#the door unlocked • [ asks ]

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

#spilled ink #writeblr #personal #please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it #i really try not to write so specifically about it #bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child #i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years #i might delete this. feels big. #the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum #and if u say ur autistic #inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms #please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do #and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort. #but it still feels like... #when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing. #they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly? #and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find #the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go) #and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW." #''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.'' #and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic #someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.

[rebouks]

Previous // Next

Byrd: Teach us! Juniper: Okay! First, you’ve gotta put your hands above your head. Wren: Nuh. Juniper: This part’s easy. Byrd: Like this?! Juniper: Just like that-.. keep them there and bring your foot up against your leg, like this! [Byrd giggled, wobbling precariously as he mimicked his cousin] Juniper: It takes a lot of practice-.. c’mon, Wren! [Wren scowled, making a break for it; the only thing worse than dancing was being told what to do] … Having given up trying to reply to Alex’s latest letter, Robin stared listlessly at the star shaped stickers on his ceiling. He’d poured his heart out about how nothing ever went right, how he never fit in anywhere, how he was having a tough time at school-.. that he got in a fight, that he kept imagining what it’d be like if his parents died, particularly his father; he’d briefly considered asking what’d happened to her mother too but he’d thought better of the whole thing and viciously crumpled his pathetic attempt into a ball instead. Maybe he ought to burn it in the sink so no one else would read it by accident. He felt bad that he hadn’t replied yet but he’d been in such a foul mood recently that he couldn’t think of anything remotely interesting or fun to talk about, and the last thing he wanted to do was bum her out. He rolled onto his side as Wren stomped toward his door; it rattled familiarly as her little fingernails fiddled with the lock. Robin knew it was her because he could sense her current disdain, and she was the only one of his siblings who’d learnt how to do it-.. plus, if it were either of his parents, they would’ve knocked.

Wren: Juni’s tryna make me dance! Robin: She’s not gonna make you do anything. [Wren grabbed Robin and shook him with urgency, yanking at his hair with desperation] Wren: I’m gonna hide in here, okay?! [Robin sighed; reasoning with a six-year-old, especially Wren, was rather pointless] Robin: Sure. Wren: Wait-.. where’re you going?! Robin: Does it matter? You’re safe in here. Wren: Robinnnnn. Robin: Get off me! Wren: I wanna play! Robin: So, play-.. just don’t delete all my saves again. Wren: You do it! I wanna watch. Robin: I don’t really wan-… Wren: Pleeeeeeease? … Robin: I can’t play if you’re gonna squish me-.. get off. Wren: Uuuugh.. I can’t, I’m stuck. Robin: Move! Wren: [gasps] What is that-.. kill it! Robin: I don’t have anything to ki-… Wren: KILL IT!

#ts4 #sims 4 #simblr #ts4 story #sims story #forever in between #fib #robin finch #wren finch #byrd finch #juniper finch #skdjsk wren.. KILL IT #no questions asked #😂 #reminds me of making my dad play tomb raider for me whilst i watched cos i was too scared to play it myself lmao #poor robin just wanted to wallow in peace tho #😭 #damn that “safe” lock that oskie insisted on pfffft #always wondered what the point in those thumb turn ones was cos u can technically unlock em from outside if u can fit smth in the crack #but ig it makes sense on inside doors just in case smth happens 🤷‍♀️ #neway..

[hereforthe911buds]

having religious trauma isn't something only queer people experience. cis/het people can have religious trauma; in real life a couple cis/het friends of mine have acknowledged their own.

But addressing religious trauma is such a common occurrence for queer people that Eddie starting to acknowledge it at the same time as Buck explores his own sexuality has a lot of potential regarding future storylines. watch this space.

#i say this as a former catholic. addressing religious trauma can unlock a lot of doors. #to the extent he asks his girlfriend not to move-in with him #i dont get how marisol wouldnt be more mad about eddie resending his move-in invite. id personally be mad if it was me #911 abc #buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911 marisol #religious trauma

[housewifebuck]

when do you think buddie exchanged keys? must have been before the tsunami. in my mind it was after the truck bombing because eddie drove buck to appointments or didn't want him to have to get up to answer the door when he visited

UR MIND…….yes it was 100% so eddie could come check on him and check his pulse while he slept every 5 minutes during his recovery

#after the like. second time eddie came over and buck had to haul his ass over to the door to unlock it #eddie was like what if you just gave me a key ha ha unless #and buck was like *pulling an already cut spare key out of his pocket* I thought you’d never ask #asks #anonymous #office hours

[disteal]

see i also followed you for overwatch reasons, and then, years later, was extremely delighted when you got into transformers like half a year after i did.

I learned a lot of lessons in OW fandom about pacing myself and doing things bc they’re fun instead of for attention, and I’ve had a rly great time in TF because of it :,) glad you’ve been w me through all of it 👍

#ask #tf is great i met 2 of my lovely partners drawing the combaticons smorking up #met swin and mower and art there #Art has always been a social thing for me so fandoms important #but i can get way too overinvested if i’m not careful #the doors unlocked and i come and go as i please #learned my lesson #tumblr also nicer to be on than it was in 2016 lol

[bridges-to-ashes]

Yes I can! Usually

- Koshek

You lot eat biscuits and pebbles.

#ember in the ashes #the door unlocked • [ asks ] #k05h3k

[kayvsworld]

i always forget i have Healthcare System Anxiety until i have to interact with The Healthcare System and immediately just start screaming internally for days

#my mom obliterated her bones and the pre-surgery surgery post-surgery experience. the ER situation. moving 2 the woods #this is a vent post i forget my complaining tag #waited 30 mins for an ambulance & when we called back they were like ''yeah it hasnt been assigned to anyone & might be hours'' #so i drove her to the ER with a migraine & ran over some pylons (cool). #stuck in the ER for 9 hours. took 4 hours for anyone to give her any kind of pain management. i caught covid #was supposed to get a call when she was out of her 2 hrs max surgery. was told i could call if i hadn't heard anything #5 hours later i called and was transferred 6 times - told she had been discharged - told she had never been registered at that hospital - #yelled at by a nurse for asking for patient information - eventually got the right department and was told oh yeah sorry she's in recovery #was supposed to find out if she could come home or not in 30 mins. 3 hours later theyre like OK come get her #i show up and the doors to that wing are. locked? and no one's there to unlock them? #apparently i was supposed to pick up the wall phone? and call a code they hadn't given me? spent 30 mins getting help from other department #to GET THEM TO OPEN THE DOORS. FREE HER RELEASE HER #finally i get in and she's OK SHES FINE except morphine doesn't work on her so that's. fine. bodies are good to have #we have reached shrimp colours levels of anxiety i am a walking talking stress migraine but she's doing ok. but holy fuck #kayvswords #also like she's black and all of her nurses and doctors have been white so feeling normal about all of it all around

[grootficguy]

my friends and i have this in-joke that trickster fae exist & they’re just normal ass people doing stuff to deliberately confuse us for their amusement. having said that, PLEASE tell me your experiences with the trickster fae.

#I asked a guy outside my lecture hall if he was going inside bc I didn’t have a student pass to unlock the door yet #he said ‘yes and no. yes I will eventually go in but no I am not going in now but eventually that no will transform into a yes.’ #he then pulled out a vape and a Batman comic

[bastardbvby]

guys. i’ve reached a new level of crazy from my client’s mom that always sleeps in like guys i’m sitting here jaw to the floor in awe right now at this current situation

#she texted me this morning like oh we barely got sleep so i’m just gonna leave my front door unlocked and you can come in and wake us #which is already such a WEIRD situation. BUT THEN. i get here and awkwardly wave from her bedroom door and go to the living room. #AND SHE TEXTS ME. TEXTS. to say they are actually going TO GO BACK TO SLEEP. AND SHE JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I COULD GET IN????? #LIKE AT THAT POINT JUST ASK TO MEET LATER OR CANCEL/!????? WHY AM I IN HER HOUSE WHILE SHE IS SLEEEPINGGGGG

[respectthepetty]

Goodnight, Sir!

Goodnight to this Win who realizes he can't abandon Team in episode seven after questioning his feelings in episode six, so he shows up to hold a dejected Team, and apologizes to Team for leaving him in a moment of doubt.

And I KNOW it's you coming through tomorrow because you are both wearing the same outfits from the end of episode six with y'alls reds and blues.

Goodnight to this Win, and this Win only.

I'll see your raising-the-bar-for-boys-in-a-BL ass tomorrow.

#between us #teamwin #he asks for consent #he leaves the door unlocked #he apologizes #he buys snacks #he watches horror films even though he is afraid #Daddy is coming home tomorrow

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#love that when ur stressed and having a bad time it makes ur menstrual pain worse so you feel even more awful #like. yes. id love to get things done but unfortunately i need to go home immediately at 2pm bc i feel physically ill. vibes wretched. #im considering sleep here at 6pm but 2 b fair i think i only slept 4hrs last night. woof. tomorrow is gonna b interesting #i think the allergic reacting is abt over now tho. like im not really itchy anymore. the rash is still visible but i think its just dry now #bc of the cold. so was i ever reacting to the tatto0? or was it all the medication? im so interesting in what happened #would i not have had a reaction if i hadn't got a bunch of holes poked in my skin? or was it just a coincidence #that the rash started on that arm? ugh. so frustrating. and i think the psychiatrist forgot to actually book my appointment from when we #last talked so idk. maybe if i watch t4skmaster over and over it will heal my soul #ay. its all very frustrating. and i still dont have fucking autoclave access. fuck off. just give me the fucking key code #i just wanna pour plates 🫗 lol that actually looks a lot like pouring solid media. i dont wanna have to steal someone else's card to open #the door. who even locks up an autoclave??? they didnt at my old school and u could wheel a body into that thing. im pretty sure it was #bigger than this one. also there's another unlocked on on campus. why?! i ask ppl and fucking no one knows. that's just how it is #ugh. i should go to sleep. my tummy hurt #unrelated

[coiled-dragon]

Raspberry + lilac + mulberry :)

Raspberry - Waiting for you to post dick on main Lilac - Trying to give you a pawjob ASAP Mulberry - Trying to find out how to kidnap you

🥴 oh damn I totally hope you DONT kidnap me giggles and twirls my hair,,,,

#if I had a dick or any confidence in my body maybe I would post dick on main #ask game #ask #biblicallyaccurateptarmigan #leaves my door unlocked....

[umbralhorrors]

#famous last words (again) #i just remembered when theyre asking to get into the school at night and he says he leaves the door unlocked when he smokes lmao #shuuenpro #youth crime

[jojameswinter]

Pope saying “that door opens bro” is just a genius little comment in episode 9 when jj jumps into the twinkle to go save his girl. And then another run in with kies parents makes him realise he’s all that she needs cos her parents are a piece of shit. Then JJ opens the damn door in kitty hawk and finally kisses kie like please I just can’t- A FAN FIC RIGHT THERE. 😭😭

OH MY GOD the things that were so spot on to fic this season were JUST-

I LOVE THE PATES FOR SO MANY THINGS that I can gloss over some of the other things.

No, but seriously, they have listened to the fans, and I think did their best to deliver while still preserving the story they wanted to tell. It's just beautiful to see! I ADORE the details they put in and the parallels they draw!

#JJ MAYBANK UNLOCKING THAT DOOR Y'ALL #WITH CARE #LIKE HE TOOK HIS TIME TO DO IT RIGHT #IT WAS IMPORTANT #LORD HELP ME #jj maybank #jiara #ask #my asks #lovely anon #diana answers #obx #obx3 #the pates

[bridges-to-ashes]

Hah, face squish! Henry does that, too :P

They tilt their head a little more and carefully squish Edwin's cheeks.

"I see why."

#the door unlocked • [ asks ] #stories untold • [ event: the prodigies ]

[ooogai]

HELP VIZERXA TRAPPED ME IN THE CAT ROOM

..i dont have any problems with cats, definitely! I just uhm- uh- uhmm- I-I don't like small rooms! yeah that! ... help

(-Sidera, @the-fox-and-the-shadow. this is related to the bsd family dinner shshsjsjs)

oh no, here i’ll let you out.

#unlocking the door for you #aaand you’re out! #bungou stray dogs #asks #bsd mori #bsd rp #bungo stray dogs #bsd rp blog #bsd roleplay #bsd family dinner