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#its not romantic you can be a platonic silly rabbit
ashleyrowan · 3 months
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Do you see my vision? Do you guys understand?
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mothbagel · 9 months
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For "send me series" meme
Portal
2001 ASO
ayy thank you! time for some epic color-coding skillz
[Portal]
Favorite character
It's a veryyyy close tie (between all of the portal characters) but I love the turrets. They're just lil guys
Second favorite character
AUG look I love them all but I'm gonna have to say GLaDOS because she was the main reason I wanted to get into portal (robots are cool I like robots) but also shes so cool and JUST AAAAAAAAAAAAA
Least favorite character
FUCK NONE OF THEM BUT IF I HAD TO CHOSE UH ADVENTURE CORE I GUESS
The character I’m most like
SPACE CORE SPACE CORE SPACE CORE
Favorite pairing
I haven't really gone down the rabbit hole of portal ships and I dont really ship characters outside of a few exceptions, but Ive always loved the relationship between -robot and their sad babygirl- so chelldos (is that what its called?) but not necessarily romantic (nothing against the romantic shippers, yall are great and romantic chelldos is also fun)
Least favorite pairing
No shade nothing against it, but I don't really ship wheatly/chell as a romantic ship BUT NOTHING AGAINST THOSE WHO DO
Favorite moment
Either cave johnsons combustible lemons, wheatly telling chell to kys or the entirety of test chamber 16 (I think) in portal, idk the turrets are just silly guys
Rating out of 10
ALRIGHTY SO I am really bad at platformers/platform adjacent games and they stress me out typically, so the actual gameplay is gonna be a 7/10 but the story/characters/voice acting all 10/10
-2001: A Space Odyssey-
Favorite character
HAL HAL IS AMAZING
Second favorite character
the concept of halman is so cool and I love it and also everyones designs for halman are just so amazing so im gonna say halman
Least favorite character
I REALLY DONT HAVE ONE UH IDK LETS SAY THE COMET WATER FLOYD DRANK LET MY MAN HAVE SOME REAL HYDRATION
The character I’m most like
HAL, I could go on and on about how amazingly autistic coded he is without the -I am a robot therefore I do not feel- but this post is already long enough
Favorite pairing
queer platonic halman and queer platonic crew (Bowman/Poole/HAL)
Least favorite pairing
Theres really not many ships in general and everything I can think of is a character outside of ASO being shipped with HAL so none
Favorite moment
GONNA BE DOIN A BOOK MOMENT AND A MOVIE MOMENT
the way the stargate scene is written is just so cool and it makes me so happy the way Clarke combines unrealism with space horror.
alrighty so one of my main interests is old vocal synths, so having HAL sing daisy bell (what is considered the first harmonized song said by a computer, the IBM 704/7094 part of the MUSIC-N series) was just so cool and we love it when the dying robot serenades his babygirl before death
Rating out of 10
10/10 by far one of my favorite things ever used to be the only thing I would ever make art of (but now its ASO and portal)
thank you for asking dude, this was really fun :D
If you've made it this far, remember, you will be baked, and there will be cake (/ref)
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superman--yoosung · 10 months
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hi your matchups say they're still open, i hope this it okkk!! i'm 🐇
• i have no preference towards gender but i don't like super masculine characters
• i don't really use pronouns but she/her, ver/vers, it/its are ok. fem presenting but with androgynous swag. beautiful in a girlprince way
• adult character from genshin! only recently turned 18 though haha. no tighnari or childe pls!
• i loove fashion (designing it, studying it, wearing it), idols, rabbits and deer, sewing outfits + plush dolls and creaching around at night. i haate loud, messy people and lots of textures (i'm autistic). i hate the sunlight! terrified of dogs IRL but i'd be a collie or black german shepherd.
• i'm mostly quiet (INTP), i have no control over my tone/filter so i get people saying they thought i hate them/i look angry a lot. air-headed, very low attention-span and "bimbo" tier. clumsy most of time/i dont look at what im doing. i love acting valley girl or like a malnourished bimbo (idk). i'm like a dog with the personality of a cat. beliefs.. don't be a freak idk .. don't kill ppl and i will be judgmental if i don't like your vibes.
• i think i'd have electro vision just because i get it a lot on quizzes. i also connect to it the most aesthetically. id love a sword and id have a vv elegant/pretty fighting style ..
• personal flaw erm there's zero connection between my brain and mouth so i can't really communicate much of my real feelings (esp affection). i also struggle to connect with ppl!! i'm mostly disconnected 90% of the time so it's very hard to truly love (romantically or platonically) someone for me!
• i'm 162cm... vampire to the extreme i'm 100% a vampire if im in genshin.. very strict on skincare and how i look (sensitivity issues). OR half-deer.. or half-rabbit.. My personal aesthetic is ouji/lolita, victorian/gothic themes of Black Butler and The girl from the other side.. Dark fantasy/dark academia.. LOL
i'm TERRIBLE at giving affection and words of affirmation. i love words of affirmation though and i realllly jus want someone equally as love with me/if not more
Hello 🐇, nice to meet you!! Your matchup was challenging because I kept doubting my choices, thinking, "Wouldn't this or that character's design be a texture/sensory nightmare, though??" which is a really silly thing for me to get caught up in, of all the many factors involved. (But in my defense, all the characters have SO MUCH going on in their outfits haha!!)
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Your matchup is.............................
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KAZUHA !!
Meeting under the cloak of darkness once or twice could merely be considered coincidence... By the fifth time, however, Kazuha was certain: it was fate that continued to bring the two of you together.
To those unfamiliar with the elusive duo, a relationship such as yours might seem threadbare - after all, since you only made your appearance when the moon was at its highest, and Kazuha drifted from place to place like a leaf in the wind, it seemed unlikely that you would ever cross paths in important ways. But you both knew differently. Naturally, even the smallest of actions, a singular drop in a pool of water, becomes a ripple whose rings inevitably grow in meaningful ways.
This is how Kazuha views your relationship: subtle, and all the more beautiful for it.
Fun details:
It will not take too many meetings for Kazuha to find you endearing. He's observant, so the nuances of your interactions will linger in his mind long after you've left. He'll enjoy learning about you and your mannerisms! He will always be respectful of your boundaries, too - and with his sharp mind, he can often tell if you're bothered without you having to verbalize it. (He'll ask, anyways, though, just to be sure.)
Kazuha admires your abilities and passion in subjects you enjoy. Many of the evenings you spend beneath the moonlight or on cloudy days are filled with discussions that jump from topic to topic, sharing your interests with one another. Kazuha is an eager listener, so feel free to share your passions to your heart's content! He will remember most every word. But when you're feeling quiet or have nothing to share, he can fill the silence with his charming words - though quiet companionship is also enough, too.
Of course, he knows how clumsy you can be, but as long as he's around, the wind will keep you steady on your feet. If you're comfortable with physical touch, he'll reach out to balance you, or let you hold onto him. If not, he'll do his best to verbally warn you of any uneven terrain or obstacles in your path you haven't noticed.
You two are THE definition of elegance in battle. Kazuha can swirl your electro abilities, making potent reactions. And as sword users, you can both keep your skills sharp by practicing together!
If you ever give Kazuha one of your creations, it will almost instantly become one of his most treasured posessions. He will do his best to keep it safe from harm on his journeys - though the wear and tear clothing might get from constant use is, in a way, a sign of how much he loves it. (Please forgive him if the clothes or plushies do see some light damage, though; the mercenary life is not always kind.)
Once you've become closer, Kazuha will bring you gifts from his travels. They're mostly small things that remind him of you: a carving of a rabbit, some medicine for your most recent clumsy tumble's resulting scratches, a paper umbrella from Liyue to help block out the sun. Whatever he sees that he thinks would interest you or that you might find use for in your day-to-day life, he'll get. If you dislike any of them, he takes no offense to that, either - he'll quietly store the details of what you disliked about it in his mind for reference the next time he gets you something.
You want words of affirmation? Oh, boy, does he provide! It's actually rarer for him to not slip a compliment or reassurance into your conversations. He'll take any chance he can to remind you of how much he treasures your company, and should you decide to pursue a romantic relationship with him, how much he delights in giving you affection (and being the recipient of yours, in whatever ways you deign to give it.)
He will write the most stunning of poems with you in mind, string dozens of haikus together with your name as inspiration. And, in the quiet company of only you and the moon, he'll whisper words of devotion, of loyalty and hope.
Kazuha, if asked to point to the one thing he loves most about you, will laugh at the inquiry, shaking his head. How can one point to a cloud in the sky and call it superior to the others around it? Kazuha thinks all of the things that make you unique are inseparably what he loves you for. To ask him to pick one is to ask the impossible of him. Still, if it was you who pressed him for an answer, he might relent, and tell you this: your very presence, right here beside him under the nighttime tapestry of midnight blue and flickering stars, gives him a sense of belonging, makes him think that - yes - there are things far greater than a life of wandering... and they can all be found within the depths of your eyes.
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~~I feel like many writers default to Albedo when someone mentions difficulty expressing emotions, and while I do love him for you too (for other reasons), I thought Kazuha would be better with words of affirmation and understanding what you may leave unspoken. I almost went with Rosaria or Yelan, also, as you both could be creatures of the night together (lol), but I hope this matchup is satisfactory!
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fifiophobia · 2 years
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Please do Soriel for the analysis:3
Alright gamers
My time has come.
Its time to find out why goat mom X funny sad skeleton dude a popular ship (romantic or platonic). Why is their relationship so endearing to many people? And; more importantly, what can their relationship tell us about ourselves?
Chapter 1: Aesthetics (for the shippers who ship them because they look cute together)
Let's start with aesthetics, because why not?
In general, height differences is a pretty popular trope within shipping.
Some popular ships with height differences include:
- Joyce and Hopper from Stranger Things
- Kokichi Ouma and Shuichi Saihara from Danganronpa
- Yaku Morisuke and Haiba Lev from Haikyu!!
Sans and Toriel are no exception, since they are shown to be completely different heights.
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On another note, the two work well together compositionally because you have a tall, aloof (I know it's not presented above, but anyone who's seen her fight knows what I mean), feminine figure put against a small, lighthearted, chill guy. At the same time, the two share a similar softness in their appearance that ties them together despite their differences.
In a way, its kind of funny how one of them is this god of dank memes and the other is a soft, mother-like figure.
Chapter 2: The Dynamic
Typically, with the right amount of differences and similarities in two or more character's personality are; their pairing will become popular because their personalities balance each other out. As an example:
Toriel and Sans are both hardworkers for their family BUT this is shown in different ways. Such as Toriel working harder in an obvious manner (like baking pies, making a learning schedule for Frisk, etc) while Sans works in more subtle ways (like working multiple jobs to support his brother, and silently looking after Frisk).
(If you want a better explanation on Sans hidden worker side and why he appears lazy; check out ♡Miss_Ruby♡ post: Why Soriel Works, right here.
(In fact, the following post goes into more details about their relationship rather than why people ship them. I fully recommend checking it out as their post helped give me some insight into soriel)
Another example of their dynamic is:
Toriel and Sans act like dorks around each other. Undyne revealed in the winter clock anniversary that they played hockey together like two idiots via hitting their sticks together playfully. Also, Toriel and Sans have some silly banter about Papyrus's favorite food (like how Toriel refers to Sans as a goblin in an endearing way) in the Undertale Post Pacifist Ending Q/A.
(Side note: other characters appear to view the two as having a close bond. When Asgore sees Sans getting chummy with Toriel, he starts crying. Undyne soon comforts him by using the good old phrase: "There are plenty of fish in the sea.")
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Moving on from that, lets talk about green flags. A green flag in relationships is when you improve yourself for the other person (as in changing your unhealthy habits for each other. Not changing who you are as a person to appease a hypocrite) The wholesome change made from their relationship is present in Toriel and Sans.
Some examples includes:
- Sans being inspired by Toriel to bake even when he might not have the motivation or energy
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- Toriel cheering up from her personal demons after adopting San's sense of humor
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In a way, their relationship actually reminds me of Jessica and Rodger rabbit
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As in: a tall, calm lady with a hidden sense of humor who becomes close with a short, goofy man because of their personalities and humor.
(Side note: Rodger and Toriel both deal with chaotic children, while Sans and Jessica both bond over their respective buddy because they think they are funny. Evidence for this includes the comment San's made about Toriel's Old Lady yodel joke shown below).
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Chapter 3: The Shippers Themselves
A while back, I read an interesting post on tumblr that stated that
"The real ship dynamic is yourself X your type"
Sadly, I forgot who made the post (if you can find the original creator please tell me so I can credit them)
OP has a point with shipping. I've noticed that active shippers tend to have a "type" that strangely correlate to something in their lives
(Though, please be aware. Not everyone who has the same ship is going to act or think the same. Everyone has their own reason for liking a certain ship. I just wanted to point this out)
So, what does this have to do with Soriel?
Well, the following post reminded me of another post where a soriel shipper explained that a major reason they loved the ship was because they could relate to both characters. They explained that, in a way, the ship gave them hope for themselves. If two lonely and grief stricken characters could find happiness (and potentially love) in each other, then maybe they could find love.
(Like the previous post: I couldn't find the post that talks about this. If you know who made that post please tell me).
Based off of how well received the original post was; it seemed like a lot of people resonated with OP's statement.
TL;DR: Soriel became a popular ship because a lot of people resonated with the wholesome aspects in their relationship.
And you know what? I'm not complaining! It's an adorable ship that makes me laugh.
(PS: I'm sorry if this post seems jumbled. I just had so much on my mind for this post that I had difficulty putting my thoughts together)(Also, if you don't ship them or you think that it would be impossible for them to get together; that's perfectly ok! I just made this for fun and because I like analyzing stuff).
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dinosaurs-last-day · 3 years
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Of Witches and Long Lost Families
This is my gift for @because-were-fam-ily for the @sanderssidesgiftxchange 2020!
Their prompt that I used was magic au, and I also added an nonbinary character since another one of their prompts was nonbinary coming out. 
Relationships: platonic dukeceit, eventual romantic intrulogical, familial dukexiety and familial ancxeit. 
word count: 5004
warnings: ask to tag
Witches, demons, angels, elves, fairies. All considered mythical creatures to humans, all very real. Most of them live in hiding, unwilling to prove their existence to the non-magical humans, sometimes even fearful of what people would do if they found out the truth. 
Janus was one of these magical beings, they were a witch. Like many magical and mythical beings, they preferred to avoid humans, opting to live in the woods that were deemed “haunted.” Because so many magical beings lived in those woods, humans tended to stay away, which led to it being a magical paradise. 
Janus lived by themself, spending most of their time perfecting potions and magical spells. When they weren’t working, they were often with their best friend, Remus. 
Remus was a demon, a cruel and vulgar species. Remus didn’t live in the forest, he chose to live in the pits of hell, which suited him just fine. Everything about Remus was crazy, from his wild sense of clothing (billowing black shirts with tight leather pants) to his wild purple makeup and dark green demon horns. Remus’ favorite pastime was coming up from Hell to terrorize humans in the village closest to the forest. 
Janus was almost the exact opposite. They were calm and careful, full of grace and poise. Janus dressed with elegance, wearing long cloaks and flowing skirts that were practical but still had that dramatic flair that Janus was known for. They wore satin yellow gloves, which served no practical purpose, the gloves were purely because Janus liked them. 
Together, the two friends were a force to behold. Remus’ chaotic whimsy and Janus’ calculated cunning worked together better than most people would expect. Most of the time, their schemes were directed at humans who had wandered into the forest or offended the magic folk. Janus insisted on using their powers for protective purposes only, but Remus was known to convince them on pulling a cruel prank every once and awhile. If the two weren’t terrorizing humans, they were probably terrorizing Remus’ rival and brother, the angel Roman. 
On the particular morning our story starts, Remus had crawled up from Hell, bored and hoping that Janus could entertain him somehow. He wanted to go and trick his brother or his brother’s friend, but Janus insisted that he was too busy working to go do any of Remus’ crazy ideas. So Remus just sat around Janus’ cabin, moping, complaining and summoning hellhounds to keep him entertained. 
“Janny! Why must you insist on being so serious! We’re occult beings damn it! If we want to have a little fun, we should be allowed to have fun!” Remus draped himself across Janus’ couch dramatically, trying to tear Janus away from their work. Janus rolled their eyes and continued to stir the bubbling brew in their cauldron. 
“I’m sorry Remus, but I am working. I have to get this potion ready for Logan.” 
Remus perked up. “Logan the elf?” Janus nodded. It was common knowledge that Remus was romantically interested in the elven man for a long time. Logan himself was the only one who seemed unaware, but he wasn’t known for being the best at reading social cues. He was the most socially awkward elf that Janus had ever seen, which was saying something since elves were known for being an incredibly social race. 
“Are you delivering the potion today?” Remus asked. Janus nodded once again. 
“You can tag along if you promise to behave,” Janus told their friend. Remus agreed wholeheartedly that as long as they were going to visit Logan, he would stay out of trouble, specifically, he would refrain from terrorizing Roman. 
“Well then let’s go!” Remus was ready to bounce out the door but Janus held him back, reminding him that they had to wait for the potion to be done first. Remus sighed and flopped down on Janus’ couch, waiting impatiently as he summoned another hellhound and began to play with the giant demon dog. 
“It’s done,” Janus called, watching as Remus zoomed towards the door and out into the open air. Janus laughed and followed their friend outside, smiling as the sun peeked through the trees. 
“Let us be off!” Remus cried dramatically, leading the way. The two headed through the woods towards the more populated area, where Logan lived. They were still a ways away from the town when they heard a rustling in the bushes.
Janus stopped to listen, expecting some sort of rabbit or little fairy to pop out of the brush, but nothing appeared. Remus was starting to get bored, so he began to pull Janus down along the path. 
The moment Janus’ back was turned towards the bush, more rustling came and out appeared a young teenager. He was tall and skinny, his vivid violet eyes hidden by the hood he wore over his head. The boy froze when he saw Janus and Remus. 
Remus was the first to move, diving for the boy. The boy screamed and held out his hands to keep Remus from flying straight into him. 
“Remus no!” Janus yelled. Remus stopped mid flight, suspended in the air as he stared at Janus. The boy went to run away but Janus muttered a spell to immobilize the boy. The boy struggled against the magic for a moment before seeming to give up. Janus walked forward, motioning for Remus to come and stand on the ground. 
“What are you doing in the forest, dear boy?” Janus asked, standing in front of the boy. The teenager’s skin was a tan color, partly from being out in the sun and partly because of its natural shade. 
“I was running away,” the boy said through gritted teeth. He was glaring at the two mythical beings in front of him, shifting his eyes between the two, unsure of who was the bigger threat. 
“Janny, I wanna feed him to my hellhound!” Remus whined, tugging at the witch’s arm. 
Janus shook their head. “No, we’re not killing him.” Both Remus and the boy seemed shocked. 
“Why aren’t you going to kill me?” The boy asked. “Not that I don’t appreciate it or anything, but he’s a demon,” his glance flicked over to Remus for a moment before returning to Janus. “And I’m assuming you’re a witch. And I’m in your forest.” 
“Correct, Remus here is a demon, an annoying one too. And yes, I am a witch. My name is Janus. 
“Now, as for why we aren’t going to kill you, even though you are in our forest. I guess you spark my curiosity. You said that you were running away, why?” 
The boy looked at the ground for a moment, seeming to consider if he should tell his captors.
“Be honest now, or I’ll let Remus do as he pleases with you. I won’t stop him if he tries to feed you to his army of hellhounds.” Remus clapped his hand in excitement. The boy gulped and looked up.
“I hated it there, the village I mean. I don’t have a family and basically the only reason they kept me around was for working. I don’t know where I’m going, just not there.” 
Janus thought for a moment. 
“What’s your name kid?” The boy seemed surprised that Janus had even cared to ask, but Janus just stared at him. 
“Um, it’s Virgil.” 
“Well Virgil, if you don’t know where you’re going, how do you feel about becoming a witch? Having an apprentice would be nice, an extra set of hands and commany for when Remus is too busy terrorizing someone.” 
Remus gasped from behind Janus, but they focused on Virgil, waiting for a response. Virgil gulped and nodded.
"I'll become your apprentice. Anything to not be fed to a demon's pet dog." Remus growled, but Janus ignored him. With a few words in an ancient language, Virgil was released from the spell and collapsed to the ground.
"Remus, I'd like you to make the delivery for me. I'll be walking Virgil back to my cabin. We can't have anyone else see a human in our forest." Janus commanded, handing Remus the potion. “And please don’t make Logan uncomfortable, he is a valued customer.” 
“Fine, but only because you asked so politely,” Remus said, running down the path, glass vial in hand. Janus sighed, they knew that it was highly unlikely that Remus would actually respect Logan’s boundaries, that’s just how Remus was. 
They turned back to the teen who was still sitting on the ground. Virgil was staring up at Janus, his face expressionless. 
“Why did you save me?” He asked.
“I have no idea what you are talking about. Now follow me.” Janus headed back towards their cabin, allowing Virgil to follow just a few steps behind him.
“You offered me the option to live. I’m human, why would you do that?” 
“I don’t know.” 
“You don’t know?”
“No, I don’t know. Something about you draws me in, interests me. But I’ve yet to put my finger on what that something is. I intend to find out though.” 
“So I’m some sort of experiment?” 
“If you insist on looking at it that way, then sure. But I think of it as an assistant with an interesting past that I intend to find out. Why do you keep asking, would you prefer death? It can be arranged.” 
Virgil stopped in his tracks. “No, I prefer this.” Janus turned around, facing the boy. 
“Then follow me and stop asking so many silly questions. Questions are for learning.” They turned back around and listened to the sound of Virgil’s feet hitting the dirt path as the boy followed along.
They approached Janus’ cabin, Virgil silently taking in the entire forest. When the two walked through the front door, Janus allowed Virgil to walk around and look at everything. They noticed how Virgil seemed to hang around the storage closet where Janus kept most of their potion ingredients. Virgil was inspecting the different labels, sometimes silently mouthing the names of the different herbs. 
Remus came storming into the building right as Virgil was settling down on the couch next to Janus. 
“I’m back!” He yelled in a sing-song voice. “Did ya miss me? How’s our new friend doing?” 
Janus looked to Virgil, who seemed surprised that he was expected to answer.
“Um, I’m doing fine I guess. As fine as a dude can be in this situation.” 
“You going to lay down some ground rules for him, Janny? So if he breaks them, I can feed him to my hellhounds?” Virgil visibly paled at the mention of the demon’s dogs, but neither of the adults paid him any attention.
“Yes, ground rules. First of all, don’t touch anything without permission. We don’t want you to accidentally cause an explosion. Second of all, you can’t leave my property without one of us, that’s for your safety. My garden is open to you whenever you want but outside my fence, if we aren’t there, we can’t protect you from any magical being you stumble across. And lastly, if I happen to have a customer over, it’s probably best that you stay upstairs. Again, this is for your own safety.” Virgil seemed to relax when he realized that the rules weren’t as bad as he originally thought. Remus pouted a little, realizing that he couldn’t actually feed the teenager to the hellhounds with these rules, but he knew better than to argue with Janus. 
“So I’m not a prisoner?” Virgil asked. 
Janus shook their head. “We’ve already discussed this, you are an assistant. And I’d like to make it clear that if you decide that magic isn’t your thing, you’re free to leave, go wherever you want. But I will not protect you.” 
“If you want to leave Jan’s boring potion making lessons, feel free to join me,” Remus said, sliding next to Virgil. Virgil laughed awkwardly.
“Join you?” 
“Gimme your soul and you’ll have everything that I have! Become a demon! It’s lots of fun, I promise.” 
“No trying to convert my assistant Remus. I doubt the boy is ready to give up his soul just yet.” 
“Yeah, I think I’ll keep my soul for now. I kind of like it.” 
Janus showed Virgil to the room that he would be staying in and told him that they would begin his lessons in witchcraft first thing in the morning. Right now, Virgil needed sleep. Janus insisted that it had been a very busy afternoon and that practicing magic while not being fully rested was a dangerous game. 
~
The next few weeks went by in a blur to Janus. What stood out to them about living with Virgil was how easily the teen picked up magic. It was like a second nature to him, Janus couldn’t help but wonder if Virgil actually had some mythical ancestry in his past that maybe, he didn’t know about. 
Virgil seemed to enjoy learning magic too, he was constantly asking questions about whatever Janus was working on and reading some of Janus’ old spell books in his free time. Remus wouldn’t stop bothering him about selling his soul, but now it was more of a joke, the subject didn’t bother Virgil as much.
And Virgil was really good at following Janus’ rules. He never went past the gates, which he claimed the very idea of heading out alone made him extremely anxious, and he always stayed in his room when there was a visitor, who was usually Logan. Virgil did spend a lot of time in the garden, choosing to read in the sun and warmth of the forest. 
One day, while Virgil was off somewhere reading and Janus was busy finishing a potion for Patton the fae, Remus slammed open the door.
“I’m home!” Janus rolled their eyes, used to the demon’s antics. “I brought company!” Remus dragged another person into the cabin. Janus immediately stood up.
“Logan! Hello. Did you come with another potion order?” 
Logan, the elf that Remus had been crushing on, was a very serious and simple person. He tended to stick to simple, practical clothes. A fitted navy blue tunic with pants and a half cape that didn’t get in his way. He wore glasses that matched his simple style. Even his accent, a traditional elven dialect, was crisp and simple. 
“I’m afraid not Janus. You see, I came here upon Remus’ request.” Janus turned and raised an eyebrow at Remus, who was bouncing up and down on his toes. 
“I convinced him to date me!” Remus said, holding onto Logan’s hands. 
Janus turned to Logan. “Blink twice if he threatened you into this.” Logan shook his head.
“There was no such threatening. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but we’ve been spending more time around each other and I do not find Remus unbearable as others do. Quite the opposite actually, I find him quite enjoyable. He has a lot of interesting things to say and knows many things about topics I’ve never looked into.”
“You hear that, Janny? I have a boyfriend! I can’t wait for us to do things together! We can go on adventures together, create cool things, teach Virgil how to-” Remus cut himself off, realizing his mistake too late.
“Virgil?” Logan asked. “Who is Virgil?” 
“Virgil is no one, Remus is just being silly,” Janus lied, hoping that Logan would believe them. 
“I heard my name, is everything okay?” Virgil said, walking in from the garden, carrying an old spell book. He froze in his tracks when he saw Logan. Janus could see the anxiety rise up inside Virgil, knew that Virgil would probably have a panic attack any second now if this situation wasn’t taken care of immediately. But they didn’t know what to do. 
“Are you a human?” Logan asked, stepping forward. Virgil immediately took two steps backward, remaining silent. Logan didn’t seem to realize how scared Virgil was, continuing to walk towards him, backing Virgil into a wall as he examined the boy. “Goodness, you are human. How interesting.” 
Remus was the first one to truly react. “That’s actually one of my little demons in training! Not a human at all!” Remus had always been the worst liar that Janus had ever seen. 
“No, this boy is human, and quite an interesting one at that,” Logan mused, continuing to study Virgil. He noticed the book that Virgil was clutching to his chest.
“Can you read that? Understand it?” He asked. Unsure of what to do, Virgil nodded. His breathing was becoming rapid. 
“Fascinating. Can you brew potions, perform simple spells?” Another nod. Janus moved, slipping in between Logan and Virgil, motioning for Virgil to go outside. The teen obeyed immediately, sitting in the grass, out of sight of Logan. He focused on steadying his breathing. Janus would take care of this. 
“You can’t tell anyone he’s here. You know what some of them would do if they found out,” Janus pleaded.
“Don’t be ridiculous, he has just as much a right to live in this forest, just like every other mythical creature here.” 
Janus raised an eyebrow as the three adults moved to the couch. “What do you mean?” 
“Don’t you think it’s funny that a human boy can perform magic? And did you see what he was reading, those weren’t simple spells that he was studying. I think it’s more than safe to say he has witches’ blood. How ever did you find him?” 
Janus and Remus worked together to tell the story of how they found Virgil and brought him back to the cabin. Logan listened in rapt attention and thought a few minutes after they had finished telling the story.
“Did you ever figure out what drew you to him?” Logan finally asked Janus.
“No. For all I know, it was just chance,” they said. 
“I want to do some research back at my library, but I’m almost 100% sure that boy has witch’s blood in his veins. That would explain everything. Why he was drawn to this forest, why you decided to help him, why he’s so good at magic. I’m sure if you asked him, that would even explain why he decided to leave his home.” 
"So, Virgil can stay?" Remus asked. Logan nodded and Remus immediately moved so that he was sitting next to his boyfriend, as if he had kept space between them in case Logan said that Virgil had to leave. 
Logan left, insisting that he had to start immediately on his research into Virgil’s family history, leaving Janus and Remus alone. The moment that they were sure that Logan was gone, Janus ran into the garden, followed by Remus. 
The two adults found Virgil under a tree, tearing at the grass as if that would calm him down. He looked up when he heard them running towards him. Janus could still see panic in the teenager’s eyes. 
“I’m going to have to leave, aren’t I?” The sentence was like being stabbed through the heart with a sharp sword, Janus felt so much pain over it. Remus practically threw himself on the ground, pulling Virgil into a hug and holding him close. Janus joined the hug, keeping his own sobs at bay.
“You aren’t going to leave,” Remus said. Out of all of them, Remus was definitely the calmest in the moment, which was very strange. But Janus couldn’t focus on it at the moment. “If Janus tries to kick you out, I’ll feed them to my hellhounds and you’ll come with me.” 
“Of course I’m not going to kick you out or make you leave. If you want to stay, then I’d be more than happy to let you. You’re family by now.” Janus reached over and wiped a tear off of Virgil’s cheek. Virgil sniffled, trying to pull himself together. 
“But what about that elf?” Virgil asked between sniffles. “Won’t he try to get rid of me?” 
“Logan? He would never.” Remus looked slightly offended on his boyfriend’s behalf, but only slightly. 
Janus smiled. “He thinks that you’re like me. He thinks that you’re actually a witch.” 
Virgil’s jaw dropped a few inches. “But I’m human!”
“Virgil, do you know anything about your family? You never talk about them.” Janus knew that Virgil’s answer to this question could tell them more than all of Logan’s research put together.
Virgil shook his head solemnly. “I don’t know.” 
“Then I think it’s safe to say that the odds that one of your ancestors was a witch is very possible. Virgil, you’re the best student I’ve ever seen. You pick up concepts and skills quicker than anyone I know.”
“So I’m a witch?” Virgil looked at the spell book lying on the ground next to him with a new found appreciation.
“Quite possibly.” 
“Logan is looking into it right now,” Remus said. “He has a whole library full of books and he thinks one might contain a family tree that you should be a part of, if you aren’t already.” 
“So I can stay?” 
“Yes, of course you can stay.” 
~
“I’d like to see Virgil.” 
Janus looked up from their work, and made eye contact with Logan, who was standing in the front doorway. 
“Well hello to you too Logan. It’s a pleasure to see you in my house.” 
“This is important. I want to speak to Virgil. I think I may have found his family.” 
Janus dropped what they were doing, and immediately walked over to Logan. 
“You think so? Wow, that’s amazing.” 
“So can I see him?” Logan seemed slightly impatient, not unusual to him. Logan liked to know things, and not knowing things made him uncomfortable. Janus could tell that this was one of those moments where he didn’t know something and he expected Virgil to have the answers.
“I’m afraid that Virgil isn’t home right now. Remus took him down to hell to see the new hellhound puppies. I don’t know exactly when they’ll be back, but you’re welcome to wait here until them.” 
Logan nodded and thanked Janus before sitting down on the couch. Janus watched the elf for a minute, noting how his leg bounced in anticipation. For Logan’s sake, they hoped that Remus and Virgil would be back soon. 
~
The sound of two people shouting excitedly was what alerted Logan and Janus that Remus and Virgil had returned. Logan had been waiting on Janus’ couch for nearly an hour, sitting in silence with his leg bouncing. When he heard them, Logan practically leaped off the couch. 
Remus kicked the door open, floating inside. Virgil followed, excitedly explaining something to Remus, his hands waving around his head as he talked. He immediately stopped talking when he saw Logan.
“Lolo!” Remus said, throwing himself at his boyfriend. Logan kissed Remus quickly before turning back to Virgil.
“I’m sorry to spoil your conversation Virgil but do you have a moment? I’d like to talk to you, in private.” Virgil’s glance immediately shot to Janus, looking for an answer as to what was going on. Janus mouthed the word family and Virgil seemed to understand.
“Sure, yeah, would you like to walk in the garden or talk in my room?” Virgil asked Logan. Logan fidgeted with his glasses. 
“The garden is fine. This will only take a minute.” Janus and Remus watched as Logan followed Virgil out the door into the back garden. The moment that they were out of sight, Remus turned on his heels and demanded an explanation from Janus.
“Logan showed up to speak to Virgil about an hour ago,” They explained. “Said it had to do with his family. I can only hope that it's good news.” 
“Jan,” Remus sat down on the couch, his voice soft as if he was afraid to say what he was about to say. “What if Virgil finds his family? What if they’re nearby and he wants to live with them?”
Janus hadn’t even thought about this, but it made sense that Virgil would want to live with his real family, not with Janus and Remus. They sat down next to Remus, resting their head on the demon’s shoulder.
“I guess all we can do is support him. It’s his family, we don’t get to claim that title. He’ll probably still want to spend time with us.”
“And if he doesn’t? What if he prefers his new family, his real family, to us and never wants to speak to us again?” It was rare for Remus to worry about something, which indicated to Janus how much this was bugging Remus.
“Well, then we’ll just have to accept that. There’s nothing we can do.” 
They sat in silence for a minute, letting the thought of losing Virgil settle in their minds. When Virgil and Logan walked in the house, they both jumped up to greet them. Logan stood near the door in silence while Virgil walked over to the two adults.
“So, do you know who your family is?” Remus asked, hovering a few inches over Virgil. The teenager nodded. Remus sank down to the floor, leaning on Janus for support.
“Are you going to stay with them?” Janus asked softly. 
“My family was a line of powerful witches, but Logan says that nobody knows what happened to them. They don’t live in the forest anymore.” Remus stood a little straighter, hope glimmered in his eyes. 
“So that means you’re staying?” He asked. Janus tried not to smile, but he felt just as hopeful as Remus looked.
“I wouldn’t know where to start looking for my family. Besides, you guys are my real family now and I could never leave you.” Virgil wrapped his arms around both Janus and Remus, holding them close in a tight group hug. They hugged him back, both feeling full of joy and gratefulness. Remus looked up and motioned for Logan to join the hug, who agreed slightly reluctantly. The four of them were a family. An odd family, but a family nonetheless. 
~
“Virgil, if you don’t stir that right now, it’s going to explode!” Janus shouted, watching in horror as Virgil stood over the cauldron. Sure enough, the liquid in the pot let out a great popping noise as the room was enveloped in smoke and the two stood coughing. When the smoke cleared, the cauldron was empty, with a burnt smell coming from the bottom. 
“Sorry,” Virgil said, immediately going to clean up. He was laughing slightly at his mistake. Janus couldn’t help but smile, mistakes were rare with Virgil, he was so good at witchcraft. 
“Don’t tell Remus, he’ll be praising you for trying to kill us both and I don’t think I can live with that,” they joked, helping Virgil clean up. 
“Don’t worry. You know what Logan would say if he heard that I made such a rookie mistake? I’d never hear the end of it!” 
“Roman stopped by the other day, while you were out with Logan. He said that you and Remus were causing problems again.” Janus watched as the teen’s face turned a bright pink. Pranking with Remus had become a common pastime for the young boy, but Janus never found the heart to tell him to stop. Often, they found the silly tricks funny and couldn’t help but laugh at how Remus’ brother always reacted. Roman was quite a dramatic angel. If him and Remus got along, they would be quite a force to be reckoned with. 
“It’s not my fault! Remus was upset at something Roman said and he had the perfect revenge plan! I only used one spell and it wasn’t even that powerful!” Virgil defended himself but stopped when he saw that Janus wasn’t angry. 
“Just don’t get caught next time,” they warned Virgil. “I’ll have to tell the same thing to Remus. I swear, the two of you together are like two small children. I don’t know how Logan doesn’t go insane dating that menace.” 
“Did someone say menace?” Remus asked, popping his head through the front door. 
“Yes, we were just talking about you,” Janus said. 
“I knew it! I am the most menacing menace this forest has ever seen you know!” Remus floated into the house, followed by Logan, who was rolling his eyes at his boyfriend’s absurdity. 
“Are you all prepared for the family picnic?” Logan asked. Janus nodded, grabbing the large basket of food that they had prepared from the counter. 
“I’ll carry that!” Virgil said, grabbing the heavy basket before Janus could object. He had to adjust his hold on it a few times before he was comfortable carrying it, leading the way out the back door through the gardens. 
They set up the picnic under a large tree that was older than all of them put together. Logan took a few moments to tell Virgil about the tree’s magical properties, who listened in rapt attention. Janus would have listened, but he was busy stopping Remus from eating all the mini pies.
“You know, I’m glad I didn’t feed you to my hellhounds,” Remus told Virgil. “You’re a good kid.” 
“You could never feed me to them anyways, I’m too powerful and besides, they like me more than they like you.” Remus let out a dramatic gasp, offended. Virgil smirked, continuing to mock Remus. 
“You guys ready for lunch?” Janus asked. Everybody sat down and waited. Janus smiled at their friends gathered around on the blanket. He thought of how close they had grown, how many memories they had made. 
Janus held up a drink, indicating that they wanted to make a toast. The others followed suit. 
“To family, however strange we may be.” The others repeated the words and dug in. Once, Virgil looked up and smiled at Janus. Janus was sure that they would be speaking for everyone under that tree when they said that family was the best thing to ever happen to them. The odd, mixed family, with all of it’s magic, was probably the greatest thing in the world.
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elsanna-shenanigans · 3 years
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February Contest Submission #9: The Search For The Feathered God
words: ca. 2400 setting: Fairytale World lemon: No cw: none
“This was the story of two sisters who loved each other very much and made a journey to discover themselves.”
“Once, when the world was still young but not so young that the gods frolicked without mortals, there lived two sisters. The names of these sisters were lost to time, but to modern ears, they might be referred to as “Anna” and “Elsa”.
Like all of the humans alive then, they spent their time with their peoples. They learned a craft, the culture, how the world worked, and about the old gods. For you see in those days, the old gods were so ubiquitous that their stories hardly needed to be.
The old gods were a different sort than the younger gods. They were spoken of, sacred, and altogether content with what they had created.  The younger gods had a fire to prove themselves that led them to continue to meddle in human affairs. Both sets of deities ruled together, for the sun and the moon bound them in creation.
In those days, humans were still developing their gift of curiosity, for they had yet to learn all that they were. It had led them much further than the people of wood or clay, and it would continue to. Unbeknownst to them, their sense waned when there was normalcy of living. People grew comfortable with the way things were, for that was the order seemingly ordained.
The sisters’ curiosities were a finely developed sort. The younger found herself with an ability to dream in the day, able to imagine all sorts of wonderful things. She was naturally drawn to living things and discovering what might be around every corner. The elder knew herself to be talented with lines and shapes, understanding how things might be made. 
They wondered most about the ability that the elder had, since she had the ability to summon cold and frost. They had at first surmised that she might be a partial god, but their parents were still there. Even now, their best guess was that she had been blessed.
What changed everything was when Anna decided to ask around to see if perhaps they might be able to ask the wise god. He might know why Elsa was like that. To her horror, all laughed at her silly proposition.
‘Nobody has seen the wise god!’
‘Then I’ll be the first!’
They’d shake their heads and shake their bodies with that hidden laugh of pity. Poor, foolish girl. She didn’t know what she was attempting or requesting. Nobody had found him in quite some time, so why would she?
Anna though, she wasn’t the sort to give up lightly. She would be the first, and she would find an answer to Elsa’s lifelong question. Elsa in turn was willing to support Anna’s quest at every step.
With heavy hearts, they set off from their home. The general air was one of grieving, for nobody expected to see them again. Surely they would be eaten by prowling jaguars or struck down for their insolence, or sadder yet, wander forever chasing something impossible.
Their first step was to visit the great city of Teotihuacan. Though they had never been, they had heard stories of the trade hub. So many people were there that it felt like a guarantee that they would hear about the whereabouts of the wise god. Maybe nobody at home knew, but the people there might.
They traveled a long while, for in those days, they had no quicker speed than what their legs might muster. Often, their pace was slowed by the mild ache of muscles that asked why there was a sudden increase in exercise. It may have been a blessing from the gods for this sluggish pace.
For you see, the sisters had none other than the other for company. Though they had always been close, this bond was only tightened with them being their sole respective companions. There were struggles with annoying behaviors, but they had suffered those before and thus found it easier to move past them.
There was a close call once, when they had heard a soft padding and the crack of a broken branch. That was their only warning, as Elsa’s ice spiraled around them defensively to  form a protective dome. Into the dome crashed a jaguar, with its ferocious maw spraying thick strands of saliva. 
It found itself unable to break through, though its every swipe made Elsa tremble and sweat with exertion. Eventually, it grew tired of attempting to prey on them and left, finding it to be far too much trouble. Nevertheless, they did not leave the dome for fear of being hunted once more.
Elsa was beside herself. She wanted to go home immediately and demanded for Anna to go home. Anna protested, naturally. They argued on whether to go or stay late into the night.
‘Anna, I can’t let you risk yourself for me!’
‘We can make it! I know we can, please just trust me!’
‘This isn’t worth your life, Anna.’
‘You’re worth a million jaguars, Elsa.’
‘No, I’m not.’
‘Please Elsa, for you. It’s not risk when it’s out of love!’
‘That makes it worse!’
‘But we’ve come so far. We will find the source of your powers, I swear it!’
‘But- I-’
‘Elsa. You. Are. Worth. It.’
Anna scooped Elsa into a deep embrace and held her there. Elsa in turn weakly hugged back, still trying to process what happened. 
Anna loved her that much. Anna loved her that much. Anna loved her that much.
Anna loved her.
Tears welled in Elsa’s eyes, and she could barely contain the liquid emotion spilling out. Anna’s eyes watered in empathy and they remained in the hug for a while. Sometimes, it was nice to be reminded you were loved. Then and now. Humans never did fundamentally change all that much.
The remainder of the trip to Teotihuacan was relatively peaceful, all things considered. The two kept the dome up for a few more days, but were able to travel safely after that. It ought to be noted that while the jungle was beautiful, it formed a monotonous, lonely sort of beauty. There were only so many shades of greens and browns and fantastic creatures that one could see before the eye wearied of even those.
It was because of that, that when the city appeared over the horizon, it appeared even more glorious in its humanity. The bustle, the sounds, the buildings, the people: all so very human. There were more people in this one place than they had ever seen at home. It seemed a given that somebody might know where the wise god was.
To their shock and mild horror, it seemed that people from all over knew the wise god as something different. Some said that they spoke of the rain god, or the sun god, or an evil god. All had different versions of what seemed to be the wise god. The only consistency between these versions was that the god had the form of a feathered serpent.
Some suggested that they might travel to Tenochtitlan. Perhaps the Emperor or the princess of that land might know. Nobody knew where the wise-feathered god was. Only that he was. They both often felt rising frustration at the fact that the wise god was among the old gods.
They stayed in the city as long as they could, but there were no answers to be found. If nothing else, they had only found themselves new confusion. Seeing as they had no other lead, they decided to make the journey to Tenochtitlan to meet those peoples and their emperor. Perhaps, perhaps.
Like the first journey, the second was long and tedious. The land was as of yet untamed by man, and thus plants sprung up as they pleased. Paths were cut into these, but the plants seeped their long roots into the paths in order to secretly reclaim them. 
Once more, the sisters found themselves yet closer to one another. Words were unnecessary to express the care they felt for each other. It was not quite yet something more, but it was not merely the platonic love that one might feel for a wonderful friend or sibling. Indeed, the line between platonic love and romantic love is oft blurred, but theirs had become near vanished. But that is difficult to identify when one might never conceive of such a concept. Or perhaps, shame would arise otherwise.
When they arrived, they were once more in awe. This time, however, it was at the gardens seemingly floating over the water, farmers propelling themselves in small boats. Indeed, it seemed like the very city floated over waters, and was decorated with bright accoutrements that accentuated its near concentric design. It was truly a capital to behold.
When they arrived at the palace, the two were greeted by stern-faced guards who regarded them with little care.
‘What brings you to the palace?’ asked a guard.
‘We come seeking answers,’ replied Elsa.
‘Answers?’
‘Yes, we are searching for the wise god.’
Elsa stayed cool, but looked faint. When asked later, she confirmed that she indeed was on the verge of nervous collapse due to the danger of being so far from home and potentially insulting an emperor. Anna on the other hand, looked impatient.
The guards turned to each other and shrugged.
‘Very well.’
The sisters were allowed entry into the main hall. However, greeting them was not the emperor at all, but rather his daughter, the princess Iztaccihautl. She looked wistful and distracted, as if her mind was far away. She gave them a look and asked why they might bother her solemn vigil.
They in turn, answered that they were looking for the wise god. She told them that perhaps they might be able to find him if they asked a rabbit who lived at the base of the mountain. He had spoken to a god in a cave.
‘And…’ The princess gulped. ‘My beloved has been fighting in the mountains. Please, if you see him, tell him I’m waiting for him.’
Anna patted her on the back. ‘We’ll find him. Promise.’
‘You will? Oh thank you!’
‘I bet you he’s already beat all of them.’
‘Yes, yes I do so terribly hope so.’
‘I know so. You gotta hold onto hope, okay?’
‘Okay. No matter what.’
With the information in mind, the two trekked off into the mountains. The terrain from before was difficult, but now it was rugged and vertical. The earth did not care for comfort and maneuverability, only that it merely desired to be there and so it was. Once more, they grew closer. They still hadn’t the words to express what each thought, but the princess’s word, ‘beloved’ struck both deeply. There was something about it.
In the mountains, they found a band of warriors. Brave, decorated, and handsome, they were returning with the spoils of victory. Though some were wounded and all were tired, they had not lost the smiling bravado that marked the human spirit. They passed through the group, and told them of the princess’s message.
As if by some revitalizing magic the leader, Popocatepetl perked up at the message. He nodded at his second in command with hardly any time between his movement and suddenly running ahead to reach his love. The sisters had a good feeling about the lovers’ ending.
After that detour, they continued their journey. It made them both think more, about what type of love it might take to run so fast, to worry so hard. And in both, it resonated with something deep within that they did not wholly understand. They had begun to develop a vocabulary and rudimentary instincts, but they simply had not yet realized what sort of love was between them.
Eventually, they made it to a tree that looked like it might home a rabbit. They knocked politely and asked if it might wish to speak. When it hopped out, both were shocked. Anna squeed, and asked when it got its ears lengthened. Long ears were perfect for it.
In those days, rabbits had short ears. But this rabbit, the first long eared rabbit changed everything. It had done the tasks necessary to receive a reward from the god living in the cave. Thus, the sisters offered him food in return for knowledge of where the god resided.
The rabbit happily showed them to the cave, which contained darkened coils. They had the feeling that finally, after such questing, it was over. They had found him.
The wise god opened one eye and peered at the mortal humans who were the first to find him in a very long time.
‘What brings you to my cavern? I am resting.’
‘I-I’m really sorry but I have two questions, O wise one,  if that’s okay,’ Anna said.
‘The distance you traveled and your bond… yes. Yes, I think it is alright.’
Anna gulped. ‘One. Who are you? I thought you were the wise god.’
The serpent loomed and drew to its full height outside of the cavern, a glittering mass of emerald scales and long feathers emerging from its head and tail.
‘I am Quetzalcoatl, the god of wisdom. I am attributed the weather and occasionally the sun. Ask your second question, child.’
‘Um… why does Elsa have magic? She’s just a normal human like me.’
‘She was blessed. It was a reward for the love your parents gave the world, and the one between you.’
Anna blinked. ‘Between us?’
‘Yes. You ought to have recognized it, strong as it is.’
‘I-’
They looked at each other, a longing gaze going between them.
For the first time with the god, Elsa spoke up.
‘It’s okay then?’
‘Yes.’
From there, the sisters turned to look at each other. They did not wait any longer for the veil of confusion had been cast away. They understood what it was they had and how to act on it.
Thus, the god went back to resting in his cave, and the sisters kissed away all lingering doubt or fear. They eventually returned to their village, and lived happily ever after.”
The old, withered woman finally ended the story. Her voice was now scratchy, as the children looked up in wonder.
They soon ran off to reenact the various adventures, and she smiled at her dear sister. 
She murmured quietly to herself, so faintly that even a bat would be hard-pressed to hear it.
“This was the story of two sisters who loved each other very much and made a journey to discover themselves.”
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puzzlepcice-a · 4 years
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senses and other oddly specific headcanons.
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tagged by: stolen ! tagging:  you, you right there !
1. what does your muse smell like?  she smells woodsy,  like a campfire, smoke, pinecones. also like fresh rain in the early morning when there's dew on the ground and honestly?? like soil but in modern verses clem has a hazelnut, cherry scent to her, mostly because it comes from the conditioner and shampoo she uses on her hair.
2. what does your muse’s hands feel like?  clems has have a few scars on them, and for the most part they're smooth to the touch, but her fingertips are calloused from all the years she's worked with her hands wielding both knife and gun. in modern verses though she has the softest hands ever, and while she's not big on fingernail polish, occasionally she paints them baby blue or a nice creamy yellow when she's feeling bored.
3. what does your muse usually eat in a day? throughout the day she’ll eat a bowl of rabbit stew flavored with a couple of spices, or cooked rabbit during her times travelling with aj with occasional (and safe) berries she picks off of bushes and gives to aj. and if they're lucky they scavenge an abandoned campsite, she snacks on stale potato and barbecue chips, or beans and canned peaches. in modern she likes snacking on either ice-cream sundaes, strawberry pudding cups she finds in her fridge, a bag of cookies, and a burger with extra mayo, extra pickles, onion and ketchup. as you can see she has a v balanced diet.
4. does your muse have a good singing voice?  clementine hums to herself sometimes, but she's never been confident to actually try her hand at singing. ( edit. I saw a cameo of melissa hutchison singing “the night will be over soon” as clem and I was shook bc it was so pretty what.)
5. does your muse have any bad habits or nervous, ticks?   she has a habit of thinking before speaking and that can get her into trouble with people, leading them into thinking she's insensitive. that goes for her abrasive side that can put people off and just think she's this tiny ball of aggression ( which is only half true excuse me) but its just a habit she needs to break. nervous tick wise sometimes she unconsciously rub the back of her neck when she's uncomfortable and start messing with her curls back there, and touches and rubs her arm that was stitched when she was eleven, its mostly when she's idle and doesn't realize she's doing it until later.
6. what does your muse usually look like/wear?   she usually wears her layered hoodies over her yellow shirt, cargo pants, high boots and her signature baseball cap she got from her dad. modern-wise,, clem likes staying comfortable and likes off the shoulder shirts, plain baseball tees, crop-tops with a hoodie tied around her waist, spaghetti straps tank tops/boxers during the days she lounges around the house.  and dark washed jeans, ripped shorts with high-top converses, rarely will you see her in a sundress in the summers but with doc matrons on. she likes short dresses occasionally with stockings, and she cant stand flipflops.
7. is your muse affectionate? how much? how so?     clem is v affectionate person. when you actually get close enough to her asdg. rolling out hugs, shoulder bumps goes for both parts platonic and romantic for her with a lot of teasing on her end. in her main twd verse she’s a huge snuggler and likes playing with her s/os hair when they’re just falling asleep, watching their back if get assigned to go on a supply run that day. they win huge brownie points if aj likes them and they treat him nicely, though. you gotta earn the goofballs blessing first before any hand-holding or kisses happen lmao. in her modern verse it goes all the same, except clems the type to make them a playlist of songs that reminders her of her s/o and send it to them. or sneak out of her own house (if she gets grounded) to invite them out on a date to the pier for some icecream and wanna hit the beach straight afterwards. she absolutely loves dates to the arcade too since she babysits aj a lot and they play a couple of games together with his other friends. she also a sucker for mementos and wanna take a thousand pictures with her s/o in silly and sweet poses.
8. what position does your muse sleep in?  clem is pretty all over the place when she sleeps, but her most common positions is on her back with a hand on her stomach or curled up on her side and, well, drooling.
9. could you hear your muse in the hallway from another room?  probably because if clem’s mad, everrrrybody knows shes mad sks.
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hazbinhoteltheories · 6 years
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What are your ships? Mine are... Husk and Angel Dust( favorite one) Baxter and Niffty/ Cheri Sir pentious and Angel Dust Vaggie and Charlie (duh) Alastor and Mimzy (duh) I have info in why i ship and every one of them [i already explained Baxter and Cheri] but im too lazy to do it all in 1 ask so ill just read your opinion on the couples
Baxter and Cherri.
I know I already talked about this one but that was at least fifty posts ago so I’ll briefly sum up what I said then. This one was one that I never thought of until you brought it up. But when I did, I started sensing Roger and Jessica Rabbit odd couple vibes. People are always surprised when they learn they are together and everyone wonders how the hell they got together and why they’re together, but they’re either oblivious to it or they don’t give a shit. They don’t need to explain their love for each other. They know their reasons and they’re reminded of them every time they look at each other.
Vaggie and Charlie. 
Possibly the most popular ship in this fandom, every single fan of Hazbin Hotel seems to have gone down with it. I’m one of those people. They are such a believable couple that I honestly thought they were a couple at first. Vaggie and Charlie are that pair of friends that everyone knows has feelings for each other except them and can’t wait for the day they finally tell each other how they feel. Unless they get impatient and tell them for them. They’re sweet, they’re adorable, they’re precious, they’re too pure for this world. I just love them.
Baxter and Nifty 
This is the couple that I think that is the most likely to happen in the actual show (besides Vaggie and Charlie of course) and might take the longest to develop. Maybe even longer than Vaggie and Charlie. It would take forever for this relationship to get going because both are sure the other could only ever see them as a friend. But all that time is only going to make the relationship stronger when it does happen. This would also be one of those couples where both people clearly provide something the other needs. For Nifty, Baxter would provide guidance and wisdom while Nifty would provide adventure and fun. Baxter comes off as someone who is really anxious to me and I think it would be good for him if he could meet someone who could take that anxiety away. Someone he can just be at ease and enjoy life with. Nifty has been in at least one abusive relationship in the past and what she could do with is a gentleman who would support her and treat her with the love and respect she deserves. These two would be the classic polar opposites that are inseparable kind of couple. But their oddness, chemistry and their ability to make it work and make it look easy would make them unforgettable.
 Alastor and Mimzy 
I heard somewhere that love is friendship set on fire. That is exactly what I think of when I think of Alastor and Mimzy as a couple. Two lovers that are also the best of friends and feel sheer joy just from being in each other’s company. I can see the relationship being a bit onesided, to begin with. With Mimzy developing feelings for Alastor first while Alastor wishes to keep things platonic. Not wanting to be mean about it, I can see Alastor trying his best to show that he likes and cares about her but when anything romantic comes up he pretends to be oblivious to, in his mind, stop things from getting awkward and to spare Mimzy’s feelings. But in reality, ends up doing the opposite of those things. But the potential for him to develop feelings of his own is still there and if he does, it’s going to be one hell of a ride. I can kind of imagine Alastor and Mimzy being like The Joker and Harley Quinn if The Joker was actually a decent person who loved Harley and all the abuse, fucked up shit and most of the angst was removed. What would be left is a crazy, zany, silly, happy couple. 
Angel Dust and Sir Pentious
Whenever I think of these two as a couple, I think of every anime with a tsundere in it ever. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. Pent is the tsundere. Angel drives him nuts at first. He finds everything about him off-putting, like how wild and crazy he his and just overall how different they are. But he might come to realise their not quite as different as he first thought. He has a wild and crazy side too, he just doesn’t realise it. And he might come to find that there’s something about Angel’s personality that he can’t help but really like and that could be what causes him to develop feelings for him. Angel dust would always be attracted to Pent but what would intrigue him is how easy he is to see through. He knows that affection is there, Pent just isn’t very good at showing it. So when he does get Pent to show affection for him, it feels like a rewarding experience. Angel’s drug habit might be a big problem though. I can see Sir Pentious wanting a reliable partner and Angels about as reliable as Rick Sanchez. Refusing to tolerate it might be good for Angel Dust though. You usually can’t convince someone to change. If they need to change they usually have to come to that realization on their own. But Pent’s tough love and strong sense of discipline might give Angel the push he needs to kick his habits for good.
Angel Dust and Husk: Of all the couple this fandom ships, I think this is the couple most likely to be already established by the time of the pilot. They also have a potential to be the most realistic couple in my opinion. A lot of shows depicts romance and love as a whirlwind hurricane of emotion. They show how what they did for each other through this and that and give a clear reason as to why they love each other as much as they do. And while I think the Hazbin would do that with a lot of its couples, I can see the show mostly just showing Husk and Angel Dust living with each other. They banter they bicker, they talk about everything under the sun. They do mundane, everyday things together just because they can and fall into a routine that’s simple but happy. I also think that their relationship could be the first time either of them thinks about settling down with someone. Settling down is not something either thought they could do but they make each other want to try. They make each other think that settling down might not be so bad. 
My ships are Vaggie/Charlie, Baxter/Alastor, Baxter/Nifty Alastor/Mimzy and Husk/Angel Dust. 
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theinvinciblenoob · 5 years
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2018! We did it! Way to go, Earth! We’re number one! We’re number one!
As we do each year, the TechCrunch Staff — our writers, our illustrators, our editors and more — have gathered together and come up with a mega list of our favorite things of 2018.
“Things” here is intentionally defined rather loosely. “Things” here can be a book, or a game, or a concept, or a thought, or an album, or anything else. It can be something that popped up for the first time in 2018, or it can be something we’ve had for a while but found a new appreciation for this year. We tried to limit it to things you, too, might be able to enjoy (so no people from our respective lives, for example) — but beyond that, if it left a positive mark in our lives in 2018, it can make the list.
Here goes!
Greg Kumparak, Editor
Google’s Night Sight Mode
Google recently added a low-light photography mode to its Pixel phones, and it’s just ridiculously good. It’s one of those “Hahaha there’s no way it really works like thaaaOH MY GOD WAIT HOW DID IT DO THAT” features. Other phone makers will be chasing this feature in 2019.
The magical combo that is the Kindle Oasis with a PopSocket
I liked my Kindle Oasis in 2017. It’s light! It’s waterproof! The battery lasts for-freakin’-ever! But the more I use it, the less certain I am that it was actually designed for human hands. The back is slippery smooth, with a weird ridge that looks like it should be easy to hold onto for extended periods of time but isn’t really.
In 2018 I stuck a PopSocket on the back and it changed everything — I’m reading more often, and for much longer stretches. My Kindle has gone from something that lives on my nightstand to something that is always with me. Between the light weight of the Oasis and the flexibility of the PopSocket, it’s the most comfortable reading experience I’ve ever had.
99% Invisible
I’ve been commuting more this year, with the upside being that I’m finally able to catch up on a thousand podcasts I’ve been wanting to listen to forever.
My favorite right now is 99% Invisible — it’s one that friends have been suggesting to me for years, and now I’m sort of mad I didn’t start listening sooner. Each episode focuses on something that we tend to overlook; the history of the places around us, the clothes we wear, the tools we use, etc. They start most episodes with a bit of narrative, then throw you face-first into a rabbit hole. They present a little dangling thread, then spend the next 20-30 minutes tugging on it until your understanding of that thing unravels and reforms. I’m hooked.
Spider-Man for PS4
This game. Just… damn.
I can’t remember the last single player game I enjoyed quite this much. It’s the first game that convinced me to pre-order all of the DLC long before I was even done with the main campaign. It’s the first game I’ve been drawn back to after completing every storyline, side quest and collectible.
There’s too much right about this game to fit into a little blurb like this, but above it all: that webswinging, though. Insomniac Games built a webswinging system that’s intuitive enough to immediately make sense, but complex enough that you can get more adept and precise every time you sit down to play. What could’ve been deeply frustrating instead feels very natural and, before long, wired in. Sequel please.
Devin Coldewey, Writer
Return of the Obra Dinn
At once an interactive storybook, a maddening logic puzzle and a beautiful game, Lucas Pope’s Return of the Obra Dinn bucks pretty much every gaming trend and is a resounding success. Tasked with investigating the fates of all hands aboard the derelict Obra Dinn using an artifact that shows you the scenes of their deaths, you work your way backwards and forward through a strange, compelling story told in freeze frame, snippets of audio and your imagination. Not for quitters — this game is hard.
Vita Nostra
I’ve been disappointed by modern sci-fi, fantasy and magical realism for years, and thought I’d try my luck with this newly translated novel touted as “Harry Potter meets metaphysics in backwater Russia.” A girl is approached by a mysterious stranger offering entrance to a mysterious school… but instead of magic the students seem to be having their minds systematically broken. I was very pleasantly surprised by the freshness, weirdness and intelligence of Vita Nostra, which is nothing like anything else I’ve read, and certainly not in the increasingly overcrowded YA genre, which this only barely fits into. I’d recommend this to anyone over 16 who’s okay with having their mind bent a bit.
My trusty iPhone SE
As everyone in the world fusses about the latest, largest phones, which notch is best and how to get the most out of your virtual assistant, I’m content with my years-old, pocket-sized iPhone SE, in my opinion the zenith of Apple’s design philosophy. It’s been discontinued (I suspect because it was still showing up newer models) and that’s a shame. I wish more things in the tech world worked as well and lasted as long as this phone.
Catherine Shu, Writer
Trekz Air
I belong to a group for fans of true crime podcasts who are also parents of young children. We were wondering how to indulge that interest without traumatizing our offspring and someone suggested bone-conduction headphones, which send sound vibrations through the bones of your cheeks and jaw, keeping your ears open so you remain aware of surrounding noises.
I bought a pair of wireless Trekz Air and they have totally changed my life. Fine, that’s hyperbole, but I love being able to listen to things while keeping an ear out for my toddler, deliveries or traffic. Not surprisingly, the sound quality doesn’t match traditional headphones, but it’s more than clear enough for spoken words. Trekz Air are lightweight and a good option for people who find earbuds uncomfortable but don’t want to lug around over-the-ear headphones. The vibrations tickle at first, but you get used to them.
Paprika (the app, not the spice)
Before downloading Paprika, using online recipes meant printing them out or smearing grease, flour and possible traces of salmonella on my iPhone. Paprika makes everything easier by downloading recipes, cutting out the 2,000 word essays and dozens of photos many food sites publish, and sorting ingredients and directions into organized sections. You also can keep an inventory of ingredients you already own and match that against meal or menu plans to automatically create grocery shopping lists. The iOS and Android apps cost a very reasonable $4.99.
NPR’s Believed podcast
Believed is often painful to listen to, but it is one of the most important podcasts released this year. Through interviews with survivors, their parents, advocates and law enforcement officials, Michigan Radio reporters Kate Wells and Lindsey Smith not only examine how Larry Nassar was able to get away with sexually abusing hundreds of girls and women for so many years, but also how his young victims eventually found their voices and succeeded in bringing him to justice. (For people raising kids, the “Gaslighting” and “The Parents” episodes are essential listening.)
BBC Radio 3 Slow Radio’s episode “Forgotten Sounds”
The episode captures many of the noises that once formed the ambient soundtrack of daily life, but are disappearing as technology advances, including typewriters, printing machines and looms. All are combined by composer Iain Chambers into a gentle medley that’s awesome for background noise if you find music too distracting while you work.
Joyful by Ingrid Fetell Lee
Lee, a designer, breaks down the aesthetic elements that induce feelings of contentment, wonder and glee: lush bouquets and bright colors, balloons bobbing in the air, gardens hidden in the city neighborhoods, the glow of sunlight against pale yellow walls, a silly pair of socks, the perfect harmony of a Rockettes’ kick line. Her book makes a solid argument for the link between good design and social well-being, while serving as a guide for how you can create more moments of transcendence and joy in your life.
Rookie on Love edited by Tavi Gevinson
I’m more than a decade older than their target age bracket, but I loved Rookie, the online magazine for teenagers edited by Tavi Gevinson, because it was the kind of thing I longed for in high school and I was just happy it existed. It also brought exposure to an amazing group of young writers and artists, including Jenny Zhang, Hazel Cills, Petra Collins and Rachel Hodgson (to name just a very truncated list).
Though the site recently announced it will stop publishing new content, this year also marked the release of  Rookie on Love, an anthology of essays, interviews and comics about all kinds of love — romantic, platonic, familial, self — and heartbreak. It is just as remarkable as the Rookie Yearbook series and cements the legacy Gevinson and her colleagues built over the last seven years.
Bougainvillea
Photo by Leonora (Ellie) Enking
Want a plant you can’t kill? Screw succulents. Get a bougainvillea instead. I bought four potted ones and they make me feel like a gardening genius. The bright pink perennial blooms also add a happy note to my balcony on cold and grey days.
Romain Dillet, Writer
VanMoof bike
2018 has been an interesting year for people living in Paris and who love bikes. In 2017, I was using Paris’ bike-sharing system (Vélib) constantly, but couldn’t anymore because the new provider made the whole system unusable.
After a lot of Ofo and Mobike rides, I became frustrated with the unpredictable nature of free-floating services. Will I find a bike? Is the bike broken? And let’s be honest, those bikes tend to suck.
So I switched to a VanMoof Smart X and I love this bike. It’s a solid, connected bike that doesn’t need a ton of attention.
People
This weekend, maybe you can leave your phone in your pocket and talk with people around you. After countless examples of Facebook missteps, multiple digital well-being dashboards and many #quitfacebook hashtags, it’s time to act.
If you were waiting for proof that social networks, ad companies and addictive engagement tricks were hurting your social behavior, now you have it. A tiny little red number shouldn’t stop you from engaging in an interesting conversation with your family, your neighbor, your Uber driver or the person waiting in line in front of you for a concert.
I’m not perfect on this front. The goal isn’t to reach perfection — being mediocre at something is OK. But trying to talk a tiny bit more with people around you is already better than clearing your Instagram feed multiple times a day.
Natasha Lomas, Writer
Open DMs on Twitter
It’s a bit of a love-hate “favorite” because my Twitter account’s noise to signal ratio has inexorably taken a (small) hit after I opened up DMs this year. But, on balance, having to tune out a bit of spam PR/worthless crypto pitches/random “suspicious” photo-messages (which are helpfully autoblocked from being displayed by Twitter anyway) has been worth it to allow some interesting new signals to filter through via direct message.
Email is an alternative channel for this, of course. But the level of inbox noise makes it challenging for this type of “alien signal” to break through. Ditto LinkedIn, which also only offers the messaging feature to paying users or existing contacts. So Twitter — at least for now — offers a decent alternative where interesting strangers can whisper in your ear. There’s no predicting what might happen to the calibre and cadence of these alien signals in the future though. Much like Slack used to claim to aid productivity until it became a self-replicating, attention-sucking virus, comms technologies work until they break from overuse (and/or corporate growth targets…).
Travis Bernard, Audience Development
Sonos’ 5.1 Surround Sound Set
My sound system stopped working this year, so I looked into getting a Sonos system. The price was initially a turn-off, but after using it for the last few months I can honestly say it’s well worth the steep price tag. The sound is stellar, but what’s more impressive was that it only took 30 minutes to set up a 5.1 surround sound system.
Megan Rose Dickey, Writer
OWL Two-way Dash Cam
It’s an always-on camera for my car that gives me peace of mind that no one is smashing my windows or towing my car.
Otter, a transcription service
These transcriptions are the actual best. This tool has become my go-to for transcribing recorded interviews.
Super Mario Party for Nintendo Switch
It’s a fun, pick-up-and-play kind of game that’s great for groups — even if half the group isn’t usually super into games.
Brian Heater, Writer
Hell-On by Neko Case
“God is not a contract or a guy / God is an unspecified tide” is one of the great opening lines, on-par with Patti Smith’s “Gloria” and Nick Cave’s “Into My Arms.”
I don’t know how, but seven records into her solo career, the sometime New Pornographer keeps getting better. Hell-On is an intricately layered and deeply personal expression from an immensely talented singer-songwriter.
Sorry to Bother You
If you haven’t had this spoiled yet, congrats. Turn off all internet notifications and go watch it immediately. Sorry to Bother You is such a beautiful brainfuck in ways the trailer, thankfully, doesn’t begin to approach. True, there’s all of the social commentary one would expect from the directorial debut of Coup frontman Boots Riley, but the movie explores the subjects through shockingly hilarious unexpected avenues.
Muse 2 headset
I’m bad at meditation. Like really, really bad. I may be the only person in the world who actually gets MORE anxious when I sit quietly with my thoughts. I’ve had mixed results with apps (Calm has been my go-to, of late), and while I initially balked at the idea of gamifying the process, I’ve actually found this wearable a useful tool in helping regain my focus, even when not wearing it.
Nancy by Olivia Jaimes
Nancy, Olivia Jaimes’ take on the octogenarian newspaper strip, feels too good for this world. Or at very least, too good for the hate-spewing comments section that follows it around on GoComics.com. You see, newspaper strips are like Ghostbusters or Star Wars. People want a fresh take on something familiar that’s somehow exactly the same as the original. Jaimes has the unenviable task of being the first woman to take on Ernie Bushmiller’s beloved strip, and some of the angrier corners of the internet have not been so kind — causing her to take on a forced anonymity. It’s not for lack of brilliance. Her take on the strip is often hilarious and frequently meta — exactly the sort of stuff we’d hope for Nancy and Sluggo.
Sharp Objects
I travel a lot and do around 75 percent of my movie watching on planes. Turns out you run out of reasonable movie choices pretty fast. Thankfully, I discovered this Showtime series at the beginning of a 16-hour flight back from Hong Kong and proceeded to watch the entire thing, front to back in one leg-cramping binge. It’s the only show that’s held my increasingly short attention span since last year’s Twin Peaks reunion. Sharp Objects leans less on the weird, but has enough left-field twists and turns to make it one of the most engaging series in recent memory.
Sarah Perez, Writer
DoublePane for macOS
I’ve used this for years as a window manager for when I have to drop from 2 screens to 1. I realized how important it was to me this year, when it was one of the first installs on a new Mac.
This $11 clear case for my iPhone XR
I mean, I drop my phone a lot and it’s not cracked yet, but feel free to spend 3x more on Apple’s version.
(also, +1 to what Greg said about PopSockets)
Bryce Durbin, Illustrator
All the Answers by Michael Kupperman
Michael Kupperman is known for hilarious, absurd comics such as Snake ‘n’ Bacon and Mark Twain’s Autobiography 1910-2010, but the author opens up about his own family history in this graphic memoir. His father is “quiz kid” Joel Kupperman, who became world-famous in his youth but retreated from the spotlight after adolescence. The memoir is beautifully rendered in stark black and white drawings as Kupperman tells his father’s life story in an effort to understand his own. Buy it here.
Meet My Friends The Friends
Meet My Friends The Friends is ostensibly a recap podcast about Friends, but you don’t have to like or know the ’90s sitcom to enjoy this.
Tom Scharpling (who also hosts The Best Show) tries to run a smooth ship that seems to be coming apart right from its launch due to infighting with his engineer(s). Running jokes about music cues, sound effects bumpers and fake ads for ridiculous companies and products build throughout the series. Unlike the sprawling Best Show, each episode of MMFTF is about 15 minutes.
Jordan Crook, Editor
Nanette by Hannah Gadsby
I’m a huge fan of stand-up comedy, but no special has ever touched my heart the way that Nanette did. Hannah Gadsby reimagines what a stand-up special can be. She feeds information to the audience bite by bite, whether it’s the sad reality of art history legends or her own personal stories, all the while narrating the underlying meaning of the special. Bottom line: Is it funny? Yes. Very. Does it go beyond funny to something more meaningful? Indeed, it does, and with a combination of authenticity and grace that are rarely paired so well.
Red Dead Redemption 2
If the holidays are a time for rest and reflection, heading into the new year means taking on new challenges. Red Dead Redemption 2 is great for both. It’s a laid back beautiful game that at times feels much more like a movie than a game, and yet the sheer volume of the game is most certainly a vast undertaking. It follows the story of a man, Arthur Morgan, but also the story of a time and place.
Brooklinen sheets
Growing up, my parents’ bed was always the best bed in the house. Not only was it a giant California King (which feels like a cruise ship to a six-year-old), but it was beautiful and had the most luxurious, soft sheets. The older I get, the more I feel pushed to make my bed just as luxurious, and Brooklinen has paved the way. The mix-and-match sheet sets are adorable, and they feel amazing. Plus, they’re pretty affordable.
Lucas Matney, Writer
Apple HomePod
I am what most would call a smart speaker power user. Despite living in an apartment with few distinct rooms, I’ve somehow gotten addicted and am situated with a dwelling that has twice as many smart speakers as it does doors.
As such, I was super intrigued by the HomePod when it came out. I was already an Apple Music user because of the enhanced support for other devices, but I’ve really enjoyed the capabilities of the HomePod beyond its nepotistic relationship with Apple Music. The voice command isolation usurps similarly priced speakers, and the speaker is incredibly well-balanced, with solid bass and volume that fits my needs. Siri’s capabilities are getting there and hopefully Apple gets a little bit more aggressive with what bits are Siri-enabled in the next iOS release. Overall, I am still a big fan of Siri’s most custom-built hardware home.
Logitech Harmony Home Hub
Combining home theater gear into a unified smart system is often the most frustrating tech task you can attempt. This year I picked up a Harmony Home Hub for about $50 and made everything a lot easier. The idea of controlling all of your gear with your phone is sometimes better in theory than it is in practice, but by using the IFTTT app you can create custom Google Assistant or Alexa controls for the Harmony Hub so that you can easily switch between audio and video outputs. I still keep my remotes around, but I’m able to do a good chunk of what I want with my voice.
Oculus Go
The perfect flight companion. I have spent a ton of time with VR headsets and, for the most part, it’s been time I wish I could get back. That being said, I’ve really liked traveling with Facebook’s Oculus Go headset on my last couple long-haul flights. A lack of self-awareness is something Santa can’t put under your tree, but spending 7 or 8 hours with a VR headset strapped to your face binging movies on an airplane is borderline magical if you can stomach the fact that you’ll end up being ridiculed in about a dozen tweets by the end of your flight.
Anthony Ha, Writer
The Leftovers
Friends — and regular listeners of our Original Content podcast — know that it takes a lot for me to stick around for more than one season of a TV show, even a show that I’m enjoying. (There’s just so much else to watch!) But this year, I finally caught up on seasons two or three of HBO’s The Leftovers, and I can now confidently state that it’s one of the best shows ever made.
Aside from maybe Twin Peaks, I can’t think of anything else that mixes goofy humor and existential despair, the surreal and the mundane, so effectively. Carrie Coon delivers an all-time great performance as Nora Durst, a woman whose entire family disappeared in the mysterious Sudden Departure, and when Justin Theroux sings “Homeward Bound,” it’s probably the most emotionally devastating karaoke performance you’ll ever see.
Forest
Like everyone whose working life has moved online, my concentration has been shot to hell, which is why I’ll happily try out anything with a halfway-decent chance of making me less distractible and more productive.
The Pomodoro technique (basically: you work without interruption in 25-minute intervals, then take short breaks) turns out to be less-than-ideal for covering breaking news, but it’s great for other, longer-form writing, like fiction. And while there are plenty of Pomodoro timers in the App Store, Forest has become my favorite, thanks to its playful design, and the cheerful scolding you get when you’re tempted to break concentration by checking your phone.
via TechCrunch
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fmservers · 5 years
Text
TechCrunch’s Favorite Things of 2018
2018! We did it! Way to go, Earth! We’re number one! We’re number one!
As we do each year, the TechCrunch Staff — our writers, our illustrators, our editors and more — have gathered together and come up with a mega list of our favorite things of 2018.
“Things” here is intentionally defined rather loosely. “Things” here can be a book, or a game, or a concept, or a thought, or an album, or anything else. It can be something that popped up for the first time in 2018, or it can be something we’ve had for a while but found a new appreciation for this year. We tried to limit it to things you, too, might be able to enjoy (so no people from our respective lives, for example) — but beyond that, if it left a positive mark in our lives in 2018, it can make the list.
Here goes!
Greg Kumparak, Editor
Google’s Night Sight Mode
Google recently added a low-light photography mode to its Pixel phones, and it’s just ridiculously good. It’s one of those “Hahaha there’s no way it really works like thaaaOH MY GOD WAIT HOW DID IT DO THAT” features. Other phone makers will be chasing this feature in 2019.
The magical combo that is the Kindle Oasis with a PopSocket
I liked my Kindle Oasis in 2017. It’s light! It’s waterproof! The battery lasts for-freakin’-ever! But the more I use it, the less certain I am that it was actually designed for human hands. The back is slippery smooth, with a weird ridge that looks like it should be easy to hold onto for extended periods of time but isn’t really.
In 2018 I stuck a PopSocket on the back and it changed everything — I’m reading more often, and for much longer stretches. My Kindle has gone from something that lives on my nightstand to something that is always with me. Between the light weight of the Oasis and the flexibility of the PopSocket, it’s the most comfortable reading experience I’ve ever had.
99% Invisible
I’ve been commuting more this year, with the upside being that I’m finally able to catch up on a thousand podcasts I’ve been wanting to listen to forever.
My favorite right now is 99% Invisible — it’s one that friends have been suggesting to me for years, and now I’m sort of mad I didn’t start listening sooner. Each episode focuses on something that we tend to overlook; the history of the places around us, the clothes we wear, the tools we use, etc. They start most episodes with a bit of narrative, then throw you face-first into a rabbit hole. They present a little dangling thread, then spend the next 20-30 minutes tugging on it until your understanding of that thing unravels and reforms. I’m hooked.
Spider-Man for PS4
This game. Just… damn.
I can’t remember the last single player game I enjoyed quite this much. It’s the first game that convinced me to pre-order all of the DLC long before I was even done with the main campaign. It’s the first game I’ve been drawn back to after completing every storyline, side quest and collectible.
There’s too much right about this game to fit into a little blurb like this, but above it all: that webswinging, though. Insomniac Games built a webswinging system that’s intuitive enough to immediately make sense, but complex enough that you can get more adept and precise every time you sit down to play. What could’ve been deeply frustrating instead feels very natural and, before long, wired in. Sequel please.
Devin Coldewey, Writer
Return of the Obra Dinn
At once an interactive storybook, a maddening logic puzzle and a beautiful game, Lucas Pope’s Return of the Obra Dinn bucks pretty much every gaming trend and is a resounding success. Tasked with investigating the fates of all hands aboard the derelict Obra Dinn using an artifact that shows you the scenes of their deaths, you work your way backwards and forward through a strange, compelling story told in freeze frame, snippets of audio and your imagination. Not for quitters — this game is hard.
Vita Nostra
I’ve been disappointed by modern sci-fi, fantasy and magical realism for years, and thought I’d try my luck with this newly translated novel touted as “Harry Potter meets metaphysics in backwater Russia.” A girl is approached by a mysterious stranger offering entrance to a mysterious school… but instead of magic the students seem to be having their minds systematically broken. I was very pleasantly surprised by the freshness, weirdness and intelligence of Vita Nostra, which is nothing like anything else I’ve read, and certainly not in the increasingly overcrowded YA genre, which this only barely fits into. I’d recommend this to anyone over 16 who’s okay with having their mind bent a bit.
My trusty iPhone SE
As everyone in the world fusses about the latest, largest phones, which notch is best and how to get the most out of your virtual assistant, I’m content with my years-old, pocket-sized iPhone SE, in my opinion the zenith of Apple’s design philosophy. It’s been discontinued (I suspect because it was still showing up newer models) and that’s a shame. I wish more things in the tech world worked as well and lasted as long as this phone.
Catherine Shu, Writer
Trekz Air
I belong to a group for fans of true crime podcasts who are also parents of young children. We were wondering how to indulge that interest without traumatizing our offspring and someone suggested bone-conduction headphones, which send sound vibrations through the bones of your cheeks and jaw, keeping your ears open so you remain aware of surrounding noises.
I bought a pair of wireless Trekz Air and they have totally changed my life. Fine, that’s hyperbole, but I love being able to listen to things while keeping an ear out for my toddler, deliveries or traffic. Not surprisingly, the sound quality doesn’t match traditional headphones, but it’s more than clear enough for spoken words. Trekz Air are lightweight and a good option for people who find earbuds uncomfortable but don’t want to lug around over-the-ear headphones. The vibrations tickle at first, but you get used to them.
Paprika (the app, not the spice)
Before downloading Paprika, using online recipes meant printing them out or smearing grease, flour and possible traces of salmonella on my iPhone. Paprika makes everything easier by downloading recipes, cutting out the 2,000 word essays and dozens of photos many food sites publish, and sorting ingredients and directions into organized sections. You also can keep an inventory of ingredients you already own and match that against meal or menu plans to automatically create grocery shopping lists. The iOS and Android apps cost a very reasonable $4.99.
NPR’s Believed podcast
Believed is often painful to listen to, but it is one of the most important podcasts released this year. Through interviews with survivors, their parents, advocates and law enforcement officials, Michigan Radio reporters Kate Wells and Lindsey Smith not only examine how Larry Nassar was able to get away with sexually abusing hundreds of girls and women for so many years, but also how his young victims eventually found their voices and succeeded in bringing him to justice. (For people raising kids, the “Gaslighting” and “The Parents” episodes are essential listening.)
BBC Radio 3 Slow Radio’s episode “Forgotten Sounds”
The episode captures many of the noises that once formed the ambient soundtrack of daily life, but are disappearing as technology advances, including typewriters, printing machines and looms. All are combined by composer Iain Chambers into a gentle medley that’s awesome for background noise if you find music too distracting while you work.
Joyful by Ingrid Fetell Lee
Lee, a designer, breaks down the aesthetic elements that induce feelings of contentment, wonder and glee: lush bouquets and bright colors, balloons bobbing in the air, gardens hidden in the city neighborhoods, the glow of sunlight against pale yellow walls, a silly pair of socks, the perfect harmony of a Rockettes’ kick line. Her book makes a solid argument for the link between good design and social well-being, while serving as a guide for how you can create more moments of transcendence and joy in your life.
Rookie on Love edited by Tavi Gevinson
I’m more than a decade older than their target age bracket, but I loved Rookie, the online magazine for teenagers edited by Tavi Gevinson, because it was the kind of thing I longed for in high school and I was just happy it existed. It also brought exposure to an amazing group of young writers and artists, including Jenny Zhang, Hazel Cills, Petra Collins and Rachel Hodgson (to name just a very truncated list).
Though the site recently announced it will stop publishing new content, this year also marked the release of  Rookie on Love, an anthology of essays, interviews and comics about all kinds of love — romantic, platonic, familial, self — and heartbreak. It is just as remarkable as the Rookie Yearbook series and cements the legacy Gevinson and her colleagues built over the last seven years.
Bougainvillea
Photo by Leonora (Ellie) Enking
Want a plant you can’t kill? Screw succulents. Get a bougainvillea instead. I bought four potted ones and they make me feel like a gardening genius. The bright pink perennial blooms also add a happy note to my balcony on cold and grey days.
Romain Dillet, Writer
VanMoof bike
2018 has been an interesting year for people living in Paris and who love bikes. In 2017, I was using Paris’ bike-sharing system (Vélib) constantly, but couldn’t anymore because the new provider made the whole system unusable.
After a lot of Ofo and Mobike rides, I became frustrated with the unpredictable nature of free-floating services. Will I find a bike? Is the bike broken? And let’s be honest, those bikes tend to suck.
So I switched to a VanMoof Smart X and I love this bike. It’s a solid, connected bike that doesn’t need a ton of attention.
People
This weekend, maybe you can leave your phone in your pocket and talk with people around you. After countless examples of Facebook missteps, multiple digital well-being dashboards and many #quitfacebook hashtags, it’s time to act.
If you were waiting for proof that social networks, ad companies and addictive engagement tricks were hurting your social behavior, now you have it. A tiny little red number shouldn’t stop you from engaging in an interesting conversation with your family, your neighbor, your Uber driver or the person waiting in line in front of you for a concert.
I’m not perfect on this front. The goal isn’t to reach perfection — being mediocre at something is OK. But trying to talk a tiny bit more with people around you is already better than clearing your Instagram feed multiple times a day.
Natasha Lomas, Writer
Open DMs on Twitter
It’s a bit of a love-hate “favorite” because my Twitter account’s noise to signal ratio has inexorably taken a (small) hit after I opened up DMs this year. But, on balance, having to tune out a bit of spam PR/worthless crypto pitches/random “suspicious” photo-messages (which are helpfully autoblocked from being displayed by Twitter anyway) has been worth it to allow some interesting new signals to filter through via direct message.
Email is an alternative channel for this, of course. But the level of inbox noise makes it challenging for this type of “alien signal” to break through. Ditto LinkedIn, which also only offers the messaging feature to paying users or existing contacts. So Twitter — at least for now — offers a decent alternative where interesting strangers can whisper in your ear. There’s no predicting what might happen to the calibre and cadence of these alien signals in the future though. Much like Slack used to claim to aid productivity until it became a self-replicating, attention-sucking virus, comms technologies work until they break from overuse (and/or corporate growth targets…).
Travis Bernard, Audience Development
Sonos’ 5.1 Surround Sound Set
My sound system stopped working this year, so I looked into getting a Sonos system. The price was initially a turn-off, but after using it for the last few months I can honestly say it’s well worth the steep price tag. The sound is stellar, but what’s more impressive was that it only took 30 minutes to set up a 5.1 surround sound system.
Megan Rose Dickey, Writer
OWL Two-way Dash Cam
It’s an always-on camera for my car that gives me peace of mind that no one is smashing my windows or towing my car.
Otter, a transcription service
These transcriptions are the actual best. This tool has become my go-to for transcribing recorded interviews.
Super Mario Party for Nintendo Switch
It’s a fun, pick-up-and-play kind of game that’s great for groups — even if half the group isn’t usually super into games.
Brian Heater, Writer
Hell-On by Neko Case
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“God is not a contract or a guy / God is an unspecified tide” is one of the great opening lines, on-par with Patti Smith’s “Gloria” and Nick Cave’s “Into My Arms.”
I don’t know how, but seven records into her solo career, the sometime New Pornographer keeps getting better. Hell-On is an intricately layered and deeply personal expression from an immensely talented singer-songwriter.
Sorry to Bother You
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If you haven’t had this spoiled yet, congrats. Turn off all internet notifications and go watch it immediately. Sorry to Bother You is such a beautiful brainfuck in ways the trailer, thankfully, doesn’t begin to approach. True, there’s all of the social commentary one would expect from the directorial debut of Coup frontman Boots Riley, but the movie explores the subjects through shockingly hilarious unexpected avenues.
Muse 2 headset
I’m bad at meditation. Like really, really bad. I may be the only person in the world who actually gets MORE anxious when I sit quietly with my thoughts. I’ve had mixed results with apps (Calm has been my go-to, of late), and while I initially balked at the idea of gamifying the process, I’ve actually found this wearable a useful tool in helping regain my focus, even when not wearing it.
Nancy by Olivia Jaimes
Nancy, Olivia Jaimes’ take on the octogenarian newspaper strip, feels too good for this world. Or at very least, too good for the hate-spewing comments section that follows it around on GoComics.com. You see, newspaper strips are like Ghostbusters or Star Wars. People want a fresh take on something familiar that’s somehow exactly the same as the original. Jaimes has the unenviable task of being the first woman to take on Ernie Bushmiller’s beloved strip, and some of the angrier corners of the internet have not been so kind — causing her to take on a forced anonymity. It’s not for lack of brilliance. Her take on the strip is often hilarious and frequently meta — exactly the sort of stuff we’d hope for Nancy and Sluggo.
Sharp Objects
I travel a lot and do around 75 percent of my movie watching on planes. Turns out you run out of reasonable movie choices pretty fast. Thankfully, I discovered this Showtime series at the beginning of a 16-hour flight back from Hong Kong and proceeded to watch the entire thing, front to back in one leg-cramping binge. It’s the only show that’s held my increasingly short attention span since last year’s Twin Peaks reunion. Sharp Objects leans less on the weird, but has enough left-field twists and turns to make it one of the most engaging series in recent memory.
Sarah Perez, Writer
DoublePane for macOS
I’ve used this for years as a window manager for when I have to drop from 2 screens to 1. I realized how important it was to me this year, when it was one of the first installs on a new Mac.
This $11 clear case for my iPhone XR
I mean, I drop my phone a lot and it’s not cracked yet, but feel free to spend 3x more on Apple’s version.
(also, +1 to what Greg said about PopSockets)
Bryce Durbin, Illustrator
All the Answers by Michael Kupperman
Michael Kupperman is known for hilarious, absurd comics such as Snake ‘n’ Bacon and Mark Twain’s Autobiography 1910-2010, but the author opens up about his own family history in this graphic memoir. His father is “quiz kid” Joel Kupperman, who became world-famous in his youth but retreated from the spotlight after adolescence. The memoir is beautifully rendered in stark black and white drawings as Kupperman tells his father’s life story in an effort to understand his own. Buy it here.
Meet My Friends The Friends
Meet My Friends The Friends is ostensibly a recap podcast about Friends, but you don’t have to like or know the ’90s sitcom to enjoy this.
Tom Scharpling (who also hosts The Best Show) tries to run a smooth ship that seems to be coming apart right from its launch due to infighting with his engineer(s). Running jokes about music cues, sound effects bumpers and fake ads for ridiculous companies and products build throughout the series. Unlike the sprawling Best Show, each episode of MMFTF is about 15 minutes.
Jordan Crook, Editor
Nanette by Hannah Gadsby
I’m a huge fan of stand-up comedy, but no special has ever touched my heart the way that Nanette did. Hannah Gadsby reimagines what a stand-up special can be. She feeds information to the audience bite by bite, whether it’s the sad reality of art history legends or her own personal stories, all the while narrating the underlying meaning of the special. Bottom line: Is it funny? Yes. Very. Does it go beyond funny to something more meaningful? Indeed, it does, and with a combination of authenticity and grace that are rarely paired so well.
Red Dead Redemption 2
If the holidays are a time for rest and reflection, heading into the new year means taking on new challenges. Red Dead Redemption 2 is great for both. It’s a laid back beautiful game that at times feels much more like a movie than a game, and yet the sheer volume of the game is most certainly a vast undertaking. It follows the story of a man, Arthur Morgan, but also the story of a time and place.
Brooklinen sheets
Growing up, my parents’ bed was always the best bed in the house. Not only was it a giant California King (which feels like a cruise ship to a six-year-old), but it was beautiful and had the most luxurious, soft sheets. The older I get, the more I feel pushed to make my bed just as luxurious, and Brooklinen has paved the way. The mix-and-match sheet sets are adorable, and they feel amazing. Plus, they’re pretty affordable.
Lucas Matney, Writer
Apple HomePod
I am what most would call a smart speaker power user. Despite living in an apartment with few distinct rooms, I’ve somehow gotten addicted and am situated with a dwelling that has twice as many smart speakers as it does doors.
As such, I was super intrigued by the HomePod when it came out. I was already an Apple Music user because of the enhanced support for other devices, but I’ve really enjoyed the capabilities of the HomePod beyond its nepotistic relationship with Apple Music. The voice command isolation usurps similarly priced speakers, and the speaker is incredibly well-balanced, with solid bass and volume that fits my needs. Siri’s capabilities are getting there and hopefully Apple gets a little bit more aggressive with what bits are Siri-enabled in the next iOS release. Overall, I am still a big fan of Siri’s most custom-built hardware home.
Logitech Harmony Home Hub
Combining home theater gear into a unified smart system is often the most frustrating tech task you can attempt. This year I picked up a Harmony Home Hub for about $50 and made everything a lot easier. The idea of controlling all of your gear with your phone is sometimes better in theory than it is in practice, but by using the IFTTT app you can create custom Google Assistant or Alexa controls for the Harmony Hub so that you can easily switch between audio and video outputs. I still keep my remotes around, but I’m able to do a good chunk of what I want with my voice.
Oculus Go
The perfect flight companion. I have spent a ton of time with VR headsets and, for the most part, it’s been time I wish I could get back. That being said, I’ve really liked traveling with Facebook’s Oculus Go headset on my last couple long-haul flights. A lack of self-awareness is something Santa can’t put under your tree, but spending 7 or 8 hours with a VR headset strapped to your face binging movies on an airplane is borderline magical if you can stomach the fact that you’ll end up being ridiculed in about a dozen tweets by the end of your flight.
Anthony Ha, Writer
The Leftovers
Friends — and regular listeners of our Original Content podcast — know that it takes a lot for me to stick around for more than one season of a TV show, even a show that I’m enjoying. (There’s just so much else to watch!) But this year, I finally caught up on seasons two or three of HBO’s The Leftovers, and I can now confidently state that it’s one of the best shows ever made.
Aside from maybe Twin Peaks, I can’t think of anything else that mixes goofy humor and existential despair, the surreal and the mundane, so effectively. Carrie Coon delivers an all-time great performance as Nora Durst, a woman whose entire family disappeared in the mysterious Sudden Departure, and when Justin Theroux sings “Homeward Bound,” it’s probably the most emotionally devastating karaoke performance you’ll ever see.
Forest
Like everyone whose working life has moved online, my concentration has been shot to hell, which is why I’ll happily try out anything with a halfway-decent chance of making me less distractible and more productive.
The Pomodoro technique (basically: you work without interruption in 25-minute intervals, then take short breaks) turns out to be less-than-ideal for covering breaking news, but it’s great for other, longer-form writing, like fiction. And while there are plenty of Pomodoro timers in the App Store, Forest has become my favorite, thanks to its playful design, and the cheerful scolding you get when you’re tempted to break concentration by checking your phone.
Via Greg Kumparak https://techcrunch.com
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