#god the vibes in that room must have been fucking electric

[canonicallyanxious]

listened to majesty snowbird by sufjan stevens once [1 time] and was immediately filled with the urge to write. thank u for my life mr. stevens this song is so good and so powerful

#sarah.txt #what a good fucking song. #sometimes i'm like man it would be nice to have a studio recording of this song #but also it's almost part of what makes it so special that you can only access it as a somewhat obscure concert recording on youtube #like listening to the recording and there's almost no crowd sound through it all bc everyone is holding their breath thru the magic #god the vibes in that room must have been fucking electric #it truly wouldn't hit the same without the lone woo at the end of the intro! #or the little nuances and scratches of the live guitar solo during the outro! #what i wouldn't give to go back in time and see this song performed live in person. that's what i would use time travel for i have decided

[cinnamontoastcrunch-15]

You know how with hippies they sometimes meet new people and instantly vibe with them because they're on the same spiritual level? Yeah this happened to Remus once with another person and Sirius was not having it. S was convinced that R would get it in their head that it was a sign that they're dating the wrong person and leave him so he just sort of tries to be a hippie for the day. Remus thinks it was adorable.

THIS THIS THIS

So this oneshot takes place much earlier in their relationship just to make it a bit more feasible because I fully believe that after a few years Sirius was part hippie by nature, so here’s hippie Remus and scientist Sirius a couple of months in :)

Sirius glanced around the small bookshop and bit back a smile. Of course Remus worked there. Everything about them was becoming less and less surprising. Remus had said he’d probably be on till, so Sirius strolled past the shelves adorned with vines and string lights, some with old books, some new, some full of crystals and cards called… tarot? The moment he saw the till, his face brightened. God, what was happening to him? He hadn’t been this sickeningly into anyone since he was 14!

Remus was stood with his elbows resting on the counter, talking to someone who was presumably a customer and laughing. A lot.

Why were they laughing so much?

Sirius stepped a little closer, catching the end of their conversation.

“Sorry, I just have to ask; are you an earth sign, by any chance? I usually get along really well with earth signs.” Remus asked the guy, and Sirius frowned, confused.

What the hell was an earth sign?

“Yeah! Are you a water sign?”

“Yeah, I am.” Remus said with a smile, and Sirius’ heart dropped just a little.

“I’m Edgar, by the way.” The guy introduced himself, as Sirius reached a conclusion that he really didn’t want to reach.

Sirius was… boring.

“I’m Remus.”

He stared at a fucking microscope all day. His house was full of notebooks and equations.

“Well, Remus, we’re meant to be friends.”

Remus was free, interesting. Amazing.

Shit.

“I was thinking the same thing.”

He wasn’t good enough for Remus, with his extensive jewellery, dark purple flowing skirt and white shirt, a gentle brown eyeliner accentuating their amber eyes. Remus lit up a room, Sirius just walked in and analysed stuff. Christ, Remus was probably going to leave him. It had only been a few months, he was probably going to get bored of him in five minutes. He was too sheltered for someone like Remus.

Throughout this very minor and not at all terrifying panic, Remus had looked over and spotted him.

“Sirius! Hi!” Sirius snapped back into reality, trying to slow his own heart. His eyes met Remus’, and everything melted into a smile.

How the hell they could do that, Sirius would never know.

Maybe he really was magic.

“Hi, Rem. You nearly ready to go?”

“Yeah, yeah, almost. As soon as Marlene arrives we can get out of here.” He said, reaching out and squeezing Sirius’ hand, sending a jolt of electricity through him and making his breath hitch. He really couldn’t think like a normal person when he was around Remus. “Oh! This is Edgar!” Remus turned and indicated to him enthusiastically, Sirius’ brain switching back on. He turned and smiled politely at Edgar, ignoring the fact that he wanted to scream. Edgar was covered in crystals. More so than Remus, to the point that it felt like he was 50% stone. Not only that, but they were the ones that Remus had said were his favourites.

It was like the universe was dropping people in between Remus and Sirius in an active attempt to split them up. Sirius almost wanted to start pre-grieving the relationship to prepare for the inevitable breakup. How the hell was he meant to hold on to someone as amazing as Remus when he was just… him?

That was when it hit him.

Surely it couldn’t be that hard to be a hippie. He loved it in Remus, he must have been able to do it himself. There went the next week, while he figured out what he was meant to do.

He was going to be interesting enough for Remus if it fucking killed him.

-

Sirius had been acting off all week.

Remus was good at reading Sirius, and he was pretty sure that Sirius ending any messages complaining about employees with ‘what an air sign’ or ‘the vibes are off with that one’ was pretty out of character. Still, it wasn’t anything too noticeable, not until Remus went over Sirius’ that Saturday.

The moment he opened the door, something felt different.

Firstly, the lights were dimmed, and there was… incense burning? What the hell was going on with Sirius?

“Uh… Sirius?”

“I’m in the kitchen!” He called, as Remus ambled over. The moment he got into the kitchen he stopped, stunned into freezing.

Sirius was wearing a skirt.

A long, flowing, sandy orange skirt.

While Remus’ first thought very well may have been that it was insanely fucking sexy, his second thought was what on earth he was doing. He really wasn’t one for wearing skirts, no matter what a crime it was that he didn’t, and he was baking. As in, not sitting and getting excited about his work like he usually was. It was nice to see Sirius trying new things, but there was something off about it. Like he was trying to fit in to something that he didn’t quite fit into. Not yet, anyway. It seemed like it was making him slightly uncomfortable. He turned around and his face lit up.

Okay, something Remus was used to.

“Rem! Hi!”

“Hey, Sirius. You alright?”

“Yeah, I’m great.”

“Are you sure?” He asked, wanting to get some sort of an answer. The switch had happened so suddenly it was like he had gotten whiplash, and he was desperate for answers.

“…yeah? Why, what’s going on?”

“It’s nothing, don’t worry about it. How was work yesterday?” Remus asked, walking over and kissing him quickly.

“Oh, I- I didn’t go.” Sirius admitted, cringing a little, and Remus almost cringed right alongside him, with the internal struggle Sirius seemed to have had with himself. “Gave myself a day off, you know? To be more… free.”

“Right, Sirius, what’s going on?” Remus asked. As much as he was enjoying Sirius baking in a skirt, him missing work was so odd that he had to get to the bottom of it. According to Sirius, the only other time he had was when he was so ill that James had forced him to go home.

“What d’you mean?”

“I mean you never miss work. You’ve found something you love, that you’re passionate about. That’s important. You’ve been acting different all week, what’s going on?”

“Different as in… bad?” Sirius asked, looking slightly stricken, and Remus’ heart immediately gave a slight tug.

“No, not bad!” He said hastily, quickly composing himself. “Just… different. It feels like you’re not being all that authentic to yourself.” He answered calmly. “You can talk to me. What’s wrong?”

“I just-“ Sirius’ breath caught in his throat as he let his eyes slide shut and took a deep, stabilising breath. “I’m so boring, Rem.” Remus frowned, confused.

“Sorry?”

Since when was Sirius boring?

“I- I saw you talking to that guy, Edgar, at the shop. He was just- he was interesting, and you two got along so well, and it just made me think.”

“Think about what?”

“Remus, you deserve someone like that! Someone who knows which signs are fire signs and won’t talk your bloody ear off about cells!” He exclaimed, going to pace and finally morphing a lot more into the Sirius that Remus was used to. “It felt like a wake up call that, at some point, I would get too boring and you’d leave. Rightfully so. So I took it upon myself to make sure I was someone who deserves to be with you.” Remus watched him for a moment, processing.

Honestly? That was so bloody endearing.

Sirius looked like he was about to start up again any moment, arms flailing just slightly as he paced, pushing Remus to step forwards and grab his wrists gently to stop him. Christ, how Sirius could think he’d ever want anyone else, he’d never know. Couldn’t he see just how completely and utterly perfect he was? Sirius paused, turning and facing Remus, slightly wide eyed.

“Sirius, I don’t think you understand how much I like all of that about you. I really love how passionate you are about your work, how much you care, and how much you care about learning about the things I’m interested in. Just because Edgar knew what they were doesn’t mean I’m going to run away with him, or something. Surprisingly enough, Sirius, I actually love listening to you talk about work. You should see the way your eyes light up. I’m not going anywhere, and you sure as hell don’t have to prove yourself to me.” As he spoke, he slid his hands down from Sirius’ wrists until he had both of his hands in his. He knew he was going to have to tell him. For someone who was typically pretty sure of himself, he was nervous as fuck to tell him. “Christ, Sirius, I don’t just like you, I’m in love with you.”

He had thought Sirius’ eyes were already wide, but it was nothing compared to once he had gotten the words out. Fuck, had he freaked Sirius out? He hadn’t meant to, he had just wanted Sirius to stop panicking about changing. He just wanted Sirius to know he thought that he was perfect-

“I love you too.” Sirius admitted softly, a smile starting to form on his face. Remus smiled straight back, breathing out a relieved laugh.

“Well then we’re set.”

“But what if-“

“No ifs, just kiss me.” Remus answered quickly, moving his hands to pull Sirius in and kiss him. He pulled away shortly after. “I do love the skirt, though. It suits you.”

“Y’know what? I do too. It’s making me question quite a bit about myself, though.”

“Question away, love, I’ll be here for it.”

#THEM>>> #I can’t explain my love for them #also Remus does indeed panic #he’s just good at remaining composed #they just love each other so much #it warms my heart sm #wolfstar #sirius black #marauders #wolfstar oneshot #remus lupin #remus x sirius #young marauders #moony x padfoot #atyd marauders #marauders oneshot

[nokillbananashelter]

ZELDA IS YOUR CAR, A NEW THEORY

THE QUESTION NINTENDO IS ASKING ISN'T JUST

"WHAT IF ZELDA HAD A CAR"

IT'S ALSO ASKING

"WHAT IF ZELDA  *WAS*  A CAR"

Hear me out- this is alot of theories in one. First- it is a "you will control someone else besides link" rumor, as it involves zelda magically possessing spirit fueled choo choo goo, or controlling it with her sick sheikah slate from a distance/other realms and THROUGH LINKS ARM.

Second, it is a "zelda is dead" theory, as in order for it to make sense, she must be transported to a new plane of existence where she and link are NOT AT ALL CLOSE BY, but need to work together, As in, she's probably your "Companion" character, but like, using her sheikah phone to drone pilot links FUCKING ARM, I NEED TO STRESS THIS PART, SHES CONTROLLING YOU THROUGH THAT.

Thirdly, it is boldly answering the first question of "What if Zelda had a car" by creating a reasonably extraneous explanation for the invention of the wheel, and how the necessity for that invention would have to play out, because its something so bold and daring they needed to hype themselves up with lore in order to properly digest the Nuts and Bolts Zelda.

Fourthly, and this one is for all you boys who work so hard, it is a Zonai theory, as it must clearly explain the "Magical Ancient Tech 2: Electric Bokoballoon" vibe Totk CLEARLY HAS.

Fifthly, it is a Twilight Realm theory, because clearly the Zonai and the twilight are related, like come on now, be serious, and we've seen a sacred/twilight realm in the trailer. Be honest with me. Do you really think it isn't that?  Are you really gonna think those aren't related? Arent you just playing with your own heart at this point? Give yourself a rest. Let it be true within yourself.

Sixthly, it is most absolutely a timeline theory. which is exhausting, and I hate to say it, but its probably got some kingdom hearts level "im your evil twin but not the real evil twin but the sad evil twin within the dark you" bullshit happening. Maybe Midna and Hilda and Hylia and Zelda all walk into a room together and shrug before talking on the phone with link. The Logo is literally a car tire made out of two stone dragons. This game is about gods, wheels, times, cycles, motorcycles, circular logics, technological advancement from people breaking stuff for fun, and absolute nonsenses about what that philosophically means from a story standpoint as well as a game mechanics standpoint. That's a promise, but I’m not detailing that here.

And with those points being made- this is the Theory.

Zelda and Link, newly equipped with the Sheikah Phone that has been suspected as communicating with the dead in old crypts deep under hyrule, are exploring Ganon's crypt chamber.They find out who sealed him in the first place- the Zonai! But Gasp! Merely steppin in this chamber was folly! It begins crumbling, and the two are separated in an explosion. the hand that was sealing ganon now must make a choice-try saving a failing seal and also loose two very important prophesied people, or, to make the hard choice of  saving zelda or link while eons of magic become undone, dooming hyrule to an even crueler fate....for now.

Link is saved by the Zonai hand under request from Zelda. Zelda clearly makes a self sacrificial but calculated move, because she knows something the audience doesn't, or she recognizes... a second, shadow zonai hand, that was more reluctant and cautious, but still calling.  Yes, thats right- the zonai are in multiple realms, above and below. Perhaps they are in opposition to eachother? Or maybe...longing for eachother? As zelda falls deep into the depths, She finds herself in good company! PERCHANCE EVEN MIDNA'S COMPANY??? Though She is technically safe, by all accounts she is in a spirit realm, and therefore, dead.

Link, on the other hand (HAHA) , is pulled with the Zonai up in the sky towards a different realm we recognize- The Secret Dragon Realm!!! But at the last second!!! Ganon, or one of his goons?! Comes in and snatches link from the zonai hand as its juuuuust squeaking through the window to the other realm. The zonai arm, which is revealed to be a remote control device between realms, and links arm, are FUSED. Link doesn't make it to the spirit realm where all was going to be explained!!! 

As link falls, we get a peek at new bow falling mechanics and time slow down, but its not enough!!! We're too thrown by our powerful new arm!!! We're still falling!! AHHH!!!!!! IT'S OVER!!!!

"STOP!" Zelda cries, holding the sheikah device from the shadow realm!!

Suddenly the ground is getting farther and farther away again, and we're going BACK UP INTO THE SKY, because zelda has changed the trajectory of a piece of rubble via the sheika phone through our arm and its LIFTING US!! we're introduced to the new time reverse mechanic in our tutorial area, The abandoned and nearly unrecognizable but clearly footprintable Skyloft (I HATE THIS DETAIL TOO, BUT I FEEL IT COMIN, OKAY?).  Right off the bat, nintendo makes the goal get to the ground, but be cautious" and we learn all over again how to control the shiekah powers and some spooky new ones- including Ectoplasmic Choo Choo Goo, because all of the Zonai tech in our control is powered by Zeldas ghost/spirit power!! As we descend, we begin to realize something..... a lot of the islands in the sky are not even accessible from the height we were at. How could this be???!!! Surely there is much more to do in the sky before going down?? It seems we'll need to get to the ground and uncover, develop, and think our way out of this one with what we have below!! Wait, Is that.... ZONAI MONSTER TRUCK WHEELS?!  Zelda will need to do research based on our findings, and she'll need us to collect as much magic green choo choo goo as possible, to give her more room to possess and control objects and link's arm.

 So lets ground this concept. While Link is the character you control, You do, in a strange extra layer of role playing, Control Links Arm and the Choo Choo Goo as "DEAD" ZELDA, FROM HER SHEIKAH SPIRIT-PHONE, IN THE SPIRIT REALM. As she tries to make her way back abstractly from the dead realm to help you defeat ganon, she also has a literal direct hand in the adventure, and 

ZELDA 

*IS*

THE

CAR

#totk #zelda tears of the kingdom #banjo kazooie #gaming #game theory #Zelda lore #you know it’s true cowards #i’m terrified #Zelda died and became a car

[hazbincalifornia]

Hazbin Episode 2 Liveblog

Episode two, here we go!

I will admit, one of the only 'leaks' I've ever looked at was the copyright office one that gave the titles of season one since it felt like less of a 'leak' than the others, and I was so excited about early access because it pretty much said 'this episode will have at least one part be about Alastor and Vox'. VERY curious to see where this goes.

Oof, from the texts we can already see some of Val.

Hey, silver lining!

"Oh, there you are" he is ADORABLE and I LOVE HIM

Shadow-transport, fun! Also, Bella would still love him.

'Pent wants to take down Alastor to impress the Vees' makes perfect sense now that I think about it, as he did keep trying to get 'in' with them on the old instagram accounts. Still, F to the idea they used to be exes because I still think it makes their dynamic funny.

I SEE THOSE HYPNO SWIRLS...

I am so charmed by Vox already. I love Vel's voice too.

One of the boards says 'trust us*' above '*with what? that's none of your business' and my theory that Vox uses his tech empire to gain energy/power and a cult-like following seems to be accurate, especially considering that electricity bit when it first cut to him. (It also makes me wonder- is part of the reason Alastor hates TV so much just because it might make him subconsciously susceptible to Vox's influence?

Oooo, he can travel through electricity like Alastor travels through shadows.

The fact that the dress seemingly inspired by her original one is the one she likes is a cute little callback.

Robofizz!!! Man, wouldn't it be funny if THAT was the 'character that's in both series' that Viv mentioned on a stream once? (I still figure it's likely to be one of the other sins since that's what makes sense.)

Also, not really what I expected for Val's voice? I suppose I didn't really have a concrete hc before, though, so I'll adjust.

So Angel used to literally live at the studio? They must have rooms there for the staff to keep a tighter leash on them.

That filter on Vox's voice the second he hears about Alastor... I think the fact that it seemingly only appears when he's knocked off-kilter makes an interesting contrast to the fact that Alastor's is always on.

The idea of making Alastor's little minions living inkblots is a fun one! Sort of an old-timey animation vibe?

Yessss Vox song

OH MY GOD THEY USED THE SHEET THEY TEASED ALASTOR'S REDESIGN WITH

Wouldn't it be funny of Vox goes through a whole big musical number and Alastor just... doesn't even see it.

Oh, he saw it... and just chose to completely ignore it. Which fits what I've been musing on, how he refuses to let Vox know directly that he gets under his skin without trying to brush it off as not worth any real time or effort.

OH. OH THEY WERE A THING. Favorite song so far too!

Fuck yesssssss monster Al monster Al monster Al

They're gonna use Pent, aren't they. And he's going to be torn between their approval and Charlie actually treating him decently, I bet.

Also, sharks. I hope Vark was kept since the giant dorky cartoon shark was cute, but I love the robotic ones.

Puppydog eye Charlie is adorable. I love her.

Oh hey, Alastor has an official staff title now! I previously figured 'co-manager' (which would make him share with Vaggie, lmao) but Facility Manager makes more sense.

I love how into it Pent's getting.

Yeeeep, nailed 'Pent is happy to be genuinely praised'. Makes sense Angel might be kind of salty, though.

And the first showing of Fat Nuggets!

Bedhead Charlie and nightgown Vaggie are adorable.

I wonder if Pentious is immune to Vox's mind-control since he can do hypnosis himself?

I guess it does make sense the con got ruined pretty much right away, they do have a lot of ground to cover. It does feel a little odd to have him calling himself unforgivable when he's only been here for, like, a day, though. You fucked up too fast for them to get any real useful info.

I really like the harmonies in the song! It sounds really aesthetically pleasing.

Pfffft, Niffty. Her dreams of snakey bad boys shattered. I still think he should fill her with eggs though. Just once.

'Ol pal, huh?' You know, I WAS always curious why Vox was on the list of overlords that had been in hell 'for centuries' that Alastor toppled- I joked once that HE was the original radio demon before Alastor knocked him out and he pivoted to TV, but it sort of sounds like he latches on to whatever new technology there is to keep on top so it's entirely possible that they were both radio-themed at one point before some sort of fallout.

#shadow says stuff #hh spoilers

[morganaspendragonss]

´till death do us part

@911lonestarangstweek day 4 - m is for...mcd, mourning

if you saw my posts about the 'crying fic'... this is it

thanks to liz and @halsteadmarchs for the beta!

ao3 | 5.5k | major character death, hurt/comfort, mourning, non-linear narrative, car accidents, hopeful ending

This is a mistake.

It’s been a long time since Carlos last did this, but not long enough at the same time. His friends would disagree with him—they tell him he needs to get back in the game, and it’s well-meaning, but they don’t get it. They don’t know how hard these past few years have been for him.

They don’t know what it’s like to lose the person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with; they don’t know what it’s like to go from being engaged one day to alone the next. In fact, there’s only one person Carlos knows who even has a hope of understanding, and he really doesn’t appreciate the irony that it’s the one person he’s guaranteed to never see again.

It’s not that he meant to turn himself into a recluse after it happened; he knows that’s not what he would want for him.

Thing is, Carlos isn't sure that he gets to have an opinion anymore, since he was the one who left. Carlos doesn’t blame him for what happened—that would be stupid—but sometimes, sometimes, he just gets so damn angry at him.

(he always feels guilty for it after, which is equally as stupid as the anger. there’s no one left for him to direct it at, after all)

Carlos sighs, shaking his head as he steps into the bar. He doesn’t want to be here—he wouldn’t be here, but Michelle had threatened to make a special trip back to Austin specifically to kick his ass if he didn’t at least give this a try.

This, being the blind date his friends had insisted he go on. Technically, he could leave and still not be lying when he tells Michelle he went—he is in the bar, after all—but Carlos has never liked the idea of standing someone up, no matter the circumstances.

So here he is. Alone at a bar, nursing a lukewarm beer, and wishing he were anywhere else.

Someone slides into the seat next to him, and Carlos barely gets a second to prepare himself before he’s met with a winning smile and sparkling green eyes.

God, why did they have to be green?

“Hey,” the guy says, still smiling. “Carlos, right? Nice to meet you. I’m Domenic.”

*

Carlos is still trying to catch his breath, his head thumping back against the wall of the bathroom stall they’ve ended up in, when lips brush his ear, hot breath sending electricity down his spine.

“I’m TK, by the way.” The whisper is rough, a smirk laced into it, like TK knows exactly what he’s done to him.

And Carlos is so far from fully-functioning that the only response he can come up with is a breathy, “I know.”

TK pulls back, his brows furrowing though there’s a wry quirk to his lips. “Didn’t take you for a Star Wars fan, but okay.”

Now it’s Carlos’s turn to frown as his addled brain struggles to put together TK’s thought process there. “What?”

“Never mind.”

Well. This took a turn. Carlos has no idea what’s going on, but there is something in the back of his mind that tells him he must have sounded like a creep, telling this guy he’s pretty much only just met that he already knows his name. He gestures lamely towards TK in explanation. “Your turn-out coat at the scene the other night. I thought it probably stood for something but then one of your team—Marwani, I think?—called you. So.”

Carlos shrugs, embarrassment quickly catching up with him, which seems absurd given what they just did. Then again, it’s been a long time since he’s done anything like this; he’s more of a wine-and-dine kind of guy than the type to make out with a near stranger in a less-than-sanitary bathroom.

But there’s something about TK Strand that has Carlos wanting to know everything about him.

And if everything starts here, well. He’s more than happy to take it.

Thankfully, TK seems to pick up on the sudden awkwardness in the stall. He takes a couple of steps back until he’s leaning against the opposite wall, which doesn’t really put that much space between them, but Carlos appreciates it all the same.

“So, do I get a name, or…?”

The question has Carlos flushing all over again, turning a bright red when he sees TK’s smile. He clears his throat and smiles, trying not to wince. “Carlos.”

“Carlos,” TK repeats, dragging the syllables out like he’s testing the sound of them on his tongue. Carlos shivers a little, his breath catching in his throat at the small smile that spreads across TK’s face.

Then a phone is being thrust in his hand, unlocked and opened on the Add contact page. “Put your number in,” TK says. “In case you ever, you know. Feel like doing this again.”

A thrill runs down Carlos’s spine at the thought that TK wants to do this again. Maybe he’s not the only one who feels this connection. Maybe…

Well. It’s too soon for that. But as he types in his number, Carlos can’t help but wonder where, exactly, this road might lead.

*

His house is quiet when he gets home. It’s a familiar kind of quiet, one that’s lain over the place like a blanket ever since that day three years ago. Carlos has gotten used to it over time, and he thinks that maybe it’s eased a little—but only a little.

Things haven’t changed much over the years. TK’s stuff still decorates the house, not as much as it used to, but Carlos hadn’t been able to bring himself to remove the stuffed bear that sits on the chair by their bed, or the plastic duck TK had insisted they have in the bathroom for ‘the vibes’, or the hand-sewn heart a little girl whose parents TK had saved had gifted him, which hangs proudly in their front window.

And the pictures; Carlos refuses to take the pictures down. The one sitting on his nightstand had been turned over for a long time after the accident, but now he can’t imagine going to bed each night without seeing it. It’s from their engagement party, a candid captured by Evie, a professional photographer in the making according to Tommy.

Carlos is inclined to agree—the photo, showing him and TK looking at each other, wide smiles on both their faces, is his favourite thing in the world.

His phone rings, making him jump. Carlos sighs heavily when he sees Michelle’s name flash up on FaceTime and he briefly considers declining, but there’s no way she’d be deterred so easily.

He takes a second to get himself together, then answers, plastering a smile on his face. “Hey chica.”

Michelle doesn’t waste a second in getting to the point. “So,” she says, leaning forward and grinning, “how’d it go?”

“It went.”

Her smile falters and she frowns, scrutinising him. “Did you even go?”

“Yes.” Carlos purses his lips, not wanting to get into it anymore, but Michelle is insistent and he’s too tired to make excuses right now. “His name is Domenic, he’s nice, I’m not seeing him again.”

“Why?”

“You know why.”

“Carlos.” Michelle sighs, her voice going quiet. “It’s been three years.”

“That’s not a long time.”

“I know.”

“I still dream about him, ‘Chelle,” Carlos cuts in, sudden tears overwhelming him. “I still—I still think about what I could have done differently to save him, I still imagine the future we could have had. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop. I don’t know if I can stop.”

“When Iris disappeared—”

“It’s not the same,” he snaps, harsher than he means to. “You always had that hope, right? Everyone was telling you Iris was dead, but you always believed that she would come back. And she did, and I am so happy about that, I am, but guess what, Michelle? TK is dead. He’s dead. I’m never gonna see him again—in fact, the last time I did see him, it was when his body was lying in a morgue, and he was so cold and so still and so—so not TK that I could barely believe it was him.

“But it was, because he’s dead. It’s not the same.”

He’s properly crying by the time he finishes his speech, and Michelle has tears in her eyes too. Carlos feels a little guilty now, but he can’t bring himself to be fully sorry for what he said. Still, Michelle looks crushed, and Carlos can’t lose his best friend.

One more loss would kill him, he thinks.

“Michelle, listen—”

“It’s fine, Carlos,” she interrupts, swiping a hand under her eyes. “You… You’re right. It’s not the same. I’ll just. I’ll leave you alone now. I’m sorry the date didn’t work out.”

Then she’s gone, and Carlos is alone again, the weight of it settling uncomfortably on his shoulders.

*

Their first real date is painfully awkward, reminiscent of covert high school meet-ups with boys in the nearby diners, or like that one time Carlos tried using a dating app. That had been an experience he’d wanted to forget, but now he finds himself recalling it in horrific detail as he and TK sit on opposite sides of a table, a plate of limp fries slowly cooling between them.

“So—”

“I was thinking—”

They both speak at the same time, and an embarrassed flush rises on Carlos’s cheeks. He swallows past the lump in his throat and gestures to TK, barely able to look him in the eyes. “You should go first.”

TK laughs and shakes his head. “I was about to tell you the same thing. Since when have things been this awkward between us? We fucked on the floor of your front room about a week after meeting, surely we should be well past this stage by now.”

He has a point.

Carlos laughs too and finally works up the courage to meet TK’s gaze. “I mean, it’s not like we were doing much talking back then.”

“Things are a lot simpler without clothes,” TK agrees, a suggestive lilt to his tone and, somehow, it’s all that’s needed to break the tense silence they’d previously been suffering in. Carlos grabs a fry, grimacing at the grease that instantly coats his fingers, and points it at TK.

“Cool it, Strand,” he warns. “You aren’t going to find it that easy to seduce me anymore.”

TK grins, his eyes sparkling. “Oh, we’ll see about that, Officer.”

*

Carlos is surprised when he wakes up the next morning to a text from Domenic.

Hey, it reads. Sorry about last night. I know that you’re not into me or whatever and that’s cool, but I like you. Do you think we could maybe still be friends?

He sighs and drops his phone onto his bare chest, arm flopping onto the other side of the bed. It’s funny, he thinks idly; before TK, he’d tended to sleep closer to the middle and it had never bothered him. Now, it feels weird to break from the way things used to be—in Carlos’s head, the left side is still TK’s, and the right his.

He knows what Domenic’s text implies. ‘Let’s be friends and then we can see how it goes’. Carlos could tell him now that it’s not going anywhere and save them both the trouble, but he kind of...wants a friend.

It sounds pathetic, even to his own ears, but all his friends are either fellow cops, the 126, or Michelle, who’s in another state. And Domenic was nice. So, really, what’s the harm?

Twenty minutes later, they have plans to meet at a coffee shop.

Ten minutes after that, Carlos arrives.

*

Carlos startles as TK’s arms suddenly slip around his waist, his chin pressing into Carlos’s shoulder. He quickly relaxes into the hold, covering TK’s hands with his own, but TK isn’t fooled.

“Where did you go?” he murmurs, breath tickling Carlos’s neck.

“Nowhere,” Carlos answers. “I was just...thinking.”

“About what?”

“Well…” He hesitates, biting his lip, then spins to face TK, letting their still-joined hands swing in the minute space between them. “This is crazy, right? Not, like, bad crazy—well, a little bit bad crazy; our last place did burn down—but all of this. Getting a house together. Three bedrooms. All of it. It’s crazy.”

TK grins, the little frown that had emerged at Carlos’s first words quickly melting away. “Completely,” he agrees. He kisses Carlos briefly, then steps away, breaking their hands apart to tread a slow circuit around their new front room. Carlos watches him fondly, somehow falling even more in love with him.

“You know,” TK says suddenly, his eyes roving around the empty space, “I’ve never actually done this before.”

“What do you mean?”

He waves his hands, gesturing at the flaking paint on the walls and the lack of furniture. “Decorated a house. I had an apartment in New York but that came fully-furnished and I didn’t exactly have a ton of stuff to add. And then when I moved here with my dad, I didn’t care too much about how the house looked, and you know how my dad is about interior design. It’s a little...scary, thinking about doing it now, with you.”

Carlos’s eyes widen, his heart clenching at the words. “Do you… Do you not want to do this?” he asks, half-dreading the answer. He’d thought they were both on the same page here, but what if… What if…

“What?” TK frowns, crossing the room in three quick strides to meet Carlos. “Babe, no, of course I want to. It’s a good kind of scary, I promise.”

“You sure?” Carlos scans his boyfriend’s face, searching for any hint of doubt or anxiety. But there is none, and TK just smiles, kissing Carlos’s cheek.

“A thousand percent,” he says. “It’ll be fun.”

(‘Fun’ isn’t the word Carlos would give to what came next. ‘Frustrating’, possibly. Or ‘exhausting’. Maybe even ‘interminable’.)

(But, at the end of it all, they have a home. Their home. And Carlos can see their future taking shape before his very eyes.)

*

Domenic grins when he sees Carlos approaching him, and a part of Carlos regrets even agreeing to come. But he can hardly turn around now, so he forces a smile and slides into the chair next to him, extending a hand to shake. Domenic sends him a strange look at that, but obliges anyway, shaking Carlos’s hand with a surprising firmness.

“Hey,” he says, still smiling.

“Hey.” Carlos sighs, taking in Domenic’s bright eyes and warm, hopeful face, and decides, fuck it. “Look, before you say anything, I just want you to know that I’m not looking for anything right now. My friends set me up on that date with you—and it’s not that I don’t think you’re a good guy, I honestly do, but—”

“Carlos.” Domenic appears to be fighting off laughter, though he’s not entirely successful in it, a brief chuckle slipping past his lips. “You don’t need to explain yourself to me. I know it sounds hard to believe, but I really am okay with being friends. Not that I wouldn’t mind seeing where it goes, but…”

He trails off, seeing what must be obvious doubt on Carlos’s face. “Look, I’m kind of new in town, alright? I don’t really know many people around here, and I’m just...fuck, man. I’m lonely. So if you wanna be friends, then that’s incredible and more than enough for me. I swear.”

And Domenic is looking at him so earnestly that Carlos really has no choice but to believe him. He feels himself flushing a bright red, embarrassed at how self-centred and narcissistic he must have seemed, and a stammered apology is halfway out of his mouth when Domenic reaches over and lays a firm hand on his arm.

“It’s no big deal,” he says, patting once before drawing back. “I do want to ask, though, if you don’t mind? Why did you come on the date if you didn’t want to? Not many guys would.”

Carlos huffs a laugh. “My friends think I’m turning into a hermit. It’s an assessment that I...wouldn’t disagree with. Let’s just say you’re not the only one looking for a friend.”

Domenic’s eyebrows quirk up in interest. “Oh? Anything to do with your unwillingness to date? I mean, a guy like you—it’s hard to imagine that you don’t have men practically throwing themselves at you. Maybe even literally. How come you’re still single? Is there...someone else?”

Carlos’s whole body tenses at the question, his gaze dropping to his hands and his heart in his shoes. Tension lies thick in the air, and he feels the sudden urge to flee, but he’s rooted to his chair, stuck under Domenic’s scrutiny.

“Shit,” Domenic says, voice hushed. “Carlos, I—I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to… Fuck, forget I said anythin—”

“I was engaged.”

Carlos hadn’t meant to say it. He doesn’t know why he did. It’s just… He hasn’t really talked about TK properly with anyone in the three years since; his friends were all TK’s friends too, and they all knew him—knew them.

This is the first time he’s actually spending time with someone who didn’t know, and it’s not freeing exactly, but it’s the first time he feels free to speak about TK the way he wants to, without anyone else’s memories looming over it.

“I’m not anymore, obviously,” he laughs wryly, finally managing to look back up at Domenic, finding shock on his face. “It was… It ended.”

Domenic’s mouth opens and closes several times before he’s able to pull himself together enough to speak. “Who called it off?” he asks—which was not what Carlos was expecting. “Because if it was him, man. He really missed out there.”

Carlos hesitates a moment, then answers, “It was him. But it wasn’t on purpose.” He breathes out shakily, swallowing hard. “He died a month before the wedding.”

*

Carlos smirks as he hears a groan at his back, glancing over his shoulder to find TK pretending to bang his head on the table. “Having fun, babe?”

Another groan. “Let’s just elope. Let’s get married in some random courthouse by some random Texas official. That way we wouldn’t have to figure out stuff like a seating plan or—or what kind of cake knife to use. I mean, babe.” TK sends a pleading look in Carlos’s direction, and Carlos can’t help but laugh, cruel though it feels when TK’s wounded expression just gets worse.

“I’m pretty sure my mother and your dad would kill us if we did that,” he points out, causing TK’s mouth to twist.

“I hate it when you’re right.”

“No, you don’t.” Grinning, Carlos turns back to his chopping, except, when he reaches out for the next ingredient, he only meets empty space. “Mierda. TK, babe, can you run to the store? I forgot the chilis.”

“Can’t you just leave them out?”

There’s a hopeful note to TK’s tone, but Carlos stands firm—his cooking is the one thing he’s able to resist TK for. “You’d think you’d be used to spices by now,” he comments. “And the answer is no; go on. You’ll barely even taste them.”

TK mutters his disagreement, but he gets up and leaves anyway. Carlos watches him go, shaking his head fondly before returning to dinner. Technically, he could leave the chilis out, but he’s been brought up to consider even the mere suggestion as sacrilege, and he’s not planning on letting TK persuade him otherwise any time soon.

Twenty minutes later, he’ll regret that decision more than anything else in the world.

*

“Carlos, I’m so sorry. You don’t have to—”

“I want to. As long as you’re okay with it; I don’t want to just unload all over you.”

“It’s okay, I promise. What are friends for?”

*

Carlos frowns, checking the clock. TK should have been back by now; the store is only a five minute drive from their place, and surely he would have texted if he was going to be delayed. He’s about to call him himself when his phone starts ringing, TK’s name flashing up on the screen.

He sighs in relief, answering the call. “Did you get lost or something?”

Silence.

“TK?”

Nothing again, and Carlos’s panic starts to skyrocket. “TK!”

And, this time, he gets an answer.

“C-Carlos.”

Carlos’s heart drops into his stomach at the rasp of TK’s voice. He sounds like he can barely breathe—in fact, if Carlos strains to listen, he can hear stilted, ragged breaths coming through the phone’s speakers. TK is hurt, probably seriously, and, fuck, it was Carlos who sent him out in the first place, this is his fault, he—

“Carlos, please.”

He breaks out of his spiral and clutches his phone tight to his ear, racing around the house to get his shoes on and grab his keys. “TK, where are you? I’ll find you, I promise I will, and you’re gonna be just fine, okay?”

TK doesn’t speak for a few seconds, before, “No.”

Carlos screeches to a halt. “What?”

“I don’t—I can’t tell you where I am. I don’t know. And there’s—there’s no time. No— Someone found me, they called 9-1-1, but they won’t—there’s no time.”

“TK, don’t you dare give up, okay, don’t you dare talk like that. You just need to focus on my voice and stay awake for a little while longer and then they’ll get you to a hospital where they’ll fix you up. You’ll be good as new right in time for the wedding.”

“The wedding. Carlos, I—”

“And if this is your way of getting out of making all the decisions, then it’s a little bit over the top, you know? I mean, point proven and all that, but you could have just told me.” He’s getting hysterical now, he can feel it, standing in the middle of his front room trying to keep his fiancé alive and talking when he’s god-knows-where in god-knows-what condition.

But, as always, TK is there to centre him again. “Carlos, stop, please.”

Carlos doesn’t know if it’s the way TK’s voice is getting quieter and quieter, his energy obviously flagging, or if it’s his pleading tone, but he’s suddenly struck completely still. He can’t move a muscle, every sense tuned into whatever is happening on the other end of the phone.

“I don’t—I don’t want to spend the time we have left lying to each other,” TK eventually says, his words riding on broken breaths now. “I don’t want to leave you, but I think… No, I know that I have to now. I’m s-so sorry. I wish… I wish we…” A gasp, and a horrific cough that sounds like it’s tearing TK apart. “I love you.”

Carlos doesn’t get a chance to reply before there’s a loud thud, and it doesn’t take him long to figure out what caused it.

TK dropped the phone.

TK passed out.

It’s salt in the wound when, seconds later, Carlos hears the wail of sirens approaching the scene.

*

There are tears dripping down his face as he tells Domenic of the sheer, gut-wrenching panic and fear of those next few minutes.

How he’d been unable to put the phone down, instead listening as the screech of machinery and the raised voices of firefighters and paramedics drifted through the speakers.

How the noises had dimmed when they extracted TK, and how Carlos had strained to listen as the paramedics began to work on him.

And how, when he’d heard those final words, his world had come crashing down.

“I’m calling it. McRae, radio it in to the ME’s office.”

*

This isn’t happening.

Carlos cannot be sitting in his parents’ backyard, at his fiancé’s wake, in the same place and wearing the same suit that he was supposed to be getting married in a month from now.

He—

Fuck.

Carlos presses the heels of his hands into his eyes and curls in on himself, barely suppressing a moan of agony at the pain in his chest. He’s distantly aware of everyone’s gazes on him, but he can’t stop this tidal wave of emotion anymore than he can turn back time and change the fact that TK is dead and that Carlos failed him.

TK died all alone, and Carlos didn’t get the chance to say goodbye or tell him that he loved him. He couldn’t even bring himself to speak at the funeral—the one thing, the last thing he could do for the love of his life.

Instead, when it was his turn to speak, he’d been frozen in his chair, eyes locked on the coffin—(and, fuck, TK was in there, that was TK, fuckfuckfuck)—and Judd had had to take over.

Carlos hadn’t heard a word he'd said, though he’s sure it was beautiful, and everything that TK deserved.

Everything that Carlos couldn’t give him.

He failed him, he failed, he—

“No,” a hushed voice says, warm arms pulling him into a tight hug, and Carlos must have been talking aloud without realising because the voice keeps reassuring him. “You didn’t fail, sweetheart, you didn’t, I promise. You were there for him at the end and that’s all that matters; that he wasn’t alone when it happened. I know it hurts but it’s okay, it’s all going to be okay.”

Carlos tenses, wanting to scream at whoever’s holding him because how could anything possibly be okay? But when he pulls out of their grip, he sees that it’s Gwyn, her eyes red and cheeks tear-stained, and all Carlos can do is fall apart in his not-quite-mother-in-law’s arms.

She keeps whispering that it’s okay, and Carlos knows that it’s as much for her own benefit as for his.

*

“Hey sweetheart,” Carlos whispers, getting out of his car and leaning against the closed door. He always comes here when he wants to remember TK; it is where they said goodbye to him after all. And it’s the place where they had so many important moments—it’s where they became official, and where they finally spoke openly and completely with each other for the first time, and where they got engaged.

It’s their place, ridiculous as it might sound.

“Remember that night?” he asks, even now feeling a little self-conscious talking to the air. “I made you a picnic and we came out here to eat it and you somehow managed to get chocolate on your nose from the chocolate-covered strawberries.” Carlos chuckles, then sighs wistfully. “You were so beautiful. I had this whole plan to propose to you, but one look at your face and that damn bit of chocolate and I forgot the entire thing.

“I just blurted it out, right there and then. ‘Marry me, Tyler Kennedy’, and you said yes, and it was perfect.”

He blinks furiously, tears beginning to blur his vision. “I thought… But it was too perfect, I guess. Perfect things never last, and since I was never going to leave you, the universe forced you to leave me.

“I don’t know why I’m telling you all this. It’s nothing you don’t already know, and I’m not sure if I even believe that you can hear me. I never used to, back when we were together, but things change when suddenly the one who’s gone is someone you love. I’d give anything, Ty, anything to talk to you again, so I’m here.

“You know… Just in case.”

His hands tremble and he swallows reflexively against the pain and grief crawling up his throat. He reaches inside the car through the window and grabs the bouquet of flowers he brought with him off the passenger seat.

It’s the same one he always brings whenever he comes out here—red camellias, hydrangeas, blue salvias, and forget-me-nots—all flowers that have meaning to them and their relationship. Hydrangeas for understanding; it had been the first flower TK had given him, his way of saying thanks for sticking around even after their disastrous beginnings.

The camellia, Carlos had gifted TK one anniversary. It means ‘you’re a flame in my heart’, which TK always was, always, and Carlos had found it a little funny too, given TK’s background. TK had loved it, and had made sure to tell Carlos in as many ways as he could think of that he felt the same.

The salvias were something they both did, often and at random, sometimes with no particular reason. Just whenever they wanted each other to know they were thinking of them—though, that was something they knew anyway.

Carlos had added the forget-me-nots himself after… After it had happened. It’s a reassurance, both to him and to TK, that he’s not forgetting; that he never will.

That he can’t, even now, three years down the line.

On shaky legs, he walks over to the tree a little distance away, laying the bouquet between the roots almost reverently. Carlos stares down at them long after he’s straightened back up, leaning against the tree, and he allows the memories and the pain to overwhelm him for a moment.

“Can you believe it’s been three years?” he asks the empty air, shaking his head. “I swear, I still miss you like it was yesterday; it doesn’t seem real that I haven’t seen you or kissed you or heard your voice in three whole years.

“I’m going to see your dad later. He’s… He’s doing okay, all things considered. He misses you—we all do—but I think he tries to hide it, like he has to be the strong one for everyone else. Don’t worry though, Ty, we’re looking after him. Making sure he doesn’t, you know. Do anything stupid.

“Your mom helps out a lot too, her and Enzo and Isaac. God, TK you’d be so proud of Isaac now—he’s started school, making loads of friends, and he’s just… He’s such a good kid. I wish you could see him; he was so young when you— You’d be amazed at how big he’s getting. And, hey, we’re making sure that he knows who his big brother was, so...so don’t worry about that either.”

Carlos hesitates before continuing; it feels weird to talk about Domenic here. He doesn’t need to, he knows—technically, there’s nothing even going on between them, though Carlos couldn’t deny how good it had felt when Domenic had hugged him when they parted ways after coffee. But there’s been a weird lump of guilt sitting in his stomach since that first date at the bar, and Carlos figures that TK deserves to know about it.

Even if he’s three years dead and probably can’t hear any of this.

“I met someone, you know,” he says, trying to keep his tone light. “It’s not like that, we’re just friends, but I think… I think maybe it could be like that? Maybe? I don’t know, Ty. I thought I’d never be able to love anyone in that way ever again, but Domenic is so kind and sweet and he makes me wonder if there’s a chance.

“I’m terrified. It’s—It’s stupid and selfish, but I’m so scared of getting hurt again, of having to go through what I went through with you again. Not that I blame you for the accident, it’s just… I can’t do it again. I can’t.

“God, even considering this feels like I’m betraying you. I do hate you a little for that; you still own so much of my heart and I’m never getting it back, whereas all I have of you are your hoodies and your mugs and that goddamn stuffed bear. Why did you have to go and ruin me like that, huh? Why, TK?”

He’s almost shouting now, but the question fades unanswered into the air, and Carlos’s anger vanishes with it. “Fuck. I’m sorry. I didn’t… I don’t hate you. I love you so much, and I always will, but I think maybe it’s time for me to let some of that go. I can’t carry on like this for much longer; you understand that, right?”

And maybe he’s imagining it, or maybe it’s just a coincidence, but the breeze picks up a little then, gently ruffling Carlos’s curls, and it feels like… It feels like peace.

He closes his eyes, and for a moment, it’s like he can feel TK there, like he never left at all.

I know, it feels like, his voice ringing loud and clear in Carlos’s head. I love you.

“I love you, too,” Carlos whispers, opening his eyes. TK isn’t there, of course, but, somehow, he doesn’t feel so empty anymore.

Then, with one final glance at the flowers, Carlos turns and walks away, his heart feeling lighter than it has in three years.

#911lsangstweek #911 lone star #911 lone star fic #tarlos #tarlos fic #tk strand #carlos reyes #michelle blake #lone star #911ls #fanfiction #my fanfiction #writing #my writing #userbones #userjillian #tuserpaige #tuserjamie #reyeslonestartag

[liamloveslarry]

The Boy Who Cried Wolf~

okay i’ve posted some snippets below and i’ve kept the general theme the story flows in so far, however it may not make sense as i’ve purposefully left some things out but i think u can get a general vibe from it hopefully, idk let me know what you think bc it’s been ages since i’ve picked this up and i would love to finish and post it soon!

tw for one use of derogatory language, violence, body horror/gore, swearing, experimentation, surgery & fictional medicines, mild nsfw, use of guns but at the beginning - these all sounds worse than they are, but it’s a werewolf fic so there had to be some element of ~horror.

The ground beneath Harry is hard and damp. 

He can feel the wetness soak through into his already sodden socks from where his shoes had come off in the brawl, and it reminds him of being young and spilling ice cubes on the floor, trying to hastily clean the water up with his foot and feeling the cold cling to his toes. 

He squeezes his fists together and bends his head between his knees, breathing deep. 

There’s a chill in the air and the frost nips at his nude body, causing goosebumps to flare in his skins wake so fast it stings as they burst through his flesh. 

His long hair acts as a barrier against the frigid air, but every time he rocks back, the metal bars stood tall behind him hiss against his skin and cause him to whimper and growl. 

He looks up and wraps his arms around his knees, shielding what little modesty he has left. 

He can see two guards standing either side of the cell, each holding firearms in their sturdy arms. Their fingers on the trigger ready to shoot if Harry so much as thought about doing something he shouldn’t. 

There’s another body to the right of him that looks in bad condition. He can smell it before he sees it. The person’s leg appears to be injured judging by the sluggish trail of blood that’s pumping into a puddle on the floor, and there are multiple cuts and grazes across their torso and face. 

Deep enough that Harry can see muscle and bone. Deep enough that Harry can’t tell if it’s a man or a woman.

If he focuses enough, he can hear them breathing. 

Or maybe that’s just himself.

Harry’s feet scuffle on the floor as he tries to get a closer look, but it causes one of the guard’s head to twist towards him and narrow his eyes, gripping his gun even tighter as he opens his big, fat mouth.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” He growls.

Harry whips his head up and looks him in the eye. He retracts his arm slowly from where he was reaching out to touch the person’s pulse point and places it on the floor.

The guards face is pinched and sweaty, as if he’d be afraid of Harry if there wasn’t a thick barrier of metal between them. He can hear the hitch in his breath when does so much as blink, confirming the theory further that he’s more afraid of Harry than Harry is of him.

“What am I doing here?” His voice his shot and gruff, a reminder of just two hours previous when he’d been snarling and shouting, trying to tear chunks of flesh from their bodies out of fear while they’d held him down and stunned him into submissive shock.

He doesn’t remember much after being shoved into the back of a truck and led to where he assumes, he is now, cooped up in a dingy cell with a half rotting body and two wankers as company.

The guard punches out a laugh, the tip of the gun clanging against the metal as his body jerks forward. It causes Harry to wince as the sharp sound penetrates his ear drums.

“For a dog I thought you’d be smarter. But it looks like you’re just another dumb bitch.”

Harry’s fingers catch against the grain of the floor as the tip of his claw protrudes and causes the concrete to shift and crumble beneath him. He can’t help the rumble in his chest while the thought to bare his teeth becomes more prominent each second the guard smirks and cocks his gun mockingly at Harry’s head. 

“Calm down puppy, it’s not even a full moon yet so I dunno why you’re gettin’ all hyped up.” 

Harry doesn’t feel himself move but he can see the guard’s eyes sweep across his form, right from the tips of his toes to his hairline as he clenches his gun tighter, which means he now must be standing. 

He knows better than to step forward, knowing he’ll probably get shot if he dares so much as inch his pinky out. 

He can feel his bones shift and his muscles twinge, and there’s a deep throbbing coming from his thigh which he only notices now. As he casts his eyes down, he can see it’s torn and open. There must be something slowing the healing as usually something like that would’ve closed up by now.

“Tell me why I’m here.”

The guard cocks his eyebrow.

“No.”

Harry’s hands clasp into fists and he takes a deep breath.

“Tell me why I’m here.”

He can see the guard smirking, albeit if he narrows his eyes slightly, he can still see his pulse jumping under his skin as if trying to scramble from his body. He shifts his hip slightly to take the weight off his injured leg, causing his cock to slap against his thigh.

The guard’s eyes drift down and this time it’s Harry’s turn to smirk.

“What’s the matter? Never seen one this big before?”

The guards face turns red and he splutters, his pig face scrunching up as if he’d sucked on a sour lemon and he scrambles to point his gun through the bars and at Harry.

“Shut the fuck up you fucking dog! I swear to god I’ll blow your fucking brains out you mutt, you utter cu- “

“That’s enough.”

They both whip their head towards the second guard as his hand inches out and places it on the other guard’s gun, pushing it down slowly.

“You!”, he says, eyes piercing into the other man and gritting his teeth, “need to shut your fucking gob and stop riling Lassie up; and you!”, he turns and sweeps his gaze over Harry’s form, boots coming to rest against the edge of the metal, “need to stop asking so many sodding questions and shut up.”

Harry blinks down at his wet socks and frowns.

“Can I at least have some clothes?”

The second guards gaze lingers on his abdomen.

“No,” he smirks, eyes trailing upwards and resting on Harry’s face, “I’m rather enjoying the view.”

Harry growls out “fucking pervert” and doesn’t think twice before moves his foot forward, which causes the first guard to panic and fire his gun. 

The bullet doesn’t pierce his skin, but it’s made of something hard and it smacks full force him in the chest, instantly knocking him backwards and winding him.

He can see both of the guards arguing and waving their arms at each other, but his hearing has gone woofy so he can’t understand what they’re saying. 

The room is starting to spin and the pain in his thigh and upper chest are getting worse, causing Harry to sway on the spot and collapse onto his knees.

The last thing he remembers is the sound of an alarm before his vision blurs and turns to black.

~

It was dark by the time he’d left the office, nodding and waving at the receptionist who was sat in the tiny booth on his way out. It had also been raining, which Harry realises now he probably should’ve driven in, but the morning had been so frosty and clear with dew drops settling on autumn leaves, that he couldn’t help but walk through the winding paths and bramble bushes to get to work. Even if it did take him thirty minutes.

He remembers pulling his hood up and walking down the road until he reached a narrow ginnel that acted as a bridge between the small town and his house.

It had been here he’d been attacked.

At first, he thought it was just somebody mugging him and he knew it wasn’t best placed to chomp his way out of it, it wouldn’t look too good if a local hooligan had been found with teeth marks imprinted onto his skin, so he’d done his best to ignore him, promptly shoving them off; only to realise there was two of them and one had what looked to be a gun.

Stunned, he’d tried to run but they’d pinned him down and cast a sickening blow to his stomach. It had caused Harry to go into sensory overload as he could smell the cheap cigarette smoke on their collars and their nasty breath wafting up his nostrils, causing him to heave and snarl. It was only a matter of time before his abilities kicked in and his claws and teeth had decided to make an appearance. He’d nicked of the men on his jaw and tried to bite his neck, but the other man held an electric rod against his ribs and shocked him.

~

She’s fair skinned and has light brown hair that��s held up in a ponytail. She doesn’t say much as she checks the stats on the monitor screen, but Harry does his best to smile whenever she looks over at him.

“Hey. What’s your name?”

She startles and nearly drops her clipboard, grasping it at the last second before it falls to the floor. She looks at him wide eyed and says nothing.

“I’m not going to do anything, I promise”. He grins and wiggles his fingers slightly in the straps. “Not like I can do anything, anyway.”

She stares at him for a beat longer and lowers her head.

“Mary.” She mumbles, fiddling with the pen and twisting it in her fingers.

Harry smiles again and tries to get her to look up.

“Mary. That’s a nice name. My name’s Harry, but I’m guessing you already know that.”

She blushes and looks away, busying herself with the buttons on the monitor and biting her bottom lip. 

She’s nervous, Harry can sense it. But if he wants to get out of here semi-unscathed, he needs to play nice with those who so far, haven’t been very nice to him. She seems kind enough anyway, judging by the fact that she wasn’t poking any fingers into his wounds or prodding at his teeth.

“I know you probably can’t say much, and I understand that; I really do, but.” He sighs and looks down. “Please can you tell me where I am?”

She continues to ignore him, taking out a needle and flicking the cap. She pumps it a few times and Harry watches as the liquid inside begins to bubble up.

She goes to inject the tip into his thigh but he catches her wrist just as she was about to press in, claws forming a shield around her delicate bone.

She looks up at him wide eyed, her breathing heavy and scared.

“Mary, please. Please tell me where I am. I won’t let go until you say something.” He can feel her small hand trembling but he isn’t going to give up without a fight.

Her fingers squeeze tighter around the needle and she tries to force the tip into his skin, but his hold is stronger and she lets out a gasp.

“Please stop, you’re hurting me.” 

“I’m sorry, I will, I promise. But not until after you tell me where I am.”

Her fingers seem to seize and stop, dropping the instrument onto the bed and her quiet, shaking voice splits the silence open like a knife cutting through paper.

~

He can smell the winter air and the frost settles in his bones, calming him instantly. He’s also very aware that he’s still in a gown and participating in a full moon event of his own. 

He’s about to step over the threshold when a hand tugs him back.

Harry turns around, and he sees Mary for the kid she is. Barely an adult and shivering in the cold.

Her nose has turned red already.

~

He lets out a ragged sob and pounds his fist against the floor. He tries to move his leg and bend his arms to press against the solid ground so he can at least heave himself up when he notices a beaming light coming towards him. He turns his head and sees through tears, rain and the dirt prickling his eyelids, the headlights of a car that’s heading his way.

The car eventually slows down to a stop in front of him, but he can’t see much through the business of the windscreen wipers and the headlights shining in his eyes. He must look a right state right now, and he’s shocked the car even stopped for him. 

If it was him, he would’ve kept on driving. 

There’s a click and the engine turns off. The lights stay on, albeit they’re dimmed a touch. 

The car door opens from the driver’s side and a man dressed in a parka and joggers hesitantly makes his way around the front of the car.

There’s silence for a few moments until the man opens his mouth.

~

Harry doesn’t know how long they drive for. He’s content to just let the sound of the quiet radio wash over him while he huddles into the blanket more, directing his toes underneath the heater. He appreciates that Louis probably has a multitude of questions he’s dying to ask, but instead he keeps his mouth shut, humming along to the radio every now and then.

They drive through the tiny town of Barnstable and the car jostles as they drive over cobbled streets and the sporadic pothole. The occasional light flickers from the shore to the right of them, but other than that the streets are as dark and as quiet as the night sky.

They tumble upwards towards a hill and Louis leads them through winding roads and sharp bends. On a particularly keen one, the car lingers to one side and Harry’s thigh moves with the turn, bashing slightly against the inside of the car door.

He winces and Louis catches it, sending a look of sympathy his way.

“Sorry, mate. Won’t be long now – another couple of minutes.” He nods down at Harry’s leg which has started to seep blood through the material. “We’ll get that patched up straight away, just try and keep some pressure on it for now.”

Harry takes a deep breath and nods, wrapping a part of the blanket around his fist and pressing it harder against the wound.

~

He grabs some shampoo from the holder that’s stuck to the wall and squirts a generous amount into his palm, rubbing his hands together and lathering it through the strands. He does the same with the shower gel and starts to wash his body as he thinks.

What he remembers from the night feels fragmented and broken, tail ends of memories flashing before they disappear. He sighs and dips his head backwards underneath the water and washes the shampoo out. 

Whatever they shot him with must’ve delayed or hindered his healing abilities as usually anything superficial or worse, only takes around an hour to heal. Granted he’s never been shot before, it should’ve only taken a little longer before it had fully closed up, instead it had gotten worse the longer the bullet had been trapped inside his leg, rooted underneath muscle and skin.

He looks down and feels as well as sees, his skin starting to knit back together. Bits of flesh fusing as one around the stitches like solder to an iron. He doesn’t know what he’ll say to Louis in terms of there no longer being a wound or a scar left in its wake, but he figures he probably doesn’t need to be semi-nude around him again, so he decides not to say anything.

He scrubs the last remnants of dirt from his body and turns to switch the shower off, taking his time to grab the towel left for him on the radiator and wrapping it around his waist. 

He pads over to the mirror and looks at his reflection.

His eyes are slightly bloodshot and his cheekbones look hallow. His long hair is dripping lukewarm water down his chest and onto the floor, but he can’t find the energy in him to do something about it.

~

He spins towards Harry, blue eyes tired and sleepy, with a soft smile etched onto his face. He lifts his arm to ruffle the back of his hair and his arm muscle expands slightly, filling out the sleeve of his hoodie. It makes Harry swallow, a quiet click due to his dry throat echoing through the room.

“You’ll be okay in here, right?” Louis asks. “You know where the bathroom is and there’s some spare toothbrushes in the drawer, feel free to get up when you want and have another shower and stu- oh!” Louis pauses and places his hand into his hoodie pocket, pulling a small box out. “There’s some paracetamol here in case you need them in the middle of the night for your leg – pretty sure there’s a spare glass in the bathroom too, just in case you didn’t wanna stick your head under the tap.” He places the box down onto the bedside table and throws a smile Harry’s way.

Harry won’t need them but he nods and smiles anyway, yawning out a thank you. He forgets momentarily that Louis is still in the room when he starts taking the hoodie off, and only remembers when a cough sounds out against the silence and he whips his head up.

~

Harry unclicks his seatbelt and goes to open the car door when Louis’ hand stops him. He turns back. 

Tired, green eyes meet concerned, blue ones.

“Just.” Louis pauses. “Just be careful out there, okay?” Harry stays silent while Louis’ fingers tighten around his arm. 

It doesn’t feel unsafe.

“When I found you, I thought you were dead. I haven’t asked you what happened because I assumed you’d tell me when you were ready. And you still don’t have to if you don’t want to.” He rushes to say, then pauses to stroke his thumb lightly over Harry’s arm, hair standing to attention and swaying under soft material and fingertips. “So just, be careful. Please.”

His eyes feel like they’re boring into Harry’s soul, each pupil filled with worry and pleading as if for Harry to promise him. Harry doesn’t know what to do, so he gently places his hand on top of Louis’ and smiles kindly.

“I promise. It was just a,” how does he word this “– a bad night. And hopefully it won’t happen again.” He figures he might have to verbalize what happened one day, but today is not that day. Where would he even start? ‘Thanks for saving my life and oh, by the way, I’m a werewolf?’

One headache is enough for now.

Louis looks at him for a second longer and breathes out, squeezing his arm one last time and dropping his hand back down, resting it on his thigh.

“I’ll call you.”

Harry nods and opens the car door, turning back one last time.

“Thank you, for everything.”

~

Making his way through to the living room, he flicks the light on and watches as dust bunnies flit about the air, as if to say welcome home. The machine to the right of him is flashing relentlessly, signifying there are messages waiting for him. He presses the voicemail button and listens as a robotic voice, followed by a woman’s, floats through the speaker.

Beep. Three new messages.

Beep. First Message.

“Hi, love. It’s only me. Just checking to make sure you’re alright? I know you said you had a busy week so wanted to catch up before the weekend.”

Beep. End of first message. 

Beep. Second message.

“Hi, Harry. Me again. Not sure if you got my first message and I know you’re probably having a minute to yourself after work, but just give me a call back when you get this.”

Beep. End of second message.

Beep. Third message.

“Harry, it’s me. It’s nearly 8 o’clock and I haven’t heard anything. I’m starting to worry, will you ring me back, please? I swear to god if something’s happe-yes! I’m ringing him again, he’s not answering, Har-”

Beep. End of third message.

No more messages.

~

If he listens carefully enough, he can hear the hedgehog’s tiny teeth tear through the slop, gurgling as he swallows. Small wheezes puff through his narrow nostrils when he pauses, the spikes on his back sparkling under the stars. Harry’s eyes adjust better than any humans could while his ears hone in on the sounds around him. Voles and mice race through the grass, snatching worms and bugs alike. Owls hoot in the distance while foxes rummage through bins, rubbish galore. He can even hear the moths fluttering their tiny wings as they quiver and vibrate through the dark.

The plate is nearly empty when he hears something snap. Even Bob pauses licking the ceramic to sniff the air; black, beady eyes darting right to left. He must think they’re in the clear when he starts moving again, nifty nose nudging through wet food. Harry continues to watch the garden when he hears another snap. 

This time it’s louder.

Claws replace fingernails and grip the step below him, twists of PVC twirling underneath sharp talons as they’re sliced from the ledge. 

Forgive him for he usually wouldn’t be this on edge, however getting oneself kidnapped and tortured has made even the scariest of monsters slightly fearful.

Though his eyesight is much like that of a hawk, he can’t see anything out of the ordinary. The bushes and leaves sway slowly in the breeze, every now and then a hoot echoes in the distance.

He stops breathing when he feels something brush against his ankle and his claws pierce the delicate skin of his palm; but he realises when he looks down that it’s just Bob nuzzling between his sock clad feet, trying to reach a meaty grub that’s getting away. He lets out a sigh and closes his eyes, counting to ten in his head. He shifts his feet so his three-legged friend can reach his dessert. He decides it’s enough for one night and reaches down to pick the plate up. He stands and casts his eyes around the garden one more time, settling on a tree branch that rests over the fence. He doesn’t know how long he stares at it until he feels the chill of the air whip against his face. Blinking out of his stupor, he shakes his head and lets out a small huff, breath casting white shapes into the cold air. 

“Bed,” he whispers, “just go to bed, Harry.”

~

It’s the middle of the night when he needs the toilet, bladder unrelenting as he shuffles sleepily out of the tent, torch in one hand as he makes his way over to a nearby tree. He’s resting his palm against the trunk when he hears a snap and a low moan coming from somewhere next to him. He tries to hurry his peeing as fast as he can, shaking himself off and guiding himself back into his shorts when something barges into him, slamming him down onto the forest floor.

His head knocks against the ground and he groans, mind going fuzzy. He can’t see for shit what’s on top of him but it’s dark and big and it’s groaning. Rumbling screams clutching at his bones. He tries to shake it off but it’s larger than Harry, at least seven foot and it drags him about like prey. He goes limp and cold, as if his mind is disconnected from his body. All he can remember is a white-hot flash of pain from where the thing had sunken its jaws into Harry’s side, teeth seizing around his rib cage and pulling, twisting, sinking. He remembers trying to scream but no sound escaped his lips. It was like he was watching from above. Watching as his body was tugged and heaved from left to right. Sharp claws scratched and hooked at his hip bones, making sure he couldn’t get away.

He could feel blood oozing out from where he’d been bitten and torn at, and the pain he felt was almost blinding. His fingers twitched at his side until they felt something smooth and hard. In a moment of sheer adrenaline, Harry had lifted what he assumed was a rock and slammed it down onto the thing’s head, once, twice, three times. Until its jaws had become loose and its teeth unclenched from around his bones. Blood spurted onto his face, lining his lips and staining his eyelashes. The thing went limp and sagged against Harry’s body, white eyes rolling back into its split skull as it shivered, seized and stopped.

He remembers pushing it off his body as best he could and trying to scramble away from it, bare feet and toes digging into the soft earth as he pushed himself backwards. He gulped when he hit the back of a tree and lay panting, hands shaking as they touched his side, feeling nothing but hollow bone and air. Looking down there was only red. Torn flesh and muscle protruding and dangling down as if no longer part of his body.

He remembers sobbing as he blinked through the tears and tried to get a good look at the figure lying dead in front of him. Holding both hands against where he’d been bitten and pulled apart like leftovers.

He remembers looking up at the sky above him, the moon big and bold as she stared back at him.

He remembers feeling like he was going to die.

~

A book is placed into Harry’s hands and he looks confused at the two men before Zayn just nods his head at the item, encouraging Harry to open it. 

“What is this?” He asks.

“Just read it.” Niall says, blinking at Harry.

It’s black and the corners are worn. It isn’t a big book either by any means, but it’s chunky and smells of old leather. Indented in gold on the front page are what look to be like nymphs and needles, wound tight around flesh as if both are becoming one. He turns to the first page and registers the thin, waxy paper.

~

Harry nods, doesn’t feel as though he can speak properly before stepping onto the train. His foot barely reaches the entry when his name is called behind him. He turns his head and sees Zayn walking up to him.

“I,” he coughs, looking around him a touch awkwardly, Niall turns away and bends down, pretending to busy himself with his shoelace. “Stay safe, yeah?” 

He pulls something out of his pocket and presses it into Harry’s hand. “Call us if you need us, anytime. I mean it.”

And with that he’s spinning around and walking up to Niall, clapping him on the back and nodding towards the exit. Harry tightens his fist around whatever Zayn had given him and ducks into the carriage, finding a seat near the far back and sitting down.

He rests his head against the cool glass and shuts his eyes.

Tries to keep his racing thoughts from becoming nightmares.

~

Page 37.

Sally.

ne.re.id. sea.nymph. mer.ma.id.

August 13th 1989. 15:07pm.

Found near the North coast of Portknockie in Scotland. Terrain is rocky and waves were at high speed. Out of plain sight to any passersby, however not so hidden she wouldn’t have been spotted by cliff dwellers. Water is salty meaning she has not swum from any freshwater rivers or lakes. Around 250cm in length, including the tail which has been jaggedly severed from fin upwards. The creature is unconscious but has a strong heartbeat. A mixture of morphine and hematide has been administered into the left arm of the creature and she remains stable. 

Despite her long frame, she has a petite torso and fine hair decorating her entire upper half. Subject has dark hair and green eyes. They seem to change to lilac under fluorescent lighting while her pupils dilate. She speaks in broken sentences, mostly garbled hums and high-pitched warbles.

Subject has webbed fingers and sharp nails. Subject also does not have a belly button nor any eyebrows.

Harry’s fingers freeze around the handle of his mug and he places it down onto the table shakily, taking another steady breath inwards. Outside the bin men are talking joyously as the disposal unit crunches in the distance while the neighbours next door are having yet another argument about who’s turn it is on the computer. But nothing registers, and Harry can only focus on the words standing stark against yellow stained paper below him.

~

September 7th 1989. 14:24pm.

Subject ‘Sally’ has been prepped for surgery. Subomunex was dispensed into the subject’s neck gills. We have found this to be most effective when operating on water-based creatures as it releases certain toxins and nutrients to ensure the subject can breathe without the need for H20.

Research into the common cold occurred almost one year ago, and we have found certain elements that make up a nereid’s larynx fight most, if not all symptoms of a ‘sore throat’. Today we shall create a medium incision into the subject’s neck muscle and remove the larynx, most commonly known as the voice box, from the subject’s throat. Delicate strands of tissue and muscle will be removed and sent to the Section B lab where it will be tested and if successful, dispensed into edible capsules and distributed among Pharmacies across the UK. 

A tiny proportion of the larynx’s genetic makeup will be extracted and re-created to ensure there is enough material for us to provide in the long term.

There’s a picture underneath the paragraph of what looks to be a theatre and Sally stretched out along a bed, four doctors are also in the photo, two standing either side of the creature and if Harry squints, he can see their smiles through their surgical masks.

~

“H-hello?”

There’s silence before the other person speaks.

“Uh…is this Harry?”

He doesn’t register the voice and his brows furrow in confusion, nose sniffling.

“Uh, yeah? Who’s this?”

“It’s um, Louis?” the voice replies, “I picked you up from the middle of the road, uh. About a week ago?”

God, has it really only been a week?

All of a sudden, his eyes widen in stark realisation and he clutches the phone tighter in the palm of his hand.

“Oh! God, I’m so sorry, hi. How are you?”

There’s a little huff of laughter and Harry imagines Louis’ eyes crinkling.

“Yeah, I’m alright, mate. Are you? You sound a little…off.”

Harry leans against the living room wall and rolls his head sideways, “uh,” he glances at the book, “just a sad film, proper got to me, had a little cry as you do.”

~

“I should probably leave.” Harry says, and carefully dislodges Cliff’s head from his leg, placing it down gently onto the couch cushion beneath him. He doesn’t even move, just wiggles his back slightly and twitches his paw from where it’s resting in mid-air.

“If this is about you dribbling on me, I really don’t care. I’ve had worse things on me.”

Harry’s blush darkens, and he mumbles out, “it’s not about the dribble thing, I just think I should go.”

He stands up and makes his way into the hallway, vaguely aware Louis is talking to him, but the words are muffled against the heavy sound of Harry’s beating heart. He grabs one of his shoes and slips it on his foot, patting down his chest and pockets, trying to search for his keys while shielding his face so Louis doesn’t see how red his cheeks have become.

“-think you should just stay the night.”

Harry’s in the middle of slipping on his other shoe, when he braces his arm against the wall to stop him from tripping up, and turns to face Louis who’s piercing Harry with his gaze, despite the warm flush that’s expanding across his face.

“What?”

“I said, I think you should just stay the night.”

“I-,”

“I don’t mean, um,” Louis huffs a laugh, a telltale pink blooming on his cheeks, “in my room, or anything. I meant the spare room again, if you want?” He places his hands into his jean pockets and rocks back a little on his feet, “it’s just really frosty outside, and dark, so I’d feel pretty shitty if I let you drive back now.”

“Lou-“

“Sorry if it sounds like I’m being pushy, I don’t mind, really! It’s just,” he sighs, lips pursing and fingers reaching out to scratch at the chipped paint on the wall, “I’d just hate for something to happen, y’know, like last time,” he murmurs quietly, a sad sort of smile sweeps across his lips and he looks down, shrugging his shoulders.

You’d think what happened that night fucked him up a little too.

Maybe it did.

After all, he was the one who made sure Harry was alright and pulled a bullet from his leg, right over where Harry casts his eyes into the kitchen.

~

He groans and lifts his body to sit upright, leaning down and massaging his leg with his hand. 

He drops his head forward and sighs, insides feeling like they were going to jump out of his skin any second and run off the excess energy without him. He stands up and stretches, fingers pointing upwards towards the ceiling while his back cracked along his spine. 

It felt like a shift, bones and muscles repositioning under flesh, like tectonic plates moving and slotting into the different crevices of his body. But it wasn’t time, and Harry had learned to control the urge quite early on after he’d found himself naked in the local park after a midnight stint, bleary eyes opening to find ducks quacking nervously in the pond and a jogger staring at him with his mouth hanging open; probably wondering what he was doing lying there nude at four in the morning. He wasn’t too far from home that he couldn’t sprint back in time that nobody else noticed him, covering his delicate parts with his hands as he ran through the streets in the milky morning light. 

His clothes had been torn to shreds and he doesn’t remember much, not a great deal of evidence either from the night before other than the dirt that had gathered underneath his fingernails and twigs in his hair. He also felt different somehow, as if his body finally relaxed into itself and took one huge breath out.

~

Louis slides the door fully open then and steps into the room, toes sinking into the plush carpet beneath him. He isn’t wearing anything other than his boxers and Harry’s very aware he’s in just the same. 

“Can’t sleep?”

Harry shakes his head, fingers spreading out along the bed and clutching at the tight bottom sheet, trying hard not to think about how Louis’ shut the door behind him, not fully, but just enough to bathe the majority of the room in moonlight and heavy whispers.

“Me neither.” Louis huffs, lips morphing into a small smile and feet shuffling forward. “Feel like my body’s just pent up, y’know? Usually I’m out like a light.”

“Same.” Harry replies. “My brain won’t switch off so I’ve just been,” don’t tell him you’ve been snooping, “counting sheep.”

“And the bang?” Louis laughs.

“Oh! Uh, I just got up for some water and tripped into the bedside table.”

Harry doesn’t think about how it’s becoming easier and easier to lie.

“Do you need anything for it?” Louis asks, coming closer as if trying to inspect Harry’s foot. His toes scrunch inward under the careful scrutiny, as if they don’t want Louis to see how unblemished they really are.

There’re only a few feet between them now and Harry can feel the sleepy heat radiating from Louis’s body, can count the chest hairs that sit between his pecs and can smell the fabric conditioner of his bed sheets caught up in the hairs on his arms.

“No, I think I’m good.” He swallows, throat clicking and fingertips twitching beside him as if they’re aching to reach out and feel just how soft Louis’ skin is underneath quivering patterns of swirly flesh.

“Okay.” Louis whispers, eyelids blinking slowly, heavy with heady want, tongue inching out to lick his dry lips.

#the boy who cried wolf #mine #pls dont post this anywhere #i know its long but it would be lovely if u could tell me what u think #i know its a little different #sally is my fave but im biased #sorry not sorry for leaving it on a cliffhanger

[freelancearsonist]

February Fic Recs!

Hi everyone! I’ve realized that part of the problem with interaction within the fic community is that not as many larger creators are doing their part to reblog and recommend fics like they used to when I first joined Tumblr. And while I wouldn’t really consider myself a “large” blog, I still want to do my part to help boost my fellow creators :) So here’s a list of what I read this month!

02.01 // “a letter addressed to the manager of the letter room” by @propertyofabelmorales (Richard Alsonso-Munoz) // I’ve read this at least three times omg because it’s currently the only Richard content we have and it’s wonderfully written and the letter format is unique but really interesting and so fitting given the character so yeah 10/10 please keep ‘em coming Vic 😂

02.02 // “Walls that Come Down” by @houseofthirst (Nathan Bateman) // this made me horny and made me cry at the same time and I think it’s really unfair that you have the power to do that to me tbh 😂 This is so wonderfully written and such a beautiful take on Nathan’s character and ugh lemme go cry in my corner

02.03 // “Meet Me on Endor” by @autumnleaves1991-blog (Poe Dameron) // “You are so beautiful, all the time” made me tear up a little bit because it’s so distinctly Poe and I also horny cried because god I’d give anything for this man

02.04 // “In the Night” by @jawabear (Santiago “Pope” Garcia) // this was emotional and beautiful and sexy all at once and it made me cry a lil bit in bed at 2am and honestly I thank you for it

02.05 // “Something About You And I” by @sacklerscumrag (Poe Dameron) // This was beautifully written and also so so so sexy and I realized I might have a bit of unresolved bondage kink while reading this so thanks for that 😂

02.06 // “The Night That Follows” by @roanniom (Poe Dameron) // I found this kind of by accident and then it turned out to be one of the most beautiful fics I’ve ever read in my life??? I’m seriously like trembling how can someone pack so much talent into one sexy fic I’m—

02.07 // “The Punishment” by @mandorush (Santiago “Pope” Garcia) // This is so fucking sexy what the fuck and then I found out it’s a whole series??? Yeah so needless to say my 2am binge was entirely worth it omg 🤤

02.08 // “Dessert is on the Counter” by @nathan-bateman (Abel Morales) // I read this before you posted to make the moodboard but I’ve legit reread like seven times since then omg. A quality fic in every way. 10/10

02.09 // “Affection” by @wasicskosgirl (Llewyn Davis) // This is one of my all-time favorite fics for my favorite man 😭 everything about this is so cute and I would literally die to snuggle with this sweet boy 😭

02.10 // “Tell Me” by @rebellou (Poe Dameron) // I don’t even know what to say omfg this is one of the hottest things I’ve ever read in my life and I’d like this fic chiseled onto my gravestone so I have something nice to take with me into the afterlife

02.11 // “Romantic Dreams” by @witchyavenger (Santiago “Pope” Garcia) // Yeah I want this holy hell this was so spectacularly written and so sexy and 😩 god I can’t even have kids but I wish he would breed me omg

02.12 // “Pressing Camera Questions” by @youvebeenlivingfictional (Nathan Bateman) // Omg this is so wonderfully constructed, even as something of an introductory piece to this series. I’m so excited to see what comes!

02.13 // “Free Fall” by @michaelperry (Mikael Boghosian) // There’s so little fic for Mikael on this site and so finding this kinda felt like striking gold 😂 especially because it’s so wonderfully writing and so sexy and 🤤

02.14 // #valentines fic tag by @propertyofabelmorales (Literally every Oscar Isaac character) // I got to read so many amazing fics today because of the Valentine’s fic exchange but shit dude you went above and beyond!! I wanted to only plug each author once on this fic rec calendar but there’s no way I couldn’t give you a shout out for this. Even in addition to your piece for the fic exchange you wrote so much incredible fic for literally every character I can think of (including Marcus!!!!!!!!! As I’m writing this you haven’t even posted his yet but I saw his name on the list and I’ve been having heart palpitations ever since) so yeah explore this tag because there’s fic for literally everyone and it’s all so wonderfully written and *chef’s kiss*

02.15 // “ghosts” by @unstoppableforcce (Javier Peña) // This one gave me CHILLS omfg this is just the first part and I was rolling on the ground. Everything about this is so beautifully constructed and haunting and UGH this is amazing 😭

02.16 // “Pretty” by @waatermelon-sugaar (Blue Jones) // Holy shit this unlocked like seven kinks that I didn’t even know I had 🤤 this was so wonderfully written and so sexy and realistic? Idk if that’s a good descriptor but like I could feel everything you were describing sdkfdkfjdkfj I LOVED THIS

02.17 // “home.” By @pascal-isaac (Llewyn Davis) // Look I wish I was kidding when I say that I’ve read this fic upwards of seven times sdkjskdjskd this is one of my all-time favorite fics and it only gets hotter with age 😩 this fic is like a fine wine and I would like to have it inscribed on my tombstone when I inevitably escape from this plane of existence

02.18 // “Turning to the Dark...” by @mylifeisactuallyamess (First Order!Poe Dameron) // If I’m being honest I’m not usually a fan of darker fics but this one worked for me. It was so sexy and honestly kind of beautiful in the way you describe the interrogation and later Poe’s willful turning. I really enjoyed this and will probably read again 🥺

02.19 // “My Best Decision” by @knivesareout​ (Javier Peña) // Fuck guys I’ve had baby fever like a motherfucker this month and this made it so much worse 😂 Dad!Javi is so fucking cute omg and this fic was SO SEXY and it really hit all of my bases 😩

02.20 // “my sweet baby” by @writingletterstothefire (Santiago “Pope” Garcia) // Look I’ve read this fic 293394 times and it’s good EVERY TIME. Dirty Dancing is the good kush and this fic made my obsession with that movie like 1000 times worse omfg. I read this every time I’m in a bad mood and it just puts a smile on my face so fast omg I would literally beg for a longer version

02.21 // “Sounds of Silence” by @veuliee2 (Orestes) // This fic? This fic right here? Lives rent free in my mind. To the truest capacity of the statement. I wish I was kidding when I say that not a single day goes by where I don’t think about this. I don’t even really know what to call this? Maybe Something along the lines of associates to lovers? Whatever this qualifies as it’s literally one of my absolute favorite fics of all time and I will never forget the way you shattered and mended my heart with one story

02.22 // “Mr. & Mrs. Cooper” by @aellynera (Bud Cooper) // THIS IS BRILLIANT THE ENTIRE WAY THROUGH ok first of all that this is like one of two fics for this character 😂 but also this is the most beautifully, ironically constructed fic ever? Everything about this is entirely grasping and there’s THREE PARTS that are all just as good as the rest and 😩 I literally couldn’t ask for a more perfect fic

02.23 // “Catch” by @ollypopp (Poe Dameron) // This is a short drabble but I had to include it because DAMN this is so sexy and wonderful for such a short piece and I’ll be thinking about this for the next month so thank you 😂

02.24 // “Blooming most recklessly” by @writefightandflightclub (Evgeni Kolpakov) // This is so beautifully written while simultaneously being so sexy???? How do you do it Luna I am forever in awe of your talent 😭 I can just visualize everything he says and does so clearly and I’m so in love with this piece 😭💛

02.25 // “falling for you” by @luminouspoes (Poe Dameron) // This is the cutest thing ever wtf 😭😭 The pining is so strong even though it’s short and it’s just all around so wonderfully written and I must go cry in my corner now

02.26 // “Liability” by @honeymandos (Nathan Bateman) // THIS WAS GORGEOUS WTF I’m crying over some soft Nathan in this house tonight 😭 I was legit so worried for a while that he’d send reader away but then he CAVED and my heart sang hallelujah—

02.27 // “electric spark” by @woakiees (Duke Leto Atreides) // Hi I need everyone to read this please so it can destroy your body and live in your mind and occupy all of your waking thoughts like it does for me k thanks

02.28 // “The Child” by @starryeyedstories (Poe Dameron) // This was the sweetest thing ever what the heck 😭😭😭 I am eternally sobbing over this lil found family-ish vibe and dad!Poe is literally everything I’ve ever wanted and UGH I have to go cry for the next month

#fic rec #february fic recs #poe dameron x reader #santiago garcia x reader #nathan bateman x reader #richard alsonso-munoz x reader #mikael boghosian x reader #javier peña x reader #blue jones x reader #orestes x reader #bud cooper x reader #evgeni kolpakov x reader #leto atreides x reader

[crimsonandcloverwrites]

bhah ch7 can’t stop won’t stop

lmao Dani being like ‘we should wait to discuss kids til after we’re married’ yes doesn’t seem like a giant thing u should make sure u agree on before u make a major commitment at all

Dani is so in love with Jamie sdjkhdfkjg driving to her house on instinct and just like...gazing at her in her old t-shirt and sweats like you’ve finally seen the light girl just kiss her already

god I can’t believe I have 2 more chapters of them as adults just being the absolute perfect match for each other to get through before they finally kiss in ch 11 (i’m maninfesting it no one say anything) I am literally going to scream. Dani will like... feel a little off and it’s all “i need to go to Jamie’s house and also tell Jamie everything and she will make me tea and let me be myself without all the expectations and I will feel better” I AM VERY HAPPY SHE CAN BE THAT FOR YOU BUT ALSO CAN YOU SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE MS CLAYTON (actually I think she kind of does but she must extract herself from her real life first I guess)

oh no the new chapter is almost here I still have so much to read

forget ‘there was only one bed’ this is now a ‘there was only one tent’ stan blog only

thirsty Dani truly is the funniest I am so sorry ur suffering is so entertaining. Dani: literally whacks her finger with a mallet bc horny for Jamie. Me: uncontrollable chortling

the idea of Dani wrangling 8 year olds that are probably just about as tall as her is too funny. tiny legend

aww the lil background Hannah and Owen moments. cute

Dani in a big ol’ straw hat pls that’s so cute

this Jackie and Jamie situation..... GIVE US THE DEETS

hmmmmnnnnnngggg Jamie just straight down on her knees in front of Dani to tie her shoe lace I will absolutely let u have this gay panic Dani u don’t deserve to be made fun of right now

Jamie “I have a story” absolutely NOT

Viola, emerging from the lake in this no ghosts childhood friends story: surprise bitch

these two drunk idiots are literally teenagers dsjkhdfkgjh just get in ur tent

Dani, drunk in a tiny tent w the love of her life: hope this doesn’t awaken anything in me

when we finally get a Jamie on her knees redemption moment-

Dani, drunk in a tiny tent w the love of her life currently taking her clothing off: oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck (y’all really wanted to torture her this chapt huh?)

“dawn was a saffron colored suggestion peeking through a pinhole gap in the tent’s zipper” god that’s a pretty sentence can i pls borrow some talent

Jamie and Dani w kids is sooooo cute they have such a nice balance between them

just thinking about if teenage Jamie desperately in love w her bestie could see things now Dani being all into her w all her lingering looks etc how the fuckin turn tables

“Dani kept a firm grip on her sanity” lol

oh my god they’re both drenched in the tent w the soft lamplight and only their own bodyheat to keep warm whatever will they do

oh wait they also have the heat of their burning attraction to each other they’ll be toasty as anything

hhhhngggg abs

that’s like 4 mentions of Jamie on her knees aklhfdkjgkdjh enough

lads is it gay to imagine running ur fingertips over the scar on your friends back before pressing ur lips to it or...?

Jamie taking the time to teach Dani car things aww

lol not the smutty book

eddie honking at her gets so under my skin like my dude... my guy... stop

Dani thinking so hard about rain damp Jamie and how much she wanted to jump her while she’s in the car w her boyf and MIL. girl

imagine if we had to sit through a dani and eddie wedding before she finally managed to call this off how cursed

ayoooo Carson’s show I cannot wait. omg we get it this chapter too gbless this really is the Dani suffering hours

Jamie just so casually like.... not even flirting w Dani it’s all just kinda observations but every other thing she says makes Dani stop breathing skdhfdkfjh this is so good

Dani has like... a lack of object permanence but with Jamie feelings ok

pleeease the Dani Carson road trip that’s so cute I can just imagine what fun they would have had

uuughhh i wanna go to a sweaty bar n listen to loud music again

also would like a Jamie to press their hand to my lower back n make me lose my mind in a sweaty bar to loud music

this lil jamie dani carson trio is my faaaave

“Girls must be all over you.” and Jamie choking on her drink dsfkjsdhkf oh Dani u beautiful naive angel. god that’s so funny

Robin instantly going for Jamie... same bro

Carson’s lil found family band pls my heart is so full

Carson calling them his sisters n Jamie freezing up bby when are u going to accept these people care abt u and love u like family

Robin is so brazenly just like ‘ur hot’. a voice of the people i love her

Dani being lowkey jealous as IF Ms Taylor has eyes for anyone else babe

Carson knoooowwwwws. When do we get the Carson O’Mara biopic please I want his takes on everything I know they’re excellent

oh my god Jamie knowing Dani’s fave kind of pizza pls I love that so much (I can’t remember if it’s been mentioned in the past few chapters but I remember her being mad that Eddie didn’t in CH1? i love this lil detail) (also I literally just ate vegge pizza I feel so immersed in this experience)

dfkgjhdfkjgh Jamie licking her finger and Dani completely combusting this is so entertaining

fuck n then it gets all soft and about how they’ve been in love their whole lives this is emotional whiplash

Jamie constantly in protector mode but in this really quiet comforting way is so sweet I love her so much

god I just feel so bad for Dani that this kind of insane electricity she has with Jamie has probably never been a thing in her relationship w Ed bby u deserve someone that makes u feel like this

awww Carsons bf

Dani’s soul leaving her body when she sees them kissing oh no

Jamie giving Dani her jacket pleeease I am dying here... the romance of it all

and shariing cigarettes and intense looks these two really are somethin else

lmao even Robin is picking up on their vibes you two could level a building with the amount of tension between u

Dani’s moment of Realisation abt Carson n Jamie just being like... well yeah

lmao Dani subtly trying to figure out if Jamie is gettin’ it sdkgdfhkjgh

when these do two finally get together both of them are gonna be like... taken out by all of this. Dani has only ever known Eddie who just does not get her (and the fact that she is a lesbian so she’s never had real feelings for him in that way) and it seems like Jamie has only ever had surface level relationships with people who never really got her either (while also being in love w her best friend who she never thought would love her back). there’s no way this is wont eventually make at least one person cry a bunch (probably me) with how right all of it is

god Dani is so horny for Jamie sdflkdfjgkfdj preemptive RIP for Ms Taylor when Dani finally does get to live out all these daydreams on her I just know someones gonna end up pulling somethin

Does Dani like.... get that she will never love Edmund that way like is she fully aware of the fact she loves him but she’s not in love with him and all these feelings for Jamie aren’t just because it’s Jamie but because she’s not straight??? have we gone on that journey yet

aw Ed waited up for her

the book the book the book

dsfkdhfgkj oh Dani

“Jamie on her knees, looking up at her” listen-

girl u are so fucked

SIX. SIX MENTIONS OF JAMIE ON HER KNEES pls

THE DREAM

who could this possibly be about hmmmm Dani

christ

THE MEASURES SHE TAKES TO DEAL WITH THE DREAM lordt

“baffled but excited” i think is how I almost always picture eddie lol

dang get it girl take control

aw dani u poor confused little duck. i just wanna give her a hug

Dani dressed as Dorothy is awfuly cute

heh Jamie as a wolf i love her fursona

lmao toto

of course Jamie is well aquainted with the bleachers. cheeky. oh no not the art room. Dani dying inside and then imagining herself there with Jamie girl has got it baaaad u poor lil repressed gayby

Dani is... so thirsty... goddamn

lmao Jamie blatantly checking her out are u trying to kill her she already wants to rip ur clothes off

“To the third floor art room?” dfksdhfgkjdfhgjdhf imagine if this was it they just banged it out in the art room right now n got things sorted

god they go from horny to soft so quick i love the ways they care about each other

Jamie saying the scarecrow costume is fitting for Eddie PLEASE

ooh the infamous hickey

What Dani deseves: snuggles. What Dani recieves: struggles

the MEMES. god bless the memes

this was an excellent companion for my Wednesday hopefully I can churn through the rest of em before we are blessed w ch11 amen

#bhah

[idkthisisjustforfanfic]

U N P L A N N E D, part six

When you came home late from work on Tuesday afternoon, the last thing you expected to find was Harry sitting on your front step. It seemed unsafe, really. Jeff and Dave would kill him if they found out that he was just waiting, in broad daylight, by the front door of the stranger he’d knocked up. 

It was a quiet enough neighborhood. Young families and professionals lined the block and occasionally would get together for a barbeque or a summer celebration. But that didn’t mean they weren’t nosey. 

“Hi, sorry to just show up,” he stood when you got to the end of the walkway, fishing for your keys in your bag when he shoved his hands in his pockets. “I uh--Dave called, the results are in.”

You froze at that, a wave of heat brought beads of sweat to your forehead. You tried to swallow the anxiety--why should you be nervous? There was no other option.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah--s’me, obviously. He said the test was conclusive and I am definitely the father.” He let out an awkward laugh, lifted his hand to scratch the back of his neck.

You sighed, nodding for a second. You wondered if he was mad--if his heart sank when he heard it or if he suddenly wanted to disappear, flee the country and write you a fat check to leave him be.

“I knew you were telling the truth, but--it’s good. Now we don’t have to worry about that anymore.”

Or maybe not. 

“Yeah,” you plucked the house key from your ring, stepped around him to unlock the door. “That’s good. We can just move forward now.”

He nodded, stepped in behind you. He let the door swing shut, a cool reprieve from the June heat. 

“Was Dave mad?”

“No--he didn’t call you?”

“I haven’t checked,” you put your work bag down on the floor. Your phone was buried inside, you’d opted for the radio on the way home, a welcome distraction from an anxiety provoking email from Levi at the end of the day. 

Let’s have lunch tomorrow. Want to catch you up on a few things and touch base!

“He just said we should think about some logistics.” He leaned on the counter, watched as you thumbed through some mail Lexi had left out. She often got home before you from work--the sound of the shower from behind the bathroom door was a give away. 

“Logistics?”

“Yeah--some more custody stuff, more financial agreements. Living situation.”

No good mail. You tossed most of it in the garbage, let the electricity bill flutter back down to the counter. “Living situation? What about it?”

“I mean--if I’m on the road, would you come with me? How do we work out custody when I’m out of the States, that kind of thing.”

You were almost nine weeks pregnant. The conversation felt more like a topic for nine months. He could tell he’d ignited a nervousness in you, licked his lips awkwardly. You shook your head and tried to put together words. “I don’t know how we figure that out--I mean, that’s so far away and we might change our minds about how to do things once, you know, we’re actually parents.”

“Right, no, I know. Just some stuff to think about, but, it’s fine. I was just in the neighborhood and figured you’d be getting home soon. Do you want to get dinner or something?”

“It’s Tuesday.”

“It is.”

“I have take out with Glenne and Lexi every Tuesday. Unless one of us fucks something up and has to stay late at work. Which I did--but, Glenne will probably be here soon.”

He laughed at that, nodded before he shoved his hands in his pockets. “Got it. I should go, then.”

His words felt urgent--was Glenne not supposed to know he was here? Were you supposed to be keeping more things a secret than just the impending life changer growing inside of you?

For a second, you wanted him to stay. Sit on the couch and listen to you complain about Carson or Levi’s possible departure from Facebook. You’d kill to have a glass of wine and ask him all about the anxiety he felt. Ask him what it’s been like to deal with a team of professionals who devoted their entire lives to keeping your image clean, just to fuck it up after a few too many drinks. 

The doorbell rang, though, only three seconds after the water shut off. You rounded the counter to open it, he raised his eyebrows and offered Glenne a toothy grin when she stepped inside, sunglasses nearly falling off her face as she balanced the two pizzas with a six pack of beer on top. 

“Here,” you said, reaching to lighten her load. Harry stepped out of the way and she let the pizzas slide onto the counter. 

“Jesus--traffic was fucking terrible and I’m pretty sure I found three gray hairs today.”

“Well, nice to see you too, Glenney,” Harry teased, heading for the door. “I”ll catch you all later.”

He disappeared out into the front yard but waved before the door shut behind him. Glenne let out a long breath, wiped her hands on her pants before she smiked. “How’s that going?”

You let your eyelids flutter in annoyance. “It’s not going--it’s just, I don’t know. Making the best of it.”

“I heard Dave called with the results, though,” she freed a can of beer from the plastic rings and popped it open, she was never one to hesitate. “That’s good, must be a load off to know they can’t fight anything now.”

“Yeah,” you said. You went to fetch a few plates above the sink. “That’s why he came over, I guess.”

“Jeff was relieved, to be honest. He texted me earlier about it. He meant it the other day when he said he believed you. But, it’s good, now we’re all on the same page and everyone can just kind of settle in.”

“What are we settling in for?” Lexi’s towel-wrapped head poked out from the bathroom, steam floated towards the ceiling. 

Glenne smiled at the sight of her friend, an amused look on her face when Lexi tightened the towel around her chest. “Y/N having Harry’s baby.”

“It’s my baby, too,” you reminded them, opening the lid of one of the pizza boxes and looking inside. “You’re both assholes about that, honestly. Just because he’s famous we get to call it his all the time?”

“The results are in,” Glenne informed Lexi, breezing past your negative review of their language use. “Drumroll, please.”

Lexi tapped her hands on the door frame, letting out a snort of a laugh when her towel almost came loose. 

“Harry’s the father,” Glenne shouted, gaining composure when she cleared her throat. “No surprise there, little miss dry spell over here.”

You gave her the finger when you pulled a piece of pizza onto your own plate.

“You really think they both believed me before the results?”

Glenne grabbed a plate and held it up for you to give her a slice. “Harry and Jeff?” 

Lexi disappeared into her bedroom for a second, came back out with a t-shirt and shorts in hand as she tried to dress in the living room without giving any sort of a show. 

“Jeff was nervous. He just wanted a definitive either way.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Harry never questioned it, from what I can tell.”

You weren’t sure why your stomach flipped at that. The veggie topped pizza was more appetizing now than it was when Lexi texted her order to Glenne earlier than afternoon. “Not at all?”

“You don’t really give off the pathological liar vibes,” she teased, heading for the couch. “You know, this might be hard for you to believe, but--I don’t actually think he’s as much of a sex god as you think.”

“I don’t think he’s a sex god,” you pulled a face. You didn’t dare tell either of them about how many times you thought about that night. And you definitely didn’t tell them that it was the best sex you ever had. 

His lips pressed again the side of your shoulder, the duvet cool against the skin of your back. You turned your head to look at him. 

“You’re quite beautiful,” he mumbled.

“Do you say that to every girl you bring up here?”

He laughed a little, eyelashes fluttered against his cheek. “Some of them.”

“You clearly think he’s had sex with everyone in Los Angeles.”

“Not everyone,” you defended. “Just most women.”

“Well he hasn’t. I think he’s only had sex with like, six or seven girls total.”

“Ever?” You asked.

“Yes!”

“How is that possible?” Lexi asked, her eyes narrowed. 

“I don’t know--he’s always been pretty tame. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s dated casually and whatever, but, I don’t know. I don’t think he’s slept with anyone for a while either. At least not this year.”

Lexi pulled the shirt over her head and over the towel altogether. She shimmied the navy blue fabric off once she was covered. “Does Jeff know every detail of his life?”

“Probably more than he should.”

You settled onto the couch beside Glenne, picked all the olives off your pizza. “What has he said about me getting pregnant to you?”

“Harry? Or Jeff?”

“Both.”

“Harry,” Lexi corrected. “She means Harry.” You rolled your eyes. 

Glenne took a bite, looked up towards the ceiling before she wiped her mouth. “He was freaked at first--I know that. After we had dinner that night he talked to Jeff like twice a day for a good week. I know he was worried about telling his family.”

“Right.”

“But he’s been okay, actually. Jeff was more freaked out, I think, especially at first. But--Harry’s…” she trailed off, she looked over at Lexi and then brought her eyes back to you. 

“What?”

“I’m kind of surprised how much he’s made his peace with it.”

You sat with that for a second. You’d always sensed that from him, even in the beginning. A strange way of calmness about him when everything else seemed to be crashing down around you. That night on Glenne’s driveway, the stars overhead and the way he sat on the grass beside you. Still.

“Me too.” Quiet for a second. Lexi was now in the kitchen, surveying each pizza to choose the piece she wanted before she grabbed a beer and came to sit on the floor in front of you. “Am I not supposed to hang out with him?”

Glenne held her beer can in hand, she lifted her gaze to you. “Harry? No--not that I know of. Did they say something about that in the meeting or something?

You shook your head. “No--I don’t know--I just feel like Jeff doesn’t want Harry to be on my side.”

“Fuck Jeff,” Lexi laughed, biting into the slice on her plate.

Glenne ignored Lexi’s comment, took a sip and thought about it. “No. He just wants everything to work out. He doesn’t want anything to--” she trailed off again. 

“What?”

She dropped your gaze for a second, as if she was contemplating saying something she knew she shouldn’t. “Look,” she sighed. “I think Jeff’s biggest worry is that it could get messy, you know?”

“How?”

“I don’t know, I guess if either one of you develops feelings, or something. I just think Jeff wants everything to be thought out and planned and executed accordingly,” she laughed at her own words.

“Bitch you sound just like him,” Lexi laughed. 

“Bitch I don’t care,” Glenne made a face before she giggled.

Planned. Of course Jeff wanted it to be planned. You wanted everything to be planned too. You wanted everything to have a sequence, a logical order and a contingency plan, just in case. 

“That’s not going to happen, though. The feelings shit.” You took another bite of pizza, as if chewing would hinder them from asking any more questions.

Glenne smiled knowingly. “I mean--yeah, it might not. But--he’s also--”

“Cute, talented, famous,” Lexi counted off, raising her eyebrows in a suggestive way. 

“You guys--you’re acting as if I have no self control.”

“You’re pregnant with his child,” Lexi retorted. “How on earth do you get pregnant with someone’s baby and start hanging out and having dinner and not have any feelings for them--especially when it’s someone like him!”

“When you’re an independent adult who has her own life.”

She gave up. She rolled her eyes and opened her beer and let Glenne take over. “You wouldn’t be the first person, Y/N. It’s just not as simple with him, you know? A lot more at stake.”

“I get it!” You said, voice a bit more distressed now. “I know what you’re saying, you don’t have to worry.”

“How often are you seeing him, anyway? One of you said something last week at brunch about it--but, I wasn’t about to put you on trial in public.”

“How thoughtful,” Lexi ragged.

You waited. You looked around the room. The clock on the wall ticked, Glenne took a sip of beer. You looked down at Lexi, knowing that she’d never let you lie your way out of this one. “I don’t know. I’ve seen him a few times.”

Her ear met her shoulder, a hesitant smile. “Aside from the meetings and stuff?”

You nodded. Took another bite, buying yourself time. 

“And the doctors appointments?”

“We had dinner that one time at his house--that’s what he was referring to the other day.”

Now it was her turn to nod. She wanted you to say more.

“But we had dinner two other times. Casual--literally In N’ Out. But--I don’t know. He keeps saying he wants to get to know me.”

Lexi’s eyes went wide. You hadn’t divulged that yet. The two of them exchanged a look, sent some sort of telepathic message. 

“What?” You asked. “I think that’s fair--right? I’m literally having his baby.”

“I thought it was yours?” Lexi joked. 

You shot her a look. “Oh for fuck’s sake, you know what I mean.”

“I think it’s totally normal that he wants to get to know you,” Glenne supported.

You sighed, took another bite and wished you could down the entire can of beer that Glenne left on the coffee table. 

“He’s always been saying that about you.”

Lexi’s eyes got wide again. 

“What? What do you mean?”

Glenne laughed. “I don’t know--I think he kind of had a crush on you before all this started.”

You pulled your head back in surprise, looked down to meet Lexi’s gaze. She was equally shocked. “What on earth makes you think that?”

“He’s always kind of asked about you. Back in the fall he asked, then he asked again after you two hooked up. He’s been intrigued.”

“I mean, clearly,” Lexi snickered. “He put a bun in her oven.”

“Whatever. Any type of intrigue or whatever is definitely different now,” you told them.

“I think you should go for it,” Lexi shrugged. “Worst case scenario you blame it on the hormones and he still has to deal with you for another eighteen years.”

You brushed her suggestion off. It was unrealistic. You changed the subject and successfully got them to forget about the impending chaos that would ensue if the butterflies in your stomach became uncaged or set free. 

So you watched the two of them get drunk off of cheap beer--eventually option for celebratory shots in your honor, they said. You let Lexi eat all of your olives and you showed them the app you’d been using to track it. In only a few days, the baby had graduated from a pea to a cherry. They grow up so fast, you faked a few tears before bed. 

Glenne slept on the couch and was gone when you woke up in the morning. She left a note on the counter. Love you and your little cherry! 

**

At the end of the ninth week, you got the news that Levi was officially headed for Apple. Simone and Aarav insisted on a celebratory margarita even though you hadn’t been offered a promotion (yet), but you somehow managed to convince them you’d appreciate a celebratory milkshake instead. You threw it up entirely once you got home--the  nausea was getting much worse. 

But on the tenth week you rounded a corner. You woke up one morning excited for coffee. It was rare now, really, that you woke up hungry or even in the mood for a cup of coffee before you got to work.

And everything was fine. The smell of it was fine, the look of it was fine. You took a sip and swore that something was off. Then you took a bite of the buttered toast and that was off, too.

Another bite. Another sip. Something was definitely wrong.

You stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror, wondering if you’d truly gone crazy. You stuck your tongue out, moved it side to side to take a look. Nothing. 

The phone rang twice before he answered. “Hi,” he said, voice groggy and low.

“Everything tastes like pennies.”

“What?” He cleared his throat, you could hear the sheets ruffling beneath him. “Why? What do you mean?”

“I mean everything tastes like pennies.”

“Everything?”

“Yes, everything,” you looked at your watch. 8:21am. He was definitely out cold, and now, instead, he was dealing with what may or may not be a pregnancy induced delusion. “Sorry--I know it’s early. I just don’t have anyone else to panic with.”

“Where’s Lexi? Are you home alone?”

“She’s on set already. She’s sick of hearing me complain about symptoms anyway. And I guess,” you let the real reason slip out, “I haven’t talked to you in a few days.”

He laughed a little. A quiet one, an early morning, half-asleep laugh. You wondered what he looked like when he first woke up. You shook your head--what a stupid thought. 

“I know, love--you’re the one who’s been too busy to see me. What are you doing after work tonight?”

“I dunno, probably googling what the fuck is wrong with me.”

“Don’t think anything’s wrong with you. I can call Dr. Weston, though, if you want.”

“No,” you said. You refused to let him do anything boyfriendy, that felt too weird. “It’s fine. I’ll just google it.”

But you didn’t have the chance. By the time you hung up and got yourself put together enough to head for the office, a link came across your phone, a message from Harry. 

Harry (8:31am): Link: Metallic Taste in Mouth during Pregnancy (Dysgeusia) - whattoexpect.com

You smiled at the text. A flush on your cheeks and a somersault in your belly. Not the kind reserved for a friendly interaction or a nice message from a coworker. No--this was the type of stupid cheesy grinning that you did at the computer screen when you were thirteen and instant messaging boys far past your bedtime. 

You clicked your phone shut and got settled at work. But he was definitely hard to ignore. 

Harry (9:04am): Just read more about it. They say it happens in the first trimester so that’s probably what it is, right? 

Harry (9:05am): I mean, you didn’t bite your tongue, right? It’s not blood? Does it taste like blood at all? This other article is saying some people taste blood.

Y/N L/N (9:07am): Yeah it’s like metal. That’s probably it! If it doesn’t go away I’ll call Dr. Weston.

Harry (9:08am): Okay, let me know. Do you want to come to mine for dinner tonight?

You stared at the message. Glenne’s words echoed in your head. Maybe you shouldn’t have even called him this morning. Maybe you were overreacting about not hearing from him and maybe you were losing it altogether. 

But it had been four days. He’d texted you the day after you saw him, after Glenne and Lexi had lectured you about everything under the sun. He asked how work was and you filled him in over text about your coffee with Levi. You still had almost six weeks before Levi left Facebook altogether, still no mention of if you were going to get the promotion or not. 

So maybe it was that. Maybe you were just stressed about work and the nausea was getting to your head. Maybe that was why you said yes. 

And the fact that he was excited to see you only made it worse. He had music playing and dinner already cooking when you walked through the door that evening. He’d already texted you to tell you the code for the gate, just come on in, he said. I’ll be here.

He had a dish towel over his shoulder, a smile on his face as you sat and watched him cook. He promised this meal would be better, a new one he’d just seen online and wanted to give it a go. 

Aren’t you too busy to learn new recipes? You teased. Musician, actor, and chef?

When it was almost ready, though, he paused. “Can I actually show you something?” 

You sipped at the water he’d handed you, watched as he put the spatula down and headed for the living room. “I’m not a fan of surprises, to be honest.”

“Noted,” he said--but he didn’t really seem to be listening. Instead, he reached for something on the coffee table. Fabric, of some sort. 

He brought it back over and put it down in front of you. It was white, tiny yellow ducks in a row. It was rolled up, but when you pulled the string and flattened it out, he spoke. “S’a onesie. I saw it out at some store--not a big deal. Just thought it was cute.”

There weren’t tears this time, which would have been almost expected. Instead, a warmth in your belly and a fire beneath your ribs. You smiled up at him. “It’s adorable.”

“Figured she’ll look good in it.”

“Or he--yellow,” you laughed. “Very gender neutral of you.”

One day there’d be a baby inside of it. Ten fingers, ten toes, eyes and a nose and a mouth that cried for both of you. He avoided your gaze for a second, you folded the onesie back up and let out a breath when he went back to the stove. “Are you scared at all?”

He laughed a little, bit on his lip and smiled as he stirred the contents of the dish. “Terrified.”

“Really? You’ve been so--calm, this whole time.”

He shrugged, turned the burner on low and rested his elbows on the counter. “I think I didn’t want to freak you out. I could tell from the start that you were losing it, really. Going quite mental,” he laughed. “I just wanted to be there for you.”

“Well...I appreciate it,” you said. “I’ve needed that.”

He nodded, the sun was setting behind you, casting a glow to the living room. He didn't say anything when he walked around the counter and let his arms drape over your shoulders, pulling your face into his chest. He didn’t say anything when he kissed the top of your head and then let go, an electric current coursing through your limbs. 

“She’s a cherry now.”

He went back to the stove and nodded. “I know,” he said. “I got the same app.”

More butterflies at that. He was paying attention? He cared? He was also tracking the growth of your little fruit on an app with pictures and daily notifications? 

You bit at your lip. “Soon she’ll be a pear.”

“One day she’ll be a cantaloupe.”

You faked a look of fear. “That’ll be tough.”

“I think you’ll be alright.” Quiet for a second, then he corrected himself. “We’ll be alright.”

**

Lexi begged you to come. She’d been telling you about it for a good two weeks leading up, but it didn’t make you want to go any more. 

Glenne loved you, you knew that. It wasn’t a question of if she wanted you there or not, or if Lexi wanted you there. It was more a question of if Jeff wanted you around and if Harry wanted you around and you didn’t feel like finding out, especially not when the size of your belly had slowly increased, but not enough to make you look anything other than bloated. 

So a bathing suit was a no go. There were too many people who didn’t even know about this. Jeff’s friend Zack and his girlfriend Mira. Glenne’s younger sister Heidi and her favorite coworker Nicki. 

So you’d planned to spend the Fourth of July alone on your couch with some ice pops. You were more than happy to watch the fireworks on TV and get an early night of sleep, only interrupted by a drunk Lexi stumbling in at 2am. 

But apparently, Harry wouldn’t have it that way. 

“I’m freezing,” you said, reaching forward to push the vent away from you, he took a left turn into Jeff and Glenne’s neighborhood. 

“You were hot three seconds ago,” he said with a smirk, turning the knob to lessen air in the car. 

“I’m pregnant,” you said, turning to look at him quickly. “And it’s your fault,” you joked.

“You know, for someone who said she wouldn’t hold that against me, you’ve done a lot of holding that against me.”

You tried to fight the smile but couldn’t. He’d shown up unannounced. At first he said he just wanted ice cream. There’s nowhere good near my house. All the good places are near yours. 

But when he told you to pack a bathing suit and a change of clothes, you figured a dingy Dairy Queen down the street wasn’t the actual destination. You already told him why you didn’t want to go when he invited you a week ago. 

I won’t really know anyone there. I’ll have to pretend I don’t know you. Jeff seems annoyed by my existence and I don’t feel like pissing him off more than I already have. 

He swore you were wrong. He promised that Jeff wasn’t mad and that you’d know plenty of people and he swore that no one there would even notice if you spent the entire night glued to his side. He made it sound like that was an option and you tried not to blush.

And that made you remember it again: his world was different than yours. Of course Glenne and Jeff were friends with people who weren’t star struck by celebrities. Glenne’s beautiful friends from work and her gorgeous younger sister were probably grabbing coffee with guys like Zac Efron on the reg. 

But that didn’t stop the nerves from going haywire inside of you when Harry led you around the back. Lexi was already there, red solo cup tilted towards the sky when you both walked up behind her. 

“Look who decided to come out,” she teased, letting an arm drape over your shoulders. “Love you, mean it!”

You laughed, thankful for the sunglasses that let you scan the crowd. Jeff’s brother, check. You met him last year. Another guy from Jeff’s office, check, he definitely looked familiar. Glenne’s sister, her coworker, another girl that Lexi had definitely introduced you to at some point. So far, so good.

Glenne appeared behind you, already tipsy and in a crop top. “Hi lovie,” she smiled, wrapping her arms around you. “How ya doin’?”

“Good,” you said, thankful for a second away from Harry. He was already distracted, he offered a handshake to a guy who you swore was at that dinner last fall. “Hoping he forgets all about the bet today, to be honest.”

“Oh shit,” Lexi said, nodding. “I totally fucking forgot. He’s gonna get wasted, no doubt.”

You laughed a little, ignoring the jealousy that washed through you. You weren’t a huge drinker, a rosé or bubbly type of girl, if anything. Tequila was nice and vodka had it’s moments. But at this point, you’d kill for a sip of a cold mixed drink. Hell, at this point, you might even take a tiny hit of Lexi’s miracle weed--her words, not yours.

With the stress of work and Harry and life in general, you felt desperate. So a Fourth of July party seemed like the perfect place to remember why people use protection. 

Glenne lowered her voice, let her elbow knock into your side when she looked over at Harry. “Pretty scandalous to show up here together, no?”

“What? Why?” You tried to downplay it. “I didn’t even want to come, which I made very clear to all of you.”

“Hey, things are going well in paradise, okay? Leave the girl alone,” Lexi told her. 

“No one is in Paradise. We’re in Laurel Canyon.”

“Sure,” Glenne smirked. 

“Alright--not hanging out with you two,” you offered a sarcastic grin and walked away, sidling right up to Harry when he turned to see you.

“Matt, this is,” a pause, a look on his face like he didn’t know what to call you. “My friend--Y/N, this is Matt, he used to work with Jeff.”

“Nice to meet you,” you stuck a hand out, offered him a smile when he lifted his sunglasses to let you get a good look at his face.

“I don’t think we’ve met before,” he said, a hawaiian shirt was unbuttoned down the middle of his chest. 

“No, probably not,” you said over the music. “I don’t come around here much.”

“Y/N--do you want to go get a drink inside?”

You looked over to Harry, a bit surprised by his sudden desire. He forced a smile down at you, his eyes hoping to communicate something--but you couldn’t tell what. You followed him inside after offering an apologetic smile and a see you later, to Matt.

He tugged you towards the kitchen once you stepped through the sliding doors to the interior of the house. 

“Let’s not like--y’know--pick up guys here.”

“What?”

“S’just awkward, alright?”

“What are you talking about?”

“He was into you!”

“He was?” You looked over his shoulder, watched as Matt laughed at something Glenne said to Heidi. “How do you know?” You were flattered--after waking up and feeling like your stomach had puffed out a bit too far, it was nice to know that you still had some type of sex appeal.

Being pregnant didn’t feel sexy so far. 

“How do I know? He was obvious!”

“Are you jealous?” The words fell out of your mouth innocently, curiously. A wave of embarrassment at first. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked. 

His eyebrows furrowed together, he pulled his chin away from you, rolled his eyes. “No, I just--I don’t know. That’d be weird.”

“All of this is weird,” you reminded. 

“Yeah, well, we don’t have to add to it.”

You ignored the way he turned around, looked at Matt again and then turned back to you. “I’m gonna get--nevermind.”

“Get what?”

“Nothing.”

You smirked. “A drink?”

“No.”

“Bullshit.”

“I was gonna say that but I forgot. It’s fine.” He walked over to the counter, ignored all of the bottles of liquor and reached for a solo cup.

“You don’t have to do this.”

He shoved it under the tap and turned on the faucet. “It’s like Sober September, but--for longer.”

“Is that a thing?”

He shrugged, took a sip. “I think so.” Quiet for a second, you scanned the room again for anyone you knew. 

“Does weed count?”

“Yes it counts,” you looked at him like he was crazy. Anything I can’t you can’t do either. Drugs, drinks, that’s the same thing.”

He sighed, bit at his lower lip before his mouth curved into a smile. “You’re lucky I like you.”

You didn’t want to tell him, but you knew you were.

table of contents | talk to me + join the tag list

author’s note: you have no idea how hard it is to give you this chapter and NOT chapter seven yet. Big things are coming, folks. Come chat it up with me cause *disclaimer* i’m gonna have some wine tonight so it’ll be a good time. 

tag list: @stepping-into-the-light @thurhomish @afterstylesmadeit @iconicharry @stylesfics-xx @harryspirate @mellamolayla @harryinsweatersandbandanas @stylesfantasy @clorenafila @mell-love @anssu-amry @yelllowgrass @littlesoldierelleora @styles217 @rachkon @c-h-e-r-r-y-y @myhat  @rosegoldbel @passionate-dreamerr @grammyforstyles @haute-romance-quotidienne@dontgiveupthedayjob @ursamajor603 @craic-head-horan @heavenspidey @talk-british-2-me-britbritharry @blackxxmagicc @winter-soldier-007 @ssllbb @wanderlustiing @jdcharliewhiskey  @caritocp @kaybee87 @wildbeee @hsunflowervol @harrys-medicines @tobe-sogolden @theresnooneheretosave @1d-tommo5 @soullikestyles @mrsfstyles  @you-youneverdo @fstopsteph @cock-a-doodely-doo @hinaesthethicc @s-u-t @mleestiles @rubytersteege @heartsandwheels @rainbowparadiseharry @ainatirb-j 

#harry styles story #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fiction #harry styles fan fiction #harry styles fan fic #harry styles imagine #harry styles reader insert #fem!reader x harry styles #harry styles x fem reader #harry styles x female reader #one direction fanfic #1dff #harry styles blurbs #harry styles smut #harry styles one shot #dad!harry

[oopsiedoopsie23]

The princess and the drummer | Rook x reader

A/N: Soooo I sort of drifted away from the prompt but I actually liked how this turned out so forgive me my loves. Also, wouldn’t mind doing a part 2 to this so let me know if ya want one <3

Prompt: Rumours spiral when the reader, a famous pop star, is spotted getting drum lessons from a certain drummer ;)

“I really don’t think it’s a good idea Y/N, you have press starting soon for your album and we really need to control what the press is saying about you before then, being there will do nothing but hurt your image right now.”

“Mhm...mhm...”

“Y/N are you even listening to me? I’m trying to save your image, you know?”

You sighed as you took another sip of your beer before putting your phone back to your ear.

“Look, all I’m doing is hanging out with my friends before their concert tonight, it’s fine, I don’t see how that could possibly end my career.”

“I’m not saying that this will end your career...”

“Perfect! So if it doesn’t end my career then I don’t give a shit.”

You end the phone call before quickly downing the rest of your beer.

“Damn girl who the fuck did you just kill?”

You turn around and see none other than your best friend himself, MGK, in what you like to call his prime element, joint in one hand, microphone in the other, wearing expensive clothes that he was definitely gonna strip off 5 minutes into his concert.

“What makes you think that I killed anybody?” you smirked as you took the joint out of his hand. “The fact that you just downed that beer and sounded like you wanted to shoot whoever you were on the phone with, in the balls.”

You laughed, almost choking on the smoke coming out of your lungs as you hand the joint back to him. “Trust me, I wanted to do a lot worse to that fucking idiot.” You roll your eyes, “My manager says that they’re the best publicist in this stupid ass industry, but they seem more like a fucking babysitter with a stick up their ass, to me.”

This time it was Colson’s turn to laugh. “C’mon dude forget that shit, you can keep us company during sound check.”

You nodded, accepting his invitation, following your best friend through the  venue’s small hallways and staircases leading to the stage.

“Damn Col, this is a dope ass venue.” you whistled, the venue was definitely smaller than you were used to but with all of the lights and screens set up, it created an atmosphere that felt almost euphoric.

“I know, it might not be one of the arenas that you perform at but this is something else.”

You turn around, ready to smack Colson for his slight dig at you when you hear another voice interrupt you,

“Hey sweetheart, heard you were about to kill someone over the phone earlier!”

“Rook...always the gentleman.” you smile as you take the beer from his hands.

The two of you stand in silence for a bit, admiring the venue and each taking small sips of your beers.

“Do you know how to play the drums?”

You almost spit out your mouthful of beer as you begin laughing.

Rook can’t help but join in as he watches you fall to the ground, clutching your stomach from laughing so hard. “What? You seem like the type of girl to kill someone in their sleep so you must play the drums at least a little bit.”

“I sing fucking pop music Rook, and what is it with everyone calling me a murderer today?”

“In my defence, your music gives off more of a ‘sweet but psycho’ vibe and not much of a ‘pop princess’ vibe.”

You watch as the drummer smiles wide, as if he’s about to laugh at his own joke, before stretching his hand outward slightly, like he’s offering you to take it.

“C’mon even pop stars can learn how to play the drums.”

You blush slightly as you take his hand, allowing him to lead you up another set of stairs that led to the drum set.

“So...this is my home.” you giggle as Rook picks up one of his drumsticks using it to point to each part of the drum, explaining what they do, you were so entranced by him and his passion for the instrument that it takes you a few minutes to notice that he was still gently holding onto your hand.

It isn’t until he leaves to grab more beer that he lets go of your hand. You can’t help but feel as if your hands miss the warmth and gentleness of his as you’re sitting in his seat holding his drumsticks, awaiting his return.

“Y’all motherfuckers need to get a room.”

You spin in the seat, glaring at your best friend who was leaning against the wall, seemingly watching you.

“First of all, you look creepy as fuck, second, you know that we’re just friends.”

Colson smirks at you before taking a sip of whatever poison he was drinking, “Then why were the two of you holding hands the whole time?”

You blush as you realize that you weren’t the only one that had noticed.

“Hey I got one for you too, in case you wanted one.” 

Rook carefully sets the beers on the ground before turning to you.

“What are you smiling about?”

“The fact that after this lesson, I’m gonna give you a run for your money.”

Rook laughs and you can’t help but feel your heart skip a beat as you see how wholesome his smile is.

“Okay then, let’s see what the pop princess can do on the drums.” 

“I thought that I was more of a psycho than a princess?” you smirked

“Well it depends on how much you give me a run for my money, princess.”

You swear that you almost fall off of the chair at the nickname. Rook notices your slight surprise and takes the opportunity to stand behind you and wrap his arms around your shoulders so that he was able to put his hands around yours on the drumsticks.

Your breath hitches as you move your head up so that you were looking back into his eyes. 

You watch as his eyes slowly scan down your body, from your eyes to your lips, to your cleavage that you knew you were giving him a better view of, from your positions. You smirk as you take advantage of his surprise to grab the sides of his face, pulling him downwards so that both of your lips collided. 

You felt electricity go throughout your body. It was as if you could feel a spark buzzing throughout your body travelling from your lips to your feet. You felt his hands slightly graze over your hips and you try your hardest to hold back a moan.

“Hey Rook, if you’re done tongue fucking my friend can we do our sound check now?”

The two of you stop kissing and look down to see Colson smiling at the two of you, phone in hand, with a glint of mischief in his eyes.

You were on such a high from your make out session with Rook that it took you a second to realize that Colson was filming the two of you. Rook immediately noticed you tense up and put his hand on the small of your back, trying to calm you down.

“Kells are you filming this shit?”

“Hell yeah dude, I’m live right now, I want to make sure that we have a video of this so we can play this shit at your fucking wedding!”

You groan and put your head in your hands, knowing that Colson’s video of you and Rook was definitely going to cause an onslaught of articles written about the two of you. And just as you were about to reach for your beer, as if it was clockwork, your phone began buzzing like crazy.

You sighed looking back up at Rook, who was still looking down at you, watching you with worried eyes, with his hand on your back.

“It’s all over the websites isn’t it?”

“You bet your ass it is! What in God’s name were you thinking? You’re a pop star for fuck’s sake not some groupie! I told you that you should’ve just stayed home! I knew that you were gonna do something to mess all of our hard work up!”

You didn’t know if it was the fact that you were 2 or 3 beers in, or if it was the fact that you still felt a buzz of electricity coursing through your veins but you had enough of this bullshit publicist and were ready to actually put them through a fucking grave like everyone thought you would.

You stood up, grabbing your beer, holding your finger up to Rook, signalling for him to give you a minute before walking away slightly so that you were behind a wall, safe from prying eyes and Colson’s drunk livestream.

“Listen up you little shit, I’m sick and tired of you thinking that I will do whatever the fuck that you say, and treating me like I’m some precious pop star. When you said ‘our’ hard work I think that you misspoke because the only work that’s been done is me working my ass off, making music that I don’t even like and pretending to be someone that I’m not!”

“So what are you saying?”

“I’m saying that from now on, I’m gonna do the shit that I want, not giving a fuck about what the press will say in the stupid fucking interviews and...you’re fired.”

“Wha-”

“Tell my manager to find me a better fucking publicist.”

You end the call, before leaning against the wall, trying to catch your breath.

“Should I call the police to report a murder?”

You look to your side and see Rook looking at you with worried eyes.

“I think that I might have to throw away my phone to get rid of the evidence.” 

Rook chuckles before stepping in front of you and taking both of your hands in his. “You know, we never really got to finish our drum lessons.”

“So does that make me a psycho or a princess?”

“I don’t know I haven’t decided yet...I think that we need to finish where we left off first, to help me make a decision.”

You roll your eyes as the two of you connect lips once again, reigniting the sparks that were flying.

“You do know that all of the fucking websites are going to be saying that you were making out with some mystery drummer right?”

You can’t help but burst out laughing, as you wrap your arms around his neck,

“The princess and the drummer...I like the sound of that.”

-----------------

Let me know if you want a part 2 my loves :)

#rook #jp cappelletty #jp cappelletty x reader #rook x reader #rook imagine #jp cappelletty imagine #xx #est #mgk #machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly imagine #machine gun kelly x reader #colson baker #colson baker x reader #colson baker imagine #imagine #fanfiction #oopsiedoopsie23

[exciting]

As requested, books / series I read in 2020 in the order I read them, with a few brief thoughts. (This took me a hot second because there are a few and also I moved cities) Should I keep a consistent goodreads? Yes I should but I didn’t think of that at the time, so bone apple teeth & sorry if I offend you abt your faves x

P.S. I can’t figure out how to do a read more on mobile so long post ahead!

A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas - This is one of the most vivid published fantasy books I have ever read... I read it twice in rapid succession. The fandom POPS off. I must say I have issues with certain aspects e.g. fae lore completely ignored à la Twilight, all love interests 500+ years old and technically a different species, etc (I’m not going to deconstruct the entire series here but just know that I could... Nesta deserves better)

Cruel Prince by Holly Black - This fucking slaps, HB clearly has done her research, the lore is near immaculate, and it explores the Fae in such a unique way, tying it to the modern world subtly and seamlessly. My only qualm was that the books felt quite short; truly wish there had been more content.

Throne of Glass by Sarah J Maas (6/7) - So basically I read this in one single, hyperfixated fit which meant I literally locked myself in my room for three days straight and read all six books back to back in a row from morning to the wee hours. Which is not to say it was spectacular; although it was a VERY rich world, sometimes it was too much... this felt like 6 stories in one. Ik she was young when she wrote this but it is my humble opinion that SJM needs a better editor & I personally think Rowan is a grade A asshole / straight up abusive (& personally think the ACOTAR Tamlin plot was born from that?). It’s good but not as good as ACOTAR. Skip-read the last book. 

Grishaverse (Shadow and Bone) by Leigh Bardugo (3) - This is essential to read before SOC but was very much simply a YA fantasy book, although the world was cool and the way the love plot played out was, imo, a subtle middle finger to the fantasy trope. Felt very much aimed at younger readers though? Really liked the sandwhich structure of the Proluge and Epilogue, especially in #2

Six of Crows series by Leigh Bardugo (2) - INCREDIBLE continuation of Grishaverse, better than the original series by a mile. It has the range, the diversity, the representation (the male lead is a disabled asexual and still the most cunning of the entire cast of characters), the plot is phenomenal, and it manages such a well rounded plot in only two books which means nothing is stretched out or squeezed in more than need be. Deserves all the praise it gets.

King of Scars series by Leigh Bardugo (0.5/1) - Personally I don’t consider this book canon, and while it’s nice to see the rest of Nina’s journey & the world again & everyone else, I don't like it. I will, however, be reading book 2 when it comes out, so shame on me, I suppose.

Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo (1/1) - this was incredibly cool although it went off in a completely different direction than I thought it would based off the first few chapters? One of my favourite YA-author-debuts-New-Adult novels in 2020 though!

Crescent City by Sarah J Maas (1/1) - This was supposed to be SJM/s New Adult debut, although personally I would put her other series in New Adult, and I can’t say a remarkable amount was different with this except they said “fuck” and “ass” a lot. WHY is the romantic interest 500 years old AGAIN. I just... don’t... I just don’t think it was necessary... the world was cool though, and the last half of the book was riveting, but the beginning was quite slow and I thought the sword thing was predictable. I am interested to see where this goes though.

A Darker Shade of Magic by V.E. Schwab (3) - This world is so fucking cool... four Londons aka parallel universes & the one in ‘our’ world is set in industrial era London. Magic, girls dressing up as boys, thieves, pirates, royalty... it all just slaps. Schwab is an incredible writer & I was completely immersed.

Midnight Sun by SMeyer - I didn’t think anything could possibly detract even further from the Twilight story but I was sorely mistaken... seeing the stalking from Edward’s POV - and it was worse than depicted in Twilight, for the record - completely obliterated any sort of romance the first half of the original book may have portrayed. I still hold the opinion that the entire series would have been better if some kind of vampire lore had been abided by, if only to see all of the villains thwarted by someone dropping a bag of rice on the ground, forcing them to have to count them all.

An ember in the Ash by Sabaa Tahir  (3/4) - This was just a very stereotypical ya fantasy series, emphasis on the YOUNG... it wasn’t anything to write home about but I remember quite enjoying it at the time. 

The Power by Naomi Alderman - This book is FUCKING incredible and EXCEPTIONALLY thought provoking... essentially women alone develop a power of electric shock etc. and then take over the world from men, and it explores feminism and the balance between equality & tipping the scales in the other direction. Written by a friend of M.Atwood in a similar tone to handmaids tale, I would say? Content warning; there are some exceptionally graphic scenes in the latter half of the novel. 

Hamlet by Wllm Shksp - I can’t believe it took me this long to finally read it but Ophelia is my favourite name in the entire world & we love to see a woman go batshit (although she didn’t deserve that). 

Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas - this was unsettling in the best sense of the word... it was a little slow & honestly more of a concept than a big reveal, but I couldn’t stop thinking about it after I finished it? A Secret History vibes but make it blurry like the memory of all those dystopian novels you read when you were young?

The Invisible Life of Addie La Rue by V.E. Schwab - This is without a doubt my book of the year, and probably the best book I read in 2020? I stayed up all night on a friend’s couch reading it, got a book hangover and reread the ending, and then thrust it upon my mother who doesn’t usually read but read this, and loved it just as much. HIGHLY recommend and you HAVE to read it, it’s beautiful and endearing and just plain wonderful.

Captive Prince by C.S. Pacat (3/3) - I went into this knowing it was going to be terrible, because I had received a blow by blow telling me as much; although I must say that it did learn a remarkable amount of new words, the books did get better as the series went on, and it did have a rather charming ending? BIG content warning for almost everything.

Sapiens by Yuval Harari - mind-expanding & must recommend for everyone, there is everything in this and I daresay everyone should posses this kind of knowledge? I listened to it as an audiobook (which I recommend because it’s rather hearty) but will be buying this in hardcopy & rereading it with annotations. 

Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller - Without a doubt, one of the most beautiful novels I have ever read, and certainly the most beautiful portrayal of the story of Achilles and the battle of Troy I have ever seen. Patroclus deserved the justice that was given to him in this book; indeed, all of the characters were written with justice and grace. Highly recommend.

Trials of Apollo by Rick Riordan (3/5) - Apollo is my favourite Greek God, and the sexiest greek god, and Rick Riordan’s writing slaps, as always. It did pain me to see Apollo, the sexy immortal, have to be forced back into a 16 year old’s body but everything else? Whimsical & wonderful, as expected. 

These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong - a retelling of Romeo and Juliette, except it’s set in Shanghai in the 1920′s, and the protagonists already have a history. Very well done, characters are incredibly diverse in race, sexual orientation, gender, and ability / disability (and honestly, representation has never appeared so effortless and elegant). Also it includes a monster and possible magic. Incredibly underrated and highly recommend.

The Once and Future Witches by Alix. E Harrow - this was such a unique concept, and truly captivating, the story was charming, and felt like the kind of beautiful fairytale you would read as children but with more grit? ABSOLUTELY recommend this one

The Pisces by Melissa Broder - I hated this so much, not my vibe at all. Mermaid smut x therapy but make it cynical and judgemental (I know there was a moral in there but that’s not my point) also the dog dies.

Library of the Unwritten by A.J. Hackwith (1/2) - really interesting & unique concept (all unwritten novels / ideas reside in a special library that is part of Hell and then sometimes the books can come to life) however, my first thought upon reading this was “this reads as if it’s stemmed from one of those writing prompt tumblr posts” bc of the tone and whatever and as it turns out I was somewhat correct, it did stem from a short story (not bad just obvious). It did kind of settle down as it went on but I found reading it kind of a drag, and I don’t think I will read the second one.

Abandon by Meg Cabot - 1. Meg Cabot’s writing always fucking slaps 2. Hades and Persephone but make it modern & very 2000′s & somehow kind of unique 3. I literally loved this, sue me

Medusa Girls (Sweet Venom) by Tera Childs - Like Percy Jackson except they are descendants of Medusa so they are Gorgons and have fangs & venom (hence the title). Gave me very 2000′s vibes? Quite cool but tbh I found the books quite short (like two hours each, if that)? Do NOT read the GoodReads description of the book before you read it, you will spoil it for yourself.

Bring me their Hearts by Sara Wolf - In my opinion, this is one of the most underrated YA series I read in 2020. The heroine is endearing, self aware, witty, and loves to look pretty even while kicking ass which in my opinion is an incredibly underrated trait. Also, immortality without being hundreds of years old? VERY sexy. HIGHLY recommend. 

A Deal with the Elf King by Elise Kova - High commendation to be given for the fact that it is a standalone and yet manages to fit in the plot of what would usually be a full fantasy trilogy without cutting corners or being a million miles long? Also sweet storyline & beautiful ending? If you liked ACOTAR you should read this as a “what would have / could have been had SJM had a different editor” (No shade I promise).

The Iron Fae by Julie Kagawa (4/4 + novellas) - Incredibly detailed faerie set around the modern world & our current use of technology & iron in it. Very neat adventure-style series, by the time I read the last novella I was well and truly done with the world (aka provided enough content to be fulfilling). Was definitely aimed at a younger audience though, NO smut / smut was brushed over.

The Modern Faerie Tales by Holly Black (3/3 SS) - This is technically the prequel to Cruel prince, set in the modern world, but with the fae world inside it as it traditional? All I have to say is that it is excellent & I highly recommend it.

Bridgerton series (The Duke and I) by Julia Quinn (9/9) - I read this after watching the Netflix show twice through and I am obsessed, although the books were not quite as elegant as the show, and some parts that made me cringe either by their portrayal (it is very firmly set in the 19th century and thus some things are not handled with tact or grace), the characters were exceptionally loveable and I am so excited to see where the show takes them! Lovely language & an abundance of words I had never seen before (always a plus). 

#the number of these which I hate with a passion now #fuck my life #HATE SJM #MAD about grishaverse #ASHAMED of bridgerton and the feminism leeched from my soul after reading this

[swamplatibule]

Steel and Smoke part two because fuck yeahhhh

Alright so last time the place we stopped was Fang showed Clover her face and then Nico crashed his ship into the Sparrow (Fang’s ship) because he doesn’t know how to pilot. Yeah.

Once again, putting it under ✨the cut✨ because it’s gonna be long

Okay so Nico just crashes into the ship, nothing breaks, don’t worry, but there’s definitely a significant dent in the side of the Sparrow now. Fang and Clover run up to the cockpit, both to check out what hit them and to possibly start a chase if need be.

And need does be.

See, the ship Nico took happens to be a pretty intimidating ship. This thing is pretty sleek and small and it’s completely decked out with weapons, and even though he doesn’t know how to use them, they definitely unnerve Fang. She can’t say she likes being shot at.

So the Sparrow starts zooming away at full speed. Fang is an excellent pilot, she knows how everything works and what it’s called, but she has a habit of assuming that everyone else does too. She sees this ship that looks like its probably trying to attack her, and she assumes that the person flying it must be a badass pilot. Ships like that aren’t a easy to fly. So she uses every maneuver she knows to get the hell out of there.

Nico is having a very hard time keeping up, because as I am going to mention a million times, he’s not a good pilot. He has trouble just flying in a straight line. So when Fang skirts around a fairly obvious dead zone, he flies right into it.

Now, children, Xelian dead zones are DANGEROUS. They‘re large blobs of space that have a purple glow surrounding them, and flying into them will completely decimate a ship and probably kill anyone inside. It‘s ridiculously hot in there. You get exposed to that heat, you’re dead. Problem is, there’s also a heavy amount of pressure that will very slowly crunch up almost anything like a soda can. Plus, going in there completely shuts down all of the electricity on a ship, so you can’t just fly out.

So, in short, Nico is very much not in a good spot right now.

Clover can see him through the windshield of his ship, since the dead zone shut off whatever thing was making it mirrored, and she realizes- That‘s. That’s just some kid. Fang is already going to help, because as mentioned before, she’s a thief, not a killer. She has relatively okay morals as of yet. Of course, how the hell do you get someone out of a dead zone?

I don’t actually fully know. Y’all ever get those chunks of your daydreams where it just kinda skips something and then continues? Yeah.

So they get Nico out of the deadzone somehow, leaving his ship behind because by that point, this thing is so scrunched up and broken that there’s no way to salvage it. He, like Clover, is absolutely panicked about being on the Songbird’s ship, but he also just needs a moment because he almost died and he’s shooketh.

It should be noted that Fang has not put her helmet back on. She just kinda forgot.

Nico, who has recovered a bit from the shock, is now less panicky but extremely confused. The Silver Songbird, literal scourge of Xeliah, most infamous, wanted criminal in the system, is some fifteen year old who can’t seem to stop making sarcastic remarks to the random girl with her that Nico vaugely remembers as that spellcaster on the news.

[Clover keeps asking him if he’s okay, is he hurt, etc., and Fang has suddenly started being the most sarcastic person ever because that‘s what she does when she’s in tense situations.]

There’s definitely a bit of relief when Nico starts answering her questions, because oh thank the gods he’s not brain damaged. Fang helps Clover get him to the Sparrow’s ‘Infirmary’, which is really just a smallish room with somewhere to sit down and a few cabinets of first aid supplies and such. Then she goes up to the cockpit, because someone needs to be flying the ship and also because she really doesn't feel like dealing with this right now, it‘s been a fucking DAY for her.

So Nico and Clover are alone, with Clover bandaging his hand because he hurt it and Nico technically knows how first aid works but he’s never done it on himself before so now probably ain’t the best time to start, y’know?

They’re just vibing in there, with Clover explaining what she knows has happened so far (although neither of them are still certain whether or not Fang tried to kill Nico’s mom) and them having a conversation and stuff, when Fang comes in.

Nico stands up, very immediately on guard, and starts demanding some answers about the assassination attempt. It’s at this moment that Fang and Clover realize that this is May Eternity’s fucking son. They just technically kidnapped the son of an important political figure. Oh shit.

We‘ll ignore that for a second, however, because Fang is not the type to quietly let someone yell at her or order her around, so it quickly becomes a rather loud argument between them. Clover has to break it up, one because they’re fighting and that‘s not good, and two because something is coming towards them very fast and maybe that‘s a thing that they to avoid.

It is most definitely a thing they need to avoid.

You see, there are very few creatures that can survive in a dead zone. One of which being a lovely little critter known as a Caliszon Serpent. Its basically a really big snake, godzilla snek, that floats around and doesn't need to breathe and just so happens to consider passing ships a wonderful snack. We’re gonna call this one Fred. And Fred just spotted them.

Fang gets to the controls in time to avoid Fred’s first lunge, but here’s the thing about Caliszon Serpents - They’re fast. When you’ve just been floating around space for a while, you learn how to zoom. And zoom Fred does.

Yeah, you thought that the Nico-Sparrow space chase was the only one for today? Now you’ve got three kids in a ship, only one of which knows how to pilot anything, trying to avoid Super Danger Noodle.

How lovely.

#Paracosm: Steel and Smoke #Para: Fang #Para: Nico #Para: Clover #tw guns #tw fighting #tw violence #tw death mention #Paraportal #my paras #my paracosm #honestly I could ramble on forever about this

[bleepblopbloop56]

Discovering the Soul

Okay guys heres the deal i mightve already posted this forever ago but i cant find it and im pretty sure it only got like 2 likes so were trying this again.

Warnings: panic attack, crying, soulmate au

---

Virgil didn’t have a soulmate. Not really a surprise. A lot of people didn’t have soulmates, it was fairly common actually. Only about 75% of the population actually HAD the black stains on their skin, showing the first place their soulmate would touch them. Some people never find their soulmates, and that was fine. People still continued dating and getting married, even with people they knew weren’t their soulmate. Sometimes soulmates just didn’t exist, and that was okay.

What wasn’t okay was the stigma around not having a soulmate. In schools kids were often bullied for not having one, leading to higher risk of mental health problems in people without them.

The way that soulmarks work is simple. From the moment you’re born a black stain appears on your skin, the first time that your soulmate touches you will be in that place and  you’ll know because the mark bursts into color. Most people had them on their hands, signifying a handshake, an accidental brushing of hands, a slap in some cases.

His friend Logan had one covering most of his back. His friend Roman had the usual hand one, covering the bottom an some of the top half of his fingers. Dee had one looking suspiciously like a bitch slap... Perhaps the soulmark shaped the person. Maybe if Dee had a different soulmark he wouldn’t act like such an ass all the time, practically begging to be slapped by someone. Maybe Logan wouldn’t be so observant if he wasn’t always sitting with his back towards the wall, watching the place, because he didn’t WANT a soulmate. Maybe if Virgil had a soulmark he’d be happy. Maybe he wouldn’t cover up every inch of his skin so people on the street wouldn’t know about his fate, maybe he’d actually let people touch him instead of jerking violently at even the wind, if it dares to get too close.

Maybe if Virgil wasn’t so closed off he would’ve known sooner…

---

God how Virgil wished this would just be a normal day. How he wished he could turn back time and just, make things better. Patton was running just a bit too fast down the school’s hallway, Logan was walking a bit too slow to carry on a conversation outside of Virgil’s classroom. And suddenly, Logan’s back was slammed into by Patton’s chest, knocking them both over in the process. Logan gasped, but not in pain, and frantically tried feeling at his back. Patton took a minute more to realise what was happening, to even realise that had hit someone and fell.

“Logan?! Are you okay?!” virgil helped him up and tried his best to ignore the growing crowd of people. Logan didn’t seem to notice, or if he didn’t, he didn’t care.

“Check, please check” logan panted out, still not quite being able to grasp the situation. Virgil grimaced as he pulled the back of Logan’s shirt up and sure enough, his previously black stained skin was now covered in bright shades of blue, standing out against the rainbows. Patton was frantically pulling at his own collar, pushing it down just enough to expose the bright rainbow colors of a newly found soulmate.

“Oh my goodness!!!!” patton squealed jumping up and nearly tackling logan in a hug. And for the first time any of them have ever seen, logan laughed. He actually laughed as he wrapped his arms around patton and hugged him back. Sure, him and virgil had been friends for a while and he had seen logan chuckle, but this was different. This was a full blown laugh. Logan was happy. The local “i don’t need a soulmate” emotionless robot had seemed to completely forget his disinterest as he grabbed on tight to the happiest person in the world. Patton had tears in his eyes as he laughed too. Of course the goofiest, most clumsy boy in school ends up with a boy like him.

Virgil felt sick. He always heard that seeing someone get a soulmate was beautiful, “almost as beautiful as meeting your own” apparently. But seeing his best friend so happy, hugging a boy with a rainbow chest, it was just another reminder that of course virgil didn’t have a soulmate, and of course his best friend did.

---

Everyone always thought roman would be one of the many people to not notice when their soulmark changed colors. Too many people brushed against each other in a crowd, never to be seen or heard from again. Most people assumed that since he did such vivid arm movements when he talked, expressing himself much like a cartoon, he’d end up somehow slapping someone who sat to close and not realising it.

“How could i ever not realise i touched my soulmate?! Its my true love i think i would know!!” princey said, wildly gesturing with his fork accidently slapping someone with a piece of chicken before plopping it into his mouth, completely oblivious.

“Are you 100% certain you would notice?” Patton had very quickly been pulled into their group of friends after the whole soulmate incident. Virgil hated seeing them together. He hated seeing the two together everyday and not being able to suppress his anger and sadness over not having someone to make him that happy. Almost everyone was surprised that logan “i don’t want a soulmate”  berry was nearly constantly holding hands with patton foster and almost everyone could admit that he looked happier after they met. it made virgil sick.

“I’m just saying if this nerd found a soulmate before me something must be wrong with fate!” the conversation faded out as virgil stared off into space. All this soulmate talk never failed to make virgil uncomfortable. They knew he was still there right? He was snapped out of his thoughts by a grape smacking him straight in the face.

“Yo, stormcloud, you good?” roman never really was good at comforting, or being nice for that matter. He tended to upset people without meaning to with his mannerisms and jokes and nicknames. Half the school hated him and he had no idea what he did.

“Yeah, fine” virgil replied darkly, hiding a bit more behind his jet black bangs. He knew it was irrational to be angry at the group, none of them were responsible for his lack of soulmate. That was all his fault for being born wrong.

“I’m going to the bathroom” he choked out, leaving the table with tears in his eyes. Maybe he could just skip the rest of the school day. Then he wouldn’t have to see any godforsaken soul couples with their hand holding and forehead kissing and reminders of how virgil would never have that.

---

Maybe if he hadn’t come to school today none if this would’ve happened. Maybe if he just stayed home his life would forever be different.

Maybe if he’d just stayed home he wouldn’t be having a panic attack with Roman prince sitting in front of him trying to calm him down.

“I can’t- i can’t- I can’t- I cant-” his breath came in violent hiccups as he reached into his hair and started to pull. Roman had never seen him so torn up over something so small like a kiss on the cheek. It was like the littlest things set him off anymore.

“please try and breathe Virgil, come on, deep breaths” he had no idea what he was doing and just prayed that he helped him in some way. Virgil shook his head and violently jerked away from Romans hand when it reached out to touch him.

“it’s not- it’s not fucking fair! It’s not fair it’s not fair” Virgil cried, curling in on himself, crying so hard he could puke. It wasn’t fair that other people got to be happy when Virgil didn’t. It wasn’t fair that Virgil got called names and pushed around just because he didn’t have a soulmate. It wasn’t fair.

Roman was desperately trying to calm down the boy in front of him, resisting the urge to just hug him and hold him tight. But Virgil didn’t like touching. And he definitely didn’t want to be touched now when he was freaking out over soulmates, when he was panicking.

But his hands were pulling at his hair, he was going to hurt himself if he didn’t stop soon.

Roman weighed his options and decided that he’d help calm him down after he made sure he was safe.

“Virgil please..” Roman reached his hand out to pull virgils hands away from his scalp, but Virgil jerked his away, trying to avoid contact, and left romans hand nowhere to go but in his hair.

And it was so much more beautiful than they could’ve ever imagined. It felt like Sparks and birthdays and puppies and love. All the negative emotions drained from them immediately, leaving them both gasping at the sudden change. Virgil’s hair burst into colors, shades of purples and blues outshining the rest.

“but… I thought I didn’t..” Virgil shot up from the floor and ran to the mirror. Hoping ad begging that he wasn’t just imagining the feeling. And he was more than overjoyed that his edgy vibe was brutally murdered by his now rainbow hair.

And he smiled. He smiled and smiled and smiled and smiled. He finally understood why couple’s acted the way they did when they met their soulmate. Why Logan was laughing, why Patton was crying, why even if you met in the middle of a tragedy you couldn’t help feeling like it’d all be okay. It was all so much love that left no room for pain or negativity. And then Virgil was crying, this time tears of joy.

“dude..” Roman whispered before jumping to his feet,“ DUDE!!!! Your hair!!! My hand!! Oh my God oh my fucking God look!!!” Roman gestures wildly towards his own hand, bouncing up and down like a middle schooler.

And then Roman was close, and closer, and then they were hugging and everything was electric. Romans head was nestled into Virgil’s hair, and it felt perfect. He placed a kiss right on the top of Virgil’s head, and it was fireworks all over again.

“is this how it’s gonna feel Everytime we touch?” Roman whispered, more to himself than anything, “ cause I’m never letting you go”

“Never let me go…”

#thomas sanders #sander sides #virgil sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #logicality #prinxiety

[lunar-lair]

Bakusquad Headcanons

Uhhhh idk how but I ended up with a ton of headcanons for these dork kids, so uh. Here I guess??

After Bakugou really settles into the group and begins to let them actually physically touch him, Ashido's hand is basically constantly buried in his hair, especially when she's comforting him. Of course, she does this with all the others too, and has been doing it with Kirishima since their middle school days, but she's always saying Bakugou's is the fluffiest. ("It's just cause I use the best conditioner," He'd always huff.)

Kaminari has this habit with all of them. He'll put his pointer finger on some part of their body-usually their cheek, since that makes them laugh more for it's cuteness-and let a small, sm all static shock run through their skin. It never fails to make them laugh, and along with his jokes, he's one of the best at cheering people up in the team.

Whenever they're all cuddling, and one of them is cold, they snuggle up with Bakugou, and he'll heat up his hands like he does before he blows something up. But it's just really nice and warm. Not a bad warm either. Plus, he just runs warm anyways. (So does Kaminari-he's got electricity running around in his veins, they're gonna be warm-and Sero's not bad himself, but they don't have that advantage. (On the contrary, Kiri runs pretty cold, and Bakugou calls Mina 'barbie' just because she's basically freezing all the time.))

Any time Bakugou gets the chance, he'll just idly braid anyone's hair that's long enough to braid; aka, everyone except him and Mina. It's just really relaxing for him.

They all have these special hoodies, shirts, whatever, that they wear when they're real unhappy or just feeling really cozy comfy warm and shit and it's real easy to tell which one it is, so they just adjust the way they treat that person to accommodate

They all brought a bean bag a bit into the year that was their favorite color and they're all just piled in Sero's room cause he has the most room.

After realizing saying 'we need to talk' is a bit daunting, the squad made a little code phrase for when it's Serious Talk Time, whether that means later or now, and it's "I've got a story to tell". They decided on it pretty early on, but late enough that Bakugou was willing to participate in said talks in the first place, obviously.

They always have excellent nail polish, make up, whatever. Mina's pretty good at it, and Bakugou had fashion designers for parents. He wasn't getting out of his childhood without some Knowledge. Anyways, they're always perfectly presentable. It's great.

The whole squad is constantly secretly trying to destroy all of Kiri's crocs. Shh, don't tell.

Bakugou is entirely infuriated with Kaminari and Mina's hair, 24/7. Kaminari's won't settle down from it's staticyness for more then two seconds, and Mina's is just fucking untameable. He doesn't like Sero's much, since it's not long enough to do as much as he can with Kaminari's, and it's th ick, bitch. Kiri's is the most agreeable when it's down.

At some point, they bought a giant teddy bear. They only bring it out when someone is in severe emotional destress. It is The Happiness Bear. It has a few rips and burns and torn off fur, from Kiri, Kami Baku and Mina, and Sero respectively.

None of them agree on music choice. Mina likes bubblegum pop, Kiri's about more somber stuff, Sero listens to indie, Bakugou listens to rock, metal, and pop-punk-that scene-and Kaminari just listens to whatever he comes across. He had some really obscure music on his playlist, some emo, and even some shit like Beyonce and Taylor Swift, sittin right next to Ricky Montgomery and The Altogether. He's the most agreeable when it comes to listening with others, but theirs is always a bit...too much for him, since he's in the middle. Think of him as the circle and everyone else laying just outside the circle. The circle can't really expand, but the points aren't as broad. He's gets along best with Kiri and Sero, since he had plenty of chill music on his list, and some real obscure indie-ish shit somewhere. Bakugou likes some of the darker stuff he's run across, like Autoheart. He used to be REAL into All Time Low, but burnt himself out on their music. He knows every song, and every lyric; he doesn't hate it. It's just not his first pick. And then he's still got some shit like Owl City and Fun lurking around somewhere, and that's the shit Mina likes. Basically, he gets the most band recommendations, and gives the most.

Bakugou gets REALLY into Autoheart and Lincoln, shit like that as he gets older and mellows out-kinda like mid 2nd to 3rd year and on?-since it's still that kind of depressing feel but it's a lot more lowkey.

Kiri gets DE EP into The Altogether and Ricky Montgomery, and maybe Cavetown and The Oh Hellos, Sleeping At Last, Alec Benjamin...all those almost-sleepy singers, who sing about both sad and happy shit with the same calm tone.

Kaminari gets just,,,,SO into The Wrecks for like,,,,a month, with their party music vibe that's almost All Time Low but with more energy this time.

Mina's always been a Beyonce and Owl City stan, man.

Sero doesn't mind Owl City, either, though; got that kinda tone to it, yknow? Absolutely into Fun.

Skskdkdk sorry I got into a BIG tangent,,,,I just know so many obscure bands that they'd like man

Also I hella projected onto Kaminari bc I feel like he's that dork to be into a song called "Favorite Liar', another called 'Mediocre At Best', one called 'Agrophobia', and ANOTHER called fucking 'Light'.

Also he's definitely into Mother Mother. That's a must. Sero might be too.

Might make,,,,,a separate post abt that

Kami and Sero rlly like fall

Mina's a winter gal

Kiri's all for summer

And Baku's all bout spring

They have had multiple discussions about scars for no reason other than to discuss something.

Kami is ALWAYS letting off a static shock of SOME KIND and he shocks the first person he touches when he wakes up. Once he did this to Jirou and it partly fried her buds for a while, it blew Bakugou up because he had just walked in from his jog, it conducted with some of Mina's acid and fucked her over, etc etc. So Kirishima is always sent to wake Kaminari up, and all of them have rubber gloves on hand early morning just in case he wakes up before Kiri can be the first to touch him and he groggily tries to touch anyone

Bakugou's room smells like caramel due to nitroglycerin smelling like it 24/7, and it's calming as hell, so that's where they go when they need a good calming cuddle pile

They always do a group hug before and after dangerous missions

...just in case.

They go to the park at least once a month bc why tf not? And they always hog all the swing sets. Bakugou usually goes on a jog.

One of Kaminari's favorite ways to fuck with them is to let his hands hum with just a small bit of static and then POOF up their hair

It's always hilarious

Especially on Bakugou, since it just makes it kinda,,,,poof mo re??? It's hilarious trust me-

If Sero could make a conductive kind of tape, him and Kami could totally have a type of electroweb attack. Or maybe if Mina's acid could conduct well enough she could like spread all over the ground and it would work as a way to direct his electricity his pointers may not help with. Like zeroing in his electricity in little spots under villian's feet and giving Kami good control in the ground too and it could cause less damage! Plus maybe if he lost his pointer or smth she could put it on the villian and then they would get electricity right to the skin? Idk something like that

Hm...his combos with Baku are limited. It's possible he could like coat his hands with his sweat and then Kami could blow it up himself if his quirk is out of commission? Or his arms; we know they get recoil in canon. But maybe he could soak something in the nitroglycerin using the grenades-just open em i guess?-and then set it ablaze?? It'd have to be a PRETTY special case tbh

If civilians could possibly be harmed Kiri could act as a lighting rod,,,,using a lightning rod attacked to his head?? Or some super conductive clothing or something. Idk.

Everybody knows you could bathe Kiri in the sweat and then he'd ignite it no prob

Sero could swing one of them (or multiple) and then 'oh shit a flying bomb/rock/acidic substance/electricity plants comin ur way' i guess

Idk. I swore to God Baku was my fav but I'm bein real biased towards Kami. Sigh...oh well. I'll work on it later. It's late.

#this got fuckin long #but i have;;;;no regrets #take it. it took like and hour anf a half to make lol #bnha #bnha headcanons #bakusquad #trash talks

[eijiroukiriot]

After Months of saying i would i’m finally posting about my Kiribaku playlist! I’ve linked it before but I’ve never really gone into what the songs mean to me and how I see them in relation to the boys, and I think the explanations puts things into perspective, so I typed it all out!

This is my main krbk playlist - I also have playlists for Bakugou and Kirishima separately - and this focuses mostly on happier songs (and a few that are so ingrained into how I see them that I had to put them in anyway). I also have an angst-themed krbk playlist and post-breakup playlists for each of them! Really I just. love music and love seeing characters I like in it so this is fun for me 

Spotify Link

song descriptions under the cut!

i typed up all of this after 1 a.m. last night so not only is it very long it’s also somewhat incoherent but these songs mean a lot to me so if you’re down to read it then thank you!!

note: a few of these songs aren’t available on spotify at the moment but they’re so crucial to the Vibe that i’ve still included them here!

i. I Always Knew - The Vaccines

“So let’s go to bed, before we say something real - 

Let’s go to bed, before we say how we feel” 

-this is my Ultimate krbk song, man. the first time i heard it i was walking to class and i just had to stop on the sidewalk and take a Big deep breath. everything abt the lyrics fits them so well - i’ve talked about this before but the verses and prechoruses really capture that “being young and stupid and tiptoeing around your emotions” feeling, then the chorus hits and it just SOARS, and really, has there ever been a sentiment that fits them more than “it’s always been you” 

ii. Fly Me to the Moon/Lucky - Rick Hale

“Fill my heart with song and let me sing forevermore - 

Tell me I’m the lucky one you worship and adore” 

-I have an extreme soft spot for these boys and love songs. and this has been a part of my fic writing playlists for so long that it always makes me think of them. I don’t even have a lot to say by way of lyrics, this is a full atmosphere pick 

iii. If My Heart Was A House - Owl City

“Circle me and the needle moves gracefully back and forth -

If my heart was a compass, you’d be north” 

-boy if this song doesn’t make me think of bkg every time!! it’s the transition from the prechorus into the chorus that gets me - it starts so quiet, like there’s so much love inside of you that you’re still trying to keep down, and then the “bombs away” is the moment when you decide to stop running and just embrace it, and the chorus comes in so loud and strong and so thoroughly in love. call me a sap (spoilers: i do that myself multiple times here) but it really does remind me of what it must be like when bkg just...decides to let himself have this. and then i feel dumb bc this is about anime boys who are like not in love in canon at all but inside the intricate Kiribaku Canon i have built in my head oh yeah this is how bkg falls in love

iv. Knock Three Times - Tony Orlando

“One floor below me, you don’t even know me - I love you” 

-this is just the prime soundtrack for a college AU where kirishima’s dorm is right above bkg’s and he’s in Love with him. And Also, something about the bold retro vibe makes me think of kirishima, but that almost certainly a me thing! still a big bop though 

v. Intergalactic Disco - Interlunium

“So, with stars in our eyes, let’s fly through the glowing galaxies” 

-again, a big sappy atmosphere pick! i really do love the imagery in this one and the storyline of playing things off as just having a good time until it turns out the other person is as deeply in love as you are. it really is just That Song! please stan interlunium

vi. Animal - Neon Trees

“Here we go again, I kinda wanna be more than friends” 

-the ENERGY in this song!! the loud, highkey, driving beat! the vibes of being young and stupid and stumbling through having feelings for someone equally as inexperienced with love as you are! and yet the fact that we KNOW both of them would run full-force with it once they realize they both want it! the lyrics to this one do get a bit spicy but it’s really the high school crush energy in this one that gets me 

vii. If You Wanna - The Vaccines

“I don't want to do things independently, but I can't make you stay -

That's what all the friends I do not like as much as you say...but if you wanna come back it's alright”

-the ENERGY in this SONG!!!! the electric guitar and the chorus so long you think he’ll run out of breath! bkg getting so fed up with being so close to kirishima’s face and not being able to kiss it that he takes the dive and goes for it and then goes to run away until kirishima yells WAIT- IF YOU WANNA COME BACK IT’S ALRIGHT!!!

viii. No One Like You - Best Coast

“Been around this crazy world, but I still wanna be your girl - 

Cause there’s no one like you.” 

-I feel like...if krbk had a cheesy high school romcom, and everything led up to a big dance at the end, and at the very end the camera panned out as they finally caved into each other and went onto the floor to do that slow dance, this would be the song. This is their slow dance 

-seriously like 70% of the lyrics to this song are “there’s no one like you” which is really, once again, just the Pinnacle of krbk 

ix. Idfc - Blackbear

“'Cause I have hella feelings for you -

I act like I don't fucking care, 'cause I'm so fucking scared” 

-the bkg energy in this song...the self doubt and the pining but the deep-seated belief that you don’t deserve this, even though you’re so close, even though he keeps telling you he loves you- but how could he, he has to be lying, and why would you even care, you don’t care about people like this- you never have, until now...oh this song is just DRIPPING in it

x. My Best Friend’s Hot - The Dollyrots

“Won’t you apologize to me, to me, to me? For being such a tease, a tease, a tease” 

-it’s a song about being pissed at your oblivious hot best friend who you have a huge crush on! they might as well have credited the lyrics to bakugou katsuki 

xi. Stay by My Side - Twice

“I can’t hold it back anymore - 

I can’t even believe how much I love you” 

-it’s Cheesy Romance! it’s cheesy romance that’s all this is!!! this one is pure michigan cheese!!!!! 

xii. Love Line - Twice

“With you by my side, I wanna take a shot, take a walk on the love line” 

-again this is a very me pick! this one’s been sitting around on my writing playlists for a long time and i’ve come to really associate it w these Boys. the member who wrote the lyrics has said it was about her first crush and it’s generally about just. being So enamored with someone you can’t stop thinking about them. and i’m a big sap so you know where that goes 

xiii. Maybe (Luck of the Draw) - The Vaccines

“There’s nobody else like you, there’s nobody else like you -

And if there’s nobody else like you, then maybe I want to spend my life with you” 

-this one always sounds to me like krbk growing up, spending late nights both awake in the dimly-lit kitchen of their second apartment, watching the hours tick by on the microwave clock as they just talk and argue and make each other laugh and slowly realizing that this is by no means perfect but there’s no one else they’d rather keep getting old with...i feel like this is another end credits song for them, you know? 

xiv. I’m Totally Obsessed with Him - Matt Fishel

“He’s in my heart, he’s in my lungs - he’s in everything that I touch” 

-matt fishel deserves SO much more than he gets i mean LISTEN to this huge campy gay anthem about being just extremely an unapologetically in love with your big gay boyfriend!!!! i feel bad making pride anthems like this about anime boys but i’m also gay and i’m here to say that the absolute SCALE of this - the explosion of electricity and infatuation and campy guitar in the chorus - this one has BIG kirishima energy. words can’t do it justice just please please listen to this one 

xv. Slayers - Matt Fishel (again lol) 

“We’re in this together, you and I -

Hand in hand, side by side, unbreakable” 

-It’s a song about being in love with someone who you see as your total partner, you rely on each other and protect each other and you’re with each other through everything, and it’s written through the lens of a fantasy story - this one always, always makes me think of the two of them in the fantasy AU, sworn partners for life, able to rise above any challenges in their path, flying into the sunset together after a long day of adventures, so happy that it seems to make the world spin 

-this really may be the most krbk song i’ve ever heard so please listen to it, 

-i played it for my krbk friend once and when he said unbreakable they started screaming

xvi. Hooked On a Feeling - Blue Swede

“I’m high on believing you’re in love with me -

I said, I’m hooked on a FEELING!!!!!”

-picture this: class A crammed into a karaoke room for a party, kirishima standing up in front of the scream and screaming “THIS ONE’S FOR YOU BKG” and belting out the entire thing, slightly off pitch but FULL of spirit, every time ‘girl’ comes up in the lyrics he sings ‘bakugou’ really really fast (‘I CAN’T STOP THIS FEELING, deep inSIIIde of me, bakugouyoujust don’t reallize!!! what you do to me!!!!”) and everyone is whooping and hollering along except bkg who gets so red that nobody can tell if it’s angry embarrassment or in love god just so in love embarrassment 

-it’s hooked on a feeling it has such loud kirishima energy do i have to explain myself here

xvii. Everyday I Love You - ViVi (Loona) 

“If only you liked me - if only you loved me

Like a fool, I think only of you” 

-note 1: stan loona

-note 2: this song is just such a sweet picture of pining!! imagining the stolen glances and ‘hopeless’ crush feeling when (in some AU where they both have. less emotional hangups the first time they meet) they first meet,, i can’t explain it for this one even it just makes me so soft 

xviii. Crush - Weki Meki

“This feeling- like I’m losing, it’s hurting my pride

But I can’t help it, I’m so curious that I’m going crazy” 

-i’m sure you can tell by now that i. Really like kpop but the first time i read the lyrics to this one i lost it! there are really too many lyrics than i can fit here that remind me of how bkg sees kirishima when he first realizes it’s really a crush that’s making him act like this - i really recommend that you take a look at the translation for this one!! it really has it all - being mad at your crush for how they make your heart pound, feeling like it’s hurting your pride, “it’s not like me to be circling around you like this, i’m gonna make a move”, the line about how “i’ll be better to you than anyone else” - seriously, i cannot exaggerate the bkg energy in these lyrics 

xix. Kimi Janakya Dame Mitai - Masayoshi Ohishi

“I want to get to know you more and more - but that kind of line doesn’t really fit me” 

-aaaand here’s a song that radiates EXTREME Kirishima Energy!! everything from the vibrant guitar to the big belted chorus to the lyrics about being, like, confused but absolutely buzzing and just wanting to be with them - it’s loud and bright and awkward but THRILLED about every part of it!!

-it, of course, helps that the title essentially means “it’s gotta be you” 

xx. I Do Adore - Mindy Gledhill

“Everything you do - it sends me higher than the moon” 

-like….is there a more classic song to associate with your favorite stupid pining high schoolers ship 

-don’t get me wrong i KNOW this one is cliche and i KNOW there’s other ships this fits better but i’m soft don’t @ me 

xxi. Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You - Frankie Valli

-legally this song is only Half in the playlist bc spotify likes taking it down and putting it back up at random but after writing fly me i can’t NOT think abt krbk when i hear it. i have no further justification 

-also imagine kirishima being loud and embarrassing and singing this song to bkg all the time

xxii. Television/So Far So Good - Rex Orange County 

“I don't know, no, I don't know what you like,

But if you're looking for something new, I know somebody that you could choose: 

What about me?” 

-what about MEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEe 

-i think it’s that driving guitar rhythm that makes this one for me. it just sounds so...ready to take on this weird new feeling of knowing how perfectly things could go with someone if you both just took the jump. it sounds very kirishima. 

-the content does start changing as it keeps going but those first few minutes and the RAP VERSE really have such bubbly dumb teenage ‘it’s our first time feeling like this and it might be a little too serious for us but why don’t we take the leap i’m sure it’ll be worth it’ vibes. it really feels like the first “what about me???” in the chorus should be accompanied by kirishima sprinting up to bkg and lifting him up and kissing him because he’s so caught up in this feeling

xxiii. Sweet Talk - Saint Motel

“When you laugh, I forget that it’s about me 

But it’s alright - cause being your punchline still is something” 

-we all know this is a krbk song, everyone knows it’s a krbk song, my non-bnha friend who I annoy constantly w krbk stuff knows this is a krbk song, honestly do I even have to explain why? it contains the line “you could yell ‘piss off, won’t you stay away’ - it’d still be sweet talk to my ears” and we All know how whipped kirishima already is 

xxiv. Into The Storm - Banners

“Through night and dark, through fantasies that fall apart,

Know you're always in my heart, anywhere you go” 

-Unconditional love! Working through the hard times together! and knowing these two, there have been & will be no shortage of hard times to work through. it’s that loyalty and devotion that makes this one. 

xxv. Talk Too Much - COIN

“Stay cool, it’s just a kiss - so, why you gotta be so talkative?” 

-when it comes down to it bkg and kirishima are two idiot 16 year olds who have never been in love before so you know they’re gonna stumble a lot when they first get together. i don’t know how to explain it but i think this really captures that

-also i feel like this is a pretty staple krbk song! i see it on so many playlists

xxvi. If I Tremble - Front Porch Step

“And if I tremble at the sight of you, it’s not because I’m cold -

It’s because I’m staring at the girl I want to love me when I’m old” 

-that idea of the kind of love you want to last forever, knowing the person you want to grow old with...I honestly don’t like this one for them that much anymore but it Did make me cry the first time I thought about it so it gets to stay. tbh when I’m soft enough it still gets me 

xxvii. Cold Cold Man - Saint Motel

“You’re the only one worth seeing, the only place worth being -

The only bed worth sleeping is the one right next to you” 

-Saint Motel is just krbk culture at this point, this is another staple krbk song. I mean, the core theme is “I know I’m an asshole but I love you more than anyone” - come ON

xxviii. Wonderful Things - Ryan Corn

“So you say you wanna grab hold - well to hold, you’ve gotta let go

Of the only way you may have ever known” 

-is this song about god? maybe. is it about krbk? Oh absolutely 

-the themes of not knowing what you’d do without the other person in your life, and looking back on the person you were able to become because of them, and that lyric up there always makes me think of Kamino - it’s just all around got the themes and I’m very soft about that

xxix. Bad Enough For You - All Time Low 

“You love to hate me when I'm chasing you, 

And I hate to say this, but I'm stuck on loving you” 

-Okay this is totally 12-year-old me talking here but hear me out: Bakugou being convinced Kirishima could never like him more than this weird half-flirting thing they’ve come to and also being scared that he’d never be good enough for him, but him as he is now is letting them HAVE this half-flirting thing, so...he keeps it up, even though he wishes he could be the one to treat him how he deserves to be treated, but there’s no way he could be Kirishima’s boyfriend anyway so what’s the point in caring (but kirishima loved him the WHOLE TIME!!! they sort things out before long lol)

-also they’re both 16 and emo so. 

xxx. Instead of My Room - Charlie Burg 

“Can't we just put on Ramones? And we'll drive

And I'll kiss you, in my car, instead of my room” 

-if kirishima wrote songs with kaminari and sero during high school, i think they’d sound like this

-the lyrics to this one are just so Fun! it’s goofy and jokey and just having a good time! i can’t make the lyrics line up as much as i’d like them to but it really just sounds like them to me 

xxxi. I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing - Aerosmith 

“I don’t wanna close my eyes -

I don’t wanna fall asleep, cause I’d miss you, babe” 

-i have exactly 2 krbk moods and one is “they are stupid. 16 and loud and just so dumb” and the other is “this is Love love, they’re gonna live off this forever” 

-kirishima looking over at bkg fast asleep the night after their wedding and feeling so wholly in love that he cries 

xxxii. Stutter - Marianas Trench

“So here I am - you can take or leave me,

But I won't ever be anywhere but here” 

-If krbk starred in a mid-2000s battle of the bands romcom with a car chase scene this is the song that would play in the trailer (I KNOW that’s crazy specific but that’s the image I always get when I hear this) 

xxxiii. Must Have Done Something Right - Reliant K 

“If anyone could make me a better person, you could -

All I gotta say is I must have done something good” 

-i feel like i’m 13 when i hear this song but it’s really really Them

-really i think the thing that keeps me so invested in krbk is that they’re so involved with each other’s character arcs - they’re constantly making each other better people, each of them is like a missing piece for the other, and they’re both so wrapped up in their own shortcomings that they barely even realize how big of an impact they’re having on the other. but really they would never be the same if they hadn’t met. and that’s the entirety of this song’s content

xxxiv. Deer in the Headlights - Owl City 

“Tell me again, was it love at first sight

When I walked by and you caught my eye?” 

-there is literally nothing in the lyrics that makes me think of them. this one is 100% for the vibe. and also kinda the lyrics in the chorus. like, being taken aback by how suddenly everything is happening but in a very excited and enthusiastic way. things don’t go Smoothly when they confess, persay, but oh man is it memorable (and loud and sweaty and hoarse-throated but never, ever sad) 

xxxv. On and On (About You) - Bowling For Soup 

“Now you can scream about the little things, slap me twice across the face,

Man it would be great if I could buy you flowers every day” 

-this is really middle school me speaking here BUT: 

-krbk don’t exactly work out in high school and end with some big fight but with time they both realize they were wrong and when they finally meet again at a class reunion they both wanna get back together but they’re still arguing and shooting quick remarks at each other but the whole time they’re thinking “man, if i could, i’d buy you flowers every day” 

xxxvi. Mamma Mia - ABBA

-it’s mamma mia. it’s just mamma mia

-it’s also kirishima’s inner monologue every time he thinks he’s finally kicked his crush on bkg and then he sees him for 0.1 seconds and falls right back in 

xxxvii. I Dare You - The Regrettes

“I can't seem to sleep, and I feel my pulse beating

I wanna keep all my control, but you're the one that brings the sun” 

-maybe it just reminds me of the music video song in quote love unquote but the second i heard this song i was like oh yeah that’s kiribaku

-the idea of trying to catch yourself as you feel yourself falling but also choosing to make the jump in the first place! the idea that you’re taking a big chance but things are so much better together that you’re not scared! you’re even pushing yourself forward! it’s truly for them 

xxxviii. I Want to Hold Your Hand - the version from Yesterday

-like, fuck the beatles but it’s a song about hand holding. come on 

xxxix. Love At First Sight - The Brobecks

“Turn the lights off, I’m in love” 

-that lyric has happened in canon. that lyric is the context of why bkg went to bed at 8:32 pm that one time 

-it’s such a sweet mix of being scared about falling in love but also...feeling like the world just got a little brighter, and kinda letting yourself sink into it in reluctant acceptance because it just feels so good? kinda hitting the same notes as If My Heart Was A House. idk the first time i heard this i thought abt the girl i have a crush on so i was like “nope. nope. refocus this to krbk” 

xxxx. Holliday - The Weekend Run Club 

“I'd never been so soaked before

I was drenched in your arms, dancing in your downpour” 

-this was on my discover weekly last week and I put it on here without thinking about it and now I”m really listening to it for the first time and. wow. Wow. 

-you know the scenario i’ve been bringing up this whole time of taking a leap into something awkward and electric that makes you happier than you could imagine? that’s the energy i’m getting from this

-just imagining krbk being out on their first date and it starts pouring so they duck inside and they’re like “well...should we just go back?” and then realize it’s so much more like them to run out into the downpour and get soaked and kirishima’s losing his mind laughing and bkg’s like “what are you so happy about idiot” and kirishima’s just like “i don’t know. i just really like this. i just really like you” and then they’re both kinda floating on air

#i know it's long but!!!! i Finished typing it #thoughts #kiribaku #also not to pat my own back but i personally think this playlist. like. slaps #i listen to it a lot and it has a lot of music i like on it! definitely not everyone's tastes but a very strong look into mine #anyway i love them and i've been putting this playlist together so long it just keeps growing and growing #this is in no way its final form it's gonna keep getting longer!! #playlists