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bettyshoweduptotheparty · 5 months

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You're Losing Me Analysis

Ok, you got me, enough people messaged me with cute gifs and pretty pleases asking for this analysis to motivate me to finish it. So, here it is, my lyrical analysis of You're Losing Me.

I will stick to my interpretation of this song NOT being about a romantic relationship, the poll I did a while ago showed that most people interpret it to be about a romantic relationship breakdown. I will explain why I don't think that, but if you do, the main lyrical themes will still apply. (Colour coding of main themes at the end)

Before any lyrics, this songs starts with two sounds: A heartbeat and a massive sigh. Like, a really big one, you can even hear the inbreath. Something I've only ever experienced when someone is really, really exhausted and annoyed. I've sometimes made that noise when I'm standing in the pieces of something my children have broken, after I've told them a thousand times not to break it. The non-verbal expression of 'I f*cking told you this would happen'. So, before we even hear any words, I'm able to tell that this is about something that has happened before. We've been round and round this thing a million times. This breakdown has been a long time coming, a death by a thousand cuts if you will ;)

The heartbeat also sets the scene for the main lyrical theme before the first verse starts: A patient in an emergency situation, I envision a hospital room with a heart monitor. Over this heartbeat (and minimal production) we hear Taylor addressing her audience by saying

You say, "I don't understand," and I say, "I know you don't"

The You and the I are having a disagreement, but it's not so much an argument, as a miscommunication. They don't understand what she's saying but Taylor was already expecting that. Immediately, the first line confirms what the sigh was already indicating: This is not a new issue, we've been here many times before so Taylor is well aware that this communication isn't working. Then in the next line

We thought a cure would come through in time, now, I fear it won't

She introduces the medical theme in the lyrics with the word 'cure'. The metaphor is that the relationship that's being described here is the patient that's dying in hospital. This theme is incredibly present throughout the entire song, there is a constant 'brink of death' threat, with mentions of 'gashes', my face was grey' and 'too far gone to bring back to life'. And then, of course, the chorus is the culmination of this with the repetitions of 'Stop, you're losing me' and 'I can't find a pulse, my heart won't start anymore'. This gives me images of an emergency room situation where the patient is flatlining and the doctors are trying to revive them. Or maybe a battlefield, as the last line of the first verse introduces the secondary theme of war or combat with 'You might just have dealt the final blow'. Taylor has of course used the war imagery many times before when talking about conflict, such as in All Too Well ('I'm a soldier who's returning half her weight'), Call it What You Want ('I brought a knife to a gun fight'), The Great War, and the Archer ('I'm ready for combat').

So, despite the initial resignation, Taylor is fighting with the person/people she is addressing here. They are the one that's injuring the patient to the point of near death. And in the chorus she is telling them that, asking them to stop, because the relationship is dying. But we don't yet learn what she is asking them to stop doing. She does, however, show the problem in the relationship when she says:

Remember lookin' at this room, we loved it 'cause of the light Now, I just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time Do I throw out everything we built or keep it?

It's a WE versus I situation: We used to love this room, but now I (and only I) am left sitting alone in the dark. And only I get to make the decision about what to do with all the stuff we built together, because you're not even here to sit in the dark with me. Also, notice the light versus dark comparison. You are only there for the light (easy) parts, and not the dark (hard). In that context, I am inclined to interpret the room in this line as her stages and the light being the spotlight. We loved standing in the light together/You loved seeing me in the light, but now you've left me in the dark. This is why I really think this song is about the relationship with her majority fanbase and not a romantic relationship. Since 1989 she's written about her romantic partner in a way that makes it clear that this person is with her through thick and thin, on reputation we had End Game and New Years Day, the ultimate song about being there after the party when the glitter fades and it's not glamorous anymore, and in CIWYW she literally says her lover's 'starry eyes sparking up my darkest night'. So, I don't think it's her partner who is leaving her in the dark here, it's the fans. And the 'everything we built' is of course the fame/sold out stadiums etc. And that theme continues in the next verse:

Every morning I glared at you with storms in my eyes How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'?I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick My face was gray, but you wouldn't admit that we were sick

Now the picture is becoming clearer as to what the 'you' here is doing that Taylor is asking them to stop, or better what they're NOT doing. She's glaring at them, sending signals and biting her nails, using all forms of non-verbal communication, but they're not being received. Or she's being willfully ignored. The 'I sent you signals' is a screaming parallel to 'I gave so many signs' from Exile and 'sending signals to be double-crossed' from Evermore. And I think in all three cases, it is referring to queer flagging. And just like in High Infidelity (a similar song thematically) she says 'There's many ways that you can kill the one you love/ the slowest way is never loving them enough', here she's saying 'How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'?. Both boils down to the same thing: Your ignorance is killing me and it's a slow and painful death. She ends the verse on the medical theme which has now slightly shifted to Taylor being the dying patient ('My face was grey' - corpse) and the relationship being sick. Over the chorus we still hear the heartbeat though, so she's dying but she's not dead yet.

Let's talk about the bridge. This is juicy, as Taylor's bridges always are, but this one, of course, had the one line that sent all the swifties into an angry rampage against Joe Alwyn. But we'll get to that. The first line is in fact my favourite:

How long could we be a sad song 'Til we were too far gone to bring back to life?

She calls the relationship a 'sad song'. And that's obviously an interesting thing for a songwriter to say, and I've seen many good interpretations of this line, but mine is this: Taylor is the girl who made her name as the young country singer who writes sad breakup songs about her past relationships. And she owned that for a while, until she openly discussed how much it trivialises her writing and that songs are more than just the person she's writing about (not as simple as a paternity test etc.), but have people stopped making her songs about men? When the Joe breakup hit the news, wasn't the first thing the swifties said 'Oh, the next album is going to be soooo sad...."?? So...for some people she still is, and will always be, just the girl who writes about breakups. And she's saying to those people 'how long can this relationship last if that's all you'll ever see me for?' She also, once again uses the medical theme of 'bringing the relationship back to life' when it has in fact died multiple deaths already. But this time it might just be 'too far gone' to be revived.

I gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier Fighting in only your army, frontlines, don't you ignore me I'm the best thing at this party (You're losing me)

She also continues the war/combat theme with being the 'bravest soldier' who is bleeding whilst on the frontline 'fighting in only your army'. This is also important. Taylor is the soldier but she's not fighting for her own cause, she's fighting in the other person's army. She's making herself bleed, for the other person's sake. Much like a closeted gay person pretending to be straight for the mass appeal. It's making me bleed for your benefit, but you don't even notice, DON'T YOU IGNORE ME!! And then we get to the ultimate bait and switch line:

And I wouldn't marry me either A pathological people pleaser Who only wanted you to see her

Where you will all shout at me 'How can it not be about a romantic relationship, it has the line about marrying!!!'. Relax, I think this is intentional. What an easy way to make the whole song sound like it's about a breakup with just one line when the rest of the song suggest something else (to me at least). I don't see this as being about a literal marriage proposal, more like a 'I wouldn't choose me either'. Very much along the lines of Anti Hero, I'm the problem, why would you choose me, but I'd still love it if you did. And she even says in the next part 'I have nothing to believe, unless you're choosing me.'

And I'm fadin', thinkin'

(POV changes, addresses self:) "Do something, babe, say something" (Say something) "Lose something, babe, risk something" (You're losing me) "Choose something, babe, I got nothing" (I got nothing) "To believe, unless you're choosin' me"

So in the imperatives, the direction of address changes and she's now thinking to/addressing herself with these commands: 'DO something, SAY something, LOSE something, CHOOSE something, RISK something.' Almost like she's trying to jumpstart herself into action. This all screams BE BRAVE to me, especially the 'say something' because in the previous verse she was communicating in all these non-verbal ways (glaring, signals, nail biting) and that wasn't working. She's telling herself to be brave and SAY something, make it unmistakably clear, but that may well mean risking something and losing it. Also, choose something babe, you can't play both sides forever. In the last line she then addresses the audience again by saying 'I have nothing to believe unless you're choosing me.' She wants to be chosen by her audience as her authentic self, not as the 'sad song' girl. Once she's said all those hard hitting truths, what follows is a massive pause, a moment of total silence. Like the moment when you've finally said all you wanted to say and now you're waiting for the reaction. And when you almost think the song has ended, we get the heartbeat again and one more chorus.

SILENCE You're losin' me Stop (Stop, stop), you're losin' me Stop (Stop, stop), you're losin' me I can't find a pulse (HEARTBEAT STOPS) My heart won't start anymore

In this last chorus the Stops are now echoed twice to increase the urgency in this plea, it sounds almost like she's saying 'stop, stop stop! It's really about to be over!'. And it is, as the heartbeats stops on the word 'pulse' and the patient has finally died. She concludes on what we have just witnessed 'My heart won't start anymore' but there is no 'for you' this time, because the relationship is dead now. No more coming back this time.

Thematically, to fit into the concept of midnights, this could be a song set in early 2019 when she was planning her coming out, or it could be more recent, as an internal counter piece to Anti Hero. I hope this lived up to what you hoped for, people who asked so nicely :)

blue - medical theme/imagery

orange - direct address to audience

green - war/combat theme

#taylor swift #gaylor #lyric analysis #you're losing me #ts midnights

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 9 months

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Leona, Cater: Rewrite the Stars

I like that Leona’s Groovy is at night; the great kings of the past can watch over him and see how far he’s come ✨The hat shading his eyes in the initial art is also fitting; it really makes his eyes stand out!

Leona voice) Poor me, I need some good rest cuz I’ve been working so diligently as a student and dorm leader 🥺 Lyin’ ass…

P.S. brb gonna grip Cay-kun so hard for saying Leona is “acting like a cool leader” 😊 WDYM CATER??? ??? ??????? ? ?? 😊 YOU 'D BETTRr taKE YhAT BSACk RIgHT NOW MiSTEER 😊 last thing I need right now is a reminder that L*ona’s actually a good mentor OTL

A Boy in Bloom, and his Flowering Future.

“What do you want to do in the coming year?”

"I don't want to repeat a year. That's it."

"Eh." Cater blinked. "You wanna run that one by me again?"

"Clean your ears out and listen carefully next time," the birthday boy retorted. "I'm not going to repeat myself. If you didn't catch it the first time around, then you've only got yourself to blame."

"Nah, I did hear you, but... Well, I guess it's more like a 'Wow, I can't believe this!' moment, y'know?" A faint chuckle emanated from Cater. "After all, you're kiiinda infamous for doing just the opposite! Like, you've already been held back once, and you don't exactly have the best attendance record for lectures."

"An old lion can still learn new tricks," Leona simpered, his mouth twisting into something coy.

"You seem super motivated now, Leona-kun! Did something good happen recently to jump-start this?"

"Good?" A scoff, dryly amused. "That's a stretch. Lotsa stuff happened this year, but I'd hesitate to call any of it 'good'.

"There doesn't have to be some big, fancy world-changing reason for a change of heart. I'm just sick of stewing in the shadows and gazing out to a barren pride land. It's about time for the sun to dawn on a new era—and I plan to be there when that happens."

“Ahahah, well~ Graduating’s the bare minimum for us students. It sounds like you’ve got even bigger goals than that.”

“When you’re as noble of a soul as I am, you’ve naturally got the ambitions to match,” Leona purred sarcastically. His voice was languid, like a cat making lazy strides across the floorboards. “Can’t just be throwin’ in the towel the moment the going gets tough. That goes for Magift and in real life.”

“Hmm? That sounds totes different than the you I remember from the interdorm Magift tournament.” Cater’s mouth pulled into a smarmy grin. “I could’ve sworn you gave up and had a meltdown when your plan was foiled!”

He received a poisonous glare. “You just have to remind me, huh? … You know what? Fine, have your cake and eat it. I’ll own up to it. ‘Sides, it was a long time ago.”

“Right, you’ve had a rebranding and a personality glow-up since. All that’s missing is the formal apology video! It’s a necessity for celebs that get cancelled for their #wicked actions.”

Leona scowled deeply. “Can it, I’m NOT doing that. And who’s a ‘celeb that got cancelled for their #wicked actions’?!”

“Really? Awww, but I bet you’d get mad views on it!”

“Tch, it’s things like this that makes maintaining social grace a real drag,” Leona grumbled under his breath. What I’d give to vanish to a remote resort, far, far away from the idiots I’m surrounded with…

“Anyway, nothing gets done if all you do is whine and then quit. People who don’t try can never achieve anything. They’re already down and out from the get-go.

“Cowards who refuse to look at themselves in the mirror don’t have a place in tomorrow. They’re stuck in the past, clawing for some semblance of hope, however futile. That ain’t me, not ever again.”

“Sounds like you’ve def had this on your mind for a while! You’re acting like such a cool and self-assured leader~”

“Please. This is to be expected of every leader. Even your Red Young Master would know this much.”

Leona leaned his shoulder against the school building. Folding his arms, he lifted his head up. “They’d know it too.”

Cater followed his gaze, meeting a vast expanse of the night. The sky was painted a deep black-violet, speckled in glowing white flecks. Stars—so many of them.

“The great kings of the past,” Leona said, his words tainted with the taste of something bitter. “When we pass on, we become a part of nature: the grass and the dirt that feed the next generation, the stars in the sky that light the way in the dark. The things that keep the world turning.

“In the Circle of Life, we all have our roles to play.” A smirk steadily grew on his face. “I know what mine is, and I intend to act on it. The highest point in the sky may as well be mine.”

His declaration resounded in the silence of the campus. One wish, resolute, uttered only for him and Cater to hear. In the quiet that followed, the green of Leona’s eyes flickered not with vengeful fire, but with a flame more thoughtful and warm and…

… the slightest bit vulnerable. A softness Cater had never witnessed before.

Leona-kun has changed a lot. He’s starting to be a little more honest with himself too. wonder if I could ever meet him on that level.

The thought was quickly shoved away, shelved back in the coldest recesses of his mind before it could properly take hold. The space reserved for the darkest parts of him, where truth soured and masks were neatly displayed.

Familiarity. Safety. Comfort. Perhaps what Leona would have called cowardice.

Cater swallowed.

“… If you ask me, you already shine like the star of a great king,” he said cheerily. “Just check out your birthday get-up! You’ve got the drip and the skills for it!

“I’ve got the skills to be a ball of gas in the sky?” Leona grimaced.

“Hey, hey! Let’s not phrase it like that! It’s so not a nice image to think about. Instead, let’s call it… a ball of stardust!”

“Why stardust?”

“I read in a horoscope once that the reason we can do fortune telling with the constellations is cuz people are made of the same stuff as stars are,” Cater explained with a sure wink. “Stardust! Our essence is the same as the what’s in celestial bodies.

“Don’t you think that sounds so much more poetic? When you wish upon a star, it’s said your name wish will come true—but since people and stars are made of the same stuff… then we should be able to make our wishes come true using our own power ⭐️”

“‘Fraid I fail to see the point of your whole whimsical after-school special. It’s obvious that it’s in our hands to shape the future, balls of gas or stardust or no. The great kings of the past can watch it ‘n weep.”

“That’s the spirit!! You got this~” Cater flashed an enthusiastic thumbs-up. “Go and get’m, Leona-kun!”

“You don’t need to tell me twice.” Leona peeled himself away from the main school building, his broom ready.

The birthday boy plopped down on his magical tool, brazenly using it like a sofa. It floated seemingly on its own accord, effortlessly supporting his full weight. Controlled, obedient—like a waiting pet.

“Oh, wait!” Cater called out, suddenly producing his phone. “Is it okay if I grab some pics of you taking off for Magicam? I’ll just need your handle to send you the…”

Resting an arm on his knee, Leona brought his heel down and grinded it against the handle. A signal, a cue, for the broom to kick into high gear.

WHOOSH!!

A shower of golden sparks exploded from the bouquet, and he smoothly launched into the air, his hair and the brim of his hat flying behind him. The violent kickback slammed into Cater, sending him falling back, his phone clattering to the ground.

(“My phoooone!” he wailed.)

With the shadows out of the way, Leona could see the stars for what they really were. Tens of hundreds of them, sparkling clusters in the inky night.

So many wishes. So many kings. Many, many things. Everything, everywhere, all at once.

A world waiting to be rewritten, to tell of his accomplishments.

“One day… I’ll be among them. They’ll tell stories about me, the greatest ‘king’ of them all.” This truth, Leona spoke to the stars.

The future was littered with prizes, and he was to be the main addressee.

#twst #twisted wonderland #Leona Kingscholar #twisted wonderland imagines #twst imagines #Cater Diamond #twst scenarios #twisted wonderland scenarios #disney twisted wonderland #something no one asked for #Leona birthday takeover #spoilers

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cosmowes · 30 days

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the motivator

if you're having trouble getting motivated these r all tricks i swap between to get to work. no big intro. fatigue has been fatiguing lately, so sorry about the sporadic post schedule- it's hard to keep up with this and school lol, especially seeing as there's only a few weeks to exams

reminder, by the way; there's a difference between "unmotivated" and "tired"!! if your body is telling you "hey lets not" then maybe listen to that <3 i keep learning that the hard way, haha

the action

set a timer for 10-15 minutes; enough time to get started, and tell yourself you'll only work that long. usually by the time the timer goes off i'm already in a flow.

similarly; do the same thing but with a tangible amount of work (eg "5 math problems" "1 paragraph of my essay" "one chapter of my book")

set out a treat for yourself (like a candy you like or something you'd like to do) for after you're done

this is more preemptive but set screentime limits! my password is one i use on literally nothing else and i always forget it, it's a hassle to look for it in my notes so i use my phone less and it makes me do other stuff

or, hide distractors from yourself. you fidget too much? remove that. on your phone? put it in a drawer. out of sight, out of mind

pomodoro timers never worked for me, but i get why they might :)

the words

remember the last time you put off this kind of work and how you felt afterwards. stressed, nervous, unpreprepared...

or, remember how you felt last time you finished a hard assignment. relieved, proud...

even if you mess up now, it's a failsafe. this is practice for the real deal. and if you don't practice now, then you can't get to the actual part.

practice how you play! if you treat school like this, then other things will be harder. self motivation is such a crucial skill.

if you're stressing over it now, why not just get it done with? that way you can stop being so worried about it

whatever you want right now (tiktok, video games, tv shows) will be there in the exact same quantity and value when you're done. but, if you put off work for long enough, the value diminishes- late penalties if it's accepted at all! always pick the urgent.

plus, imagine how nice school will be when you can relax with nothing extra to work on... (honestly? it's kind of boring, i do it)

#study blog #it girl #studyblr #that girl #study motivation #studyspo #wonyoungism #dark academia #academia #chaotic academia

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waterfallofspace · 4 months

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A Word-Filled Update

that no one's asking forrrr~

Sooooo, hiya~ ^^

Realized I kinda dropped out without much word, and wanted to give a lil update to anyone who may care, (and specifically to all the unfilled requests that have been sat in my inbox for months now T~T)

Dropping it under a cut because it gets quite long~ but I'll also TL;DR it with: been a bit burnt out, trying to get back into this, I apologize for all the unanswered asks, and I will be trying to get to the ones I can, but I'll be focusing more on trying to enjoy the process of making content~ Thank you to anyone who's stuck around <3

(Tw for brief mention of mental health/neurodivergencies~ nothing in depth or dark, but just incase anyone wants to avoid that <3)

Nothing serious has been going on, mostly just burn out and a bit of drama in main friend group, combined with free time just being a lot more limited recently~ (not a bad thing, most of it is because I'm getting to talk more with friends I've gotten closer to this past year~)

That said, I've been trying to get back into content, making it, reblogging it, etc, without letting it become all-consuming. I find, with the way my brain works, mostly to do to some wonderful neurodivergent tendencies, I tend to fall heavily into 'all of nothing' mentality.

This shows up in my day to day life, (ie: can't wash the dishes for weeks until I suddenly do them all in one day) and I've definitely noticed it with content creation. Need to write and finish a story in one go, record a wav as fast as possible, always afraid I'll lose that motivation.

But honestly? I love making content on here! And I'm not a huge blog, nor do I care if I am (at least trying not to, if I'm being painfully honest~) but I genuinely love making content. Whether it's just for me, a request that I am hoping one specific person will enjoy, or a story I write with a community in mind, I just love creating~

So, I'm trying to ease my way back into this! Bit by bit, let it be fun, and enjoyable, with less internal pressure to produce as much as I can, as fast as I can, and make it be perfect.

I won't lie and say 'numbers don't matter to me', if I'm honest, they do. But I'm learning more and more how to let it be about the content, and to just enjoy the process~ (and if people like it, that'll be a wonderful bonus!~)

Wooo this is getting so long, I apologize sincerely! Last thing, something I've mentioned a few times previously but never really let myself get into... requests~

I'm so honoured that people care about my content enough to have asked for things, and getting any ask, request, praise, ask lists, heck even just a 'hi!' is honestly the best part of this blog for me!

Buuuut, I definitely worked myself into burn-out before with a "every request needs to be filled and fast" mentality, that led to just... not filling any.

So! I'm going back through my inbox, and deleting some older ones that I don't have a clear vision/motivation for. I apologize to anyone who requested them, though by now it's possible they're long gone~ But I think this will help me not only start enjoying the creation process without feeling so overwhelmed, but also start actually getting more content made~

There are definitely a bunch that I still adore, and am thrilled to get to test out, but if there's one you remember sending, and you really want to see it completed, please feel free to send another ask saying what it is you want done, and I'll see if I can get that going <3

And if you've stuck it out to the end here- uh hi! ^^ I'm sorry this is so long, I'm such a words person, but I appreciate you so much, not just for any support you've offered, but just bothering to read this <3 I genuinely didn't expect most to make it this far, so thank you so deeply <3 and I hope to see you guys around as I start reblogging stuff more!~

#waterfalltalks #waterfallrambles #more like waterfallparagraphs im so sorry hahaha #been thinking about making this for awhile- but always felt so anxious???#idk why specifically... maybe cause i cant be short to save my life #or maybe because it feels like ive left it too long?? been promising so much and never fulfilling #but i am gonna try!! not to fulfill everything but- to start enjoying it again #i worry this comes off like i have an ego... i really dont haha~ i dont expect anyone to really interact with my blog or care #it was always meant to be for ME- and i just hoped to create things ID enjoy and that #if anyone else enjoyed it too that i could start giving back to the community thats given me so much content ive adored #anyways this is a LONNNGGG post and so are these tags hahaha~#using this blog as a journal again i think! but its mine! so okay! im gonna let myself!#gonna add here too that i might be reblogging with shorter tags for a bit- i promise its not cause im not excited!!!#just trying to make it the least overwhelming situation so i can start really getting back into ENJOYING it~#thank you to anyone who read this far and a huge thank you to all my friends from here and anyone who stuck around <3 #i appreciate and love you all so dearly <333 #not snz

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its-coda · 10 months

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I'm really glad to hear you enjoyed Ghost Trick! It's one of my personal favourite games so I'm happy that more people will be able to check it out! But honestly, it is so geniusly written, it's insane.

Like one of my favourite things is there is actually loads of hints towards Sissel's true identity but because they don't dwell on them or they make jokes about them, they just go over your head on your first playthrough. Y'know... Stuff like how he can't read, or how he can see in the dark, or how he torments mice a lot... Stuff like that. It's so clever and I adore it.

Also, because this is one of my favourite twists, what was your reaction to learning Ray's identity?

HUGE GHOST TRICK SPOILERS M’KAY.

Seriously playing this game blind was the best decision i’ve ever made bc i mostly play games AFTER i get spoilers bc i need to know if i would like it, but since literally everyone is THAT tight-lipped about spoilers i figured it would be Good.

Sometime after Yomiel’s introduction, i had a loose theory that he was Ray, but i had serious doubts bc well, it wouldn’t make sense. I do remember Lynne saying Ray had the voice of an old man so for a while i thought he would be a completely new character, but since it was late game, it’d be unlikely. SO YEAH. I COULDN’T HAVE EXPECTED THAT. I also kept wondering how Yomiel was Still Here since we were told ghosts only last for a day. Of course since we were told repeated times that Yomiel was powerful, i thought he was the exception. I think sometime in the final chapter when i started questioning who Ray was, i also started questioning if that part was a lie, because the whole incident is happening Today.

My favorite twist was the Sissel reveal. God that whole chapter was so so good. I’m gonna be honest as i was playing it, the few chapters before the finale was ““disappointing”” for me, for a lack of better word. Like for a while i didn’t like the ‘power from outer space’ thing and i completely didn’t see how they would reach a good conclusion.

BOY WAS I WRONG. The last chapter was a huge Holy Fucking Shit moment for me, and the way they told Yomiel and Sissel’s past was. Aough. EVERYTHING played a part in the whole story and almost every detail is relevant i’m still losing my mind over it.

I also thought for a while like, “revenge? THAT’S his only motive for this?” But then they managed to get his feelings across so well and like, i DO understand?? I fucking love Yomiel.

I’m very much in love with how much foreshadowing they threw in without dwelling on them, but also occasionally mentioned in a way that you just have a feeling that it’s relevant In Some Way.

I fucking love this game. I’m gonna be thinking about this for at least a few more days.

#coda’s rambles #ghost trick #ghost trick spoilers #bro i was YELLING throughout the final chapter #im gonna have to replay that chapter #and ofc the whole game later #also.. when yomiel looks Straight at you when you fuck up. damn #in case you havent noticed my favorite character is yomiel ahdbwhs and sissel obviously #asks

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ducky-died-inside · 2 years

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Hello there, Ducky! I hope you’re doing well. May I suggest Varian with a Gender Neutral s/o who is a pirate? Like idk how to expand ahh like just a funky pirate s/o that sings him sea shanties and brings gifts from far away places? Much obliged, stay safe!! Feel free to delete this req if you’d like

The Wellerman: Varian x GN Pirate Reader

Summary: Headcanons for if you were a pirate and Varian's s/o

Genre: mostly fluff with a bit of angst

Notes: I love sea shanties so yes. Also I'm just doing headcanons for this bc I tried writing a fic but my motivation and inspiration dried up. Reader is 21 and Varian is 20.

Warnings: bit of blood and small stab wound, cursing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He absolutely LOVES your voice, no matter what you think about it

He will beg you to sing any songs you learned from sailing or other pirates

His favorite is the Wellerman (this is my favorite and I'm definitely projecting shhhh)

"Please, Y/N! You like singing it, I like hearing it, it all works out!

"Fine, but this is the last time today."

"Yay!"

There once was a ship that put to sea...

You steal little things that remind you of him while on your travels

It's mostly rare chemicals and shit that he mentions in passing

You remember everything he needs

He never once gives you any lists of stuff, but you come home with a big ass bag full of stuff for him every time

"Y/N, this is too much."

"Nonsense! You said you needed all this shit so I got it for you!"

"...did you pay for any of it?"

"...maybe, maybe not. You can't prove anything!"

"Babes, you know I love it when you get me alchemy stuff, but can you at least try to pay for it?"

"...with money I've stolen or..."

"Oh my god. You're impossible."

"You know you love me!"

The first thing you ever bought with your own money was new alchemy beakers for him

You also find little things for Rapunzel to bribe her into letting you date Varian

Eugene and Lance tell you stories about their thieving days and you take notes on what got them caught

You eventually win Ruddiger and Max over using stolen apples

Varian demands you come back every time you get injured so he can take care of you, and while he wouldn't know if you didn't, it goves you an excuse to come back to visit

"Babes, I get that it's dangerous on the high seas, but how the fuck do you get so injured? It's almost like you do it on purpose..."

"Well, you're not really wrong there..."

"Y/N! THAT'S NOT GOOD!"

"Whaaaaat? It gives me an excuse to come back and see your handsome face."

"And while I love seeing you, there has to be a different way."

"This is nothing. This stab wound is practically nothing compared to what I've had to deal with before. Besides..."

"Let me guess, I should see the other guy? Also, that isn't comforting or surprising in the slightest and I can't decide which is worse."

"Ding ding ding! I'll be fine! 'Tis but a scratch."

"Not just a scratch. Your shirt is covered in dried blood."

"Most of it isn't mine..."

"Y/N!"

Cassandra joined your crew at one point while on her travels

You noticed her name was familiar from Varian's stories about her, but didn't question it

Cassandra's a common enough name, right? She wasn't the same one who kidnapped your partner and almost killed him?

To be fair, you almost had the first time you guys met

He had seen your sword and wanted to get a closer look

He had barely put a finger on it before you had shoved him against the wall and put it against his neck.

He was down bad immediately.

"No one touches my fucking sword except me or the people who get it in the gut. Got it?"

"L-loud and clear."

"Alright. Can I buy you a drink? That got a little out of hand there."

"That would be nice."

She caught you writing a letter to Varian one time and you guys found out how you know about her

"Whoa, what's that?"

"Believe it or not, Cassandra, but it's a letter. For someone really important to me."

"Oh do tell. Who is so special that they've got the mighty Captain Y/N blushing like a small child?"

"First, I'm blushing like a Captain. Second, if you really need to know, his name is Varian."

"Oh my god, wait. Varian?"

"Yeah?"

"Kinda short, black hair with a blue stripe in the bangs, raccoon with him all the time, absolutely loves alchemy?"

"Wait, do you know him?!"

"Know him? I almost killed that little shit!"

"Wait a minute, YOU'RE THAT CASSANDRA?!"

"HE TALKS ABOUT ME?!"

"He said something about a kidnapping some years back. Said you were a great friend until you got corrupted and then un-corrupted."

"Huh. Would've expected a worse report from him."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's all for now! I'll add more if I think of them!

Taglist: @ask-qiqi @kxgaminerin @nocturne-the-raven

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madnessofthespirits · 11 days

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2, 9 and 17 about Diar and Alter for the character ask game 👀👀👀

2. A canon or headcanon hill I will die on

cu alter: ummmm i'd die for anything. for example:

he's not lancer but he is very much cu chulainn

in EPU (and to a certain extent post-EPU too) he's basically just a guy trying to give himself agency in a situation where he's been robbed of his agency. this makes him act really weird

nothing about him has anything to do with warp spasm cu, even on a meta level

he's got that dissociative ptsd

whenever he's kind or caring i find it moving because he's quite literally been altered to suppress those parts of himself, which goes to show that they're actually too strong to be suppressed completely at all, and that he's fighting extra hard to be that way

(i may be interpreting this question as an opportunity to just share random opinions but hopefully that's okay)

diarmuid: the worst things that ever happened to him were ultimately the fault of awful old men with too much power and if fate would actually notice that and try to do something with what that might mean about him i think that would be a much more interesting thing to explore in regard to his character in fgo (or any other post-f/z media he could potentially be in) than well, most of the other things they've done with him post-f/z instead

also *straight guy voice* he's way stronger than either canon or fans usually treat him as being. urobuchi (or someone else on the f/z staff, i forget who) said he might have won the grail war if it weren't for kayneth being a fuckwad. all of the stuff he's done in his legends is at least as impressive as anything cu has ever done.

9. Scene that first made me love (or hate) the character

cu alter: honestly i think it was during the scene where he fights nero and she's trying to understand his motives and nothing he's saying really makes much sense and she points out that he's not even enjoying what he's doing, which he implicitly agrees with, and then tells her that his only goal is to just keep fighting until he's dead. i remember thinking to myself stuff along the lines of "wow bro that sounds Bad what's your problem" and "oh he's like Fucked Up fucked up i can't not care about him" and really it just made me want to understand him so bad

and then there's the finale scene where he finally admits that he's being forced to do what he's doing because medb used the grail to place him under a geis and it's like sad as fuck because he's been forced to sacrifice the parts of himself that feel joy and love just so he can maintain his honor, and therefore it's also heroic at the same time (this is what i'm talking about when i say that though he may not be lancer he is very much cu chulainn). also the part where's he kind to medb while she's dying in spite of having little reason to be and actually holding clear dislike for her is very touching

diarmuid: i definitely liked him from the start - like he so clearly just wants to do the right thing and have fun at the same time in spite of the fact that he has this horrific past and got saddled with this shitty master - like how could i not care about him? but it's definitely the last couple of scenes he appears in that sealed the deal for me. just seeing him walk away from that shitty encounter with kayneth and turn around and decide he's not gonna let that stop him from enjoying an epic fight with his best friend - and then he experiences one of the most awful fictional deaths i can think of and we learn that this whole time while he's been smiling and taking the high road at every turn he's actually been building up this whole volcano of grief and resentment. the whole thing is just as brief as it is powerful. it's a moment of honesty, it's touching, it's relatable, it's the closest thing to justice he's allowed. it contrasts so starkly with the side of him the audience sees up until then that it comes off as genuinely shocking, and it shows that he is just as glaringly human as he is a perfect knight, and therefore what makes him such an interesting and lovable character. can't imagine how hard your heart has to be to see all that and not care for him at least a little

17. Quotes, songs, poems, etc. that I associate with them

cu alter: i think you will either get it or not, but out of all the songs i associate with him, of which there are many, i think of this one as being the most "his" of them all

diarmuid: i know i've already brought this one up before but:

"when i choose to see the good side of things, i'm not being naive. it is strategic and necessary. it's how i've learned to survive through everything." -- waymond wang in everything everywhere all at once (excellent film btw if you haven't seen it)

also:

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lilmissn0nsense · 15 days

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I really do hope none of yall are falling for these 4n4 coaches lol they're just creeps looking for masturbating material😒

They aren't even good at what they advertise too lmfao So don't fall for them!!! they are worthless and nothing but a waste of time.

so here are some tips ive used to help lose and some tricks ive learned along the way, since some of yall need it. ( I've had B3D for the first 14 years of my life, m1a for two years, recovery one year, and now with 4n4. Just sharing my lil history of d1sorder 3ating, to show I'm just a piggy tryna help yall avoid getting taken advantage of, cuz last thing anyone needs is dealing with unnecessary stress from someone who's only taking advantage of ur issues and distress for masturbating material for themselves🤢 Especially the extreme taboo kink predators, they are always on 3d/$h tags, so watch out yall!!!

cw: m3ansp0, tips and tricks♡

rules are great reminders of who u are when ur feeling low. Create a set of ur own that help u keep going!!! Here are my rules, tips and tricks ive learned♡

♥︎ ° ~ ° ♡ ° ~♥︎ ° ~ ° ♡ ° ~ ° ♥︎

#1 rule: if u need someone else to control u to lose w3ight, ur fucking pathetic. U can lose just fine on ur own, quit acting like a fucking worthless piece of shit and do something about it instead of relying on others to make it easy for u😒 U got urself this far, u can get urself to ur fucking goal.

#2: Ur not fucking weak. Don't fucking act like it.

#3: Stop being a lazy bitch and work for it. U can day dream all u want, it'll never be true in this world if ur not getting off ur ass to get what u want.

♥︎ chart everything. Cal logs, w3ight log daily never skip a day, never skip a count. Every cal counts, cuz even if u skip it, ur body won't. It also makes it easier to plan when ur gonna reach a w3ight and it's nice to see it all laid out. Also if ur ashamed to count the cals in something, u prob shouldn't be having it. This is why tracking is amazing, do it daily!!!

♥︎ omad is ur best friend. Treat it nicely. less then 1400cals is still a deficit. U can still lose.

♥︎ Learn about urself!!!! Learn about ur b1nge triggers, what makes u turn to food, learn what food u have no control over + how u can work to control urself around these, what motivates u to keep going with 4n4, etc... Learning more about urself. So then u can counteract those triggers and impulsiveness to eat!!! When u start to get cravings or mental hunger, Work out!!! replace b1ng1ng habits with stuff to actually improve ur body. It take 15+ days for a habit to form. Keep working with it until ur reaction to being hungry, or even thinking of f00d, should be to work out or go on a walk, etc... When u lose motivation, look at the reasons why u started in the first place. Who are u trying prove a point too?

♥︎ do not neglect ur vitamins. And don't be lazy, actually research what u specifically need. One thing will work for one person but won't do the exact same thing for another. So please know urself and get ur levels checked. (im currently being prescribed iron supplements cuz of my fainting issue. So please do ur research.♡)

♥︎ 3L of water a day. Never feel hungry again, always get full off of three bites whenever u do eat♡ also helps with skin, keeps u full and content through ur day. Generally, water is the best♡ If u struggle with getting ur water intake, every time u see ur water bottle/anything mentioning water/randomly remembering water exists. Chug it. U won't remember to drink the amount u should, so chug it.

♥︎ when u do eat, chug lots of water while u eat. Like 1.5L water when u eat. Make sure to chug lots in between bites. This makes the food move through ur system like it's nothing, make sure u have access to a toilet after. It'll be like 5-15mins when it all comes out. U can't control it♡ but hey ur not consuming as many cals as u would've!!! (I love this tip for whenever I b1ng3, makes u full aff and get what u b1nged on out♡)

♥︎ Work out!!! 1 lbs of muscle burns 100cals on top of ur BMR *the cals ur body burns to keep it functioning on a daily basis.* Trade fat for muscle, say goodbye to skinny fat (and if ur fat already ,actually fat not yall twiggys; this will help kinda customize ur body? if that makes sense. Like it's easier to shape fat into what u want ur body to be than it is to build off of a lean/skinny body. so if u wanna be slim thicc, work out!!) Working out should absolutely be part of ur daily life. Working out first thing in the morning and really waking up ur body, letting ur body function!! Work out a little bit through the day, cardio especially!! and then one major workout 3-4h after ur dinner. Wait 3-4h after eating to work out. It helps burn the cals instead of right after eating since u won't burn much. literally work out bruh, it'll help with everything so much. BE EXCITED TO WORK OUT ITS A PRIVILEGE AND U SHOULD BE THANKFUL FOR IT!!!!! the burn in ur lungs, the ache in ur body, is a proud sign. It means ur doing good. Don't wanna ache anymore? work out♡ Working out also acts as appetite repression for some people♡

♥︎ If u smoke weed and can't deal with munchies. Train urself not to be♡ Influence urself while high to crave sk1nn1!!! Train urself to instantly get up and start working out when ur high♡ this is amazing since I'm a stoner and dont like gettinh the munchies, training out my munchies was one of the easiest things to do. It just takes a little bit of time and discipline. But once they're out, they're gone♡ It's been two years since I did that and now I be working out hard-core while stoned lmfaoo It's possible♡ How to train urself, get high and force urself to work out, scroll endlessly through 3d tags and th1nsp0!!! these two really helped me. look at ur own pics and vids. In general just think a lot about ur w3ight. That's what really triggered my cravings and munchies away. (Plus with the anxiety of weed after not smoking, it causes me to not 3at and be hyper. So, cals burning and no appetite♡)

♥︎ If u want to b1nge. B1nge. Hate urself more to really prove to urself how much u deserve to feel this way. Hate urself more now? Good, why not eat one more bag of chips, eat eat eat!!! U wanted this, eat more u fucking pig. Cuz ur gonna b1nge regardless, as if ur gonna learn from the mistakes of the past. U know urself, you will b1nge, so why not get it over with and b1nge as much as u can rn, remind urself of how much u hate f00d, how much u hate urself. Get fatter♡ Keep gaining since this is the only way to motivate u for a couple of days. Just to repeat it all again, in like what? two days? lmfao u can't even make it to four days. So much for "🌟ving" but I get it, pigs gotta eat. go on piglet!! eat!! Sorry let me put it in a way for u to understand. Oink oink♡

♥︎ ACT LIKE UR ALREADY AT UR UWG, 3at like ur at that goal. Would u at ur ugw 3at that? would u at ur ugw be sitting on ur ass rn? What would they be doing? Do it too. Start shrinking ur appetite and portions now, what? u think just cuz ur 🌟ving, ur automatically ur gonna be one of those th1n ppl that barely ever 3at, and when they do 3at its just a bite of something, then they're full. U think that's going to be u? with how much u eat when the fªst ends. Yeah, no. ain't gonna be u, So start working on it now♡

♥︎ Take every opportunity to burn more cals!!! You'd be surprised at many cals u burn by just taking every opportunity to burn. cleaning, even if ur just sitting in ur room. Move ur arms around, do laying down leg workouts, keep moving!!! Ppl have told me I'm more fun to be around when I'm just saying 'yes' to wherever someone wants to go. And everyone knows how much fªsting and restricting turns u into an asshole with no patience. So this works on balancing that attitude.

♥︎ one hour of cardio daily!!! no matter what. In general, getting in ur cardio is amazing, it helps so much with just feeling better. I love the runners high♡ Fall in love with the process, not just the results. Love 4n4 and 4n4 will do everything right for u♡

♥︎ Beauty is pain ♥︎

♥︎ "Fat people are jolly for a reason. You can't be fat and a bitch. You can either be fat and jolly or a skinny bitch. You can't be both." When ur fat u can't be anything but happy and greatful for the bare minimum/barely human treatment. When u have attitude, complain, or do anything but be the laughing stock. Everybody turns on u and immediately starts going for ur weight. Everyone who is ur friend, turns on u.

♡ How many people are using u to make themselves look better? Standing tall next to them while they weigh a quarter of what u weigh, u can clearly see how toned their arms are compared to ur arm fat flapping in the wind next to them. U can see their toned body next to ur fat oozing out of ur clothes. How their clothes barely hold onto their body while ur suffocating in urs, trying to make urself as small as them when only ur an eyesore next their blessing figure.

♡ Ever wonder how many people are only friends with u to get to your beautiful sk1nny friend? How many people only had an interest in u to get on ur friend's good side? if they can see they treat u human, ur friend will love them♡ cuz everyone knows, fat people are only treated like human to impress others. U? nah they don't give a fuck about u, ur just an extra challenge to deal with until they get the prize they really wanted.

♡ "pfft, U can't be talking like that when u look like that lmfaoo" " Look at urself before u speak- oh wait! that double chin is stopping u!" "Thunder thighs!!!" "u make such a good pillow, so fluffy" "how does she eats so much more then u and yet ur fatter? lol" "U do a lot more eating then disordering... I think ur just normal. U don't have an 3ating d1sorder, quit lyinggg lmfaoo"

♥︎ ° ~ ° ♡ ° ~♥︎ ° ~ ° ♡ ° ~ ° ♥︎

any who, I'm sorry for being mean, this post was half for me (as u can tell from the details lmfao) and half for yall, it's just 4n4 brain fog is getting to some of yall. So some reminders; 4n4 coaches aren't ur friend. They're just creeps who want n00ds from mentally ill people, especially from minors.

Tumblr, I've found to be the worsee for ppl preying on mentally ill ppl, minors especially. There are really no real 4n4 coaches unless they have 4n4 themselves. (but as always stay safe, and don't trust any of them. no matter what.) And ik a lot of yall don't listen and only wanna lose, so If ur gonna be stupid and trust 4n4 coaches, here's how; if ur minor never send pics, no matter what (it will count as €P, so just dont.) and if ur adult, do not send pics still. just because ur desperate does not make u easy access, personal p0rn for these creeps.. Never give real info about urself. Make up everything, including ur stats *if u don't already have them on ur acc* (this is to test them- the 'coaches'). If they are instantly asking for pics, BLOCK THEM, if they cant just accept things as they are from the beginning, BLOCK THEM, If they cant just accept ur stat w/o pics, BLOCK THEM. THEY ONLY WANT N00DS. There are many professional personal trainers who never see their clients but yet speak with them all the time. SO PICS ARENT NECESSARY. SRS PICS ARENT NEEDED FOR COACHES. STATS ALONE ARE MORE THAN ENOUGH!!! . If they are focused on anything else but weight, f00d habits/plans, work-outs, and listening to you!! Its extremely helpful to learn from the past. What you've done in the past to lose, but something didn't work or went wrong. If they dont care to listen and only wanna speak like they know everything about u already. BLOCK THEM, or if they start getting side tracked with u, BLOCK THEM. 4N4 COACHES ARENT UR FRIENDSS, They are just supposed to help u get to ur goal. Treat them like a doc check up, they help u form a plan that u both form together, its a plan that is based on u, not on them, based on ur activities and eating habits, etc.. this plan is for u, built off of u. Once the plan is good enough, where u feel confident about actually going to go through with it, do it for a week, and then check in at the end of the week. there shouldn't be daily talking or talking about anything other than how the plan is working, what u can work on for the next week, what ur goal for the end of the week is. If the plan needs to tweeked, if something is not working, how u feel!!! Never neglect how u feel cuz w3ight loss does affect ur emotions (and neglecting ur feelings will only cause u to turn to f00d, b1ng1ng) etc.. it should always be about how ur feeling with everything and what u feel like should be done next. Do not get attached to the coach OMFGG. Do not, Ur setting urself up for failure. And if ur not seeing anything different with urself but ur just getting asked to be showing off ur bones (especially ur hips, ribs, chest!!! and private areas. These places are easiest to be like "show more" or they start throwing m3ansp0 at u to get u to send n00ds.) or progressively getting asked about sending naked b0dy ch3cks. BLOCK THEMM. DO NOT WASTE UR TIME AND ENERGY ON SOMEONE WHEN U COULD BE LOSING INSTEAD!!!! No one is worth possibly gaining or b1ng1ng for.

You can lose just fine on ur own, the only person who's stopping u, is u. You can find ways to sneak past the guards of people. manipulation and lying is second nature for rexies♡ You got this!!!

HIGH RECOMMEND JOINING 4n4 SERVERS!!! The servers are usually pretty good cuz you're surrounded by people who all have a common goal, tips and tricks, people who u can talk with about this stuff, people who can help keep u accountable, etc.., creeps are usually picked out instantly. Plus, it's good to have people around u who understand this side of u. Who u can ask if someone is overstepping, get their opinions if ur unsure.

General question from me, cuz i dont understand: Why owe ur w3ight loss to someone else, when u can proudly say u did it by urself? Nothing feels better than when ur 40lbs lighter and everyone is asking how u did it. being able to proudly say "I did it all by myself." It took ur dedication, ur time, ur effort, ur patience, it took strength to do by urself. But u did it. Soo Why owe ur greatest success to someone else? Why let someone else take credit for ur work? "OH i let someone control my eating and my entire being for get me to this w3ight!! :)" Sorry, but that's just sad...honeyy that devastatingly sad omgg please never allow that. I feel like I'm looking at drowned malnourished kittens omgg pleasee never say that sentence or anything similar. Don't even think that. Just do it urself, it's much more fulfilling!!!

that's all I can think of rn, whatever else comes to my mind I'll add to the comments!!

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sadiewayne · 8 months

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my somewhat hot take on ric grayson

firstly, spoilers for the whole ric grayson arc. if you haven't read it and have somehow avoided learning about it through tumblr, here is your warning

also a disclaimer, i am only just getting into comics by reading nightwing. i have read nightwing (2011) aka new 52, grayson, and all the rebirth (2016) stuff. i am yet to read infinite frontier (it's on its way) so i can't talk about any of that

spoilers and shit opinions ahead

so, i read all of ric grayson aka nightwing (2016) #50-73/77 depending on how you want to fully define his arc and the supporting issues of batman #54-55, and the joker war where he gets his memories back

and tbh, it wasn't as bad as i thought it was going to be

don't get me wrong, its an awful nightwing story. i did hate a lot of it. it was only when jurgens took over and actually made the plot a plot did it get better, but i was expecting it to be the worst thing in the world and i actually found myself enjoying it in the same way i enjoy watching twilight, which is to say its cringy but there's just something that keeps me hooked.

so lets look at the positives and negatives

positives:

bea: i actually really like bea. i think she was actually a decent match for dick as she did good in her own, non-vigilante way, and was reliable. she wasn't trying to backstab him or trying to mind control him, and she actively fought for him to get his memories back in the end and was willing to get to know dick even thought she fell in love with ric. she also wasn't annoyed that he was/is a vigilante and didn't tell him to stop for her sake. i'm not mad dick broke up with her bc i expected as much, but she was one of the better partners.

parts of ric: under it all, ric was still dick. i was expecting an absolute piece of shit but ric was actually a good guy after jurgens took over. maybe it was the expectations i had from what others have said but fully, i think he isn't given enough credit. he wanted to leave the life he didn't remember behind but ended up going back to it and being one of the 'nightwings'. he didn't do it for an anterior motive, he didn't do it because he owed someone, he did it because it felt right. especially after the way he reacted in nightwing annual #2 when bruce old him he was nightwing, it was nice to see him going out there.

the court of owls: i loved the court of owls tie in. its a great plot that has been central to dicks new 52 story, and one that carried all the way through to the end. especially with it being cobb in the end, the way it started, it felt nice and cyclical. the history of the court of owls in terms of its creation for new 52 is interesting and the way dick was tied up in it all is one of the things that i have really enjoyed throughout the 3 titles. seeing it through 2011, grayson, and then multiple times in 2016 makes me little nerd heart sing. again, it may just be my bias to the court as a villain, but seeing dick as a talon, even for a short period of time, was pretty cool.

joker war: obviously this whole storyline could work independently with dick or ric but i do like how it was tied into his story so well. the magic crystal thing is weird but, given dick's history with the joker as robin and as jason's brother, i loved that it was the joker that brought his memories back in the end i know it was the court and the bea that did most of the work but still i also loved seeing the aftermath, seeing him struggle to go back to nightwing despite him being dick again, the fact that he was happy as ric and had to leave that behind. dick had another hero moment and i do like that

ok, with that all done, here are the negatives:

the arc length: i know this is very common but the arc went on for way too long. i know it was because the original 8 issue plan was thrown out, and jurgens then had to do damage control, but it was still too long. im lucky that could read it all start to finish in one sitting, but this was an arc that lasted 2 years! like WHAT! this really should have been 1 arc, i get it being 2 after the whole mess with who wrote it but still, cut out like most of the middle stuff, have the first arc and the final court arc and then boom, it would be so much better.

the other parts of ric: ok, so i don't like most of his character. mainly him not accepting help from his family. again i know this is a common complain, most of the negatives are, but he had so many people around him that wanted to help and he dismissed them all. they all tried to help him have a life afterwards and he basically told them to fuck off. even after he started going and vigilante-ing again, he never reached out to talk to them. i do sort of get it when he first left the hospital to go to the manor and bruce had the stupid idea to show him his death, but i still think it was a major flaw.

dan didio, scott lobdell, and eric esquivel: if you don't know these names, count yourself lucky. i did my research and found a great reddit post all about the logistical history of ric grayson that is worth reading if you're interested but the crux of these three is a whole list of verbal abuse, toxic workplace practices, and sexual harassment/assault. didio is co-publisher and has a reputation of hating nightwing, like he tried to have him killed off during infinite crisis all the way back in 2005. lobdell is the person who ached for the amnesia arc to be extended despite him only writing 8 issues in the end. esquivel was only brought on for co-writer for one issue but that issue was released only a few days after sexual abuse allegations about him came out. a lot of these men being in charge of nightwing and not being fired until 2020 comes down to their standings in DC and the connections they had at the top. all disgusting, but it meant that the first chunk of ric graysons run is marred with their names and actions. i wouldn't;t include this as a factor except it is a factor. ric grayson may have been 'created' by benjamin percy but he only wrote the first issue, the next 8 were lobdell, before jurgens wrote the rest. and if the big men upstairs wanted ric grayson, they would get ric grayson.

honestly, when i got to #49, i was tempted to not read any further. I would just skip straight to infinite frontier and pretend that ric didn't exist. but i wanted to do my due diligence to the character, so i powered through and found that there was some light in the dark. there is a lot wrong with the arc, and even with the positives i would still say i didn't like the arc, but i can see some of the positives.

also again, this reddit post is super interesting for anyone who doesn't know the history behind ric as how he was received at the time. im glad i read it but i won't be revisiting it

#dc comics #ric grayson #dick grayson #nightwing #batman #bruce wayne #red hood #jason todd #red robin #tim drake #robin #damian wayne #batgirl #oracle #barabra gordon #comic history #sadies dick grayson

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grandlovescheme · 6 months

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20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @luthien-under-bough, thank you! I love talking about fics and the process of how I write them, so this was fun to put together :)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

459,900

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Now exclusively House of the Dragon, specifically Daemyra

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

High Hopes

Let's Ignite Under the Ember Skies

You're Ripped at Every Edge (But You're a Masterpiece)

If I Could, I'd Get You the Moon

The Dominoes Cascaded in a Line

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, I try to always respond, even if the comment is to an older fic. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed or don't even know what to say when someone's being way too kind to me lol, but I always want to let people know I see them and appreciate them so much.

The only time I don't... is when I see someone's binging my whole fic, so then I only respond to the last comment, once they're all caught up.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This is easy, as I only have one fic without a happy ending - All and Then Most of You, Some and Now None of You. I love daemyra too much to not give them HEA as much as possible

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This is hard to pick... Because all of my fics, apart from that one, end teeth rootingly sweet 😂 Perhaps Dominoes. Or perhaps fighter!au, which you guys haven't read yet but it's very fucking happy!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Sometimes. Though it is much much better now that I disabled anon asks.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! What kind I write... Hmm, tbf I think I write pretty vanilla stuff, even if I do try to explore some kinks here and there when it fits the story and the characters. I guess my kind is focusing on the feelings most of the time, and the emotional connection.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don't, or at least I haven't yet. We'll see if muse ever strikes this way!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, so hopefully not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

A few times in a different fandom

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, not yet, but I'm definitely open to the idea. I definitely wrote a bunch of stuff based on my fandom friends' crazy ideas and prompts with their help, so that's halfway there, I guess

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

No couple had ever taken over my life and thoughts the way Daemyra did, so, the answer is clear!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Soulmates AU? I was once so excited for it, wrote a bunch of notes and even the first two chapters, but now I'm kinda... not feeling it :(

16. What are your writing strengths?

I spent the longest on this question. I think it's the emotions I try to convey in my fics, good or bad.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Now this is much easier. Plot! Intrigue! If you guys haven't noticed yet lol, I write fics heavily focused on romance only, and the development of Daemyra's relationship, because I just can't pull off anything more than that.

I'll probably never write a fic where people will wonder what'll happen next, what that and this means, what this person's motivations are... Because I'm unfortunately not wired that way. But I learned to accept that, and I have fun writing my silly romances with no real plot <3

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've done it myself a few times and I like to see it in other fics, too. Especially in HV it's delicious to see in the canon-verse. Though I always struggle with how to write the translation - right next to it, in cursive, in brackets, in the final notes?? That's always a head scratcher

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Eh, probably Twilight? I don't remember writing anything before that, so must be it

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Probably still High Hopes, even after all this time 🤍

This was fun! I'm tagging some of my writer friends if they wanna join and haven't yet, @ar-feyniel, @eschercaine, @calenlily, @fiora-miriel and anyone else who wants to! :)

#my fic stuff #question game #my writing i guess

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jazzpostsstuff · 8 months

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Chapter: AXL Development Documents, Initial Story Concept PART 3

If you happen to wonder why this project has some psychological or just some heavy themes that haven't been explored by the series prior, it's because the creation of this fanfiction happened to coincide with some bad and traumatic stuff I've experienced a mere month after I decided to make Chapter: AXL into a real thing. Usually when you feel like something is getting really good, there would be a moment you will just spiral down to the depths. Both your existence and mental state fall so deep you would look back at who you were before and not recognise that person anymore.

Going through a sudden loss of a loved one while you're still a child (or rather a teenager in my case but I can say I had a mind of a child at that time) is always devastating, and going through that together with your family can be even more soul-crushing because you see their pain and suffer even more from inability to influence your other family members, feeling weak and even going insane from that sometimes. Knowing that the last time I was optimistic was when I wasn't accepting the death of a family member and was trying everything to make them open their eyes and speak again has been making myself sad everytime I looked back at who I was just one and a half years ago. I am even tearing up while writing this right now, so I am clearly not helping myself here.

You can never truly recover from something like this. You can only overcome, let go and enter a new chapter fo your life as a new person. You would look back at the past, at the good moments you had so long ago, maybe you'll smile, maybe you'll get sad again, but just try looking at the bright side. Those happy memories were something that happened to you. The people you see in them might be gone, but it would've made them sad if you just gave up after the loss. You was strong enough to get back up and learn how to live again, despite everything you went through. And if you're still there, at the bottom, it can motivate you to get better for them and maybe regain the optimism or happiness that was lost.

If you fear death after an experience like this... I know how hard it isfor some because I've been there, but just try to accept your mortality. Knowing that you can't stay alive for all eternity would make you cherish the time you have on this Earth more and live a life to the fullest (within reason). Eternal life would just make you less human eventually (which was also something that happened to X prior to Zero series as well so here's an example of how living forever can suck).

"Why is it in a Megaman fanfic?". Well, I always related to Axl and I managed to bond even more with him after what I went through (the loss of a family member at a relatively young age, to be exact). Besides, Axl's story was supposed to be grimmer and deeper according to one of the producers of X7. I felt like taking a psychological approach to the story of Chapter: AXL and exploring the trauma that you get after experiencing horrific events only made sense. However, I am still not going into that topic too deep because I am still writing a Megaman story, but maybe you can argue that I still can do that because it's based off MMZ, but we have to remember that it's a story about war and hope - a hope for a better peaceful future that comes after the worst, like the light in the darkest depths you could've fell into.

You have to retain this hopefulness, give a breathing room after a disaster and not bombard the player reader with depression all the way through.

#fanproject #megamanzero #mmz #megaman #megamanfanproject #rockman #rockmanzero #ChAZ #Chapter: AXL #feelings #deep thoughts #hopefulness #dealing with loss #dealing with grief #overcoming

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ley-med · 10 months

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Hi!!! I need some advice from you or other doctors/med students. I just have a few exams left till the end of med school but I just. Can’t. Study. Anymore. It’s making me want to throw up. I hate it so much. I open the book and I’m just like 😭😭😭. And the worst thing is that after I’m done with med school I will STILL have to study. Till I die. And I currently just don’t want to study ever again. I feel like it’s sucking all the life out of me. So if someone here ever felt like that, I would greatly appreciate some words of wisdom haha

Oh sweetheart, I feel you! And I assure you, most of us had been here, and still succeeded against all odds. I'm sure others will have some advice too :)

To be honest, I'm not entirely sure how I passed my last exams, I was also suffering from a very heavy case of "I can't study"-ness (and apparently also undiagnosed ADHD, not helping my case). What worked for me (kinda), I took breaks pretty often. Might seem counterproductive, but it's better if you do something fun/relaxing/anything else for an hour and then study effectively for half an hour, than suffering through that one and a half hour without getting any studying done... Eat well, do sports, and sleep enough! And then, just take a deep breath, and suck it up, force yourself trough the material. Pure force of will. And my favourite motivational pinterest quote: "the quickest way out is trough". (You can't imagine how many times I repeated this sentence like a mantra in my head, instead of actually studying, naturally)

And it's important to remember, you are at the end of med school. You know way more than you believe. If your school is anything like mine, most of these exams will test you on stuff you've already learned once (or twice or thrice etc). You need to freshen it up, definitely, but you already have most of the knowledge you need to pass.

Believe me, I know the feeling that you think about the future and you want to throw up because of all the studying you will have to do after med school. Hell, I'm still in my "school? never again" phase. (I might have slight PTSD from med school... But yeah, we are talking about you and not me here. Anyway.) First off, you will most probably have some time off after finishing med school and before starting your first doctor job. Hide all the medical books from view! If you have a few months, by the end of it you might even be able to read more than a page of a non-science-related book you actually enjoy! But joking aside, time off after med school really works wonders. It's absolutely necessary for your sanity and survival, and it will help regain some of your motivation.

Second off, studying after med school is much more fun! If anyone told me this, I definitely wouldn't have believed them, but it's true. Now I have to study things I'm interested in, things I care about. I see it put to work in day to day life, hell, I use it in day to day life. Never thought I would say this, but studying now is (mostly) fun. I'm starting to remember that I used to like studying, that I'm curious about the world around me... So to summarize, it gets better. It's still studying, sometimes it's still an "I don't wanna" chore, but when the difference between studying or not can literally and actually make the difference between a patient's life or death, that terror makes for a pretty fucking great motivation. And when you studied something and then use it in your work the next week? Amazing feeling.

So hang in there. You got this far already, you can do this! It's going to hurt all the way, but you are going to be standing there on the other side victorious, so just puff out you chest and keep going until you get there.

Best of luck with your exams!

#medblr #med school #studying #studyblr #advice #hope the others will chime in too #and as always #thanks for reading my ramblings #i wish you all the best anon!#please let me know how it goes

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justporo · 7 months

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From your fanfic Q&A prompt! 13, 14, 15 and 18! <3 :D

Thanks for asking, Anon! From this Q&A thing.

13. What are some must-read fanfics in your fandom? Why do you admire these, and how have they impacted your works?

I'm not nearly reading enough fanfics about Astarion - which is solely because I have too much shit to do... So it's mostly one-shots I come across.

I guess, for one, you absolutely HAVE to read @tripleyeeets A Lover's Folly because wow (and also there's another story developing)... Their writing is amazing, the way the characters are written... also their writing deeply motivates me to get better because I feel like I have much to learn in terms of articulation and just in a technical sense.

@sweatandwoe has written some amazing one-shots for requests and wrote this one here which desperately made me want to write a story with ascended Astarion and all the angst and slow-burn in the world.

@lokasxnna has written this wonderful piece about Astarion and his pointy ears (and the title is so amazing): To Hold Me Like Water And I just love the idea and the way a soft, intimate moment is shared.

@thatfreshi writes very emotional one-shots that explore vulnerable moments, that sometimes go as far as making my chest hurt: Not if You Collect Them Like Ex-Lovers (Enjoy the damn pain, y'all!) And that really made me want to include more moments in my stories where Astarion and Tav deeply connect on an emotional level

Alright, some more questions, this will be long, so rest goes under the cut:

14. What aspects of your creative process do you enjoy the most? Which are most challenging?

Most? Thinking about it, immersing myself in the world and the characters, down to the last little details. Coming up with stupid or very emotional stuff and funny (at least to me) dialogue. Most challenging is definitely finding the time to work on stuff - atm I could really just keep writing all day. Also... the English words won't English sometimes although it's gotten better already (I think??). But yeah, cliché, I know, but: English isn't my first language - so... I'm sorry.

15. What programs/tools do you use while writing?

I write in Word and use OneDrive so I can work on different devices (might move over to GoogleDocs soon to make that easier). Dict.cc is my best friend in terms of vocabulary, when I don't remember exactly if I've chosen the right word or just can't English for a hot moment... Also Spotify stays ON while writing. That's it I guess.

18. Are there any themes or tropes that you enjoy writing? Any themes or tropes you hate writing?

I can't say that I've written awfully much yet, so let's go with what I think I'd like or hate. I definitely like enemies-to-lovers and slowburn, a good grumpy meets sunshine trope, grumpy characters, sassy characters, gothic themes and environments, the gentleman villain trope... List could go on I think. Things I really don't enjoy is like major miscommunication and when characters just won'T FUCKING TALK ABOUT WTF IT IS THAT BOTHERS THEM, UUUGH (this is the worst really and makes a lot for lazy writing when trying to create drama, imho) But I can't really think of something else that I'd really hate (other than stuff that's ofc not legal or shit like that).

#poro answers

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softsky-daily · 4 months

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12/19/2023

I don't actually remember taking this picture but here it is.

Positive thing: I finally had my last day of work and I got to leave early.

I was very restless all today. Like just constantly switching whatever I was doing. It's not the first time I've felt like this but I can't really tell why it's happening now. Oh well, that's what therapy is for.

I did end up doing a bunch of Japanese study related stuff today since I was switching activities so much. For my next books I'm reading アドラー流子育て (Adlerian Child Raising) and also volume 2 of ヨコハマ買い出し紀行 (Yokohama Shopping Log). I figure since one is a manga I can switch back and forth easily enough. I also got really caught up in looking for study resources but the thing is that I'm at a level where unless I'm looking for a specific subject (like pronunciation or something) there aren't really any resources for me. The best course of action is just to do what I was already doing and keep consuming native Japanese material and doing Anki.

Learning Japanese feels like such an undertaking. Not just because it's literally one of the hardest languages to learn but also the whole Japanese-learning-sphere is inundated with resources that are super overwhelming to try and sift through to see if they're actually any good or not. In the end it comes down to asking around and figuring out what works best for you. But for me that took years and years and most of it was structured (i.e. classes) so I wonder how everyone else figures it out.

Honestly it probably really just comes down to attitude and motivation. Someone with the right amount of both can get through the hurdles of figuring out what resources to use. Everyone else just gets discouraged and drops.

I was definitely one of those people who dropped. I have a lot of insecurities when it comes to Japanese, mostly due to the circumstances surrounding when I was at the peak of my learning. But I was thinking more about it today and having gone through all that is probably how I can get over new hurdles a little easier. Now that I've found the motivation, I'm kinda just like "well at least it can never be as bad as it was back then" so smaller setbacks hurt less nowadays.

Man. Study abroad was a time. I'm glad I never have to repeat that nightmare. Even terrible program management aside, those were easily the most grueling classes I ever had to take. Thinking about it, the people whose Japanese-learning opinions I value most went through their own harrowing experiences trying to learn it in some way. Maybe it's a rite of passage of some kind. (I don't actually believe that.)

#skyposting #thoughtposting

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sol-draws-sometimes · 4 months

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Disc World Book Club Thoughts- Monstrous Regiment

Pages 33-62

Hey @anna-neko, and uh anyone who's still following this... haaaa remember this....

Anyways, ha! Me when I lie!!!! Look, the end of the semester started kicking full gear and then holidays but I'M BACK(what I always say, but I swear I mean it this time!) Ugh, as I keep reiterating in this series, reading hard for me, not because of the act of reading in itself, but the motivation it requires for me to stay focused long enough on a book to actually finish it. In the past I was using the the audio book for quick 5-20 minutes stints, but I was mostly doing the combo of audio+book because I want to process everything. Anyway, I made the executive decision to treat this book like a podcast which means I am missing more little details BUT it has made getting through the book easier. That sounds like the book is a slug to get through, and that's not true, I'm really enjoying this book. It's just, getting my brain to actually start reading is a hassle and a half. I've gotten through an hour of book in a week though, so that's pretty exciting!

Anyway, onto scatter book thoughts as I was having them!

YOOOOO SOMEONE'S PREGOOO

Yah you spoiled that to but I finally got that point! Also, I forgotten WHO it was but was SHUFTI

Actually we have a small problem where I just can't remember half of the casts names so ESPECIALLY their last names, but me as of 1/8/2024 has written their full names down so hopefull I'll remember now. Also I read Blouse's fanwiki cause I forgot who he was and spoiled myself a little but nothing too serious I don't think. Oopsies! Anyways, I have their names written down so no more confusion!

EYOOO STRAPPI'S A COWARD AND THEY'RE GONNA FIGHT IN THE FRONT LINES

The way I was thinking "Polly's crossdressing!" like no, she's literally just being her normal gender!!!!! We love a girl crossdressing as a guy crossdressing as a girl.

In all seriousness, I really enjoyed that whole sequnce of her beating up guys crossdressing as a girl, and the Maldict joining her and the whole Jackrum taking the as prisoners and talking to them. Just a fun section of the book I really enjoyed. I love Polly and Maladict's friendship! It's so fun, and they got great chemistry

Also, interesting how the whole thing is that men go to war cause they're strong and stuff, but the first enemies Polly fights, she does as a girl. Idk just neat!

Also I've already mentioned this, but I'm obbssed with Polly as a character, she's so interesting because she's so judgy of the others. And she's the epitome of the "I can tell crowd."(looks at her being surprised that Tonker's a girl) Obviously, she's not doing it for transphobia reasons, but it's facinating to me how her stress of getting caught and stuff leads to her being overly critical of how the other girls are trying to pass. Like, Lofti got caught for saying "sugar" but Polly caught herself not cursing either, also I think she starts making the active effort to curse more after that. Just interesting how she adds on her act of being a guy with everyone else's mistakes.

American moment: Me learning bugger is vulgar?????

YOO THEY'RE REVALING THEMSELVES!!! I thought Maladict was included in that, but I guess not cause she was interrupted.

Also I think???? Jackrum is openinly showing he knows???(lets be real he knows they're girls). He refered to them as ladies but then used he/him for Polly, so I'm kinda confused on that front, but I'll just wait for a scene will clarify that for me

Also learning they’re reasons for joing are all pretty interesting!

Anyways this quote was cool (quote bellow)

It was for the other one, the little lesson that life sometimes rams home with a stick: you are not the only one watching the world, other people are also people, while you watch them they watch you, and they think about you while you think about them. The world isn't just about you.

OH DEATH MENTION!!!! This is a war book so he'll probably appear in this book. Obviously I don't want any of the characters to die, but I've heard GREAT things about Death, so I'm excited to meet him!(hopefully is a near-death moment and not a real death moment, but lets face it, someone's gonna have to die)

They're cutting to Vimes and stuff, and they're defineitly some "wink wink" "nudge nudge" moements that I'm missing, not to say that I'm not understanding anything, but I can just tell I'm in the know, you know. That being said, the sections with Vimes are pretty intresting and Angua seems pretty cool.

Also idk why but "bitch" caught me off gaurd??? Apparently they've been cursing and shit thorughout the book but bitch is the first curse word that actually means something to me. I'm sure they've said some other curse words that I recognize but I stopped reading the books for a couple a months. Also I have the mouth of a sailor, so it's not like a care, I guess I'm just confused that it surprised me. Also, Polly herself said she doesn't curse much so that probably means that the curse was light in the book since it's in her POV(also, curse words like "damn, bastard, etc. mean nothing to me")

Also I don't know how elaborate on this besides, "Wow, this is totally not a commentary on how British people view Christianity and the royal family!"

[insert pic]

Yah yah, jokes aside, I grew up agnostic and in the US, so not much to say beside monarchy bad(hot take am I right) Tho, tbh even the obvious connection is the royal family, man sometimes to does seems like certain groups worship politicians on a religious level. Also, there is smoothing to be said about a lot of manipulation tactics of authoritarian governments is the whole 'make them have problems' and then say, "I am the solutions to all your problems." And so with all the abominations being things that are so bad that it leads to the citizens not being able to eat well, it makes it easier to get the population to manipulate say that "X" is the bad guy.

Interesting seeing Polly have disphoria. I don't know if that's the terminology they would've used when the book came out, but Polly being like "damn, do I really that convincing as a boy" and feeling akward that everyone was 100% sure she was a guy. Like that is the goal, cause she's trying to be undercover, but also it's weird knowing people percive you the wrong gender, you know.

Also side note but I recently watched Blue Eyed Samurai, so spoilers for the first ep, but Mizu is also an undercover girl, and it's like damn, it like, in alot of these stories, these women are able to pass as guys cause they're natrual frame helps them alot in that regard. Like I have pretty boxy frame, so maybe when I was younger I could've passed as a guy if I tried, but me now, that would be way harder cause of my chest. And idk like, man it'd be cool if I could try to pass as another gender pretty easily you know?? I'd just have to work on my voice cause it's super high. Tho, I have been gendered as a guy cause of my hair + buttondown combo, so who knows, maybe I could. Anyway, back to the story

Not me reading a really dark scene of Polly and Maladict finding bruttally murdered bodies and laughing at the, "they would not grow older" line. SOLL GET IT TOGETHER!!! Anyway, despite what that sentence may imply, that whole scene was like, wow that's dark. Like the scene in Mulan right after girl worth fighting for.

Watching Polly gasp for air was like AAAAAAAH

Also Maladict having to contain herself cause of the blood, just an intresting scene!

I'm surprised Polly was saying " I thought we were the good guys" cause she seemed to have pretty good media literacy(for being a Boragravian) like, she was mention how the newspapers would proabbly not be trustworthy(cause she only knows her current governement), and she knew that the whole "Boragravia is winning" stance that everyone was saying is wrong. Also way back earlier in the book she talks about there always being a war, but I guess she wasn't being satrical??? (here's the quote)

There was always a war. Usually they were border disputes, the national equivalent of complaining that the neighbor was letting their hedge grow too long. Sometimes they were bigger. Borogravia was a peace-loving country in the midst of treacherous, devious, warlike enemies. They had to be treacherous, devious, and warlike, otherwise we wouldn't be fighting them, eh? There was always a war.

Guess Polly wasn't immune to propaganda (insert Garfield pic). I guess it makes sense tho, cause it's hard to process that your homecountry does horrible shit.

Also intresting how Jackrum dismissed it, like, I guess I thought he'd be more in the know that the government aint the best. Idk, he's pretty intresting, cause Idk his full stance on things. He telling Blouse that the news is coming from the enemy, but like, it's hard to deny that Boragravia's doing well. Guess that now that he's fully encharge we get to see him more than him just him being a nice relif from Strappi. Anyway, WOW Jackrum is a nuanced charcter???!!! Sarcasm aside, I think I need to read a bit more get my full thoughts on him.

Also something something, they're getting deprogrammed(for example, shufti and wazzer realizing they're losing) through experiencing war.

Anyway TONESHIFT Polly trying not to kill Blouse while shaving him is hilarious

K where I left off!!! Strappi(or so Polly thinks, and I'm inclined to believe her) has stolen a bunch of shit from the girls, so shit's about to go down. Poor Maladict doesn't have her cofee, and POLLY'S HAIR IS MISSING.AAAAAAH! Tbh, I thought her letter from Paul would be missing, so at least she still has that.

It's like 2:00 rn, so I'm pretty tired but I'm pretty hooked on the book rn, and maybe this semester I'll read more! Well, Feburary's gonna be busy cause I'll be auditioning to schools, but I'll try to make space to read. Also apperantly the hoopla has sections they've marked as chapters???? Tbh, it's proably whenever the audiobook plays the little military music. Anyways, I think another issue with the discworld books is that Terry Prachett doesn't do chapters, so I don't have that dopamine hit of "chapter completed!" But yah, maybe I'll try to keep track of the "chapters," to see if that motivates me more. Anyway, uh, I'll proabbly quee this for like 3:00 cause it's 8:00 in England and the book series is more popular over there. Okay, think that's it I'll talk next week.

Ps: idk how I indedent in the bullets, did it by accident on laptop and then copypasted it, I don’t know how I did that

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#sol talks #my post #book club #disc world #monstrous regiment #city watch #polly perks

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