year-old babysitter but get up in arms over Henry In Love? Do you have something to say about Aggie’s pursuit of BJ but nothing about Margaret’s full-fledged relationship with Frank (and btw why do we not keep the same energy for cheating men as we do for the women they are cheating with??). I’ll end by saying what you let slide vs what you don’t is a deeply personal thing. Mulcahy hits me in a certain way because of the particular chip I have on my shoulder, but at the same time I don’t have any issue with other people’s enjoyment of him. At some point you will have to look the other way on something because no character is perfect and they all uphold some fucked up standard in one way or another. What is important imo is being able to identify what kind of messaging a story intends for you to accept and if you want to take it a step further, consider if there are any harmful ideas it might be perpetuating.

#meta #charles meta #replies #anonymous #race on mash

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wisteria-lodge · 2 years

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bird primary + lion secondary (prepwork model)

Hey. I’m sorry; I know you have a lot of these, but I’ve taken the SHC test so many times I’ve figured out roughly what answer corresponds to what house, so I’m afraid that’s skewing my results. I’m not going to stop debating with myself until I at the very least write something down and possibly get someone else’s insight into it. Feel free to delete/ignore if you’re overwhelmed.

oooh this is going to be fun. Because you sound so much like a Bird primary. But that permission to delete/ignore. That’s usually evidence of some Kant-adjacent morality system that really, really, really stresses free will. Which usually skews Lion primary.

You should probably bear in mind that I’m severely depressed, I have serious executive dysfunction issues, and I’m undoubtedly burned.

Got it.

First, my primary. The one thing I’m certain I’m not is snake–I find the idea of building a morality primarily around my loved ones so alien that I have trouble envisioning it as a form of morality at all. It feels more like amorality to me. So unless I’m fried to a crisp and self-hating, no snek here. (Sorry, sneks, you’re lovely people, but you do baffle me somewhat.)

The way you’ve put that is very, very Bird. That is a response Birds have when they meet Snakes “But you just value your people? That’s so... easy and straightforward.”

I like badgers’ equity and humanitarianism, but I have stormed out of multiple communities because I either thought they were founded on unjust ideals. Moreover, I’m proud of having done it.

oooh someone’s an idealist.

or some of the central community members were bad people. (I’ve also lost friends because I refused to back down when I knew I was right.)

Oh that’s intense. Just dropping a value judgement like BAD PEOPLE in there. I hope you tell me what you mean by that, because depending on how you answer, that could make you a very intellectualizing sort of Lion.

I think that (probably???) narrows it down to bird and lion.

Yep.

As for how I come to my morality, I like to think I base all my morals on Logic and Reason™, but doesn’t everyone think their way of looking at the world is logical?

They do, but they define “logical” differently. The slightly disparaging formation of “Logic and Reason™” makes me think you’re in a place where “Logic and Reason™” is what you’re *supposed* to do.

I’m not at all sure that it’s true. I have a deep, emotional connection to my ideals in a way that feels very lion (though of course birds can be passionate too, adding another layer of confusion) and makes me worry that maybe I’m just basing them on vibes and they don’t stand up to scrutiny.

You’re either a Bird, or you have intense Bird influences in your life.

I do subject them to scrutiny, but I’m always worried I’m not being rigorous enough or that my justifications are just excuses. I CAN change my mind, though; it just takes the right argument/circumstances. Sometimes my mind changes in an instant; other times it does so gradually.

This could all be either Lion or Bird... except for changing your mind gradually. In my experience, Birds will have a MOMENT where they change like “the moment I stopped being a homophobe.” Lions sometimes do, but that whole changing-your-mind-without-realizing is a Lion thing. Lions also get delayed reactions. They change their mind (subconsciously) and it kicks in a little later.

(and of course every human person backslides, but that’s something different.)

To elaborate more on how I relate to my ideals, I’ve been to 15-20 protests over the past year and a half. I’ve been to every kind, from the ones where you chill on the corner holding a sign to the… uh… spicy ones. I paste stickers and posters about my political beliefs everywhere I go. The other day, I was putting up posters, and I met a guy who’s been tearing them all down. I proceeded to spend an hour arguing with him until I could slip away and put up my posters again. I’ll argue with anyone about my morals. I once broke my nose while running from the cops at a protest. I feel like that’s relevant information?

I’m thinking what we have going on is a Bird primary and an INTENSE Lion secondary, which is probably where you’re getting your false positive “feeling are FEELINGS” response from. Like you *are* analytical, the way you write is analytical. Also, I’m not entirely sure a Lion could have written a whole post without at least giving a hint about what their political beliefs actually were.

As for my secondary, again, the one thing I’m sure I’m not is snake. I’m not INCAPABLE of lying, but I hate to do it, and I dislike misrepresenting myself. I want to be the same person all the time, everywhere, if I can.

Lion. Loud Lion.

I’m not sure whether I improvise more or fall back on my tools more. I mean, doesn’t everyone do a bit of both?

Pretty much everyone models something. It’s more fictional characters where you see the just one secondary, nothing else thing going on.

I collect some tools–or try to–because I think they’ll be useful, or just for fun. I try to have a plan when doing important things. But my plans usually aren’t super detailed, and I often fail to stick to them regardless.

You’re not a Prep-work secondary. You may MODEL one, sometimes, as most people do.

I’m wildly inconsistent when it comes to my hobbies. Note that until relatively recently, when I was diagnosed with and medicated for ADHD, I was flat-out incapable of consistency. But I’m not even consistently inconsistent; I’m consistent with some hobbies and inconsistent with others. For example, I crochet every day, but I go weeks without playing video games and then play them for 10 hours at a time. I’d LIKE to be consistent, but I just can’t seem to manage it.

This is probably partially ADHD stuff, sure. But I’m also reading a narrative where you maybe think you should, or are supposed to be consistent with your hobbies? Because you absolutely don’t. Doing something intensely, only when you feel like it, is completely fine.

I study… poorly, despite school being important to me. I frequently cram for exams. I hate to do it, but I can’t seem to do it any other way.

You’ve got some executive dysfunction issues going on. (You’re also using the last minute adreneline to hack your brain into focusing on a non-preferred task, which is classic ADHD coping mechanism.)

I can justify it to myself because, in the real world, nobody cares how you do things as long as you get them done. As long as you have the relevant knowledge and skills, it doesn’t matter whether you got them via studying a little every night or via studying at 3:00 AM on the day of the test.

You may want to experiment with ways of studying that are not the standard Badger thing. There are many, many ways to do ALL of this.

My friends have called me a “walking ominous positivity post.” You know, those posts that are like, “You WILL get better. You have no choice”? I’m the mom friend, but in kind of a shouty way. I’ve been known to yell at people to eat, or sleep, or hydrate. I offer to fight anyone or anything that makes my friends sad. I threaten people with affection.

Lions secondaries are rather fantastic, aren’t they?

I feel like parts of this seem very Double Lion, but parts also seem very Bird??? I’m not sure what to make of myself. Anyway, thanks for your time. Take care of yourself! Don’t forget to take a break if you’re overwhelmed!

A very intellectual Lion primary is I guess possible, but all the vibes I’m getting are super SUPER bird.

#submission #shc #wisteria sorts #sortme #bird vs lion primary #lion secondary

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slugbugmug · 2 years

Text

Mistakes Were Made Chapter 3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 4

Rating: Explicit

Summary: A spontaneous night of drinking after a mission leads to an awkward morning after.

AO3 tags: Mistakes Are Made, Drunken sex, Awkward morning after, Mistakes, Unprotected Sex, Morning After Pill, Angst with a Happy Ending, Loss of Virginity, Slut Shaming, Self-directed slut shaming, Vaginal Sex, Soul and Maka are bad at communicating

Read on AO3

“Okay, we’re all checked out. Let’s head to the roof.” Maka said, gesturing towards the elevator. She just wanted to get home. Maybe if she was at home, things would feel normal again and she could look at Soul again.

This was one of the most stressful mornings she had ever had and she just wanted to go to sleep. She felt immensely relieved after taking the Plan B, but she was pretty sure that she wouldn’t be entirely comfortable until her period came. It was due in just a week, so she hopefully wouldn’t have to live with this uncertainty for too long.

When they got to the roof, Maka held out her hand towards Soul. “C’mon, let’s get home. Transform!”

He grabbed her hand and dissolved into light. His soft human hand was replaced by the firm metal of his scythe form. It was comfortingly familiar, after a morning of unfamiliarity. Smooth, long … and heavy?

Soul’s scythe form went crashing down with a clatter as she could no longer hold the weight of him upright.

“Hey! What the fuck?” Soul yelled.

“Sorry!” She readjusted her stance and tried to lift him again. He didn’t budge. “You’re too heavy!”

Through their connection, weak as it currently was, she could feel that they both came to the same understanding at the same moment. Soul transformed and sat cross legged on the cement floor.

“So that sucks.” He said simply

They couldn’t resonate. What they had done had fucked up their connection so bad that their souls were not longer in sync. This hadn’t happened for years, not since the Werewolf incident in London. At least he didn’t burn her this time.

She stayed standing, not looking at him. “Yeah.”

"Sorry." He said, for what felt like the hundredth time that day.

"It's not your fault." Her response was automatic, thoughtless.

"Sh-should we try again?" He twisted his fingers in the hem of his shirt.

She sighed. “I don’t think it would help. I don’t know. I don’t know if I can resonate with you right now.”

The look on his face made her heart ache. He didn’t deserve having to deal with someone as fucked up as she was.

“How’re we gonna get home then?” He asked, still sitting on the cement, dejected. Maybe they would have to talk, to work through this. Sex couldn’t be the thing that killed their partnership, not after everything they went through together.

Maka pulled out her compact mirror. “We get a plane ticket, I guess.”

Soul grimaced. “You aren’t gonna tell Kid that we –”

“No! Of course not.” The idea made her want to jump out of her skin. “I’m just going to tell him we went out drinking and are too hung over. Which is partially the truth.” She rubbed her temple, soothing the dull ache of a headache she had had since she woke up.

"Yeah." He nodded. "That makes sense."

She turned away from him as she wrote the number for the Death Room on the mirror and he felt nauseous.

This was going to be a hard thing to fix.

It wasn’t that they didn’t talk while they took the cab to the airport. They discussed the weather, and the fact that Soul should remember to get some Dramamine from the ubiquitous airport shops because he always forgot that he got planesick, even though it happened every time. When they got to the airport, they sighed and complained about security and argued about how to get to their gate.

But it was different.

When Maka went in the wrong direction in the maze-like central concourse, Soul normally would have grabbed her by the hand and pulled her in the right direction. But instead he hesitated, not wanting to touch her without her permission, and nearly let her walk down the wrong hallway before yelling at her to look at the sign.

Normally they would people watch at the gate, guessing the reasons that everyone was traveling. Now they talked about the snacks they had bought, with nothing to fill the long, empty pauses between assertions about the relative merits of yogurt pretzels vs chocolate pretzels. .

Normally she would confidently lead him through the crowds, making sure he didn't get overwhelmed. Now she was hesitant in her movement, causing confusion about her intended course of action, and causing them to wander into large groups of tourists, businessmen, and harried parents.

They talked the way one would with a coworker, an acquaintance. And that hurt most of all.

As the plane started boarding and they made their way down the connection tunnel, a loud woman nearly barreled into Maka. Soul instinctively placed himself between them, shielding Maka with his taller body. The force of the woman as she pushed her way past them pressed him closer to her than he had been since they woke up that morning. She stiffened, quickly ducking under his arm and hurried along.

"Sorry!" He said desperately, quickening his steps to keep up with her. "I didn't… sorry."

She didn't turn around. "It's fine. Thank you."

Soul thought about saying something else, but thought better of it. They boarded the plane in silence.

Maka stared at the patchwork ground below and sighed, absentmindedly swirling around the remains of her cranberry juice and slowly melting ice in the small plastic cup. The variation of color was interesting. She wondered what the different crops were, and which one corresponded to which color. Presumably the common yellowish colored one was wheat and one of the greenish shades was corn, but she had no idea what the others were. Maybe they were the same crop but there were variations in–.

A soft snore broke though her wondering about the make up of rural farms.

She turned towards the young man beside her. He was out like a light before they had even reached cruising altitude, courtesy of the anti nausea meds and his natural ability to fall asleep in nearly any environment.

She was envious. Sleeping would be a good distraction, a way to fast travel to a time when they were closer to her own bed.

Maybe if she fell asleep, she would wake up and everything today was just an elaborate dream.

She watched Soul's sleeping face for a moment, his features relaxed, mouth hanging open slightly in that adorable way of his. She loved him. She loved him so much.

A memory of him, naked, lust in his eyes, leaning down to her. The feeling of his mouth on her, her hand on his …

She clenched the plastic cup in her hand, squeezing it and sloshing out the mostly melted ice cube onto the tray table. She put it down and quickly wiped it up with the small napkin. When she was done, she glanced back at Soul before quickly looking away, back out the window.

It wasn't like she was against the idea of sex in principal. She knew that sex wasn't bad and didn't diminish a woman. She had read feminist philosophy fairly extensively. She knew all the concepts and could almost certainly pass an exam on the subject. But it was still hard to remember in the moment.

She knew intellectually that slut shaming was bad, but she still couldn't quiet the voice in her head that said she was dirty now. That she wasn't a "good girl" any more, the kind of woman that people respected for their mind and abilities, that would accomplish great things. She was a "slut" now, the kind of woman who giggled stupidly and men just kept around as atm candy. The kind of woman her dad would spend his time with.

She hated that she thought this. She hated that she was being such an asshole. She knew plenty of strong, smart, accomplished women who she respected who had casual sex. Blair was … well, Blair, but despite that Maka thought of her as almost like a big sister. Even Liz seemed like she had a new boy on her arm every week and it didn't reduce Maka's respect for her.

Or, at least she didn't think it did.

Guilt filled her as she admitted the judgy thoughts she had about her close friend.

And now she focused all the judgment internally, with the harshness increased exponentially.

You really have no self worth.

Gross slut.

Guess you'll have to start dressing like a slut too, because anyone can tell you're not a virgin anymore.

What kind of idiot risks pregnancy just because a guy is attractive?

Wow, you'll really sleep with anyone, won't you?

That last one wasn't fair and she knew it. She didn't sleep with just anyone.

No, it was so much worse than that.

She slept with Soul . Soul, her best friend, her partner, the one who has been with her through everything. The boy – the man she had been in love with for years. The one who she had guiltily fantasized about, touching herself alone in bed and crying from shame afterwards because she felt like she was doing something terribly wrong thinking about him like that. Because he didn't like her. At least not like that, not romantically or sexually. He loved her as a best friend, a meister. He probably thought of her as a sister and was so disgusted right now.

He just slept with her because she came on too strong and he was drunk and a guy so of course he would be into it. She shouldn't have taken advantage of his weakness.

She ruined their partnership because she was … horny. The pang of shame hit her in the chest even harder.

She realized she had torn the napkin in her hand to tiny little pieces, spread across the tray table. Shaking her head and squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to clear her mind, focusing on her steady breath. She had always been terrible at meditating, but it did help a little.

She just needed to get through this plane ride and back home. Once she was home, in Death City, in her own room, she would be able to figure things out.

After a moment she opened her eyes, feeling calmer. Sweeping up the napkin bits, she dumped them in her cup of cranberry-ish melted ice, ready to throw the whole thing away when the flight attendant came back around.

She pulled out her book again, determined to focus on something other than her mistakes.

~~~~~~~

Soul leaned with one elbow on the bar, smiling lazily at Maka as she watched the crowd of dancers, moving her shoulders vaguely along with the music. The music blared, a steady beat that made her feel pumped. She felt warm and her stomach hurt from laughing, and she felt like everything was good.

Soul leaned towards, his mouth so close to her ear she could almost feel the warmth of his breath. “Wanna dance?” he asked, his voice loud in order to make it through the thumping music, despite the closeness.

She giggled. “ You asking me to dance? Shocking.”

He shrugged, grinning. “Maybe I wanna mix it up a bit. Keep you on your toes. Show you I’m not predictable.”

“I’ll step on your toes if you’re not careful.” She had gotten much better at dancing over the years, from the practice they did to strengthen their resonance, but the old teasing and threats remained.

“Eh, I’ll take that risk. ‘Sides, it’s not like it’s a waltz.” He smirked and downed the rest of his drink as he stood up. He grabbed her hand. “Come on. Let’s dance.”

She smiled and let herself be led towards the throng of people.

They found a place at the edge of the mass of dancers and faced each other. She expected him to let go of her hand, but instead he brought it up over her head to spin her.

She laughed. “I thought we weren’t going to do any ballroom dance?” She knew he could barely hear her over the music, but he seemed to understand her words.

He rolled his eyes with a grin. “Shut up and spin.”

She spun, laughing as he initiated another spin immediately after she was facing him again. After several more in quick succession, each one faster than the last, she fell against him, out of breath and dizzy.

He caught her in his arms and pulled her into a hug, laughing freely. “Nowhere near your record,” he teased.

“Shut up, I’m drunk. Everything was spinning already.” Her complaints had no bite as she grinned happily up at him.

“Weak excuse.”

He was looking down at her with a wide smile and the look in his eyes filled her so full of warmth and love that she felt like she forgot how to breathe. His hands on her back suddenly felt different. They were heavy, firm, warm, intentional, solidly there . But they were also gentle, hesitant, soft, tender. This contrast captured her entire attention, and filled her drunken brain with the knowledge that this was something different. They were on a precipice, about to topple over into the unknown.

A force suddenly hit Maka from behind, jostling her painfully and making her push Soul into a nearby group of dancers.

“Sorry!” A voice yelled over the thrumming music as they hurried past, immediately followed by Maka and Soul apologizing profusely to the other dancers.

After almost getting pushed over by another person trying to get by, Maka quickly realized the problem. They were too near the bar, near a path that people traversed to go between the bar, the bathroom, and the dance floor. “Come on,” she said, pulling Soul further away from the bar, further into the throng of bodies.

His hand felt pleasantly heavy in hers.

#Soul x Maka #soul eater #Soul eater fanfiction #my fanfic #I forgot to post this earlier

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a-shared-experience · 2 months

Text

Yo! I slap the Gemini on the arm and point up ahead.

There’s a man face down on the pavement and a bunch of oilers fans walking by. Nobody stops, some just look in disgust.

“ throw a pulse ox on him”

I turn back to the man, “ hey friend, my name is Britt. We’re just gonna help ya lay on your back ok”

Another man runs up with a loaded needle and injects him. “ he’s my brother. He’s overdosed like three times today. I don’t know what to do”

“ I’m sorry you’re going through this. We will stay and support you guys and make sure he’s ok. My friend is a registered nurse and I’m a team lead for od response ok. You’re in good hands”. I load the second shot.

A few other houseless men stop to see if we need help. When the man comes to they help us sit him up and give him a can of soda. I offer them all narcan kits and snacks and thank them for stopping. Say what you will about people who use drugs or the houseless community , and maybe I’m a bit old fashioned- a small town girl , but a real man stops to help a person in crisis. Groups of oilers fans in their $200 jerseys and their manicured beards just keep passing by. My nurse is like 5,5 and I’m sick and wearing a medical mask and I just want to express my frustrations. What does it even mean to be a man anymore? I thought yall were big and tough. I sit down beside the man who just nearly died and ask him how’s he’s feeling. I can tell he’s holding back tears. “ I haven’t been able to sleep, I’m starving, I’m just really going through it”

“ well I have some food my friend , I didn’t give ya much naloxone so it should be ok to eat. If you don’t mind I’ll stick around , the narcan wears off pretty quickly. Any idea when ya used last or how much?”

“ I don’t remember, I don’t even know what happened”

“ my partner and I found you face down on the pavement and your brother administered the first shot of narcan.”

“That’s embarrassing “

“ I know it feels that way, it’s scary and confusing. I know that because I’ve overdosed myself. There’s no judgement here friend, no shame. It just happens. Do you grip in the inner city ?”

“ yea”

“ between me and you , i tested some dope on the north side and the dark red stuff came back as just fent and caffeine. We tested some stuff we found around here and its high percentages of tranq and tested positive for benzos and fent. It’s a lethal combo dude. No need to be ashamed or embarrassed. If Tranq is meant to take down livestock- pretty sure it’s gonna take you down too”

“ it’s like ketamine right”

“ let’s put it this way… we give k to babies and we don’t give tranq to anyone. It requires a reversal agent in high doses and there isn’t one approved for human consumption. Mixed with fent and benzos it is causing strange skin legions and abscesses and has a wicked withdrawal. We are seeing higher doses here than ever before. At the very least you should test your drugs down at spectrum. You need a sample size comparable to a matchstick head- the red bit.

You still hungry? “

“ yeah”

I hand him more food and let him know about the substance poisoning survey . I have one Tim Hortons gift card for $20 left. Might be a good idea to get something a little healthier than snacks into your system, gets you inside to warm up”

I mindfully go through the questions with him and his answers reflect the majority. “Make sure someone is really overdosing, don’t assume the person experiencing the poisoning is an addict, hold space for the person and provide emotional support. After it all goes down , it’s nice to have support , your team does it right , too bad you can’t teach enforcement”

“ well that’s exactly what we’re trying to do my friend”

I wait while he eats and eventually say, “

I’m glad you’re here. “

“ thank you”

Our day is cut short on the southside after I run into a longtime client. He asks for snacks and talks about being on methadone. He decides he wants to trade snacks for something different so the nurse obliges. He hands me a small gift and thanks me for being cool. Then tells me he has shigella.

Fuck sakes. I act cool and and keep chatting and when we say our goodbyes I tell the nurse in a low tone , “ don’t touch anything. We are going inside to wash our hands surgeon style. Don’t touch your face, don’t touch your vape. If anyone stops us, we are out of supplies”

Shigella is highly contagious and quite vicious on the gastrointestinal system, basically you have explosive bloody diarrhea which can be life threatening in unhealthy people. One of my managers is a young handsome Aries - he was hospitalized and lost 25 pounds. It’s fucking awful. Everything needs to be sanitized with a cavi wipe now. One more day , one more day. I’d call in but I’m training a med student from u of a tomorrow and literally on call for all staffing changes 😩

I’m tireddddded

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terraliensvent · 3 months

Note

I’m sorry put the op was right about them being human beings with thoughts and feelings. Did it come off to strong? Yes. But the fact you have to put the glaring issue of they can’t take criticism as your stance isn’t even a viable way of proving your point as there have been clear efforts to change things in the community as of recently. Now that Temul is in charge of the group!

Not saying the fair of amount of criticism isn’t justified. In fact there is always room for improvement and it should be heavily encouraged.

But shouldn’t mods be people you trust? Not total strangers? but active community members who become good acquaintances with staff? No seriously. I’ve been spectating the server since July of last year and half of those people didn’t even know each-other til they met on the server. Some of them aren’t even friends til being asked to join. And so what if they’re friends? That means they’re a trustworthy candidate that can be vouched for.

It’s actually insane how people will just assume the worst out of a situation without any definitive answers but purely based on their pre-decided judgement of others. Which is a huge issue right now especially with cancel culture.

I can’t even begin to explain how entitled half the people in closed species communities are because half of the problems stem from the people themselves. Now this is a vent blog and it’s meant for voices to be heard. That much is obvious. All you need to know is change doesn’t happen within a week. It takes months so don’t assume the worst in situations or you’re gonna stay bitter in these communities when you eventually quit.

Stay safe and touch grass 👍

post related

i feel like youre neglecting to acknowledge the full range of points i made in my last response.

yes, theres change happening within the past 2 months, but theres also things to have gripes about. im glad things are seeming to move toward getting better, but at the same time that shouldnt deflect from the fact there are still things to be worked on

i understand theres the big rework happening right now with stuff, but for transparency’s sake im not going to give points for things that arent completed. you can say youre working on things, but until i can physically see them and be able to make a judgement on the effectiveness of implemented changes, im not going to comment on them because i dont want to have to retroactively edit my perspective.

also, “mods are making changes” and “mods cant take criticism” arent mutually exclusive. the changes being made currently are a result of the work getting too hard for them with design approvals because they were SO nitpicky and people actually started to complain on a large scale. but as seen in the suggestion forums, not a lot of suggestions seem to be really introspected on. ive seen so many solid ideas that work for other large species just be totally tossed out because “its too much work for mods” but yet when more mods are hired, they dont seem to be doing really any work.

which brings me to my next point, i said in the last post i would have been more forgiving about all the mods being in the same clique if it werent for the fact that the new mods never seem to be doing anything besides promoting commissions. quality of life improvements are constantly denied because the workload is “just so difficult” but then you never actually see evidence of extra hands being used to make big change. again, if you keep adding people do the mod team it should not be taking weeks to get a MYO design approved.

im gonna barely entertain the last bit of your ask simply because it comes off as intensely patronizing to me. are we really talking about cancel culture when the issue at hand is “terra staff are bad at taking criticism?” it comes off as very much “holier than thou” mentality when you call others entitled for daring to say they dont like the way things are run. change takes months, yeah, but thats when you actually DECIDE to change and not shrug it off because “work hard :(“ dont put yourself on a pedestal just because youre more dismissive of things than others

#closed species vent #terralien #closed species #terraliens #vent

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writingsofyourgirl · 8 months

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It’s been awhile! I feel like I just come on here to rant and vent but I guess I can come on here to share whatever I want haha. Lol and would you look at that, it’s about the same person from my last rant.

This time it’s about my birthday. I asked ____ if they could come at 3 PM to help me put up decorations and their response annoyed me and it felt like I was inconveniencing them by asking. I needed to let off some steam so I vented to you and you said “I just think you are like extra sensitive after feeling the way you have all week which is totally understandable!” If I rewind to the previous week, I was emotional and feeling a bit down thinking about how I don’t have very many close friends which I’ve gotten over. However, everytime you talk about me being sensitive, you say it like it’s a bad thing and it feels like a form of gaslighting. It’s like you are saying that my feelings are the issue. I know I’m sensitive, but does it need to be said like it’s a bad thing? Because it’s not. Everyone is sensitive including you. And why are you telling me what you think I’m feeling? But I can’t tell you how to respond.

I asked you if I’m being a bitch for feeling this way and you said “I feel as though I will get in trouble if I tell you my honest opinion”. Really not sure what you meant by this because I responded with “what? Oh is she picking up something and so she can’t come at 3?” You didn’t confirm nor deny it so I’m assuming that’s what you were referring to but who knows.

Then you told me to communicate with her why I need her to come at 3 to help with decorations which I had already explained but I told you that this doesn’t need an explanation. If I need help with decorations and I ask to come at a specific time, why does it need an explanation? The explanation is that I need help with decorations at 3 or else I would not have said 3. It’s either you can come or can’t come. If you can’t come, it’s ok. But my friend was asking me to make a decision for her about whether she should go home first or just come straight to the Airbnb, how can I make that decision for her? It’s not like she asked for clarification on why I asked her to be there at 3. It’s her decision in what she wants to do, I can’t make that for her. It’s like if she really wanted to come help me with the decorations she could have decided on her own to drive straight to the Airbnb. I understand that she probably prefers to get ready at home, but for this one time she can’t plan ahead? Then, you said that you don’t agree with my statement and “if youre going to ask someone to do something for you and they have questions, thats their right and they’re not obligated to help you”. Bitch. I fucking know they’re not obligated to help me. Lol like why do you talk to me as if you’re teaching me something, like you’re talking down on me in a sense? I mean who knows maybe I’m in the wrong, but I can tell you this, I did not like the way you talked to me and I can say the same for some of our previous conversations. I notice a pattern. And you tend to talk about me being sensitive and you bring up in our conversations that this or that person is not obligated to do this or that. And of course, you can ask questions for clarification but my friend did not do that.

Then you said therapy told you not to assume what someone means unless you asked or it’s actually stated because the way we react is dependent on that reaction. You also said that my friend’s response showed that she was more than happy to help. Actually, that’s the way you interpreted it and I interpreted as an inconvenience which led to my assumption. It's a common human tendency to interpret messages and make assumptions so for you to say not to assume, that’s quite hard and unnatural. We are different people and different people can interpret things differently so how do you know you’re right and I’m not or that I’m right and you’re not? It’s not about who’s right or wrong, it’s about empathizing with my feelings. You say my feelings are never invalid. I tell you that ____ could have worded her response better and you say that my feelings aren’t wrong and that I could have worded my response better. You did not validate my thoughts and instead came with a rebuttal to what I said. Your response feels to me like you are saying that I am in the wrong. And then you say that it doesn’t mean you’re right yet you speak as if your opinion is right.

It’s just really upsetting when I’m trying to vent and that’s all I’m trying to do and then it turns into something bigger like how you felt the need to state your opinion or give me unsolicited advice. Also, when I asked for your thoughts, that’s all I was asking, I was not asking you to show me between right or wrong. This conversation went on way longer than it should have. I just needed someone to talk to, I wasn't looking for a solution. I just want you to value me, what I say and what I think and I felt the opposite. I was looking for validation and instead I felt invalidated. I did not feel heard.

Another thing you tend to do, it seems like you have this idea about how I am or how I think and because you have these notions about me, it shapes the way you respond to me and honestly, that shit bothers me because even if you think you know me, which you do to some extent, we’ve been friends for so long, I just wish that you would try to get to know me more rather than thinking that you know exactly the way that I am because everyone has many parts to them and there are still very many parts of me that you do not know about. I wish that you were more open to learning that about me. People change, we are never the same person we were even a few months ago. Our mindsets can change rapidly and we grow. I think because this has occurred on multiple occasions, I will stop venting to you now. I just needed to get this all out, feeling much better now.

On another note, I will say, I understand that we are all flawed in some way. I think that is just the way you are, you value and pride yourself a lot in that you are able to help people with their problems and I know it boosts your ego. Because of this I will also try my best to remind myself of this and refrain from holding anything against you. I will try not to take offense and try to be the best friend that I can be.

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