#had a formal diagnosis for adhd but not for ASD | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

aintmyjewelry · 1 year

Note

How did you end up getting diagnosed? Was it a long process with a thousand dollar test or could you get it another way? I'm looking to get tested

(apologies, this is a pretty long post about the process but I hope it helps!!)

So for my diagnosis, I went through a neuropsychological center to get a neuropsychological evaluation and I initially went bc my therapist suspected ADHD but I tacted on the ASD testing because my mom has always been suspicious, haha (I think you have to go to a neuropsychological center for ASD but don't quote me on that)

The process was both long and not long. I initially reached out to the center to set up an appointment in late November. However, due to anxiety, I was really slow at responding to their emails and following up. By the time I was able to kick myself into gear (which was around Christmas), the closest appointment that worked with my schedule was in early March (March 10). I also had to set up an intake appointment (March 1) and then a follow-up appointment (today, March 22). I also had to provide my health insurance information right away before they set up any appointments.

Everything kind of happened quickly from there. There was a LOT of paperwork to fill out prior to my intake appointment. This included family history reports, self-reports (just symptoms I'm experiencing and such), contracts/agreements, etc. The paperwork is probably the most exhausting part especially if you ever feel like me and ur like "should I really be doing this? am i just being dramatic?"

I had to have the paperwork in before my intake appointment and then for the intake appointment it was like about 30-45 minutes and mine was with a postdoctorate student (the psychologist was out of the office that day). He basically reviewed the paperwork I had submitted and discussed what I was concerned about, what symptoms I was having, etc.

At the end of the intake appt, I was sent MORE paperwork lmao but these were like questionnaires (they covered both ASD and ADHD). They asked me questions about how i personally felt, my habits, some of my interests, socializing, empathy, etc. I was asked about the current day and childhood. My mom was also given questionnaires and I think hers were also a mix of current and childhood behaviors.

I had to hand in the questionnaires the day of my testing so I did that morning and then went in for testing. Testing for me was about 5 hours long and it was exhausting. It can be even longer depending on what tests you are going in for and if they have anything else they notice and want to explore (with ur permission). But mine was just one day, it went from about 9am-2pm and I had a break for lunch.

The evaluation itself was a lot. They described it as a "stress test for your brain" and they were NOT kidding. It was a mix of puzzles, electronic tests, verbal tests, memory, some tests on paper, etc. It was a lot but my tester was very nice and patient.

That then brings me to today which was my "feedback appt" where I met virtually with the psychologist and he walked me through results of EVERY test, including the questionnaires I and my mom completed. He gave his initial interpretations (as I have discussed in other posts lmao) and was very thorough and answered questions. It was about an hour long. I was not prescribed anything or referred for any treatment. I am not sure if that comes with the diagnosis stuff or not but, in the meantime, I will be seeking out my own psychiatrist to discuss medications for the anxiety and depression factors my psychologist noted (and boy were they high, he was stunned).

I now basically wait for the formal diagnosis papers which can take 6-8 weeks, give or take.

One thing I did not like about the place I went to is the psychologist was very much into "differentiating" the "types" of autism. For me he used the term "Aspergers" a lot which I don't like for many reasons and it generally is not a term autistic people use anymore (I especially didn't like that he called me an "Aspie" and called autism the "trendy phrase" - it was kind of weird). It's all just under ASD. and he eventually specifically described me as ASD level 1 which is in the DSM.

Now, as for the COST of everything, I have insurance through my parents, I am still under their plan. Going into this, I didn't know if my insurance would cover it at all. This was very much something where I was just gonna bite the bullet and do it for my own sake. As I said previously, they asked for my insurance right away and bc they moved ahead I assumed they accepted it (their website said they took my insurance as well but my insurance can be weird lmao). There was a $50 fee I had to pay up front that insurance would not cover (it was for testing materials). Without insurance, the whole thing came out to be over $3,000. WITH insurance, I will be paying about $1,100.

I am not sure if there is another way to go about getting a diagnosis. I am not sure if psychiatrists can do anything when it comes to this. I think psychiatrists can but you have to go to someone who specializes in ASd. My therapist recommended I look for a place that did neuropsychological evaluations because they will look at like ur whole brain basically (not literally tho lmao there was no tests like that) and if it wasn't ASD or ADHD they can suggest other things. so that is why I took the route I took!

But, yeah, that was my experience. I hope I laid it out all okay - if you have questions please feel free to ask, I can try to answer them but, fair warning, I might not have all the answers 😅

9 notes · View notes

likeabxrdinflight · 2 years

Note

Hi! I just read your post on Azula and diagnosing her and/or other fictional characters with mental illness. I really appreciated the read.

As a person who has struggled with mental illness and a neurodivergency called NVLD (similar to ASD and ADHD, but neither), I find it very important to be careful with mental health headcanons and avoid ableism. I really enjoy researching many different things related to psychology, primarily using peer reviewed articles and print sources. I did develop a headcanon that Azula would be diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder after the age of eighteen, based on the research I did and on personal experiences I have had with people I knew with the disorder. I can see why people would disagree with this headcanon and that’s valid. I want to make sure I’m not being careless in any way, shape, or form.

Ableism is something that has impacted me very, very negatively in my own life. I’ve had very distressing and stressful experiences due to people fundamentally misunderstanding neurodivergency and mental illness. I often struggle too because I can “pass” as neurotypical and without mental illness, so people tend to assume the worst when I miss social cues or act out when I’m stressed. One of the many things that drew me to Azula as a character is that I could relate to her inner conflicts, traumas, and emotions and feeling like I had to prove myself to people in order to be valued. And…the last thing I’d want to do is extend any ableism towards Azula in my writing of her in my fics. She is twenty when she is diagnosed with BPD in a modern setting with a trained psychologist. But I want to still be careful.

Sorry this is a long, rambly ask. My question would be: am I going about this in a healthy and respectful way or is there something I need to do differently?

I hope you have a great day! 😊

Hi! I totally respect wanting to be careful with mental illness/neurodiverse headcanons, but I definitely want to make it clear that the point of that post wasn't to tell people to never headcanon Azula as having some type of mental illness- especially mentally ill/neurodiverse people themselves. To me it sounds like you've really thought about this and have done far more research than most people would- looking at peer reviewed articles is already impressive for someone not in an academic field!

BPD Is a tough diagnosis, not because the disorder is some big bad scary thing, but because it's gotten a really bad rap over the years. I've had a lot of experience working with BPD clients since making that post, and it's always a hard diagnosis to give because there's so much stigma around it. I've spent many an hour now with patients just explaining the disorder and how I personally think about it in context of the individual person's life experiences/trauma history/early attachment relationships. And it overlaps with complex trauma a lot. So much so that the woman who first conceptualized C-PTSD (Judith Herman, absolute queen) acknowledges that many C-PTSD patients also meet criteria for BPD.

(C-PTSD is still not a formally recognized diagnosis so a lot of those patients end up with a BPD diagnosis anyway cuz that's what's in the book...)

Anyways, it sounds to me like you're doing the work to treat this diagnosis and Azula's character as respectfully as possible. I don't think there's any reason Azula couldn't, in theory, develop BPD, especially in a modern AU setting where I'm assuming fighting in the war isn't part of the story. BPD is a much more likely outcome to child abuse than a psychotic disorder for sure (though both are possible.) It's certainly far more likely than the other personality disorders fandom likes to give her. So I think keep doing what you're doing and you'll be just fine.

21 notes · View notes

saltymcsaltything · 1 year

Text

30 Days of Autism Acceptance - Day 2

2 April: When were you diagnosed and when did you know that you're autistic? If you're self-diagnosed, when did you first suspect that you're autistic and when were you sure?

I was formally diagnosed April 16, 2021 at age 41. My wife told me she thought I might be autistic (based on recognizing traits from her own research and self-reflection) in the summer of 2020 after watching me suddenly and involuntarily unmask after my mom died in July of 2020. I started my own research within hours of her saying that, and eventually discovered #actuallyautistic here on Tumblr. I already had been diagnosed with general anxiety disorder, major depressive disorder, and complex PTSD, but there was clearly a lifelong pattern of physical, sensory and emotional differences going back into early childhood.

I was solidly convinced that I was autistic and probably ADHD by October after sharing my spreadsheet of traits and experiences with my therapist. I sought a formal diagnosis in order to get workplace accomodations, and to make sure I wasn't missing anything.

The formal diagnosis was ASD, ADHD, Dyspraxia and Dyslexia, with subclinical OCD traits. I wasn't familiar with Dyspraxia but it made perfect sense after it was explained to me. Dyslexia was surprising, but I understand now some of the ways it manifests - it is primarily eye-motor and short-term memory that impacts my reading, both of which intensify when I am fatigued, overwhelmed, felt ill or was very dizzy. After losing my mom, I was all of those things all the time and was struggling to read and retain anything. The OCD traits were primarily intrusive thoughts and some ritualistic behaviors, but both are hard to detangle from the ASD, CPTSD and GAD diagnoses.

At 43, my challenges are the most obvious and most disabling that they have been since 2nd grade. I am still learning more about my own past and understanding why it took me so long to understand how and why I struggled, and also how both good and bad fortune in my life mitigated and exacerbated my challenges.

#actually autistic #actuallyautistic #late diagnosed autistic #autistic experiences #autism acceptence month #autism acceptance #autistic adhd #autistic adult #neuroqueer #30daysofautismacceptance #2023

4 notes · View notes

holyhikari · 6 months

Text

some personal reflection on my late diagnosis and a few other stuff that might interest somebody or not.

I don't have ADHD, at least not "formally." I'm usually fine with not having qualified for an official ADHD diagnosis during my evaluation (even though a few professionals have argued that I should have had + my medication is ADHD-focused and it works) because I usually just need sensory/social accommodations and ASD covers that.

But it's absurd HOW LONG it took for me and the people around me to notice and accept how mentally hyperactive I am, because it carried me through my early academic life. So I was just "a very bright kid", not a single adult could tell (or, at least, no one thought of it as an issue) I was hyperfocused on and a bit obsessive about school because most subjects interested me, I couldn't control that drive nor my perfectionism and the good grades/the praise for them made me feel better about not understanding how to socialize with most other kids because they acted in ways that didn't make any sense and I was adamant that all of my actions could be reasonably explained to others since I was like five years old. So, yeah, we couldn't relate. I got along well with the weirdos though.

It's funny in a tragic way that sometimes adults can't tell you have socialization problems because you're well-spoken and mimic their communication patterns and don't have trouble following their instructions, but I assure you that the other kids CAN very much tell that you're not like them. (Fun fact: my mom DID notice that most other kids confused me and she was aware of/tried to help me through the bullying I suffered, but whenever I asked her opinion on the matter she just went "oh sweetie that's because you're around adults often and in this household we're all like this :D so it's only expected". LOL)

And since I couldn't have known that often overthinking to the point of tears AS A PRE-SCHOOLER (yes, I have memories of that) wasn't normal and assumed that everyone else had that many thoughts per second... well. That mental hyperactivity paired with the skills related to my special interest (linguistics) served me well until I crashed and suddenly had to navigate the world without the "high results" it allowed me to achieve as a kid.

And now I'm an adult who struggles with basic tasks like a toddler because I can't prioritize anything correctly unless I'm at gunpoint. And I'm perpetually underestimating my struggles, I try to convince myself on a daily basis that I'm just a regular 20-something mess in this world and that every young adult is like this simply because growing up is hard, so I must be trying to find excuses to be "lazy".

At least I know this experience isn't uncommon at all with late-diagnosed neurodivergent people.

I think I want to write more about my experiences. I might keep those reflections here since I (FINALLY) ditched T*itter and I don't want to do it anywhere with my IRL name. I feel even safer/detached here, typing in English instead of my first language has that effect xD

#bea with the tea #actually autistic #now back to fandom posting hopefully

1 note · View note

socoollike · 1 year

Text

Sometimes i look back at my childhood and realise there was so much in my head.

Sometimes i wonder if i have all these things like bpd, ocd, asd and adhd but im too scared to talk about it to my parents because from a young age my thoughts and my feelings were pushed aside or treated as a joke. My whole life especially in my early teen years i had a lot happening in my head where i was so intensely depressed and couldnt go outside in fear of my peers seeing me and thinking im weird or i look horrible and somedays couldnt even go to school without having a meltdown. But no. I was a joke to my friends and family. My parents still call me a snowflake when i talk about my friends, problems in the world, if im possibly neurodivergent.

Im scared if im not actually autistic. What if this is just me and theres nothing. What if this is just how my brain works and im just incapable of everything. Or what if i just cant read social cues and everybody just doesnt like me just because?

What if i dont have adhd and i just cannot focus and nothing can fit in my brain? What if i just cant sit still and i have to do something or Ill just explode.

What if i dont have ocd and my brain just needs everything in a certain way and if somebody touches something ill snap. What if my brain just makes up these images in my head of my parents or peers doing things to me or me doing things to them. Me killing people, raping people vice versa. What if i have to do things in fives just because?

Im scared nobody will ever take me seriously. Im scared if i talk to someone about this they’ll just tell me i have nothing wrong with me. Im scared just because i can make five seconds of eye contact (and i have to count to five) im not autistic. Just because my room isnt filled with a specific thing im not autistic. Because im terrible at maths and get bad grades im not autistic. Perhaps i do have adhd ? But ive been thinking i have autism since i was ?? God knows. But nobody did anything.

I was just a quirky kid who had a strange obsession with art ! With collecting dolls ! Putting them in lines by colour and fives ! An obsession with cats that i still have ! You know as a kid i would colour code all the dvds in the living room so much my dad had to sell them ? Too bad im collecting dvds myself now and colourcoding them again and again and again. Even when they’re already colour coded i do it again and again and again.

I was just a quirky kid who sat by herself at break time and lunch because every kid saw something about them that they didn’t see. They saw something in me straight away. Ive always been friends with only neurodivergent people my whole life. They were the only people who didnt see that. Or did they ? Did they subconsciously know i was one of them ? Some kids who werent neurodivergent kept me around sometimes but then would leave me, it didnt make sense. Up to my teenage years one of my best friends was neurotypical, we were compete opposites but i felt safe around her until i would talk about my interests in bands, cats and collecting things then shed go off to her other friends or change the subject or completely leave me in year 10. In year 10 i finally got friends that were neurodivergent and i felt home, i could talk about my interests without feeling like a burden, they were interested. Though i still couldnt read social cues if they were tired of me telling them about my cats origin story or how the nine lives theory came to be. They would still listen and be interested and ask me questions.

I need to tell someone these and get a formal diagnosis but im too scared theyll see me as a weirdo or strange. If j do get a diagnosis ill be so extremely happy because then i actually have something ! Id have something to tell people why im like this, this is why im like this this js me !!!!! This is why you bullied me relentlessly for no reason !!!!!

I need this so bad. I need to stop blaming myself.

0 notes

your-dietician · 2 years

Text

’Constant adventure’: Why digital nomadism attracts people with ADHD

New Post has been published on https://medianwire.com/constant-adventure-why-digital-nomadism-attracts-people-with-adhd/

’Constant adventure’: Why digital nomadism attracts people with ADHD

Hannah Dixon had always considered herself “eccentric”.

“I felt like I couldn’t do certain things that others around me seemed to do effortlessly.”

Travelling, on the other hand, came easily to her. She has been a digital nomad for over 12 years, living and working in 58 countries.

It wasn’t until COVID-19 lockdowns provided ample time for self-reflection that she realised she might have ADHD and sought a diagnosis.

“Suddenly, my world and experiences to date began to make sense. It was very freeing!”

Hannah quickly realised that she was far from the only person in her location-independent community to be neurodivergent.

“When I meet someone, I often get this feeling of ‘Hey, you’re like me!'” she says.

Why does the digital nomad lifestyle attract neurodivergency?

I have had a similar experience since I became a digital nomad. I have ADHD, and for the first time in my life, I feel like I am a part of a neurodivergent majority. Many of my nomad friends have been diagnosed with ADHD, and others with autism. Plenty more report having the symptoms without a formal diagnosis.

“This lifestyle attracts people who don’t fit in the box that society has prescribed,” says Kit Whelan, who has been a nomad for over a decade.

“It draws in all sorts of people who go against the norms, and that includes neurodivergent folks.”

Before the pandemic, Kit moved around every three to six weeks.

“It was so refreshing. So invigorating.”

Once she had been diagnosed with ADHD, she realised that “the change and the stimulation were what kept my brain feeling like it was working at its best.”

People with ADHD tend to thrive in situations of chaos and constant change, making nomadic life ideal.

“There are always new people, or new places, or something else new to excite you. And that makes it easier to get through the more mundane parts of running a business,” says Kit.

For Hannah, being surrounded by an understanding community is also a significant advantage of being a digital nomad. “Having friends all over the world who implicitly ‘get you’ is highly rewarding,” she says.

What is neurodivergence?

The term neurodivergent broadly describes people whose brains function differently from what society considers as ‘typical’. It can include neurological or developmental conditions such as ADHD (attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder), dyslexia and autism spectrum disorder (ASD).

People with ADHD may experience difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness and impulsivity, according to UK mental health charity Mind. This can impact behaviour, mood and thinking.

Nomadic living acts as ‘self medication’ for people with ADHD

Psychologist Sonia Jaeger specialises in internationally mobile patients, from nomads to expats, and she remarks on the high rates of neurodivergence in these communities.

“In a way, nomadic living is like a positive incarnation of ADHD traits, such as impulsive decisions and risky behaviour,” she says. “You have constant adventure and new things happening all the time.”

She suggests that many people start travelling and looking for new experiences, then realise that maybe they are using it as “self-medication” and seek a diagnosis.

People whose minds work in an atypical way often struggle to fit into a “normal” lifestyle, with a 9-to-5 office job and sedentary social life.

Digital nomadism appears to be providing an alternative which neurodivergent individuals can adapt to their needs, says Jaeger.

In fact, one of the great things about the nomadic lifestyle is that there is no one-size-fits-all.

“It is usually more flexible than sedentary life. It can be more adapted to your needs, which is a good thing no matter what kind of mental health issue you might have”.

Rather than being forced to adapt to a structure that was not built with neurodivergence in mind, life on the road offers endless ways to adapt your environment and work schedule to your needs and preferences.

As Jaeger says, “It’s a neurodivergent dream to have all these options.”

There is currently no data on the rates of neurodivergence amongst digital nomads, but Kit is trying to change this. She has launched an online survey to understand this issue better.

“By looking deeper into the connection between the nomad community and the neurodivergent community, we can start to come up with ideas of how neurodivergent people can thrive,” she says.

Read full article here

0 notes

falcqns · 2 years

Text

Wikipedia: Rhea Pitt

Rhea Stella Pitt (born January 22nd, 2000) is an American actress and social media influencer. The daughter of Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt, she began acting at an early age with the role of Emma Geller in 'Friends'. Her first major film role came in the 2017 DCEU thriller 'Justice League'.

Pitt rose to international fame in late 2019, when she gained a large following on TikTok. Since graduating high school in 2018, she has been cast in big TV and Film projects such as the Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Fantastic Beasts franchise, and Netflix Original Series The Witcher, based on the fantasy books by Andrzej Sapkowski.

Early Life:

Pitt was born January 22nd, 2000, in Los Angeles California to actors Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt. Her ancestry is primarily Greek and English. Pitt has 6 half siblings, Shiloh Jolie-Pitt, Vivienne Jolie-Pitt, Maddox Jolie-Pitt, Knox Jolie-Pitt, Zahara Jolie-Pitt, and Pax Jolie-Pitt, all paternal half siblings, but maintains that they are still her siblings, regardless of parentage.

At age 4, Pitt began attending Crossroads School in Santa Monica, California. She remained at Crossroads until age 10 (2010), when she moved to Culver City, California, with her mother, and began attending The Willows Community School. Pitt remained enrolled until 2014, when she began attending Marymount High School in Los Angeles. When her mother was asked why she attended 3 different schools, Aniston said that "the schools were not willing to work with my daughter. They were not willing to give her the supports she needed, so we switched schools until I found those supports for her."

When Pitt was 5, she was diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Defecit Hyperactive Disorder), SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder), and GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder). At age 12, she entered testing for ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder), and received a formal diagnosis by age 15.

Also when she was 5, Pitt's parents, Aniston and Pitt, divorced. While custody forms are sealed with the divorce papers, a close contact to Pitt's father, Brad, stated that 'he had not seen Rhea since him and Jennifer split.' It has not been confirmed whether this is true, however.

In 2016, Pitt's father, Brad, mentioned in an interview that him and Pitt were on good terms, and that she has been visiting him regularly since 2012, and is very involved in her siblings lives, and loves them dearly.

In late 2016, Pitt's step mother, Angelina Jolie, filed for visitation rights with Rhea, as she felt Rhea was her daughter, regardless of blood relation. 2 months later, Jolie was granted visitation rights, and Pitt began to spend one weekend a month with Jolie.

In 2018, Pitt was accepted into UCLA and began studying Early Care and Education, in order to be an Early Childhood Educator. Rhea has said that while she has a huge passion for acting, she has an 'equally big, if not bigger, passion for children and teaching, and wanted something to fall back on should acting not work out.'

Career:

Rhea Pitt began her acting career at just 6 months old, playing Emma Geller in the hit sitcom 'Friends', the same show that sky-rocketed her mother to stardom. She played Emma until the show ended in 2004.

Pitt's second role was as Casey Mathis in her mothers movie, 'We're The Millers'. While another actor, Emma Roberts, was originally cast as Casey, Roberts dropped out due to unknown reasons, and Aniston suggested Rhea for the role after learning go the characters age change, from 20 to 14. The Los Angeles Times wrote "Pitt performs at such a caliber only expected from the child of such respected actors like Jennifer Aniston, Brad Pitt, and Angelina Jolie.'

After appearing in 'We're The Millers', Pitt took a break from acting as her mental health and grades were suffering.

In 2015, Rhea made a large comeback by appearing in Batman v Superman as Kara Zor-El, the cousin of Kal-El/Clark Kent. When Pitt was asked about her prep for this role, she said "I put myself through hell for that role, but I don't regret it one bit." Despite her role being quite big, she barely interacted with Henry Cavill, who plays Superman, and has stated that Henry forgot they were in the movie together, but are very good friends now.

In June of 2016, Rhea Pitt revived her role as Kara Zor-El in the 2017 DCEU movie, 'Justice League'. She filmed during her entire summer break, and finished in December, completing school with the help of a tutor, and her parents. Pitt received glowing reviews for her role as Kara, and was nominated - and later won - for Best Supporting Actress at the 2018 Emmy Awards at just 18 years old.

In 2018, Pitt played Donna Sheridan in 'Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again', the sequel to the hit musical 'Mamma Mia'. She was then cast as Andrea Prentiss, daughter of Emily Prentiss, in the final season of Criminal Minds that same year, which debuted in 2020.

In 2019, Rhea starred in season 2 of The Orville, written and produced by Seth MacFarlane, as Adela Grayson, the adoptive daughter of Kelly Grayson, played by Adrianne Palicki. When asked by Variety what she thought of almost constantly playing the daughter of the main character, she said "I love it. I love getting to be so many different people, in so many different worlds. I've been a daughter my whole life, and I love being a daughter, and I like to think that that bleeds into my acting."

April of 2019 also had Pitt announced into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, playing Laina Barton, the first non-comic book main character to be introduced into the MCU. She went on to play Laina in the Mockingbird movie which also saw Adrianne Palicki reprise her role of Barbara 'Bobbi' Morse, and Nick Blood as Lancelot 'Lance' Hunter.

2020 was a pivotal year for Pitt. She was cast in multiple projects, such as The Fantastic Beasts franchise (Ariana Dumbledore), Enola Holmes (Irene Adler), Doctor Strange and the Multiverse of Madness (Rikki Barnes), Knives Out 2 (Megan Wallace), The Witcher (character not announced), and Murdoch Mysteries (Ella Lyrica). Rhea expressed excitement over all of the roles, posting excitedly on her social media.

Personal Life:

College Admissions Scandal:

In March of 2019, the College Admissions Scandal came to light, and Pitt, as well as her parents were accused of participating.

It was later revealed that the family was accused because of Pitt's friendship with Olivia Jade. Pitt was temporarily suspended from UCLA, but was welcomed back a few weeks later when it was proven that her application and acceptance were genuine. Pitt has also stated that she is no longer friends with Olivia Jade.

Advocacy:

As previously mentioned, Pitt was diagnoses with ADHD, SPD, GAD, and ASD all by age 15. Pitt has spoken very little about this, and has stated that she feels her parents are better educated on the processes of diagnosis, but does not support Autism Speaks, and has been proven to donate a portion of her earnings to the Doug Flutie Jr. Foundation for Autism, and Organization for Autism Research.

One of Rhea's childhood friends, Raeni Walmsley, has stated openly that "it didn't matter who you were, whether you were friends with her or not, and even whether she liked you or not. If she heard or saw you being criticized or discriminated for anything, she would go to war for you." Henry Cavill, her DCEU and Witcher co star has stated something similar, saying "Rhea is the one of the nicest humans I have ever come across. She is so welcoming, and warm, and supportive. The first things she asks her fans when she meets them is 'what are your pronouns?' so she can be as welcoming as possible, and I adore that about her."

Relationships:

While Pitt has not always been in the spotlight, she has had quite a few relationships with public figures.

She met Francesco Yates in 2016, when she was 16, and Yates was 17, almost 18. The two dated off and on until Yates turned 19. There is no information of the cause of the split, but an unconfirmed source close to the ex couple has said that the age gap and distance was putting a strain on the relationship.

Pitt was briefly rumoured to be dating YouTuber Daniel Howell (formerly danisnotonfire) but has remained that they were just 'good friends' and has shown tremendous support for Daniel and his partner Phil Lester (AmazingPhil) after they both came out publicly, and they are still friends.

When Pitt was 17, she was confirmed to be dating Henry Danger star Jace Norman, who was also 17 at the time. The two lasted for a little over a year, before deciding they would be better off friends, and are still very close to this day.

In 2019, she began dating Peyton Meyer (Girl Meets World), but the two split after just a year and four months, when Meyer allegedly cheated. The two haven't spoken since.

In 2020, Rhea was rumoured to be dating Pete Davidson, but maintains that it was just a fling. She's also said that due to rumours spread by an 'old friend', they split up, and are not currently on speaking terms, despite Pitt saying she misses his friendship, but wishes him all the best, and respecting his wishes.

In 2021, Pitt began dating Noah Centineo. The two seemed to be in a loving and fun relationship, but Pitt explained there was 'a lot of jealousy', but did not clarify from who. The pair split in August of 2021, while Pitt was filming Knives Out 2.

In January of 2022, Pitt was confirmed to be dating 'Captain America' star, Chris Evans. It was confirmed when he posted on Instagram, wishing Pitt a happy birthday, and saying "I am so proud how far you've come in your career, and you continue to amaze me with your talent every day. I thank my lucky stars each day that you are mine, and you chose me to love you."

The two split briefly in May of 2022, with the reason being 'a significant loss in the family', but rekindled less than a month later, and announced their relationship and how they've grown at the end of May, and are still together, posting about each other regularly.

#following the seasons au #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x oc #chris evans smut #chris evans au #cevans #chris evans characters #chris evans headcanon #chris evans fluff

34 notes · View notes

actuallyadhd · 2 years

Note

Hi.. I was diagnosed with ASD last year and was tested for ADHD with a computerized test then. The test apparently said I don’t have ADHD so I wasn’t diagnosed but I felt like it may have been flawed (I FORCED myself to focus on the test because I was told to “do my best”) so I wanted to pursue testing with a different method. Recently my new therapist and my mother looked through the DSM criteria with me for ADHD and I marked all the inattentive symptoms as Yes, and 6 of the hyperactive as Yes until I get more info about them (ASD can make understanding written word tricky for me). Even though my parent and I were agreeing on the symptoms this seems surreal and I’m afraid I’ve been manipulative or lied somehow in order to come to this conclusion… like maybe I’m faking my way through it. But I can’t control how difficult it is for me to focus on things, the fact it takes me 2 weeks to get to folding laundry I intended to do way earlier, or the fact I continuously misplace things.. or anything else I deal with. Idk I guess I’m just wondering if it’s possible I’m faking all this… I’m afraid I’ve misled people somehow. You can ignore this if you need to tbh. Thanks for reading if you did.

Sent April 27, 2022

The fact that you’re worried you might be faking tells me that you probably aren’t. Might it be something other than ADHD? Sure, that’s a possibility. But you’re definitely struggling, and you definitely deserve help. If that means you need a formal diagnosis (that’s how we access medication and accommodations), then that’s what you need.

Now, a good thing to ask about is a full psychoeducational assessment. I had one done in 2010, and it was really helpful and interesting. One of the things I learned was that there’s a relatively common profile that turns up in ADHD. Basically, relative to your full IQ score, your processing speed and working memory will be lower than expected. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you will score below average on these two measures, it means that you will score below the range your IQ sits in. So, for example, if your IQ is over 120 and you score 110 or lower, that’s lower than expected and is a sign that you have a deficit in that area.

If it would help, I can try and put together a video about the criteria with examples of ways they might show up in someone’s life. It would go up on the Actually ADHD YouTube channel. If short-form is better for you, I can also split it into bite-sized TikToks.

Followers, what do you think about this? Also, would video information about diagnostic criteria be helpful?

-J

52 notes · View notes

arizona-trash-bag · 3 years

Note

I can totally explain a bit of my thinking behind seeing lwj as autistic and wwx as autistic/adhd!! Before I get into specifics though, let me preface with where I’m coming from. I first saw CQL and then read the EXR translation of the novel. I prefer MDZS to CQL, but also want to acknowledge that because I do not read/speak Mandarin I am inherently experiencing this story second-hand and therefore am probably missing out on a lot of nuances. I am trying to learn Mandarin, but it will be a long time before I am even a little close to fluent lol.

Another preface- obviously not all autistic people present in the same way, and many of the things that I will mention are not solely specific to autistic people either. It’s one of those things where all of it added up together points towards asd, but each one individually would not on its own indicate asd, you know? Also, I will say that many of the things I picked up on for both characters are autistic traits that many autistic people have vs the clinical characteristics (much like most of the case I could make for wwx’s adhd would be adhd traits he has rather than symptoms that would lead to a real-world diagnosis.) Edit: OH! I almost forgot to say, that also all of these traits I’m listing are from a western perspective, and I would LOVE to read more about how autism presents in different cultures and to see conversations between autistc Chinese people specifically, so as to see if these traits are specific to western autistic people or not, but again, I do not speak Mandarin or Cantonese or any other Chinese dialect, so that’s a little inaccessible for me atm.

Ok, SO, for both characters I would list: strong sense of justice, lack of care for society’s opinion (I feel like it could be argued that lwj does to a certain point, but imo he operates more from what he morally considers to be correct and from a place of familial duty vs catering to the opinion of society at large), and then more vaguely, they both seem to be “nerdy” (this doesnt feel like the most accurate term, especially because it's not like being scholarly is specific to their characters, especially in ancient fantasy China- it’s more that their particular hmmm, flavor?? of love of knowledge feels very neurodivergent to me, vs like, being scholarly because it’s the thing that is expected of a Young Master, if that makes any sense at all- like the difference btwn someone getting an engineering degree because it is expected of them vs because they genuinely love engineering), and lastly for both- I would say that they are canonically kinky, and while I can’t cite any statistics, there’s a pretty high correlation between being autistic and being into kink. Obviously, not every person who is not vanilla is autistic, and not every autistic person is into kink…….but there is a high correlation.

For lwj specifically, the things that made me think he might be autistic are his lack of outward emoting combined with his depth and breadth of emotions, how he seems to thrive in and quite enjoy the very structured environment he grew up in, and then the last one off the top of my head (side note, I feel like a week from now I’m going to randomly think of other examples lol) I’m not actually sure IS an example, because I know (thanks to the awesome post from hunxi that you linked to that I had read previously) that his succintness does not equal autism, but I do kind of feel like it is very autistic to Always be so formal and to Always talk in textbook perfect language.

For wwx, I also think he likely has CPTSD! I’m not going to list anything for adhd or cptsd since we both agree on those :) As far as being autistic goes, there is, of course, the high prevalence of adhd/asd comorbidity. For specifc traits- while autism can show up as lack of facial expressions/tone, it can also show up as being overly exuberant and overexpressive. Especially for younger autistic children this can show up as being overly friendly/no boundaries w/ strangers (just?? going home with a random man who says he knew wwx’s parents???), making unusual connections that others do not can be both asd and adhd, his disregard for social status (disregard might be a strong word, and also I feel like this might be one of those things that got lost in translation and if I had read the original text I might have a different opinon, but what I mean here is the way that often autistic people learn certain social rules and try their best to follow them, but often do not pick up on specifics related to social hierarchy that are not spelled out for them- I think jyl’s take down of jin zixun is a great example of the /oppossite/ of what I’m talking about, and is a very neurotypical interaction. An example also of what I mean by disregard for social hierarchy, but from my own life, is how I’ve reflected on past convos w/ my boss only to realize that what I thought was just an interesting conversation about our opinons on a particular subject was actually them trying to tell-me-as-my-boss something they wanted me to do. We ended up doing things the way I wanted to do them because I didn’t realize that they were telling me to do something because they didnt explicitly say so, and because I just don’t pick up on when people are saying something from a social hierarchy pov. Idk if this makes sense or not, so I’m happy to try to expand if you would like me to. I feel like wwx could be described as having alexithymia, which is very common in autistic people, but could also be due to his cptsd. And then, I don’t feel like this is a true point because it is kind of based on headcanon? but wwx feels very demisexual to me, which is much more common for autistic people than it is for allistic people. But him being demi is not canon, just my perception of him (I see him as demisexual gay w/ massive comphet, but I know lots of people see him as bi, which also totally makes sense!!)

Tbh, I’m having a harder time than I thought I would listing wwx specifics. I might go through the book sometime this weekend and see if there are specific moments that pop out at me, but tbh w/ him its more that he Feels very adhd/asd to me?? Idk, I was diagnosed w/ adhd when I was 8, and all 4 of my siblings plus my father have offical adhd diagnoses. I’m 29 now and was only diagnosed as autistic earlier this year. All of my close friends have always been either adhd, asd, or adhd/asd. There have been multiple people I have met that I’ve suspected were neurodivergent who have later told me they started looking into it and are now seeking formal diagnoses. I mention these things, only to give full context when I say that I have spent a lot of time observing the differences between interacting with neurotypicals and neurodivergents. I mean, obviously, it’s possible that I could just be projecting, but to me, Wwx gives off late-diagnosed/heavy masker autism/adhd combo vibes. Again, maybe I am projecting, but I did try to analyze whether I was or not previously, and determined that since in the past with other favorite characters (who I probably share more similarities in personality with) I did not feel like they were neurodivergent, so I figured that probably I wasn’t? That feels like a very convoluted sentence, but what I mean is that I have not thought that about other characters who have been my fav, so I figured that while I do project in certain areas that this particular area probably wasn’t one of them. Or, to say it in yet another way, since i did not project any of my neurodivergencies on past favorite characters, I figured I probably didn’t start doing so now.

I would love to hear more of your perspective on this, particularly because I worry that I do not have the cultural touchstones to realize when something wwx or lwj is doing is not actually a sign of being neurodivergent. I try my best to research things I don’t know about and to listen to fans who actually do have that cultural understanding, but there’s only so much I can look into on my own when I only speak/read english. And also, I love mdzs and I love talking about both adhd and autism, so I’m glad to talk about these subjects with someone else who also likes all of those topics :) Sorry for sending a book of a response and also I hope you are having a great day!!

wow wow wow anon THANK YOU for doing your research and acknowledging your blind spots you seriously made my day. I wanted to get to this as soon as I made that rant while sharing cyan’s post bc this is specifically an example of a well researched proposition based on actual lived experience and critical thinking.

I almost want to ask you to come forward so we can take this convo elsewhere for a more nuanced discussion bc you’ve already hit upon an issue that’s been holding me back from making a big blathering masterpost on the matter - that the ND experience is so unique and individual, and no one person can dictate someone else’s experience. at the end of the day, if you personally relate to these characters and gain more understanding of yourself and your experiences from them, who am I to take that away from you?

in a public space though I have to make the discussion very broad in order to accurately contextualize these issues, bc in typical autistic fashion I feel morally compelled to Do My Best and Get It Right even as the masses show no inclination of returning the favor, so apologies for the boring backstories I have to get out of the way before we can approach anything resembling new ground.

first from a diagnostic standpoint, while I recognize the traits you listed (and appreciate your clearly nuanced understanding of ND expressions) and would find value in exploring them in a personal context, they are not unique to adhd and/or autism and wouldn’t constitute a basis for diagnosis in a clinical setting. I know that's probably beside the point for this anon, but there's enough edgy teens hoarding labels out there without tacit encouragement from scientists (yes I am technically a scientist, even though my ideologies these days range from conventional to... wildly esoteric, shall we say)

from a cultural standpoint, it’s important for me to emphasize that the concept of neurodivergence is a uniquely western notion. for those unfamiliar, the term 'neurodiversity' was only coined in 1998. I was born in 1991. I existed for a whole 7 years as an autistic person before the idea of being neurodivergent was even a thing. this ND acceptance thing is very, very new - people were not making tiktok confessionals about their adhd diagnosis journeys when I was growing up.

china, like most asian countries, is about 20 years or more behind on just about every social issue compared with western countries. to better illustrate, the experience of being ND in china falls much closer to the conventional experience of disability (i.e. being eugenicized out of existence) than the tentative ND acceptance movement that’s been kickstarted in the past 20 years in the anglosphere.

safe to say, there is no ND coding going on in chinese media. characters are either explicitly ND or they're not. there's no basis for a creator subtly inducing ND-like traits in a character, because there's no such thing as ND awareness in the cultural context of where mdzs was written and consumed. any resemblance is purely accidental, as they say.

as to how this resemblance could exist - I could go into the layers and layers of historical, cultural, social and religious context that make up these characters and the xianxia genre as a whole. for this anon in particular i'm happy to, because they've done the work. please please get in touch in some way where we can have a fully fleshed out chat if you're interested in taking this further, I realize i’ve basically addressed none of the finer points you’ve raised but honestly it’s another level of discussion to be had that cannot be summarized in one blog post haha.

as for those who would scream 'but special interests!!' at a character whose sect was founded by a literal monk - what would be the point?

PS. to comprise a starting point for why it's possible to see ND4ND everywhere in media if you looked hard enough - I refer you to the seminal red oni blue oni trope 💁‍♀️

#neurodivergence #neurodiversity #actuallyautistic #autism #adhd #danmei #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #mdzs #lan wangji #wei wuxian

11 notes · View notes

it-really-do-be-venting-time · 3 years

Text

Okay so here’s the situation, I am diagnosed with nonverbal learning disability ( nld ) however I’ve noticed that I’ve been doing what many refer to as stimming since I was at least in 7th grade ( that’s the earliest I recall thinking about my hands moving when I talk or my leg bouncing and so on ) and this is one of the main differences between asd ( autistic spectrum disorder ) and nld, I also have been diagnosed with anxiety, Tourette’s, adhd, depression, dysgraphia and Excoriation disorder ( excessive picking of the skin, often associated with ocd ) all of these have been formally diagnosed as well as had medication recommended or prescribed ( I currently take Ritalin, Ativan, Zoloft, clonidine and risperidone) and I’m wondering if this is a classic case of someone who has autism getting multiple diagnosis’s that all apply to asd symptoms. I was born and still identify and present as female which has an impact on asd diagnosis, I am 18 years old and I’m wondering if anyone else thinks I should seek an asd diagnosis or if I should just continue on with my life, I’m currently in post secondary and since nld is a learning disability I already get accommodations, I’d love some advice if anyone has any, I know I was also quite sensitive to sensory problems as a child, I’d cry around bright lights or fireworks even at a older age ( 8-10 ) and I could wear certain fabrics or articles of clothing, I also shaved my head as brushing my hair caused a lot of sensory distress as a kid and I couldn’t handle it, anyways I’d love to hear what others think, should I seek a diagnosis or should I just remain with my nonverbal learning disability / other neurological diagnoses ?

23 notes · View notes

aspidities · 3 years

Note

Hi! I'm listening to the podcast you were on with Ayaka Spencer and I had to come ask- you're autistic too :DDDD?

Maybe! My mother never wants to acknowledge that I share a lot of traits with ASD, specifically my interests and stimulation issues. I think, like a lot of moms from the 90s, she felt children were being over diagnosed and over prescribed, so even though I have a lot of similarities with a close childhood friend who is on the spec, my mom maybe deliberately ignored that. It doesn’t help that I’ve learned and adopted a lot of pro-social behavior—which is a common female adaptive trait for those with ASD—so my mother always hand waved my concerns when I was a kid with ‘no, you’re popular, you can’t have autism’.

Now, as an adult, I’ve had a few therapists acknowledge these traits and I’ve been diagnosed with fun complimentary things like ADHD and generalized anxiety, but, either from stigma from my mother’s reticence or lack of personal time, I’ve never pursued a formal ASD diagnosis. So perhaps it was flippant of me to describe myself that way, and I apologize if it comes off like that, truly. I’ve grown used to thinking of myself as already diagnosed but that’s a common Internet psychosis.

I do think it’s largely more than possible, though.

#ask me #about me #personal #podcast

5 notes · View notes

thesaltyace · 3 years

Text

big rant/ramble below, you can safely ignore and move on to the next post in your feed.

Urgh

I shared the results of that autism screener with a quasi-friend who I thought would be "safe" (we used to work together and we connected over his being gay and me being visibly queer) but his response was blergh

Everyone has hints of autism.

okay yeah but this isn't just *hints* of autism. I'm answered yes to symptoms I've had since I was a kid that I've learned to mask or work around as an adult. But I still struggle with them.

He pointed out that he sees me as more ADHD than ASD.

Yeah, fair, and I'd need to see a professional to try to distinguish if my symptoms are ADHD, ASD, or both.

You don't hit the three prongs needed for a diagnosis.

But.... but I do. And the stuff I dealt with as a kid is still stuff I deal with today. I just mask it better. A short and not exhaustive list:

As I kid I had trouble interacting with peers. I didn't have friends, really. I didn't know how to make friends and I didn't try terribly hard to. I acquire friends when someone else "adopts" me and decides that we are friends. And once I became an adult, I have almost never had friends of my own - I share a friend group with my spouse who we're primary connected to through him. I'm okay with that. Maintaining a friendship entirely on my own power sounds impossible and exhausting.

I was okay with not having friends, I liked being alone, but my mom insisted on me being social. She made me join things so that I would have a list of people to invite to parties. I'd honestly have preferred a day of doing stuff I like or just a couple friends. As an adult, I want to be alone on my birthday. I will celebrate with certain friends, separately, usually over a quiet meal. That's it.

I had trouble understanding sarcasm and figurative speech. Like, I understand it now but I still think most figurative speech is annoying. I've been told the way I deliver sarcasm is weird, too.

I liked memorizing movies and quoting them start to finish, I thought it was fun but everyone else thought it was weird. I continued to do this into adulthood but I only quote aloud when I'm alone. Alamo Drafthouse quote-alongs are the BEST. I don't do this with every movie, either, just ones I really like.

Okay actually I also liked to listen to the same album or, in some cases, the same song over and over until I was sick of it (and sometimes even after that point). I mean, just endlessly looping on repeat. Not interspersed with other songs. I do this as an adult a LOT because it's easier with headphones to do this without annoying everyone else around you. Like, often it's fine for me to just put a playlist on shuffle, but I get into Moods where I just want the one album/song over and over. Yesterday I listened to Wellerman about 50 times in a row and only stopped because I had to get up and do something else and that song wasn't "good" for whatever I got up to do.

My special interest as a kid was cats. Literally everything cats, all the time - I sought out obscure facts and could tell you the difference between similar species, and wanted cats involved in literally everything I did. Adults laughed it off as childhood obsession. I was also pretty obsessed with the solar system. I thought asking my peers, as a trivia question, which of Jupiter's moons had its own asteroid (Io, in case you were wondering) was appropriate and interesting and was confused that they didn't know that. That was in fifth grade.

I watched the weather channel for fun. I would watch it for hours and absorb the weekly forecast info just... for fun? I never used it, could never tell you if you should dress a certain way or bring an umbrella or whatever. Everyone thought it was weird.

I was a know-it-all and literally could not stop myself from bluntly correcting people who were wrong. Didn't know or care that it was "rude". I'm still that way but I've learned how to sometimes swallow the urge long enough to find a more tactful way to point it out (but often fail).

I could read on my own before kindergarten, used vocabulary beyond what one would expect for my age, and had a special interest in spelling and grammar throughout my school years. I did not understand how other people weren't interested in learning about it and getting it right. I read at an undergrad level by 4th grade.

I hated loud noises and often covered my ears to block out irritating sounds. I could also hear high pitched noises that even other kids didn't seem to hear (or at least weren't bothered by them). Too much noise sent me into an internal meltdown, I'd just kinda shut down because I couldn't deal with it.

Textures and pressure on my skin bothered the absolute fuck out of me - sock seams, certain fabric materials, socks that weren't equally elastic, one shoe tighter than the other, tags.... all of that. (Also, fun anecdote I just unlocked - when I was 4 or 5 my grandmother started letting me use the soft silk sleep shirt she had as a young woman because I preferred it to anything else. Soft, smooth, no irritating qualities. Bliss. I wanted to wear it all the time.)

Don't get me started on food. Until I was in COLLEGE I mostly subsisted on pasta with either butter or alfredo sauce and chicken. I would eat other things, but pasta and/or chicken was (and still is) my biggest safe/comfort food. I'd eat other stuff mostly if I could control the balance of ingredients, get it made plain, or could confirm the texture wouldn't be offensive (so, like... plain burgers, plain cheese pizza, grilled cheese, mashed potatoes, etc.) I cannot stress this enough - from childhood through COLLEGE I did this. As a kid my mom had to make me a completely separate dish most nights to get me to eat something. My spouse was horrified at what little variety I ate. The only reason I eat so much variety now is that he knows what I do/don't like and tells me in advance if I'll find a texture or taste offensive. Of course, rather than wanting consistent texture like I did when I was younger, I now seek as much texture as possible (so long as they aren't Bad textures) so.... that's fun. But yeah most of my objections to Yucky foods is due to T E X T U R E. Even if I like the taste, the texture overrides it all.

I prefer animals to people. I will seek out animals and interact with them instead of people in the same room. And will pointedly focus on the animal to avoid interacting with people.

I'm perfectly happy with only myself for company. Being with just my spouse counts as me being "alone" though. Always has. I just realized last night that it's because I do minimal to no masking around him because he's a safe person to unmask with and always has been. Never batted an eye at the weird shit I do beyond asking questions about what I was doing or why. And then just "Okay."

Okay honestly just the fact that I want to vent into the void of tumblr instead of actually discussing this with a person - even my spouse! - pretty effectively shows how little it occurs to me to interact with other people directly. o_0

And there are so many more things that I won't list here because I could just go on and on. And like, sure, some of this may certainly overlap with ADHD but my point is that I have enough to point to ASD that it doesn't feel like having a "hint" of autism. And who knows - maybe it is mostly just ADHD and CPTSD stuff interacting in weird ways. Could be!

But just because I can make small talk and make eye contact and do the "normal" shit and I can interact "normally" doesn't mean I LIKE it. I had to LEARN to do those things to avoid having bad social interactions. When I'm by myself or with my spouse, I behave very differently than I do around anyone else. ANYONE. It's not just slightly changing my behavior depending on who I'm with - it's completely suppressing how I naturally would do things if left to my own devices.

Like, the things we recommended to our autistic students who wanted to know how to interact in ways that would help them blend in/be accepted by others ARE THE EXACT THINGS I ALREADY DO. Like, it did not occur to me at the time that neurotypicals literally do not have to think about doing those things. I thought, ah, these students just need to be told what the tricks are. Other people figure these tricks out on their own. It did not occur to me that other people, in fact, do not learn these tricks because they naturally do that behavior. They do not have to actively think about learning the trick, period. I literally thought other people also have to think as hard as I do about interactions. Evidently not.

So yeah, I'm feeling a little upset about the reaction I got from him because I'm like.... honestly, a diagnosis of ASD wouldn't change a lot about how I do things or think of things. But it would make me feel better about interacting with and participating in autism-related stuff if I am actually autistic. I realize I can use the resources and supports meant for ASD regardless, and for formal supports anything I can access due to my ADHD diagnosis likely covers anything I'd need for ASD. But having a diagnosis opens up more community. Right now I'm like yeah I'm ADHD but I totally relate to this ASD content. But I'm not going to interact much because I feel like I don't have the right to join in since idk if I do have ASD.

idk I have a lot of feelings. I had a bad email about the trans insurance coverage thing yesterday and I'm not in a great headspace, but finding out me and my spouse both scored very high on the autism screening stuff was honestly a high point because we ended up sharing a lot of how we view and interact with the world that was very eye-opening about why we interact the way we do, how we relate to others (and how other people think we're weird for how we relate to others), and just...everything. And having someone be skeptical after I've spent a lot of time trying to convince myself that I DON'T have ASD only to conclude that at the very least, I should probably be evaluated because I can't reasonably rule it out. Like, most people do not wonder if they have autism. The fact that I am spending this much time looking into it and trying to find examples to disprove it only to find I overwhelmingly can't in virtually every single diagnostic category.... just..... dismissing it outright is kinda hurtful.

Like, I recognize that ADHD symptoms overlap a fair bit, but seriously. My spouse (who definitively does not have ADHD) scored almost identically to me and we vibed on almost everything when we compared answers. We see most things similarly. We have similar areas of confusion about other people and for fundamentally similar reasons. I can't imagine all of the stuff that points to ASD for me is just ADHD in disguise, not when I vibe THAT HARD with someone else. Spouse does not vibe with me on ADHD content. At all. He can appreciate it since he does live with me, after all, and observes whatever's being discussed. But he doesn't vibe with it. He vibes with autism content, though. And I vibe with both.

idk this rant ended in rambling and I'm just going to go listen to Inside on repeat for a couple hours while I try to calm down a bit. o_0

#rant over #for now #I've actually been listening to Inside for the last twenty minutes already lol #maybe I'll try to nap #idk #blergh #yay Shit is playing now and I'm like LOL cause I did wake up at 11:30 feeling like shit #woot #what a bop #I'm like hell yeah you get it #let's vibe

1 note · View note

firjii · 4 years

Text

Boomers are autistic/ADHD too

Yanno what I’m just saying it and maybe I’ll get called a traitor or whatever but that doesn’t stop this from being a distinct possibility: there’s a lot of untreated, undiagnosed, unacknowledged ADHD and autism among boomers. I notice it every single day and I can’t believe more people don’t talk about it.

Stay with me because this gets long.

They didn’t know shit for shit about the brain when boomers were children. Hyper or “disobedient” children were beaten or given some other utterly useless and frequently detrimental punishment. Institutionalization was considered totally acceptable in moderately severe autism cases. Therapy as we know it was typically reserved for people who were so cripplingly traumatized in some way that there was literally no other choice. It was usually damage control after the fact, not intervention.

Yes, autism and ADHD have some form of research history spanning several centuries, but your average regular person didn’t know that (and still doesn’t always, since the 20th century is often egregiously known as the century of “new” medical “fads”). Your average doctor didn’t necessarily know about it. It was a relatively fringe topic, so not all psychiatrists/psychologists learned it because it was a blip (or nothing) on the syllabus unless maybe you were specializing in children or developmental disabilities (and there......really weren’t a lot of either such specialist up to a certain point :///).

Everyone else affected by it but deemed functional or marriable enough to try living in the world just dealt with it, for better and worse. Many of the blatantly obvious signs we now use for diagnosis were lumped in as a personality type/trait at best or an intelligence marker at worst.

And I get where that comes from......sort of. Brian is a persistently loud talker, Amy is deeply claustrophobic, Sam gets nervous easier than some other people, Alex needs a tiny bit more time to hand copy an address. Who is ND on closer investigation? Maybe all, maybe none. You can show a few signs without them being part of a big dire diagnosis conspiracy. Far be it for me to try to call someone something they’re not.

But given how many people are disregarded or misdiagnosed in general for anything medically-related whatsoever, it’s too easy to use that line of thought to dismiss a legitimate case or just plain avoid a problem.

Some affected boomers thrived and found careers that valued (and even normalized!!) hyperfocusing, attention to detail, channeled hyperactivity, etc. (LOOKIN AT YOU, COMPUTER ENGINEERS AND VARIOUS TECHIE INVENTORS). Some of them had/have somewhat chaotic or strained home lives, but for all intents and purposes, they do or have done at least some of what they wanted to in life.

But many others didn’t. Think about all the kids who were called “unteachable” so they barely finished high school (for fuck’s sake it was hard to even get humane tutoring for dyslexia), could barely ever keep a job, and in some cases weren’t truly prepared for having kids because they struggled to take care of themselves as it was.

Think about the stay-at-home moms who turned into lowkey addicts or alcoholics to escape feelings of uselessness/insignificance simply because sometimes they forgot to or couldn’t do something that day and everyone around them shamed them about all those little things for years or decades. We like to joke about yuppy drunks (and yes that was/is a real problem), but it wasn’t always about disgusting social habits.

Many of that generation blames the problems they’re dealing with right now on age, and that’s a close enough approximation in practice that a lot of people don’t dispute it. To be fair, age does really do that shit to people: you forget things easier, you can’t always finish a task but you’re not sure why, you don’t always have the energy you want/need, etc. Sometimes age is just age.

But I remember differently. I remember seeing those things because I was dealing with them too and couldn’t understand why the grownups were so upset at themselves when actually mistake XYZ wasn’t really a huge crisis and wasn’t a big deal – because there were double standards, both external and self-imposed. No one questioned them much with me – a small child at the time – but they were a big shitting deal when it came to an outwardly functional adult. I remember all the oddities, quirks, and problems that these people were dealing with as young as their late 30s in some cases.

That’s not age, it’s a goddamn brain issue. Age is now complicating things, yes. But so many want to pretend that they were completely normal before they turned 50 or 60 or whatever, at which point they promptly and swiftly had an overnight change. That’s not fair to anyone. It’s emotionally ruthless and medically sloppy, and yet a lot of them go on believing it anyway.

I genuinely feel that this is a reason why some boomers are so baffled or disbelieving of ND issues in their own kids and their kids’ kids. They can sometimes see younger generations’ problems in their own lives and even relate to them, but they’re so used to it – and in many cases, got zero help in learning how to manage it – that they don’t get what the big deal is about shoehorning people into miserable, unhealthy, or borderline hazardous life patterns. They assume that the massive struggle, intense frustration, and subsequent other negative health side effects are just….part of life and you either sink or swim.

And I…....kinda get that mentality because putting stock in “no excuses” does push some people to do better?? And yes you should be mindful of self-imposed excuses stopping you from doing things??

But now that overall lack of acknowledgement means that we have multiple generations who still default to believing that most of their problems are solely voluntary and conscious decisions, always and exclusively their own fault, something that they “could” just walk away from forever if they “chose” to.

We have multiple generations who still assume that they’re alone in their problems and even that they kind of deserve shitty or abusive behavior from others because they’re “bad” and “should have seen it coming” or “need to smarten up.”

We have children and grown-ass adults alike who are totally unprepared to deal with lifelong problems on top of things like broken economies and increasingly demanding neurotypicals’ social standards (because yeah, even though us younger folks warmly welcome things like the shift from calling to texting, that can still reach absurd levels of maintenance and anxiety because now the older generations assume that just because a few people are extremely “with it” that the rest of us are too).

And all because some people are so terrified of labels that they’re also willing to totally deny the existence of some very real medical stuff even though they themselves might be dealing with it.

I’m not trying to excuse crappy parents, bad home environments, bad education experiences, or anything else negative. I’m also not trying to blame all of psychology’s faults on one generation.

I’m just saying that it’s not that surprising if you really stop and think about it.

Psychology and neurology have come a long way in a fairly short time (granted it still needs to go much further, but at least we’ve started) and it kinda makes you wonder if things would be different now if our parents and grandparents had known then what we know now.

ASD doesn’t have an age limit. Just because it’s close to impossible for some people (especially borderlines and maskers) to get a formal diagnosis once they’re legal adults doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist at 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, or 80. It’s more a question of whether anyone bothers to, well...ask questions.

So yes, some people are just unapologetic assholes who don’t want to hear the truth or entertain any notions other than their own, even after being presented with hard evidence. They’re obsessed with normality, sometimes to the point of fetishization. Fuck them entirely, I agree.

But don’t assume that the younger generations own the copyright on neurodivergency. We just happen to live in a time when it’s starting to be less deniable so some of us can take action sooner to deal with it.

#asd #autism #adhd #adult autism #boomers #adult adhd #generational problems #baby boomer generation #boomers vs millenials #boomers vs gen z

50 notes · View notes

adhd-asd · 4 years

Note

Hello. I've been diagnosed with ADHD for nine years of my life but there's been this thought that I might have autism around for as long since a friend of my mother's who works in psychology and knows about these things has seen my test and said "this looks like the test of someone with asperger's" these days (in my early 20s) autism would explain some of the behavior I can't explain with ADHD but I'm very scared to bring it up with any doctors. I can't tell you what I'm scared of only that I am

I can’t tell you what you’re scared of, either, but I can tell you what I was scared of when I was trying to get an ASD evaluation. I was scared that the results would come back saying I was wrong and the answers I thought I had found would suddenly vanish. I was scared I’d be back to struggling to understand myself and I was terrified of the idea of going back to the way things were before.

I was scared that I was making a big deal out of nothing and wasting everyone’s time and that I really was just weird and lazy after all. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to articulate myself correctly and that I’d be misunderstood and that someone on either side would make a mistake, or that the person I was speaking to would challenge me or just wouldn’t care. Doctors can be very intimidating, especially when they have the power to change your life forever.

It’s not a personal failing to be scared and the way you choose to deal with it is entirely up to you. Nothing says you have to speak to a doctor or pursue an evaluation; if you’re happy with things as they are and want to continue life with just the one diagnosis and never bring ASD up in a professional setting then that’s an option. You may find that learning more about ASD and its coping methods without a formal evaluation is enough for you.

The process of figuring yourself out and then getting diagnosed by a professional can be exhausting, and if you feel you’ve done enough already and are intimidated at the prospect of going through even more, that’s more than fair. The point of a diagnosis is to help you and if it’s all stress with no benefit, that’s not very helpful at all. Sometimes, not putting ourselves through a difficult situation really is the more beneficial choice. Perseverance is admirable, but so is awareness of your needs and limits.

If, on the other hand, you think speaking with a professional about ASD would be beneficial for you, I’d encourage you to give it your best shot. Personally, I wasn’t able to make peace with the possibility of having ASD/ADHD or peace with myself until I received both diagnoses, and while the process was very difficult, the results have been life changing.

If you want to bring it up with your doctor but are afraid to, you may have an easier time writing your thoughts down rather than trying to speak off the top of your head. I personally benefited significantly from preparing a list of symptoms and some articles I wanted to talk about ahead of time. Having something concrete to refer to made navigating through my thoughts much easier, but you could go so far as just writing a letter and handing it to your doctor to read if you'd like.

And if you do decide to bring it up with a doctor, don’t feel pressured to overexert yourself and share everything all at once. Maybe you’d prefer to start by just asking a few questions about ASD or asking if they can refer you to someone who would be able to discuss it in more detail with you. You can start small and work your way up to a more serious discussion, and you don’t have to commit to anything if you change your mind at any point. Go at your own pace, in your own way, just make sure that whatever decision you make is the one that prioritises your needs, whatever they are.

Someone else has previously sent an ask expressing fear over being wrong about their ADHD, which you can find here if you’d like to see my response. You may find it helpful if you struggle with similar concerns. Otherwise, I hope this was able to offer you some sense of peace or direction. Best of luck with whatever you choose, and I hope you can take comfort in the fact that you’re not alone.

#Brady Answers #asd #actually autistic #adhd #actually adhd #tips #long post

34 notes · View notes