#if Dean isn’t bi then why strictly??????????

[riverwithoutbanks]

I know it’s probably been said to death but Sam going ‘you’re strictly into dick now?’ Makes me feral.

What do you mean strictly

come here I jsust want to talk come closer I won’t bite I swear come put your hand inside my cage juysyggsdbb-

#no but fr #he could just have said ‘are you into dick now?’ #same effect #same pun #if Dean isn’t bi then why strictly?????????? #and Sam KNEW #ghostfacers effect much? #spn #dean is bi

[hereticpridevinyl]

Ok I finished your gay!dean manifesto and SCREEEEEEEEEEEEE!! I am incabible of putting words together and sounding coherent cause my brain is melting from my ears and psalms 40:2 has gone and replaced it. Gonna think about it for life but honestly it’s made me such a gay!dean stan now! Can I hear more of your thoughts on it and just why cause it’s so big-brained snd there but I feel like my head has been caved in by the concept cause how tf am i only seeing this NOW???

first of all, i'm so glad you enjoyed my fic! thanks for reading :)

as for the gay dean brainrot... WELCOME BESTIE, JOIN US! gonna preface this all by saying that i adore every sexuality headcanon for dean (except straight—vile energy. evil, even, and wrong) and as a bi person i would be remiss if i didn't acknowledge how wonderful bi dean is. however. HOWEVER.

(under the cut because this got away from me enormously)

i've talked about this a lot on twitter, and i know a lot of people have said this more eloquently than i, but i'll try to sum up my thoughts here.

the way dean is into women is so incredibly performative that often it can't help but be read as an act. there's almost a routine to it: dean meets Beautiful Woman, dean flirts with Beautiful Woman, dean (sometimes, but not always) sleeps with Beautiful Woman, dean pats himself on the back for fulfilling his role of Most Hetero Man In America. it's as if being into women is another aspect of his job, another skill he was taught and forced to utilize, much the same way he was taught to hunt. in early seasons, dean's interactions with woman quickly gain a stale, rote sort of taste. we as the audience expect dean will hit on any attractive woman he sees; dean as a character seems to expect it of himself. there's no anticipation behind these interactions. they're predictable and often lead nowhere—especially if dean thinks the woman is unattainable. dean's hot-blooded all-american cishet lady's man persona is just that—a persona.

we see the cracks in this persona most often during moments that are ostensibly played for laughs. haha, dean likes a show about a sexy male doctor! he gets flustered when he's around the lead haha! he's so masculine and straight and tough but he falls apart when his favorite wrestler shakes his hand and winks at him! he can't form a coherent sentence when he thinks this man is flirting with him, and he's so flustered that he doesn't try to stop it haha! he's psyching himself up for this hookup with a woman because it's funny if he's not confident! look, he likes wearing panties and his comfy bed and cooking for his family and dressing up like a cowboy but those are all things he does in private because he's actually very straight and manly! see? in an effort to make dean seem incontrovertibly heterosexual, his character becomes a parody of himself. these brief moments that we're supposed to laugh at become tragic; watching dean winchester perform his compulsory heterosexuality becomes a waiting game, seeking out those flashes of his true self, his most genuine self, from-moment-to moment.

and then something insane happens: post-season 12, dean stops hooking up with women at all.

his hookups had been waning in the two or three seasons leading up to this point, but after s12 he stops trying completely. it's as if that aggressive need to perform this learned role eventually died out. he just... stops. late seasons dean is a man who would rather stay home and watch lost boys with his husband and his brother and their son for the millionth time than have sex with a woman he's never going to see again. this is who he becomes—and the show forgets to make us laugh this time.

and we all know that supernatural has a disease that almost always keeps them from writing women well—all marginalized groups, actually, but that's a topic for another rambling post—which could be a significant factor as to why dean's most compelling romance-coded relationships are with men, but it can't be the only reason. sam's relationships with women are frequently interesting to watch, and if not groundbreaking, they seem natural. there isn't anything forced or performative about sam being into a woman. obviously the brothers are very different people and cannot be compared one-to-one, but there's definitely something to be said about sam's lack of go crazy go stupid hot girl summer star-crossed lovers cas-benny-crowley situation that dean's got going on at all times.

in my opinion, the best chemistry dean has with a woman is charlie—and while that's very strictly platonic seeing as she's a whole lesbian and probably wouldn't go for dean even if she wasn't, it's undeniable that there's just something intoxicating about watching them on screen together. while i might be biased with this analysis, i think it's worth pointing out: it's like dean's letting out a breath he's been holding his whole life when he's with her. because he knows she's unavailable, he knows there's no world in which she'd be into him, and therefore he doesn't have to bother putting on his macho straight dude persona. he doesn't have to go through the motions of hitting on her, or sleeping with her, because it's out of the question. he can be himself. turns out, "himself" is a huge fucking nerd who likes to pretend he's someone he isn't and hang out with a woman because he loves being her friend and not any other reason. the axe of heterosexuality is no longer hanging over his head.

there's a throwaway interaction way back in s2e11 that sums this up more succinctly than i can:

DEAN: of course, the most troubling question is why do these people assume we're gay?

SAM: well, you are kinda butch. probably think you're overcompensating.

DEAN: (pause) right.

we've got some splendid jacting here where dean gets control of the vessel for a moment and sort of nervously smiles at sam, a sad kind of scoff that just gets me. here's another moment where we're supposed to laugh, but there's nothing funny about the way dean reacts to sam's words. there's no overblown anger, there's no begrudging laugh, he doesn't roll his eyes. he just smiles. looks down. doesn't argue.

#i am SO SORRY at how long this is aslkdfj #i'm just extremely passionate #gay dean #dean winchester #spn #passionfruixts #ask box

[im-some-lionheart]

Dean Winchester is bisexual as fuck headcanons:

Dean has always known he's bisexual. He probably didn't even know bisexuality was A Thing until he was in his 30s though.

And he probably hated putting a label on it. But he knew he liked boys as well as girls since forever.

When he was younger, he probably thought everyone else liked everyone too because "people are hot. why wouldn't you like people?" (13 yo dean, probably)

Teen!Dean cuffed his jeans. I don't have neither proofs nor doubts about this one.

He learned about and internalized homophobia later in his teens. Probably at school, or from John's and other hunters' remarks and jokes. Or both.

He probably thought to himself "well, at least I like girls too, so it's not as bad, I'm not actually queer." and proceeded to suppress his feelings for boys and over compensate because he didn't want to be outed as something that he wasn't. He wasn't gay. He was just him. And people were hot. So he liked people.

Of course, he eventually dated guys in school, but it was always in secrecy, always as friends, always while publicly making out with a cheerleader (a bonus in immature dean's brain). It was the 90s in Middle America. It couldn't have been otherwise.

In some schools though, word caught on, and it was hell for him. He learned soon to keep that side of him hidden from privy eyes if he wanted to be left alone.

John caught him making out with a guy at least once. He might have punched Dean, give the guy time to gather his clothes and run for his live, and gone for a drink. Or. He might have stood there, staring at his son, ask the kid to leave please, and walked out of the room without saying another word. (or it happened twice and he did both)

Either way, he told Sam and Dean to pack their stuff and moved them to another city the very next day, giving Dean no chance to say goodbye.

Dean bi!panicked and tried to explain, but John refused to listen. Refused to even acknowledge what had happened. Every time Dean started "dad, about what you saw...", John would cut him off and remind him of his mission: watch out for Sammy.

He made sure next time his father came home, he found him with a girl instead. John didn't say a word to him either way, but he was polite to the girls.

Dean eventually mastered the art of flirting subtly, walking perfectly that line between figuring out if a guy was into him and outing himself into being beaten senseless.

He walked that line masterfully for years hunting with John and then, later on, with Sam. Neither noticed when he'd come home late after they'd interrogated a particularly handsome suspect.

He always made sure they noticed when he'd come home late, when the suspect was a particularly beautiful girl.

He may or may not have learned to walk that line by being beaten senseless a couple of times.

When he saw Lisa again, he couldn't believe she was still as beautiful as he remembered her.

He cried when he told Lisa he was bi. He kept thinking "she needs to know" and made a whole deal of telling her, dragging the words for half an hour. She just smiled and kissed him and held him as he cried. That was the first night he thought he loved her.

A part of him wished he was actually Ben's father. A large part of him always regretted not being able to have or truly enjoy that apple-pie life.

He knew Jo was bi too since the moment he saw her. They bonded over it. They may or may not have made out once.

He absolutely 100% had A Thing™ with Benny in Purgatory

He absolutely 100% had a threesome with himself and Cas from 2014.

He absolutely 100% had orgies with Crowley when he was a demon

There's a 50% chance he had 1on1 sex with Crowley.

He always thought Jimmy Novak was hot but he didn't begin to fall for Cas until around s6-7

His subtle brand of flirting didn't work with Cas immediately like it had worked with Anna, Benny, and so many other people and creatures he'd met throughout his life, so he just dropped it.

Dean's flirting didn't work because the angel was really bad at social interactions not because he didn't like Dean back, but he wasn't sure so he never dared do anything more than just flirt, out of both trauma and fear of being rejected by his best friend.

He jerks off while smelling the trenchcoat in s8 at least once. He, of course, cries immediately afterwards.

He sees the world around him become increasingly more progressive and he loves it. He'd never come out or go to a parade or get married but he loves that other people can have those options.

He never tells Sam how he feels about men/Cas in particular because why would he risk losing his brother's love and respect like that?

A part of him knows Sam won't care, he's still his brother. But the other part never left that motel room where John caught him making out with his friend.

He's convinced himself he doesn't need to tell anybody because it's his life and who gives a shit. He doesn't need to prove anything.

He eventually gets used to his and Cas' relationship. He loves the dynamic they have, and though he sometimes wishes he could just ravage the angel, he knows it's not an option. So he accepts it and learns to enjoy their relationship for what it is: strictly platonic. So he stops flirting and accepts Cas as his best friend. Nothing more.

This means, he's furious when Cas confesses to him. Of course you'd do this when it's already too late you son of a bitch.

In the middle of the tears and the anger and the regret, he manages to say "and I you, Cas" and his heart breaks when the portal opens, which means those words brought Cas true happiness.

He tries to move on without the angel but it isn't easy. He eventually finds an excuse to die quickly. Some dumb hunt his daddy never finished. Sure, that'll do.

When he finally hears the words "Hello, Dean" once again, he knows himself the happiest man on Earth Heaven.

#i may or may not #Be projecting #Dean Winchester #bisexual dean winchester #bi!dean #spn #supernatural #destiel in heaven #destiel is fucking canon #Dean is so bi it hurts #Dean is bi #dean is bi in spanish #Dean headcanons #Headcanons #supernatural headcanon #destiel headcanons

[katymacsupernatural]

The Proposal Part 5

Jensen Ackles x Reader

Story Summary: Jensen needs help keeping his life in order. To keep the media off his back. In order to do so, he comes up with a plan. Y/N, just a producer’s assistant, is pulled in to play a part she never thought she would have. Jensen’s fiancee. Only will it stay as a part to play, or will she start to want more?

Catch Up Here: Masterpost

(still in love with this header by the talented @impala-dreamer​)

                                     ________________________                                  

Your jean-clad knee continued to shake up and down, your foot nervously tapping the floor of the airplane. Your hand was clasped tightly on the armrest, your breaths coming quick and short.

Jensen leaned over, whispering in your ear. “Relax.”

“I hate planes,” you muttered, barely glancing at him as another round of turbulence had the plane rocking slightly.

“You haven’t flown much have you?” He asked, trying to pull your attention away from your fear. 

Shaking your head, you let his mossy green eyes pull in your attention. “Never really had the money, or need to,” you answered, your grip relaxing slightly. 

He frowned slightly. “I’m sorry to hear that. Is that why you took the money?”

“Can we not talk about that,” you insisted. You didn’t want Jensen to feel sorry for you, or know more about your private life than he needed to. Especially since he had made it adamant that this whole thing was going to be strictly business.

“Of course,” he agreed quickly. “Did you look over the notes I gave you?”

You had. His family seemed nice from what he had written down in his notes. You had spent most of the night awake, too nervous to sleep, and had done more research than just his notes. You had scoured the internet, finding pictures, looking over articles there hadn't been much, but you felt better for the effort. 

"Good. I just wanted you to have a heads up. My family is nice, and they’ll welcome you in, but I have a feeling this proposal is going to be a little bit of a shock.”

“Why? I mean beside them having never met me,” you mumbled. “But Jensen, I still can’t get it. You’re...well you’re you. There has to have been someone you...cared about.”

His smile faltered. “There was. But she’s long gone, and that’s why I wanted to do this. It’s simple. Gives me a chance to breathe without all those freaking questions. I hate lying, but this is better.”

You didn’t know what to say to that. This handsome, highly sought after man forced to have a fake proposal just to get some relaxation. You felt sorry for him. 

The plane landed not too long after that. Jensen kept you close to his side while you shuffled past the rest of the crowded airport. Neither of you had packed more than an overnight bag, so you were able to skip the baggage claim and head right out front. Then it was finding an Uber. Jensen had assured you that he had a place down here in Texas and that you would have your own room. But you hadn’t expected his place to be huge. It was two stories, the front a mixture of stucco and stone. He parked in the garage, and you stepped into the house to see a huge, open floor concept.

“Kitchen’s over there,” Jensen pointed to the left. “Should be fully stocked. The living room as you can see is there. Then there is the game room and my study. Upstairs is four rooms. I had the first one on the left made up for you.”

You followed him up the winding staircase, staying back as he pushed open the door to what was going to be your room. For this weekend, and whenever you had to travel down here with him. The room was large with a beautiful hand-carved wooden headboard. A nightstand and dresser were the only other furniture in the room. A door on the left led to your own personal bathroom. Everything was done in neutral tones and was immaculate. 

“If you don’t like this one, I can…,” Jensen started to say, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. 

“No, it will be fine,” You assured him, setting your bag down beside the bed. 

“Great,” he sighed. “Listen, I’m going to work in the study for a little bit. There’s a pool outback. Why don’t you swim for a little bit and relax? We won’t leave for a couple of hours yet. I’d like to get to the brewery, check out things before dinner.”

He left you alone in the room, and you took a deep breath, trying to relax. Today had been a little overwhelming so far, and a swim sounded like a perfect way to let go of some of your nerves. Pulling your simple black one piece from your duffle bag, you quickly changed, putting your hair up out of the way.

With a plush towel from the bathroom and your flip flops on, you went back down the staircase, turning left towards the french doors at the back. Jensen’s voice could barely be heard through the thick oak door. For a moment you wished he would stop and join you. He seemed like he needed the relaxation just as much as you did. 

Stepping onto the deck, you were amazed at his backyard. Lush and well-manicured, there was a large deck and entertaining area. The pool was good-sized, with a waterfall at one end. Lounge chairs were placed close by. “Wow,” you whispered. 

Toeing off your flip flops, you dropped the towel on a chair. Sitting down on the edge of the pool, you dangled your feet in. The water was cool and felt wonderful against the warm Texas sun. 

Sliding in, you went completely under, letting the water wash completely over you. 

You lost track of time while enjoying the pool. Swimming up and down, floating and letting the sun warm your skin. You couldn’t even remember the last time you had been able to swim.

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” Jensen spoke up, standing at the edge of the pool. “Just being able to let the water wash everything away.”

“Yeah,” you agreed. “What time is it?”

“Just enough time for you to take a shower and get ready,” he answered, moving over to the lounge chair, holding up your towel. You climbed the steps, walking over to Jensen. His eyes raked over your swimsuit-clad body, his jaw clenching for a moment before he wrapped the towel around you. His eyes were unreadable as they stared into yours. He let go of the towel, and you caught it, holding it together under your chin. Tugging his bottom lip between his teeth for a moment, he sighed. “Go get ready,” he ordered, and you were quick to comply.

Read Chapter 6

Dean/Jensen Tags: @acortez82​​ @acreativelydifferentlove​​ @adoptdontshoppets​​ @a-girl-who-loves-disney​​ @akshi8278​​   @bi-danvers0​​  @cap-just-said-language​​ @colette2537​​   @deansgirl215​​  @flamencodiva​​ @hamiltrash1411​​ @its-not-a-tulpa​​ @jerkbitchidjitassbutt​​ @justanotherwinchester​​ @just-another-winchester​​ @karouwinchester​​ @keikoraventeller​​  @krys198478​​ @librarygeekery​​ @magssteenkamp​​ @misspygmypie​​ @mlovesstories​​ @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk​​  @mrspeacem1nusone​​ @nothinbuttrouble2​​ @ria132love​​ @ruprecht0420​​  @screechingartisancashbailiff​   @sortaathief​​ @superseejay721517​​ @squirrelnotsam​​ @team-free-will-you-idjiot​​ @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​​ @torn-and-frayed​​ @tricksterdean​​ @wonderfulworldofwinchester​​ @woodworthti666​​

The Proposal Tags: @supraveng​ @vicmc624​ @lottieellz101 @impala-dreamer​ @maddiepants​ @emilyshurley​ @tonystark-makes-me-cry​ @starryeyeseunbyul​  @rach-12​ @spnfamily-j2​ @ima-be-a-mongoose​ @flamencodiva​ @compresshischest09​ @parinarain​  @stoneyggirl​  @tftumblin​

Forever Tags:  @aditimukul​​ @alexwinchester23​​ @algud​​ @amanda-teaches​​ @andreaaalove​​   @artisticpoet​​ @atc74​​ @be-amaziing​​ @camelotandastronauts​​ @caswinchester2000​​ @cpag7​​ @chelsea072498​​  @closetspngirl​​ @deanwanddamons​​ @docharleythegeekqueen​​ @emoryhemsworth​​ @ericaprice2008​​  @esoltis280​​   @foxyjwls007​​ @gh0stgurl​​ @goldenolaf25​​ @growningupgeek​​  @heartislubbingdubbing​​ @heyitscam99​​ @hobby27​​ @horsegirly99​​ @imsuperawkward​​ @internationalmusicteacher​​ @iwriteaboutdean​​  @jayankles​​ @jensen-gal​​ @justsomedreaming​​ @just-another-busyfangirl @karlee-fay-my-wayward-son​​ @linki-locks11​​ @littleblue5mcdork​​  @lowlyapprentice​​   @mersuperwholocked-lowlife​​ @mogaruke​​ @monkeymcpoopoo​​ @musiclovinchic93​​  @nanie5​​   @percussiongirl2017​​ @plaid-lover-bay25​​   @roonyxx​​ @ronja-uebrick​​ @roxyspearing​​  @samanddeanmyheroes​​ @sandlee44​​ @shamelesslydean​​ @simonsbluee​ @sillesworldofwriting​​ @sgarrett49​​ @spnbaby-67​​ @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester​​ @spnwoman​​   @superbadassnatural​​ @thatcrazybookwormgeek​​   @thewinchesterchronicles​​ @vvinch3st3r​​  @whimsicalrobots​​ @winchester-writes​​ @zombiewerewolfqueen​​

#the proposal #jensen ackles x reader #supernatural x reader #supernatural rpf #supernatural reader insert #katy writes #spn fanfic #jensen fanfic #jensen x y/n #y/n #jensen #fanfic

[supertransural]

Beyond the Mat, sort of meta?

Ok so for some personal context, I’ve been rewatching all of Supernatural and i have the firm intention to keep the show on repeat on my computer/tv until i’ve fully binged it 15 times (never fear, I am already perfectly aware of how bad a decision this is). I wrote this post with a frantic need to get all the thoughts out, but it happened to be 3am at the time, and I realized I had to make gifs and upload them which was obviously too much work for a sleep deprived brain. I put it off until the next day, but ended up procrastinating and now it's been sitting in my drafts for 3 months and I thought hey this is a good time to finish it up (it could be argued that i'm polishing up this thing at 5am and this doesn't seem to be an issue for my will to get this done this time around, although I am heavily caffeinated so maybe that has something to do with it, go figure).

Anyways that’s besides the point. At the time I had just gotten to 11x15, Beyond the Mat. I’ve seen people write a lot about how parallels between Sam and Dean’s love lives/interests are part of the subtext about Dean’s bisexuality. I’ve also read people's works about how Gunner is pretty obviously one of Dean’s youth celebrity crushes. But (and I might just be a bit blind or haven’t looked hard enough) I haven’t seen a lot about the parallel between Sam/Rio and Dean/Gunner.

So let's get down to business, shall we?

The scene I will be focusing on starts out with Dean utterly star struck, sort of mumbling awkwardly his reasoning for coming up to Gunner (x) (x). Interestingly enough, Sam does the exact same thing with Rio (x) (x), while Dean is in the other corner clasping Gunner's hand for way too long and way too tight, and giving him the “i’ve loved you ever since i met you” look (x) (x).

Now since Sam’s crush is strictly heterosexual and we all know Sam’s interest in women, he outright says it to Rio (this is, after all, the CW) (x) (x). Dean on the other hand doesn’t verbalize it in so many words (the CW), but cmon... That fluster when Gunner winks at him later on?? (x) (let's not forget the little leg pat (x) that is probably still etched in Dean's memory amongst the 20 best things that ever happened to him, behind the previously-mentioned-wink and the Cartwright Twins) Or his reaction to Gunner patting his arm, "ok ok don't panic, it's not like your childhood crush just touched you oh wait". And Literally His Unwavering Smile The Whole Way Through. Jacting choices, people, Jacting choices (x).

Sam saves himself by steering the conversation towards a type of "where are they now?" interview, and Rio follows his not-so-subtle attempt, with a heavily implied tint of nostalgia for the good old days (x). Dean pulls a very similar stunt, mentioning something about his and Gunner's past (x) (x). Rio and Gunner's faces in those clips resemble each other quite a great deal: the emotion is the same, regret.

I really love that parallel because it’s really just “in your face”. You see Dean getting all flustered, at that point you could still say “hey i love [insert celebrity] and i don’t have a crush on them, but i’d probably still react that way around them”. (First of all, if I were you, I'd go on a journey of soul searching because hello, it’s ok to have crushes on celebrities you wish you didn’t, we’ve all been 12 and we’ve all seen Twilight and we’re all ashamed, and second of all, would you really and I mean really react that same way?) But then, enters Sam and his old crush, from the same field, basically the same time period, the same place and roughly the same "community". And it’s an unapologetic crush, not just a “hhhahaha i loved your uh.... your work.... as a uh kid haha.....”. Nonono. He says it, he tells her that he “used” (i’m not sure it’s completely gone, just like Dean) to have a crush on her. And then boom, parallel.

The way the two interact with both “celebrities” isn’t that different, if anything, Sam is less awkward around Rio than Dean is with Gunner. I’m betting the reason why is that since Sam’s crush is a woman, he has 1: talked about it openly before with his family (a poster of your crush on your wall is a good way to do that) and 2: talked to other crushes like her before. Dean, for obvious reasons, has not. Not a man, maybe some girlfriends, but he was never open (specifically not to John) about a potential crush he had on the big wrestler man in the ring, because he’s supposed to be this manly manly ladies man. He’s much more awkward because he hasn’t had much of an opportunity to talk to his crushes that might have been men, so the entire ordeal is wayyy more foreign to him. And he was also just a fan, so the whole “oh my god oh my god” of the crush is added to the already existing “oh my god oh my god” of his inner (and outer let's not kid ourselves) fanboy self.

Dean’s reaction is incidentally very similar to the one he has in the Fat Spa in 9x13, The Purge, with the character called Larry, Maritza’s husband. Dean’s awkward, goes too far, slightly flustered, and he’s pretty clearly not thrown off because of Maritza in that interview room, his gaze is mostly going from Sam to Larry then back to Sam. He lightly brushes over Maritza but barely looks at her (x) (x).

I’d also like to point out that when Gunner enters the stage, there’s a hint at a bi flag created by the light show, blink and you'll miss it (x). But then again that could just be the fact that those lights look pretty together and I'm completely insane. I’m not going to push that one too far, but since Gunner winks at Dean after that, which as I said before, makes Dean look adorably happy and flustered..... Take that as you will.

There's a thousand other scenes relevant to Dean being very blatantly bi-coded in Beyond the Mat (seriously, it's almost as obvious as the siren episode) but I really just wanted to focus on the parallel this time. I might go even more in depth on that episode (or do it bit by bit) if I ever find the will to make more gifs and string intelligible words together to create coherent sentences, and give off the impression of a sane mind. Might even throw in some The Purge meta for fun. Yes my definition of fun is quite warped.

#this took much too long #i'm just so bad at gifs and my wifi doesn't help #uploading takes hours #anyways imma shut up now #i've talked far too much already #spn meta #spn 11x15 #beyond the mat #spn 9x13 #spn analysis #spn #supernatural #bidean #bi dean #dean #dean winchester

[sam-winchester-wears-makeup]

Not to go off but can y'all on tumblr stop dragging Jensen Ackles through the fucking mud he doesn't deserve it. He's an LGBTQ+ ally and has been for years. A lot of you didn't even see the show let alone the episode in question so you shouldn't be blindly accusing Jensen of being a homophobe. Jensen has as mentioned in another post played a bisexual man who had threeways with Marliyn Monroe and his character was also a lover to Patrick Dempsey's character in the same show, a 2001 mini series called Blonde. Jensen has been nothing but supportive and kind to members of the SPN fandom who identify as part of the LGBTQ+ community when interacting with them. Just because he personally doesn't ship Destiel doesn't make him homophobic. I don't ship it and that doesn't make me homophobic either. I don't say that because I'm pansexual but because I don't hate on the ship or those who enjoy it or y'know anyone who isn't cishet whether they're fictional or not.

On the topic of Dean he had many things on his mind when his best friend gave that confession before being taken away by the Empty. There was literally someone outside the door of the room they were in trying to kill them and he was having a hard time processing the fact that a lot of the people he knew and cared about got snapped out of existence. Regularly he has a very hard time dealing with his emotions and it takes a few episodes for him to open up because he tends to keep his emotions bottled up inside so processing something like that in under a minute when he has to worry about keeping the two of them alive while he's also grieving would be kinda hard.

May I also point out Castiel has told both Winchester boys he loves them. They are his found family and showed him he could make his own decisions instead of being heaven's loyal dispensable little soldier. The boys treated him with kindness and compassion, taught him how to feel emotions and be his own person, watched his back, stuck with him through thick and thin, taught him to enjoy the small stuff.

Whether Castiel meant he loved Dean in a romantic way or not is up for debate but the SPN fandom should keep in mind that the showrunners did not give him a set sexuality so you cannot strictly say he is gay or bi or pan and decide for the entirety of the fandom what his sexuality is. Having your own opinion on the matter is perfectly fine but forcing your opinion onto others and hating on the people who do not share your opinion is not okay. People can continue to write their Destiel fics with renewed vigor if they so choose to and people who write Castiel x reader insert fics or Dean x reader insert fics can continue on as well because Cas has no set sexuality and the whole fandom can continue to enjoy writing him as they wish.

Castiel's sexuality is probably going to become a topic of great conflict in the foreseeable future because there will be those who argue he is gay due to his confession to Dean while there will be those who argue against that. I would like to point out angels do not view gender and sexuality as humans do. An angel is basically just a soul inhabiting a human vessel, they do not care what gender they inhabit, a vessel is a vessel. Castiel did not care whether he inhabited Claire's body or Jimmy's he just needed a vessel and being a vessel is a familial trait that only certain lines carry, he only left Claire's body because Jimmy's dying wish was for Cas to inhabit his instead of his daughter's so she wouldn't go through what he went through. Angels basically see each other more or less as souls inhabiting vessels so why would they care about a human's body or gender identity if they liked said human for their personality. What is on the inside is what matters. If a human has an attractive body but personality wise is an unsufferable cunt why would an angel or anyone for that matter like them? Angels or at least Castiel are more likely (in my mind at least) to be attracted to someone's personality and their soul rather than just their physical attributes because angels don't really naturally have physical attributes they can judge each other on up in heaven. Yes a few other angels told Castiel that they preferred his female vessel better than Jimmy which shows they do judge physical appearances of vessels but is Castiel the same as other angels? No. Are all people the same? No. Does physical attraction influence attraction to someone on top of their personality in most cases? Yes. But that does not mean people or angels solely like someone based on their appearance or gender. Really the only people who can confirm Cas' sexuality are the show runners but that hasn't happened so everyone is still free to write and interpret him how they please. If they do assign Castiel a sexuality in the future some people may also choose to ignore that which is also completely fine.

#Destiel #Dean Winchester #Castiel #Supernatural #Supernatural Season 15 #Jensen Ackles #Misha Collins #Supernatural Spoilers #SPN

[tendercoretroglodyke]

the reason the magicians writers were able to kill off quentin and claim it was groundbreaking of them to kill off their "unmarginalized, privileged" main character was because they never saw him as bi, they only saw him as "heteroflexible," a straight guy who could be used to bait new viewers by having him kiss his male friend. they did not see him as queer.

the reason writers (and others behind spn) dropped little hints at dean being attracted to men, whether on camera or on paper (dean acting flustered when aaron hits on him, references to dean and benny's breakup), while still never directly addressing it and acting like fans were weird for seeing dean as bi, isn't because they secretly see dean as bi, but because they think it's funny. straight people see the idea of there being anything "queer" about their macho action heroes as hilarious. hence the pink satiny panties the leather daddy dom the "are you strictly into dick now" the "did you service oberon king of the fairies" it's literally all a joke to them. that doesn't mean we can't take some of the "queer" jokes at dean's expense to support our theories dean is bi/gay, but we can't assume it means anyone behind the scenes is taking queer dean seriously.

I don't want to be mean, because obviously this treatment towards queer fans is completely unfair and hurtful. but im seeing some people who seem genuinely confused how the writers could make little hints like this and refer to dean and benny like a couple but then completely ignore addressing dean's bisexuality. again I dont mean to be rude but I wouldn't think it should come as a surprise to anyone at this point that straight people see macho men being anything but aggressively heterosexual as hilarious. they dont think bi men exist, or if they do they're a joke.

if you're trying to wrap your head around why there are "mixed messages" about dean's sexuality: it's JUST the homophobia. thats it. im sorry.

#spn #like im sorry theres not some conspiracy here theres not censorship jackles didnt just like refuse to play bi #its just. homophobia. thats what straight people are like! #i mean chances are with such a massive cast and crew some people DID see dean as queer #but it wasnt like. a secret agreed upon thing among the cast that was censored by the network or something

[notfunnydean]

I’ve fallen in love many times… but always with you

This is for @huntersociopathavenger‘s writer challenge! I really hope you like it! x

Prompt: I’ve fallen in love many times...but always with you.

Pairing: Destiel

Warnings: Too much fluff?

I also have to thank @winchester-ofthe-lord for helping me out a lot and coming up with the greatest ideas!! x

Dean is nervous.

It’s just a normal day at the bunker, but something is off. It’s not even because there is no urgent hunt at the moment, but maybe it’s because Sam is out alone today. Means Dean is left alone with Castiel and that never ends well.

Lately the angel has a lot of questions and they always leave Dean a bit embarrassed, but also way too curious for his own good. As soon as Dean would only look at a woman, Castiel asks him all about it.

It’s weird.

And that’s the only reason, why Dean stopped picking up girls. Not...because he hopes that he would   finally be the one getting asked out, by an angel or something. Dean groans and then sits down on his couch.

The Dean-Cave is his favorite room in the bunker and he could spend the rest of his life here. He grabs the remote and settles on some CIS show, when the door opens behind him and he rolls his eyes.

“Hello Dean.”

“Hey Cas.” Dean answers, but otherwise ignores him. If he gave Castiel his attention, the angel would for sure find a way to make this awkward again and Dean doesn’t do awkward. Or at least he tries.

“Mind if I sit down?” Castiel asks and Dean shakes his head. He busies himself with his beer bottle and Castiel sits down on the couch. Not directly next to Dean, but still very close. Dean kinda wants to squirm in his seat.

Luckily, for the next minutes Castiel actually watches the show. Dean is already bored. It’s the typical case with one of the agents falling in love with the other one. Dean sighs, he kinda has this bullshit in his own life, he doesn’t need to watch it as well.

“Dean?” Castiel mutters, when one of the characters finally admits her feelings to her partner.

“Hm?” Dean hums and tries to concentrate on the screen.

“Have you ever been in love?” Castiel asks and this time he has Dean’s attention. Another question. It never gets old, huh?

[Watch out for the cut]

Read on AO3

“Sure.” Dean says shortly and when he looks at his best friend, Castiel frowns. Dean is a bit surprised at that reaction. Dean is already 40, of course he has been in love before. He wasn’t a block of ice.

“Hm.” Castiel says and somehow Dean actually wants to talk about it now.

“I mean...when i was 16 I fell in love the first time. It was...you know my first love. Kinda embarrassing, but whatever. Her name was Robin. I met her, when I was at a boy’s home one summer.” Dean explains and then shrugs awkwardly in the end.

Castiel raises both eyebrows and then nods. He has a tiny smile on his face and Dean feels himself smiling, when he thinks about Robin. He regrets that he never took her out for the school dance, since John and Sammy came back early. Otherwise, he doesn’t regret anything at all.

“That sounds pleasurable.” Castiel answers and Dean snorts. One word for it, even though Dean didn’t go to the next base with her. He shakes his head.

“Yeah, after that, there was Cassie. First girl I told about the hunting. She didn’t believe me.” Dean says shortly, because he doesn’t really want to talk about her. It somehow still hurts, since there was a time, when he had thought… doesn’t matter now.

“I like the name.” Castiel says and he is grinning. Dean actually laughs loudly and claps Castiel on the shoulder. Lately his angel is a lot better with jokes.

“Do you want me to call you Cassie from now on?” Dean asks and he waggles his eyebrows. Castiel is smiling beautifully, but he is also shaking his head. Dean winks at him for good measure.

“No thank you, Dean.” Castiel says, as serious as he can, while he is still grinning. Dean is still not really used to this smile, but it looks good on Castiel. He should have fun like this more often. Dean leans back in his seat.

“And then there was Lisa… right?” Castiel asks and Dean nods shortly. If he doesn’t really want to talk about Cassie, there would be no way he’d want to start talking about Lisa again. She and Ben are so much better of without him.

“Yeah.” Dean just offers and Castiel seems to feel how awkward Dean feels to talk about this. While he knows now… that he was in love with those girls, each was  a different form of love. Robin, being the first crush, Cassie, the first ‘coming home’ and Lisa, the comfort and family he always wanted.

Silly, that he found all of this in a new person now.

“Anna?” Castiel asks quietly and Dean shakes his head. Oh god. No, the thing with Anna, well it had felt good. But he wouldn’t call it love.

“Nah. That wasn’t… love.” Dean says carefully, since Anna is in a weird way Castiel’s sister. But Castiel looks more relieved, than angry.

“I envy humans for falling in love.” Castiel says quietly and Dean’s head snaps up. He doesn’t really understand what Castiel wants to say with that.

“You never fell in love before?” Dean says and somehow his heart squeezes awfully in his chest. Maybe Castiel fell in love with the concept of humanity but not with a human himself. Dean rubs over his chest and watches Castiel carefully.

“Oh, I did.” Castiel just says and then just looks back to the TV. Dean is still trying to process Castiel’s statement. What? And then Castiel didn’t tell him or Sam that?

“Care to elaborate?” Dean asks and it sounds way more gruff, than he intended to. He feels betrayed and he knows it’s not fair, because as a best friend he should know this stuff and be happy for Castiel. Instead he feels jealous. Angry. Hurt.

“When god created us, we weren’t like you humans. We weren’t meant to fall in love. It doesn’t happen to us as often, as it does to you. But sometimes… sometimes you would hear colorful stories about an angel, who fell in love with a human, even though it was forbidden.” Castiel explains and he automatically looks up at the ceiling. Dean knows how much he misses heaven.

“And you did?” Dean asks again and Castiel sighs. He nods and then looks at his hands in his lap. Doesn’t seem like he is really happy about it.

“Years ago.” Castiel admits and Dean swallows. Right. Castiel is million years old, for sure some time there would’ve been a human he fell in love with.

“But? She didn’t like you?” Dean asks and Castiel shrugs.

“It wasn’t a woman.” Castiel just says and then he gets up. For a moment Dean believes Castiel will just leave him like that, but instead the angel goes to the fridge and takes out another bottle of beer. He offers it to Dean, who is still playing with his empty one.

“So, you like guys or what?” Dean says and his laugh sounds so fake, even to his own ears. Dean is still bad at admitting to other people that he is bi himself. He made peace with this ages ago, but around other people he is still wary. Only Charlie really knew.

“Gender doesn’t matter to me, Dean.” Castiel says and Dean nods. Yeah right. Strictly speaking, Castiel didn’t have a gender anway. Just his vessel is male. Sometimes Dean wonders, if it would’ve made a difference, if Castiel had had a different vessel.. Maybe then he would’ve asked him out.

But then again, Castiel would still be an angel and out of Dean’s league. An angel who already loves someone else. Dean coughs slightly.

“So then, tell me about your...love. Why do you like him out of all people, if you could have anyone?” Dean presses out and he doesn’t even know why he says that. Seems like he does love torture. Torturing himself. Dean leans even more back in the couch, to be ready for another heartbreak.

“There are many reasons. I fell in love with his eyes, every single time he looks into mine. Sometimes I get so lost in his eyes, that I can’t focus on anything else.” Castiel admits and he looks at Dean,  just for a second.

Dean frowns.

“He undresses you with his eyes, huh?” Dean tries to grin, but he isn’t sure, if it actually looks like a smile. It feels more like a grimace. He kinda wants to smack the guy for staring at his angel.

“Sometimes it feels like it.” Castiel says and he laughs a bit. Dean blushes, he hopes that Castiel doesn’t see how he sometimes undresses him.

Dammit.

“Gross.” Dean presses out and Castiel chuckles.

“I fell in love with the way he smiles, when he thinks nobody’s watching.” Castiel continues and Dean nods. He knows what that's like. Every so often, when Castiel is with them on a hunt, Dean watches him, smiling at a flower or some bees. Every single time he feels as if he is falling in love with Castiel again.

“So, he is really good looking, hm?” Dean wants to know and Castiel winks at him.

“He is, but that’s not what I love the most about him. Sometimes I feel like he knows how good he looks and he plays with it. Other times he feels insecure.” Castiel explains and Dean automatically sucks in his stomach.

He understands that guy. Normally Dean feels good in his body too… but sometimes he eats too much pie and only realizes later, how his tummy looks.

“What makes him so special, then?” Dean asks anyway and he takes another sip of his beer. He deserves this comfort now.

“I fell in love with his commitment for his work, the way he puts his heart into every task.” Castiel says and Dean raises his eyebrows. Seems like the guy has some serious problems with his work. Maybe he should take a break, if he does so much for every single task.

“Workaholic?” Dean asks and Castiel snorts.

“Yeah, you could say that. I wish he would take breaks more often, because he really deserves them, but he never does.” Castiel explains and Dean is lost in his own thoughts again. He kinda feels overworked as well. Maybe he should seriously think about a nice little vacation. Take Sammy with him and Castiel and… his boyfriend?

“Maybe you need to force him.” Dean says quietly and looks back at the TV. The show is over by now, but he is glad that there is some noise in the background.

“Yes, but I also fell in love with the way he takes care of his family. He puts everyone else’s needs and wellbeing over his own.” Castiel says and this time he looks at Dean while saying it. Dean can’t look away for a second.

“Family is important.” Dean chokes out and Castiel nods.

“And it doesn’t end in blood. You taught me that, Dean. I will never forget that. I always thought I had a family in heaven, but turns out, my family is right here. In a bunker.” Castiel says and he says it so determined, that Dean feels the need to confirm it.

“Yeah. You’re family, Cas.” Dean whispers. He had the thought more than once, that he wishes for Castiel to be more than family. Dean never imagined that there could be someone more important than Sam, but Castiel changed that. Dean looks away.

“I fell in love with his love for music. He likes classic rock and when he sings along to his favorite songs I feel like I never left heaven.” Castiel says and this time it’s a lot quieter. Dean doesn’t dare to look at him.

“Classic rock hm? Sounds more like my dream guy.” Dean answers and he doesn’t even realize, that Castiel gasps at him. Dean would never admit that out loud, but he actually doesn’t care what kind of music Castiel likes. Sure, he made him that mixtape and whenever he hears that Castiel listens to it, his heart beats a lot faster.

But, even if Castiel hated the music, that would be okay, too.

“I do believe you’d like him.” Castiel chuckles then and Dean shrugs with his left shoulder. Well he would pretend to like the guy, if he is that important to Castiel. He would still hate him for stealing his angel from him.

“Maybe.” Dean simply says, since he doesn’t want to fight with Castiel over this. He wishes he never made Castiel talk about his crush. This sucks a lot.

“I fell in love with his love for his car, how he treats her as his most precious possession.” Castiel continues and this time Dean frowns. These are actually a lot of coincidences. If he didn’t know better, he would think…

Dean shakes his head.

“Yeah? Is his car prettier than Baby?” Dean answers and Castiel shakes his head.

“No, I don’t think there exists a car more beautiful than Baby.” Castiel says and Dean nods. Damn right. At least he would be the winner in this kind of race. He wouldn’t get Castiel, but nobody comes even close to his Baby.

“Exactly.” Dean says proudly and Castiel snorts.

“Well, maybe my car comes close?” Castiel tries and Dean gasps loudly. Rude! Dean even leans closer and punches Castiel against the shoulder, even if it doesn’t hurt the angel at all. He needs to know that he can’t say those lies out loud.

“No way. Your pimpmobile is not even on the same planet!” Dean says and Castiel is laughing for real this time. Dean kinda wants to lean even closer and stop Castiel’s laughter with his own mouth.

“Fine. What else can I say? I fell in love with his obsession with old westerns and bad horror movies. Oh, and don’t get me started on his love for pie.” Castiel says and Dean is still so close, watching him.

Dean opens his mouth and closes it again. Castiel licks his lips.

“Pie?” Dean mouths and Castiel nods. Dean’s whole body feels as if it’s on fire. The blush is back on his face and Castiel’s gaze focuses on his cheeks. Dean wants to believe it’s because Castiel tries to count his freckles.

“Yeah, there is nothing he loves more.” Castiel answers and Dean shakes his head. He understands now, but he is still a bit unsure. Is Castiel really serious about this or is he making a joke?

“I bet there is someone he loves more.” Dean whispers and Castiel’s blue eyes widen a bit at that. Dean smiles a bit shyly, seems like Castiel is really talking about him. Dean wants to jump up and scream it into the world. He wants to sit on Castiel’s lap and stay there forever.

He doesn’t do anything. He waits.

“M-maybe you are right.” Castiel says and he stutters, when Dean looks down at his lips. Dean can’t help it and he feels better now that Castiel also seems a bit shy about it.

“I feel like I am. He could never resist you. He loves you way too much for that.” Dean says and while it’s not the confession he had dreamed of, he needs Castiel to understand this. Dean needs him too. Dean loves him too.

“I hope so.” Castiel says and he carefully puts his hand on Dean’s shoulder. Dean frowns. What is Castiel doing? But Castiel just keeps looking at him.

“What else made you fall in love with him?” Dean whispers and this time Castiel presses down on his upper arm. Right where his mark used to be.

“I fell in love with his soul, the very moment I gripped him tight and raised him from perdition.” Castiel whispers.

Dean kisses him.

#destiel #destiel fic #Destiel writing #hunters1stwritingchallenge #my writing #my fics

[tinkdw]

Honestly the fact that for Mr I’m so repressed I can’t even make a movie reference without it being gay AF Winchester we’ve had amongst many others:

“why do they think we’re gay?! - maybe they think you're overcompensating" 

"so are you strictly into dick now?"

“he was your boyfriend first”

“Dean and Crowley’s summer of love”

“well maybe I rubbed off all over you”

“you rode Larry?”

“*awkward eye blinking* there’s...no such thing... as.... fifth base...”

“whats bi is bi”

and well basically all his interactions with Cas since 4x07...

*gestures wildly at all the Dean is repressed AF and a part of this is his bisexuality canon text up for interpretation*

This isn’t reaching. This is consistent canon about a man who’s very self diagnosed thing is sublimation, meanwhile... all this.

#dean sublimation winchester #bi!dean #dean is bi #i mean you have to really try to disprove every single time a bi!dean moment comes up #and it totally makes sense for his whole repression arc anyway soooooo its like negating sam's guilt arc or cas' duty arc #it makes no sense to work like a horse to get around it

[amwritingmeta]

13x05 Hopes (and Ramblings)

Evening, gals and pals! I’m just going to throw this in the pot before going to bed and trying to get a few hours sleep before getting up at the crack of dawn to watch this episode. I’m so fucking excited there aren’t even words to describe it!! The sneak peek is GOLDEN!!

Here are my hopes - all of them to be understated af in the narrative, of course, but I would love LOVE to see:

The reason Sam is “being nice”, and trying to get Dean to engage in stuff that has always signalled performing!Dean to us, is tied to Sam’s understanding of Dean

In my mind, Sam’s understanding of Dean is wholly rooted in two perceptions:

1 --> 

performing!Dean is such a part of Dean’s real personality to Sam that Sam doesn’t see these traits as a facade, so every time the facade slips it makes Sam uncomfortable (like enjoying different music than the five records Dean listens to over and over and over again, for example, or being knowledgable about classic works of fiction or knowing nerdy shit) 

It makes Sam uncomfortable because suddenly he doesn’t know if he really knows his brother as a person, which Sam fundamentally doesn’t because there is a lot of personal stuff that Dean has always kept incredibly private

Because Dean hasn’t been able to fully engage with that personal stuff himself, because Dean has suppressed sides to himself his whole life, because those sides of him have been labeled as weaknesses, and he can’t be weak if he’s going to Protect Sammy

2 -->

As much as Sam sees performing!Dean as the true identity of Dean (which of course it isn’t), Sam is also good at reading people, he’s an observer and he’s not stupid, so to my mind there is no question that he knows Dean is bisexual.

I mean, we’ve seen evidence of this on more than one occasion and sorry I’m too tired to list them here, but 4x06 and drunk!Dean flirting with the cute police officer until Sam comes and hauls him away is one of those instances and then there’s the “Are you strictly into dick now” comment and Dean’s REACTION to it, which more or less says that he knows Sam knows.

Dean’s sexuality is NOT A BIG DEAL HERE and I just love that so fucking much because I believe the Big Deal is Dean’s stubborn inability to DEAL WITH HIS FUCKING FEELINGS because it’s been knocked into him that feelings are weaknesses weaknesses weaknesses and losing Cas has made Dean believe that this is the absolute truth and there’s no hope and there’s no happy ending EVER.

(fuck this narrative) (GOD)

So to summarise:

1. Sam sees performing!Dean as the real Dean: classic rock, cool car, BAMF big brother who saves the world and gets the girl (and sometimes boy though they never actually talk about that, of course) (because boys have more often connected to those feelings than girls ever have...) (and Dean doesn’t talk about feelings) (right?) (right)

2. Sam knows Dean is bi

Which is why I believe Sam knows exactly how in love with Cas Dean actually is. It’s not because he knows Dean somehow better than Dean knows himself, it’s because the sexuality stuff has never been a big thing - it’s just part of who Dean is to Sam - so Sam’s watched the attraction Dean has had to Cas, and by S11 Sam started seeing how that attraction was moving into something more.

And yes, I know Sam referred to Cas as “a strong vessel” etc. but Sam also kept a clear head in that season, and saw the Lucifer situation from the opposite spectrum to the emotionally compromised Dean: Cas made a choice. Just as Sam refers to Mary’s choice to go up against Lucifer before falling through the rift - no matter how much he mourns his mother, he won’t blame her actions on Jack.

Anyway, all this is based in my reading of the narrative and I have a feeling 13x05 will either enforce my perception of Sam actually understanding Dean’s grief over the loss of the love of his life, or 13x05 will serve to break this perception apart, and I couldn’t give less of a fuck either way, I’m ecstatic to see where Yockey is taking us with this episode, but if it’s enforced... oh, I can see good things. I know there’ll be good things either way, but oh these good things... 

They might actually use Sam - going on the promo - to push for Dean to engage with the stuff that are his go-to coping mechanisms because, to Sam, this stuff is what usually puts Dean in a “good” mood. Sam trying to connect with Dean through hunting, food, booze, sex is a powerful fucking way to underline how these things will not put Dean in a good mood this time around - either because Dean doesn’t want them/need them or because Dean tries to engage and realises they do nothing for him anymore. Setting it up like this could serve to expose the performance to Sam AND the GA and to continue to push the deconstruction of performing!Dean. (the mind delights) (and personally I prefer the former where Dean doesn’t even see the point in engaging, but if we get the latter idgaf) (just UNDERLINE PLEASE) (aaaahhhhh almost time to watch this episode aaaahhhhh) (ok calming down)

The thought of Sam possibly trying to connect to Dean after Dean gave him that moment of honesty at the end of the last episode, Sam in this episode trying his best to help Dean find closure, help him move on, gives me heart palpitations. I will fucking celebrate with the neighbours if this happens - however understated it may be!! Because this whole episode is about letting go, right? Because who’s coming back this episode? Who’s on the move back to them?? *screaming ghost emoji* 

Also, Sam can relate to what Dean is going through. Sam lost the woman he loved. Sam knows about “no normal after that”. Sam also knows that you learn to live with the grief. I hope, more than anything, that Sam is the key to Dean gaining a sense of acceptance of that fact. 

I would also love (however possibly very unlikely it is we get this now) more of a confrontation in this episode. They’ve both addressed the root of their grief: Dean told Sam why he can’t let go of Cas (more or less) and Sam has told Dean why he can’t let go of Mary, but Sam being supportive might not be enough... I would just... if Sam even so much at hints at Dean being overly controlling, at Dean always blaming himself for everything... if they have a loud or a subtle, quiet confrontation about any of this stuff that Sam knows has shaped so much of their history, of how they relate to each other and how he’s related to Dean ... and Sam more or less gets to confront his own foremost parental figure now that they’re moving out of the brodependency... But it might be too early for this. I’d just love love love it.

Anyway, we might not get ANY of this.

What I am crossing fingers for, though, with most of you, I’m sure, is for that “Hello, Dean” to finish the episode. Come on, give us one more Cas-related cliffhanger. :D Please please please please.

As for Cas? Not a fucking clue what his plot strand will look like. I’m getting heart palpitations from that as well. Good ones! :P I’ve been smiling along with him all week. Every time I’ve had a quiet moment and thought to myself “Cas is ALIVE. And SMILING!” :D

I CANNOT WAIT TO SEE WHAT THEY GIVE US!

Now I must sleep. See you on the other side!!

#very late night ramblings #spn 13x05 hopes

[amorremanet]

Hiya ! Super late but : 5+ headcanon thingy about...voltron college au if you wanna ? :)

aksfkgdfgh, I did mean to get back to this yesterday, but I got distracted writing and watching House reruns (but the, “give me an AU and I give you 5+ headcanons about it” meme is basically always open, because I am always good to go on AU headcanons)

idk whether to go with the college AU side of the fic that’s actually updating on AO3 or the one college AU that has Hunk/Keith/Lance, Matt/Shiro, Allura/Shay, and Lotor being a pain in the ass because Shiro doesn’t want to date him (and for multiple other reasons, but Shiro not wanting to date him is a big one) — so heck, let’s do both

the AU that doesn’t have a fic at present

Shiro has spent two separate Christmases in the hospital for one reason or another. The first one was when he was in high school: he was working out too hard without actually taking care of himself, putting way too much stress on himself about literally everything (from being allowed to play varsity lacrosse as a sophomore to worrying about his PSAT scores to trying to handle Keith’s first crush for him when Keith literally didn’t ask and just wanted to talk to Shiro about it because he was 13 and didn’t think the guy he liked knew he existed), and after seriously exhausting himself and throwing his electrolytes way, waaay off, Shiro passed out.

The second time was during his sophomore year of uni, and Shiro was so certain that he just had a nasty cold but actually, he was down with pneumonia. And as it turns out, stress from finals week, not eating right, and trying to keep to the same gym schedule that you have when you’re healthy? Not the way to handle pneumonia.

That first time is also the reason why Shiro first started visiting his and Keith’s therapist in a capacity other than, “Shiro had to escort Keith to make sure he got to the appointment and Keith asked him to come into the office too (or possibly emotionally manipulated him into it, maybe both)”

There is probably a 95% chance that Pidge will find a stray cat and try to hide it in her dorm room, despite all of the, “no, you may not have pets in your dorm; exceptions can be negotiated about for disabled students but the rest of you are not allowed to have pets, get over it” rules

When Allura finds out, there’s like a 65% chance that she just won’t report anything as part of an awkward attempt to befriend Pidge

When Hunk/Keith/Lance actually sort out the polyamory thing, Keith is going to want to tell Shiro immediately. The only reason they won’t is that Lance doesn’t believe that Keith can successfully tell Shiro about this by using a Parks and Rec meme — but “successfully” here means, “telling Shiro the thing AND getting him to say the line that is a response to said meme.”

So, they go to Shiro’s room and Keith is all, “This is my boyfriend Hunk and this is Hunk’s boyfriend Lance.”

“Sorry… what’s the situation?” Shiro plays along because he knows that sometimes, you just have to let Keith communicate through borrowed words.

“Hunk is bi and he’s into me, and he’s also into Lance, and Lance is really into Hunk, and I don’t actually hate Lance.”

Hunk: “It’s not that complicated :)”

Shiro: “Okay, but seriously, what is the situation”

Keith: “I’ll tell you everything but only if you say the other thing”

Shiro: “*siiiiiiiiiiiiiighs* …The thing about youth culture is: I don’t understand it”

and then Lance, Keith, and Hunk celebrate because haaaa, Shiro said the thing

Lance really doesn’t mean to be an asshole, most of the time. Like, okay, yes, sometimes, he DOES mean to be kind of an asshole — for instance, when The Paladins get beaten at ultimate frisbee Lotor, Acxa, Zethrid, Ezor, Narti, and Lotor’s coterie of overly similar frat-bro bodyguards, and Lance feels like Lotor definitely cheated somehow despite the complete lack of evidence, so he starts cussing Lotor out and accusing him and the gals of cheating

—but most of the time, Lance just doesn’t really know what to do with his feelings. Especially when a lot of them are things like, “All of the pressure he’s putting on himself to succeed and do well because all his older siblings are awesome and he doesn’t know what he’s good at like they’re good at stuff”

and, “All of his little nieces and nephews look up to Cool Uncle Lance and he wants to be a good role model, and he doesn’t want to let them down and doesn’t realize that the tiny humans love him regardless of how he does at school or what a loser he feels like he is and about the only way that he could ever let them down is if he promised them something and then didn’t deliver on it”

and, “Lance knew that it was going to be hard to leave home and go to school, and he thought maybe it’d be easier because he and Hunk were going to the same place so at least he’d have his best friend — but then he had to room with Keith instead of Hunk, and Keith is THE WORST, but Hunk actually kinda likes Keith and Keith sucks at flirting and Lance feels like he has no right to feel jealous because obviously he’s not in love with Hunk or anything don’t be stupid they’re just best friends and Hunk probably wouldn’t want to be with Lance anyway, and oh god why does everything hurt”

—all of which sort of boils over into Lance crying on Shiro’s shoulder when Shiro tries to sit him down in the Cool RA Single for a Talk about how he and Keith’s mutual antagonism has been steadily escalating (and the whole, “let’s sit all three of us down and hash out your differences and make a plan to handle this” idea went over like a lead balloon because Keith and Lance were both on the defensive, so nothing got discussed in a constructive fashion)

Granted, Lance was on the defensive during the one-on-one chat too, but mostly because he assumed that Shiro was going to take Keith’s side in this by default because they have history together and apparently Hunk is going out with Keith on Friday night so why wouldn’t Shiro take Keith’s side, too

This boiling over of emotion ends with Shiro feeling like he is in way over his head about trying to get Keith and Lance to just…… not even, “get them to be friends,” but, “get them to please stop it with deliberately antagonizing each other, for the love of god, please”

—but also with him going, “Okay, I’m not saying that you need to go to therapy or talk to me about your problems or anything? But if you want to talk to someone, there’s no shame in doing that and it can help a lot, if you let it”

—which in turn results in Lance hugging him tighter and crying a bit more (at least in the short term)

I mean, look, things will get better after this but Lancey-Lance has a LOT of pent-up emotions and Shiro gives nice hugs and says that he doesn’t care about people crying up his shirts, so. We’ll get to an okay place, but Lance has to cry it out first.

Shiro is the only person who doesn’t think the, “world’s okayest dad” mug that Lance and Hunk got him for Christmas is hilarious. He is NOT anybody’s father. Big brother figure — okay, sure, he can deal with that, but he isn’t anybody’s dad, will you please stop calling him that, saying things like, “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed” doesn’t make him any shade of paternal okay.

I mean, he drinks out of the mug anyway because coffee is coffee and as long as the coffee gets into his mouth safely, Shiro doesn’t mind what its container looks like. But still. He’s not your dad.

Everyone else still thinks the mug is hilarious, though (well, okay, Keith thought it was funny for a little bit and has since gotten over it, and Pidge only thought that it was mildly amusing and now she wishes that everyone would just shut up about it).

But yes, they get that Shiro isn’t literally anybody’s dad and that strictly speaking, he is more of an older brother figure than a dad — it’s just that nobody makes, “world’s okayest brother” mugs as far as they know, and Shiro still does things like the whole, “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed” thing until he tries to put conscious effort into NOT doing them (and even then, he still does them)

So, if you ask anyone but Shiro (and Keith and Pidge), that mug is hilarious

the tall, smart, good-looking AU

Shay organized an anti-M//ilo Y//iannopoulous protest back in February because Dean Zarkon was going to let that fucker come to campus and speak. It didn’t turn into full-scale riots like the protests out at UC Berkeley, but there was nevertheless resistance from the student conservative groups, and although the “presentation” was sparsely attended, it also wasn’t canceled like Shay was hoping to get.

Keith thinks that this is a perfectly interesting story about things that actually matter and doesn’t get why the other people in his creative nonfiction class with Dr. Ryner think he should skip writing In Cold Blood!Capote-inspired reportage about the protested and instead write a fucking BuzzFeed Lives piece about how he had this one abusive douchebag foster grandfather who got bitten by a Texas coral snake and died and it was the best day ever

Kolivan is head of the history department. He’s married to Antok, who is also a history professor, and they have a dog called Rufus. They’ve been calling their relationship status, “married” since 1997 (and they’ve been legally married since 2004, when they took advantage of the ruling in Goodridge v. Department of Public Health to make if official). Here is essentially how their proposal went:

Antok: “The only reason you’re trying to pull away is because you’re too scared to marry me!”

Kolivan: “I am absolutely not scared of anything, I LOVE you! If you truly meant the proposal, then you would stand behind your alleged convictions, so I can only conclude that YOU are too scared to let yourself marry ME and are projecting your insecurities because—”

Antok: “WHY WOULD I PROPOSE AT ALL IF I DIDN’T MEAN IT”

Kolivan: “I DON’T KNOW EVERYTHING DO I LOOK PSYCHIC TO YOU”

Antok: “WHAT DOES A PSYCHIC EVEN LOOK LIKE”

Kolivan: “YOU SAID YOU’D GIVE ME TIME TO THINK IT OVER”

Antok: “YEAH. I AGREED TO A WEEK. YOU’VE HAD THREE. JUST ADMIT IT, YOU ARE TOO DAMN SCARED TO MARRY ME”

Kolivan: “I AM NOT SCARED, I’LL MARRY THE SHIT OUT OF YOU RIGHT NOW”

Antok: “OH YEAH? PROVE IT”

Kolivan: “FINE I WILL *fumbles about trying to put on Antok’s engagement ring and refuses help until he finally gets it right by himself* …There! ……Uh, do you know any jewelers that are open right now or would a Ring-Pop from the bodega on the corner be an acceptable stand-in until morning”

—at least they didn’t have to do that again in 2004. Antok just got home really late on the day the ruling was announced (because he’d had an unexpected hospital visit and had hung around to see if his sister would need him and Kolivan to watch her kids for the night) — which she didn’t, in the end, but it still took a while to decide that it was all okay and he called to say that he’d be late but couldn’t keep up as much as he wanted because cellphones circa 2004……

So, when Antok got home, he found Kolivan asleep on the kitchen table, surrounded by a dinner that had gotten cold, a cake he’d made himself, balloons that seemed totally out-of-place in proximity to Kolivan, one of Antok’s scented candles (which had burned down enough that it was like five minutes from setting off their smoke alarm), and a Ring-Pop because he thought it would be a fun callback to their original proposal

(I mean, Kolivan also had another ring to give his husband and had successfully kept it under-wraps for three weeks because he usually doesn’t let himself hope so much — he would tell you that he always hopes for the best but experience, unfortunately, tells him to expect the worst [and if you get that this is a reference to Deep Space 9, you are Kolivan’s friend now] — but he was incredibly, unusually hopeful about how the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court would ultimately rule in Goodridge v. Department of Public Health)

Anyway, this was all so sweet that Antok just…… didn’t wake his husband up until after he’d gotten his camera and taken a picture for posterity’s sake

—and yet, they still periodically have incidents like, “Antok comes and interrupts Kolivan’s class for, ‘serious department business’ that is actually more like, ‘personal issues that are significant but could have waited until after class’ and Kolivan proceeds to spend seven minutes telling his students about why intra-Departmental romances are a bad idea”

or, “Kolivan forgets his own birthday again and, the next day, Antok starts off his class by calling some historical figure an idiot and yeah okay, maybe it sounds like he’s just picking on Napoleon in order to break down the whole, ‘Seeing these historical personages as Huge Important People, rather than as actual human beings, which in turn makes your scholarship less reliable’ thing… but then he gets to the part like, ‘I mean, if you think about it, Joséphine de Beauharnais probably only had her alleged affairs, if she did indeed have them, because Napoleon was a buffoon who was too absorbed in his work to remember his own birthday after she worked so hard to make it nice for him’ and everybody is just like, ‘oh jeez Kolivan really screwed up this time, didn’t he’“

But their dramatics aside, they eventually calm down, talk, and work it out every time because okay yes, they’re both disasters when you get to know them, but they’re disasters who love each other and care about this relationship

(Still, it is generally agreed that Thace probably made the best call by marrying a therapist who is affiliated with the college literally only because Ulaz is married to Thace, and because he sometimes gets clients referred to him by the mental health folks at student health services)

You know that old Arrested Development bit that goes, “Get me a vodka rocks.” / “Mother, it’s breakfast.” / “*sighs, rolls eyes* Fine, and a piece of toast” — yeah, no, Lotor and Honerva have done that exact bit before

One time when they were in undergrad, Ezor and Zethrid tried to make Lotor watch Arrested Development with them because they thought he’d probably find it funny and it might be like a therapeutic outlet for him. They ignored Acxa’s multiple warnings about how this was a terrible idea and it wasn’t going to work……

When Lotor made it through exactly four episodes before kinda breaking down and demanding to know what was so hilarious about a bunch of horrible, self-absorbed people screwing each other over and treating each other like garbage, these parents don’t even see their children as human beings how is this FUNNY, what the fuck is WRONG with the people who made this show, why does everyone love it so much, THIS IS HORRIBLE WHY ARE YOU EVEN MAKING HIM WATCH IT?

……Yeah, it was all Acxa could do not to tell them, “I told you so”

Mostly she didn’t because having known Lotor the longest means that she’s usually the one who has the easiest time of getting through to him in a constructive, helpful fashion when he’s being an even worse mess than usual, or having some kind of meltdown, or similar

Trying to discuss any of the show’s redeeming qualities with Lotor still will not end well. Because…… no, seriously. The Bluth-Fünkes and their misadventures hit waaaay too close to home for him, and remind him of Zarkon and Honerva most obviously (but also of all the extended family members who he pretty openly hates), and just

Don’t go there

Please for the love of God, I’m begging you: do not go there with Lotor, it’s a terrible idea for everyone

If you want to do any dysfunctional family comedies with him, your choices are Little Miss Sunshine and, “absolutely nothing, that is the only option, you can have Little Miss Sunshine or you can pick a genre other than dysfunctional family comedies”

Keith is going to be slightly confused when he gets to the Battle of the Bands on November 3rd and sees Acxa there. Because they have met before, while they were trying to switch between hiding and fighting back against some of the Conservative student groups that were antagonizing at Shay’s protest, and Keith hasn’t seen her around since then. Mostly, he hasn’t seen Acxa because she isn’t actually a student or in any way tied to the college; she just showed up for the protest because she agreed with Shay about not wanting that fuckhead anywhere near her city

Keith is not going to be confused by Zethrid, when he meets her, but basically everyone else is going to be confused by the fact that the two of them actually get along, because both of them have bad tempers and neither of them is really known for having stellar social skills

They’re going to talk to each other because Zethrid is all, “So how do you know my girlfriend and why did you two just have a sort of awkward moment of recognition” so Keith tells her, and aside from both of them thinking it was totally awesome how Acxa threw a brick at some skinhead and didn’t get caught, Keith is all, “*shrugs* You don’t have to apologize for assuming anything and getting defensive or whatever, I totally get wanting to protect the people you love and being willing to beat the shit out of someone to do it”

Zethrid: “*eyebrow arches because…… uh huh, Keith, you are 5’9” and you certainly look skinny even if you’re pretty strong, so you’ll excuse Zethrid for being skeptical* When have you ever beaten the shit out of anybody in your life, little man”

Keith: “……Do you want a romantically relevant example or my favorite example”

Zethrid: “………idk, let’s say both”

Keith: “Okay, well, the romantically relevant example was this one time in Chicago? Shiro, his old roommate, and I went out to a bar, and when we were all leaving, there were some skinheads going at these other guys. So, Shiro’s pretty drunk at the time and has even less impulse control than I did, and he runs right in to play big damn heroes, which ends up with him getting stabbed. Next thing I know, I’m pouncing this skinhead who’s like about Shiro’s height but built bigger than you, pummeling him because he stabbed Shiro. Apparently, I actually did some good damage before he shook me off, but I was kinda drunk too and got a concussion out of it, and my memory of it is a little fuzzy”

Zethrid: “Okay what about your favorite example”

Keith: “I had this foster one brother who liked to do shit like locking me in the cupboard under the stairs or locking me out of the house for several days so he could fuck his girlfriend. At the time, I also had a crush on this girl I went to school with. I mean, we were like 13 and neither of us had very many friends, so it’s not like we dated or anything, but she had a shitty home-life too and we got along. Anyway, I had her over one afternoon so we could work on a thing for our science class, and Bryce started being an asshole, so I kicked him in the nuts so hard that we had to go to the ER and get them pulled back out.”

Zethrid: “NICE. ……I like you. :)”

Keith: “……thank you? ……I think I like you, too.”

Lotor, probably: “Zethrid, nooooo, don’t like the street rat, please, I beg of you, it’s bad enough that Shiro likes him and Acxa thinks he’s okay, NOT YOU TOO ZETHRID, ZETHRID WHYYYYY”

Shiro and Acxa: “*facepalming forever because: 1. they know that they should encourage their Keith and Zethrid in making friends because they both do that so rarely, but… 2. for fuck’s sakes, why are you two bonding over a shared appreciation for violence, like? sdkffkhr, Shiro and Acxa are not outright OPPOSED to violence but can you two please find something else to bond over… and 3. ugh someone really has to go deal with Lotor before he has a full-blown temper tantrum and neither Shiro nor Acxa wants to be that person tonight, they really, really don’t*”

Coran does more active work with the students as the Assistant Dean of Student Life than Zarkon does as the full Dean of Student Life, but it’s an open secret that Zarkon doesn’t want this job — he’d rather just be the President of the University, but in lieu of that, Dean of Faculty is his ideal position — and that he makes Coran deal with more shit while inventing a bunch of bureaucratic reasons why he can’t do it himself.

Strictly speaking, Zarkon could probably get away with a lot more than he already does if he said something about his Chemistry professor wife being a high-functioning alcoholic while their son is sort of perpetually up at the edge of a meltdown cliff, but that would require him to:

1. acknowledge that Honerva has an actual problem instead of trusting that she totally has it under control because she’s a genius and he’s suspending good judgment because he loves her;

2. take Lotor’s problems seriously instead of dismissing him as a little more than a spoiled brat and an overly entitled pain in Zarkon’s ass;

and 3. care about his family’s actual health and overall well-being more than he cares about what the neighbors think and what the other people on campus think and, in general, about what kind of image his family projects to everybody else

—which means that this is basically never going to happen, since even if one of those things came to pass, the other two almost definitely wouldn’t unless Honerva was like, actually dying right here, right now, and Zarkon could not possibly find a way to escape dealing with the consequences of his bullshit choices and how much familial dysfunction that he’s allowed to fester by not taking any of it seriously, thinking that everyone could handle it fine, etc.

After a mix-up with his scholarships and grants that resulted in him losing his student housing, Keith did a lot of sleeping on campus couches while showering at the campus gym and he somehow managed to convince most everyone that he was totally fine…… until he relied on his old trick of sleeping in people’s cars, broke into Alfor’s, and got caught by Allura (who was his girlfriend at the time) and her fancy diplomat father.

The retort, “I mean, you should be glad to see me, I broke in while sleep-deprived and strung out on potentially heart attack-inducing amounts of coffee, so you clearly need a better security system on your Benz” did not go over well

Like, Alfor appreciated Keith’s attempt at humor, and the point about needing to get the security system checked on his car, and Keith’s sense of self-reliance…… but on the other hand, Allura’s boyfriend was all but passed out in Alfor’s backseat and tried to leave when Alfor offered him one of the guest rooms at their place uptown, so

That was kinda worrisome, yeah

Also not really the best way to meet your girlfriend’s father for the first time

Whoops

#machidielontheway #mine: headcanons #mine: voltron #vld headcanons #takashi shirogane #keith kogane #pidge holt #princess allura #hunk x keith x lance #vld lance #hunk garrett #vld shay #vld zethrid #vld acxa #otf: stay with me #otf: on wednesdays we destroy voltron #prince lotor #vld kolivan #vld antok #antok x kolivan #coran alfor zarkon and honerva are also here #but i ran out of tags #memes for ts #voltron legendary defender #for the sake of blacklists but ugh i will need to rb this later so i can tag it in full #alcohol ref// mental health issues ref// substance abuse ref// #keith x shiro #otp: desperately wants to see you

[violet--minds-blog]

Why Bisexual Rep Is Important

Piper Gibson | March 17, 2017 (Note: This was written on September 23, 2016, so anything that has occurred in the shows mentioned in terms of representation may be missing. If so please let me know and I’ll correct it!) In honor of Bisexual Visibility Day, I wrote a little something. And if you’re curious why this day is named for visibility, not celebration or appreciation, then just read on.

So, it’s not that I didn’t know gay people existed when I was a kid.

I knew. I grew up watching Friends, after all; Ross’s ex-wife Carol and her partner Susan were lesbians. I watched Ellen with my grandma. When Glee first aired I was in eighth grade. I knew that there were people out there that were gay, and we had family friends that are gay that I’d met once or twice. But I had no fucking clue about anything else, and I definitely didn’t know what the hell “bisexual” meant until I was in my teens.

I don’t have a specific memory of learning about the word, but there was certainly a few years of a gap between gaining the knowledge and applying it to myself. I figured it out somewhere around junior year of high school, and came out to my parents in the winter of my senior year. All that time I’d liked girls and hadn’t accepted it, hadn’t let myself feel it. The first time I was suicidal l was twelve, and it was because I had a crush on a girl and didn’t know what to do or how to feel about it.

This is why bisexual representation matters. Because even though I’d seen representations for lesbians and gay men as a kid, I’d never seen me on television. I’d never even heard the word bisexual as an identifying word on tv or in the movies before. (I still haven’t.) Sure, I’d heard the word-- like in Glee, when Blaine is questioning his sexuality and says he might be bisexual, and Kurt, a gay man, replies angrily, “Bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they wanna hold hands with girls and feel like a normal person for a change.” That was the first time I heard the word bisexual on television, is still the only example I can remember, and that’s the message I got about who I was. I was fake. I was a lie. In fact, the word wasn’t even applicable to me-- I wasn’t a gay guy, I was a girl and I was confused and looking for validation. And the media spit in my face.

As far as representation goes, bisexual people have it pretty rough. There is a theme in media, a very dangerous theme, that implicitly shows characters are bisexual and explicitly tells the audience they’re straight. I have example after example of this, files of queerbaiting I’ve stowed in my head for years.

Dean Winchester from Supernatural holds all of his long-standing emotional relationships with men, bonds best with men, is shown to be attracted to men, and only sleeps with/dates women. He is a “womanizer” and his relationships with women never last, whereas he works at his relationships with the men in his life. He cares deeply for them and sacrifices everything for them, but he’s not bi. He’s straight, he sleeps with women, see?

Steve Rogers, AKA Captain America, has healthy, strong, intense relationships with men and women. He’s “not good with girls,” but he’s good with his absolute best friend Bucky, who he’s known since childhood and holds above all else. He falls in love with Peggy Carter, yes, and their brief relationship is important and real, but he also drops everything and flies into enemy lines to rescue Bucky. He becomes a completely different person from grief when he believes Bucky to be dead. When Bucky comes back as a brainwashed soldier and doesn’t know Steve, Steve won’t fight him, and is prepared to die rather than hurt this man who doesn’t even remember him. He drops the shield and stops being Captain America because the alternative is losing Bucky. The writers and actors and media all call Bucky and Steve’s arc a “love story,” but insist that they’re both straight. Peggy happened, right? Bucky slept with loads of women, right?

One of the biggest examples of queerbaiting, BBC’s Sherlock, shows John Watson have relationships with women but above all put Sherlock first, caring for him and supporting him and loving him like he would a boyfriend. He’s Sherlock’s only friend and confidant and they live together and share their whole lives together, but somehow this doesn’t matter because he has relationships with women. There’s even a scene where he yells that he’s not gay, which I remember watching and thinking, “you don’t have to be gay to like the same gender.” But he marries a girl, right? He’s not gay, so what does it matter?

I have so many more examples. Jessica Jones (from the Marvel show of the same name) and her best friend Trish act like ex-girlfriends, are treated by the show as ex-girlfriends, and the first season ends with Jessica saying something she never does-- “I love you”-- to Trish and embracing her. This by all accounts looks like them getting back together, but they both have male romantic interests, so none of that matters. Merlin and Arthur from Merlin have an epic love story and sacrifice life and limb for each other, but they both get girlfriends and eventually, wives. Harry Potter is very into both Draco Malfoy and Cedric Diggory throughout the books but dates only women and marries Ginny in the end. Even in How to Get Away With Murder, where Annalise Keating has explicit relationships with women and men and is very clearly bisexual, they still haven’t said the word out loud. It’s a very scary word, apparently.

Something dangerous happens when media implicitly grants a community representation but doesn’t give them explicitly stated, canon representation. We are told we are shameful. We are told we are bad and dirty and must be kept secret. And when we have the gall to point out how obvious it is for us that these characters are bisexual like we are-- because those in the LGBTQ+ community are taught to read subtext and interpret media for ourselves from a young age-- the general public laughs in our faces. They call us “crazy fans” (which, okay, is super dismissing and dehumanizing and ableist) and tell us that actually, we’re fetishizing these characters, and we need to stop.

It’s different for queer people. There is no explicit bisexual representation. But when I see Jessica Jones look at her best friend the same way I looked at female friends of mine when I was twelve? When I see Merlin and Arthur look into each other’s eyes and smile the same way me and my girlfriend do? It feels the same. It’s just not straight. And the writers of these characters know it. They know it and they use it, because we’re starving for validation and we’ll take anything. They write these scenes, these loving glances, purposely, then turn around and tell us our beloved characters are straight. Why would they not be? They have girlfriends and boyfriends, after all. Nevermind what that says to bisexual men who lean towards dating women and feel weird and shameful about their attraction to men, who watch Supernatural and wonder why they relate so much to Dean. Nevermind what that says to bisexual women who watch women on screen be physically affectionate and loving towards each other and who are told that this is strictly platonic; female friends are all like this, and it’s definitely not romantic.

Television does not seem to understand the possibility of being attracted to more than one gender. For me, someone who’s loved every gender since I can remember, it seems strange to only like one gender. I love boys and I love girls and I love everyone in between, and this isn’t taken away by me currently dating a girl. I wasn’t straight when I dated a boy in high school, and I’m not a lesbian now. But in television, you’re a straight woman if you date men. You’re a straight man if you date women. Nothing else matters, especially not your long-standing, emotional, loving relationships with the same gender.

There is a problem in the media with being afraid of this word. I’d like to know why that is. More and more shows are including gay characters now, giving them girlfriends and boyfriends and plotlines and interesting stories. (We won’t touch on the “bury your gays” trope here.) But there’s still so, so, so little explicitly defined bisexual characters. If they’re bi, this is shown, not told. We learn they’re bi from them kissing boys and girls, not by them mentioning it. This is a clear distinction, and it’s important to note. I can’t think of a single example of something I’ve watched or read where a character said themselves that they were bisexual. Self-identifying, strongly and confidently, is important. Not being outed, not just showing their identity by making out with multiple genders, and not saying a stupid cop-out like “well, sexuality is fluid” or “I’m not straight or gay, I’m just… y’know.”

No. Young bisexuals don’t know. Young me didn’t know. If I had been watching TV and heard someone call themselves bisexual, proud and clear, I’d have sat up. I’d have listened. I wouldn’t have had to watch show after show, movie after movie, read book after book and gone to my other queer friends, saying with raised eyebrows, “This is fucking gay, right? I’m not the only one?”

We see your implicit representation and we want better. We deserve better. We demand better, for us and for young bisexuals, their stomachs sinking every time they watch TV and a joke is made about two characters of the same gender being “too close.” My stomach sank when I was a kid and I watched Joey and Chandler hug and say “We do this too much, don’t we?” and break apart.

I didn’t know why then, but I do now. And I-- we-- deserve better.

And to not end this on a sad note, I do have hope. I am tired of queerbaiting and biphobia, but I have hope. When I was a kid I had nothing-- at the very least now, I have characters on TV who kiss people of multiple genders. Eventually they’ll be allowed to say that they’re bisexual out loud, but for now I have confirmation from show runners that I was right, that they are bi. For now I have amazing bisexual Youtubers like Dodie Clark and Chris Kendall and Alayna Fender. For now I have Korra from Legend of Korra and Jack Zimmermann from Check, Please! (READ IT HERE) and Annalise Keating from How to Get Away With Murder. For now I hold the little rep I have close to my heart and wait for a better time, a time when “bisexual” is not a scary word to say on television or in movies. After all, we have all these angry bisexuals with no representation and a fierce desire to see themselves in media. That’s just a recipe for shit to get done.

#blog #piper gibson #text #article #essay

[katymacsupernatural]

The Proposal  Chapter 4

Jensen Ackles x Reader

Story Summary: Jensen needs help keeping his life in order. To keep the media off his back. In order to do so, he comes up with a plan. Y/N, just a producer’s assistant, is pulled in to play a part she never thought she would have. Jensen’s fiancee. Only will it stay as a part to play, or will she start to want more?

Catch Up Here: Masterpost

He barely glanced up at you, offering you a hint of the famous smile that drove women crazy before dropping his gaze back down to his phone. Reminding you of what this was. Strictly business. You were a means to an end for him, and the money they were paying you would definitely help your plans.

With a deep breath, you sat down across from him, smoothing the silky material of your dress. He placed his phone beside his plate, glancing you up and down. “You look pretty,” he spoke up just as a waiter came with a bottle of wine. Jensen nodded, and both of your glasses were instantly filled before the man left you alone once again.

You peered around the room. The place was packed, everyone dressed in their nicer clothes. A couple of women kept glancing over at Jensen, and you didn’t blame them. He was stunning, and he didn’t even have to work at it. He just seemed comfortable in his own skin, something that you had always wished for yourself. 

“Thank you,” you finally answered, picking up the heavy, leather-bound menu. “I’ve never eaten here before.”

“It’s one of my...traditions I guess you could call it,” he chuckled. “It used to be Jared and I would head to the nearest bar after work on Fridays. But he flies right home to his family, while I spend about half of my weekends up here.”

“And the other half?” You asked while trying to figure out what you were going to eat for dinner. Everything sounded amazing.

He shrugged. “I still head home to Texas. I have the brewery to take care of down there, and my families down there.” He sat the menu off to the side. “And might I suggest the tuna? It’s my favorite thing here.”

“The tuna sounds delicious,” you agreed. “And a brewery? That sounds like fun.” 

Jensen gave the waiter your order. “It was. At the beginning. Coming up with new beverages, and the whole design. Started it with my best friend. But then he died, and I don’t know...I just,”

“I get it,” you smiled at him, grateful that this wasn’t as awkward yet as you had imagined it might have been. “But keeping the brewery going, what a wonderful memory to your friend.”

“It is, isn’t it?” He seemed shocked that he hadn’t thought of it himself. “I’m actually planning on going down there tomorrow, and that’s one of the reason’s I wanted to have this meeting.”

You nodded as the waiter carefully placed your food in front of you. It looked amazing. “I figured there would be some ground rules,” you mumbled before taking a bite of the flaky tuna. “Oh, this is good.”

His eyes twinkled as he watched you enjoy the meal. “I knew you would enjoy it. Now, on to the ground rules.”

“Of course.”

He pulled a slip of paper from his pocket. “Here’s some information that you will need to know. It felt weird writing them down, but if you’re going to be my fiancee, they are things you should know.”

You quickly glanced over them. His favorite food, color, what he was allergic to. His parent’s name, things like that. Tucking it in your purse, you turned your attention back to the conversation. “Of course. I’ll read through it later.”

“Thank you,” he seemed slightly relieved. “It feels so stupid doing this, but it’s what the studio wanted, and it seemed like the best bet at the time.”

“I understand,” you assured him. “Sometimes we make crazy choices just to make our lives better. Or easier.”

He reached for his wine glass, downing what was left in one shot. “Thanks. And that’s why I wanted to clear the air. To set some guidelines.”

“I will do my best to follow them,” you answered.

“Good,” he took a deep breath. “First, we both need to remember this is strictly business. I know I said earlier that I was attracted to you. And while that will help our facade, I don’t want you to get your hopes up.”

You knew that it was going to be strictly business, but hearing it from his lips still stung. “Got it.”

“Second, we need to come up with a cover story. Everyone will know that we work together. But we need some more information for this to work. And then, I was hoping, after all of this you would head down to Texas with me. Tomorrow. I know it’s short notice, but I want to get this rolling.”

You almost choked on a bite of perfectly steamed rice. “Tomorrow?”

He nodded. “I’ll understand if you can’t. But tomorrow we’re supposed to have a family get together at the brewery. I thought it would be the perfect time to propose.”

Propose? Through all of this, you had never considered the fact that Jensen would actually have to propose to you. In the back of your mind, you had thought maybe it would just happen. That they would mention it in the entertainment news or drop it on social media. “You really want to do that?” You blurted. 

Your shock seemed to lighten the mood. He chuckled, shaking his head. “Not really. But I know my family. And if it isn’t done in person, with witnesses, then they won’t let me live it down.”

Sure, you had agreed to all of this, but you thought that you would have a couple of days to adjust. To plan, and get ready for the onslaught of media and attention turned your way. But now, you would be heading to Texas in the morning, and getting proposed to be evening. It all seemed a little too much.

Realizing that you were trying to wrap your mind around everything, Jensen leaned forward, taking your hand in his. “Listen, I’ll be by your side every step of the way. You’re not in this alone. I’d tell you to pretend it was all just an act, but you’re a PA, not an actress. Just promise me, you’ll talk to me. I don’t want any secrets between us while this is going on. Otherwise, I don’t think it will work.”

Read Chapter 5

Dean/Jensen Tags: @acortez82​​ @acreativelydifferentlove​​ @adoptdontshoppets​​ @a-girl-who-loves-disney​​ @akshi8278​​   @bi-danvers0​​  @cap-just-said-language​​ @colette2537​​   @deansgirl215​​  @flamencodiva​​ @hamiltrash1411​​ @its-not-a-tulpa​​ @jerkbitchidjitassbutt​​ @justanotherwinchester​​ @just-another-winchester​​ @karouwinchester​​ @keikoraventeller​​  @krys198478​​ @librarygeekery​​ @magssteenkamp​​ @misspygmypie​​ @mlovesstories​​ @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk​​  @mrspeacem1nusone​​ @nothinbuttrouble2​​ @ria132love​​ @ruprecht0420​​  @screechingartisancashbailiff​   @sortaathief​​ @superseejay721517​​ @squirrelnotsam​​ @team-free-will-you-idjiot​​ @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​​ @torn-and-frayed​​ @tricksterdean​​ @wonderfulworldofwinchester​​ @woodworthti666​​

The Proposal Tags: @supraveng​ @vicmc624​ @lottieellz101 @impala-dreamer​ @maddiepants​ @emilyshurley​ @tonystark-makes-me-cry​ @starryeyeseunbyul​  @rach-12​ @spnfamily-j2​ @ima-be-a-mongoose​ @flamencodiva​ @compresshischest09​

Forever Tags: @aditimukul​​ @alexwinchester23​​ @algud​​ @amanda-teaches​​ @andreaaalove​​   @artisticpoet​​ @atc74​​ @be-amaziing​​ @camelotandastronauts​​ @caswinchester2000​​ @cpag7​​ @chelsea072498​​  @closetspngirl​​ @deanwanddamons​​ @docharleythegeekqueen​​ @emoryhemsworth​​ @ericaprice2008​​  @esoltis280​​   @foxyjwls007​​ @gh0stgurl​​ @goldenolaf25​​ @growningupgeek​​  @heartislubbingdubbing​​ @heyitscam99​​ @hobby27​​ @horsegirly99​​ @imsuperawkward​​ @internationalmusicteacher​​ @iwriteaboutdean​​  @jayankles​​ @jensen-gal​​ @justsomedreaming​​ @just-another-busyfangirl @karlee-fay-my-wayward-son​​ @linki-locks11​​ @littleblue5mcdork​​  @lowlyapprentice​​   @mersuperwholocked-lowlife​​ @mogaruke​​ @monkeymcpoopoo​​ @musiclovinchic93​​  @nanie5​​   @percussiongirl2017​​ @plaid-lover-bay25​​   @roonyxx​​ @ronja-uebrick​​ @roxyspearing​​  @samanddeanmyheroes​​ @sandlee44​​ @shamelesslydean​​ @simonsbluee​ @sillesworldofwriting​​ @sgarrett49​​ @spnbaby-67​​ @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester​​ @spnwoman​​   @superbadassnatural​​ @thatcrazybookwormgeek​​   @thewinchesterchronicles​​ @vvinch3st3r​​  @whimsicalrobots​​ @winchester-writes​​ @zombiewerewolfqueen​​

#the proposal #jensen ackles x reader #supernatural x reader #supernatural reader insert #katy writes #spn fanfic #supernatural rpf #jensen x reader #jensen x y/n

[tinkdw]

But how do we know for sure it was m/m in Baby? It could’ve been a woman just saying

Sure! Def could have been pegged why not. Could have just had a little bum fun. Totally.

My real question is why are some people SO KEEN to write off all the tons of different moments over 13 years that all point towards one thing and say nah it totally could have been something else.

Seriously. If there are a shit ton of hints that, say, despite what he says, Dean totally enjoys a ton of stuff he says he doesn’t, eg Dr Sexy, larping, dressing up, being a cowboy, riding Larry, teenie tiny flavoured coffees, reading Game of Thrones, Vonnegut, watching Disney movies, Magic Mike etc etc etc… we don’t say ah but there is an alternative option for ALL THESE THINGS that means he ISN’T ACTUALLY into those things!

Take a long hard look at why you’re so desperate for it NOT to be this. Given as I say, this is a consistent theme, there are REPEATED hints of his being into dudes. REPEATEDLY. SINCE SEASON 1. 

Some aren’t even HINTS they’re full on “I know how much you can fit in your ass” “shut up Crowley”

“are you strictly into Dick now?” - Sam’s smirk and Dean all “shut up Sam”.

“what’s bi is bi” - seriously, this is oral not written, we are supposed to hear “BI”

Rowena says this line right after he pretends he has no idea what fifth base is and it’s a blatant lie. The insanely long pause. The deep voiced slow, careful denial while his left eye twitches like mad. The swallow of acknowledgement and awkwardness. Then immediately looks at Sam like SHIT. Sam and Rowena are the embodiment of the *Sure, Jan* gif.

JENSEN’S MICROEXPRESSIONS ARE A GIFT. They’re not even micro here, they’re massively obvious. We are supposed to notice. Sam and Rowena sure do.

At this point it really is reaching trying to say the story is not telling us he’s bisexual and repressing it. 

I wish people would stop trying to justify something that, if it was anything other than his sexuality, they’d see as a clear narrative point. Just let it happen and stop trying to find excuses for 357 different times it’s blatantly exposed in the subtext as part of his character. It is happening.

. .

#bi!dean #dean is bi #seriously stop trying to justify 464 examples of something and writing them off as something else #you wouldnt do that if it wasnt his sexuality #jesus #meta writing #Anonymous