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disaster-writer · 1 year

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Teenage Dirtbag (Part 1/2)

Pairing: Rodrick Heffley x Reader

Summary: You and Rodrick Heffley grew up right next door to each other. You’re best friends and nothing could ever change that… at least that’s what you’ve always thought.

Rating: R 18+

Word count: 5k

A/N: I do not have a taglist

Suburbia.

Middle class, overwhelmingly white, everybody knows your name, suburbia.

You hated it, you were making a run for it once you graduated and you were going to make it big time.

That is, if you could just survive your annoying little brother until then—

“Give it back you little turd—“

”Mom said no more name calling!” Your eleven year old brother giggled as he ran opposite of you around the dining room table. He held your toaster waffle in his grimy little hands.

”I don’t give a shit— you’re gonna make me late!” You ran left and he ran right, swiftly evading you.

”What? Afraid your boyfriend is gonna ditch you and make you walk to school!” He practically cackled.

”Rodricks not my— ughh, just give me my breakfast you shit!” You leapt across the table, making your brother squeal like a little girl.

”(Y/N),” your mother suddenly hissed, entering the kitchen, “What did I say about name calling?”

”He stole my breakfast,” you threw back, laying across the table.

”David give your sister her waffle back. And both of you, go over to the Heffley’s already, Susan’s doing me a favor by driving you to school David, don’t keep her waiting.” Your mother said pointedly, her heels clipping against the linoleum floor as she moved about the kitchen to get her coffee brewed before heading off to work.

She continued talking but as your eyes landed back on your brother, her voice suspiciously morphed into the teachers voice from the peanuts.

Your brothers eyes landed on you as well, your waffle held in the air. Both your eyes darting back and forth to the breakfast food. That was until he daringly put the waffle in his mouth and took a bite.

That’s fucking it—

“You know what mom?” You suddenly jumped off the table, sounding chipper, “Rodrick said that he could give David a ride to school instead.”

”What?” your brother asked apprehensively, suddenly shaking in his shoes at your words.

”Huh? Really?” She asked surprised, turning to look at you, “Rodrick Heffley said he’d drive your brother to school?” She clearly wasn’t buying it. After years and years of seeing that boy hang around you, she knew he wasn’t handing out favors.

”Yeah, really.” You grinned, your gaze suddenly snapping to your brother and pinning him to the spot. A threat and a promise hanging in the air.

”Well… tell him I said thank you then. And honey, don’t you think you went a little heavy on the eyeliner today— what did you do to your jeans!” She then hissed in horror at the gaping holes in the knees of your pants.

”Leave me alone, it’s cool,” you scoffed and walked around the table, grabbing your brothers arm tight and dragging him out of the kitchen.

“You’re joking— Rodrick doesn’t even have backseats—“ your brother panicked behind you.

”I know. Maybe think twice about whose waffle you decide to eat.” The two of you grabbed your backpacks before you opened and slammed the front door behind you.

“This is a cruel and unusual punishment— you can go to jail for this—“

”Can it idiot,” you snapped, dragging your brother to the house right next door. The house that belonged to the Heffleys.

You knocked on their front door before letting yourself in. It was practically your second home at this point and Susan told you not to even bother waiting for someone to answer the door.

You pushed him forward before letting yourself in.

“Hi Susan, Hi Frank,” you called out, not bothering to greet them properly before bounding up the stairs and letting your brother wander around on his own in search of Greg. You heard muffled responses from the kitchen.

Once on the second floor you headed straight for the attic staircase, taking two at a time before finding the lump under the bedsheets you were looking for.

Now it was time for your favorite game.

You made your way over to Rodricks bed, grabbing two drumsticks on the way. You weren’t even trying to be quiet, floorboards creaking loudly under your feet.

Soon you stood above him, a devious grin painted on your face at how peaceful he looked in his sleep.

Time to ruin that.

You took both drumsticks and carefully stuck each of them up his nose, giggling quietly as you managed to get them to stay stuck in his nose. You then quickly took out your phone and started taking as many pictures of him as you could before he woke up.

Rodrick sniffled, trying to breathe past the objects obstructing his airway. You giggled harder watching as his nostrils twitched and flared and soon his whole face was screwed up in discomfort.

You burst out loudly in a fit of laughter, doubling over as he shot out of bed in a panic, the drumsticks falling out of his nose with gravity.

His groggy mind took a second to grasp the situation, but once it did he was quickly reaching out for you.

”You little—“

You yelped as his arms wrapped around your waist and he pulled you down against the bed with him. You struggled in his grasp, still laughing as he pinned you against his chest.

“Let. Go.” You wheezed through your laughter.

”Delete those photos!”

You continued to struggle in his grasp before he suddenly let go, causing you to fall off the bed with a grunt.

You blinked, staring up at the ceiling until Rodricks head popped over the side of his bed. His eyes narrowing.

”Stealing my look?”

You scoffed, “You don’t own eyeliner Heffley— by the way, you have to drive my brother to school today.”

”What? Why?” He complained, eyes following you as you stood up and plopped yourself right on his bed.

”I need to teach the little shit a lesson.”

”And you had to drag me into it,” he flopped backwards onto his bed.

“Coming from the guy that drags me into nearly every stupid idea he has.”

”You come willingly,” he said, pointing at you with a drumstick.

”Sure I do. Now get dressed so we can go,” you jumped to your feet, sprinting back down the stairs, whatever he said next falling on deaf ears.

You made your way back down stairs and into the kitchen where the rest of the Heffley’s, plus your brother, were gathered.

You sat yourself down and kicked your feet up on the breakfast table, reaching over for a pop tart that sat out on the table.

”Mornin’” you greeted through a mouthful of food.

”Morning…” Frank trailed off, staring at your feet propped up right next to him. The newspaper in his hand forgotten.

”Honey, you know what I’ve said about feet on the table.”

You sighed, pulling your feet off and sitting cross legged on the chair instead. “Sorry.”

”That’s alright and uh… you look nice?”

”Thanks,” you grinned.

”Yeah, the makeup is a bold choice,” Greg muttered sarcastically, making your brother laugh.

You narrowed your eyes and shut the both of them up. Greg had always gotten on your nerves the same way your little brother did.

”Rodrick said he’d drive Greg and David to school so you don’t have to.”

”He is?” Susan questioned. However, her shock quickly turned into excitement, “And he suggested this himself?”

”Sure did,” you grinned, taking another bite of your pop tart.

”Why would he do that?” Greg asked.

”Maybe your brother’s turning a new coin, don’t stop him from growing as a person.”

Suddenly, all six of you heard a shriek, your heads whipping towards the staircase as Rodrick stomped down the stairs.

”Mom! What did you do to my pants!?” He exclaimed, running into the kitchen, lifting a leg and pointing to the matter at hand.

Your gaze followed where he directed and you had to stifle a laugh.

For some reason, the rips in his jeans were patched with baby pink fabric.

”Oh, I fixed them for you,” Susan grinned, satisfied with herself. “They were torn to shreds so I patched them up.”

Rodrick stared at his mother with wide eyes, completely at a loss for how to respond, “I ripped them on purpose. And why did you use pink!” You bit down on your lip to keep from laughing, as his voice was becoming squeaky with frustration.

Susan rolled her eyes with a shake of her head, “Honestly Rodrick, I do you a favor and you only complain about it. Why would you rip your jeans in the first place? So you can look sloppy at school?”

”He wants to trick people into thinking he’s a famous rockstar,” you threw in. “I told him it was a stupid idea and that he was wasting the hard earned money you spend on his clothes by tearing them up but he just wouldn’t listen to reason,” you shrugged.

”Wha— It was your idea!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking abou— ahh,” you yelped as Rodrick charged forward and grabbed your leg, lifting it above the table and practically knocking you off the chair. Manny suddenly clapping with all the commotion.

”See! You did it too,” he pointed to the giant rips at the knees in your jeans, “She’s lying mom, she helped me rip them—“

”Okay, enough,” Susan said sharply, “She’s not my child so I can’t scold her. And it’s already— 7:45,” She suddenly gasped, seeing how late it was, “Will you all get ready so you’re not late to school.”

”Fine. Where are my other jeans?” Rodrick asked, dropping your leg and making you grunt.

”In the wash. I checked all your other pairs for tears and they all smelled so I’m washing them now. You’re lucky I set aside a pair for you this morning.”

”You’re saying, I have to go to school in these?” Rodrick asked, pointing at the monstrosity in question.

”Yes. Maybe next time you’ll think twice before ruining your clothes. Now all of you go.”

You sighed, getting up from your seat and slinging your backpack over your shoulder, your pop tart still in hand.

You glanced down at Rodrick’s jeans again and scoffed out another laugh, before passing him.

”Gimme that,” Rodrick scoffed right back, snatching your pop tart and shoving it in his mouth.

”Hey— that was mine!”

”I don’t care, traitor,” Rodrick’s words muffled by the pop tart, “C’mon turd nuggets,” he yelled over his shoulder to the middle schoolers, who nervously followed you two.

”Calm down already. I’ll help you rip the patches off,” you rolled your eyes, pulling the front door open with him suddenly pushing you forward.

The younger kids shut the door behind all of you.

”I can’t with those two,” Susan sighed. “All these years and I still can’t figure out if they’re good or bad influences on each other.”

”Well, anyone that can keep Rodrick from sleeping straight through an entire day is good in my books,” Frank said, placing his newspaper down, and taking a sip of his coffee.

“… You’re sure you don’t think they’re in a relationship?” Susan asked, making Frank sigh.

“We’ve been over this honey. Rodrick’s too… he’s not…” Frank tried to select the words carefully as to not say out loud that he thought his son was dumb as a box of rocks. “I just don’t think he’d be able to keep a secret like that.”

”Yeah… you’re right I guess. They just— they seem to be,” Susan glanced at her youngest son, choosin her own words carefully now, “Very comfortable with each other.”

Frank looked up in thought, thinking about how close the two of you seemed… how much closer the two of you seemed after this summer specifically…. Even more specifically after a certain vacation you guys went on with your friends back in July. “You don’t think they’ve…”

Susan raised her eyebrows and shrugged.

”No— no, they couldn’t have.”

”I don’t know Frank. I’m just saying it’s something we should look out for. You know how teenagers are.”

Frank swallowed nervously at the thought of mini Rodricks running around the house.

—

If you had to choose, this was probably your favorite pastime. Riding around in the Löded Diper van, screaming Guns N Roses at the top of yours and Rodricks terrible voices, all the while tormenting your little brothers in the back.

Nothing beats this.

“Welcome to the jungle!— stop moving! I’m gonna stab you!” You yelled over the music as your head was practically in Rodricks lap as you tried to rip up the patches from his jeans… which wasn’t exactly a good look for either of you if anyone decided to look in.

”I’m trying!” He yelled back, “I can’t when I’m driving— stop pushing on my leg, you’re gonna make me hit the car in front of us.”

”You want these patches off or what?”

Rodrick just grunted in response, slamming on the breaks at a red light.

Your brothers’ screams in the back were like music to both of your ears.

“We’re gonna die,” David panted as both him and Greg finally stopped flying around the back of the van.

”I know,” Greg responded. “Why do we get stuck with these two as our siblings— I know someone whose brother takes him out for ice cream after school every Friday.”

”With our luck Rodrick and (Y/N) will get married one day and then we’ll never be able to get rid of them.”

”Ew— ahh!” Greg’s nose screwed up in disgust at the idea of you two marrying each other, right before being jolted backwards as Rodrick slammed on the gas.

A few more minutes of driving and you all came to another rough stop, the music clicking off. “Get out losers,” Rodrick yelled behind him, lifting his leg so you could get a better angle at ripping the threads.

”But we’re not at school,” Greg said, peering out the back window.

”You both have two legs. Walk,” You answered back, throwing a pink patch behind your seats.

”You two just wanna make out, don’t you,” Your brother spat.

You and Rodrick instinctively looked at each other, faces screwed up in disgust.

”Ew,” he hissed.

”As if,” you scoffed, “Now go before I kick your ass.”

You managed to rip off the rest of the patches before school started, his jeans once again looking like the distressed mess you both created in the first place. And you only got away with one stab to his leg, and a little bit of blood but he didn’t need to know about that part.

Parking the van, you both stumbled out, making your way to the building for another day full of napping through lessons.

And hey, you were only twenty minutes late today.

—

You truly didn’t understand why you and the rest of your friends even bothered with school at this point. You weren’t sure a single one of you got through an entire day without skipping or falling asleep in at least one class and you all just copied off of others homework.

Those friends, being the rest of the members of Löded Diper… you didn’t have many girlfriends, for some reason they thought it was weird you hung out around these guys so much. But you didn’t care, you were all going to be famous after high school. You were only a roadie and supporter of the band but that wasn’t going to stop you from becoming famous.

Before you knew it, this fine Friday was over and you and the band would be free for the entire weekend to screw around like usual.

By 3:10 you were climbing into the passenger side of Rodrick’s van once again. Rodrick in the drivers seat and the rest of the guys in the back.

As if on cue, an arm was thrown around the back of your seat and a head popped between you and Rodrick.

“Hello beautiful,” Ben greeted, leaning forward to place a kiss on your cheek only to be stopped by your hand against his face.

”Hi Ben,” you grinned, “And how was your day?”

”Good,” he mumbled against your hand, picking his lips against your palm in a weak kiss.

”Enough,” Rodrick said, pushing his friend into the back by the shoulder.

”I’m impressed,” you said, seeing all three of them there, “Not a single one of us got detention today.”

”No, I did,” Chris said, “I’m just skipping.”

”Nice,” the rest of you nodded.

With that Rodrick put the van into drive and sped out of the school’s parking lot.

Unlike your little brothers, Ben, Chris, and eventually Bill once you picked him up, actually knew how to have fun. They all laughed and cheered as they were being thrown around the van instead of whining like a bunch of babies.

Finally making it into the garage of the Heffley’s house you found yourself making yourself comfortable on the couch in the garage as Löded Diper began their rehearsal, cheering for them as they all played.

The other thing about the suburbs was when you were stuck in high school and you lived in the suburbs, the monotony of it all took quite the toll on you. There was nothing to keep you occupied, no way to have fun, which was why you and Rodrick were usually left to your own devices and had to find the fun somewhere else.

You would include the other guys as you were all together for the most part, but living right next door to the Heffleys and not only that, being able to see into each other’s rooms, you and Rodrick did tend to spend most of your time together. Because even when you weren’t allowed to see each other due to being grounded or whatnot, you still both snuck each other into the other’s room just to hang out.

Huh… you were starting to see why your brother was convinced you two were dating.

And maybe you would if you were Heather or Rodrick was… literally anybody else.

It was an hour into rehearsal already, you bopped your head along with the atrocious music, singing their awful lyrics to yourself.

That was until Susan came in.

”Rodrick,” she tried, but they kept playing, “Rodrick,” she tried again, this time effectively getting all of you to shut up. “I need to talk to you inside. Now.”

”Oooh,” you instigated, quickly shutting up when Susan shot you a look.

Rodrick stood up, walking around the drumset, “Go ahead and talk. We’re a band,” he came to a stop in front of his mom, “We have no secrets.”

”Okay, fine.” She then pulled out a magazine from behind her back and held it in front of her. Your eyes nearly popped out of your head at the dirty magazine she found.

Rodrick was stunned, “Tha—“ he pointed at the magazine, “That’s not mine,” he was wavering, you could tell.

”Well, it was in your backpack—“

”No, it was in my room.”

Idiot.

“Does owning this magazine make you a better person?”

It looked like it was time for a lecture.

“No.”

”Did it make you more popular at school?”

“Yes,” Rodrick nodded, looking around at all of you before his eyes landed back on his mom and he realized that that was in fact the wrong answer, “No.” he quickly took back.

“How do you feel about,” she took a step forward, “Having owned this, type of magazine?”

Rodrick thought for a second, “… Ashamed,” he grinned.

”Nice,” Chris cheered.

Susan nodded, her grip so tight on the magazine that you were sure she’d rip it any second. She took another step forward, face to face with her son, “Do you have anything you want to say,” she placed a hand over her heart, “To women. For having owned this offensive magazine?”

Rodrick stared down at his mom, struggling for words.

“I’m sorry, women.”

The rest of the guys started clapping for Rodrick until Susan pinned them with a sharp look, making them stop.

”And I want you to apologize to (Y/N).”

Rodrick scoffed, glancing at you on the couch before looking back at his mom, “Why?”

”Why?” Susan asked, affronted, “Because she is a beautiful young woman that you consider a friend. Owning this magazine is offensive to girls like her.”

”Um… I don’t really care Susan—“ you quickly shut your mouth as she shot you another look.

”Yeah but (Y/N) isn’t like a woman woman,” Rodrick said.

“Excuse me?” Susan hissed.

”Y’know what I mean,” he was starting to flounder again, “She-she’s not like the women in the magazine…” he trailed off.

”What? Just because she isn’t taking naked photos on motorcycles, you don’t consider her a woman?”

”I wouldn’t be opposed to that,” Ben suddenly tried to joke, making you roll your eyes.

Susan ignored him, watching as Rodrick really didn’t know the answer to these questions anymore. “Uh— yes— no. I don’t know, she’s just (Y/N)—“

”Apologize,” she cut him off sharply.

Rodrick then shuffled his way to you, standing in front of your seated form, “I’m sorry for owning that magazine (Y/N).”

“And,” Susan snapped.

”And for not seeing you as a woman…?” He glanced back at his mom to make sure he said the right thing but was only met with an eye roll.

”I forgive you,” you played along, “And don’t worry. I don’t see you as a man,” you grinned sharply as the others all cheered at your diss.

“You’re grounded for two weeks,” Susan said, she was so angry her voice was shaking. She then swiftly turned around and began to stalk out of the garage.

”Ok settle down Susan. I think one week is plenty!”

She quickly turned back around on her heel, “Make it four weeks and I’m gonna need the keys to your van!”

”My van?”

”Yes. Your van. And I want all of you out of here in an hour.” With that she turned around and left the garage.

”I’m gonna become a stripper just to spite you Heffley,” you grunted in annoyance at his whole woman comment about you.

”Yes! I support you (Y/N)!” Ben cheered.

“Yeah that’ll show me,” Rodrick grumbled, “Let’s just get one more song in.” With that he seated himself behind his drum set and the boys practiced for some more.

—

“I bet you feel pretty stupid now for owning that magazine,” you called out, sitting on the roof just outside your window, staring up at Rodrick as he leaned out his window.

”I don’t even know how she found it,” he practically whined. “I hid it under my bed, and she never checks there anymore after The Thing she found under there.”

”Oh right, that.” You shivered at the memory of what you and Rodrick now called ‘The Thing’ that may have been alive at one point under his bed. “Did she take your keys yet.”

”Yeah.”

”Are you banned from driving to school too?”

”I’m banned from driving anywhere. That includes your car.”

”Shit.” You hissed. That meant you’d have to drive the two of you to school instead and you weren’t exactly comfortable behind the wheel yet.

A comfortable silence filled the air between you two, and you sighed, basking in the cooling air as the sun was setting.

”Y’know Heather Hills asked about you today.”

”Really?”

”No,” you laughed. He always fell for that.

He frowned, ”Yeah well, Nick asked about you today.”

”Really?”

”No,” he laughed loudly.

Oh right. You always fell for that too.

”Asshole.”

”Bitch.”

“I’m gonna tell your mother you’re not being very respectful towards women again.”

”Then have fun driving me to school for two months instead of one.”

”Whatever,” you grumbled under your breath. “Are we still hanging out tomorrow or are you taking the grounding thing seriously this time.”

”We can hang,” he grumbled gnawing at a hangnail now. “Y’know it was probably my stupid brother that told her.”

”Maybe it was. He likes sneaking into your room doesn’t he.”

”Yeah…. Yeah,” Rodrick’s eyes lit up as he seemed to realize something, “That little—“ Rodrick quickly took off after that, leaving you to laugh at the entire situation by yourself.

—

People often wonder why me and Rodrick aren’t a couple. And I always tell them that I grew up with him. I see him nearly 24/7. He’s usually the first person I talk to in the morning. We have breakfast together, go to school together, we even share a bunch of the same classes. We usually even get detention together. We also torture our brothers together.

And what am I supposed to do after school when I’m bored and alone at home? Well I’d just have to go over to my best friends house that I’ve already seen all day anyway, because what else am I supposed to do? And what? Am I just not supposed to hang out with him and the other guys when they come over to rehearse. We even used to have sleepovers a lot when we were younger, but ever since high school our parents banned us from those. I think they’re scared we’re gonna fuck or something.

As if.

Rodrick’s more like a brother to me I think. I mean, I see him just as much if not more than my own brother anyway.

So of course I wouldn’t fuck him. You don’t fuck your brother bcuz ew.

Anyway… today Rodrick got grounded today because his mom found one of his dirty magazines. I was pretty sure Greg was to blame and turns out I was right, Rodrick texted me like ten minutes ago that Greg stole his stash and was holding them as black mail. But Rodrick managed to get him to give them back. So much for Greg’s plan I guess.

And now I’m just writing in here, sitting on the bathroom floor, naked in a towel. I just took a shower and I’m being too lazy to get dressed right now… I’m blasting some Metallica right now and damn they’re good. Too bad Löded Diper doesn’t sound like them. At least they got passion I guess.

Anyway… I guess I should stop being lazy and actually get dressed.

You slammed your diary shut, shaking out your cramped writing hand.

You stood up, not bothering to take the towel with you and just abandoning it on your bathroom floor along with your diary. You sang softly along to Master of Puppets playing in your bedroom, nodding your head along to the beat.

You shoved your bathroom door open, the music in your bedroom louder now as you swayed along to it.

You bounded over to your dresser, leaving damp foot prints in your carpet. You jumped over the blood stain on your rug. You had Rodrick to thank for that one after he cracked a bat over your head, thinking you were Greg instead… the entire week after that was a blur.

You pulled open your underwear drawer with the one good knob, the knob missing on the other side of the drawer was thanks to your brother crashing into your dresser one day.

You pulled out a pair and shimmied them up your legs as you continued to dance along with the music.

Now however, there was a full concert on blast in your head. It took you a while to find the discarded T-shirt you usually slept in, especially with the distraction of the music playing but eventually you found it rolled up in your comforter as usual. And finally as the song ended you pulled on the Löded Diper t-shirt Rodrick made for you.

However, what you saw quickly got rid of the good mood you were in. Because once your head popped through the hole, you made direct eye contact with Rodrick Heffley through your windows.

You forgot to close your fucking blinds.

He was in shock… you were in shock. His jaw hung open, eyes popping out of his head.

The next thing that happened you were sure the entire neighborhood heard as you and Rodrick both screamed at the top of your lungs. He ran straight out of his room and you ran straight for the blinds that you quickly shut.

Your best friend just saw you butt ass naked.

—

Extra:

Frank walked into his bedroom, ready to settle down for the night after a long night of painting his Civil War figurines.

As he began unbuttoning his button down, he had found his wife already in bed with a magazine in hand.

Everything seemed as usual… that was until he did a double take of the magazine in her hands.

”Uh… Honey?” He asked carefully, approaching her side of the bed. “Whatcha reading?”

“I found this in Rodrick’s backpack today,” she huffed, clearly still angry with her son.

”Okay… is there a reason you’re ‘reading’ it then?”

She looked up at her husband. “I was about to toss it out when I realized some of the pages were dog eared, so like any concerned mother I decided to take a look at what exactly my son is looking at so often that he has to dog ear it.”

”Right, yeah. Cause that’s… rational,” Frank spoke hesitantly.

”And look!” She opened one of the pages that were dog eared and showed Frank a two page spread of some naked woman. Frank quickly panicked and looked up at the ceiling.

“Uh huh?” He nodded.

”Frank, tell me who this girl looks like.”

Frank glanced back down carefully at the pages, before his eyes widened in realization. He yanked the magazine from her hands.

”She— That’s (Y/N)!” He realized in horror that his son was actively searching for naked women that looked like his best friend, whether or not he was aware of that, Frank didn’t know.

Suddenly saying it out loud sent a shiver down both their spines and Frank quickly shut the magazine. They both agreed that was enough for tonight.

But the vision of the mini Rodricks was becoming more and more vivid by the second.

#rodrick #rodrick heffley #rodrick x reader #rodrick heffley x reader #diary of a wimpy kid #diary of a wimpy kid fanfic #devon bostick #rodrick fanfic #rodrick rules #not my rodrick #rodrick fanfiction #rodrick Heffley fanfic #rodrick heffley fanfiction #loded diper

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may0tuna · 9 months

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I hate you more! Part 2 | Rodrick Heffley x Reader

Part 1, Part 3

Summary: Reader sabotages Rodrick's chances with Heather. A classic enemies to lovers!

Rodrick has been acting weird all day, and by weird, entirely quiet. You were worried he found out about your plan and was mad (even hurt) at what you did so you thought he was ignoring you on purpose. When lunchtime rolled around, you did not expect anything, more importantly, you did not expect Rodrick pushing through with asking Heather out. To your surprise, he still did, and it was indeed embarassing!

The cafeteria was chaotic with all the students sitting down and eating with their own cliques. You were sitting with Heather and the girls, and were talking about the upcoming English test by the end of the week, when all of a sudden you heard a high pitched noise as if someone was plugging something to the school sound system. You turned around to see Rodrick and his merry band of losers, the Loded Diper, setting up their music equipment. Your eyes lit up when you see Rodrick with a bunch of roses in one hand and a nervous look. Your gaze went from him to Heather, and a faint smirk appeared on your face.

Rodrick began on a not so great start because his microphone probably wasn't plugged in correctly, a screeching noise echoed throughout the entire cafeteria, gathering everyone's attention.

"Heather Hills," he began. Heather looked at him with fear as to what Rodrick will do or say next.

"Ever since we had Math class a few grades back, I knew," Rodrick had started walking towards our table.

"I knew that we," he stopped at our table, in front of Heather, handing her the roses, which Heather ignored so Rodrick decided to put it down the table.

"We were meant for each other," Rodrick breathed deeply and there was a pause. No one was sure if he was waiting for Heather to respond.

"1, 2, 3, 4, Ohh ohhh ohhh ohhh," then Rodrick started singing (badly) Justin Beiber's Baby.

"Are we an item? Girl, quit playin' (Yo, uh-huh) We're just friends, what are you sayin'? (Yo, uh-huh) Said, "There's another" and looked right in my eyes."

By this point, everyone was singing along with Rodrick despite his total lack of tune. Maybe they were singing because he was such a dork or maybe because they were making fun of him. Who knows? All you knew was that you were delighted when Heather, obviously furious, stormed out of the cafeteria. But just before she walked out the double doors, she passed by Rodrick and said, "As if! Loser!"

The entire cafeteria's laughter was deafening. A few grade schoolers, one of which was Rodrick's little brother, was laughing with his friend and everyone else. Rodrick seemed lost and his pained expression almost made you feel sorry for him. He looked over at you and you prepare yourself for a confrontation, but he didn't. He simply walked out of the cafeteria, leaving his band mates behind. Yup, that confirms it, you're the worst person in the world

First period after lunch, Rodrick was nowhere to be seen. Your teacher announced that he had to go home because he wasn't "feeling well." Yup, that made you feel worse about what you did.

Heather told you how embarassing it was and how he was a complete loser. You tried your best to defend him, but in Heather's case, it was indeed embarassing. Rodrick may be a good drummer but definitely not the best at singing. You said you had second-hand embarassment when he was singing, and Heather and the others laughed. This made you feel worse that you decided you're going to visit him and apologize after school.

You had declined Heather's offer to hangout after school, saying you have to study for the English test, which you will. But first, a peace offering, you were planning to buy him some kind of band shirt but there's no way you were gonna spend that much on him. Besides, he started it. This had all played out in your head, and you were trying to convince yourself that this was not your fault and that Rodrick started all of this. In the end and after much deliberation, you decided to buy him Red Bull from a convenience store because well, this was what you can afford.

Three firm knocks on the Heffley's residence door before Mrs. Heffley opened the door.

"Oh hello sweetie, may I help you?"

"Oh hello Mrs. Heffley, I'm Y/N. I'm one of Rodrick's classmates and also your new neighbor." You paused, not sure how to ask about Rodrick. "I was wondering if Rodrick is feeling any better?"

"Ahhh," she said inquisitively, as if she knows something? "Yes yes, the L/Ns, please come in."

You thanked her and stepped inside the Heffley residence. His younger brother, Greg, was in the living room playing video games and you waved at him as a form of greeting. You haven't been officially introduced but you were glad he waved back.

"So Rodrick is up in his room and would not come out since he got home a few hours ago," she paused before continuing. "Something about a stomach ache?"

"Rodrick's just mad because he embarassed himself in front of the whole school!" Greg shouted from the living room.

"Greg! That's not a nice thing to say!"

"But it's the truth, she was there," and Greg pointed at you. You tried to avoid their gazes and simply say, "It was an eventful day indeed, for everyone." You paused, for quite some time actually. "May I see Rodrick now?"

"Ah yes, go ahead upstairs."

"Thank you, Mrs. Heffley."

Rodrick's room was in the attic. You knocked a couple of times. The first few knocks, silence. The next few knocks, you heard him shout "Go away". You decided to not say anything because if he knew it was you, there was no chance in hell he would open the door. The next few knocks after that, you heard footsteps.

"Mom, I told you I'm not feeling-"

"Hi," you said timidly.

Rodrick slammed the door on your face. You rolled your eyes, this was not the first time he did that. You knocked again. Silence. You knocked a couple more times.

"What do you want?" He said from the other side of the door.

"I brought Red Bull."

"I don't want it." He said. You thought about what you were going to say next.

"Uhmm so have you studied for our English test this week?"

"What?"

"The English test. Have you studied yet?" By this time, the door creaked open, and Rodrick's head poked out.

"Is this a trick question?"

"No," you said firmly. How is this a trick question? Maybe you just lost his trust in every possible sense.

"Then, why did you ask me about a test when you have knowingly destroyed my life on purpose?!" He said as he swung the door open while walking up the stairs to his actual bedroom. Guessed this was your invitation to come in.

You closed the door behind you and walked up the few flight of stairs into his attic room. It was a typical guy's bedroom, messy and unorderly. You weren't sure where you were gonna sit down so you just stand there while he plopped himself on his bed, clothes everywhere.

"I'm sorry okay."

"Is this because of that time I slammed the door in your face?"

"Maybe."

"Wow!"

"I already said I'm sorry!" You were frustrated because you kept reminding yourself that he started this. Yes, it was a bit petty to embarass him in front of everyone at school because he had slammed the door in your face or that his band was being too loud on a Sunday morning, but majority of what happened was still his fault - or at least you tried to convince yourself that it was. It was his idea to sing in front of everyone with that voice. You sigh in defeat. You threw the Red Bull at him and it landed hard on his chest.

"Ow! What'd you do that for?"

"You deserved it," you murmur under your breath but Rodrick heard you.

"Listen here, little Miss Perfect..." Rodrick stood up walking towards you but just as he was to finish his sentence, both of you heard the door knob twist and footsteps walking up the stairs.

"Wazzup kids, what're yall talking about?" Mrs. Heffley said in her best attempt to speak what she thought was teenage "lingo".

"Hello Mrs. Heffley, we were just...talking about..."

"Our English test!" Rodrick finished your sentence.

"Ohhhh" Mrs. Heffley was surprised Rodrick would engage in anything academic.

"Yes, I was handing Rodrick some of my notes"

"Oh that's right, you won first place at the spelling bee in your previous school, right?"

"Oh yes," how the hell did she know that?

"I ran into your parents the other day at the supermarket. You know, it would be very helpful if you can tutor Rodrick with his English."

You and Rodrick both looked at each other.

"Oh no, I can't. I'm not that qualified."

"Yeah Mom, she's not. The spelling bee she won was probably just a fluke anyway."

"Rodrick, that's not nice!"

"No worries, Mrs. Heffley. What I meant by not qualified is that no one is. Rodrick is untutorable," you said as you pointed a finger at Rodrick to which he flicked.

"Yeah well, at least I don't spend my entire life trying to be someone I'm not just so that people will like me!" Rodrick responded by pointing a finger at you.

"Yeah well, at least I had won something in my life."

"A spelling bee? Please!"

"At least, I didn't made a fool of myself in front of the entire school because I was too dumb to realize something."

At this point, the intensity of the gazes between you and Rodrick would burn a whole in the moon.

"Alright alright, Y/N, it would be such a huge help if you can tutor Rodrick," Mrs. Heffley started to appeal to you but you had made up your mind, that is until...

"I'll pay you $100 a week!"

"What?! Pay me $100 a week to study instead!" Rodrick exclaimed.

"Well?"

Your trip to the Heffley's was not something you had expected, and how that trip ended was also not something you had expected. Guess any form of interaction with Rodrick will surely surprise you.

Now that you'll be seeing him a few days a week to tutor him, maybe you can use this time to regain his trust? If only he can stop being annoying and full of himself, maybe you guys will have a chance at a real friendship - but then again, all this banter makes it much more interesting.

#rodrick x y/n #rodrick heffley x reader #rodrick heffley x y/n #rodrick heffley x you #rodrick x reader #rodrick heffley fluff #rodrick rules #diary of a wimpy kid #I hate you more #loded diper

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