#its not my fault james is also the sun
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MAYBE I'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT STARCHASER TOO MUCH 😭
#but it does...#his fav season is summer and he looks good in the aun#its not my fault james is also the sun#the sun is warm and bright and constant#similar traits to my beloved#lol beloved#inside joke#relationships#jegulus#james potter#regulus black#Starchaser#sunseeker
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— CALM AFTER THE STORM
pairing: remus lupin x reader
summary: the 4 times you hate each other, and the one time you don’t. alternatively, remus lupin is a pain in your arse and yours alone.
warnings: enemies to lovers, swearing, kissing, mention of blood and wounds, some bad writing as always which is unedited
author’s note: just a little e2l fic for my own indulgence as its my fave trope and its criminal how i barely have any e2l fics… also haven’t written anything in ages soooo enjoy!
when he just has to be controversial
The sun was beaming, colourful rays reflecting over your book through the stained-glass windows of the Gryffindor common room as you lounged on the sofa with your head in Lily’s lap. You were barely paying attention to the chatter of your friends around you, choosing to focus on your copy of ‘The Catcher in the Rye’ and Marlene’s soft guitar playing. The lazy afternoon is a welcome break from the increasingly stressful N.E.W.T lessons that have had you all so exhausted, you’re not sure if Peter is asleep or dead from his curled-up position on the rug.
You don’t even realise someone is saying your name until Marlene tickles the sole of your socked foot with her guitar pick, making you yelp and draw your legs in from where they were previously tucked in between Marlene and her guitar.
“What was that for?” you grumble, nudging her arm with your foot.
Marlene smirks, nodding over to James. “He told me to get your attention. Didn’t specify how.”
You roll your eyes and turn on your side to face the boy in question, his grin unfaltering as he multitasks polishing the handle of his broomstick and talking to you. “Not my fault you’re dead to the world when you’re reading,” he says, matter-of-fact, continuing when you raise your eyebrows in impatience. “I was just wondering how you could look so interested in that book. Remus said he’d do my homework for a month if I finished it the other day and I couldn’t get past five arse-numbingly dull pages.”
You scoff, adjusting your position again to face Remus as well. “And why was Remus betting you to read my book, exactly?”
“It was my copy,” Remus replies, scribbling away on his parchment, cross legged on his chair, to undoubtedly finish the Potions essay that Slughorn had set yesterday. You’re transfixed on the way his hand is moving across the page for a second, unable to fathom how someone can have such messy handwriting. You aren’t surprised in the slightest that the next words coming out of his mouth are ones you disagree with. “I wanted to see how long he lasted reading the slowest-paced book in the world.”
You abruptly sit up at this, shutting your book and forgetting plans of relaxation.
“Hey, watch it!” Lily exclaims, lifting the bottle of black polish she’s using to paint Sirius’ nails from its balanced position on her thigh to avoid you spilling it all over her white top. “If you’re about to argue, please refrain from throwing things until after I’ve done the second coat of nail polish.”
You pointedly ignore this and narrow your eyes at Remus who, infuriatingly, still hasn’t lifted his head from his essay. “I’m surprised you found it hard to read such a slow book. Thought that’d be perfect for you.”
“Look what you’ve started, Prongs,” Sirius sighs, examining his nails.
Seeing the corners of Remus’ lips pull up into a slight smile at your comment just spurs you on in defence of the book you were previously enjoying. “Besides, it’s about a real-life teenager with real-life struggles, not The Hobbit on his latest adventure.”
“Who’s Hobbit?” James mumbles, scratching his head in confusion as Marlene just shrugs, equally oblivious.
“It’s overrated,” Remus insists, finally setting down his quill to look at you. The amused expression still hasn’t left his face and you make a noise halfway between a scoff and a high-pitched squeal of indignance. “Even James agrees.”
“Oh, and James’ opinion on literature is the standard now?” You raise a brow, tutting when James starts to protest. “The only book James has finished in the last six years was Quidditch Through the Ages.”
The way James slowly slides the aforementioned book under one of the sofa cushions doesn’t go unnoticed by anyone. Sirius starts snickering, much to Lily’s annoyance as she tries to control his hand. “She got you there, in fairness, mate.”
Sirius’ chortling seems to stir Peter from his sleep and he opens one eye to peer at you. Seeming to catch sight of your irritated expression, he frowns. “Are these two arguing like an old married couple again?”
“Merlin help us if these two ever decide to get married,” Marlene utters under her breath, bent over her guitar and avoiding the weight of your glare.
“Yeah, he wishes,” you grumble, shuffling around on the sofa to get back into a comfortable position with your book. Remus’ smile has only widened in response and he seems to enjoy your discomfort as you overcompensate for showing your annoyance by wriggling about.
“I dream about it every night,” Remus replies, dryly and Peter giggles below you before turning over to sleep again.
You overcompensate a little too much by moving around, because Lily huffs from beside you and starts scrambling around for a tissue. “What did I say about the second coat?”
“I didn’t throw anything this time!”
2. when he won’t let you give someone a black eye
Defence Against the Dark Arts is your favourite N.E.W.T subject for a lot of reasons. You enjoy the lesson content, it’ll be useful in future years, and it’s the one lesson you share with every single one of your friends.
You’ve gotten used to James and Sirius messing around while Professor Marigold recites fact after fact about spells and creatures and wizards of dark nature. Its like soothing background noise to you and your classmates who all concentrate in silence most of the time.
Which is why your quill stops on your page and leaves a growing ink blot when you hear snickering and whispers from the other side of the classroom rather than from in front of you where the marauders sit in a line.
The scoffs of disgust coming from Snape and Mulciber are loud enough to attract the attention of the rest of the students and even the teacher, who eventually sets down her piece of chalk in the middle of talking about Wolfsbane potion with an impatient sigh.
“Is there some sort of pressing issue that can’t wait until after class to discuss, boys?” Professor Marigold asks with a tone of ire that would impress Professor McGonagall. “Even Black and Potter have decided to give it a rest today.”
She’s not wrong, you think, noting how they’ve been less disruptive than usual for this lesson, probably tired out from setting each other’s robes on fire in Charms the hour before.
“The pressing issue is werewolves,” Snape mutters quietly, as though he doesn’t want to make a big issue but can’t stop himself from speaking up. “We should be learning more about how to kill them and less about the price of potion ingredients.”
Lily gasps from beside you and Sirius and James tense up at his words. Remus doesn’t lift his head, but you absently notice how his grip tightens around his quill when Peter nervously turns to him. Peter isn’t one for conflict and he’s always been nervous around this particular group of Slytherins, so you’re not surprised he’s anxious.
“Werewolves are still people, you can’t just go around killing them!” you find your mouth moving on its own, before your brain can catch up. When Snape turns to direct his scowl at you, its matched by your own as well as Lily’s disappointed frown. “They didn’t ask to be werewolves, they physically can’t help it! How would you feel if people wanted to kill you for not being able to control being such an arse.”
“Miss Y/L/N,” Professor Marigold warns, setting her stern eyes on you. You’re not one for disrupting lessons or getting into trouble, so when Remus turns around to look at you with a raised eyebrow, your cheeks start to warm and you stubbornly don’t look his way again.
Snape ignores her to continue glaring at you. “I don’t have the capacity to kill people in a feral rage now, do I?” His gaze flits from you to Lily and Marlene and then lingers on the boys. “Of course, you’re defending werewolves. It’s no surprise considering who you choose to associate yourself with.”
“Mr Snape.”
“You have no need to fly into a feral rage to kill people,” you reply, voice steadily rising in volume. Sirius and James turn their heads back and forth like they’re watching a tennis match and you know the only reason they haven’t piped up to agree with you is because they’re too entertained watching the way you’re about to jump out of your seat to pounce on Snape. “All you need to do is show someone your face for them to die of fright–”
“ENOUGH!” Professor Marigold’s booming voice cuts through the laughter of everyone on the Gryffindor side of the classroom and when you turn to look at her, you see even Remus’ shoulders are shaking with silent laughter. You’re not sure why this pleases you, but it doesn’t last long enough for you to figure it out before Marigold waves her wand in the direction of the door and sends it flying open. “Both of you will wait for me outside the classroom until the lesson has finished so I can discuss your appalling behaviour.”
You gape at her for a second, before relenting and grabbing your bag, not wanting to argue with her authority. Your friends have different ideas.
“That’s not fair!” Marlene exclaims, standing up in protest. “She didn’t even do anything wrong.”
“Yeah,” James agrees, also standing up. “Snape’s the one who was being an annoying pri–”
“Sit down, everyone,” Marigold cuts him off, pursing her lips. “Everyone except Mr Snape and Miss Y/L/N. Do not even think about speaking Mr Black, or I won’t hesitate to suspend your and Mr Potter’s Quidditch privileges until further notice.”
Sirius shuts his mouth after a nudge from James and you shoot your friends a grateful smile before making your way out of the classroom, followed closely by Snape.
The door shuts behind him and you don’t bother sparing him a glance before dumping your bag on the ground and leaning against a wall to focus your gaze on a suit of armour for the next five minutes. You’re about half a minute in when you notice that one of the hands are slightly wonky and the classroom door suddenly opens.
Remus, of all people, enters the hallway to join the two of you and quickly shuts the door.
“What are you doing here?” you ask, furrowing your brows and getting up from against the wall.
“Yeah, what are you doing here?” Snape sneers at him, and you give him a scathing look before turning to Remus for an answer.
Remus pointedly ignores him to stand next to you against the brick wall. “I just pointed out to Professor Marigold that you both have your wands and she may not have two students left out here by the end of the lesson.”
“I can defend myself,” you snort, folding your arms. You aren’t sure if you’re annoyed that Remus is insinuating otherwise, or if you’re touched that he doesn’t want you to be hexed into oblivion by Snape. “Especially from him.”
“Oh, I know,” Remus raises both hands in surrender as his tone becomes grave. “It’s not you I’m worried about, trouble.”
“Ha ha,” you deadpan, rolling your eyes at the nickname. He started it around a year ago when you got your first ever detention for helping Sirius and James Charm the Slytherin chairs to throw them off every time someone sat. Your friends had kept quiet about your involvement, but Peeves had spotted you, the nosy bastard. The nickname stemmed from the fact it was the first time you had ever gotten into trouble and it never failed to irritate you. “You better be careful I don’t hex you.”
“I wouldn’t dream of annoying you,” he says, but the serious tone of voice is ruined by the way his lips are twitching in an attempt not to laugh at you. “After what happened when I said I didn’t like that one Jane Austen book? Forget it.”
“Hey, you insulted one of my favourite characters,” you point out, resting a hand on your hip. “What did Emma ever do to you? You had that hex coming.”
“I had pink hair for a week,” Remus narrows his eyes at you, but you can tell he isn’t really angry. Although he refuses to admit it, you know for a fact he didn’t hate the pink hair considering how good he looked with it. An annoying indiscretion on your part. Remus looks behind you for a split second before leaning in a little to whisper. “I won’t get in the way if you want to turn Snape’s hair pink, though. Preferably a very bright shade of flaming, hot pink.”
At risk of your own cheeks flaming up from how close he is – really, what’s the need? – you shake your head let your hair fall into your face. Almost having forgotten Snape is also there, you start when he scoffs (for what you think is the millionth time this afternoon) and you sigh before facing him begrudgingly. “What now?”
“Couldn’t handle the content of today’s lesson?” he asks, tiling his head. You’re about to ask him what the hell he’s talking about before you realise, he isn’t actually talking to you, but to the boy behind you.
“Uh…” you trail off, not sure how to respond. All three of you currently standing in the corridor know that Remus is smart enough to tackle any type of content, especially something as memorable and interesting as werewolves.
Remus’ amused demeanour has been wiped away and you can’t determine his exact expression, but his voice is cold when he talks to you. “Just ignore him.”
“You and your group of friends can’t help themselves when it comes to defending strays and all sorts,” Snape continues, much to your confusion. “It’s not enough that you’re a group full of blood-traitors and mudbloods…”
Remus tenses up behind you and you find yourself frozen for a second.
The next thing you know, you’re lunging at the greasy-haired Slytherin with every intention of hurting his face with your fists, wand long forgotten. Your fingers barely brush his robes, however, when you feel yourself being hauled back by strong arms that wrap around your middle.
“Let go!” you snarl, enjoying the way Snape has backed away, eyes wide and worried. “Did you hear what he said? Remus, let me go.”
He doesn’t relent, still holding onto you when he leans down to speak in your ear. “You’ve already gotten into trouble. You’ll get into a whole lot more when everyone walks out to see Snape with a black eye and you with bruised knuckles.”
“Worth it,” you grit out, still pulling away from his grip and throwing daggers with your eyes at Snape. After a few more seconds of pointless struggling, you relax very slightly just to turn in his arms so you can direct your next words to him more pointedly. “Not only is he a slimy, blood-supremacist twat, but he also wants to kill a poor bunch of werewolves. We should be throwing him into the bloody Black Lake!”
“I know, I-” Remus is cut off when the door opens and students start flooding into the corridor to provide a barrier between you and Snape, indicating the end of the lesson. Remus finally lets you go when he realises you’re in direct view of Professor Marigold who stands behind her desk, waiting for you. “I had no idea you were such an advocate for werewolves.”
It’s the last thing you expected him to say and you immediately look up at him and frown. “Again, they’re people. They don’t deserve to be victims of prejudice just as no one does.” He doesn’t respond, staring at you with an unreadable expression and a hint of a smile. Your frown deepens in confusion. Was he… laughing at you? Especially after you had just gotten along. “I’m so glad you find me amusing,” you say, scowling and storming back into the classroom and away from Remus.
3. when he's too good for flower crowns.
“Tell it again,” James insists, grin wide as ever plastered onto his face despite the withering look you send his way. “Getting a glimpse at even the possibility of Snivellus getting pummelled by Y/N would have made my entire year.”
“The galleons I’d give up to have been there,” Sirius releases a wistful sigh, closing his eyes as he lies down, facing the sun.
You hand him the daisy chain crown you just finished and he dutifully dons it. “I’ll alert the Ministry of Magic to order in a time-turner for an issue of utmost urgency,” you say sarcastically as you start on the next daisy chain. Sirius merely winks at you.
“I think you should’ve let her have at him, Remus,” Marlene states, unapologetic. You nod vehemently in agreement, a little too enthusiastically as you end up splitting a daisy down the middle.
Lily tuts, adjusting her own flower crown as it slips against her silky red hair. “I’m glad you didn’t. Godric knows what Professor Marigold would have done,” she shudders at the thought, ever the diligent student.
“Forget Marigold,” Peter chimes in. “Imagine what Professor McGonagall would have done.”
You don’t miss how he looks over his shoulder in case your head of house is taking a stroll along the grassy grounds.
“She would have combusted when you called him an ugly arse,” Remus pipes in, unhelpfully might you add, from where he sits slightly away from the group under a tree, reading.
The comment sends Marlene, Sirius and Peter into a fit of laughter – James is too busy staring at the way the sun is making Lily look ethereal and she’s too busy pretending not to notice while being secretly pleased. Doing a quick survey of your friends, you see everyone now has a flower crown except Remus. You make your way to the tree he’s resting against while the others chat, and sit yourself down with purpose.
Remus lowers his book very slightly to peer at you and your too-sweet smile. He raises a sceptical brow. “Should I be scared right now?”
You drop the fake smile and hold up your flower crown expectantly. “Everyone has one, but you.”
“How observant,” he says, setting his book down to look at you in mock astonishment. “Have the Aurors at the Ministry caught wind of you yet?”
“Don’t be a pain,” you groan, dropping it onto his open book. “I want everyone to wear one for the picture!”
Remus sighs, looking at the large camera over by your bag. You had saved up all summer to buy a magical camera to be able to take pictures of you and your friends in your final year at Hogwarts. The time you used your own muggle camera was a disaster of sparks and broken bits of plastic that took hours to mend. “I already agreed to your incessant picture-taking,” he reminds you, acting like it’s the most painful thing in the world. “The flower crown is not happening.”
“Fine, you miserable git,” you flick a handful of grass at him, sending him sputtering. “Now come and sit for the photo.”
You return to the group with Remus behind you and get everyone in position before hunting down someone to take the photo. Glancing around, you spot a close bunch of first-years and send Lily to use her Head Girl credentials (and warm and inviting personality, of course) to rope one of them into coming over.
“Okay, smile everyone,” you order, plopping down on the grass next to James. You elbow him in the ribs, not even having to look at him to know what he’s doing. “Stop looking at Lily and look at the camera.”
With a couple of mutterings and some nudging, the nervous first-year Hufflepuff girl shakily takes the picture and hurriedly hands you the camera in the middle of the picture sliding out of it. James and Sirius go back to playing with a golden Snitch while Peter watches, while Remus returns to his book.
Lily looks at the picture and coos over how cute everyone looks at the same time as Marlene complaining about her hair. You impatiently take the picture back to slide it into your photo album and something catches your eye.
Sirius is making a peace sign behind Remus’ head. His head that wears a flower crown.
4. when he bleeds out on you.
You’re not sure what time it is – either very late at night, or very early in the morning. You do know, however, that you want to finish your Herbology essay so you can enjoy tomorrow (or today) and cheer your friends on in the Gryffindor vs Ravenclaw Quidditch game. You only have the conclusion left and you’re confident it’ll be done in the next ten minutes.
If you can find your damned quill, that is. You could have sworn you had it ten minutes ago, just before you snuck down to the kitchens to persuade the house-elves to give you the strongest cup of coffee they could make. You take a quick sip and grimace at the lukewarm temperature before setting it down and getting up to search. After turning every sofa cushion upside down, you go to crouch behind the sofa.
You hear the door to the common room being swung open and the hushed voices of the Marauders enter, but you don’t take too much notice as you squint for your quill. It isn’t unusual for the boys to be roaming around the castle at odd hours of the night, but a hiss of pain grabs your attention at the same time you spot the quill.
“Can you guys manage taking him up to the-” Sirius cuts himself off when your face pops up from behind the sofa. He freezes in his efforts to hold up Remus, who you notice is leaning on him and James and Merlin’s balls he’s covered in blood.
“What the fuck happened to him?” Your voice comes out weak as you walk over to the boys. Remus has deep, bleeding slashes over his chest and an assortment of little cuts on his face and hands. He seems barely able to keep his eyes open but when his gaze meets yours, he winces. He isn’t the only one hurt and you realise Sirius’ arm is damp with blood and trembling, the same going for James’ thigh. “What the fuck happened to all of you, oh my God…?”
“Peter, you were supposed to keep watch,” James hisses at the boy who looks like a deer in headlights. He looks a lot better than the others, with only a couple of small cuts scattered around his face and arms.
“She was behind the sofa!”
James’ leg buckles and you snap out of your state of shock to dart forward and keep him steady. “Right. Shit, okay,” you breathe out, holding off asking any questions to prevent anyone from bleeding out. “James, Sirius, set Remus down on the sofa and take off his shirt. Peter, help these two up the stairs and go find a first-aid kit or something.”
“We’ve got a couple in the dorm,” Sirius says, summoning one of them down with a quick Accio and handing it to you. He hesitates for a second, probably unsure if he should stay and explain things, before deciding to turn in the direction of the stairs with James as Peter rushes to help them up. “Look after him, please. We’ll be right back, Moony.”
“Take your time, I’ve got him,” you utter, already fiddling with the first-aid box and trying to open it with shaky hands. You’re no healer, but you know enough to panic when you see Remus has had his eyes closed for the last few seconds. “Remus, keep your eyes open!”
He groans, cracking one eye open to look at you. “I’m injured and bleeding out and you still manage to yell at me.”
“I wasn’t yelling,” you frown, unscrewing the bottle of dittany and scrambling for the cotton pads. You try to avoid Remus’ gaze because you feel extremely silly about being more panicked than him when he’s the one with claw marks down his chest. “Don’t move, or it’ll hurt.”
While dabbing the liquid onto the deep gashes in an attempt to close them up, you ponder on the fact that he probably knows it hurts from experience. You’re not completely clueless.
“What are you thinking?” Remus whispers in the stifling quiet of the common room, looking unsure.
You don’t cease in your movements, changing cotton pad after cotton pad. It takes you a minute to muster up the courage to meet Remus’ gaze again and this time he looks more nervous than you’ve ever seen him. “You’re a werewolf, aren’t you?”
Remus gives you an almost imperceptible nod, like he doesn’t want to admit to it. You take a deep breath.
“Who else knows?” you ask calmly, as if you’re asking him about the weather.
“The boys and Lily,” he admits, swallowing hard. “Oh, and Snape.”
“Snape?” you exclaim, halting your dabbing to gawp at Remus. “I’m not saying you had to tell me or anything, but Snape?”
Remus winces and you don’t think it has anything to do with his injuries. “In my defence he found out on his own and hates me for it,” he rushes out. “And it’s not that I didn’t want to tell you… I-”
“It’s fine,” you cut him off, waving him off and wondering how good you’re hiding the fact you’re a little hurt. “You didn’t have to tell me.”
“No, I wanted to. I did,” Remus insists, looking earnest. There’s something in his voice that’s a little pained and desperate that has you meeting his eyes. “I just couldn’t have dealt with it if you started looking at me differently. The boys and Lily sometimes do, y’know? Like I’m made of glass or something. It’s refreshing whenever you scowl at me or call me an idiot or an arse or a stupid gi-”
“Okay,” you stop him, stifling a grin. “I get it!”
Remus’ eyes flash with relief for a second before you notice doubt start to creep in again. “You don’t need to hide it, by the way. I won’t hold it against you if… If you’re scared or disgusted, or-”
“What?” you cut him off again and scrunch your nose in confusion. “I’m not scared or disgusted. Why would you think that?”
“You’ve been a bit too calm,” he points out.
Rolling your eyes, you grab a bandage to start patching up the worst of the injuries before you move onto the minor cuts and bruises. “I didn’t want you to think I was freaking out, or looking at you differently,” you quote his own words to him with a pointed look, making him smile again. “I don’t, you know. Think of you any differently, I mean.”
His expression is unreadable as he just looks at you and you just look at him, bandage hovering over his chest before his fingers come up to brush the back of your hand. He lightly holds your hand, softly running his thumb over your knuckle as his voice drops to a whisper again. “Thank you.”
You offer him a gentle smile, holding his gaze for a second longer before focusing on bandaging him up again. His hand drops to the side and you oddly find yourself missing his warmth. The large bandage adheres to his skin and you run your fingers along the sides to stick them down, feeling him shudder under your touch.
You quickly busy yourself with looking for more supplies in the kit to hide the way your own breathing has increased slightly. “Hey, anyway, I almost walloped Snape right in the eye for you. If that wasn’t any indication of my standing on werewolves, I don’t know what is.”
“Ah, my knight in shining armour,” Remus chuckles before breaking into a wheeze as the muscles of his injured abdomen contract. “Fuck, don’t make me laugh.”
“Don’t laugh at me then!”
5. when you’re definitely not jealous… you’re not!
Three cups of coffee. You’re on three cups of coffee. It’s also the same number of hours you’ve slept and by Godric can you feel it in every inch of your body as the muted chatter of the Great Hall buzzes around you. Your head is in your hands as you contemplate stealing some Polyjuice potion and bribing a first-year to take a dose with your hair in it so you can go to bed and they can pretend to watch the Quidditch match.
You knock back the last sip of coffee when you sense a presence sliding onto the bench in front of you. Groggily setting the cup down, you see that its Remus. It takes a second to remember why this is concerning.
“Morning, h- Wait, what the hell are you doing out of bed?” you hiss, leaning forward to avoid anyone listening in. You scan your eyes over his chest, two seconds away from ripping his shirt off to check his bandages. “How are you even standing?”
“Relax, Florence Nightingale,” Remus says, rolling his eyes at your dramatics. He does his own quick sweep of the table and sees that most people are out in the Quidditch stands already, so he proceeds to pull the neckline of his shirt down slightly to reveal an already fading scar. No bleeding in sight. “I went to Madame Pomfrey with the boys this morning and she hurried up the process like she usually does. I feel achier than a 90-year-old woman with a metal hip, but the brunt of it is gone and Pads and Prongs are good as new.”
“Okay,” you say slowly, narrowing your eyes slightly. “If you’re sure you can sit out in the stands…”
“I can once I’ve consumed every cup of tea on the premises,” he says, reaching for the teapot. An annoyingly smug smirk starts to appear on his face while he pours. “What, are you worried about me, trouble?”
You scowl instantly. “No, I just don’t want you collapsing on me in the Quidditch stands while I’m cheering the boys on.”
“Right.” He hides his grin behind his cup of tea.
“Hey,” you mumble, nodding to Patricia Holloway who looks like she’s making a beeline to your table. More specifically, towards Remus. “Bright and cheery Hufflepuff incoming.”
“Merlin, it’s too early for this,” Remus whispers, taking another sip of tea before his face breaks out into a charming smile directed at the girl who slides into the empty seat next to him. “Morning, Patricia.”
“You look good today, Remus,” Patricia rests her elbow on the table and tilts her head to look at him with simpering eyes. It’s no secret Remus is good-looking and you’ve heard a million girls talk about him before. You’ve never seen any of them approach him yourself, though. You can’t say you enjoy it. “Are you… okay, Y/N?”
You didn’t realise you were scowling until she addresses you and you rapidly smooth out your expression, clearing your throat. Remus looks amused, which makes it harder to keep the scowl off your face. “Fine! I’m fine, just a bit confused since Remus looks half asleep,” you attempt a laugh through gritted teeth and are spurred on when Remus is actively trying to fight a grin. “And his hair currently makes him look like he’s been dragged through the Forbidden Forest.”
He can’t stop himself snorting at that, but Patricia just looks confused as though unsure how to react. She settles on a nervous little laugh, turning back to him. “I can fix that for you, here,” she says, scooting closer and starts to run her hands through Remus’ hair. You poke your cheek with your tongue, marvelling at how bold she’s being and how Remus is just sat there, still looking amused as ever. “There, what do you think?”
“A hairbrush couldn’t have done a better job,” you deadpan, softening your expression slightly when Patricia begins to look a little disconcerted. “You keep doing that, I’m going to head off to the Quidditch field.”
You all but storm out of the Great Hall, exhaustion having left you completely. It’s replaced by a newfound whirl of irritation that pools in your stomach and creeps up your throat, making you feel a little sick. It must be the coffee, you think, and you’re trying to remember if the beverage has ever made you experience this when all of a sudden there’s a hand circling your wrist.
“Stop, Y/N,” Remus says, a little breathless. You didn’t realise he’d run out after you and you feel bad about his injuries before your gaze snags on his newly tousled hair. “Godric, you walk fast.”
“I didn’t ask you to catch up to me,” you snap, purposely scowling this time. The cheeky bastard still looks amused and your irritation is growing faster than ever. “Besides, the match doesn’t start for another fifteen minutes. Plenty of time for Patricia to give you a whole new hairdo. Maybe she can give you plaits or– Why are you laughing.”
“You’re jealous,” he exhales with a smile, sounding positively delighted. Any feelings of concern have disappeared and are being rapidly replaced with wanting to thwack him upside the head. “Oh my God, you really are jealous.”
“Jealous, my arse,” you scoff, turning your back to him with every intention of speed walking out of the castle. His long legs keep up with you easily and he rushes in front of you to stop you going anywhere. You glare at him. “Leave me alone, Lupin.”
“Not until you admit that you’re jealous.” Remus is positively giddy with glee and you feel a flush of heat crawling up your neck. You set your jaw stubbornly and he’s incredulous as he shakes his head. “Merlin, you really have to argue with me on everything don’t you? I don’t care about Patricia Holloway and I’m glad you’re jealous. Means you’re less likely to break my nose when I kiss you.”
You barely get the chance to make an incoherent noise when Remus grabs you by the waist and presses his lips against yours, kissing you like he isn’t prepared to let you go anytime soon. His mouth slides hot and wet against your own and you gasp into the kiss when he nips lightly at your lip, your hands coming up to slide into his hair, making it unruly all over again.
Remus is the first to break apart, too soon, and you physically restrain yourself from chasing after his lips. He pulls back slightly, breathing fast to look into your eyes, searching for the answer you’re unable to speak yet.
“You… uh, I-I’m…” you trail off, dazed and breathless and head swirling with every emotion under the sun.
Remus laughs, pulling you impossibly close and leaving a soft kiss on your jaw, which doesn’t help your current speech issues. “If I knew that was all it took to shut you up, I’d have kissed you years ago.”
“Wha-!” You slap his arm, snapping out of the haze. You hide your current uncertainty behind a glare. It hit you like a ton of bricks, but you realised about five seconds into the kiss that you wanted Remus Lupin in every way, shape and form. You’re more than a little terrified, so what better defence mechanism than anger? “Why did you actually kiss me, you prick?”
“You are the densest, most clueless,” Remus begins, pausing to kiss you lightly a couple times when you start to scowl. “Most stubborn and most beautiful little witch I’ve ever known. And if you haven’t figured out after almost seven years that I love you, then I’m afraid we might have to admit you to St Mungo’s, because really-”
“Stop,” you whisper, lifting a finger to press against his lips, effectively silencing him. “You love me? You actually, seriously love me?”
He rolls his eyes and nods, like it’s obvious or something. You huff. “Then why have you been such an annoying pain in my bloody arse, Remus Lupin?!”
“Because,” he says, the word coming out muffled and you hastily remove your finger. “It was a good way to keep your attention. Plus, I like when you’re angry. It’s cute.”
You scowl without thinking and his smile impossibly widens.
“See?”
“Shut up and kiss me again,” you say dryly, pulling him in by the collar to give him a short, searing kiss. “Oh, and I guess I love you too.”
“So, no broken noses in my future?” Remus asks hopefully, softly sliding his nose against yours.
“No promises.”
© angelfic 2023.
#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin ff#remus lupin fic#marauders x reader#marauders fanfic#remus x reader#remus lupin scenarios#andrew garfield x reader#remus fanfic#remus fanfiction
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Giving Up On Your World
Regulus x Dead!Y/n
Warnings: Angst, slight mentions of su!cide nothing explicit but metaphorical mentions.
I wrote this like a year ago, Its probably very out of character but I was sad when I wrote this! I love Regulus so very much 😭. And this is short!
Perhaps the sky above couldnt really save him from the fact. Y/n, his best friend, his lover, the funniest person he'd ever known, was gone. Forever. And to his own ideas, it was his fault.
His head ached, the room spinning, his fists clenched against his slacks. Y/n used to always tease him about his constant need to dress 'fancy'. In a way he wish he'd taken Y/n's advice and dressed like an 80s virgin. That's what Y/n would've called it, anyway.
"Are you sure?" He was sure this was at least the 3rd time he'd asked his older brother this. It broke his brother all the same, "Yes. You need rest, Regulus. Please." But it wasn't enough for him, he didn't want to rest without Y/n, he didn't want to laugh without Y/n, he didn't want to walk the same Earth Y/n did without Y/n.
Lily, James, Sirius, anyone remotely close to Y/n or himself attended the funeral. That's how Y/n was. Y/n was someone no one could forget, no matter what conversation you'd had with Y/n you remembered. He also knew Y/n's irrational fear of death, the poor thing had been terrified, cried everytime a new year passed, and here he was alive without Y/n.
The thing he hated the most was what had happened, Y/n held his hand and cooed him through death, even though he had never been close to dying in that moment. Y/n always put him on the front burner, it was one thing that made him feel so guilty yet so loved.
As the night faded, and the sun came up it was just him, his brother, and a gravestone. "Regulus, we should go..Y/n needs rest." Sirius knew the man in front of him would never take that as a good reason, obviously the dead aren't sleeping, but he still had to try. He was his big brother after all.
Regulus put a finger up, a finger that said a million words without a noise. Sirius left him, giving him the second alone he'd requested, but he stayed near by out of pure need to keep Regulus safe.
"I suppose this is a second good bye." He cleared his throat, keeping his voice from breaking, "Even now you choke me up, Y/n. I'm sorry. I promised you'd live forever, I promised myself I'd go first to show you it wasn't all that bad. And yet here I am, and there you are." He paused once more, pulling out a singular Pansy from his pocket, "I know you never liked flowers, you said they weren't worth the money, but I think this is a special occasion."
Regulus stood up, looking down on his partner's grave, and sighed. "I love you. I'm sorry I never got the chance to say it back in person." He took one last shakey breath, and set the flower down, "If there ever was a heaven I know you'd be there. I'll see you someday, soon hopefully, my love."
And he set off towards Sirius. They went home in silence, Hogwarts was over for them, it was a journey they'd never thought they'd be in together. Everything they'd planned, Regulus and Y/n, ending with Sirius and Regulus driving no where in particular.
The worse part for Regulus was watching James and Lily from there. They were so in love. Y/n's brother, happy and healthy with someone he loved, and Y/n dead with him left alone. He'd never hate the two, but he'd always envy them.
He began his work for the ministry until his own death came. Perhaps he had never been happier to go, he'd always wanted to go, since Y/n had, but he had never wanted to do it himself, he didn't want Y/n to feel worse about dying than Y/n already would have.
Now it was Sirius crying at his grave. Life has one cruel sense of humor and Sirius had now been dealt this hand twice. Y/n had been his best friend as well, James and Lilly long gone, and now, his baby brother.
"I've never been happier to have the world leave you behind, my love. " Regulus looked at the one who he'd been searching for, for years, the voice of reason to the chaos of himself, Y/n.
Maybe death wasn't all that scary.
#regulus black#Regulus black x reader#sirius black#sirius black x reader#james potter#lilly potter#harry potter drabble#harry potter angst#timothee chalamet#sirius and regulus#Spotify
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josie. answer. ALL the book questions. i want to know
How many books did you read this year?
idk. didn't count. around 20?
Did you reread anything? What?
The Tombs of Atuan by Ursula K Le Guin, sort of. The first time was a listen-through so I missed plenty of it. There are also a handful of Ted Chiang stories that I'd caught online and reread this year 'in-context', so to speak (Ted Chiang's 'The Great Silence'.)
Did you discover any new authors that you love this year?
Ted Chiang, Kazuo Ishiguro (in terms of authors where I finished a book and immediately dug into their other work). There are other authors I first read from this year that I imagine will ultimately be on the same level for me, but they're more slow-burn (Chiang was easy to catch up with because his work is all short stories, for example).
What genre did you read the most of?
Fantasy, in terms of sheer page count - much of my year was taken up by feasting on Robin Hobb's Realm of the Elderlings.
Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?
The books I feel gnawing at me most to seriously get started on are Marlon James' Black Leopard, Red Wolf and Cormac McCarthy's Blood Meridian.
What was your average Goodreads rating? Does it seem accurate?
I need to go get caught up on my Goodreads stuff, then I'll reblog with my answer to this.
Did you meet any of your reading goals? Which ones?
I don't set reading goals.
What was your favourite new release of the year?
I'm not certain that I finished any books that were released in 2023.
What was your favourite book that has been out for a while, but you just now read?
This one might just have to be my answer for top book of the year... it'll have to be either Klara and the Sun or The Secret History.
Any books that disappointed you?
I'd somehow come into Martha Wells' All Systems Red with a vague and totally wrong idea of what Murderbot Diaries was all about. That's not the book's fault, but still, wasn't quite what I was looking for.
What were your least favourite books of the year?
I'm no good at finishing books that I'm not enjoying, so I'm not sure I have anything that would be fair to put here...
What books do you want to finish before the year is over?
I'm answering this ask too late for this one. u_u
Did you read any books that were nominated or won awards this year?
No 2023 books at all for me this year. I think.
What is the most over-hyped book you read this year?
I'm struggling a little to get through Gideon the Ninth, but I've also heard the series doesn't come into its own until Harrow... (and of course I might come around to Gideon by the time I finish it).
Did any books surprise you with how good they were?
Peter S. Beagle's The Last Unicorn, though I've yet to finish it. Turns out that classics are good! I'm somehow shocked every time.
How many books did you buy?
Who are you, a cop?
Did you use your library?
I'm not sure what this one means.
What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations?
Will substitute 'release' for 'read' - Ursula Le Guin's work is consistently pretty great, and I'd been trying to get the motivation to go through her stuff for a while.
Did you participate in or watch any bookblr, booktube, or book twitter drama?
No.
What's the longest book you read?
Unsure, but I'm pretty sure it's one of the Elderling books. Maybe Fool's Fate?
What's the fastest time it took you to read a book?
I was cruising pretty quickly through Elderlings if you judge it by time vs pagecount. Those were about a week each.
What reading goals do you have for next year?
I'm killing time until Seth Dickinson's Exordia, then I'm gonna finish more of the half-read SFF classics I'm procrastinating on.
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Arcana Xayah and Rakan
One half of a perpetually incomplete whole, Xayah has found her love not in the world of the Higher Arcana, but the Lower. As she strains to meet the fated Rakan and pull him upwards towards herself, their tension frays and forms discordant knots—setting the stage for something new.
One half of a perpetually incomplete whole, Rakan's fated love was not in the Lower World, but among the Higher Arcana far above. As the two rush to meet betwixt the lands of their birth, fate bubbles and boils over—a roiling sea from which a new order may emerge.
It’s a double feature!
General Information:
Price: 1350 RP
Tier: Epic
Release Date: April 14, 2022
Skinline: Arcana
Credits (Xayah):
Concept: Yanie Yang
Splash Art: Marie Magny
Model: Siao Sia
Animations: Awen Yu
Tech Art/Rigging: Crane Wang
VFX: Huanmo Ju
SFX: [I wasn't able to find credits for this position]
Artist Lead: Duy Khanh Nguyen
Credits (Rakan):
Concept: Yanie Yang
Splash Art: Marie Magny
Model: Sylph Pang
Animations: Kuma Hu
Tech Art: Rongcheng Sheng, Chen Lai
Rigging: Jason Sun
VFX: Jianqi Huo, Yingfeng Zhao (concept)
SFX: James Shen
Artist Lead: Duy Khanh Nguyen
Concept:
I honestly don’t really understand Arcana’s lore and I find it visually impossible to differentiate between the higher and lower arcana but I can forgive that because I find Broken Covenant to be stylistically worse. Visually, Arcana simply appears more cohesive.
Several of Rakan's and Xayah's skins are based on the star-crossed lovers trope. With that being said, Arcana is at least unique in it not being good vs. evil like Broken Covenant or Star Guardian, but more of a hierarchical difference. It is interesting that in all of these instances, Rakan seems to be the one getting the short end of the stick.
All in all, I haven't really liked any of Xayah's or Rakan's skins since Elderwood but, for Arcana, at least, it is not at the fault of its concept.
Design:
I love the colors. I also love how Xayah’s cape ends are a little sharper than Rakan’s and how whole her cape goes from red to black, Rakan’s is the opposite and goes from black to red. I honestly think Rakan’s design has too much going on, especially in the top half, but it’s much more obvious in his chromas. I do like the stripe on his pants though.
Splash Art:
Thematically, their posing makes sense with Xayah being above Rakan and I do enjoy the half wing imagery with their capes. The issue is that it doesn't look good on the loading screen. The concept arts look so much better and while A is my personal favorite, I do love C's heart frame as well as the implication that Xayah succeeds in ascending Rakan so that they can be together.
Model:
I think Xayah looks absolutely wonderful, mostly staying true to her concept design. I really like the subtle cape changes as well but I’m very happy they kept the gold, feather-like layer at the top. I also quite like how Rakan’s arms turned out but some of the arm bracings do contribute to the noise. And, of course, Rakan wants to be loud and contrasting to Xayah, but I think in the context of this skin it’s better to rely on more subtle differences like the capes. I think having them look so similar and striving for that cohesiveness is done away by having to make Rakan “flashier” simply because he’s Rakan. And I believe that thought extends to their chromas as Xayah utilizes more muted colors in her clothing with occasional brighter hair while Rakan’s chromas are all bright and bold.
Chromas:
I'm not sure how chromas are made, but it's a little disappointing how the colors don't match well to each other despite the base skin accomplishing it fairly well. Something I especially enjoy is their contrasting capes, but the uncoordinated colors don't accomplish the same effect in their chromas.
Catseye: I can excuse the hair colors but Xayah's clothes are much more orange while Rakan's are obviously yellow with purple accents for no reason. His hair also looks really bad.
Obsidian: They look good individually but lack the matching colors.
Pearl: Much more cohesive. Probably their best chroma together. The colors on both are gorgeous and Rakan's hair looks wonderful.
Rose Quartz: Both are nice but the pinks don't match.
Ruby: I really don't understand this one as the base skins are already very red. Xayah just doesn't look good with blonde hair and Rakan has barely changed. Again, their clothes don't match with Xayah's being orange again while Rakan's are almost a pinkish red.
Sapphire: I actually quite like Xayah's. Once again, Rakan's hair looks terrible.
Tanzanite: Once again, the colors don't match. Xayah's is more of a magenta while Rakan's is a much clearer purple. I dislike his hair.
Turquoise (Xayah): Pretty nice.
Emerald (Rakan): Emerald chromas aren't really supposed to look nice, but it's decent.
The biggest issue is that the colors simply don't match and that in giving Rakan the Emerald chroma, they each have a chroma that they cannot match with their partner. I think they did a really good job of contrasting Xayah's hair with her clothes and I appreciate how the colors are quite simple. Rakan, on the other hand, suffers a lot from the two-tone hair and it becomes difficult to make it look nice. Similarly, his much more decorated and complicated attire makes the many accents sort of overtake the chroma. I think the most obvious example of this is in their Sapphire chroma where while Xayah's yellow accents are more minimal, Rakan's are so prominent that they have to extend to his hair.
Animations:
No new animations aside from individual recalls. No new joint recall.
I really love Rakan's recall individually. Xayah's is extremely similar to Ahri's with her spreading out the tarot cards and picking one but their differences in personality are evident.
Side by side, I don't really understand it. I believe the feathers that Rakan catches are meant to represent Xayah, but I find them too bright, especially when compared to the Feathers she drops from her abilities. It also appears that the red crystal in both their recalls is meant to represent Rakan, but without deliberate movements that might suggest he is sending the crystal to Xayah, it appears more that the crystal is also Xayah as it transitions into the feathers.
Overall, I think both recalls could improve with some changes to make it more cohesive and comprehensible. I really enjoy Xayah's movements when the card she picks becomes the crystal, which, if meant to represent both of them, might represent their love
I think the first second of Rakan's recall could then be redone. Rather than him observing himself a the compact mirror and seemingly producing the crystal, the mirror might be repurposed into a locket that, when opened, releases the crystal. I also believe it would be better if their recalls both ended with them holding the crystal. My idea is that he opens the locket, releasing three of Xayah's feathers that he moves to catch and condense to become the crystal and the item he holds to mirror Xayah's recall.
VFX:
I think Rakan's passive effects are beautiful with the red and yellow colors. My favorite ability is probably his W (Grand Entrance). I really enjoy the inclusion of the apple tree that's also present in their splash art, alluding to Xayah's efforts to ascend her lover as well as, of course, the first sin. I also love the charm effects from his R (The Quickness).
Xayah's particle effects are also beautiful. I really love her E (Bladecaller) root effects with the tarot cards floating around her opponent. Similarly, their inclusion in her R (Featherstorm) is also gorgeous.
Rakan's glowing effect on his cape is so well done and I really enjoy how the patterns on both of their capes appear to be moving down like stars falling from the sky with Rakan's being much more rapid than Xayah's. I think it's a wonderful detail. The visual effects are by far the highlight of these skins.
SFX:
Nothing too revolutionary, but they’re nice. You’ll most likely notice the visual effects more but I believe competent sound effects are the backbone of good visual effects.
Voice Over:
No new voice overs.
Value:
I personally would never buy this skin nor Broken Covenant. I think it's ridiculous that you can't get its full value if you choose to play the game effectively and utilize their Lover's Leap passive. I think it's even more ridiculous that Riot not only ignored this feedback, but did the exact opposite and completely scrapped their joint recall animation. I'd like to mention the Redeemed Star Guardian skins but I believe it warrants its own post.
I believe the precedence of Rakan and Xayah having unique joint recall animations was first set with their Sweetheart skins (their release skins, Cosmic, uses the base animation). In that skin, the animation is much simpler than their individual recalls, but still sweet and new. I'm not expecting them to make every new joint recall as elaborate as Elderwood's, but to scrap the idea entirely when Sweetheart Rakan and Xayah exists makes it seem like they're giving up.
#league of legends#league of legends xayah#xayah league of legends#lol xayah#xayah lol#xayah#league of legends rakan#rakan league of legends#lol rakan#rakan lol#rakan#xayah and rakan
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So.....PRISM Zine is a thing and....well....this is from their FAQ. I am just so frustrated by the continued horrific treatment of fans of characters the FNDM has decided cannot be liked because the writers forced CGI characters to do horrible things and generally the fans don’t like said horrible things and liked the character for who they where before that.
Their is also a very frustrating double standard here. Why is James a problem but not Blake, the woman who has repeatedly been abusive to Sun be slapping him and destroying his property?
https://ironpines.tumblr.com/post/656149649860722688/all-right-i-admit-this-is-kind-of-a-hyper-specific
https://www.google.com/amp/s/itsclydebitches.tumblr.com/post/181967247810/blake-hitting-sun-was-the-result-of-a/amp
https://mobile.twitter.com/CJ_Black0/status/1210777853639348231
The answer is, Blake is a female and one of the mains, so therefore the abuse and harm she causes doesn’t matter and is even applauded and explained away. We’re supposed to loath James because he was trying to save who he could and didn’t think he could save everyone and therefore think the horific and ableist writing is fine. But Blake just slaps someone because he followed her because he was concerned and it’s fine apparently . Again the following her is not okay but SLAPPING HIM is never an okay response or did we all conveniently forget the absolute moral outrage that exploded across the internet with the whole Will Smith debacle. I am not going to go into my thoughts on that situation but the thing is, people thought the appropriate response to a slap is to be banned for 10 years from the Oscars. Why the ever loving fuck is Blake allowed to slap someone THREE times and have it hand waved off and treated as if it is nothing? The double standard on this stuff is so beyond frustrating and I am sick and tired of it. Why am I not allowed to love James without being outright banned from shit that is supposed to be all things RWBY?
Why does loving James apparently give people the right to send me death threats and harass me and then tell me its my fault? Can we just let people love the characters they love and not shame them and ban them from events because these are fictional characters and you don’t necessarily know why they love said character and telling someone is wrong for loving a fictional character is harmful and tells people certain characteristics are wrong if their favorite character has those traits but tis wrong to love them.
#RWDE#James Ironwood#Pro James Ironwood#Pro ironwood#Ironwood Protection Squad#General ironwood#General Dadmiral#FNDM drama#FNDM behaving badly
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I agree with your thing about the black brothers, like from someone who has two siblings, one of which I am estranged from. My sister (who I'm not estranged from) has said some shitty things to me, we have gotten in to some fights in our lives but I can not imagine not talking to her
It took a LOT for my brother and I to become estranged and it's only because it is literally not safe for me to have any sort of relationship with him
Alls that being said, the idea that Sirius would just give up on his BABY brother solely because he got sorted into a different house is idiotic. Especially if you agree with the idea that their home was abusive. I feel like Sirius would be SO protective of Regulus and yes I think they drive each other crazy but you can't tell me he was just like "nah fuck this guy we aren't brothers anymore" at 12
I also have seen the hc that Sirius slightly agreed (or maybe didn't agree but thought it was just true) with blood supremacy before he started at hogwarts just because it was all he had ever known and had a hard time the first year or so at hogwarts and his friends were the ones who helped him come to terms with the fact that like no that's not cool
And I think that Sirius understood at least to a degree why Regulus still had those ideas from home and then being reinforced in his house at school. You can't tell me he gave up on him instead of trying to get through to him. I feel like Sirius fought for Regulus literally until he died and you can not convince me otherwise
Anyway, as someone with siblings, I feel like jkr writes siblings in such an unrealistic way and it's super aggravating
*flings self into sun* anon, after my own heart. i didn't come on here with the intention of unraveling all these ties but HERE WE ARE.
yes to estrangement. like you're telling me...the Weasleys wrote off Percy because he...*checks notes* got...a job??? because he had bills to pay?
so i've said before, and i'll say it again, that a big reason why i started writing fic is because i got so tired of seeing Marauders At Hogwarts writing sirius as a rebel without a cause at 11. and i know we see bits of baby sirius on the train in "canon", but its a GLIMPSE and it's told through Snapes POV who is...dlksaf;jdfaskf.
Sirius was raised in a home where pureblood mania was shoved down his throat, and that was it. he got no other view points, no other anything other than Blacks are Best and everyone who errs is incorrect. The arrogance we see in Sirius as a character??? Where do we think that comes from???
Hogwarts was a learning curve for Sirius!! I believe he was sorted into Gryffindor because of his heart and his character and the hat seeing something that even baby sirius couldn't see. and you can bet sirius said "mudblood" at least once and james potter was there like "okay, no, that's not the vibe, muggleborn works" and sirius was like "...huh, i literally never knew there was another word for it. because i was only TOLD there was one word." and adapts!!!
So he GETS regulus. he GETS it. and it takes time and years for sirius to unlearn most of it, and he learns through James and Remus and the rest of his gryffindors, and he knows that he would be regulus if he was in Slytherin!! HE KNOWS. So no, he's not just going to abandon ship, and i really truly think a lot of time at #12 was spent talking to reg like "Hey, no, look at what Im learning!" (which makes sense, you know considering, how reg died etc etc...). Sirius was protective to a fault.
PROTECTIVE. TO. A FAULT.
Soft idiot brother.
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I've started a class on US history ( particularly around the colonization ) and it's fascinating! Do you have any period you would recommend to look more into?
You picked an interesting time to ask me about US history, through absolutely no fault of your own! (I haven't studied US history since high school, and my AP US History teacher has spent the last 20 or so years in jail for, uh... having relationships with little boys that were 100% NOT OKAY. And I recently found out he's out of prison and has been attempting to track down some of the boys involved [who are all now in their 30s and 40s]. I only know because one is one of my old roommates, and he was dating my best friend, and... well. I saw his name on the list and was just like "okay, this has to be a parole violation of some sort. Also, dude, what the actual fuck?! Several of the boys you hurt later committed suicide. One was found dead by his little sister and her best friend. They were nine. Nine years old. You are a fucking monster. Jesus christ.")
Aside from that... I'm not super well-versed in US history as a whole, but I have enjoyed some books dealing with it, so okay if I mention those? I particularly loved A People's History of the United States (Howard Zinn) and Lies My Teacher Told Me (James Loewen), both of which were seminal in presenting less "whitewashed" versions of US history. I've also enjoyed in recent years The Warmth of Other Suns by Isabel Wilkerson (about the disapora of Black Americans from the Southeast into the Midwest during the 20th century), The American West and Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee, both by Dee Brown (classics of the expansion of settlers into the West in the 19th century, the "cowboy" years), and White Trash by Nancy Isenberg (looking at class in America). Other good, popular writers of US history: David McCullough, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Ron Chernow, Candice Millard. There's some awesome fiction that tackles US history in interesting ways - my favorites are A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith), The Little Friend (Donna Tartt), Forever (Pete Hamill), The Jungle (Upton Sinclair), and basically anything by Steinbeck.
I find the great migration periods particularly interesting, especially the Asian arrivals in the West in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. Early Hollywood is fascinating. There's a wonderful book about it called Silent Stars by Jeanine Basinger. The US also has some honest really good classics in True Crime, especially Truman Capote's In Cold Blood and Norman Mailer's The Executioner's Song. (Truman Capote is also interesting in that he was a very good friend of Harper Lee, who wrote To Kill a Mockingbird.) There were some writers in the mid-20th century who took travel writing and turned it on its head: try Travels with Charley (Steinbeck again!), On the Road (Jack Kerouac - not my personal style, but I understand why it's an American classic!), and Roughing It (Mark Twain). (Honestly, all of Twain's stuff is great, and fucking hilarious. Twain and Wodehouse - in England - had no business being as brilliantly hilarious as they were.)
Also, a weirder rec?
Stephen King's 11/22/63.
Just trust me. And yes, it's that Stephen King.
Again: trust me.
(Other fictional creepiness built around or dealing with North American history [I say North American because I'm including Canada and Mexico]: Alma Katsu's The Hunger, Dan Simmons' The Terror, Silvia Moreno-Garcia's Mexican Gothic [and I just got her Velvet was the Night, but haven't read it yet!], Toni Morrison's Beloved, basically anything by Cormac McCarthy. [Content warning, some of these are a little stomach-churning to get through. Reader beware!] I've also recently been recommended S. Craig Zahler's Westerns, but haven't read them yet, so be warned there that he's the guy who wrote Bone Tomahawk! If you know... you know. If you don't... not recommended viewing while eating. 🤷♀️ And speaking of Westerns, Larry McMurtry's Lonesome Dove is absolutely wonderful. And not stomach-churning!)
Hope that helps! If there are any specific periods that catch your interest, I can dig into recommendations for further reading/watching. US history isn't always my personal cup of tea, but my mother's been writing books and articles about it for 30 years, so I can always ask for recs! 😁
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Come Join the Murder- Chapter 13: Part II A Quiet Time
Start from the beginning here
Gryffindor came back into view, the small town still rather lively despite the setting sun. Sirius clicked his tongue, attempting to direct his horse over towards the hitch by the hotel. The unruly creature stomped its hooves into the dirt, tossing its head back with irritation.
“I don’t think he much cares for you,” Remus chuckled.
With a sharper tug on the reins, Sirius finally managed to maneuver around the path. “I can assure you the feeling is mutual.”
“Ain’t a cowboy and his horse s’posed to get along?”
“Aye,” Sirius grumbled. “Lost my best horse in the mayhem out of Godric’s Hollow.”
“Don’t let him fool you, Moony,” James added, coming up beside them and petting Monty fondly. “Padfoot here’s never had luck with a horse. Never lasts more than a few weeks before the beasts get fed up with him and toss him.”
“Not my fault they’re sneaky bastards!”
Remus laughed behind him and Sirius felt a shiver down his spine at the way his breath ghosted over the back of his neck. “Just means you haven’t found the right one yet. Havin’ the right horse with ya makes all the difference in the world.”
“Well, by all means, horse master, Moony. Find me a horse that won’t throw me in the air and I may just make you a king.”
“That right,” Remus said, his voice lower and barely breathed passed his ear.
Sirius did fidget in his saddle then, his fingers instinctively tightening around the reins. Clearing his throat, he tried to shake the feelings stirring in his chest. “Alright, before we find ourselves ass up in the whiskey, I think I owe you a favor, Moony.”
“Me?”
Stopping his horse in front of the hitching post, Sirius swung his leg over, careful not to knock Remus off and already missing the warmth of his fingers on his hips. “I think saving my life has earned you a bit more than a whiskey bath- how about a real one?”
Remus’s eyes widened for only a second before he, rather ungracefully, also dismounted. Looking up, he seemed to register that they were in front of the hotel. “Oh shit, you mean with hot water and all?”
Sirius clapped a hand to Remus’s shoulder, who stumbled slightly from the impact. “Well, it is repayment for my life after all. Worth more than just an old bar of soap and a cold lake, don’t ya think.”
“Sure, sure, whatever,” Remus said, already walking towards the entrance. “Just give the man the money and let me wash away this fuckin’ stink.”
Sirius and James both laughed, following behind.
“Think I could use one as well,” Sirius said, nodding his head at James in question as he placed several coins on the front counter. “How ‘bout you, Prongs?”
“Nah, I’m good. Think I might run to the shop right quick while you two pamper yourselves, though.”
Sirius gave him a small salute before turning to gesture Remus on towards the hallway that the bathing rooms resided. Pulling open one of the doors, Sirius grinned. “See you on the other side?”
“I don’t know, might just live in here forever,” he said, already pulling several bottles off the shelves.
“Can’t do that now, we still gotta get good and plastered, Moony!”
“Fine, fine. Now leave me be, I’m going to see how many different flowers I can come out smelling like.”
Sirius threw his head back in laughter, delighting in the slightly crooked grin Remus threw at him. James had been right, those dimples were downright deadly.
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the insider— elijah young
Welcome to Coolsville, the best little small town in Ohio.
…except for right now, but that’s not really ELIJAH YOUNG’S ( MICHAEL EVANS BEHLING ) fault, is it? Known as the INSIDER around town, HE is just your friendly neighborhood DEPUTY SHERIFF. Sure he can be BRUSQUE and SCATTERBRAINED, but he can also be DEPENDABLE and EARNEST just like any other 23 year old. That doesn’t mean he has anything to do with our string of recent chilling events, though… right?
book currently sitting at the bottom of his jansport: normal people by sally rooney ( he thinks he’s a man of taste, it’s the latest book gabby’s left on the passenger side seat )
superlative(s): best eyes, tallest in class, most likely to sleep through an earthquake
current quote: candid pics? no, take cryptid pics of me. make me as blurry as possible. my eyes glow. i’m in places i can’t logically be in.
tv parallels: kronk ( the emperor’s new groove ), guillermo ( what we do in the shadows ), ruthie ( shrill ), stan ( good girls...before it went to shit ), a sprinkle of parrish ( teen wolf ), a dash of james mcguire ( derry girls ), jake peralta ( brooklyn 99 ), jim ( the office )
current brands he's loving: he doesn’t fucking know, the gap? dickies?
full name: elijah nathaniel young
age: twenty-three ( born december 20th, 1998 )
zodiac: sagittarius and that’s all he knows...ask his sister about the rest
occupation & goals: deputy sheriff...reluctantly & well, he wanted to be a firefighter but that didn’t happen so idk, it’s not like he wants to make chief.
001. Eli Young was one half of a matching set, but you’d never hear him complain about it; if anyone had been there for him throughout the rollercoaster that was life, it was his twin. He thinks the two of them spent most of their childhood stranded on an island in the middle of the turbulent sea that was their home. To hear their mother tell it, their parents fought hard but loved harder— she’d told her children that those were two sides of the same coin, but Eli never thought it made much sense.
002. Still, he’d always feared that he could be just as angry, just as volatile as his mother and father had been. Elijah had felt it building beneath his skin when someone had yanked his sister’s hair or when that one bully had shoved him a little too hard during recess. He knew what he could be, and he knew it wasn’t the person he wanted to become— but it wasn’t always easy. For all of elementary and most of middle school, the people that would push Elijah would be pushed back twice as hard.
003. All the same, everyone needs outlets, right? He’d picked up a string of them: played the drums in a band once, lost interest and then moved on to bass; volleyball didn’t manage to keep his interest and neither did swimming, but he’d try anything once. The only consistent roles in his life were ‘son of the chief deputy,’ ‘the taller twin,’ and ‘that one kid all the grandmas like’. Elijah hated the former but took the latter in stride, he’d wanted to be that kid more than anything else.
004. In high school he joins the track team, because testosterone is at its highest, and he can’t find a better way to let off steam ( he’d never really liked football all that much ). He runs in the mornings before the sun is out, and is always the last to leave the field after practice— he’d probably been trying to spend as much time away from home as possible. It was obvious that his father wanted him to join the Sheriff’s Department as soon as he was able but Elijah didn’t even like cops.
005. That was a common thing in the Young home, with their father complaining about how unappreciated he was as a cop, and Elijah holding his tongue in response. Sometimes Eli thought the man did it on purpose, bringing up random points he knew would make his son uncomfortable. If his father wanted to make him feel bad about his constitution, it worked ( for the most part ), but Eli would just as quickly turn around and complain about the expectations hanging in the home.
006. He ran his mouth like the best of them, but sometimes it was all he did; that was cowardice for ya. Elijah would say he’d never join the force; he didn’t want to be like his father, or his uncles or their fathers or anyone else for that matter. And yet he found himself taking the test ( for formalities really, when your dad is chief, you get the job ). Next thing you know, he’s on the same trajectory as his father had been, and still was. Every day he puts on his uniform he feels like he’s drowning.
007. One silver lining is that Elijah’s always been a helper, that kid all the grandmas like. As a deputy, he’s given all those inconsequential calls, non-emergency situations where he spends half of the time rectifying the issue and the other half making conversation. He’s a people person at his core, and that part of the job doesn’t make it so bad. But he sure as hell isn’t making a difference and he sure as hell wishes he were making idle conversation over something else.
008. Must be why he acts out at work, pushing against ‘efforts’ made when a girl goes missing because it’s not enough, he knows it isn’t. Elijah sees firsthand how his colleagues work through this case with lethargy and tunnel vision; he sees how they’ve exhausted their efforts after the first forty-eight hours. He knows the statistics, ( they’ve been drilled into this skull ), but it doesn’t even feel like they’re trying anymore, why arrest some girl who doesn’t know any more than they do?
009. Some decisions in life make themselves, and some come running right at you. He’d been pouring over the case files on his own before that group came barreling into the Sheriff’s Office, some familiar faces but none he’d thought would hang with one another just because ( he’d had eyes and ears in high school, like everyone else ). Seriously, the mayor’s daughter coming to bail out that other girl that somehow became their prime suspect? How did that even happen?
010. What happens after could cost him his job, but then again, he’s not all that attached to it. For once he’s the last one in the office, slipping the case file into his Jansport before cutting off the lights. He’s fond of those inconsequential non-emergencies, but in doing this he feels like he’s actually doing something important— more than his father and everyone else is doing anyhow. Whatever happens after, it was probably meant to be. He’d needed a new outlet anyhow.
&&. he’s got a ton of those enamel pins on the lapels of his deputy uniform, because he stands for all of that and also because he wants to rile up the old assholes in the office: a pride flag, a blm flag and his favorite, which stands for nothing at all, the kermit pin.
&&. the man is a collector and he’s been collecting those sappy novels on the low— blame his sister for leaving that one jodi picoult novel in his car ( he read it as a joke until it wasn’t )…and gabby kept leaving books after and he thinks she’s just going and doing it on purpose now.
&&. he’s gone to all the little hole in the wall places and posted about their shitty food. and he’s consistently going to the pub and trying out their even shittier food and blasting them on the internet because they never learn…everyone knows he runs this blog but he won't ‘come clean’.
&&. he’s got a lot of snacks in his Jansport, and a tool box because you really never know. you gotta be prepared for anything? even though he’s sitting on his ass most of the time, but you just really never know. especially now that he’s running with pseudo-vigilantes.
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unwanted feelings
james potter x reader
description - You'd had a crush on James Potter for years and when he kisses Lily Evans in front of you, you are heart broken. Later you find that he didn't actually feel as you expected and he explains himself.
warnings - some angst, unsure reader, fem pronouns, self doubt, negative self talk, not eating for a day cause reader is avoiding someone
word count - 2800
A/N - so this one isn't my best work by far but i wrote it so looks like its getting posted. i don't know why all of my reader inserts lately are so fem and sort of bubbly, i guess it's sort of what i'm aiming for for myself right now but i'm sorry if it maybe isn't coming off as relatable.
MASTERLIST
Your throat tightened in anxiety as you watched James zoom around the pitch. He was reckless when he was playing quidditch and it was one of the things that made him great at the game and an excellent captain. It was also the thing that nearly gave you a heart attack every time you watched him play. You went to every one of his games and you always wore something of his with his colors when you were in the stands. You were stood up on your seat and a slightly bored looking Remus sat to your right, reading from a book you didn't recognize. You'd thought that Sirius playing would be enough to keep him interested but sports was just not something he enjoyed watching. You were usually that way as well but whenever James was playing, suddenly you were the most intent spectator in the stands.
You were more worried than you should have been. More worried than what was appropriate for a friend to be. That's what you were, friends. That had been reinforced many times by the shaggy haired boy and you tried desperately to get it through your head before you embarrassed yourself one of these days. Sometimes though, you just couldn't help it.
Really you might have thought he reciprocated if you didn't know any better. You often got comments on what an attractive couple you guys were but each time it was quickly corrected by James. Normally along the lines of 'Oh god no, we are just friends. Purely platonic' , sometimes followed by a shudder or a gag even. It upset you every time to no end but you played along. You rarely, if ever, contributed to the shooting down of any feelings but that was never noticed by the man you had feelings for.
You'd had a crush on him since you were probably in your second year and now you were coming to the middle of your seventh. There were a million times that you almost said something but every time there was a reminder that you were not the one he had eyes for. It usually took the shape of disgust at the thought of dating you or commentary as he pined over the Evans girl who you felt you could never compete with. How could you when she was just perfect. You saw her to the left of you as she stood in the stands as well and your hands shook with insecurity before looking back toward the game. Your heart raced nearly as quickly as James did around the pitch and you prayed that the snitch would be caught soon so that you could get rid of the stress surrounding you. You felt a hand on your right shoulder and you looked over to find Remus had stood and was looking at you caringly.
"Are you alright, Y/N?" He asked softly and you tried your very best to soften your gaze and calm your stance so you appeared less concerned with someone that you shouldn't have that much interest in in the first place.
"Of course I am. When am I not?" You smiled before looking out at the pitch.
"When youre watching the guy you're in love with play a dangerous game that you don't like." He stated simply in response to the question you meant to be rhetorical and your eyes widened.
"I don't know what youre talking about." You nearly whispered and Remus smiled.
"I'm not gonna tell anyone Y/N but its not exactly subtle. It probably doesn't help that I know the look on your face because it's how I feel too watching Sirius play." He was still smirking but your anxiety was far from eased.
"Oh god, does he know?" You asked scaredly, terrified that the answer would be yes and you would have to stop spending time with him.
"Shockingly, no." You sighed out in relief but Remus continued. "You should tell him though or else he might end up moving on."
"What do you mean? There's nothing for him to move on from. Everyone knows he's in love with Evans and he has made it pretty clear that he is opposed to being anything more than a friendly relationship with me." You choked out, struggling with the words leaving your lips but knowing them to be true.
"I mean he has a minor crush on Evans but it's nothing compared to the annoyingly huge crush he has on you. He's probably just overcompensating for the fact that he's insecure and doesn't want you to reject him."
"Why are you telling me this?" You asked sincerely. You were friends with Remus as you were with the rest of the marauders but it was nothing compared to the friendship they held within their group. You knew Remus was more loyal to James than to you so you couldn't understand why, if it was true, Remus would be telling you at all.
"Because he is trying desperately to move on seeing as he is under the impression that you aren't into him and I'd hate to see him throw something away that could be really good for him." Remus smiled gently and you looked at him gratefully.
"I really appreciate you telling me and all but I just don't think I can believe you. I can't even count how many times he has made a big show of not liking me. I love him too much to ruin what we have and I know that if I confessed and it went bad that I would lose him all together. I would rather have him in my life in a way that hurts than not have him in it at all." You stated sadly and Remus sighed but nodded in understanding.
"I get it but just know that I'm being honest and pretty soon he is going to give up on it. I just want to see you both happy but if its too big of a leap, I understand. That's exactly the excuse he tells the rest of us too."
Suddenly cheers erupted from the stands, cutting your conversation with Remus off as everyone ran to rush the pitch. The snitch had been caught and gryffindor won. You were excited for James but you were also a little terrified to walk onto the pitch to see him with the now conflicted thoughts running through your head. Your thoughts were stopped by the image in front of you which was causing the whole crowd to cheer. James had pulled Lily Evans into a kiss in his excitement and your heart stopped. You felt nausea rise in your throat and Remus caught your eye with a sympathetic look. You didn't look at him for longer than a second and you ran off the pitch with tears streaming down your face. You found your way up to your dorm, pushing yourself to get there quickly before the common room filled with students celebrating their victory. James was always one to love attention so he would be getting crazy after the game which he did just about every time they won.
When you made it to your bed, you hurried under the covers, throwing the shirt you were wearing which belonged to James onto the floor. You felt your heart clench at the despair you felt. You wanted to be upset at Remus for getting your hopes up but you knew he was sincere in his want to help. Still you felt that you would probably not be able to face James in the weeks to come. Maybe, given a little time, you could be around him and not be upset at the world for taking away your chance with him. As you laid in your bed, you stared at the ceiling. You felt tears streaming down your face and you grew angry at yourself. He didn't owe you anything, he wasn't into you. That wasn't his fault and it was so unfair of you to expect anything more from him when your feelings were not his responsibility.
You weren't sure how long you laid there but you could hear the party start and end in the common room. It must have been late. Sleep wouldnt come though, you could just feel your heart continue to break and you were stuck in a loop of self pity. You made the decision that the following days would be spent away from James if you could at all help it. That was probably what he wanted anyway and it was the only way that you would get over the pain you were feeling. At some point your roomates entered your dorm and sleep overtook you for a few restless hours.
When you woke up, the sun was barely on the rise. You hurried up and got dressed and ready. You were planning on getting to breakfast early to avoid running into any of the marauders. You found your plans were not going how you wanted when you entered the great hall to find a head of red hair next to a mop of black. Your throat tightened and you quickly moved to turn and head out of the great hall. You heard a familiar voice call your name but you rushed out before you could give it too much thought. You knew that if you let him try to convince you, you would end up having a very upsetting breakfast with your best friend and his new lover. You would rather avoid breakfast.
Throughout the day, avoiding James was proving to be harder than you had thought it would be. You had many of your classes with him and you even sat next to him in a few. He was insistently trying to get you to open up about why you were suddenly so closed off to him but you remained shut off, reassuring him that nothing was wrong and you were just a little tired from the game the day before. You avoided lunch for the same reason as you had avoided breakfast and you felt yourself starting to get a bit lightheaded. Your afternoon was spent avoiding James but soon he was preoccupied with Lily anyway.
You were hid in a corner of the library when a cough alerted you of someone's presence. You looked up to find the very eyes you hadn't wanted to see.
You pushed it down with a gulp and smiled a bit at him, trying desperately to keep the tears at bay but they were growing harder to hold back after keeping everything pent up all day. It probably didn't help that you were hungry and therefor a bit more emotional. You could feel the tears sitting in your eyes, waiting for something to go wrong so they had an excuse to escape you.
"I don't know what I did wrong." He mumbled while looking at the floor in front of you and you took a deep breath.
"There's nothing wrong James, I promise. It's just been a long day." You smiled and your heart picked up speed.
"Since when did we lie to each other?" He questioned and your heart stopped. You were left unsure how to respond.
"Since the truth would cause more damage than good." You spoke honestly. At this he looked up at you and your eyes met. A tear left you and James immediately moved to comfort you but you tried to move away, standing quickly to evade him. You regretted it as spots filled your vision, the lack of food catching up to you. You know that you turned a bit green for a moment because James looked slightly scared.
"Y/N I dont know whats wrong but you look like you should be getting to the hospital wing. You don't look well."
Before you could answer you felt your vision blacken and your legs give out before your consciousness left you completely.
When you woke up, you knew you were in the hospital wing. It smelled sterile and the bed was stiff underneath you. When you started to wake madam pomfrey came to check on you.
"You can't go around with an empty stomach like that again, do you hear me?" She scolded, though her eyes were soft. You nodded solemnly. "I was alerted that you hadn't been to the great hall to eat all day, you have to know that isn't good for you. I'm gonna have a prefect watch out for you the next couple days to make sure you're eating at meal times. Understood?" She asked again and once more you nodded before leaning back and sighing. You looked at your surroundings and were surprised to see the black haired boy next to your bed fast asleep. Your heart took off again and you felt trapped by your environment. As anxiety swirled around in your chest, James had woken up a bit.
"You're awake." James sighed, laced with relief. You still wouldn't make eye contact with him. You felt the bed dip as he sat on it and you looked up to watch him put his head in his hands as he leaned over. You felt guilt fill your chest more than it already had from hating that you felt any claim over the man in front of you. You knew you were in the wrong and the last thing you wanted was to cause him any pain. "Remus talked to me." He almost whispered.
At that moment, you wished you could have apparated to anywhere else in the world. You looked back down at your lap and tears were once again brought to your eyes. You felt betrayal that Remus would reveal your feelings to James.
"I'm sorry." You apologized and you fiddled with your fingers.
"Why are you the one apologizing, I'm the one whos behaved poorly." He assures and you shake your head.
"That's not fair to yourself. You're allowed to want to be with whomever you want and my feelings should have no effect on that. You've made it clear for years that you weren't interested in me and it is my fault that I couldn't take a hint. I'm so sorry." You gushed out and tears started to fall from your eyes. You felt James get up from your bed and you prepared him to leave but instead you felt arms wrap around you and a kiss came to your head.
"Y/N I have had feelings for you for years. I was just always too scared for myself to even consider that you might feel the same." He whispered out but you felt only a different kind of pain. Even though he had now admitted his feelings, he was still dating Lily. Not you. Almost as if he could hear your thoughts he spoke quietly. "I broke it off with Evans." You pulled away immediately.
"What? Why would you do that?" You asked quickly and before he had a chance to answer you feared the worst. "Oh god is it because of me? James please dont let my feelings have any bearing on who you want to date, I can't stand the thought of being the reason you broke up. Even if we do have feelings for each other, you deserve a chance with Lily if that's what you want."
"It was mutual, actually. She understood that I had feelings for you and she said she had a crush on someone else. It just seemed like I had kissed her a bit rashly on the quidditch pitch and we agreed that we shouldn't have gotten together in the first place. It was only a day anyway." He reassured as he explained himself and you calmed a bit.
"So what does this mean." You got out, almost inaudibly.
"It means that, if you'll have me, I'd like to take you out on a date." He stated as if it were the simplest thing in the world and you almost couldn't believe your ears. Before you were even thinking you were nodding quickly, causing spots to once again fill your vision and James grabbed your shoulders to stabilize you before you both laughed. He pulled you by your shoulders toward him and he caught your lips in a kiss that somehow expressed all of the years of repressed feelings. When he pulled away he smiled at you and sat back on your bed. He spent the rest of the day with you in the hospital wing talking about all of the places he was going to take you in the coming weeks.
#harry potter imagine#harry potter x reader#hp imagine#hp x reader#the marauders#marauders imagine#marauders x reader#marauders era#james potter#james potter x reader#james potter imagine#james potter fluff#harry potter fluff#james potter angst#hp angst#hp fluff
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Of Kings and Beasts - Nine
Pairing: King!Bucky X Princess!Reader X King!Steve
Summary: Born a bastard of the King of Orlen, you’re thrust to the West to marry the Kings. However, the greeting you get is anything but warm, and your life with the King is far from enjoyable. He knows it isn’t your fault his husband is gone, but that fact alone won’t prevent him from taking it out on you.
Warnings: Angst, Injuries, Fluff, Language, Violence,
Word Count: 2.9K
A/n: Another chapter is finished!! I’ve got an idea but it’s SO DANGEROUS AND Y’ALL MIGHT HATE ME IF I DO IT BUT ITS SO TEMPTING AND I THINK I’M GONNA DO IT ahem anyway I hope you guys enjoy this!
A/n 2: I’m posting this before work so I’ll reply to asks and comments when I get home tonight! Also, I’ve got the next part of Gangsta written up if y’all want that.... hehe
THIS SERIES CONTAINS SMUT AND DARK THEMES THAT MAY BE TRIGGERING TO SOME AUDIENCES!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!
Series Masterlist
~*~
“How have you been adjusting to this new home?” Thor asks one morning, a smile on his face. You grin back at him, the weight of Acadia lifted off your shoulders as you take a sip of your tea.
“Quite well. Although Loki has been an interesting addition.” The raven-haired man looks up from his book momentarily and gives you a look, to which you only smile.
From the moment you entered the cottage you knew it would be good for you to stay here.
“Well, we are at your disposal. I will have to go back to Asgard within the weeks to come, but Loki and the Valkyrie shall remain here should you need or want them.” You nod gratefully, looking out the window and pursing your lips as you watch the women spar outside.
“What? What is it?” Thor asks, following your gaze.
“I want to learn to defend myself. To wield a sword and fight off an attacker.” Loki scoffs from where he sits, his nose still buried deep in his book.
“For what reason should a queen wish to learn to fight? You will always have men for that.” Your defence is up in an instant, and you clench your jaw before composing yourself enough to reply.
“I do think that considering both my upbringing and the way I have been treated in my new kingdom, I have every right to want to learn to defend myself. I have many reasons to want to defend myself, none of which concern you, however, if you had the slightest idea of all that I have endured in my short time as queen you would not question me wanting to learn to defend myself. I have been shunned from my palace because my husbands fear someone will kill me. My own husbands have brought me far more pain than I would like to admit. I have every right to wish to learn how to defend myself and I will not hear a word from you about the subject!”
His brows raise to nearly his hairline and he looks between you and his brother before burying his nose back in his book, which elicits a chuckle from the blond king.
“If the situation is so severe that I need be sent away for my own safety, I need to learn to defend myself.”
Thor nods, a strong hand patting your shoulder comfortingly.
“I knew there was a fire in you. I could see it in those eyes when you spoke of running from the Kings. I just needed to find it.” He rises to his feet and straightens his clothing. “Loki does have a special talent for pulling the fire from even the most docile creatures. But I will go speak with the valkyrie. They will be delighted to have a student to train.”
He leaves the cottage to interrupt the sparring outside, and you feel your heart skip a beat at the first piece of control that you will have over your life.
~*~
“If that will be all, You are dismissed,” King Steven says, his voice low and exhausted. The royal adviser bows then heads to the door, hesitating for a moment.
“Forgive me, Your Majesties, but I cannot help but notice the absence of the Queen. Where has she gone?” It’s not the first time they’ve gotten the question in the week that you've been gone, therefore they already have their excuse rehearsed and perfected.
“We simply have no use for her. If she cannot even bear our children then what use is she to us?” Comes Steve’s practiced response.
“We were instructed to find a queen who could produce strong heirs. Our wife cannot. So she is no longer of use to us,” James adds, his voice dripping in boredom as he looks over a document on his desk.
The royal advisor nods then excuses himself, bustling to his own office with newfound haste and purpose.
“It’s been a week and we are no closer to finding who it is than we were when she was here,” Steve murmurs after a long moment of silence, his shoulders heavy with the weight of their decision.
“I’m beginning to question whether it was a good decision to send her along with Thor. Especially after he threatened to make her a queen of his own. What if she were to agree?” James stands up and walks over to his husband, taking his shaking hands in his own and sighing.
“I would not blame her if she were to agree. We have treated her like a prisoner. I have... brutalized her and beaten her and I will never be able to repent. If she were to want him I would in no way blame her. He has provided her with a safe haven. She can confide in him and trust him in a way that she may not be able to again with us.” Steve sniffles and squeezes his eyes shut.
“We need to find who it is that has caused this and we need to make them pay.” James nods, smoothing his thumbs over the back of his husband’s hands.
“We will. But until we do, we must remain strong. The Doctor is recovering and when he is fully recovered we will ask him who it was that attacked him. We will find who is behind this, but we must be patient.”
~*~
“Again!” You raise your sword just in time to block a blow from one of the Valkyrie, grinding your teeth together as you push her back a step then swipe your own sword at her throat.
She hops backward, eyebrows raised in surprise.
“You are learning, Your Majesty. But you still hold back. Why? You cannot be afraid to hurt us,” The Captain says, walking forward and looking at you closely.
“You must show no mercy. Not when you must choose between your own life and the life of someone who means to do you harm. You will fight and you will fight to the death.”
Your entire body is burning with the exertion but you hold your ground, raising your sword and ready to go again.
“That’s what I like to see! Now, we go again!” Brunnhild exclaims, a grin on her face as she takes her fighting stance.
It’s just over two weeks since you began your training and everyone is surprised at how quickly you’re picking up on what’s being taught, but none more than you.
You’re just stepping out of the bath, muscles aching with a new type of strength that the Valkyrie have been beating into you, when your eyes catch a glimpse of movement at the window to your bedroom. A figure clad in all black is moving swiftly away from the cottage and disappearing into the darkness of woods, the setting sun aiding in the camouflage of the person.
Thinking that it’s none other than Loki going to wreak havoc on some poor defenceless wanderers, you don’t question it. Instead, you get dressed into a soft Asgardian gown and start preparing yourself for bed.
You’re just about ready to settle down with a book when a flash of white catches your eye from the window. You hesitantly investigate, heart hammering in your chest as you see a letter tucked securely in the window.
You open it and snatch the envelope before it can be taken by the wind, then shut the window again.
The seal on the envelope is that of Acadia, and your heart is in your throat as you realize that this could very well be a letter from the Kings. You’ve no idea what it may say, and cannot decide if you are more nervous or excited as you open it.
The script is not one you recognize, but your eyes greedily devour every word, the smile fading from your face at what lies on the page in your hand.
Thor finds you sometime later seated on the floor, the letter gripped tightly in your hands and your eyes focused on a point on the wall.
“(Y/n?” He asks softly, knocking against the doorframe to try and get your attention. You make no indication that you’ve heard him.
He enters the room, brows furrowed as he sees what you’re holding. “What is that? What does it say? Is it from the Kings?”
It takes a very long moment, but eventually, you find the strength to speak. But even then your voice is a weak rasp.
“Did you know the truth? Did you hide it from me as well?” Thor is beyond confused as he approaches you, taking the page from you and reading through the contents quickly.
‘Your Majesty,
Do not ask who I am nor how I know where you are, just know that you need be more careful who it is you call your lovers. They have sent you away, not for your own protection but because you failed at the task they wanted you for. They have sent you away because you failed to bear their children, this I promise I have heard with my own ears. I know not what they have told you but it is what I have witnessed. They have said this directly and I have heard it with my very own ears. You would do well to stay away from them, for they are dangerous. But I am certain that you and your late child are more than aware of that.
Consider this a warning, your majesty, for I know you are unsafe. You must take care and be far more careful of who you allow in your court.’
“Loki!” The prince is in the room within the same moment, his eyes full of confusion.
“Have the Valkyrie secure the area and find me the man who sent this! Travel to Acadia and alert the Kings. The Queen is no longer safe here.”
You’re confused. If the kings have directly told someone this, why then is Thor responding in such a way?
Loki is on horseback heading towards Acadia only moments later, and Thor is leaving the room as soon as the Valkyrie enter.
Brunnhild crouches next to you, a frown on her face as she glances at the note on the floor, its words echoing in your ears.
“Do not allow this to scare you, Your majesty. Do not give them the satisfaction of that.” You scoff and shake your head at her, “it is far easier said than done. All my life I have been punished for ever speaking, much less standing my ground. I have perfected the art of cowering, for men wish to do nothing but hurt and maim all so they can gain power.”
She sits down and shakes her head, taking your hand in hers and squeezing it tightly.
“You forget that we are all brought into this world through blood and through pain, your Majesty. We are the daughters of savage women. We are their savage daughters and we will act like it. We will bite and scream and we will take up space. We will not conform to their ideas of what women should be.” Her words are whispered into the still air of the room as if she were hiding them from any listening ears.
“Do not lower your voice for any man. Do not cower beneath them. You are a powerful being. One that can create life and you can also take it away, never forget that.” She pulls a dagger off of her belt and hands it to you, curling your fingers around the hilt before she continues speaking.
“You have the blood of goddesses and witches flowing through your veins. You hold a power that men could never understand. With every step we take, every time we refuse to cower... we honour our mothers, our grandmothers, and the ones before them. The ones who stood and fought and were torn to pieces. We will not be silenced. You will not be silenced. You are more powerful than that. You must remember your strength and your power. Do not let the men convince you that you are anything less than what you are.”
Your eyes sting and your throat gets tight, but she only hugs your shoulders and continues speaking.
“Your power is what scares them. Why else would they try to assert their dominance in such a way? But you will not fall. You will not allow them to treat you like that because you are the daughter of a savage. You are yourself a savage woman and you will act like it. Royal title be damned.”
You sniffle once, twice, three times, then nod, wiping your eyes just as Thor re-enters the room.
The Valkyrie take their leave and the King sighs, crouching down next to you and gently stroking your cheek.
“I’m so very sorry, Petal. You are no longer safe here. If someone was able to bring you this letter then I fear you are in far more danger than we had thought. The conspiracy against the Kings runs far deeper than any of us could have anticipated, and if we are to keep you safe then we must act quickly.” He pulls you to your feet and bustles around quickly, covering your shoulders in a thick cloak and packing a bag of your belongings.
“Wait, where do you mean to take me? If I am not safe anywhere?”
He tosses your bag over his shoulder and grabs your hand, entwining your fingers and giving your hand a soft squeeze.
“The only place you will truly be safe.” You’re still quite confused.
“We make for Asgard.”
#bucky x reader royal au#stucky x reader royal au#bucky x reader royal au#dark!fic#dark!au#dark!steve#dark!bucky#dark!steve x you#dark!fanfiction#dark!marvel#Bucky Barnes x reader dark!au#Bucky Barnes x reader dark fic#Steve rogers x reader Dark!fic#bucky x reader dark au#steve x reader dark fic#king!steve rogers x reader#king!bucky/reader#king!bucky#king!steve x reader#king!steve/reader#royal!au#steve rogers x reader#bucky x reader#thor x reader
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Favorite (Characters)
Ruby: *barges in* RatchetMath!
Me: What is it Ruby?
Ruby: You’re showing favoritism.
Me: Okay. And?
Ruby: You need to stop. Why not draw us for once?
Me: Hm, maybe because I like Jaune more. Hell I like Penny and Neo more than you or your team.
Ruby: Why?!
Me: Because your team is horrible.
Ruby: So is team JNPR!
Me: Yeah, but only because they have to follow you. They have some individuality but we don’t explore that as much. Plus, your team would be dead without them. But you know what Ruby, I would rather draw Yang, Blake or any other character except Weiss than you right now.
Ruby: What?! But I’m-
Me: The main character that barely does main character things. Woman, Salem was in Atlas! Why was she not your top priority? Why was James your problem?
Ruby: Um well…
Me: Ruby, she knows your mother! She might know what happened to her! I get Yang was some levels your mom but shouldn’t learning what happened to your actual mom be just as important? Especially after that dark memory.
Ruby: That is true.
Me: You have silver eyes but you still don’t know how to use them. There was army of grimm around Mantle and that would have been good practice. And a better solution than Ren.
Ruby: But then I be overpowered.
Me: No. Ruby your silver eyes only work on one person. If someone sneaks up on you or doesn’t care about that light you give off then, you’re dead. Maria is proof on that.
Ruby: Um..
Me: Plus, the question that everyone in the audience could have an answer to is whether your silver eyes can even work on Salem. In all honesty, it proves the writer don’t keep track of the characters and their personalities to where they fit together in story. You know what I have been making skits, trying to be funny but… the jokes died. Look guys I-I’m sorry but… let me explain.
1. Ruby and Blake should have stayed in Mantle. Why?
1. Salem is the main villian. She knows Ruby’s mother. You know the same mother who left for a mission and didn’t come back. The same mother, who Ruby knows nothing about while everyone seems to have different perspectives of her. Or has a better clue on who she is, than Ruby herself. Plus wasn’t Salem after her too? She basically would be killing two birds with one stone by kidnapping Oscar and giving Ruby a reason to see her. That way Ruby isn’t assuming what happened to her mother. Let Salem antagonize Ruby. (Question: Can silver eyes work on Salem?)
2. Perfect training for silver eyes. Let’s face it, Ren proved to us he can mask a bunch of people without Jaune’s help. All he needed was concentration. However, Ruby is more effective because silver eyes seem to be able to destroy multiple grimm on sight. And with lives on the line that gives Ruby plenty of reason to start using them.
3. Ren calling Ruby out on her issues. Look I loved how Ren was willing to tell the truth, but him revealing Jaune cheated Beacon was… weak. Reason being it relates to Jaune’s character and Ren still follows Jaune’s orders. However, Ruby, who is supposed to be a prodigy because she came to Beacon two years ahead of her class, has not proven once that she is worthy of such praise. The only reason-The ONLY reason Ruby was enrolled into Beacon was her silver eyes. Ruby even in volume one has been nothing but liability. Initiations, she almost dies from a Stinger. Stake out, she almost got run over by a truck and it ended in failure. First mission, she gets kidnapped and almost destroyed a city block. Roman, a man with no semblance or aura continues to beat her four times in a row. And it gets worse. Ruby almost got her uncle killed. She was the first to get knocked out by Emerald. Almost dies by a robot and Godzilla. And the moment she arrived in Atlas her first move was to lie to James. She didn’t even try to stop Tyrian when she saw him. She had her gun with her too. Ren is not her sister, he might as well tell her the facts so she can do better.
4. Blake is Faunus. Mantle hates faunuses. Why not have Blake help them to prove faunuses are people too? Let Blake represent her people. I mean Velvet and Sun represent faunses more than she does her whole existence. Blake also can relate to Ren’s problem. How? Blake was a part of the White Fang, so there were expectations she had to fulfill. Especially when trying to measure up to Adam. However, she explains the longer she was in the White Fang, the more she found out how messed up and extremely bias it was. Including with Adam to the point she decided to leave. She even states she was lucky that Yang even forgave her after all the trouble she caused her. Blake challenged her bias nature, and it made her stronger for it. Blake would be basically telling Ren the more he tries to live up to someone else’s expectations, without seeing their flaws, the more he loses touch with himself and everyone around him.
5. Oscar shouldn’t have been able break out of Salem on his own: I’m sorry but… Oscar got beat up. Took a magic beam to the chest. Had to switch between him and Ozpin and mind you he had no aura to help him. He should be tired and unable to move. (In my opinion, this kid was given too much screen time. At first I was worried about him but now I’m wondering why was I worrying at all.)
2. Jaune and Yang should have gone to Atlas.
1. Penny is basically Pyrrha in the opposite light. Penny’s special because she’s a robot with a soul, a mind of her own and an attitude to prove it. She is just as human as everyone else, but no one seems to treat her as such. James only sees her as something of a weapon. Pietro treats her like child even though she’s more mature than the rest of the female cast, except Maria. And now with maiden powers, everyone is out casting Penny even more. Jaune is perfect for her because he has experience with this kind of issue. However, he would’ve had to take different route to the situation considering his failure with Pyrrha last time they had discussion on maiden powers or responsibilities (Destiny.).
2. Jaune already has been a part of maiden business since volume three. His reason to be with Penny would be make sure she doesn’t meet the same fate as Pyrrha or Amber. Not just for himself but for others around him. Especially since Cinder was in Atlas and is willing to hunt her down for the maiden powers. And James was willing to turn Penny into a soulless machine to follow his every command. (Actually, Watts is more a fault considering he hates Pietro.). James and Cinder are also opposite to Jaune in some ways. James earned his position and earned respect from his military. Jaune on the other hand cheated, and unlike James might not have everybody’s respect. Cinder treats her allies like tools. And with power she just consumes and gives nothing return. Jaune however treats his allies like family. And instead of just taking power he gives power to others around him. He’s the reason Cinder has maiden powers. So, him making it his personal mission to make sure Cinder doesn’t get more power only increases his resolve to protect Penny. (Especially since he already had to kill her in the canon finale.) In other words, James and Cinder purposed a challenge to Jaune. Can he pervert history from repeating itself? Can he really protect the maiden powers? Is he truly worthy of being a huntsman? What is he willing to risk in achieving his goal? (Also let’s be clear. Hazel beat Oscar down for the password to the relic. James shot the kid and was willing to let him fall to his death. Qrow intentionally punched the kid. I don’t care if it was for Ozpin, he still punched Oscar. Lion before even knowing Oscar was Ozpin reincarnation was already about kill him anyways. All Jaune did was push him to a wall. Yes, Jaune still would have hurt Oscar, but he didn’t. He walked away.)
3. A lot of the situations could’ve been avoided or mattered if Jaune was there. Don’t believe me? Well let me explain. Was Ruby the only option when sneaking pass Central Command? No, because they had Weiss, Nora and Penny. Weiss could have done a freezer burn like in her fight with Marrow. Or Nora could have thrown her grenades and Penny just shoots them before the hit the ground or damage anything. Both causing a smoke screen, so no one sees them. Plus, they were already caught by using Pietro credentials. Did Nora need to get knocked out for the team to escape? No. If she had Jaune with her they could’ve one caused an EMP wave being Jaune has gravity and Nora has lightning. Or two, if Nora still went through with it, Jaune would have healed her immediately. Penny lifting and keeping the arena in place. If Jaune and Weiss were with her then once Amity was in position, Weiss with Jaune’s assistances can keep it place so Penny can come back inside and the whole video could be played. Also, Pietro would know what was going on with his daughter and can properly explain how to fix her. (Better than Jaune healing her.)
4. Nora’s whole character is knowing who she is without Ren right? Then why not just have her lead the evacuation once she’s done with Atlas? Why not have her and Yang work together along with the happy huntress to evacuate Mantle? Especially if their friends disappeared to save Oscar. (And before ya’ll tell me they can’t do it….. Yang, blocked a punch from a mech, held off a Manticore, and has a semblance that literally lets her take damage and dish it back five times harder. Nora who literally crushed Weiss and Yang in a food fight. Knocked a giant horse down on its knee. And knocked Hazel away. Are you seriously saying these girls are not enough to take on a few little tigers? Come on!) If the whole point of Nora’s character development was finding out more about herself then let Nora try something without Ren. Let her call the shots. Let her take charge. Give her a character. (Hell don’t stop there. Have her interact with other characters. Like Jaune. Yang. Weiss. Or anyone other character than Ren. Let them tell her what they think about her. Let Nora be a solution to a character’s struggle. Ya’ll make it sound like Nora has no friends.)
5. All Yang needed was a break from Ruby and Blake. In all honesty Yang should have been the one to see the hounds face and kill it. Why? Well Ruby is Yang’s sister and only reminder of her nonblood related mother. And Blake is her girlfriend. And if we saw the hound’s face, we know it’s not just a silver eyed person. It’s also a faunus. This will give her a reason to protect both her loved ones because by seeing the hound she knows Salem intention with Ruby and want to keep her, and Blake from meeting the same fate of being turned into monsters. Yang should’ve been the 2nd to 4th member of team RWBY to fall. Why? One, a Yang vs Neo fight. Two, Cinder and Neo both wanted Ruby dead. So why not get rid of Ruby first? The fights would have been more thrilling and seeing the character, the show is named after, presumed to be dead would have added stakes and tension to the fight. (Also let me say this. Why is it, that the only great display of the maiden powers I’ve ever seen, was from Amber and not the maidens, as of now, Winter, Raven, and Cinder? The maiden powers are basically magic right? Why isn’t Cinder using any other element than fire?)
6. Weiss was completely useless. Look, as the saying goes, “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.” And when it came to Weiss and family, she has little to no clue of what it is nor deserves it. Weiss should have been more of an inspiration for Whitley to do right. How? By simply talking to him. What reason would she have other than Mantle? Simple, he’s her brother and she started off like him. Beacon, she was a brat. She was arrogant. And more importantly a jerk. Blake ran because of her racist attitude. Ruby literally had to impress her to prove she can be leader. Even though Weiss is not leadership martial herself. Plus, hearing May and how she and her family never resolved their issues should inspire Weiss to not repeat that mistake. And guess what, her mom, Willow, the drinker of the family, wasn’t wrong. Both her and Winter left Whitley alone. Klein wasn’t there for him either. All Whitley had was his father. So Weiss, actually acting like his sister and trying to help him allows him to feel less alone. Instead Weiss was complete Jacque through out the entire volume.
And that’s all. Look I know I should have seen this coming but I had to say it. Volume 8 could’ve been good. The problem was.
1. Characters are not placed well within the story.
2. We lost track of who said characters are.
3. The ships are in the way.
4. Being dumb for the plot. (Sometimes it’s necessary.)
#rwby#jnro#rwby vol8#ruby rose#weiss schnee#Blake Belladonna#yang xiao long#Jaune Arc#nora valkyrie#lie ren#Oscar Pine#adam taurus#cinder fall#hazel rainart#qrow branwen#winter schnee#rwby willow#penny polendina#maria calavera#pietro polendina#james ironwood#rwby lionheart#raven branwen#pyrrha nikos#rwby bumbleby#rwby whiteknight#rwby watts#sun wukong#rwby velvet
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