#just whining its.

[soldier-poet-king]

Ughhhhh

Like tried to open the "hey I'm thinking abt moving out" discussion and it just. Hm

- why leave when you can save so much money living here

- implications of them being hurt because I'm leaving more because this house is slowly killing me and less because of my horrific 2.5hr daily commute

- I need to live in a community again. I can't do suburbs anymore. Even urban loneliness is better than this. At least there are people about. I can go pop into little shops. Join a club. Deadass wandering around a mall would feel less isolating than this. ANYTHING

- unspoken but present "no one in our family has moved out until they got married", ESP for the women on my mother's side, and even then they moved literally down the street and formed a weird codependent dysfunctionional situation that I can't seem to extricate myself from

- it's expensive but I am going to kill someone and then myself if I have to stay here longer. I haven't had a life since 2020. And yeah partially that's covid and even more so it's Living Here and slowly dying a bit everyday after having been free and on my own for 8 yrs

- I spent those 8 yrs putting myself back together slowly and figuring out who I wanted and needed to be and within a year of being back I came the closest to forced involuntary psychiatric hold that I've ever been and I don't think that's a coincidence. The move is not entirely to blame. But it's hard to help myself in an environment like this one. I'm going to need a whole lifetime to piece myself back together and I still don't think it'll ever sit right or be whole again

- but if I leave who'll look out for bro 3. The baby. The sensitive one. The one most similar in temperament to me. Or it'll hurt my parents feelings and what little progress they've made will backslide and everything will get worse again and maybe my dad will *** and it'll just be. My fault.

-bro 2 fucked off across the country without guilt and I wish I could just not care but unfortunately I was raised to be the therapist and carer and my whole purpose of being is to sacrifice myself for other people's comfort so what else am I supposed to do. I have to make up for myself somehow

- my parents bought a starter home with shitty jobs when they were younger than me. I'm maybe NEVER going to be able to afford property, but if I don't start "wasting" money every month on rent I'm not going to live long enough for that to BE a problem. Let alone things like investing and retirement savings. But what if I lose my job or smthn goes drastically wrong and I end up back here with my tail between my legs anyways. Idk if I could survive that again

I am so goddam tired of every decision I make being the wrong one for my family. Of none of my (significant!) accomplishments mattering because they're not the traditional milestones. No I've never had a relationship, I've never even been in a date or been kissed. I'm a weird unattractive person and that's fine because I'm particular and peculiar about relationships anyway. Even if I hate that and I'm defined by hunger and grief. No I'm not engaged or married with kids. I'm tired of me appearing years behind my peers socially because I had to spend so long recovering from wanting to die all the time that I don't feel my age or maturity level even tho I AM comptent at my job and also just good and social lying to appear friendly and normal. I'm tired of being nanny and therapist and mom and all of these horrible gendered responsibilities that I never wanted and can't escape and have shaped me and ruined me and idk what I am without them and I can't even feel resentful without guilt because isn't that what I'm FOR. What else am I for than that. That's my purpose and my Duty and Obligation and I'm weak and selfish for chafing against it. I'm not allowed to love parts of my family and culture and then hate and resent all the ones that have hurt and trapped me and will continue to do so until either I, or all of them, are dead.

All I did was hurt and/or upset both my parents which makes everything worse for everyone in this hell house and maybe that's not my fault or responsibility but it sure feels like it is, and I can't escape it regardless.

I'm so goddam tired

#franposting #just whining its. #yeah #suicide mention cw #IM FINE DW IM TAGGING TO BE SAFE FOR OTHERS #im deeply miserable but im fine. i even ate dinner AND fruit #AND made lunch for tmrw #im just. gonna go watch arcane. or read naruto. both of which will hurt me #but maybe it needs to be external rn #work tmrw. and soo many meetings bc my boss is back and i have to like. showcase that i was ok left alone for 2 weeks #and was actually productive #why am i here. whats the purpose. the reason. the goal of it all. what am i supposed to be doing #beyond simple hollow pleasures to keep me going #so i can drag myself out of bed everyday out of a sense of duty #and that i have to keep going bc maybe itll make the world even the slightest bit better than i found it #and im now allowed any easy outs #i. am once again. going to do a hair mask. literally the only emotional cure all i know other than booze. which is. bad. obvs

[demadogs]

CORALINE (2009) dir. Henry Selick

#these look crazy on my phone and i wasnt originally gonna post but i havent posted a gif in a while and im bored #will i ever post a gifset without whining about how it looks on mobile probably not #and the thing is it literally might just be my phone like i have an iphone mini its tiny #its a very real possibility that it looks completely fine for you guys and you never know what im talking about when i bitch about it lmao #but anyways its about time i gif her!!!! shes my GIRL #my gifs #coralineedit #coraline #henry selick #userallisyn #userreh #dailyanimatedgifs #dailyflicks #filmedit #tuserai #userrobin #films #bookstofilms #1k

[yuwuta]

you ask yuuta if he wants a bite of your food and when he says yes you offer your plate to him, but he’s just sat there looking at you with his dumb big bambi boy eyes and his mouth slightly open and he will not look away or blink or close his mouth until you lift your fork to his lips to feed him and then he grins like shit’s sweet and hums about how good the food is like nothing happened like he’s not ridiculously attractive. gonna chew on steel

#he consistently does shit like this is like he's not stupidly attractive and its because he does not know. he does not know that he's hot #the yuuta/yuuji divide is that they’re both bad asl and neither know it but yuuji is Not innocent and yuuta is just naive [at first] #which is me saying yuuji is kind but yuuta is just Nice once again #insane i need to bash his head against a table. and kiss him i guess whatever #also who expects to be fed when you offer them food: toge but he KNOWS he's being annoying and whines if u dont feed him #gojo/yuuji/choso are the opposite #gojo asks if u want some of his food and then won't let u have any unless u let him feed it to you. nd if u want to avoid a scene u have to #he just babies people :((///// he does this to everyone . will cry #yuuji also does it reflexively like hes like 'oh! this is good you should try it!' and before u can even agree he's got his spoon #in your mouth and smiling like 😇 its good right!🥰......angel boy #choso...do i need to say it isn't there canonical evidence for this #oh also u offer food to toji and he just kinda tilts his head like oh what ur not gonna feed me? like no. stinky. feed YOURSELF! #yuuta okkotsu.................... when i get my hands on this boy.... #💌.yuuta

[illir]

his eyepatch strap got tangled in his hair

#dramatic bf vs traumatised bf #sherliam #william james moriarty #sherlock holmes #moriarty the patriot #yuukoku no moriarty #yuumori #my art #i was making the nyc art dump post and then thinking i want this one to have its own post haha #i just wanted to draw liam whining actually

[cypress-is-cy]

Puppy boys deserve cock in their face and balls in their mouth!! Its so enriching for them i promise theyll moan and suck them

#oki now im actually gonna sleep i promise #everyone just has to know that balls are so soothing for dumb puppy boys oki pls let them suck and huff them #also!! cock on the face!! its also so good and necessary for puppy boys!! #its like putting a treat on a puppys nose and they cant reach it and all they can do is whine as their mind goes fuzzy from the scent #puppy sub #pet pl4y #trans puppy #nsft puppy

[daenystheedreamer]

dont like when people try to masculinise/feminise targ names when genderbending cos valyrian names are already gendered based purely on vibes. daenys and rhaenys are feminine but aenys is masculine, and its not the prefix because daeron and rhaegar are masc but aerea is feminine. viserys jaehaerys aerys are masc but naerys daenerys are fem. yeah -a names tend to be fem and -on tend to be masc but even these have weird extras, like -ar names are masc despite similarity to -a. feminine non -ys names tend to end in -a but then there’s gael. basically a girl can be daemon and a boy can be rhaenyra

#asoiaf #its based on what sounds feminine or masculine to a culturally 20th/21st century american anglophone man #thi is all just me whining cos i hate non-canon valyrian names they never sound right #daemma and luceaerea. No.

[enden-k]

taru, somewhere in the waters for who knows how long after he broke out from underwater jail, possibly reliving abyss trauma or smth, while fontaine is about to be flooded :

"yea hell be fine"

my bbg falling and scraping the entirety of his ass in a tournament :

#i rewatch the scene and THE INSANE FEELINGS I GET GAAAAAAAAH I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF HIS BRUISES AND CARE FOR HIM #HE HAS BAD POSTURE AND BACK PAINS AND IS IN HIS THIRTIES HE DEF TWISTED SMTH HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW EXIST AND CRY ABOUT GETTING OLD even tho he #never did so before bc 30 is not old at all but still young but its rather the realiziation that he indeed is getting older and feeling it #so its settling in and giving him a crisis he accidentally got himself into when he was just meaning to whine about his bone pains and #haithams just looking blankly into the camera before he continues cleaning his cuts and scrapes and tells him to calm down and stop fussing #and then kaveh eventually calms down from the entire tournament and the fall and brainwash attempt and the thing about his father and sees #that his reaction rlly was just piled up from everything that had happened today and just got out over smth as trivial as some aching bones #(and prob a twisted knee or smth) #im rambling its my mushy brain #i should focus on doing the trial LMAO #babbles #genshin tag

[moeblob]

So I haven't done much in terms of actual plot BUT I pulled a boy therefore I had to celebrate so I drew him and I know almost nothing about him BUT he gives off gremlin vibes at the end of his ultimate + a lot of official art.

If I'm wrong, oops my bad! I just got hyped over a guy unit.

#honkai star rail #yanqing #he looks like a gremlin in so many art refs and its fine i love him #i should have listened to his voice lines more but i got distracted #by listening to landau sisters voice lines and then samp lines about the older landau sibs #and come on this is like the vibes of a family where one of the siblings is not to be mentioned yet everyone mentions him #like wow we would disown our adopted brother if we could get rid of him but we cant so we will just whine about him #gep come home pls i need an army of blonde kids #tag tangent aside i actually really enjoy yanqings design ??? hes a cute little fella

[moonlume]

tumblr said draw something bad so I did but I'm mad I still didn't feel anything

#man i started tagging this and i cant even bring myself to do it. hashtag art hashtag illustration hashtag capitalism. #sorry to be sadposting... tumblr is the only place i can admit ive actually been really really struggling with my love for art... #i should be grateful. i should be thankful for the fact that i can do art as my job. i shouldnt be whining about it like this. #but theres a hole in my soul where my joy for creating used to be and i dont know how to fix it. i want to love to draw again. #its been like this for probably over a year now and i dont know what to do. i cant abandon everything ive been working on for 7 years. #im also unemployable. so its not like i would dare to quit moonlume...but i just want to find joy in it again... #but capitalism has dug its wretched claws into my skull so badly that everything has been feeling incredibly soulless. i hate it. #anyway. might delete this later. its unprofessional but this is the one website where i can let go of professionalism for 5min and be human. #i dont hate what i do and i really am thankful..i just i wish i wasnt so stressed about making everything look good and perfect and sellable #but at this point its subconsciously connected to my survival that every time i think about drawing i stress myself out before i even start #ugh idk. neither here nor there. cant quit but dont feel connected to my work but cant change what i do or i will alienate my audience 👍

[camels-pen]

Usopp briefly needing a high vantage point, so Sanji launches him into the air with "Armée de L'air: Darling Shoot!"

Usopp is not pleased with the name because it doesn't sound tough enough. (Also maybe this is something they've practiced a few times on the ship. It's uniquely suited to them because Usopp is long ranged and trusts Sanji to catch him after. Also, Sanji is very used to catching, launching, and kicking Usopp, so he knows what works and what doesn't)

(this doesn't work with the others consistently because either they don't want to/fighting style doesn't fit with it, they know Sanji won't bother catching them, and/or Sanji himself does not want to launch them if he doesn't absolutely have to [Zoro; he is fine with that])

(alternatively, this works just fine with the others, but Sanji wants it to be his and Usopp's 'thing' unless absolutely necessary)

#one piece #nemotime #sanuso #usopp #sanji #Usopp bans Sanji from crawling into his hammock for a couple nights the first time Sanji says the name in battle #he pouts and sulks about it. Usopp i mean. Sanji is being sad and pathetic about his punishment too but in a different flavour #can't decide if Sanji should just keep the name and have this be a recurring cycle with them every time they use it #or if Sanji should try new names each time that are progressively more sappy and get him even more time in the dog house #both are funny so it's a hard choice hmmm #oh Usopp's suggestions aren't good either btw. they sound cool to him (and Luffy and Chopper who were his brainstorming buddies for it) but #they are very lame. in a cute way. Sanji refuses to use any of them though #he definitely kicks Usopp's shins a bit if he starts insisting on something too much #Usopp will get all dramatic and whine about it but Sanji is basically just tapping him. its barely a kick. Usopp will still say he should #get recompense in the form of sole naming rights. Sanji kicks him noticeably harder for that #hmm. i could move this from the tags to the post but. nah

[whoviandoodler]

im sorry but HOW did I not hear how absolutely insane 'howl's moving castle' (the book) is, like everyone is like omg the ghibli movie is so wack and meanwhile og howl is welsh and has a fucking phd what the fuck what the absolute fuck

#howl's moving castle #howl's moving castle book #hmc book #the first half of the book is so normal and like the movie #and then it punches u out of left fucking field #the movie is extremely enjoyable but the book has characters with Teeth in it so i like it diferently #howell????? #im crying screaming etc #i havent finished yet btw so no spoilers pls #i had to take a break bcs i was mindblown #like if id read it on its own id be like damn thats so cool!! but i came in w expectations #so my brain is just whining #dan talks

[barbatosgossipsection]

Sometimes i think this fandom have some mysoginist issue ✌🏻, why you hate lilith? If the brothers see you as lilith replacement that totally wrong, there's no way lucifer will fck Mc if their just lilit replacement :) they are sibling.

Just because lucifer have dejavu doesnt mean he's see you as lilith 😒.

13 will never steal the boys, come on..Stop read too much (replacment) aus.

Lucifer just admired maddi's beauty but he's not interested or fallin in love with her.. thats normal for him to talk about gorgeous people (we do the same btw, even we already have lover we still talk about handsome or pretty people)

— Anon

#barbatosgossipsection #★ is a poll option if you're indecisive or just want to see reuslts! #THOSE fans whine so hard when madi or any woman is mentioned like calm down they're not getting that dick everyday its all yours lil bro #obeyme #obey me #omswd #confession #queuecifer #obey me general #obey me fandom

[suguru-getos]

cockwarming geto sama while he tends to the visitors and lets them worship the both of you 🥵

#please my brain is a mush #i love the fact that suguru would just have his close eyed feline smirk. 😏 #holding u close and peppering soft kisses while u struggle & whine 😩 #hes gonna be like ‘sshh~~ its okay #‘​‘show em’ what my little baby has’’ #its just rlly hot and makes me all bothered #sugu who sees ppl look at u wrongly and tramples them :)) #u cant rlly complain now bc why?? they’re being PERVS!! #geto suguru #geto thirst #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk thirst

[mamawasatesttube]

impressive. just looked at the timkon tag on ao3 and not one fic on the front page today is actually about timkon.

#rimi talks #like... i wasnt expecting much from the timkon tag bc it is after all always a hellscape #but wow! the bar was low and yet... #*dont tell me about filters i know how to use filters thats not the point of this observation #the point is that i think its grating when a ship is treated as just the default setting in the background #like you just HAVE to pair them off even if youre not writing about either of them as characters #this is grating behavior to me. broadly pervasive but grating #anyways im mostly just whining bc im having such an awful fatigue day out of the blue and that makes me grumbly #like i CAN filter and i DO use filters but also the fact that the ship tag is So incredibly unusable bc of default treatment is annoying yk

[baby-xemnas]

can i be honest. i am so over one piece posts because of oversaturation, i block the tag, but i will always visit your tumblr every so often because i love the idea and content of bepolaw so much. theyre so good and hot and wonderful. your content specifically. bepolaw real, even if idk jack shit about the series

anon's one piece:

maybe the real treasure were the bear best friends we kissed along the way

thank you so much for the message ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ makes me super happy that you check my stuff specifically and its an exception :)))))) thats very very nice ♥

#anonymous #oversaturation is real even to me and im a fan #used to be more invested in the wank and the whole community hype part of it #when i first got in it in 2014 (?) #because i love communities and i was dumber and wasted myself more on arguing and whining lol #i try to do less of that now #anyway #i returned now thanks to epic bepo chan crumbs but i catch myself returning to old habits #like getting mad at fucking posts #and im like oh my god.....this shit again. not going back to tha old me #like i see that tidal wave of bullshit #like opening reply section under a popular post and see all the screeching #and woah mama that makes me wanna RUN #and i dont mean just the ''dudebro'' (i dont use that term seriously anymore its crap) part of it #fujo side is not much better #bigger fandom more people more annoying people #it all scales up

[yaboisnelf]

im so tired. have dickroy sketches cus i havent posted in 2 months. i wont post again ❤️ when i do itll have duke prommy

#digital art #sketch #dc #procreate #dick grayson #roy harper #they are the worst couple ever. i hope they die happy together. #dg pussy is an illness ☹️☹️☹️ that roy is happy to have 😏😏 its terminal ‼️‼️‼️ #'jason isnt the angry robin' ok well. have you considered hes a 12 year old boy. with evil older brother. yeah. #hes still not yk but also all of them aee because thats (imo) the point of robin. childrens rightous anger at a world that harms them yk #i have a timeline. theyre very on and off couple core. they argue on vacations. theyre never not touching eachother #how many jokes can i fit in here #one time dg was sobbing at the kitchen table and roy was like 'omg r u ok :(' and dg went 'LOOK AT HIM :((((' and sticks his arm out #and shows the ugliest fucking action figure roy has ever seen of himself and roys like 'hes really ugly' and dgs like 'IK I LOVE HIM SMMM' #sometimes when that happens roy asks if dicks on his period #when dg is mad at roy he'll whine to people about him w roy right beside him. roy is normal and just whines to any animal or child he finds #ok im done ❤️