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phantom-curve · 3 years

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45 from the prompt list please for juke, happy Birthday to you!!!

Thank you! I clearly have not tortured these two enough so please enjoy this angsty Juke whump that ultimately has a happy ending because what other type of ending is there?! Set in a post-canon AU where Julie brings the boys back to life.

#45: feeling their temperature

Julie had been learning a lot about how to deal with various phantom related issues in the last few months. She had learned that the boys needed constant touch and reassurance that they were somehow solid to her, mostly in the form of Luke pulling her into a hug at the end of practice or Reggie throwing himself on top of her while she was sprawled out on the couch doing homework or Alex’s fingers just gently running across the back of her shoulders or the skin of her elbow when she would walk past him at any given time. She had learned that Luke missed meatball subs more than anything, and that Reggie was still sad that that one pizza place on the pier had shut down, and Alex secretly wished he could eat cheese one last time despite the way it had always made him sick when he was alive. She had learned that in the aftermath of their literal magical hug the boys had started getting tired enough to occasionally sleep again and sometimes they didn’t quite phase through things the way they used to and for some reason their poofing had become a touch unreliable.

She was trying to roll with it as much as she could, which was actually a lot given she’d kinda just been rolling with it ever since they appeared in her mom’s studio and turned her life upside down in the best way. But something she hadn’t planned for was illness.

It didn’t make sense, after all. They were ghosts. There was no reason they should get sick, especially given the fact that they weren’t, ya know, real physical entities unless she was touching them. So, it didn’t make sense that they were able to get fevers or sore throats or be congested. She hadn’t planned for it, had written it off as a definite impossibility. Until Reggie half-poofed into her bedroom, flickering in and out slightly so she only caught every other word.

“Julie! ...quick...Luke...not...good...need...help...please!”

And she went immediately, racing down the steps and out the back door to the studio before Reggie had a chance to appear in her bedroom again.

The boys looked absolutely exhausted as she crashed into the studio, Reggie collapsed in one of the chairs breathing heavily and Alex pacing so fast she was sure he was going to wear a groove into the concrete floor. Luke was stretched out along the couch, his face red and sweaty, and he was the only one that looked unhappy at her arrival.

“Julie, thank God,” Alex breathed out, his steps slowing ever so slightly as he made eye contact. “Luke is...sick? Do ghosts get sick? Is that possible? I tried to poof up to you but...it wouldn’t work. Why wouldn’t it work? Reggie said he kept flickering? Did you understand him, or did he just disappear? Oh God, why doesn’t the afterlife come with rule books!?!”

Reggie, bless him, tried to fill in some of the gaps.

“I dunno how much I was actually able to say up there, but something is wrong with Luke. We’re pretty sure he’s sick.”

“Am not!” Luke tried to yell from his spot on the couch, but he barely managed to get the two words out before he was doubled over gasping for air. As if any of them were actually breathing.

“He’s been like this all day.”

It didn’t take a genius or supernatural expert to see that Luke was not his normal bouncy self. Julie approached him slowly, not wanting to make things worse but desperate to affirm for herself that he was still here with her and would be okay at the end of whatever this was. Obviously, none of them actually knew if he would be, but at least if she was touching him, she would have the physical reassurance of his presence. She lowered herself next to his head, resting on her knees beside the couch. He turned glassy eyes her way, groaning and twisting over on his side so he was as curled into her space as he could be while still on the couch.

“Luke...?”

She tried desperately to keep the fear from her voice. The last thing the boys needed was for her to lose it, but she wasn’t sure she managed it. Losing the boys, losing Luke, was her number one fear since she had realized how much they all meant to her. It was a fear that had become even more real when she had watched them be nearly jolted from existence thanks to Caleb, her touch somehow being the one thing that had managed to save them. As if spurred on by that memory, she reached out to let one hand trail across Luke’s forehead and down to rest against his cheek. His skin was like fire beneath her touch.

“You’re burning up. Have you been hot like this all day?”

One side of his mouth tipped up, a half-hearted smirk curving his lips.

“I’m always hot, Jules. Didn’t think you’d ever notice.”

It took everything in her not to roll her eyes. But then Luke gasped and coughed, the sound deep and throaty in a way she hadn’t experienced since the time Carlos got pneumonia when he was little. She fluttered her fingers above him, not sure where her touch would be helpful or comforting. Luke reached up to snag her hands within his own, pulling them close against his chest. Julie tried not to focus on the way his skin seemed to be boiling beneath her.

“That cough doesn’t sound good. Have you taken anything? Ibuprofen, Tylenol, ice cold water??”

She was grasping at straws here. Whatever was going on with Luke was completely out of her wheelhouse, but she would be damned if she let some weak human virus or bacterial infection be his downfall. She had saved him from a goddamn demon’s curse, she could save him from this.

“No, Julie, I’m fine. I swear.”

His promise was cut off by another hacking cough. Julie tried to pull her hands back, if only so that she could use them for something other than just grasping onto Luke’s, but his grip held firm.

“Luke,” she tried again, pushing the tears she felt clogging her throat back, “you’re not fine. Please, I just...I need...there has to be something I can do.”

Their eyes met and held. She watched the way the emotions swimming in the sea of Luke’s gaze shifted and changed. Felt it deep within her soul when he decided to give up the façade and let her in.

“I don’t...it doesn’t feel right, Jules. It’s not like I’m sick, not like...”

Not like when he was human. The words hung unspoken between them. Julie felt her heart dive straight into her toes.

“Can we just...can you just...hold me?”

Luke’s voice came out in broken starts and stops, like the request was being dragged from his bones in a last-ditch attempt at satisfying a final craving before the very end. Julie thought her heart might explode, especially when her eyes searched his face and found nothing but longing and love etched into the pained lines there. It hit her then. He didn’t think this was something survivable. He didn’t think he was going to come back from this. Luke was facing the end, the actual end, and he wanted her at his side and in his arms when he went to meet his maker. The very idea ripped her soul in two.

“No, no, no. No, Luke, no. This isn’t...you’re not...no. You don’t get to do this to me. Not now. Not after...no.”

Julie felt the tears well up and spill over, wet tracks inching down her cheeks in the worst kind of betrayal. Not after everything she had done to save him. Not after she realized she loved him. It wasn’t fair. Luke didn’t get to just leave her like this. She wouldn’t allow it. Luke’s own eyes flooded, the two of them so in tune that when she blinked again her tears traced down her face in the same pattern that his did.

“Julie...please...”

He was pulling on her then, using their conjoined hands and his superior upper body strength to drag her up and onto the couch. Julie did her best to wedge herself into the space beside him, but Luke was having none of that, dropping her hands so he could twist his fingertips into her belt loops and haul her body on top of his. It was the kind of intimate cuddling she had been dreaming about for months, even before she had been able to touch him. Her head was tucked securely beneath his chin, cheek resting above the space his heart had once occupied. His arms were locked around her waist, hands solid and reassuring against the small of her back. She let her hands slip past the worn cotton of his cut-up band tee to rest against his ribs, the tears flowing fast and hot from her eyes to soak the material beneath her head.

She wasn’t sure Luke would even notice the difference. His temperature had to be sky high, every inch of his body where it pressed against hers engulfed in flames. Without realizing it, she began to hum the chorus to Edge of Great. She had been using it recently as a way to hype herself up when she started doubting something, the song never failing to remind her of Luke’s unbreakable belief in her. She felt it when Luke smiled, his head leaning down to rest against her own, voice blending with hers in a perfect harmony.

“We were pretty great, huh?” Luke’s voice was hushed as his lips moved across her scalp. “The band...the boys...us. We went right over the edge together, didn’t we? We’re just one dream, away from who we’re meant to be.”

Julie lost the melody as her quiet cries shifted to sobs. This couldn’t be it. They hadn’t even achieved half of the things they were meant to. Luke’s hum picked up where hers had dropped off, shifting slowly into the bridge of Finally Free.

“You’ll always be a part of me. Now ‘til eternity.”

Luke’s words were quiet and soft, melodic, as if he was still following the lines of the song in his head. There was a kind of peace to them that Julie hadn’t heard before, not since that awful night where he had stood before her and said there was no music without her. Not since the last time he thought she was going to have to watch him die. Not since the last time he had tried to say goodbye.

She couldn’t let him go like this. She had to fight, somehow, some way, to keep him where he belonged, right here next to her. She didn’t know what was happening, didn’t know how to fix it, but she could give him this. She could tell him how much he meant to her. She could hope that it would maybe be enough. Just like last time.

“Luke...I can’t...I’m not...” Her chest constricted, cutting off her words. God, how did it already hurt so much? “I’m not ready to lose you. I can’t lose you. I love you.”

Luke convulsed slightly underneath her, the movement moving from the tip of his head all the way down to his toes. Julie hugged him close, terrified. She wasn’t sure if that type of reaction was a good thing or a bad thing, and she wasn’t fully ready to find out. Beneath her, Luke’s body began to rapidly cool. That had to be a bad sign, right? A fever like that wouldn’t just suddenly break, not unless...not unless...Julie couldn’t even make herself think it. She pulled herself tighter against Luke’s chest, leveraged every inch she could get against him as her hands flexed against his back. A strange noise sounded from deep within his chest.

“Luke? Please, Luke, no. Please don’t leave me.”

Julie clutched herself as close as possible, the feeling of Luke’s arms slackening on her back twisting her stomach. Her sobs were borderline uncontrollable now, breaths coming in painful gasps as she pushed her face deeper and deeper into the fabric of Luke’s shirt. I love you, I love you, I love you. Her mouth formed the words over and over again until she felt them stitch themselves into the lining of her soul.

The noise sounded again, louder this time, directly underneath the spot where her cheek rested against his left pectoral muscle. And then she heard it again, and again, and again, slowly repeating until it picked up a slight rhythm. Slow at first and then explosively fast all the sudden. It sounded...like a heartbeat.

“Luke, oh my God, Luke, please, please, oh my God, please.”

Julie had no idea what she was even pleading for. A sign, a glimmer of hope to hold on to, another miracle that would save the boy she loved and bring him back to her, fully this time. It was too much to ask for, right? Too much to put faith into. The sound, the heartbeat, within Luke’s chest began to echo even louder. Julie forced herself to be brave. Forced herself to lift her head and look at Luke’s face. She told herself she could handle it. She told herself she had to do it.

Luke’s eyes were open above her. He looked just as bewildered as she felt, but his eyes were open and she could see his nostrils flaring as he sucked in a breath, and she felt the lungs in his chest expand beneath her and he was alive. He had to be alive, right? That was the only explanation here.

“Julie...?”

“Are you...?”

“I feel...”

“Alive.”

They said it at the same time, voices blending together the same way they did on stage, perfectly matched as if the universe itself had made it so. Julie pressed one hand against his cheek, his normal temperature cheek, and the other against his chest, directly above his heart. She felt the steady thump of muscle against her palm, felt Luke’s lips stretch into the widest grin she had ever seen. His own arms tightened around her waist again, forcing her to collapse against him as he squeezed. His heartbeat, his heartbeat!, roared strong and steady beneath her. His lips were in her hair, the only part of him that was still hot, moving against her curls in a way she didn’t have to hear to understand. I love you, I love you, I love you. Tying them together, heart to heart, the knowledge of that truth undeniable and overwhelming. He was alive. He was alive. Luke was alive, at her side, alive alive alive.

“Hey guys?”

Reggie’s voice, strained and aching. Julie had forgotten about the other boys completely. She turned her head, new tears overflowing when she caught sight of them. They looked like Luke had when she entered the studio. But instead of feeling scared, an immense wave of relief crashed over her. She could do this. She loved them. She could bring them back. Julie disentangled herself from Luke, crossing the room to pull the other boys close. Luke followed, his arms encompassing hers, Reggie and Alex safe within a never-ending circle of love. They burned hot and quick, fevers rising and crashing in a wave faster than Luke’s, heartbeats returning just as swiftly. They all cried, limbs overlapping in a heap on the floor. And when Julie met Luke’s eyes above the backs of the other boys, a moment passed between them. A moment that promised a lifetime together, every day beginning and ending with love and them.

“Now that we’re alive again, can we please get something to eat?”

Luke pulled Reggie into a noogie, but Julie just laughed, her heart soaring high as she thought about the endless future stretched out in front of them. A lifetime of forevers, starting that very day.

#oop I'm back on my soft Juke shit #this is the last prompt!#mads writes #brought to you by love and the power of friendship #julie and the phantoms #jatp #juke #jukebox #juke ficlet #jatp ficlet #send me prompts for my birthday!#<- that tag is just for consistency

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lins-fandom-hub · 3 years

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HPHM Profile: Em Wen-Hui Lin

Template by @hogwartsmystory

Profile subject to change.

IDENTITY

Name: Emily “Em” Wen-Hui Lin

Gender: Female

Age: 12 as of May 31, 1990

Birth Date: February 19, 1978

Species: Human

Blood Status: Half-blood (both parents are Muggle-born attending wizarding institutions)

Sexuality: Undetermined

Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Ethnicity: Chinese

Nationality: Um...British, I think?

Residence: Oxford, England

Myer Briggs Personality Type: ISFP

THE MAGE

Wand: Rowan and Phoenix feather, 11 inches, quite flexible

Animagus: N/A. Of the three siblings, only Clara has become an Animagus.

Misc Magical Abilities: Like her siblings, Em is a Legilimens--although she did not recognize the power until late in her 6th year.

Boggart Form: Her inner demons are her downfall. Her Riddikulus form makes the entire room dark, leaving her in the spotlight, standing in front of the glowing column of a Cursed Vault, while shadows of her past begin to echo her worst thoughts. Most of them pertained Jacob’s permanent disappearance, or her older sister abandoning her for good. She just cannot stand the thought of standing there, helpless while her family suffered.

Riddikulus Form: Her Riddikulus form is of the demons popping like soap bubbles all around her, the voices warbled with every bubble that rose. The prevailing darkness will fade as well. The Cursed Vault will become a giant teddy bear.

Amortentia: (What do they smell like?) Freshly ground mint, cinnamon, freshly baked fudge, and tomato juice.

Amortentia: (What do they smell?) She smells fresh linens, nutmeg, smoke from a fire, and...wait, is that honey lemon tea?

Patronus: If she can produce a Patronus, it would be of a black swan. A little strange when compared to Jacob’s falcon and Clara’s unicorn, but her grace and poise is not to be underestimated.

Patronus Memory: the day the tension from the Cursed Vaults finally subsided and she saw the light return to her siblings’ eyes.

Mirror of Erised: She sees herself with her older siblings, both of them genuinely smiling in happiness. Her family has completely reconciled, and she feels at peace.

Specialized/Favourite Spells: Before Em goes to Hogwarts, she knew already of the Herbivicus Charm, which her father taught her to speed up the growth of flowers. This was very useful for her whenever people requested her to make flower crowns at the arts and crafts club she heads along with her friend Dawn. Em can cast a really good Expelliarmus as well--a powerful one that could send the wand flying far away from the owner. In later years, one should watch out for her Tarantallegra and Obscuro. Unbeknownst to several of her classmates, she could also perform a good shield charm thanks to training with her siblings in her first year.

APPEARANCE

Faceclaim: TBD

Voiceclaim: TBD

Game Appearance: (may subject to change every once in a while)

Height: 4’10 at 11, but grows a bit before reaching adulthood

Weight: She is on the slightly light side, lighter than average.

Physique: Relatively frail, but her glare can make up for her strength and power behind her spells.

Eye Colour: Dark brown

Hair Colour: Black

Skin Tone: Pale

Body Modifications: N/A

Scarring: N/A

Inventory: Em carries two silk bookmarks, a beaded bracelet, her wand, a few flower clips, several quills and bottles of ink, and some parchment.

Fashion: Most of the time in school, Em wears her school robes. Yes, even when she’s not in class, she wears her school robes. She would always have a flower in her hair.

ALLEGIANCES

Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff

Ilvermorny House: Pukwudgie/Wampus?

Affiliations/Organizations: Hufflepuff House (Hogwarts); Circle of Khanna (Hogwarts); Order of the Phoenix (1996-); St. Mungo’s Hospital

Professions: Healer at St. Mungo’s

HOGWARTS INFORMATION

Class Proficiencies:

Astronomy: A

Charms: E

DADA: O

Flying: A

Herbology: O

History of Magic: A

Potions: E

Transfiguration: E

Electives: Care of Magical Creatures (E), Ancient Runes (A), Muggle Studies (E)

Quidditch: Em does not join the Hufflepuff Quidditch team, but she is a great supporter of the team in the spectator stands.

Extra Curricular: Arts and Crafts Club (leader), Duelling Club

Favourite Professors: Professor Sprout, Professor Flitwick, Professor McGonagall

Least Favourite Professors: Professor Binns

RELATIONSHIPS

Brother: Jacob Pan-Hui Lin

Although she and Jacob never really were that close, she still admires him for what he does and never held a grudge against him for his mistakes. She longs for them to reunite when she learned he went missing, and always wanted to know him and get along with him.

Older sister: Clara Xing-Hui Lin

Em didn’t really get a chance to connect with Clara until the summer before her first year at Hogwarts. Still, she was firm on helping Clara through her trying times and helped her in any way she could to break the final curse and stop R once and for all.

Father: Sueh-Yen Lin

Mother: Renee Lin (nee Tao)

Love Interest: currently N/A

Best Friends: Dawn Everett, Hillary Redstone,

Rival: Travis Poulter, Eunice Ahn

Enemy: R, Voldemort and Death Eaters

Dormmates: Dawn Everett, three other Hufflepuff girls

Pets: Cheddar (rat), some others TBD

Closest Canon Friends: Penny Haywood, Chiara Lobosca, Nymphadora Tonks, Diego Caplan, Andre Egwu, Charlie Weasley, Fred Weasley, George Weasley, Cedric Diggory, Badeea Ali, Barnaby Lee, Liz Tuttle, Tulip Karasu

Closest MC/OC Friends:

Sarahi Silvers (@dat-silvers-girl )

Nora Magnus (@dat-silvers-girl )

BACKGROUND/HISTORY

Pre Hogwarts:

Em was around 5 or 6 when Jacob disappeared. Since then, all she had known was broken bonds and tears.

Her sister drifted away from her as well in her first 5 years at Hogwarts. She had to learn in this time to stand alone in the worst of the storm.

1st Year:

Em was Sorted into Hufflepuff on the first day at school

The statue curse prevailed during little Em’s first year at Hogwarts

Following the Halloween Feast, Em created the Arts and Crafts club at her friend Dawn’s suggestion--where members create many wonderful things out of everyday items

She and Clara take up Bill’s offer to go to the Burrow for Christmas.

After Rowan Khanna’s death, Em was roped into the Circle of Khanna by Diego Caplan who insisted the group needed her duelling skills

While Clara was preparing the Polyjuice Potion to infiltrate R, Em got to see all the Vaults firsthand that have been broken

Prior to Clara’s trip to the Black Lake with Ben, Merula, and Jacob, Em comes around and gives Clara a flower crown to present to the merqueen

After the curse was lifted, just as Clara threw a party at the Three Broomsticks, Em threw a party in the courtyard with the people who were unable to go to Hogsmeade

2nd Year:

Em returns to Hogwarts for her second year prepared to help her siblings take down the rest of R

3rd Year:

Em returns to Hogwarts without her siblings for the first time. However, it was then when she met the Boy Who Lived--Harry Potter.

The year passed pretty normally for her

4th Year:

When the Chamber of Secrets was opened, little Em was one of the first to ensure that all the younger Hufflepuff students remained calm in this time

She already knew firsthand that Gilderoy Lockhart was suspicious, and so she wrote her mother when he was outed (and his memory was permanently wiped)

5th Year:

Em becomes a Hufflepuff Prefect for her fifth year along with Cedric Diggory

The year that Sirius Black escaped has been a tough one for her. Imagine Percy constantly on high alert, especially since he’s Head Boy--she’s adapted his high alertness once more, fearing for the entire student body once more

Despite all this, little Em came out successful in her OWLs, obtaining an impressive eight OWLs while only failing History of Magic (she dropped Muggle Studies after her 4th year)

6th Year:

Enter: The Goblet of Fire, and the Triwizard Tournament!

Em was too young to participate, so she ended up sitting by the sidelines cheering both her friend Cedric Diggory and Harry Potter on

She did not develop a crush on any of the boys in her year (mostly because she can’t be bothered right now with romance, maybe), but she did go to the ball with another Ravenclaw boy in her year

The loss of Cedric Diggory at the end of her 6th year had put her in another mute grief. First, she sat through Rowan Khanna’s memorial--she didn’t expect to sit through another one five years later, and one for one of her closest friends too.

7th Year:

Prior to starting her 7th year, her older sister Clara left for China

Em becomes one of the Head Girls in her 7th year, but the arrival of Dolores Umbridge and the way she instilled all these regulations made her secretly pissed off

She wholeheartedly supported Fred and George in testing their joke products so that they could make a profit out of their talents

When they left Hogwarts on their broomsticks after a while, she too was one of the few who wished she could leave the school but could not

Order of the Phoenix / 2nd Wizarding War:

Em was roped into the Order of the Phoenix along with her brother, Jacob, by none other than Professor Dumbledore immediately following graduation

While her sister was in China holding back the Japanese forces, the times they had to talk were far and few in between--however, they were able to talk when they could, and Em relayed everything that happened to her through encrypted letters sent to her grandmother

Em was the one who alerted Clara of the upcoming Battle of Hogwarts--while the siege went underway, she stuck close to Diego

Em survives the battle--she mourned for Fred and the many lives that were lost

Post-War:

Em ends up becoming a Healer at St Mungo’s, helping those who have undergone traumatic experiences during Voldemort’s rise

Future relationship TBD.

PERSONALITY

Though she comes off as a shy soul, little Em is not completely fragile. Behind her kind eyes laid years of suffering from her family’s arguments and broken bonds--yet she pushes forward, and her persistence does not go unnoticed

Em is always willing to offer a helping hand, even though she’s the one who needs it most.

She cares deeply for those who she ends up befriending and trusting. This also includes most of Clara’s friends at Hogwarts.

Though soft-spoken and easy to knock over, her spells could pack a serious punch.

MISC

Em’s love of Herbology came from her father, whom she loved helping in the family gardens long before Jacob’s disappearance.

She doesn’t play many instruments like her sister, but she has a decent singing voice good enough to join the Frog Choir. However, the thought of that made Em shake her head--she really only sings for fun, after all.

Em’s love for crafts came from the time Jacob gifted her a Hippogriff ornament at her first Christmas that he made himself.

#hogwarts mystery #hphm #etched engraved everlasting #hphm em lin #so here's the profile for clara's younger sister #for anyone who is interested more or less in learning about her #but she's always open to friends so #hit me up if you want to be friends with the little sister

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dirthavarens · 3 years

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so i’m sick and that means i’m thinking about my warden, champion, and inquisitor when they’re sick and how their LI’s react

Warden Ghilana Surana:

What sickness? This woman could have the actual plague and still be going. She feels like she’s going to pass out? Lmao guess again. She’s downing a lyrium potion and getting right back to business. During the Blight, she caught a cold and Alistair was severely worried because she lost her voice, thus incantations were out of the question. However, in her discomfort, she found great strength, especially as an Arcane Warrior. What she could not use through incantations, she used through her blade, through wards scribed, through sheer intent. She conjures ice to keep her fevers down and when that isn’t enough, detonates the heat as flames around her.

After the Blight (and Alistair leaving her lmao), she spends a great deal of her time adventuring and recruiting with Nathaniel Howe. This means exposure to the elements that is far less than kind. A rogue doesn’t know healing as a mage does, but that doesn’t stop Nathaniel from trying to help.

He’s tender in his care of her, despite her abject protestations. She’s fine. She’s always been fine. She always will be fine. Such resolve can play into her downfall at times.

Just a year before the Breach formed, she took ill while she and Nathaniel were far, far to the North, closer to Tevinter than she’d ever ventured. They had to take shelter in a small, abandoned hut and Ghilana had no energy to do much of anything. She had been staving off the illness for nearly a two weeks through magic alone when it finally caught up with her. She collapsed during a hunt and Nathaniel took her to the nearest shelter he could find.

She slept for days, waking only when he begged her to drink, eat, and down concoctions. The ratios of his potions were almost right, leading her to sleep for too long or have too vivid of dreams.

After all of that, she got out of bed, cleaned herself, and carried on as though nothing had happened. Nathaniel was very, very unhappy, but he knows better than to argue with his angry elvhen wife.

All in All: Very Capable of Handling Herself. Will fight and throw fire as her temperature rises. Will do anything to keep others from worrying, laughs it off when she has to. 12/10

Amelia Hawke, Champion of Kirkwall:

Her boyfriend is Anders. Her symptoms are never allowed to go beyond a stuffy nose.

Just Kidding. There are times she tries to hide it from him. Having Eldest Sister syndrome, taking care of herself usually isn’t high on her priorities. Making sure that her friends stay out of trouble and that her mother is alright are her top priorities. She’s the Mom Friend and her own ailments can wait. When she’s sick, she does her best to mask her symptoms. A light cough can pass as dust from the Lowtown streets. Her stuffy noses can be attributed to allergies.

Oh? That pale, clammy appearance with her glassy eyes? Probably ate something bad and didn’t she say it was allergy season?

Even at her worst, she makes sure to get her rounds in, often collapsing in bed the moment she gets home. Her mother, Bodahn, and Sandal are the only ones who ever see her sweat with fever. On those nights, her mabari stays close. It isn’t often she sees Carver since he left for the Templars but she still sends a care package when Cullen makes mention that he’s ill. Even if her brother hates her, she does what she can.

Over the years, Anders would notice how she would change when she slept. What had been a minor cough turned into a deep rattling in her chest that roused him from sleep. Most times when he heard such a rattle, the outcome was unfavorable. Winter fever was a hard case to cure, but luckily he had the fortune of catching hers early and was able to treat it. Her mabari acted almost like a nurse hound instead of a warhound. For once, Anders was grateful for the dog’s presence.

From that moment on, he made her swear to tell him when she was ill. With great reluctance, she agreed.

All in All: What Sickness? Eldest Sibling Syndrome to the max. She even still takes care of Carver, despite him being a shitty Templar. Big Heart 10/10

Inquisitor Mirani Lavellan:

She sleeps heavily and often when she’s ill. The Fade has always been a comfort to her, even when demons encroach on her weakened body. Naturally, this causes some concern within the Inquisition for the Inquisitor to “sleep on the job” so to speak. But she’s there when she needs to be. Potions, herbal teas, sweaters, and thick pants abound, but she’s there.

Solas is more than happy to comfort her and keep the demons at bay while she rests. He fills her dreams with small secrets and memories of a time long since passed. He knows he shouldn’t but the contented sigh she lets out is worth it, even if it’s through wheezing snores or a stuffed nose.

Mirani is more emotional when sick. She is an Empath with deep connections to the Fade and the forgotten feelings that dwell there. Being ill makes her no small victim to strong emotions, either. Battle is where she feels the strongest, where her magic is purest and most powerful.

Being a Rift Mage gives her access to powers untapped by nearly everyone, save her Trainer and Solas. But calling on the Fade takes a great deal from her when she’s ill, as she has to be wary of manifesting her intentions as energy and not invitations to demons. Her focus and emotional state causes her mana to drain quickly between powerful spells. So much does she expel from herself that Solas stands at the ready to catch her should she fall and sound the retreat.

During the times she had exhausted herself and had to be carried back to camp, she would protest vehemently, saying that she was okay. This gained her nothing but stiff-lips and furrowed brows from her companions. Except for Cole, whose panic was palpable.

She’s naturally freckled and has a great deal of color to her light olive skin. This color increases tenfold when she’s sick. The tips of her nose and ears turn red and her cheeks nearly glow from fever. When sickly and nauseous, her olive hue turns closer to that of pallid elfroot. This doesn’t happen often, though, and she’s thankful.

Mirani never stays sick for long. Only a couple days at most. The longest she was ill was after the fall of Corypheus.

She was down for two weeks, doubtlessly in-part to her fatigued heart and melancholy. Even so, she would find herself dreaming in a place unfamiliar but comforting, like a forgotten lullaby from one’s childhood. A melody she can recall, but never remembers the lyrics. During the days, she’d drag herself from bed and do her best to ignore the ache in her lungs and the incessant pounding in her head. Varric often told her she looked like shit, Bull and Sera were not much kinder. Still, she had paperwork to fill out, memoirs to write, requisitions to approve and deny. The work of the Inquisitor was never done.

With the Anchor growing worse in the two years that pass, she notices her immunities starting to fail. Dorian sends special teas and potions of his own making for her that serve to invigorate her. They work for a while and when they stop being as effective Cole is more than content to keep her company, popping in and out of the Fade when he feels her hurt. It’s harder to help her, knowing that the Anchor is the infection eating away at her.

IF AU HAPPENS: Despite having only one arm, she still holds tightly to her words to Solas and follows him into the Eluvian. Now weaker than before, she knows she has to find a way to restore herself without explicitly asking Solas to mend her. She’s gone two years without his help, despite what she feels for him, and she will continue to find her way. She taps into the natural magic of the Crossroads. Its energy is much like that of the Fade, but purer; its intents are whatever ones wish is and she channels it to build herself back to strength. Solas marvels at her tenacity. She controls old magic so freely, so easily, as though she had always known how to wield it. She feels better than before, healthier than she thought she could after dealing with the instability of the Anchor for two years.

IF AU DOESN’T HAPPEN: After disbanding the Inquisition, Mirani is exhausted and finds that she just wants to be left alone. Now with only one arm, no Inquisition, and no Clan, she ventures deep into the Arlathan Forest. The old magic here feels familiar and she is content to feel it wisp around her like leaves being kicked up by an autumn breeze. Through careful practice and occasional mishaps, she’s able to rehabilitate herself. On her worst nights, however, she would be lulled back into sleep with dreams of foreign memories. The visions were clearer there and the tender emotion encasing her quieted her disturbed soul. The spirits there often seek to help her when she’s in need of aid and Cole occasionally appeared to keep her company, even if he was not explicitly needed.

All in All: Naps, warm clothes, give her tea and a blankie. Very emotional but does what needs doing. Overall, very soft. 7/10 (but 100/10 in my heart)

#personal #dragon age hcs #dragon age #my mage babies

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snowkatze · 5 years

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These Violent Delights

Link to ao3: These Violent Delights Genre: angst and fluff Word Count: 4357 Summary: Simon is watching 'Romeo and Juliet' in Magic History and he watches Baz write something on a paper. Later, Simon finds the paper and sees that Baz wrote a romantic sonnet. Who is he in love with? Includes one quote from Wayward Son but no spoilers. There’s also quotes from 'How Do I Love Thee? (Sonnet 43)' by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, '[i carry your heart with me(i carry it in]' by e.e. cummings, 'Love Sonnet XI' by Pablo Neruda and 'Annabel Lee' by Edgar Allen Poe, and 'Romeo and Juliet' by William Shakespeare.

___

Leonardo DiCaprio is one gorgeous bastard. I've always thought so, when I was watching Titanic with Agatha during the Christmas holidays. (I think she wanted me to hold her hand. Maybe she wanted me to see what an epic romance looks like. I missed the cue. On both accounts.) He also makes one hell of a Romeo. Like, I get why Juliet would lay down her life for him. He's wearing a medieval knight costume to a party on screen. He's got a cheap fake sword, too, but unfortunately, he's not using it. It's not really that interesting, right now. Nobody's getting stabbed. Juliet is so enamored with Romeo. She's such a fool, really. Baz' hair is blocking the corner of the screen. It's fluffed up and soft on top of his head.

I've stabbed goblins, trolls, merwolves, a dragon, once... I've never been to a party. Baz would look good in a knight costume. Or with angels wings. Demons wings, maybe. Is that a thing?

Baz is taking notes, because of course he is. Even when we're watching a movie in class. Penny's right next to me, she's not taking notes. I'm not taking notes. I mean, we all know the story, right? Romeo and Juliet fall in love, their families have a feud that any Family Feud host would keel over because of, in the end they kill each other or something... Baz turns his head, and I can see that his hair falls in a swoop over his forehead. How tragic... Maybe I'll end up stabbing Baz. I just hope he'll - ...

I really should have held Agatha's hand when I had the chance.

I try to drag my gaze back to the screen, but the top of Baz' head is pretty distracting. Maybe he sat in front of me on purpose, so I couldn't see. He knows damn well how tall he is.

Baz is well fit – I mean – Romeo is – I mean – Juliet. No, Agatha. I like Agatha. Merlin, what is wrong with me?

Romeo's not that fit, obviously. I mean, in a way, yeah. In a, I'd like to have arms that strong, way. In a, I'd like to have eyes that bloody gorgeous, what the hell? The director's called Baz, apparently. I didn't know there were people called Baz. Not so unique now, are you, Baz? I guess he's not actually called Baz. I don't suppose there's anyone else called Tyrannus Basilton bloody Grimm-Pitch. Bummer. Baz would make a great director, for sure. He's great at yelling people and ordering them around, for starters. He's also great at everything. Wow, they're talking for so long. Someone stab me. Crowley, his hair is so nice. I want - I want his shampoo. What the fuck is he writing? Is he already doing the homework? Sneaky bastard. Maybe I should call him out. Maybe I should start on the homework.

I start poking Penny with a pencil.

“Sod off,” she says.

I turn back to the screen. There's some argument. Two of the guys start punching each other, Romeo tries to go between them...

“Who's that?” I whisper to Penny. “Tybalt and Mercucio,” she whispers back. “Merlin, have you been watching at all?” A scratch? What is happening? Is this guy dying? My eyes are drawn to the screen. Suddenly, I feel unusually cold.

'A plague on both your houses...' he says... I grip the sleeve of my sweater. I watch as Mercucio dies, I watch as Romeo gets revenge on Tybalt... I watch Romeo and Juliet in the chapel... Baz sits up straight. He has stopped writing. I watch as Romeo drinks posion, thinking Juliet is dead... As Juliet reaches out for him... I thought Romeo's eyes were blue before, but in the close-up of his face when he's dying, they look kind of grey, almost like Baz'... I grip my sleeve tighter. I watch as Juliet shoots herself. But I can't watch the back of Baz' head anymore. I focus on the other corner of the screen and don't look away until the bell rings. What's wrong with dancing and parties? The screen goes black and my gaze snaps back to Baz.

Why does someone always has to get stabbed?

He's shoving his stuff in his backpack, all except for the paper he'd been writing on. He crumples it and throws it in the trashcan by the door. I keep looking at the door, even after he's gone. “Simon?” It's not an inevitability, is it? Romeo and Juliet, dying...

“Simon?” I mean, I knew, of course. Everyone knows. Romeo and Juliet die in the end.

“Simon.” It couldn't go any other way. “Simon!”

I snap my head around. Penny is looking at me. Why is she looking at me? “Simon, are you – crying?” Her eyes turn soft now. I try to unclench my jaw.

“No, I -”

I unclench my hand and touch my cheek. My fingers come back wet. Oh.

“It was just...” I start. “Just such a sad story.”

“It's Romeo and Juliet,” she says. “It's the sad story.” “I know,” I say. “I was expecting it, ob– obviously. But it still – still hit me like a ton of bricks.”

A truckload of bricks. A mountain of them. Even though I was expecting it.

I'm overwhelmed with the urge to count the days left until the end of the school year. How many days before...

I shoot up out of my seat. “How many hours til lunch?” I say and smile at Penny. She smiles back, but I can tell she's still cautious.

“You can't go a minute without thinking about food, can you?” she says and we start walking out of the class room. She tells me about what sentences from Shakespeare she thinks you can still make spells out of. She doesn't notice when I stop at the door. No one's left in the class room. No one sees when I duck down and pick up the crumpled paper Baz put in the bin and shove it in my pocket.

I catch up with Penny.

So, that was that for Magic History. I grab the strap of my backpack a little tighter than I usually would.

I think I'll have sour cherry scones for lunch.

___

After last period, I go to the restroom and perch myself up on the toilet seat. With jittery hands, I pull the crumpled paper from my pocket. I unfold it carefully, then close my eyes. Why did Baz throw this away? It can't just be notes, then. Baz wouldn't throw away his notes, unless he'd copied them carefully into his notebook before. Whatever is on this paper, Baz didn't want anyone to see. It's probably nothing. Just scribbles or maybe a sketch. I shouldn't do this, right? But – it's Baz.

I open my eyes and read. I am your Petrarchan sonnet, you are my Shakespearean tragedy

We are no star-crossed lovers but (You were the sun and I was crashing into you)

Ne'er dare there escape me no greater sigh and ne'er there be a lost soul more forlorn than me, gazing into thy pale blue eye, thou art my most cherished oxy-moron I call you tedious fool though the only fool is me you are my downfall (it's not the only way I fall) How unfair for thy image to be fair

Sanguine, for thy hope, for I am out for blood I will bear this burden, for I am bare

to the snow that burns me, the words that cut I wish we could run, my love runs deep, Fearing how soon we will run out of time Thy face when thou say'st 'wow' makes me say 'woe' I, your antithesis, thou art my rhyme There's no reason Stake my heart, deliver thy killing blow Upend me with bronze curls, torturous lips When thou bitest thy thumb but never thy lips Upend me with smiles, the beauty thou art, fuck you and curse what thou doth to my heart I read it twice. Except for the words he's crossed out, I don't really know what it means. But I do recognize the form and rhyme scheme. We talked about it in Magic History just last week. It's a sonnet. We're watching Shakespeare, and what does Baz do? Write a fucking sonnet. The pretentious arsehole. The complete wanker. Maybe it's a coded message and this is the key to uncovering one of Baz' plots. That would make sense of the fucking gibberish it is. Maybe someone else was meant to pick it up out of the bin. But there'd be easier ways if he wanted to pass something on to Dev or Niall. Maybe he meant for me to find it. No.

I don't fully understand, but my throat runs dry when I read it again. I feel cold again and I bite my lip because I feel like I'll make some noise otherwise. Love. He crossed it out, but it's still there. Baz is talking about love. Aleister Crowley.

Baz doesn't love anyone, or anything. He's a vampire. They can't. Maybe he was making fun of sonnets. Or of Romeo and Juliet. It could be like – creative writing. Fictional. Unreal. But it just feels a little too – honest.

Baz loves his mother. He talks about her like she hung the moon. He loves playing football. He's so fucking good at it, too. He loves school, he puts his entire soul into it. (He has a soul.) He eats Salt and Vinegar Crisps at night.

Crowley. He's in love with someone. No. He's tragically in love with someone. I don't know what to think.

Who? Who would Baz Pitch write tragic sonnets about? Who does he love so much? Is it Agatha? It has to be Agatha. Maybe he thinks he can't be with her. Crowley, why does he make it sound like such a tragedy? He's in love. He should be soaring. He should be happy. He could have anyone. (Well. Not anyone. But it's not like he wants me.) I realize I've hidden here for quite some time; Penny will be worried. I fold the paper carefully in put it back in my pocket. I make my way into the dining hall. Penny is frowning at me, but she's saved me some sour cherry scones.

“Where were you?” she asks.

“What's a Petrarchan sonnet?” I reply.

She pushes the plate with the scones to me.

“They're usually about unrequited love,” her frown deepens. “And they often include oxymorons.” Unrequited love... Baz is in unrequited love? Impossible.

I know what a Shakespearen tragedy is, obviously. It's the plays that don't have a happy ending. The ones that are... tragic. “Oxymoron,” I say. “What's that?”

“It's a self-contradiction. Loving hate, and that kind of stuff. Why? You need help studying? We can meet up later.” “No, it's fine,” I say and start picking one of the scones apart. “Was just wondering.” I am your antithesis... your opposite... Agatha isn't Baz' opposite anything. They're both posh and fancy. Only that Agatha's nice, and Baz is not. (Too much, anyway.)

Stake my heart... That's so dark. Why would Baz write stuff like that? He can have the dances, and the parties, and the fool-headed love. He can have everything.

I wonder why he's underlined the 'moron' in 'oxymoron'. Is he calling them a moron? Maybe they're thick... Baz probably thinks anyone not as smart as him is a moron. That could be anyone, except for Penny.

I've pulled the scone into tiny pieces. I'm not hungry right now, which never happens. But I don't need to eat. I need to know who Baz is in love with. I need to.

“Simon?” Penny says. She's frowning again. “Are you alright? You're not eating?” No.

“Of course. I just, uhm... Need to get some homework done.” “Are you keeping something from me? Remember, no secrets.” “It's... It's not my secret, okay? Just trust me.” If I showed Penny, she could figure out for sure who it's about. But for some reason, I don't want to. Baz is not in the dining room.

___

Baz is sitting on the bed, and all I can think is that he's in love with someone, and he writes sonnets about them, and he calls them moron and the sun and beautiful.

And he thinks he's going to run out of time.

Baz is a hopeless romantic. I didn't think he was before, but now I can see him on candlelight dinners, with roses on Valentine's day, Baz going to the movies, Baz holding hands... Baz has long, slim fingers and his hands are rough and beautiful. Beautiful. I wonder if I could write a sonnet. Not a fancy one, but...

“Baz,” I say and clear my throat.

He looks up from his book and cocks an eyebrow at me.

“Get lost,” he says.

“I just – I -” I pull the paper from my pocket. He drops his book and his eyes widen. He must know what it is, even before I've shown him what it is.

“Where'd you get that?” he demands, but his voice is shaking. He sits up and walks towards me. Not confidently, like usually. His gaze flickers around. His hand reaches out, but he doesn't grab it. (Juliet's hand reaches out...) “I just – I found it -”

“Crowley, Snow, you ever hear of privacy?” Usually, he would snarl at me. Usually, he would just grab the paper from me. I've never seen him lose composure like this.

“Who is it?” I say. My voice is shaking, too. Suddenly, his face snaps shut and his hand shoots forward. I let him take it. It's his. (I know it half by heart.)

“None of your business. None of this is.” “Who is it about?” “Nobody.” He stalks back to his bed, conversation over. Not for me.

“Tell me.” “No.” “Please.”

He stops talking and picks up his book. I know he's trying to ignore me, but I'm not going to let up. I can't. “Why do you even care?” He's not giving me an inch.

The arch of his brow is perfectly formed.

Romeo kills Juliet's cousin. Doesn't that make him a villain, of sorts? It was self-defense, in a way, but still. Shouldn't she hate him? But she loves him anyway... She's such a fool.

“I think you should tell them.” “Have you read the poem at all?” “It's not...” I say. Swallow. “I think you're wrong.” “I'm never wrong.” “Agatha and I aren't together anymore, if you're worried about that.” He's staring at me. His mouth is hanging open. It's Agatha. It has to be.

“Simon...”

“It's Agatha, isn't it?” I feel like crying. His jaw snaps shut.

“Merlin, no,” he says. Is he denying it? No. I think he's serious. (He's giving me an inch.)

“I just... I just think you have a chance.” Agatha doesn't have blue eyes, or bronze curls. I don't know why I didn't think of it earlier. Who has blue eyes and bronze curls? “I don't,” he says. “Did you tell them?” “Ha.”

“Then how do you know?” “I just do. Leave me alone.” He turns away. I won't let him.

“I just want to help. Let me help.”

“Snow.” He sounds so exhausted. Of course he is. He's yearning for someone.

“You don't understand anything.” I want him to call me Simon again. I want to go over to his bed and – do – something. I sit on my own bed and growl at him.

“Maybe I could ask them,” I say. “What they think about you.”

“Merlin, Snow, you want to be my wingman?” “I guess.” “You're ridiculous.” “I'm right.”

Call me Simon.

“We're not even friends.” Right. But not even my worst enemy should be so – so desperately in love. It must hurt so much. (It hurts so much.)

“We could be.” “Don't be insane.” I wonder why he's not picking a fight with me. He's dismissive, but not vicious. I think I've made him vulnerable.

“I'm not going to fight you,” I say then. I'm not going to cry again. I won't. I draw my knees to my chest.

“Of course you're going to fight me,” Baz says. His voice is almost soft.

“You're not going to run out of time,” I whisper. “Is that why it's a tragedy? Because you think you're going to die? You won't. I won't let you.” “Simon,” he says.

Stop calling me Simon. I'm going to cry.

“Are you having me on? Do you really not know who it is?” “No.”

“Are you trying to spare me...” “What?” “Nevermind. Not even Bunce could figure it out?” “I didn't show her.” “Then stop thinking about it.”

“I cant,” I say. Baz' whole face is tense.

“Just pretend this never happened. Treat me the same as before. It doesn't matter. It doesn't change anything.”

It does, though.

“It's not just your poem,” I say. “I just... I don't want us to be Romeo and Juliet.”

“Do you even hear yourself?” “You know what I mean. I don't – I don't want to hurt you.”

“These violent delights...”

I flinch. These violent delights have violent ends is a forbidden spell. When someone is fighting, it kills or heavily wounds both parties. Baz curls in on himself on his bed, but he keeps his gaze fixed on me. “I don't want to fight you. Are you going to fight me?” I ask.

He pauses and keeps looking at me.

“You really haven't figured it out, have you? Crowley, you're such a moron.” A moron? My breath hitches. No. What am I thinking? What the hell am I thinking?

“Who is it?” I say again. “Who's your downfall? Your rhyme? The bloody sun?” He closes his eyes, lips drawn together.

“Stop mocking me,” he rasps out.

“I'm not. Please. I just want to know.”

He opens his eyes a crack and sighs and I know that he's giving in. I'm holding my breath.

“It's you, you fucking numpty.”

I freeze. Everything freezes. I must have misheard. I must have a brain disease. It's impossible. (But I have blue eyes. And I guess my hair could be described as bronze. And if anyone's going to end Baz, it's me. Nobody's going to end Baz.)

“The snow that burns me...” he whispers. “It's your fucking name.”

Baz is not in love with someone else. Thank fuck. Thank Merlin. Thank Aleister fucking Crowley. I can't do anything but stare at him. Baz shakes his head.

“I never should have written that stupid sonnet. But... I couldn't help myself. It was Romeo and Juliet.”

I'm his Shakespearen tragedy. Nicks and slicks.

I sit up and am over on his bed in an instant. He looks alarmed.

“Snow – don't,” he says quietly. He's laid his heart in my palm. He's written a sonnet about me.

“Lets do this, then,” I whisper. I want to lean in and kiss him.

“Do what? What are you talking about?”

He looks like he wants to scoot away from me, but he doesn't move. I want to grab him by the shoulders and never let go.

“Today in class, all I could think about was you,” I say.

I want to let go of his shoulders to bury my hands in his hair.

“About how much you want to kill me?” he says, a self-deprecating tone in his voice.

“No. About how I don't want to kill you. Mostly about your hair.” “What about my hair?” He touches it self-consciously. I want to take every bad thought out of his brain and throw them to the merwolves.

“About how I want to touch your hair.” I lean closer.

“About how you're more beautiful than Romeo.” I carefully raise my hand. He doesn't move away. His hair is so soft.

“About how Juliet is a fool for being in love with a villain.” His eyes are so beautiful. He lets me take his hand.

“But he's not a villain,” I whisper. “Not really.” “Snow,” he says stiffly. “You do know – that Romeo and Juliet is a cautionary tale.”

“If it's really – if you're really – then I don't care. Is it really about me?” I lean in even closer until my nose nearly touches his. Does he want this? Do I want this? I do. So much. For how long have I wanted this?

“Yes,” he chokes out. “Of course it's you. Who else would it be?” “How? How can you -”

I want him to lean forward. I'm so short of grabbing him by his shirt. And then he gives me another one of these sighs, and I know that I have him. Just give me the word. Just give me the word, and you can have it all.

“How do I love thee?” he says and his hand comes up. My nose brushes against his. “Let me count the ways.” He runs his fingers through my hair. It's so good.

“I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach,” he says.

He's reciting poetry at me. Merlin.

“And this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart,” he mutters. “I carry your heart. I carry it in my heart.” His lips are cool against mine. I press into him. I want him to have it all. I want to put my heart on a platter and let him take it.

“I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair,” he says. It's like he's singing. “I want to eat the sunbeam flaring in your lovely body. I want to eat your skin like a whole almond.” Is that a vampire thing? I don't care, he can have it all. “Our love it was stronger by far than the love of those who were older than we, of many far wiser than we,” he says. He's singing into my mouth. “And neither the angels in heaven above nor the demons down under the sea,” his breath goes heavy, “can ever dissever my soul from the soul of the beautiful Simon Snow.”

His voice is enchanting. I grab him and pull. I want to tie our hearts together. Chamber by chamber.

“What's in a name?” he says. “That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”

It's Romeo and Juliet.

“With love's light wings did I o'erperch these walls, for stony limits cannot hold love out, and what love can do, that dares love attempt: Therefore thy kinsmen are no stop to me.”

“Do you mean that?” “Yes. I mean it all. The Mage, his men, my family, no one can stop me. No spell can stop me. No sword.”

“You need to stop,” I say, but I'm smiling. “You're going to make me cry.”

That only spurs him on, of course. Baz has always loved making me cry.

“My bounty is as boundless as the sea, my love as deep; the more I give to thee, the more I have, for both are infinite.”

I'm addicted to his lips, and to the smell of cedar and bergamot.

“Dost thou love me?” he says then and pulls back a little to look at me. There's a question in his eyes. And I don't know any poetry by heart. (But I want to give him everything.) I make a noise in the back of my throat and try to think of something stupidly romantic to say. He's reciting love poetry at me. He wrote me a sonnet. He's given me every love confession there is. How am I supposed to top that?

Baz' lips turn down at the corners.

“Sorry,” he says, squeezing my hand. “I got carried away. You don't need to answer.”

He goes in for another kiss, but I put my hands to his chest and push him away.

“Sorry,” he says again. “It's just part of the play. I forgot myself.” He swallows and looks down. If I took every single dark thought of his, the merwolves could have a feast. I grab his face and he looks back up at me. His heart is in my hands. He's so eloquent, he knows a thousand ways to say that he loves me. He loves me. He loves me. I can't believe I've never thought of this before. (Maybe I have.) It's the best idea ever.

I only have one word.

“Yes.” “What?

“Yes, I dost love thou.” He smiles.

“That is so not how it works,” he says.

“Then how?” “I can't remember,” he says and giggles. Aleister Crowley. He's my Romeo.

“Do we have to be a tragedy?” I say and pull him in again. “You think?” “No,” he says and laughs. It's the most beautiful sound. “We can be anything you want us to be. I could cast a sonnet right now.”

“You wrote one. You wrote me a sonnet. That's embarrassing.”

I laugh, too.

“Shut up,” he says. I'd cross every line for him. And I embrace him and his hair tickles my neck and I tell him to talk poetry to me and deep into the night he whispers sweet everythings into my ear. I'm a fool for him. I'll take him to the school dance. I'll put him in a costume. I'll keep him safe and sound. I'll hold his hand. I'll run my fingers through his hair.

I refuse to believe we're star-crossed lovers.

This time, I believe, the stars are aligning just right.

#are people still reading fanfiction on tumblr?#carry on fanfiction #snowbaz fanfiction #carry on #snowbaz

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shimmershae · 4 years

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Personally? I'm all for Carol and Daryl experiencing a little emotional catharsis. My girl has been fucked over six ways to Sunday since Rick abandoned her on the side of that road. Since before that really. Being married to Ed Peletier, enduring his physical and mental abuse and being on constant alert that he might try something untoward and evil with their own daughter had to be a living nightmare. Finally being released from that prison only to lose Sophia so tragically and feel the guilt over not doing more to find her? Oh my heart. My girl has suffered in so many ways and for so long. She's barely had a moment to settle into some kind of peace and be her true self, the person she always wanted and thought she could be, without having to regroup after some tragedy and don another mask. What we're seeing this season, whether it's ever explicitly spelled out or not, is a cumulative effect of every bit of that.

So yeah.

Bring on the angst.

Lance those wounds so the ugly infection can start to be cleansed.

Do I deny that she's acting recklessly? That I'm just as frustrated as Daryl that she is almost impossible to reach right now for more than a few, brief moments of clarity and peace?

Absolutely not.

I'm not that kind of fan.

But I am a fan with a long memory and I remember Michonne chaining reminders of her own executed vengeance and always present loss to her person and having them follow in her wake. I'm also a fan that recollects Rick ripping out the throat of the nasty bastard that would have raped his son.

Some might argue that those acts didn't endanger anybody good, anybody not considered family, and I'll give them that. But see? Those instances, at those points, were relatively isolated in comparison. They didn't manifest as a result of soul-breaking after soul-breaking loss mounting one right over the top of the other.

Ed Peletier physically, emotionally, and probably sexually abused his wife for years. He looked at his own little girl with evil in his thoughts and his heart. Walkers got to him and Carol got to take a pickaxe to the human representation of the traumas of her past. But did she get a moment to actually breathe and exist peacefully before life hit her cruelly again?

Barely. Because Sophia was lost, bitten and turned, and she had to endure the trauma of not only that but Rick putting a bullet through her little girl's head.

Dale was eviscerated.

Andrea put herself between Carol and some walkers with the downfall of the Farm, too. Survivor's guilt is real, ya'll.

Then they found the Prison and things were looking up. They really were.

Hershel was bitten and from that moment, everything snowballed. Because Rick had to amputate his leg and Carol found herself promoted to Lori's main source of medical help. She did what she could to prepare, but it was all for naught because that little punk Andrew got his revenge and ultimately two of Carol's closest friends perished. And again, she got to carry that guilt. Because T-Dog sacrificed himself to save her. She wasn't there to help with Judith's birth. Can you imagine how she felt? I can and it was at this point, that a pattern started to really emerge, IMHO.

They got Andrea back, only to ultimately lose her again. Merle was also killed by the Governor.

Fast forward some and things were starting to settle again. Real happiness and peace seemed to be within reach and the sickness started. Not wanting to lose anymore of her family, Carol made the hard choice to do something to try to stop it from spreading and put down a too far gone David and Karen. She carried the secret for a while, had to put down her friend Ryan and become the reluctant adoptive mother of Lizzie and Mika, and then Rick figured things out. He took her on a mission, passed his unilateral judgment, and left her on the side of the road like trash.

Now, Carol has never been shown to be unfeeling. Never. She didn't react with histrionics but she was hurt deeply with Rick's way of handling the situation. Still. That didn't stop her from going back at the first hint of trouble for her family and what did she find?

She found the whole place in ruins and thought her entire family was dead until she happened upon Tyreese and the girls.

I don't have to go through the painful details of Lizzie and Mika. Anybody that has ever loved the character of Carol Peletier and/or afforded her an inkling of unbiased understanding knows how much the Grove gutted her.

Then there was Terminus and getting her family back again, only to feel like an outsider. Finding Beth and witnessing her pay for her childish impulsiveness in such a cruel way. Trying to bring Daryl back from the brink of losing a child himself when Lizzie and Mika and what happened still haunted her. When the only other person that was haunted by Lizzie and Mika died so tragically so soon, how do you think she felt? Hmm?

They get to Alexandria and she took to hiding herself and her emotions behind masks and distance.

She met Sam and echoes of her own abusive past rise up to confront her. Sam ultimately met a grisly end. Morgan arrived and honed in on her like some kind of morality police, constantly picking at the scabs of the wounds that just wouldn't heal.

By the time Denise was murdered and the kill floor happened, Carol was thisclose to breaking. To just giving in. And guess who swooped in again?

I won't keep going on in detail because this has already turned into a novella.

But Carol has suffered inordinately under these writers' pens.

Aside from the people I've already mentioned (more than enough to drive any sane person to break), she also lost Glenn and Abraham, Sasha, Noah, Carl, Benjamin, Enid and Tara and finally Henry.

Henry.

Tell me. If it had been Judith on one of those pikes, would there be any acceptable limit to the vengeance doled out by the likes of Michonne and Daryl, possibly even Carol herself?

I don't think so.

In fact, I think any or all three of the characters would have been praised for the lengths they would go. Particularly Michonne.

But Carol's efforts are too much?

Paint everybody with the same brush or admit to your own bias. Stop persecuting a particular character and her fans because you just don't prefer her. Everybody's welcome to have their own favorites. I'm certainly not here o police anybody on that. The objections roll in when the demonization starts because from where I stand, as a fan of both the remaining originals and Michonne? It's just not warranted.

Anyway, let me climb back out of that long and winding rabbit hole to reiterate my original point, lol.

Bring on the angst and the arguments if need be. It's past time for all the feelings, and I do mean all the feelings to be voiced.

That is all.

Goodnight.

#ignore this if you want #I'm feverish #hahaha #I'm not even going to tag it any further #for reasons

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buffyversefanfiction · 4 years

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Twisted Tristan

Chapter 3 - Our City (Volume 3)

Warnings: I do not own or claim to own the original content to “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”, “Angel”, the comics or any of the original characters from the “Buffyverse” all rights belong to Joss Whedon.

15 plus, displays of Violence, Gore, Torture, M/M, F/M, F/F.

Drusilla and Darla found themselves walking down a dark alleyway in Los Angeles laughing sinisterly amongst themselves when they suddenly came across a baby boy wrapped in a jacket, Willow’s jacket to be precious and the baby in question was none other than a much younger Tristan, Buffy’s biological son.

“And here was me thinking about having a little something to eat.” Darla said to Drusilla while ascending her vampire face.

“No mummy this child is far too precious to be wasted as a snack.” Drusilla told her off before lifting the quiet baby child before showing the boy her vamp face which amused him as he smiled at her much to Drusilla’s delight.

“Drusilla the last thing we need right now is for you start getting sentimental about killing babies.” Darla snapped at Drusilla who began rocking the baby back and forth.

“I see a great darkness set to descend within this child a bitterness that will only ripen with age and an incredible amount of chaos he’ll inflict on this world.” Drusilla replied joyfully while dancing with the baby boy in her arms.

“Drusilla, I don’t have time for these games ever since Angelus set us alight last week you’ve been acting even more like you than normal.” Darla moaned as her face returned to its normal state.

“Mummy don’t be mad this baby will be the answers to all your prayers one day,” Drusilla revealed to her while continuing to keep her eyes on the baby with pure adoration. “This little child will be the cause of Buffy’s downfall once and for all finally the preppy little cheerleader will get what’s coming to her.”

“You get all that from holding a child?” Darla asked her. “How can you be so sure?”

“I see a future where this child is fully grown a future where he will inflict immense pain onto others especially little miss Buffy, and I will have great joy in seeing it unfold.” Drusilla promised her vampire grandmother/granddaughter.

“Hm, I still say we eat the little rat just in case what your saying is just another of your episodes.” Darla replied. “Besides I’m really hungry.”

“Buffy sunk her pretty little manicured nails into my father Angelus taking him away from you and then she came for my darling Spike,” Drusilla moaned as her face returned to normal while she continued to cuddle into the child. “It’s no fair that she still lives but if we spare this baby she won’t be living for much longer.”

“So, you’re seriously telling me that if we spare this little rodent than we ourselves will be having a hand in that perky bitch’s demise?” Darla asked her interest in the child being more than just a snack rising. “Well I’m not bloody raising the thing vampires were not made to be mothers and quite frankly I can’t think of a ghastlier task.”

“All we have to do mummy is deliver him to the right destination and then just wait as he grows to be the man who destroys Buffy’s entire world.” Drusilla made herself clear.

Tristan and Dante stood behind the counter of their somewhat restored demonic dive bar with new demonic, monstrous and vampiric clientele filling their pub as the two lovers made out passionately while groping each other as a vampire bartender walked around the bar handing out drinks and weapons to the customers making it clear these two were getting ready for a big battle in their own way.

Dante feared this fight would be his and his lover’s last, but he couldn’t stop himself from trying to get the love of his life what he wanted. They often say that without a soul a vampire can’t love but that’s never been true.

A soulless Drusilla and a soulless Spike were in love for centuries until a still soulless at the time Spike fell in love with Buffy, a soulless Darla was besotted with Angelus for centuries even somewhat loving Angel in her own way and a soulless loved Dante with every inch of his un-beating a heart and if that meant dying to give him what he wanted then he was ready for it.

Tristan was a truly twisted violent man who cared for very few but Dante was his other half, Dante not only understood the darkness residing within him but he loved it and because of that Tristan truly loved him but there was something Tristan loved even more than his vampire boyfriend and that was the fight.

Faith pulled out a rucksack from underneath her bed opening it to reveal a bag full of weapons while she stood in her motel room with Angel and Illyria as Faith pulled out her infamous knife from season three of Buffy looking the blade up and down with a sense of nostalgia and euphoria that you’d easily be fooled into believing that blade was first Faith’s first love.

“Do you need some time alone?” Angel asked her before the three of them were shocked by the glass on the window of the motel room exploded into pieces onto the ground as the curtains fell to the ground forcing Illyria to rush over to Angel and push him into a corner of the room which was shadowed from the glaring sunlight now coming into the room.

“Your more than welcome.” Illyria said to Angel while Faith walked over to the shattered window to see a vampire standing outside her room in thick black robes protecting him from bursting into flames because of the sunlight.

“My masters have told me to inform you of their disappointment for you Faith Lehane they expected far better things from you and yet you align yourself with the treacherous vampire and a former goddess.” The vampire informed her instantly igniting Illyria’s fury.

“There’s nothing former about me you blood sucker,” Illyria snapped at the vampire. “I have no trouble in showing you that.”

“My masters want you to return to the place where all this started tonight.” The vampire continued to tell Faith while ignoring an infuriated Illyria before he began to remove his robes and by doing so his body caught on fire the flames quickly beginning to burn his body. “Dante will drink from the bloody of the redeemed rogue slayer while Tristan will burn this city to the ground.”

Faith, Illyria and Angel watched as the vampire’s body which was on fire quickly turned to nothing but dust.

“I guess the dramatic flare clearly runs in the family,” Angel scoffed. “My evil self-taught Dante more tricks then I realized.”

“Ugh, why do vampires go out of their way to be more dramatic than humans,” Illyria moaned while rolling her eyes. “This world was so much easier to enjoy when humankind was enslaved, and blood suckers were kept as pets.”

Dante and Tristan sat alone in their bedroom on the edge of their bed above their demonic dive bar the curtains were closed due to the fading daylight which would set Dante on fire but what you could see of the window you could tell the sun was setting and the battle was drawing nearer.

“I know our plan is to wipe all slayers and obviously Faith’s one of those said slayers, but I can’t help this feeling inside that is yelling at me that this isn’t going to end well for either of us.” Dante admitted his fears to Tristan. “If we run now Drusilla herself wouldn’t even blame us, they have a freaking goddess on their side.”

“Dante my darling we have fought for years to get to where we are now, we can’t just give up and let these people take it from us.” Tristan replied as he stood up from the bed. “After everything I’ve been through everything, we’ve been through I refuse to just run from the storm I am going to embrace it with or without you by my side.”

“I will ride out any storm with you my love you know I’ll never leave your side.” Dante said as he stood up from the bed to face his lover trying to reassure him of his loyalty. “I want nothing more than for you to get the revenge that you deserve but not if it means you killing yourself in the process.”

“You know I love you Dante I’ve loved you from the first moment met.” Tristan admitted to the undead love of his life. “You found me when I was lost in darkness with no-one by my side and you taught me how to master that darkness but as much as I love you, I can’t walk away from this. This is everything I’ve lived for everything I stayed alive for and I won’t stop fighting until my last breath is taken from me.”

“I will stand by your side even if it means it will lead to our deaths and then I will stand by your side in the flames of hell.” Dante promised him before kissing his love one last time before they got ready for the fight of their lives.

Faith, Angel and Illyria were stood in the alleyway outside of Tristan and Dante’s demonic dive bar ready to deal with their New York problem right there and then.

“You guys can take whoever you want but I want Tristan.” Faith told them as they noticed large groups of vampires, demons and creatures appearing from out of the bar, out of the shadows and around the corners.

“I am very displeased with these opponents they have chosen for this fight it’s going to be far too easy to the point where this battle could bore me.” Illyria informed her teammates as Dante and Tristan walked out of their demonic dive bar ready to fight. “So, to accept your request Faith I can only agree to leaving them till last and if you’re not done by then I’ll simply finish them all.”

“Okay ladies let’s stop discussing our kills and actually get to the killing.” Angel told them before the trio charged towards the army of evil that was determined to kill them all.

Illyria wasted no time in taking down vampire after vampire by ripping their heads of before going for the demons and ripping their hearts out with such ease as Angel launched himself towards his foes that proved a little harder for him but in fairness Illyria was an all powerful goddess so in any other fight Angel’s strength would be considered rather impressive and still was holding his own with the goddess herself.

Meanwhile Faith wasted no time in charging towards Tristan beginning a fight between the two of them that they both had been waiting for since their first meeting. Tristan managed to hold his own against the reformed slayer for quite some time, but it was clear she was gaining the upper hand before beating him to the ground leaving the twisted man with little fight left.

Dante noticed from afar that his loved one was in fatal danger at Faith’s hands and charged towards the slayer only to be stopped in his tracks by Illyria who grabbed the vampire by his head at the same time Tristan had sucker kicked Faith to the ground and jump back on his feet just in time to see Illyria ripped Dante’s head from his shoulders turning Tristan’s vampire lover to dust.

“No!” Tristan screamed completely devastated by what he just saw causing the war in front of him to instantly stop as he ran over to the remains of his loved one and fell to his knees holding the ashes of Dante in his hands while he began to sob uncontrollably. “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this you were never supposed to leave me.”

Angel continued to finish off the remaining of Tristan and Dante’s evil army while both Illyria and Faith stood still while watching Tristan continue to sob into the ashes of his fallen lost one and in that moment Faith realized this man no matter how twisted was in fact just a man a heartbroken man to be exact.

Following their battle against Tristan his vampire lover Dante and their army of minions Faith, Angel and Illyria were victorious Dante was dead and Tristan was defeated but Faith couldn’t help but feel sorry for the young raven-haired man.

She found herself reluctantly forming a strange bond with him from the start and she knew how much Tristan loved Dante which made her feel guilty for being part of taking him away from Tristan.

Things were far simpler for Faith Lehane when she just killed without caring and never had to answer to anyone but at the same time she had something now that she never had before friends which helped her come back from the darkness the same darkness she was determined to pull Tristan out of knowing he was human and believing like her he could be redeemed.

Faith, Illyria and Angel kept Tristan hostage in Faith’s motel room until Rupert Giles arrived at the motel with several female slayers who took Tristan from Faith’s room and into the back of the truck before chaining him up and sitting down with him before closing the doors as Faith, Illyria, Angel and Giles stood in the motel parking lot next to the truck in which had just become a high security prison for Tristan.

“I’ve got to admit when I saw a truck I got immediate flashbacks to the watchers council G but I suppose having slayers on side to handle slayers it’s a bit of a step forward even if you are still following some of the council’s rules I’m glad your making it your own because quite frankly most of that council were asses with too much power.” Faith admitted to Giles. “If anyone can handle us girls the right way it’s going to be you.”

“Thanks Faith it really means a lot that you of all people agree with what I’m doing because no slayer should or will ever be treated the same way you and Buffy were treated by the council.” Giles promised not yet noticing the irony of those words.

“So, what exactly happens with Tristan now?” Angel asked, clearly nowhere near as trustful of Giles as Faith was. “I mean how do you redeem someone slayer style when they’re not even a slayer?”

“Well I like to believe that anyone can be redeemed as long as their willing to seek out redemption and if not when then precautions are in place a prison of sorts you could say for unreformed slayers.” Giles admitted quickly losing Faith’s trust in the process with Faith not exactly being too much of a fan of prison following her stint in the place.

“This mere mortal is not a slayer why are we treating him like one?” Illyria asked Angel, Faith and Giles. “If you ask me you should’ve let me eliminate him straight after I eliminated his lover.”

“I’m well aware that Tristan is not a slayer yet somehow he requires many of the training and slayer like strength strong enough to take down several slayers in fact.” Giles reported to Illyria. “His origins will probably reveal how he is the way he is, but he is still human, and every human has a soul which means he has a chance of being redeemed.”

“Redemption is a lot harder than it sounds,” Faith admitted before going on to say. “I’ll need to check out this rehabilitation center of yours sometime G and not as a patient before anyone gets any ideas.”

“You’re more than welcome anytime.” Giles told her with a sincere smile on his face.

Angel and Faith remained standing in the motel parking lot long after Giles drove off with his slayer bodyguards and the twisted Tristan and long after Illyria made her own way out of New York City in search of her next battle.

“This was some seriously good nostalgia for the good old days when you and I were a team.” Angel admitted to Faith.

“You, Illyria and I do make quite the trio I’ve got to admit but what’s the latest on Fred is she still in there because I couldn’t help but notice she never made an appearance the whole time Illyria was here.” Faith wondered, worrying about her Fred’s fate.

“Don’t worry Fred’s still in there they’ve kind of come to terms with the whole-body sharing dilemma and it seems to be working out quite well for them both.” Angel explained to Faith about Fred and Illyria sharing the same body.

“Yeah I’m sorry but that whole situation is never not going to be weird.” Faith admitted with an awkward laugh. “I do miss you too big guy.”

“I’m not going to pretend I don’t know what your about to go and do Faith.” Angel told her with a sincere smile. “You’re going to check out this rehabilitation thing Giles has going and check up on your little frenemy Tristan.”

“Here the kid clearly has some issues but if he can be the upset for Dante’s death, he must’ve loved him which means he feels something other than just his murderous tendencies.” Faith said in defense of the slayer killing man.

“It’s not often you like anyone this little psychopath must be pretty special to break Faith Lehane’s armor.” Angel teased her before sincerely admitting. “With you on his side I’m sure his soul will be saved in no time.”

“Don’t be calling me a hero or nothing I’m not exactly the saving type.” Faith replied, attempting to brush off Angel’s compliments towards her.

“You saved me from myself when everyone turned against me for my actions as Twilight.” Angel admitted to the redeemed slayer. “Not to mention the time when you literally almost killed yourself in order to take down Angelus without killing me.”

“Yeah well you saved me first I was just returning the favour.” Faith scoffed before Angel kissed her much to her surprise.

Faith looked at Angel for a moment as she looked at him the two realizing in that moment the feelings that had grown between them over the years all leading to this very moment as they gave into their emotions and began passionately kissing within the motel parking lot.

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travllingbunny · 5 years

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The 100: 6x09 What You Take With You

How amazing was this episode? It is, so far, one of the two best episodes of the season (alongside 6x07) and probably in my top 10 favorite The 100 episodes of all time.

It benefited from its focus on just three storylines and a limited number of characters, which allowed it to properly focus on the characters and their psychological and emotional journeys.

The title seems to be a reference to the Dagobah cave scene in The Empire Strikes Back, or rather, the dialogue right before it:

Luke: There is something not right here. I feel cold, death.

Yoda: That place… is strong with the dark side of the Force. A domain of evil it is. In you must go.

Luke: What’s in there?

Yoda: Only what you take with you.

Luke ends up having a hallucination of fighting Darth Vader in the cave and killing him, only to take off his helmet and see his own face, in possibly the most famous movie scene of a character confronting their “Shadow” self.

So, when the episode titles for season 6 of The 100 were released, it wasn’t hard to guess that this episode would contain scenes of a character “facing their demons” in a fantasy sequence (and which character it would be, especially as we had seen glimpses of Octavia fighting the Blodreina version of herself in the trailer). As a fan of psychological character exploration through trippy fantasy sequences, I had high expectations from this episode regarding Octavia’s story – and they were completely fulfilled and maybe exceeded. I wasn’t expecting to see Charles Pike in Octavia’s hallucination soul-searching, and his appearance and how he was used was brilliant.

The other two, equally important storylines, were:

the continuation of the saga about the Bellamy/Clarke relationship through the story about the fight between Josephine and Clarke for control of Clarke’s body, and Bellamy’s attempts to save Clarke from real and certain death;

and the conclusion of the opposite storyline - about Abby crossing a lot of ethical lines to work with the Primes and use bodysnatching to resurrect Kane in another body. This was the final death of Marcus Kane, a tragic end of Kabby romance, but it also a fitting ending for Kane, with him asserting his own integrity and morality by choosing to die and refuse to be complicit in the practices of the Primes, but to instead start a fight against them. It will also probably be the turning point in Abby’s character arc. The resolution of this storyline has caused a lot of controversy and anger, which I don’t understand, since Kane’s decision was obvious and in-character, so much that I predicted it last week, because it was the only thing that made sense narratively and for Kane’s characterization.

More thoughts under the cut.

Octavia vs Blodreina

The fact we still don’t know what happened to Diyoza or to Octavia in the Anomaly makes me think that this is a plot that will carry over to season 7, after the bodysnatching business is wrapped up. And the more they postpone the resolution, the more hopeful I am for Diyoza to survive season 6.

Choosing the angry, violent red box instead of the calm green box is such an Octavia thing to do. But maybe it was the right thing in this case, as it let her face her demons head on and figure things out for herself.

The red butterflies scene was one of the many callbacks to season 1.

Pike’s role made sense because Octavia’s descent into darkness was not just prompted by the trauma of Lincoln’s death at Pike’s hands, but also because it started when she decided to murder Pike for revenge, making herself judge, jury and executioner. That was the first time she committed actual murder, as opposed to killing people in fight. She probably thought at the time, as a big portion of the fandom did, that Pike was a bad guy and had it coming. But one could now say the same thing about Octavia herself, and she is obviously aware of it. If Pike deserved to die, doesn’t she, too? Using the same standards, shouldn’t she be murdered for revenge by someone like James (the Wonkru guy from 6x02, who lost his mother in the gorge and blames Octavia fori t)? In fact, Octavia tried to get him to kill her, because, on some level, she thought she deserved death, too, even while she was pretending that she didn’t feel any guilt and trying to justify all her actions. Why should Bellamy ever forgive her for throwing him into the fighting pit to die? I can see many similarities between Octavia and Pike: both of them are fighters by nature, both were driven by the desire to save and protect people, both were angry and traumatized by what had been done to their people, and both were also prone to black-and-white thinking and harsh judgment of their enemies. As Octavia’s mind version of Pike pointed out, we are products of what we have done, and what has been done to us. Pike is an embodiment of both for Octavia. And Pike himself was a product of what the Ice Nation under Queen Nia had done to him – killing almost all of the people he grew up with, many right in front of him (including 15 children), which made him go into the woods to fight for months. Pike started pre-emptively seeing Grounders as enemies even when they were not, and eventually, as a Chancellor, started acting as a dictator and hunting for traitors in his camp. Octavia started by proclaiming everyone (or almost everyone – Echo didn’t count) her people, One people, but that eventually turned into tyranny and seeing enemies in everyone who disagreed or refused to do everything she asked of them. Pike condemned Lincoln to death and execute him for the same reasons Octavia as Blodreina condemned Bellamy, Indra and Gaia to the fighting pit: to maintain authority and show that rebellion is not allowed and will be punished by death. We may not have seen this put into words, but Octavia’s vision of Blodreina in Pike’s role, condemning/executing Pike the way he had Lincoln, showed her realization about herself. „Pike“ even reminded Octavia that he was trying to earn his redemption by doing good when she killed him. Of course, since Pike was really an enbodiment of a part of Octavia’s own mind, it is really something she has been thinking about and that she’s telling herself. It’s a level of self-reflection that I never expected to see from Octavia of the earlier seasons, and shows how much she’s grown.

So does she deserve redemption? As „Pike“ pointed out, it is not about deserving. You just need to make the decision to go and do good, and not be Blodreina anymore, shown by her symbolic killing of „Blodreina“. She is still to actually start her redemption arc, but getting into the right frame of mind and realizing she wants to change and do better was the necessary first step.

Kane’s goodbye

I’ve already written quite a bit about Abby’s emotional and ethical downfall and the tragic development of the Kabby relationship in seasons 5-6 here and I predicted that the storyline would end with Kane’s death by his own choice (and that Henry Ian Cusick would return to play Kane in a vision for his last scene), even though I didn’t guess when or how it would happen.

Unlike some other fans, I find this to be a very fitting ending for Marcus Kane. I don’t think of what he did as suicide, but as a sacrifice, or, more than anything, a refusal to legitimize and benefit from an evil practice that involves brainwashing people so they could be lambs easily led to slaughter, and then murdering them as lesser and disposable, so you could prolong your own life. He couldn’t fight against it, speak against it, while being in a stolen body himself. (There is a reason why Gabriel is ashamed to admit to his followers that he lives in a host body.) Everything about it was wrong to him, and went against everything he believes in. (Meeting Gavin’s widow and realizing that the Primes are lying to their people also played a role. As Gabriel confirmed in this episode, and as Kane 2.0 and the other Primes, no doubt, are aware, there is no trace of the host mind after the transfer – unless the transfer fails.)

Indra has finally been woken up! But is she staying on the ship now, and if so, when do we see her again? I’m glad she got to say goodbye to her friend before his death. I like the fact that Indra pointed out that both the Arkers and the Grouders had some disturbing practices of their own, but Kane gave the logical answer (something I was hoping someone would point out at any point) – the fact we did bad things in the past, doesn’t mean we should let evil things happen. That’s not how morality (or common sense) works.

The show loves angst, so of course, Kane’s death had to be exactly like Jake Griffin’s death (which we saw in the flashbacks in 1x03), and Abby had to witness it. But, as Raven pointed out, it is better for her if she gets to say goodbye. (Raven would know, since she never got to say goodbye to Finn or Shaw. Or Sinclair.) Kabby has been one of my favorite ships on the show – because it is one of the very few romantic relationships that was well developed, way before Kane and Abby got together. Their chemistry was obvious since season 1. And while Greyston Holt did a great job playing Kane 2.0, it only made sense that Henry Ian Cusick return to play Kane in that last scene, when Kane appeared to Abby the way she saw him in her mind-eye - which also made him feel like real Kane to the audience. The scene was truly beautiful and sad, with Abby’s heartbreak, and Indra and Raven reciting the Ark prayer (with Indra adding the Grounder “Your fight is over”). I don’t think that Kane would really do the same to bring Abby back – or that Abby would have done it if she had been in a healthier state of mind, but I can see why he told Abby that. While he disagreed with her decision and couldn’t accept it, he showed understanding, empathy and love to her, while urging her to let him go and continue her life.

All in all, considering the tricky actor availability situation due to Cusick’s role on another show, I think that the writing staff have found a good way to give Kane a proper sendoff, and make it meaningful and highly relevant to this season’s themes and main plot.

In a way, it’s more Abby’s tragedy than Kane’s – he made the decision that was the only right one, one of the most in-character things he’s ever done, but Abby is still lost and needs to let go off Kane, really recover from addiction, and find her own sense of morality again.

The Kane/Abby storyline and relationship this season is juxtaposed to the Josephine/Gabriel story – and the Clarke/Bellamy story. We have seen bodysnatching as something people (Gabriel, Russell and Simone with Josephine, Abby with Kane) resort to in order to resurrect someone they love. But while Josephine couldn’t be happier about it – because she’s selfish and, let’s say, morally challenged, Kane, with his deep sense of morality, could never accept that. We’ve also seen a storyline about Bellamy doing everything to save Clarke – but while all of those are motivated by love, the big difference between what Bellamy is doing and what Abby has done (and what Gabriel initially did when he resurrected Josephine, at the expense of 40+ of the people he had raised from embryos) is that Bellamy is fighting against an evil act, to right a wrong, as opposed to doing evil or enabling evil.

Bellarkephine

Bellarke has always been the central relationship on the show, but it’s never been as front and center as it is this season. In 6x07, Clarke gave up on living at the moment when Josephine managed to convince her that Bellamy had given up on her and moved on and that he and everyone are better off without her, and the last few been about Bellamy being willing to do everything to get Clarke back. The show is being really obvious about Bellamy’s and Clarke’s feelings for other other, even more so than it was in the previous seasons (and I happen to think it was already quite obvious). It’s not the first time that other characters have called out those two on their feelings for each other (from Lexa noticing in season 2 that Clarke cares for Bellamy and worries about him more than about her other people, to ALIE!Raven in season 3, taunting Bellamy over being more devoted to Clarke than his girlfriend Gina, to Octavia calling out Bellamy in season 5 and calling Clarke another traitor who he loves), but now it is an integral part of the main story, the way it was not before.

I’ll say one thing, though – while it is undeniable, seeing his behavior over the previous few episodes. that Bellamy cares for Clarke more than anyone else at this point, as Josephine points out (and that statement implies that he cares for her more than his girlfriend, Echo), I think one should be fair and acknowledge that Clarke is in danger of certain and definite death, after a definite and short period of time, while the others back in Sanctum are only in danger of potential death, so I don’t think it would be fair if they begrudged Bellamy going off to save Clarke.

This dynamic was weird, because Bellamy was simultaneously not fond of (to put it mildly) of Josephine, but was incredibly tender and caring with her body, because it was Clarke’s body, and Clarke is still in there somewhere. The way he gently wiped JoClarke’s black blood and put his own, so the Children of Gabriel wouldn’t know she was a Nightblood, reminds me of Bellamy cutting himself to fool the Ark guards, so they wouldn’t know the blood belonged to Octavia, when she would accidentally cut herself.

Josephine said that love was the reason why Sanctum would be destroyed – implying not just that her father put everything in danger for his love for her (by putting her in Clarke’s body), but also that Bellamy’s love for Clarke and his determination to save would be the cause of Sanctum’s destruction. It’s the 3rd time that the word “love” has been used on the show to describe Bellamy’s and Clarke’s feelings for each other: the first time was in season 2 when Clarke said she was being weak when she tried to keep Bellamy from going to Mount Weather, because love is weakness; the second time was in season 5, when Octavia called out Bellamy on pleading for the life of a traitor who you love; and this is the third time.

The moment when Bellamy looked at Clarkephine when he knew Clarke could hear him, and paused before saying “I won’t let you die”, was one of those moments where Bellamy or Clarke seem to want to say more, or are saying a lot more, through or instead of a statement like “Hurry” or “Don’t feel bad about leaving me here”. Those two have always had their own way of saying ILY.

Bellamy replying “Tell me about it” when Josephine called the “weird” relationship between him and Clarke “exhausting” has to be one of the best meta moments on the show.

(BTW, I don’t think Bellamy actually wanted to kill Clarke in 1x02 – the first moment he could have let her die, he saved her. But maybe she thought so, or maybe Josephine saw her memories and drew that conclusion. Also, the show Josie is misusing the word “genocide” and should look up the definition.)

But after a while, what was Josephine trying to taunt Bellamy, turned into Josephine being moved by Bellamy’s love for Clarke – not because she’s a compassionate person (she’s not), but because it reminds her of Gabriel’s love she had and lost. We got her explicit confirmation that she has really been in love with him, since they got to the planet (which may have been the first time they met). And while we know, from his reactions in 6x08, that he is still in love with her (but she may not know that), he has still been trying to kill her for the last 70 years – because she is a villain and is largely responsible for maintaining a terrible system of oppression and murder. This is the main difference between Gabriel/Josephine and Bellarke: Clarke is actually not a villain, she is a hero. Josephine is the villain that some of the characters and a part of the fandom imagines Clarke to be, because they are not paying attention to the actual story.

I love the fact that Clarke used the Morse code, for the second time, but now to both mock Josephine with “Boohoo” and try to make Bellamy laugh, while confirming that she was able to hear them both.

It’s really amazing just how Bellarke-heavy this episode was, even though Clarke and Bellamy weren’t able to directly interact most of the time – and haven’t been since 6x04. The one moment when they did get a chance to interact, for some 10 seconds, was when Clarke temporarily took control over her body because Josephine realized she sucked at defending herself and had to let Clarke do it. And it was amazing – the way Eliza changed her expression, voice and demeanor and the way she looked at Bellamy, the way Bellamy immediately knew she was Clarke, the chemistry that was suddenly there again in full force when it was Bellamy and Clarke interacting, rather than Bellamy and Josephine. Clarke is determined to never leave Bellamy again (as we saw in 5x13, when she was not willing to leave him behind even while they were seconds away from missiles hitting), but this time, he was right that literally staying there would have killed her, so she did the smart thing and sneaked him the keys – allowing him to save himself, while he let her go to save herself.

My judgement of the Children of Gabriel after 6x03 still stands: morally ambiguous group, the right goal, but too murder-happy.

Josephine may be a 200+ old narcissistic, evil Prime that I want to die, but her interactions with Clarke are really fun. It was great to see Clarke get the upper hand, at least for a while, and be in control again. And I loved the fact that Clarke rubbed it into Josephine’s face that she had stolen some skills from her – and calling her out on the irony of Josephine complaining about it, while living in Clarke’s stolen body.

I can’t wait to see Josephine and Gabriel reunited, and Octavia and Clarke and Bellamy reunited – but I’m also looking forward to more of the Clarke/Josephine fight for control in the mindspace.

Rating: 10/10

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sparda3g · 5 years

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Kimetsu no Yaiba Chapter 160 Review

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You know what’s great about this series? Well, we can name many, but one that I really enjoy is the backstory. Whether it is kind, heartwarming, or depressing, it’s very well-told that deeply define the characters today. Inosuke’s backstory is one of them. This chapter not only delivered a great but brutal backstory, but enraged and encouraged the fans to support Inosuke to brutalize Doma, the sole demon who deserve it immensely.

I trust Gotouge to deliver a solid backstory; however, I am still amazed by the execution. Before this chapter, I thought it would have been very simple. Doma met Inosuke’s biological mother and simply ate her like any other demon. I would have been fine with that, depending on how it was told and give enough anger for Inosuke to lose his cool. That was not the ideal, rather go into great insight of the story that eventually lead to the cruel fate. It not only told a story, but exploit the distasteful of Doma and the agony of Inosuke.

When you look at the chapter’s cover, you know this one is going to be pretty sad. While that is true, it’s how it builds up to the end fate that makes it all the more tragic. Inosuke is in denial, but Doma is toying with his emotion. It’s always sad to see Shinobu for any reason, but this one hurts more because Inosuke wanted to ask her if they have met before. Sadly, we know that’s no longer possible. Good for Kanao for trying to cool him down, which is telling when she was incredibly pissed before.

Doma is twisted as usual, but his action continue to faze me. For instance, if he wants to remember something, he literally dig to his brain with his finger. That’s just freaky; Inosuke said it best. Now, this is where it gets dark and disturbing. For many fans, there are content that could make them feel uneasy, and this series doesn’t hold back. It could have gone Seinen level, but thankfully, the visual wasn’t shown completely. With all that said, the narration still gives a bone-chilling feeling.

Inosuke’s mother was only about 17 or 18 years of age when she was carrying him as a baby. I don’t know much of history if that’s considered too young for a mother. However, I don’t need history to know that abusing is never okay, and sadly, she was the victim. Her husband beat her up and her mother-in-law bullied her every day. That’s absolute hell. The disturbing part isn’t just on the visual, but on the narration as well. The description of her abuse is hard to imagine or more like I don’t want to; no one innocent should be in that position.

The backstory takes a break, but the way how it transition is cruel. Her face was recovered because of Doma’s aide, but that memory confirms that Inosuke is in fact related. To think, you have to recall the abuse of one person to remember someone else and announce it proudly. That’s damn cold, Doma. Fate brought them together. Call it a miracle if you want, but this is torture.

The action is short, but impactful. I cringed when Inosuke took an X-slash. Thank God for Kanao to save him in time, especially for her speed. It was short, but that had me riled up. The backstory resume but the tone slowly becomes notably different. Earlier, Doma narrated in a more sympathetic tone. Of course, this is him we are dealing with, so naturally, he has no remorse whatsoever.

One of the most heartbreaking part is the pinky promise. It turns out that Inosuke’s mother was the one who started the pinky promise, which is why he felt a familiar feeling earlier. She sang him a song many times with different wordings. Above all, he remembers the song that deeply touched his heart about her protecting him, even if it costs her life. That is soul crushing. To figure out where that pinky promise came from, this was a cruel way. It’s saddening that her hope was renewed when she was saved by Doma, so you know the downfall was inevitable.

Once she found out Doma’s true intention, she lost all faith and ran off to escape, but it was impossible. It’s quite depressing when you review her standpoint. She was in hell with her family, thought to escape, only to land on another hell. It was absolute tragic for her. The one part that wasn’t, was her baby, but she had to save him by any means necessary. That’s when the scene from over 100 chapters ago appears; that is painful. It’s even more painful with Inosuke finally accepting that he had a mother, and Doma is her murderer.

Doma is such a savage villain that made me hate him more than ever. He narrated the story like it was a sad story, but the tone changes overtime, and now, he called her a fool, a miserable dog, and meaningless. I like that small detail when he finally remembers her name, Kotoha, during the narration. That way, he can remember entirely, just so he can laugh at her existence. Damn. In all seriousness, writing perspective, he’s a hell of a villain. From his expression to his mannerism, he nails it.

Inosuke is a joy to watch, but this time, I feel so bad for him. Each breaking points have him react differently. From denial, to anger, to sadness, and finally, to completely rage. He didn’t even think he had a human mother until now. It’s saddening that he now remembers the warm feeling of motherly love. In a way, you can say he lost two now. I mean Shinobu is no mother, but her care was warm enough to cherish dearly. As for his rage, oh man, he is incredibly pissed. He doesn’t want to cut his neck; he want to send him straight to hell. Translation: carnage. As sad this chapter was, the ending left me incredibly hyped.

It was rough, brutal, and very solid chapter. It was a great storytelling about a poor girl who had nothing but hell, and her child, the only light, was let go to live in a much better place. I felt sympathy for both mother and son, Inosuke. Doma is an enticing villain; so much so, I really hate him. It’s all the merrier to root for the Demon Slayers and hope Doma get the worst death possible. It’s worth noting that he remembers everything, so no Akaza’s ending for him. The ending got me exhilarated for the next chapter. It’s time for Pig Assault; this time, it’ll be a massacre.

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #chapter 160 #review #spoilers

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thesevencrimesandpunishments · 5 years

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Chapter 3-Pride; Scene 2

Seven Crimes and Punishments, pages 61-70

The Demon of Pride worked hard. It worked very very hard.

His (her?) six wings flapped as hard as they could, and thanks to that we progressively increased the speed at which we moved. In no time at all we had managed to safely arrive at the place where the Lucifenia Palace had once been.

…Although, it still took quite a lot more time than it had with the Demon of Lust or Hänsel.

“Huff…Huff…How ‘bout that, we made it!” the rodent muttered, completely out of breath.

“…Well done.”

“Good grief! –In the first place, was there even any need to take you here at all!?”

“What do you mean?”

“All others aside, weren’t you personally involved with what happened with Riliane!? You would know all of it already even if you didn’t go to meet her now…More than anyone else, if I’m being untactful.”

“Well—I guess that’s true.”

“Michaela was probably just fussing on your behalf. Honestly, if only the day would come when I don’t have to listen to that crappy student--There’s no decency left in this world.”

No decency left in the world, to say nothing of the fact that the world had actually been destroyed.

That seemed to have had some sort of effect on the relationship between Michaela and the “Vessels of Deadly Sin”. The Demon of Lust had claimed that they just had nothing else to do, but judging by how the Demon of Pride was talking, there seemed to be some other reason for it.

After setting me down on the ground, the rodent once more spread its wings wide.

“I’m exhausted. I’m gonna head back and rest. You go on and enjoy your reunion with your long-absent friends as much as you can!”

The rodent shot up before I could give any thanks or goodbyes and flew off towards the Millenium Tree Forest.

The palace stood there before me. It was an illusory palace, much more splendid than the Venomania or Conchita mansions. Even after the Kingdom of Lucifenia fell and became a Republic, this palace continued to remain. It had been made into a tourist destination in recent years, but then it too had disappeared thanks to “Punishment”.

It was my former home.

The place where I had once spent my days as a servant.

“How nostalgic—” I said to myself without thinking.

My obediently following Sickle’s command to visit the “Deadly Sin Contractors” was so that I could come here like this.

To see her, the girl who was the master of this palace—

My older twin sister, Riliane.

The palace was packed with people.

Naturally, they were not living humans, but deceased souls. I was still altogether bewildered, not having expected so many of them to be here.

The people assembled here were not just those who had worked in the palace. There were several faces I didn’t recognize present. Come to think of it, considering this place had become a tourist site after the kingdom’s downfall, I had expected that there might be some sight-seers that were different from the time period where I had lived. Yet, judging from the clothing that everyone was wearing, that didn’t seem to be the case. All the uniforms and dresses that I saw looked very much like what one would see from the period of the Lucifenian Kingdom.

“Hey, if it isn’t Allen, my boy! Long time no see!”

Someone spoke up to me. It was a male voice I recognized.

When I turned around, I saw standing there a brown-haired, bespectacled man with a splendid appearance.

“Sir Keel…!”

“It’s been too long. You’re the only person I never saw up there, so I’d been quite worried. …I’d wondered if maybe you’d fallen down to the ‘Hellish Yard’.”

The head of the Freezis Trade Association, Keel Freezis. He had once saved the Kingdom of Lucifenia from famine, and then aided the side of the rebels during the revolution.

What was he doing here? When I asked, Keel gave a slightly troubled smile.

“Well, my daughter told me that she dearly wanted to attend the banquet tonight. So I’m sort of here as her chaperone.”

“Banquet--?”

“Ahh! Allen! Fancy seein’ you here!”

I heard someone else shouting behind me. This time it was a female voice. Thanks to her particular way of talking I could guess who it was even without turning around.

“Chartette…!? What in the world are you doing in that maid unifo—I thought you’d quit being a maid…”

“You’ve gotta come over and help out! We’ve got a whole heck of a lot of people here today, and we’re hardly prepped at all, yannow! Ney’s playin�� hooky somewhere too, yannow! And the head chamberlain’s in a foul mood, yannow!”

When she ran up to me, Chartette roughly grabbed my arm and started to pull me along.

“Wha!? Hold on—"

Still just as unbelievably strong. I was dragged away, unable to resist.

Captured by my old coworker Chartette Langley, I ended up being forced to help out with the banquet without any idea of what was actually going on.

“Head chamberlain! King Thorny’s meal isn’t ready yet!”

“What!? Olten, Asan! Hurry! Jet stream service!”

”Yes sir!”

All the servants were working busily. I myself was working without so much as time to breathe; helping with the cooking, carrying out the completed meals, telling guests where to find the restrooms, cleaning up wine that Chartette had spilled on the floor, and working on repairs to holes in the walls Chartette had opened up by bumping into them.

Though five hundred years had passed I surprisingly enough hadn’t lost my deeply ingrained sense for work. That must be the same for the other servants as well. Thanks to that the banquet was progressing without delay, but then as expected I hadn’t any time to speak to the head chamberlain or my other acquaintances.

What in the world was this banquet for? There were a lot of people I recognized among the guests, but I couldn’t see anywhere the center of the occasion. Yes, Riliane. Judging from the way things have been going she was probably the one holding the banquet, but if so that didn’t explain the reason for why so many people were gathered here like this.

Riliane was the “Daughter of Evil”—someone who had been despised by not only the people of her own country, but neighboring ones. Now that the kingdom had perished, there was no need for everyone to toady to her. So then, why—

“Allen! We’re not done yet! We’ve still got another big one, yannow!” Chartette was screaming.

A big one? …It can’t be!

“This is a bit of entertainment, from Princess Riliane to all of you!”

At Minister Minis’ words, I and the other servants carted the item out into the Hall of Mirrors.

“Ooooh…”

The guests were all in wonder.

What I had brought out—yes, it was an enormous candy castle.

Something similar had been at a banquet that had been held five hundred years ago…when Riliane was alive. It had been a symbol of pride, created out of her selfishness.

Back then, Riliane had smiled at it, extremely pleased. –But this time, she was nowhere to be found.

I steeled myself and tried asking Minis beside me where she was.

“Lord Minis. Where is the princess right n—”

And then, a bizarre twist occurred.

“Ta-daaaaaaaaaaaaa!”

And with that scream, something yellow jumped out from inside the candy castle before me.

“Wha!?”

Everyone’s eyes grew wide. Mine probably were too.

“Oh ho ho ho ho! I hope you’re having a good time, everyone! And now—come, bow to me!”

There was Riliane, making her signature phrase while covered in cream.

There were the shocked guests, the servants, and then me.

“R-Rilia—”

And then, right as I attempted to regain my composure and speak up to her.

“—Don’t be wasting the foood!”

Someone shouted that at her and rapidly dashed towards her.

It was an imposing woman—garbed in red armor.

It was the adoptive daughter of Leonhart of the Three Heroes, as well as the leader of the revolution.

And she was also my own adoptive older sister.

“Germaine…”

She pulled Riliane from her candy castle, and then fiercely brought her knuckles down on her head.

A dull noise resounded through the Hall of Mirrors.

“Uagh!? …Ooouch.”

“Take that as a punishment for a bad kid!”

“Y…you insolent thug! I’ll have you beheaded! Put you to the guillotine!”

“Oh ho? Go right ahead. I already died a long time ago, so I’m not scared in the least!”

“Grrrr...Th-then I’ll use magic! I’ll have Elluka turn you into a pig! Elluka! …Hey, Elluka!? Where is she!?”

But the court sorceress Elluka was nowhere to be seen.

“My, looks like your requested Miss Elluka isn’t anywhere around here. Weeell then, what shall you do, Your Majesty?”

“…Hmph! Enough! You big dummy.”

Riliane’s mood seemed to have completely soured. She shoved Germaine away and dashed off towards the entrance of the room.

I had watched the quarrel between my two sisters in a stupor, but as I saw Riliane running away I finally regained myself.

“Riliane!”

I headed for the door after her.

“--! A-Allen!? Wait a second!”

Noticing my presence there, Germaine flusteredly followed suit.

But someone extended a hand towards her as she did. That person’s hand gently stopped Germaine as she tried to pursue me.

“Hold up, Dad! Why’d you stop me!? Hey, Allen, wait—”

Sorry, Germaine. There’s a lot I want to talk about with you as well.

But right now—

Listening to Germaine’s voice behind me, I chased after Riliane.

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a34534567 · 5 years

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psych ward au, (krizette, b’shira, satomi)

cw for the obvious hospitalization, themes around mental illness, gaslighting+depersonlization (in response to neglectful childhood), auditory hallucinations

Krizette often wondered if she truly needed this, she didn't exactly hate the unit, it had it's ups and downs; It reminded her of home sometimes, with all the rules, but they had good ice cream! And she was able to make friends!

Even if they weren't allowed to hug, or even hold hands, touching other patients was prohibited, and she while she had to leave her insect friends, sometimes spiders, or centipedes would slip past the nurses' cleaning, she had multiple empty soda bottles, and plastic cups that she'd catch them in.

It's... not like she's actually suicidal, she was ruled to spend time in the unit after a slow downfall after leaving her parent's grasp. She became impulsive, the her she saw, and the her others saw were drastically different.

She wasn't Oliviae, she was Krizette! She didn't have neglectful parents, her parents were two great healers who guided her to a life of helping people! They tell her this is escapism, depersonalisation, they tell her it’s as if she's repeatedly erasing, and rewriting chapters when she should be continuing a new story, that she’s completely denying her past, taking on an entirely new persona.

She became soon friends with her roommate, a girl much smaller than her, although only a few years younger. Her soft features clashed with her narrowed eyes, messy hair that looked as if it wasn't brushed in ages, and her tail was constantly flicking back and forth (a habit former from paranoia, she learned.)

B'Shira heard voices, they weren't scary, not to her, she learned about auditory hallucinations through movies, demonized issues that drove a person mad, but she wasn't mad. The voices were nice to her, they were hurt, mournful lost souls who needed company. When she met Krizette, she was taken aback, when the other girl invaded her personal space, but threw her off with

"Who's your friend?" This was odd, most everyone in the ward avoided B'Shira, especially once she started murmuring to herself (not to herself, no, but that's their ignorance.) She froze up, staring at Krizette like she had been caught doing something wrong.

"Ah ... Um ... Layna .. that's her name.."

Krizette's eyes sparkles with curiosity, her head darting around. "Well, Layna, I can't see you but hello!"

B'Shira hid her smile with her pajama sleeve, as she felt like perhaps, she might have someone physical to talk to.

Possibly the most interesting of the unit was a woman named Satomi, who was often the source of shouting, whether it be because she wanted to smoke (they /were/ allowed to, if they reached level three, which granted them outside time as long as it was supervised,) or simply because she knew it'd get everyone to stop what they were doing and just *look* at her (ward veterans tone her out, but Krizette was always interested in what she had to say.)

Satomi was littered in scars, Satomi would ramble about how many people she’s slept with, or what substances she would partake in, Satomi would tell stories of how she got weak-minded ‘idiots’ to do whatever she wanted. She wasn’t someone to admire, that’s for sure... but...

Krizette was almost jealous of Satomi, in a way, as she would go on about the evils in life, how the staff wanted her dead, how people are against her.

Krizette could never feel that way, she reflects on how she still felt bad for burdening her parents, still fighting her mind about who was in the right, they most definitely just wanted her to grow up smart, and successful, right?

...

Right? This is the one thought that makes it hard for her to sleep, long nights, staring up at the ceiling, all other sounds drowned out as her own mind deals cards with itself, trying to win against the poisoning thoughts of guilt.

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viampythonissam · 5 years

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Intro, continued...

It was then I became obsessed with death and the occult, desperately trying to make contact with my grandfather through anything possible. Being clairaudient, I was expecting to hear a message from my grandfather all throughtout the whole funeral and mourning period, but to no avail. So in my desparation, I went into research, and stumbled upon things such as the ouija, seances, and many more. I even considered dabbling into necromancy, just in order to hear from him again. His death broke me so much that I was for the most time wishing I were dead too. I had suicidal thoughts but somehow something has prevented me from attempting. It could be I'm too chicken to hurt myself (getting hurt by other things besides self-infliction doesn't scare me though) or the thought of my mother crying over my dead body is another thing that would crush my heart.

I started questioning my religious beliefs then. We were Roman Catholics, and we go to church, but not too often. I am very religious though when I was a child, having been schooled in a private Catholic school, and I know all the prayers by heart; but it all changed. I felt resentment for praying so hard but never getting answered. That everything happens for a reason. A reason still so vague to me to this day, which I continue to believe was the same reason of the breaking apart of this family and eventual downfall. The family is in ruins, and the family home is crumbling apart. My father's only brother, my uncle Aldrin, died a little over two years after my grandfather; and his widow and only child, my cousin, was estranged ever since then, because of inheritance issues. My father decided to sell the house, my childhood home because of this; splitting the family fortune already so that we can all go off our separate ways and stop the bickering. The only thing that's keeping him from doing so is my grandmother who is still so attached to the house built by my grandfather.

At 16, I eventually traversed my way into the craft, dabbling on it. There was a kind of pull into these mystics that appealed to someone like me. Was it power? Was it danger? Mystery, perhaps? Or maybe I just got all too familiar with the unknown for me to be comfortable chasing after it? This craft, shunned by my faith since the dawn of time and even killed tons of people because of it, felt like home to me; learning it felt like retracing my steps back from where I came from. There was a sense of calm, relief, and freedom learning the ways of the earth, elements, and spirits and those who came before. Its unrestrictive nature was a stark contrast to the repressive and dominating teachings of the Catholic scriptures. Wherein Christianity demands a million things to do and not to do to save your soul, the craft only ever wanted you to do anything you want, just as long you harm none, even yourself. I have a lot of arguments to make against my old faith, that's why I consider myself an agnostic in all fairness. That's a topic for another day.

When I got to college at 17, I applied for nursing school under my father's wishes. It was in my misfortune to be enrolled in a school with a toxic environment of sorts: unhealthy clinic hours, unreasonable school workload, toxic Christian classmates who bombarded me everyday with bible verses and inviting me to join Sunday worship thingies. I am very respectful of other's beliefs and opinions but I really have a bone to pick with the Born Agains because upon knowing I am interested in dark movies and occult, they've started telling me that the Devil has a grip on my soul and that I should stop it so that my soul can be saved. They're even worse than the Mormons and Witnesses who knock on your door at certain days. I'd just ignore it and they'll go but BAs will stop at nothing to guiltify me of being possessed and that I need deliverance. It was also the time my parents went to Australia for work because of the failing finances due to to my late grandfather's hospital expenses, my uncle meeting his untimely demise, and my uncle's greedy widow who already demanded their inheritance even though my grandmother was still alive. My best friends of highschool also attended different schools and pursued different career pathways which left me feeling more isolated and unsure of myself. These issues fed my undiagnosed depression and relapse of suicidal thoughts all throughout my 4 years in nursing school. It was a mix of emotions, a rollercoaster ride of disappointments, achievements, first-time experiences, full independence. All without a proper support system. Nevertheless, I grew wiser while treading the craft, and for the first time since I lost my grandfather, I felt safe and sound and complete.

Then I met my elementary school sweetheart again in my final year and we became a couple. He was a sweet guy, smart and responsible. We had our similarities, our quirks, but we also had differences. I was already quite a learned witch, studying tarot and palmistry as my supposed-to-be expertise, when he told me how he wanted to be baptised as a Born Again (he and his family are Roman Catholics as well). He told me how he was deeply affected by the one time he went to a worship service of his friend's church. This struck a chord in me, a subtle reference to my beliefs. At the time, I have fully believed he is the man I'm gonna settle for, the one I'm gonna marry. He's everything I have hoped for then: he's finished school, on his way to a very decent career on a ship as a marine engineer. He's from a good family as well. Well-mannered, and not to mention that we've got a pretty long history way back when we we're 10 or so. He even made a subtle proposal of a civil marriage before he hops on board the ship. I know it was betrayal of myself, but I love this man so much so, I am ready to submit myself to him.

Worst decision of my life. I started to try and mingle with Christians so I may understand just why I needed to be saved. I joined worship services and sang with them against my own beliefs. I taught myself to be like them just so I could fit in, so that I may have friends. In return, they've burned all my books and tarot decks. Even my Slipknot t-shirt that my grandmother bought me was not spared from the Christian pyre. Said that it's to release me from the grip of the Devil. They even did deliverance to me. For a while I thought I was given a new lease on life and that this is the only right thing to do. I was easily convinced since it was the most trying time of my life so far: I was killing myself reviewing for the nursing licensure exams, my parents are already coming to get us and live away in Australia for good, my bf and I hit rock bottom and broke up (the girl who is the 3rd party confessed to me that they're having an affair, and that she was so guilty she can't sleep at night knowing we are good friends and they're doing this behind my back, also I've noticed red flags about him that made me doubt him a bit. I factored everything and the dots connected like a damn constellation so I've called it quits), and I was caught in an identity crisis because of inner turmoil. Maybe it was a time of personal upheaval and the mix of situations was too much for me to handle. Maybe it was a good thing though that I never got baptised because my life just got much more complicated after that.

So I did pass the licensures, ex and I never got together again, I went to live to Australia, but I never recovered from the inner turmoil thing; which made me spiral down again the depression lane, this time in its dangerous, ugliest and darkest recesses. I was fighting with my parents which I never did before, I was angry all the time. I started drinking then and I was exhausted all the time I just want to sleep. All the activities I've enjoyed before like sketching, playing the piano, afternoon strolls, and cooking for the family, I've totally lost interest in. My health deteriorated and I cut off and isolated myself from my friends overseas, ignoring their messages and emails. I tried to cope up by immersing myself in Christian songs and scriptures but it was not enough. I was still empty and numb. I was like a zombie, waking up just enough not to get late for work, then go home after, eat unhealthily, play video games, chug a bottle or two of beer, surf the net for worthless and trivial things, and sleep very late, like around 3 to 5 am, only to wake up again a few hours later for work. This was a vicious daily cycle that went on for 4 years. The only reprieve I had was my video games, and my sombre playlist, just enough to block the deafening screams of suicidal thoughts and ideations before I go to sleep. There was also a time I was going home from my internship waiting for the train home, that I thought of just jumping on the train tracks to end the struggle and pain. I was more than ready to attempt as I felt braver now. That was the time I lost all fear for death. Hell, I was ready to buy a rope at Bunnings too as well. But at the back of my head, the same sad picture of my mother crying over my dead body stops me from doing such thing. They said the deliverance was supposed to stop these things, but guess what? It was it that brought it back. It was supposed to keep the demons away, but it did the opposite, and felt so trapped in a cage of deceit and lies. I was supposed to be saved, but why did it felt like I was dying?

It was then I pondered over everything that's happened in my life so far. Where did I fall, where did I stand tall, where did I pick myself up? I thought long and hard enough and decided to start off where it began to crumble: back home. Retracing my steps back to Manila, now 25, I found my old stuff in my old room, before things happened. It reminded me of my simple life and my freedom and innocence. Back when I had complete control of my life. Back when I was the master of my fate. I let the people around me convince me that the man from the sky take the wheel, and it damn well crashed. A head-on collision with a destructive force. I decided to go back to my roots, the one where I felt best. And embracing it tighter than ever and promising to never betray it anymore for any reason.

My ex is now preparing to marry his girlfriend of 3 years. We met accidentally and forgave him already. I'm happy for him and that hopefully his happiness continue on. My old friends are still my friends, but there's already a notable gap between which I do not intend to close at all anymore. I do have new friends now and I keep a healthy distance from them whilst making a worthwhile connection. I am now preparing to enter med school in August and become a surgeon someday. The old house is in shambles, and I realized that a house is not a home, but the family that lives in it. I miss my parents and that my family will always come first, but I am happy to be more independent now and live by myself while studying medicine. Things are well between me and my cousin (my late uncle's child) and that I have forgiven his mother already for the hurt and trouble that they caused us. We see each other as he visits me and grandmother here at the old house every 2 months. When BAs, Mormons, and other religions try to do bible study to me, I am now assertive to tell them that I am agnostic and that I am firm in my beliefs. I am now recovering from my self-destructive ways and more optimistic and living healthier. Love is around, but it felt to me that I have lots to undertake first before I commit myself to someone again. I have backlogged so much that my time has to be devoted to the craft, my family and myself first before anything else. I am trying hard to pick up all the pieces and it seems things are finally going back in its right place. And the craft, after all these years, welcomed me back with open arms without any questions, like a mother does to her child. The sun, moon and the stars never shone brighter before, the day I returned home and answered its longing call.

Now. I have to let this off my chest now once and for all. Pleasure. Why is it a sin to pursue whatever makes you happy? Why must you endure pain just so you can be saved? Isn't that a crooked logic? Why must you be averse to your own will just so you get into a good place in the afterlife? I am only human, I am flawed, but it isn't my fault because I was born and created this way. Why must I be punished for something that is natural for me? If being free and happy costs me a one-way ticket to Hell, then I'd best be off. If my witchcraft, which teaches the opposite of your tyrannic religion, is a surefire way to deliver me there, then I'll make sure I will be a remarkable witch and enjoy my lifetime, and be very ecstatic to march down the fiery highway to Hell after I am gone. But I will never again submit myself to a narcissistic, psychopathic religion who has to kill millions of innocent people, and shun and humiliate people who think in contrast, just to justify and preach the existence of their god and its scriptures. My argument does not end with this and I will not back down anymore in defending my faith.

The craft is my world, and nature is my home. I am a daughter of those who came before, of those who are truly enlightened, of those you can never ever kill. I am a witch, and you can never take that away from me again.

*** Sorry for the long post. Thanks for reading, if you did. I hope you had something to take from my story and may it help you with whatever is botheringvor troubling you right now.

May the journey of life be kind to us all. Blessed be! ❤

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hex-perks · 6 years

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A collection of songs I felt fit the ship. Give it a listen! Song links are also below!

Feel It Still: “I’m a rebel just for kicks, now.” Think I’ll “Your love is an abyss for my heart to eclipse, now”

Immortals: “I’ll be the guard dog of all your favorite dreams” “I try to picture me without you but I can’t”

My Demons: “They wanna break me and wash away my colors” “Oh you make everything okay”

Best Song Ever: “Maybe it’s the way she walked Straight into my heart and stole it Through the doors and past the guards Just like she already owned it” “I said, “Can you give it back to me?” She said, “Never in your wildest dreams”

This is gospel: “The gnashing teeth and criminal tongues conspire against the odds But they haven’t seen the best of us yet” “If you love me let me go”

Angel With A Shotgun: “They say before you start a war You better know what you’re fighting for Well baby, you are all that I adore If love is what you need A soldier I will be” “I’ll throw away my faith, babe Just to keep you safe Don’t you know you’re everything I have”

The Other Side: “In the beginning I never thought it would be you” “And I know we ain’t friends anymore If we walk down this road We’ll be lovers for sure”

Hero’s: “Everyday people do everyday things but I Can’t be one of them I know you hear me now, we are a different kind We can do anything” “All we’re looking for is love and a little light”

Geronimo: “Can you feel my love?” “So it’s here I stand, As a broken man, But I’ve found my friend, At the curtains of the waterfall.”

All Of Me: “What would I do without your smart mouth? Drawing me in and you kicking me out You got my head spinning, no kidding, I can’t pin you down” “Love your curves and all your edges All your perfect imperfections” “You’re my downfall, you’re my muse My worst distraction, my rhythm and blues”

Just The Way You Are: “Yeah, I know, I know When I compliment her she won’t believe me And it’s so, it’s so Sad to think that she don’t see what I see” “I’d never ask you to change If perfect’s what you’re searching for Then just stay the same”

Hey, Soul Sister: “I’m so glad you have a one-track mind like me” “You see I can be myself now finally In fact there’s nothing I can’t be I want the world to see you’ll be With me”

Let Me Love You: “Much as you blame yourself, you can’t be blamed for the way that you feel” “I can see the pain behind your eyes It’s been there for quite a while I just wanna be the one to remind you what it is to smile I would like to show you what true love can really do”

Stay: “Make it on your own, but we don’t have to grow up We can stay forever young” “Won’t admit what I already know I’ve never been the best at letting go”

Like I’m Gonna Lose You: “Wherever we’re standing, I won’t take you for granted Cause we’ll never know when When we’ll run out of time” “So let’s take our time to say what we want Use what we got before it’s all gone No, we’re not promised tomorrow”

Nothing On You: “Beautiful girls, all over the world I could be chasin but my time would be wasted They got nothin on you, baby” “Hands down, there will never be another one I been around and I never seen another one ”

Crazy In Love: “When you leave I’m begging you not to go Call your name two or three times in a row Such a funny thing for me to try to explain How I’m feeling and my pride is the one to blame” “It’s the way that you know what I thought I knew It’s the beat that my heart skips when I’m with you”

Give Your Heart Break: “Don’t wanna break your heart I wanna give your heart a break I know you’re scared it’s wrong Like you might make a mistake” “The world is ours if we want it We can take it, if you just take my hand”

Sledgehammer: “every minute That I’m with you I feel the fever and I won’t lie I break a sweat My body’s telling All the secrets I ain’t told you yet” “And my fire’s waitin’ for your spark”

I Really Like You: “I don’t know how to act Or if I should be leaving I’m running out of time Going out of my mind” “I feel like I could fly with the boy on the moon”

Love Me Like You Do: “Let me take you past the satellites You can see the world you brought to life, to life” “Only you can set my heart on fire”

Glad you came: “You hit me like the sky fell on me, fell on me And I decided you look well on me, well on me” “Can you spend a little time Time is slipping away Away from us so stay Stay with me I can make Make you glad you came”

One Call Away: “I’m only one call away I’ll be there to save the day Superman, got nothing on me” “Come along with me and don’t be scared I just wanna set you free”

Herp De Derp: “I’m not this awkward all the time Only when love is on the line” “I may just be a crazy dreamer But you can make a dreamer’s wildest dreams come true”

Still Into You: “It’s not a walk in the park To love each other But when our fingers interlock Can’t deny, can’t deny you’re worth it” “Some things just, some things just make sense And one of those is you and I”

Boom Clap: “Sunbathing under the moon Stars shining as your bones illuminate” “You take me over, you’re the magic in my veins This must be love”

Shut Up And Dance: “A backless dress and some beat up sneaks My discotheque Juliet, teenage dream” “I felt it in my chest since she looked at me I knew we were bound to be together Bound to be together”

In The Name Of Love: “When there’s madness, when there’s poison in your head When the sadness leaves you broken in your bed I will hold you in the depths of your despair And it’s all in the name of love” “If I told you this was only gonna hurt If I warned you that the fire’s gonna burn Would you walk in? Would you let me do it first?”

Don’t Let Me Down: “It’s in my head, darling I hope That you’ll be here, when I need you the most” “Right now I need a miracle Hurry up now, I need a miracle”

Perfect Duet: “Cause we were just kids when we fell in love Not knowin’ what it was I will not give you up this time” “I found a love To carry more than just my secrets To carry love”

I’m Yours: “I cannot wait, I’m yours" “And it’s our godforsaken right to be loved"

Screen love: “Oh I never thought that I would want to spend my time staring at my phone and waiting for you to reply” “You light be up like a beam when I see you through my screen”

Ultimately: “I try to do the best I can, I know you try to do the same. We’re just so bound to make mistakes, call it a disposition.” “I think I’m better when I’m with you, But I worry when you’re gone.”

Cliché: “I just stared,and you just grinned and it felt like one big whirlwind. One big emotional whirlwind.” “I looked up at your face, and those eyes drew me in.”

How To Say Sorry: “If I could make you believe again I would.” “I thought I had to make you see things from my side.”

Not My Type: “You make me feel like I’m right where I belong.” “You say you’re not my type but I don’t think that’s true.”

You’re The Reason: “And I was I sure that you were nothing short of ignorant Failure always imminent The kind of girl who stumbles through her life, a village idiot But oh I was wrong” “The wrinkles on your sweater, or the way your clothes lack synergy A scuff you never buffed away, nothing’s what it seems to be We’ve both been missing something since I lost the gift of empathy”

Paint Me: “White, when I didn’t have you I was white like a canvas I was lonely but my days were peaceful, they were always” “I’m being painted one by one, like watercolors I am being carved here and there, like a tattoo Everywhere you touched me There’s a different color of Memories that are coated over It’s becoming darker and darker Like a black night”

Wherever You Are: “Wherever you are, I always make you smile Wherever you are, I’m always by your side Whatever you say, you’re always on my mind” “Someone I can love from my heart. Someone I love from my heart. In the center of my love, you, my heart, are there.”

Symphony:

“I’ve been hearin' symphonies Before, all I heard was silence A rhapsody for you and me And every melody is timeless”

“ And when you’re gone, I feel incomplete So, if you want the truth... “

This Is Home:

“Turn off your porcelain face, I can't really think right now and this place Has too many colours enough to drive all of us insane Are you dead? Sometimes I think I'm dead Cause I can feel ghosts and ghouls wrapping my head But I don't wanna fall asleep just yet “

“Get a load of this trainwreck His hair's a mess and he doesn't know who he is yet But little do we know, the stars Welcome him with open arms”

#yutaba #yusuke kitagawa #futaba sakura #yusuke/futaba #futaba/yusuke #yusukexfutaba #futabaxyusuke #long post #sorry ik its rlly long #its 2hrs of mood music sooooo

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gadgetgirl71 · 4 years

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Top Ten Tuesday 15 September 2020

Welcome to this weeks Top Ten Tuesday. Originally created by The Broke & The Bookish, which is now hosted by Jana @ That Artsy Reader Girl. Each week it features a book or literary themed category. This weeks prompt is:

Cover Freebie:

(choose your own topic, centred on book covers or cover art)

So I have chosen to list my favourite MC (Motorcycle Club) Covers.

Baker (The Devil’s Disciples MC #1) by Scott Hildreth

ANDY: I got a job next door to a tattooed biker named Baker. He was an outlaw, a criminal, a biker, a bad boy, and a thief. I should have run as far and fast as I could. Instead, on the day we met, I let him have his way with me. I couldn’t help myself. His intensity and swagger lured me, but it was the crazy sex that kept me coming back, day after day.

His sordid ways scared me, but I simply couldn’t stay away…

BAKER: When she moved in next door, I knew I was in trouble. She was sexy. She was irresistible. She had spunk. She was also the manager of a bank my MC robbed six months prior. She didn’t recognize me, because we wore masks during the robbery. If she ever found out who I really was, there would be hell to pay.

It would be nothing like the hell I’d be living in if my MC found out I was fucking her.

We’d issued an order to kill her on sight. She was off-limits if anyone ever was.

So far, the men in the MC hadn’t seen her. But, I couldn’t keep her hidden forever.

Beyond Reckless (Lost kings MC #8) by Autumn Jones Lake

Marcel “Teller” Whelan, Treasurer of the Lost Kings MC, has always been two things—honest and responsible. At ten years old, he was already taking care of his baby sister. At eighteen, he patched into the Lost Kings MC and took a major role in shaping the club’s future. Three years ago, he thought he’d met the perfect woman, only to have her reject everything he is—a Lost King. One bullet is a lifetime supply. Now, after an accident that left a girl dead and Teller almost crippled, he’s struggling through the darkest time in his life. His niece, sister, and Lost Kings MC family are the only things holding him together, but his reckless actions are bound to drive everyone away. Then, in the most unlikely place, he crosses paths with her again. The woman he once thought might be his perfect match. Love soothes our inner demons. Sparks fly for both of them. She’s the ride-or-die woman he needs, able to calm his many demons and bring the light back into his life. But she has a secret—one that forces him to lie to his brothers. In chaos we trust. When Teller’s brothers find out who he’s falling in love with, it will create a storm of chaos for the Lost Kings MC. But if there’s one thing Teller’s turbulent life has taught him, it’s that sometimes love is worth the chaos. Beyond Reckless is the 8th book in the popular Lost Kings MC series, but can be read as a standalone.

Big (Satan’ Fury MC #6) by L Wilder

How much would you risk to save the one you love? From NYT and USA Today Bestselling Author L. Wilder comes book six in the Satan’s Fury Series, a standalone MC romance.

Big: I don’t use a knife or a gun to get the guy I’m after. I find that my weapon of choice has a much longer, more crippling effect. With just a few keystrokes, I can have him scrambling for his life. I’ll take everything he’s ever worked for, everything he’s ever loved, and I’ll destroy it. That’s what I do.

My brothers don’t ask questions. They don’t want to know what I do behind the closed door. They know I bring results, and that’s all that matters. It’s my job to protect the club, and nothing is going to stand in my way–not even Josie Carmichael.

The girl with the tantalizing curves and emerald green eyes is an unexpected threat, but a threat nonetheless. It’s my job to take her down, but there’s just one hitch. I can’t get the smart-mouthed beauty out of my head. She’s trouble. The kind of trouble that would turn my whole world upside down, but I don’t give a damn. I want her.

Josie Carmichael will be mine, even if that means I’ve got to break her first.

Big is book six of the Satan’s Fury MC series. This book is a full-length standalone novel that’s intended for mature audiences due to the explicit language and violence. Reader discretion is advised.

Bull (Kings of Mayhem MC #6) by Penny Dee

She could be the end of me BULL: I lost my wife on a rainy night almost two decades ago. Since then, my heart has been a barren wasteland. It only knows love for family and the club. And for revenge. Then I meet Taylor and I know I’m doomed. Because she’s everything I didn’t know I wanted. Everything I’ve denied myself for years. But my club is about to storm headfirst into a war and I can’t afford the distraction. Yet I can’t get her out of my head. We both say we’re not interested. But we are both liars. TAYLOR: For years we’ve been running from my past. My kid brother and me. Hiding in the shadows. Now we have a chance for a new life in a new town … far, far away from trouble. I crave freedom and a quiet, simple life for us both. The last thing I expect is to fall for the enigmatic biker king, Michael “Bull” Western. He is magnificent. White-hot and scorching. With the touch of an angel and eyes of the devil. He could be the love of my life. But I have a secret. A very big secret indeed … Bull is book six in the Kings of Mayhem MC series. For mature readers 18+.

Claiming Mine (Unforgiven Riders MC #1) by Amy Davies

Sex, secrets and motorbikes.

When Ana starts working in a small but quaint café, after running from her old life, she never expects to be surrounded by sexy as sin men… Little does she realise they belong to the local motorcycle club. She’s had more than enough of controlling alphas in her life, but can she keep away from them?

Ace is the Sergeant-at-Arms of the Unforgiven Riders and yet another controlling alpha. He sees Ana’s reluctance to him, but Ace always gets his own way, and he wants Ana. Will Ace be able to prove his feelings for her and break down the walls of protection Ana has built around her heart? Can she let him in?

When secrets of Ana’s past are revealed and her life is threatened, it’s Ace’s job to save her. But will he be too late? Will Ace still want her when he finds out about her past?

Compass (Valiant MC #1) by Mary B Moore

Piper: When Hunter left, he cut me out of his life with no explanation. I sent him letters, but each time they were returned back to me. I had no choice but to raise my son alone and move on with life. I love being a mother, but every day I miss the other half of my soul.

Hunter: Four years ago, I joined the Marines. What I did for my country changed me. I saw my buddies, men that I’d fought alongside return home and set up their lives. Seeing them settling down, I took a risk and returned home to the woman that I’d left behind.

War changes a man. A majority of our military come home scarred inside and struggle to return to the civilian world. Learning from my friends in Piersville, I’ve established an MC called Valiant. Our training and military contacts will help assist the government with tackling the ongoing issues of human, drug, and arms trafficking along North and South America. Those responsible are like the mythical Hydra – cut off one head and two replace it.

I’m willing to fight that war, but more importantly, I’m going to fight the battle to get Piper back and become a father to my son.

Link’d Up (Dead Presidents MC #1) by Harley Stone

President Tyler “Link” Lincoln of the Dead Presidents MC, runs a club dedicated to helping military vets readjust to society. When his sergeant at arms is arrested for the attempted murder of a prominent Seattle figure, Link’s search for a lawyer brave enough to fight for justice leads him to an alluring defence attorney with a bleeding heart and a steel backbone.

This isn’t the first time Emily Stafford’s commitment to defending the falsely accused has put her in harm’s way. Smart, cautious, and independent, she knows how to defend herself. At least, she did until she joined forces with one sexy, overbearing, tattooed MC president.

Flames run hot as Link and Emily seek shelter in the club’s converted fire station, working against the clock to uncover the truth and save a somewhat innocent man.

18+ for language and sexual situations…

Primal Howl (Primal Howlers MC #1) by Piper Davenport

Orion: I’m the oldest son of MC royalty. My father founded the Primal Howlers and he expects me to wear his patch one day. The problem is, I don’t know if that’s what I want. Lately, I couldn’t give two sh*ts about anything.

Until her.

Raquel: I moved to Monument, Colorado to write my thesis and get some much-needed distance from my overbearing family. What I didn’t expect was to find is myself hung up on a biker who appears to have nothing to lose.

I, however, have everything to lose and I’m worried Orion just might be my downfall.

Stitch (Satan’s Fury MC #2) by L Wilder

From New York Times and USA Today Best Selling author L Wilder

Stitch: As the club Enforcer, Stitch is the man chosen to protect the club. There are no limits to his brutality, no lines drawn in the sand. The club is his life, and he’ll do whatever it takes to keep his brothers safe.

He’s a man who keeps to himself, guarding the walls that he secured so long ago. Then, one moment, one chance meeting, changes everything.

Wren: Life for Wren and her son, Wyatt, isn’t exactly easy. Yet, Wren faces each day with determination and courage. Wyatt is her joy and motivation; for him, she will find a way to make their lives better, even when obstacles are continually thrown in her path. The last thing she needs is another complication, but what is life without complications?

Stitch appears when they need him the most, protecting them when no one else can. Wren can’t understand it. She should feel threatened by his bulging muscles and menacing tattoos, but she’s somehow able to see past the mysterious biker to the man inside. She is drawn to him for reasons she can’t even begin to comprehend. All she knows is that her body craves his touch.

Can Stitch let his guard down and allow these two strangers into his heart? Can Wren see beyond the scars of her past long enough to let him in, or will her fear drive him away?

** This book is intended for readers 18 years or older due to bad language, violence, and explicit sex scenes.

Stitch is a standalone romance, but you may also be interested in reading Maverick: Satan’s Fury MC #1.

The Diary of Bink Cummings Vol #2 by Bink Cummings

Note: Must Read The Diary of Bink Cummings Vol 1, previously.

When changing life’s course you never consider what twisted curve-ball fate might dump in your lap. Growing up in the MC, then gaining my own personal independence was not only a curse, it was a blessing. So when I decided to say fu*k my past and embraced my future, away from the only place I called home, I tried to re-invent myself, by becoming the woman I am today. Until one day, fate reared its ugly head, forcing me to return to the place I ran from. The place where I had no choice but to face HIM. And hide the biggest secret of my life as I wallowed in silent fear, of the insurmountable repercussions it would evoke when anyone found out the truth.

Steamy Adult romance Warning: Contains Mature scenarios, and mass quantities of profanity. For Ages 18+

-This is not a Standalone.

I’m sure that some of the men on these covers are the same person! What do you think?

*** This majority of these books are intended for readers 18 years or older due to bad language, violence, and explicit sex scenes. ***

Until next Tuesday

#BikerErotica, #BikerRomance, #Bikers, #JustForFun, #MC, #MC-Erotica, #MCRomance, #Top Ten Tuesday, #TopTenTuesday, #TTT

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ask-the-equestrians · 6 years

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Hello Everyone, we got a special Segment to talk about today. It's time to reintroduce you all to "The Demon King of the Shadows" Axel Doi. This is actually my True Avatar, despite using Maya Doi as my mascot in this page. He's probably the only male character that I made thus far, and I actually used my own face to help model this version, however, you'll be seeing him wearing that mask more often then not. (I'll explain the mask later.) Axel Doi is or was a once fierce Warlord who had an idea of Uniting his separated Nation of Forfedre and Uniting his nation with Lady Keiko Matsui's Nation of the Eastern Republic, but his ambitions overtook him and he was slowly became demented and eventually became a demon. Lady Maya Matsui sacrificed herself to Stop Axel from completely destroying her country which led to the birth of their reincarnation Maya Doi. If Maya didn't stop Axel from destroying her land, he would of slain her mother and invade Equestria next. Axel Doi is Maya Doi's other previous incarnation. Axel's memories is manly inside of The Equestrian Maya. Because of this, Maya suffers from an extreme identity crisis as she get distinguish herself as "The Deity of Passion" or "The Demon King of the Shadows." It is now time to open the history of Axel Doi. (Not me the artist of course. I already open myself when I remade Lady Keiko Matsui.) The Rise of a Lonely King (Axel Doi's Origins) Axel never really had it easy to begin with. He was born as a peasant in his land and was never really taken seriously in his young life. He was mostly ignore by other people and was laugh and mock at for having ambitions that appears to be beyond his reach. Axel wanted more for his life. He wanted to be remember for something, because he can't stand the existence that he was force to be born in. One day Axel came across a welcoming ceremony for the Three Deities. Axel's eyes was on the Empress Deity, Lady Keiko Matsui. As awe stuck to this foreign beauty, Axel ask one of the guards about the Empress and the guards tell him a little about Lady Keiko and her daughters. That Day changed is his life, now that he has a goal he wishes to achieve. He's going to join the royal guards and rise up on the ranks and eventually become King, and one day have The Empress Deity as his wife. His new ambition doesn't come without more mockery and ridicule, but nothing can't stop him from becoming King. He tore off his critics telling them "It doesn't matter if you think I'm don't have the complicity to become king. I finally have something I wanted for once in my life. How about you? Of all the mockery you made of me, can you ever say the same for yourself or is this hell hold is enough you while you wither away and be lost in time?" Axel later left his home to join the Royal Guard. During the time in the castle, Axel undergo really hard training in become a knight. Their were long days and nights being pushed to the limits both physically and mentally. Despite, being practically torture in his first year in training, Axel ambitions still burn inside his heart, and the image of Lady Keiko still reminds in his memories. Because of that, he was manage to withstand the toughies of training and rank highest in his class. Despite achieving the highest rank, Axel wasn't really popular among his peers. His comrades find Axel to be off and thinks his ideas and ambition is unrealistic for even someone like him to achieve, but despite all of that Axel is more then willing to prove to all of them that he will one day achieve the goal that he set for himself. When the nation of Forfedre was under attack against a rival Nation, Axel was on the front line of the battlefield. Leading a small group of army, he nearly destroy more than half of the enemies moral. Axel was knighted as a high ranking officer and his goal of becoming King was getting closer. Even becoming a high ranking General in the royal guard, his family and old "friends" still criticizes and mock him saying "The delusional fool will never understand, he won't become king." Ironically, a few years later the previous king dies from a mysterious illness and without a heir, Axel took control of the throne and became the New King of Forfedre. Axel did not receive a heart warming welcoming from his new subjects we he became king at first. The Critics and Naysayers that been mocking Axel though out his life is now protesting against Axel, accusing him of assassinating the previous king. Axel had enough with the ridicule from the people, Axel order his guards to round up the people that still mocks him and have them come to his throne. Axel Confront them for the last time. Axel stated to them, "My entire life you all doubt me. Told me I will never achieve my goal, because I was a mere peasant. Now this mere peasant stands before you as your Ruler hold your life in his hands. Do you wish to continue to mock me despite proving to you what I'm capable of, or will you still continue to be deluded to your reality and believe I'm still a useless little boy that can only dream?" Those group of people says to him "You were never worthy of ruling over us. You cheated your way and stole the kingship for yourself. You will always be that foolish kid who will not know he place in this world. We will never recognize you as king." Axel order the guards for their execution and have their bodies impelled as a warning to anyone who wish to mock Lord Axel. The Rise and Downfall of Axel Doi Axel did achieve part of his goal of become King but not the respect of the subjects he rule over. Axel lacks the charisma to sway his subjects to follower him and his ideals, and if he doesn't find a way to united the nation that was separated because of his reign, the rebels will eventually try to overtake the kingdom and try to assassinate him. Axel had a meeting with the generals who still serves him and planned to united the country by force by killing the rebel group and their leaders and make in example of them with a public execution. This has finally united the nation but made made Axel be a feared ruler. Stories and legends of him has begun to spread, but as a warning and an antagonistic world view. These story will become a part of Axel's downfall in the future. Despite reunited the nation of Forfedre, Axel is feared and unchallenged. Axel need to change the opinions of his subject somehow, so he decides to proceed in his second goal in to Seek out Lady Keiko and you the two nation by taking her as his wife. At long last, Axel can finally meet the Deity that inspire him to become King and have her with him forever, but when Axel arrive to the Eastern Republic and meet Lady Keiko, she did not say a word to Axel and turn her back to him left to return to her temple. Axel was completely humiliated. As Lady Keiko walks away from Axel, he said to her "I've did all of this for you. You were the only thing that keep me going we everyone around me told me I'll never succeed. I would of even stay behind your shadows if you let me... Why did you turn your back to me!? If that's how it's going to be I'll make sure you rue the day you humiliated me like this!! I will burn this entire nation down to the ground!!! All of your love ones will surfer before they die and it will be all your fault!! DO YOU HEAR ME!!?? KEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIKKKKOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!" Lady Keiko's guards throw Axel out of the country and he left to return home brokenhearted and full of hatred. Later that day his body begin to change, his eyes darken, and he sprouted wings. Any traced of humanity Axel had left has now disappear and he became a Demon of Despair. The Demon King's Domination and Defeat Several Hundred Years has passed Axel's human Body is far since gone and is replace by his Demon form thanks to the legends that's based off of his initial time as King. Forfedre is now a far cry from a peaceful looking nation that Axel once grew up in. It's now a place of darkness and distortion. Forfedre has became a dystopia of corruption and Axel is still it's ruler. Over the Years Axel invaded and conquered different nations around the world, taking the fighting style of every warriors of the nations he dominated. Axel also changed his appearances by wearing a fiery overcoat and a mask that resemble the warrior face paint in Keiko's nation as a form of mockery to the Eastern Republic as well as the sword he wields. The six hundred years since that day Lady Keiko rejected Axel never left his mind and it was now time to make good to the promise that Axel made to Keiko. A month later Axel lead a full assault on Keiko's Home Land. He and his army slaughtered The Republic's Soldiers and Civilians alike, not allowing any soul left alive. While Defeating one of Lady Keiko's personal guards, The Empress Deity appeared herself looking at Axel with no expression. Axel turn around and said "Their you are!! Did you remember what I said to you that day!? All of you faithful subjects are dying like lambs to a slaughter all thanks to you!! And you are going to die along with them!!" Lady Keiko is still silent and emotionless. "Why don't you say anything to me!!! Do you hate me that much!? Is it because I'm a demon now!? That I'm not the Perfect being that you want to your chamber!! IS THAT WHY YOU REJECTED ME!!!" Lady Keiko said "I don't hate you. Not even now..." Axel says "Then why..." Lady Maya Matsui interrupted the two of them and say to Axel "Do you wonder why my mother didn't chose you Axel?" She then Quickly Spears Axel to the heart with her Naginata and said "You don't have the capacity to rule beside her." Axel said to Lady Maya "Do you think that spear to the heart will kill me? Their's nothing there for a long time now, and you just sealed you fate trying to stop me. I will end your life here." Lady Maya tells Axel "I'm not going to kill you..." Axel was surprised by that statement and she continue to explain, "You reminded me of someone who is very close to me. She fell into despair because I was to late to protect her. But you... You have the same aura that she did when she transform. I can use you to finally know how the both of you feel so no one else will suffer the same pain that you both feel, and this type of tragedy will never be bestowal upon another innocent soul ever again!" Maya's energy begins to leave out of her body and begins to overshadow Axel's body until they both engulfed in a giant sphere of light. Axel's mask breaks and he passes out. His last thoughts was "Keiko... All I ever wanted was to be loved by someone." Maya's thought after that was "I understand... I saw it in you mind when I hit you..." The sphere of light faded away and when Lady Keiko and Mako came to investigate what was left behind from the light that came across a naked body of whats appeared to be a human version of Lady Maya Matsui lying on the ground. Lady Keiko leans forward to the human Maya when lunches at Lady Keiko trying to reach her. The girl keeps calling Keiko's name before she look at her hand and notice something was wrong. The girl screams and cries before passing out. Lady Keiko realizes that this isn't the same Elder Daughter that she once knew and she must find a way to protect from any retaliation that may come from both Forfedre and The Eastern Republic nations. Lady Keiko contacts Princess Celestia and told her about what happen to her country and the situation with her daughter. Princess Celestia suggest that she should send Maya to Equestria so she can take care of her for now on. Lady Keiko agrees and send Maya and her sister Mako to Equestria so they can be safe until everything can return to normal. The Painful First Four Months in Equestria Lady Maya Doi and Mako Matsui has moved to Equestria in a nice Modern Apartment funded by their clan. Maya however was unresponsive since the day of the incident. Mako had to take care of Maya through out the first four months in Equestria. She had to feed her, bathe her, and even change her clothes, just the name a few. Sometimes, Maya screams and cries for a moment and Mako hold on to her until she stops and either becomes unresponsive or falls asleep. Despite Lady Mako herself being the Deity of Joy, her heart was fill with sadness as she couldn't do anything more to help her elder sister. Mako's joy seem to be all but lost at this point and she found herself crying at night. One day Lady Maya finally regain consciousness and see Mako looking as hopeless and depress as she is. This was the last straw for Maya and one night she got up and left her apartment to finally end her life. That night Lady Maya meet a little Pegasus named Fluttershy. Ever since that night Maya's started to finally enjoy her time in Equestria and her time with her sister Mako once again. Forwarding six years, Rarity gave birth to Maya's unicorn who processes the memories of the Deity of Passion. The now Equestrian Maya and her unicorn has a very unique relationship where it's more complicated then your usual Equestrian and pony counterparts. The unicorn Maya does genuinely see the Equestrian as her Father but often teases her about it, and about how she is know getting all the love and attention from all the lovely ladies in Equestria. When the Unicorn Maya turn into her anthro form, the blood lust (or regular lust, depends on the mood) flows within The Mayas. The nemesis between the two previous incarnation still lives within the two of them which leads them to spar against one another until either they both hurt themselves or the Unicorn Maya gets tired and revert back to her pony self. It took them both awhile for they finally accept one another and begins to act like each others counterpart... And then.... The Lunar Eclipse Saga happened! That was a very long one, but it's the a very important story nonetheless. After all this is my avatar we talking about. If you read all of this then thank you very much for reading. it took me a while to write but it was fun to make it. I may go on with more details about Axel along the way since we have Seven Test Render made of him. And Yes, I'm made a fundraiser for the upcoming Third book. If you want to support Act III of the Lunar Eclipse I'll put the Gofundme Page in the bottom. If you can't donate you can always share the link with anyone who is willing to watch it. I will reward anyone who donates to the page. Don't worry I got you back! Let's see music time... I gave Nightmare Moon Part two so Axel get's Part one! Mother F#$%er=Redeemer part 1 Moonbathing The Lunar Eclipse in Tapastic The Lunar Eclipse Act II Hit me up on Twitter: @AxelDoi and Tumblr: Ask the Equestrians for updates or you want to chat. I'm trying to more active there you know. ACT I ACT II Software used: Daz Studio 4.9 Pro, Face Den Artist Pro, Adobe Photoshop CC 2017, Iray, Poser Pro 2014 Help support the upcoming Book! Lunar Eclipse Part III Fundraiser!

#axel doi #3d art #Daz3D #Avartar #self image #MLP #MLP:FiM #My Little Pony #my little equestrian #friendship is magic #villain #villainous #demon #Demon King #despair #photoshop #grimdark

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fallen029 · 6 years

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The Nuances of Seances.4

Previous Chapter

It was the perfect evening for a late hour stroll through the woods. You know, if you were looking to be killed by an axe wielding murderer who would chop your body up and send it to your parents. Anything else you were looking to do, honestly, it just wasn't a good fit for. The blowing wind had a bite to it as it knocked felled leaves all about. The moon was out, but hidden behind dark clouds, obstructing the very little light it had to offer anyways. It was cold out and downright eerie.

And it frightened the heck out of poor Happy.

"So you wanna go out, all by yourself, into the woods at night, and absolutely can't have us follow you?" Lucy had questioned when he told Natsu and her that they were both on their own for the evening, as he had plans. "Happy?"

"Aye," he agreed, nodding his head, though the volume of his voice wasn't nearly as loud as it usually was. Especially when making such a declaration. "I'm gonna meet Lisanna and Bickslow."

"Are you following Lisanna and Bickslow? Little buddy?" Natsu tapped his nose. "'cause I'd be great help at that!"

"Please," Lucy begged, making a face at both of them. "Anything to get the two of you out of my apartment."

"No!" Happy definitely didn't want Natsu to tag along. While the feline would admit that he himself wasn't always the best at making sure a situation didn't fall off the rails, Natsu was a certain insurance that it would. And he and Natsu together? The whole thing would go to shit. The things they did together always went to shit. "I have to do this alone."

And he did. He sent out with only the pack tied around his neck for company, headed deep into the woods that surrounded Magnolia proper. While he was headed there though, across town, the others too were preparing for the hopefully eventful evening.

"I just can't do it, Mira," Elfman was grumbling slightly as they waked along the quiet street. "Eating dinner at that table was horrible."

"It was wonderful, I felt," his older sister gushed in reply. "Didn't you, dragon? Freed?"

"i for one," Evergreen intervened before either of the men could answer, "hate it."

"Well, it's a good thing I didn't ask for your opinion then." Mira glanced over her shoulder at the other woman. "Isn't it?"

As Ever's jaw hit the floor and she debated literally hitting the she-devil, Laxus and Freed only shared a look.

If it had been a long day, the night just might never come to an end.

Happy was already in position, hidden away in the clearing, when the five of them arrived. Ever was stewing as she knew going up against Mirajane, truly going up against her, would only lead to her own downfall, while Elfman kicked at the ground, unsure which of the domineering women in his life he should be siding with. Mirajane though seemed over it (if she was ever on it, that is), instead gushing to Laxus about just how excited she was.

"For, you know, whatever it is that we're doing," she finished with a grin as he only rolled his eyes. "I wonder who we're contacting. Ooh, I hope it's someone famous!"

"Why," Freed asked slowly, "would we summon someone famous? Of what use would that be?"

"I don't know," Mira said with a shrug. "Why do we do any of the things that we do?"

Which was a question worth pondering, honestly, as none of them truly had an answer.

Laxus though, who might to have known why the others did what they did, but certainly knew why he did (how many times does he have to cite fucking Mirajane as an answer before it becomes trite), was distracted by something else.

"Do you guys smell that?" he asked as Happy's heart sank, over in the bushes. "That scent. It smells like one of those damn cats."

"Oh, Laxus, hush." Mira patted him on the arm. "And come sit down. We should all practice our breathing techniques."

"Our what now?" Elfman asked.

"And on the ground? Are we sitting on the ground?" Evergreen regarded the grass and dirt with suspicion. "It's filthy!"

"Yes, Ever," Freed sighed as he took wished very little to do so. However, they'd come that far; to back out over something as silly as that would only make the thing even more aggravating. "That is how it works."

While that got him a glare, it only got Mirajane to clap her hands.

"This is just all so much fun already," she giggled. "Don't you guys think?"

No.

But then, the real excitement was only just beginning. In the distance, they all began to hear the sounds of the approaching seith and Lisanna, the latter's maniacal cackle more than carrying through the dense forest.

"You're gonna love it, Lissy," he was saying as he led the woman in question down the path, deeper and deeper into the forest. "Swear it."

"Swear it," came the drifting voices of five lost souls, forever bound (doomed?) to the control of their master. "Swear it."

Giggling along with him, she remarked, "You always give the best gifts, Bicks."

Err, well, he put some thought into them, at least.

But semantics were for squares.

"And," he was drawing out the word as they found themselves on the cusp of the clearing, "here we are!"

"You...invited the others," was what Lisanna said slowly as she found them there, Freed finally starting on kindling the fire, of which Bickslow had previously gathered sticks for a pile. "On our...date."

"Yep!" Bickslow nodded proudly. "That's exactly what I did."

"Don't you know yet, Lisanna?" Mirajane, who was seated on the ground, no quells about it at all. "We're having a séance!"

"We're having a what?"

"Do not," Ever griped as she still only stood, arms crossed over her chest, "complain, girlie. You're lucky we're even here."

"Judging by the look on her face," Freed mused as he hardly glanced up from the fire he was getting going, "I do not think that she's too excited about that either."

"I'm actually a bit disappointed in you, Lisanna," Elfman spoke up. He too had taken his seat on the ground, at the prompting of his older sister of course, and looked a bit goofy, honestly, to his younger one as he glared up and over at her. "Following a strange man into the forest late at night. What's wrong with you? That's how all horror stories start!"

"He's not strange, Elf. He's Bickslow."

"No, the man's right," Freed assured her. "I've known him half my life now and still, I find that he is very strange."

"What did you think you two would be doing out here anyways?" Ever asked, making a face. "Lisanna?"

"W-Well-"

"Get high and behave like the equivalences they are," Laxus griped much to the amusement of Mirajane who had to reach up and pinch at his cheek.

"Dragon," she giggled as the man sat stoically beside her, allowing this. "You talk like such an old man sometimes. It's so cute."

"I just want to get this over with," he complained. "I have things to do."

"What could you possibly have to do," Elfman complained with a frown, "so late at night?"

"Let me guess," Ever replied softly under her breath, "Mirajane?"

"I heard that and no," he grumbled as he glared off. "Actually, Gramps ain't so good at taking his pills these days. Especially his night ones. And since I've been stuck here with you clowns, I haven't had a chance to check to see what he's taken and hasn't. So after this, I gotta head over there."

That got everyone silent. Even Happy over in the bushes felt it and the dolls, who'd been merrily humming some sort off tune between them, did so softer.

Then, slowly, Bickslow remarked, "Jeez, boss, bring the room down much?"

Lisanna, eyes alight, asked, "Yeah, got any stories about brain tumors stored up?"

Instead of responding, Laxus only leaned down and said quite bluntly and audibly, "Mirajane, I don't like them. Either of them. Any of them. Can't we just go?"

"Oh, hush, dragon." His cheek got some more pinching. "You'll see why it's so important soon!"

"Just who, exactly, are we...seancing?" Lisanna, once more, looked to her boyfriend. "Bickslow?"

"Conjuring," he corrected.

"Is it really conjuring though?" Mira put a finger to her lips. "Or is manifesting?"

"The spirit manifests," Freed corrected. "We're summoning."

"Does that involve possession or not?" Evergreen was, once more, finding another reason to back out of their misadventure. "Because if so, spirit or whatever you are, wherever you are, I am not to be entered."

Bickslow, eyes alight, only replied, "Sorry about that then, Elfman."

"What does that even mean?" Elfman roared, recognizing teasing when it was thrown his way. "You're no man!"

"That would be relevant, maybe," Freed sighed, "in any other conversation."

"Who are we summoning, Bickslow?" Laxus impatience was only growing. And if Mirajane tugged at his cheek one more time, it might just bubble over into pure aggravation. "And what's it gotta do with Lisanna?"

"Oi, boss, I's getting to that."

"Then get to it."

"Right." Making a fist then, he rubbed his knuckles against his chest before turning to face his girlfriend. "Ahem. Lissy, as you know, I'm a man of many talents."

With her eyes staring straight into his, she nodded her head. "Many."

"I mean, I'm a great lover."

"The best."

"I'm super funny."

"Super duper."

"I make great burritos."

"The greatest."

"I-"

"Get," Laxus growled then as Mirajane didn't even try to corral him (she was growing weary of their antics as well), "to the point."

"Right, right, boss, sure." That time, the seith nodded. Then, with absolutely no build up or lead in, he said quite frankly, "I'm going to summon your dead parents from the grave."

For a moment, there was silence.

Then, a huffed, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

But it didn't come from the most likely of culprits. Laxus was busy staring down at Mirajane, trying to judge if she knew this was coming while the demon, who had not, only sat there silently, staring with wide eyes. Evergreen was shocked into silence (plus her love of all things traumatic, if it had to do with others, had more than kicked in). Her boyfriend was much the same, not sure just how to act in such a situation.

Rather, it was Freed who spoke, taking steps away from the fire and over towards his teammate, that deeply disappointed look he had at times like when Laxus blew them off or the seith or Evergreen neglected to do a certain task.

"Why would you even joke about something like that?" the rune mage was asking then. "That's terrible, Bickslow. You're terrible."

"It wasn't a joke, man!" Defensive now as his surprise that he'd thought so log and hard about was being turned into some sort of indictment on his character. "I'm gonna do it. I'mma summon their dead parents."

"Stop," Laxus finally sighed when it became clear his girlfriend did not know about this portion of things, "saying that, Bickslow."

"Why? It's what I'm going to do." Though usually one to cave to his idol, he did not when it came to matters of the heart. "I'm going to summon Mrs. and Mr. Strauss and they're gonna give Lissy the go ahead to marry me and you can all just suck it."

Now with an extra shock causing a hush to fall upon most the group, only Mirajane clapped her hands.

"Now, I knew the proposal part," she spilled to Laxus with a grin before sparing one at her still silent sister across the clearing. "I was so excited! What's more romantic than this?"

"Asking someone other than the woman for permission to do something with her?" Freed turned his eyes to the woman, but it wasn't disappointment he had in them, not even surprise; just exhaustion. "Mira? Do you know what year this is?"

"Mmmm, whatever year Laxus turns fifty?"

The slayer about fell over. "M-Mirajane!"

"Sorry, dragon." Again, she clapped her hands. "I'm just so giddy, I couldn't help myself! Ooh, Bickslow, do you really think you can do it though? Summon our parents? Oooh, now I'm even more excited."

"You are?" Ever raised her eyebrows. "Honestly?"

Nodding, she said, "Would you not be?"

"My parents aren't dead. That I know of."

And that hadn't meant to slip from Ever's mouth, but it had and it too made the already surpassing gauche situation nearly unbearable. After a moment, Bickslow spoke, but only to his girlfriend.

"Jeez, Ever, bring down the room more, why don't you?"

But that time, instead of grinning along, Lisanna only asked, "Can you really, Bickslow?"

"Bring the room down more? Sure. When I was a kid, I once watched another kid cut off a dog's tail and throw it back in the dog's face!"

"I'm done. I'm just don't." Laxus was starting to get up. "Lisanna, you're not allowed to marry or date him anymore. Come on. You can help me check on, Gramps."

"Bickslow," the young woman in question was saying as her sister tugged the slayer back down to the ground, "summon our parents, is what I meant. Can you seriously do that? Can you make it to where I can talk to my mom and dad?"

"Lisanna," Freed tried, but the seith spoke before he could finish.

"Of course." And there wasn't an ounce of wavering in his tone. "Would I say something so outlandish I I couldn't?"

Yes. Of course he would. He did constantly. A day didn't go by that he didn't say complete absurdity seemingly only for the purpose of annoying somebody else.

But would he be that cruel to his own girlfriend?

Yeah, Freed was leaning towards definitely, but what could you do?

"Then...if you guys are okay with it," Lisanna began as she looked around the clearing at her two siblings, "I'd like for you to do so."

"Yes! Oh gosh, yes! How great is this? Laxus never does anything like this for me," Mirajane gushed.

"Emotionally manipulate you by holding the deaths of your parents and my ability to connect with them from beyond the grave hostage?" Snorting, the man said, "Yeah, I've never done that."

"See?" Mira said with a shake of her head, as if disappointed.

"Elf?" Lisanna looked his way then. "Are you...okay with this?"

Evergreen was hoping no. In a twisted way, she was hoping no, but for him to say yes, because that would add even more fuel to the ever-burning fire that was their lives and would no doubt blow up soon enough.

This wasn't to say that a deep part of her wasn't concerned over the big oaf.

Because she was.

This was some heavy shit, assuming Bickslow could pull it off (and that was a big if).

But…

There was something wrong in Evergreen, there always had been, that just didn't care. Not when her own benefit (which was as little as a mere dramatic fight playing out before her) was on the line.

"If you really want him to, what kinda man would I be to deny you?" the man finally conceded.

Perhaps a smart one as, even as Bickslow solemnly received Lisanna's nod and replied with one of his own, Freed knew that something was up. He wasn't sure what, but he knew it had to be something.

And Happy, hidden away in the bushes, would make certain it was.

#Bixanna #Miraxus #Elfever #Freed Justine #Bickslow #Lisanna #Mirajane #Laxus #Elfman #Evergreen #lucy fairy tail #Fanfiction #4 of 5

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