#my first attempt was so fucking bad. it was so fucking cringe i am still really mad at myself

[the-girl-who-didnt-smile]

This is a really bad little sketch, but I am working on redesigning this guy. It might take me a while, though.

#my first attempt was so fucking bad. it was so fucking cringe i am still really mad at myself #he's not where he needs to be but we're gettin somewhere #hazbin hotel ocs #the loa (hazbin hotel) #he is in fact supposed to look a bit like croco d. ile (one piece) #sir d. crocodile is like the most stylish man in all of one d. piece #he's got the most insane captain hook drip that i have ever seen and will ever see #i do not care that he dies to a navy seal with a hose. i'm making him my first mate! #also hopefully nobody reads this but if this man - this deviantart oc - was ftm transgender he would be the hottest man to ever #be a man. which is why i headcanon baron samedi (hazbin hotel) as ftm transgender!

[undermostcorgi]

the media which consumes your entire soul at age 12 will forever be a part of you. this is an unavoidable consequence of living and you have to accept this fact. no matter how old you get, no matter how long it has been since you last saw its smug face peeking out from the bushes as it follows you, no matter if you think you have outrun it for good and that you're finally finally safe and you hardly even remember it exists anymore and your brain knows a few brief moments of true peace, it WILL catch up to you in your moment of weakness. and listen you don't want to hear this but sometimes this is necessary for your mental health. you will on instinct want to reject it and run away again but sometimes. sometimes you just need to watch that old show or listen to that silly song or read that weird book again as an adult and it will hurt you a little bit in various little ways but it will also heal you a little bit. you can call it nostalgia you can call it connecting with your inner child or whatever you want but just listen to me it WILL HAPPEN TO YOU TOO AT SOME POINT AND YOU HAVE TO BE PREPARED FOR THIS (i am forcibly dragged off the stage by security)

#heed my warning boy #it seems i am not well today #recently made the reluctant decision to revisit what was probably my VERY FIRST real hyperfixation #something that i don't necessarily want to mention by name right now because. well #its pretty objectively bad LOL like i dont think i know of ANYONE still posting about it or really proud of having liked it back in the day #i dont think it is as well known to the general public so it wont get me hunted down for sport even if i did name it probably hopefully #but for those who know its. probably not the best thing to be revisiting lmao (even though i think it might still be being made?? wtf) #but i felt i had to because i was about to start my period and was going crazy insane like you do you know how it is #and i randomly remembered a fanfic i loved and then remembered my fav character and how much i loved him #my actual first ever blorbo oh my GOD he was everything to me #so i reluctantly decided to rewatch “just the first few episodes” just to see how much i remembered and also to prove to myself it sucks #but surprise surprise: nostalgia and hormones are making me actually kind of enjoy it #and now i am suffering from fucking Catholic-like Guilt for not hating it which i think is pretty silly lmao #so im kind of posting this in an attempt to convince myself that its like. FINE and cringe is dead and all that #and that sometimes i gotta be nice to my little mentally ill brain and give it the junk food (bad media) it craves #ESPECIALLY when im on my period LMAO #anyway completely unrelated: why the FUCK do i still remember almost every single fucking word to the delicious tomato song SDHJFKSAJF #i hope no one actually reads this far in the tags bc i know that reveal will probably deal psychological damage to some of you LMAO SORRYYY #ok yeah posting this and then immediately going to bed so that the Haters cant reach me LOL SEE YA

[thickest-slimiest-malware]

I lost a kahoot im being boiled alive

[sosappyjoos]

Ooooh, well since you love Yunho.

I'll guess I'll request a yunho smut please?

Yunho+praise+possessiveness

Thank you 🙏

Good Kisser-Jeong Yunho

↳Pairing : Jeong Yunho x f!reader

↳Warnings: MDNI! Seriously, dont! Smut, making out, brief mention of vomit (reader pukes on Yunho, but it's not mentioned too much), fingering (f. receiving), dick bulge, dom!Yunho, public sex, f!orgasm boss yunho, office romance, jealous and possessive Yunho, pet names (Sweatheart and baby), praise kink, Wooyoung and Yeosang are in the story but Y/N's friends and co-workers, mention of San. (pls let me know if there's anything else I should add)

Word count: 5,519

Summary: Reader gets drunk one night and talks bad about her boss Jeong Yunho, who ends up taking care of your drunk mistakes that night, including making out with him. But instead of being fired, you find that he's become rather possessive and a bit jealous about your interactions with some of your male co-workers.

Genre: enemies to lovers(?), office romance.

A/N: Aghhh this is my first ever fanfiction and actually my first time ever writing smut. This is unedited, so I'm sorry if there's any mistakes. But this was so much fun to write, and thank you @whatudowhennooneseesyou for the request. I hope you enjoy it. And maybe part 2?👀 Let me know if you want it. Also if people could please reblog this, that would be so helpful to help it get more attention and help me to continue writing amazing requests like this for everyone to enjoy. Anyways, enjoy!!

__________________________________________

“Fuck you, Wooyoung,” you cried out drunkenly. “Why did you introduce me to this damn job?”

“uh-huh I got it, I’m sorry,” Wooyoung tried calming you, looking around the busy restaurant apologetically.

“I work… I work over time every night, and I don’t even get to have a lunch break,” you raised your arms clumsily in exasperation, standing up from the frustration building in you. “And everyone” You started waving your arms, at the indication, slightly stumbling. “Piles their work on me since I’m the "newbie." Their work isn’t even my job, I’m a secretary. What am I? Some kind of intern? I'm not even that new! I've been working here for 8 months!" You pointed too yourself, eyes wide. "But you know what?!”

Wooyoung cringed, looking behind you, quickly tugging on your arms trying to get you to sit down. “I get it, I know. Now sit down before you fall.”

You thankfully cooperated. “The worst of them all is Jeong Yunho,” You attempted to say in a hushed tone, but it was still loud. “That bastard really gets on my nerves." You sighed, your bottom lip sticking out in a pathetic pout. "Yea, he’s my boss. But does he have to give me so much work to do?! I can’t even go on any dates because I don’t have time! It's his fault that I'm still single!” You cried. Wooyoung tried covering your mouth, but you quickly shoved his hand away, glaring at him. “He’s always so abrupt, and strict.”

“I understand. Just quiet down, huh?” Wooyoung continued trying to calm you, looking anxiously from you, to something over your shoulder. But you were so wasted you hardly even noticed how nervous he seemed.

“He hardly even talks to me, too! He just tells me what he needs with a few short words and then ignores my existence!" "Does he not realize I'm human? I'm a human being! It's so lonely sitting at my desk where no one but him is around," you whined. "He’s just a mindless working jerk!”

“Y/N, be quiet, huh?” Wooyoung now hissed through clenched teeth. 

“Ugh,” You quickly stood up again. “And stop looking behind me, it’s so annoying!” Standing up that quickly wasn't the wisest move you made that evening, as you quickly lost your balance and began to stumble backwards. Wooyoung’s face distorted to a face of shock as he stood up reaching for you. Your eyes widened and you let out a small yelp before feeling an arm wrap around your waist, stopping your descent to the ground. The realization was a bit slow for your drunken state, but you finally looked up at who had miraculously caught you. Your eyes narrowed and you quickly stood up as straight as you could, your feet still fumbling a bit, your heels clacking loudly against the floor. 

“Jeong Yunho!” You yelled at the man himself as he continued holding onto your arm, stabilizing you. He watched you carefully as you pointed your finger to his face. “You’re a fuckhead!” you giggled at the made up insult. Yunho’s eyes widened with shock at the nickname before chuckling to himself with a smirk on his lips. You slumped a little bit against him, suddenly tired. Yunho looked at Wooyoung, who was watching the scenario you had gotten yourself into with a cringe on his face.

“How much did she drink?” Yunho asked him.

“More than usual,” Wooyoung told him shrugging. “I guess the stress really got to her. What brings you here, Yunho?” Wooyoung asked, a slight smirk on his face. “Did you come because of my text?”

Yunho was silent for a moment. “Why did you both decide to drink on a week-day?”

“We weren’t here originally to drink. We were just eating,” Wooyoung sighed, leaning back in his seat. “But Y/N just kept drinking more and more. I’m sure you can guess why from overhearing her earlier?” He raised any eyebrow at Yunho, scanning his expression. Yunho pressed his lips together, swallowing. He avoided Wooyoung's eyes for a moment. Wooyoung stood up with a grunt before clapping his hand on Yunho's shoulder. “I have to get going now. The guys are wanting to go clubbing.”

“On a week-day?" Yunho asked. Wooyoung simply shrugged, giving a lazy salute with his two fingers. "Aren’t you going to take her home?" Yunho called after.

“That’s your problem now! See you later lover boy,” Wooyoung waved at Yunho and walked out of the restaurant. 

Yunho sighed, annoyed. He held you close to him, as he bent down grabbing your bag and jacket from your chair. He started to make his way to the exit when he was stopped by one of the staff. “Excuse me sir, but the meal over there still hasn’t been paid for.”

Yunho scoffed, and shook his head, knowing Wooyoung left the bill to him. “That little shit.” He mumbled, before quickly paying and walking out of the restaurant. The cold air bit at your exposed face and arms, making you whine. The sound was oddly rather sexual, making Yunho's cheeks warm in the cold weather. He cursed his mind for thinking such thoughts, looking up at the sky, trying his best to ignore any such thoughts. He pressed his lips together, before wrapping your jacket over your shoulders. You suddenly stood up straight, stumbling like an uneven bowling ball, singing a tune that Yunho didn't have a chance at recognizing with your offkey singing. He huffed a small laugh, holding your wrist to keep you out of the way of others and the street.

With some difficulty he guided you to his car, and you didn't make it any easier for him to help you inside. And once you were inside, of course that was when you fell asleep. Yunho let out an exhasperated sigh sitting in the drivers seat. He rested his hands on the steering wheel, looking over at you peacefully sleeping next to him. You had a small pout when you slept, and Yunho found himself smiling at how adorable he found it. He straightened up and stopped smiling as soon as he noticed though. He now debated on where to drive. He'd tried to get your address from you earlier, however that conversation wasn't exactly productive. He'd tried calling Wooyoung, but was sent straight to voicemail. He debated his options, before shifting the gear in his car. “My house it is, I guess,” Yunho mumbled. The drive was quiet, and thankfully, getting you out of his car was not nearly as difficult as getting you in. You had simply flopped over his back, making it easy for him to carry you into his apartment.

But when he was almost to his bedroom door, he horrifyingly heard a gag from you! He hurriedly opened his door, but before he could reach the bathroom, he felt an uncomfortable warm wetness over his shoulder, and a very unsatisfying "Bleugh" from you. You had vomited over his white button up, and he felt unbelievably uncomfortable, his shoulders slumping in defeat with a heavy sigh. This wasn't the kind of thing he'd been expecting on a Wednesday night.

He carried you into his bathroom, leaving you seated on his sink counter. You kicked your feet playfully as he got out a spare toothbrush he'd gotten from a dentist visit. He put some toothpaste on it, and coaxed you into opening your mouth. You cooperated giggling drunkenly. As he began to brush your teeth, you looked up at him with doe eyes. He was once again cursing his dirty mind, and tried his best to not imagine something very different from a toothbrush in your mouth. He closed his eyes a moment trying to reset his mind before he resumed helping you brush your teeth, quite thoroughly.

"This is ridiculous," he mumbled to himself. And he really felt that way, it was a simple task that you could probably do yourself, but here he was helping you brush your teeth, while you smiled obliviously. After your teeth were sufficiently cleaned, Yunho helped you down from the counter top, and guided you to his bed. You sat down, passively looking around at his room.

Yunho took the opportunity to gingerly take off his shirt, grabbing an oversized gray t-shirt. But before he could put it on, a pair of arms swiftly wrapped around his waist, pulling him back harshly. He fell back on his bed, a startled yelp managing to escape him. And there you were, hovering over him, your eyes seductive. You ran a hand through your hair, out of your face, letting it fall gently to the side of you.

“Y/N?”

You smiled, leaning down close to his face, your lips a breath away. His eyes widened, and he swiftly grabbed your arms sitting up, avoiding the impending kiss. You groaned at the sudden separation.

“Y/N calm down."

“I'm calm,” You smiled, your hands cupping his face. You leaned in to kiss him, this time too swift for him to stop you. His eyes remained wide for a moment, before easing into the kiss. The kiss was slow at first, your heart was beating quickly, and your cheeks felt even more flushed than usual because of the alcohol. Yunho gently held the back of your head as you wrapped your arms around his neck. His other hand held your waist and began to slowly trail up through your shirt, both of you pulling to deepen the kiss. You began to descend your hand down his chest, before reaching the bulge in his pants. You firmly palmed it, making him moan. However, the action brought Yunho back to reality as he realized the situation. 

Yunho pulled away from the kiss abruptly, shocked. You were also shocked but from the abrupt pause. He held your shoulders back as both of you breathed heavily from the make out session. His eyes sparkled as you looked at them, and seemed to hesitate before he avoided yours, distancing himself with you. You reached out for him again, but he caught your arms holding them away from him. “Y/N, you’re drunk.” He shut you down. Your eyebrows furrowed, a protest on the tip of your lips. But he stood up with a deep breath, still avoiding eye contact with you. “You can sleep here on my bed tonight. You have work tomorrow, so rest well.”

He swiftly left the room, and you simply stared at the door. Your head was fuzzy, and your eyelids felt heavy. After waiting a moment in case he returned, you finally laid back on the bed, hardly anything running through your drunk mind as you drifted off to sleep.

___________________________________________________________

You woke up the next morning to your alarm ringing which also triggered an excruciating headache. You groaned, reaching for your phone on your dresser, only there was no dresser as you reached. Your head popped up from your pillow, confused. You squinted around the room you were in, only to see it was not your room at all. You quickly sat up a gasp escaping you, your phone still ringing as flashbacks from the night before came into your mind full swing. Not only had you totally bad-mouthed your boss and he potentially heard it, but you also called him a childish insult right to his face. And to top it all off, you had made out with your “Fuckface” boss after puking on his shirt. You groaned mortified at yourself as you quickly stood to look for your phone, seeing it surprisingly neatly charging on the dresser, with a green sticky note on it. You shut off the blaring alarm, slightly relieving the mind splitting headache you were suffering from. Then you looked at the sticky note. 

“I set an alarm for you on your phone so you'd wake up in time. There’s some new clothes for you in the bag on the dining table along with some food to help with your hangover. You can take a shower if needed. and the toothbrush you used last night is still there, it's the purple one. I sent you where the closest subway station is too. Don’t be late -Fuckface”

You once again groaned seeing the horrid nickname you’d given him written at the bottom of the sticky note, crouching down. “I’m done for,” you chuckled in disbelief, letting yourself simply fall to the floor. “My career is over, my life is over-” you let yourself just whine, absolutely mortified. But remembering the warning against being late to work, you checked your phone, relieved to see that you had time to get in the shower as Yunho had said. You tried pushing your embarrassing night out of your head, so all that remained was your terrible hangover. You got up and walked into the kitchen to see some porridge and a glass of water on the table, along with the bag of clothes Yunho had left. You stared at the bowl of porridge for a moment before slumping down in the seat, eating it quickly. It was tasty, and you couldn't help but think about how thorough Yunho was even outside of work. After showering and getting dressed, and applying what little make-up you had in your purse, you hurriedly left the house. 

The subway station was really close which made things even less stressful for this morning. And even though you still had a bone to pick with Yunho, you were thankful for how easy he had made it for you this morning. It wasn’t like he was the worst boss out there of course. He was just… very very particular about his work, so much so that it didn’t seem like you could hardly do anything “right” according to him the first 3 months of working for him. You were shocked you hadn’t been fired before during that time as it truly seemed nothing was up to his standard. But finally you had gotten the hang of things a bit, and were able to do some things right. It was even more difficult when your co-workers kept giving you tasks that weren’t even for secretaries, let alone a personal one. They all treated you like an intern, and it felt insulting. But you clenched your teeth and did the work anyway, overworking yourself to the bone. 

You took a deep breath in front of your work building, mentally preparing yourself to go inside and face your boss. The same boss you'd most definitely offended, and most definitely kissed last night.

“Good morning,” a bright voice said behind you, and a skipping wooyoung stopped at your side, a giant grin on his face. 

“Good morning, my ass!” You scowled, glaring at Wooyoung. He inched away from you, a . “Why the hell did you leave me to Mr. Jeong, you asshole!”

“I had to leave!”

“But that’s my boss you left me with, drunk! Who I bad mouthed too!”

“Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” he pouted. 

You pressed your lips into a thin line, nodding a bit. “Well, I guess you could say something like that,” you mumbled. 

“Ladies first,” Wooyoung indicated for you to enter the building first. 

“Then I insist you be the one to go first,” you smiled sarcastically. Wooyoung squinted at you, before walking inside, you following close behind, your shoulders sagging in reluctance.

“So, what ended up happening last night?” You both stepped into the elevator

“I’d really rather not talk about it.”

“That bad huh?”

“No, it was worse than bad Wooyoung. All I’m going to say is don’t be surprised if I never come to work again after today,” you sighed, walking out of the elevator together. 

“You’re exaggerating,” Wooyoung squinted at you. 

“I wish I was! I really fucking wish I was.”

You approached your desk which was just outside of Yunho’s office. The lights seemed to still be off inside his office, meaning he still wasn’t there. You let out the hundredth sigh already today as you slumped down in your chair.

“It’s over,” you once again mumbled to yourself, remembering last night's events. The way Yunho's lips were so soft but strong against yours, and the way he held you so close to him. The way his fingers brushed against your skin.

You sat up abruptly though, shutting down those thoughts before your face turned bright red. "All I can do now is try to convince him to let me stay," you mumbled, straightening some papers you had on your desk.

And there he was right down the hall, Yunho's steady foot prints approaching your desk. You quickly stood up, ready to greet him. You bowed to him with a polite “Good morning Mr. Jeong,” as he passed by, opening the door to his office. You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, thankful he passed by so quickly.

“Ms. Y/N,” Yunho called, and your head snapped up to him. He was holding his door open. 

“Yes?”

“Come inside,” he simply said, walking into his office. 

“Yes…” you groaned, your shoulders slumped as you walked through his office door.

“Mr. Park wants to reschedule our upcoming meeting to the 27th, adjust my schedule to fit him in,” Yunho said nonchalantly, taking off his suit coat and resting it on his chair. 

“Ah, yes. I’ll quickly do that for you…” You said slowly. You furrowed your brows. 

“Oh, and be sure to remind team 1 we have a meeting today to talk about the upcoming project.”

“Of course,” you affirmed. You couldn’t help but feel a little bit confused. He’s acting the same as always. You stared in a bit of disbelief at him. He settled into his seat, opening a manila folder. He looked up at you, puzzled.

“You can leave now.”

“Ah, right.”

You quickly rushed out of his office and into your own space, looking at his calendar for the 27th. You shifted a few things around, but thankfully there wasn’t much scheduled that day yet. You also sent out a reminder to Team 1 about the meeting that would be held in an hour. After that you scanned your emails, thankful for the distraction. 45 minutes passed of productive work before you stood up, and began getting the meeting room ready, setting out water bottles, folders and snacks on the table for everyone.

“Y/N,” you heard Wooyoung call. You turned around to see him at the door, smiling as always. 

“What do you need this time?”

“I’m just setting up the presentation,” he shrugged, bringing his laptop in, and setting it up to the big screen at the front of the room. Wooyoung was the team leader of Team 1. You already knew by now that Yunho and Wooyoung were actually pretty close, but you didn’t mind. You’d known Wooyoung since high school, and you’d gone your separate ways after during college, and a few years after that you'd gotten back in contact. You were thankful he’d introduced you to such a big job, but Yunho’s constant corrections of every little thing, and abrupt demands and assumption that you knew what he was thinking 24/7 was still exhausting. The powerpoint was open at the ready. Wooyoung walked over to you, as you were restocking one of the snack baskets. He reached over to pick up one of the mini packages of almonds. “Can’t you bring better snacks than these?” You rolled your eyes, attempting to snatch it out of his hands, but he quickly lifted his arm so the snack was out of reach.

“These are fine. Besides, Mr. Jeong likes them right now,” you sighed, once again trying to reach for them. 

“Ah, your prince charming last night?”

You grunted, huffing the hair out of your face as you continued to reach for the snack. Wooyoung let out an annoying giggle which was only getting more and more on your nerves. 

“Ahem,” someone behind you interrupted. You stopped, spinning around to see Yunho, leaning against the glass door frame. He had an eyebrow lifted, and his jaw was slacked. He stared at us, unamused. 

“Oh Yunho!” Wooyoung greeted finally lowering his arm. You quickly snatched the snack out of his hands and bowed to Yunho. You then started filling the snack basket again, but you could feel Yunho’s eyes still on you.

“Is everything set up?” Yunho finally asked Wooyoung. 

“Yes, everyone should be here in just a minute.”

________________________________________________________

The meeting had started out fine, but Yunho quickly began analyzing the imperfections and holes in Team 1's product plan, seemingly extra irritable. Poor Wooyoung was a mess trying to reason with Yunho and keep up with his frequent “attacks.”

“Apparently he also woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” Wooyoung mumbled to you, packing up his laptop. 

Well, once again, it was something like that. You patted Wooyoung's shoulder encouragingly. “Come on, it wasn’t that bad,” you tried. “And it’s good he’s bringing attention to these things early on so it runs more smoothly when we finally start on the project,” you reasoned. 

“Y/N,” Yunho said sternly. He walked up to you and Wooyoung. “I need you to copy 70 of these and distribute them to all team members personally. After that I need you to plan and schedule the Breakfast Banquet in June. I expect it to be half-way finished by today. Oh, and I also need you to contact Mrs. Lim about the advertisement set-up, and have her change the place to somewhere more… exotic.” Yunho piled. You had gotten out your tablet halfway, frantically typing down everything he had told you, precisely. “Oh, and bring me some coffee and some lunch. Make sure it’s something refreshing.”

“Yes, I’ll start on everything right away,” you said, as he began walking away. 

“Ah, and if this is too abrupt and strict for you, then… so very sorry,” he gave you a sarcastic smile, before walking away

Your jaw dropped as you watched him leave. So this is about last night. You closed your mouth, letting out a scoff.

“You regretting what you said last night yet?” Wooyoung teased. You slammed the papers Yunho had handed you onto the table, and gave Wooyoung a scathing glare. Wooyoung took the hint and quickly left you seething.

______________________________________________________

The next day you came to work with very prominent dark circles under your eyes. The additional work Yunho had piled on you had proven to be very difficult and you left work way later than usual, absolutely drained. You were thankful it was now Friday, impatient for the weekend. 

“Woah! What happened to you?” Were Wooyoung's first words seeing your face at your desk. You glared at him. "You look like shit."

"Thanks for boasting my confidence there," you said in a monotone voice. “I worked overtime last night,”

Wooyoung pursed his lips. “Couldn’t be me. I went clubbing with some girls. Yeosang and San came with me,” he bragged. This only made you more annoyed. 

“Clubbing. On a weekday?” you let out an annoyed chuckle. “Wooyoung, you better get out of here in 3 seconds or I strangle you.”

Wooyoung gave another smile and quickly walked away from your desk. You sighed holding your temples. You heard Yunho step out of his office, and you quickly stood, bowing to him. He pursed his lips gradually approaching your desk. 

“The Breakfast Banquet planning looks good so far. You can slow down on the project now over the next few months. And Mrs. Lim called with the new location for the ad. It fits well,” Yunho told you awkwardly.

You gave your best smile. “Glad to hear it.”

He nodded, walking away slowly. 

“Glad to hear it,” You mumbled, mocking yourself. “More like that’s what I better hear!” Your phone pinged and you glanced down at the message. It was an announcement of a team dinner with team 1 that you were invited to. You smiled, excited for ending the evening the right way.

“Y/N!” You looked up and spotted one of the members of Team 2, Han Yoonjung approaching your desk, with a big smile. Your own smile faltered. Yoonjung was one of the main perpetrators of passing off her work to you. And she always made it practically impossible to say no to.

“Hi, Ms. Han,” you greeted politely. 

“Oh come on. Call me Yoonjung, I don’t mind,” she smiled. “Hey, so tonight my boyfriend made some plans to go out to dinner that I totally forgot about. Problem is I have a bit of a project that I need to finish before tomorrow. Would you be able to finish it for me?” she asked. 

You paused for a moment, already annoyed. “But I actually have a bit of plans tonight. There’s a team dinner.”

“Oh those are lame anyways. Always so stuffy and boring. I'd actually be doing you a favor helping you get out of it,” she dismissed. “Please?”

You hesitated on what to say, wanting to refuse more firmly while still being polite. You opened your mouth to speak, but someone spoke before you could. “She said she had plans tonight.” You looked at Yunho as he approached the both of you. 

“Oh, well I was just asking for a bit of a hand to help,” Yoonjung tried to excuse herself. 

“Doing a full project for another worker is hardly a bit of a helping hand. That's quite literally doing their job for them," Yunho explained. Yoonjung was about to speak again, but Yunho beat her to it. "I can’t say I’m impressed that you keep handing off your work to my personal secretary,” Yunho raised an eyebrow. Your stomach jumped. Yes! Help me out of this for once, please! I stayed here way too late last night for you not to stand up for me!

Yoonjung shrank down. “I was just asking since I wanted to go to dinner with my boyfriend and-”

“And I don’t see why Y/N would need to take responsibility for that,” Yunho interrupted, sternly. Yoonjung swallowed, her cheeks red. “I also know this isn’t the first time you or others have asked. Y/N is a personal assistant, not a crew member on one of your teams. Her job is very different, and important for me." Yunho said. His defense was giving you butterflies, which in a way felt pathetic, but you couldn't help but feel a little giddy. "Y/N doesn’t accept work from anyone else, unless it’s been pre-approved by me. I hope you spread this to your co-workers as well,” he told her in a firm yet gentle manner, making sure to stay professional. You looked down at the ground, swallowing a victorious smile. 

“Yes sir,” Yoonjung affirmed. Yunho gave her a short polite smile before she walked away. 

“Thank you, Mr. Jeong.”

“Of course. And it's true, you shouldn't be accepting work from others unless I approve, so don’t hesitate to call for me,” Yunho smiled. He then lifted his hand which held a coffee. “You seemed tired so I got you some coffee.”

You blinked in shock, and then finally grabbed the coffee. “Oh. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it,” he dismissed, walking away into his office. You held the back of your hand to your cheek, trying to cool it. You couldn’t help but smile as you sipped on the beverage, and sat back down at your desk.

_______________________________________________________

The restaurant was loud with all your co-workers from Team 1 talking and laughing. You were also thankful to be participating in the fun.

“You seem more energetic since Yunho’s additional tasks yesterday,” Yeosang said. He was sitting across from you taking a sip of the water in front of him.

“Oh. It wasn’t so bad,” you dismissed, taking a bite of food. 

“Yea right,” Wooyoung chuckled. “Your dark circles were practically sagging to our feet this morning.”

“Stop exaggerating,” You shoved him. It was true that it was a lot of work, however your mood about it had significantly improved after talking with Yunho. You felt a bit pathetic for feeling so happy over such simple things like him praising you, or defending you against co-workers shrugging their responsibilities on you. But it did make you happy, and you took the optimism gladly. Suddenly there was a rush of shocked conversation around you. You looked up and saw Yunho’s tall and lithe figure walking into the restaurant. Wooyoung and Yeosang waved him over and he approached the three of you. He sat down next to you smiling. He looks so cute. You thought. You may have not always been a fan of Yunho, but you weren’t a liar. He was obviously a very attractive man. So attractive it was sometimes hard to be mad at him. You made eye contact with him and your stares lingered for a moment, before you both looked away. You chewed the inside of your cheek, unsure what to do with yourself now. 

“You made time to come. We’re glad to see you,” Yeosang clapped Yunho’s shoulder.

“I thought it wouldn’t hurt if I came,” Yunho shrugged, taking a drink.

Everyone was enjoying their time eating, drinking and talking. As Yunho, Wooyoung and Yeosang talked and goofed off, you couldn't help but smile along. You were getting a bit tipsy, and decided to dismiss yourself to the bathroom real quickly. You stared at yourself in the mirror, pinching your cheeks a bit trying to remain as sober as you possibly could. Your cheeks were already a bit flushed, and the pinching didn’t help at all, but you couldn't get drunk tonight. Not after that fiasco a few days ago.

You walked out of the bathroom, and there Yunho was leaning against the opposite wall. He walked up to you, a shy look on his face.

  “Listen,” he starts, chewing the inside of his cheek. “I’m sorry for piling all that work on you. I understand it was a lot, and it was petty of me to get back at you.”

You sucked at your teeth taking in his apology. “Don’t worry about it. I’d have to work on all of it eventually, so it was a good head start. Besides, I said some pretty terrible things about you.”

“Guess we’re even now,” Yunho said. 

“Well actually, about that other night-” You started, but Yunho shifted uncomfortably and interrupted you.

“I think we should get back to everyone, don’t you think? Wooyoung and Yeosang will definitely eat all of the meat if we're not there.”

“Oh. I guess so.”

You both started walking back to the group, but before you could be in view of the others Yunho leaned down trapping your head behind a busy booth, whispering in your ear. “You’re a good kisser though.”

Your cheeks flushed and your heart was throbbing as you both sat down. Yunho hid a smile as he sipped on his drink.

“Y/N, were you able to get that guy's number last weekend? I left before seeing you actually do it,” Yeosang asked. You sank down in your seat, embarrassed for some reason.

“No… He left before I could ask,” I said shyly. 

“Come on, you hardly go clubbing with us and you missed this one opportunity to get a guy's number,” Wooyoung whined. “Why don’t you come clubbing with us again this weekend?”

You glanced over at Yunho, his tongue was in his cheek, and nose slightly flared. “I think I’ll actually pass,” you said.

“Then should I be the one to get your number and show you a fun time?” Wooyoung teased.

You fake gagged. “Wooyoung that’s just not right,” you said. 

“You’re right,” he shivered at the idea. 

Yunho quickly stood up now, swinging his suit jacket over his shoulder. “I have to get going now. Wooyoung, make sure to use the business card.” He quickly walked out of the restaurant. You frowned at his abrupt departure, you'd slightly been hoping to talk more.

“What was that about?m He looked pissed.” Yeosang mumbled. Wooyoung and Yeosang dove back into conversation, while you were lost in thought. What did Yunho mean exactly, by being a good kisser? Why would he say that to you? Was he wanting to forget that night, or remember? You couldn't tell what he was hoping to achieve by complimenting your kissing skills, and it was killing you.

Your phone pinged, dragging you out of your thoughts. The message was from Yunho.

I’m down the street by the bus station. Meet me there in 5 minutes. 

Your heart leaped and you quickly exited the message so Wooyoung’s nosy ass wouldn’t see. You waited for a moment, before standing up with your bag and pulling your long coat on. “Hey I have to get going now. I’ll talk to you guys laterm though.”

Both Wooyoung and Yeosang protested as you left, but you simply waved and walked out the door. You pulled your jacket closer around you, your hairs rising from the bitter cold. You walked at a quick pace to the bus station Yunho had mentioned. You didn’t understand exactly why you felt so giddy. He probably forgot to give you some business file, but for some reason the thought of seeing him in private made your stomach feel jumbled, especially after he had suddenly complimented your kissing skills earlier.

 You arrived at the bus station and looked around. There was an older man, drunkenly sleeping on the bench, but Yunho was nowhere in sight. You felt the giddiness start to dissipate and your shoulders started to slump when you suddenly felt a hand grab your wrist. You turned and saw Yunho quickly pulling you to a dark small alleyway making the giddy feeling come back full swing.

He pushed you against the brick wall, arms holding the wall on both sides of your head. He stared at you for a moment. His eyes sparkling from what little light there was around, but his eyebrows were still raised with an air of sternness. You were breathing heavily, your heart beating quickly from the unexpected turn of events. Finally he leaned down to you, kissing your lips with vigor. You kissed him back matching his intensity. He held your head, and tilted into the kiss, deepening it, now holding your waist with his other hand, pulling you closer to him. The wetness in your panties was inevitable at this point, especially as he placed his leg between yours. He broke away from the kiss, and you briefly worried he would stop like he had last time you’d made out. Instead he spoke in a hushed tone.

“I thought I gave you so much work you didn’t have time to date? You were going to give your number to some guy at the club?” He then started to kiss down your neck, the hand at your head now traveling down your leg. 

“I thought of it, but decided not to after remembering how much I wouldn’t have time for him,” you breathed out.

“Ah, is that why you decided to flirt with Wooyoung instead?” Yunho nibbled at your collar bone.

“Wooyoung and I don’t flirt. He’s basically a brother to me,” You sighed, biting your lip. Yunho moved his hand to the inside of your thigh, traveling up your skirt. You got a run of shivers from his touch along with the cold. 

“And?” Yunho asked, his lips once again at your neck. His long fingers were now brushing the hem of your panties. 

“And I’d never date him,” you told him.

“Good girl,” Yunho said, finally placing his hand over your clothed pussy. He could feel how wet you were, soaking through your panties. He stopped kissing your neck and looked at you now, smirking. “You’re so wet for me, sweetheart,” he hummed. You let out a shaky breath, trying your best not to moan. You gripped onto his arm as his two fingers pushed aside your panties, smoothing over your slickness. “Were you wet like this the last time we made out?” he asked.

You couldn’t even respond, just desperate for his deeper touch. Your eyebrows were furrowed and you closed your eyes, trying to enhance what you were feeling from his fingers. “Your little pout is so pretty, baby. Do you want more?” he asked. You only nodded. You could hear him breathe out a chuckle as he slipped his two fingers inside you. He let them slowly reach up, and slowly pulled them out once more, making you almost moan, but you quickly covered your mouth, choking back the demonstration of pleasure. 

Finally he began to slowly pump his fingers inside you, trying to subtly find your g-spot. Finally, his fingers reached it, and you trembled a little bit, letting out a small whimper. Yunho gave a sly smile. “Found it.” Now that he found it, he was intent on using it as much as he could. As he massaged your g-spot he used his thumb to rub your clit. You were trying so hard not to moan with every pump now, and could only let out small quiet whimpers now. “You’re staying so quiet for me baby, you’re doing so well,” Yunho now whispered in your ear.

“It feels so good,” you whispered back. 

“Better than wooyoung, or that guy could ever make you feel, right?” He asked. You only nodded now, unable to speak. There was tension building up in your stomach, and you held tight onto Yunho’s wrist, feeling your orgasm on its way. “You got it sweetheart. Cum nice and sweet for me.” he encouraged, feeling you start to clench around his fingers. Your relief was hanging on by a string as he fingered you even more rigorously, and he rubbed your clit even harder and faster. Finally your breath hitched as that string finally snapped, and your body shook a moment from the intense orgasm. You barely stifled your moan, but your legs started to lose strength. Thankfully Yunho held you up with strong arms. “You did so well,” he whispered, kissing your forehead. 

“Hey, we should all go for a second round!” You heard Wooyoung's voice approaching from down the street. You quickly looked at Yunho, frightened to be seen in this state. Thankfully he understood your look. The sad part was his fingers leaving your insides, as he used his other hand to spin you away from the outside view of the alleyway. His tall figure blocked you completely from outside view. 

“Haven’t you had enough to drink?” You heard Yeosang reason, very nearby now. Yunho’s head tilted, listening intently. You could see the group's shadow begin passing by in random conversation. 

Yunho gave you a seductive glance, sticking his two fingers which were inside you inside his mouth, sucking. You stared at him, turned on once again. He took the fingers out of his mouth leaning down to you. “You really did cum nice and sweet for me,” he whispered after the group had passed. 

You rolled your eyes, an inevitable smile on your lips. You stood on your tippy toes, giving him a kiss, which he gladly accepted. You broke the kiss, and he looked at you curious. “Am I really that good of a kisser though?”

#ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez smut #ateez #ateez yunho #jeong yunho #yunho x you #yunho smut #jeong yunho x reader #yunho x y/n #yunho x reader #ateez yunho smut #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction #kpop smut #fanfic #fanfic request #praise #possessive #office romance #smut fanfiction #au fanfiction

[bensonsbobblehead]

The Village it Takes 

pairings; Spencer Reid x Mom!reader (ft Daughter!oc)

Spencer fakes his death ( basically how Emily did) leaving you and your 11 year old daughter behind.

Content Warnings; angst, sadness, talks of death and grief.

a/n; Hiii, I am working on a taglist and how to make one for the future im so sorry im still fairly new to this.

wc; 1.0k [ first ]

Spencer was always better with her, you were her best friend but Spencer was her diary. He encouraged her to do things he knew he would never be able to do. She was so outgoing, thanks to you, even though he was shy Ronnie brought out another part of him. After he died everything changed for the household. It was harder for Ronnie to adjust specially as she’s approaching womanhood.  

The two of you had argued almost everyday just for it to end with her breaking down in the end. You knew this was just her way of dealing with her father being taken from her. That didn’t make it any better for you though. Seeing Cameron like this was the hardest thing ever.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so mean mom.” She spoke after two hours of silently watching tv, “I just miss dad so much I want to scream. Some days it hurts to breathe and it makes me so angry. I miss him” she said randomly as you both watch tv together.

Thirteen was suppose to be a fun age where you begin to learn who you are or could be. Camerons chance was taking from her now she’s consumed with this grief. The same grief you were dealing with in your own way. It hurt you so much he was missing his beautiful creation grow up. 

You pushed her glasses up off the bridge of her nose, “I know its so hard, I miss him so much it hurts to breathe but I have you and you have me, this is how we get through it.” Kissing her on the temple.

You pulled you daughter into your side rocking her until she fell asleep. You were both abruptly awoken by the sound of your phone ringing. A call from Aaron Hotchner, which wasnt rare but why was he calling so late? He said in a few words that you needed to head to the BAU. 

You gathered your things wondering what in the world this could be about. You held Ronnie’s hand as you headed up to the office. Your heart was ponding reminding you of the last time you were here. You had came to clear out Spencer’s desk and collect his badge. You remembered it like it was yesterday. All the sad eyes watching you attempt to pick up the pieces of what was abruptly left behind. 

“Do you think something bad happened again?” She asked squeezing your hand harder. 

“I’m not sure Rons” you tried to reassures her also wondering the same thing. You all were led to the bullpen with Cameron opting to sit at her dads old desk. The room was filled with your husband family, Jennifer, Aaron, Emily, Penelope, Rossi, and Luke.

“As you all know Dr.Spencer Reid was pronounced dead three years ago.” Confusion spread across everyone’s face and Aaron continued, “Three years ago I made a decision to keep the identity of Dr. Reid and I take full responsibility.” 

“What do you mean keep the identity of him a secret?” You asked still completely confused, 

“Mr.Scratchs son was caught and killed by the fbi a few hours ago. Three years ago he couldn’t know Spencer was still alive and neither could any of you. Once again I say I take full responsibility” Your face cringing at the name of the man who caused you and your family so much pain. 

Then it hit you Spencer was still alive?

“Aaron what are you fucking saying to me? That my husband is alive?” If this was true all those days spent talking to his grave meant nothing. The picnics or visits to the grave after Ronnies competitions were nothing. Spencer was walking this earth while you were here going through the worse pain in your life. Asking with glassy eyes, you were pulled out of your thoughts by Penelope head snapping toward the door. 

“Oh my God” she said with tears falling from her blue eyes. 

There he was Spencer Reid, the love of your life, the man that made you a mother, he’s alive after three years. He stood tall and a bit bigger with his long curly hair. 

“Y/N I’m sorry, all of you really.” He walked in giving hugs to everyone in the room. You hadn’t even moved, you didn’t know rather to be happy or angry at him. For never saying anything for letting you believe he was gone. 

“Y/N, can — can I hug you?” He asked sincerely not wanting to startle you. Before you could even think your hand was moving to slap him across the face, your angry completely took over. 

“THREE YEARS SPENCER?!?, you left me and your own DAUGHTER and still slept at night?” You yelled causing the entire room to become silent. Spencer stood there with no response which only made you more upset. 

“Say something! Say why you did? Just fucking give me a reason to put us through this” you were hitting him in the chest causing Hotch to grab you. 

“YOU don’t fucking touch me!” You snapped toward him, the man that watched you break down silently after putting your daughter to bed every night. Aaron had been there for you and Cameron since he “died”.

Jack and Cameron were always friends before her dad passed and were even closer as time went on. Most of the time having Ron distracted helped you deal with your grief with Aaron by your side, he was one of your husband’s closest friends.

“Daddy?” You heard Ronnie’s voice from the door, you completely forgot you even brought her. 

Everyone turned toward the teenage who stood tall just like her father. She was even wear their matching converse they decorated together. Spencer turned taking in his daughter, immediately regretting everything . She grew so tall and looked so mature, he missed it all. 

“Cameron I’m so sorry honey, I never meant to hurt you sweetie” he didn’t move allowing her to feel whatever emotion she needed. Her eyes filled with tear with a small weep escaping her lips. Her breathing became uneven, she was gasping for air. 

“Dad? You’re alive?” She asked grabbing her stomach looking for some sort of comfort.

“Yes, I’m here sweetie.” Spencer said walking toward Cameron causing her to step back while shaking her head.

“No, No, I—-I, Mama I can’t —-” she said falling to the floor, gasping for air. you pushed pass Spencer immediately hoping into mom mode. Spencer stood still unsure of what to do to help his own daughter. His heart shattering seeing the pain all of this has caused.

“Im right here baby, just keep following my breathing.” You told her as you sat on the floor with her, Emily coming to sit with her too. 

“In and out” you guided her as her breathing evened out, “I’m right here with you love” you pulled her into a bear hug while looking back at Spencer.

You all got up from the floor as you headed toward the elevator with your daughter not saying a word to Spencer as he silently followed behind.

#bau x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid angst #spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds #spencer reid dad #spencer reid x single!mom reader #Spencer Reid x daughter #Spencer Reid x daughter!oc #Reid daughter #spencer reid x mom!reader #Spencer Reid x mom #criminal minds angst

[r3dkn0ts]

I wanted to start something on my own ( the ask box is open pls send requests I am bored ) and got inspired reading some prompts, so here's the DBD Killers' reactions to getting horribly flirted with! Including some of my own pick-up lines because I'm bad at flirting

Badly Flirting with The DBD Killers: Part 1 Featuring Evan MacMillan, Philip Ojomo, and Max Thompson Jr.

Themes: GN!Reader being cringe, an attempt at comedy, slight fluff, and implied smut Warnings: Canon-typical violence

The Trapper / Evan MacMillan - You got cornered while injured with no other survivors nearby. Shit. Might as well give it a shot, right? - "Hey, are you a hundred dollar bill on the ground? Because I'd pick you up and spend every bit of you immediately." - Your voice was wavering as you said it, even though you tried to look as nonchalant as possible. - Evan's loud puffing behind his mask made the silence even more deafening. Was he gonna mori you now? Probably. - "Nice try", was the only thing he said in his rough accent before swiftly downing you and putting you on a sacrificial hook. - He definitely wasn't going to admit that your pick-up line made him chuckle a bit inside of his head, or that it made you look cute. - He couldn't stop thinking about that for a while.

The Wraith / Philip Ojomo - Trapped in a corner in the garage at Gas Heaven, your friend Ace had dared you to finally confront The Wraith about how you felt the next time you met him in a trial, even supplying you with a pick-up line. - You certainly weren't one to back down from a challenge! This was stupid. - "Are you a fine wine? Because I'd love to taste you." - Philip stared down at you blankly, darting his stark white eyes between the concrete floor and your face. - Had you actually flustered him? Body language was all you really had to go off of, and the fingers on his right hand were twitching. - Before you knew it, he rang his bell to cloak and darted out of the building, leaving you alone in the cold garage. - Did you offend him? What if he's already in a relationship? Ah fuck, you didn't think of that. - You didn't know it, but he watched you run out of the exit gate, cloaked. You didn't even see him for the rest of the trial. He was too embarrassed to face you any time soon. - Much to his surprise, that was the first time he had ever gotten physically aroused after being taken into the fog. He had business to take care of after you left.

The Hillbilly / Max Thompson Jr. - The three other survivors were sacrificed. You thought you were about to get chainsawed in half, but he stopped revving when you looked like you were about to say something to him. He was curious. - "Hey, if you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber!" - Your comment made him tilt his head to the side like a confused puppy and lower his chainsaw. Did you just compliment him? Why? - His second assumption was that someone had dared you to compliment him as a joke. He was always the butt of the joke, so why would anyone actually compliment him? He's hideous! - You noticed him getting caught up in his head, so you took a chance and gently placed a hand on the deformed flesh of his arm. He flinched a bit and looked back down at you. - "Are you okay? I really did mean that. I think you're cute." - Max simply stared at you in silence. He was really, really confused. Were you serious? You sounded serious. - He looked back down at the hand you still had on his arm. You went to take it back, scared he was angry, but he grabbed your wrist as you did and pulled your smaller hand into his. - For a moment, he just looked at your hand. Your skin felt so nice against his. He had never felt someone touch him unless it was meant to hurt him. He liked this new feeling. - For once, Max felt himself smiling. He knew he had to let you go, though. So he let you leave through the hatch after you promised him you'd visit him later.

#dead by daylight x reader #dead by daylight imagines #the trapper x reader #evan macmillan x reader #the wraith x reader #philip ojomo x reader #the hillbilly x reader #max thompson jr x reader #fluff #smut #imagines #gender neutral reader #lgbt reader

[matthias-the-tulip]

my updated list of parts i hope they keep in the red, white & royal blue movie

(updated after i reread it in a day) (a lot of these are just funny lines that add absolutely nothing to the plot but they make me laugh)

• the MAGAZINE 😭

• “he has the personality of a cabbage.”

• “i want to hear you gush like he's your fucking prom date.”

• alex makes a long loud fart noise


• “i'm going to throw up on you” at the stables (doesn't look like they're at a stables in the trailer 😒)

• “i'd rather be waterboarded” also at the stables (again, doesn't look like they're at a stables)

• “i bet he has a secret lovechild,” nora says. “or he's gay. or he has a secret gay lovechild.”

“it's probably in case i see his equerry putting his batteries back in,” alex says.

• midnight ice cream on instagram

• “i didn't know you wore glasses.” (henry's wearing a suit not pyjamas and alex is not wearing glasses what's that all about!)

• awkward fist bump on “this morning” (does not look like it’s a chat show in the trailer but also would a royal even go on this morning)

• star wars stan henry 🥹

• “not impressed, just surprised.”

“at what?”

“that you actually have, you know, feelings.”

• henry is beginning to smile…

• “do you MIND?” in the cupboard at the hospital

• “you're not the prince of me” 😭

• “i'd rather not be the little spoon.”

• henry's feet in a mop bucket

• “locked in a cupboard with your elbow inside my rib cage.”

• “i cannot believe even mortal peril will not prevent you from being the way you are.”

• “are you psychoanalysing me? i don't think royal guests are allowed to do that.”

• “is that the time you threatened to push me into the thames?”

• “no booty calls.”

• “it was like you were trying to set him on fire with your mind.”

• june's (nora now i guess 😟) plot to murder woody allen

• “don't let the papers print lies about me after i've garroted myself with my tie.”

• “you are the thistle in the tender and sensitive arse crack of my life.”

• “yes, famously the most sinister of all animal sounds, the gobble.”

• “cornbread knows my sins.”

• the whole turkey situation really

• “buy a summer home in majorca with the turkey”

• MR WOBBLES

• “jabba” cakes.

• henry watching bake off

• “you're jeff goldblum”

• “yo there's a bond marathon on and did you know your dad was a total babe”.

“I BEG YOU TO NOT”

• “it sounds like you did your best.” 🥹

• the new year’s party being referred to as “the legendary balls-out bananas white house trio new year's eve party” (white house duo now 😭)

• “please do not attempt to steal my shine. you will fail and i will be embarrassed for you.”

• “says prince fucking charming.”

• get low playing at the new year’s eve party

• alex’s reaction to get low playing at the new year’s eve party

• “christ, you are as thick as it gets.”

• alex falling while running with june (nora now i guess 😟) cause he was thinking about henry

• “he's gay and you're hot, so.”

• “still waters, deep dicking.”

• “prince henry is a biscuit,” nora says,
“let him sop you up.”

• they know each other's sleep schedule and alex gets in a bad mood when he doesn't talk to him 🥹

• “you're not going to kill him, are you?” she says.
“probably not,” alex tells her

• “shut up, shut all the way up, oh my
god”

• alex pushing henry up against a wall!

• “i mean, er, should we, i dunno, slow down?”henry says, cringing so hard at himself that one eye closes. “go for dinner first, or-“

• hooking one knee around the back of alex's thigh 😉

• ”i'm going to die,” henry says helplessly.

“i'm going to kill you,” alex tells him.

“yes, you are,” henry agrees.

• alex fixing his hair for him 😢😢😢

• henry singing god save the queen (king i guess) to make his 🍆 go away

• “i am going to do very bad things to you, and if you fucking ghost me again, i’m going to get you put on a fucking no-fly list. got it?”

• “you were jealous,” alex says. “you want me.”

• henry calling alex bossy 😂

• alex literally just insulting henry while he’s going to town on him

• “do you ever stop talking?” henry says. “such a mouth on you.”

• “hi,” he says, when he reaches henry’s eye level.

“hello,” henry says back.

“i’m gonna take your pants off now,” alex tells him.

“yes, good, carry on.”

• fucking eyelashes

• when he's done, he presses a sticky kiss in the crease of alex's leg where he'd slung it over his shoulder

• the mattress shifts, and henry moves up to the pillows, nuzzling his face into the hollow of alex's throat. alex makes a vague noise of approval, and his arms fumble around henry's waist, but he's helpless to do much else.

• the tip of henry’s nose catching on alex’s

• “for fuck’s sake, man, you just had my dick in your mouth, you can kiss me goodnight.”

• monocles for babies 😂

• “i don’t like that look,” amy says. “you look…sweaty.”

• “what in the rich-white-people-sex-dungeon hell?”

• the whole polo kit situation. henry slowly putting his boot back on the floor

• “i’ve thrown men in the dungeons for less.”

“hey, don’t threaten me with a good time.”

• paris!!! leaving directions to the cheese

• “you're a mad, spiteful, unmitigated demon, and I'm going to kiss you until you forget how to talk.”

• birthday floggings et al and the buttercream!

• alex’s heart going weird at henry on the boat and having to put his head in his hands

• “i don't give a damn what joanne has to say, remus john lupin is gay as the day is long, and i won't hear a word against it.”

• “i will staple your dick to the inside of your leg”

• “i did get both of the gay kings.”

• “deflowering the darling of the republic.”

• “i'm not ... historically great at talking about things,” henry says.

“well, i wasn't historically great at blowjobs, but we all gotta learn and grow, sweetheart.”

“wasn't?"

“hey,” alex huffs. “are you trying to say i'm still not good at them?”

“no, no, i wouldn't dream of it,” henry says, and alex can hear the small smile in his voice. “it was just the first one that was.. well. it was enthusiastic, at least.”

“i don't remember you complaining…”

“yes, well, i'd only been fantasizing about it for ages.”

• baby. (!!!)

• “i miss you,” alex says before he can stop himself. he instantly regrets it, but henry says, “i miss you too.”

• “i want to ... put my fingers in his mouth...” she moans, sounding horrified.

• just the whole karaoke bar situation. plz. toilet stall hookup!

• “bisexuality is truly a rich and complex tapestry.”

• o captain, my captain

• “if only you had known the mighty work of thine loins would be undone by a gay heir who likes it when american boys with chin dimples are mean to him.”

• the fruity truth: my favourite english author is jane austen.

• “when at wimbledon”

• “i want to see a cage match between your grandmother (grandfather i guess) and this fucking ghoul running against my mom”

• “and you are good. most things are awful most of the time, but you're good.”

• “he is truly a picture, wearing an expression of bewildered panic and absolutely nothing else.”

• “jesus tits”

• henry falling out of the wardrobe and just. sitting on the floor. (zahra finds him in the wardrobe instead :()

• “i thought you were getting into international relations or something.”

“i mean, technically-“

• “you're literally putting your dick in the leader of a foreign state, who is a man, at the biggest political event before the election, in a hotel full of reporters, in a city full of cameras, in a race close enough to fucking hinge on some bullshit like this, like a manifestation of my fucking stress dreams, and you're asking me not to tell the president about it?”

• all of zahra's quips tbh - “every time i see you, it takes another year off my life.” - “ask me if i'm afraid of the crown.”

• SEXUAL EXPERIMENTATION WITH
FOREIGN MONARCHS: A GRAY AREA.

• EXPLORING YOUR SEXUALITY: HEALTHY, BUT DOES IT HAVE TO BE WITH THE PRINCE OF ENGLAND?

• FEDERAL FUNDING, TRAVEL EXPENSES, BOOTY CALLS, AND YOU

• history, huh? bet we could make some. (the emails plz like i need at least some of them read aloud over a montage or something)

• “some saucy tart once tried to impugn my virtue against an oil painting of him, and in the halls of memory, some things demand context.”

• I GUESS THAT MAKES YOU. THE MF. NORTH STAR.

• “i thought you might need to, like, have a catholic moment about this or something?” 😭

• “santa maria is watching!”

• skinny dipping!!!

• “philip is the heir and i'm the spare, and if that nervy bastard has a heart attack at thirty-five and i've got malaria, whither the spare?”

• alex's meltdown outside kensington. very important. - “how 'bout i just keep yelling and we see which of the papers show up first!” he turns back to the window and starts flailing his arms too. “henry! your royal fucking highness!”

• “jesus, could you stop being an obtuse fucking asshole for, like, twenty seconds?”

• “i fucking love you, okay?” alex half yells, finally, irreversibly.

• “what do you want?”

“i want you-”

“then fucking have me.”

“-but i don’t want this.”

• “a whole lifetime of fine. that’s not good enough for me.”

• henry nuzzling his nose behind alex's ear.

• alex laughs and grabs his head and aggressively kisses his cheek, smashing his face into the pillow.

• “next time we shall visit some of the george Ill pieces and see if they burst into flame.”

• DANCING TO YOUR SONG IN THE MUSEUM

• “i completely fucking love you” and the ring and the chain

• “once shaan managed to dislodge him from the chandelier”

• henry’s email about memories and grief and the first time he saw alex

• “jesus, be a gay beard”

• henry and alex in the car after the fake date

• “i will physically fight your grandmother (grandfather i guess) myself if i have to, okay? and, like, she's (he’s) old. i know i can take her (him).”

“i wouldn't be so cocky,” henry says with a small laugh. “she's (he’s)full of dark surprises.”

• “your spine's a ridge i'd die climbing”

• “check the fucking news, you horny little miscreant”

• “it’s about to be gay DEFCON five in this administration.”

• “then fuck it.”

• the big group hug

• oscar saying “give ‘em hell.”

• “you're my mean friend.”

• “jumping off cliffs is kinda my thing”

• I 😭 LOVE 😭 HIM 😭 ON 😭PURPOSE 😭 they can't leave that out if they do i'll kill someone

• “what are we even defending here, philip? what kind of legacy? what kind of family, that says, we'll take the murder, we'll take the raping and pillaging and the colonizing, we'll scrub it up nice and neat in a museum, but oh no, you're a bloody poof? that's beyond our sense of decorum! i've bloody well had it. i've sat about long enough letting you and gran and the weight of the damned world keep me pinned, and i'm finished. i don't care. you can take your legacy and your decorum and you can shove it up your fucking arse, philip. i'm done.”

• “for what it's worth,” he says to philip, “that is the bravest son of a bitch i’ve ever met.”

• “we banged it out last night” + high five

• “i've been gay as a maypole since the day i came out of mum, philip.”

• all the support for them 🥹

• bea pouring the tea on philip's lap

• “you know, i think all that cocaine i did must’ve really done a job on my reflexes!”

• henry pulls alex close and kisses him, whispers, "i love you i love you i love you."

• never 😭 tell 😭 me 😭 the 😭 odds 😭

• “my life is a cosmic joke and you're not a real person”

• “you are the absolute worst idea i’ve ever had”

• “listen, you've had your first big sex scandal. no more sitting at the kids' table.”

• how to love each other in plain sight

• “holding henry’s hand atop his own knee” in the portrait

• “all this fundraising for sobriety is going to drive me to drink”

• “i'm the prince of...here” 😭

• “you spent a month of your gap year talking to yaks in mongolia, h.”

• “i know it's a lot, but you give people hope. so, get back out there and be alex.”

• the super six 😭 (fantastic five now i guess)

• the picture of them on the cover of the magazine

• henry fixing june's hair 🥹 (NORA NOW I GUESS 😟)

#rwrb #rwrb movie #red white and royal blue #red white and royal blue movie #red white & royal blue #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #casey mcquiston

[aleksanderscult]

My unpopular opinion for today? The Darkling was terrible at manipulating people

And that mostly comes from the author's incompetence on the matter.

Back in 2016-2017 on Tumblr she was asked which SoC character finds difficult to write and she replied "Kaz. Because he's clever and cunning".

So for her, writing manipulative characters is difficult and actually explains the reason why the Darkling's "efforts" seemed comedic in S&B.

I still remember how posts from 2020-2021 expressed bafflement about where did the Darkling actually manipulated Alina in S&B.

His first, full conversation with her? He lied to her three times and tried to figure her out. What her views are, what does she know about him, has her judgement been clouded by other people's opinions of him, how she feels about her supposed destiny. Apparently she failed in each one of them and the Darkling decided to withhold information since he didn't find her trustworthy. It was too early and she was too immature.

I've written about this scene here but I MUST put this reblog here as well because it's ✨gold✨

So for anyone who believes he should tell her the truth from the very beginning uhh....have you ever been to a job with a hierarchy?

(You can also read a very good meta about their first conversation here from @theweeklydiscourse)

His additional conversations with her? They lasted only ten minutes (maximum) and he mostly tried to soothe her fears and assure her that since she'll have the Stag she won't have to worry about the strength of her power. So, me, the reader, am I supposed to think "That walk that he took with her and lasted for five minutes was so suspicious"?. Ahh...ok.

That first kiss? Boy wasn't it awkward.

It was like I watched two high school kids being kissed for the first time💀

I'm sorry but if that was manipulating then he didn't succeed at making the reader say "Now that seems shady" but wonder "What the fuck was that?". The same thing Alina wondered apparently.

If he wanted to manipulate Alina, why didn't he stay longer with her? Why didn't he spend more time with her? The guy was missing for days from the Little Palace doing his duties and even Alina said that she didn't see him much. So where was the manipulation?

To the first, awkward kiss where he lost control for the first time?

To their Winter fete make out where he almost lost his pants?

(Homeboy couldn't even control his own feelings apparently)

Leigh describes him as "manipulative" but we have no context.

So basically it's like "Source? Trust me bro".

We only have a couple of characters accuse him of manipulation but no scenes to base the argument.

His attempts, in comparison to other truly manipulating characters in fiction (like Varys, Tom Riddle, Petyr Baelish, Tyrion Lannister, the Joker), seem honestly pathetic.

When the author doesn't know how to write such things then her "manipulative" characters and their attempts seem cartoonish, cringe and childish. There's no real danger to make the reader feel like there's something wrong. His scenes with her in the Little Palace only included attempts from his part to calm down her worries and their kisses only made the reader say "Oh he fell for her!" (Which is kind of funny because this is exactly what happened).

The only instance where he was manipulative and good at it was at the orphanage scene where he lied about the Grisha children and his plans with them in order to draw Alina out.

Besides that? Nada.

And it's actually strange to me when people call him "so manipulating" and it makes me think "Have you truly not read other manipulative characters from other authors to compare?"

Because, personally, I have and the Darkling seems like an idiot in comparison.

And this is not me trying to water down the Darkling but say how Leigh Bardugo is so incompetent in writing manipulative characters and try to present him as a "master" of it.

Because he was not.

(P.S. the fact that Leigh once said "I don't want my bad guys to carry a label saying "I'm evil" because I think the real bad guys are much more tactful in their attempts" is actually laughable considering how she gave her bad guy a label when she called him "the Darkling", gave him black clothes and a fearful reputation from the very first chapter. That man really didn't stand a chance from the beginning lmao)

#the darkling #if you're an author and don't know how to write manipulative characters then don't create them in the first place #otherwise the result will seem ridiculous and that character will look like a clown #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova #leigh bardugo #alina starkov #shadow and bone #grishaverse #grishaverse trilogy

[iicheeze]

3 MONTHS, 3 DAYS, AND 33 MINUTES

3 MONTHS, 3 DAYS, AND 33 MINUTES MASTERLIST

SUMMARY || you've always had feelings for your gray haired senior. To the point that you'd confess to the man in front of the whole Akademiya. Pitying you, he gives you 3 months, 3 days and 33 minutes to make him fall for you. Let the roller coaster of chaos begin!

PAIRINGS || Alhaitham x Gender Neutral Reader, slight Kaveh x reader

TW || cringe, use of slangs, the opposite of funny i guess idk just read it to see 😭

TAGLIST || @star-star-fall-inlove @nachotrash @baelloraa @itonashi @tanspostsblog @kalpie

(bold means I can't tag you)

CHAPTER I — ugly person thinks they're hot and confesses to crush in front of the whole Akademiya

“ I HAVE DECIDED! TODAY'S THE DAY! ”

Your yells echoed through the dorm hall, surprising everyone currently in it. Yet everyone understands what your words meant.

“ TODAY??? ” “ OH MY GOSH, THEY'RE GONNA DO IT. ” “ HOLY SHIT PREPARE YOUR POPCORNS ”

You've always had a FAT, MASSIVE, UNREQUITED love for a certain gray haired man in your college.

Sure, his personality may not be the best, but good lord, is his tits i mean body gorgeous.

But the thing is,

You two haven't even met yet.

You only saw him when you were running for your life to get into a lecture you're clearly late to.

And boy, did you fall.

Both literally and figuratively.

You may look and be labelled as the delusional weirdo in the college for wanting to confess to the man, BUT!

You still believe you have a chance.

Even if it's below 1%, you'll take the chance.

How will you confess to him?

Easy.

“ I LOVE YOU, ALHAITHAM! WILL YOU GO ON A DATE WITH ME? ”

You yelled, getting your feeling off your chest as you kneel with one knee, hand inviting the male in front of you.

However, the man in front of you is currently horrified. Not to mention, disgusted.

First of all, WHO ARE YOU??

Second of all, WHY IN FRONT OF THE FUCKING AKADEMIYA.

Third of all, why do you look like your proposing when you two aren't even acquaintances of any sort.

“ OH MY GOD. SOMEONE'S ACTUALLY BRAVE ENOUGH TO CONFESS TO HIM?? ” “ Bro, they're gonna be executed fr fr.... in public too... ” “ oh shit man, they're gonna get barbequed 😭 ” “ honestly, i'd be down bad for him too ” “ BABE??? ”

“ YES, GO CONFESS YOUR HEART OUT SLAY ” Your friend, Yoimiya cheered at the back of the crowd.

Currently, you and Alhaitham are in the middle of a circle-shaped crowd, all facing your way.

Finally taking time to actually breathe, Alhaitham sighed.

This person definitely belongs in a mental asylum.

“ I- I don't even know your name. ” The [taller/shorter] man exclaimed, “ It's [Name]! [Name] [Last Name]!! I fell in love with you ever since I saw you!! ” You stated loudly, as multiple laughs and chuckles were heard from the crowd.

The man scoffed.

“ Look, [Last Name]. I don't even know you, your major, what you do, what you don't do. How am I even supposed to go on a date with you when both you and I clearly have no knowledge about each other? ”

“ WE COULD GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER!! ” You stated, with a brave tone. In reality, you were breaking down on the inside. Good god, is he actually giving you a chance?? Out of all 1682628272 universe??

You were so pathetic it actually made him pity you. Your attempt was pathetic, your way of confessing was pathetic, good lord, even the way you dress is pathetic. You look even more homeless than a homeless person!

Alhaitham has encountered many types of people. Greedy ones, selfish ones, spoiled ones, ugly ones, pretty ones, kind ones.

Yet he has NEVER, EVER.

Seen a being so pathetic like you.

But he can't help but find this situation a little amusing.

“ Hmph, fine then. How about we make a deal? ” The man asked, tempting the person currently still kneeling on one knee.

“ I will give you the amount of exactly 3 MONTHS, 3 DAYS, AND 33 MINUTES to get you to make me fall for you. If you don't manage to do that, we will never see each other anymore for the rest of this timeline. ”

Was this just an intimidation tactic or is he actually asking for a deal?

“ And what if I manage to make you fall for me before the time limit is up? ” Sparkles seemed to appear around you, hope once again seemed to win the bloody fight of despair.

“ .. We'll see about that. Just to let you know, I'm not an easy man. ” His face grew closer to yours, your nose almost touching his. “ Well, I'm not one to easily give up as well. ” You replied, a smirk plastered on your face.

“ Yeah, we'll see. ” The control of his voice was so immaculate, you can't help but feel shivers down your bones. And upon saying that, he left. Seeming to disappear in the crowd.

Good lord, that was so hot.

You were originally going to stand up from your bone breaking position you've been holding for so long. But....

You realize you can't move.

“ WAIT, I CAN'T MOVE. MY CRAMPS. HAITHAM, HELP ”

author's note: sorry if this chapter is short 😭 the next following chapters will be way longer than this one as this is supposed to be like a prologue or introduction if yk wat i mean HSJHSJS

If there are any questions you can ask them at the comments!! and if there are any mistakes, please tell me!!

#3 months 3 days and 33 minutes series #genshin impact #genshin impact x you #genshin impact x gender neutral reader #genshin impact x male reader #genshin impact x female reader #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin x male reader #genshin x gender neutral reader #genshin x female reader #female reader #male reader #gender neutral reader #genshin alhaitham x reader #genshin alhaitham #alhaitham x reader #alhaitham x reader fluff #kaveh x reader #genshin kaveh x reader #genshin kaveh #kaveh x you #fluff #romantic comedy #genshin modern au

[pigeonwhumps]

Aftermath

Immortal Cannon Fodder masterlist

Taglist: @extrabitterbrain @wolfeyedwitch @painful-pooch @i-eat-worlds @a-funeral-romance @whumpinggrounds

Direct sequel to A Late Night Discovery by @i-eat-worlds, a crossover with their series Alex and Friends in which Joseph, their medic, finds Phoenix injured.

In this sequel, Aaron discovers more worrying things, and tries to take care of them.

2.7k

CWs: immortal whumpee, hero whump, abuse, mentioned child abuse, medical whump (past and current), painful wound care, being kicked out, team whump, fear of punishment, whumpee believing they're undeserving, low self-esteem, exhaustion, starvation, outcast whumpee

"You said you'd come to me if you were injured."

Phoenix cringes away from Aaron's disappointment. "I'm sorry, sir. I thought that, um, I could deal with it myself. It's not even bad."

"Hey. I'm not mad. But you've got a decent-sized gash on your side and you were going to attempt to treat it yourself. I suspect not too well either. Let me decide how bad your injuries are in future, alright?"

Phoenix nods. "What, um, what happens now? Am I free to go? It's really not that bad. It'll heal. I've had worse and, um, not gone to medbay."

"I don't want you heading back to your flat yet, not when there's a very real chance your teammates will make your injury worse. I estimate you'll be mostly healed by the end of my shift, and then you can go. Is that alright?"

Phoenix nods. It's unnecessary, but then so is a lot of what Aaron does for them. And Joseph too, apparently.

It's weird. They don't understand why Joseph's helping, he barely even knows them. But it makes them feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

"Thank you." Aaron squeezes their shoulder. "I'd better get back to work now. Please don't leave before I get back."

After Aaron's left, Phoenix curls up on the bed. The main problem with him visiting them when he's not busy is going to be fooling him into thinking they have somewhere to go. That won't be the case for months, if ever.

They spend most of the hours that Aaron's gone trying to think of an excuse to get them off their back so they can return to their hiding place in the corner of the supply cupboard. But it's... well. They have no idea what to say that would be convincing.

But if they don't... they've fucked up. They know they have. Indigo and Segun kicked them out, and they must've had a reason for it, even if they weren't exactly clear with Phoenix (and even if it is only temporarily). And now Aaron will be angry about it, and they don't think they can stand that.

They're starting to feel rather hungry. Maybe they can have a snack after Aaron discharges them. That's sort of the same way as their flat.

Well. It can be.

They could just leave now. They're tempted. But they promised Aaron they'd stay, and they can't break a promise. That would be worse.

Aaron returns several hours later, clean bandage in hand. He smiles tightly as he enters the treatment area.

"Okay Phoenix. I'm going to check your injury and then rebandage it. It might hurt a bit. Is that okay?"

"Yes, sir."

Aaron winces as they bend down beside them. "No need for all the sirs." Gently, oh so gently, they unwind the bandage around Phoenix's waist. Honestly, it's too gently, they don't deserve it. They don't understand why Aaron is being so, so gentle.

"It doesn't look too bad, it's starting to close. I'm going to touch it quickly to check for infection." Aaron's as good as his word, touching for a few seconds at most. "It doesn't feel hot, that's good. I think you're safe. Let me just rebandage it. Hold onto the bed if you need to."

Phoenix doesn't think they'll need to at first, it's not like it's that bad, they're hurt all the time without professional medical care, but the bandage pressing down hurts and they end up with the pillow in a white-knuckled grip.

Maybe it hurts more if they're professionals.

He's so gentle, but it still hurts. But then, the pain is only what they deserve, after all.

"There you go, kid. It should be finished healing sometime tomorrow. Are you in pain?"

Phoenix swallows. The honest answer is yes, but they deserve it. Aaron will try to give them painkillers if they say yes, and they don't need them. Those can go to other heroes who need them, who deserve them, because they certainly don't.

"I, um, don't need painkillers. I'm okay, really. Other, um, heroes deserve them more."

"That wasn't what I asked. But it still answers my question." He heads across the room and pops a couple of painkillers, handing them to Phoenix with a glass of water. "I want to make it absolutely clear, Phoenix. You deserve painkillers just as much as anyone else here, and anyone telling you otherwise is just manipulating you. We have plenty of medicine, we're not running short, and even if we were, that doesn't mean you wouldn't deserve them. Alright?"

Phoenix nods. They don't believe them, but they don't want to know what'll happen if they disagree.

Aaron nods. "Alright. Alright." He strokes their hair gently and they close their eyes involuntarily. They're so tired. Sleeping in a storage cupboard isn't exactly conducive to good rest.

"You're free to go now, if you like. There's no rush, but so long as you come back in the morning for a check-up I'll discharge you."

"Yes please." Phoenix hops off the table, overbalancing slightly and catching themself on Aaron's arm. It doesn't matter. If they leave now, alone, before Aaron has a chance to change their mind, maybe they can get to their cupboard without them finding out.

"Woah. Are you sure you're okay to go back on your own? You don't need me to walk you?"

Phoenix nods. "I'm fine. Thank you."

And they take the packet of painkillers that Aaron presses into their hand and walk out of the treatment area.

_

Aaron frowns after Phoenix as they exit the treatment area. They don't look well. The bags under their eyes are even more pronounced than normal, and that's saying something. And they look scared. They're stumbling into things, like they're going to collapse.

Aaron doesn't trust that they'll make it back to their flat alone.

He shouldn't, it's probably breaking their trust in some way, but he follows. And that... that isn't the direction of their flat.

He's not going to say anything. Not even going to approach, just keep an eye. But then Phoenix stumbles, and staggers, and trips into the wall, starting to slide down.

And Aaron runs. Fuck, no. They're not letting Phoenix hurt themself more.

They put an arm around their waist, lifting them upright. They'd rather carry them but they were so adamant about not wanting to be accompanied earlier, the least they can do is attempt to accommodate their wishes.

"Hey, hey. Easy. You're okay."

Phoenix shakes their head frantically. "No, no, please, I'm sorry. Just let me go, please, I didn't, um, mean to be an inconvenience, I'm sorry, don't, um, don't hurt me, don't punish me, I know I deserve it but please."

"Woah. Easy Phoenix. I'm not going to hurt you. Aside from anything else, it'd be a waste of my efforts in healing you, hmm? Come on, take a deep breath. That's it. I'll walk you back to your flat, yeah? Are you okay to do that?"

Phoenix sniffs. "I– I– I can't– I'm not allowed– please just– I don't–"

Their voice cracks and they break off, bursting into hoarse, racking sobs.

"Please."

They flinch as Aaron touches their shoulder, and he squeezes it once before letting go.

"What can't you do, Phoenix?"

"I can't– I'm not 'llowed– Indigo 'n' Segun kicked me out. 'Cos 'm useless and only Abbie's apprentice and they don't need to waste resources on me. Please, don't be angry, I'm sorry."

Aaron swallows down the instinctual rush of hot fury at that statement. "I would never be angry about that. Not at you, at any rate. It's not your fault they're unwilling to fulfill anything more than the exact wording of their contractual obligations. Hmm? Where are you staying at the moment?"

Phoenix eyes him warily, like they don't believe a word of it, and he tries not to feel hurt. This isn't about him.

"Storage– storage cupboard," they whisper. Aaron shakes their head.

"That won't do, especially now you're injured. Want to come stay with me instead?"

"I, um, don't deserve that."

Aaron raises an eyebrow. "You can't heal in a space as small as the cupboards you must be using."

"Can. Have. Lemme go."

"Let me take care of you."

"Don't need that. Can't pay you back for it. I'll mess up. Don't wanna... please."

"You don't need to pay. I'm just trying to help my friend. You. I mean, you can do some chores if you really want to, but it's not compulsory."

"Flatmates? Don't wanna make people angry."

"I don't have any. Medics have studio flats. Which you know, you've visited before. Let me help you. Please. I'll worry for ages if I don't."

"Shouldn't. 'm not worth it."

"Hey. I decide who's worth worrying about."

And he doesn't know why. Maybe it's the emotional side in him. Maybe it's the way they get so tearful, so disbelieving, whenever anyone's kind. How could anybody not want to comfort them?

"Can I give you a hug?"

Phoenix nods, looking startled. Aaron puts their arms around them properly, carefully, one wrapped fairly tightly around their shoulder. And Phoenix...

Phoenix crumbles. Leaning against their chest, head pressed against them, sobbing their heart out as they grip his scrubs like their life depends on it.

Maybe it does. Aaron wouldn't put anything past their team.

"Hey. Shh, you're okay, it's okay, you're safe. I won't let anyone hurt you. Just let it out, that's it, there you go, kid."

A nurse turns the corner into the corridor, immediately retracing her steps when she sees them. Aaron's grateful. Phoenix needs their privacy, even if it's hard to get here.

"Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." They murmur it like a desperate litany, a prayer, and in response Aaron hugs them tighter.

"Let me help you. Please."

Phoenix looks up, confusion creasing their face. "You're, um, not going to give up, are you?"

"No. I'm not leaving you in a supply cupboard. Or anywhere else that you won't be taken care of. I'm off shift now, so I can do that."

"O-okay then, I guess. Where, um, where are you taking me?"

"To my flat. If that's okay. Can you walk?"

Phoenix nods and clears their throat, putting one foot down properly on the ground, preparing to stand.

And promptly starts to slide back down.

"And that's a no. Arms around my neck, there you go. When did you last eat a proper meal, kid? You're getting towards skin and bones."

"I, um, I had some biscuits yesterday. They were good biscuits! I had nowhere to get proper food from anyway!" they add defensively. Aaron tucks a lock of hair behind their ear, stifling a sigh.

"Cafeteria?"

Phoenix blinks up at them. "We have one of those?"

"Well, yes. Did no-one give you a tour?"

"Abbie said I didn't need one. That everything I could need was in the flat, and if I thought I needed anything else either I wasn't looking hard enough or I didn't need it. And it hurt when I asked for unnecessary things." Phoenix tucks their head in the crook of their neck. "'m sorry."

"Nothing to apologise for." Aaron doesn't know why they're surprised by anything Abbie and her team do anymore. Not giving Phoenix a chance to meet other heroes is the perfect way to keep them isolated and abuse them with no fuss or suspicion. And yet. "Once you're healed, fed and rested, I'm giving you a tour. You live here, you should see everything. Alright?"

Phoenix nods, already half-asleep. They must be exhausted.

"Good."

Aaron lifts them more steadily into his arms. "Where are your belongings? So I can fetch them after we've got you settled down."

"You, um, you don't have to do that. I'm fine."

"I know I don't. But I'm going to."

"Supply cupboard 14," they murmur.

"Thank you. You're not fine, though."

Phoenix makes a noise of disagreement and grips Aaron tighter as they pass a doorway. Aaron rubs their back, and it's not far before they reach his room. It's a struggle to unlock his door, and to be honest Phoenix's confused attempts at helping only make it worse, but eventually he makes it through, placing them on the bed. He gets some pyjamas out of the basket and folds them next to them.

"You don't have to change, but if you want to, there's some clothes here. I know you, you won't get any out yourself. Use the bathroom if you want too. I'll be back soon, okay?"

"Okay."

Aaron gives them a tight smile and heads back out to the medical corridors, trying to compose themself as they go. The worst part of all this is Phoenix's complete obliviousness to anything being wrong. And why would they think it was? Their whole life they've been abused, why would they think its continuation wasn't normal?

But they shouldn't, and he hates it.

They don't have many belongings, just a small rucksack which presumably isn't everything (and worrying bloody smudges on some of the shelving that he tries his best to ignore), and Aaron slings it onto their back, avoiding the no-doubt-curious doctors and nurses. Best fetch a snack while they're out too. A sandwich or cereal bar will do.

He pushes the door to his room open as silently as possible and heaves a quiet sigh. Phoenix, predictably, is on the floor, curled around their stomach. They haven't changed, or washed, or done anything except move somewhere very uncomfortable.

"Why?"

Phoenix flinches. "I, um, I don't want to make your flat dirty. I can use a bucket, I don't mind, really."

"Well I do. This was going to wait until your birthday, but I guess..." Aaron rummages around in a drawer and pulls out a folded green rough-ish fabric, with something like ears at the top. "Happy early birthday."

Phoenix frowns at it, visibly confused, and unfolds it like it's the most precious thing they've ever received.

"Is this... is it, um, is it a Yoda bath robe?" they ask quietly, astonished.

"Baby Yoda I think, technically."

"Grogu," corrects Phoenix absently, and Aaron feels a little relief that at least they feel relaxed enough to do that. "I've always wanted... thank you."

"That's okay. I bet you'll look adorable in it." He ruffles Phoenix's hair, and they pout. "Now. You have a wash, I'll help with the bandages, and then I've brought you something to eat. I know you're exhausted, but you'll pass out from hunger if you're not careful. And you're not sleeping on the floor."

"Can I, um, sleep on the sofa?"

"No," says Aaron flatly. "You're taking the bed."

"But, um, but I'll make your flat dirty. I'm not too bad, I can sleep on the sofa. Let me, um, sleep on the sofa."

"Not with those injuries, and that exhaustion."

"But, but once, um, I'm healed, I, um, I can?" they ask hopefully.

"Yep," lies Aaron. It's always polite to let the guest sleep on the bed, after all, especially when they've spent their life being abused by those who should be helping them. "But take the bed tonight."

"Where will you sleep though?"

Aaron shrugs. "The sofa. Or I can share the bed, it is massive after all. And you'd better sleep as much as you need to."

"Oh."

Phoenix doesn't seem to know what to say to that, as Aaron helps them to the bathroom. He's already planning. When they wake up, they'll take them on a tour. Most of the medical staff know Phoenix. Have guessed some of what's happening. They won't mind swapping a shift with him.

Some will, but they'll just have to deal. Aaron is going to take Phoenix on a tour as soon as they feel up to it, whatever anyone else thinks.

That ends up being two days later, after they've slept for close to 24 hours straight, and then rested reluctantly for another day. Aaron only just resists shaking them to ensure they're still alive.

They will be, though. They always are.

#whump #whump writing #immortal cannon fodder #phoenix oc #aaron oc #whumpee and caretaker #immortal whumpee #hero whumpee #hero caretaker #hero whumper #hero whump #fear of punishment #abuse whump #medical whump #team whump #outcast whumpee

[an-unconscious-effort-comic]

Hello and welcome to An Unconscious Effort!

What is An Unconscious Effort?

At its heart, AUE is a story I wrote to one day be a webcomic about 4 kids being forced to navigate through the depths of the dream world, who all have their own attempts and ideas on how to establish a balance between their dreams and the real world, all while learning how to rely on others and be kinder to themselves.

The story follows 4 different POV’s.

The first quarter of the story will follow Abigail, a 14 year old girl who’s better at talking to plants than she is to people, and trying to figure out this whole ‘growing into the adult she wants to be’ thing, or whatever her mom says. Less and less people in the world have been able to report having dreams as of late, with many speculating if this could mean the start of something much bigger than themselves. So, when a mysterious entity from the dream world offers the opportunity of a lifetime for Abigail to help in reestablishing a balance between the dream world and the waking world and being apart of something that could change the lives of billions for the better, how could Abi even reject this offer?

Current status?

At the moment, the outline for this story is still being workshopped. I have 1/2 of the outline written, but still would like to go over it again once I reach the ending to probably rearrange and tweak some things before properly and officially starting to post the comic for-realsies.

There is already some beta chapters I posted to webtoon and tapas that I made while trying to get a feel for making webcomics in the first place, and while I am still proud of having made those, their quality and story is not representative of what I will be trying to create when I officially start the comic again. They were mainly made to be a learning experience at the time and I guess I did learn a lot.

Main Characters?

I’m glad you asked!! (you didn’t).

Abigail (Abi) - 14 y/o, she/her - Friendly neighborhood girlfailure who takes care of the plants.

(For anyone who remembers my utdr fanart, she was the oc I turned into patience)

Prawn - 15 y/o, he/him - If he sees you sitting on a bench all alone he will sit down next to you and strike up a conversation. This is not a possibility, it is a threat. He knows your location.

(Oc turned into kindness)

Marzipan (Marzi) - 16 y/o, she/her - Girlbossing her way through life, but at what cost.

(Oc i hid under the cut that I had turned into justice)

Meadow - 13-15 y/o?, she/they - What a cute little deer guy! Sure hope they’re not hiding any horrors in them!

(Oc that I turned into perserverance)

Whats this blog for?

Fuck if i know im bored lmao. I doubt this blog or comic will even be seen by anybody but I still sorta want to post some oc work on here and just…have some fun? Maybe organize some stuff about the comic here and post about characters sometimes. Idk I’ll figure it out I suppose

And if you’d rather see my art blog where I usually just post utdr fanart and be cringe then its @squidpedia while @squidpedias-reblogs is my rb account

If you read this far, you have bad taste but thank you

#an unconscious effort #pedia says stuff

[kiwiwinjindouche]

Just a "quick word" (it isn't) to thank you all.

I really am so thankful to have you because everyone is so chill with all my cringeness - I don't "care about numbers", I'm not a "big account" either, but I've never attempted to be one anyway. When I started posting things here, I didn't know how nor where to start, where this'll lead me, and I never thought so many people would be interested by my silly ideas and the such. I never lied about my favorite dude, and I know he's definitely not a lot appreciated, but that's Tumblr for you, I suppose! (I never thought I'd stumble upon a few other people who ship my rarepair either and everyday I'm so glad for all this). (I remember comments two years ago or so on Instagram where people were like "lmao wtf delete this" and I never really cared about it, because I know this is a controversial ship - and even if sometimes i feel really cringe/like i'm going too far, overall i don't want to stop because it makes me happy and I'm not hurting anyone)

I'm still a bit insecure from time to time, because I'm only 24 and full of stupid and good vibes, there's literally no way for me to be able to truly write the mindset of a 40ish mad inventor, and i tend to make people softer than they are sometimes, so if i do anything wrong with him, that's definitely not on purpose. I'm only delulu about his fate, but you can't come to me like "what about the atrocities! he's not nice!" and well, fork found in kitchen? It doesn't stop me to want him to be more than just that 'evil dude' and I like to see and explore what could have brought him to this (his past probably left some trauma on him and that doesn't help) (not to forgive anything or idk but imagine being hated by everyone around you, as a child that's fucked up)

You're making this 'fandom experience' fantastic and I met amazing people and I'd love to talk more with everyone but I'm so bad at social and PM on Tumblr GJDSJGFKLGDSKGJ I'm really sorry about my lack of social skills and how much i don't see passing time (anxiety? adhd? autism? could explain things, i can easily get overwhelmed by life and i'm very slow, a little french snail) (tbh, I don't have a lot of 'fandom experience', my first one was with Pokemon and I've met some of my dearest friends thanks to it, and a bit of Baldur's Gate 3 but it has to be one of the worst fandom ever lmao, and I followed it on Twitter, so yeah that was a strange experience)

Thank you all once again for existing, best wishes and much love <3

(I was feeling like getting emotional on main, but I've wanted to do this for a week or so. And even if we don't talk a lot, I appreciate every one of you and I support you)

#dagyne_rambles #love you guys

[missywritesfor7]

Coffee | KSJ

Synopsis: You find yourself working another late night in the office alone. You’re used to it, but things aren’t as typical this night. You start to think maybe your office building is haunted. What’s really hiding in your workplace?

Pairing: Jin x Reader

Word count: 3.4k

Warnings: my bad attempt at humor

It’s not unusual for you to have to stay in the office late into the night sometimes. It’s been a normal part of your job since you started there a year ago. What’s not so normal is the amount of technical issues you’ve had to face tonight between your computer forcing you to restart it immediately and the suddenly unstable internet connection.

You don’t mind staying late, that’s one of the few times you can get some peace. You can turn your music on and dance your way through your work. You don’t have to listen to the one coworker who has a strong opinion about everything, or smell the one who keeps burning their popcorn in the microwave making it essentially unusable for 24-48 hours. There’s no one constantly standing over your shoulder or the one really sweet coworker who unfortunately doesn’t know when to stop talking. Honestly, if it were up to you, you’d prefer to work these hours when you can be left alone.

The internet disconnects once again and you’re nearly fed up. You decide to go to the break room for a drink of water in hopes that the internet is back when you return to your desk. All of the lights in the building are motion sensor so the lights all turn on the moment you stand up.

The light feels blinding at this hour so you manually turn them back off and go into the break room where the lights turn on in there once you enter. You cringe then grab a cup and pour yourself some water from the dispenser. It seems someone had been in there earlier and left a half drank cup of coffee and a plate with nothing but crumbs sitting on the counter. You shake your head and sigh at how people can be so messy. You take it upon yourself to throw everything out once you finish your water.

The office is dark on all sides. The break room is in the middle of the floor with desks and office space on each side. The other side is for a different department which you hardly see except during company events or when you happen to go in the break room the same time as one of them. There’s only a few faces from that side that you recognize. Actually there’s only one face you recognize because it’s probably your favorite face in the entire office. Too bad you don’t even know his name, but damn he looks good.

You shake your head at the thought and bring yourself back to the present. You look over towards the other side of the office which is also dark and think of how lucky they must be that they never work late like you always do, but it’s also good because that gives you the solitude you enjoy.

You go back to your desk to see the internet is still down. You decide to do a little troubleshooting to the best of your ability to try fixing it. You follow the steps the computer’s troubleshooter guides you through until it tells you to provide the serial number for the router.

“How the fuck am I supposed to know that?” You mumble to yourself.

You’re ready to give up and go home and just deal with the additional work tomorrow, but you decide to at least try to find the router as your last attempt to fix it. You grab a pad of sticky notes and a pen and go in search of the router.

You aren’t too sure where it is but you know there’s a small room where all of the network connection devices are. To your surprise the door to the room is wide open when it normally would be closed. You don’t think much of it and go inside to look for the router. Thankfully everything is labeled so it’s not hard for you to find it, but you notice it’s unplugged. You can’t imagine why it’s unplugged or why someone had the door wide open in the first place, but something about it all is starting to seem suspicious.

You write the serial number down just in case then reach your hand behind the shelf the router is on and plug it back in. You shut the door as you leave and go back out to your desk to see that’s all it took and the internet is back connected. You still don’t know why it was unplugged in the first place or how since you’ve been here all day and there wasn’t a problem until recently. Either way, you get back to working so you can hurry and go home.

It seems you didn’t hurry enough and a few minutes later the internet goes out again.

“What the fuck?” You grumble. This is starting to get old and highly annoying.

You go back to the router and see that not only is the door open again but it’s unplugged again as well.

“What the hell is going on?” You don’t want to overreact but you’re definitely starting to get nervous.

You look around the room and see nothing. You plug the router back in and leave shutting the door behind you. On your way back to your desk you make another stop in the break room for another cup of water. Things are weird and you just need a drink to keep your composure.

While you’re sipping your water you notice the cup of coffee is somehow on the counter again. You know you poured it out and threw the cup away so you have no clue how a new cup of coffee appeared. There’s not even any coffee being made in the coffee maker, and the coffee seems to be room temperature as if it had been there a while.

None of this is normal so you poke your head around while staying safely close to the well lit break room. There’s no one on your side of the office and you can’t see a single person on the other side of the office. When you step into the area the motion lights don’t even come on, which they should since you only turned the lights off on your side of the office.

You take a few more steps around looking for signs of life, but you find nothing. There’s no one there. No one asleep at their desks. No computers left on. Not a soul in sight. You don’t know where the phantom coffee is coming from, but you figure it’s best to get back to work and hopefully get out of there quickly.

You return to your desk to begin working again when the power on the entire floor goes out. You’re about to bang your head on the desk when you’re startled by a shrill scream that came from somewhere on the floor. You won’t say you’re scared, but your heart rate has spiked and your arms are littered with goosebumps. Part of you wants to investigate, but another part of you would rather pack your things and try again during daylight hours.

You decide to do just that and try again tomorrow. You start to gather your things then the power returns. Maybe it’s not worth the fight. Plus you’re tired and hungry. You shut your computer down and head for the elevator.

“AISHHH!!!”

A loud yell rips through the office again and you duck for cover out of instinct. You’re quietly listening for anyone but you hear nothing else. The power flickers again delaying your elevator escape. Clearly there’s someone here so you decide maybe they need help.

Against your better judgment, you turn on your phone’s flashlight and slowly make your way in the direction of the scream. You aren’t actually sure where the sound came from so you’re mostly going into this blind. The way your heart is pounding out of your chest doesn’t make things any easier.

Each step you take feels like impending doom. You’re almost certain this is how it feels to walk the plank. When you reach the break room you stop a moment to look around. The cup of coffee is still there seemingly untouched, but a new plate has now replaced the one you threw away earlier.

This time you decide to inspect the other side of the office closer. You didn’t give it a very good look so maybe you missed someone. It’s the only thing you can convince yourself of to keep from panicking. You’re panicking anyway. Every step you take feels like it’s taking years off your life.

You snake through all of the cubicles and even poke your head in the offices to see if there’s anyone around but you find nothing. Not a single sign of life. It’s dark and empty just like the rest of the office.

The power turns back on, but not in the main parts of the office. You turned the lights off on your side and apparently someone did the same to this side. But who? And why? And most importantly, where are they?

With the power running again and your nerves shit, you decided you don’t care enough to stick around any longer. You make your way back towards the elevators when the sound of something crashing behind you scares you out of your skin.

You quickly turn around and see nothing. You run to the light switch and turn all of the lights back on only to see nothing. No one there and nothing that could have fallen and made that sound.

You take quick panicked steps towards the back of the office. You poke your head in the break room to see nothing has changed. You then go towards the room where the router is. The door is only slightly cracked so you throw it open and your soul is sucked clean out of your body when you hear a deafeningly loud scream from a man standing right in the doorway.

“What the fuck?!?!!!!” You scream back in a panic.

“What are you doing here?!?” He yells.

“What are you doing here?!” You shout back.

“Working! What the fuck?!” He clutches his chest and takes a deep breath. “Who are you?!”

He turns on the light and you finally get a look at him. To your surprise, he’s the one guy you recognize who works in the other part of the office. The guy who, although scared to death in this moment, still looks just as handsome as ever.

“Why are you here??” He asks again.

“I was trying to work, what the fuck?”

“Are you the one who threw my coffee away?!” He huffs.

“Are you the one who keeps fucking with the internet?!” You question.

“I’m doing maintenance!”

“By unplugging the router?”

“Duh!” He sasses. “That’s the first step when troubleshooting anything!”

“Why didn’t you just get someone from IT to fix it instead of unplugging it?”

“I am IT!”

“And your solution was to unplug it?”

“It usually works,” he shrugs.

“Wow,” you chuckle. “I guess now that I’ve solved that mystery I’m going to just go home now.”

“Why are you working so late anyway?” He asks.

“I always do,” you shrug. “I’m usually alone though, not being haunted by a coffee drinking IT ghost.”

“You owe me a coffee by the way.”

“Fine,” you sigh. “Do you want me to brew you a pot right now?”

“No, I don’t like that coffee.” He turns and pulls a large bottle out of his backpack that’s sitting on the chair. “I like this coffee.”

He holds up the bottle that is just a juice bottle that’s been emptied and filled with coffee. The label is ripped off and written in marker is ‘Jin’s Brew’ across the bottle.

“Jin’s brew?” You ask. “Who is Jin?”

“I’m Jin!” He stomps his foot. “This is my special brew that I made myself.”

“Ok…how am I supposed to pay you back for your coffee if you only want your special brew? And why do you drink it at room temperature?”

“Can I not have a preference?” He snaps.

“Ok ok, take it easy,” you laugh. “I’m not knocking your preference, just…curious.”

Now that you know he’s not a ghost or an intruder you feel more amused by him. He’s tall with broad shoulders and the face that you wish you could see more than just once or twice a year. At least now you finally know his name is Jin and he works in IT. You start to consider if you should switch to the IT department so you could have some eye candy for once, but mid-thought the power goes out again causing Jin to shriek.

“Stop doing that!” You shout.

“I didn’t do anything!” Jin shouts trying to calm his volume and heart.

“Why does the power keep going out? It’s not even raining!”

“I don’t know.”

“Can’t you figure it out, IT man?”

“IT has nothing to do with power failure!”

Just then you both hear a sound from the other side of the office.

“Who else is here with you?” Jin asks.

“No one,” you say. “Who else is here with you?”

“No one.”

“Ok,” you resolve. “I think I’ll just get out of here because this is crazy.”

“Where are you going to go?” He asks. “The elevators aren’t going to work with no power.”

“I’ll take the stairs.”

“From the 12th floor?”

“You don’t think I can?”

“I didn’t say that, but…maybe we should stick together right?”

“Then come with me,” you offer.

“From the 12th floor??”

Just then a crashing sound rings from another part of the office startling you both again.

“Are you sure you’re alone?” Jin asks quickly grabbing his things.

The lights come back on and it’s a bit blinding after being in the dark. You both pause to listen for anything or anyone around but hear nothing.

“Let’s just get on the elevator before the power goes out again,” he says. “Come on, you have to stay by me because you still owe me a coffee.”

“Really?” You huff following behind him. “How am I supposed to pay you back if you’re a coffee snob?”

“Well excuse me for not wanting to drink the stale coffee in the break room,” he says rolling his eyes.

“Ok then, what other coffee would you drink?”

“Whatever you get me,” he smiles pressing the button for the elevator.

You can’t help but smile back at his big cute smile. He really is the best looking guy in this office. Although he’s being fussy, you can sense the humor in his tone which makes you even more smitten for some reason.

The two of you enter the elevator when it arrives and Jin immediately hits the button for the ground floor. He looks over at you and smiles again.

“I’ve seen you around the office a few times,” he says finally seeming to recognize you. “Didn’t you wear the hot pink unicorn sweater for last year’s ugly sweater contest?”

“Yeah,” you chuckle a little embarrassed. “I didn’t really have any other sweater.”

“I liked it,” he laughs.

“Thanks,” you laugh along. “You can have it because I may never wear it again.”

“Why? It’s perfect.”

Just as the elevator nears the 4th floor, the power goes out again bringing you both to a harsh and immediate stop.

“Nooo!!” Jin wails. “This place is fucking haunted!!”

“Easy there,” you say trying to hold back your laughter. You thought you were scared before, but he’s much worse than you and that makes you feel a bit better. “We just have to wait it out until the power comes back.”

“The walls are closing in,” he says hitting the emergency call button.

“Don’t be so dramatic,” you laugh.

“I’m glad you find this funny,” he pouts.

“Just chill. Sit down and just be patient.” You grab his arm and get him to sit on the floor with you.

There’s silence at first. The two of you sit there with your faces dimly lit by the back up lights in the elevator. You aren’t sure what to say now. Who knows how long you two will be stuck here.

“Well…” Jin says digging into his backpack. “We may be here a while so do you want to play Halli Galli?”

“What?” You ask watching him pull out a bell and a deck of cards. “You just…carry that around with you?”

“You never know when a situation will call for a game of Halli Galli.”

“What?” You laugh. “What type of situation would you possibly be in that would call for a game of Halli Galli?”

“The one where I’m stuck in an elevator for an indefinite amount of time with someone.”

“Are you always this funny?”

“Funny? I’m serious. I like to be prepared for anything.”

You stare at him a moment trying to read his expression but he’s hard to read. His tone is playful but somehow he’s keeping a straight face, which for some reason just makes him even funnier to you.

“Do you want to play or not?” He asks dealing the cards.

“You don’t seem to be giving me a choice,” you chuckle.

“Thanks for being a great team player,” he jokes, blessing you with the shadow of his gorgeous smile.

Despite the low visibility, you two begin playing a game of Halli Galli. Mostly it’s him dominating the entire game, but you find yourself actually having fun. You both chat as you continue playing and learn more about each other.

You learn that he’s single, lives alone, he has a brother, and he’s very enthusiastic about the library of games he has on his computer. He tells you more about his special coffee that he made himself. He took a workshop on a whim one day and learned how to create his own blend. He’s quite an interesting person who also makes you wish that the power would stay out for just a bit longer so you could continue talking.

“It’s too bad we don’t see each other in the office more,” Jin says. “Maybe instead of coffee, you can pay me back with something else?”

“Like what?” You ask.

“Any drink of my choice.”

“Ok,” you agree. “What drink do you want?”

“I’ll think about it and get back to you. You have to agree to it any time I say though.”

“Really?” You pout. He nods and you give in to his bread cheeks. “Fine.”

“First we have to get out of this capsule of death.”

“It sounds 100 times more awful when you call it that.”

“I’m sorry,” he teases. “I’ll call it ‘the elevator in which we will die if we aren’t rescued’.”

“That’s better,” you joke.

There’s a loud grumble that echoes through the elevator. Jin looks at you with wide eyes then sighs.

“I’m starving but I already ate most of my snacks,” he pouts. “I only have a few gummies left.” He reaches into his backpack and pulls out an open bag of gummy worms. “Want one? There’s 3 left.”

“That’s very gentlemanly of you,” you smile taking the offered worm and popping it in your mouth. Handsome, funny, and sweet. What a package.

Just as you two finish snacking on Jin’s emergency gummies, the power comes back on. The lights in the elevator power on rendering you both blind for a second.

“Finally!” Jin shouts jumping to his feet and punching the button for the ground floor. “I’m so hungry!!” He punches the button again.

“Make it work faster, Mr. IT!” You tease standing up.

“Hush, coffee thief!” He hits the button again and the elevator finally begins to move.

You both breathe a sigh of relief once the elevator finally reaches the bottom and the doors open to the lobby.

“Sweet freedom!” Jin dramatically shouts as he emerges from the elevator.

All you can do is laugh. The building is clearly haunted or something, but you were much less anxious with Jin keeping the mood light, though you’re not even sure if he does it intentionally.

“Come on,” he says grabbing your arm. “There’s a restaurant nearby and you owe me a drink of my choice.”

“Restaurant? Now?” You ask.

“You’re hungry too, aren’t you?” He smiles. “You buy my drink, I’ll buy your food.”

“Wait, how-”

“You can’t say no, remember? That was part of the deal.”

“I wasn’t going to say no,” you chuckle. “I just wanted to know what kind of drink you wanted.”

“After all of this? A strong one,” he laughs.

“Agreed,” you nod. “Let’s go!”

#bts #bts au #bts fanfic #bts fic #cross posted on ao3 #humor #my attempt at humor #Jin #jin x reader #kim seokjin #jin fanfic #jin fic #handsome Jin #a little spooky #Jin au

[laurfilijames]

Okay, I watched Green Street Hooligans. I don’t think I’d seen it before. He was so good in it (other than the accent… geez!) So violent too (not a bad thing but wow!) he was so young in it. I loved how he was a teacher too 😂

Have you watched Shantaram? I can’t quite get through it 😅 again, the Aussie accent is just 😫 (I can’t get past it, being Aussie myself 😂)

Anyway, I’m back on SOA cause he is so good in that and his accent is good, plus the storylines are good. (And the visuals. They’re good too lol)

🤣 yeah people always harp on his Cockney (or valiant attempt at one) in it. I guess I've watched it so many times now that it doesn't even faze me because I'm simply 😍 for Pete no matter what. My uncle is from East London and when I watched it with him his first reaction was "You've got to be fucking kidding me" over the accents 🤣🤣

I'm glad you thought his performance/character was good despite the accent! I will always love how they sort of tricked the audience into thinking Pete was nothing more than a hooligan, only to reveal more depth and "normalcy" like him being a teacher.

I have watched Shantaram! Twice!!! (I'm an addict and rewatch everything he's in over and over...) I absolutely love it and am still so disappointed that it wasn't picked up for another season. I'm sorry that his accent is cringe to you in that too 🥴 especially if you're an Aussie yourself! All I know is he worked really hard on trying to get it down and I wouldn't ever be able to attempt any of these accents 🤣 I think it's definitely worth continuing if you can get past it as it's such a lovely, heartfelt story and it's incredible what this man went through.

Ahhhh Sons. I'm only in season 5 of it and really find it difficult to pace myself through the series because it's so intense and I have so many conflicted feelings toward Jax. I know what happens in the show, and I think that's part of the reason why I've been stalling 😅 but you're absolutely right that he is so good in it and the visuals are 👌🥵

Thank you for coming to chat about your thoughts on these works!! I love discussing them, as you can probably tell 😝🫠

#charlie hunnam #green street hooligans #shantaram #sons of anarchy

[that-gay-guy-from-hell]

A Valentine’s to Remember: Dante x Male Reader

Better late than never...

MINORS DNI

SERIOUSLY

SHOO

Summary: Spending Valentine's Day with the youngest son of Sparda. He wants to make sure this year is one to remember.

BEGINNING NOTES: I hope you all enjoy this one. It's now my longest chapter at whopping 8410-ish words. 💝💌💝 💟Just some fluffy stupid Dante things… and smut, of course, lmao. Also, pardon the semi-cringe writing, I don’t really know what people do for this holiday. Also… this is my first time really leaning into the Male reader aspect of things; in Nero’s story, those aspects were just kinda there… This one is pretty heavy-handed; so please bear with me. 💟I also skipped the actual eating part of the date because I am bad at writing that stuff… but I tried to keep the rest semi-realistic?? You’ll see what I mean lmaooo 💟While writing this I realized Nero could've been Valentine’s baby… and that I accidentally H/C-ed DMC 3 to take place during February/March 💟Please check Dante’s H/Cs for what outfit he has; I don’t actually reference it per se but it gives you an idea as to what I was using to write with. I will also explicitly say when he uses his DT; I tend to use the phrase “red devil” to replace his name and I don’t want any confusion. 💟I also figured out why I think Dante uses names that are kinda “southern”--his fucking DMC 4 outfit is semi-country themed lmao. 💌💝💌 💟Fluff & Smut 💟Bottom Male reader x Top Dante: Pre-established relationship. 💟The reader is kinda horny ngl 💟Minor mentions of homophobia. 💟Semi-aggressive Dante; encouraged by the reader--kinda bratty reader. 💟Use of biting/hickeys. 💟Use of a leash/collar; that’s it though--no actual pet play. 💟Minor choking; via collar and leash tugging. 💟Dante giving you a rim job for the first time. 💟Possessive kink. 💟Devil Trigger sex.

==

     A cold chill ran up your spine as you groggily opened your eyes. You slowly groped around on the bed for your personal heater--and boyfriend--Dante. However, his side of the bed was empty and, from how cold the mattress was, he had been gone for some time. A pout and slightly furrowed brow decorated your face as you grumbled. It wasn’t uncommon for you to wake up and Dante to be gone (typically on a job); however, he told you that he was going to have today off. It seems that something must have come up. 

     You glanced over at the alarm clock ‘11:03’, “Damn it’s early…” you thought to yourself as you rolled over and tried to go back to sleep. However, you were now wide awake and still cold. 

     With a groan, you got out of bed. The wooden flooring was frigid against your bare feet as you made your way to the door. But, before you could open the door, it swung open--hitting you square in the forehead.

     “Shit!” Dante stared wide-eyed at you, “I didn’t know you were-- you okay?”

     You shook your head attempting to ignore the quickly growing headache, “I’m fine,” you looked up at the red devil, “Thought you had left for the day; why you up so early?”

     Your lover smiled goofily, “You know what today is?”

     “Tuesday?” you were still groggy as you gave Dante a perplexed look. 

     “Mhm…” Dante was staring at you; implying there is more.

     With a slow blink, you rummaged through your still-tired thoughts; what were you missing?

     Your lover began to pout, “You really don’t know?”

     With a shake of your head, you scratched your jaw, “I got nothin’.”

     “It’s Valentine’s Day!” Dante grabbed you and pulled you into a tight hug.

     You lightly wrapped your arms around your lover, “Mmm, that’s why you’re up at the ass-crack of dawn?”

     “What can I say,” Dante rubbed his cheek against the top of your head, “I wanted today to be perfect for my special guy.”

     A loving smile spread across your face as you heard Dante begin to quietly purr, “You didn’t have to do anything for me… Although it is really sweet of you.”

     Dante stood back with his hands on your shoulders, “Of course, I had to! Gives me a reason to take you out on the town and show you off,” he winked with a wide grin.

     You snorted a tired laugh, “That’s cute, Dante,” you moved one of your hands to cup his cheek and stared into his eyes, “How did I get so lucky, hm? My cute lil’ devil~” Dante’s eyes closed as he leaned into your touch; his purring getting noticeably louder. 

     The red devil opened his eyes and gently leaned in to kiss your forehead. He opened his mouth as if he were going to speak before the ringing of the shop's phone stopped him, “Damn it- I have to get that, meet me downstairs?” 

     “Sure,” you smiled at him as he left the doorway. With that, you continued to your original destination; the bathroom. 

     After you finished your typical morning routine, you sauntered down the stairs of the DMC. Dante was sitting at his desk and was still on the phone. 

     “Yes but-- You see-- We--” Dante noticed your presence and shook his head, “I have to go. I’ll call back tomorrow during operating hours, thanks for choosing Devil May Cry!” he hung up the phone before the caller could respond. Dante let out an exaggerated groan and leaned back in his chair.

     You laughed and sat on the edge of his desk, “Thought we were closed today?”

     “That’s what I told ‘em, but of course, people never fuckin’ listen.”

     With a small laugh, you got up. After you moved behind the desk, you yanked out the cord from the phone, “Taking a note from your book.”

     Dante smiled and grabbed your wrists to pull you onto his lap, “Well, I’m glad I taught you somethin’.”

     “Well,” you set your head on his shoulder and whispered into his ear, “There’re other things you’ve taught me too…” you felt Dante shiver as you gently bit his earlobe.

     “Mmm, aren’t you fired up,” he ran his hands down your sides, settling on your hips, “but I’ve got other things in mind first,” Dante’s teeth gently grazed your neck as he gently kissed your soft skin, “you'll have to wait till later.”

     You clicked your tongue in slight disappointment, "You have a brain aneurysm or something? Since when do you not want sex?"

     “Come on,” he gently rubbed his thumbs against your legs, “I promise it’ll be worth the wait~” 

     You pulled back to look at his face and saw him smirking slightly, “Ooo now I’m curious as to what my devil’s got planned,” your fingers slowly groped up his arms and to his shoulders where you let them rest.

     He laughed and smiled widely, “I made sure that this will be the best Valentine’s you ever had.”

     “I quite enjoyed last year,” you unconsciously bit your lip as you remembered last year. How Dante’s rut lined up with the holiday and left you unable to walk for several days.

     “Heh, well you’ve still got to look forward to that in the coming months-” he placed one of his hands on your chest, “Today we are focusing on this.”

     “My tits? You gonna like motorboat me or some shit?”

     “What-- No, I--”

     You snorted, “I’m fucking with you, Dante,” you placed your hand on top of his, “It’s weird seeing you act so romantic .”

     “Oh just you wait,” Dante’s eyes closed as he gave a toothy grin, “It’ll be a night to remember.”

     Seeing how sincere he was brought a warm fluttery feeling to your heart, “Well, what’s the plan then?”

     “What time is it?”

     “Well,” a small laugh left your lips as you looked at the clock up on the wall behind Dante, “It’s still 9:04 AM, the same time it’s been for a few weeks now.”

     The younger twin sighed, “I keep forgetting to fix that…”

     “When I got up,” you ran your fingers through Dante’s hair, “It was like eleven, so probably like eleven-thirty by now..?”

     “Mmn,” Dante leaned his head onto your chest, wanting you to continue petting him, “Well I have to stop by Vergil and Nero… So we’d be leaving around four?”

     “Want me to come with you?” you added your other hand to his hair.

     Dante began to purr slightly, “Nah, I’m just dropping off some job stuff.”

     The two of you sat together for a few minutes. While you were gently running your fingers through his locks, he pulled you as close as he could. His hands firmly rested on your lower back and his face was nuzzling into your chest; enjoying the affection. 

     However, this was short-lived as Dante’s cell phone began to ring. The red devil grumbled and released his hold on you, allowing you to stand up. With a huff, he grabbed the device off his desk; answering it. 

     You wandered over to the fridge and grabbed a drink.

     As you sat on the edge of his desk once more, you saw that Dante was already off the phone, “That was quick,” you raised a brow, “Nero? Or Vergil?”

     Dante stood up, “The kid, asked when I was coming; ‘pparently he’s got plans for today.”

     A smile found its way to your face, “Ooo how cute-- wait,” you cocked your head to the side, “since when does Nero have a partner?”

     The red devil laughed, “Nero doesn’t have one,” he sighed softly, “he’s spending the day with his old man; since neither of them has company.”

     “Really--” you shook your head in disbelief, “That’s actually kinda cute.”

     “It was part of the reason I was dropping this shit off, rather than just letting them see it tomorrow,” he looked over at the photo of Eva on his desk, “figure I should at least see them; especially Verge.”

     “Aw,” you couldn’t help but laugh a bit, “Now that's adorable,” it was then that you noticed Dante looking over at his mother’s photo, “your parents would be happy to see you three getting along.”

     Dante nodded and spoke softly, “Yeah,” he moved his eyes to you and returned to his usual boisterous tone, “I should probably get going; you okay with sittin’ tight for a bit?” he slid on his coat that had been tossed over the back of his chair. Then moved to stand in front of you and held your hands in his.

     “Sure, gives me time to get all prettied up for you,” you winked with a sly grin.

     “I think you look good just like that, darlin’,” he leaned in and kissed your forehead, and placed his head atop yours.

     You pursed your lips and stifled a laugh, “I am not going out in my sleepwear…” you looked down at your shirt. It was an old ratty black t-shirt that you had “borrowed” from your devilish lover… not to mention that you were without pants, as well.

     He leaned back just enough to see your face, “Why not? You look good like this.”

     “Dante,” you shook your head, “If we are going out, pretty sure I need pants.”

     The younger twin just stared into your eyes, fighting an obviously perverse comment. 

     “Cat got your tongue?” you teased, egging him on.

     A small huff left Dante’s nose, “You really are gorgeous, you know that?” his voice was sweet but had an impure feeling laced behind it. 

     “You’re not too bad yourself,” you leaned in brushing your lips against his, “my handsome legendary hunter.”

     Dante smiled as he intertwined himself with your lips. These kisses were slow and sweet. Dante let out a breathy laugh upon feeling you pull him in by his coat, deepening the kiss. His hands held the sides of your hips and he gave you small kitten licks upon your lips; asking for you to open your mouth. 

     A part of you wanted to play hard-to-get and not let him in; however, before you could even decide, Dante had pushed his tongue within the confines of your mouth. While he might not be the most experienced kisser out there, Dante sure as hell knew how to use his split tongue to his advantage. 

     The red devil explored every inch of your cavern. A quiet groan left your lips as he played with your tongue. You were running out of breath, so you tried to leave the kiss but Dante had other plans. He pushed his lips against yours harder, letting out a small rumbling moan. 

     His fingertips began to dig into your hip's soft flesh, surely bound to leave loving bruises. You were beginning to feel light-headed as you gently pushed against his chest, trying to separate from the kiss. Dante allowed you to leave the kiss and moved to kiss your jawline. You took in a loud large breath. 

     Dante’s kisses began to wander down your neck and to your shoulder. All the while, he began to lean you backwards onto the desk. He began to nibble against your skin, not quite hard enough to leave marks but enough that you could feel it. You wrapped your legs around his waist and ran your hands along his back, kneading as hard as you could against his strong back. 

     “Ngh, Dante~” you squirmed under his weight.

     The red devil stopped his small bites and moved back to your lips, continuing his slow sloppy kisses from earlier. Once satisfied with how aroused he got you, he leaned back up and gave you a sly devilish grin.

     He slowly eyed you up and down before speaking, “We’ll have to save the rest for later,” he winked.

     With a pout, you removed your legs from his body, “You fucker…”

     “Mm not right now,” he helped you sit upright, “I will be later though.”

     You rolled your eyes, “You really are mean, you know that?”

     Dante’s grin turned wider as he patted the top of your head, “You're the one who decided to date a devil--not the smartest choice."

     "Oh trust me, the perks outweigh the cons," you sighed and reached forward to fix his coat, “You best hurry along-- Don’t need Nero killing you on Valentine’s.”

     “I’ll be back soon, okay?” he leaned forward and kissed you on the top of the head, “Then it’s date time.”

     You couldn’t help but smile at his beaming face, “I can’t wait.”

     With that, Dante turned to leave; grabbing his phone from the desk and waltzing out the front door.

     4 o'clock quickly came and went; it was now approaching 6 pm and you were starting to get concerned. It was quite common for Dante to get carried away with talking and just overall enjoying spending time with others, but you figured that he would’ve been back by now. Dante spending time with his family (especially Vergil) without fighting is a rarity, so you did your best to leave him be--only texting him a few times to figure out what was going on and if he was okay. A part of you wanted to call him but you figured that would be too much. 

     You’d been waiting on the couch for nearly an hour. A loud exasperated sigh left your lips as you leaned forward. You had showered and gotten all dressed up for your date and were getting uncomfortable in your "fancy" clothes. Not having anything better to do, you decided to see if the jukebox was going to work today. You selected a track, “Devils Never Cry” (one of Dante’s favorites), and were pleasantly surprised when it worked.

     With that, you then grabbed some darts from the desk and began to half-ass through them at the board. You were bored enough that you challenged yourself to a game of 501; keeping track of two amounts at once. 

     “Fucking-- Where are you, Dante?!” you growled as you yanked the darts from the board, finishing your third game, “That’s it,” you pulled out your phone and called him.

     No answer.

     You tried again.

     Still nothing.

     With an irritated click of your tongue, you decided to shoot Nero a text; asking if he can send Dante back. 

     Surprisingly, Nero responded pretty quickly saying, “Dante left like an hour ago? He’s not back?”

     You went pale and nearly dropped your phone at the sound of your ringtone. It was Nero.

     The moment you answered, Nero spoke, “Hey, Dante’s still not back?”

     “I haven’t seen him since he left earlier,” you felt a sinking fearful feeling settle in your gut, “I’m kinda starting to worry.”

     Before Nero responded, someone else (presumably Vergil) yelled something at Nero that you couldn’t make out. Then the teal devil returned to your call, “Vergil said that Dante was stopping somewhere on the way back; whatever that means…” 

     With a heavy sigh, you mumbled, “Alright- I guess I’ll give him a bit longer. Thanks, Nero.”

     You went to hang up but heard him yell, “Hey wait--”

     “Hm?” you put the phone back to your ear.

     “Let me know if like, he’s not home soon-- Vergil and I can go find him.”

     A small smile tugged at the corner of your lips, “Sure, can do.”

     “Well… Take care and uh… Happy Valentine’s…” 

     “Mhm, you too Nero,” you both hung up.

     Another fifteen minutes passed and you were slowly nodding off on Dante’s desk; leaning forward in his chair and your face on the tabletop.

     You had thought about what Vergil could’ve meant, “Dante probably stopped by Lady and Trish,” you sighed through your nose. 

     Despite knowing how stupid it was, you couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous about the three’s friendship. When you first joined the DMC, you thought they were in a poly-relationship with each other; only to find out that they were just work partners. 

     A quiet distant bitter thought pricked at the edges of your mind, “Maybe he decided to spend the holiday with them instead…” your brow furrowed at the thought, “He seemed so excited this morning…”

     Another sigh left your nose as you tried to focus on the now jukebox’s music to drown out those toxic thoughts. That’s when you heard the front door open.

     “Hey sunshine, I’m back!” a loud happy voice called. 

     However, you didn’t look up and just stayed with your head down on the desk, grumbling in response, “Welcome back.”

     You could hear Dante’s pout as he walked over to the desk, “I know, I know… I didn’t mean to be gone that long, I’m sorry,” he placed a hand lightly on your head.

     “Where have you been,” you picked up your head to look at him, “I was getting worried…”

     He avoided your gaze, “Well… I stopped at Vergil and Nero’s and chatted for a while. I would’ve been home sooner, but,” he sighed and had a dejected look on his face, “I called to double-check some reservations that I swear to God that I made; like I even called Vergil cause I know that I told him and the fucking place said that I didn't and I--”

     You grabbed his hand, “Hey, Hey-- Dante, slow down.”

     “Shit, sorry,” he took a deep breath and let out an even louder sigh than before, “I made reservations for us to go to one of those fancy restaurants where you get to watch like a musical or some shit while you eat and… and when I called to double-check the time, they said they have no record of my reservation. So I went there and tried to talk to someone in person and they said without a receipt we can't help you… then I asked if there were any open seats at any time and they said no and I just…” his voice trailed off.

     “Oh…” you didn’t know how to respond. Dante was a lot angrier about this than he was letting on; signified by his hand being so hot that you had to let go of it. 

     “I’m sorry, babe,” his eyes were filled with a pang of deep sadness as he looked at you with a frown.

     “Hey,” you stood up and walked over to the front of the desk, standing in front of him, “It’s okay, it’s not your fault,” you gently hugged him, “It’s the thought that counts and besides,” you felt him wrap his arms around you and purr slightly, “I’ve still got the best Valentine I could ask for.” 

     Dante took a slow breath and leaned further into the hug, speaking in a hushed whisper, “I wanted this year to be special…”

     “We can still go out,” you smiled, “Isn’t that pizza parlor that knows you by name open today? We could go there.”

     A small huff of a laugh left Dante’s lips as he began to unconsciously knead his hands against your shoulder blades, “You sure you’d be okay with that? It’s not exactly fine dining .”

     You stood back a bit so you could look at him, “I’m sure, plus,” your smile widened, “We don't have to mingle with those rich assholes.”

     Dante laughed and looked down at you, “Good point… shall we then?”

     “Of course, lead the way, legendary devil hunter,” you winked at him as he shook his head.

     You quickly sent Nero a text that said Dante returned safe and sound. Then turned off the lights and grabbed your coat. With a laugh and wide smiles, the two of you headed out. 

     Both of you waved goodbye at the parlor workers as they yelled their goodbyes. Once out the door, Dante grabbed your hand and intertwined your fingers with his. The two of you decided to take a small detour on the way home and walk through the park. As the two of you began to move down the sidewalk, you thought about how Dante is the only person that the parlor called by name.

     You laughed, “I still can’t believe they know you by name, it surprises me every time.”

     “Been ordering there since it opened,” Dante awkwardly smiled, “I know that I had a pretty lengthy tab open there at one point.”

     You did a double-take, “Since when do restaurants do that?”

     “Well,” Dante sighed and shook his head, “I was a regular before the whole Vergil thing when we were younger, so when I came back all sorts of uh… messed up; Pop’s let me open a tab.”

     You looked over at Dante, “Oh-- I- I’m sorry, I didn’t--”

     “Don’t worry about it,” he looked over to you, "Vergil and I talked about… things today… As horrible as all of it was… at least we got Nero out of it; so there's a thin silver lining to it."

     "Oh?" you thought for a moment, "I can't imagine you two talking things through," you smiled at the thought, "It really is the best Valentine’s ever."

     "Yeah, it was pretty funny though," Dante laughed to himself, "I made fun of Vergil for making Nero on Valentine’s, which Verge didn't care about but Nero? Fuck- the kid damn near killed me."

     Your voice was laced with heavy sarcasm as you snorted a laugh, "I wonder why."

     The two of you continued towards the park in comfortable silence. As you did, you found yourself wandering in your thoughts. 

     It wasn't often that the two of you went out on a date; demons never sleep which means the hunt is never truly over. When you do get a brief moment of slice and get to go out, you always become hyper-aware of how Dante was leagues above you.

     You always notice how the majority of people check Dante out--some have even asked him out with you right next to him. Dante obviously declined their advances every time by showing you some hardcore PDA. A smile tugged at your lips at the thought; of how Dante is yours and you are his. 

     The two of you entered the park. It was a small nature walk-type place, that doubled as a bird reserve.

     "You know, if I remember correctly" Dante’s eyes creased as he smiled, "our first date was here in the park."

     Your face mimicked his with a large smile, "It was… I'm also pretty sure that we got attacked by some stray demons during that date, too."

     "Ye-p!" Dante laughed and stopped turning to you, "Still the best date of my life."

     Playfully, you hit his chest, "I got tossed around like a sack of potatoes and broke my fuckin arm."

     He moved his hands to the small of your back, "Gave me an excuse to spend more time with you."

     You rolled your eyes and laughed. Your hands found their way to his chest and grabbed his coat gently, "You mean 'mother hen' me for a week?"

     "I did not…"

     "Dante, you tried to join me in the bathroom because you were scared I'd hurt myself…"

     The red devil pouted slightly, "You could've!" he pulled you into a hug.

     "It'll be a cold day in Hell when I need help in the bathroom from being injured," you sighed contently, "besides that part, it was pretty nice… Plus, with me being injured we were alone. Just you and me with the whole shop to ourselves for nearly a week…"

     "Yeah…" Dante began to purr softly, "We have it to ourselves again--for tonight at least."

     You raised a brow, "Vergil staying with Nero?"

     Dante nodded, "Mhm, I asked him to…"

     "You didn't have to," you looked up at him, "but at least now we don't have a curfew…"

     Dante laughed, "Well--" he stopped. You felt his body stiffen and look around. 

     "Dante?" you let go of the hug, thinking that you'd jinxed yourself about being attacked.

     However, all you saw were a few other couples and some birds. It seemed like Dante was staring at one of the couples in particular. Confused, you went to ask him what was up when you heard his throat bubble up a small snarl. 

     "Hey," you grabbed his arm, "everything okay?"

     Dante looked down at you and then back at the couple, "Fucking assholes…"

     “What?” your brow furrowed harshly, “You know them?”

     His lip twitched as he spoke, his gaze not leaving the pair, “No.”

     “Okay-y..?” your grip tightened on his arm, “Then what is it?”

     Dante turned to you, “Kiss me.”

     “... What?”

     “You heard me, kiss me. ”

     Although you were confused, you shrugged and leaned into Dante. Your lover grabbed you with both his hands and pulled you as close as he could. The kiss was as aggressive as it was passionate. The red devil’s lips were burning--damn near literally--and the growling had only intensified. 

     You raised your brow in surprise and made a small gasp as Dante began to lean you back. Seizing the opportunity, he pushed his tongue into your mouth. Only once you were dizzy from lack of air, did Dante break off the kiss. 

     However, he kept you leaning back and had his forehead against yours. His turquoise eyes stared into yours as you noticed one of his ears twitch from the corner of your eye. 

     Whispering, you spoke, “You hear something?”

     With a volume matching yours, Dante nuzzled his nose against yours, “Yeah, don’t worry about it; I made my point…”

     That’s when you looked over to the pair that Dante had been glaring at before; they were leaving. Dante leaned you back up and pulled you into a tight embrace. 

     “What did they say?” you heard his growling begin to turn into purring.

     “Just some fucking stupid shit,” he shook his head and grumbled quietly, “Why does it matter who’s in my bed, huh?”

     “Ah…” you sighed. Although it was always deserved, Dante had gotten into fights with people over them saying homophobic things about the two of you, thankfully tonight he opted for love rather than violence. You turned to look up at him, resting the underside of your chin on his chest, “You know, I wouldn’t mind being in your bed right about now~” you gave him a wink and you felt his chest vibrate as he laughed quietly.

     He looked down at you from the bottom of his eyes, “Good thing the shop’s empty,” Dante let go of the hug and, before you could react, swept you up off your feet; holding you from under the thighs. His voice was barely audible as he leaned into your ear, “cause I’m gonna have you screaming by the end of tonight.”

     Your face turned bright red and with a shaky voice, you whispered back, “Mhm, sure you are; good luck with that, Dante.”

     Dante chuckled darkly at your response, “I won't stop till you do, darlin’. ”

     A shiver ran up your spine, which he noticed and smirked at you. Dante carried you the rest of the way to the shop--totally not speed-walking and excited to get home. 

     Once in the door, all restraint was gone. Dante slammed your back against the wall right inside the doorway and began to make out with you; doing his best to lock the door in the process. Your hands made quick work of his coat, tossing it to the floor, and began to tug at his shirt. He smirked at your eagerness and moved to allow you to take off his fabric confines. 

     A small groan left his lips as you groped at his arms and chest. He moved you two to the desk, placing your back against the wood. Despite your willingness to remove your clothing, Dante decided to rip off your shirt; shredding it to ribbons. Before you could tell him off for ruining another one of your shirts, he moved to bite down on your chest, “Fuck~!” you bit your lip attempting to stifle your moan.

     You arched your back as he bit down harder and harshly grabbed generous handfuls of your ass. Once he was satisfied with the first bite, he moved to bite the other side--biting down even harder. 

     Not expecting him to pierce your flesh, you jerked your hips and pursed your lips to hold back another moan. 

     He released his teeth’s grip on your skin and gently placed kitten licks against the bleeding loving mark. Then he moved to kiss up your neck and whispered in a low husky voice, “You really are gonna play that game, hm?” he tugged your earlobe a bit. 

     “Mhm,” you heard him make a faint growling grumble at your response.

     “Fine, have it your way…” Dante picked you up and took you up to the bedroom. 

     Standing a few feet away, he tossed you on the bed; making you bounce. Dante slid off his boots and yanked your shoes off before pinning you underneath him again, “Sure you wanna play this game, darlin’?” his eyes were emanating a low fiery orange and his pupils were already slits. 

     “You want me to scream, Dante?” you grabbed his arms and looked him dead in the eyes, “ Then make me. ”

     He shifted his jaw to the side while eyeing you up and down before grinning slightly.

     Dante reconnected with your lips and leaned his hips into yours; grinding your matching tents together. Your fingers were pressed against his body as you slid your hands down to his belt. A grumble left your lips as you struggled with his belt buckle; making him chuckle. Dante leaned upward and undid the belt for you. Before you were able to move and get a taste of the devil’s flesh, he grabbed your hands and tied them with his belt.

     “There,” he smirked as you pouted slightly, “Sit still and be a good boy for me..?”

     “Since when do you not want head--” you inhaled sharply as you felt Dante’s burning palm against your clothed cock.

     “Tonight…” with a swift movement he tore your pants from your body, “is all about you,” he kissed your lips gently. 

     His hands massaged the sides of your hips as he slowly slid down to kneel before you.

     “Wait,” you pulled your hips away from him slightly, “Dante--as much as I love you--last time you tried to… you kinda,” you winced at the memory.

     Dante stood up, pursed his lips, and mumbled, “Fair, I don’t wanna make your dick bleed…” 

     “So,” you motioned with your hands, “Allow me..?”

     “No, change of plans,” he picked you up and flipped you onto your stomach.

     “Dante--” you felt his hand gently palm your ass.

     “Hm?” he noticed your sudden apprehension.

     “If… If you’re going to try what I think you are… Can I at least like,” you were beyond embarrassed as you sighed, “like freshen up?”

     You looked over your shoulder and saw him tilt his head slightly, clearly confused. 

     “Just,” you stood up and held your hands out, “please? It’ll only take a minute.”

     “Sure..?” he undid the makeshift restraint, still a bit confused (bless his innocent dumbass).

     With a small smile, you placed a gentle kiss on his cheek and quickly went to wash up in the bathroom. 

     Dante used this small downtime to try and find lube; since he may have tossed it somewhere during your last loving session.

     “Bingo,” Dante bent down and grabbed it from a pile of discarded clothing in the corner. The red devil went over to the bedside table, placing it down for later.

     Hearing you re-enter the room, Dante moved over to you, “So…” he smiled, “You good..?”

     You nodded and pursed your lips, “You sure you’re okay with doing that? I--”

     “Of course I am…” the red devil placed his hands on your shoulders, “It’ll be fun,” he winked.

     With an audible swallow, you nodded, “Okay.” 

     “Now, where were we~?” Dante moved his hands down your body and leaned into you. 

     The two of you exchanged kisses once more. You pulled off his gloves and got Dante to drop his pants; leaving him in his rose-patterned boxers. All the while, the two of you meandered over to the bed. Once there, Dante broke off the kiss and grabbed the belt off the bed. With a smirk, you turned around and placed your hands behind you rather than in front like before; curious to see if he would try it. Which he did; however, you didn’t expect him to tie your forearms together.

     Once you were nice and comfortably tied, Dante picked you up and tossed you face down into the bedding. You trembled as you felt his fingers glide up your back as he leaned over your back. 

     His hot breath tickled your ear as he ground himself lightly against you, “You drive me nuts, you know that?” 

     You smiled as you felt him kiss the nape of your neck, “Do I now?” 

     With his voice barely audible, Dante whispered against your shoulder, “More than anything, sugar,” his sharp teeth bit down into your shoulder as he ground his hips against yours.

     A loud exhale came from your nose as you managed to keep quiet, much to the red devil’s dismay. Slowly, he kissed down your spine; stopping every once in a while to leave a hickey or bite mark. You felt his breath against the small of your back causing you to shiver. 

     He stood up and slid his fingers into your underwear. The red devil bit his lip as he freed you from your final bit of clothing. A sharp gasp left your mouth as he hit your ass with his palm. You shook your head and did your best to stifle any other noises while he harshly groped and played with your ass. 

     Dante grunted a bit, “You really are playing hardball tonight, huh?” you looked over your shoulder at him and he smiled, “Alright, fine…” you saw him open the side table drawer as your breath hitched. 

     The red devil leaned over you and used your tied arms to pull your body upwards. A thick maroon leather collar got wrapped around your neck. Dante smirked as he tightened it enough to give you a small buzz, then loosened it--clasping it shut. A shiver ran up your spine as you heard the click from the leash’s clip being used. 

     “Ass up,” he tugged on the leash, “Now.”. 

     Despite his confident words; Dante’s leash pull was far from anything more than a suggestion. The two of you tried out the collar a few times--which, for the record, was Dante’s idea to try--but every time, he always is too nice… 

     You decided that was going to change tonight, “ No. ”

     Dante froze and squinted at you. He pulled the leash again and this time he pulled hard enough to yank your head back, “Move,” his voice was laced with a small growl, making you quiver with excitement.

     A sly smirk tugged at your lips as you compiled, moving to rest in a downward dog position. 

     “Good boy,” Dante released some tension on the lead and placed a kiss on your ass. 

     His lips were hot as they placed kisses on your lower back and butt. A part of you wanted to beg him to hurry up, but you knew that’s what he was trying to get you to do; so you remained quiet. Dante’s teeth gently grazed your soft flesh as he used his free hand to grab a generous handful of the other cheek. 

     You did your best to relax, even though your body was twitching and aching for attention. A quiet groan left your mouth as you felt him spread your flesh apart. Dante bit his lip and felt a shiver go down his spine. 

     He ran his tongue along your crack, making you lurch forward slightly; which, in turn, made you pull against the leash--making you moan. You could feel Dante smirk at your reaction as he continued his ministrations. His body and mouth were burning hot as he pushed further against your ass. 

     A small grimace found its way to your face as you did your best to stay quiet, but goddamn Dante was making it hard.

     His tongue was moving against two different spots of your rim; courtesy of his two-way split. Along with that, he used his free hand to gently and carefully stroke your cock. Dante moved from your hole to the flesh of your right cheek, giving you a hickey on the sensitive skin.

     Through gritted teeth, you moaned, “Dante, fuck~” 

     You felt his hot breath wash over your ass as he smiled, “Does it feel good?”

     “Yeah,” your voice trembled as you responded, slowly losing your will to stay quiet.

     “Good,” he placed a kiss on the newly formed bruise, “That’s what I want to hear.”

     Dante moved back to your crack as he ran his tongue along it and used his nose as well. His stubble tickled at the skin of your body making you quiver. He returned to his earlier treatment of your needy hole; however, this time, he moved his tongue faster against the sensitive folds. 

     “Ngh,” your breath was heavy as you tried to stay composed, “God~”

     Once satisfied with the results, Dante moved to the left cheek and gave it the same treatment as the other side; leaving a loving mark. 

     He pulled back on the leash, “Up.”

     You sat upwards, sitting on your calves.

     Dante placed kisses along your neck and held your body snug to his; grinding his still-clothed cock against your back. His free hand ghosted around your lower abdomen; not quite reconnecting with your aching dick. You grumbled something too quiet for Dante to hear.

     “Gotta speak up, baby,” he sunk his teeth into a new spot on your neck.

     “Fuck~!” your head leaned back.

     He smirked and proceeded to create another one and then another; enjoying the sounds of his victory. 

     With a jerk of your hips, you let out an unrestrained moan, “Dante, please~”

     “Please what, darlin’?” Dante kissed your jawline.

     “I yield, just,” you felt his cock twitch against your back, “please!”

     “Gotta be more specific baby,” he placed tepid kisses along your bitten-up neck and shoulder.

     “Please, just… fuck me,” your voice was strained and you wriggled against your restraints. 

     He stopped his kisses and you could feel him smile against your skin, “Since you asked so nicely…” A surprised squeak left your lips as he pushed you forwards, putting you back face down into the bed. Dante reached for the bottle of lube he had placed on the side table, opening it. 

     He released his hold on the leash as he moved to take off his final bit of clothing. Quickly, he used his dexterous fingers to stretch you out enough for his cock; seems like he was just as excited as you. 

     “You ready?” Dante grabbed the leash again. 

     You nodded.

     Dante yanked on the leash, “Didn’t quite hear you.”

     “Y-yes s-sir,” you sputtered at the sudden quick squeeze from the leather on your throat.

     “Good boy…”

     The red devil bit his lip as he positioned his dick with your entrance, teasing you with his tip.

     After a minute, you broke, “Please, Dante,” you desperately groaned, “fuck me- I need you.”

     He let out a low breathy chuckle. Seeing you so desperate for him made him want to annihilate your body; to shove himself inside you, taking him all the way down to the hilt, and watch you struggle to adjust. Dante bit his lip at the thought as he grabbed your hips tightly. A strangled snarl left his lips as he fought the urge to ram you and slowly inched his way inside your hole. 

     You groaned at the feeling of his thick cock stretching your insides. This part was always the hardest; between trying to take him in and having to wait for your body to adjust, it was excruciating. Getting impatient, Dante pushed the remaining few inches inside you.

     “Fuck-!” you gritted your teeth and let out a shaky breath, “Dante, just…” your breath was heavy, “give me a minute…”

     He bit his lip and spoke with a low husky growl, “Yeah…” his breath was heavy as he fought with himself to stay composed.

     After a minute, you rocked your hips back into Dante’s. The red devil smiled as he moved in slow short increments before pulling out to the tip and slamming back into your hips; jolting you forward slightly.

     You gave a sputtering moan in response; which only encouraged him to do it again. Dante’s pace was hard and fast, pushing you forward with every brutal thrust of his hips. Trying to keep yourself at a respectable volume, you buried your face into the bedding; which Dante did not like. He yanked on the leash making you arch your head upwards, allowing him to hear every sound you made. 

     With a distorted growl of a voice, Dante smugly commented, “I want to hear you submit."

     A shiver ran down your spine at the sound of his voice; knowing exactly what that tone means. As quick as the thought came, it disappeared at him changing his pattern. His movement became short and hard, you knew Dante was getting close. 

     "Dante," you groaned and he pulled you up by the leash and your arms, making you sit on his lap, "Ngh~ Dante, please," you ground your hips against him, making him groan in return.

     His mouth gently placed kisses along your neck and shoulders as he picked up the pace again. Dante held you by your restrained arms and leaned you forward a bit. You jerked your hips as he managed to hit what he was aiming for--your prostate. 

     He released the leash and leaned forwards into you, keeping his dick at the right angle. A warm calloused hand found its way to your dick and began to gently stroke your cock, using your precum as a lubricant.

     You knocked your head back into his shoulder as he wrapped his other arm around your middle, holding you close, “Ah, Dante~” you felt him sink his teeth into your shoulder once more, “Please~” 

     All you got in response was an unintelligible growl. 

     After a few more uneven thrusts, Dante came inside your ass, “Fuck~!” your legs and hips twitched as you orgasmed.

      With slow movements, he rode out both of your climaxes and released his bite. His breathing was uneven as he laid his head against the side of yours, saying various forms of “I love you”. 

     Once you stopped twitching, Dante removed his cock and let go of your arms; allowing you to lay back down. You felt him undo the belt on your arms allowing you to move them, finally.

     Dante helped turn you over and laid atop you and unclipped the leash--tossing it to the side. He was purring slightly; however, you noticed an odd feeling down towards your hips. 

     Your voice was hoarse as you spoke, “Dante..?”

     “Hm,” he nuzzled his face into your chest, his skin still hot as burning coals. 

     A shaky breath left your lips as you swallowed nervously, “You’re still hard?”

     Dante moved his head to look you in the eyes, which you noticed were still his Devil Trigger color, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll take care of it.”

     You weakly groped at his biceps, “I can go another round; it is Valentine’s after all…”

     This comment made Dante move to prop himself up on his palms that were placed on each side of you, “You… you sure? I don’t want to overdo… you .”

     A soft smile tugged at your lips, “Of course, devil-boy,” you winked, “show me what you’ve got.”

     Dante sloppily kissed your lips as your hands moved from his arms to his hair. You knew that playing with his hair was a surefire way to get him riled up and today was no exception. 

     Your lover broke off the kiss and stared you in the eyes, “Last chance, babe. I won’t hold it--”

     Lovingly you pulled his hair, making his lip twitch with a growl. 

     He sat upright on his knees and allowed himself to let go. Seeing him trigger was always a treat, the bright red flash and the sudden increase in heat is as arousing as it is terrifying. You stared at him with your lips parted slightly and reached to run your hands along his middle; eyeing him slowly down to his exposed grey and orange cock. 

     The red devil leaned back over you, “Like what you see?” he smiled, revealing his sharpened teeth and spreading his wings out; boasting confidently. 

     You bit your lip and ran your hand slowly back up to the sides of his neck, “Mmn, yeah…”

     He pushed your jaw up with his head and kissed along your throat as his hands slowly ran down your sides, kneading into your skin. 

     With a voice barely audible, you whispered, “I love you, Dante…”

     A small laugh left the devil’s lips as he moved back to look at you, “I love you, too,” you jerked your hips at the feeling of his hand around your cock, “my little cock-whore.”

     You rocked your hips against him, “Only for you--” you gasped as Dante yanked your legs upwards, allowing them to rest on his hips.

     Dante leaned back fully and looked you over. He then removed his hand from your cock and placed it on his own, stroking himself slightly while looking at you.

     Once more you buckled your hips, “Please?”

     His stare was heavy as he looked at your face and, without breaking eye contact, he moved his tip to your hole. The red devil’s cum from earlier acted as lube as he pushed his tip inside you.

     A sudden sharp gasping moan left your lips as you felt him shove all 10 ½ inches inside. Your back arched and your mind was reeling at the feeling. Dante grinned widely as he watched your reaction and began to move without waiting. 

     It didn’t take long for Dante to reach the same brutal pace as before; making your ass squelch from the cum already inside you. Your mind was blank as all you could do was moan and speak unintelligible gibberish at the feeling. He decided to take this up a notch. Dante grabbed your hips and picked you up; moving to a standing position.

     “Dante,” you grabbed at his body; wrapping your arms around his neck and shoulders, groaning at the hot leathery skin.

     The red devil growled feeling your wrap yourself around him. His wings wrapped around you, holding your body closer still. It was pure nirvana. All you wanted to do was feel him more, to be made his. 

     Dante’s thrusts became animalistic as he fucked up into you, hiking you up slightly with each move. He began to tease you with his knot, slowly pushing it further each time; you knew he was getting close. With the little bit of strength you had left in your body, you used one hand to reach up and grab one of the large black horns on his head. 

     That pushed him over the edge; he used his hands to shove your hips down onto his cock and forced his knot inside you. You shouted as your body jerked at the feeling; followed by your head leaning back limply, your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

     The red devil let out a loud roar of a climax and pierced your hips with his claws, gripping them ever-tighter. A small whimper left Dante’s lips as he felt your muscles constrict his cock.

     Despite him still being buried to the hilt, cum had already begun to drip from your ass and to the floor. You carefully placed your forehead against his and placed both your palms on his chest, feeling the rumble of his breathing. The two of you shared a gentle kiss--one without lust or need, but rather, one of pure love. 

     A few minutes passed as you felt him slowly begin to slide out of your body. Dante slowly de-triggered; starting with his head and torso and ending with the furthest things from his body. 

     Your hips involuntarily jerked at the feeling of his wings no longer supporting you and the feeling of his cock finally leaving you. Dante moved his hands to grab onto you better, “Easy, easy; I’ve got you,” he moved you back to the bed and laid you down gently. 

     A small pang of pride touched his heart as he saw how submissive he had made you and removed the long-forgotten collar around your neck. With a small sweet kiss on your cheek, Dante whispered, “I’ll be right back for you, okay?” with that, he left the room to go draw a bath. 

     Admittedly, right now you were pretty out of it so his words didn’t even register. Your blinking had slowed to the point of you being on the verge of a nap when he returned. 

     He smiled at the sight, “Let’s get you cleaned up,” he picked you up, which pulled you right out of your sleepy state and made you hiss in slight pain, “Sorry,” Dante placed a kiss on your forehead.

     The water was warm as he set you down in the tub. He joined you in the water and you gave him a meek smile as you tried desperately to stay awake. Noticing this, Dante grabbed one of your hands, “You can nap, darlin’. I’ll take care of you,” he didn’t have to tell you twice as you drifted to sleep.

     When he finished cleaning your body and tending to some of the more intense love marks he left; Dante picked you up once more; this time, he picked you up bridal style. Just like before, you woke up. 

     The red devil didn’t seem to notice; however, so you reached up to his face and palmed it gently. He smiled and leaned into your touch. Carefully, he set you down in bed and, after turning off the lights, joined you underneath the sheets.

     Although you were exhausted, you managed to wriggle yourself closer to him. The two of you were laying face to face; or rather, face to chest. You looked up at Dante, “I love you,” you sighed and closed your eyes, “so, so much, Dante…”

     He chuckled and wrapped his arms around you, purring with pure happiness, “I love you, too… Happy Valentine’s baby…”

==

Ending Notes: 💟Holy crap that was long. Admittedly, this would've been done yesterday but I was having a really bad day; so this kinda thing was not a good idea to write. 💟Please let me know if y'all liked this; I am still working on improving my smut writing skills, so any feedback would be great!! 💟Also, enjoy this happy story because the next ones (which are like 99% Vergil-related) are angst mixed with other things.

==

Want to see more like this? Want to read my work quicker and several stories that are not on Tumblr? Check this out on my AO3 (Linked here)

MASTER LIST FOR TUMBLR

#dante devil may cry #devil may cry #dante x reader #dante x male reader #male reader #smut #minors dni #dante is cute #valentines day #better late than never #oneshot #but a long oneshot #reposted from my AO3 #spicy #Dante sparda x reader #idk why tf people use sparda as their last name #but okay #devil may cry fanfiction #fan fiction #reader insert #fan fic #AO3 fan fic #AO3 fanfic #i tried #gay #homosexual #Dante has the big gay

[cringecompanionapologist]

Balloon Debate: WTF Is Even This Short Trip?

So, here I am following up on Balloon Debate. It's time to discuss exactly wtf happens in this thing.

I'll include a cut for Spoilers because I'm going to spoil the whole damn thing.

I'll explain the Basic Premise for anyone who hasn't read my previous posts about it. Balloon Debate is a Short Trip in which Sarah Jane writes a little story in universe about some weird interdimensional disaster where the televised companions of the first 7 Doctors all end up in the TARDIS together at the same time. This causes the TARDIS to go all screwy and start getting smaller on the inside. K9, who serves the role of Exposition Bot, reports that the life support will soon only be enough to sustain six passengers. Since a TARDIS is meant to be piloted by six people, this makes sense. As a robot, K9 doesn't need oxygen, so he doesn't count. But, the only way for any of the companions to survive for long enough to help the Doctor/escape the TARDIS, is to throw a few rooms into the vortex with most of the passengers as well.

The vast majority of companions immediately accept that people are gonna die and that the goal is to make it be not them. The only one to immediately protest this is Adric.

And of course he gets picked on for wanting to find a better solution to the problem, because he is Adric and this was written in 2003.

So, while Adric messes around with the console in an attempt to save everyone's lives, it's decided that everyone will take a turn arguing why they should be among the six survivors. Everyone is also a dick to Mel.

So, if you're too negative or positive, we hate you. Got it.

Look, this blog is called Cringe Companion Apologist for a reason. I'm always going to complain about unpopular companions being treated unfairly. This story has a lot of that.

Anyway, the debate begins. They go in alphabetical order, so Ace makes her argument first.

Adric's turn doesn't go very well for him, since he's still trying to save everyone's collective asses. He's taking a while, so Turlough gets impatient, but at least he believes in him.

Adric tries something and the console zaps him. He dies. Because he's Adric.

Since Tegan appears to know Turlough, that means she's from a point in her timeline where she's seen Adric die before. You'd think she, and possibly Nyssa, would have some sort of reaction to this, but no one really does and the debate goes on.

I'm not going to throw in a screenshot of every argument because that's too many screenshots. From here on out, I'll only include ones that I can't easily sum up by myself. Most arguments amount to "I'm a badass" or "I'm a genius". Barbara's is one of the more unique.

While most companions make arguments about why they shouldn't die, there are a few other types of argument. Ben just wants to go where Polly goes, Polly goes where Ben goes, and Ian goes where Barbara goes. I'm skipping around here because of how similar their arguments are. None of them are very complicated.

Dodo is the first of many "I know I'm totally fucked but" arguments.

Out of the companions that are often treated poorly, unlike with Adric and Mel, this story is actually pretty kind to Dodo.

Harry offers to sacrifice himself for one of the ladies.

Inspired by Harry's willingness to die, Leela speaks out of turn, skipping several people, to declare her willingness to die a warrior's death.

Jamie is also ready to die, because he's spent quite a while being willing to die for the people he's loyal to.

It's sweet that Zoe is invested in someone other than her surviving. Will Ian/Barbara and Ben/Polly are couples who will Live Together or Die Together, Jamie and Zoe come across as just good friends who care about each other.

Then it's Jo's turn to be bullied make her case. Sarah Jane is more special than her and Liz is smarter. A lot of drama with Three's companions here.

This would be Mel's turn if everyone wasn't awful.

At least Nyssa feels bad about it. She wins the Good Person Award for this. She also decides that, though she's got science knowledge, other people would be better than her and she's already outlived the rest of her species, so she's ready to go. She'd be useful in keeping the rest of the survivors from killing each other, but okay.

Peri is another unpopular companion who's treated at least decently. She's too young to die, but she knows that she doesn't have many useful skills. There really isn't much for her to say.

The Romanas make their argument together, though they're aware that There Can Be Only One. Then Romana I completely screws over Romana II.

Since Sarah Jane is the one writing this story, it's sort of a given that she'll be one of the survivors. Whatever her argument is, it's really not important. She just kinda wants to be a companion again and is really motivated.

Steven is willing to sacrifice himself as long as someone takes care of Hi-Fi, the stuffed panda who was his only friend during two years of solitary confinement. Nobody volunteers to look after the panda because they're all terrible people.

You'd think Susan would be obvious, but Romana I pulls a "where's the birth certificate" on her.

Again. Terrible People.

Tegan's argument is slightly interrupted by Turlough.

Turlough, meanwhile, is still with Adric, wondering why they don't try to find a less lethal solution. But he sulks, so we're supposed to not like him.

I will admit that Turlough seems in-character here, at the very least.

Vicki sees herself as Not Susan and if Susan isn't surviving this, she knows she's not. Because Ian and Barbara were clearly traveling with Susan and hadn't met her yet, Steven is the supportive co-companion.

Victoria has nothing to appeal to except pity. This somehow works better than when anyone else does it.

Lastly, Zoe has some simple, logical arguments.

So, we don't know how voting worked or who voted for who, but the winners are Harry, Liz, Romana I, Sarah Jane, Victoria, and Zoe. We're treated to the last moments of everyone else.

Honestly, if Peri and approached either Turlough or Jamie and insisted, they probably would've comforted her. Jamie would be a gentleman and Turlough would probably want to be comforted too, but would never admit it. So, they died as they lived: confused, miserable, and annoyed with Mel.

You might be wondering why Harry didn't take the place of one of the women like he said he would. Once it's revealed that this is a story Sarah Jane is writing for her own amusement, she admits that it was out-of-character for him not to do that.

To sum up the rest of the story, they took too long debated and the TARDIS has decided that There Can Be Only Two now, leaving Sarah Jane and Victoria. K9 gets a message from the Doctor (somehow) that he's gone to another dimension, can never return, knew he could only take one companion, and he chose Victoria. The Victoria in the TARDIS is actually Kamelion and K9 shoots him. Sarah Jane seems to think it makes sense that Victoria would be the chosen companion, though I still don't get it.

Sarah Jane had writer's block and she wrote this just to get out of it and it was never meant to be seen by Man. She never met most of the companions she was writing about and wrote them based on...stories she heard about them, or something.

The answer to the WTF Is Wrong with Everybody question is unknown to this very day.

#balloon debate #too many companions i don't wanna tag them all again #i'll tag the six survivors i guess #sarah jane smith #victoria waterfield #zoe heriot #harry sullivan #liz shaw #romana i #everyone's a dick to mel #turlough was right and did nothing wrong #everyone's a dick to adric but at least turlough believed in him #romana i screwed over her fellow time lords to get her spot #justice for susan #wtf even is this story #this post is long because wow