#so like im super sad today

[empresskadia]

You know when you're in between things, like I wanna game but I wanna write buttt I wanna draw. Thats me today.

#kadia chatter #i woke up on the emotional side today #so like im super sad today #and i could just use some john cuddles #or spartan cuddles #because i know blue team would care 🥹 #linda would sit with me #kelly would try to make me laugh #fred and john would also sit with me #but also i like the idea of being laid on as a comfort blanket #and the spartans would be a great comfort blanket #anyways im rambling #ive been anxious as heck this week #why #i couldnt tell ya

[corpsoir]

love wins eventually for these pink fucks

amaro is @hottopicabbacchio's ^_^

#i love how they started out as sad bitter exes from the start but danny and i were like no actually lets make it worse and also better. #god i could go on and on and on about these guys but im not gonna be super annoying about them #theyre so important to me though >:] #thank you old romance films images post ive gone fucking insane today with it over these two. smile #jjba oc #jojo oc #calamari pavone #amaro avvoltoio #friends.oc #corps.oc #corps.art

[tsukana]

i think im really sad that im feeling bitter abt this bc like. despite the fact that ppl are saying oh yeah its purgatory its never fair. i have a bad taste in my mouth that for once it feels like its not bc of player action its partially to do with weird ruling by the admins on the event (re: the essentially. disregarding of the event points on elimination which i still kinda dont get why they couldnt just retally the points since they had the numbers?)

#tsu talks #qsmp crit #qsmp discourse #i mean yeah i was rooting for sneeg but also. i hate that he's blaming himself that if he hadnt spoken up theyd have lost anyway. bc it #wasnt his fault? #and not trying to hate on the admins at all or anything. but despite saying the wrng names #recalculating the scores and just Saying what the score makeup was wouldve solved everything without making streamers need to stream beyond #what they expected on a day that shouldve been primarily abt the egg wars event? #anwyyas shutting up now. this isnt meant to be a super neg or something post this is mostly just me reflecting on the way i feel abt today #and the way today went and the way the event went today. i still had a good time so far #and like i said. i feel sad that i feel this way bc i dont WANT to feel this way. btu like. what can i do abt that yknow. thats just how im #feeling. i really wanna enjoy the event but honestly now that sneegs out he was rly the only purg2 pov i was watching lmao. id watch #etoiles but i cant read translations while im listening at work </3

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

friendly reminder that self harm is lying to you

#the worst is when it promises you'll feel better and then you simply. do not. you feel worse and then you want to harm again bc surely that #will make you feel better right? THAT WOULD BE A NO. IT DOES NOT. #anyway today i went to spotlight cause i was sad cause i got the result for my 35% assignment i really struggled with. 32.5%. failure. #and at spotlight i made the foolish error of buying without knowing price. but like who makes a book a normal softcover crochet pattern boo #$55?! anyway it's a lovely book and am excited to try a few of teh patterns but the guilt is eating me alive #and also im super stressed about the assignment i have to turn in on thursday and haven't started #anyway i was literally four and a half hours away from being seven days clean #and i am just so sad right now #and i reopened one of the scars on my wrist too while on shift this morning so that's fun #not badly but it's just gonna mean it scars even more isn't it because of course #i was feeling incredibly awful for some reason i can't even remember and i kinda clawed up my arms. and no i don't count that as #breaking my streak bc it didn't cause much damage #i just. placement is so wonderful but life is so so hard #i don't know i want a hug and the assignment done and everything bad unmade #and the scars i have to look at every day on placement gone. #i want to talk to s but i haven't responded to her last message and i don't know how to respond but i need to respond to that #:(( #honestly actually i think i want to talk to aunty. friend's mum. in person. and get a hug. i want a hug. #im just. So Sad. and i want my brother and Ransom and this is not helpinga nd i don't know what would if anything

[kitticula]

healing from brain damage is definitely the worst injury ive ever had to heal from so far 😞 this shit is so difficult yall

#tiny bit of my long med history for context: #i have broken my collarbone #i have had my face mauled by a dog where i had to Literally Physically tear it off my face #it locked its jaw around my nose and upper lip #i got like 10 stitches and they had to super glue my nose back together #but uhhhhhh #i got a concussion as a kid that went untreated because our healthcare system is so underfunded and understaffed #and that turned into what the doctors call ''functional nausea and vomiting disorder'' #then on monday i got another concussion at work #and holy shit. #second-impact syndrome is a BITCH #im in so much pain if i use my brain at all #hey other dissociative people: you've dissociated from your body but have you ever had to dissociate from your brain? #or is this what being forcefully locked at the front and locked out of headspace feels like? #i think this might be worse though because i cant think at allllllllllllllllllllll #i get delirious if i try 😔 #this is so hard #i sobbed in the shower over it for like 30 minutes today lol #i had to sit down in the middle of my shower and it was so hard yall #im trying to hard not to spiral #being vulnerable and putting this on my main instead of hiding it on one of my many many sideblogs #(jsyk if youve read this far then youre allowed to ask me what my active sideblogs are. dms and asks are open) #(@queerlyneurotic is one of my vents and where i usually put sad shit. you get a freebie for reading this.)

[ialwaysknewyouwerepunk]

.

#these past two weeks have been so intense that ive just.. not spoken about it once i got home from work #blocked it all out #my beloved colleague whose desk is next to mine has cancer #breast and uterus. she needs two major surgeries #they just diagnosed her two weeks ago #so we've been trying to deal with that as colleagues and friends #because we love and miss her and i am so deeply sad as well #but i feel like i couldn't process that at all bc two days after the news of her diagnosis i was asked to take on half of her work #on top of my fulltime #which i agreed to do bc i like her tasks and i want to help her and i also know i can do it #but it does feel very off bc i know i don't earn enough money for this workload to be long term and it is def like this #for the coming four months at least #so i did tell my manager that i would like a raise and. that bitch told me to BUY MORE SECOND HAND SHIT. #i seriously thought i saw my life flash before my eyes #then the day after she asked one of my colleagues who's been with the firm for over 30 years whether she was looking for another job maybe? #which caused that colleague to instantly go home in tears and be home from basically a nervous breakdown the past 1.5 week #which is her full right and i support her with all my heart but bc my management sucks it meant that we had to also carry her tasks ofc #i felt soooo spread thin and super super angry actually but i didn't even realise how angry i was until last thursday my colleague w cancer #came by the office. and talked about all of it. and i suddenly realised how sad i was but then also how angry #but i was just blocking it all out trying to stay afloat #bc we told her about what the manager had said and she said “i hope that i get the chance to really tell her how it is someday.” #“because the stress she causes with people can actually kill you. just look at me.” #and the rest of the day i felt so ready to be done with everything actually #but seeing her anger made me see my own anger #and released me of my own pent up emotions bc i had actual leg pains this week and it was purely psychosomatic #i then managed to tell some friends yesterday about what was going on and their outrage spurred me on even more #so today i emailed hr. demanding a raise #doing this amount of work while constantly feeling like the house is on fire while also struggling financially seriously makes me suicidal #and i am not joking #so.. if nothing comes of that im leaving that job and not looking back

[yuukimiyas]

hello hello sweet friends in my phone!! ໒꒰ྀིㅅ´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა & a v happy weds to you!! <33 i hope may has been showing you sm love so far & that the magic continues throughout the month!! ໒꒰ྀི∩˃ ᵕ ˂∩꒱ྀི১ have the best day EVER!!

#ᕱ⑅ᕱ.* journals! #goooood mornie sweets!!! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و✧*｡ how are we doin?? #im still dealin w some health stuff which sucks :((( i just want it to be sorted out already!!! hopefully by next thurs it will be ᐡ• ·̫ •̥ᐡ #keepin my lil paws crossed!!! i have some other exciting/stressful news!! im lookin for a new place!! ⸜(*´ᗜ`*)⸝ #bc if i resign my lease here for another 2 yrs they raise my rent like $600 ໒꒰ྀི𖦹﹏𖦹꒱ྀི১ & that is TOO MUCH!!! #i love my apt sm so i’m a lil sad i gotta leave in sept :’< but im sure i’ll find a super great place!!! #sigh i wish my life was boring again so i could be on here every moment 𐔌՞⸝⸝ʚ̴̶̷̷ · ʚ̴̶̷̷⸝⸝ ՞𐦯 i’ve been so busy/overwhelmed lately !!! i HA #but im going to take today one step at a time & make a lil budget!! :3 wahoo!! i’ll try & see you guys later!! MWAH MWAH!!!

[aastarions]

i know ive been complaining so much but can i catch one break like just one break im begging im pleading

#c shut up #my throat is still shot today super achey and talking is difficult #im having some aches in my incisions #also!! ever since i got out of surgery i've had a tapping/popping noise in my chest and its not followed by any pain in my chest but it #could mean anything from just gas trapped there from surgery to a partially collapsed lung #and i know googling things is not always the best but i needed to know what this popping noise was #because it just didnt feel right #it only happens when i switch from like laying down to sitting up or sitting up to standing #idk but my mom is taking me to the drs for my throat today bc shes worried it would impact my surgery recovery #im just really sad :( #and oh even better the house inspection didnt go well meaning its basically 5050 on if we even get this house #that we've put the past 2 months and some money into #and as im typing this our mortgage lender whos turned into an asshole is down our throats like when u closing when u closing #im in agony #can something go right can one thing go right #im so tired

[yogurtlid10000]

collection of old unfinished link arts-except the tp link one, that’s new-THAT ARE SO FIRE TBH ‼️‼️🎉 how did I conjure this up last year what was I ON😕 yippe

I love how it’s a different facial structure every time. 😞

Tomatoes

LA la la La I’d like to draw Cyclonus next but also I Magnus cuz I missed his birthday ( secretly Magnus is my favorite transformers charcater )

#Jusssst kidding perceptor and brainstorm are forever my favorite but I feel like Magnus is under apprecaited #Fantastic shoulder man! #Anywaaaaaay er I did the whole yiga quest thing in totk (I’m so behind) and that’s why I felt like posting Zelda idk #Zelda #totk #legend of zelda #linkus #u burned your FUCKING ARM OFFF??? #if oot link chopped off his ears don’t u think he’d look like edward elric from his anime fullmetal alchemist brotherhood? #if ed put on some elf ears istg he could cosplay oot link #oot link #OOT LINK YIPPPEEEEEEEE #I love saying that out loud “oot” oot oot oot like ooooot #😨the bidding for the perceptor figure I wanted ended and now I can’t get it I’m so sad #eeebeebeee I can’t believe the fandom I’ve been in the longest is transformers (I realized that today) idk why I’m saying all of this in ta #Bro when I was like 5 or 6 I used to PLAY transformers with some neighborhood kids and and #And I was bumblebee I ROLE PLAYED BUMBLEBEE heeehee #It was super fun! Or at least what I remember… and there was this big book with all the transformers and I’d look at the #OK IM DONE good bye I hope no one read allat #JESUS CHRIsT i wrote too much in the tags #I hope the neighborhood kids I played with never find this.

[loserchildhotpants]

so many annoying takes today on all social media platforms what is in the water

#super sad when a mutual is like #‘freaks DNI’ #‘if you [engage in fiction in some specific way] fucking block me!!’ #‘if u ship [x] literally unfollow me 🤢’ #like okay i will #didn’t know u were a Thought Cop here to measure my morals by what media i consume rather than like my character and deeds #im Like 30 or 40 And do Not need this lol #new age fandom Puritanism is fucking exhausting #i have that old school fandom mindset too like i keep showing up to functions at the fandom ymca #and im making friends and sharing my homemade cookies and having a fine time #and then someone is loudly like ‘if u use ur imagination in the wrong way gtfo’ #it used to be so much easier to make friends in fandom now i get daily jumpscares by folks unthinkingly touting neo christo-fascist shit #melanie lives #I’ll just go offline today maybe #ugh

[be-good-to-bugs]

you would think considering how much it loves sleeping that my body would, yknow, sleep when i ask it to. or even just when it has barely slept in days and im trying so hard to sleep

#the bin #uugghhhh i woke up at 1pm today bc my stupid idiot body refused to go to sleep at a reasonable time even tho i was alreday so sleep #deprived. i have to work at 6:30 tomorrow morning :/ so i guess i wont be sleeping till then bc i still have to clean stuff and shower #maybe maybe maybe ill get a nap in but idk. bleh. i hope after i get home my stupid body will sleep. its gonna have to bc i work 7 hours the #next day so i cant do that too sleep deprived. i really really hope i dont have to :( hhhh #i wanted so bad to get high last night mosty bc my body has been refusing to sleep this past week but my sister n her boyfriend didnt come #over so i wasnt able to get more edibles :( or boxes for packing. hhh. i need to move so soon! i have no idea what day its even gonna be yet #i badeky have an idea of how much its gonna cost either. they finally gave me a gas cost estimate afeyr ive been asking for 3 weeks #hhh. well. whatever. i only have 4 more shifts. im kinda sad tbh. i really like working here. my coworkers are so nice #tomorrow is probs the last time ill ever see my fav coworker. shes so nice. shes so nice she used he/him for me and calls me orb #i just mentioned the name in passing once after i changed my pronouns on my nametag and she noticed and she remember! #and before she used it for me she stopped and asked if i was comfortable with it or if i wanted to keep it private. i have never EVER met #another cis person who would even think to ask that. most cis people dont understand why you would care. shes like. the nicest person ive #ever ever met. why did i have to find such a great place to work in minnesota? well. even if i am super tired tomorrow morning itll probably #be ok. butbi really would prefer not to be. #i dont know why i havent been able to sleep properly. bleh. i do liek what edibles do to me its a fun time but its kinda annoying that i #cant use them very casually for sleep or pain. they incapacitate me for 14 hours minimum. #well. at least no matter how stressed i am abt everything. i will definitely be elsewhere in 18 days max. should be less than that. #i will miss this job and these coworkers but i am relived that i wont have to go to work for awhile. esp with this tooth pain. #and im so excited to be able to draw again! im glad im moving a month before artfight bc itll give me time to get shit prepped #i wanted so bad to participate last year but i wasnt able to come evn close to finishing any attacks bc i was too tired from working

[marsbotz]

my new fursona btw. i actually picked a drsign finally. do you love him

#im actually drawing soemthing again finally guyyysssss. you see the wip -> on the right #IGNORE THE TABBY IMAGES LAWLLLLL i cba to redraw so i just recoloured the old design i made a little while agao #i hope wveryone is doing well …….. i havent but its ok im like cured again rn #ITS OK i got more meds today and i start therapy properly on mondayyyyyyy ^_^ #i miss you guyssss i miss u all. butttttttt i cant come back seriously like properly #guys i have so many exams coming up -_- BOREDDDDDD. BORED but its ok in like 3 weeks i will b done and then i can draw and game forever #oops i cant switch tags arounf on here but forgot to saw #i realised i just super love b&w animals soooo i did it for my fursoba. and it fits my well. dichotomy theme i have in my head #ong tho awesome news. the place im gonna b working next yr knows im trans cus i emailed abt my name chanfe in the system #andddd they r super cool abt it like they emailed my lecturer to dbl cgeck my name and probouns #guys this might be like the first time in my entired life i get called the right name AND pronouns. how epic #btw i ammmm kinda going back to it/he/they LAWL #cba to change my bio rn but know this. not thet it matteres #ive been watching lots of twitch streams recently and especially vinnyyyyyyy vinnayyy vinesus. vinny my dearly beloved #im so happy he streamed early today so i actually got to watch a whole stream LIVEEEE. notmally he streams in the middke if the night for m #gifgling kicking my feet. bijnnjeeyyyyyyyyyy #okat BYEEEEE. BYE #i will post the finishes wip when i get round to ittttt 💖💖💖💖💖 bye #I LITERALLY FORGOT HOW TO DRAW GUYS ITS SO SAD. ok nightttttr

[clownattack]

MY CLAYS FINALLY WENT INTO THE KILN ITS BEEN A MONTH!!!!!!

#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUHAAAAAAAA #LISTEM #GRABS YOU #i had to fire these fuckers at a pretty high temp bcs porcelain is hitemp ok #ok #they dont do hitemp firing super often #so i was trapped #in UNABLE TO MAKE JIRLY hell #but not for long #my time is now #i will cast silver and add so many loops #hopefully everything gets fired nicely and also #sad thing is #its not even all of my stuff lol #im still waiting for my hand and head and rib parts and some glazed bones to be fired at the exact same fucking temp #so #im hoping i wont have to wait another month ngl #killing #please i miss my hot transi gf so much #this friday im probably casting silver bits haha #fear #i dont like... handling crucibles filled with molten silver... #like this shits scary sorry i dont feel safe whenever someone has a crucible full of liquid metal #not today satan #uni

[pepprs]

discovered miah_pie on t*ktok (<- i don’t have one btw i just stumbled upon her bc someone i follow on ig talked abt her) and her videos make me want to cry so bad. 24 year old dependent moment

#purrs #i went to a clothing store today to try to get new work shoes and pants bc the one pair i have of each literally have holes in them and are #falling the fuck apart on my body and it was a HORRIBLE experience largely bc i think everybody in town was out shopping for back to school #so it was super crowded and there were lots of screaming kids and it was extremely stressful + my dad got into a mini car accident while i w #was in the store (he was / is completely fine thankfully but the car is not which is so awesome 😍😍😍😍😍) and i was just so stressed and #overstimulated but also like… nothing fits me bc im so short lol. but anyway it was so horrible i was on the verge of starting to cry in the #store and then i came home empty handed and my mom got super pissed at me for… needing to go to the store / being the reason we were out lol #and then finding miah pie and her videos are all about making trips to the store SO much fun and buying little treats and saying yessir and #OHHHHHH MYYYYY and just finding the joy in smth that can be so stressful and unpleasant… it makes me want to cry happy and sad tears at the #same time like i want that soooo bad and i can’t do it fully yet but i want it. need it. fuck my stupid baka life #anyways im gonna start saying the stuff she says just to make myself feel better even when im not at a store. yessir! OHHHHHH MYYYYYY. #acquired. don’t mind if i diddly dooooo! #also btw i am not a dependent except for the ways i am a dependent. hope that helps 🫶🏻 #the problem is really that i don’t have a car or a license and also that my mom throws a fit every time i need / want to get driving #practice bc it’s never a good time so. lol 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 me doing drivers ed this summer was a fucking joke i forget literally everything i #learned and have only been behind the wheel 3 times and none of them have actually counted bc im just developing basic motor skills #(literally). fmlllll im never getting out of here who am i kidding 🤪 #delete later

[steven-cartoons]

mutuals...my beloved mutuals....I see you in my activities liking and rbing my posts but I don't see any of y'all in my inbox or in my dms❗️❗️

if you were waiting for a sign to say hi this is it ❗️❗️❗️

I think y'all are all way cooler than me and I will not reach out first </3

#my fellow bitches w social anxiety are welcome to rb this but i triple dog dare you to actually reach out and talk to someone today!! #i made my first discord server recently and it's been genuinely wonderful getting to chat with so many new people #it's been making me realize how much i want to talk to the people ive been mutuals with for like years now!! #you guys all seem so nice! and i never reach out to any of you !! and thats so sad ! #im hyping myself up here if it wasnt obvious #anyways be my friend guys i promise im nice!! im just super cringe!!! guys!!!! #my post #ok to rb

[bunnihearted]

🐇🩹🚪

#i hate myself real bad today.... like it's this constant gnawing feeling in my stomach nd chest #i am such a fucking burden. i am deadweight weighing everyone around me down. im such a fkn pathetic failure #our living situation is rlly bad nd unhealthy nd toxic. im the only one who can disconnect nd shove it all down nd wanna pretend like nothin #but my sister nd my mom are going insane like they cannot stand it anymore. nd they're also getting super depressed so im worried #my mom's been trying to apply for appartments bc she's been on waiting lists for several years so she can actually maybe get one #so they were thinking that my mom nd my sister can move nd me nd my sister can live here #she even found an apartment close by that she would actually get!! so they could move!! #however...... you're not allowed to put more ppl on this contract so if my mom moves me nd my sister can stay here :/// so she cant move.... #cant** stay here #she cant move at all unless my sister nd i have our own places... #my sister has a job nd is an actual responsible adult. so she wont be long until she fixes that #but me???? im 25yrs old... never had a job. cant even graduate highschool even if i try. i have no fkn idea how to survive on my own!!!!! #im just a fkn burden on my mom. i keep her down. i chain her down nd keep her feom being free #im such an awful daughter. im such a bad person. im so worthless. i hate myself for hurting her #i hate seeing her so sad nd depressed bc she wants to get out of this situation so bad #and *im* the one keeping her here. im the reason she cant feel better. bc im a pathetic fkn 25yr old who lives off of her mom like a parasit #ooof i ... i hate myself more deeply than i ever have. how can i do this to my own mom???? why am i so useless???? #idk what to do. idk how to move out!! where to?? how do u get a place to live??!? #atp i'd even take living with someone else. like renting a room or smth. just to free my mom of the curse that is me #but idk how to find anything like that bc im completely and utterly incapable nd useless #i feel so bad for my mom.... i know she doesnt want this but it makes me wanna kms even more #if im dead i cant weigh her down i cant ruin her life!!!! if im dead she'll be free of me. im nothing but a parasite she deserves to be free