#i dont want to relapse

[i-deserve-to-bite]

oh oh no and Here's The Crash things are Wonderful and Perfect and Loving and I am simply Augh and think Bad

#maybe i should go to bed early #i dont want to relapse #and maybe i could wake up early and work on the animation #i dont understand why i get like this #everything is good why am i miserable all of a sudden? #i wwish i could be held #i dont understand anything right now and its so confusing!!! #i want to bite someone #maybe i should draw something of miette and - #less mmiseeable that way Maybe? #my head hurts #god i have so many assignments due tommorow. i have to make a stupid fucking storybook and animation i just #i wish i could just not deal with anything #i hate school i want to lie on the ground forever #i hate ruin i hste rainy aahhhgg!!! i hate wveryone ever #theyre all stupid and make no sense #i fucking hate ruin #i dotn know why #i dont have a reason #he just makes me so mad #i think its just. sngry about things #i wanna spend more time with him but #agh #i want to word it i really do #i hate him #i dont think im in danger so this bad mood could be cured by curling up into blankets and watching something comforting #why am i so emotional i throw tantrums like this so often agh!!! #i think i know why i hate ruin and its the fact im clingy and hes drifty or whatever #theres stuff he says that i hate and makes me mad and we clash in mannerisms i suppose? i dont know #im too small to word i feel like epxloding itno crumbs i will simply die

[fucklife101]

I don’t know how many “just make it through today”s I’ve got left.

#mentally exhausted #i dont want to be here #im losing hope #tw depressing stuff #i’m so alone #self h@rm #mental health relapse #i hate my existence #anxi4ty #deppresing quotes

[stoned-rock]

...

..

.

#im so close to relapse and im scared #i havent self harmed in over two years and it makes me feel horrible when i do relapse but my god #i feel so weak and fragile and pathetic #i dont think we have any disposable razors at all in this house #i have scissors or a knife but i really dont know if theres the right tool yknow #im happy to have an excuse to not do it #i dont want to relapse #i just want to feel better.

[buttonnosebunny]

ate a bowl of pasta and now i feel so guilty 🙃

#been feeling real bad lately #with food and body issues #i dont want to relapse

[razberrypuck]

thinking about the undersea again. can't wait for gillion "don't practice what you preach" tidestrider to see the elders again ESPECIALLY after being factory reset in the navy stronghold. can't wait for chip and jay, who KNOW what they did to him to some extent, to bring up everything he's told them (about being good enough for yourself, about standing up to authority figures, about doing what YOU think is right) only for him to keep making excuses for the elders. to keep defending them when they really, truly do not deserve it. can't wait for jay and chip to finally see him acting like the soldier the elders raised in full. to see him stonefaced and rigid, always at attention, hesitant to speak to the elders unless spoken to. to look in his eyes when the elders address him, and seeing only fear. can't wait fo-- *gets shot*

#i think we as a society dont talk abt gillions hypocrisy enough. anyway. #i think even if he HADNT sat in The Torture Chair hed still have this kind of mindset when meeting the elders again #hes always made excuses for them;; as recently as /ep 98/ #but now its worse. bc now hes gone back to WANTING to be the perfect little soldier they made. #i think #after the tree #this relapse mightve happened anyway #not to this extent but. it wouldve happened eventually. #i love making myself emotional over things that Havent Happened Yet :) #jrwi riptide #jrwi #just roll with it #jrwi show #gillion tidestrider #jrwi gillion

[jadesuicaedere]

TW - my personal ana tips:

Personal note: If you do have an eating disorder or know someone who does please get the help you/they need to heal. Eating disorders can cause many short-term and long-term issues, and is a really horrible thing to go through, no matter how severe!!

Tips:

-Eat food with really small utensils, and on a really small plate, so that it seems like bigger portions.

-Don't set a specific number of calories to do, set a small limit - so instead of exactly 48cals, say between 0-80cals.

-Drink LOTS of water!!

-Drink green tea, it helps to suppress hunger and burns fat.

-When you do eat, make sure you eat healthy - fruit and vegetables with lots of protein, to keep your body healthy and fulfilled.

-Wear thicker/baggier clothes, it makes sure that you and others are unable to see your body, it will also keep you warm.

-Space exercise evenly throughout the day, do not push it all out at once - it's proven to be less effective for weight loss.

-Chew gum when you are hungry!!

-Make sure you rest your body, this is so you don't wear yourself out and can stay healthy, whilst the body is also able to burn fat quicker.

-Keep yourself occupied so you are less likely to think about eating.

-Have mantras that help you reach your gw - e.g. 'you're not hungry, you're bored.' or 'a moment on the lips, forever on the hips', etc.

-If eating something packeted - don't eat the whole thing, only eat a little, so you don't have the urge to binge.

-Look at #thinspo to help you not to binge.

-Make sure you research and read for the calories of different foods - different brands can be different, and it's good to remember.

-If you have really bad nausea, have a little bit of salt in your water, or some honey/sweetener in your tea/coffee.

-If you are really hungry, unable to function, having issues, or overall concerned, you need to eat - even if it's small, eat a good meal.

-Weigh yourself with an empty body for accurate results if you genuinely want to know, otherwise weigh yourself at least twice each day to work out your rough average.

-Take small bites of food, chew a lot and sip water, taking your time whilst eating to feel fuller, and look like you're eating more.

Overall, if you need to eat, then eat. Don't be afraid to, especially if you're in trouble. These are just my personal tips I use for myself, and my friends if they need - and are not by any professionals. Stay safe and healthy my ed friends. 🩷💜

#mental health #i dont want to be here #im losing hope #ed relapse #ed sheeran #depressing shit #im fine #ed disorder #ed #ed meals #ed bullshit #ed rant #eat d1sorder #thinspo #thinspø #tw thinspi #thinner #ana #ana girl #ana tricks #ana tips #4n4blr #4n4rexia #4n4t1ps #4n4m1a #stay safe #tips #tricks #help me lmao #relapse

[your-penguiny]

the opening scene of s6 felt like watching saw and i was genuinely scared i had the same

look on my face the entire time . the music , the filter , the filming style ................

#halfway through the first episode i dont know how he hasnt relapsed yet bc just watching makes me want to #house md #greg house #gregory house

[epilogueofbones]

I want to be high on that feeling of hunger every day. I don’t want it to fade away. It feels comforting and familiar and victorious. I’ll make myself at home here.

#tw ana related #tw ana shit #ana #ana trigger #anarec1a #ed but not sheeran #thinspi #tw ana vent #3dtumblr #ana stuff #body ch3ck #dont report just block #i want to be thin #sweetspo #tw ana diet #tw ana relapse #thin$p0 #it's not as simple as just eating #im not hungry #3d f4st #f4st!ng

[shuaaflower]

I don’t want to bother people, but I really don’t know what to do or to think rn

#tw depressing thoughts #alone with my thoughts #depressing shit #feeling alone #sad thoughts #self h@rm #tw selfhate #depressing post #im useless #im crying #self h@te #i dont want to be here #i relapsed again #struggling mentally #i am not mentally well #mental problems #mentally exhausted #sadnees

[crazzyy4me]

Skipping a meal is starting to feel good. It’s like an addiction.

#thin$po #tw ed relapse #ed diet #bonespø #thin$p0 #dont report just block #i wanna disappear #i want to be bones #i wish i was thinner #meanspø #meanspp #tw ed vent

[b4ry0nyx]

No matter how much weight i lose I’ll never feel good enough

#thinneristhewinner #ana is my friend #3ating d1sorder #ed relapse #starv1ng #light as a feather #4nerex1a #4nor3xia #ed blogg #tw 3d vent #3dtumblr #i dont want to exist #i just want to be thin #i dont exist #i dont wanna do this anymore #want to die #want to disappear

[fucklife101]

I’m so fucking disgusted with myself.

#mentally exhausted #i dont want to be here #im losing hope #tw depressing stuff #i’m so alone #self h@rm #mental health relapse #i hate my existence #anxi4ty #deppresing quotes

[fadingfandreamland]

relapsed and don't even feel relieved, I feel like a stupid piece of shit, and I know I am one

#dont even have proper aftercare stuff and #its 10:30 #cvtaddict #i want to cvt #988blr #cvtting relapse #styroblr #s3lf mutilation #slef harn

[emjjs-blog]

Do it for...

♡ the thigh gap

♡ the confidence

♡ the cute clothes

♡ to be the skinniest in the room

♡ others jealousy

♡ wrapping your entire hand around your waist and arms

♡ to feel clean

♡ to be picked up at ease

♡ to be able to eat without feeling judged

♡ to look cute while eating

#tw ed but not sheeran #thinspø #🕯️as a feather #i need to lose so much weight #⭐️ve #i wish i was weightless #i want to lose weight #tw food #wl #i will lose weight #⭐️vation goals #best way to lose weight #ed relapse #ed disorder #ed #weightloss #fuck my body #how to loss fat #fat burn #thinneristhewinner #i just want to be thin #thinspp #thinsperation #why am i like this #bing3 eating #i dont want to binge #tw binging #fat

[the-odyssey-of-a-clown]

I relapsed today .....

Sorry

#tw self destructive behavior #tw sui ideation #tw self destruction #self half #relapse #🎭 rambles #idk if i should tell them (my suport group)about it yet i dont want them to be sad #slef harm #slef harn

[cosmobrain00]

well🙂

#*visibly trying not to burst into tears* hey guys whats up #surprise surprise another absence bc my life can’t stop getting WORSE evry day it seems haha! #so. now who’s gonna tell me how u deal w the loss of ur fave person n the one person u were 100% certain truly loved u no matter what #who also inspired u to be an artist in the first place n who's been there for u ur ENTIRE life #like idk how to start dealing w it lmao. one min ill be basically okay n then the next ill feel like smthing just tore a chunk out of me #looked outside just a sec ago n thought “oh so she'll never see my progress in art. oh ill never get to make another painting for her” #n yk part of me just wants to pretend like none of it happened honestly #like “hey that was a fucked up dream oh well let me call [x] n tell them I love them” #n I dont fucking KNOW how to deal w this grief n idk whats normal n what isnt #no I havent cried rlly but almost every day I feel like I cant breathe n tht my chest is collapsing in on itself #no I cant talk abt it but i can’t draw like I used to n thinking abt my last art project makes me wanna throw up #< considering it was going to be a present for her tht she'll never get to see. Haha so funny right guys #fuck I need to get so entirely drunk over this now RELAPSING TIME BABY!! #anyways. will try to be normal tm n talk to ppl again instead of isolating as a way to cope n sorry to ppl who have msg'd me Ill be back