#just some thoughts and rambles

[applestruda]

Im going to be insane on saturday ill never shut up

#many rambles in tags btw #struda rambles #ive been in such an art slump as of late #id hate to think burnout is hitting me but to be fair i went for over a whole year where i was in a state of constantly putting out art #i kinda figured it hit me sooner or later #i think the timing of both school starting up and the ontent drought hasnt really helped though #still i really hope s10 can spark things up a little again #get me back to drawing #(though to be fair rn when i get free time i tend to hop on artimator smp bc i love my friends) #just some thoughts and rambles #*content #i misspelled it earlier but im on mobile rn and dont feel like fixing it

[kazscrows]

If we end up getting the SoC spin-off I’m really curious about what they’ll do with the Wylan and Kuwei dynamic. I don’t just mean how they interact. Like we better get this someday:

Kuwei turned to Jesper. “You should visit me in Ravka. We could learn to use our powers together.”

“How about I push you in the canal and we see if you know how to swim?” Wylan said with a very passable imitation of Kaz’s glare.

But I mean the whole plot of Kuwei and Wylan having the same face. I wonder if they’ll reduce the amount of time they look the same or not. Part of me hopes they don’t since it’s such an impactful part of the story and yet another part of me is kind of sad that it could mean almost an entire season of the show without Jack Wolfe actually being in it. I guess he’d still voice Wylan even if his face is different. Anyways I’m just really curious how they’ll translate all of that on screen and I hope they don’t screw everything up.

#just some thoughts and rambles #still crossing all my fingers and toes that we even get the spin-off #wylan van eck #kuwei yul bo #six of crows #shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #grishaverse #crooked kingdom #soc #six of crows spin off #SaB

[tawaifeddiediaz]

you know what boils my blood.

over the last 2 weeks, i've seen countless patients walk into my urgent care center, symptomatic for so many things, refusing to get tested for covid and flu, citing that they don't want to knowingly bring it to their holiday tables. i had a patient tell me, verbatim, "i don't want to test for covid, because i don't want to be the asshole who brings it on a plane."

i understand that - i understand that holidays are times where people look forward to meeting loved ones that they might only see once a year, or where they get a break from the hectic back and forth of their lives.

but here's the thing - whether they get tested or not, they will bring whatever they have to their holiday tables. it's pure recklessness to know that you're sick, and walk into someone else's house spreading the disease.

today, january 2, i saw 91 patients, many of them who have tested positive for covid and flu. many of these patients are the same ones who didn't want testing 3 days ago, until their events were over, and now, they will have to reach out to everyone they know to let them know that they were positive because they were showing symptoms well before their event.

the next week or two? we're going to see many, many more, all people with symptoms that started around christmas. these are the only two viruses we test for rapidly in our office, but they are potent and can be fatal in many people.

so here's why i wrote this post, and maybe it's a little late, but - if you care about your loved ones, please get tested if you know you're sick. it doesn't have to be at a clinic if you don't want it to, because the over-the-counter tests work just fine too (if you test within 5-7 days of symptom onset). just...please don't try to run from the knowledge that you might have covid, because immunocompromised people, elderly people, people with co-morbidities like asthma, pregnancy, diabetes, etc...many of them may not recover. and they may not be sitting at your holiday table in the future because of it.

#zee rambles #this isn't to guilt trip anyone #but im so so tired of people coming in and just refusing testing because they want to see grandma or whatever #and on top of that people are avoiding vaccinations and all that too?? #we all lived through the pandemic - everyone saw how many people unfortunately passed away from it #now because of vaccinations and some amount of herd immunity we're finding milder cases in healthy people #but that doesn't mean its gone #that doesn't mean it doesn't have long-term repercussions even in healthy people and that doesn't mean people aren't still dying from it #honestly i just needed a lil rant #and if this helps at least one person??? im all for it #also i can't sleep so here we are spilling thoughts into the voidddd

[somnimagus]

My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.

[id in alt text]

#legend of zelda #loz #twilight princess #loz tp #i'm still reeling that someone sent me an ask about this one.. that they took the time to find my tumblr and tell me they liked it #it really meant a lot; thank you to anyone that stops to leave comments like that. they make me happy #but yeah! here's the usual symbolism ramble: #i thought it'd be cool to have the 'spirits' flowing one way and the cats walking through them the other way #to kinda show the difference in life inhabiting the village in the past and present #link's face is covered because impaz was just waiting for 'the hero' so his clothes are what matters; not his face #and it (hopefully) gives a surreal and intangible sense to 'the hero' she could only hope would actually show up #you can feel free to interpret the glowy blue sheikah as ghosts or just as memories of the past! i couldn't decide either way #the one on the bottom left is oot impa since she's implied to be the village founder. so i guess she would be a ghost actually? #fan art #my art #project stuff #and ahhh the book-- everyone's stuff is so beautiful!! #especially the writing. some of the fics made me really tear up and some were so fun and clever. i really love them #a lot of them captured the sheer burden of the role of the sheikah; all of the time and grief and doubt #i know i always say this stuff about every project but. the people i get to work with in these are truly so skilled every time

[goblins-riddles-or-frocks]

forever obsessed with dynamics between vampires, specifically that of a maker and fledgling, as a way to explore abuse. the creation of a vampire itself can so easily be a literalization of the lasting impacts of trauma and also much more simply the ways a perpetrator might shape their victim’s very identity. the extremes of isolation in the way that the new vampire, in most narratives, must cut all ties to their mortal life, or else go through an elaborate charade to maintain the facade of humanity, while forever still being removed from it. and the sheer dependence and vulnerability of being in an entirely new state of being, wholly uncertain of what it entails, and relying on another person to define… everything.

#or just the moral dilemmas #rewatching amc interview is kind of making me insane #that moment in episode two when louis is looking for a sort of assurance in the fact that lestat may actually have some good in him #look at how he cares about music look at the simple wondrous things that can bring him joy #and then the immediate dread when the opera performance turns out to be imperfect because he knows how lestat will react to *that* #I think there’s also something really interesting in the highlighting of lestat upbraids the less skilled singer before killing him #(slowly) #but also I will wait to watch more before I articulate my thoughts #vampires #interview with the vampire #amc interview with the vampire #i ramble sometimes #I do still find the lestat and claudia film and novel dynamic by far the most compelling for how she tries to usurp him but almost to be him #but I’m enjoying this #I’m very curious if I will like show claudia more on rewatch #the movie always resonated most with me (sue me lol) because there seemed to be more simultaneous fondness and attachment even at the end

[the-witchhunter]

DP x DC worlds greatest detectives ramble

You ever just get a bit tired of the batfamily being dumb?

Sure I appreciate a good “Danny is weird and the Bats try to figure out his deal and draw wrong conclusions based on incomplete evidence” fic as much as the next guy, and I’m definitely not saying not to write them

But the thing is, they’re all really smart. It’s their whole thing, they’re a family of detectives that dress up in colorful costumes and fight crime, but detectives nonetheless

And I get it’s for humorous effect to have otherwise intelligent people be incredibly dumb about one thing, but it’d just be nice to see them be smart sometimes. Even in a fic where they’re drawing the wrong conclusions, it’d be nice to see them use their detective skills

Like build a case so solid Danny questions whether they’re actually right about him and if he’s just confused

Or just apply it to more conventional situations/crimes

Because frankly it’s funnier if you show they’re smart before having them do something really stupid

If you build them up a bit, then it’s funnier when they fall down.

“Where did he go? It’s like he vanished into thin air!?”

“Don’t be silly, see these scuff marks? Someone recently went down this way. The gravel here has been disturbed indicating this manhole cover has been moved recently. Now if we just prop this up…”

“…huh, is that…?”

“Killer Croc and not the twink we were just tracking?”

“Yeah, that”

“Yeah, that’s killer croc… hi Waylon”

*large scaly hand darts out and drags Bat in question down in the sewers while Danny watches invisibly*

#dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dpxdc #dp x dc ramble #just some thoughts #it’s just getting a little old to see them mainly used in idiot plots #they’re extremely intelligent people #I get it’s harder to write people being intelligent than it is for them to be dumb #but it’d be nice to acknowledge that they are actually successful detectives sometimes #they have their issues #stubbornness and not always communicating #but they’re clever

[journey-to-the-attic]

one thing about ik is that she will always reach out

#obey me #art #i had the idea for this and managed to bulldoze through drawing it all without losing motivation halfway through #but Do Not expect me to post art this frequently in future #idk how to do panels so if the middle bit with the text might be laid out weird #i added the stars and feathers and stuff because there was a bunch of empty space around the boxes #obey me satan #jtta ik #(btw the crumbling symbol next to the exploding feather is the wrath symbol from in-game) #(with the pride symbol attached upside down at the bottom) #(not so much symbolism as it is just me whacking you over the head with the point but it looks cool) #i had a lot of fun doing satan's more monstrous design so i might try my hand at some of the other demons later? #i do have some ideas for levi (deep sea creatures are just really fun) #also happy nightbringer release day!! it showed up on my homescreen like half an hour ago and i was like “wait what” #for some reason i thought it wasn't releasing til next week?? #the new genshin patch is today as well so looks like i'll have plenty to do with the rest of my free time for the easter hols #(i promise i'm also working on the next chapter of jtta but i am so stuck on how to get lucifer actually Talking) #anyway. here's a gold star for making it through all my rambling in the tags for anyone who did so: ⭐

[raepliica]

priest guy sending mixed signals, what is he up to?🤨🕶🤏

~~~

[Image Description: A warm-toned comic featuring Trigun98 characters. It opens with Vash shouting "YOWCH!!" as a half-eaten donut flies through the air, a bruise on Vash's tongue. Meryl, editing papers, is annoyed as he complains: "Ow! Ow! I bi'e my 'ongue..." "What's the rush?" Meryl asks, "They're all yours." Vash, still hurt, tries to explain: "They're jus' sooo good!" Meryl argues back, "Well, savour it then!" Wolfwood has been watching the scene unfold as Meryl continues, "Satisfying your sweet tooth doesn't come cheap, unfortunately." Wolfwood clicks his lighter open and closed, again and again. Without a word, he leans closer, his thumb on Vash's lips. "Wolfwood...?" Vash trails off. Then, Wolfwood opens Vash's mouth and knicks his thumb on one of Vash's canines in one fell swoop. "Wah? Huh??" Vash says as Wolfwood pulls his bleeding thumb away. He licks the blood off the wound then snickers at Vash. Meryl looks disgusted, Vash has lit up in an embarrassed explosion, and Milly remarks, curious: "Those are surprisingly sharp, Mr. Vash!" Question marks float around Vash, and his donuts lay discarded on the table. Each panel is signed by raepliica. End ID]

#trigun #trigun 1998 #trigun 98 #vash the stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #meryl stryfe #milly thompson #vashwood #raepliica_art #ww has a thing for vash's fangs (because i said so) #i just know ww has had some interesting thoughts about those fangs the moment he noticed them‼️🦅🦅💥🦅💥 #tbh i saw a wolf skull and went haha vash fangies (proceeded to black out for a week to draw this) #98ww is the most normal ww?🤔 WRONG‼️ he's a freak like the other ones! but kinda in a different way #ww flustering vash by being the weirder one>>>>>> #meryl's dwindling sanity as collateral damage<3 #if u squint real hard this is a polygun art #okay maybe it doesn't look like it at all... but it is to me #polycule casually hanging out and one of them HAS to be a freak in public ugh🙄🙄 #anyway im rambling ajsksh🏃🏃 #enjoy this full colour comic i did to practice while thinking i had lost the ability to colour:] (this is what only doing b&w will do to u) #described #thank you starberry-skies for the id!!♥︎

[grizzersmamma]

Nikto Distribution System?

So, as @ghouljams has mentioned in their Ghost Distribution System, we can all agree that Simon is basically a stray cat in disguise. He sees his human and goes "ah yes, that one's mine," and will let you lure him into your house with a few treats and praises. Good luck getting rid of him after that.

König is that big, excitable dog who comes crashing into your life, most likely bowling you over in the process. He's knocking things over and jumping all over you, blasting straight through all of your boundaries. Don't bother shouting at him, it'll just made him more excited.

But Nikto? He's more like that dog at the pound slated for euthanasia. He's aggressive and untrusting and has learned that it's better to bite first than to wait for someone to show their true colours. Not many people are willing to take a chance on an animal like that, and those that do are treated with suspicion.

You need to sit patiently with him, let him approach you in his own good time and never push his boundaries. It takes a long time for him to start trusting you, but once he realises you're not like everyone else? You're not just going to dump him back at the shelter the moment he shows any problematic behaviour? You have the most loyal dog known to man.

He will guard you with his life. He would kill for you, tear into the hands of anyone that gets too close, and then show his bloodied teeth to you for praise. He wants to be a good boy, but keeping you safe is more important than that and he doesn't care how many times he has to get hurt to do so.

For you, he's just a cuddly pup, more than willing to curl up on the couch next to you for a nap. With everyone else? They can't even get past the front gate without being snarled at. For outsiders he's nothing but a danger, and you're really the only person who can keep him on a tight leash.

He resource guards you like no tomorrow, very possessive of you and scared someone will take you from him. He might seem like a big, scary monster, but even rabid dogs only bite because they're in pain.

#call of duty modern warfare #simon ghost riley #könig call of duty #nikto call of duty #nikto x reader #just doing some rambling #I have some thoughts

[smilesrobotlover]

Heh

#posting this now before big name aus get the idea too #idk I was looking at the mangas and how they’re drawn is somewhat similar #like their tunics #link between links #lbl first #lbl fierce deity #I’ve been… having thoughts #I was gonna keep this a secret but I honestly got scared #that some big au was gonna have the same idea as me #and people would think that I was jumping a bandwagon #and like there’s nothing wrong with doing that #but idk #it’s my pride talkin #now I HAVE seen random artists playing with this idea so I’m def not the first one to think of this #but yeah #I want First to be bright and like the sun #while fierce is dark and like the moon #anyways I’m rambling #just take it

[wolf-2099]

No more fighting and shaming people for their type of f/os. Support and love for all kinds of f/os Now.

✰ You have live action f/os? Maybe even only live action f/os?? That's awesome!! Your f/os from movies? Tv shows? Some independent series/project? That's so cool!

✰ You have anime f/os? Does your f/o list have popular characters from this season's newest anime or the most popular anime phone games? Love that for you! Glad you're having fun with your latest interests.

✰ You have f/os from video games? That's cool! Recent releases? Maybe even older games, last generation? Or maybe games even older than that? Indie games only a handful of people know, or indie games everyone knows? That's amazing!

✰ Your f/os come from children's shows or movies? Are they animated, or maybe live action, or one of the shows that use puppets? That's really great, I'm glad you can find beauty in these shows people might say you're too old for. Never let anyone stop your love for your interests.

✰ Your f/os are from comic?? Me too! Are they from big name series or maybe the lesser known ones? Are they indie comics? Maybe even webcomics?? Hell yeah, great taste.

✰ F/os from podcasts? Actual plays/liveplays?? Novels?? Yes!! How fun!! It can be hard when there's very few visuals of your f/os and all of your content is just audio/writing, but it's sweet that you can find so much love for them that you don't need visuals.

✰ Maybe your f/os are from something I didn't even think of. If so, I love that. Your taste and love for your f/os is unique!! And I'm glad I get to learn more about it :)

I think it's great that there is such a wide variety of types and tastes when it comes to self shipping. Some people's f/o lists are only super attractive anime pretty boys, some are from clunky PS2/Xbox games, some don't even have visuals of what they look like, some you've seen everywhere and some you've never heard of in your life. It's great, our differences are what make all of us coming together even more beautiful, I think.

[If you're an adult that ages up characters under 18 or are pro.ship or whatever, this post isn't for you to reblog]

#dragon's ramblings #had a thought that made me mad. remembered some ppl who like. genuinely would shit on ppl for their f/os #why be elitist and mean abt ppl's tastes. you wouldnt want someone to be mean to you. #i have friends who like anime boys. weird video game men. comic characters. children's cartoon characters. #friends who's f/os are human and some who are monsters and some who are just little creatures and weirdly shaped #and i love it i love to see it #ok i gotta go shower for work now. bye #self ship #self ship community #self ship positivity

[gay-otlc]

When people say they struggle with keeping track of all the tone tags (the ones like /j or /gen), everyone who disregards that by responding "it's just memorizing some abbreviations/acronyms, it's not that hard, stop complaining" is ableist and a fucking hypocrite. If you're going to advocate for accessibility, advocate for accessibility for all of us.

You can't claim to be an ally to neurodivergent and disabled people and then shit on us for our symptoms. If you actually care about helping us, why aren't you listening when we say we struggle with something? It's never okay to tell disabled people they should be able to do something they can't, that it's not that hard, but it's especially not okay if you do so while pretending to support disabled people.

Also, in addition to the "it's not that hard" statement being ableist, it's utter bullshit. There are so many tone tags to keep track of and memorize. I did a quick google search and one of my top results had ninety one tone tags. That's a lot. That's probably a lot even for a neurotypical person, and I'm not a neurotypical person. I struggle to remember a lot of basic, necessary tasks, so I really can't memorize ninety one tone tags.

Especially when some of them are incredibly ambiguous- only one letter? Acronyms or abbreviations at least give you some clues, one letter tone tags are so incredibly confusing. Like, what does /t mean? There are a lot of words that start with T! (This is a rhetorical question. I know /t means "teasing," but I only know the answer because figuring that out was a memorably frustrating experience.)

And /t is just one example of a tone tag I learned because I kept seeing it in conversation and not understanding and being really confused and frustrated. I can't tell you the number of times I've been messaging someone on discord, and they say something with a tone tag I don't recognize, and I just open a new tab to google the meaning, which is where I find lists like the one above. I usually rely on google instead of asking the person what they meant, because I feel stupid and embarrassed for not knowing this code that everyone else seemingly gets.

Which is exactly how it feels when I don't understand someone's tone in real life! Confused and frustrated and ashamed. And tone tags were supposed to help neurodivergent and disabled people not feel that way, so I don't know how we reached a point where they cause those feelings in many of us.

I can't deny that tone tags are a useful accessibility tool for some. If you find them helpful, it's genuinely good that you have that resource. But they're not accessible for all of us. It's incorrect to act like tone tags are a perfect way to communicate, and it's ableist to disregard our struggles with them and tell us to just try harder.

Either listen to those of us who say they have trouble understanding tone tags, or stop pretending you actually give a shit about accessibility.

#this was meant to be just those first two paragraphs about ableism + hypocrisy but then i kept on rambling. i am incapable of shutting up #anyway. had some thoughts about the disk horse and then i had more thoughts and more thoughts and more thoughts #tone tags #tone indicators

[barb-l]

As a desperate lesbian who has been wanting a sapphic Wednesday portrayed for AAAAGES now, I still can't believe these things that the show gave me:

THE Wednesday Addams being shown jealous of a character that barely has any lines MULTIPLE times just because Enid mayyybe wants to choose said minor character as a roomie/bestie over her

BFFs Thing and Enid ganging up on Wednesday over her fashion sense and her pouting about it

Wednesday, who takes pride in her independence and relishes in isolation, admitting to have missed anyone is unthinkable. But she did! In her own way. Even if she was roundabout with her admittance, the fact that she got called out by both Thing and the goddamn villain shows how down bad she was during that fallout with Enid

"Thing said he missed you" and the way she visibly struggles against her nature to say "Skip the tape" with the tape symbolizing her breaking down her walls for Enid

something about Thornhill, who is played by an actress who also used to play Wednesday, telling this new Wednesday that she has to admit someday how much Enid has come to mean to her is just... ugh. Will never get over how much it adds so many layers to Wednesday's self-denial.

she held off all the insults in her bottomless vocabulary so she wouldn't completely offend Enid over the snood she made for her. She sugarcoated her words for Enid, which Wednesday NEVER does. In fact, it's the opposite of what she always does!

Enid VS Tyler bearing so much resemblance to that classic trope where the Love Interest saves the girl from the other Love Interest, even being a parallel to the fight between Gomez and Garret over Morticia

Enid lamented how she would never find a mate because she's not a real werewolf and would hence die alone, to which Wednesday remarks that it's a good thing in episode one. To emphasize Wednesday's apparent indifference to isolation, she is told that her nature as a raven means that she is fated to be alone like Enid feared for herself. In the finale, after Wednesday accepts that she doesn't want to be alone in the wake of her fallout with Enid, Enid finally wolfs out to save Wednesday. Enid made Wednesday realize that she doesn't actually like being alone, at least not when it meant she wouldn't have Enid by her side. In turn, Wednesday's life being threatened gave Enid the push to finally wolf out and, supposedly, now be given an opportunity to be eligible for a mate. I mean... I don't have high hopes, but the narrative is making it too easy to make it look like they were meant for each other

The heavy implication that Wednesday joined the Poe Cup because Bianca specifically said she wanted to make Enid cry over losing. The fact that she always deflected whenever Enid tried to confirm that Wednesday is doing it for her, but she never outright denied it!

"The mark you have left on me is indelible" and "I'll think of you" about Enid aksnnzzinsosnsj she gets sooooo sappy for herrrr

THE HUG. For people she's very very soft for, like her family, she only ever let THEM touch her. She's never show to start or reciprocate. SHE pulls Enid back into her. She holds Enid just as tightly, despite the injuries and despite Enid's pink coat. Enid toughens up for her but Wednesday is so vulnerable for her my god im so ill for them 💀

#wednesday netflix #Wenclair #might add some more later #i just have so many thoughts while im running on so little sleep #there was no goal to this post #i just wanted to ramble #im gonna pass out now byee

[neolxzr]

OK so heres some of my favorite things that were talked about during the enter the florpus commentary thing yesterday:

one of jhonen's favorite things in the whole movie is the writing in zim's kitchen that says "do anything is real?"

they clarified specifically that gir was not lying and he did in fact eat a baby at the crazy taco

gir smells REALLY bad. theres like rotting organic matter in his body at all times. he stinks

zim's human suit is made out of actual human skin

zim is acting drunk on nacho cheese during that scene in his house because richard horvitz recorded it while drunk

they planned to have this whole thing with tak's ship only agreeing to go to moo-ping 10 because it knows tak is there. they wouldve shown her in silhouette during that brief explosion and she wouldve stowed away on the ship without anyone knowing and then wouldve shown up towards the end of the movie, but they decided to cut it out

zim did not need to frame membrane for a crime in order to get him into space prison and likely just tossed the guards like 5 bucks for it. its a shady place. they did specify though that if he did frame him for something, it would have been jaywalking

they pointed out during that scene where zim is celebrating peace day on dib's lawn that zim's reaction to seeing dib was very much genuine and that's just how his brain works. he is genuinely surprised to see him pop out of his own house. (they also described his reaction as like "being surprised to see your best friend")

the ham joke was ABSOLUTELY CRITICAL to the film and at some point jhonen remembered it and was like GUYS. WE ALMOST FORGOT THE HAM

there was supposed to be this joke where it cuts to and from gaz and dib in tak's ship and they would've had to stop at like a warp station or something and theyd be waiting in a long queue of spaceships and the radio is broken in the ship so theyre stuck listening to that one song. then itd cut to them like totally braindead drooling from listening to it for so long. and then a little later itd cut back a FINAL time and theyd know all of the words and both be singing along to it. but this was also cut out so only the last bit remained

when asked "who would win: minimoose or mrs. bitters?" the answer was along the lines of "neither, i think all of us lose in that scenario"

the tallest are just two dudes who happen to be the same height and therefore have to share the same job. they are not brothers and they are also not gay lovers ("as much as you want them to be, they are not. there is no love in this universe")

skooge is in fact alive and lives in zim's basement. they wanted to keep the number of "hey remember this thing from the tv show!" moments to a minimum so he was not mentioned in the movie. but he is there

#cryn rambles #invader zim #this is based pretty much entirely off of my memory btw Sorry i was not taking notes #im sure people will be uploading clips and stuff i saw people recording on their phones at different points #but i was not one of them. my phone was already like 3/4ths of the way dead when i walked in #also zadf real ANYWAYYY #kinda obsessed w jhonen's rapr shade LMAO #the whole thing was fucking hysterical im so glad i was able to go #anyways. there was so much more but these were some of my favs or just ones i thought were notable #also jhonen was excited for alan wake 2 today. my friend (big alan wake fan) was very excited to hear this info #iz tag

[saltpepperbeard]

no because really, i think stede is operating in a way he thinks will win him respect. i think he's operating in a way he thinks is the expectation. i don't think he likes it, and i don't think it's "him," but i think he enjoys the positive reinforcement from everyone around him. he's literally never had that before in his life.

he was bullied as a child for what he enjoyed. he was cast aside by his father for being himself. the crew threatened to mutiny against him or even just flat-out kill him because he was too "weak."

and here he is trying to pull himself up out of maelstrom of mistakes. "he's been a failure his whole life." he's trying to do everything he can to rectify that. he wants to be the lighthouse for his crew. he wants to be a good captain. he wants to be a good pirate. he wants to be a good lover. he wants to be something.

and he was actually getting there himself--he just didn't realize it. listening to his crew more, showing them kindness, leading them when they were lost and had no place to go, putting his own grief on hold and taking back the revenge...

he was getting there! but still, he was surrounded by those haunting expectations, by the fear that it wasn't enough.

the whole conversation between he and ed where ed is encouraging him to command respect/be tougher. the whole conversation between he and izzy where izzy says he's "never met anyone with a total lack of skills." zheng saying that she didn't "conquer china by letting people go on and on about their feelings."

not to mention the goading from ned. "once you kill me, you're a real pirate. you're not an amateur." "see? that's why he likes you. your bumbling amateur status."

it all keeps swimming circles around him, looming above his head like a shadow.

he thinks he has something more to prove. he thinks he has to be more. even though his own methods work, like ned's crew turning on him simply because stede showed kindness and understanding, all these phantoms keep telling him it isn't enough and that the other methods are more effective.

because he kills, and looks visibly shaken by it, but his crew cheers. he grabs ed by the collar despite them wanting to take things slow, and they grow intimate. he walks into jackie'z after it all, a place where he was previously banished from, and is treated like a sort of pirate hero.

it's not him. "we don't just banish people, do we? that's not us."

but it's encouraged. it's celebrated. so he thinks it should be.

#OFMD #OFMD Season 2 #OFMD S2 Spoilers #Stede Bonnet #Revenge Rambles #WHEW #listen #listen listen #i have trust #i have faith #i really truly believe he's just caught up way WAY too much in all of this #that he's in WAYYYYY over his head #that he's riding the wave of FEELING like someone #and isn't really taking anything else into account #because like #idk man #as someone who has struggled to fit in and struggled to be respected/treated well by my peers through school #i did some things that i would normally not do #i acted in ways uncharacteristic for me #and i thought i enjoyed them at the time #i rode the thrill of getting approval from everyone else #but looking back on it now #it was absolutely NOT worth it and was not something i'd do presently #i just did it simply because i thought i had to #and i think that's more of what's going on with stede right now

[captaincolorblob]

Everyday i think about this screenboard scene that got semi-scrapped from Donnie vs Witch Town, like it just explains so much about Donnie as a character and i’m very sad we didnt get to see it entirely

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise donnie #like it just reveals that donnie has thought his only use to the team is being usefull via his tech #and feared he might get replaced or wasnt needed anymore #and instead of talking about it he bottled it up and it turned into aggression towards magic #like god we need to use this angst potentional more #cause it explains /why/ donnie was so stoneset on using his tech instead of mystic magic and kept saying how its better #and why his tech is usually gadgets or things that help him and/or his family #he thought thats all he's good for #apologies if i keep repeating things i'm a sucker for donnie angst and this makes me go wild #listen donnie vs witch town is not a high ranked episode on the tier list for me that scene next to the fight scene was the only part #i enjoyed a lot #and i wish they kept the entire screenboard in cause it explains a lot about donnies character and gives some drama #dia rambles #edit cause this post gained way more notes then i ever had or imagined i would ever have:: #i am flattered and virtually high-fiveing every one of you folk that said they liked my tags #i was unsure if i should even put the ramble there cause i wasnt sure if people were even gonna read it #so if means the world to me seeing people in the notes having the same reaction towards the screenboard and liking my ramble in the tags #HOWEVER i would greatly apprichiate everyone who copypasted my tags to at least credit me #some have given credit and i'm gratefull for y'all and i understand that maybe theres still the glitch for mobile users and you can always #edit your rb #I'm not mad or upset at anyone i would just really prefer it if people at least prev tagged me #ALSO SIDE NOTE to all the folk that said they'd maybe draw/animate/write smth with this a) i put the link to the full screenboard in a rb #and b) please tag/dm me or send me an ask to inform me cause i would LOVE to see it