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nopefun · 3 years

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Interview #494: Ryan Frigillana

Ryan Frigillana is a Philippine-born lens-based artist living and working in New York. His work focuses on the fluidity of memory, intimacy, family identity, and visual culture, largely filtered through the lens of race and immigration. Embracing its plasticity, Frigillana explores photography’s relationship to context as a catalyst for thematic dialogue.

His first monograph, Visions of Eden, was published as two editions in 2020, and is held in the library collections of the MoMA, Getty Research Institute, and Smithsonian among others.

We spoke to find out more about Visions of Eden, his love for photobooks, and photography as a medium for introspection.

Lee Chang Ming Ryan Frigillana

Thanks for agreeing to do this! As we’ve just arrived into the new year, I want to start by asking: how did you arrive at photography and how has your practice evolved so far? Your earlier work was anything from still life to street photography, but your recent work seems to deal with more personal themes.

It’s my pleasure; thank you for having this conversation with me! Wow, looking back at how I’ve arrived at this point makes me feel so grateful for this medium, and excited to think of where it will lead me from here. I came to photography somewhat late. I was initially studying to become a nurse and was set to start a career in that field, but I found myself unhappy with where I was going. My mother was a nurse and I know what goes into being one; it’s not an easy job, and I respect those who do it, but my heart wasn’t in it. I found photography as a creative outlet during that stage of my life, and I’ve clung onto it ever since.

My first exposure to photography (no pun intended) came in the form of street and photojournalism. I would borrow books from the library a lot, consuming works by Magnum and other photographers working in that tradition. At the time, it was all I knew so that’s what I tried to emulate. Even early on in my undergrad career, these modes of creation were reinforced by curriculum and by what I saw from my own peers. My still-life work branches off of that same sentiment: the only names that were ever thrown around by professors were Penn and Mapplethorpe, so that’s who I studied. Thankfully over the years, I’ve been able to broaden that perspective through my own research. Though I don’t necessarily pursue street or constructed still-lifes anymore for my personal work, I’d like to think my technical skills (in regard to timing, composition, light) owe a debt to those past experiences.

I suppose now I’m starting to explore how photography can be used as language, to communicate ideas and internal conflicts. I’m thinking more about the power of imagery, its authorship, its implications, and how photographs have shaped, and continue to shape, our reality. That’s where my work is headed at the moment.

I liked how you mentioned photography as a language, which calls into question who we are speaking to when we make images and what kind of narrative we construct by putting photographs together.

In your work “Visions of Eden”, you trace your family’s journey as first-generation Filipino immigrants in America. I was quite struck by how you managed to link together original photography, archived materials and video stills. To me, with the original photography there was a sense of calm and clarity, perhaps in the composition. But with the archived material it was like peering through tinted glass, and the video stills felt like an unsteady memory. What was the editing process like for you and how did you decide what to include or exclude?

For me, editing is the hardest part about photography. Shooting is the enjoyable part of course because it can feel so cathartic. Sometimes when I shoot it feels almost like muscle memory in the sense that you see the world and you just react to it in a trained way. But with editing, it’s more of a cerebral exercise. More thought is involved when you have to deal with visual relationships, sequence, rhythm, and spacing, etc. The real creation of my work takes place in the editing process. That’s where the ingredients come together to form an identity.

When creating this identity, I not only have to think about what I want to say, but also how I want to say it. It’s like speaking; there are numerous ways you can communicate a single sentence. How are images placed in relation to one another? How large are they printed, or how much white space surrounds it? Are the images repeated? What’s on the following page? The preceding page? Is there text? How are they positioned on the spread? All of these little choices impact the tone of your work. And that’s not even mentioning tactile factors like paper stock or cover material. I think that’s why I have such a deep love for photobooks because 1) they’re physical objects and 2) someone has obsessed over every aspect of that object.

I’m aware that my photographs lately have a quiet, detached, somewhat stripped-down quality to them. I think that’s just a subconscious rejection of my earlier days shooting a lot of street where I was constantly seeking crowded frames and complexity in my compositions. As I’ve grown older, I realize less is more and if I can do more by saying less, that’s even better. Now, the complexity I seek lies in the work as a whole and how all these little parts can form something fluid and layered, and not easily definable.

For Visions of Eden, I wanted the work to feel somewhat syncopated and wandering in thought. That meant finding a balance between my quiet static photographs and the movement and energy of the video stills, or balancing the coldness of the illustrations with the warmth of the family snapshots. The work needed to be cohesive but have enough ambiguity for it to take life in someone else’s imagination. Peoples’ lived experiences in regard to immigration and religion are so complex that they can’t be narrated in any one definitive way. Visions of Eden, hopefully, is a rejection of that singularity.

Yes, there’s definitely something special and intimate about flipping through a photobook! For your monograph, you recently released a second edition which is different from your first (redesigned, added images, etc.). Why did you decide to make it different? Was the editing mainly a solitary process?

The first edition was a partially hand-made object. Illustrations were printed on translucent vellum paper and then tipped into the gutter of the book. When you flip through the pages, those vellum sheets would overlap over certain images, creating a collage-like effect. That was my original concept for this book. Doing this, however, was so laborious and time consuming, and not to mention expensive! Regretfully, I wound up making only twenty copies of that first edition. I wanted the work shared with a wider audience so that’s why I decided to publish a second run.

The latest edition is more of a straight-forward production without the vellum paper. With this change in design, I had to reconfigure the layout. I took liberties in swapping out some images or adding new ones altogether. Also, a beautiful afterword was contributed by my friend, artist, writer, and curator Efrem Zelony-Mindell. I still feel so fortunate and grateful to have had my work seen and elevated by their words in my book.

For the most part, yes editing is quite a solitary process for me. But there does come a point when I feel it’s ready, where I share the work with a few trusted people. It’s always nice to have that outer support system. Much of Visions of Eden was created during my time in undergrad school so I had all sorts of feedback from peers and professors which I’m grateful for. But in the end, as the author, you ultimately have the final say in your work.

Given that Eden is a starting point and metaphor in the work, I was thinking about ideas of gardens, (forbidden) fruit, and movement of people.

How do you view yourself in relation to your place of birth? In your series, I see the most direct links in the letters, old photos where tropical foliage is present in the background, and the photo of the jackfruit (perhaps the only tropical fruit in this series).

I came to America when I was very young, about five years old. For my family and for many other families still living in the Philippines, America is seen as a sort of ideological Eden: a land of milk and honey, of wealth and excess. We all know that’s far from the truth. Every Eden has a caveat, a forbidden tree. Which leads me to ask: as an immigrant living in this country, what fruits were never intended for me?

I honestly don’t remember much about my childhood in the Philippines aside from fleeting memories of my relatives, the sounds of animals, the smell of rain and earth, the taste of my grandmother’s cooking. The identity that I carry with me now as a Filipino is not so much tied to the physical geography of a place but rather it is derived from a way of life, from shared stories, in the values we hold dear, passed on from generation to generation. This is a warm flame that lives on in me to this day as I write these words thousands of miles away from where I came.

Photographs have a way of shaping our memory and our relationship to the past, which in turn affects how we engage with the present. The family photographs and letters used in my book act as anchors in a meandering journey. They serve as landmarks that I can return to whenever I feel lost or need assurance so far away from “home”. They give me the comfort and affirmation that I need to navigate a space where I never really felt I belonged. The spread in my book that you mentioned—the jackfruit on one side, and the Saran-wrapped apple on the preceding page—was a reference to my duality as both Filipino and American. It’s a reminder and an acknowledgment that I am a sum of many things, of many people who have shaped me. If I flourish in life, it’s because my roots were nourished by love.

I like how you mentioned photos as anchors or landmarks. Isn’t that why we create and photograph? To mark certain points in our lives and to envision possible futures, like a cartographer mapping an inner journey. Do you feel like you and your relationships with those you photographed changed through the process of making your works?

When my parents took pictures of our family, it wasn’t done solely in the name of remembrance; it also served as an affirmation of ourselves and our journey—a celebration. Every birthday, vacation, school ceremony, or even the seemingly insignificant events of daily life were all photographed or video-taped as a way of saying to ourselves, “Here we are. Look how far we’ve come. Look at the life we’ve made. And here’s the proof”.

Now, holding a camera and photographing my family through my own lens still carries all of that celebratory joy, but with so much more possibility. Before I really took photography seriously, I never realized its potential as a medium for introspection, but that’s ultimately what it has become for me. In taking pictures of my family, I not only clarify my own feelings about them, but the act of photography itself informs and builds on my relationship with each person. The camera is not a mere recording device, but a tool for understanding, processing, and even expressing love...or resentment. Though I may not be visible in my pictures, my presence is there: in my proximity, my gaze, my focus.

Does all of this impact my relationships? Absolutely. Photographing another person willingly always demands some degree of trust and vulnerability from both sides. There’s a silent dialogue that occurs which feels like an exchange of secrets. I think that’s why I often don’t feel comfortable photographing other people unless we’re very close. Usually my family is open enough to reveal themselves to me, other times what they give can feel quite guarded. That’s a constant negotiation. After the photograph is made though, nobody ever emerges the same person because each of us has relinquished something, no matter how small.

Being self-reflexive in photography is so important. I agree it should be a constant negotiation, but it’s something that bothers me these days – the power dynamic between the photographer and photograph, particularly for personal and documentary projects. More significantly, after the photograph has been made, who is really benefiting. But I guess if we are sensitive to that then perhaps we can navigate that tricky path and find a balance.

Right, finding that balance is key and sometimes there are no clear-cut answers. That power dynamic is something I always have to be mindful of. As the photographer, you are exercising a certain role and position. At the end of the day, you’re the one essentially “taking” what you need and walking away. There’s an inherent violence or aggression in the act of taking someone’s picture, no matter how well-intended it may be. This aggression carries even greater weight when working, as you say, in a genre like documentary where representation is everything.

I remember an undergrad professor of mine, Nadia Sablin, introducing me to the work of Shelby Lee Adams—particularly his Appalachian Legacy series. Adams spent twenty-five years documenting the disadvantaged Appalachian communities in his home state of Kentucky, visiting the same families over a long period of time. Though the photographs are beautifully crafted, they pose many questions in regard to exploitation, representation, and the aestheticization of suffering. He is or was, after all, an artist thriving and profiting off of these photographs. Salgado is another that comes to mind. This was the first time I really stopped to think about the ethics of image-making. Who is benefitting from it all?

I think the search for this balance is something each photographer has to reckon with personally. Though each situation may vary with different factors that have to be weighed, and context that must be applied, you can always ask yourself these same ever-pertinent questions: am I representing people in a dignified way, and what are my intentions with these images? Communication (listening), building relationships, acknowledging your power, and respecting the people you photograph are all foundational things to consider when exercising your privilege with the camera.

Well said! The process of making photographs can be tricky to navigate yet rewarding. Any upcoming projects or ideas? What’s keeping you busy these days?

Oh, let’s just say I’m constantly juggling 3-4 ideas in my head at any given time, but ninety percent of the time they don’t ever lead to anything finished haha. This past year has been tough on everyone I’m sure. I’ve been dealing a lot with personal loss and grief and the compounded isolation brought on by the pandemic, so for months I’ve been making photographs organically as a subconscious response to these internal struggles. It’s more of an exploration of grief itself as a natural phenomenon and force—like time or gravity. Grief is something everyone will experience in life and each of us deals with it differently, but in the end we have to let it run its course. I see these photographs as a potential body of work that could materialize as a zine or book one day, so we’ll see where that goes.

Other than that, I’ve been working on an upcoming collaboration project with Cumulus Photo. Speaking of which, I saw your photograph featured in their latest zine, running to the edge of the world. Congrats on that! It’s beautiful. But yeah, just trying my best to keep busy and sane, and improving myself any way I can.

Thanks! Looking forward to your upcoming projects! Last question: any music to recommend?

I feel like my answer to this question can vary by the week. I go through phases where I exhaust whole albums on repeat until I get tired of them. So I’ll leave you with the two currently on my rotation: Angles by The Strokes, and Screamadelica by Primal Scream.

Thank you for your time!

Thank you for a lovely discourse. I had a lot of fun!

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scarsmood · 3 years

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Mental Health and Otherkinity

This is my panel I did today! enjoy! it’s the script

My name is scar im apart of a system of 4, I am mightyenakin from pokemon. Trans ftm and very queer. We have a lot to go over so lets jump in.

Today I want to talk about my experience with being psychological kin. Talk about how this has shaped me as a person. How the community handles psychological kin as well as the greater outside world. So lets get into it. Otherkinity has been in my life ever since I can remember. From the age of 3 I can remember feeling non human and having alters that were also non human. I’ve also found for my life and my experience my mental health and my otherkinity are two things that have wound themselves together. I can never look at one without the other are both play a critical role in my identity.

I can say as psychological otherkin right now I stand at an interesting intersection of my life where I have the most freedom I have ever had and dealing with the worst trauma I’ve had to face. I recently got out of a bad long term relationship of something I had been in for 7 years. I can say the events I’ve lived did and still do directly impact my identity and change how I see myself.

for me I cannot explore my otherkinity without exploring my trauma and mental health

these two parts of myself are closely woven together. DID is a product of trauma and it’s something that rules over my life daily.

It is something I don’t just accommodate it is a way of life for me.

For the past 3 years I’ve been in intensive therapy going at least once every two weeks. At one point going twice a week, completed an inpatient and outpatient program. Needless to say I have been fortunate enough to not be in a lot of debt. However I would like to think that these things have helped me immensely. With the background talk out of the way lets get into how these things have shaped my identity.

A little bit about me. I am diagnosed with DID or dissociative identity disorder. This means my identity is split apart between alters or alternate personalities. If your unfamiliar with plurality I can say with confidence that can be its own talk but heres what you need to know.

• My alters are distinct each having their own morals, ideals, life perspective, lived experiences and memories separate from my own.

• We all share one body like roommates share an apartment space

• My alters are a result of trauma I experienced during my life. Each of us hold our share of trauma so imaging trauma is sandbags instead of 1 person holding 100 pounds of sand we have given 25 pounds of sand to 4 alters. Which is much more manageable.

• My alters including me were shaped from the environment they came from

· Alters also share an inner world where they can interact with one another. This also a place where I can easily my identity and how I view myself internally.

Some others fun things about me is I have some mild psychotic symptoms. Since I’m in my early 20’s they’re pretty manageable at the moment I am always keeping an eye out for them worsening though. These things include hallucinations visual, auditory, touch, smell, taste. I also have a weird mix of beliefs that can mix into delusion territory but aren’t damaging to my life and therefore cant really place a good label on them. So I consider them delusional like but not the same experience as a true delusion I believe I could very much be wrong.

my first identity shift was when I was a child about 3 years old was the first time me as an alter became prominently separate from our host. It was apparently at that time I was non human and a hyena. I looked like a hyena from lion king roughly no character in particular and acted as a companion/ friend.

When I got a bit older at 4-5 my identity shifted once I moved and left behind some family. I changed from a hyena to a pokemon. If I could guess I would say due to a pokemons inherent loyalty. My identity became a mightyena a wolfish hyena basically and the codependency that pokemon carry also carried over.

I was depended on to be support for our host and to take care of them as a friend and caretaker. We experienced neglect at the time and this was reflected with my identity. I was a creature that was supposed to stay with someone forever basically giving a comfort we were missing to our host so they could continue functioning. I would say my identity changes based on my environment and is sensitive to my environment all the time

depending on what I experience I see myself change and adapt because of how sensitive we are as a system trying to adapt in the world around us. I often think if my identity isn’t shifting a little it might be a sign of trouble and us shutting down being unable to adapt and change.

When I was 5-6 it changed to its own species a threatening wolf. Which it stayed until a few months ago. My identity as a threatening wolf changed a lot I had spikes then got a sword tail then was able to breathe fire, my size would shift and change, my tail length and ability to move it would change. Teeth, eye color, would all change depending on my environment. For example when I was deep in abuse with my ex I gained the ability to breathe fire suddenly as a needed adaption to scare them away. My eyes turned red to look scarier. I got bigger. This all happened internally as my ex was able to interact within our system in our inner world. Which is a terrible idea by the way don’t be an idiot like me. Which was why I needed to look scarier as a way of protection

Lately I have been healing from trauma and now that my ex is gone so is a lot of pressure to defend myself so I turned back into a mightyena which is much more defenseless but much truer to how I see myself in a safe space. Im sure if trauma happened again I would shift back to a threatening wolf as a means for protection. When it comes to plurality labels I fall under protector and host we are pretty integrated though so we have grown out of most typical labels due to how functional each of us are now.

This concept of a changing identity is taboo in otherkin communities

usually we are lead to believe when we were kids we have always been one strict animal for our whole lives and just now learning about it. this animal never changes it is static unchanging and we simply learn about it as we grow up. My experience has been wholly different. My animal and my identity changes based on my environment it can be subtle or drastic. I never evoke or ask for the changes they simply happen and I have to adapt to the new way I see myself. Trying to apply my identity to the common otherkin rhetoric gave me a lot of grief as a teenager

when I was about 13 because I would discover something about myself say breathing fire or growing in size and be ashamed because I knew these changes were not “typical”

as an aside I think this notion that my experience is atypical is also false. I think this is fairly common but a lot of otherkin just handle it in a way that flows with the static concept where we learn we have a new kin type but still also have the old one, we learn something about our kin type that totally shifts it but connect it back to our old kin type, we find new features, personality traits or experiences that now define our kintype that were never there before and newly discovered

Otherkinity is about self discovery and how it’s essentially chasing a dragon. Literally. We will never fully know our internal identity no matter how closely we look into it. there is so much that we learn and how to weave into our identity otherkintiy is as much of an art as it is a science when it comes to self reflection. It’s just like any other aspect of ourselves we can create labels for our sexuality and they work but they don’t capture 100% of what you experience theyre a short hand for others. I find that otherkinity is this concept on steroids. I find my identity to be a much larger part as it impacts everything including my sexuality it is more prominent for me so trying to put it under labels becomes increasingly difficult.

How are we supposed to create a short hand for who we are? All of those moving pieces inside of us that shape our perspective, experiences, how we interact with people, how we love people, how we go through day to day life, and we are supposed to just say something like “bear therian” what if it changes? What if we have quirks that our outside of this label? When I first joined the otherkin community it was pretty frowned upon to change your identity. You had to be a wolf therian, you had to be a dragonkin. Once you picked a label that was it. your locking into your identity if you didn’t you weren’t taken seriously.

Ableism in the otherkin community

I question as well if this correlation between identity stability and maturity/credibility is ableism. Usually I noticed when I first join the therian and otherkin community there was a push for “not looking crazy” so as to not get bullied further for identities. I’m sure anyone in the LGBT community knows trying to please people making fun of you really doesn’t work. There is a prominent fear of seeming to outsiders as if were roleplaying or kinning for fun which seems to be a whole other topic in and of itself. My personal experience has lead me to the conclusion that these people are going to come at you regardless of how often you shift your identity, how seriously or goofy you take it, how analytical you are with your identity whether you write essays or one sentence it does not change the views of outsiders.

Endels, clinical lycanthropes, and other nonhumans who have mental illness-based identities face a similar ableism. It wasn’t until earlier this year, 2021, when the connection between mental illness and nonhumanity was finally accepted by the greater community. But even still, Endelic communities are more often treated as a novelty; not something to be taken seriously as an identity, just something “interesting.” Mental illness, especially psychotic disorders, aren’t pretty or tame, and the greater nonhuman community appears to subtly enforce this stigma. Werewolves are monsters, and the greater community spares no feelings in reminding us of this, with such unwelcome words my friend babydog’s met as and I paraphrase a quote here from my friend baby dog “you’re welcome here, but you should expect people to uncomfortable about your identity as an endel or question your endelity. I dont personally believe people like you should be part of alterhuman communities.” End quote Many of those who are part of the greater alterhuman community are still concerned about respectability politics, how we appear to outsiders, rather than being concerned about how inner-community members are finding their welcome. Arguments like “But, clinical lycanthropy was previously used as ammunition against all Otherkin! We’re playing into anti-kin’s stereotypes!” isn’t an excuse anymore, because throwing your own community under the bus isn’t acceptable anymore. We want a higher standard in this community than being driven by shame that makes us hide members of our own community. It’s much better to stand with them.

Lets also take a moment to acknowledge these actions stemmed from an act of seeming more credible and not “crazy”. I’d like to say also that the stereotype of crazy doesn’t exist when we think of crazy we think of someone whose mentally Ill and struggling to function. In reality these people have an untreated mental illness or going through an episode that’s only one aspect of a person. They do other things with their life including myself. I write poems and go out with friends but if someone only judged me at my worst and lowest I would fit into this “crazy” stereotype. Its not fair for us to judge people based on actions they cant control. Based on trauma or brain chemistry people are more than that I think can agree.

we should be understanding with these people treating them as whole people not just one descriptor. crazy is really just a derogatory name for someone with a mental illness. So to avoid being crazy means to avoid any signs of neurodiversity people view as abnormal. Or signs of nonconformity with nuerotypicals

-endels still face ableism typically in the form of being treated like a novelty and not really being taken seriously. Endels are still getting called interesting a lot) and it makes them feel like a specimen within their own community. I’m sure those who suffer from mental illness understand how degrading it is to be looked at as some sort of test subject or lab rat. I think as a community we can do better and be more accepting and open to all forms of otherkinity. Shutting down this kinda of language would be great for endel otherkin.

-endels are still having to deal with other community members who use psychotic/delusional/etc as insults or jokey words. These words are derogatory and insulting they shouldn’t be said as insults or jokes there are plenty of other words that could be used and it pushes endels and otherkin with psychotic symptoms away from the larger community. Using this language shows an ignorance to the ableism still alive and active towards endels.

-none of this helps internalized ableism!! All the actions described above only reinforce internalized ablism. This creates a combative and toxic environment for endels and otherkin with psychotic symptoms. It would be in our best interest as a community to help bring down ableism and be more aware of what were saying and to who.

Some things to keep in mind

-treating psychotics like they cant make their own choices is not ok/ thinking for them

-insults and jokes using derogatory language is triggering and alienating

-treating psychotics as lab rats or something to gauk at as “interesting” is demoralizing and takes away someones individual power as a person. Its hard to have an identity and a voice if everyone is busy staring at you like a lab rat.

What about the internal side of the otherkin community? I found when I was apart of the therian community this was a more prominent problem and still is in some corners I wander into. Otherkinity also holds some ableist views but from what I’ve seen not to the same intensity as therian communities. This I would say is a cultural difference from a new age of therians that took over the internet, p-shifting cults, wolf packs, and some forums for therians were intense I know previously therians and otherkin identities didn’t have to much of a difference besides animalistic tendencies or a way to further define an identity. Once this shift happened it became more so about earthly creatures or animals based on earth. earth mythics, animals that exist present day and extinct, and plants as well. I’m not an expert of the history of otherkin and therians so I would direct you to house of chimeras and who is page for more information over it gladly. If im wrong please correct me. That’s my understanding. This shift to earthly animals also carried a sentiment or notion of being more “real” than otherkin that I often experienced in the wolf packs and forums. Since they’re identities were based on “real” animals it made them more valid otherkin. An easy question I asked often or others would ask was a simple “why?” and the response I experienced a lot was “so were more credible/ don’t seem crazy” this was 8-9 years ago which was at the time the height of otherkin hate. It came across as a borderline phobia to be seen as an antikin steriotypes which were ableist stereotypes to begin with. some of these communities in reaction created ridged and strict cultures of how to be therian. This would leave an imprint on many people including myself.

so that was 8-9 years ago why do I bring it up? Because I still see this sentiment present just subtle.

Some things I feel were carried over is: Overly present and specific about kin types, an obsession with details and intricacies to a degree where its no longer beneficial to learn, embarrassed or shamed for certain kin types, a focal point on kin type tendencies and ignoring or pushing aside human experiences to further pronounce a kin type. A fixation on the past and not taking into account of the present, always centering around the past. I would say these behaviors in the community were influenced from the wolf pack cultural shift.

These are a remanent set of reactions from a more intense time of grilling, questioning and if validity was questioned your title could be easily taken away in close knit communities. I think the otherkin community still has some skeletons in the closet so to speak of a more intense time that a lot of members endured and witnessed. We passed on this culture, myself included as we grew up cause its how we learned to present our otherkinity. We can unlearn though and I think it’s time to push for more freedom and new ways to take on otherkinity. a larger problem I see is a fixation with the past which once it gets to a certain point I don’t think can be constructive or healthy. Exploring your past is good, gaining context for your actions and your background is good, but living in the past is not healthy. Reshaping how you live in the present by escaping to the past isn’t really healthy. I find it worrying how common it is for otherkin to not tie their humanity and the present to their identity. It hurts to say, it can be uncomfortable but being human is apart of our experience. Now my therapists always say “never damn a coping skill” if looking to the past and living in the past finds you comfort and it keeps you stable that’s ultimately a good thing your staying stable and keeps you functioning. I urge though for people to start to take the time to explore humanity with our otherkin identities and living more in the present. How your identity effects you right now. How people interact with you and what you can do to tie your otherkinity to the physical world to the present. I think it’s a balancing act ultimately trying to find a sweet spot between the past and the present. Not completely ignoring your past and only staying in the present or only living in the past and neglecting the present. Its not easy and something im actively working on myself.

I want to highlight the present cultural imprint the wolf pack phase in present day otherkin communties and how new otherkin members seeing and reacting to it. we as older members may not realize how impactful our words are and may not notice us carrying an imprint of the past with us. Here some quotes I picked up. I asked a few friends their experiences who had come as otherkin in the past 6 months. I was also able to get 1 anecdote anon from my tumblr after sending out a request earlier today they are also pretty recent. Here what they had to say. These are all anonymous.

“(tumblr)My experience was pretty good! The community is super open and friendly, or at least the side of it I'm on (idk about the fictionkin side of it which might be more controversial/full of discourse).

It was easy to get into which is good because I was super scared about it 😅” “(friend) the whole community is

scary, for me at least, mostly because some of the older grey muzzles seem really intimidating and cliquey

the discord group im in seems like really cool to me, they are all super nice and helpful but the rest of the community is super scary for me”

“(friend) [when asked about getting into the community] it's weird to me, it really is.

I've spent a good chunk of time just like

wondering what it could possibly mean to be "valid" otherkin

like, who's judgement is that? mine?”

My Take on otherkinity

Im telling my story because my mental illness causes me to fall into an undesired or taboo identity categories or stereotypes of otherkin often. I find instability, identities that are less material or easily relatable, signs of mental illness with otherkinity. Are swept under the rug. I’d like to change that and show that instability, less relatable, highly specific or vague identities are just as valid. My experiences can be something of an uncomfortable truth for some that otherkin can be cringy or be easier to target from outsiders. I ask to everyone that has some reservations about accepting more diverse identities to consider how beneficial these new perspectives bring to our community. These identities give a perspective and voice we are missing and is needed. It’s beneficial for our community to be heard fully so we can support and help everyone. Endels may have a perspective other therians/otherkin may not have considered before. the wider range of experiences about our community that we share the better. It gives us the tools to make the community even stronger.

I would say overall psychological kin are extremely diverse and no experience is going to be the same. Its difficult at best to say anything that all psychological kin experience because the definition is so broad. We all have unique and diverse stories and I’d like to encourage everyone to share them even if they show mental illness. Things like Delusions, trauma responses, trauma sourced, episodes and regression. I would love to see more inclusivity for the messier and less understood part of psychological kin.

So lets get into some of my specific experiences. my identity is messy at the moment as my brain seems to have an interesting understanding of what a mightyena is. It has 2 images instead of one

These two images are houndoom and mightyena. Both of them I see myself as but are the same entity. My brain cant see the difference between the two as an identity at the moment. So theyre both “mightyena” its quirks like this that I think should be seen as more acceptable in the community because its messy at best. It has made me on several occasions go “that makes 0 sense” but from a trauma stand point it doesn’t surprise me

my brain has trouble picking only one. If my 5 year old or 3 year old brain attached itself to both images and called them the same then well that’s it im both of them at once. Brains don’t tend to work very logically and while it sounds confusing I would say it probably feels similar to having 2 kin types active at once. The two identities don’t blend (ie mightyena wolf hyena doesn’t breathe fire while houndoom does. ) I experience a range of both identities at once. They’re both mightyena it just so happens that image that’s associated with houndoom is present when something happens that only that pokemon could do or associated feelings or states. I would say theyre 2 different kin types except if I say I have a houndoom kin type I don’t think of anything and don’t feel anything. When I say I have a mightyena kin type I have images and feelings from both. They also cant seem to be separated both images and associations need the other. Its interesting. Its very funky. The wonderful world of trauma. Could probably make anew label for that but that’s alright im not one for labels.

I experience something I call m-shifting which is really animal regression. It’s called m shifting because I was previously in an p-shifting cult where it developed it. it’s uncontrollable but I can start it or trigger it if I want to. When I go into an m-shift I cant understand English, read English, walk on two legs well, speak, or know basic things most people would know. My brain goes into instincts and impulses. I don’t think critically or contemplate much. My thoughts are in images and feelings. Its fun. But its difficult to control, I find it’s a way for me to relieve stress in excess when I cant seem to find a good outlet for it. this is part of my identity is what makes me relate to the werewolf community so much since its involuntary and frowned upon generally to greater society .(aka internalized ableism) One of my biggest fears is shifting in public or with friends. It’s hard on me for sure.

Another thing that effects me is coping linking as someone who deals with trauma I have found lately I’m starting to create involuntary coping links. I had a brief coping link as a sled dog its purpose was the personality of a sled dog was something I needed to be at the moment to stay functional and coherent once I learned to do that without my coping link it went away. I notice myself having brief coping links on and off each of them usually teach me something or a skill I couldn’t fully understand yet.

I experience false memories. My memories change depending on my identity. I don’t force or make them change they simply do.

they hold the same narrative throughout all the changes though. The narrative from what I understand seems to be a re telling of my trauma. My false memories don’t seem to be a major part of my identity and I think I may have them simply because of p-shifting cult trauma and the pressure to have a past life or noemata. I think my false memories are a way to retell my trauma in a form that gives me validation as an animal. I do know seeing myself as human in memories is inherently triggering for me as I cant recognize myself so a set of false memories that lets me see myself in those situations as an animal is comforting and validating. It helps me evaluate my trauma better and understand why I feel the way I do about trauma. A dog that looses its molars would be distraught while a human doesn’t really care if they get wisdom teeth removed. Evaluating trauma through an animalstic lens has helped me immensely. I’ve noticed the more I evaluate and see my trauma through an animal lens the weaker my false memories become and I think that’s neat.

My perspective of the world also changes as my identity shifts

I see the world differently as a mightyena than I do as a threatening wolf. Objects, people, environments and habitats have different meanings to me and associations according to shifts and how my identity changes. These associations and meanings are ones that either I had when I was a child, or ones I repressed due to being childish or something I didn’t see as acceptable at the time. So my identity now has a wider range of perspective. My threatening wolf perspective toned down a lot and let the repressed associations and meanings take a more dominant role.

Another thing that effects my otherkinity is when it comes to species dysphoria I would say it’s a large factor in how I experience otherkinity. I would say my otherkintiy is something very based in the present. I don’t think about my kintypes past, I don’t think about its future or let my mind wander off a lot about whats going on with it. I am usually observing it in the present moment. A big part of that is my species dysphoria which tells me a lot about what I am. I’m trans female to male though that’s debatable as im considering a gender to my kintype. Human gender dysphoria is something that bothers me a decent amount. What has sent me to therapy though is species dysphoria. It is unbearable for me. I have fangs, a tail, a collar, wolfsbane pendant for mythology about werewolves, pointed nails, short hair thicker hair to resemble my kin type. I had to learn how to make animal vocalizations like growling, snarling, whimpering because I felt incredibly stressed being unable to emote properly. I learned to walk on all fours and run as well. I learned to play and move like an animal mostly from m shifting but it helps immensely. Getting on T has helped a lot as I got furrier, deeper voice, thicker hair, generally able to gain muscle better. Overall has helped my species dysphoria. Its something I’ve always had that brings me immense discomfort. I’m planning to make a prosthetic muzzle to wear and possibly some ears.

This dysphoria is apparent when you see me on the street cause im wearing a collar, tail everything I can’t hide my otherkinity because it triggers my species dysphoria to much to hide it so I just have to roll with it. the census? Its really not that bad being out or showing im otherkin. It’s a good conversation starter and most people are friendly about it here which has been nice. I do get asked if im a furry I usually say yes just cause I don’t feel like explaining otherkinity. If someone asks why I usually just say I see myself as an animal. Responses are mixed but people are polite about it. wearing gear makes me feel much more grounded in where I stand with my identity. I noticed a feel much more confident about myself when I am being myself unabashedly. Who knew. Also planning to get some combat boots and add some spikes to them to imitate claws. Should be fun.

Heading back to my weird quirks and otherkinity experience Phantom shifts are something I experience all the time 24/7. In part due to p-shifting cult and also a way to manage my species dysphoria. It’s pretty intense for me and its something I find comfort in and encourage. It’s a way for me to find the world more relatable. Often these shifts calm me down and make it easier for me to navigate the world. I would say my phantom shifts only effects parts of my body im aware of not my entire body all the time. Rather whatever body parts im using. It also does its best to not have any “clipping” through objects and my shift may phase out if there may be clipping to a body part im aware of.

Lastly My gender and sexuality I would say tie to my kintype as well. Im attracted to otherkin moreso than humans. I really like animalistic aspects to people and traits I see in my kintype in other people. I find I get along best with canine kintypes. My gender im realizing is more so tied heavily to my kintype I want to be a male mightyena whatever that entails and it plays closely with my species dysphoria. I find when I relieve my species dysphoria I tend to also relieve a bit of my gender dysphoria to. I say im ftm as a short hand because that’s what my kintypes gender seems to line up with the most. Though I think that will be less and less the case as I start wearing things like a prosthetic muzzle which is pretty animal gender to me.

Therapy and Otherkinity

On this topic I would like to talk about how therapy and otherkinity interact cause that’s something central to this panel. For me I always noticed that when I am given analogies in therapy they are always about an inner child, how I was as a human kid, how I am as an adult. These things are good but they lack the context of me as a whole. I am not just a human I am an animal in a human body which changes a lot in how I’ve had to take care of myself and apply advice given to me by professionals. For one I always have to tell professionals im otherkin and what that entails. That it isn’t a hobby or one aspect of me but something that impacts my entire perspective. Methods of self soothing just wont work for me if I don’t change some wording around. There is no inner child for me personally theres a puppy and a puppy seeks out an entirely different sets of behaviors, emotions, and emotes/ way of communication than an inner child would. You would be able to talk to an inner child hug them and act as a type of parent to them. With a puppy I tend to act more as an owner or an animal parent depending on whats needed.as an owner i have to bridge the communication gap with things like chew toys, petting, dark cozy places, brushing or grooming, non verbal communication

which plays a much larger part in my healing process than what I read or what methods im taught. As an owner to myself I have to learn to take care of my inner puppy the way I needed which can be difficult when no one you know has to follow that method. As an animal parent I also have to act as I am, an animal to my inner puppy that’s what we both understand the common language we speak is non human and is critical to my healing. I find protecting my inner puppy as an animal parent gives me a larger sense of catharsis it feels like something I can finally understand however the methods don’t translate well to the real world. I cant just snarl at people I have to talk to them in a disagreement. I cant go hunting I have to go shopping. Which is why having both an owner and an animal parent.

Both are important because both aspects cant be ignored and need to be used in tandem.

Healing for me when it comes to trauma involves a lot of balancing between my human life and my animalistic needs which is something I have had to do and explain to therapists the difficulties of doing so. I notice most therapists I have met cant seem to grasp this and see otherkinity as more of a metaphor than an identity. I noticed a lot of my therapists would just change metaphors to talk to me instead of reshaping a technique for healing which has caused a lot of problems. An example I can think off the top of my head is instead of “a family sticks together” may be “a wolf pack sticks together” which is helpful sometimes but if it’s the only change it becomes detrimental to me. Often because while not intentional I think a lot of therapies are human-centric. There is an assumption you are human in order to apply the coping techniques or healing strategies. This lead to me unintentionally repressing a larger chunk of my otherkinity just because I was applying these skills without changing anything. Sometimes present day I still fall into this and notice it triggers my species dysphoria to worsen. It can be difficult to spot for me as well because otherkinity is so uncommon no one else is having the same issue in my real life friend groups. So I assume whatever im doing must be ok cause it seems to work ok for everyone else. Which ends up not being the case.

A solution I’ve found to help with this is for one explaining as I go with a therapist what is and is not working. I have to be an advocate for myself and teach them as well what I like and what works and what doesn’t. I try my best to let them know when something they do is detrimental. I also try to explain what brings me comfort and what doesn’t. a nice talk isn’t going to help my puppy self but a hug would. Things like that. When it comes to internal imagery some therapists use I know stating to them youd like them to consider your kintype as yourself has helped me by them not seeing me as a fully human being or just my irl body. overall I hope this talk has helped some people. Given some new perspectives. And I am happy or reiterate some topics I went over. Thanks for coming to my ted talk.

#long post #it was 11 pages #im so sorry #otherkin #therian #fictionkin #psychologicalkin

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queenangst · 4 years

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Soooo I'm curious, what do you mean when you say your being ace affects fandom for you? In what way?

so all of this is what i think and it's certainly not scientific or anything, but our identities absolutely shape us as consumers and creators - what kind of media we consume, our preferences, and what kind of media we create & that includes being aspec (which nobody really ever talks about the intersection of, at least not that i've personally seen)

in terms of fandom what that often means is gravitating towards media that aligns with our identities and thus our preferences, or gives us the space to do so for example, bnha is a very team-focused, found family-esque, no overtly shown romantic relationships, which is a wonderful space for a lot of aces to be drawn to because it's media that can reflect our own relationships and so on

and for a lot of the other media that i have consumed in the past, especially in regards to fandoms, they end up being really similar in that regard (not to say that i don't consume or enjoy media with romantic relationships, which i do, or that every ace has the same preferences) but i do think it tends to happen

going onto what kind of media we create

i kind of touched on this a few months ago in this post i made about gen content in fandom (though i put my personal thoughts about how being ace affected that in the tags) wherein gen is often disregarded by larger fandom and shippers in a lot of fandom spaces

and in the tags i wrote:

i didn't write this in the post but also: this is even more complicated by my own identity and experiences as well while i share this information willingly i will say no writer OWES an explanation for why they write what they write or why you might make them uncomfortable i share this willingly here in the tags bc its more personal than i want this post to be

but for me im aroace and that directly affects the content i want to produce as well as interpretations and me identifying with certain characters even IF i NEVER make any allusion to, or say so explicitly and its not like that for everyone people are different creators are different and as a sidenote i ship HAPPILY i love shipping there are some ships i am so passionate and excited about and love as romance, but when i make things platonic i kind of... want them to be platonic lol? you know???? and its not Exactly the same if u reverse the situations bc ship to gen content proportionally is not... the same

i absolutely create content that is for me, and that content is for a large part gen! and it's gen because i'm ace!

there are a lot of characters that i implicitly write as ace, and characters that i implicitly interpret as ace (aroace) bc i strongly identify with them (like all might and aizawa, which is why when i write them they are never in romantic relationships, and why personally erasermic sometimes makes me uncomfortable)

so while i don't generally go into fandom like "i am ace and i only want to make this content and consume this content" it still strongly affects what i consume and create regardless of if that is my particular intention

because it is a part of who i am, it informs the way i view the world around me, and we like to see ourselves in the media around us

also, wrt "why are so many of the people here ace?" i think a lot of ace people in fandom tend to be drawn together (i.e. in this server) because we make and consume similar content (on a larger scale, the media, on a smaller scale, the fanworks based on that particular media). like to like is generally how things go, we are naturally drawn to people who share similar experiences and taste. thus, the reason this server, or other servers, or other parts of the bnha community is where you might find a lot of ace fans is because we end up finding each other through the content we make, share, post about, and so on.

post edited for clarity purposes.

#asks #aspec talk #aspec stuff #anonymous

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holy-mountaineering · 3 years

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This spread is for @mirronx Thank you, as always!

Here’s the full Qabalistic Tree of Life Spread that I do. What I’m going to do is go through and briefly explain each card, its position on the Tree, and then I’ll give you a summary/synopsis of the spread as a whole. You know the routine.

Think of this spread as a sort of quantum map, or even the land of a regular map, everything is happening at once, in each place. It’s important to think of yourself as moving “through” the map but you are also simultaneously everywhere at once. For the sake of this specific experiment, think of this as a map. Maybe as a person, the Qabalistic Adam Kadmon.

Where we’re starting the journey from is Kether, the monad, the first sign of creation. We’ll call this your hometown, since it is where you’re from originally. Here we have XV The Devil OR The Lord of the Gates of Matter, Ayin, Capricorn.

The Goat-Fish who is half in the mountains and half in the deeps of the oceans, high places and the deep. This guy gets a REALLY bad rap that is very unwarranted. All The Devil is trying to do is Incarnate or materialize by Higher methods.

The card is a giant cock with faceless little white people in the balls looking like they want out, again, possibility is trying to take hold and become a physical thing. The Devil IS a trickster (“you little devil” and assorted shit sayings like that) so that worries some people. Those people are squares and probably have bad taste in music.

Manifest your potential and figure it out when it’s “real” and not just a passing thought or whim.

In Chokmah, which is like your freeway getting you out onto the road out of your hometown is the 6 of Cups, Pleasure.

For reasons, I call this the plumbing card. The water is not flowing freely as though it is pouring, it has been pumped through a series of tubes intricately woven together to fill the cups placed in the shape of a hexagram. Emotion and connectedness to life are intentionally being directed by unseen but invited forces. Someone who wasn’t looking closely could see nothing but knots and chaos and even wonder how the damn thing worked in the first place. Those people are squares and should be avoided at all costs.

Do what gives you pleasure that also instills clarity. Center on the best you can feel even if onlookers can’t appreciate what you’re doing connoisseurs (and you) will dig it.

In Binah, which is ruled by Saturn and for the sake of this reading we will call the first stop on your roadtrip. You haven’t really arrived anywhere but you’re stopping and getting a chance to repack your car in a more efficient way. Sitting in Binah is the 10 of Cups, Satiety.

This is the emotional peak experience. This peak is a feeling of a connection, a filling up with life’s water and flowing out to all other life. Intuition is raised here if you look from your mountain top where your perspective is different. The accumulated force of the suit of water is forcing its way forward and down and cutting a path as it goes. Be careful you don’t get too swept up and fall from this height.

You’re coming to a peak emotional/relationship(s with those around you) experience. Enjoy the view but descend carefully.

In Chesed which is ruled by Jupiter and again for the sake of this experiment we’ll say involves your influence and benevolence in your current trip is the 5 of Disks, Worry.

Like all of the 5s in Tarot, this is the microcosmic or human number . Don’t believe me? Stand up, stick your arms and legs out and counting your head, congrats, you’re a pentagram. Lord knows people worry like motherfuckers about how they are going to get by in the “normal” world, so there is a stress and strain in this card that everyone late on a bill can understand. This is the worry that you’ll get your intelligence (Mercury) smothered by the laborious strain of Taurus. This is, like all 5s a human limitation issue.

Well it won’t unless you only see your limitations and make it happen. Be smarter about you material situation so you don’t have to work harder.

Across the Tree in Geburah, which is Mars Town, where you find your drive and what you’re trying to accomplish/conquer is (another 5) the 5 of Swords, (mental/communication) Defeat.

Like all 5s this is the microcosmic or human card, if you don’t believe me stand up and stick out your arms and legs, boom, you’re a pentagram. Swords are mind, thought processes, communication and the like, and this is mental growth limited by its mundane focus or dwelling on the limitations of yourself and other individuals.

Realize your limitations and the limitations of others. You are seriously just a human and so is everyone else. Try to focus your mind on bigger picture things instead of mundane/shitty people, ideas, thoughts, and ways of thinking.

In Tiphareth, the Sun and center of gravity holding all this in place, the heart pumping the blood through this, your heart is XVIII The Moon, Pieces, Qoph.

This is the ‘Sun at midnight where you stand shines on the other side of the world’. The pull of night and day eventually rising, illuminating what was once dark. As opposed to the old Aeon idea of the Sun dying, this is the cyclic motion of the push and pull of the day and night. The dark gives the light context and vis-a-versa.

See the light in the dark, accept the cyclic push and pull, if you don’t like what “time of day it is” in your life I assure you it will change like the tides.

In Netzach, Venus town, where you have the realization about how this is going to change you as a person with a personality is XXI The Universe, Saturn, Tau.

The Universe is the totality of what we can sense and know. The dance of the Woman with the cosmic serpent and the Eye destroying while everything constantly recreates. We see the Universe only from our position in it. You may send out your satellites to explore unknown areas but you can only process what they might mean from your place. The more we try to take into our restrictive minds and spirits, the more we know about the whole and ourselves and our place in the Universe.

Step back and look at the connections and totality of everything you know and experience. It’s quite a view.

In Mercury Town Hod-ville, where all the Universities are and everyone has real intellectual shit going on is the YET ANOTHER 5, WHAT’RE YOU A TAURUS??? The 5 of Wands, Strife.

Like all the 5s, this is a microcosmic or human number. It’s also the halfway point between two things. This is the drag when you see how far you’ve come and see that you have the exact same grueling distance to go. Your feet will start to drag. The natural friction of motion becomes very apparent here and it is more annoying and nagging than anything else.

You might be stuck between a rock and a shitty place with what you’re doing, but just truck on, it’s not so bad once you get past where you are and get moving at full speed again.

On the Moon in Yesod, the receptive and reflective place that is alot about the feelings that you’re picking up from all this is the 10 of Disks, Wealth.

This card is intelligence (Mercury) in fertile possibility (Virgo). This is the peak material situation, a good situation, a situation you really want to be in.

Be swift and mindful of your material task at hand and your everyday experience, it is nearing its end and you stand to profit.

Put your smarts and your communication skills in the most fertile possibilities and cash in before things start to come down from this peak opportune time.

Down here in Malkuth-istan, the everyday life mundane, waking up pooping, and going to work world is the Ace of Disks, the root power of Earth or the material.

This is the foundation which all your solid structures are and will be built on. This is the very root of your real world/material life situation. While this doesn’t mean you must tear everything down or that there is nothing in your material world that you’ve built, it does mean you must look at the source from which you’ve built your material and everyday world. If you have no foundation you can have no structure. If you have a shoddy foundation, you’ll have a shoddy structure. Look to what things were like before you began building. Is there sand beneath you? Are you in a swamp, building castles of stone that will bind to the mud and be pulled down much sooner than later? Did you account for the raise in elevation when you laid your foundation? Look down to the base of what you’ve made and what you’ve made it upon.

This is an engineering job, you’ll need tools to measure and level everything out. The occult might not be the best place to find these tools and it is possible that you have issues much more base than you’re willing to cop to. There are many tools you can use to look at your foundation provided in psychology and meditation from other sources. The Universe throws us extreme situations and more often than not, this is the only way people see their basest of instincts and behaviors really act out. If you can, take a look at what connects you and what you’re building to the Earth before an earthquake, tornado, volcano, or other act of G-D forces you to pray everything was fine. Check the strength of your foundations before the strength of your foundations are checked.

Get down to the base fundamentals of what is going on in your material (things, money, living situation, literal stuff) and build from the ground up if you must.

Alright, so, it’s time to make manifest the possibilities, the desires that have gone unspoken, don’t worry about other people’s interpretations of YOU and your wants and needs, there will be those who care to unravel the tangle that is each of us as an individual. You WILL find this, in some way, some how, and that WILL be that big emotional release and connection that you’ve been feeling is around the bend, it’s coming up, fear not!

Seriously, don’t kill your own vibe, or your ability to act when the time arrives by doubt, needless, baseless doubt. Everything is moving for you, or it will be soon rather, and you have to trust that the Sunrise is just over the horizon

And there is a bigger picture here, you’re not only fulfilling your own desires, those longings serve a Greater purpose, do NOT doubt them, or their fulfillment.. And don’t trip yourself up when it doesn’t hit at the time that is most convenient for you. I said it would happen, I didn’t say it wouldn’t be a little messy, but messy is fun. All that being said, you want to bring in those nouns (people places things) that CAN make this happen, the most fertile possibilities that will be a part of the motion toward this. But, don’t think you’ll be the same, even in the same place when you’re done. You might not physically move, but unleashing desires, longed for moves us… Ever Towards...

Ta Da!

Hit me up with any questions! What a great Reading, I’m really happy for you and I’m excited to hear about your next few months!

-Frater N0VGHT

#magick #occult #thelema #tarot #divination #cartomancy

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illusionnatiletstalk · 3 years

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How do we see attraction as individuals?

Hi and welcome all you beautiful people, I hope you all having an awesome day, what is attraction? Attraction is a quality that causes an interest, desire in, or gravitation to something or someone. Now what attracts people to each other, let’s see good looks, ambition, and a good sense of humor are common qualities that people seek out. But there are other factors you're likely unaware of that play an important part in who you're attracted to. Past experiences, proximity, and biology all have a role in determining who catches our attention and who doesn't. So for now let’s look at physical attraction for the moment, As an individual what physical features do you find attractive in a person, and does society play a role in your decision making? What I mean by that is if you were alone in a room and given a book filled with pictures of different people who all had a different look to them, and asked to pick the person you found most attractive. While your choice being kept anonymous from anyone else, without having to worry about what other people would think or say, would your choice differ? Do other people and trends affect how we see physical attraction? Does looking at popular influence rs and all other celebrities affect how we see everyone else? Are certain body types and hair cuts we are attracted to influenced by social media and what is hot at that given time. Is physical attraction affected by what is trending? Rather than what we are attracted to as individuals, there are so many of us on this planet we all have a mind of our own and different likes and dislikes yet social media does affect our likes and dislikes in a large way it’s the indirect peer pressure of sorts. Life is so interesting and diverse to look at physical attraction in such a singular way is boring to me, to find someone attracted simply because they have a certain body shape, style, facial features or hair type is boring and untrue, or at least it is for me. Now as a guy sure I have certain tastes and likes, a type so to say but I don’t allow that to influence my views in who I find physically attracted, sure I might notice someone first or more if they are my type. But if I keep myself centered and open-minded I can find someone who is the complete opposite of my type attractive. Imagine if the world was limited to one or two colours how boring would that be, so limiting yourself to your type or certain features you are also limiting your possibilities and options, and who knows if you were just slightly more open-minded or truthful with your self you could have found the right person for you maybe even your true love if you believe in true love that is. But those are my thoughts on physical attraction, the most important thing to keep in mind is to be honest with your self, because you may live for society and trends but society can’t live for you, you have to live for your self so don’t let others or trends tell you something you should know for your self. How many times have I looked at someone without knowing a single thing about them or even hearing their voice and found them attractive even when they are not my type or have any trending features simply because I am honest with my likes and dislikes. No one is saying find everyone physically attractive because that’s not right either, just be honest and open-minded about it. Physical attraction is the easiest type of attraction as it requires no reason or value you either find someone attractive or not is a simple process that should not require any more steps than that, you just know.

Another type of attraction ambition perhaps the most controversial type of attraction, your needs and want’s in life and how you can get or achieve them from someone else. Now personally it’s an attraction I do not care for but I am me and not everyone else, whether attraction through ambition is a good thing or bad is not for me to decide but for the individual and the majority. Morally I think it's wrong simply because no one likes to be used, and most who do agree or practice attraction through their ambition, those who are attracted to someone because of their social power, financial power or even their corporate power. Would not want to be used in return or others to look at them for that reason so I find that very hypercritical, I do think living a life without hypocrisies is impossible but at the very least we can try our best to have as few hypocrisies in our lives as possible. To me being attracted to someone simply because of what they have is a very shallow way to live, it's like living life like a candle in the wind eventually that candle will blow out. Money does not last forever it can be lost at any time, someone’s social ladder can topple at any moment and no one works forever. It’s a temporary attraction that normally only has one winner at the end of it, it’s an attraction that does not need love or emotions or any other kind of attraction, it’s a stand-alone attraction and a lonely and selfish way to live. Haha maybe I shouldn't of given my opinion on that kind of attraction, my viewpoints on it are quite set in stone, but the reason for it is simply because eventually, it will cause someone pain or harm while benefiting the offender.

What about a good sense of humor, most of us have different views on comedy but pretty much all of us are capable of finding something funny, enjoying a good laugh, comedy puts a smile on most faces but again we are all different what someone finds funny someone else will not. So even if someone is considered to have a good sense of humor by most there will always be one or two people who don’t think so. So this type of attraction is complete up to the individual and to what they consider to be funny or not and also how much funny a person can take or want in a day. Some people might want someone who is a child all day long while others want someone who is cable of being funny but only at opportune moments, and is serious the rest of the time. So what is a good sense of humor well you already know the answer to that that’s something we each know and can tell apart from a bad one or at least what we consider bad. Because it’s all about considering what we like and don’t like, some people like childish humor, while others like dark, rude and lewd comedy. So going for someone who is a child all day when you can’t stand childish behavior is a recipe for disaster or a pan to the head. So when going for someone base on their personality make sure you like it or can handle it daily. Because unless that person is willing to change for you or adapt to your liking, it will more than likely end badly one day, even if that person fits all of your other attraction criteria. Then comes the questions if its okay to make someone change for you, as we are all individuals and should be allowed to be who we are, so to conclude that kind of attraction it’s tricky as nothing remains funny or acceptable forever and some can only handle so much humor a day so just be sure a person’s sense of humor is right and acceptable for you.

Now past experiences play a role in attraction as well there’s not much to talk about on this as we all have different backgrounds and different experience in life, but experience does affect attraction because certain good and bad experiences will tell us whether a certain type of person is good for us or not whether we choose to follow that experience or not is another thing entirely. Because so many of us keep ignoring that voice in our head that says no. If we have had a bad experience with a certain type of a person it could stop us from finding anyone else like or similar to that attractive and if we have had a good experience with a certain type of person we would normally look for someone else like that.

Proximity is another form of attraction we forget exists but truth be told seeing someone or talking to someone daily could affect or change how we see them, maybe if that person was just passing through or by we would not give them a second thought but constant exposure to them could grow small feelings into admiration or affection, or perhaps no feelings into something. Proximity also affects who we realistically look for most people look for someone who is close by or in the general vicinity, because most don’t like challenges, and finding someone abroad is difficult, its hard to get to know someone simply through text or a screen because we are never truly our selves in front of a screen or behind a text we always try to show the best versions of our selves and sometimes a fake one. But attraction by proximity does limit our options to our area and surroundings who knows the wonderful or perfect person for us we could be missing simply because we choose not to look outside our own little box. But still even while I think distance should never be a factor when looking for love or someone you are attracted to, you should always be four times as careful and always keep your eye and mind open till you meet the person in real life when there is no screen between you. And yes cost also plays a factor as travel is expensive and borders play a role, but like the saying goes love finds a way. Now being attracted to someone biologically, what does that mean while to me it means being influenced by individual genetics, psychological, or cultural factors, as well as Sexual attraction. This requires no explanation, well I just don’t have one, genetics, I am not a scientist so it means nothing to me, psychologically we are all different and different experiences and things that happen in our life will affect this, what kind of people we grew up with and what kind of people left lasting impressions on us will make us look for someone similar. Culture plays a very big role and breaks or makes a lot of relationships, it depends on how adaptable and accepting both parties are. If both are accepting or willing to adapt to the other culture then it stops being a problem but all it takes is one to be forceful and want the other to change to their way of life to ruin a relationship. So yes culture plays a big role in attraction if you are forced to change or accept things you don’t agree with, it’s a lot easier to accept someone like you than someone different, but to me, difference is beautiful and fun as long as I can be myself and not forced to change who I am, or what I think. Now sexual attraction I am not going to touch on simply because we all have our own kinks and what we like, plus I am not sure how deep I’ll go if I start pun intended, haha plus its something you should already know what you looking for and if you don’t you will with experience and lots of it.

#physical attraction #law of attraction #attraction #individual thought #individuals #how we see attraction #be an individual #be yourself #your thoughts matter #your choice matters

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evanbuckbuckley118 · 4 years

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Golf On TV (Songfic - Maddie x Chimney)

Hello everyone! This is my first fic for the 9-1-1 fandom, I appreciate all critiques!

Prompt received: “Hey. I noticed that you said you enjoy writing song fics. Could you write one based off of the song Golf on TV by Lennon Stella? Could you make it Madney centric?” (From @maddiehans)

Inspiration: The parts of this song that stand out to me are the themes of healing from past relationships, being confused at how things are in a new relationship because of previous learning experiences, and being confused about people’s tendencies. I took these three themes and tried to incorporate them into this fic!

Lyric: “Some people think it's supposed to hurt/Like it couldn't be real/If it's putting you first/But some people watch golf on TV/And neither of those things make sense to me”

Word Count: 1740

Cross-posted on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23604478

Dating Doug had taught Maddie a number of things. First, chivalry was dead - so there was no need to expect any kind gestures from her husband. Every gift or minuscule kindness Doug gave came with conditions, adding up to a score Maddie could never repay even if she dedicated a lifetime to doing so. There was also no room for Maddie to shine. Instead, in public she became the figure that stood behind Doug, hiding behind his shadow because that was where he made her feel as though she belonged. Due to this, Maddie had spent a good portion of her adulthood trying to shrink herself. The goal always became to hide, to disappear, to avoid any reason for punishment.

But then she met Howard.

It'd be a cliche to say everything changed, because it didn't really. Maddie still had remnants of the girl Doug had shaped her to be, but her growth was undeniable. She was attempting every day to learn her worth, and a lot of that was because of Howard’s encouragement.

Dating Howard forced Maddie to confront the pieces of her identity left behind after Doug. The way Howard insisted on opening her car door for her at her every entrance and exit confronted the belief that had been instilled in her that she wasn't allowed to have others put her before themselves. The way Howard seemed to only have eyes for her and refuse interest in women who made advances on him when they went out to karaoke made her wonder how Howard didn't find interest in having multiple partners, because prior to their marriage (and suspicions and threats during) Doug had always expressed interest in other women, pointing out the flaws in which Maddie didn't match up to his standards. The way Howard showed her off in public didn't make her feel like a piece of property being owned, but rather Howard showed her off with a pride and adoration that left Maddie floored. There was no reason or opportunity to hide when she was with Howard, and she wasn’t used to the spotlight after years of walking in Doug’s shadow.

Every aspect of dating the man known by the 118 as 'Chimney' was in direct opposition with everything Maddie had learned about love. There was a kindness, a patience, and a sense of equal footing and stability that were never present previously in her life. Howard never raised his hand (he hardly ever even raised his voice), he didn't treat everyday gestures as an constant adding score that had to be re-payed, he never pressured her many boundaries and treated the progression of their relationship with such patience, and he treated every person he met with endless compassion.

Maddie finds herself overwhelmed sometimes, and unable to fully express the honesty of the feelings she has for Chimney, even when she knows those indescribable feelings are reciprocated. These emotions were too foreign for her to find the words to properly describe, and she didn't want to use the kneejerk terms she'd used to defend herself in the past from her abusive husband. Doug always told her that a lesser man than himself would have left Maddie a long time ago because of her mannerisms. Yet, throughout everything, Chimney remained. It puzzles her on the best of days. There is a part of her that's been ingrained to feel unworthy of Chimney's love.

The intensity of these differences and her own feelings catches her off guard some days more than others. Like today.

Maddie had come over in the evening for their regular weekly date night. It was too easy to remember the nights that Maddie had previously spent alone slaving in front of a stove, struggling to make a quality dinner before Doug came home - but those nights were being rewritten in real time as Maddie and Chimney split the work of preparing dinner while recounting their work days and cracking jokes. There were no worries about the mess on the counters, or if the final outcome tasted less than spectacular. It was about time spent together, and there was nothing Maddie loved more than her time with Howard.

After dinner, the two of them traveled to the couch. Before they moved, Chimney had grabbed two glasses and a wine bottle from his cupboard. As he sat down, he looked over at Maddie with one hand under the bottle and another behind its neck, showing it off with a signature smile. "I figured we'd end the night with your favorite white wine," he stated, before attempting to pull out the cork.

Maddie attempted to tell him that pulling it out wasn't going to work, but was cut off by her own giggles. The cork remained stubbornly in place, certainly not for a lack of effort on Chim's part. She loved how tough Chimney was, but even his strength was no match for the task at hand.

He hung his head in defeat, and with a small laugh said "My apologies Maddie, I'm going to have to grab the corkscrew from the kitchen."

While Chimney rummaged in the kitchen, Maddie turned her eyes to the television. The television had been left on some sports channel since her arrival, possibly long before. The muffled sportscasters had been the soundtrack to their night, but the volume was so soft that Maddie had muted it in her mind during their previous conversations. "I didn't know you liked golf?" She questioned, not taking her eyes off the screen.

"Oh, yeah. I almost forgot that was on. I like watching the tournaments sometimes," Chimney lightly shouted from the kitchen, his voice just raised enough to reach across the distance without booming in the small square footage of the apartment.

Maddie pursed her lips. "Have you ever played yourself?"

Rounding the corner of the couch, he stepped in front of the coffee table to be able to pour the wine. "God no," he laughed. "This is a sport best left to professionals, I'd probably let go of the club mid-swing and cause an injury."

"But you still like to watch it?" Maddie questions.

Placing the bottle down, he wipes his hands on his dress pants before moving to sit down. It was endearing to Maddie how nervous he still felt around her, wanting to impress her, oblivious to how much he impresses her every minute just with his presence. "I know a lot of people think it is boring, but these guys sometimes play in grueling weather conditions for hours on end," Chimney explains while passing Maddie her filled glass. "The game is so competitive, every shot is crucial. Sometimes the players hit the bunker or the water, and that sucks. But, I think it's fascinating how they pull themselves out of their heads and shake it off. They continue to aim for that coveted hole in one. There is no greater excitement than that."

Maddie sipped her drink longingly, fascinated how this man can conceptualize such a deep life message out of what she considered to be one of the most boring games imaginable. "That's really beautiful Howie."

"We don't have to stay on it though-" Chimney started, leaning forward to grab the remote.

"-No, if you want to we can watch it-" Maddie interrupted, shifting herself to lean into his side as he leaned back again. She slotted herself under his arm, looping one of her own around his waist as she pillowed her head on his chest.

"-I don't want you to watch anything you don't want to watch," Chimney finishes with passion, passing the remote with a light grip over to Maddie.

Maddie couldn't help but tense. There had been nights with Doug where she'd criticized his viewing choices for the night, and ended up with a remote thrown at her temple in retaliation. The instances where she had gotten to choose their entertainment choice for the night were few and far between.

But as she looked up at Chim with confusion on her face, she realized while looking into Chim's eyes that his words and gesture were genuine. Maddie could only guess that the look in his eyes was adoration, still not having enough experience to trustingly label it as such. Chim's vocal tone and subtle handover of the remote weren't vicious in the way Doug's had often been. Instead, by saying that Maddie shouldn't watch something she didn't want to, what he was really saying was more generalized - he was saying you shouldn't be forced to do anything you don't want to.

And that's the true difference isn't it? Maddie is working hard on her recovery, but the hardest thing has been learning to ask for what she wants. She's spent so long being submissive to others that she's forgotten how to ask or take from others. Maddie knows that Chimney knows this, and probably knew it before even she could acknowledge that part of herself.

The truth is that Maddie does know what she wants. Pushing aside the selfishness and the realization that her growth does involve leaving the guilt her younger self would feel for taking what she wants behind, Maddie slowly pushes upwards to steal a kiss on his lips. She focuses on nothing else but cherishing the moment, while simultaneously breathing all the trust she has for Chimney into the kiss.

"The game is almost over anyway, we'll switch it after," Maddie compromises when they break. As she sinks back into his side, Chim slowly brushes one of her curls over her ear.

His classic smirk breaks across his face at her antics, knowing she wants to appease him as much as he wants to treasure her. "Sounds like a plan.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

After the night is through - there are two things Maddie still cannot understand about the men who have been in her life. With Doug, she cannot comprehend what part of him thought it would be okay to treat Maddie the way he did. With Chimney, she cannot comprehend why the man prefers to watch golf in his free time.

What she can understand is which of these issues she'd rather have to deal with, and which man she'd rather have by her side. This was the next chapter in Maddie’s fresh start, and if Chimney could put up with the remnants of her trauma - she could put up with his choice of television, regardless of how boring.

#911 fic #911 show #911 fox #911onfox #911 fanfic #madney #Maddie x chimney #chimney x maddie #evanbuckbuckley118 #fandomismymiddlename #fanfiction #fanfic #xv13

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barberwitch · 6 years

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Witch Tip Wednesday 10.24.18

Salve of Healing

So I wasn’t going to do a witch tip today because the Autumn Giveaway went live, but I had a few people message me about last night’s post. As I was typing a response I figured why not just make it an actual post and explanation?

So I made this based on my experiences with the ingredients, combinations and uses I grew up with. That’s the thing about folk medicine, the science parts catch up later, but if it works, it works. Keep in mind this isn’t meant as medical advice, just insight into my practice and culture.

Something else that I find deeply interesting is our relationship to plants and their folklore and history as medical treatments. They’re used by the common folk, and as science progresses, the magic changes to fact. Magic is just a process or phenomena that science hasn’t explained yet. As we move forward the mechanism of action is found out and able to be utilized to make stable medicines that don’t vary. With all that said, I decided to pull up some facts and figures from the science side of topical applications to give some credence to the balm.

This salve is for rashes, burns, bug it’s, minor cuts and abrasions.

Chamomile - when applied topically have a local anti-inflammatory effect. It has also been approved in some countries as an appropriate treatment for bacterial skin diseases. Has been used for treatment for respiratory tract inflammation, spasmolytic, and wound healing properties (Conplementary and Alternative Therapies and the Aging Population). From an aromatherapy point of view, calming effects without being overly perfumed. In witchcraft, chamomile is much the same as aromatherapy calling forth calming energy. Also has been used to cleanse spades and people of impurities, and inviting in tranquility and peace.

Lavender - has been credited with analgesic properties in reducing pain. Also a treatment for fungal infections and helping with anxiety. Useful for burns and bug bites, it has antiseptic and anti-inflammatory properties that in a study by the Evidence-Based Conolementary and Alternatice Medicine journal showed evidence lavender had an accelerator effect on wound healing. Aroma therapy, calms, soothes and helps with sleep.

Osha/Bear Root/Mountain Lovage - used in Latinx and Native American cultures for respiratory issues when taken internally (flue, pneumonia, coughs etc). Topical application has been used to prevent infection of skin wounds as an anti-microbial and antiviral protease inhibitor (additional research is being done for efficacy). Has a scent similar to celery, and only the root is used.

Aloe Vera - Used topically to accelerate wound healing. Decreases scar tissue size and development, moderates inflammation and has been used as an effective treatment for burns both related to application of heat and sun related skin damaged. Antioxidant rich compounds help to inhibit growth of harmful bacteria eg. Infection. Research is on going for its uses in maintaining and repairing elasticity in skin that may be worn down due to age or mechanical injury.

So that’s some of the info on the herbal components. The process is a simple one, I infused the dried herbs* in oil at room temperature in a sanitized jar for a few days, then put it in a pot of water for about 2 hours to further extract plant properties in jojoba oil. Then added organic beeswax until it solidified to a consistency that seemed appropriate/to taste? You pick the amount.

*I used dried aloe Vera from my garden because using fresh doesn’t infuse well into an oil due to water content. Additionally, the presence of water in an oil based infusion can lead to it growing mold, spoiling or going rancid.

I’ve explained in depth my reasoning behind using jojoba oil for salves and balms meant to absorb into skin before. (Granted that post is in relation to flying ointments, but still useful) I also only used oil and beeswax because the person this is for is vegetarian, so using my standard blend of animal fats and oil was a no go, so I had to increase both the amount of oil and beeswax to make a consistency appropriate.

Last little secret tip for making balms and salves. The amount of beeswax can be hard to measure because it has to be heated to melt the wax which in turn turns clear. Once it’s all melted, a simple way to test is to take a few drops and put on a piece of foil, pop into the freezer for about 5 minutes then touch. If it looses its shape immediately on contact, it will be about the consistency of half hardened coconut oil. You want to be able to pick up the drops and apply to your skin with the bottom of the drops (the parts touching your skin, instead of the part touching your finger) melting instead of the top. You may need to add more wax, or more oil until you get the hang of it and a grasp for consistency.

Last bit, I infused in a 2 oz container. About a tablespoon of chamomile, tablespoon of lavender, 4 inch piece of osha broken up, and another 4 inches of dried aloe vera cut up. Each batch is slightly different, and if this wasn’t meant to be used by someone under 10, I would add a drop or two of clove essential oil, some helichrysum and frankincense essential oils as well. At most, it would be 15 drops of essential oil in the whole 2 oz.

🦇Cheers, Barberwitch

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Original content of this blog is licensed under a Creative Commins Attributution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International license

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lightmywaytodawn · 5 years

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On the sleepng realm theory....

It points out some interesting things, but on the whole, I'm not finding myself on board with it.

I don't have an issue with people making far-fetched theories, and I think people are allowed freedom in expressing them. But I do feel that it also creates a bit of false hope, especially with how far spread this particular one went.

This isn't directed at anything or anyone, I just want to put my thoughts out there. Includes some ship talk.

First, things I did find interesting. One was Kairi's hoodie. The whole time I actually thought they were panda ears as I didn't look closely enough to notice the drooped shape. Whether it actually has meaning, I don't know, but the ears are indeed Chirithy-shaped.

KH3 did at its very core feels odd. But whether that’s just a case of bad writing, or some ridiculously convoluted bs-plotline going on in the background, is another matter.

I will admit they clearly put a lot of thought and effort into the theory. The dedication to write that much and find screenshots and gifs of all scenes in question must have taken a lot of time. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that over-analyzing every small detail is a good thing.

My biggest issue is on the things that they really reach for, especially regarding Kairi’s scenes. Saying that she didn’t take a bite of the paopu fruit, or that the scenes aren’t romantic-coded is cherry picking. I also have serious contention with her being labeled as “not the real Kairi”, as she already gets shafted by the writing staff enough without that. I flat out don’t like Sora and Kairi in a romantic relationship--but KH3 has made it explicitly clear that they are endgame. The signs have been there since KH1. While I do think the whole thing regarding her heart missing raises a lot of questions, I can’t bring myself to agree that they’ve gone through the same scenario x amount of times. Time loop has been done a million times before, and very, very few series have actually made it worthwhile. As convoluted as KH already is, this is one route I really don’t want it to take. Time traveling as it is is messy enough, and if Nomura really goes for time loop, then I really might quit.

The writers also seem to be writing off the fact that only Dream Eaters can appear in the Sleeping Realm. They also seem to be confusing the Datascape of KHUx with it, or mixing them to create an entirely unheard of Realm altogether. Any response I see in question to that evades really answering the question. Though by far the most reaching part might very well be the logo. I can’t see it as anything but a diagonal gradient.

The whole doc also reads from a shipper bias. Which is not something I think is particularly bad, and you can never hide your biases 100%. But when it comes to the fact that they’re very clearly downplaying Sora and Kairi scenes, while overanalyzing every Riku and Sora scene, it comes off more as a disappointment with what they were given. While I won’t defend Sora and Kairi’s relationship, since she’s off screen 95% of the time and never given a chance to actually gain natural development with him, it’s just silly to go and say that those scenes had no romantic intent. I’ve seen both the JP and Eng version, and based on cultural nuances, I don’t think those scenes were intended as friendship or parting. They were clearly wrapping up the romantic sub-plot that’s happened since KH1. Hand-holding in particular is a much bigger thing in Japan than it is in the West.

I will admit that JP->Eng translation for some scenes on Riku’s part came off with less impact. Japanese however is a very contextual language, and the same word can be translated multiple ways depending purely on context. The one that comes up in the document most is 大切な人. Essentially meaning, someone precious. For it to be translated on Hercules side as the one he loves most makes sense, because we all know Hercules and Meg’s relationship is romantic, and the West in general writes far more openly romantic than Japan does. While I didn’t like how it was translated on Riku’s side, using “important/precious person” over “true love” still would have made more sense. Again with the Elsa and Anna mirrors. The intent was familial love. I do wish they had translated the 俺は信じる、お前はあきらめない part more accurately, as it does show his faith in Sora better.

And this brings me to the false hope part. Kingdom Hearts is, for all intents and purposes, a Japanese game made by middle-aged Japanese men, and co-owned by Disney. Even if I could argue that Riku maybe has one-sided feelings for Sora, if you expect the game devs to ever confirm something to that extent, then you’re barking up the wrong tree. And this is from the point of view for someone who has shipped them for 13 years of my life. Because yes, they have a really well developed relationship, due to the amount of focus both characters get in each game. But I knew deep down since KH1 that it would never go anywhere. I accepted it long ago. Yet now I’m seeing people gain hope from this doc that maybe it still has a canon chance, and this is what I feel is disingenuous to the fandom. I don’t want to see others get their hopes up for future installments only to end up getting hurt.

I want to be clear that I won’t stop shipping them just because my ship sunk in canon. And I won’t say I’m okay with it either. At first I shrugged it off, but it kind of hit much later on that I wasn’t really ready to see it happen. The writers of the doc seem to be dealing with escapism. Which is fine, you don’t have to accept canon, but that they or others who’ve read the theory seem to aggressively be pushing it, is what puts a bad taste in my mouth.

They also give Nomura a lot of credit for things he’s pulled out of his ass for the past 17 years to keep the series going. And I’m just personally not a fan of the whole “it was all a dream”. I feel that to say that for a game people waited so long for is a low blow to the fans. At least in DDD, the dream instances were obvious from the start, and Riku had the big glowing Dream Eater sigil on his back. It wasn’t using hidden or trick narrative--it was stupidly simple, and in plain sight. Which is what a lot of KH is, under the surface--stupidly simple. Just told in an overly convoluted, pointlessly roundabout way.

I also fail to see how anyone can take Yozora as anything but Nomura’s salt about Noctis and Versus. How his salt affected KH3 though is a topic for another time.

Either way... people are free to believe what they want, and support what they want. But I can’t in good faith tell people to have hope that Riku and Sora would ever become a canon couple. Not with my extensive experience with Japanese media.

#kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts 3 #kh3 spoilers #theories

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folerdetdufoler · 5 years

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sunday was like…a half day. i woke up for breakfast but then went back to bed. i went back through my tweets and apparently i was woken up in the middle of the night by girls being loud in the hallway, so maybe i was just trying to sleep off my grumpiness. i didn’t wake up again until housekeeping came by, and that was enough to knock me out of heaven (bed).

i went to meet haidee at KB for second breakfast. it was one of my grosser walks, because it was raining and warm out, so i was either getting wet from the outside or sweating through my layers on the inside. on top of literally dripping on my stool at the cafe, i was trying to save a seat for haidee too, and that was making me sweat double time because i always feel like no one believes me when i say “i have a friend coming.” like, i have friends? really? hmmm. anyway, she arrived and we got caught up.

and phew, i thought my saturday was rough with all of the walking? haidee’s saturday, starting late friday night, was…not good. ugh. i felt so bad that she went through so much, and that i couldn’t be there to help fix it or let her escape from it. it’s frustrating that she was subjected to a lot of very bad decisions made by other people, and doubly so that my first instinct was to try to fix it, even though none of it was my fault. i wanted to publicly rant on her behalf, shame others for their bad behavior, but that wasn’t going to fix anything either, so we just unloaded and commiserated for a few hours, and tried our best to figure out how to handle that sort of thing going forward. in the very least, it was good to talk, rather than let the disappointment fester in silence.

since i was in the neighborhood i had wanted to make a quick stop at nissen to see the bench in the light, and make haidee take another picture on the bench with me. but siv actually walked into the cafe and chatted with us briefly, explaining that the convention was still running late and the safaris hadn’t wrapped up at the school on time. i was relieved then that i hadn’t dragged haidee up there, nor gone on my own, so we stayed inside and waited for her other friend (i want to call her vee but i also know that that is wrong) to arrive. i ordered an iced mocha and cinnamon roll, which, because i’m obsessed with myself, seemed cute since it was isak’s regular order in mondays. i started drinking iced mochas when i kept seeing kaylee rave about them, so that’s what made me choose it for isak, and a cinnamon bun is a cinnamon bun. [bread pun]

at some point nadège was walking past with her tour group and she ran up to knock on the window and in that moment i understood how isak was feeling right here:

haidee’s friend showed up and we all crowded into isak’s window for a bit. then i excused myself to go meet jenn in grünerløkka. i can’t remember who told me about it first, whether it was mo back in january or haidee in june, but retrolykke came highly recommended, so we met there. on the barista’s recommendation jenn had tea and i had water, because my “caffeine headache” wasn’t going away so i was probably just dehydrated. we sat outside because it was still kind of warm and i’m glad we did because i probably would’ve spent all of my money if we were sat anywhere near a shelf in that joint. we traded stories about our saturdays and i got the run down on the movie i missed. then, unable to hide it any longer, i let loose my deep desire to ride the ferris wheel at the christmas market. maybe i played it cool, but that’s unlikely. we had a small window before we had to meet haidee for dinner, so we cleaned up and zipped over there.

cheers to the people who let you indulge in your secret wishes, who help you buy a ticket and climb into the bucket with you. cheers to the young girls in our bucket (is there a different word for it? gondola? whatever. it felt like a bucket swinging from a giant’s hand) who probably thought we were weird but weren’t too afraid to ask jenn to take their picture. cheers to oslo and its shit weather, which it still wore beautifully. this bitch looks great from any angle.

after the ride we wandered around the market because haidee reported her event was (newsflash) running late and they were still waiting outside. i was getting another low, so i had to stop to get something to eat. what i should’ve done was just stop and chomp some tablets, but my mind was foggy and i was with someone else so i was like obviously we need to get gløgg first. i stared down the candy apples by the register, which would’ve been the next smartest choice for fast-acting sugar, but i ordered a goddamn pølse instead, and we proceeded to make dick jokes for another fifteen minutes while i housed it in like, five bites.

now, i need to explain something that i think has just been rolling around in the back of my mind since february, but i’m mildly obsessed with the idea of pølse as a party food, a common snack. i don’t know why, of all the norwegian things i’ve encountered, this sticks out for me, because…it’s a hot dog. americans eat hot dogs all the time. it is not an unfamiliar concept. but after seeing marlon eating one at the club i’ve projected that onto every possible party situation in my head, from a tiny gathering in a home to a giant dance floor with lasers shooting out across a crowd. and it just makes me laugh? and i feel like i need to explain why or how, but i actually can’t. just…dick jokes aside, ordering a hot dog was funny to me, and i wanted to experience that hot-dog-in-da-club feeling, so maybe that’s why i went with protein and slow carbs instead of straight sugar. i prioritized my sense of humor over my health, and while it was dumb it made me laugh and tasted good. that doesn’t explain my obsession with pølse but i think it tells you a lot about me.

okay so after that…we took shelter in a KB because it was still raining and we were still waiting and i was still low. then i finally got smart and started eating my tablets. we made our way over to ett bord where we were picking up haidee, but they were still finishing up. jenn sat at the table outside and narrated what was going on inside because i refused to turn around. i was hoping, like a child who hadn’t learned what object permanence was, that if i didn’t see anything, then nothing was happening. or if the people inside didn’t see me, then i didn’t exist. but i don’t think it worked. ragnar came out to say hi to jenn, and that was cool to see him again. we scooped nadège and haidee and i tried to escape unseen, but fuck…like a minute later we ran into three italians and walked with them up to the intersection. that’s what the blurry photo is, nadège and rocco, federico and jenn in front of them. at that point i was ready to just give up, because like, of course i was going to intersect with these people eventually. i was literally visiting places related to the show and convention. i don’t know why i thought it was avoidable, why i had shaped my trip around trying not to see these people, while also putting myself directly in their line of fire. i’d met henrik and lisa and there were the italians and i had a goodie bag in my backpack and you probably wouldn’t actually believe me at this point if i said i didn’t attend the convention. my desire and my shame shuttled me around the city, working together, telling me you can’t have your cake and eat it too. so i took a picture of it.

i was able to relax though, through dinner with jenn and haidee at olivia. we ended up at the wrong location (tjulvhomen instead of aker brygge) because i decided to ignore jenn’s directions (nice) but they were pretty empty so we just stayed. since i had already caught up with both of them i took this opportunity to let them talk to each other, which left me free to shove every strand of linguini known to man into my face. you only get a photo of my dessert, which marks the first point in time that i stopped eating long enough to actually take a picture.

it was interesting talking to both of them about the movie because they were literally in the same room, watching the same thing, but had such different interpretations and responses to it. on top of that, being in a room filled with the skam fandom must have shaped their viewing as well. even though i didn’t experience any of it, the discussion alone was a great reminder of the variety of perspectives in the fandom and what happens when a fandom is the lens through which you view the world.

we of course talked about skam and fandom, but we also got to talk about our personal lives a bit more, and i think this was the first time i was in a completely non-skam-related place, which seemed to free us a bit from reference points that kept your subconscious attached to the show or cast (at least it did for me). i had spent my day avoiding it, and but now i was actually distanced from it without any effort, and it felt like a really positive development. especially as i’m attempting to be a better person in general, able to establish and maintain relationships that aren’t based precariously on a singular, mutual fixation. i want to be able to be friends with people because they’re good people and a joy to be around, not just because there’s this one thing we can talk about. now here’s a joke line because i always undercut my serious emotions with humor: look ma, we talked about something else!

then jenn had to get to a party, so we had another navigational ~experience~. we dropped her off there and haidee and i decided to head home. our days were short but like, emotionally very long, so we were done. that didn’t stop us from standing on the sidewalk in the rain, talking for another hour though. we kept hugging to say goodbye and then talking some more and hugging again and talking and ok for the last time now because there are puddles inside my shoes kiss kiss squeeze i’m not crying it’s the rain i swear. i’ll see you in september, okay? promise.

i finished the day as it started, with a very wet walk. the market was empty, so i let myself take the kinds of photos that i am too embarrassed to take in public, the ones where you stand wherever you’d like for optimal angles and don’t care about anyone else around you, don’t worry about being in their way, or worry that they can tell how many pictures you’re taking, or worry that they’re judging how poorly your shots are turning out. ugh, it’s amazing that i can function as a tourist full stop. please sir, would you mind emptying out the city so i may experience it without the anxiety of my human existence? tusen takk.

whatever. i got to the hotel, asked for a new room key (at some point that evening i lost my room key and my ruter card, rip), returned to heaven (bed) and promptly shit my pants again when i saw the announcement on twitter about the bloopers.

the motherfucking bloopers. the man, the myth, the legend. the rumors were true.

#for the record i have never literally shit my pants #i have a 100% success rate with using a toilet #but it's the only turn of phrase i can think of when i try to describe my very physical uncontrollable reaction to certain things #like what is this #what is happening #am i shitting my pants #or am i just so obsessed with a show that the mere hint of news causes me to lose control of my bodily functions?#kerryinoslo

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yeastofeden · 6 years

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Hello! Your Traitor Uraraka theory was an amazing read! I want to dive into the world of character/story/literary analysis too, but I dont know where or how to start... Any advice/tips you could share?

Thanks so much! I’m honestly flattered you would ask… I’m ahobby writer so a lot of what I know about analysis is what I learnedin grade school, on my own, or adapted from what I know about artcriticism & analysis….. Since you’re not sure on the start,I’ll just talk about all the core things I feel helped me getinterested in this.

Read If I had torecommend anything specificfor reading, I’d say lookinto classic literature – not because its “critically acclaimed,”but because a lot of the time classic literature has been analyzed byprofessionals in their fields, so it can be a nice way to see howother people handle character interpretation, storytelling, worldbuilding, and so on. I liked Shakespeare a lot, and you probablywouldn’t be surprised to hear that people analyze the shit out ofShakespeare. I probably picked up the most of my understanding ofcharacter analysis from indulging in Shakespeare alone.

Don’t like Shakespeare? I’d say look into stories that are just over 50 years old; Lord ofthe Rings, Catcher in the Rye, Pride & Prejudice, Lord of theFlies…. So long as you can find actual scholars analyzing it,you’re golden. Read things you enjoy; if you like anime and only care about that…maybe check out textbooks on classic anime.

Alongwith looking up how others analyze, start being critical with all themedia you consume. Movies are a great way to do this because it’sshort format and easyconcumption. You can stayfocused on critical thinking for a couple of hours while enjoyingsomething–I also think movie reviews are a good way to experiencecritical analysis. And don’t just watch good movies… watch badones too, and figure out why they’re bad.

WriteActuallywrite. Take all the interesting things you learned and apply it tosomething. Don’t just think about it; the tragedy about onlythinking is that nothing really solidifies like it does once youfinally put it out there. Talkto friends about it if you can drag them into aconversation;a lot of my analysis started out because I was talking with otherpeople. If you don’t have anyone to talk to about a series or don’twant to bother people with your miscellaneous thoughts, get a sidetumblr or a dreamwidth and just write things there to get themdown–ifyou’reshy, just don’t tag things.Tbh, sometimes I just write things out and then delete them when I’mfinished just so I can get the thought out of me. Writing is just apowerful tool tohelp organize thoughts into cohesive opinions.

Butdon’t just write thoughts only… build on them. Write your owncharacters and stories just for fun. Write fanfiction. WriteAlternate Universes. Really just explore your own taste in fictionand the kind of things you yourself want to see. If there’s onevery easy thing I could suggest… take your favourite characters orship and slap them into story that already exists. I wrote one of myOTPs a few years ago into HasChristian Andersen’s theLittle Mermaid,andit was interesting andfuntrying to suit different characters into the roles of the story.

Writingand reading as a combination are just good things for you; they helpbuild competency with literature and language, andby just indulging in the two of these while remaining critical canjust naturally better your ability to read deeper into things.

ResearchAlongwith the earlier mentioned analyses that you should look into, it’sworth it to look into like extra resources. Check out interviews withyour favourite authors; look at like Ted Talks about creativity andwriting; read into tropes and motifs; find creative people you likeand follow their work and look for trends; lookinto writing concepts and themes.Storiesare just made up of patterns and once you start finding the patterns,you can start exploiting them. A Hero’s Journey is one of the mostfundamental patterns we can follow in storytelling, and with someabstract thinking we can start to predict the events that will occurin a story. A lot of my theory is built up on observing patterns.

IfI could point you toward one single video, it’s Kirby Ferguson’sTED talk “Embrace the Remix.” It talks about the idea thatnothing is original and all things are just remixed versions of eachother. This is part of why tropes exist; you could go look attvtropes.org and hit random and start learning about these patternsright now. Granted, I don’t recommend using tropes as a foundationof an argument, but knowing tropes can help you connect the dotsbetween series.

IfI had to suggest any non-literary research that’s worth lookinginto….Check out psychology, art, and/or culture. Psychology is just morepatterns, I use Maslow’s Heirarchy of Needs when I write andobserve survival horror. Art is another way to tell a story and isespecially useful when observing visual media. Culture can help youunderstand why people write the way they do, becausethere is a difference between Eastern and Western media andstorytelling trends.

“Personality sections”Alittle back story on me: pretty much all of thereading/writing/researching I do thesedaysis because I do a lot of text-based roleplay on Dreamwidth. I’vebeen doing this for about8 years.Overthe years, I’ve written out easilyover 30 “personality sections,” which are basically 500-2kcharacter summaries–for characters like Sakura from Naruto, Makotofrom Free, Jake English from Homestuck, and so many others–as apart of a way to “prove” that I understand the character I’mroleplaying whenjoining organized groups.I’ve also read literallyhundredsof these personality sections because I joined vetting teams forsaid organized groups, and have written many rejectionresponses to help people understand where they can improve.A lot of people I know hate writingthese personality sections… but I love them.

Youcould join RP and get a feel for it thesame wayI did, but that might not be your thing. But the process of writingthese “personality sections” wasbroken down to a science byroleplayers,and can be seen as a base form of character analysis. Wetalkedabout a character’s personality, what shaped them to be that way,and sometimes how that affected them in the future of their story.When I led a vetting team, these were the requirements I set:

Mustbe at least three paragraphs long for minor characters, fiveparagraphs long for main characters. Players should be able to conveya good understanding of their characters, but just describing apersonality isn’t enough. Make sure that when you explain aparticular attitude that you back yourself up with some canon proof,otherwise mods have to wonder where you are getting this informationregardless of our knowledge of canon. Be sure to explain clearly andconcisely, organizing your paragraphs so related subjects aretogether. Avoid explaining the personality in such a way that itreads like a history section - generally this is determined byunnecessary use of chronological order.

Andthese are the same guidelines I hold myself to when I work on my ownpersonality sections. Some people have broken down personalitysections in such a way that they are formatted “three positivetraits, three negative traits” withsome variance.Some like to talk about important relationships aswell.I always defend that personality should be backed up with actualcanon evidence. “Uraraka is kind,” I could say, but I should backit up with an instance where she showed kindness, such as when shesaved Midoriya from tripping when they first meet.

TheorizingIfI’m honest, I don’t much like theorizing. I like to read theoriesand I like to think about things, but I’m not actually partial totrying to predict the future of a series because I feel likeserialized stories are too choppy to be worth my time, and there’snot much sense trying to predict the future of a story that’sfinished. I’m more inclined toward theorizing about the past, orwhat’s already happened but wasn’t explained.

Mydisinterest in theorizing kind of shows….I’ve only written twotheories for Tumblr–Urarakais the Traitor (My Hero Academia), and Both Shiros are the Clone(Voltron). I think I ended up being right about the second one butI’m not sure where the interview isthatproves it, justthat it was SDCC stuff.Thereason I’ve written any theories at all is because I personally wasmotivated by frustration–I didn’t know why people weren’ttalking about these things. SoI made a post to try to get people to talk. BeforeI posted my theory, no one would have looked twice at Uraraka andthat drove me nuts.Now I’ve made a following strong enough that Uraraka seems to beone of the highest contenders in terms of just… gossip. Which,thanks guys. I’m floored.

So…. Myadvice would be to pick a subject you think should be talked aboutand go for it. Do the research. Canon-review. Takenotes. Search for patterns outside what you’re trying to analyze.Writeand rewrite and rewrite again, becauseanalyzing is basically high school but fun.

And…lastly…. Prepare to be wrong. You have a different sense ofstorytelling than anyone else. I have been bitten right in the assbecause I viewed and loved many-a character because I saw them theway I wanted to, and the author clearly did not share my views.And people might not like your theory; people might super hate iteven, and that’s not such a big deal. In the end it’s just fiction and we’re all just here to enjoy a story we love.

I…know that’s a lot, but Ihope it was at least helpful information! Ithink in the end the most important part is just to be critical andremain open-minded. Never stop learning. Choose your battles. Write about what you love.And don’t worry so much about being wrong.

#Anonymous #literature #by me

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uiuxstudioblog · 3 years

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The 10 Principles Of UX Design Psychology You Must Know

The psychology of UX design plays an important role in the user experience. You will need to know how to record our designs. We are improving the design to get more impressive results in achieving our users' goals.

Wikipedia states that user experience (UX) is a person's emotions and attitudes when using a particular product, system, or service. It includes a person's perception of usefulness, ease of use, and efficiency.

UX designers read people's hearts, understand their needs, and develop products that meet those needs. It helps to know the user's perception. The psychology of UX design plays an important role in creating attractive designs for multiple clients.

When UI-UX design uses this psychology in design, it comes with a creative and perfect design. Therefore, for a successful user experience, UI-UX design companies need to consider who will use it and apply their knowledge of UX design psychology.

Principles Of UX Design Psychology

There are many ways to create attractive designs for your website or app. Here, we will explain the main psychology of UX design so that UX designers can create attractive websites.

Hick’s Law

This shows the time related to the number of bumps and the complexity of the options presented to the user. It gave users choices to help them make decisions. Let's take a brief look at an example of a restaurant with a long and great menu.

If you have a lot of items on the restaurant menu, you have to read all the options and it will take much longer to decide, but if you have a few items it will be easier to choose. The same thing happens when designing an interface.

With UX design, if you want your users to experience the product comfortably, try reducing the number of choices you offer. User surveys are the most reliable way to identify these key features to include in your design.

Hick's design rules also relate to how information architecture is organized. It's always best to specify a wide range of categories and then classify them into subcategories. Wherever a long list shortens it, you have fewer choices.

A good example of this is splitting the checkout process into many screens such as shopping cart> delivery details> payment information> send. Another way to incorporate Hick's Law is to suggest options to users rather than confuse them with tastes. The latest onboarding is a special way to reduce the meaningful burden for new users.

Gestalt Principles

Often, our approach is controlled by how we look at an object and associate it with a particular object based on distance. Our brain ignores organizational gaps, contradictions, or confusion.

UI UX The most common principle of design psychology is the visual design principle. It shows how the human eye perceives visual elements and explains how the eye distinguishes shapes as a single shape rather than as individual elements. This is a good example of how psychological design works together. It also explains how viewers can group objects together and view them as a whole.

The principles of Gestalt theory explain into six categories:

Similarity

The human eye always establishes relationships between related elements of design. When using key elements such as shape, color, and size convincingly.

Continuation

The human eye recognizes design paths, lines, and curves. The user's eyes are adjusted to see the constant movement of visual factors, preferably separate objects.

Closure

The human eye prefers to see the perfect shape and fill the gap. If the visual element is not perfect, the user can perceive the complete form by stretching the missing information.

Proximity

These simple shapes are organized together to create a more complex image. If the factors are close to each other and fixed, they are shown as a group. Near the sloping lines connect them to one image.

Figure/Ground

The user distinguishes between the object (figure) and its surroundings (floor). You can easily switch between them to explore different images. The human eye obscures the shape of the background.

Symmetry and order

The design should be stable and complete. The user's brain automatically spends time and effort identifying comprehensive images.

It Helps make your design more creative.

Von Restorff Effect

The Von Restorff effect is also popular as a separate effect that closes when there are several identical objects that other objects are likely to recognize from other objects.

It states that something unusual is easier to know than normal. This style has a unique look, context, or experience that helps you create a design with an outstanding experience for your users.

The CTA is an important design element that makes it easy for users to handle what they see. Pay attention to various details such as images, fonts, colors, sizes, words, sounds, animations, and more. Effective use of these details is impressive.

Psychology of Colors

Color psychology is the science of how color affects human performance. We can see the color perfectly with both eyes. Together, our brains explain what we see in color images.

Associated with emotions and opinions that are also used as marketing tools in various industries. According to a survey, up to 80% of users believe that color enhances brand awareness. You can easily identify your target audience when deciding on a website color and brand. It aims to increase the productivity of brand-related design and emotions.

Cognitive psychology studies show that the more comfortable the product, the more useful and recognizable it is. This is known as an aesthetic usability effect, as positive emotions and attractiveness are associated with higher quality. For attractive aesthetics, people ignore usability issues.

The primary features of each color such as

Blue shows strong, honest, calmness, reliability, secure. Many corporate organizations use blue to reveal a neutral feeling of reliability, such as Facebook’s blue color scheme, to communicate to users that it is a secure social network.

Red color red tells us about energy, love, excitement, action, boldness, and passion. The best example of red color is Coca- Cola. It uses red in a classy way to communicate to users that the product is very energetic.

Orange tells us about happiness, sociability, friendliness, affordability, enthusiasm. It is used to attract attention and is considered a color of enthusiasm such as Nickelodeon children's channel uses orange in their brand to give the idea of a happy, playful environment.

Yellow color shows logical, optimistic, forward-thinking, confident, playful details. It excites our mental capacities, uplifting feelings, and cheerfulness, and it is the most highly visible of all colors.

Pink is famous for being feminine, passionate, youthful, fun, gentle, nurturing. It is a mixture of effective red softened with the purity of white. It shows love matched with excitement.

Purple shows imagination, creativity, nostalgia, royalty, spirituality. It excites the imagination, bringing emotions, the strength of red in combination with the spirituality of blue.

Green shows growth, organic, natural, freshness, stability, positivity, comfort. It is a stable color that is engaged with natural existence in our environment. Companies use green in their color scheme for the association with its nature and freshness.

Brown tells us about earthy, simple, security, and protection. It is a down-to-earth color that symbolizes structure and stability and feelings of friendliness and loyalty.

Black always shows sophistication, luxury, seductive, formal authority, strength. High-end brands mostly used it to illustrate their sophistication, luxurious products, and services.

White shows simplicity, purity, light, innocence, goodness. It is the lightest color, also known as the most complete and pure.

Multi-color tells us about multi-channel, positive, playful, bold, boundless, diversity.

The companies with multiple colors suggest they present a vast choice of products and services such as Google.

Mental Models

We built a mental model from the user experience and the real world view. We know that people always have a mental model for connecting to objects and systems.

Today, as people spend more time online, users have developed a mental model of how to build relationships and what to look for in an interface. If the design or functionality of the products does not match these mental models, users will find it difficult to use these products.

people want easy navigation, communication, and terminology when searching for products. The best example of these, B. Users need extensive navigation to return to the site logo at the top of the home page.

There are many ways to understand a user's mental model. B. Usability testing, task analysis, interviews, observations. UX Designer wants to provide users with an efficient online experience and use mental models in their projects for best results.

Pareto Principle

This is a very famous law, also known as the Pareto principle or the 80/20 rule or a few important laws. This principle shows that 20% of the work is done to get 80% of the results. They also made fewer settings to get a lot of positive changes.

To have a strong impact on the rest of the design, you need to focus on 20% of the design. When time and skill are available, UX designers focus on small parts of the design to create the best user experience and make the best impression on the user.

You can analyze the design function to create an 80/20 focused on fewer elements for maximum accuracy and conversion with less effort.

Psychology of Shapes

We know that the subconscious mind reacts to shapes by associating them with the features that represent them.

These associations are not concrete and are formed from relationships that oppose them. You will see a red octagon known worldwide as a stop sign. Brands use different shapes in multiple colors to compose their logo. These visual factors create an emotional connection with the brand. The most common shapes used in the design are:

Circles, Ovals, Ellipses

We know that the round shape is understood as a feminine quality and, like the Audi and Pepsi logos, produces certain emotional messages that suggest community, relationships, and unity.

Squares & Triangles

The straight edge logo conveys stability, strength, professionalism, and efficiency. We associate the triangle with force and its connection to science, religion, and law. Consider these forms as dynamic quality.

Vertical Lines

They connect vertical lines in logos such as Cisco or SoundCloud with power, strength, and aggression.

Horizontal Lines

It connected horizontal lines with association, equality, tranquility, calmness in logos such as AT&T or Human Rights Campaign.

These factors are crucial in UX design psychology and provide the best designs.

Fitts Law

It suggests the size of the target and the time it takes to travel to the destination area of the distance to the target.

The target button joins mouse parts or opens in a short interaction time. Action time is essential in web design as it affects conversion rates.

Like the menu bar on the Apple MacBook, the improved link size when changing elements is good for developing usability indexes. Use this rule for unwanted actions such as removing buttons or reducing the target size.

Visceral Reactions Law

When we see any attractive website & not want to leave because of its engaging designs. We know this feeling as a visceral reaction. It is a natural reply to the experience generated by chemical messengers in our brain. The eliciting visceral reactions in design keep our visitors coming back for more.

Users create a split-second choice about how they think about a specific design as they look at it. Gaining a visceral reaction from users develops a special behavior that helps to gain their loyalty and support. It helps to generate a larger image for your brand.

Using simple design details such as fonts, colors, imagery, and icons determines the complete feel of the site. People feel relaxed with things they refer to, creating a novel experience to manage an underlying understanding.

Limitations Of Memory

We know that memories are not always sharp. Our thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and environment create the resources we store.

Many types of studies show that people create false memories of remembering what isn't happening or taking different perspectives.

It is appropriate to create a design based on brain habits and mental models.

UI UX Design Agency designs websites or apps to assist users and create the best user experience based on their perception. Users know that they don't remember all the details of a page, so they post important information on every page. It's a good idea to come up with a custom design so that users can easily remember and return to the website.

Wrap Up

UIUX Studio provides services for years and works on multiple projects worldwide. We always give preference to UI UX design psychology in our design projects to fulfill our client's business goals to enhance user relations.

Our UI UX designer takes the influence of psychological principles to create a smooth user experience to increase conversion rates and user experience.

Hire UX Design Agency for various design projects because they use psychology principles in designs for timeless solutions.

Go on with our experts on Skype for more details of UX design projects.

#UX Design Psychology #Psychology in UX design #UI UX Design Psychology #Psychology of UX design

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allabouteducation21 · 3 years

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DIMENSION OF SELF: SOCIAL

The Cultural Self

- “The more we consider each individual inside a society, we influence them and practice the way culture build us.”

Welcome again to our session. Today, we will tackle about the first part of Social Self which is the Cultural Self. The culture aspect inside the society have a lot of perspectives that determines our own self. Like the way we observe a person, the way we act to others and the way we accept our self. Influence is the word that describes the culture because of it we already adapt the system of that influence. For example, the culture of one country is K-pop music therefore because of Globalization and Social media we already view and sometimes we don't know that we love the taste of their culture. Sometimes, it is the attitude that we adapt because of differences once we practice it inside the society, many individuals will practice and pass it to other individuals.

- I have personal experience about cultural self which I can illustrate that inside my community, we build interaction and communication. As long as we united and keep in touch to the culture we practice everyday, no one will not understand the way we socialize to individuals. Also, the beliefs like there was a time that its Holy week and the community are aware that there are set of elder women who read the some parts of Bible (Pabasa) and the individuals joined them and the traditional way to practice it is to keep the culture alive within the society. Also, I encounter some individuals that are Introvert and I tell that were good friends now as well. I manage to influence them how they will act if the person want to talk to them or socialize with them and that kind of action or interaction is the best way to do. It can also include the beauty standards that can be judge by individual in every society or countries. There's some basis of it because cultural aspect but nowadays we see that whatever skin color, countenance of individual, social roles and even body shape have a unique standard in society and that is the 21st century cultural standard but there's still issue about discrimination and racism. As it this goes on and on, the consistency of acceptance of every individual inside the society will be better.

Socio-Digital Self

- "The way we see social media is important, it is good to see that it is a communication platform were we connected to our self and to others."

Last time, we've discussed the Digital Self which has a relationship to socio-digital self. The post-modern times hit us in advance technology where communication is easy to input in our smartphones. There's a lot of application has been invented by individuals and because of this global revolution billions of people use technology and social media platform everyday. This second part of dimension self will talks about the lifestyle of every individual inside the society whether all of our industries are focusing in accessibility of science and technology and most of individuals including me affect a lot of this phenomena. Actually, there are also issues evolving and pertaining to digital self including cyber bullying, hacking a personal information and scam. Also, the advantage and disadvantages of social media platform to our physical, emotional and mental aspect.

- Based on my personal experiences, a wide social media influence me that is absolutely benefited me on my everyday agendas. Like were in the midst on pandemic and our education system is on a situation of flexible learning, where most of the students learning process are focus on online class platform. As I've experiencing struggles in terms of this new normal, I seemingly realize that social media is above anything else right now just simply opening an application from my smartphone. A lot of information, news and updates our society and also it helps me on my research, assignments, advance reading and other school works by searching something in Google. There's a lot of details allotted on different platforms but in some cases we detect viruses or even I witness some cases of individuals who are a victim of scam and cyber bullying and it happens all the way. Well, to stop this kind of phenomena we must be responsible in many ways. We must not to judge an individual and we must know our limitations to that. We're lucky to know our identity inside the society and we admired socialization inside social media platform but at least we know how to handle and control it properly to stop committing complications to this kind of scenario.

The Material or Economic Self

- “ Earn your different self-interest in life and value different economy standard within society.”

This is the last part of social dimension of self and today, we will discuss the topic about Material or Economic Self. People believe that our economic self revolves only in our needs and wants but it can literary talks about different aspect of material world where we fitted in right now in this post-modern period. As a Generation Z, we are able to suit ourselves in a industry of economy where we usually prefer buy our wants to attain our satisfaction like smartphones or gadgets, clothes, etc. It is also part of our interest to things because that specify our personal association. There is different alignment where an individual tend to buy something therefore it really matters whether a self awareness influence the character on how they choose or decides to purchase that pertain on its wants and social needs.The social status of an individual also declares possession to material things that individual can identify whether other individual is wealthy, middle-class or poor. In instance the technological factor and innovations signifies the potential of economic self.

- I have a personal observations and experiences when pandemic came to our lives. The potential of economic factor decline due to some issues and for safety purposes. A lot of industries close due to the pandemic and the economy itself is rapidly increasing because of this, online shopping is a platform where we can buy online materials or things such in apps like: Shopee and Lazada. Also, I see that the force of Grab Food and Food Panda increase in the midst of pandemic. But, financial status is one of the biggest problem that country faced today when we try to look for the view of “needs” and “wants” people will choose needs because of survival. An unemployment rate also increase because of this many people are hoping for financial assistance of the government but the fund of our government also has some issue, we have debts and the 15 billion pesos corruption of PhilHealth. Within these all observation, I realize that in this times we value the sense of money. Individuals learn how to save money and put it in a good way and needs such as food, bills, medicine and other essential goods etc. We are all benefited of our strategic plan for this but we are also a victim of continuously progression of pandemic in our country. We need to value, help each other and prioritize our needs to attain the accomplishment of economic self.

#culture #social media #economic

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foodreceipe · 3 years

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Humans may have invented the croissant. But machines perfected it.

Last week, I ate a wonderful croissant. Shaped in a familiar crescent, with the points fused in the center, this croissant was buttery but not oily, light but still substantial, and its layers peeled and flaked off without reducing the whole thing to a pile of sharp shards and crumbs. The first bite was pleasantly sweet, all the better to complement its savory filling: a sausage patty and a slab of too-yellow egg, just warmed through in its greasy wax paper packaging. I was at a rest stop off the New Jersey Turnpike, and the Burger King Croissan’wich, which has been in rotation on BK’s menu for longer than I’ve been alive, was the obvious and best choice for a meal on the road. A breakfast sandwich made between two halves of a croissant? Say no more.

At this point in my life, I’ve eaten croissants from just about everywhere that I can get my hands on one, but as is often the case when a food is deeply connected to a country’s national identity, the experience of eating a croissant in France can feel like communing with the height of the form. The dingiest boulangerie in the neighborhood in Paris where I lived for nine months had croissants that could make me tear up, even though I knew deep down that they weren’t really that good. A French croissant made with French butter by a real French baker always had that certain je ne sais quoi.

“It has to be a thrill for anyone,” Jim Chevallier, a food historian of French foods and the author of August Zang and the French Croissant, tells me by phone. “You have a whole confluence of people’s emotional expectations and nostalgia.” That experience is due in part to France’s historically good PR campaign for itself, he says. “Part of the image of France, and one of France’s big selling points, is that the French version is better,” Chevallier explains. “There’s a certain amount of national pride in it.” A Croissan’wich—having been invented in America in the 1980s by a fast-food chain—might not, by extension, seem as legit.

When you start to peel back its buttery layers, you’ll learn that even this quintessentially French pastry is itself dubiously French.

But when you start to peel back its buttery layers, you’ll learn that even this quintessentially French pastry is itself dubiously French. In Larousse Gastronomique, an encyclopedia of food history, croissants are said to have originated in Budapest in 1686, “when the Turks were besieging the city.” The story goes that the Hungarian bakers, who worked underground, sounded the alarm that the Turks were coming, and as a result of their patriotism, they were permitted to make pastries in the shape of a crescent, the emblem of the Ottoman flag. Other sources claim the pastry was invented during the siege of Vienna years earlier. Chevallier writes that if either of these stories were true, the bakers would have made a buttery roll based on an Austrian kipfel, not a flaky croissant, and that roll was invented long before either siege. Chevallier also debunks the well-circulated myth of Marie Antoinette bringing the pastry with her from Austria.

Chevallier links the arrival of the Austrian kipfel in Paris to August Zang, an enterprising Austrian businessman who opened the Boulangerie Viennoise around 1839. “Zang was very much a hustler and an entrepreneur,” Chevallier explains, and his savvy marketing made the kipfel explode in popularity across Paris. French people called the Austrian kipfels “croissants” because they were crescent-shaped (“croissant” is the French word for “crescent”). It was near the end of the 19th century that French bakers began incorporating thin and buttery laminated dough into their kipfel rolls—the kind of dough that makes croissants flaky. “The croissant changed, but people still thought of it as Viennese.”

Partly because of its labor-intensive preparation and partly because of its extreme butter content, the croissant has been elevated to an almost mythological status for food fans around the world. Its dough is pressed firmly (or laminated) with layers of butter, refrigerated, and proofed for long hours, then cut into precisely measured identical shapes. Its particularity and precision are qualities we tend to associate with Frenchness. Aurélien Legué, head chef instructor at Le Cordon Bleu Ottawa Culinary Arts Institute, writes by email that Le Cordon Bleu defines a croissant as “a buttery, flaky viennoiserie made with a pâte levée feuilleté (layered yeast-leavened dough), rolled and shaped in a half moon.”

In the early 1970s, the first industrialized croissants steamrolled right over this careful process and caused an uproar. Just as fast food was proliferating in France (the first McDonald’s arrived in France in 1972), Jean-Luc Bret opened the first La Croissanterie in 1977, where croissants were mass-produced on machines and cranked out all day long, not only for breakfast. This evolution from meticulous, handmade preparation to a machine-mixed, kneaded, laminated, and shaped croissant began to spill over into other countries, bringing the Croissan’wich to Burger King in 1983 and similar items to other chains like Starbucks, McDonald’s, Wendy’s, and Dunkin’ Donuts soon after. Now, you can get a vacuum-sealed croissant just about anywhere, as long as you’re content with it being eerily shelf-stable.

The act of making a croissant, Chevallier says, is meticulous, “but most things that are meticulous about it can be industrialized.”

“There’s a point where it’s like the emperor’s new clothes,” Chevallier says about the difference between a handmade and a machine-made croissant. “You’ve got a continuum from really disgraceful things like these French cafés that sell crescent-shaped bread—that’s almost fraud—and then the other end, where things are really pretty good, and people are claiming that they can taste the very exquisite nuance in this thing.” The act of making a croissant, Chevallier says, is meticulous, “but most things that are meticulous about it can be industrialized.”

In America, you can’t get fresh, perfectly crafted and human-made croissants on every corner, like you can in France, so the mass-produced options more than scratch the itch, even if they’re not made with high-fat Breton butter and farm-fresh eggs. At Dunkin’, croissants have been on the menu for “decades,” Mike Brazis, director of global culinary innovation at Dunkin’ Brands, wrote by email. “They are baked fresh every day in a process of folding thin layers of dough, sometimes until there are more than fifty layers.” Doesn’t that make them just as much a croissant as a croissant produced at the legendary Boulangerie Utopie in the 11th arrondissement? “We think our croissants are a great expression of the form, with a light, flaky texture, delicious aroma, and delicate but satisfying flavor,” Brazis says. “They are the most popular way our guests enjoy breakfast sandwiches.” (Personally, I prefer a Croissan’wich.)

“A preoccupation with authenticity all too often masks privilege and power,” explains Rachel Hopkin, a radio producer and folklorist who has written several papers on the lore of the croissant. “In the case of croissants, this privilege could involve having the resources to go chasing around France in search of the best croissant, or study at a top pâtisserie school, or get imported ingredients, or say what is authentic and what is not.” But the reality is that our personal relationships to croissants are what make them croissants.

Does a croissant have to be born and bred in France to truly be considered a croissant, if the original croissants weren’t born and bred in France in the first place?

“It comes down to the quality. Is it well made or is it not?” Chevallier says. “People have found various ways to reach that goal. How much do you care that what you’re eating in 2020 is not the same thing you’d be eating in 1920?”

https://tastecooking.com/the-industrial-croissant-deserves-your-respect/?utm_source=pocket-newtab

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#croissant

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worldfamousastrologers · 3 years

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Individuals are prevalently mindful that the universe is represented by a power, celestial or outer, that impacts our day by day life. While there is a level of individuals who might not have conviction, the worldwide people everywhere has faith in certain impacts the planetary framework and stars have on our destiny. Indian astrology or better still Hindu astrology is one of the most broadly regarded and rehearsed the nation over. The establishment of Hindu astrology depends on the Vedas. The Hindus firmly accept that the planetary situating and development at the hour of birth sway our lives, and the impacts are a consequence of our karmic past. The Navagrahas (planetary framework) are related with the Supreme Being and thus rule our lives.

India has large amounts of astrologer rehearsing different types of Hindu astrology. The vast majority of them have inside and out information regarding the matter just as Hindu sacred writings that help them give precise readings and forecasts. They additionally resolve issues for people through exhortation and therapeutic estimates that can assist them with defeating testing circumstances throughout everyday life.

One of the Best astrologer in Chandigarh, Vedant Sharmaa.

This celebrated astrologer in Chandigarh is a specialist in various types of Vedic Astrology that incorporate Parashara, Prasna, Hora, and Jamini, just as K P astrology. He utilizes customary strategies for Vedic and Sidereal (in light of current situation of heavenly bodies) Astrology. He additionally makes it a highlight utilize the set up standards of Jamini Sutra. For K P astrology, Vedant Sharmaa utilizes Prasna Jyotish techniques. His counsel abilities cover fields of wellbeing, way of life, profession, and prosperity. He offers answers for customers that contain celestial experiences just as reasonable answers for singular issues. Vedant Sharmaa has been rehearsing astrology for as long as five years.

At a youthful age, he had an essential information on astrology. Afterward, he sought after additional examinations in astrology and attempted an expert course. This prominent astrologer then proceeded to do his apprenticeship under a widely acclaimed astrology in Varanasi for a very long time.

This famous astrologer has tremendous information in astrology and is a specialist in Prashna Kundli, Kundli coordinating, birthstones, and gemology. He is very precise in his readings and expectations. He delivers administrations to customers on issues identified with wellbeing, relationship, individual issues, labor, profession, work move, and property. He advocates simple and basic healing measures to his customers that help them have a glad existence. Online best astrologer in India

He began learning astrology as an interest that later formed into an enthusiasm for him. He began tuning in to individuals and their issues and had a go at settling them. Before long, astrology turned into an enslavement. A certified astrology, Vedant Sharmaa, is a specialist in Vedic Astrology.

This famous astrology utilizes Vedic standards in anticipating horoscopes. He is of the firm conviction that cautious investigation should be made of the planets, signs, and houses. The presence of any Yogas - This famous astrologer offers precise readings and expectations. Vedant Sharmaa is likewise a specialist in Horary Astrology. He offers types of assistance on issues identified with affection, relationship, wellbeing, marriage, and profession. He prescribes accommodating answers for assist customers with defeating alarming occasions and improve joy in their lives.

The Taurus Character - The Second Sign of the Zodiac.

The Taurus CharacterThe Second Sign of the ZodiacBy Rebecca Brents

Need a couple of words to portray Taurus? Shouldn't something be said about "laid back" and "obliging?" Taurus likes to unwind, make life at a conscious stride and separately plan. Nothing more should be said. Taurus confides in sparing real resources ... also, "directing" its own energy is first on the overview. You can't push these individuals any speedier than they have a mind to go. Either become accustomed to it ... or then again decide to make stomach settling specialists part of your step by step life.

The image of the strong calm sort - especially the film legend in former period westerns - who just couldn't be pushed cockeyed, not in his own penchants nor in his stay on guideline, was quintessentially a Taurus. These individuals can take a huge load of worsening, guff, and issues, and handle troubles with open minded assurance, until something transforms into the absolute last thing that could be tolerated ... also, a while later the ensuing angry outburst leaves obliteration like a twister cut a zone across the land.

Right when Taurus individuals get distracted, the show is glorious. It's canny to look for cover until the coast is overly clear. Fortunately, with Taurus, such minutes are extraordinary. This sign really needs life to be peaceful, enchanting, charming, reliable, and stable.

Taurus people strike a casual development, getting a charge out of the world's genuine delights. The overall idea of stopping to appreciate the view is an astoundingly Taurus thought. No other sign may like the sheer physical-ness of life more than Taurus. They love pretty shadings, interesting surfaces, pleasant structures, charming and rich shapes, scrumptious aromas, complex flavors, moderating and rousing melodies, and their sleek tastes are stunning.

They need enough sheer greatness in their lives to work fittingly. Ecological elements that are unsanitary, confused, awful, or fundamentally unappealing ... can make a Taurus really wiped out. Likewise, a Taurus who keeps a disaster area around him is demonstrating indications of significant issues - deep down, mentally, significantly ... additionally, over the long haul truly.

Taurus is a closed in on a major level. He (or she) venerates a reliable, characteristic setting, where he can kick back in comfort and do nothing he might not want to do. Notwithstanding the way that he loathes being poked into whatever wasn't in particular his idea (and still, by the day's end, he'll get to it on his own arrangement), changes of any kind surprise him. This sign likes to plan his future - course far into the future, and a while later follow his game plan.

Getting a Taurus to move snappier or adjust his viewpoint is a certified involvement in the consistent article. Taurus makes determination a workmanship. It is the most fixed of the Fixed Signs (close by Aquarius, Scorpio, and Leo), and if you live with one (or need to exist together with one) it helps with recollecting that. You'll save yourself a lot of mileage.

Likewise, Taurus is the Fixed Earth sign, with severe relationship with the land. Taurus has a powerful ability to aggregate with nature and the Earth as living spirits. Close by those quiet, canny ecological components I referred to, Taurus needs to put energy in nature - out in the forested zones, up in the mountains, by a hustling stream or a flooding trout lake, on a property or homestead ... preferably in all of these spots.

Taurus similarly needs to have a touch of the Earth. Monstrous pieces of the earth, if possible. To keep an eye out over huge plots of land, woods, and fields that are his, all his, is a Taurean's dream. Regardless, a Taurus needs to guarantee his own home ... with whatever amount of land enveloping it that he can shoulder.

This sign works personally with issues of money, pay, and ownership for as long as its can remember, either by collecting an individual fortune (some will be contributed insightfully "for the future," and some will be spent on the comforts and shallow focal points that advertise this achievement to everyone) or by winding up unpleasantly based on perseverance and acquiring money until it can tap its regular capacities and assurance the simple financial stream that can be its legacy.

Taurus is a sign expected to be princely, to control and regulate material assets, to associate with the real world. This joins everything from getting a charge out of stimulating delights, to recognizing fine food, music, and workmanship, to understanding the recovering witchcraft of genuine reaching (and incredible sex!!), to considering children, pets, and plants - watching them create, make, and grow up. Taurus loves adventures that create after some time. All things considered, it's the best sort of bounty ... moreover, that well known resistance can make a fine accumulate.

Nevertheless, there is a downside to even this serene, sensitive, supportive sign. Other than the stiff necked attitude, it might be unnecessarily materialistic, outrageous, narcissistic, and status-and-money insightful. It can moreover be incredibly possessive of people in comfortable associations in a way that suggests "ownership" clearly. As such, it can end up being genuinely jealous - routinely over irregular information, and it isn't above using money as a weapon when there is impact to get from that.

Regardless, its endurance is inconceivable. Also, as a buddy, amigo, or sweetheart, you could sure do a ton more lamentable than having a person from this genuine, liberal, pleasant sign as the other segment of the association.

#bestastrologerchandigarh topastrologerchandigarh onlinebestastrologer worldfamousastrologer

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skewl4kewl · 4 years

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TASK 2 : What has Influenced me?

The question, “what has influenced me?” is a vast one, and is hard to articulate and objectively define what exactly has moulded me into the person that I am today. The sheer multitude of varying factors that shape an individual throughout different crucial stages in one’s life is hard to pinpoint, however has everything to do with the environment in which one grows up in both at home and in public. Living in Canada, specifically Vaughan Ontario, is a wonderful place for people to grow up and develop a fully intact, multi-faceted sense of self. Since Ontario is Canada’s most multicultural province, we as a community are truly blessed to be living in such a highly functioning cultural mosaic full of diverse food, fashion, entertainment, architecture and leisure activities. Looking back at my elementary school days, growing up & attending a French immersion public school as the child of Immigrant parents from the former state of Yugoslavia, I was very blessed to have friends from every continent on the earth. As a child I wasn’t aware of the cultural differences, since most if not all of my friends were born in Canada, and were mainly socialized by the Canadian public school system, but having those relationships as a young child embedded the belief that no matter what religion, race or orientation one may possess, we are all equal and deserve to be treated with the same respect as we navigated our way through the education system. My time on this earth has shown me that we can all peacefully and seamlessly co-exist and create meaningful life-long friendships as we build and ameliorate our community with unconventional and creative ideas that have its origins not only within conventional Canadian society, but foreign societies overseas and elsewhere. Since every individual person has a unique personality, distinct tastes and likes/dislikes, knowing there was a plethora of diverse ideologies, traditions and arts available for me to take a liking to and then subsequently express was profoundly important as it enabled me to see a bit of myself in each of the different things I was inclined towards. This allowed me to view the world from a lenses of interconnectedness, to see the similarities between all the diverse cultures, religions and walks of life around the world, it reinforced the notion of unity and common humanity.

The specifics into my journey surround exposing myself to different subcultures via leisure activities, starts with me identifying with the movements of Feminism and Veganism. These 2 ideologies massively shifted the way in which I viewed the world. Feminism has been around for a long time, but the oppression of women has existed longer, and thus the idea has yet to be fully realized on a global scale. We here in the west are blessed because our government fully embraces the notion of equality between the genders, however there are still spots in society that unconsciously allow for systemic gender based discrimination, which I had first hand experience with unfortunately as a young teenager coming of age. I began to defy gender presentation norms, embracing body hair and rejecting the female beauty standard dictated by our respective society as a means to protest the status-quo which perpetuates the marginalization of women. Veganism came as a result of becoming good friends with a vegan at school and admiring her mindful, compassionate and empathic demeanor as she interacted with other students and faculty. Veganism is the practice of abstaining from the use of animal products, particularly in diet, and an associated philosophy that rejects the commodity status of animals. A follower of the diet or the philosophy is known as a vegan. Beginning to view all forms of life as sentient and able to feel pain and express emotion was the first step in becoming a more mindful and compassionate person, which allowed me increase my own self-awareness in order to perpetually grow and learn from the lessons life incessantly throws. In high school I was also exposed to different art forms such as intuitive painting and drawing as a means to de-stress and relieve my social anxiety and discovered that “art” doesn’t need to look any which way, and whatever comes up on the canvas is a direct reflection of what you need to let out. Art as a form of creation was very helpful for me as I began to experiment with creating jewelry, to know that I was able to focus my energy and creative vision enough to make a tangible piece of wearable jewelry was very empowering and showed me that I had the capacity to create things in the real world. Living in a free market society also spawned a multitude of different businesses with it’s origins steeped in foreign cultural traditions and ideologies. I am grateful that my friend took me to a yoga studio when I said I wanted to work out. This experience opened up a whole new world to me, one in which I felt good not only physically but mentally as well, and with the implementation of a steady yogic practice this was the first step that catalyzed me in creating my won tradition which prioritized developing self awareness. As this self awareness and mindfulness grew, I began to understand that I was capable of accomplishing anything if I just focused my time and energy toward the direction of what I wanted. It allowed me to understand that everything I needed or seeked, was already within me, and in order to achieve my goals and desires all I needed to do was create a firm connection to myself which fostered firm belief IN myself. This was PIVOTAL.

Living in Vaughan, which is right beside Brampton, I grew up with many friend who were Sikh, and I remember growing up and going over to their houses to be greeted by their warm mothers who offered me the most delectable, nutritious and vegan/vegetarian foods. I developed a fascination in how the women adorned their bodies like temples with the fashion they chose to wear, and eventually made the decision to visit India to do a Yoga Teacher training and to just develop a deeper appreciation for all the country has given throughout time. As I immersed myself in eastern philosophy’s and sister-practices related to yoga like Ayurveda and Vedic meditation, I developed a very fond appreciation for Asian culture, more specifically for the multitude of spiritual gifts bestowed to humanity from India. I travelled to India to understand the origins of the ideas, rituals and traditions that framed the culture I connected with so deeply, and began to study the history of the country, which allowed me to understand my own respective culture with a more accepting lens. During my travels I was amazed and floored by the religious architecture, knowing that they were so old, yet such intricate pieces of functional art. I can say with confidence that my #1 leisure activity now is yoga and meditation, it provides so much soothing solace and relaxation and t re-sets me back to a space within myself where I feel completely at ease , without any anxiety attached to who I am, simply just being. I still enjoy the simple things in life as a means of entertainment, hanging out with my favourite friends and family, playing board games, hiking through new trails as I embark on journeys throughout Ontario with my friends, waking up early, enjoying a cup of tea and a good book, staying up late and talking about what scares me the most with my friends, just the small sweet free things that make your relationships forge a stronger/deeper bond, having a really tight knit sound support system is the most important thing in my life, and funnily enough is the things that brings me the most joy and fun in life.

So what has influenced me, at the end of the day I can say a lot of good and bad things have influenced me, I believe this can be applied to most people as we all have been influenced and propagated by false notions via the media and school systems. However the distinction here is, what has made the most lasting impact on who I am as a person and my character. I believe those experiences have afforded me the ability to assess what social norm, rules and values serve the person that I am and strive to be, and what societal norms, rules and values do not serve a purpose and stifle my ability at self-realization and fully asserting my own autonomous sense of self in the world, regardless of the reaction i may receive as a result of defying or adhering to these societal rules. The moments in which I was exposed to different ways of doing things that deviated away from our Canadian societal norms, sometimes reflected my own culture of origin, and sometimes vehemently opposed it via lifestyle, ideology, food, fashion, architecture, tradition and overall belief systems. These were important moments because it forced me to objectively be introspective about my own belief systems that were fueling my behaviours at the time, and to justly turn said belief systems on their heads in order to gain an alternate perspective so I could understand what true empathy and a total sense of compassion and understanding that sometimes what we need is the exact opposite of what we want. Sometimes what we require the most for our own growth, are the experiences that place us directly in a position of discomfort. We’d rather choose the devils (complacency, comfort, convenience) we know then put ourselves out there in foreign situations for the possibility of meeting the angel we deserve.

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