#rip rest in prongs

[quail-in-red]

hello new followers, thank you for liking my emo stag skeleton! i enjoy drawing the occasional scary art but fair warning i mostly draw nonsense and shenanigans

#hp fanart #my art #rip rest in prongs

[ellecdc]

💰jingle jingle💰

how much for you to continue the barty shirt fic where they make it up to the tower and tell the marauders🤭

I'll give you this one for free but the rest will cost you

Barty Crouch Jr x potter!reader who tattles on Jegulus

CW: making fun of only children, siblings insulting one another, platonic Prongsfoot drama, no real angst - just chaos Continuation of this one shot

The trek from the Slytherin dungeons up the Gryffindor tower in a full sprint was unideal for even the most athletic and fit quidditch player in the castle; but if there was one thing a lifetime worth of living with James Potter and his pranking ways prepared you for, it was running.

Fortunately for you, this was not a universal experience and you were quickly able to leave Regulus and Barty well enough behind you.

You screamed the password at the Fat Lady who shrieked in fear when she saw you barrelling towards her causing her to open so quickly that the portrait thwacked against the stone walls and you all but dived into the common room. 

You stood up straight as your chest burned to survey the patrons of the common room only to find that the entire common room was already doing the same to you.

“Circe’s tits, Potter.” Lily said with a smirk. “You look like you were trying to outrun Peeves.”

Your smile turned devious as you continued panting. “Better.” You answered quickly, turning your sights towards your brother, Peter, Remus, and…

“Sirius!” You greeted as you speed-walked over to their sofas.

“Hey Trouble; get tired of the snakes?” Sirius teased as he moved a chess piece with an air of nonchalance.

You were eager to change that.

Before you could open your mouth, two Slytherin’s came spilling into the common room before the portrait had a chance to close behind them.

“I’m so glad you could join me for this.” You taunted Regulus who’s jaw tightened as he straightened himself up and shook Barty’s hand off his shoulder.

“Isn’t this a nice shirt, Siri?”

Sirius looked up at that as he considered your form. “Yeah, actually; that’s designer, right?”

You look down at it with a smirk when you heard Regulus whisper a cautionary, “Potter.”

“I’m not sure…it’s got a little crown on the sleeve.” You explained innocently.

Sirius’ eyebrows widened at that. “Shit. Yeah those are super expensive; but great quality and super soft. Great choice, Junior.”

“Thank you!” Barty accepted eagerly. “See Treasure? Black gets it.”

You smirked as you looked over at James who you could see by now was clearly sweating. “Right…but I actually stole this from Jamie’s trunk.”

James’ eyes shot to Regulus as yours moved back to Sirius who was staring at you bemusedly.

“That is not Prongs’ shirt, and didn’t Junior just admit it was his?”

“Nope.” Barty answered with a pop of the p. “I admitted buying it.”

“Why are you buying clothes for James?” Remus asked cautiously then, eyes darting nervously between your mischievous form, James’ anxious form, Regulus’ tense form, and Sirius’ confused form.

“Oh, I’d never buy clothes for that Potter.” Barty scoffed. “That shirt was Reggie’s birthday present last year.”

The sound of Peter’s hand slapping against his mouth as he stared at you all wide eyed was the only sound in the entire common room.

Remus was holding his book in front of his face like a shield as he watched the spectacle that was his friend group.

Finally, Lily let out a long suffering sigh. “Potter, you might want to take this chance to get a head start.”

“Right.” James agreed quickly as he took off towards the portrait hole, pausing as he passed Regulus, seeming to decide since he was already going to die tonight, he may as well go big or go home.

He paused long enough to pull Regulus into a searing kiss before ripping away from him and taking off out of the common room.

The room continued to sit silently as everyone digested what they just saw.

“Did we seriously lose both Potter’s to Slytherin’s?” Marlene asked finally, causing Regulus to scoff.

“Like you’ve got a leg to stand on here, McKinnon.”

“At least I’m not fucking my brother’s best friend!” She volleyed back, causing Sirius to let out a dramatic gagging sound.

“You lot really need to spend less time worrying about who your siblings are shagging.” Peter said with an air of finality.

“Thank you!” You and Regulus chorused, causing you to glare at one another.

“You’re taking this rather well, Pads.” Remus chuckled, tapping Sirius’ knee with his book as Sirius continued staring unseeingly at the portrait hole.

“Mhm.”

Remus and Peter exchanged a worried glance. “What are you waiting for?” Peter asked finally.

“James will get lonely when he realizes no one is chasing him.” He replied in monotone. “He’ll be back in a few.”

“Sirius, please be cool about this; I’m happy, alright?” Regulus sighed in exasperation.

Sirius’ eyes flit over to his younger brother as his brows furrowed. “Listen, am I particularly pleased about…this? No. But that’s not what I’m going to kill him for.”

“What are you going to kill him for?” You inquired, wondering if it was worth writing home to your parents about.

The second your sentence finished, James cautiously stepped back through the portrait hole to find the common room in much the same state as he’d left it.

Suddenly, Sirius stood from his spot on the sofa. “ALL THOSE TIMES YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE TOO BUSY TUTORING TO PRANK WITH ME, YOU WERE DITCHING ME FOR MY BROTHER!?”

The room collectively grimaced as they looked over at James. 

“Listen mate, it’s not what it looks like.” James pleaded, earning him a scoff from his best friend.

“It isn’t what it looks like!? Because the way it looks to me is that you lied, and you kepy secrets! You know, there was a point in this relationship that trust and honesty meant something!” Sirius shouted back.

“It does!” James offered quickly. “It does, Pads! Swear it!”

“Right, forgive me, but your word means nothing to me right now.” He spat as he went storming up towards their shared dorm, James quickly following behind.

“Please don’t shut me out like this; you’re still my other half!”

But the rest of the argument performance was silenced when the door to their room shut behind them.

“Well, Regulus.” Remus sighed with a tired smile. “Welcome to the family; our boyfriend’s are each other’s boyfriends, and this happens every three days.”

“Salazar’s fucking balls.” Regulus groaned as he threw his head back. “This is why I didn’t want it going public.”

“Oi!” You shouted as you lobbed a throw pillow at your new future brother-in-law. “If you’re going to love my brother, love him with your whole chest, coward!”

“You take that back.” He hissed at you.

“I’ll do no such thing.”

“I…I don’t know what to do…should…should we get a professor? What’s happening?” Barty started, looking around the Gryffindor common room with a look of panic on his face.

“Oh, relax, Junior. Your only child is showing.” Remus sighed as he pulled his book back out.

“Aren’t you an only child, Lupin?”

“Yup.” Remus responded as he turned a page of his book. “But I’ve lived in the same tower as the Potters for seven years, and dealt with Sirius and Regulus for the past two; you pick up a few things. Things like this-” he explained as he pointed towards you and Regulus who were still throwing insults back and forth. “Is what siblings call bonding.”

Lily chuckled as Marlene, Barty, Peter, and Remus watched as you called Regulus a ��spoiled rotten toerag” to which he replied that “even listening to your voice made him feel like he was losing brain cells”.

“Siblings are weird.” Barty decided.

#marauders era #marauders au #marauders fanfiction #reader insert #self insert #barty gate #barty crouch junior #barty crouch jr #barty #slytherin skittles #the slytherin skittles #barty crouch jr imagine #barty crouch jr x reader #barty crouch jr x you #fluff #comedy #siblings #ellecdc fics

[scarlettohairdye]

Home Ownership Was a Mistake

This is for @trickybonmot, who may or may not use some of these stories in a fic.

Okay. So.

In the year of our lord 2010, my wife and I were lucky enough to be gifted $20k by my parents, which in those days (given it was a historically low point for real estate prices in Seattle) was enough for a down payment on a house. It was an astounding confluence of luck and privilege that led to us being homeowners, because if they gave us the same money now it would go precisely nowhere.

Anyway, it was not enough money for a large house, or a fancy house. We looked at a lot of places, only some of which were move-in ready (and one of which was absolutely just a tear-down) and eventually settled on our current place, which is a 1910 bungalow with a detached garage that was finished and turned into a studio.

Was it the most aesthetically pleasing house when we bought it? No. The walls were white, the carpet was light beige, and the paint had seen better days. That said, it was move-in ready and the owner was pretty desperate to sell, so we took it!

The inspector let us know that some of the wiring was still the old knob-and-tube, so we'd want that updated sooner rather than later, but it looked pretty good. About half the outlets were grounded, so it didn't stop us from plugging in three-prong appliances. We just had to use more extension cords than maybe we'd prefer.

The Electrical

The first big house thing we paid for was to have the entire place rewired. Our circuit breaker was a mystery, we didn't have enough outlets, and we were tired of being stuck with specific layouts of our stuff due to the lack of grounded outlets. We were expecting about half the wiring to be up to code, and the rest would need an update.

Spoiler alert: HAHAHAHAHAHA.

The rewiring took about a week, and every morning the electrician sat down with us and told us what new fire trap he'd uncovered.

"Yeah, so the knob and tube wiring going to the lights in the ceiling? Knob and tube gets hot when it's running, and yours is under three layers of insulation."

"You know how you thought your outlets were grounded? They weren't, actually, the ground wire just went elsewhere into the house and wasn't connected to anything."

"So there's wiring in your crawlspace? Whoever put that in nailed some sheets of wood paneling over it, so we had to rip the wood paneling out to access it."

I think the job was about $15k when it was done, we had many many more outlets, and our house was no longer one bad day from lighting itself on fire. Victory, I guess?

The Studio Window

This was leaking a bit, and we knew it was leaking when we moved in. (South facing walls get all the weather in our region.) We were not handy enough to replace it ourselves at the time and we also didn't have money because I got laid off shortly after we bought the house and was making my living doing costume commissions. Solution: Trade costuming work to an acquaintance who did carpentry.

The window, we discovered, was not so much a finished window as it was a single sheet of glass sandwiched between some boards.

Badly.

The carpenter was not entirely she that she was qualified for the job, but she did manage to remove the single sheet of glass and replace it with a window that was insulated and actually capable of opening. She used caulk around it. It was way better than we had before. Maybe someday we'll have both studio windows replaced by a contractor who actually does windows, but this is not that day!

The Siding

The cedar shingles were no longer cutting it at a certain point, so we had the house resided. (Houses are money pits, in case you didn't know.) This was a $30k job (MONEY PIT!) and had several layers of badness.

Bad: Our house had no insulation. It was cedar shingles over the original siding, with nothing in between that original siding and our INTERIOR WALLS. There was occasionally a newspaper. Our PM asked if we wanted insulation? And we said yes, please!!! We did not have a lot of time to think about insulation or research the best type, so it's just sheets of the pink fiberglass stuff in there, but it exists and we have it now!

Worse: Underneath our laundry room was a horrorshow. The laundry room is an addition that was added to our house probably sometime in the 50s? And, uh...

Well, the siding guys pulled off the siding, took a look at what was under it, and immediately called the project manager. The project manager came out, took a look, and then called us. He said that the siding guys thought it really needed to be reinforced and stabilized before they re-sided it, which is very fair, because I think the people who built it originally were drunk when they did it. It was a fucking Wild West cowboy construction situation under there.

Yes, you heard that right: A LOAD-BEARING SHINGLE.

Our project manager also informed us that the siding guys couldn't do the reinforcement, because they're just siding guys. They don't do structural. This is very fair.

It also needed to be done by Monday so we could stay on schedule for the siding work.

We learned this on Friday.

I immediately called my general contractor dad and got his voicemail, because (I remembered belatedly) he was in Mexico getting dental surgery. There was absolutely no way we could get another contractor out to do the work over a single weekend.

It was up to us.

My wife and I (mostly my wife) went HAM on it. We rented big jacks from the tool library to prop the laundry room up while we replaced one of the entirely rotten support poles. One of the big telephone poles was so wrecked with dry rot we could kick it out of place. (It didn't even touch the BIG ROCK that was supposed to be its foundation!!! It was floating!!!) Several of the joists were also fucked, so we ran new joists alongside them and married them together. My wife dug holes while crouched in a 4' high space, filled the holes with gravel, compacted it by putting a piece of wood on top of it and hitting it with a mallet, and then installed an entire additional support system from 4x4s and deck blocks. She actually attached the support system TO THE FUCKING HOUSE, which was a big improvement from the way it was originally held on by vibes and paint.

Here's a tasty little before and after:

(Yeah, see how that visible joist at the front just... stops at the far left? There's a new joist right behind it now.)

This was completed with resounding cries of, "Good enough!" and "It's better than it was before!" The siding guys thought it was fine and sided over it. Someday hopefully we will be able to afford to tear the whole thing down and rebuild it with a properly poured foundation, but in the meantime the spin cycle on the washing machine no longer shakes the whole house. Victory?!

Ridiculous: The purple paint saga. My wife and I are lesbians who tend toward maximalism in our decoration style. Construction companies find this baffling. We paid extra to our siding company to get the extended color choices (if you order the siding with the color baked in it lasts longer, but you're limited to a particular range of colors) and spoiler alert: 90% of them are boring as fuck. We basically paid extra to have access to 400 shades of white and 400 more shades of beige. There were like three saturated colors in the whole book. Pathetic.

Anyway, we chose the one nice teal that was available and decided we'd paint the door purple, since all the purple colors were gray at best. The project manager then forgot to put in our order, and when he remembered he'd forgotten, ordering our siding through his company would have pushed back the start time by six weeks. We could still make the original start time if we ordered through a different company doing the same thing, though!

Me, immediately: And we wouldn't be restricted to your color palette, right? Him: Yeah, they can do custom colors. Me, slapping down a color card called "Fully Purple": MAKE IT PURPLE.

Bless this man, he went to the siding company and asked for Fully Purple. They told him they couldn't do that color, and also is he sure anyone wants this color? He called them on the phone and informed them yes, we did want that color, and also that he'd worked for them and he knew damn well they could do that color, they'd just have to custom mix it, so they needed to do their fucking jobs. Suitably chastened, they finally sent us a sample of the siding, and it was... okay. It was purple for sure, but a little de-saturated. Not the purple of our hearts.

I asked if they'd actually started manufacturing our siding yet or just sent the color sample. The project manager confirmed they hadn't, and if we ordered this imperfectly-purple siding now, it would be several weeks before we could get started.

"We're gonna paint," I decided, and our project manager put in the orders.

The paint store called him and said, "Hey, are you sure you want this color?" Yes, he assured them, that's the right color.

The guys doing the painting opened up the can and then called him and said, "Are you sure this color?" and he told them yes! They want that color!

At this point I told him he should just start responding with, "They're lesbians!!! Yes! They want the purple! They're lesbians!!!"

Eventually we cleared every hurdle god and the construction industry put in front of us, and now our house is Fully Purple.

It also has insulation, wiring that won't kill us, and a laundry room that hopefully won't collapse anytime soon. We got a heat pump installed that took shockingly little time and worked immediately, and our next project will be having the roof redone. Check back in to find out what fresh horror awaits us then! I think it'll be a second roof under our existing roof made of lead and asbestos tiles, probably!

#home improvement #it's a nightmare #choices were made #they were bad

[stellamancer]

gifts and promises (satoru gojo x reader)

notes: this is actually the full version of a series of blurbs i left on @shotorus's decotree for Christmas that i actually did not finish initially. uh. what else to say. i'll try and write bkg after i wake from a nap lmao. i hope everyone who celebrates is having a nice christmas!

wc: 1.2k

contains: gender neutral reader, mentions of food, eating and feeding other people, finger sucking

"Ta-da!" Gojo exclaims, holding up the cake box in his hand like it's treasure.

You stare at him blankly. "I thought you were bringing fried chicken."

"I said I was bringing Christmas food. So I got a cake."

You shake your head. To be honest, you’re not surprised, but you are a little disappointed. "No, Christmas food is chicken. you know, from KFC."

Gojo pouts as he sets down the cake box and opens it up. It’s a Christmas cake through and through— covered in whipped pure white topping with plump, red strawberries adorning the top. Nestled amongst the cream and berries is a little Santa shaped cookie with a little chocolate placard with the words ‘Merry Christmas’ written across it in elegant letters. You’ve seen this cake before— in the display case of one of the most expensive patisseries in Tokyo. Leave it to Gojo to buy an expensive Christmas cake. . "So you don't want any?"

"It's not that,” you say, watching as he grabs a fork and only a fork, which makes his intentions clear in your eyes. “It's that you're bad at sharing cake."

"Not true. I plan to share it with you!"

"Do you?"

He grins and suddenly you realize that you might have mistaken his intentions entirely. This is not good.

"Come on," Gojo nearly sings, carelessly scooping some cake with the fork and presenting it to you. "Say 'ah~'"

You eye it warily, the bite of cake that he's got just for you sitting daintily on the prongs. your gaze shifts toward Gojo and you look him dead in the eye as you respond. "No."

If that were enough to deter him then you'd never ask Santa for a gift ever again.

But it's not.

He merely pushes the fork closer to you, still grinning and you watch as some of the whipped topping oozes down the side of the bite. Wait too long and it'll make a mess.

It's only one bite, so you suppose you'll swallow your pride along with the cake and call it a gift for the most annoying man on earth.

You lean forward and take the bite, making sure to look as slovenly as possible. It doesn't matter; Gojo is elated.

Wanting to stifle the gloating that's sure to come, you swipe one of the strawberries from the top of the cake and nearly shove it into his mouth, pressing the tip to his lips.

"Your turn," you hiss.

The fork, still in Gojo's grasp, slips between his fingers and clatters onto the table. The room goes completely silent, but you barely notice as Gojo's gaze is trained on you, his speechlessness a gift to the universe.

It's at this moment that you realize the gravity of what you're doing— what you’ve done. You'd acted without thinking, only wanting to shut him up but to him and the world at large, it looks like you're feeding him too.

Alarmed, you try to pull your hand back, but his fingers wrap tightly around your wrist as he takes the strawberry from you, lips brushing against your fingertips, his eyes still fixed on you.

This is too much.

Your brain goes offline and instinct automatically takes over— instinct being to just shove your fingers in his mouth.

It does not make things any better.

Gojo moans around your fingers and you are overcome with the intense and violent desire to take the rest of the cake and shove it in his face.

You don't.

Instead, you rip your hand from his grasp, and, without a word, stomp off to the bathroom to wash his icky germs off your hands. You scrub and scrub but you can't seem to rid yourself of the feeling of his tongue brushing against the pads of your fingers.

This is terrible, absolutely terrible.

Finally, you give up and exit the bathroom, only to find one Satoru Gojo waiting outside. When your eyes meet, he grins, triumphant.

"Did you have to..." you trail off; you don’t want to say it aloud.

"No, but I thought it'd be fun," he answers with a cheeky grin.

"I hope you know that I hate you."

"You don't mean that," Gojo laughs.

"Oh, but I do."

It's obvious Gojo doesn't believe you. That's fine. You don't care. You don't need him to.

You start to walk past him when he speaks up again, but this time his voice is oddly soft. "Hey, wait."

"What?" you glance back at him and for once, he's not looking at you, but at the ceiling. It’s odd; he looks almost shy in a boyish sort of way. It’s almost kind of… "What is it?"

Gojo's hands reach into his pockets and they shift around before pulling out a small package that fits in the palm of his hand. your eyes widen. it looks like—

"...is that for me?" you ask dumbly.

"Who else would it be for?" Gojo responds and you're not sure if he sounds teasing or indignant.

You stare at him. "I... uh... but I didn't..."

He shrugs, and grins, looking back to normal. "Don't worry about it. Just bought it on a whim."

Something in you is doubtful. You don’t think about it. Gingerly, you take the gift from Gojo and he stares at you, looking expectant. Suppose it’s only correct to open it here in front of him. You tear apart the wrapping paper and beneath is what looks like a vacuum packed black disc.

“...uh thanks?” What the hell did he even give you?

Gojo laughs and you think he realizes your confusion. Possibly even revels in it. He lifts a hand and draws a line in the air with his finger— he’s manipulating his cursed energy to cut the packing around the black disc. It puffs up immediately and you can’t help but stare. It looks less like a ball and more like a palm sized Satoru Gojo plush ball.

“What the hell is this?”

“It’s a stress ball.” Gojo explains. “Thought you might need one since you’re always so agitated.”

A sudden violent urge pulses through you and reflexively you squeeze tightly at the ball in your hand. Obviously pleased, Gojo grins.

“See! You’re using it already! I knew it would be a good gift!”

As much as you want to hurl the ball right at his stupid face, you restrain yourself. No matter who or what it is, it’s not polite to throw someone’s present back at them. Especially since you know he didn’t just buy this on a whim.

Through gritted teeth, you say, “Well, thanks…”

And then your expression shifts, schooling itself into something more somber when you realize. “...I don’t have anything for you, though.”

Gojo tilts his head and shrugs. “It’s fine. I don’t need anything.”

You frown. There’s little doubt in your mind that Gojo could have a need for anything, when it feels like he has the entire world at his fingertips, but—

“But,” he says slowly. “If you’re asking about what I might want, then just promise to get me something next year.”

There is something about the sound of his voice, a grander meaning interwoven in the promise he’s asking you to make. He’s asking you about next year, about the future, when you live a life where you cannot even promise tomorrow. Gojo knows that, and yet he’s asking, he’s wanting and—

“...I guess I can get you something,” you mumble softly.

He laughs and you wonder if he thinks that the promise is a gift in its own way. “Okay, deal.”

yes, gojo gave you a fuwakororin of himself. fucking loser.

#gojo x you #gojo x reader #satoru gojo x you #satoru gojo x reader #jjk x reader #nikuniku fics #infinite loop!verse

[bigification]

Ex Jockifier - Male TF

Being the captain of the college football team is a lot of pressure, especially around big games where all eyes are on you. Though you feel the weight lift from your shoulders as you drive away from another successful win. Even better someone from your team is hosting a house party to celebrate.

You show up to the party, covered in your sweaty gear, as it was tradition at your college for the captain to wear his gear after a win. "Hey, the big man made it!" Your buddy yells from the living room. You never got why he called you big man since you weren't that big, but it didn't bother you that much. "Coach bought us a surprise, check it out!" Your bud says with a grin on his face as he drags you to what you could only describe as a futuristic portapotty in the middle of the living room. "Wtf is that!" You laugh at how ridiculous this box looks. "Coach called it the 'Ex Jockifier', said the man of the hour should test it out." He says while nudging you towards it. You assume it'll just have a funnel for booze in it and coach just wants you to let loose after a good game, so you willingly hop in.

You were right in assuming there would be a funnel for booze, but it seems too elaborate on the inside to just be that. Though it's too dark to see much else inside. You climb inside, sit in the surprisingly comfy chair, and put the tube in your mouth. Sure enough, some cheap tasting beer starts flowing through the tube. Normally this amount of beer would be hard for you to chug this fast, but it must have been light if it went down this easy. Before you knew it, you had already lost track of how much booze had entered your body, but you figured you would just go until the beer stopped coming. "How long has it been?" You ask yourself as the alcohol starts to kick in. You almost feel entranced, you don't even notice something starts rubbing your head. A couple nubs start massaging your head as you chug. "Damn this thing can massage too, sick!" You think as you fall deeper into your own mind, though there doesn't seem to be much there right now. Unbeknownst to you, similar nubs start to massage other parts of your body. The only thought you can muster is that it makes your skin feel warm and tight. How long have you been in there? It couldn't have been that long right, but it felt like forever ago that you got in. I mean who cares, the beer tastes better by the second and you feel amazing. As the thoughts get massaged out of your brain, the massage is having just as much impact on your body. You chiselled six pack and solid pecs slowly swell under the touch of the prongs. The bottom row of abs disappears into a pocket of fat, then the second row, then the third until only a flat stomach remains. Though it doesn't last long, as the prongs of the machine massage the now soft fat on your stomach grows and grows until a plump and round belly is all that's left. Your brain had the capacity to pay attention right now, you would hear the sound of your jersey ripping right open. A big rip formed directly in front of your gut, allowing it to lay freely on your thighs.

Your pecs fall to the same fate as your soft gut. They begin to swell until the massaging prongs, they grow further and further out from your body as they begin to hang over your gut. Once proud pecs now more resemble the man tits of a football dad who drink too much beer. Your nipples shift from the outside edge of your chest to the center of each moob, as they each swell to twice their original size. As you continue to grow, what's left of your jersey starts to look more and more like a bra before ripping, releasing your moobs from their prison.

The machine works its magic on the rest of your body, moving from part to part and leaving everything on your body plump and soft. Your ass explodes with fat, ripping through your shorts and leaving nothing but a jockstrap behind. Your thighs become massive trunks, permanently rubbing against eachother. Your feet grow many sizes, making your toes burst through the front of your now tiny shoes. Your arms follow the same trend as your legs, growing thick biceps and massive man hands, perfect for chucking big footballs.

By now, there is not a single thought crossed your mind, just enjoyment of the beer rapidly entering your massive stomach. Though something finally catches your attention as the machine grabs your dick under your jockstrap. Your dick stands up at the slightest touch from the machine, making you tense up. Your massive hands grin the side of the chair as the machine tugs on your dick, stretching it out but also multiplying its girth. Your dick grows until it is barely contained by your jock. As the machine was working your dick, it also began massaging your face. The sharp features of your face begin to soften as fat covers your jawline and your cheeks. Short stubble also starts to grow over your soft jaw and your double chin.

As fast as it began, it ended. All of the machines retracted and beer stopped flowing through the tube. "Fuuuuuuck dude." You chuckle. "Buuurrrrraaaappp!" You let out a massive belch as you get up, having to lean on the wall of the machine to balance yourself. "Fuck dude, I'm so fuuucked." You chuckle again as you keep adjusting your jock, trying in vain to find a comfortable position for your massive cock. "Damn dude, when did this box get so cramped man." You say as both your shoulders now touch either side of the box and you have to duck to even stand.

You whip open the door to see your team staring at you. "That.... Was.... So... Siiick!" You slurr your words. Without hesitation, the entire team starts cheering you on. "Where the fuck did your clothes go big man" your friends asks looking at your near naked body.

You look down at your tiny looking buddy, "Who tf needs clothes!" "You think you got any more room in there big guy." He says as he slaps your gut. "No but you do!" You respond as you toss him into the Ex Jockifier. "Have fun little man!"

The men took turns tossing each other into the machine, watching each one walk out taller, fatter, and much much dumber. The next practice, the coach had a full team of massive guys fully dedicated to only football, just like he planned. It's not like they were smart enough to do anything else other than drink and fuck.

[daintyys]

halloween party at hogwarts? u can pick the pairing n stuff i just think halloween parties are so fun (maybe couples costumes?🤭)

fem!reader x sirius black, 568 words

It was Sirius' idea to do matching costumes. You thought it was a bit cringey, but he was convinced it was a spectacular plan. "I'll be a Vampire, and you'll be my victim. Isn't that a good idea, baby?" You would nod silently, not wanting to sound objected to the idea.

But when Halloween came, you ended up very excited. There was to be a huge party, with everyone invited. Sirius was especially jumpy, not able to hold back his excitement at the thought of you being attached to his hip all night.

You got ready together, obviously, and as you changed into your black corset, he watched in awe.

"Let me tie that for you, jolie fille." He whispered into your ear, tucking your hair out of the way. You blushed, for he was so fucking romantic.

He kissed your neck tenderly as he tightened your corset, biting lightly at your skin.

"Ow! Sirius, did you just bite me?" You asked, giggling.

"Well I'm a Vampire tonight, aren't I?" He said, tying the strings of your corset into a bow.

"Yes, Sirius. You are."

You both looked hot, and you knew it. Walking into the party, Sirius had his arm tightly behind your back, smiling down at you.

"Oi! It's Mr and Mrs Black!" James shouted, running over holding Lily's hand. They were dressed as a doe and a stag, not surprising. "Bugger off, Prongs." Sirius answered, kissing your forehead lightly. You blushed intensely, admiring the decorations of the common room.

Everything was illuminated in an orange glow. It was gorgeous. Jack-o-Lanterns bobbed up and down midair, and the room smelled of freshly brewed tea. The party was fantastic, and the music even better.

You eventually found yourself involved in a heated make-out session with Sirius, when all of a sudden you two were being pulled apart and dragged to opposite sides of the common room. It was obviously game time.

The game was Mummy Wrap, and you and Sirius were chosen as the Mummies-to-be. Whichever team had a better Mummy would win an entire case of Fire Whiskey. Your team consisted of you, Lily, Remus, and Marlene. Sirius' team was him, Peter, James, and Mary.

Alice Fortescue had enchanted her wand with an amplifying charm, and was doing most of the announcements for the party.

"Teams! Get ready to start wrapping!" She called.

You looked over at Sirius, exchanging grins.

“3.. 2.. 1.. GO!"

You were extremely surprised how fast you became wrapped with toilet paper, and how loud the cheering was from onlookers. Seemingly as soon as it started, the timer went off and the wrapping was over.

"Sirius!" You shouted, not being able to see a thing with your face covered.

"Yes, Y/N?" He yelled back, laughing.

"I miss you!" You giggled, struggling to keep your balance.

"I'm sure I miss you more, sweetheart." Sirius purred.

Sirius' team had won the competition, as you had ended up falling over and ripping your Mummy-Wrap before the judging started.

The rest of the party had gone by with a blur, and next thing you knew, you were being carried to the boy's dormitory bridal-style by Sirius.

"That was bloody awesome, Sirius." You cooed, putting your arms around his neck.

"You're bloody awesome." He gushed, dropping you onto his bed.

"Now," Sirius hummed. "how am I supposed to get this god damned corset off of you?"

#daintyys #sirius black x reader #marauders #halloween #harry potter #mal babbles #tumblr

[nikholascrow]

Christmas at the Potter’s - word count: 673 - merry fucking christmas to everyone who celebrates and big hugs to everyone who’s holiday experience has sucked because of family

It was James’ idea. Why must James Potter be bane of his existence first stealing the heart of his best friend and then having the audacity to be nice to Evan and him as well? Barty did not under any circumstances like James Potter. Ever. But now sitting in the Potters’ living room squished between Regulus and a very Sleepy Evan, maybe Barty liked James a Little bit, But only because the couch was so crowded that Evan was partly in his lap and had his head resting on Barty’s shoulder.

James’ grand scheme began one night in the slytherin dorms a week before christmas holidays,

James propped himself up on his elbows and looked up at his boyfriend excitedly “Reg if i turn into prongs would you charm my nose to glow red so i’d look like Rudolph?”

“So you'd look like who?” Regulus looked somewhere between wildly perplexed and mildly entertained.

“like the reindeer- ya know the one with the red nose?”

Evan glanced over from his bed where’d he’d been writing an essay “why on earth would a reindeer have a red nose?”

“He pulls Santa’s sleigh- ya know to bring the presents?” James was looking increasingly more distressed.

Barty sat up from his place next to Evan and asked the question that pushed James over the edge “Who the bloody fuck is Santa?”

what followed was the most chaotic description of Christmas Barty had ever heard after which James realized not a single one of the slytherin boys in the room had ever experienced a proper Christmas.

Less than two days later James plopped down at the slytherin table next to Regulus much to the confusion of most of the contents of the great hall and declared “It’s done!”

all three boys stared at him blankly but Regulus was the first to speak “what’s done-“

James beamed “You’re all coming to mine for Christmas this year! I’ve already asked mum and told Sirius and Remus and Peter and… what?” as if he had just registered how absolutely confuzzled they all looked.

So here Barty was crammed on a couch with Remus, Sirius, Peter, James, Regulus and Evan, his best friend who he definitely did not have a Crush on. Remus, his favorite of the Gryffindors, kept shooting him knowing looks and he was Rapidly dropping down in Barty’s ranking of everyone squished onto the crowded couch at the moment. Barty just glared back at him. Honestly He thought Evan was asleep until elbow jabbed painfully into his ribs and he looked over to see Evan's terrifyingly unreadable Hazel eyes.

then the dazzlingly beautiful blonde had the bloody audacity to smirk at him and push a small perfectly wrapped gift into his hands “merry christmas Bee”

Barty eagerly ripped away the perfect emerald green paper and opened the small box it had encased, the box contained a small oval locket and within that was a picture of him and Evan taken sometime during the summer before 5th year Barty had one an arm draped around Evan and they both wore lazy content smiles Barty remembered that moment it had been perfect he’d prayed it would never end. Bartys face went red and the butterflies that followed could be more accurately described as a rabid raccoon clawing at the walls of his stomach. Barty opened his mouth to thank Evan to say anything but nothing came out, a few minutes of silence later in which Barty was painfully aware of the way Evan was smirking at him he managed to form a complete sentence

“merry christmas Ev” he shoved his messily wrapped gift into Evan's hands unceremoniously and looked anywhere but Evan. Said target of his unfortunately placed affections slowly unwrapped the gift careful not to rip the delicate navy paper, and held up a pretty beaded bracelet Barty has made himself detailed with a silver rose charm. Evan didn’t say anything, just slipped the bracelet on his wrist and curled back up against Barty.

God he was gonna kill James.

#marauders #dead gay wizards #james potter #regulus black #james being the literal sunshine #evan rosier #non toxic rosekiller #barty crouch jr #barty crouch junior #barty x evan #evan x barty #nikos marauders fics #rosekiller fic #rosekiller fanfics #rosekiller microfic #fuck jkr

[unlust-fvck]

hii! could you please write poly!marauders x clumsy!reader? and it’s with the boys being casual dominant (yk what i mean) i hope this makes sense and please tell me if it’s not specific enough🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

fireworks || poly!marauders x reader

word count; 701

pairing; remus lupin x sirius black x james potter x gender neutral reader

description; maybe being clumsy wasn’t so bad

warnings; established relationship, suggestive comment, clumsy!reader, annoyed!remus, james and sirius are literal children

a/n; LOVED this request

“oi fuck!” you hissed in pain as your hip bumped into the corner of the book case.

“bloody hell love,” james snickered as he came to your aid almost immediately, steadying you with his hands on your shoulders. you rolled your eyes and playfully shoved him off you.

he gasped in fake pain and clutched his heart. “help, im wounded!” he whimpered.

in almost an instant, remus was peering out of his bed curtains, sirius close behind.

“again? really?” remus asked, eyes narrowing at james in annoyance. “we’re trying to sleep dick head.” he added. james eyed sirius behind him, who was shirtless.

“i don’t really think there’s a lot of sleeping going on moony.” he tossed over his shoulder with a shrug as he pattered off to the washroom. remus sighed in annoyance and pinched the bridge of his nose. “i hate all of you.” he remarked as he closed the curtain to his bed.

“oi!” you called, ripping the curtain back open. “th’hell did i do?” you said, faux anger lacing your voice. remus just looked at you, sirius dozing off beside him.

“you wounded prongs.” he said with a careless shrug, disturbing sirius who punched him weakly in the ribs. you chuckled and bent over to peck sirius’ forehead. he smiled up at you sleepily.

just as you were about to peck remus’, you were pulled down into the bed lightly by the latter, but fell harder than you should’ve. you accidentally hit sirius’s face in the process.

“you are so uncoordinated!” he hissed, but smiled dopily as he rubbed his face. “m’sorry!” you said quickly as you pulled yourself together and sat at the edge of the bed cautiously.

it was a staring game in comfortable silence before remus spoke up, “s’alright pup, y’just need to be careful alright?” he said gently as he patted the spot between him and sirius.

with as much delicacy as you could muster, you plopped down between them and rested your head on sirius’ shoulder. he grinned and pecked your temple, his hand resting on your thigh. remus wrapped an arm around your waist and opened his book, skimming through.

it was silent for a moment, then in came james like a bat out of hell. he jumped on the foot of the bed without opening the curtains and sirius shot up.

“christ prongs! at least a warning!” sirius said in a high pitched tone.

james giggled and laid his head on remus’ shins, looking up at you. “s’alright, prongslet can’t be the only clumsy one!” he smiled.

“will you stop calling them that?” remus sighed, annoyed. your face buzzed with admiration and it was evident too. “oh c’mon, they’re ours too.” sirius said as he shoved james.

then it started again.

sirius and james began shoving each other, not only disrupting you, but remus as well. he tossed his book aside and scooped you up before you could protest. he moved over to sirius’ bed and closed the curtains, still holding you. you smiled up at him and he couldn’t help but follow suit. “they’re so annoying.” he said with a small chuckle as he rubbed your frame.

you nodded slowly, “i still love them though.” you giggled quietly as you finally broke eye contact, twirling a misbehaved strand of hair around your finger. “well i hope you do bunny.” he smiled, pecking your temple. you nodded and just as you were about to respond, james and sirius came barreling into the bed.

remus sighed and looked up at them, “what now?” he asked. sirius shook his head with a grin, “just wanna see you guys. promise we’ll behave.” he said as he sat cross-legged on the edge of the bed. james scooted up beside remus in no time and took you from his hold. he brushed a strand of hair behind your ear and kissed your lips gently.

as you reciprocated, you remembered how you used to never believe it when people would say that they’d feel butterflies or fireworks in instances like this, but your boyfriends had definitely changed that.

#jays fics !! #poly marauders x reader #poly marauders #sirius black #james potter #remus lupin #sirius black x reader #remus lupin x reader #james potter x reader #poly marauders fic #fanfiction #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction

[eldritch-spouse]

Vinnel

Is honestly the easiest to draw …cas I can’t draw muscular man… anyway this is the second time I drawn him :) what will he think if I show him this? (Probably rip to little pieces…knowing him) would love to fuc— the shit out of him if I could 😋

Very cute!!! ✨️

Vinnel is not the easiest to draw, like objectively he's not. I struggle with certain portions of him, I have no idea how you see him as the easiest to draw, but congratulations! 👀

Vinnel likes an artsy or crafty person. Perhaps not as much as a monster like Shags, but someone who can make something every once in a while.

When shown a drawing of himself, you can always expect him to mess with you by saying something like "My sleeves are bigger!" or "Wow Poppet you gave me a prong-cut, huh?", maybe even a "Does my ass look that fat to you?" but none of these are genuine jabs, only meant to rise some sort of defensive bickering from you. The jester giggles and stores these drawings away in the same place he usually keeps his dolls. The ones he particularly cherishes are hidden in a place where Vinnel keeps extremely important memorabilia.

It may seem as if he's discarded them, but rest assured all drawings are kept somewhere safe from prying eyes.

#Vinnel oc #whynot5243

[siiinfully]

continued from this with @asexxxualerotica

[Let my son go you bastard!!]

Khadamori’s voice roared in the mind of the man clutching Kthanid as the towering eldritch king seemed to appear from out of nowhere—a massive tentacled arm ripping through the air to suddenly snatch around the cloaked figure’s throat and squeeze tight, while his other arm unwrapped into the six tentacles that composed it, three on each of the assailant’s arms and pulling back hard to force him to release his son. Blazing blue eyes burned in the darkness as Khadamori made himself know, snarling down at the hooded man.

+++

While her son and husband were locked in a showdown with a mysterious figure, Quinn was having problems of her own. She had just learned she was pregnant – six weeks along – and was now on the receiving end of a trident. The one on the other end was someone she recognized: someone from her husband’s horrible past and who seemed eager to strike him at his weak points. One of them being her.

“Please,” she whispered, the terror she felt mainly being for the life growing inside her and not for herself. “If this is about my husband, let me talk to him. I’m sure we can find a way to fix th—” The rest of her sentence was silenced as she felt the sharp point of the middle prong pierce her skin. Before she could scream or say or do anything else, the pain was gone and the sound of someone screaming and then hitting one of the marble pillars filled her ears.

#'quinn' ( thread ) #asexxxualerotica

[ddejavvu]

can i get stuffed peppers to share with james potter! one bed trope pls <3

you are formally invited to ddejavvu's 10K dinner party, now serving hors d'oeuvres

--

"The antlers need to go," You huff, the thick, sturdy prongs nearly beheading you as the giant deer folds himself up on your bed. You glare down at James as the boy gets comfortable, your bedcurtains practically ripped apart by the scuffle.

"Just because Pads gets to be up here when he's a dog does not mean you're all allowed up in your animagus forms." You remind James, receiving only a huff from the deer in response. You eye his antlers warily, craning your neck back to rest on your pillow and avoiding being poked in the eye.

"I swear, Potter," You mutter, daring to close your eyes despite your predicament, "If I don't wake up, I'm coming back to haunt your ass."

#james potter #james potter x reader #james potter imagine #james potter scenario #james potter oneshot #james potter one-shot #james potter one shot #james potter headcanon #james potter headcanons #james potter hc #james potter hcs #james potter fanfiction #james potter fanfic #james potter fic #james potter blurb #james potter drabble #james potter dialogue #james potter fluff #james potter x reader fanfiction #ddejavvu's 10k dinner party !!

[space-phonetic0]

The first thing that he becomes aware of is the chill. The second, is the soft cushiony fabric of which he is lying on.

He opens his eyes to pitch blackness, seeming to stretch on forever. He raises his right hand intending to touch his face, instead he crashes into something soft and silky, yet hard at the same time.

He opens his eyes only to see darkness. He reached out his hands and felt soft fabric. Upon further inspection. He realized he was trapped in a box, a coffin. Vomit rose in his throat, his head ached. As he began to claw at the ceiling of the coffin. Several fingernails were pulled off. Words slipped past his lips. quiet at first. Then a bit louder. “Bruce….. Bruce…..”.

What is this? where am I?

(Struggling to remember what happened.)

flashes of memories burned through his mind. blurry images of a purple suited man. with a horrific white face and blood red lips.

numbers counting down

pleading for the man who he considered his father to come and save him. wishing he could say goodby. wishing he could say thank you.

Where has Joker put me? Where is Bruce?

His mind was a blank. Everything was fuzzy and he was so dizzy. His whole body ached. All he could think was “OUT, I must get out”.

muscles and nerves remembering his robin training. he searched around for anything that would aid his escape. discovering his belt buckle. Jason, griped it between his index and middle fingers.

angling the buckle with the prong pointed up. Jason began stabbing and scratching the lid of the coffin. Ripping the soft silk and creating indentions in the polished oak.

Breaking through the top of the coffin. Dirt spilled on top of him. The dark earth was heavy. He took a gulping breath and swallowed only dirt. Desperately clawing his way to the top. blood leaking out of him colouring the earth. his throat burning

After what felt like eternity. He finally made it out into fresh air. Coughing up dirt. He gasped for air. Breaths coming in painful burning his lungs

He heaved himself up. Out of the ground. Rain was pelting down soaking him and making the dirt slippery and hard to grasp.

He fell over onto the muddy ground. Overwhelmed by the fuzzy thoughts coursing through his impaired brain. The sensation of the sludgy dirt beneath his skin was almost sickening. Making his skin crawl.

His suit was itchy to his oxygen deprived skin. His tie almost choking him.

Lurching and shivering, he slowly got to his knees. Shaky feet sinking into the ground as he stepped forward.

Jason moved his left foot forward. Nearly stumbled when his foot sank up to the ankle in mud.

His body felt numb and awkward. Like it was not his own. Close to vomiting he continued on. Walking slowly, stumbling around. The rain was still coming down mercilessly. Heavy drops slamming down onto his body.

Rain water was in his eyes. nearly blinding him. Thinking nothing, He continued through the graveyard observing the dirty stones sticking out of the earth.

His confused mind thought only one thing. "Get to Bruce"

Reaching the gate. He stumbled over the threshold.

Blindly reaching out he gripped the side of a brick wall. Following the wall until it ended. Next to an old church.

With difficulty, Jason raised his head toward the sky. spotting the moon over Gotham skyline.

suddenly, a ninja star flew past Jasons view of the moon. startled, Jason refocused his gaze onto the church. A young dark haired Arabian looking woman. was fighting several men dressed in assassins garb.

muscle memory took over. Jason sprang onto the nearest ninja. quickly disarming and knocking him out.

in a matter of minutes. Jason and the woman had subdued the assassins. Exhausted, the boy fell to his hands and knees, breathing heavily.

Talia, curious as to who had aided her in battle. Walked over to the disheveled boy. Kneeling down, she grasped the boys shoulders and lifted his head. Shock coursed through her. "Jason!!!!!!!"

The boy was resting fully against her now. How could this be? Questions swirled through her head. One thing was certain she had to take him back home with her.

the end.

id like to write more to this. when Talia puts Jason in the pit. his training and his time in Gotham. an idea I have is Jason doesn't go back to Gotham to seek revenge. but stays with the all caste. something happens and he has to come back to Gotham. he doesn't want bruce to find out he's alive so does his best to lay low.

im making no promises. so we'll see.

#batfamily #Jason todd #Jason todd crawling out of his grave #Jason todd red hood #batman under the red hood #batman #bruce wayne

[ijustwantogohomehogwarts]

i | s a id | i m | f i n e

i | s a i d | i m | f i n e

Sirius says he's fine, but showed up to the Potters on Christmas Eve barely alive. Something about that doesn't seem "fine" to anyone! After locking himself in his room for 3 days, y/n takes matters into her own hands.

warnings and such: mentions of abuse, sleep deprivation, angst, swearing, sad! and scared! Sirius

---------------------------------------------------------------------

James Potter was a rather loud person, the life of the party, he could light up a room just by walking in, he was sunshine on a cloudy day- all the clichés that make him a lovable person- but his inability to whisper at 2 am? He might not make it to breakfast alive!

"Padfoot, come on! Open the door, please!"

"James!" I hissed through gritted teeth, poking my head out of my own bedroom door at the end of the hallway. "If you wake me up one more night this week-"

"Y/n, he's obviously not fine! He just needs to talk to someone! I know if he just-"

"Don't you dare say anything about him opening that door!"

James opened and closed his mouth a few times, clearly trying to decide whether or not it was worth arguing with me about it. He finally groaned in defeat, running a hand through his already unkempt hair.

"Will you try? Sirius loves you, maybe he'll listen to you?"

"Prongs, he loves you too, but he needs space. And time. And sleep!"

James laughed nervously, avoiding eye contact with me for a moment.

"Please?"

I sighed, reserved to loose sleep for the rest of my life if I didn't try to talk to Sirius. I nodded, but told James he had to go back to bed. He went, reluctantly.

You should have just gone back to sleep Y/N, honestly. How you manage to get yourself into every possible situation-

*knock* *knock*

"Alohamora," I whispered, hearing the lock click before pushing open the door, closing it quickly behind me. Obviously James hadn't tried that yet!

"Prongs, for fucks sake, I told you I'm f-" Sirius spun around, ready to rip my throat out of I really had been James. "Oh, hello!"

I held my hands up in defense

"Where's James?"

"He went to the bathroom," i lied, though it seemed innocent enough, "I'm hiding in here before he comes to bother me next!"

"Y/n, I've told you guys i'm fine! I don't need a damn babysitter! You can leave!"

"Yeah, I know you're fine. You've told us about 100 times..."

"Yes! Thank you! Now will you please go tell James that before he-" I could feel Sirius watching me as I walked further into the room, pulling back the covers on bed and crawling in.

"No, no. Go tell James."

"I'll tell him in the morning, Pads, I promise, but please don't make me leave! He's been keeping me up allllll night and i'm so tired!" That one wasn't a lie.

Sirius groaned and grumbled, looking at me with a heavy sign before throwing his own hands up in surrender.

"I hate all of you. And you're in my spot."

I rolled my eyes, but much to my dismay he was literally trying to 'shoo' me out of the spot in bed.

I laid on my back, arms stretched out to the side, trying to make myself comfortable. I had my eyes closed and didn't see Sirius crawling in to bed beside me, though I felt him move around quite excessively. He kept kicking my shin and I was just about to yell at him when-

The groan was caught in my throat, squeezing it's way out under the weight pressing down on top of me. My eyes snapped open and I was met with a mess of soft black hair, Sirius' arms wrapping around me as he tried to make himself comfortable. He finally settled with a 'huff'

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help smiling to myself. I hugged him back, playing with the ends of his hair and decided that if this is what he needed, i'd be happy to give it to him. I must admit, this was nice.

"I told you guys, I'll fine." he repeated

"I know."

Sirius lay still and quiet for quite some time, his breathing got heavier and my own eyes began to succumb to the promise of sleep until-

"Y/n?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm not fine," Sirius croaked out, his grip on me becoming impossibly tight as he buried his face in the crook of my neck.

I suppressed a gasp as I tried to comfort him, still a bit shocked and unable to move. One hand cradled his head, the other rubbed up and down his back, trying to still his breathing. I soon felt warm tears littering my skin, and could have sworn a felt my own heart break.

"I got you, love, it's okay." I kissed the top of his head

"I hate her!" he sobbed

I knew he was talking about Walburga. I had only met her once and even I hated her! I hadn't met anyone who had a single decent thing to say about her. Any mother who would do what she did to her sons deserved to meet dementors, face to face.

"I'm sorry.."

"It's all my fault" he sobbed

"Sirius, nothing is your fault!"

"I should have stayed,"

"You would have died-"

"What if she kills him?!"

Regulus.

"Look at me,"

I shoved Sirius off of me just enough to slide down the bed, laying face to face with him. His arms immediately wound around me again, gripping tightly to the back of my t shirt. I held his head in both hands, tipping his chin up to look at me, and carefully wiped the tears from his cheeks. I kissed his forehead, his nose, and the cheek that wasn't pressed to the pillow. He sighed, and I wiped more tears from his face.

"Sirius, listen to me." His eyes were closed as he tried to steady his breathing but he nodded, acknowledging me as I spoke.

"You've spent your entire life protecting everyone else, including your brother. Not once have you expected anything in return. You're the most selfless person I've ever met! You left that house because you had no choice. If you stayed, you would have died. Then what?!"

"What if she kills him because I'm not there?" he began to cry again, and I resumed kissing his face.

"Do you know that James would do anything for you? That Moony would do anything for you? That Peter would do anything for us? That I would do anything for any of you?"

"What's the point?"

"Do you trust us?"

"What-"

"Yes? or No?"

"Yes.."

"Sirius, if your brother wants out of that house, if he needs to get out of that house- we will get him out. No questions asked. We would do it for you. For both of you. THAT is what family is for."

He was quiet for a minute, as if thinking this over

"Will you check on him?"

"Everyday!"

"Promise?" he sniffled, holding a bony pinky finger in front of my face.

"I promise."

This seemed to satisfy Sirius. I intended to make good on that promise, and check on Regulus everyday at school. He and I had been getting alone well and becoming closer, but I don't think Sirius understood to what extent that was.

Either way, I knew with full confidence that Regulus Black was not going to die at the hands of his mother.

Sirius and I stayed quiet for a while, the feeling of sleep crept up on me again, an overwhelming wave of exhaustion spilling into my body-

*knock* *knock*

"Y/n? Sirius?"

"James, I'm going to chop off your fingers."

"Woah, woah! Why so hostile y/n/n?"

"Moony?!"

"We just wanted to check on you guys, but at the risk of dying or loosing extremities, we can chat in the morning!"

The boys back out slowly, laughing as they did, and closed the door behind themselves.

"Fine." I groaned, sinking lower in the bed, pulling the covers high over my head, resting with a thud on Sirius' stomach.

"Oi, you alright?"

"I said I'm fine!" That came out a bit harsher than I intended, but it was an excellent impression of Sirius from earlier in the night!

Sirius stilled for a moment before he began to laugh. I couldn't help but join in.

After all, he really was fine!

#sirius black #sirius #sirius being sirius #ancient and most noble house of black #james potter #remus lupin #y/n #sirius black x reader #marauders #marauders era #angst #comfort #best friends #sirius deserved better #moony #wormtail #padfoot #prongs #walburga's a+ parenting

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

My Sunlight

THIS IS IT! The moment you have all been waiting for. The culmination of at least three years of stories, the climax!  This was so exciting to write, I hope you enjoy!. 

https://www.patreon.com/empyreaniris?fan_landing=true

https://starr-fall-knight-rise.tumblr.com/post/182501791735/master-post

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jzEIdDAB4omdO2JcQVMObfrhLJ5kX4ONmSsLypM1ks0/edit?usp=sharing

Krill felt the prongs of Kazna’s trident pierce his chest. The pain was exquisitely excruciating, beyond anything he had ever felt before. As a Vrul he had once experienced pain differently, but in human form, the difference was something he simply couldn’t describe.

But he knew, this was worse.

All his senses were heightened, all his nerves more acutely tuned to the instinct of survival.

And that instinct told him he was dying.

The prong of her spear had punched through the wall of his thoracic cavity and pierced straight through an atrium of his heart, blood gushed briefly over the facade of his chest as his heart spasmed for life, but it was no use. He felt his extremities go cold as everything around him faded to black.

-

His next moment of awareness came with a sudden sense of cold, like being plunged into a pool of Earth-Arctic water. Krill opened his mouth to gasp but found he could not pull in the air.  What followed was immediate panic as he realized he couldn’t breathe. All other senses were momentarily blocked from his consciousness as he fought for breath. His respiratory system flatlined, then struggled, but finally, with one great, choking gasp, he began to expel the embryonic mucus that had done its job to protect him during the fight. Air rushed into his body, whose senses seemed surprisingly dull and muted after experiencing death as a human.

Krill gasped limbs flailing as he tried to push himself upright, body thick with the protective slime that had preserved his construct. The armor he had been wearing was now an empty husk without a driver. Slowly, his vision resolved, brain attempted to adjust from the sharp clarity of human sight to the prismatic nature of Vrul vision.

It was the blood he noticed first, so much of it, covering the deck and pooling in great ruby pools.

And then there was Adam.

He lay chest down on the deck, half of his helmet cracked away to reveal his face which glowed ghostly pale with blood loss. Blood loss, because the blood was everywhere else,, coating his body and cracked suit…. And the SE hardware trailing behind him. The spine of the SE exoskeleton had been ripped completely off. The attachments for the arms and chest had either been ripped off or snapped away from the force, and now it was attached by only the bloody cables that still held the suit to his lower body.

The rest dragged on the ground like spilled viscera.

“Krill” He wheezed.

He didn’t know what to do…. Not here, not without an immediate surgical suite.

All around them, there was carnage.

Ramirez and, to his surprise, maverick lay in a heap at the far end of the disk, Sunny lay next to them, just beginning to stir, while kazna and lanus battled for dominion, though he was fighting a losing battle.

Every moment another flickering of the architect’s light would mark a rise in her power.

And just behind them, a streak of light and energy was headed in their direction.

He looked back at the suit.

Adam had crawled over, and let him out of the suit, it had likely taken the last of what remained in him.

Sunny groaned and began to crawl to her feet. 

And that’s when krill saw it.

The console.

Kazna had been standing in front of it before, but the fight with Lanus had pulled her away, leaving it open. He was no fighter, even in human form that was true, but he was smart, and that was not up for debate.

In that moment he knew what he needed to do.

As much as it killed him to do it.

He stood.

“Fealty, are you there?’

Adam’s suit let off a soft and mournful whine, almost painful, “Start the clotting agent and lower his body temperature. Help as long as you can.”

The Suit chirped.

“Krill>” Adam mumbled.

“Don’t worry, I have a plan,” Krill said, scuttling across the deck as fast as his legs would carry him, which was a pace somewhere between frustrating and mind-numbing after being a human. Behind him, Sunny had made it to her feet. 

Kazna screamed, Lanus stepped forward, scything through another set of tendrils eyes burning with golden anger.

Krill could see the console now, very simple, with a joystick and a keypad with a single screen. The screen blinked a green display, marking the center of the black hole as its target. If Krill could get to that console, he might be able to redirect the beam of energy and blast the anima off into space.

Sure that wasn’t ideal, but at least they wouldn’t be gone forever, and Apollyon wouldn’t gain more power.

Pity for him Kazna knew what he intended.

Krill heard a roar, turning just in time to see Kazna pelting across the deck towards him at full tilt, black tendrils fanning out behind her like great, black wings. Lanus ran behind her arm outstretched. Krill squealed and tried to dive out of the way, but his legs were slow and awkward.

Kazna ran past Adam, who had just enough strength left in him to reach up and stab at her exposed ankle. Kazna screamed and stumbled, just long enough to give Sunny an opening. She dove forward going nearly horizontal as she reached for Krill. In a moment his world was turned upside down as Sunny wrapped her arms around him, tucking him into her chest and rolling just as kazna blazed through the space where he had been.

Sunny landed in a crouch, skidding across the deck with one hand on the metal, and two hands around Krill. Her fourth hand held a short double-sided combat knife that krill hadn’t seen her recover. 

Her eyes blazed with golden fire.

She set Krill down, “GO!”

He didn’t waste time, racing the last few feet towards the console as Sunny Ran to intercept kazna both her and lanus reaching Kazna just as she was coming back around to take another pass at Krill.

Lanus came in hard, shoulder-checking Kazna off course and into Sunny’s line of attack. Sunny swung and stabbed in arching sweeps from left to right cutting through tendrils in rapid succession. Lanus flanked from the other side confusing kazna’s tendrils long enough for Sunny to scythe through them.

Kazna turned from Lanus to Sunny, trying to maneuver herself out of a flanked position, but, Lanus and Sunny refused to allow it, dancing deftly on either side of her, lanus a burning warrior of gold, and his daughter Sunny, small, limping, blood-stained, and broken, but vicious.

She said nothing.

But her actions spoke louder than any curse or diatribe ever could have.

She spoke instead with her blade, dicing her mother’s blackness to ribbons with unerring precision.

Krill, had flung himself at the console frantically scrambling at the controls. He tried moving the joystick, but it did nothing.

He cursed viciously with all the human curses he knew.

What did he need to do!

Krill frantically started pressing buttons as the distant column of light approached, growing larger with every seconds.

What was he doing!.

Kazna was backed against the railing, and out of their flank, managing to scoot along the edge and towards Krill, She was now doing her best to fight Lanus and Sunny off from the front.

And she was winning.

Krill’s eyes scanned over the console all four hemispheres of his brain working in desperate tandem to determine how the machine worked. 

In the sky before him the battle between Apollyon and the Architect raged on, tendrils of blackness, against a humanoid silhouette of shifting white light. The architect ripped and pulled at Apollyon, and in turn Apollyon’s tendrils ripped chunks from the Architect.

Krill’s eyes swept desperately over the console.

Kasna was in tatterers backed nearly against the rail just behind him.

Sunny stood between them.

AHA! He found it!

Overhead the architect began to flicker.

Kazna broke into manic laughter as all her tendrils sprouted back into place, the wounds in her body fusing shut. Apollyon pulsed with triumph as Kazna lunged forward towards Sunny, bloody, broken, and no match for her sudden surge of power.

Krill was seconds behind.

Sunny braced herself for impact, Krill did the same.

Kazna’s scream of triumph was cut off as four massive golden arms encircled her from behind. Lanus’s weapon lay on the deck, discarded, his back against the railing. From over Kazna’s shoulder, and behind a wall of waving tendrils he uttered a phrase that echoed through both physical and cognitive spaces, soothing, sad, and resigned but also glowing with pride and warmth.

 “I love you Chalan, and I always will.” 

Then General Lanus of Anin braced one foot hard against the railing, and pitched them both over the edge.

“NO!” Sunny screamed

The beam of golden light hit the ring and began to burn.

Krill slammed his fist against the joystick.

The ring fired.

A beam of golden energy streaked across the night sky and hit the architect directly in the center of his chest. 

Apollyon Screamed, with a psychic wave so powerful it brought Krill and Sunny to their knees. 

The architect’s back bowed, arms held out to either side fingers curling into talons, his head thrown back. Light and energy poured into him as a torrent, his skin began to brighten. Krill turned his head away, but still, the light was terrible, brighter than the first flash of a nuclear eruption and growing brighter.

Krill curled into a ball.

So bright, that briefly across both Andromeda and the milky way, a new star burst into existence, brighter than a supernova.

And then the architect flexed his hand.

A wave of energy burst out from him in all directions, searing away Apollyon’s tendrils, frying the necritorium, shutting down void power, searing away void infection, and forcing Apollyon back into the blackness of the hole from whence he came.

As the light faded, Sunny, Chalan, Lanusdaughter staggered to her feet, half blind and almost deff she threw herself against the railing looking down into the swirling darkness of the black hole, no longer rimmed by light, “No…. no no no.” She whispered, “Please no.” Her body shook with a sob,

 “Nane, Tak, gda tsa.” Please, father, where are you?

She repeated the words again through another sob.

But a cough broke through her pleading.

She turned, to find Adam lying on his back, the last bit of energy spent. He coughed against and blood bubbled from his lips.

“No.” 

She ran to him, gently pulling him up to rest in her arms, “Je nane jee jeeanish.” No, please don’t die

He would have reached up to touch her face, but he didn’t have the energy. “Zhak Chaleel (My sunlight), I’ve made it through worse.” 

[latenightsimping]

Cheeky Lil Devil (drabble)

I don’t really have much of an explanation on this. It was me, @mantorokk-writes , @mcplestreet, @charlie-heatons-whxre & @corrodedhawkins being cheeky (wheyy) in a gc about Eddie lmao

cw: nudity, smut implied and mentioned but not described explicitly, sorta fluff, kinda cute? idk

At first, you wondered if you were seeing things. Wondered if it was just a trick of the light, or something that got transferred from the bedsheets somehow.

But no, that was a tattoo. On your boyfriend’s ass cheek.

You were surprised you’d never seen it before. Then again, most times he was naked, you weren’t exactly paying much attention considering the warm haze of pleasure that he so often put you under. You’d marvelled the rest of his body for countless hours; the soft pudge of his belly peppered with fine hairs that trailed under his belly button, the strong forearms that flexed in exertion and strong thighs that you loved to trace your fingertips over when you lay in bed wearing nothing. And yes, you had let your eyes follow his bare ass whenever he got up to grab a glass of water from the kitchen, but you swore you’d never seen the little heart on the left cheek until now.

“Babe,” you began, eyebrows furrowed as you sat yourself further up on the bed. “Is that… Do you have something on your ass?”

He made a hum of enquiry as he looked over to you from where he was fiddling with the stereo, standing up to his full height before his head craned behind him to see what you were looking at. A grin spread over his face; the boyish, lopsided grin that had stolen your heart so long ago. “Yeah,” he chuckled, shrugging slightly as he continued with feeding another cassette into the slot. “Got it when I was absolutely fuckin’ wasted at a house party couple of years ago now. Like it?”

You made a noise of contemplation, pulling a mock look of deep thought as he turned to get back into bed. “I dunno. Lemme see it up close?”

Though he laughed, he still indulged you, turning onto his stomach so you could see it. Now you were focusing, you could see it wasn’t just a heart. You could see the tiny devil horns on the top, a little pronged tail trailing down the bottom. All in faded black lines, most of them shaky and not well applied. Though it wasn’t what you expected to see, you couldn’t deny how… Eddie it was. It was tongue in cheek, slightly tacky, and rough around the edges. Things you’d heard him described as, and some you could agree with. Rough around the edges, for sure. All chains and ripped denim, but an absolute sweetheart underneath it. Tongue in cheek, absolutely. He knew his name had been dragged through the mud, and he had lost his energy to give a fuck about it long ago. Slightly tacky? Sometimes, but you adored him nonetheless.

“What’s the verdict?” he finally asked after a few heartbeats of silence, a brow raised with his bottom lip tucked between his teeth. Fuck, he looked so handsome like this. Not a care in the world, and not a stitch of clothing on him. Good enough to eat.

Playfully slapping his ass, you watched it slightly jiggle with delight as you flopped onto your back. “Totally metal, babe. Suits you.”

A grin spread over his face as he shifted to his side, his arms encircling your waist to bring you closer to his chest. “Yeah? Maybe we could get you one too. Have matching tatties.”

You couldn’t help but giggle as you settled yourself to get comfortable, resting your chin against his sternum to look up at him. “Not exactly romantic, is it? An ass tattoo?”

“It’s totally romantic,” he scoffed, a hand coming up to tuck an errant strand of hair behind your ear. His eyes glimmered with mischief, slightly darkened as he raised a brow. “Would look totally hot on you, too.”

“You think my ass is, and I quote, ‘hottest ass in the whole of Hawkins’, tattoo or not,” you countered, the apples of your cheeks heating up as you remembered when he’d said it. When you’d bent over to reach something at the bottom of his fridge, followed up after a wolf whistle from behind you. Not that you minded his endless compliments.

“Guilty as charged,” he replied in a low murmur, leaning down to press a hot kiss to your eager lips. You felt a hand grab the meat of your ass in a firm grip, making you squeal against him. The kiss deepened, and you knew exactly what it meant. It meant that even though you’d not long fucked, he was ready for another round.

It meant you weren’t going to sleep for a while yet. And you couldn’t find it within yourself to complain.

#eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson drabble #eddie munson blurb #stranger things imagine #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things x you #late night drabbles

[robynlilyblack]

One Day at a Time

Chapter 2: November 4th 1981

Remus Lupin x fem! marauder! reader (eventually)

Summary: Baby steps are a good start, even the silly ones

Warnings: swearing, mentions of slight nudity, past relationships (sirius x reader, and slight wolfstar), scissors used to decapitate a lamp shade (no I will not elaborate...), feeling sick, food, and eating, canon character deaths, angst, slight trauma, grief, bittersweet fluff

A/n: 7k words, sorry for the day delay, had to prepare for a dig tomorrow and fix classes yesterday xx please enjoy!

Navigation | Remus Lupin Masterlist | Chapter 1 | Chapter 3

“What’ch ya doing”

Remus froze at the voice, cheeks burning as he turns so slowly around from the mirror he was posing in. There was no way he was talking his way out of this, was there? He was dress in his clothes, an unlit cigarette dangling from his mouth as he pretended to be ‘cool’

“Y-you’re back early” he notes, removing the cigarette from and closing his eyes for a moment, anxious to avoid the amused look painted on his face

“That I am” the raven-haired boy chuckles, casually kicking the dorm room door closed before sauntering in “So…” he grins, eyes flicking up and down “Care to explain?” he raises an eyebrow

Remus sighs and moves to sit on the window still, bringing his knees up to his chest “I look silly don’t I?” he doesn’t answer the question, just goes straight to feeling stupid for ever thinking he could ever look or be normal

He watches the boy hop up, his look of amusement softening as he settles on the opposite side, one leg hanging off with the other slightly bent “You don’t look silly Moons” he taps his foot “Sure the jeans are a bit short at the ends, way too tight in some areas…” he laughs a little and Remus presses his legs together “…but you don’t look silly, the poses however, there were a little…” he trails off, bobbing his head 

Remus looks up at him in shock “Oh fuck” his face drops into his hands and practically hides behind his knees “How long were you standing there and please for the love of Godric lie to me” he pleads, wihsing for the world to swallow him whole, why did it have to be him that caught him?

“Well. I didn’t come in when you were doing an impression of me flirting with y/n last week…” Remus makes a whining sound “…and I certainly did not when you were talking to yourself about how many buttons you should undo” he tells him, clearly trying not to smile too much, nor enjoy himself

Groaning into his hands Remus leans back before looking down at his appearance. His eyes went to the jeans first, black, ripped and really were way too tight, he was a little taller then him, thighs a little bigger too, in fact it took longer than Remus would like to admit to get them up and over his arse.

Sighing he then looked to his chest, cursing his wolfy condition for the prominence of hair poking out above the open topped shirt. Like his scars weren’t ugly enough

“I’m not mad ya know” his head shoots back up “Or Judging you” he adds and Remus feels a little better, still beyond embarrassed yes, but a smidge better “The things we do alone are our own, and if you want me to give you some clothes I’m more than happy to. We can even charm them to fit better” he assures further and Remus’ heart warms, a small smile cracking across his face “You don’t have to tell me why if you don’t want to either”

Remus shuffles back a little, sitting up a little straighter as he leans forward to wrap his arms around his legs, chin resting on his knees “I wanted to feel…normal I guess” he shakes his head “I know normal isn’t the word for it but…I wanted to feel like you or Prongs…even Bugs…just…just…” he lets out a sorry breath, looking down

“Normal” he finishes with a shrug

“Yeah” Remus nods “I wish…I wonder sometimes what I’d be like if I hadn’t been bitten. What kind of person I would have become if I didn’t feel like I’m…constantly drowning” he confesses quietly

Remus looks back up at the boy before him, seeing a sad, downturned smile on his face

“You want an honest to merlin answer?” he asks and Remus nods slowly “You would be the same person you are now, maybe you wouldn’t feel held back by your condition but there would be somethin'. I’d still be hot-headed, reckless and make huge…huge mistakes…”

He closes his eyes for a minute and Remus feels a sudden and overwhelming stab to the heart...yet he can’t quite figure out why

“…even if my family weren’t arseholes" he continues "But no matter what our what if’s are we can’t change the reality. Everyone is drowning in their own way, me, you, Bugs…but the best thing we can do is try to keep the ones we love afloat and hope they do the same for us in return”

Remus nods, eyes growing glassy “When’d you get so wise?” he lets out a small chuckle

He laughs himself “It comes and goes. Don’t get used to it, by morning I’ll be making stupid decisions again” he throws him a wink

Blush threatens Remus’ cheeks but he supresses it “I’ll hold you to that” is all he says, fiddling with the roll up in his hand

“You know it just ticked over into mornin'” he nods to the window and Remus sees the sun beginning to rise slowly before he feels the cigarette leave his fingers “You wanna try?” he asks, cracking the window as he lights up

Remus eyes it then him “You live to corrupt me, don’t you?” he shakes his head

“Not just you, silly wolf” he hands it over

Remus rolls his eyes, taking the cigarette like it was second nature muttering “Arsehole” before placing the filter to his lips

“You love me really”

“I don’t” he quips taking a drag and they both chuckle for a moment before Remus’ eyes narrow as the light from the window grows brighter

“I need to go soon” 

Remus feels his heart drop, turning back as he feels warmth on his face, light brightening still

“I’m not ready”

“No one ever is” he shrugs with a sad smile “You’ll look after her for me, won't ya moony moony? She needs you”

“Always” is all he manages to whisper before it all goes white

Remus' eyes flutter open, waking to the sun beating through the window whose curtains he forgot to close. His body was flat against the couch, laying on his stomach with his face squished up against the soft pillow, leg and arm hanging off of the couch he was far too big for

He looked down to his bedroom, checking you were still there, that you were even real. Relief washing over him as he sees your leg kick out of the covers that engulfed you like a cozy cocoon. 

He closed his eyes again for a minute, processing his dream and hating himself for it.

For Remus there where two versions of him. One his friend, one who loved him, one who was good and crazy and wonderful, that made mistakes but always made up for them. And then there was the one he became, the murderer, the accuser, the traitor, the one who killed his best friends, utterly destroyed his own heart and obliterated yours

Yet much like yourself and despite it all, he still loved him, and those words echoed in his mind as his eyes opened again, staring at your figure

“I’ll look after her” he whispers for himself and for a past version of him that was now long dead

Remus lifted his head as high as he could to try and see the time without having to get up but still couldn’t quite see over the back of the couch. Huffing he moved his hand down to the floor to support him only to find in his post sleep state he completely misjudges the distance and ends up toppling off the couch completely

“Fuck!” he curses after hitting the floor, holding his elbow is it rings from the collision

stupid funny bone

He didn’t even bother to get up, just moved onto his back and groaned. The silence of which, out with his whines, lasted all of two seconds before he looks down between his feet to see you skidding out of his bedroom in slippers that were far too big for you

“Are you ok-oh-whoa” you start frantically to which he smiles at your level of concern before, much like him, your post-sleep state combined with those ridiculous slippers cause you to fall, landing on your knees with a thump

“Fuck!” you whine, collapsing down to your side before eventually just lying on the floor beside him, clutching your knees to your chest for a few moments before letting them slide back down to the floor

Remus tries not to laugh as he tilts his head to the side “You okay?” he asks, still holding his elbow and rubbing it gently with his thumb, trying to ignore the prolonged ache

You copy his movements, seeing the smile he tries to hide but does terribly at. After all these years you could read every emotion on his face, he was amused but also held some concern if you were alright…you could also see his own pain, how even a small impact on his arm could cause lasting effects  

“Nope” you laugh it off, scrunching your nose in almost a fake cry “Are you?” you check, eyes pointing to his elbow

“No” he does the same, huffing a laugh even if you can tell he’s lying just a tad “We’re complete…”

“Disasters” you finish nodding, giggling together as his hand falls back to his side you interlace them, your other hand coming around his elbow and rubbing it gently, to which he squeezes it before beginning to giggle again at how silly this all was

It was nice, for a moment neither of you felt sad or worried nor guilt for your lasting feelings. You and he were just best friends again, laughing at yourselves and enjoying the others company

Remus’ looks down at the slippers, laughing again that you must have taken the second to slip them on before running though “Are you wearing my slippers?” he asks to confirm, mostly because he enjoyed your slight eye widen and shy look away towards your own feet

“Little bit” you wiggle them, now pretty much hanging off and you giggle as the right one does just that “Didn’t want to come barefoot” you defend, wiggling the other one off before looking back at him

He just smiles “So in your attempt to save me you thought charging through lookin’ like a mini moony bugs hybrid was the answer?” he eyes the jumper, but mostly enjoys how the colour brought out that little bit of colour in your iris’

He missed those eyes of yours, they were the thing he remembered most about full moons back at Hogwarts, sure he could still picture all of his friends (and no longer friends) ones, but yours were the nicest, they always made moony feel calm

“Well…” you giggle, cheeks feeling hot “When you say it like that I do seem silly” you admit, shifting onto your side before shifting back “Nope that’s not as comfy” you shake your head, laughing

He laughs too “It’s fine. I think we’re about even when it comes to silliness…I mean I did fall off the couch”

“That’s what happened?” you look up about to laugh but then feel your heart sink at the singular pillow and no blanket “I’m so sorry Moony I stole your bed” you apologise

He shakes his head moving onto his side before shuffling back “Yes but…merlin you’re right...we should buy a carpet” he chuckles as do you just a little before he continues “The couchs a pull out, I was just too lazy to do it” he assures you “And if it makes you feel better I was awake when I fell off, was just too lazy to get up properly and hence suffered the consequences”

You smile at that

“Silly wolf” you tease

He scoffs “Just copying you silly bunny” he nudges his elbow into your side a little and earning the same in return

Your head turns back to the ceiling, as does Remus’, both smiling as you enjoy the peace, hands still interlinked while yours thumbs trace over the others knuckles

“You’re looking at the crack, aren’t you?” he asks after a minute, eyeing the rather big crevasse that honestly made the cottage look like it was going to fall down

“Hard not to” you turn to him briefly and cringe

“Been on the list to fix since I got here but with missions I was too busy, and when I wasn’t the moon would floor me…the feckin’ things just mocking me now I swear” he shakes his head at it

“Yeah…if you look closely the cracks spell fuck you moony!” you lift your hand and gloss across 

“It actually does!” he insists “Not just that but the whole house does right down to that hideous fecking lamp” he points your laced hand towards it

Your eyes drift to the quite rightly named lamp, it was an eyesore, clashed with the entire room. It was like someone hadn’t let go of a questionable style choice from the early 70s

“How long is the list?” you inquire, something in your stomach telling you it would help

“Merlin, I don’t know at this point it’s in the kitchen drawer” he lazily gestures in the direction before turning to you “I’d show you but that involves getting up” 

You both start giggling again “The floor is surprisingly comfortable” you nod, shoogling your arse a little 

“It really is, doing wonders for my back too” he does the same, turning to smile at you

You tap your head on his shoulder, about to say something when your stomach grumbles “I can’t even deny it can I?” you press your lips together

“Nope” he pops the ‘p’ “Although it would have been nice if you waited a few minutes. Was just getting…oi...comfy” he adds with a chuckle and earns a nudge to his side again as you both sit up

Remus lets go of your hand, standing up with a grumble and groan as if he’s an old man, chuckling when you do the same, the pair of you one ‘my back’ away from being so. He holds his hand out when you’re on your knees and helps you to your feet, before leading you over to the table

Taking a seat you watch Remus go to the fridge, pulling out some tupperware filled with pasta and you snigger 

“Pasta for breakfast?” you raise an eyebrow “More accurately cold pasta” you press your lips together, holding back the amusement

He chuckles, going into a drawer and pulling out two forks “Problem?” he asks, head tilted as he places a fork and tupperware in front of you

You smile at him, piercing a few bits of pasta and putting them in your mouth, face faltering as you try to figure out if you like it or not but ultimately smile one more

“None” you swallow, going back in for more

He takes a seat beside you, picking up some pasta and eating it, face going through the same emotions as you before he accepts it

“You know, if anything, this would be one of the more ordinary things we’ve done together” you note before shoving some more pasta in your mouth, stomach happy it was finally getting feed

Remus is happy too, so glad to see you eating and he supposes himself, because he knew without you he wouldn’t have been either

“True” he nods with a chuckle “You remember back in what? Second year. When we figured out the three eyed witch statue lead to Honeydukes and we got stuck in there overnight?”

“Oh my god yeah” your nose crunches up at the memory you had forgotten about until now, every detail coming back “Should have been the best day of our lives, all the goodies we could ever want, a childhood dream even, and what did we do?” you eye him

“Tip there tank of bat blood soup all over us…put me off for life” he shrugs his shoulders cringing

“It was your fault” you quip, eating some more

He swirls in his seat “My fault?” he scoffs “How was it my fault?” he points the fork at you playfully

“You were the one that wanted the good chocolate from the top shelf!”

“You wanted it too!” he defends with a laugh

“Not as much as you Mr chocoholic” you scrunch your nose and wiggle it at him, before poking his stomach lightly

“Says you little miss bunny” he swats your hand and pokes back making you squeal and giggle “Bet you won’t last one week here before your out in that garden nibbling on my cabbages…oh and don’t get me started on the carrots or the…” he starts to ramble but is soon cut off

“Cabbages!?” you look at him in sheer shock “Carrots!?”

His cheeks start to tint “Ugh…well…I…ugh” he stutters for an explanation before sighing “I garden…bugs?” he admits quietly, cheeks bright pink when he realises you’ve stood up and ran over to the kitchen window, half climbing on the counter 

Peering out you could see the small patch set aside for growing fruit and veg. You’d never admit it but you were actually quite interested in those carrots, as well as most things in that garden. Ever since you became an animagus you became obsessed with all thing’s veggie, adored wild flowers above all else, and even slept in a little ball like a bunny would

“Oh my god moony…” you turn back “…you’ve turned into a lil granny!” you exclaim in a fit of giggles before turning back and climbing fully up on the counter to get a better look

Meanwhile Remus poked his cheek with his tongue, accepting the justified teasing of a 21-year-old wizard par taking in gardening. The patch was originally his grandmothers, she used to grow things before she died and the patch was left to overgrow until he moved back and spend months fixing it. Yet. He didn’t know why he did. Gardening had never been on his hobby list but he found peace in it, a sense of control even that he had never been granted, though, on the other hand it was a killer on his already achy knees

Merlin maybe I am a granny

“Oh my god there’s labels and everything!” you gasp, bouncing up and down, enjoying this way too much

“Alright alright” he stands up, chair scraping a little but you’re too busy to care nor notice, getting closer you lean forward jumper riding upwards and he sees it “Bugs?” he asks with inflection

You sit back on your legs, turning a little to look down at him “Yeah?”

“Are you wearing my boxers too?” he comments, now he really was just amused

Your face is a picture, biting your lip as you swivel round and let your legs dangle over the counter, pulling the hem of the jumper down as you do

“Mad?” is all you say, asking but really you knew he wouldn’t be, in fact you’d never seen him really mad at you, only play mad or moon mad…and yes that’s exactly what you think it would be

“Never” he shakes his head, walking up to the counter, ready to ask why you felt the need to where his underwear and not your own, only to frown when his hands finding your knees “Cold?”

You shake your head “Don’t think I am…wait” you sit with it for a minute, suddenly aware of the goosebumps on your legs and how chilly they are compared to Remus’ hands that were practically hot water bottles “Can I borrow some trousers too?” you give him a cheesy grin

He had to admit to that tiny part of him that you did look sweet in his clothes and that he’d love you wearing them, and perhaps wore them nicer than he did…no, you were definitely did, perfect even, you certainly pulled off the old welsh granny aesthetic

He chuckles “Sure bugs” he nods “I know boxers are comfier, as is everything I own” he wiggles his eyebrows and you giggle whilst nodding in agreement “But what’s wrong with your clothes?” he wonders and has to ask

He didn’t mind what the answer was though. You had been stealing all of their clothes since first year, and on occasion them yours, so he only wondered if it was just a comfort thing for you in order to feel safe again, and if it was, he could already feel his heart swelling

“I forgot to pack any” you confess shyly

“Underwear? Or clothes in general?” he questions

“Underwear” you confirm

He looks a little surprised “You forgot?” he chuckles a little while his hands slip down, gently beginning to rub up and down, making sure you stay warm since he hadn’t lit the fireplace yet

“Yeah” you giggle with a cringe “I mean I was in a little bit of a rush to get away from…umm” you swallow hard

And just like that the mood shifted, a wave of grief washing though, sweeping the happiness away like it was never there and sending both of you tumbling back down

“Sorry” he whispers as if it was somehow his fault for asking, sounding like the wind just got knocked out of him, head hanging low as his thumbs rub circles into your calves in order to stay somewhat grounded

“It’s okay…not your fault” your voice is as low as his, so sad it breaks both of your hearts “I feel guilty now” you confess, tears forming in the corners of your eyes

His eyes meet yours, trying to hold his own and stay strong but eventually he lets them flow as you do.

It felt wrong to laugh, to smile, to joke around. Your best friends died less than a week ago, the love of your life being the one to doom them all. You shouldn’t be happy. You shouldn’t okay even for a second. 

The grief crushed your chest, but the guilt was the most suffocating

“Me too” Remus manages to get out, leaning forward to kiss your forehead, lingering there for a moment

Remus was used to guilt, but this was something else. Even worse was he knew Prongs would have wanted you both to laugh and heal, so would Lily and Peter, Marlene and Dorcas, Alice, Frank if they could understand, yet his entire being refused to listen. 

“Why did he do it?” you ask, though you aren’t really asking, more thinking out loud and all Remus can think to do is hug you, stepping between your legs and wrapping his arms around you tightly

“I really don’t know” he holds you as tight as he can without hurting while your arms remain loose, your whole body unable to move like you were paralysed “I really don’t know” he repeats a little quieter and for himself, pain shooting down his arms, as his hand cups the back of your head trying to soothe himself and you

You don’t move but he can feel the tears hitting his shoulders until eventually your arms clutch onto him, legs wrapping around his own like you're afraid he'll disappear

“I don’t know how I’m going to get through this moony” you say after a while, sniffling so much it runs down your lips

He pulls back, eyes shining with tears, redden cheeks glistening but he doesn’t wipe them, instead he takes the corner of his jumper in his thumb and wipes yours instead, along with the snot covering lips and nose softly 

“Me neither” he confesses as he finishes

Your nose wiggled a little after as you tried to stop the tears, an endearing trait though sad as your hands gently cup his face, thumbs gliding across his cheeks to wipe his own tears

“You won’t leave, right?” you ask, hands settling on the sides of his neck, expression near pleading

He stares at you for a second, baffled you even had to ask that, but then he realises why and it kills him all over again

“Never” he moves a little closer, hands cupping over yours “You’re stuck with me for the rest of your days now” he tries to smile at the end, jest and make you feel better, so relieved when it actually seems to help

“Until we really are old grannies?” you smile a little and he nods, giggling quietly but you cringe when some snot tumbles out again “I’m sorry” you apologise as he instinctively goes to wipe it again with his sleeve

“It’s just boogers” he tells you but then laughs “Saying booger sounds weird when you’re 21 doesn’t it”

“Since when did we care about weird?” you counter and he gives you a look that says ‘good point’

Remus removes himself from your grasp, heart aching at your little pout as he moves to fetch some kitchen roll, tearing off a couple of pieces, but it warms again when he returns and your legs wrap loosely around him once more 

He holds the paper up to your nose “Blow” he instructs

“I’m not a child” you mumble but do it none the less

He chuckles, folding up the snotty sheet before doing the same for himself with the spare “You aren’t a child” he blows his nose again before crunching both up and placing them beside the sink for now “You’re a bunny” he tells you

“Technically I’m a wild rabbit ya know…bunny was just because I was still growing” you remind him, rolling your eyes

“You’ll always be a bunny in my eyes bugs” he takes a moment to look at you, then back into the Livingroom before he removes himself once more and goes to another drawer

“What are you looking for?” you hop off the counter, wiping the rest of tears from your face with the back of your hand 

Remus rummages for a second, occasional ‘nopes’ and ‘not it’s’ leaving his lips before he pulls out a small folded bit of paper. Turning back to you as he unfolds it

“What is it?” you tilt your head but instead of answering he just hands it over

You scan it, realising this was the list he was talking about earlier and giggling at some of them 

“I have to love that you’ve checked off buy enough food to live as a hermit but not finishing the list itself” your eyes go back to him, seeing him scratch the back of his neck

“In my defence, you have to admit me having enough food in storage we would never have to leave for like a year was good foresight…” you find yourself nodding, it was indeed good foresight as you didn’t think either of you were ready for people or the outside world again, the train was bad enough “…and this cottage is also falling apart quicker than I can fix it” he admits a little sadly, it was clear he loved the house, yet with the war and his condition he just couldn’t keep up

“Some of these may take until we are grannies ya know”

“We can start small…work out way up” he notes with a shrug, looking away and out of the window towards the broken down and overgrown greenhouse while you look up at him quizzically 

You didn’t know why you were so surprised, your head was thinking the same thing yet you just had to ask “What?” 

He turns to see your eyebrows furrowed, and he was almost ready to backtrack and say sorry for just assuming you would help him but then he stops himself. He knows this will help you, and in turn him...and he's sure you know that too

“It’ll give us something to do, and distract us from…everything” he says instead, eyes flicking between yours, he doesn’t need to hear your reply because he knows you, he can read those eyes better than himself, so he’s thankful you agree 

“Keep our minds busy”

“Exactly” he nods

“Can I add something to the list?” you ask, not wanting to intrude, this was Remus’ home after all and you were merely a welcome squater

“Anything” he says right away, grabbing a pen from the sill open drawer beside him and handing it over

“Thanks moons” 

He just smiles back, watching as you place the parchment on the counter and start writing. He moves next to you, hand on your shoulder as he awaits on you finishing 

“Washing? I was expecting an extension or your own bedroom” he chuckles but they stop when he sees your unease “Bugs?” he cups your cheek as you look up

“My clothes still smell of him” the tears are back, not as bad as before yet somehow you looked more broken “I’m so pathetic” you look down

“Bugs” he tries to coax your face back up but you head only lowers

“No I am” you sink down to the floor and he follows suit, kneeling before you

“Bugs” he tries again

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me Moony, one minute I’m fine, the next I feel guilty, and sometimes I can’t feel anything, others everything” you suck a breath getting overwelmed, face crunching like you’re in pain and you are, head stinging at the pressure “My emotions are so over the place I feel like I’m losing it” you head drops into your hands and Remus intends to rub your back until your ready to talk again, however when your nails begin to dig into your skin he intervenes

You stare up at him after that, watching him grip your hands but he doesn’t scold you, merely rubs your fingers before saying

“Come with me”

“Where?” you inquire as he stands and pulls you up with him

“Just come” is all he says and you follow, one hand still in his while the other grabs the list

He leads you through the house and towards a door, opening it you see a study, or what used to be one. There were book and torn pages littering the floor and desk, torn up in what seems like a fit of rage. The phone was broken too, now hanging off of the receiver on the wall. Ink spilled and dried across wooden desk and floor, photos of who you can only assume are him smashed on the floor, along with a mug, once filled with coffee which was splattered across it all with droplets still clinging to the window

You realised this must have happened last night, when Mary called and he found out. You had a similar rage, but that was after the Mistry had been and gone and you made a point to break everything, leaving the flat in a complete disarray, shakily packing whilst trying not to cut your feet on the shatter glass of the many photos you once proudly displayed but where not ashamed of

“Oh moony” you coo, hugging into him, cheek pressed against the side of his chest

His arm comes around you “Do you think any less of me?” he asks, half in favour of the point he was trying to make and the other terrified you may really think so, it wasn’t a pretty sight, it was like he was barring his inner turmoil before you

“Nothing you do could ever” you say firmly

He turns suddenly at that, scaring you a little until his arms engulf you. A murmur of what you think is ‘I love you’ leaving his lips and so you murmur it back, earning a kiss to your temple

When he pulls away he steps further into the room, sock clad feet being sure to avoid the glass “This was my favourite room” he states, fingers glazing over the hardback of one of many torn books 

Your eyes follow his movements then return to his face, squatting down to pick up a pen and adding the study onto the list “We’ll make it new again…someday” you wish you could hug him again but your bare feet stop you from moving any closer

“Yeah” he nods, walking back towards you, taking your hand in his and remains silent for a little while “We should try to do at least one thing today”

“We could try…” you begin but he shakes his head

“I’m not ready yet” he gives you a sad smile “Don’t know when I will be” 

You nod, taking a couple steps back and gently pulling him with you “Let’s get out of here then” he follows suit and closes the door behind him, looking relieved as he does 

Your hand leaves his as you approach the living room, perching yourself on the end of the couch

Flicking open the list you hand it out towards Remus “You want to choose?” you offer when he grasps on to it

“Sure” he skims the list “One each?” he proposes

“Only fair” you smile and his lips quirk up too

“How about I wash your clothes and you change the shade of that horrid lamp” he nods to it

Your heart warms “Sounds like a good plan” 

Before starting your tasks, Remus makes you finish breakfast as well as ensures the two of you drink something and stay hydrated. Nothing much is spoken, but it’s a comfortable silence, made up of the two of your forks piecing food while your free hands held the each others.

After eating and cleaning up you follow him into the bedroom to get yourself some bottoms, sitting on the bed whilst Remus looks for some.

He takes out a couple looking at them then you before finally choosing one, closing the drawer and handing it to you “These should fit, there one of the elastic ones I never really wear cause they rub against new scars” he tells you and you nod “Which drawers did you put your stuff in?” he wonders, walking back over while you stand up

“The second I think, and some in the bottom” you reply before shimming into the checked pyjama bottoms

He opens the drawers, smiling as he sees the clothes before picking them up and placing them in a nearby basket “Your shit at folding” he teases going back in for more

“Fuck off I was tired” you try to walk over but slip a little on the ends of his trousers “Okay these may be a little long...”

“Think you’re just short” he quips, continuing to place the clothes but does stop briefly to chuckle at your cute yet mad pout

“If I could get to you without falling you’d be so dead right now” you warn and he laughs more, continuing his work while you begin folding the ends upwards, having to do it a few times until they reach your ankles

“I know I would, I haven’t forgotten the black lake incident of 73” he chuckles, breathing in through his teeth as he remembers how you kicked the asses of boys twice your size alongside James

“Damn right I’m a badass...even without magic” your hands find your hips, looking rather proud of yourself

He turns to you, chuckling at the turned-up ends and your look of pride “Well miss badass bunny let’s see if you can change the shade for us” 

You scrunch your nose at him “You always have to get the bunny thing in there don’t ya” you cross your arms

“Well it is a defining character trait” he picks up the basket, laughing at your face and staring at you intently before you crack under it and being giggling as well

Remus walks out of the bedroom “Where’s the spare shade?” you wonder, following along behind him

“Closet beside the front door” he says, heading over and into the kitchen but he stops just before he’s out of view, watching you walk over to the door “Other one” he calls and you do a 180 yelling back ‘I knew that’

An hour or so had, most of the clothes now out on the line to dry while Remus hand washed some of your more delicate shirts as well as the two jumpers to prevent them getting itchy. 

He scrubs the material gently, sitting at the backdoor, a pillow beneath his arse while his legs almost wrap around the large basin. He stops after a minute though, realising you’ve been awfully quiet and the panic sets in, stomach turning. 

He wrings out the shirt, placing it down slowly before standing up and walking around to check on you. Merlin was he glad he did, the sickness fading into amusement as he finds you sitting on the floor yourself, staring at the lamp like it’s your greatest enemy

“This may hurt” you hold up some scissors, warning the inanimate object before you grab it by the neck and begin trying to cut the metal rod of the shade off

“Oh my god it’s working!”

You smile at the progress, in all honestly you thought you were going to fail after hours minutes of trying to twist and pull the thing off, only thing you had succeeded at was taking the bulb out and not dropping it…though there was probably still time

“Shit” you huff realising that it was not in fact working and you had only cut through the layer of paint

Placing the scissors on the coffee table you pout at the lamp once more, going back in once more in case a miracle had occurred. After a few minutes you suddenly decide to turn the thing that holds the bulb, mouth agape when actually it come off

“You’re shitting me…you clever little fucker”

You place the cylindrical holder to the side, face growing excited as the shade finally comes off

You hadn’t noticed Remus, if you did you would have seen him, lips pushed together and tears almost pricking his eyes with how hard he was holding in his laughter, fully entertained by the situation 

The next part was easy, slipping on the much nicer ripped cream shade and placing the holder back in to secure it all. After giving it a good shake to check it wasn’t going to fall or come off off you stand and place it back in its original position. Bending down, plugging it in and flicking on the main switch beside it, before going to do the same on the lamp itself...

But it doesn’t work

“Huh?” your fingers push the little button back and forth “What…” you step back to check the plug is indeed on at the outlet before fiddling again “Oh god I’ve broken it…how the hell have I done that?” you look at the thing baffled, lifting it up to check inside but nothing works, even taking it apart and putting back together did nothing, staring at it for a good few minutes before realising…

You never put the blub back in

“Oh my god!” 

You press your hands into your face, cheeks heating as laughter engulfs you, throwing your head back and that’s when you spot Remus holding his own in before he just starts sniggering

“How long?”

“Since you tried to decapitate it” he chuckles through the words “You’re special you know that right?”

“I’m starting to realise that, yes” you have to agree, walking back over to the coffee table “I looked inside it and everything moony” you don’t know whether to laugh or cry as you pick up the thing that was wrong 

“I have to admit that’s the best thing I’ve ever witnessed…you’re face when you realised will be something I remember forever” he shakes his head, moving over to flick off the power at the socket while you put back in the bulb

“I’m glad my pain amuses you” you say a little strained as you pop it back in “You’re never going to let me forget that are you?”

“Never. I only wish I had a camera so I could show our non-existent children” he jokes and you start giggling “Ready?” he looks at you and when you nod he flicks back on the power, and sure as shit it lights up

“I did it” you say after the laughter dies down and your eyes water “Merlin I feel so silly” 

“I mean it did take you over 10 minutes to realise you forgot” he taps his shoulder with yours 

You turn up to him “Not that” you say and his face softens “I know that was silly. I mean...I feel silly that I may cry that I actually did something...productive...good” you admit, feeling a little in limbo as you float between staying grounded and sinking to the floor in tears

“You aren’t silly for that bugs” he shakes his head “Something as small as that is good for us …just like me washing is one too. Come here” he hithers and you fall into his chest, arms slithers around his torso

“Thank you for letting me stay, I have no idea where I would have been if you hadn’t been here”

“Of course” he kisses your forehead before his hand tilts your head up to look at him “Mary didn’t tell you I was here, I'm sure she said she was going to phone you?” he looks a little confused "Though I didn't really hear much after...you know"

“I must have missed it, I left really early, so early I was at the station for like 3 hours and fell asleep briefly before the train” you shrug, looking down a moment “I was having a breakdown that night...for the merlin knows what-th time. Eventually, I slumped down to the floor and eyes landed upon an envelope from a letter you sent me in like first or second year before your parents moved”

“You travelled all this way on that?” he couldn’t believe it, nor could he believe how much faith you still had after all this time, you really were the strongest of them all  

You nod “Crazy isn’t it?”

“Yeah, but we built our reputations on it” his lips form a downturned smile

Yours does the same before resting your head on his chest, while his chin does the same on your head

“That we did” you nod into him “It’s going to get worse again isn’t it?”

“Much worse��� he answers honestly and your grips grow tighter “Least we aren’t alone”

“Misery enjoys company” you let out an empty laugh, as does he

“That she does”  

Thank you for reading and let me know if you want tagged in the series ♡

@mrsgweasley @zmxchs @moony1-960 @violetsandroses8 @pega7sus @pussy-drunk @thecraziestcrayon @milivanili99 @katlovesall @burntoutbi @summer-noir

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