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notsoattractivearenti · 7 months

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Start of A New Life (Christian Pulisic x Fem!Reader)

WC: 4.3K

Warnings: pregnancy, childbirth descriptions, slight mentions of difficulty concieving

A/N: dad!christian for you all!!! this is so not proofread lol. hope you guys enjoy and i’d love to hear your thoughts thru ask/reply/reblog 💗 apologies for any errors! feedbacks are highly appreciated 🤍

—

Two red lines. “Pregnant - 2-3 weeks”. Another two red lines.

My heart suddenly skips a beat. My hands start shaking and I feel a gasp just leave my mouth. I can’t believe what I’m seeing right now. Is this real? I thought to myself. I have to take another look at all three pregnancy tests that I’m holding on both of my hands just to make sure I didn’t see them wrong and of course, nothing changed. Tears start to fall from my eyes, I am on cloud nine knowing a mini me – or my husband – is growing inside me. It’s happening… It’s really happening!

—

Christian and I have always wanted children of our own, and we have been trying for a baby for more than a year. We are well aware that not everyone will get pregnant as soon as they start trying, but honestly, at some point it can be exhausting and painful during the period. We had gone to the doctor, got ourselves checked up and luckily no issues were found, so the doctor just suggested we keep trying and be patient. There were times when we were so close to giving up – I was sick of seeing negative results over and over again – but we reminded ourselves that if it’s meant to be, it will happen when it happens and there are couples who have been trying to conceive way longer than us and still haven't succeeded.

I used to constantly apologize to Christian whenever I got a negative result on the pregnancy test because I felt like the problem was me and I was afraid I could never give him a child – I truly wanted to fulfill one of his lifelong dreams: becoming a father. And every single time Christian would tell me to stop apologizing to him and quit being hard on myself because it was never my fault. I knew he felt disappointed to see a single red line instead of two, but like always, he cared a lot more about my feelings. He never failed to comfort me during those times and would go out of his way just to make me feel better – and I am forever grateful to have such a loving and supportive partner for the rest of my life.

—

Christian has been in training since this morning – shortly before I found out I’m pregnant – so I decided to plan a special, little way to reveal the grand, long-awaited news before he goes home. I really cannot wait to see his reaction and I’m “positive” it’s going to be the sweetest thing ever. Since he transferred to his new club, he usually comes home from training feeling all happy and pumped up – imagine how he will be when he finds out he’s going to be a dad! My man may not be the most expressive person in the world, but I know no matter how little he would show his emotion on the surface, he is going to feel immense happiness deep inside his heart.

I searched through Pinterest for some references and after a while, I finally made up my mind. I don’t necessarily have good eyes on aesthetics and stuff so I just go for a simple way. I go look for some adorable little pregnancy announcement onesies, a gift box, and a few small decorative pieces so it would at least look cute and pleasing. I arrange the “present” as soon as I get home, put the box on the kitchen counter, and write a note on the outside – it says: “For my special man ♥ ps: no question asked! ;)”.

A few hours later, he finally comes home.

“Y/N, sweetheart, I’m home!”

Usually, I would come to him at the front door, greet him back and we would start sharing about each other’s days. But this time, I’m pretending not to hear him and make myself look busy in the kitchen – even though Christian and I actually cleaned the entire kitchen last night. To be honest, the reason I’m doing this is to cover my nervousness. I know he’s going to be excited but a little part of me worries he would change his mind about having a child after so many failed “attempts”.

“Y/N?” He sounds confused.

He then goes around the house looking for me before eventually finding me in the kitchen. I can hear his footsteps but I keep pretending like I am completely unaware of him. He comes over to me and hugs me from behind, and greets me with kisses – and of course, I act surprised when he does that.

“Hey baby, did you not hear me?”

His raspy, gentle voice gives me chills. It never fails to make me feel weak on my knees. But for now, I have to keep my act together.

“Oh sorry, I got so caught up here washing dishes!”

I’m trying to make an impromptu excuse but I’m pretty sure it sounds really weird to him now. I mean, right now there are no dirty dishes to wash except one mug I currently have in my hands… I just know he is a bit confused.

“Umm, Y/N, didn’t we just wash th-”

“So how was training?” I cut him off before he questions me any further.

“Well, great as always. Tired, sure, but you know…” He pauses to kiss my neck, “whenever I see you after training, I am so recharged right away.”

I bite my bottom lip and feel my cheeks are turning red. Ugh, focus Y/N… Remember the big news you have yet to tell him! I remind myself quietly.

“Recharge? What am I, a phone charger?”

I instantly regret that lame, super unfunny joke I just said. He chuckles, I believe he is just being the supportive partner he always is.

“Okay, yeah, that’s a good one, Mrs. Pulisic.”

“Oh by the way, I think I see something that looks like a gift right over there,” he points to the gift box over the counter, “is that for me?”

“I don’t know… Maybe?”

“What is it?” He straightforwardly asks about it.

“Christian…” I sigh.

“What did I do to deserve it?” He quickly asks again.

I turn around, rolling my eyes at him to show him in a jokey way that his questions annoy me.

“My goodness, Christian, just open the goddamn gift!”

He quickly walks across the room while saying the phrase “What’s in the box? What’s in the box???” repeatedly. I carefully watch every little move he makes – I really want to cherish this moment.

“Awww, baby, am I really your special man?” He cutely pouts and puts his hands over his chest when he reads the notes.

I can’t help but laugh at his adorable face.

When he starts opening the gift box, I can feel my heart jump a little. I subconsciously start fidgeting my fingers and shake my legs – I really am that nervous. I almost certainly know that he’s going to react positively but, what if I could be wrong?

Before I know it, I see him gasping, then has his hands covering his mouth, with both of his eyes widened. He then turns to my direction with the look of disbelief written all over his face.

“Y/N???” His jaw drops and his breath hitches.

“Are we… Are w-” He is really caught off guard by this big news he is losing words for a moment.

“Uhm, sorry, I uh, I wh-” he pauses for a good second before continuing, “Are we having a baby???”

“Yeah…” I excitedly nod in response. “I just found out this morning.”

He then runs back to me, hugs me tight and buries his face in between my neck and shoulder – I can slightly feel his tears over my shoulder.

“You’re going to be a dad, Christian.” I whisper to him.

And just like that, I just made him cry even harder.

“My love…” He sobs. “Thank you… Thank you. I love you!”

He looks down and puts his hand on my tummy, then his eyes go straight into mine.

“It’s a bit surreal thinking about how our child is now growing inside you… You’re unbelievably amazing, Y/N.”

He then kneels in front of my tummy while holding my waists with both his hands, and talks to our growing child.

“Hi little angel, I can’t wait to meet you… I love you so much already.” He kisses my tummy after.

—

We started telling our family and close friends a few days after the first sonogram. Everyone was so happy for us and has been very lovely and wonderful to us – especially me, of course. Both mine and his family would go all the way to make sure I got everything I need, and the moms have been offering generous help and willingly guiding me through my first pregnancy whenever I need them to.

During the ultrasound, Christian didn’t let go of my hand even for a second and asked the doctor so many questions that I didn’t even think about – apparently the night before he had done his research and I was not aware of that. When we got to see our growing fetus on the screen and listen to their heartbeat, Christian – who usually doesn’t really show his emotions on his face – became very emotional and it kind of freaked me out. Being a dad is truly one of the biggest dreams he has ever had. Now that it’s really coming true, his emotions are all over the place and because he is not used to experiencing such overflowing emotions, he is still trying his best to manage them. Though I think that is adorable, I just love to make fun of him for it.

“You know, Chris, I’m wondering who the hell is actually with a baby?” I poke fun at his “hormonal” reaction. “Because it’s like your hormones are going crazy while I’m here able to control my emotions.”

“Oh shut up,” he moans, “what’s happening is that my heart is warmer now while yours is still ice cold.”

My jaw drops at his immediate, clever clap back. Oh how I love sassy Christian!

“Stop it!” I laugh really hard. “That’s a good burn on me, Pulisic!”

—

Since Christian found out we are expecting, he has been extra attentive, present and caring to me. Though I appreciate it greatly, it can be too much sometimes. Therefore I would ask him to back down a bit and thankfully he never fails to understand that I still need my space.

No matter how busy he might be, he never wants to miss going to every doctor appointment. He also always pays very good attention to our baby’s development – he even has a binder made specifically for it. He gets excited all the time when the baby kicks, and when the baby is kicking so hard he would talk to my tummy.

“Sweetheart, please be good in there. Don’t hurt Mommy, okay?”

“My little angel, don’t kick Mommy’s tummy that hard, please. Let’s not make Mommy feel hurt.”

He always communicates with the baby and every time, they would respond to Christian. It’s like they have bonded really well even before they meet, and the thought of him being so close with our child really melts my heart.

He loves taking pictures of my growing bump. Every single time he would tell me I look really beautiful while carrying our child, and my reaction would either be thanking him shyly or telling him to shut the crap – depending on my mood that day, really. Pregnancy has given me mood swings lately I can’t even predict how I would be feeling that day whenever a new day starts. But Christian has always had a lot of patience and I admire how he would perfectly handle me no matter how good or bad my mood might be. Yeah, he is without a doubt going to be the best parent and I can’t wait to witness it.

We decided to not find out about our baby’s sex because we want to surprise ourselves. Besides, we really don’t care if we’re having a boy or a girl. We don’t want to set certain expectations especially when it comes to their sex or gender because all we care about is that they’re healthy and come to this world all safe and sound. Although, we have prepared some names – but we don’t feel like making the final decision before the baby is actually born.

—

Today I woke up at 4 in the morning to a cramp on my stomach – a bit similar to the menstrual cramps I used to have at the beginning of my period. It comes and goes irregularly, and at first I got scared thinking something bad might be happening. But then I remember what my doctor had explained before: the cramp might be a sign of early labor. I then wake Christian up, letting him know I am possibly entering the early labor stage. When I tell him about it, his eyes widen all of the sudden and he slightly jumps off the bed.

“Wha- Y/N should we just get you to the hospital right now???” He sounds so worried.

“No, I don’t think so. Let’s just time each contraction and when the contraction interval is around 5 to 7 minutes, then we can go.”

I have to explain it calmly because he is visibly alarmed. Even after I do so he is still looking so tense.

“Chris, I’m alright. You can relax for now.” I assure him.

“Okay,” he takes a deep breath before continuing, ”if you say so.”

—

Almost 15 hours later, the contractions start to come closer apart and when I check my phone, the interval of last contraction to current contraction is 5 minutes, so I tell Christian that it is finally time to go to the hospital. Already dressed, he immediately grabs the car keys and sets up some blankets on the passenger’s seat in case my water breaks. After that, he goes back into the house to grab hospital bags then puts them in the trunk of our car. Not long after, he sees me struggling to get into the car, so he gently helps me and once I get in, he makes sure I am sitting comfortably before locking all the doors at our house.

“Okay, everything is set, now it’s time to go.” He says as he starts the car.

He looks at me for a second and gives me a kiss on my forehead before he takes the wheel.

“Let’s go have a baby, shall we?”

—

The midwife informs me that I’m now 10 centimeters dilated, meaning it is finally time to push. I am still in incredible pain and genuinely terrified to do so because I don’t know if I can still bear the pain while pushing a full-sized human baby out of my vagina. Also, I have heard about this thing called “ring of fire” – it’s the strong burning sensation that you will experience when your baby is crowning – and now that it’s about to happen, I can’t stop thinking about it. While getting into the birthing position, I turn to Christian who is standing next to me.

“Christian, I’m scared…” I whimper. “I don’t know if I can do this…”

Hearing what I say truly breaks his heart. He hates knowing I’m scared yet he can’t do anything about it except giving me the encouragement he knows I need. He then looks deep into my eyes, smiling at me while caressing my hair, with his other hand holding mine tight.

“Yes you can, my love.” He softly says.

“You are the strongest person I have ever known so I know you know you absolutely can! It’s okay to be scared but baby, I’m here.” He kisses my forehead. “Let’s go meet our little angel, yeah?”

I nod and take some deep breaths to prepare myself. Then I let the doctor know I’m ready and they immediately tell me to start pushing.

One push, two pushes, those were not so bad. Starting from third push, it starts to feel very, very painful.

“You’re doing great my love!”

He is basically being my ultimate cheerleader the whole time. He doesn’t let go of my hand no matter how hard I might grip his hand. He says he doesn’t feel a thing though I know he is lying his butt off for my benefit.

“Chris this hurts so bad…” I bawl, squeezing his hand hard. “This really hurt…”

His eyes suddenly become all teary. He can no longer hide his ache seeing the woman he loves greatly has to endure unthinkable pain to bring his child into the world.

“My love I’m sorry…” He weeps. “I’m sorry you have to go through this… But sweetheart you know you can keep going, a few more pushes and our baby is here…”

I keep pushing even though at some point I didn’t feel like I could do it anymore. But having Christian there gives me the strength I need during the birthing process.

“Y/N, let’s give one big final push!” Says the doctor.

“Uh, yeah, okay…” I say to them as my breath hitches.

I’m already very exhausted but unfortunately there’s no way I can stop. I can feel my baby is crowning and this “ring of fire” sensation is no joke – so when the doctor told me to do one final push all I can think of is that this pain will be over soon.

“C’mon sweetheart! You can do this!”

I hear a loud crying from my baby.

“Congratulations, it’s a girl!” The doctor excitedly announces.

“Oh my God, honey, we have a daughter!” I turn to Christian and see him already flooded with tears.

“Our little princess…” He sobs. “One more beautiful girl for me to love for the rest of my life.”

—

Christian and I can’t stop looking at our newborn daughter.

“Chris, look at her… She’s so tiny.”

“These little fingers are the cutest.”

She wraps Christian’s forefinger with her entire hand.

“She has your lips, Y/N.” He points out.

“Yeah… But she mostly has your features so I was basically just an oven!” I jokily grunt.

“Well you know it isn’t my fault that my genes are more prominent, is it?” he playfully replies, “I’m just that good.”

I roll my eyes, pretending to be irritated.

“Smug butthead.”

“Hey, watch your words, Mommy!”

Christian got me laughing and blushing. He just reminds me that I’m a mom now! It feels like we just had the talk about growing our family yesterday and the next thing I know I am now in a hospital, just giving birth to our sweet little angel who is sleeping peacefully in my arms at this moment. This still doesn’t feel real… Our lives are now officially changed forever and I couldn’t imagine mine before her.

“Hey,” Christian wraps his arms around me and rests his head on my shoulder, then whispers, “I love you.”

I have not stopped smiling and I can feel my smile getting wider.

“I love you.” I reply.

“You’re my everything, Y/N.” He adds.

“Oh no, you’re about to say some sappy monologue aren't you?”

“Yeah, here it comes…”.

Before he says his little speech he kisses me on the cheeks.

“Y/N… I can never thank you enough. You have made my dreams come true and I still don’t know why I deserve you in the first place! Thank you for making my life a lot more perfect than I ever imagined.”

I’m starting to sob.

“Christian…”

“I hated seeing you in so much pain just to bring her into the world.” He continues. “I wish it was me instead… But you continue to amaze me with your strength. And now, I love you so much more – more than I ever love anyone, even myself. Ever since you came into my life you have changed my world for the better. I never wanted to live my life with anyone else but you, and I’m beyond grateful we have a beautiful child together.”

“I will take good care of my girls for as long as I live…” His voice starts to shake. “I love you. I love you so much. You are the best thing that ever happened to me, Y/N.”

Tears immediately streaming down my face. I just gave birth so my hormones are all over the place, and his beautiful speech doesn’t help. He got me speechless and extremely emotional.

“Ugh,” I jokingly grunt as I wipe my tears with my hand, “how dare you make me cry, Pulisic.”

And suddenly we see our baby giving us her first big smile – it’s like she is reacting to all the love and emotions her parents are experiencing right now!

“Awwwww!” Christian and I make the same sound in unison.

And of course, it makes me cry even harder. Christian is emotional too, by the way, but not as messed up as I am currently. He grabs some tissues and gently wipes my face – which is all wet thanks to the river of tears – with them right away as I am still holding our daughter.

“Y/N, my love, I don’t think you will ever stop crying from now on, no?” He laughs.

“Obviously not!”

—

“So, have you two decided on baby girl’s name?”

Christian and I instantly look at each other when the nurse asks that question. As I said, we have prepared some names for our baby but we have yet to choose the perfect name for her. Christian then grabs a piece of paper with the list of names from his pocket and as soon as the nurse leaves the room, we start discussing right away.

“Okay, uh… Which one do you love the most, Y/N?”

“I don’t know, Chris,” I reply, “there are too many options.”

“Well you can’t say you don’t know,” Christian sighs, “we have to pick two.”

An idea suddenly passes through my head.

“Why don’t we try this out: we say any name we each feel perfectly fitting for her at the same time. What do you think?” I suggest.

“Yeah okay, it’s worth a try.” He agrees.

“Alright, let’s say it in the count of three.” I instruct him.

“One, two, three…”

“Dylan!”

“Emery?”

He didn't sound sure at first, but then changed his mind immediately. “Oh, I like both names!”

“Dylan Emery Pulisic… It has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

I agree with him. I look at our little bundle of joy in my arms and I just know those names were made for her.

“Yeah, that’s definitely her name.”

—

Even though we are now taking care of our newborn together, Christian did have to fight just to get enough paternity leave. It was not easy for him because Dylan was born in the middle of the season and he is one of the most crucial players for the team, but he really wanted to take care of his daughter especially during the first few weeks of her life. Not only that, he feels like I have done so much already and he wants to also take care of you while you recover from the whole pregnancy and childbirth periods. He wouldn’t even mind getting less playing time when he comes back, because in his own words: “Now my priorities are my girls, football is much less important than both of you.”

Before Dylan was born, Christian had been practicing basically everything to prepare him for fatherhood. He can change the diapers, clean and bathe the baby, perfectly wrap her, he knows how to help soothe the baby, burp her after feeding – anything, really. He truly is excited to embrace this new life as a parent.

Dylan’s first week at home was hard, I had to adjust my sleeping schedule because until she’s a bit older I have to feed her every 2-3 hours and it messes up my sleeping. Not only that, she would loudly scream and cry all of the sudden and it mostly happens in the middle of the night. But Christian is always there, ready to help no matter how tired he might be – it’s a bare minimum but not all dads would be very hands-on like him – and I’m beyond grateful I don’t have to do everything alone. We always stay up late together, like when I have to feed Dylan at 12 AM and 3 AM. Most of the time, when we heard Dylan crying in the other room, he would tell me to go back to sleep and offer to take care of her. I would see them from the baby monitor and I’m telling you, he truly is the best dad. Seeing him being so loving to our daughter makes me already think about having another baby… But obviously both of us want to focus on raising Dylan so we decided to put the conversation on hold until Dylan is old enough to be a big sister.

Two weeks after Dylan came into the world, Christian decides it is time to introduce her to everyone at Milanello. So he brings both of us to the training grounds and shows her off to the staff and players. The club even got Dylan a mini home jersey kit as a way to welcome her to the Milan family.

One of his teammates greets us the second we get into the dressing room and ask about his current state. And to be honest, Christian’s heartfelt answer to it reminds me how lucky I am that I get to do this parenthood journey with him.

“Christian, hey! How are you feeling now, bro?

“Well I am a husband and a brand new father, so from now on I will always be feeling a lot happier than I have ever been. I am now on the start of a new life, thanks to my amazing, beautiful girls.”

—

taglist: @pulisicsgirl @neverinadream @swimmingismywholelife @chilwellspulisic @bracedes @lovelynikol16 @thoseboysinblue @lizzypotter14 @masonsrem @landoslover

#christian pulisic #christian pulisic x fem!reader #christian pulisic x reader #christian pulisic fic #christian pulisic fanfic #christian pulisic imagines #christian pulisic one shot #christian pulisic fluff #christian pulisic x you #footballer x reader #footballer fic #footballer fanfic #footballer imagines #footballer one shot #footballer fluff

222 notes · View notes

cyverrieee · 4 months

Text

ＣＹＶＥＲＦＩＬＥＳ

𝙻𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝙼𝚎𝚛𝚖𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝙰𝚞 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝙰𝚣𝚞𝚕

꒷︶꒷꒥꒷‧₊˚૮꒰˵•ᵜ•˵꒱ა‧₊˚꒷︶꒷꒥꒷

➳ 01 : I love the little mermaid growing up so

for real, it gave me some ideas from @thecoolsquirrel 's post (hehe) ANYWAYS I love Azul sm. I altered the plot to match Azul's backstory or smth-

➳ 02 : Contains random merpeople names😝

꒷︶꒷꒥꒷‧₊˚૮꒰˵•ᵜ•˵꒱ა‧₊˚꒷︶꒷꒥꒷

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐈 : 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐮𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐎𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐨𝐭

— ... —

Growing up, Azul never had friends before middle school. He was seen as the odd one out because of his chubby stature and eight legs. He would always stay in his pot because he's scared. Scared that someone would talk bad about him, that is—before he met the two leech twins. He had fun with them, standing up for Azul to stop his bullies

At that time, he was studying everything he can get from the school library. He won't lie; he's interested in land dwellers but where he lives. They despise them, they ruin their homes and take stuff from the reefs! Azul's mother even hated them more. She always told Azul to never go to the surface because "who knows what danger lies in land", yes it's true. He doesn't know anything about the land as much but he's curious enough for a peep! He started collecting the stuff the land dwellers drop in sea.

“Haaa? What's this?”

Floyd talked, Jade looking at the different items that Azul hoarded in his secret collection room. Floyd holds a danglehopper (a fork), doing random stuff to see it's purpose.

“Oh well.. I'm not sure! But the white Bird from the surface told me it's something land dwellers use to comb their hair”

Azul explained like the nerd he was, adjusting his glasses in the process. Jade looks at his brother who was combing his hair with the "danglehopper". The three metal bristles smoothly brush through Floyd's sleek teal locks. He was in awe by it, Jade only laughs in amusement

“Hey 'zul! Mind if I keep it?”

Floyd yelled, Azul sighed playfully with a pout

“I knew you were gonna say that. But sure.. ”

Azul murmured, Floyd flicks his eel tail with glee. Jade looks around and finds a box full of silver and gold circular objects. The calmer leech twin grabs one from the box. It shimmered a golden hue— Jade clicked a small button on the front of the weird circular object. The top flung open showing a long hand and a small hand. Azul saw Jade's interest towards the circular metal objects

“I haven't named those things yet. The white Bird also told me that land dwellers use these to tell time"

He muttered, Floyd let out a small "ahhh" at the explanation. Jade nodded and asked in interest.

“Mind if i take something like this?”

Azul agreed, Jade thanked Azul for letting him have one of these circular shiny objects. Dawn hit— and the twins returned back home with Azul, Azul has always hid his secret interest of Land Dweller items from his parents; knoeing them, they won't be happy if they knew this.

The silver haired octopus sat with his family for dinner. Azul's mother was talking with his father, leaving Azul all silent, but he prefered that since he was busy thinking of a way to get some more information in Land Dwellers. Him and his parents did have some small talks before and after dinner, but after that– Azul just goes to his room to think of ways to learn about humans. Even til now he was interested in them..

He wont lie, he kind of dreams for a partner in his life. Its a dream— he knows that, knowing him being an octopus that no one wants. He just didn't have the time to believe in that fairy tale of his. Well before he met such a charming young royal who fell of their ship..

꒷︶꒷꒥꒷‧₊˚૮꒰˵•ᵜ•˵꒱ა‧₊˚꒷︶꒷꒥꒷

➥ 𝐇𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲'𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬! 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐧. 𝐔𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜 𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 :(

! ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ғᴏʀɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏ sᴛᴀʏ ʜᴇᴀʟᴛʜʏ! ᴅʀɪɴᴋ ᴡᴀᴛᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴇᴀᴛ ғᴏᴏᴅ ᴀᴄᴄᴏʀᴅɪɴɢʟʏ !

ʙᴇʟᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ sᴇᴇ ᴍʏ ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ!

ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ!

Chapter 2 ->

#vanni talks #akix's lil stars #cyber's wonderland #disney twst #twst wonderland #twst x reader #twst au #azul ashengrotto x reader #azul ashengrotto #twst azul #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland

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wandsandlightsabers · 8 months

Text

I Need You

MANDALORIAN X READER

(daddy issues edition)

18+ WARNING DO NOT INTERACT IF YOU'RE A MINOR. THIS IS SMUT.

You are a small tavern owner, on a small planet on the outskirts of the galaxy, called "y/n's tavern". It was left to you after your parents died in the war between the Rebels and the Empire, so now you've just been operating it alone. Even though you're far away from where most of the action is, you still get quite a lot of interesting customers. This helps you get a lot of information that can be useful for all types of creatures. Which is great cause since you've been tight on money with all the republic taxes, you could definitely use the extra income for your intel.

Out of all your customers though, there's a certain Mandalorian who often stops by for said information, or even just to cool off from his job. You've wondered if he feels as though this place is comforting to him. Nonetheless, he is always the best customer and he leaves you a good tip. Now if you're being honest with yourself, you've always had a huge crush on him ever since he came in through your doors. There's always been flirting between the both of you, especially since he keeps coming back here. But most of the times, he doesn't let it get too far. From what you can gather, you deduce that he might have some abandonment issues, or something like that. You think about how you wish you could help him feel safe and comforted all the time, you try to avoid thinking that though. He's just a customer after all, and he has a very busy job.

On a certain Monday night though, the tavern was practically empty. This is always one of the slow shifts. Especially since you can hear the low drizzle of rain outside, everyone tends to stay inside with that weather but there is still some foot traffic sometimes. As you fight to keep your eyes open while washing some cups, you hear the jingle of the bell on top of the door open. Finally, a customer, you think to yourself. "Welcome in" you say as you turn around, when your eyes meet your favorite man. The Mandalorian. "I came all the way from across the galaxy to see you" he says tiredly. "Did you?" You reply. "Yes, this isn't for business though. Look if I'm being honest I just need some comfort and you haven't left my mind." You stand there shocked, is this really happening? Is the Mandalorian really opening up to you right now? Something must seriously be wrong. You walk to the door of the tavern and lock it, so that it's just the two of you. There wasn't going to be anymore customers anyways. You feel his tall strong body towering behind you as you lock the door and when he turns around he's leaning on the doorframe over you. "Y/n" he says, "throughout all my visits here you've never left my mind, and after all this time, with everything I've been through... I've realized that... I want... No... I need things to go further with you. I want you to be my partner." You stand there speechless, of course you've always dreamed of this but now that it's actually happening it doesn't feel real. "Mando, I'm obviously flattered. But what are you saying? What has gotten into you? Every other time you've come by you've always made sure not to cross the line. Even when I felt like that line were chains to avoid me getting close to you." You reply. "I can't talk about it now, but I've had to do some things that really made me change my perspective on my life and now I just need you in it y/n, please." He says as gets down on his knees and hugs your waist. "I will do anything to protect you so long as you want me to stay by your side." You suck in a breath and tell him, "Of course I would love that Mando, it's all I've been thinking about since you came through to this tavern years ago." He stands up, lifting you up in the process. This all feels so insanely natural. All of the sudden it feels like you've been a couple for centuries. "Okay then, my beautiful girl. No one in this galaxy can ever put a finger on you again do you hear me?" You chuckle and say, "I have needs though, who's gonna fill them when you're off again?" You joke. "You're mine now princess, I'm not going to leave your side and after we're done your needs will be more than well met, on that I can give you my word. I want to give you a taste of what life would be like if we were together. I want to show you just how much I need you. Do I have your consent?" He asks.

"Of course you do Mando, with all of the flirting you've been doing these past few years we gotta do something about it don't you think?" You joke. "Perfect my pretty little girl, here are the rules: I can't show you my face just yet because we'd need to make our relationship official by marriage before I can do that. However, I want to give you a taste of what it would be like..." he reaches for a rag that was laying on the bar table and uses it cover your eyes as he ties it around your head, leaving you blindfolded. This heightens your senses by a million and each touch he places on your feel like electric shocks. You gladly comply to all of his demands, he's a great dom and you feel safe with him. Not to mention that you have a burning need for a taste. You feel his hot breath on your body as he lowers to remove all of his armor, then moving his attention to you as he roughly takes off your work dress. "Fuck, you're more beautiful than I could have ever imagined, princess" He whispers in your ear. You feel him move up slowly, then he meets his lips to yours all at once passionately and roughly working his tongue around yours. This kiss feels like one of those moments you wait your whole life for, both of you feeling such great need for one another and finally being able to satisfy it.

He reaches his strong, rough hands to your hair and breasts cupping them firmly then teasing your sensitive nipples. Hell, you could probably orgasm with him just doing that. You let out a moan, unable to hold it in much longer. "Shh my little slut, if you keep being that loud, people outside are going to get wrong ideas about you... we don't want that to happen do we? Be a good girl and stay quiet for me, won't you?" He commands. God, he's so hot you think to yourself. He keeps touching your whole body then finally, finally traces his hand down from your breast all the way down to your practically throbbing clit. The moment you feel him put pressure as he starts rubbing it in slow circles you feel another moan escape your mouth. "Bad girl," he says "wait did I tell you about being loud?" "I'm sorry Mando you're just making me feel so fucking good," you tell him. He yanks you off the table onto his lap, lying you onto your stomach so your bare ass is facing him. "Well princess, you're going to need to face the consequences of not following the rules. Do you understand?" He asks. You nod your head in compliance as he says "Now, I'm going to finger your brains out since you're being a needy little girl and I want you to take it without getting the attention of the people outside. If you are unable to contain yourself, I'm gonna have to spank you." With that you feel his rough, thick fingers shove into your dripping wet vagina filling you in a way that makes you feel simply euphoric. "Look how needy you are, princess." He picks up the pace, and you bit your lip as you try to contain your moans. You feel him hitting your g-spot over and over. "Please, daddy you're making me feel so good can I please take your cock. I need to feel you." you beg him. "Daddy?" he questions "you really are just a dirty slut, now aren't you?" You feel him slap your ass firmly. There goes another electric shock racing through your body... the effect this man has on you is like an addiction you'll never be able to recover from. "How about this... I'll give your needy pussy what it wants, but only because I'm starving for a feel of you. Would you be a good girl and suck daddy's dick for him so that it's all wet for you, princess?" You moan quietly at his words and shift your position while opening your mouth ready for him to stick it in. You feel the tip of it around your lips, waiting for his full length. You give him a tease by swirling your tongue around his throbbing tip, he moans and you decide that his moan is more beautiful than angels singing. You will do anything to hear it again, knowing that you have just as much as an effect on him as he does to you. You guide your way to surround his entire hard cock in your mouth. But god, you did not imagine him to be that big. You try your best to put it all in, but it's just too much for your little mouth; you feel your gag reflex. "We're gonna need to work on that huh pretty girl?" he asks. You nod as you move up and down his length, still blindfolded. You feel him gripping your hair as you swirl and messily wet his dick as best you can. When he decided it was enough he gently took it out to lower himself and kiss you, licking off all his precum from around your mouth. "You're messy," he chuckles in a low and heated voice. He lays you completely flat, back on the table and spreads your legs wide open, leaving you utterly and completely exposed to him. "Are you ready?" He questions. "More than ready, quit wasting time, Mando" you tell him. He rubs his wet, hard, and throbbing cock on your clit; pressing it on you to give you even more satisfaction, then he rubs it all around your pussy's lips. He hasn't even put it in yet and you're already seeing all the stars in this galaxy. You moan loudly and both of you have stopped caring about the noises you two are making as he finally slides it in, filling your vagina and it feels like you were built for each other. He fits so well inside of you.. the overwhelming feeling of him completely inside you, hugging all sides of your hole is intoxicating.

He's hitting all the right spots and you feel your legs starting to shake. You've had sex once before, but never, ever has it been or felt like this. This man is more than you could have dreamed of. "Fuck... you feel so good y/n... you're so tight" he mutters as best he can between moans. He reaches down his hand and rubs your clit at the same time as he is slipping in and out of you. This sends you over the edge, "Daddy... I... I'm going to cum... please... don't stop" you whisper. "Come on pretty girl, cum for me, show me just how good I'm making you feel right now." He replies. He dives and flicks your nipple with his tongue, at the same time he's paying all the special attention to your pussy. If there's one thing you were more than happy to discover, is how fucking good he is at multitasking. Your oragsm explodes over you as he touches and thrusts into you, screaming his name. "Good girl" he manages to say as your clenching pussy makes him cum at the same time. You both go blind with the fireworks you gave each other. As you both go limp with pleasure, you feel such an intense knowing of belonging and love towards one another that you had never felt in your entire life. Like you were meant to be, you are his and he is yours.

"Mando.." you whisper. He sinks onto a chair and pulls your naked body onto his, holding you tightly. "I want to take off this blindfold and see the real you. I want to see the real man I've fallen in love with." you tell him. You feel him suck in a breath, he tucks your hair behind your ear and tells you "I need to confess something first, y/n. Ever since I met you that first day in the tavern, I have fallen utterly and irrevocably in love with you. It's made me question everything. Like what I want out of my life as a Mandalorian. And princess, after my last mission it made me come to a realization. This last bounty was on a woman who had made some bad choices, and the man I had searched for to get information from was a man who was so in love with this woman; but he had never confessed his feelings for her. He ended up telling me the entire story of how it was love at first sight, but he always felt like he could never deserve her because of his job, who he was, etc.. This story completely captivated me in a way that woke me up to the fact that: y/n, I can't continue living a life without you by my side. I want you. I need you." He unties your blindfold and turns your head to face his. Your eyes meet the most beautiful man you've ever seen in your life, your Mandalorian. "I know this isn't the Way of the Mandalore, but you're my new way. I want to follow you to the ends of the galaxy and do anything that needs to be done to provide and care for you. Nothing could ever compare to you. I love you so much, I always have. You're my way" He explains. Speechless, you reach your hand to him and cup his face as you both lovingly stare into the new look of each other's eyes. "You're my way too, Din." you tell him. "You know my real name?" He asks with subtle tears forming in his eyes> You can tell he's never been this exposed and accepted by someone for the real him. "Remember, I'm great at gathering information. After all, that is way you came to me in the first place." You joke. You both let out a soft laugh and lean in for a pure, sincere and finally fully exposed: kiss.

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mybworlds · 3 months

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CHAPTER 8

status: ongoing

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

summary: your life is full of 'must'. You live with your overprotective mother who controls every aspect of your life. You have a dream, to write romance novels, but love - real love - you haven't found yet. Your mother has even decided what you must do in your free time: play music. One day, however, when you go to your music teacher's house, you will have an unexpected encounter and from that day on things change…

Masterlist

rating: 18+ explicit (minors, DNI)

Before to start... Happy Valentine's Day! ❤️

Thank you for your support, for your likes and reblog, thank you, thank you, thank you ❤️

In this chapter there are some smut moments...

If you like it pls leave a like/comment/reblog it, if you don't like it don't be rude and keep going. Please remember English is not my first language, so please be merciful!

Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner

The next day you have a date with Jack at the diner, it's a busy place, it's always busy, there's good country music that day, you and Jack sit at a small square-shaped table under one of the many windows. He takes your hand on more than one occasion, kisses you and observes how good you look in that cobalt-colored mini-dress that leaves your shoulders uncovered and tells you he wishes he could kiss you properly elsewhere. You look down as you feel your cheeks burning; when you look up again, you see just a little way away from you Joel sitting at the counter.

You widen your eyes in amazement and just then he turns to you, stares at you with parted lips and an almost lost look, then turns to the bartender and you see him asking for something and you see him drinking. You imagine it's something alcoholic judging by the color. You can't help but look at his broad shoulders, his big hands holding the glass and bringing it to his lips, his soft lips, and most of all you can't help but think what it would be like to be wrapped in his huge arms, to be caressed by his hands, you wonder what it would feel like to…

"You're coming, right?" you hear Jack ask you something.

"What?" you say as you notice Joel get up and walk to the restroom.

"You'll come to see me at the exam, right? You're my luck charm." he says smiling at you and taking your right hand.

"Y-yes, um… Jack I'm going to the restroom for a moment. Please check my bag while I'm away." you tell him and without waiting for an answer, you walk away making room among the people.

Someone dances, waiters pass among the dancers and diners carrying trays filled with various food and drinks, a little bit with difficulty you reach the restroom.

You close the door behind you and enter the small hallway where there is a mirror, a large two-basin sink, a small dispenser and some paper to dry your hands. The music there is less deafening, you breathe deeply and close your eyes. Maybe you should stop thinking about Joel like that. You wash your hands and dry them as best you can.

Joel is a friend and my music teacher. Joel is a friend and my music teacher. Joel is…

At one point the door to the men's room opens, you see Joel reflected in the mirror, he sees you too, and before you can say hello or say anything else, he suddenly turns you toward him and pulls you into the men's room, locking the door behind him.

"J - Joel." you're more surprised by that sudden movement than by himself and his bright eyes, you can't say anything to him because he pounces on your lips, capturing them in a kiss quite different from the one you gave each other a few nights earlier at his house. This kiss is demanding, it's impetuous, passionate, it causes a strange and unfamiliar languor deep down inside you.

His tongue enters in your mouth almost overpoweringly, you almost struggle to maintain that rhythm, but you don't push him away. You don't want to push him away despite your initial surprise. You taste the strong alcohol taste of it, even though you understand that he is not quite himself, you don't want to push him away.

Joel first wraps your face with his big hands, then he moves his hands down your neck, he caresses your bare shoulders slowly and languidly, feeling his hands on your skin causes you to shiver, he moves down to your hips and then suddenly lifts you into his arms crushing you between the wall and him. You've never felt him so close to you, never really felt his heat or his physique, that contact shakes you and reverberates inside you, down your spine to reach an area of you you've never explored until that moment.

"You are beautiful." he murmurs under his breath, looking you in the eyes and stroking your thighs with his thumbs and then kissing along your jaw line and slowly moving down your neck, you find yourself closing your eyes and before you know moaning his name softly.

"You have no idea how much I desire you," he confesses, leaving a trail of wet kisses to your sternum. You groan threading your hands through his hair feeling something press against your inner thigh.

"I'm sorry…" he moans almost breathlessly and looking into your eyes "I'm sorry." he tells you slowly releasing his grip on your thighs and making you get your feet back on the ground, but without moving away from you completely. He strokes your hair in a very gentle gesture and looks at you, "I'm not like that." he tells you regretfully "Forgive me." having said this he looks at your face again for a brief moment, then opens the door to the men's room and exits; then, he opens the other door again and you hear him leave.

You remain speechless. Eyes wide, heart in your throat and breathless. You brush your lips and then your still half-naked chest, you feel your heart beating furiously against your rib cage. You swallow trying to control your breathing and place your head against the bathroom wall.

For the first time in your life you wish you could feel his lips on your breasts and feel his hands caressing you elsewhere as well. You close your eyes and try to push those sinful thoughts away. You find yourself thinking that you want him, you desire him with all of your being, that maybe you should have held him back instead of stumbling against the wall.

You take more deep breaths and then decide to leave the men's room. You stare at yourself in the mirror, your hair is not as neat as before, but it seems to have been run through by that strange electricity that has been between you and Joel too, you fix it as best you can with your hands, then you adjust your dress and look at your face, your eyes are shiny and your lips as red as a ripe apple. You hope it hasn't been too long, you don't want Jack to ask too many questions.

You go out and a little bit with difficulty, as the crowd has increased even more, you catch up with him. He was looking at his cell phone, when he sees you, smiles and locks the screen "Hey!" he says "Were there people in the bathroom?"

Just what you didn't want.

"Yes, two people, and they took longer than they should have," you reply as you sit down and look at the menu that was meanwhile at the side of the table "Have you decided what to get?" you ask him. Actually, you are not hungry, not after what happened with Joel, but you decide to pretend that everything is the same as before.

When you get home, you are still alone.

You still have an hour before your mother returns from those wacky religious meetings of hers; so, you decide to take a hot shower.

As the water caresses your skin, you think back to what Joel said to you, think back to the way he pulled you to him, to his hands around your face and in your hair, to the way he caressed you, to his eyes, to his lips on your mouth and neck, the thoughts you rehearsed that morning come back overpoweringly, you wonder what it would be like to feel him kiss your skin completely naked, to what it would be like to be naked underneath him.

You find yourself instinctively clutching your legs in the shower and closing your eyes, you have never felt the desire to be touched, kissed, but most of all desired by another. Suddenly you would want him here with you in the shower, he would certainly know what to do and how to do it.

You get out of the shower, wrap yourself in a towel and look at yourself in the mirror.

You would like to be different, to look different.

Tomorrow you are going shopping with Gina, maybe you are crazy, but you want to dare.

Until today you have always been quiet, ordinary, monotonous, now you want to dare and experience something that until not long ago you would have called extreme and even inappropriate.

You dry yourself and then with your towel still on, you check your mother has not returned and then go to your room and lie on your bed.

The street lights barely filter into your room, creating an intimate atmosphere.

You close your eyes and think back to Joel. You might think of Jack, but your mind goes to Joel immediately. You think about what it would be like to lie next to him naked, what it would be like to have his hand grazing your breasts, just the thought of it causes you to shiver and make your nipples tingle, a strange urge makes its way inside you again, you feel wet. You have that same need you felt a few weeks ago when you were lying next to Joel and this morning in the club bathroom.

Your hand drops instinctively between your legs. You have never touched yourself, ever. You don't know your sex from that point of view. Sure, you've studied it from science books, but you don't know if and what you like, how you like to be caressed. What you know, it's that right now you have shivers and you find yourself, for the second time in the course of this day, moaning Joel's name, as you are with your hand on your pubis, as you touch your outer lips, you feel wet and you think if he were here with you right now he probably would have touched you gently, sweetly, but firmly at the same time.

In the distance you hear the front door open and your mother shout, "I'm home!" so you open your eyes again, jerk out of bed, and put on your usual pink pajamas.

"Coming!" you immediately exclaim in a tone of voice maybe too high, but you are still overwhelmed by that new pleasant feeling. You need to confide in someone, and you can only do so with your experienced friends.

During dinner, neither you nor your mother talk much, she is probably immersed in the reflections that the guy holding these meetings has instilled in her fragile mind, you on the other hand are lost in this new erotic fantasy.

The next day you tell what happened to Gina, Helen, and Kristen. Gina and Helen hug you almost as if you had told them you had won the gold medal of some prestigious championship, Kristen smiles at you moderately and asks you what you plan to do now that the image of Joel seems to have made its way into your mind.

"I still have to think about it, but first I want to buy myself something new," you say.

"I'm taking you to the beautician to get your legs, arms, and then there, too," Gina proposes, taking your arm under her arm.

"Maybe some neutral nail polish," Helen also proposes.

"Girls, I'm glad to have you with me and to get your advices, but what does waxing and nail polish have to do with what I think I'm feeling for Joel?" you ask as the two friends hold you under your arm.

"Honey, the eye needs its share too, and if it's going to touch you, well we might as well make our daddy enjoy it properly," says Gina winking at you.

"Will you stop calling him daddy? I'm impressed with that nickname. It's true that he's bigger, but…" you say, but you don't know how to finish the sentence.

You have never visited so many stores as you did at that moment, you feel like Julia Roberts in the movie 'Pretty Woman,' you go in and out of the most different stores, lingerie stores, more casual stores, more elegant ones, various nail polish and makeup stores, finally all four of you go to the beautician where you undergo what Gina calls a real makeover.

When you leave there your skin is flushed, but your eyes big and happy, you finally like yourself. Your eyebrows have a decent shape, you are lightly made up, you have pale pink polish on your fingernails and toenails for the first time, your skin smells good. You smile happily at your friends, who have taken advantage of this day dedicated to you to get some pampering too.

"If Joel doesn't jump on you now, it means he's a fool," Kristen comments boldly, smiling at you.

"The truth is, I don't know what to expect from our meeting tomorrow," you confess a little nervously.

"Let him dip his fingers in your honey jar," Helen repeats to you. It will be the tenth time she has repeated this to you since she saw Joel at the café that morning.

You roll your eyes, "If it's going to happen, it has to be natural. I don't want to force me first or him," you reply a little annoyed.

The next day, you are in front of the Miller's house. You stare up the small flight of stairs beyond which is the porch, with a small chair and a small table, bells attached on one side and an oil lantern on the other side, a small pile of wood to the right of the front door.

You are about to go up the flight of stairs when the door opens and Joel comes out, about to get the wood, but he sees you and stops.

You find yourself swallowing hard, but you don't look down, you don't know what to say or do it's true, but you're not going to look like a fool.

Joel is wearing a leather jacket and a pair of dark jeans that hug his legs, he approaches you with a slow pace and his gaze fixed on your person. You don't move, you're shivering - and not from the cold temperatures - but you don't flinch.

You are facing each other.

Eyes to eyes, his dark eyes scrutinize you for a long moment, he has a regretful expression, you speak "Hello."

You don't know how to start a conversation after what happened the day before at the diner.

"Hi." he says in a half voice "How are you?"

"Good." you reply without being able to look away from his eyes.

You are attracted to his face, his eyes, his voice like a moth is attracted to light.

"'m sorry." he tells you "Yesterday-- I was--" he breathes deeply "I was out of myself. It almost never happens to me, but please excuse my--" he is in obvious distress, you see him run a hand through his hair "I'm sorry. If you want nothing more to do with me, I understand," he tells you.

No. You want to scream, you're the best thing that's happened to me in my whole life, you want to add.

"Don't worry." instead you just tell him without taking your eyes off his face.

He nods with downcast eyes, "Shall we go inside?" he adds looking away from your eyes and taking the wood.

You nod, hold the door for him to enter with the pieces of wood, and then close the door behind him. The wooden floor creaks slightly under your weight, you slip off your padded jacket and leave it on the coat rack, then follow Joel into the living room, see him lay the logs in the fireplace and prepare the fire.

"It's pretty cold." he says slipping off his gloves "Then, I knew you'd like to have the fireplace lit so I was getting it ready for ya." he adds.

"Were you making this for me?" you ask him touched.

"Yes." he replies by letting his gaze linger on your face and then on you and your pink sweater and your plush leggings, you find yourself swallowing hard under his watchful gaze. You wonder if he likes the way you're dressed, judging by the way he looks at you you'd say yes, but you don't have the courage to ask him.

When the fireplace is now lit, you begin your lesson. You sit next to each other, he takes the guitar in his hands, and you listen to him play a sweet melody, a little melancholy, reminding you of something beautiful, but also sad. Something you can't quite understand. He looks at you with an indecipherable expression for a very brief moment, but you can tell he's playing that melody for you, just for you.

Could it be an apology?

"It's beautiful." you say when the last note wafts through the air "Is that a song?"

He shakes his head, "I, uh, composed it or somethin' last night. Couldn't sleep. I was here starin' the fire. I thought of you, your eyes and-- and this," he goes on, gently touching the guitar, "is what came out of it." he looks at you, "D' ya want me to teach it ya?"

You nod.

"Good." he says spreading his legs and patting the sofa a little, "Sit here."

"What?" you ask, widening your eyes in a surprised and confused expression.

"No fear, come. I'll teach ya how to play it." he says again in an innocent tone.

You swallow feeling flushed and short of breath, your thoughts are far from innocent at this moment; however, you get up and sit between his legs. Feeling him against you again, resting your back against his broad chest, feeling his muscular arms on either side of your torso makes you miss your breath even more and makes your heart race.

"Here." he says by passing the guitar in front of you and having one of your hands placed on the neck of the guitar and the other near the strings, whispering in your ear how and where to place your fingers. He's not making allusions of any kind; he's just talking to you about how to play that composition of his. You are the one who is lost in a state of almost total confusion, his hot breath against your neck and ear sends discharges all along your body, you feel your arousal growing inside you causing you to move uncomfortably again on the couch and against him.

You can barely play a few chords, you're shivering and short of breath "J -Joel." you say stopping yourself "I just can't do it that way." you admit leaving the sentence hanging, your heart pounding and chills continuing to spread everywhere, then being in contact with him complicates everything.

"Talk to me." he tells you in a firm voice "What is it?" he asks again against your ear.

You try to sit up better on the couch, your arousal growing more and more.

"Ever since you kissed and touched me like that yesterday, I've been thinking about it," you admit.

"'bout what?" he asks you.

You think he understood what you mean, but maybe he wants to hear you say it, "''bout you." you answer out of breath without having the courage to turn toward him.

"And what d' ya think of me?" he asks, brushing your earlobe with the tip of his nose causing you to shiver more.

"To how-- it would be--" you manage to answer with great difficulty given the intensity of what you feel "to have your hands on me, to what it would be like to be touched by you." you breathlessly confess to him feeling your cheeks on fire.

Joel pulls the guitar out of your hands and rests it beside him, "What d' ya want me to do?" he asks you "I do what you want me to do." he adds in a whisper against your ear.

You feel your heart beating faster in your chest, your skin flushes and that strange unfamiliar arousal spreads more and more inside you.

"I don't know what to do or say," you confess in a half-voice, "I just know that I can't stop thinking about what it would be like to feel your hands caressing me, what it would be like--" you are full of embarrassment, but you manage to finish by saying, "to be naked under you."

You can almost hear him holding his breath, who knows if he has chills too, if he thinks of you this way too.

"D' ya really want me to touch ya?" he asks, gently stroking your forearms.

You nod, breathing deeply, "Joel, please," you answer him embarrassed, but deeply eager to feel his hands on you.

You feel the man's lips touch your right earlobe and a small moan escapes you, Joel's hands are on your hips and stroking you slowly as if to give you time to figure out if you really want him or if you want him to stop, but right now you wouldn't stop him for any reason in the world. Joel dips his nose first into your hair and then inhales your good scent while closing his eyes, he had fantasized about you, but he didn't think the two of you would ever reach this point!

His lips go behind your ear to kiss an area that you discover to be very sensitive and that sends other pleasurable jolts throughout your body. One of his hands travels up your side until he reaches your neck and moves your head slightly to the side so he has better access to that portion of your skin. He kisses you slowly, leaving a small trail of wet kisses between your ear and neck. This is enough to make you close your eyes, abandoning yourself completely against his chest.

With the same hand, Joel then turns your face toward him so that he can partially see your face and have access to your mouth, which he explores in a slow, sensual caress. You feel you are in a world completely out of the ordinary, your head is spinning, but you don't have enough. All you can think is Joel, nothing but him.

You cling to his legs not knowing exactly what to do. As you let yourself go to all this, Joel moves his other hand up and down your left side and then disappears his hand under your sweater and strokes your belly slowly.

You tighten your grip on his legs just a little more as you moan into his mouth, he strokes your face with his right hand as if to reassure you of what he's doing, while with the other he encircles a breast still covered by your bra. Joel wants you, he has wanted you ever since you confided in him that day at his home, your sweetness, your need for love caused him something deep inside, beyond mere physical attraction, he wanted you of course, but he wanted to make you feel good, he wants you to be well.

You open your eyes interrupting the kiss and looking into his eyes now filled with lust, he smiles encouragingly at you "Little girl, you are wonderful." he tells you and then resumes kissing you, you feel him slip his hand inside your bra and completely envelop your breast in a caress as delicate as a feather. You no longer know what to focus on whether on the hand on your face, the kiss, or his hand gently caressing your breast and slowly wrapping a nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

"J - Joel." you moan into his mouth unable to formulate any logical thought.

"Let go." he says breaking the kiss and staying forehead to forehead. Your body reacts immediately to contact with his hand and to his caresses, he feels your body yearning for more contact, your skin becoming covered with shivers, and then he hears you moan delightfully against him. He tries to restrain himself from doing more of what he really wants, but his cock reacts to contact with your buttocks.

You swallow, trusting him. Or you wouldn't be there, you wouldn't let him touch you. You've never let anyone, if you let him, there's a reason. Although perhaps you still insist on denying it.

The hand that used to be on your face goes down your right side until it reaches your thigh and your knee and then goes back up your thigh and down again to your knee, it's a slow caress that causes you to shiver again and makes your arousal grow more and more. Then he slowly takes to stroking your inner thigh back and forth. He's driving you crazy. You feel an unfamiliar pressure mounting inside you, in your belly.

"Joel… Joel… Joel…" you can't say anything but his name.The way you say his name, the way you cling to him and the way you react to his caresses, is driving him crazy and craving more, much more.

"You are so sensitive, my baby." he tells you while you are still face to face, his warm breath against your face.

"Joel…" you groan, abandoning your head against his shoulder, squeezing your eyes and your hands against his thighs.

"Don't worry, my darling." he tells you, as he finally - oh finally! - caresses you right there, stroking you from above your leggings and despite the fabric he can feel your arousal, "You're soaked, baby girl." he says as he also feels his excitement growing more and more.

"Joel, please--" you groan instinctively closing your legs feeling a powerful arousal in contact with his hand.

"Please what?" he asks.

"Touch me, please," you beg him feeling yourself on fire. Joel can hardly believe his ears, he never thought he would hear that almost desperate tone coming from your lips, he never thought he could want you so badly.

"Open your legs."

You comply, unable to resist and eager to try more.

"Good girl." he tells you, kissing your cheek.

His hand languidly caresses that hypersensitive area still covered between your legs. You jerk, but do not retreat.

"Will ya let me touch you without these on?" he asks you. You can always reconsider, he thinks, but you don't, even.

"I'll do anything you want," you squeak, lost in this boiling sea of sensations.

You hear him smile, "Take off your leggings and sit back in the same position." he tells you.

You open your eyes feeling your legs go soft and your body shot through with an electricity you had never felt up to that moment, you stand and lower your leggings with trembling hands, then sit back down as he had ordered you. You're certainly all flushed, but you can't pull back, not now.

"Good girl." he repeats, immediately finding your lips and kissing you languidly again, with one hand reaching down to caress your left thigh, while with his other hand he strokes you for a moment over your fabric feeling your soaked intimacy.

"All this for me?" he says when he realizes the condition you are. He doesn't wait for an answer to slip his hand inside your fabric and caressing slowly your vulva spreading your arousal along it. The mere contact with his fingers is enough to make you close your eyes again and drop your head against his shoulder.

You almost jump when you feel him stroking your outer lips with two fingers.

"I'll take care of you and your pussy, don't worry. Relax. I'm going to give you your first orgasm." he tells you, at this moment a tsunami could come, an earthquake, the world could collapse, but you wouldn't care, not if Joel Miller, the man who has been able to take you and ravish you from almost the very beginning, is touching you like that "What I'm going to do," he explains, "is touch you here. " laying a calloused fingertip almost at the top of your cunt "This is the clit." he explains to you even though right now you don't perceive anything but his hands on you "It all starts here. All I'm going to do is touch you here, you don't have to do anything but let go and feel good." he goes on, stroking you there again, while with his other hand he lingers on your side as if to hold you still in that position.

He then goes back to touch you there, where he had told you, and you jerk from the incredible feeling, "Oh. Joel. I - I…" you groan, as he touches you firmly making very precise circular movements that make you tremble and shock you causing incredible shivers down your body "Joel… Joel… Joel…" is all you can say and think "It feels so good." you add between moans.

"Let go, honey," he says in your ear, as you almost wriggle against him abandoning yourself against his chest with your mouth open only able to moan disconnected phrases and moan.

"Fuck, that's it, you're perfect." you hear him say, as your orgasm, your first orgasm, explodes loudly inside you totally wrenching you.

You feel Joel slowly slow his movements until then the orgasm fades completely and your breathing becomes regular again and you open your eyes again. Only then you feel Joel kiss you gently behind your ear and whisper a you were perfect, darlin'. You would have blushed if you hadn't orgasmed for the first time in his arms and if you hadn't felt safe with him in a vulnerable moment like this.

As you regain contact with reality, you feel something incredibly hard pressing against your buttocks, you know what it is, I mean you know because of the science books, you look up into his face. He smiles at you, but his face is tense as if he has to do something but is holding himself back from doing it.

"How ya feel?" he asks, giving you a kiss at the corner of your mouth.

"Fine. And you?" you ask him even though it may be a silly question to ask.

"Fine." he answers you, but his tone of voice is strained.

You can't help yourself and turn your gaze back to his obvious arousal, he realizes it "That's my cock, you know what is it, right?" you nod nervously looking away from that intimate part of him "Don't worry, it's not time yet." he tells you noticing the surely nervous expression in your eyes.

"But you are--" aroused, visibly aroused.

"Yes, well…that happens if I do certain things and if you wiggle against me like you did just a few minutes ago," he explains.

You nod.

"I'm sorry," you tell him, "I wish I were experienced, I wish I could … satisfy you like you did with me."

"Don't think about that for now, honey." he tells you, placing a kiss on the tip of your nose "Now get down and close your eyes." he adds, making you stand up for a moment and get to your feet.

You immediately resign and obey by resting your head on the sofa cushion "Why?" you ask him with your heart still in your throat and your chest still rising and falling quite fast.

He moves the guitar so that you are fully relaxed "The first orgasm can be a very strong experience." he replies. Standing there, his erection - despite his jeans - is clearly visible and you can't help but look at it, feel drawn to it. "Rest now." he adds, letting his gaze wander down your body for a moment, then he gives you a smile and walks away, returning shortly with a blanket and placing it on you.

You can only say thank you, then you fall into a deep sleep.

Joel never thought he could get so aroused, sure he thought about you in those terms, but he never thought he would need to masturbate as he did at that moment, you are deeply asleep downstairs, he's in the bathroom clutching his erection in a fist and with precise movements pleasuring himself. He thinks back to your delicious moans, the sweet and sensual way you said his name, how he felt your orgasm occurs around his finger, your incredible sweetness and innocence despite the erotic moment you had just spent together. He comes in very few moments, violently, with his eyes closed and a hand over his mouth to muffle that long moan coming out of his mouth. Then he goes to the shower, thinking that he is officially fucked, completely crazy about you.

When you wake up, you realize it's dark, the lights of the street lamps barely illuminate the living room, and the flames in the fireplace are getting fainter and fainter. You sit up and see next door on the coffee table your leggings. You move the blanket and slip them on. You think back to the incredible moment you experienced, how many times you heard your friends talking about their orgasms and how they had not liked it, how they had not been able to come, you didn't know if you had come, but for sure the feeling it had left you was beautiful, unparalleled, Joel could have taken advantage of it and told you that - since he was aroused too - he wanted to be satisfied, but he hadn't. Gina had told you at least twice about how she had masturbated and performed oral sex and therefore you had a vague idea of how it should have been done, but having never done it you are afraid of making a mistake and being teased, you think.

At that moment, you smell coffee and shortly afterwards Joel's footsteps approaching.

"Good afternoon." he tells you with a small tray in his hands and placing it on the coffee table next to you, then he turns on a small lamp near the TV so you can see better.

"Good afternoon, but what time is it?" you ask a little confused looking for your cell phone without finding it.

"Almost six." he answers you "Actually I took the phone." he adds looking at you guiltily "I put it in the kitchen, I just wanted to let you rest. Sorry I took the liberty."

At other times maybe you would have been angry, but not now, not with Joel looking at you with those sweet eyes "It's okay." you say smiling at him "What did you make?" you ask curiously looking at the tray.

"For me a coffee, for you - this crap that someone bought" with someone alludes to you "and had me set up in the pantry." he says. From the smell it looks like your beloved tea that you made him buy when you went shopping.

You smile, "Thank you for remembering."

"For my sweet and perfect pupil this and much more," he says winking at you and moving closer to give you a kiss on your forehead. Only then, you notice that he's wearing another pair of jeans and his hair is a total mess, you wonder if he's washed and if he happened to pleasure himself after you fell asleep. The image of him pleasuring himself makes you nibble your lower lip.

You look at his face for a brief moment, then turn your attention to the tea you take and drink slowly, it's so good. You love it, you would drink this tea all the time.

You remain silent the whole time you drink the tea and he drinks his coffee, you don't know what to say, what do you say after he gives you your first orgasm?

You have no idea.

It's fortunately him who interrupts that awkward silence and asks you, "How ya feel?"

You tighten your lips "Good...I've never felt anything like that." you confide to him with a downcast gaze "Not even the other day when I thought about you..." you blurt out.

He raises an eyebrow "The other day you thought about me and...?"

"Um ... I ... well ..."

Why didn't you hold your tongue?

"I'm listening." he says as he sits down next to you and slips the cup from your hands to place it on the coffee table.

You breathe deeply and tell him that the other day, when you were alone in your house, for the first time you had the urge and desire to touch yourself thinking about him. You are certain, you are redder than a tomato, but by now you have said it.

He caresses your jaw in a slow gesture, then lingers on your lower lip in an equally gentle, slow gesture that again makes you shivers down your body and kisses you. It's a different kiss from the one before while he was touching you; it's a gentle yet languid kiss.

He interrupts the kiss by looking at you with those brown eyes and says, "We'd better stop here for today." you immediately get the hint and so you can't help but nod.

"Joel, I just wanted to tell you that I felt safe with you and that what happened here, I don't think I would have done it with anyone else," you tell him hoping he understands that by that someone else you allude to Jack.

He nods and then pulls you to him and squeeze you into a tight hug. You find yourself closing your eyes and dropping your head into the crook of his neck, you couldn't feel safer: him holding you in his arms wrapping you completely and you breathing in his scent. Yes, you would stay here forever.

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once-upon-an-imagine · 1 year

Note

Oh no aww I’m so sorry you’re having a rough day 🥺I know it’s gonna feel awful for a while, but take a second for yourself to take deep breaths and remember good things will be coming your way soon! I like to keep a little jar filled with sticky notes that have happy memories on them— whenever I’m down, I pick a few out of the jar to calm me down and keep me hopeful! I hope something like that helps!

If you’re still searching for hurt/comfort requests, I just thought of one for wolfstar x reader; I had a very close family member pass away recently, so I’ve been throwing myself into work to keep my mind busy and not think about them too much. I was thinking of a wolfstar x fem!reader idea where she also has just lost a loved one and almost unhealthily spends all her time and energy on schoolwork. I can imagine the boys becoming very concerned and taking her away from her studies so she can grieve properly, and they can comfort her (lots of warm blankets, snuggles, forehead kisses, hair stroking, reading books, fireplace, hand holding, etc.)

Please don’t feel obligated to write this ^, it’s only a suggestion if it inspires you! I hope your week gets better! 🤍

I am so sorry for your loss, love 🤍 I hope this helps at least one tiny bit, I loved this request and for it to be Wolfstar just made it even more perfect. thank you so much for your kind words, they made me feel so much better and I love the sticky notes idea, I definitely will be trying that Warnings: reader deals with death of a loved one Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter 😊 gifs aren’t mine 😁

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Take Care Of You

"I told you she would be here!" Sirius complained as he and Remus walked over to the furthest table in the Library where you were surrounded by mountains of books.

"Just, calm down Sirius, okay? She doesn't need you snapping at her right now" Remus tried to calm him down as they got closer to you. You not even noticing they were there. "Love?"

You looked up from your parchment to find your boyfriends standing there.

"What are you two doing here? I'm supposed to meet you at the Great Hall for dinner-"

"You missed dinner" Sirius said, sitting on one of your sides as Remus took the other. "You skipped it. Again" he told you.

"Oh" you said, going back to your parchment. "Sorry, I just lost track of time. I'll go grab something and then meet you-"

"No. We're leaving. Now" Remus told you, making you look up at him, confused.

"B-but, I'm not done-" you started saying as Sirius closed your book and started gathering your things inside your bag. "Siri!"

"We don't care" he told you. "You need to eat something and you need to get some rest. It's been enough!"

"Enough what?"

"Sweetheart" Remus said, turning your attention to him. "We know what this is about, and we have been trying to be considerate and give you your space and let you deal with it, but this isn't healthy" he said, worriedly.

"What do you mean? I'm just trying to get some work ahead-"

"No, you're not, princess" Sirius said, grabbing your trembling hand. "You're trying to do whatever you can to distract yourself" he said. "You're not sleeping. You're not eating. You're working all the time. You're pushing us away and this is not something you have to go through alone, love. We want to be here for you" he said with pleading eyes.

"We just want to help you through this, love" Remus said, holding your other hand. "Y-you" he sighed. "You haven't even cried" he muttered.

You looked down at your hands that were each being held by one of your boyfriends. You knew they were right. You had lost one of the most important people in your life. You felt like a piece of you was missing and it was never going to come back. But if you said it out loud, if you admitted it, it would be real. They would be gone forever.

"I just..." you started, still not facing them. The two of them looked at each other, hoping that this was it. "I just feel like if I start crying... I won't be able to stop" you said, with your voice breaking and a few tears finally rolling down your cheeks.

"Oh, princess" Sirius said, moving closer to you, wrapping your arms around you as Remus did the same. And then, you finally let go. Whatever you had been trying to keep inside, you weren't able to do it any longer.

""It's okay, sweetheart" Remus said, kissing your head repeatedly. "We're here, love" he whispered.

"I'm sorry" you said, wiping away the remaining tears.

"Honey, you have nothing to apologize for" Sirius said, lifting your head so you could face them.

"Yes, I do. I didn't want to worry you" you told them.

"Oh, love we always worry about you" Remus said, kissing your cheek. "That's our job" he assured you.

"Come on, love. Let's go" Sirius said, getting up and pulling you up with him as Remus grabbed your bag and carried it for you.

Sirius wrapped his arm around your shoulder, kissing your temple. The three of you walked out of the Library and you noticed Sirius was carrying a picnic basket. You thought you would make your way to the Gryffindor tower but you found yourself in the Room of Requirement where blankets and pillows were everywhere. You also saw a record player in the corner and Remus gave you your favorite combination of his and Sirius' pajamas. After you changed, you finally had something to eat in what felt like days and then you were cuddled between the two of them, resting your head on Remus' chest as he read to the two of you, Sirius with his arms wrapped around your waist, stroking your hair softly as quiet music played in the background.

For the first time in what felt like forever, you smiled. You loved them so much and you had no idea what you would do without them.

"Thank you" you whispered, making Remus look at you. Sirius was already sound asleep with his face buried in your neck.

"You don't have to thank us sweetheart" Remus said, leaning down to kiss your forehead. "Try to sleep a little, okay? We'll be here" he assured you, closing the book and bringing you closer to him. "I love you so much" he said, as you closed your eyes.

"I love you too, Remmy" you replied, smiling when you felt Sirius tightening his arms around you. "You too, Siri" you said before he kissed your shoulder.

The End

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A/N: hope you loves liked it!

#marauders #marauders imagine #sirius black #remus lupin #wolfstar #sirius black imagine #remus lupin imagine #wolfstar imagine #sirius black x reader #remus lupin x reader #wolfstar x reader #sirius balck dialogue #remus lupin dialogue #wolfstar dialogue

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belethlegwen · 16 hours

Text

Real Life, Sorry

How do I tell some of my best friends in the world that I am leaving them?

Like, specifically it's a work thing. I love these girls to bits and pieces. If I could handle it, if I could keep it up, if I could roll the dice with them and take these gambles that the year keeps throwing at all of us, I would. Over and over again, I would.

I signed paperwork today. I agreed to a job offer at another location. It's different; it's probably not going to be 'as good' in so many ways as what I have/had with these guys. But it's going to be easier. It's going to be stable. It's what I need for the next year; maybe the next two.

Two of the girls I've spoken to about it, but it was before it was fully set in stone. Tomorrow I pay rent for my current place, and I feel like I need to be upfront and tell the business owner/person I rent from that I'm gonna be gone (before, technically) by the end of the month. I need to start telling my clients. I need to figure it all out.

It's terrifying. For all the not-great parts of the last four years, these girls are the reason I survived the pandemic and the reason I was able to do what I do and love for this long. I'm still going to do what I love! There will be less control, but again: sometimes you need to let another person take the wheel for a while and just ride.

I don't know that I've ever left a job where I was missed after I went. I don't know that there's been a job I've left where there wasn't just... resentment or something for me in the wake of me going, no matter how it happened. Maybe that's just the paranoia, maybe that's just my anxiety, but I'm terrified it'll happen this time. I'm terrified at least one of them will see it as some kind of betrayal; that I'm abandoning them while all of this shit is going on.

I love them.

I'll miss them.

Maybe they won't miss me.

Maybe these pipe dreams of getting through the next year alive and being able to reevaluate, reassess, and regroup with them and go back to this are just that.

But for a while we had the best thing I ever had and I have to tell myself I can always be thankful for it. For any bad, there was so so so much good. There will be good for me wherever I go; I'll make it good. I know I can. They've shown me I can.

Life changes. It feels like life won't stop changing; that it's all changing.

Normally when there are major periods of change in my life, I've previously had dreams of Orcas and dolphins. They haven't shown up this time. I don't know what to make of that. The dreams always involved me seeing them in the distance, or hearing of them, and not being able to get as close as I wanted to. Not being able to really see them. Maybe this time I'm more in control. Maybe this time it's not something running away from me.

I hope I get to see the Orcas, finally.

Sorry for the ramble and rant, I was exhausted when I got home at 5pm and made the mistake of slamming back a Monster Java. My feelings are everywhere.

#irl #feelings #work related #sorry for the ramble #not g/t related

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kanene-yaaay · 8 months

Text

Chasing Laughter

Kanene's Notes: Heyaa! Gosh, it's been a long time since I've been able to write and finish AND post a fic. But! I've got a new fandom >:D uytredrtyuidfg So, at first I didn't know a lot about Fit but GOSH, now he is one of my faves. Like, a guy that is trapped in a experiment controlled by a gigantic force that is not above torturing, experimenting and doing awful thing just to keep the control and yet this is the happier he had ever been? Because he has a wonderful son and friends? Because here, different from the world filled with war he came before, he at least knows a bit of peace? And he would do anything to still have this love, happiness and family he found? B r u h I am on the FLOOR Although, I still haven't watched a LOT of him so probably this is kind of OOC but yeah it is what it is dfghujuygtfrftgy

Warnings: None. This is pure flluff and plyaful tickles. Ticklish!Ramón and Ler!Fit. Around 1.000 words. General warning: this is a tickle fic

[~*~]

Ramón took off running.

It felt almost natural, now. He learned to run for his life a long time ago, nowadays being able to deal much better with all the thoughts his mind had to attend to. Where he should step, when he should keep going or try to hide, how far was his pursuer, what could he do to get just a few more seconds before help came…

At first, it wasn’t supposed to be a game, running away from someone more than often isn’t in his daily life. Not with the place that they lived. The island.

But, well…

The wind ruffled his hair and the adrenaline raced in his veins, heartbeat going in sync with his footsteps, painting in firm strokes and nimble steps determination in every turn and dodge. The voice that followed him on his path only served as a reminder that it was just a fun chase.

It was hard to not have fun when his father was involved.

“Ramooon, where are you? You can’t run forever, my baby boy.”

All of this was Dapper’s fault, really. He was a menace and immature and the one who didn’t know when to admit that he had lost the wrestling match and so decided to change to cheating so he could win. And no. It didn’t matter that technically Ramón had also cheated by sneaking up behind his twin and starting the play fight when the other was busy building. That is not cheating. This is being tactical and having a strategy . Cheating is resorting to unfair methods like throwing all your weapons and tools to the ground, shoving your hands under the enemy’s chestplate and squeezing their sides non stop.

Tickling isn’t even allowed in a real fight! Dapper doesn’t even expect the big storm that is coming to him, Ramón also has a lot of a very kind of giggly, tickly blackmail about his brother that he is more than happy to share with his uncle Bad.

He just needed to survive this chase first.

With the potato gun in his hand he turned around, firing. None of them hit the target, it was hard when both of them were moving so fast and inconsistently, full of zig zags, circles and jumps on the usual irregular soil.

“Ops, almost got me there, Ramon, but you can’t escape your father.”

Ramón almost laughed, almost cursed and almost tried to shoot another round of potatoes on his dad for being so embarrassing.

“You know I will always find you. Come here, my boy!”

In the end, he ended up stumbling.

His body didn’t even had the chance to fall on the grass before two hands, warm and kind. larger than life, full of scars that contained brave stories and strong enough to hold him dangling in the air in what his Tío Foolish liked to call the “Air Prison”, got him from behind.

“Oh! Oh!! I got you, I got youuuu, my beautiful, beautiful baby boy! Look what I have right in my hands, a cute little sneaker who thought that he could outrun his old man, huh? You love to see it.”

Ramón struggled on the hold, kicking and feeling his cheeks light up in flames at his father’s usual baby voice, trying to ignore with his entire might all the giggles crawling up his throat and the gigantic smile that fought to take over his mouth.

He was NOT going to lose this time! No matter how much embarrassing praises and unfair baby voices his own father attempted to pull against him, he would keep himself strong and simply not break!

(He always did. No matter how long they’ve played this game of hide and seek and chase, or how often his father’s eyes glinted in pure happiness when he saw him awake or even how the pride took over his words and gestures every time Ramón showed him his newer project. Everyday Ramon tried to keep his composure, his mature self in front of him as a shield and a preparation. Yet, every single day his dad came and let him act and feel like he was… like he could be just a child in front of him.)

All his thoughts came to a halt and got scrambled when suddenly he was thrown upwards and spun in the air, no time to get the grappling hook to escape the situation before Fit caught him again, now with both of them being able to face each other.

His father’s grin was as mischievous as big. Ramón huffed and squinted at him and did not pout at his destiny.

A couple of fingers sneaking under his armpits and digging there quickly made his grumpy demeanor melt in a loud squeak.

"Ohoho, what is this? Is that a smile that I am seeing right there? A big, bright and starry five stars smile, indeed."

Ramón shook his head, entire body shaking with the struggle of keeping the laughter inside. His hands attempted to push his father's hold away, but it would be much easier to try to move a mountain.

The fingers began crawling downwards, giving each rib a few quick, nimble scribble before focusing entirely on squeezing his sides, not being even slightly discouraged by the smaller’s tactic of trying to become a defensive ball, a couple of quiet yelps escaping when the scratching found a sweet spot right where his sides and ribs connected.

"I think someone's barrier is about to crack.~" Fit playful taunted.

A couple of giggles ran away without permission from his mouth, his smile growing from one ear to another as each tickle seemed to send a tingly, funny kind of adrenaline in his veins.

It took only single scribble on his stomach for everything, every squeal, giggly snort, squeaky wheeze and crackling to come trembling down from his mouth, filling the air with a loud, energetic laughter and a quiet, amused chuckle that danced together amidst the wind and the trees.

For a few moments that was all that existed, the silly, playful, tickly moment and genuine laughter. It lasted a couple of minutes before Fit decided they both already had their fun and that Ramón could use some of benefits of taking big, uninterrupted gulps of air.

"Okay, okay, enough. I don't want to take it too far." His father's movements weren't exactly gentle , still roughed in the edges by the life he had before the island, but he was the most careful as he let him on the ground and discreet enough to not snicker too loud when Ramón wobbled a bit on the same spot, left over sniggers still escaping and making his nose scrunch up. "Are you alright, Ramón?"

The kid just quietly wiped the beginnings of tears that formed in the corner of his eyes before, in a flash, grabbing his sword and quickly hitting his dad with a clear swing before jumping away.

"Wh- wha- what! Hey!" His voice was the perfect mix of amused and exasperated. Not a single drop of regret in it as the flames danced on his armor, barely even affecting him. "Now, come on…"

He stepped closer to the smaller one, only for Ramón to jump away once more and pull his spyglass, squinting at him in a clear show of protest.

(Of course both realized how the corner of his mouth was still up in a remain of a happy smile, how the swing was totally non harmful and how he would never, ever, truly run away from his father.)

"OK, OK, you're right, that was unfair of me." Ramón slightly bent his knees, hand still close to his sword, waiting for more. "What if we go clear that dungeon you mentioned earlier? Think you could forgive me then?"

The kid quickly put away his spyglass, stepping closer and nodding pleased. His father was smart. He knew he would stop being silly and see the reason, eventually.

Fit watched as his kid led the way, a pep on his step and a joyful hum in the tip of his tongue. His chest filled with warmth, realizing (not for the first or last time) how lucky he was to have all of this in his life.

He will do anything to keep this happiness, to keep them, alive.

[~*~]

Ramón may or may not strategically try to get his revenge in the future in front of a very curious and mischievous Brazilian (Pac really needed a Second to Breath when he heard Fit giggling for the first time, and, really, how could he just NOT help his sobrinho, ya know?) and ever since their life (and bit by bit the life of everyone in the island because rumors fly like crazy and not a single one in there isn't prone to some mischief) got filled with much more laughter and sillyness Just wanted to write some light-hearted fun

#qsmp tickles #qsmp tickling #Kanene's fic #Kanene's fanfic #Ticklish!Ramón #Ler!Fit #Tickle fic #Cute fluff #I forgot what to put in tags so SDFGHUJIKKJH #playful tickles #can't stop thinking about the beans Having Fun and Being Happy so i just had to write something rkjhgvfghnjm

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tetrakys · 1 year

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I think I have to clarify because I've seen some people misunderstand: I'm not working on a visual game, I can barely write fanfictions lol. I don’t work for Beemoov, and I'm doing nothing with or on behalf of the company. Chino and I are friends, we've been for two years now, she is well aware of how much of an Eldarya fan I am and how disappointed I have been in seeing the characters I love being twisted into something they are not since she stopped working on the game (she hasn’t been involved in ANE at all, except for the events).

I have been pestering her about making Alternate of Eldarya because I'm sure the whole fandom would be happy to have good quality content once the current season is over. However, because currently this doesn't seem possible, she told me the plot of what she would've done with a Lance and Valkyon Alternate. I am writing it on my AO3 in a fanfic/novel kind of format so it can be expanded into something pretty to read and not just a bullet point list, and I will also share it with you. If one day, by a miracle, the company decides to make Alternate Eldarya games, I will delete my writing because it would be the same story.

At the moment I haven't written a single line because my real life work keeps me busy and tired, I'm just making pinterest boards and playlists to give me inspiration (writer procrastination 101 lol I'll start during the weekend).

So yes, it's Chino's story, I am writing it and putting my spin to it, but I always check with her if what I have in mind is also something she has in mind. Luckily we have very similar tastes so our brains work in tandem.

#except I wanted to bring Miiko back so I could smooch Lance in her face but alas Chino said no #so Huah Hua it is #eldarya #about my writing #eldarya the dragon's call

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avpdvoidspace · 1 year

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I have avpd and I don’t trust myself regarding relationships. I have so much yearning for love and affection, because I feel lonely and I’m so touch starved. And with avpd making me feel unlovable, I often fantasize about the cliche of being saved. So I’m afraid that I’ll be too blind when I meet someone. And I often hear how I should love myself before someone else can love me. And how love won’t make my life better or make me happy, I need to make myself happy. Stuff like that. So now when I’m yearning I’m feeling stupid, and I’m wondering if it’s bad to yearn for love when it doesn’t exist in my life and hope that it would make me more satisfied with life. I have never known it, so I can’t compare it to anything. Is it stupid to try to find love and then it’ll just feel worse when I know what to miss when it’s gone? At least the pain I feel now is not based on anything real. Why can’t I just be content with my own little life? I try to keep myself busy and do things I like but it’s just so empty and I just wish I had someone to hold me once in a while. Is it stupid and delusional to have that yearning? How do I stop it?

"And I often hear how I should love myself before someone else can love me. And how love won’t make my life better or make me happy, I need to make myself happy." Honestly I think these sentiments hurt a lot of people who struggle with mental health, and the first one in particular has caused me a lot of fear, pain, and feelings of worthlessness. As far as I'm concerned, it's just not true that you have to love yourself before someone else can love you. For many people, they are loved before they even have a sense of self. The people who raise them give them love, which helps to build a foundation of self that they in turn can love. So the typical experience of being human is being loves before you can love yourself. Some of us don't get that. We might be cared for well enough to survive infancy but treated badly by guardians who resent our existence. We can't learn to love ourselves if we're treated with disdain from birth. And maybe we go a long time before someone shows us genuine love. A person like that could have a hard time loving themselves for the rest of their life. Do they not deserve to be loved? Would it not benefit them? That's the situation I find myself in. And it's more than just not loving myself. I often have hatred and contempt for myself. Being loved by other people actually helps me quite a bit in that regard. It's not easy, and I often feel undeserving of them or like they'd be better off without me, but the loving relationships I have do make my life much much better. I think you bring up a very valid issue--of feeling 'blind' when you meet someone. I've definitely been in a position where I think someone is one of my best friends and cares for me deeply only to find out they were using me or taking advantage of me (and queue a period of extreme self hatred for being 'stupid enough' to let someone in). Unfortunately that's a risk. My best advice for that is to give relationships time before you commit to them. A lot of time. Like two years at least, and at that point, reflect on the relationship. Don't be afraid to move on if it's not working for you, and if it is, that's great. And that goes for friendships as well as romantic relationships imo. Anyway, I definitely think people with avpd are deserving and worthy of relationships, even if we can never love ourselves. I resent the whole "you have to love yourself before anyone else can love you" thing. I think it's an incredibly damaging belief forced on us, often by people who haven't experienced growing up without love. And it's just absolutely not true.

#avpd #avoidant personality disoder

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wolfiemcwolferson · 10 months

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girl piarles, 25

Hi Dees, you didn't think I could forget about you, did you? (I love your laugh)

Charles is sitting next to Pierre, sun warm skin on sun warm skin.

She needs to put on more sunscreen - the high SPF stuff Pierre had plucked out of the display case from that tourist trap shop they had stopped in this morning, but they had needed it. Considering this was a spontaneous beach trip.

Charles had said she missed the sun on her skin - the brightness of Monaco and even though this wasn't Monaco or even Southern France, she thinks it's good enough. For today it's good enough.

Pierre is quiet, listening to the ocean and Charles is quiet, too busy watching Pierre listen to the ocean and the way it laps against the shore.

"We should do this for real." Pierre whispers. "We should go to Monaco next month."

Charles wants to say no immediately because they don't have time to go to Monaco next month. They have too many things to do - things are building for the both of them and -

Pierre starts to laugh, twisting to face Charles, brushing a piece of her hair away from. her face. "Do you remember what I said? About enjoying life. You haven't been home since Christmas, calamar."

A laugh bubbles up in Charles throat, but it comes out all sideways and a little bitter, because she knows that. She knows she hasn't been home since Christmas. That's why they're here today. That's why they've come to the beach today. Because Charles had been crying last night about missing her sisters and her mom and the way that Monaco glitters at night.

Pierre's face goes all blank and then she chews on her lower lip, reaching out for Charles' hand, taking it between her two. "Don't. You know I love your laugh. But your real laugh. Don't do that." And then she looks away from Charles' face, lip back between her teeth. "I just want to do something nice for you."

Charles is all mixed up again - feeling like she's falling behind all of her peers, feeling like she feels too much, feeling like what she feels for Pierre isn't the same that Pierre feels for her, feeling like she's ruined this day by having emotions or saying something wrong or -

"Charles," Pierre whispers, rearranging herself so she's closer to Charles, one long, tan leg stretched out on one side of Charles' body, pressing against Charles' much paler leg. "Let me do something nice for you. You have worked so hard and you deserve a break."

The hand Pierre slides up Charles' thigh is shaky and Charles watches it while holding her breath.

"I want to hear that laugh that I love." Pierre whispers - barely audible over the waves and the family a dozen meters from them and Charles' own thundering heartbeat. "And I want you to know that I would give you anything."

"Pierre -" Charles manages to breathe out, but stops because Pierre has one finger hooked underneath her chin, dragging her eyes back up to Pierre's face.

Pierre's face is so full of earnest wanting - so open and full of love. "Anything."

Charles swallows hard, considers, tries not to overthink, tries to remember what Pierre is always telling her. "You can take me to Monaco."

Pierre's nose crinkles up. "Okay, I can take you to Monaco." And then she looks like she's going to back away - looks like she's going to lean back so Charles' snatches her wrist in his hand to keep her close.

"You can kiss me too." It's the boldest thing she's ever said and it's the most she's ever admitted to wanting out loud.

"Yes," Pierre smiles, leaning closer. "I can kiss you too."

#piarles #girl piarles #dees i don't know either baby

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worryingthing · 6 months

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I got a 9 to 5 (well, 8 to 6 with commute) and I've been struggling with the overall change. It's hard to stay positive in this current climate, and I feel like I am going insane every time I glance at social media or the news. But I guess having a gig means I'm busy, or at least occupied, which is helpful as much as I resent it. Life in Queens is great but everything does still feel a little foreign and far off. The weather being so dramatic has not helped either, I am very unhappy about having to pull out my tights and sift through which pairs have holes or can still be worn (70% had holes and Uniqlo stopped making their heat tech tights in Navy - guess I'll die, etc).

Anyway, I can feel my spirit being worn down by office lighting, small talk, k cups, how absolutely shitty the R train is, and people having speakerphone conversations on the bus and train at 8 a.m. All of it. So I wanted to return to a practice of gratitude to remind me to maybe stave off a little despair. I was really enjoying my tarot pulls when my life had a lot more uncertainty (does he like me? turns out, yes!! Will I ever get a job? Yeah, but now it's my whole life and I am always tired) Anyway in an act of anger at me for being gone from my home for most of the day now, Leelou (one of my cats) threw up on my tarot deck! A card or two is worse for the wear and I haven't decided if I am going to replace it or try to keep working with it just yet.

anyway!

I found a good smash burger in the neighborhood!! Petey's. It's perfect. The relief I feel at having discovered this is immense.

also food (I'm a Taurus?!) but I went to King of Falafel after hopping off the 30th ave stop. Sam had pointed it out to me when we walked to the train and it had a 15-minute wait so we walked a little further and he pointed out some things I hadn't seen since I live off a different stop. The falafel was probably the best I've ever had and it was beautiful to stand in a Palestinian restaurant so proud of its heritage. There was a wait for pita so I waited and was rewarded with a bonus piece, which was so warm and fluffy and heavenly to tear into on my walk back home. I will definitely be going back.

Access Oasis Garden, which my friend Kate founded. Right now we're focused on showing the Parks department and community that we're committed as a group so on Saturday I got to be a part of some bulb planting. To put something in the ground as a gift for future enjoyment is so rewarding, and signifies a deep hope, I feel. I am so astounded by how quickly things have moved and I can't wait to see it grow further. I also got to make some new friends, who ended up coming to the soup event at the beer hall after the planting was done. It was a really beautiful day of community!

Good hugs from friends! getting to share in the joy of a friend's good news.

Sam, who is so understanding and gentle and thoughtful. I'm still like, wait what, is this real? It turns out I am all about clear communication and intent! It's great!

Becoming emboldened re: work snacks, speaking of it is almost time for me to sneak some hummus at my desk. Sometimes on my lunch, I browse the dollar store candy section just to amuse myself, which is how I ended up with a desk drawer full of tootsie rolls.

Radio.Garden. I do sometimes browse the map endlessly, and I love to visit the station websites! I have found a few stations that originated as in-hospital or nursing home stations but graduated to internet broadcasts. Many stations I stumble upon are community-founded, which I love to see because I find the idea of radio of course extremely romantic, but also hopeful. It is also a perfect tool if you're not sure what you want to listen to - which happens to me a lot as someone who experiences intense decision paralysis. There's a station on the west coast of France that plays classical before lunch and jazz after. I began my work morning with AshiyaRadio, a Japanese jazz station.

for some reason, my rosacea goes nuts at work (I turn pink when dehydrated) but I bought this mini Tower 28 rescue spray and it seems to help a little, plus I like how refreshing it feels. Let me just anoint my visage real quick in this office hell space, etc

Tears of the Kingdom - which is soooo immense it's overwhelming but I have been enjoying dropping in and trying to further along my journey with various side quests. It's a perfect game to just meander around in, every last detail is stunning. I should remind myself I can take my switch on my work commute!!

Seemingly breezing through a lot of big changes with minimal anxiety?? I have been complaining a lot about how exhausted I've been but it's my fourth week and I had to learn/memorize A LOT the first two, so now it's slightly more routine and less overwhelming. I had one crying meltdown during the height of my period and missed a group of friends out, but I am pretty sure I needed that cry and it was unavoidable.

I know what's for dinner (the relief!): the half package of pumpkin ravioli I splurged on from the store and half a head of broccoli. I finish both in sage brown butter, toasted breadcrumbs, parmesan, and lemon. Still have to figure out a work lunch, though ):

Sometimes it's really hard to tell if these sorts of things are even worth posting or just too navel-gazy, but I stuck with it and I'm posting and my outlook on life does feel improved, surprisingly. I'm also not in talk therapy because how can that even happen with my new schedule? So writing it out it is.

#tyn #November #tumblr on desktop at work!

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prehistoric-duo · 16 days

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HELLO ROTOMBLR!!

It's your favorite MewTube Paleontologist Power-Couple, finally making an account on a social media site that isn't MewTube!

This is Taire- if you couldn't tell by my charming energetics (AKA Arnie didn't feel like making our introduction post lol).

I figure some of you don't really know who we are, if you don't find this blog from our description links, so why not talk about it real quick?

As I've said before, I'm Taire! I use he/him pronouns, and I'm 27 years old. Which, in my opinion, is actually not that old because I've worked with rocks older than uh. literally humanity? I have three Pokemon-

Rafflesia the Venusaur (She/her)

Geode the Sandslash (They/them)

Onoi the Omastar (They/them)

Here's my trainer card:

Arnie uses they/he pronouns, and is 26! He is like. My favorite person in the whole wide world and I love him so so so much and YES me gushing about him is a regular occurrence irl and in private. They also have three Pokemon-

Pablo the Torterra (They/them)

Grey the Aggron (They/Them)

Shelley the Carracosta (She/her)

Here's their trainer card:

We've been doing MewTube for about 3 years now, and married for 5! We work for an organization called The New Epoch Foundation as, you guessed it, paleontologists! The goal of the organization is to help further scientific research and runs mostly on donations! I might also end up as their head of social media because of the stuff we do on MewTube, we'll just have to see!

Of course, we can't forget about Baby Helix, we had them about a year ago and we love them so so much. We don't really post pictures of them, but maybe in the future? We aren't like. A family vlogging channel anyways (chills). We'll both sign off our posts!

Feel free to send us asks and pelipper mail! I'm hoping to be able to interact with the fans more this way :)

Hi! Mod here, just call me Vessel! ooc text from me will be red

My other blog is @canesvenatici-ribbons! But this blog is going to be more plot-based than slice of life ;)

A couple of ground rules:

1- I operate on DND and Improv rules: "yes and" and be respectful to other players.

That doesn't mean NO anon hate or whatever, it just means that if someone is playing a character in a way that makes me uncomfortable, I'm probably not going to interact with you. If the anon hate is egregious I'm going to stop responding to it, etc.

Typically I try to just go "yes and" to stuff, it's more fun to me that way and adds a layer of unpredictability to my stories- BUT- please DM me if you want to do BIG plot stuff (I don't bite!)

But if something makes me uncomfortable I won't do it, feel free to ask prior though if you want confirmation! If it's like. An overly dark subject matter I probably won't do it though.

2- No Magic anons or anon hate related to their identities please!

This is my one hard-stop! everything else like sentient pokemon, pelipper mail, regular anons, anon hate, is all fine right now!

3- Feel free to remind me to respond to a post or ask if I haven't gotten to it in about two days! I'm a college student and I'm really busy. I do this mostly for fun but I do really appreciate reminders. adhd brain

4- I want to confirm this rq cause I know people will ask about it- Helix is their biological child, one of them is trans but no actual like. Pregnancy is gonna be shown or mentioned on this blog because they think it's funny to keep it up in the air on who had Helix or if Helix is adopted. Trans families (no matter what kind) and seahorse dads are just. Very important to me as I am a trans guy/trans masc who wants kids myself one day. I expect you all to be respectful and mature about this. People who make M///pr///eg jokes and/or comments will be blocked and deleted.

Literally it's only funny with people I'm close with so if I don't know you, don't do that. This is my one other hard stop

Asks about who had Helix though- and speculation on if Helix is adopted, is encouraged and very funny!

I do plan on having actual references for the family done up at some point, I just haven't had the time or resources for it quite yet. But for now, here are their picrews + short add on descriptions! (Minus Baby Helix)

Taire:

Blue, Feathery hair, Oddly sharp teeth

Red, scaley patches of skin has grown in the three years of making videos- they started out small and almost unnoticeable and now it's beginning to take up their face.

Arnie:

DO NOT let this picrew fool you. Arnie is a large fat man. They also have a full beard that is not pictured.

Hair has turned white in the past few years. Blue Patch of skin over eye and looks strangely smooth, has only appeared since last year

#rotomblr #pokemon #pokeblogging #pokeblog rp #pokeblr #intro post #Taire :)

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chnets · 6 months

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The real reason (Hannibal x Will)

This is my first fic I've ever posted, so I'm open to criticism and I'd be happy to take requests if you've got them!

7:30pm. Baltimore, Maryland.

Will arrived at Hannibal's office and slumped down on the seat in the waiting area with a heavy sigh. He had lost track of how many evenings he spent wasting away in front of his computer working on the Chesapeake Ripper case. He decided to make an appointment with Dr. Lecter before his mental health started to spiral again.

Hannibal opened the door to his office and greeted Will with an unusually warm smile. "Hello Will. Please, come in." He gestured towards the doorway and Will hauled himself off the chair and briskly walked to the couch He always sat on, discarding his coat and bag on the floor.

"How have you been since our last session?" Hannibal inquired as he poured two glasses of whiskey.

"Busy." He stated, seeming uninterested in the question.

"I see, I've heard agent Crawford is making you work long hours on the Chesapeake Ripper case. "You must be starting to burn out." Dr. Lecter replaced the whiskey bottle on the shelf and placed the two glasses on the coffee table in front of them. Will swirled the drink around in the glass before downing it in one go, leaving him coughing with a burning in the back of his throat. Hannibal looked him in the eye with a hint of concern, quickly replaced by a fascination.

"Haven't slept much this week. Nightmares of the crime scenes are keeping me up." Will confesses

"I see, have you made any major progress in the case recently?" Hannibal questioned.

"I have, but nobody believes my theory after all this time." Will looks into his empty glass with annoyance tainting his expression.

"And what is your theory?" Dr. Lecter pushed. He enjoyed seeing the inner workings of Will's mind. He enjoys studying how he came to be. And how he can be altered.

"That you're the Chesapeake Ripper."

"And what led you to that conclusion?" The doctor questioned, taking a sip of his drink.

"You already know Hannibal. I told you I knew back in the hospital. But it was your word against mine."

“You weren’t of sound mind then Will.”

“It was sound enough to know you’re a murderer.”

The two men sat in silence for a moment, unsure how to continue the conversation.

“You interest me, Will.”

“How so?”

“You don’t operate how others do.”

“I’m well aware of that, Doctor.”

Hannibal sat in another moment of silence, trying to formulate a way to ask this question without making Will shut down completely.

“Will?”

“Yes?”

“Do you want to know the real reason I was so interested in your case?”

“I know why, you found the way I think and how my encephalitis impacted that very fascinating. You told me already.”

“There’s another reason.”

Will froze in his seat. He knew Hannibal planned to kill him at some point, why else would he befriend Will in a way he knew was unnatural to the Doctor?

He just didn’t know tonight was the night his life was going to end.

Will sprang up from his place on the couch and bolted for the door. Hannibal stopping him by grabbing his wrist.

“Wait.”

“Please.”

Will turned to face Hannibal with trembling hands and looked directly into the eyes of a killer. But the Doctor’s eyes weren’t filled with the kind of murderous glint he knew all too well.

His eyes were soft. Kind. Loving even.

“I was interested in you in more ways than a professional manner.”

“Me too.” Will confesses.

They held eye contact for a moment, a peaceful stillness filling the air surrounding them. Will took Hannibal’s face in his hands and gave him a small raise of his eyebrows, as if to ask permission, the Doctor nodded and Will leaned in to gently place a kiss on the man’s lips.

At that moment, Hannibal finally felt whole for the first time in over a decade. He leaned back in and kissed Will like it was his last day on Earth. Will returning the kiss as his hands find their place on his waist and the small of his back.

This continues until the two men are left breathless on the couch Will previously occupied talking about his innermost thoughts. Clothes long forgotten on the floor of the office. Hannibal and Will sharing their first genuine laugh since Will was released from the hospital.

Will glances up at the clock on the wall and sees it’s gone past 10pm.

“Shit, I should probably get going, I have work in the morning.”

He notices a flash of disappointment wash over the Doctor’s face.

“I’ll be back tomorrow Hannibal.”

“For therapy or me?”

"Both."

#hannibal #hannibal nbc #hannigram #will graham x hannibal lecter #oneshot #fanfic

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jadeee · 7 months

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Vendetta Ch. 12, Part 1: Cloudy Days

📰 read chapters 1 - 11 here!

Warnings: angst, slight swearing & mentions of murder

Word Count: 3.9k

"Oh my God!" You squealed as you hovered over Nicky's shoulder. He spent the last five minutes reading MJ's published piece about the two of you:

While the world gawks at the Valentinos and their upcoming case, the pair find safety and shelter in each other. Most importantly, love which is the greatest comfort of all. They continue to curate a happy home and lovely life in which they celebrate the good, the bad, and the ugly.

"We should frame this."

He set the paper aside "You wanna hang it up in the hall?"

"Why not?!"

"Okay, I've got an idea. How about we get out of this house?"

"Hm.."

"Oh c'mon," he got up from the couch and took your hands in his "we've been hermit crabs until last night."

You chuckled as he pulled you off the couch and into his arms.

"Don't you want to come out of your shell?"

"Okay," you said with a hint of defeat "where do you want to go today?"

"How about the tennis court? I haven't exercised in ages."

"You went for a swim in the pool a few days ago!"

"It's not the same!" He pouted playfully "C'mon, I'll get the rackets and everything else. Just get ready."

He kissed your forehead again before disappearing up the stairs.

Agnes stood outside of Martin's office, "Sir?"

"What?" He asked with an underlying annoyance.

"Your wife is on the line. I told her you were busy but she knows I'm lying."

"Of course she does." He took a deep breath as if bracing himself for a punch from a heavy hitter "Put her on."

"... yes, sir."

His hand rested on the phone in his office and immediately picked it up when it rang. The speaker rested near his lips but he was quiet, timid, and scared all at once.

"Martin? Martin, I know you're there." The woman said on the other end "How are you?"

He licked his lips to wet them since they were suddenly dry, "How do you think?"

She sighed "You can't keep doing this. Why don't you just come home?"

"Why haven't you signed the divorce papers?" He spat back then wiped his lips regretfully.

The line was suddenly silent except for the soft breathing of the woman on the other end.

"Teddy, sign the damn papers."

"You haven't called me that in months."

A crimson red blossomed on his cheeks, "I-- I know."

"I'm surprised you still remember my name."

"Oh Theodora, don't get smart with me!"

"I'm just saying!"

"Just stop it, alright."

"Okay..."

They enjoyed a comfortable silence until she broke it "So--"

"No." he found himself picking at a chip on his wooden desk.

"Sweetheart..."

Tears stung in his eyes as he continued to pick at the spot and held the phone to his ear. He didn't want to hang up but he couldn't bear another second. "Teddy, please."

"What happened.. it's not your fault. We can still be a family. I can turn the nursery into a room for a dog." She chuckled half-heartedly and sniffled.

Martin wiped a fallen tear from his eye "A dog isn't gonna fix this."

"I know but it's not your fault."

"Then how do you explain it? If I didn't take that case, you wouldn't have lost the baby," He shrunk back at his outburst. Hearing the words bounce off the walls made it real again and he felt himself start to crack.

"Martin," she sniffled again and went silent "the doctor said it was only a matter of time."

"Ted-- Theodora, I can't do this. I don't want to put you in danger and you can't be in a stressful environment. That's all this job is and as much as I love you, I can't leave it."

"I don't want you to."

"... just sign the papers, please."

He moved his hand an inch away from his face then brought the phone back to his lips. "I love you. Truly, I do." As his lips stringed together more to say, the sentence fell apart so he hung up the phone. Whatever he felt for his soon-to-be ex-wife, he pushed it deep down to focus on his work.

"Agnes, I don't want to hear from her unless it's an emergency! You got it?"

"I understand."

He fished something out of his shirt pocket then looked at the golden ring before putting it in his desk drawer.

Flo led MJ towards her surprise with his hands over her eyes.

"Flo, what is this?" She laughed with each slow step forward "Why does it smell like..."

"Surprise!" He lifted his hands and she saw the dinner that was spread out on the table.

"I remember one day you said 'when I make it big I want a big boss dinner with lobster and potatoes' so..."

He laughed at his poor impression of her as he gestured to the exquisite dinner he made for her and gauged her reaction. She was silent and unmoving until finally, she turned around and hugged him tightly. The impact nearly threw him off his balance. He grabbed onto a nearby chair to steady himself then hugged her back and smiled.

"Thank you," she muttered against him.

"You deserve it."

She let go of him and recomposed herself "Now, let's eat!"

The two had already shared more than a few laughs as time went by.

"So now that you're a big shot, are you going to forget about me?" Flo teased as he ate a bread roll.

"No!" Bea shook her head "You're one of the few people who believed in me. Besides, who else is going to visit my office."

"Is it still bring your own box to sit on?"

"Actually, I have two chairs now." She grinned and Flo's brows jumped up.

"Did they give you an office?!"

She nodded as she ate some more of her lobster.

"Holy-- that's amazing!" Flo smiled "Does it have those big glass windows?!"

She laughed as she went on to explain her recent promotion at work and what her new life was starting to look like.

As the night progressed, you were playing a game of cards with Nicky and losing horribly.

"Ah, damn!" You threw down your hand after seeing Nicky's winning one.

"Let me give you some tips or something. I'm starting to feel bad."

"Be honest, you're actually loving this right now."

He threw his hands up while you continued your banter. It would've carried on but the phone rang and Nicky offered to get it.

"Yeah, give me a chance to prepare for a rematch."

"You do that!" He teased.

The smile he had lingered on his face as he picked up the phone, "Hello? Who's this?"

"It's Martin."

Nicky's smile started to drop "What's going on?"

"They found a body in New York. It might be Maurizio. They're doing the testing now. I just thought I should let you know."

He nodded, unsure of what to say next.

"If this is it, then we got Floyd. I talked to some people and Maurizio may not be the only one."

"What?"

"You ever heard of Umberto Gavassi?"

A sudden pit had formed in Nicky's stomach "Yeah, I know who he is."

"Y'know if he's still alive?"

"I have no idea. I tried to forget about New York and everything with it. We see how that turned out."

"Hm.. my work's just getting started over here but things are looking up for us."

"Did you get in touch with his mother?"

Martin went quiet for a moment "I'm waiting until it's confirmed. I don't want to waste her time if it's not him."

"Right..." Nicky glanced at the floor then back to the distant room you were in.

"I'll call you when I know the results."

"Okay."

Martin and Nicky hung up at the same time. Both were thankful for the end of the conversation but unwilling to know the truth. He walked back into the room with a solemn step. You rearranged the cards in your hand "Alright, I'm ready this time. I laid everything out."

You glanced up at him and the light in your eyes dimmed. "What happened?"

"That was Martin." Nicky sat on the couch near where you sat on the floor. Where you two were happily playing cards moments ago.

"They found a body in New York and it may be Maurizio's. They're testing it now to see." He looked right past you.

"Hey," you scooted over in front of him and rested your hands on his legs. "Nicky?" you crossed your arms over his thighs and rested your head there. "We'll wait then, okay?"

He focused on you, as if he were coming back from some dark place he was visiting in his mind. He nodded and caressed your cheek. You took his hand in yours and joined him on the couch. Stella traipsed down the stairs and sat at your feet. He bent down to pet her and relished in the comfort he had between you both.

The phone rang for a milisecond and Martin picked it up "Hello."

"Martin Alonso?"

"Yes."

"It's been confirmed. It's Maurizio Botticelli."

Martin hung his head as his heart dropped to his stomach.

"You still there?"

"Yes, I'm still here." Martin said with his eyes still shut as if he were silently praying.

"We'll fax the papers and everything over to you. One of our staff is on a plane now for the court case. We're also contacting the family."

"Okay, thank you. I-" he cleared his throat "I may have another location for you to dig. I'm getting a lead now."

The person on the other end sighed "Okay, we'll be here."

Martin hung up. He was unmoving, like some creature frozen in ice. After a moment, he found the words although he'd rather not speak. "It was him, Maurizio."

Agnes solemnly nodded while her boss rubbed at his face.

"Let's give the family some time to process. I can take care of the rest of this, just go home for today."

"But sir--"

Martin waved his hand. His tall frame walked around the desk "Get a good night's rest. Forget about this case for a few hours, if you can."

Agnes stared at him for a moment then decided to follow instruction. She stood by the door "You do the same."

Martin found himself frowning and locked eyes with her. His mouth tried to form a response but he nodded instead.

You jumped up at the sound of the phone ringing yet Nicky beat you to it. Despite how close you were, you couldn't make out the words. It wasn't until you saw the color drain from his face that you knew. It was Maurizio, the teenager. The boy who's peach fuzz had barely grown in before his life was snatched from him.

Your husband's eyes were cast down at your floors. His words were low, a mere whisper "It's him."

Without thinking, your hand found itself rubbing his shoulder. Before you could speak to offer any comfort, he spoke again.

"I should tell Chris and Rocky." He picked up the phone and dialed the number.

"Nicky, do you need a minute--"

"For what?" He glanced back at you while holding the phone to his ear.

You blinked at the obvious answer "To process this."

He only shook his head "There's nothing to process."

The corners of your mouth turned down at how he slightly mocked you, whether he knew it or not. Your hand shrunk back to your side. There was nothing else to talk about. He was already talking to the other person on the line. His voice grew more concerned by the second.

"What do you mean he's not there? Where is he?!"

Your fingers reached for him and he brushed his own hand against them but didn't fully take them in his. He spoke another word then hung up and picked up the phone again to make another call.

You were a shadow standing next to him. The hallway seemed to shrink with each second he spent with his back slightly faced to you. Every now and then he'd turn to his side, allowing you to see his pinched brow and bitten lip.

"Do you need anything?" Your voice was barely audible but he heard you nonetheless.

"No, I just need to make this call."

The half hearted smile he gave you provided little comfort. You returned a sympathetic one then walked off, unsure of what to do while you waited for him.

A few minutes later, he joined you in the living room but he stood nearby rather than sit beside you on the couch. All it took was a glance. The way his hand sat in his pocket, the small twist in his lip, his pinched brow and the far off look in his eye.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'm fine."

Your lips tucked in on themself to prevent you from saying anything else. Those two words made you retreat into the farthest corner of yourself. You, his heart of hearts, could not fix this. You could not do anything and furthermore, he didn't want you to. It felt like you could choke on your heart in that moment but you simply said "Okay."

The silence crept in and made itself at home in your company. Every time you sought to challenge it, it felt.. wrong. You went back and forth in your mind on what to say, how to say it, if you should say it. It wasn't until you felt the heat on your skin, that you realized you'd been turning your wedding ring round and round on your finger. Nicky noticed it, then approached you.

"Don't worry about it," he kissed the top of your head then disappeared into the kitchen.

That small gesture made tears gather in the corners of your eyes.

Nicky busied his hands with whatever he could find in the kitchen. He was cooking. What? He couldn't say since his body was on autopilot. Funnily enough, he remembers when his mom would do the same thing. After her umpteenth spat with his father, she'd often find refuge in the kitchen. Mumbling incoherently to herself in her mother tongue, only to be humming a happy tone moments later.

"Why do you do that?"

"To remember the good times."

He rubbed the seasoning over the meat he'd been working on. Images of Maurizio seeped into his mind. As he continued to work with the meat, he tried not to cringe at the sight of the blood. It was a soft pink like a cherry blossom or a bow on a baby's head. Maurizio's had to be red. An unforgiving crimson splattered across concrete or marble like a nosebleed or busted berry. His hands caressed the meat once last time, unlike Maurizio's mom who didn't get the chance to hold her son one last time. Tears filled Nicky's eyes as he put the meat into the oven.

The doorbell rang and he wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. He heard you shout something but he wasn't entirely sure what it was since he was miles away. "What'd you say?" He shouted back as he walked to the sink to wash his hands. Bits of meat fell off his hands and down the drain. Soft pink, crimson red, death and decay.

His hands were still wet when he shouted "I'll be right there!"

He ran up the stairs to the bathroom where he shut the door behind him and suppressed a silent sob for Maurizio and his own lost youth.

The doorbell rang and you were oddly thankful for the unexpected guests. "I'll get it!"

You were glad that Nicky was busy cooking but also wished he would talk to you. Yet, you knew not to push no matter how loud everything in you was screaming.

A smile spread across your face as you opened the door to see Chris and Rocky. "Hey, you two. Come on in!"

Chris gave you a small smile then tipped his hat before taking it off. Rocky kissed your cheek as he enetered your home. Stella greeted them both and they gave her customary scratches.

"Sorry Stella, I'm afraid I came to see your parents and not you this time." Rocky patted her head.

Chris looked around the house "Where's Nicky?"

"Upstairs, I think." You shut the door behind you and asked the obvious question "So you heard?"

They both nodded solemnly.

"Damn shame," Chris said.

"I was hoping it wasn't true." Rocky added.

"I just hope this gets Floyd for good and we can all rest now."

"Especially his family... poor kid." Rocky shook his head.

The room went silent as you all stood around.

"I'm gonna go look for Nicky. I'll be right back." Chris headed up the stairs leaving you and Rocky.

Rocky noticed the savory aroma filling the air "Oh, what are you cooking?"

You waved your hands "Oh, that's Nicky's doing. Not mine."

Rocky nodded and followed the smell to answer his own question. You trailed behind him.

"Actually, can I talk to you about something?"

"Sure thing." He poked his head in the oven to see what Nicky had been up to.

"Nicky kind of shut down after he got the call, and understandably so, but what do I do? I asked him if I could do anything but he said he was fine. He's clearly not but I don't want to push him."

Rocky closed the oven and looked at you with wise, tired eyes "So don't push him."

"But he's not okay."

"Obviously not but he doesn't want to talk about it." Rocky leaned against the counter "Just give him time. This is heavy stuff, kid and all he wants is to be with you, but it seems like everything in the world is pulling him back."

Your brows pinched as you marinated on his words of wisdom "Thanks. I didn't think of it that way."

"When he's ready, he'll talk to you." He patted your shoulder "Okay?"

You nodded and Rocky looked past you at the two men descending the stairs.

"I'm looking forward to this meal, Nicky. It's hard to find a taste of the motherland in this place."

Nicky gave him a half-hearted smile "I hope it tastes as good as you make it sound."

There was soft talk of this and that while the news of Maurizio's confirmed death hung over everyone's head like a cloud. Every now and then, your eyes darted to your husband and you noticed how his food looked untouched. His glass was half full and the only time he sipped from it was when someone started to talk to him. As if the wine would silence him forever so he wouldn't have to utter a word.

His hazel eyes were currently fixated on the oak table. Chris had just asked him a question.

"No, no new projects now. There's just too much going on."

"I know that. I asked if you had any ideas for an upcoming project."

"Oh," Nicky wiped his brow and smiled softly "no, I'm afraid not."

"I'm sure we'll have plenty of ideas after everything settles down." You chimed in.

Chris nodded his head "Y'know, I wouldn't blame you two if you took a break from the business."

"You deserve it." Rocky added before polishing off his glass.

The corner of your lip turned up in a suppressed smile. A knot had formed in your stomach. It didn't feel right to talk of vacations when you'd found out hours ago a teenager was murdered. "We'll see," is all you said.

The rest of the dinner was quiet which was unusual. Chris and Rocky took their leave but not before giving you and Nicky tight hugs. Then just like that, you were left alone with Nicky who said he was fine but obviously wasn't. Your hands were drying off the plate he'd just passed to you when he said "I'm going to bed early."

Your throat tensed and you tried to say "Okay," like you normally would but it sounded forced. It sounded candied with a sour center. He dried off his hands and kissed your temple then walked upstairs to your shared bedroom. When you were alone, you sighed and studied your reflection in the window.

About ten minutes later, you walked upstairs. When you made it into your bedroom, it looked like Nicky had already fell fast asleep. The room was a dark, icy blue. His mishapen figured was buried under the comforter with Stella at his side. You didn't feel steam from the bathroom nearby so he must've changed straight into his pajamas and climbed into bed.

The knot traveled from your stomach to your throat. It only multiplied with each step forward and it felt like a six ton weight when you sank into bed.

"Nicky, are you sleeping?"

"No."

You turned to face his back and tried to find your words but it didn't matter because he spoke for you.

"I really don't want to do this. Not right now."

You took a deep breath and exhaled softly. You patted the space between you then got up to get ready for bed.

It seemed like you were fighting sleep that night. Meanwhile, that was all Martin could think about. He and Agnes caught a red-eye to New York for several reasons. The first being to speak to the family of the bereaved. Seeing the mother's face twist when she heard the news was something he'd never forget. He remembered the sister being still as stone, a single tear falling from her eye. They interviewed them and thought they wouldn't get much except they were wrong. The sister had a small booklet of notes she gathered on Floyd's crew before he brother's untimely death. It was that small stack of yellowed, tattered pages that got them where they were now, looking into the trunk of Umberto Gavazzi's car. If you tore away the fabric, you saw a stash of keepsakes. The most noticeable being Maurizio's string bracelet which matched his sister's. Martin only saw it moments ago so when he noticed the red string, he felt sick.

"Sir," Agnes tapped Martin's arm.

"What?" He snapped back to the present.

"It's Cliff's baseball card." She pointed to the faded card peeking out behind Maurizio's bracelet among other keepsakes.

Martin and his assistant had made the most of their time in New York by interviewing Cliff Wallace's family as well. His father told a brief anectdote about how his son carried a baseball card with him everywhere. He got it for his eighth birthday and claimed it was good luck.

Martin dropped the fabric so the items were covered again. He approached one of the officers standing nearby. He locked eyes with Umberto himself who only stood a few feet away with an officer watching him like a guard dog.

"This man is under arrest for the murder of two children and God knows who else. Test everything in the trunk and send me the results as soon as you get them."

The officer nodded and looked back at his coworker and simply nodded. The man read Umberto Gavazzi his rights and clasped the metal bracelets around his wrists.

Author's Note: Martin may be my new favorite character. How do we feel about him? Fun fact, 'Death & Decay' was actually a perfume sold at my old job - not my favorite though lol.

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