#the fact it survived this long was already a miracle

[felicitypdf]

my laptop went to old tech heaven today and i went to get a new one (goodbye savings) so like. wish me luck in configuring it and getting all my DAW licenses transferred😐 also dealing with apple ids my beloathed😑

#the fact it survived this long was already a miracle #since i really should have replaced it 2 yrs ago but had no money #having a very ‘my father has never given me anything’ sally draper moment today #but choosing to not be so angry and just appreciate my mom even more

[colonelarr0w]

Geto, Gojo, and Choso with an s/o going out for a girls night with her friends but her dress is VERRRRY short. :))

A/N : STOP BECAUSE I WAS KICKING MY FEET AND TWIRLING MY HAIR THE ENTIRE TIME THAT I WAS WRITING THIS.

Includes - Suguru Geto, Satoru Gojo, Choso Kamo

Warning(s) - suggestive content, foul language, Gojo is a WHORE (what else is new honestly)

! PIECE BEGINS UNDERNEATH THE CUT !

“Fuck me!” 

Suguru’s ears perk at the sound of your frustrated voice, head tilting curiously as he glances up from his phone. He stands from his position on the couch, slowly entering your shared bedroom and watching as you pull down the back of your dress.  

Judging by your irritated tone and stiffened body language, it wasn’t the first or the second time that you had tugged your dress down.  

“Everything okay in here baby?” Suguru inquires from the door, forcing his eyes to meet your own as opposed to wandering down. The last thing that he wanted was to be on the receiving end of your wrath — the last time that had happened, he had been placed on a week long sex ban.  

To say he barely survived that would be the understatement of the century.  

“Just this stupid dress,” you bite out angrily, slapping your hands against your thighs in defeat. You had accidentally ordered the dress a size too small, but it hadn’t looked that short when you laid it out over your bed.  

But now that you were wearing it, it continued to ride up with every single one of your movements, nearly exposing your entire backside.  

The fact that you hadn’t ripped the dress to shreds with your bare hands was a miracle in it of itself.  

Suguru finally allows his eyes to rake up and down your figure, admiring the way that the dress hugs your curves while still remaining elegant. The straps are loose over your shoulders, intentionally of course and the dress’ corset only makes you look that much better.  

But you don’t see it that way, instead, you see the dress as an inconvenience that is only making you more and more late for your girls’ night with Shoko and Utahime.  

In the reflection of the mirror, you can see Suguru watching you hungrily, a look that goes directly to your core. You can feel your face warming underneath his gaze, and you know that silently, he’s trying to make you even more late than you already were.  

“Don’t look at me like that,” you whine, turning to look at Suguru. He crosses his arms, still leaning against the doorframe and smirking at you. He doesn’t fail to notice the way your thighs rub against one another, no doubt trying to provide yourself with the tiniest bit of friction.  

“Oh? And why’s that?” he teases you, raising an eyebrow. You fight back the urge to roll your eyes, knowing the action would only dig you into a deeper hole.  

“You’re going to make me late,” you point out, turning back to the full-body mirror. You grab the bottoms of your dress again, tugging downward sharply and hoping that it would stay. But of course, the moment that you straighten your back, the dress rides up.  

This time however, Suguru doesn’t bite his tongue.  

“I’m not going to make you late, but that dress sure will,” Suguru steps forward, closing the distance between the two of you. His arms wrap loosely around your waist, tugging your back against his chest whilst his chin hooks over your shoulder.  

You let out a sigh, body relaxing against Suguru’s while one of his hands begins to slowly drift lower, sending a delicious shiver down your spine. “Suguru-“ 

“Hmm?” he hums, raising an eyebrow at you. Your teeth sink into your bottom lip, biting back the desperate whimper that claws at the base of your throat. He smiles at the look on your face, keeping his fingers right against the inside of your thigh.  

“I’m definitely going to be late now,” you sigh, leaning your head back so that it hits against Suguru’s shoulder. He grins in victory, then hooking his arms beneath you and swiftly lifting you from the ground.  

“That you are,” he agrees, all the while you giggle at your boyfriend’s antics.  

“Babe, Shoko texted you again. Do you want me to answer for you—?” Satoru cuts himself off as he enters your bedroom, standing slack-jawed in the doorframe as you continue to get ready, having not heard your boyfriend enter.  

You smooth your hands over your dress, turning your body in a circle to admire yourself in your room’s full-body mirror. An approving smile curls the corner of your lips upward. You had put so much time and effort into your hair, makeup, and outfit — to have it pay off was one of the most rewarding feelings.  

“Satoru? Everything okay?” you ask suddenly, having finally noticed your snowy-haired boyfriend standing in the doorframe of your bedroom. His jaw is still practically on the floor, arms hanging limply at his sides as he simply stares at you — it’s almost unsettling, really.  

He swallows the lump in his throat, suddenly aware of how tight his pants feel. And as badly as he wants to pounce on you, he knew that you would protest under the reason that Shoko would have your head if you were late to another girl’s night.  

“Yeah! Yeah, everything’s good,” he nods quickly, clearing his throat and doing his best to play off the way that he had been ogling at you.  

Curiously, you raise an eyebrow at him, but you say nothing in response. You turn back to the mirror, lifting your hands to your hair and smoothing it out, making sure that no strand was out of place.  

Satoru swallows again, glancing down at your phone in his hand before tossing it on the bed, then following it and laying on his stomach on the bed. Though laying on his stomach was uncomfortable, he wouldn’t dare admit that simply looking at you had gotten him hard.  

“Are you sure that everything is okay Satoru?” you inquire from your place in the front of the mirror, not failing to notice how he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you — not that that was an uncommon occurrence anyway.  

Shaking his head and forcing his gaze up to meet your own, Satoru nods quickly — almost too quickly to even be considered human.  

You hum, already feeling a smirk curl the corner of your lips upward as you turn to face him, being sure to sway your hips as you walk over to your bed.  

You reach your hands down, cupping the sides of Satoru’s face and guiding his gaze to meet yours, an action that he follows without an ounce of hesitation.  

“You really are a terrible liar,” you murmur, taking note of your boyfriend’s half-lidded eyes and the small purse of his lips. You lean down, slotting your lips against his own and smiling against him at the moan that he releases into your mouth.  

He leans further into you, pushing himself up onto his knees and wrapping his arms around your waist, tugging you against him.  

You pull back from him to catch your breath, not failing to notice the small whine that your action pulls from the back of Satoru’s throat.  

“I can’t be late again,” you point out, finding yourself smiling as Satoru’s lust-blown eyes flicker about your expression, deflating when he realizes that you’re being serious.  

“Please? It won’t be that late,” Satoru whispers, tucking his face into the crook of your neck and placing sloppy kisses against the skin there. He smirks against you at the shiver that runs up your spine. 

You sigh, disconnecting Satoru from your neck and placing your hands against his cheeks again. He tilts his head at you, feigning innocence as you playfully glare down your nose at him.  

“Fine,” you relent, craning your neck and pressing your lips to Satoru, allowing him to tug you onto your bed.  

You ended up being two hours late to girl’s night — much to the displeasure of Shoko. 

“Choso, honey, could you come in here for a second?” you call sweetly from your bedroom, smoothing your hands over the front of your dress. You find yourself smiling at the sound of hurried footsteps growing louder, and in a matter of seconds, Choso is standing in the doorframe of your bedroom.  

He pauses at the sight in front of him. You’re standing in front of the mirror propped up against one of the bedroom walls, hair done up with a face of makeup on. You’re wearing a dress that Choso hadn’t seen before; a skintight black dress that rides up just a touch too high for his liking — but he would never tell you not to wear it.  

You turn to Choso, smiling and placing your hands on your hips — completely oblivious to the effect that you were currently having on him.  

“What do you think?” you ask him, leaning your weight to the side. Your dress follows your movement, the right side riding up to expose the skin of your thigh. Choso’s eyes flicker to the newly exposed skin, but they just as quickly return to your eyes, not wanting you to think he was ogling you.  

He swallows past the lump in his throat, while also doing his best to ignore the growing strain in his pants. He would just have to restrain himself, you had to leave in twenty minutes after all. The last thing that he wanted was to be the cause of your lateness — though he didn’t know how long he would be able to hold out once you were gone. 

“You look gorgeous,” Choso responds quickly, realizing that he had accidentally found himself caught in his own thoughts. You smile at his praise, crossing the room and lifting your arms to wrap them over his neck, nails lightly tracing the nape of his neck.  

He shivers against your fingers, biting back a moan that climbs up his throat. You smile mischievously, flashing him one of those looks — the one where he knows that you wouldn’t exactly mind being late for girl’s night.  

Choso quickly leans down, roughly pressing his lips to yours as he tugs your chest flush against his own, hands gripping at your waist while your hands tangle in his hair, tugging lightly on the strands. You receive a cracked moan into your mouth following your action — one that has you smirking against Choso’s lips.  

He steps towards your bed, lightly dragging you with him until the backs of your legs hit against the bed’s edge. Only then does he help you, hooking his hands underneath the plump of your ass and lifting you up, never once breaking the kiss.  

You pull back to inhale greedily, biting your lips together as Choso’s hands wander over the fabric of your dress, fingertips just barely grazing your skin in a way that has you shivering.  

“Mine,” he growls against you, bending his head down to press featherlight kisses against your neck, sucking at your pulse point and feeling himself smirk at your back arching in response. Your body pushes itself further into Choso’s arms — a feeling that he would never get used to but wholeheartedly appreciated.  

He pulls his lips back from your neck — that earns him a disappointed moan. Choso’s eyes flicker to meet yours, pants straining at the half-lidded look that you give him, pupils lust-blown and chest rising and falling in panted breaths.  

With you sitting on the bed and Choso standing in front of you, it grants him easy access to what he wants most. He leans forward to peck your lips again, once again feeling his pants strain at the way your mouth chases his when he pulls back from you.  

He lowers himself to his knees in front of you, sending you one last glance before his fingers push up your dress. You let out a small sigh, glancing down at Choso. 

At this point, you didn’t even mind the fact that you were forty-five minutes late. 

#colonelarr0w #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk fanfiction #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen fanfiction #suguru geto x reader #geto x reader #geto smut #suguru geto smut #suguru geto x reader smut #geto x reader smut #satoru gojo x reader #satoru gojo x reader smut #gojo x reader #gojo x reader smut #choso kamo x reader #choso kamo smut #choso kamo x reader smut #satoru gojo #suguru geto #choso kamo

[ailithnight]

So! Giving my reblogs to this amazing art by @providencehq their own post so I can keep adding on to this fic at my own leisure.

Please don't ask to be tagged. I'm relegated to mobile and simply cannot keep up with a taglist. All additions will be going in the reblogs on this post, though. So feel free to come back here periodically to see if I've added more.

I'm currently up to 3 chunks with 1 more in planning.

So, without further ado:

Caught and Content

Daniel James Fenton had died at 14.

And every day since then he has counted as a blessing. Especially the good ones, but even the bad ones. The terrible ones. The days so horrid that Danny wouldn’t wish them on the worst beings in the universe. Danny treasured them still. Because every breath, every too slow heart beat, even the ones that pulsed with terror and exhaustion and agony, every one was a miracle. A moment of life that Daniel James Fenton wasn’t meant to have any more.

Borrowed time.

That’s what it was.

Danny had been living on borrowed time since he was 14. And he had long since made peace with the fact that his borrowed time would some day run out.

He’s 20 now. 6 whole years he wasn’t meant to live but did anyway.

A few more months and Danny would be 21, old enough to buy his first alcoholic drink. But even if he lived that long now, he wouldn’t get the chance. The GIW would ensure that. Tuck had celebrated his 21st a couple months ago, and Sam a few months before him. Danny would never get to celebrate his with them.

But that was okay. As said, Danny had long since made peace with the uncertain nature of his borrowed time. He didn’t need to go out to a bar with his friends and celebrate that he had survived 21 whole years. It would have been a lie anyway.

Daniel James Fenton had died when he was 14.

He was in the Watchtower now. Power suppression cuffs and collar making his already battered body feel even more weak and achy. Batman was staring at him. Superman and Wonder Woman seemed to be telling him things. Or asking. Interrogating. Danny paid them no mind. No answer he’d given them before seemed to satisfy. And he already knew what would come next.

These were government sanctioned heros. They were bound to the law. And the law said Danny must be turned over to the GIW. And since Danny had already escaped them and his parents once, he doubted they’d be keen to lock him up again. Research be damned, Phantom was too dangerous to be left alive. Or whatever facsimile of alive Danny existed in right now. Daniel James Fenton had died when he was 14.

So Danny ignored the government sanctioned superheros. He didn’t let his mind wander to tomorrows he’d never have. He had made peace with his death. So now he took every moment left of his breathing beating blessing to turn his gaze out the large Watchtower window.

Nothing else mattered as Danny beheld, breathed in, drowned in the last he’d ever see of the infinite beauty of the cosmos. He let himself relax, smile, and relish in the miracle of being here, of being allowed to see it one last time. And up so close, too.

And when the heros grew tired of Danny’s distraction. When they led him to a new room without any windows to peer out of. Danny stayed relaxed. Stayed smiling. He closed his eyes and waited for his borrowed time to run out. Even as Batman stared and Superman and Wonder Woman interrogated and the power suppression devices drained him of excess energy and he’s pretty sure the GIW were on their way to arrange his execution; he was contented.

Danny was not afraid. He was happy. At peace. Why would he be scared? After all, Daniel James Fenton had died at 14. Every moment since has been a blessing he has been grateful to have.

Because

Daniel James Fenton had died at 14.

#DP x DC #my writing #Caught and Content

[puffleyia]

changing room shenanigans

Cedric Diggory x fem!hufflepuff!reader (1.8k words) take this blurb. i haven’t written in awhile, too. Especially smut. but God forbid I starve, because I'm surviving off crumbs at this point. So-- i'm making my own food! :3 the fic is posted here, but you can also show some support on ao3. <33 https://archiveofourown.org/works/55057882

Warnings: smut, bjs

Summary: Eagerly, you watch Cedric during his quidditch practice, and even more so to finish. Getting a little impatient, you decide to follow him to the quidditch locker rooms. 

or

Soft dom Cedric tries out being a hard(ish) dom.

–

You yawned as you stretched your stiff arms to get some movement in after a long night’s sleep, and your eyes still quite droopy. Eventually, you got yourself up and groggily got dressed in your uniform. As much as you’d like to stay in on such a fine Saturday morning, you didn’t wake up at the crack of dawn for nothing. Of course, being the supportive girlfriend you are, you promised Cedric you’d watch him during practice this weekend. You wouldn’t miss it for the world. Heading out of your dormitory, you decide to hang around in the common room. Cozying yourself up on one of the couches, you wait for Cedric. You see some of his teammates leaving for practice already, greeting you as they pass by. After a few minutes, you finally spot him already dressed up in his quidditch attire, broomstick in one hand and offering his other to yours. You gladly take it. “G’morning, love,” he says in a low tone, almost whispering. He yawns as he talks to you, pressing a soft kiss to your temple. “Morning,” you mumble in response. 

“Sorry you had to get up so early.” He said sincerely.

“S’fine, really,” you assure him.

You two started to make your way to the quidditch pitch. The journey was mostly silent, though being interrupted with an occasional yawn. It wasn’t an awkward kind of quiet, though– it was a comfortable kind, something you could bask in.

Words didn’t need to be said right now to express any emotion. Sometimes it was silence that spoke the loudest.

Upon arriving, you rush up to get on one of the tall, empty stands. The team quickly gets to work, wasting no time in practicing.

Time passed by slowly, but it wasn’t necessarily boring. Though you wouldn’t admit the fact that you liked seeing your boyfriend progressively get all sweaty and dirtied up from it a bit too much.

As much as you liked watching practice, more specifically Cedric, you would like it even more to end. 

After what felt like a while, or long enough, it finally came to an awaited end. It must’ve roughly eleven o’clock by then.

You hurriedly get downstairs and meet him on the quidditch pitch, watching him as he slowly descends then dismounting his broom and as his teammates do the same. Whilst the others head straight for the locker rooms, he runs up to you and gives a warm smile.

“Hey.. I’m a mess, aren’t I?” He chuckles, seemingly amused at himself. He keeps a distance yet still remaining close enough, not wanting you to get dirty. “I don’t mind, really,” you say as you peck his cheek. “You look good. You did great back there, by the way. Surely we’re going to win the cup this year.”

He feels a blush forming on his cheeks at your comments. “Thanks.” A brief pause before he speaks again, “I’ll be on my way to the locker rooms to take a shower. Just wait for me, okay, love? I’ll be quick.” 

He’s gone off before you even get to speak.

A few minutes go by, and you start to get impatient. You know you weren’t supposed to, but you did it anyway. You snuck in the locker rooms. By that time, it seems that the rest of Cedric’s team had been gone by then. 

You look for the changing rooms, and by some miracle you walk in on just the right time. The only occupied stall’s door flung open, only to reveal Cedric walking out with his trousers on and is in the middle of putting on his blouse— but you were able to get a peek of what was underneath. He looked fresh from the shower, too, with his hair all wet.

If this is what you get to see after every game, you might just sign up for the quidditch team at this point.

You admired the few moments you had when he was shirtless, how the droplets of water ran down his toned body. It was as if he were carved from marble. He takes notice of you, his face flushing at the unexpected visit. He was putting on his golden striped black tie at this point. 

“Hi,” was the first thing he said. “Hi,” you reply back, the two of you grin at each other during the awkward exchange.

“Why’re you here?” He stammered, still a bit surprised. It wasn’t that you haven’t seen him getting dressed before, no, you have plenty of times. It was just completely unpredictable of you to barge in like this.

Feeling a bit mischievous, you don’t answer his question and push him back into the changing room, joining in as well. It was obvious that it was definitely fit for only one person.

The air in the room shifted quickly to something hot and heavy, filled with enough tension so thick you could probably use a knife to cut it. Cedric didn’t waste a minute, crashing his lips against yours. He slithers his hands onto your waist, pulling you closer so that you feel yourself press up against one another. 

You didn’t think it’d escalate anything beyond a make-out session. Oh, you were so wrong.

Your breaths became shallow, too caught up in the moment to think of anything else. Taking you aback, he suddenly, but gently pushes you down so that you sink onto your knees. Before doing anything else though, Cedric makes sure that you’re okay with this.

Too worked up already, his hand tightly grasps your hair as he shoves your face onto his pants, which does a very poor job of hiding his hard on. “Ced–” you try to speak, but before you could say anything he’s already unzipped his pants and is currently shushing you up with his cock.

“Shhh, just take it.” 

Compliantly, you let him take the initiative of the situation. He wasn’t touching you– or more specifically touching you in a sense to please you. Right now, he was trying to get himself off. Using you. Which you found incredibly hot.

It definitely is way out of what Cedric is used to, since making you feel good is always his top priority. It wasn’t until a couple of days ago you had a talk about this, you encouraged that the both of you try something new. 

While he was hesitant at first (of course he wanted to put you first), you assured him you’d feel good all the same. In the end, you both agreed on Cedric trying next time to be more.. selfish? Selfish. And rough.

You just didn’t think the “next time” you talked about would happen now, of all situations. 

You feel your stomach churn. (You felt like you were going to explode, honestly.) He made you feel all sorts of things, even if you weren’t really his main priority right now.

He slowly pushed himself into your mouth, still careful not to cause any discomfort. To tease him, you swirl your tongue around his dick as you hollow out your cheeks. He grunts at the sudden action. He bucks his hips against your mouth in response, causing you to gag as you take more of him in. 

You grab onto his thighs as if you were holding on for dear life as he begins bobbing your head. You look back up at him, seeing him with a really pleased expression– eyes closed, panting heavily, his jaw hanging, leaving his mouth open in an o-shape as he lets out soft groans.

You could hear him curse under his breath while also muttering words of praise. He only roughens his pace more, beginning to thrust into your mouth as you try to keep up by breathing through your nose, getting all teary eyed too.

“Merlin, you’re doing so well f’me,” he says breathlessly. All you can do is hum in response.

Each time he practically drives himself into your throat, you can feel the wind getting knocked out of you. (In a good way, of course.)  As much as Cedric loved to be slow, sappy, and romantic, he definitely had a filthy side to him and a thing for shanking around in places you aren’t supposed to. 

Yeah. You’d never forget the quickie beneath the staircase in the Yule Ball, or when he went down on and fucked you in the prefect’s bathroom.

Since you’re unable to control your pace nor take any breaks, saliva wells up in your mouth– escaping your lips as you drool onto the floor, and all over his cock. It only serves to fuel Cedric even more, and he only proves your point when you spot him with a slight smirk on his face.

The rush it gives you is overwhelming, you felt as if you’d come like this– untouched. You can’t ignore the wetness pooling in your underwear.

The firm grip on your hair gets tighter, his thrusts more erratic, and you were sobbing, gagging and drooling on his cock. You could tell he was close.

“Yeah, that’s it,” he pants, “just keep letting me use you,” his voice rough and low, that familiar tone he uses unconsciously in bed that you like. He would always be so into every moment that he does little things like that which he doesn’t notice– but you did. You loved taking note of them. 

“Oh, m’gonna–” He pushes your head, forcing you to completely take every inch of his dick. He cums as you’re being held securely in place, nose pressed up against his groin and all. 

Your head jerks reflexively, also gagging as hot spurts of cum hit the back of your throat. You swallow desperately. Your poor attempts leave his seed overflowing from your mouth, dripping down your chin.

Cedric pulls you away, his hand letting go of your head as he tucks his cock back into his pants. He was seemingly satisfied with himself.

You swallow the rest of his cum before you speak. “You should do this more often,” you manage to say, in a hoarse tone. He grinned at that fact, quite delighted at his work. “Yeah, I think I got a bit carried away,” he says, not a hint of sorry at all in his tone. 

“You did,” In an effort to look presentable, you wipe your chin, ridding any excess cum on your face. Also combing your hair, which had gone all frizzy, to straighten it out. Or trying to, at least.

“T’was good, though.” You say while flattening out your skirt, giving him a peck on the cheek afterwards.

“Glad you liked it then.”

Both of you hurried on to the great hall for lunch. His teammates exchanged suspicious looks. One asked why he took an unusually long time in the locker rooms. 

#cedric diggory smut #cedric diggory x reader #harry potter #cedric diggory #cedric diggory x you #cedric x reader #hp smut #cedric diggory x reader smut #cedric diggory x female reader #cedric diggory imagine #cedric diggory oneshot #harry potter universe #smut #female reader #harry potter fanfiction

[buckttommy]

When buck screams tommys name in distress, how would you like it to happen?

well. so. obviously tommy gets hurt on the job and obviously buck witnesses it. i don't know how it happens, necessarily. i know 911 said they didn't necessarily want to do big wildfires out of respect for the fact that they have big wildfires in california, but that's the only thing i can think of, like. i don't know if you've seen the og/ls crossover episode (i'm going to assume you have) but having all these firefighters together.. it's the most time buck and tommy have ever spent together while on the job. they do little check-ins with each other throughout the days as the week stretches on, just to make sure they're safe, just to make sure they're coping well. they never do anything more than kiss and hold each other for a couple minutes in a dark/quite corner of one of the sleep tents, both because they're exhausted and because it's definitely not the time or place, but. it's enough. you know?

and so. about eight days into the wildfire, a group of firefighters goes missing. they're completely unresponsive, and that's a bad sign, so tommy's unit has to fly in to go get them. when buck learns tommy's flying out for this specific rescue, he's anxious as hell. that area he's flying out to went bad days ago, visibility is shit, and the group of firefighters that stopped responding was the last group that was ever going to be sent out before the whole area was going to be considered too far gone to save. so he's nervous. scared shitless, actually. but tommy just pulls him aside and he smiles that warm, loving, reassuring smile of his. kisses him and says, "don't worry i'll be okay, everything is okay" and he's scared too, buck can see it in his eyes, but he kisses him back hard and long and just tells him, like, "come home safe to me, ok?" and it's a request but it's also a demand. tommy has to come home. there's no other option. not one that buck can survive, at least.

so tommy goes away and buck/the rest of the 118/some others are is deployed to an area that's pretty close to where tommy is supposed to be flying overhead. after a while, buck gets into a rhythm, so he doesn't think (much) about tommy and just focuses on the task at hand and what he has to do. and then at some point, he hears a chopper overhead and he's so relieved... up until the moment that he notices something is very fucking wrong. he doesn't know what, exactly, but the helicopter is going down and he can't fucking breathe and it is has nothing to do with the smoke. and buck, like.... it'd be one thing if he was hearing about it after the fact, you know? if he heard about it after, he'd be spared the sheer, lifechanging panic of what it looks like to see his world collapse in real time. but he's actually standing there, and he's witnessing the love of his fucking life go down in a wildfire and. so. yeah. he screams tommy's name at the top of his lungs. he's not even aware that he's doing it, tbh. it's completely involuntary, a byproduct of watching this person he loves so much literally die (so he thinks). and there are arms around his waist (he doesn't know whose, but they feel like eddie's) holding him back to keep from running, and someone's talking into a radio (bobby maybe?) but everything is just. it's chaos. his head his chaos, his heart stopped beating ages ago and now he's just. dead. just dead and waiting for, praying for a miracle he's not sure will ever come—

(and. so. obviously tommy is fine. buck doesn't actually, like, learn this fact until several hours later when he is already so firmly entrenched in the deepest depression/state of grief he has ever been in in his life (and considering he watched eddie get shot in front of him, saw a bridge collapse on top of bobby, and his sister was kidnapped presumed dead, that's saying a LOT). but then tommy staggers into the tent and buck absolutely falls the fuck apart. like. tommy barely gets a step inside before buck is on him—before they're on each other, actually—and. like. he's not okay at all. like. he's injured and should definitely 100% be on his way to the hospital. but he knew, okay? tommy kinard knows his boy and he knew what kind of state he would be in. so yeah, stopping by to see him was a no brainer. their reunion only lasts a couple minutes before tommy's body starts to give out on him and, like, yeah, hospital now. but. buck goes with him, and he doesn't leave his side once except when tommy goes through surgery and... everything is not okay but neither of them had the worst day of their lives and that's all buck could ever ask for.)

(and if they finally tell each other they love each other when tommy gets out of surgery and comes out from under the haze of anesthesia. well. that's just between them)

#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #*wounded jack noises* #this hurt my feelings AND put them back together [< girl who literally wrote the thing] #anyways #this headcanon is. like. a sequel to the one linked btw. just in case you need to know how crazy this whole thing makes me #jack answers mail #tv: 911 #bucktommy

[lavender--fairy]

Why do you 'fail'?

Short answer: because you give up the desired state of mind (aka: belief) and go back to your "confort zone" where you cultivate your old patterns of thoughts and feelings.

Have you noticed how, when you start any LOA method how you feel full of excitment, all happy and almost blissful? Because in that moment, even if it may be a short one: you understand your power and you use it! ... and often, after a day or two you feel low again and forget it.  And then you re-start the old habitual loop: may it be seeking a "new miracle" method or a new miracle book or a guru.

This habit is in fact you giving up your own power and subconsciously it is telling "it must be some other way because that way that I have will not work". The fact is that almost all ways work if you just stick to one and refuse to shift your energy back to negative, old, habitual one. YOU HAVE TO STICK TO IT! You have to use the power of will and refuse to give up: NO MATTER WHAT YOUR MIND WILL MAKE AS EXCUSE! Because the mind is very good at that, very convincing! Because it is the old habitual state of mind (belief) protecting itself.

No matter what proof/evidence your mind shows you and say "stop it" or "change it" or read another book, or "find something else"... jus't dont!! The mind makes the same excuses when you meditate: it will make all its possible to make you think or do something while you try to meditate. LEARN TO DIRECT YOUR MIND. Do the method for as long days you decided to do! After a month in general it will become automatic. Your desired state will be "normal" and effortless.

If you start a new method or if you have already started one (mine or from neville or abraham or anyone...) do it fully for a month at least! Even if the method is incorrect/bad (and probably it is not) at least you will build an habit of determination.

YOU DONT NEED A NEW BOOK, YOU DONT NEED A NEW COURSE, YOU DONT NEED A NEW TEACHER, YOU DONT NEED A NEW METHOD YOU PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW EVERYTHING THAT YOU NEED TO KNOW TO MANIFEST WHAT YOU WANT:  YOU NEED TO PRACTICE WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW WITHOUT CHANGING THE DIRECTION OF the MIND EVERY SING DAY.

chose a goal/state of mind

chose a method/technique to accomplish that goal

the mind will fight to make you stop it or change it, or seek something else

just ignore it and refocus and remember why you started the practice: remember that you cannot fail if you follow the method

keep doing it, keep strong, keep ignoring everything that is opposite to your goal even if you feel like it doesnt work

you have gave up here or

the new state of mind feels natural

goal accomplished.

ps: don't take this strictly as a rule, but your effort will look something like that. The key is to not let your mind convince you that only the actual reality is "reality". Thats only the old state of mind protecting its own life and survival. And no matter what evidence is there to support it: understand that it is created by the old state of minde: the new evidence and new reality will be there after the step 8 (as said above)

cr:Allismind

#lavendiary #manifesting #manifestation #law of assumption #master manifestor #motivation #neville goddard #loa blog #loa motivation #loa methods #loa #law of manifestation #law

[edenmemes]

last of us (show) starters

ep1- 9. 

❝ your t-shirt’s inside out. ❞ ❝ you already know i’m bad at lying. ❞ ❝ you are the person i never wanted to be in debt to. but i owe you. ❞ ❝ after all we’ve been through...everything i’ve done...it can’t be for nothing. ❞ ❝ you know what i see when i look at you? me. you remind me of me. ❞ ❝ i need you to take a breath. ❞ ❝ there’s a leader in you. one day, it could be your turn. ❞ ❝ i never liked you, but still, it’s like we’re friends. almost. ❞ ❝ we’re gonna be brave, and we’re gonna get out of this. ❞ ❝ can’t tell you how exciting it was listening to that fucking conversation. ❞ ❝ there you are. i was getting worried. ❞ ❝ a bad reputation doesn’t mean you’re bad. ❞ ❝ how about we just talk this through? ❞ ❝ this isn’t gonna end well. ❞ ❝ when we’re done, we’ll go wherever you want. ❞ ❝ you’re a dangerous person. you’ve certainly proved that. ❞ ❝ i started worrying you wouldn’t wake up. ❞ ❝ we can help each other. and get that gun out of my face. ❞ ❝ i think i’m gonna love you for a long, long time. ❞ ❝ there’s stuff up there you shouldn’t see. ❞ ❝ you ask a lot of goddamn questions. ❞ ❝ you know, i used to be scared of these people. ❞ ❝ i mean...our luck had to run out sooner or later. ❞ ❝ like to think, for once, we could finally win? ❞ ❝ i mean, it’s the long way or the ‘we’re fucking dead’ way. ❞ ❝ you mumble in your sleep. ❞ ❝ wait, who gave you the black eye? ❞ ❝ no. no questions. just do it. ❞ ❝ you can’t fight everything and everyone. you can pick and choose what’s important. ❞ ❝ nobody’s gonna be coming after you, right? ❞ ❝ you stay close and you follow my lead. ❞ ❝ there’s no halfway with this. we finish what we started. ❞ ❝ you’re a natural leader. you’re smart, loyal...violent. ❞ ❝ it’s a miracle you’re alive. ❞ ❝ okay, rocky start. could’ve been worse, though. ❞ ❝ you know what i’m in the mood for? shitty puns. ❞ ❝ it doesn’t matter. you have to trust me. ❞ ❝ you know, people like to tell stories. ❞ ❝ i’m not in the mood for this. i’m really not in the mood. ❞ ❝ you have a greater purpose than any of us could’ve ever imagined. ❞ ❝ how about we start with ‘thank you’? ❞ ❝ i’d like to go home and drink ‘til my face stops hurting. ❞ ❝ i want you to forget this ever happened. ❞ ❝ i believe everything happens for a reason. ❞ ❝ you can’t be stupid like this. ❞ ❝ you so hungry for vengeance? deliver it. ❞ ❝ i’m not going anywhere with you. ❞ ❝ if we come up against anything, you get behind me and you stay there, okay? ❞ ❝ i’m trying to keep you alive. ❞ ❝ did it make you feel better? did it make you feel safe? ❞ ❝ that’s not my fucking home. ❞ ❝ i don’t want your sorries. ❞ ❝ don’t blame me for something that isn’t my fault. ❞ ❝ oh, finally, some fucking luck. ❞ ❝ you won’t survive for long out here. i can protect you. ❞ ❝ no more questions about me. ❞ ❝ you want your jacket back? ❞ ❝ fuck you, man. i didn’t ask for this. ❞ ❝ besides, it’s the thought that counts. ❞ ❝ wasn’t my fault this time. ❞ ❝ i'm sorry, but this has gone on too long. ❞ ❝ i’ve had...more good days with you than with anyone else. ❞ ❝ i need you to take a breath. ❞ ❝ can we start a fire? i’m freezing. ❞ ❝ the darkness is falling, the sky has turned gray. ❞ ❝ matter of fact, we can just keep our histories to ourselves. ❞ ❝ you stay here. you hear anything, yell. ❞ ❝ maybe there's nothing bad out there, but so far there's always been something bad out there. ❞ ❝ so...is it everything you hoped for? ❞ ❝ what do you want me to say? ❞ ❝ you okay? you just seem extra quiet today. ❞ ❝ are you okay? you’re not hurt? nothing? ❞ ❝ there’s no way anyone knows we’re here, right? ❞ ❝ you do what i say when i say it. we clear? ❞ ❝ where would you be without me, huh? ❞ ❝ i’ve been on both sides. ❞ ❝ let’s just handle what we have to handle. ❞ ❝ is it everything you hoped for? ❞ ❝ it doesn’t matter how much you push the envelope, it will always be stationary. ❞ ❝ you hungry? you can share some of mine. ❞ ❝ have i committed a crime? ❞ ❝ it’s got its ups and downs...but you can’t deny that view. ❞ ❝ those things i did...those things that you judge me for, i did those things to keep us alive. ❞ ❝ i swear, i’ve told you everything i know. ❞ ❝ i don’t wanna talk about it. ❞ ❝ just because life stopped for you...doesn’t mean it has to stop for me. ❞ ❝ i'm alone and forsaken by fate and by man. ❞ ❝ here. this make you all nostalgic? ❞ ❝ thanks for still giving a shit about me. ❞ ❝ i am the bad guy because i did a bad guy thing. ❞ ❝ you keep your eyes on me. and don’t look anywhere else. ❞ ❝ i know this hurts. you’re gonna be okay. ❞ ❝ you think i’ve never done shit like that? ❞ ❝ maybe we just call this one a success and say our fond farewells. ❞ ❝ it isn’t fair, your age...having to deal with all of this. ❞ ❝ i was never afraid before you showed up. ❞ ❝ swear to me. swear to me that everything you said is true. ❞ ❝ do i not look scared? ❞ ❝ just a reminder that if you’re dead, i’m fucked. ❞ ❝ what else am i supposed to say? ❞ ❝ it’s not too late. even now...even after what you’ve done. ❞ ❝ i’m sorry. i have no other choice. ❞ ❝ if you just keep going...you find something new to fight for. ❞ ❝ we did what we needed to survive. ❞ ❝ is that what i am? am i one of the ‘wrong people’? ❞ ❝ i shouldn’t have said what i said. i don’t know your situation. ❞ ❝ i don’t wanna hurt you. i wanna help you. ❞ ❝ look, sometimes things don’t work out the way we hope. ❞ ❝ when do we tell the others? ❞ ❝ well, this is what happens when you fuck with fate. ❞ ❝ i saw what you did...the way you killed those men. ❞ ❝ but first, you have to do something for me. ❞ ❝ be careful who you put your faith in. the only people who can betray us...are the ones we trust.  ❞ ❝ you see my face? do i look scared? ❞ ❝ stay awake with me. ❞ ❝ it’s dangerous, but it’s nothing you can’t handle. ❞ ❝ there’s a whole lot you’re not telling me. ❞ ❝ how about you shut the fuck up? ❞ ❝ i would very much like for you to hurt them. ❞ ❝ what i’m about to tell you cannot be repeated to anyone. ❞ ❝ they’re gonna catch us if we don’t run. ❞ ❝ everybody i have cared for has either died or left me. everybody, fսcking except for you. ❞ ❝ lately, there are these moments where the fear comes up outta nowhere. ❞ ❝ i’m not looking for any trouble. ❞ ❝ i think maybe we got a little off on the wrong foot. ❞ ❝ i came here to save you. ❞ ❝ they’re not following us. i think we’re safe. ❞ ❝ i just ran away for a bit, that’s all. ❞ ❝ i thought you were dead. ❞ ❝ you think i can still handle things, but...i’m not who i was. ❞ ❝ oh, maybe i shouldn’t have said anything. ❞ ❝ i should fucking stab you. ❞ ❝ seriously, though, how the fuck do you do that? ❞ ❝ well, i...i don’t know how to swim. ❞ ❝ what the fuck is wrong with you, sneaking up on me like that? ❞ ❝ holy shit, are you dying? ❞ ❝ i was just trying to imagine you wearing that. ❞ ❝ was that the first dead body you ever saw? ❞ ❝ i wasn’t gonna say i’m sorry. i was gonna say that i’ve been thinking about what happened. ❞ ❝ how about you just take the good news? ❞ ❝ why did you bring me here? ❞ ❝ we can just be all poetic and lose our minds together. ❞ ❝ god help any motherfuckers who stand in our way. ❞ ❝ you stay down, you stay low, you stay quiet. ❞ ❝ that easy to give everything up, huh? ❞ ❝ are you gonna kill me? this seems like a perfect place to do it. ❞ ❝ you shouldn’t have had to. i’m sorry. ❞ ❝ you know, you really shouldn’t be all out here on your own. ❞ ❝ turn around and walk away. just go. ❞ ❝ i’ll follow you anywhere you go. ❞ ❝ hold me close to my heart. ❞ ❝ it’s hard to trust strangers. i know. ❞ ❝ i need to know you’re with me. ❞ ❝ the longer i was away...the harder it was to come back. ❞ ❝ did you kill innocent people? ❞ ❝ as much as i love arguing with your stubborn ass...we’re on a mission here. ❞ ❝ don't tell me that i’d be safer with somebody else because the truth is i would just be more scared. ❞ ❝ you have no idea what loss is. ❞ ❝ you’re the one thing i missed from that fucking place. ❞ ❝ when we were talking about hurting people...what did you mean it wasn’t your first time? ❞ ❝ i can’t fucking do this without you. ❞ ❝ it was a joke, okay? in my mind, you loved it. ❞ ❝ well then, give me your hand. ❞ ❝ they haven’t lost faith in you. they’re just scared. ❞ ❝ goddamn it, i wanna punch you so bad. ❞ ❝ looks different in the daylight, huh? ❞ ❝ i know you mean well. i know you wanna protect me. ❞

#rp meme #rp starters #roleplay meme #roleplay starters

[deeply-embarrassing]

dissecting shauna's trip in "purgatory" with her son in 2x06

okay so shauna's "hallucinations" with her son are devastating. the fact she'll never be sure whether she truly held him is already a lot, but 2x06 is even worse to rewatch if you believe in three theories**:

there's a purgatory, and what the person who's between life and death experiences depends on whether "it" wants them to survive

eating/drinking in purgatory condemns you

blood has value in the wilderness

just like with jackie, purgatory for shauna and her son is sweet and believable at first. everyone is there, everything is fine. purgatory is giving shauna everything she hoped for.

except it's not. because whenever shauna tries to feed her baby, it doesn't work. why? there were food/drinks available in jackie's and lottie's purgatories. whether shauna's body could realistically produce milk doesn't matter, as she does eventually manage to breastfeed him. and her son is hungry, he's so hungry he can't stop crying.

why isn't he eating? why isn't it working? maybe her son instinctively knows he shouldn't. maybe milk is not what he's hungry for, and she's offering the wrong thing. maybe she can't produce what he needs just yet.

meanwhile the wilderness is starving, "it" needs to be fed. "it" picks the people shauna trusts the most, and portrays them as annoyed by the kid's cries (tai) or as already condemning him to death (natalie). a clever way to goad shauna into trying to feed him more insistently.

frustrated none of it works, "it" starts to break the sweet illusion, creating more shocking situations appealing to shauna's fears. lottie taking her child away, becoming the child's mother. she'll feed him (physically and psychologically), unless shauna does it first.

from that moment on, "it" makes tea available to shauna. "we need to feed": it's going to be her or the baby. the tea or the milk. however, ideally, "it" would rather have the baby: the tea is easy to miss in this scene, just sitting there, undiscussed. probably because shauna would be more useful to the wilderness.

eventually, shauna sits with her son. for the first time, she tells him that she loves him, that she's sorry she used not to. as soon as she starts speaking to him, his "hunger-induced" crying stops.

(it might be another "physical hunger as the expression of psychological hunger, of longing for love and connection" yellowjackets moment. the baby hadn't been crying for milk, in this reality, but for love. and when hunger is psychological, you can only be fed by the people whom you're connected to. jackie was given tea by the group, after shauna brought her inside. lottie was given food by laura lee. love is "psychological food", and it's portrayed as literal food in these scenes.)

so, the only one who can feed the baby is someone who loves him. shauna explicitely does, now, and she asks him to drink for her. she says it's how they'll stay together. so he does. she kills him while trying to do the opposite.

""natalie"" comes in just a few seconds later, bringing shauna tea. the kid kept refusing to drink, so it was time to make the mother truly notice the tea. but then "nat" realizes the baby is drinking: it's finally happening. it's a miracle.

"she" directly wants to "tell the others", which probably is code for informing the trapper/hunter. it echoes with "so glad you're joining us, we've been waiting for you" in jackie's purgatory, or "i think we need to get you out of here" in lottie's.

shauna is so fcused on her son that she doesn't even acknowledge the tea. in every way, her son's death saves her life. loving him, feeding him, being awed by him, saves her life.

she asks for a bit more time alone with the baby, she has no way of knowing what she's truly asking for. the attention of "nat" has completely switched, though. "she" avoids looking at shauna and is focusing on the baby, a bit shocked, a bit hungry. and though "she" protests a little, eventually "she" accepts the request. it's not evil, just hungry?

then, she wakes up next to an empty crib, the tea and the group's offerings. and the group is eating her baby: all of them, including ben, who didn't eat jackie. the baby's dead, and "it" is eating him in front of her.

blood had been spilled in this world, all over the symbol, by eating the baby. and in real life, it's been spilled through the group's blood offerings and shauna's body. "it" isn't hungry anymore. shauna wakes up in real life.

-> we're not sure whether these death sequences are "real", if there truly are "wilderness entities" manipulating them towards life or death or if their minds are making it up depending on their own wishes/fears. but if it's real, then 2x06 shows us shauna being manipulated into killing her own child right in front of us. and just like her, we'll probably never know for sure if she truly held him. if it was all just hallucinations or something else, something both better and worse.

ps: severe placenta praevia kills both the baby and the mother during childbirth if you don't do a cesarian. from a medical point of view, shauna totally should have died. either the writers didn't look it up, either the wilderness heard them ♥

(**of course, said "purgatory" or "wilderness" don't have to be real things that exist within the show's universe. these death sequences can just be a way to explore further the themes of psychological hunger and consumption, though i personally find that hard to believe. why is food what kills them in these death sequences, offered by the people they love? perhaps the idea is that hunger means you're alive. you're not meant to have everything you want, complete comfort. only death will offer you that. didn't explore that much in this post, it's a super large theme, and there are parts of shauna's "hallucinations" which i struggle to explain without supernatural elements, such as the tea or ben also eating the baby.)

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets meta #shauna shipman #deadass made me cry #im like “we dont know if it's real” but explain to me why jackie's mind would make up a random man in the cabin as she's dying #doesn't make any sense to me! #and shauna did NOT dream that bc all these death sequences have the exact same rules. rules she had no way of knowing #which means the wilderness might have purposefully made her watch jackie's last moments... i hate “it”!

[x-0ophelia0-x]

two separated souls, reunited.

Pairings: Ezra Bridger x F!Reader Warnings: Ahsoka S1 Spoiler!, it’s my first fic too, please have mercy, it’s also not proof read, supposed to wake up for school in 4h :D

word count: 1,4k

summary: you and Ezra were in a relationship. After his disappearance back in Lothals big fight, you promise to yourself to find him, no matter the cost.

authors note: as I mentioned before this is my first story, well in english at least. I’ll correct the mistakes tomorrow, just wanted to post this already due of the lack of Ezra content here :´D

I hope you like it! <3

„I couldn’t have wished for a better family…can’t wait to come home“

Those lines were stuck in her head.

10 years had already passed since that eventful day. 

10 long years of not knowing what to do.

Her nightmares where plagued by her memories.

The horrific sight of Thrawns flagship being held by purrgils, ready to jump into hyperspace. Knowing that he was still in there. 

Not being able to see him one last time before their ways parted for who knows how long. 

Only hearing his voice through her comm link.

And just like that he was gone. 

Gone somewhere far away from them.

y/n didn’t want to give up.

Ezra meant the world to her and that day just broke her. 

And as the years passed by she started to lose hope.

What if he didn’t survive the hyperjump? What if he lost his memories?

What if-

What if he died?

She didn’t want to think about that, she’d feel it if something would’ve happened to him, right? Their bond was strong, there’d be some sign trough the force if he really was dead. 

But just as she started to accept the fact that finding him would be impossible, Ahsoka had found a map that may have Ezra’s location on it. And with Ezra’s of corse Thrawn‘s too. Her discovery didn’t go unnoticed though. 

Morgan Elsbeth who was currently working on to get Thrawn back found out about Ahsoka finding the map, sending the ex Jedi Baylan Skoll and his apprentice Shin Hati after her.

That was kind of the start of how everything started to go downhill after that. 

Sabine managed to unlock the map but the joy didn’t last long. 

Droids attacked her, followed by Shin. They managed to steal the map, leaving Sabine wounded. 

Those days where filled with quite the action, leading them to this point. 

Ahsoka, Sabine and y/n tracked the hyperspace ring.

They then hid themselves somewhere on that planet.

Shin and the Inquisitor Marrok found them, attacking them to eliminate the threads to Thrawns return. 

A lot happened, leading to the situation of Ahsoka being thrown off a cliff, Sabine lying knocked out on the cold unforgiving ground and y/n having to make an decision. 

Whether to give them the map and follow them as their prisoner, having the chance to finally find Ezra. Or destroy the map and with that the last chance to find her lover.

It was a tough decision but deep down she knew what she had to do.

If there was a chance that Ezra was still alive, she’d have to try her best to find him, to bring him home.

And just like that she handed the map over to Baylan. 

And her journey began. 

-

She was now riding on a howler, recalling everything that had happened. 

Thrawn was alive. And he had an army. 

There were more Nightsisters, helping Thrawn.

But the strangest thing?

They just let her go, even gave her some Proviant and a Howler.

y/n already got attacked by some smugglers or hunters… 

honestly, whatever they where, they wouldn’t stop her from finding him.

Not when she was so close. 

The attack destroyed some kind of device though, showing her Ezra’s last known location. y/n Just hoped to find him by some miracle. 

At some point the howler seemed to have found something. 

It went to a dried out river she assumed, sniffling on some rocks. 

„damn.. I think you’ve lost it.. those are just rocks“

She chuckled, stroking the howlers back.

But it didn’t stop and just when it’s sniffling intensified, the rock moved.

„karabast..“

She whispered.

That rock just moved. 

The howler ran closer to that.. thing?

„Hey.. we’re not going to harm you.. and you don’t have to hide anymore

since we kind of already know about your camouflage“

It took some seconds but the creature in front of them revealed itself. 

It was some kind of an walking crab thing, looking innocent. 

„There you go.. so…“

y/n was at a loss of words. She didn’t even knew if that creature understood her, well most likely not considering that she was from another Galaxy. 

But then something caught her attention. 

That crab creature wore some kind of necklace, with a sign on it. 

It was Sabines firebird. 

Her eyes widened at the realization. 

„E-Ezra Bridger..“

She looked deep into it’s eyes, hoping that it’d understand her.

„Do you know Ezra Bridger?“

It seemed to be confused at first, but it also seemed to recognize the name.

„Ezra Bridger?“

It asked with a high voice. 

y/n nodded.

„Yes.. I’m his friend! Do you know where he is now?“

The creature seemed to think about something, it then called

for his friends, leading to some ‚rocks’ start to move and reveal themselves as crab creatures. 

They then gestured her to follow them, leading her to a small village. 

Their houses were small, looking like they would only be temporary there. 

Crab people where walking around, doing their daily chores or just relax, sitting, sleeping or playing while the others looked at their new guest. 

They then stopped, leaving her alone.

She looked around, capturing the sight in front of her. 

Never in her life would’ve she expected herself to be standing in the middle of a village, somewhere in another Galaxy on a planet called Perridea. 

Just as she was looking at some things of the village, she heard a voice.

„I knew I could count on you… y/n“

She felt like as if her heart skipped a beat. 

She’d recognize his voice everywhere.

The voice of the one person whose made the ultimate sacrifice to keep his new family, his planet and his Galaxy safe from Thrawns games.

Ezras voice

She slowly turned around, her eyes fixating on the man in front of her. 

He was leaning against the wall of one of those houses, his arms crossed. A smile, so warm, kind and loving placed on his face.

He had grown, which was to be expected after 10 years of corse.

His hair had grown longer, his curly waves being a stark contrast to the buzz cut he had when she last saw him. 

He even had a beard now.

Her eyes then shifted to his, locking gazes with him. 

They were still the same vibrant blue as the day she lost him. 

Still so beautiful that she got lost in them for some seconds.

„Ezra..?“

She then asked, giving her everything to hold back tears.

„It sure took you long enough to find me..“

He chuckled, but his voice gave away that he also was holding his tears back.

Her legs then started to move on their own, running to him, not wanting to waste any more second. 

Ezra still stood there, opening his arms to catch her, to pull her into a tight embrace. And so he did. 

She clung to him as if he was her lifeline, not daring to let go, scared that he’d disappear again if she’d loosened her grip on him.

„I missed you.. so much..!“

She couldn’t hold back her tears any longer. 

They now streamed freely down her face.

„I missed you too..“

He said, holding her as close as he could.

Both of them had so many questions that didn’t seem to matter right now.

Everything they needed was this one embrace, ensuring them that they found each other again. 

When they pulled apart, they were again looking into each others eyes.

Ezra then wiped away y/s‘s tears, placing his hand on her left cheek while trying to find the right words.

„Thank you… thank you for finding me“

She then placed her hand over his hand, holding it gently.

„Don’t thank me for that… I love you, I’d do anything for you, even if it means to fly into another Galaxy to find you“

She said, laughing at the last part. And he too chuckled while hearing it.

„I love you too.. and I can’t wait to come home“

#ezra bridger x reader #ezra bridger x y/n #ezra bridger #Star Wars rebels

[allforone-appreciation]

I like that everyone sees Afo in their own way. Someone thinks that he understood, family is what Afo always wanted and decided to leave the evil empire. Someone thinks that he knows little about feelings, but wanted to be loved, so this led to the creation of a family, but in the end he left her due to the fact that she prevented him from becoming the “demon king” as his love for his wife and son began to grow. Someone believes that an event simply happened in the Midoriya family because of which Afo left, perhaps he couldn’t stand the fact that All Might had taken over his life and when Izuku wanted to play heroes in the All Might costume, he accidentally got a slap in the face, so Hisashi left so as not to harm the family. I have already asked this question to others. I want to hear your version)😊

AFO is the kind of character that will always have a huge range of interpretations to him. Just because of how dishonest he is in nature we can never truly know his feelings or true intentions. So we can only piece what his actions say and the few thoughts he has.

I note how you are mentioning a lot of DFO so I'm assuming you want my opinion on that too? Because as you know I'm a big fan so will be super happy to give you my interpretation on AFO especially in relation to that.

When it comes to AFO, I always imagined him with no empathy even as a child. This is NOT a born evil thing or anything as just having a lack of empathy doesn't mean you are automatically evil. As there are ways to teach people like that how to get along and have Logical empathy, basically a skill where you can logic out how said people can feel which he clearly learned later in life. But I digress. Basically because of his lack of empathy growing up in a survival of the most violent era would shape his personality. It honestly more a miracle that despite doing anything to survive he kept Yoichi around. Likely Yoichi agrees with this as in the end Yoichi was not benefitting AFO as he had to provide for two while Yoichi couldn't do anything.

Just this fact shows that AFO didn't really care that Yoichi didn't provide any actual benefits. This throws a point that he can be 'caring' to those he deems as company he enjoys. However his lack of empathy makes it so he always ignores Yoichi's input especially after struggling to survive for so long with never being cared for or loved. Without any idea of love or affection in his background, is it any surprise all he equated this illogical attachment too is just not wanting to lose his possession? His first gift? Especially as it been shown he is very envious of everyone having thing that he never had. Like a home, cars, and that includes a happy family. The last one he ends up losing after basically throwing his little brother in a vault for being unruly then seeing red when he leaves with the rebels. Accidentally killing his brother.

All this fact is important as we see he never process or got over losing his brother. Pursuing OFA just for his brothers vestige but likely after over a 100 years he got lonely. Desperate but he would never be honest or claim such a thing, but would allow a 'family' to occur to try and fill the void in his own heart.

I do not believe AFO would hurt his own son directly. Even in a rage after what happened to Yoichi, likely if he realized was becoming blinded by anger that would be a signal for him to leave. As likely he wouldn't be able to live with the idea of murdering his only family again because of rage. BUT making the excuse it because was holding them back.

However, I don't believe that's why he left. I legit imagined he kept up his double life for a long ass time almost shamelessly. Acting like a normal man using the fact he says he 'works over seas' as an excuse to not be around often. While still enjoying the benefits of a family whenever he does come by to visit, hell he was still kidnapping kids you see Tomura and Touya up till Izuku's birth.

And with his lack of empathy sees nothing wrong with a double life as long as he keeps the normal family happy and content. Then they would remain his family forever.

....Then during one of those visits All Might found him. It implied AFO was caught off guard which is what gave All Might the edge likely because AFO was trying to pretend to be a normal guy. But after getting caught was forced to fight and likely was trying to evacuate, only to get his head smashed in and technically killed.

Without his face there was no reasonable explanation he could give that would allow him to see his family. I imagine the quirks to 'change' appearance still required there to be a FACE to be changed. And that is what he's referring too when he claims AFO stole something precious from him. He stole his family away just like Kudou did, hence his hatred being quite strong.

Any interaction with the family likely is by email, mail and with checks just so they are alive. But he can't talk or interact with them at all in the state he is in. Still believing they are his but unable to interact with them like he used to with his face utterly destroyed. Hence his small pestering about being fixed likely was not actually meant in playful jest and something he hounded the doctor several times about.

He left his family not because he wanted too, because he NEVER gives up what he believes is his, but because he was forced too. Unless wished to get another Detroit smash to the face by showing he's alive or reveal to his family his actual job and get them running away like Yoichi.

So basically I see him as a man who lives a double life, an actual legit monster and yet also casually a normal man with said family. What would cause dissonance in others he saw no issue with since his family are his while other people are only useful or not. Until was suddenly crippled and could no longer have the joy of family he had craved, becoming more submerged in his hatred of All Might. Because while didn't care about such a tiny part of his empire falling.

His family is something he will destroy the earth and even the family itself if he must to keep them safe and at his side. And that's how I enjoy him to be in my interpretation.

#All for One MHA #All for One BNHA #Dad for One #mha afo #afo bnha #All for One #afo confessions #Founder: Yoly #pizrad

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

Love Song for a Vampire Pt 27

Pairing(s): Edward Cullen x Wolf!Reader

Warnings: a splash of jealousy from tanya but don’t worry, irina wants to rip the head off of any and all wolves

Words: 2155

Part 1    Part 2    Part 3    Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16  Part 17  Part 18  Part 19  Part 20  Part 21  Part 22  Part 23  Part 24  Part 25  Part 26  Part 28  Part 29  Part 30  Part 31  Part 32  Part 33  Part 34  Part 35  Part 36  Part 37  Part 38  Part 39

You thought your mother would never relinquish you from her bear-like hug. This was the first time you were leaving your parents to go somewhere with people who were complete strangers to them.

They were putting a lot of trust in Sam’s words reassuring them that you would be able to handle anything.

Being the people that they were, they agreed knowing it would ultimately be for the best. Sam revealed everything to them except for you imprinting on Edward.

That would be for you to tell on a day of your choosing.

Hastily you pack essentials into a backpack. You were initially surprised when Edward told you the drive wouldn’t take too long.

Now you understood.

His car must have been a blip on the road from how fast he was driving. Carmen and Eleazar didn’t reciprocate your shock, in fact they seemed to be used to it and were chatting casually with you.

Eleazar sat up front with Edward while you were in the back with Carmen, your arms wound securely around your backpack to keep yourself anchored against the velocity. Eleazar mentioned something as out being uncomfortable out in the daytime but that timing was imperative

They hardly encountered anyone on the road by some miracle which also helped to reduce travel time.

“You can really do that?” Astonishment lilting in your voice.

Eleazar chuckles and nods. “Yes, much like Alice and Edward, Kate and I have special abilities.”

“Which leads me to some important tips.” Carmen nods, her gold eyes flicking toward you. “Do not let Kate touch you. Her power can only harm you if she is able to get into contact. I don’t think she’ll try to hurt you, she’s the more level-headed sister. But on the off chance she does, just keep out of reach of her hands.”

“Don’t scare her before we even reach home.” Her mate teases.

She laughs and bumps her arm against your’s. “(Y/n)’s tough. This isn’t going to scare her off.”

“I have seen her decapitate many newborns during our fight with Victoria’s army.” Edward knowingly chimes in.

“Impressive.” Eleazar cocks an eyebrow and looks to the rear view mirror at you. He truly meant it for going up against newborns was no easy task to take on. Working in the Volturi, Eleazar had to tel with many unruly newborns. How he survived for so long in a hostile environment, you had no idea. The Eleazar you had met was kind and docile, speaking in a tender tone constantly. You couldn’t imagine him living in a dangerous coven like the Volturi. He found his way out though and decided to lead his life peacefully with no more violence. 

“Of course avoiding conflict never works.” He finishes off. “There will always be others who want to destroy tranquility.”

Carmen reaches her hand out to rub her husband’s shoulder. “We will fight when the time comes. Be assure of that. We love Edward and the Cullens. They are our extended family and we’ll protect that extended family even if Kate and Tanya side with Irina.”

You didn’t want there to be inner conflict in their coven. Didn’t want them to divide because of this. Allies were needed though and you’d have to take whoever was willing.

*

By the time you reach the border to Alaska, the sky was already pitch black with a multitude of stars. Having dozed off at some point, you check the time on your phone. It was a little past midnight. 

The dirt road that wound up the mountain was beautiful even in the dark. Large expanse of the land easily viewed from the window of the car.

“You and your pack would have a marvelous time running around here.” Carmen hums delightfully, happy to finally be home. 

The wolf in you shivers in agreement, your limbs suddenly getting an itch to run. To toss aside your human skin and jump into your furs. Only then would you truly be able to immerse yourself with the nature around you. Inhaling large gulps of burning cold air that would be even fresher than back home. Even less humans populated this part of the state as it was basically wilderness. In your fur you’d even be able to somewhat understand the songs that came twittering from birds. 

Sam’s pack would most likely never venture this far away from Forks. Their purpose was there, to protect and watch over everyone, not to frolic around. It was nice to think about though. The younger wolves would especially have a fun time in Alaska.

When the car reached the Denali house, there were already three figures waiting. Three blonde haired women, each more beautiful than the next. 

Piercing eyes follow your movement as you get out of the car; Edward heaves your bag onto his shoulder and carries it for you.

Carmen goes to hug each sister and give them kisses on the cheek. Their smiles are strained as they return her affection. Bodies rigid at your unwanted presence.

“Be nice girls, this is (y/n). She’s part of the Uley pack and has come here to personally get to know you and show her pack means no harm.” Carmen brings you closer by gently leading you by your shoulders. “(y/n), this is Tanya, Kate and Irina.”

You muster your best friendly smile. “It’s nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard so much from Carmen and Edward. I hope. . . I hope I can help mend things between your coven and our pack.”

“Only because you need us.” The vampire Carmen had introduced as Irina points out haughtily. 

Not wanting to argue, you nod because you did in fact need them. “Yes. Yes we do. My pack my be large and strong but we still lack numbers necessary to fight off the Volturi.”

You notice Tanya flicking her eyes behind Carmen to Edward who stood silently watching the exchange. Whatever thoughts going through her head made Edward scowl slightly, his grip tightening around the strap of your backpack. 

Kate coaxes Irina back and offers you an apologetic gaze. “Welcome (y/n). We’re excited to get to know you. You must be tired. Our guestroom has been prepped and is ready for you. We’ve also prepared some food too if you’re hungry.”

You quizzically raise a brow. From your expression, Kate laughs. “Don’t worry, it’s human food. We may not need it for nourishment but that didn’t stop us from learning how to cook for human guests.”

Part of you wonders what happened to those human guests. From the looks of their eyes, the Denali coven appeared to be vegetarians like the Cullens. Varying shades of gold dusted the trio of blondes’ irises.

“I can show her to the guest room.” Edward makes his way forward, taking a protective stance next to you. His face challenges Tanya who almost opened her mouth to say something but it was Carmen who saved the day. 

“Of course. Go show your mate where she’ll be staying.”

A furious blush claims you at Carmen calling you Edward’s mate in front of everyone. You were pretty sure even Edward would have blushed if his cheeks were capable of it from the way he ducked his head with bashfulness.

“I wouldn’t say we’re mates.” You hastily go to correct her.

“But you have. . . What was the word you used Carmen? Imprinted? Yes, but you’ve imprinted on him which means you’ll ultimately become mates.” Tanya icily says.

Any previous excitement you might have felt was deflated. You still held onto a compliant smile. “Yes. . . That’s true. But we’ve barely started getting to really know each other.”

“How cute. They’re in the puppy love stage.” Says Irina dryly. It makes your spine tingle and you have a quick vision of your wolf snapping Irina in two.

You had great control over anger that triggers your transformations but by no means had you mastered them. You were still a young wolf yourself after all. And you felt that anger bleed into your veins, making your left hand tremble.

“Okay!” Edward cuffs your elbow and steers you to the front door. “I think I should show you to the guest room now.” He sears Tanya and Irina with a glare before turning his face forward. When it’s just you two trudging up the stairs Edward apologizes offer them. “Pay no mind to what they say. They’ve always had sharp tongues toward newcomers.”

You were grateful Edward got you out when you did. Taking a deep breath, you collapse on the bed and put your head between your knees. Ears burned and you were all too aware of the hairs on your arms prickling.

He’s quiet as you calm down. Listening in on your breathing as an indicator.

“I’m sorry.” You finally say.

“Don’t apologize. You showed excellent self control. What they said was out of line.” Edward sits next to you on the bed. “Are you okay? Do you need me to get you anything?”

Your muscles were finally starting to relax and untighten. “No, thank you. I’ll be okay. This just happens sometimes. One of the cons is that wolves are highly emotional.”

“It’s better than feeling nothing at all.” He murmurs. “Many vampires forget their human lives over time. Not just that but they also forget human emotions too.”

That would be scary indeed to not even retain an ounce of your humanity. In your wolf you felt feral so you could understand on a basic level. While you saw it as an inconvenience, you’d make sure to appreciate your humanity more.

Setting your belongings down on the bed, Edward shyly glances at you. “I’ll be downstairs if you need me.”

You offer him a smile. “Thank you. I’ll holler if I need you.”

He chuckles before leaving.

**

Closing the door to the guest room, Edward feels any gentleness on his face he saved for (y/n) turn to stone as he walked back down the stairs to find everyone else in the bar/lounge area fitted with sleek, black leather couches.

Tanya and Kate occupied the couch that faced the bar while Irina, Carmen and Eleazar were speaking in hushed voices at the counter.

Seeing him, Tanya pounced to her feet and stalked over to him. “Are you insane? It was bad enough when you wanted the human girl as your mate but now you’ve switched to a dog?”

“Don’t talk about her like that.” Edward snapped, his body bristling. 

She didn’t back down. Instead Edward’s own rage fueled her’s. “Are you just going out of your way to hurt me?”

“Tanya-” Carmen starts.

Darkening eyes pierce into Carmen who relented with a weary sigh. Tanya goes back to Edward .

“This isn’t about you.” Edward hissed. “You think I asked for any of this? Since Bella arrived in Forks I find myself being constantly blindsided. For someone who can read minds, I’m utterly clueless to the inner workings of fate and matters that are completely out of my control.”

Tanya advanced to Edward’s spot so they were now face to face. “You wouldn’t have had to go through any of this if you. . . If you had just accepted me.” Her anger was fizzling out to the true despair she was experiencing. Pain surfaced in her voice that made Edward calm down. 

The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Tanya. But he had told her so many times that he did not return her feelings. It would have been easier had he accepted her and taken Tanya as his mate. He wouldn’t be going through any of this mess. Early on, Carlisle attempted to push them together much like he tried to push him with Rosalie. 

Decades had been spent trying to win over Edward. Tanya hadn’t even managed to scrape the surface of his walls though. 

Her jealous thoughts bulldoze him in a vicious flood. Jealousy, resentment, regret. . . They all banged against his mind. 

“I’m sorry.” Edward simply told her. “Sometimes, even for creatures like us, life isn’t rational. I didn’t bring (y/n) here to cause you pain, Tanya. She isn’t here for any other reason except to mend the bridge between the wolves and the Denali coven. That is all.”

Pursed lips made Tanya’s face tighten. Kate comes up from behind her and gently coaxed her adoptive sister back to sitting down. Edward met Irina’s burning glare, reading her mind like an open book. Hate and fury were on the forefront of her thoughts. He saw her desire to rip off (y/n)’s head in the same fashion the wolves had done to Laurent.

He’d make sure to keep an eye on her. If Irina decided to go through with her desires, he knew (y/n) wouldn’t just let her harm here so easily. It would become a bloodbath and risk their mission of peace. 

——

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#edward cullen fanfic #edward cullen fanfiction #edward cullen x reader #twilight saga #twilight fanfiction #twilight fandom #Twilight FanFic

[ha1azian]

After The Fact

Summary: When the blade swung down, you were going to die and you accepted that, so why are you still alive?

TW: Slight panic attack, maybe PTSD, implied beheading.

Note: Writing is hard. Especially when you don't fully understand the workings of tumblr...

To survive a planned execution was to dance a tango with death himself. Your life was in the hands of another, yet the most you could do was follow his lead.

Still, when you had awoken, it was no less than a miracle that you had survived. Sure, your body ached with such a ferocity you had never felt before, but your neck was not severed — at least, not fully.

As daintily as a new born doe, you reached to your neck, you were alive weren't you? The aching new scar had made sure of it. But, it hurt to breathe. It shouldn't hurt to breathe. You were alive. Why did it hurt to breathe?

Crystal tears began to form in the corners of your drawn eyes. Your breath hastened in a panic, it felt as though you were drowning. It hurt to breathe yet you couldn't get enough air to breathe.

It hurt. It burned.

The sound of static permeated the air, yet a distant voice called out your name. The loud hissing had filled your brain making it hard to recognize but it was just familiar enough to ease your panic ridden mind.

Though your panic had subsided, the pain still lingered. Exhausted, your mind drifted back into darkness with the sound of a song you had long forgotten.

When you had awoken for the second time, you didn't panic, you didn't cry. You simply felt numb. The pain assured you that you were still alive but your mind raced with questions. How and why.

You remembered being sentenced to death for a crime you didn't commit, you remembered the tears you had shed pleading with the crowd to save you, only for them to laugh and cackle at your fate, you remembered the way the electricity crackled around the Shogun's blade as it swung down.

When you had first landed in Teyvat, the euphoria you felt was like the highest sugar rush but it all came crashing down when you noticed the people's blades turned.

And you became the hunted.

You don't remember what you did to draw their ire but it was enough. Perhaps this was just another tactic to break you, to drive you to the edge of insanity.

I wish they just killed me.

A soft laugh slipped past your lips and a sardonic smile adorned your face. If they wanted to break you, they already had.

#genshin cult au #sagau #self aware au #genshin sagau #genshin sagau x reader #genshin x reader #sagau cult au #sagau x reader

[clonemando]

Waxer*Boil Month Week 2: Huddling for Warmth/Safety

Boil doesn't like getting left behind while Waxer is out on missions and likes it even less when he is called to Cody's room without hearing back from Waxer after that mission has ended. Thankfully the explanation isn't as bad as he feared and is something he can help with.

Written for @waxerboilmonth Find it on AO3 here.

Boil tried hard to not make it obvious that his hands were shaking as he hurried to Cody’s private quarters where Cody and the General were waiting for him. The last mission had only required a small team so Waxer’s squad had gone while Boil and his men had stayed. It was always hard, watching Waxer leave, not knowing when or if he would return this time. The fact they had both survived this long was already a miracle. 

“Sirs, you asked to see me?” he asked, opening the door with a small knock. He had watched the solemn way Waxer’s boys had come back to their bunks. Normally, Waxer sent him a message as they were leaving and when they returned. This time, his com line had been silent. He didn’t want to believe it, but he had a feeling he knew why he was being called in. He was just grateful Obi-Wan and Cody were telling him in private. 

“Oh thank the force! Cody, Boil’s here. Come in, he won’t stop crying and you’re the one that’s usually closest to him,” Obi-Wan said, grabbing Boil by the arm and basically dragging him into the room.

It was not what Boil expected. Instead, he found Cody on his knees looking for all the world like he was trying to lure a tooka out from under his bed. Hearing Obi-Wan, Cody tried to get up and knocked his head on the bunk with a little yelp. 

“Oh good. Boil, Waxer crawled under the bed and won’t come out or stop crying. We need you to calm him down and get him out.” Cody said, rubbing his head where he had hit it. 

Boil frowned. There wasn’t a ton of space under the bed and he knew that a fully armored trooper wouldn’t be able to fit. “Did he get turned into a tooka?” was out of his mouth before he could stop himself and he felt his cheeks heating as Cody grinned and the General chuckled. 

“Not quite,” Obi-Wan admitted with a shrug, “We found the artifact we were asked to retrieve but Ventress arrived at the same time we did. While Cody and I kept her busy, Waxer snuck up and grabbed the small idol, but it activated. and there was a flash of light before… well.. He shrunk,” 

“He looks and acts like a second year cadet again or a four year old nat-born,” Cody sighed while gesturing to the bed, “We had to abandon his armor since it was too large, but Obi-Wan wrapped him in his outer robes and we all retreated. Once we got in, he immediately hid under my bunk and won’t come out.”

Boil swallowed hard. He knew what a second year cadet looked like. Waxer wouldn’t actually be any cuter than any other cadet that age but… the idea of it sounded really adorable in his mind. 

“Does he still have his memories? We didn’t know each other at that age so he might not trust me if he doesn’t. I’d be a stranger to him, too,” he pointed out.

Obi-Wan shrugged in response. “I honestly don’t know but we decided it was worth having you try. Hopefully, this will be a temporary state and will wear off on its own, but I already contacted Madame Nu to see if she or her archivists can find any more information on reversing it. If not..” Obi-Wan said and Boil nodded, finally kneeling down to peek under the bed.

A hurt sound escaped his lips at the adorable sight awaiting him. It was worse than he thought. Waxer was still bald though his facial hair was gone now and his eyes were red and puffy from crying. He was wrapped so completely in Obi-Wan’s robes that it was like a blanket around him. 

“Hey Wax, you remember me? It’s your friend Boil. It’s okay if you don’t remember but I want you to know, it’s safe here. No one is going to hurt you. We just want to help,” he murmured softly. Remembering how Waxer helped him when he was upset, he didn’t try to reach out immediately. He just waited, lying on his belly on the floor, for Waxer to make a choice. 

Waxer sniffled. “B-Boil? Why… Why am I so small?” he whimpered and Boil relaxed a little—Waxer seemed to remember him, at least. 

“Force crap,” Boil hummed, making Waxer give a surprised giggle at the curse word. It seemed he remembered Boil but he was definitely not himself. Noticing that he was trembling, Boil finally offered a hand. 

“I know you get cold easily. Will you come out and move to the top of the bed? We can wrap you up in blankets and it will be much warmer than only wearing the General’s robes,” he offered but didn’t try to force him. 

“Can I cuddle you?” Waxer asked, eyes wide, and there was no way even the Sith would have been able to deny a request like that, so obviously Boil melted. 

“Of course. Cody will get you some clothes and we’ll both steal his bunk since it’s bigger than what we have in our rooms. We’ll cuddle as long as you need,” he promised, feeling relieved as Waxer finally leaned forward and took Boil’s hand, letting himself be helped out from under the bed.

Obi-Wan and Cody had moved to the other side of the room to give them some space, and Boil noticed that Obi-Wan had stepped up to the door and was talking to someone outside of it- likely to get the cadet uniform for Waxer. 

Waxer immediately tried to use Boil as a shield so the other pair couldn’t see him. “Why are you so afraid of Commander Cody and the General?” Boil asked curiously. It wasn’t like Waxer to be so distrusting. 

“It was loud and they were shouting so much and then we got here and it was cold and there were so many people!” he whined softly and Boil wrapped an arm around him, letting him hide his face in Boil’s shoulder. Boil was in his grays since he hadn’t been scheduled for duty any time soon, so at least there wasn’t any armor in the way. 

Cody stepped forward, “Here, we’ll go to Obi-Wan’s room for now so he can have some space. We’re sorry for scaring you Waxer. We’ll work on getting you back to yourself soon.” he announced, offering Boil the cadet blues. Then Cody and Obi-Wan were gone and Boil relaxed a little before focusing on the little Waxer burrowing himself into Boil’s shirt and trembling slightly. 

“Come on, you’ll be warmer once you’re dressed. Then we can sit on the bed instead of the floor,” he said, gently pushing Waxer off of him so he could stand and guide him to the attached fresher that was a perk of Cody’s Commander status. It was tiny, but it allowed him to clean the dirt off of his tiny ARF partner before helping him into his clothes. 

Waxer was surprisingly quiet through the whole thing, which felt wrong since Boil was usually the quiet one and Waxer usually didn’t know how to stop blabbering, but he was clearly still scared and working through things.

“Come here,” Boil hummed once they got back to the bed. He took all of Cody’s blankets and wrapped them around Waxer so only his eyes could be seen peeking out from the mound. The little giggle warmed his heart even while Boil worried about how long Waxer was going to be stuck like this. 

Waxer’s pout was almost audible as he stared at Boil “But now I can’t snuggle with you and you’re my best friend, so we have to snuggle. I always sleep better when we do.” he pointed out.

Boil’s lips twitched up into a small smirk “Sure we can. Like this,” he said and wrapped himself around the whole blanket bundle, which rewarded him with even more little giggles.

“I guess that’s okay, but I won’t be able to hear your heart beating or feel you breathing and know you’re okay. My brain feels all mushy right now but I remember… I remember that I don’t remember people I should, and that I miss them, and I don’t want to miss you, too,” Waxer murmured after a little bit.

Boil frowned. “I’m not going anywhere. You don’t need to miss me, Wax,” he said, but he carefully freed Waxer’s head from the blankets so he could rest it against Boil’s chest.

That seemed to be the last thing Waxer needed to be able to fall asleep with a little yawn. 

Boil just held him close, making sure he felt warm and safe, and eventually Waxer’s soft breathing lulled him to sleep as well.

#Clone Trooper Waxer #Clone Trooper Boil #CC-2224 | Cody #De-Aged Waxer #Fluff #Platonic Cuddling #Comfort #Force Shenanigans #obi wan kenobi #my writing #fanfic #star wars #the clone wars #tcw #sw tcw #clone troopers #waxerboilmonth #lieutenant waxer #waxer #boil

[agronzky]

⠀⠀⠀ 𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐙𝐀 𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐘𝐋𝐄𝐑 (𝐇𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐓𝐎𝐍) 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒. ♡

"Like I said, you're free to go"

"People shouting in the square"

"Remind me what we're looking for"

"Look around, look around at how lucky we are to be alive right now"

"Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit"

"I'm helpless"

"Then you walked in, and my heart went boom"

"Yo, this one's mine"

"What's she gonna do?"

"I am so into you"

"Now my life gets better every letter that you write me"

"And I'm tryin' not to cry, 'cause there's nothing that your mind can't do"

"I panic for a second, thinking we're through"

"Stay alive"

"I begged him to send you home"

"I relish being your wife"

"The fact that you're alive is a miracle"

"I don't pretend to know the challenges you're facing"

"So long as you come home at the end of the day that would be enough"

"We don't need a legacy"

"Oh, let me be a part of the narrative"

"If I could grant you peace of mind would that be enough?"

"He will never be satisfied"

"There's a little surprise before supper and it cannot wait"

"Run away with us for the summer"

"You and I can go when the night gets dark"

"Take a break and get away"

"I'm sure he already knows"

"I saved every letter you wrote me"

"I thought you were mine"

"Your sentences left me defenseless"

"In clearing your name you have ruined our lives"

"I'm erasing myself from the narrative"

"The world has no right to my heart"

"I hope that you burn"

"Is he breathing? Is he going to survive this?"

"You changed the melody every time"

"It's quiet uptown"

"It's still dark outside"

"Why do you write like you're running out of time?"

"Come back to bed, that would be enough"

"I stop wasting time on tears"

"And when my time is up, have I done enough?"

"I see you every time"

#rp meme #rp memes #rp prompts #roleplay meme #sentence starters #rph #eliza schuyler #hamilton musical #rp ask meme #rp ask prompts #rp ask box meme

[mickeys-malarkey]

BATDR Analysis/Post-Playthrough Theory Revision Pt. 3/4: All this brings me back to Henry and Allison’s apparently-retconned stories.

Funny how the Memory of Joey tells us this story like a fairytale told to a child, isn’t it?

The Memory of Joey: Once upon a time, Audrey, there was a bitter old man. Who had lost just about everything. Audrey: Joey. The Memory of Joey: Right. The real Joey Drew. He blamed everyone but himself for his mistakes, but mostly he blamed his old business partner for abandoning their work, years and years ago. A man by the name of Henry Stein. A great artist and a good friend. In his anger, Joey used an evil machine to create another world. A world made of paper and ink, where he'd torment his own version of Henry forevermore. But one day, a miracle happened. An angel came into Joey's life. A young woman by the name of Allison Pendle. She didn't visit often, but when she did, she saw something good in Joey that no one else could. Including himself. Through their friendship, he began to see the world with better eyes. So one day, in his cartoon cycle of hatred, he gave Henry an angel of his own. To guide him when things were most dark. To always provide hope…

I’m certain that (aside from the green part) this is a fabrication created by Nathan Sr. and his modification of both the Ink Dimension and the memories of the real world contained in the loop in order to keep Bendy/Real Joey trapped and at odds with not just Henry (as I'd originally theorized), but also Allison beyond the grave (while also allowing them to stay friends although they're both trapped as well just to further taunt Joey). First of all, Allison’s surname was already Connor in her BATIM letter, remember? Doesn’t that mean she can’t have been called “Allison Pendle” when she met Joey, if the Memory of Joey’s story were true?! He’s claiming Allison and Joey met after Henry started going through his loops in 1963, remember (he’s literally saying that every scrap of information we have on her is imaginary just with this one claim, because this would mean that the invitation to her and Tom’s wedding in 1952 in The Employee Handbook [BATIM guidebook], where Allison herself wrote that Joey was the reason they met, was fake… Need I remind everyone that theMeatly, himself, literally told us multiple times, including the day after the trailer dropped, that all of BATIM’s established lore is still 100% canon in BATDR)?!?!

Second of all, I noticed long ago that there looked to be about 12-23 hatch marks (depending on if some of those are actually hatch marks or just meaningless scribbles) in Henry’s prison cell in Allison and Tom’s hideout, like the ones in the beginning hallway, and theorized that this meant Henry had been counting not just how many times he’d gone through the whole cycle, but also how many times specific endings had happened. If I’m right, that would mean that about 12-23 of those 414 loops Henry went through before BATIM ended with him in Allison and Tom’s hideout…

…which means that, even if all the other messages on this particular wall were written by Joey, Audrey, and Wilson, Allison’s addition was most definitely not what made Loop 414 different, as the Memory of Joey seems to be implying. I’ll talk about my new theory on what did make Loop 414 different in a bit.

Now, if that part of the Memory of Joey’s story is untrue, then what if the Henry we meet in Wilson’s prison for Cyclebreakers is not a copy created to be tortured, he’s just been gaslit into believing he must be by the fact he’s survived for years without eating in his new ink body? So much so that he believes that maybe he should just give up on holding onto his human life and memories (translation: he's leaning on Joey's Illusion of Living coping mechanism, trying to create a reality that hurts less. Which, as I've said before, Nathan Sr. loves because it makes him easier to control)?

Henry: What's your name? Audrey: Audrey. What's yours? Henry: Honestly, I've almost forgotten. My name is Henry. Audrey: Have you been a prisoner long? Henry: When the Keepers think you're a threat to their plans, they lock you away, forever. Still, it's given me time to think. Things like: if you haven't eaten in years, you might not be human.

The Memory of Joey literally confessed that he doesn’t actually know if the Ink Dimension was created for revenge or regret, remember? So, why is he now suddenly claiming that he knows for sure that it was specifically created for this particular brand of substitutionary revenge?? Sure sounds like Nathan Sr.'s manipulative self-contradiction, again, doesn't it? I also find it extremely suspicious how this headline that seems to be confirming the retcon of Henry’s death…

…not only sounds nothing like a headline you would read in real life (except maybe in a trash tabloid or something, which this might be judging by some of the other headlines and would mean we shouldn't be trusting it to have done any fact checking rofl) – it sounds like something that a player (maybe one of JDS’s real-life beta testers, even) said during their playthrough, after hearing the Memory of Joey’s “retconning” story – but also… isn’t even properly capitalized or in any of the same fonts as the other headlines on this paper nor on the other we have! Especially considering the fact that one of these headlines is talking about the angry moon Easter egg you can spot in Lost Harbor, I don’t think this is actually a headline confirming that Henry’s not dead in the real world; I think it’s the observer’s (be that Audrey's or those of any other random ink creature who’s run into the Memory of Joey and/or “Fake Henry”) thoughts leaking into the wider reality of the Ink Dimension.

Oh, by the way, we do have evidence that either Henry or at least one of the other potential message writers, at one point, seemed to know our dear Mr. Animator was dead in the real world, also found in his cell in Allison and Tom’s hideout, if anyone who knew forgot.

I highly doubt it was referring to the message about Allison leaving him for dead, considering how he was awakened by her sounds of panic and would have no reason to still be in bed when Bendy arrived, even if not knowing about the secret toilet meant he didn’t escape Bendy the first time he experienced an Allison and Tom Loop. Funny that this is also where we see the evidence of Audrey existing in BATIM, by the way; hand with a swirl saying “follow me” and another swirl labelled “trust her,” as SuperHorrorBro on YouTube pointed out? Hm…

Let’s go back to her. It does seem we can trust parts of what the Memory of Joey says, like how we were able to glean clues as to what was going on behind the curtain through TIOL despite both the hoops that Joey had to jump through to get Nathan Sr.'s permission to publish in the first place and Nathan Sr.'s postmortem edits; you just gotta pay attention to the patterns in the broader picture. We do know, for example, from clues in BATIM, TIOL, and TLO, that whether or not he wanted anything to do with romance and having kids was a huge internal struggle for Joey that culminated in regret at missing the chance; which tells me that, yes, Joey created Audrey to be the daughter he could never have (speaking of which… based on the Keepers' “surgical invasions” comment, I wonder if Nathan Sr. might've… *clears throat* had someone forcibly sterilize Joey… ☹️). However, unlike many fans (including MatPat of Game Theory on YouTube, I saw this morning), I think Audrey has a completely new soul; Joey didn't sacrifice Henry's daughter or Tessa Arch or anything like that. Lemme explain.

Y’know how Audrey talks and behaves a lot like Henry (planning on drawing her animations all night long and actually doing so in the secret ending you unlock if you don’t make her move at the very beginning of the game, saying a lot of the same lines as him, etc.) and there’s an Easter egg where you can spot a ghost train on Platform 77 at 4:14am or 4:14pm (the same number as the loop that was different, Henry’s identifier in the Cyclebreaker prison, in the corner of the so-called “death of Henry retconning newspaper,” and the dates marked on so many lore drops… Anyone remember Nathan Sr. saying the last he heard from Joey, when he sounded so happy, was during April? I wonder if Audrey’s “birthday,” when Joey tried to cut ties with Nathan Sr. and disappear off his radar for good, was April 14… and mayhaps Nathan Sr. had the announcement of his buying the Bendy IP published and caused Wilson to discover the Ink Machine on April 14th as a way to poetically rub it all in Joey's face and dance on his grave)? There’s also another place that we can spot a ghost: when you make Audrey strike a pose in front of the mirror in her office too many times, like the goshdarned peacock that Joey was.

There are Lost One memos that say not only that ghosts are what happen when souls randomly, accidentally slip out of the Inkwell, but also that new souls can be created by combining old ones inside the Ink Machine…

“We don’t live forever. When we’re killed or finally pulled apart, our diseased souls return to the ink to be reborn. An unending cycle of torment. But sometimes, something even worse can happen. A soul can slip from the ink completely. It gets caught between worlds, unable to die or return. They wail in the night. Drifting in shadow. The Phantoms of the Machine. The ghosts.” ~ Unknown, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “The Ghosts” memo (emphasis added)

“We live in the ruins of the past. Forever lost in the shadows of those who came before us. Blended souls to make something new. Birthed from a machine into a world we cannot own. But the Ink Demon lives in all of us. A voice that calls us to a purpose. We know it’s a lie, but his intoxicating pull is strong. He is calling. Always calling. Can you not hear him?” ~ Unknown, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Who We Are” memo (emphasis added)

What if Audrey’s soul is a combination of pieces of Henry and Joey’s souls, so she’s Henry and Joey’s daughter, but none of the three of them realize it?? As far as Joey knows, she's only his own kid (because he knows with 100% certainty that he put a piece of his own soul inside of her), but the Arch family figured out what changed for Joey to finally succeed at creating life (by the way, I saw someone in some YouTube comment section point out a long time ago that, if you translate “414” to the alphabet, it spells “dad…” Wowzah, the symbolism)???

“I believe there’s something special in all of us. With true inner strength, you can conquer even your biggest challenges. You just have to believe in yourself and remain honest, motivated, and above all, who you really are. Okay, let’s stop it right there. I can only do so many takes of this trash a day. And tell the guys in writing I want more use of the word ‘dreaming’ in every message. Keep railing on that, get it? Dreaming! Dreaming! Dreaming! People just eat up that kind of slop. Hmm, what? It’s still on? Well, turn it off, damn it!” ~ Joey Drew, Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 4 (emphasis added)

The Memory of Joey: Well, geez! You haven't gotten far! Audrey: Don't do that! Wait… how… how did you get in here? The Memory of Joey: Oh, I have my ways. So, tell me. How goes the journey? Audrey: Slow, but I'll get through. The Memory of Joey: Ah! I see you have your father's never quit, go-getter spirit. Audrey: Oh, now you knew my father. Well, news flash! I didn't even know my father… or my mother. Or anyone else in my family. The Memory of Joey: I see then. You've chosen to forget the past. I can understand that. Audrey: What are you talking about? The Memory of Joey: Look, I don't think you're ready for this, *pats her hand* but hang on to your lunch money. There's something I want to show you. *Starts using his teleportation powers* Audrey: Wait. What are you doing? The Memory of Joey: *Teleports her and himself to BATIM Chapter 1* Henry's Voice (echoing like it's supposed to be a memory): Alright, Joey. I'm here. Let's see if we can find what you wanted me to see. . . . The Memory of Joey: …It was then, Joey decided to make something new. Something he had always wanted, but he could never have: a family. But not a cartoon one. Something real. And after many, many tries, he created something that made him happier than he ever could have imagined: a wonderful, loving daughter. Bright and kind. Almost human. He created you, Audrey. Audrey: What? Are you crazy? The Memory of Joey: Listen, I know it's a lot— Audrey: —Who do you think you are? I wasn't born from some… machine! I'm flesh and blood. I'm not some kind of ink monster. The Memory of Joey: Just because we're born of darkness, doesn't mean we belong to it. We're always free to choose. To believe what we want to believe. Audrey: Take me back! Right now! I'm not listening to any more of your lies! The Memory of Joey: Remember who you are, Audrey. *Tries to take her hand again* Audrey: *Yanks her hand away* Leave me alone! The Memory of Joey: *Sighs and sends her back to the Downside Hotel*

“This may be my last chance to record a message, I’m pretty sure he saw me talking into this thing, He probably won’t let me keep it. Not much left to say except… Linda, I miss you and I love you so much. Coming back to this old place well… it kind of reminds me of how much I’ve gained. I feel like there are so many questions that need answering, so many things that don’t make any sense. If anyone hears this, if you make it out, don’t ever return, because the Ink Demon will find you.” ~ Henry Stein, Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 5 teaser audio log #3 (emphasis added)

Audrey: Why would you be a threat to them? Henry: I'm what they call a “Cyclebreaker.” Once upon a time, I knew how to start the cycle over. And when that happens, everything begins again. Completely new. Obviously, Wilson and the Keepers don't want that to happen. Audrey: How did you do it? Henry: Reset the cycle? It turns out the Ink Demon himself is the key. This world is his, but even he must obey its rules. For now at least. If you can get him to look at something very specific, it will reset everything. Audrey: What is it? Henry: It's just a reel of film, labeled with the words “The End.” I can see it in my mind, every day. They keep it upstairs in the Pit [where Heidi says the ghosts live and nobody ever comes out of. At least, never quite the same]. Audrey: I'll see if I can break in and steal it. Maybe, if I reset the cycle, we can make things better for everyone here. Henry: And what about you? Audrey: I just wanna go home. Henry: So did I.

(*Side-eyes that “even Bendy must obey the rules” comment hard*)

Was Audrey created from Joey’s hatred of being what Nathan Sr. forced him to be, his coping mechanisms, and his desires for a family and to be his true self (which comes out in her as wanting to be a real human being of flesh and blood with a normal family, even if that means she has to forget her real family), and Henry’s kindness, curiosity, compassion, perseverance, passion and talent for drawing, and desire to go back home to his family? Joey says in TIOL that he admired Henry’s smile, and I noted in my original analysis/theory that Joey’s smiles that people find unsettling don’t seem to be a sign of malice but instead that he’s going through some sort of suffering, usually related to Nathan Sr., that’s causing him to dissociate just like Bill from TLO does, so of course the newest Audrey’s smile – Henry’s genuine, kind, confident smile – would fill Joey’s heart with joy!!

“Who would have ever dreamed? In the declining years of my life, I have someone more precious to me than any piece of art I could make. When she laughs and smiles, it fills my heart so much it overflows. For all the evil that’s come from me, this is something finally good. We play and talk as we both learn from each other. There’s not much time so every moment has to count. Unlike my versions that came before her, the ones who called me their ‘uncle,’ I’m proud to have her call me ‘Dad.’ Because she is truly my daughter.” ~ Joey Drew, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “True Daughter” memo (emphasis added)

Before anyone says anything, it's for the very same aforementioned “broader pattern” reasons that I'm unconvinced Joey's motivations behind having the previous (implied “imperfect,” which I agree with others could mean “unable to live very long in the real world,” explaining in addition to Joey being very old and sickly the extreme focus on not having much time 😢💔) versions of her call him “Uncle Joey” were as selfish and cruel as they seemed. I feel like it was simply, once again, a way to cope with grief, as he does so often (and Audrey seems to have done generational trauma-style, once again, “choosing to forget” rather than mourning)… I think, in reality, he didn't mean that the other Audreys weren't good enough to call him “Dad,” but that he couldn't bear to have them call him “Dad” because he could tell they'd be gone soon and he needed that fact to hurt less, his thought process something like “of course I still care about my nieces, but losing them is less utterly devastating.”

Speaking of the memories, was anyone else weirded out by the way Wilson said that Nathan Sr. “only ever had time for the grand creatives of the world. The ‘doers,’ as he called them. How could his lowly son ever compete,” after that conspicuous comment from Nathan Sr. that he dislikes creative people, back in TIOL (I specifically noted this comment in my original analysis/theory because it sounded like he was indirectly ending his relationships with every other creative he's ever met specifically so that nobody would believe anyone who claims he looked down upon Joey)? And was anyone else disturbed by the fact that, in the very same room where Wilson went on his rant about how Nathan Sr. was beyond saving (definitely didn't sound like he meant physically 😬👿) before he got freaking shredded (still not over it 😵‍), we find a hotdog connected to Audrey's pleasant childhood with Joey and a final Nathan Sr. audio log where he talks about going on a lovely walk and eating a hotdog for the first time in a long time (no, this isn't implying that the memories are actually Wilson's; the achievement for getting them all is called “Self Discovery.” And, sorry MattyPatty, but I'm not buying “they're Tessa's because the Fashionable Men's Hat was in fashion in the 1930s but not the 1960s;” I didn't know or care what was actually considered fashionable as a little girl – I mean, I still don't, but I'm autistic and that's beside the point – I even called old clothes of my grandmothers' that they gave me to play dress-up with “fashionable/chic/etc.” If I was pretending to be fashionable, I could tell it was expensive, and/or I thought someone – especially my parents – looked good in something, I called it such things without question. Multiple memories make a point of saying how old and/or cheap they are, the Rubber Duck straight-up saying that it was “still dusted with the decay of old soap;” it sounds to me like Joey kept a lot of old/broken things in order to save money and possibly also go out in public as little as possible in order to stay off Nathan Sr.'s radar, his biggest exceptions being making memories with his baby girl)?

“I decided to go for a walk this morning. Took a little stroll down to the park. Enjoyed the warm sun for a while, found a quiet bench, even grabbed a hot dog. It's been ages since I've done that. Tessa would kill me if she knew I've been off my diet. When I got back to the office, I stopped by the animation department and said hello to the troops. My gosh, they're getting younger every day. Either that or I'm just getting older. It all made me realize time is moving on. The hard struggles don't seem as dire as they used to. Life has other value. I think, I'll go home early today. Maybe I'll even pick up a hot dog for Tessa.” ~ Nathan Arch Sr., Bendy and the Dark Revival, “The Bigger Things” audio log

Just this one scene in this one room felt like a big, flashing neon sign highlighting the stark contrast between Nathan Sr. and Joey's parenting. So much here is screaming to me that:

Nathan Sr. – who seems to have just chosen to be a monster of his own, perfectly sane and untraumatized free will – had been working hard to make observers believe he was a good father while neglecting The Favorite Son™ (Nathan Jr.) and abusing The Hated Bastard Son™ (Wilson) so horribly both emotionally and physically that not only was Wilson jealous of how much his dad liked people he just disliked and/or of anyone who got his dad's attention and approval by being used in his machinations, but he was also made into a social pariah (just like Walter and Joey) by the horrific injuries his father inflicted on him, making him look and sound so creepy. I think Nathan Sr. was relieved that day in 1973 when his intricate plans finally came to the fruition he was actually planning on and they found his least favorite son's dead body on the floor of his JDS museum; the hotdogs were a way to celebrate finally ridding himself and Tessa of Wilson for good (seriously, frick you, Nathan Sr. I'mma slug you and then hug and adopt both your sons; nobody deserves a dad as pure evil as you).

Joey – who was clearly forced to be the way he was for survival reasons – really, genuinely was trying to be a good uncle/dad to the Audreys, despite the mistakes he definitely made with them due to decades of being trapped in survival mode (and Audrey definitely loved him despite his flaws, which is probably why she's so willing to give Wilson a chance! Anyone notice the description of the Cracked Mug childhood memory? I… why are you making me tear up over a broken cup with a frowny face drawn on it?? Stop making me cry… 😭😭😭 Not only was Wilson trying to communicate what happened to him to her, but he was successful and she sees her dad in him and wants to help… Unfortunately, he ain't in the same place Joey was, anymore. His dad's Murder Puppet process worked, just as he feared; he's not the same person now as when he wrote The Mug and the Maiden, so she gets hurt for her kindness). He didn't want her to become like him, he wanted her to be safer and better able to move forward than he was, as seen in the memos signed “your best pal;” he fought for his daughter to not just survive, but joyfully thrive, taking her out for hotdogs just so that they could relax together on a Saturday.

“Every great story begins in mystery. Although things may be dark at the start, the truth will illuminate your way. Don’t be afraid of who you are. Fear only what you may become, and banish it away.” ~ “Your Best Pal” (heavily implied Bendy/Real Joey), Bendy and the Dark Revival, “The Beginning” and “Something Familiar” memos (emphasis added)

(The “Something Familiar” copy is literally found on the Memory of Joey’s bed which, as I said in Part Two, I think was actually Dapper Bendy’s.)

“Around here, it's just best to stay out of sight. Don't ever go running into some place if you don't know what's in there! If you attack a problem head on, you're going to find yourself in trouble. And that's just foolish! You gotta watch, listen, and when the time is right, push forward.” ~ “Your Best Pal” (heavily implied Bendy/Real Joey), Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Be Careful” memo

“Don't ever lose hope. When in doubt, the answer you seek is usually nearby. We all have dreams, ghosts in our past. But those ghosts can give us the path forward.” ~ “Your Best Pal” (heavily implied Bendy/Real Joey), Bendy and the Dark Revival, “White Rabbit” memo (emphasis added)

Back to the whole soul blending idea. If I'm right, this would all explain:

Why our Audrey could survive in the real world while the others couldn’t: they needed complete souls, but they only had part of Joey’s soul until part of Henry's escaped!!

What made Loop 414 different: Henry’s memories of the previous loops were erased because part of his soul had (genuinely, cause Joey seemed awfully surprised that something changed) accidentally slipped into the newest Audrey!!

The Memory of Joey saying A: that Audrey doesn’t have to be the Ink Demon anymore, making a big deal about how Audrey’s real and loved – the Ink Demon has the rest of Joey’s soul, he’s saying that she’s her own person and not either of her dads (while also making Joey sound like a selfish creep by passive-aggressively rubbing the fact that he was forced to be the monster he became in Real Joey’s face and also telling him that he’s unlovable trash unlike Audrey *stares at my notes on how Susie Campbell/Twisted Alice’s story parallels Joseph Dempsey/Joey Drew’s, again* but seeming like he's being a jerkwad to another one of his children, as @inkdemonapologist pointed out. So many reasons for Bendy to have crushed the life out of him, there) – and B: “just a pencil and a dream isn’t enough, you have to have heart” – not only does she need to keep choosing compassion to avoid going down the road Joey did, but Joey was The Dreamer, Henry was The Heart, and together they made a separate life!!

Why Wilson would A: describe Audrey's powers as “devilish” (they came partly from Joey, who is now the Ink Demon) and make a big deal about how the Ink Demon can't get into his lab (he knew that Bendy/Real Joey would 100% come to rescue his baby girl, if they were somewhere he was capable of entering. As he did at the end of the Shipahoy Wilson fight), and B: think that her soul would be powerful enough to create a deity that could defeat Bendy (she's also a descendant of the Third King of JDS, who left the kingdom) while also, apparently, not realizing that his own soul might be powerful enough, as well, and therefore never actually trying to kill Bendy himself (he tried to have his Keepers do it, remember? That's literally what those audio logs were all about); maybe this is how souls always work in the Bendyverse – everyone's souls are a combination of pieces of their parents', so Wilson's soul is partly Nathan Sr.'s, another one of the Three Kings of JDS (this might also explain why Henry, the Memory of Joey, Audrey, and Wilson are the only ink creatures we see who resemble humans; if the Memory of Joey is actually Nathan Sr., that means they all have Royal Souls, making them the most powerful beings in the Ink Dimension. Bendy/Real Joey is probably the way he is because A: he chose to be, B: Nathan Sr. forced him to be, or C: nobody had any choice in the matter because he was already bonded to the soulless Bendy body by the failed ritual performed way back in 1946) – but, as far as he knows, it only works that way for ink creatures…?

“Now I’m not lookin’ for trouble. It’s just the nature of us projectionists to seek out the dark places. You see, I’ve learned the ins and outs of this here studio. I know how to avoid being bothered by the likes of this… company. ‘That projectionist,’ they always say, ‘creeping around, he’s just lookin’ for trouble.’ Well trouble or not, I sees everything. They don’t even know when I’m watchin’. Even when I’m right behind ‘em.” ~ Norman Polk, Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 3 (emphasis added)

“‘Of course,’ Norman said to himself. He took another sip [of what was almost definitely ink]. ‘He says it like that, knowing that he's the one who brought this creature upon us. Of course. Of course.’ I felt cold then, like the temperature had dropped and it was winter. Like if I talked my breath would freeze. ‘What do you mean?’ But I knew what he meant. He meant the infirmary. The thing in the room with the locked door. The door I'd opened. I'd let it out. Me. It was all my fault. ‘What do you two know about the ink?’ Norman asked instead. ‘We know Sammy is obsessed with it,’ said Dot. ‘So not much then,’ said Norman. ‘How much do you know?’ I asked, trying to hold it together. ‘Everything.’” ~ Daniel “Buddy” Lewek, Dreams Come to Life, pg. 210-211 (emphasis added)

“I'm a fan of darkness. It just appeals to me. As old Norman would often say: people really become themselves when they're hidden in shadow. That creepy guy always had a story to tell about this place. But I think I've found a few narrow passages even he didn't know about. I can watch. I can listen. I can even steal. And no one ever sees me. I'm just a ghost, *giggles giddily* living in the walls, peering from the darkness. *Chuckles ominously*” ~ Grace Conway, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Dark Places” audio log (emphasis added)

Is Grace a combination of Norman and somebody else's souls (someone who's not at all in denial that they enjoy getting into mischief and ruffling people's feathers, clearly… roflolol what if it's Shawn?? What if him leaving JDS was also one of Nathan Sr.'s lies, so he really was the Top Hat Searcher Boss in BATIM??? Omigosh, I wanna meet Grace, she sounds fun 🤣 but also, poor Shawn 🥺), so just as much his daughter as Audrey is Henry and Joey's? Was she created from his desire to find secrets? She has a very similar voice to him and everything, goodness. And while we're back on the subject of dear old Norman, could he have become a personification of part of Wilson's psyche when he got addicted to that same ink that Sammy did (which would also support my “Wilson's not actually the ‘new evil’ in the Ink Dimension, it's Nathan Sr.'s soul” theory)…? Wilson seems to have a Royal Soul, after all; maybe that gave him the ability to work himself into the hivemind that thoroughly… “Wilson's always watching. He knows your purpose…”

Speaking of which, it sure looks to me like we got a whole heckuva lotta “Joey's the center of the hivemind and anyone infected with the right kind of ink becomes a personification of part of his psyche (otherwise, they just send/receive thoughts to/from him)” confirmation, besides that second paragraph of the “Who We Are” memo (especially if Porter really is Brant; he assisted us in escaping Freaky Teeth alongside all the freed Cyclebreakers in the end, I highly doubt he betrayed us).

“A new terror has descended into our lives: This man named Wilson. Ever since, our world feels strained, like a great beast held in chains. The Ink Demon hasn't been seen in a long time. Many of us refuse to believe he's really gone. But what does it matter? Down here, we're all sinners. Children of the Machine all have the Demon in our inky blood.” ~ Unknown, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Beast in Chains” memo (emphasis added)

“His eyes see all. His claws tear and thrash. His whispers turn your mind into dark, unspeakable trash. Listen for the heartbeat drone. Your doom is close at hand. The Ink Demon is both beast and lord. His powers, too vast for us to understand. Death is fast. Death is near. His reign will last beyond your fear.” ~ Unknown, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Lament” memo (emphasis added)

“The Dark Puddles awaken. A voice, a soul. The ink speaks to me. It whispers your secrets. Who are you? Tell me your sweet name, that I may devour it. My ink swells and boils. It consumes. I am the Ink Demon. This realm is mine. You were born from it. You belong to it. You cannot hide forever. I will find you. (After telling Porter her name) The deep abyss remembers you, Audrey. A child of the darkness.” ~ The Ink Demon, Bendy and the Dark Revival, ch. 2 (emphasis added)

(Anyone notice the implication there that not only does the very fact that Bendy can hear Audrey’s thoughts mean she has a soul, but also that the very fact that we can hear Bendy’s thoughts must mean he also has a soul inside of him now, by the way?)

“I see your mind as the truth unfolds. You will accept your fate before the end.” ~ The Ink Demon, Bendy and the Dark Revival, ch. 4 (emphasis added)

Wilson: The Demon's evil continues to spread. This world has began to shutter… The Ink Demon (literally interrupting her conversation with Wilson telepathically): He’s lying, Audrey. Audrey (whisper-shouting): Be quiet! Wilson: What did you say? Audrey: Nothing. It was nothing. Wilson: Hm. *Opens door to security checkpoint* Just a quick stop. Won't take but a moment.

Did Susie/Alice not mean that Bendy killed her, but that she knew Joey was the center of the hivemind, back in BATIM? And if so, did she find a way to cut herself off from him or did his power just become stronger when his human body died and his soul finally merged with his ink one, I wonder? It seems like people could only fully hear others' voices in their heads in BATDR; before that, you had to actually be inside the inkwell or else people's thoughts just popped into your head as if they were your own…

“*Alice voice* …Take this little freak for instance! He crawled in here… Trailing his tainted ink to my door! It could have touched me! It could have pulled me *Susie voice* back!! Do you know what it's like? Living in the dark puddles? *Alice voice* It's a buzzing, screaming well of voices! *Susie voice* Bits of your mind, swimming… like… like fish in a bowl! *Alice voice* The first time I was born from its' inky womb, I was a wriggling, pussing, shapeless slug. The second time… well… *Susie voice* It made me an angel! I will not let the demon touch me again. I'm so close now. So… almost perfect… *Dreamy sigh*” ~ Susie Campbell/Twisted Alice, Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 3 (emphasis added)

Back to the soul children thing. I wonder if even Alan/Allen Gray/Grey (who can't even spell his name consistently. Yes, I'm mad about it. Jiminy Christmas, my guy) could be one of these “children of the darkness/Machine,” born of its ghosts?

“So we're looking at quite the job here! Walls come out, pipes go in… dang walls go back in again! It's like banging your head on a rock over and over and over. The first time, it hurts to heck. The hundredth time, well… you just don't think much about it. That's what it's like working for Mr. Joey Drew. At first you feel that bad pain in your gut that you're doing something very wrong. But after a time, when the dust settles, and Joey has played his cards, you just learn to go with it. Bit of your soul dies with each pipe you put in.” ~ Thomas Connor, Bendy and the Dark Revival, teaser audio log dated November 12th, 1943 (emphasis added)

“‘I'm not leaving until I get what's mine,’ Tom said as Mister Drew stared him down. . . . ‘I want my patent back,’ Tom said right to Mister Drew's face. They were practically nose-to-nose. Or more like, nose-to-chin. . . . ‘It's my machine, Drew, it's mine.’” ~ Daniel “Buddy” Lewek, Dreams Come to Life, pg. 247 and 248 (emphasis added)

“Joey, Sorry, it's been a while since my last letter. Been Busy with work at Archgate Films. The Studio ordered another sequel! So I have been spending many hours in the recording booth again! It's fun though. Tom is doing good, thanks for asking. He's always tinkering or something. Mostly he's still upset about someone stealing one of his dusty inventions from your old studio. He'll get over it. Have a good New Year, Joey. I'll send you another recipe soon. Warm Regards,” ~ Allison Connor (formerly Pendle), Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 5 (emphasis added)

(No, Allison, I don't believe he ever will get over it, rofl.)

“To Grant Cohen, accounting: Please inform Mr. Drew that despite his insistence that the rumors of Joey Drew Studios going bankrupt are untrue, I want to remind him that if his studio does indeed fail, all equipment and experiments produced through our partnership, by contract, belong to the Gent Corporation. We will reclaim these assets forcibly if necessary.” ~ Alan/Allen Gray/Grey (he spells his name “Alan Gray,” here), Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Gent Property” memo (emphasis added)

Could he be a combination of Tom and somebody else's souls (someone more privileged, with money, power, and a college education… Could be Allison, I guess… but also maybe Bertrum, or Nathan Sr…? Something tells me that ghosts gravitate towards ghosts who complement/complete the part of their parent that they embody to form new souls with), so actually his son, created from his desire to get his effing inventions out of JDS's hands (there's that very specific technicality I mentioned, back in Part Two), and perhaps altered by Nathan Sr. to create a new villain to distract us from himself (he's clearly not against doing that to his own sons, so… Also, this would support my “Wilson's not actually the ‘new evil’ in the Ink Dimension, it's Nathan Sr.'s soul” theory, too… The Memory of Joey was the one who retrieved the End Reel from the Pit, by the way. Remember? Audrey never gets to go inside)?

“We've hit rock bottom. No doubt about it. By all accounts, I don't even know how this studio is still going at all. If you follow the money, you just hit a big old brick wall! Well, let me tell you, blank ledgers, spare cash, Weird amounts that plain just don't add up. There's still income finding its way onto the books, but for the life of me, I can't figure out where it's all coming from. Though the obvious answer is that Gent is privately pouring in some funds. And truth be told, they really creep me out. Especially that Mister Gray. He doesn't seem to be motivated by money, and he sure as heck ain't telling us what he's REALLY after. You just can't trust someone like that.” ~ Grant Cohen, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Strange Money” audio log (emphasis added)

Something tells me we shouldn't be looking at the obvious answer. I can think of someone else right off the bat who “sure as heck ain't telling us what he's REALLY after” and we know for a fact that Joey has audibly nervously begged for money from, before…

“It’s been quite a struggle to put this into words, Nathan. After so many years, you know I’d never ask unless it was dire. But when a man’s in a spot, he should call upon his friends. Truth is… well, the studio is… *slight tremor in voice* coming up a little short. Hit a few unexpected bumps. If you could… lend us the amount I mentioned in my last letter *inhale* it would be a big help to me… Hope this reaches you in South America. You and Tessa enjoy your vacation.” ~ Joey Drew, Boris and the Dark Survival

…and I think we just figured out what Mr. Gray/Grey's true motivations are by figuring out where they came from… Could being the second of Audrey's kind, “born of ink but living in flesh,” be why he seems to understand how to make things cross dimensions…??

“The future has arrived. I just didn't know it would get here so soon. Some of the stuff that's coming out of Gent doesn't follow any of the rules of physics that I know. Hard to believe they started out as a brick laying company once upon a time. Nowadays, we have all the modern conveniences and, worse yet, the headaches. Take that ID Card machine they've got at the door. You don't bring your ID, you ain't gettin’ to work. So I started putting my ID Card on my nightstand in my room at the Downside Hotel. It's not the safest place, but at least I know where it is.” ~ Eugene Lloyd, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Daily Headache” memo (emphasis added)

Y'know, I find it incredibly suspicious how one of the secret endings reveals Audrey to be in an insane asylum, unlocked if you collect all the copies of TIOL (the biggest source of info on Nathan Sr.'s abusiveness towards Joey) that are scattered around the studio and then staring into the colored ink in Wilson's (the biggest source of info on Nathan Sr.'s machinations) lab. They're clearly tryna nudge us towards thinking Audrey might be a fan with an unhealthy parasocial relationship with Joey (the achievement for unlocking it is titled “The Insane Reader”)… but how many times have I said that anyone who might be an info leak or even just displeases Nathan Sr. seems to get disappeared mafia-style? What better way, if she couldn't be trapped in the Ink Dimension with everyone else, to simultaneously silence and torment Joey's only family member than by fabricating a different, more believable life story for her and getting her committed?

I wonder how many of the many more audio logs/memos/etc. there are in this version of the studio – many of which seem outlandish and surreal even in the context of the rest of the series – may have also been made up by the souls of the series' scapegoats/etc. in attempt to call our attention to the discrepancies and reveal the truths?

“Something funny's going on around here. Call me suspicious if you wanna, but I know the signs of weirdness when I see ‘em. Don't get me wrong, we've always had visitors around the studio, but lately we're getting just one kind of visitor in particular: Gent Corporation Employees. Tons of ‘em. They're working in the hallways, ripping up the floors, taking the best toilets, you can't even get near the Little Devil Lounge these days! It's starting to feel less like an animation studio around here, and more and more like some crazy scientist's laboratory. It's just plain weirdness.” ~ Lance Derby, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Weirdness” audio log (emphasis added)

(Hm… Sounds an awful lot like Constance's comment on the potential dangers of “innocuous strangeness” I brought up in Part Two… 👀)

“This old town [Lost Harbor?] really has changed ever since that big Gent Building went up. Yesterday, I took a trip over to the Farmer's Market, and they had the whole dang street ripped up! It was like a large hole had just plain swallowed the sidewalk. Men were going in and out with strange iron tools. Kind of looked like they were installing some kind of tunnel under the road. Pipes just everywhere! Pete behind the produce counter was just shaking his head. ‘They're up to no good,’ he kept sayin’. ‘You'll see. This is how it always starts.’ I think old Pete might be right. But I don't like to dismiss people just on rumors. Only time will tell, I suppose.” ~ Kitty Thompson, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Trouble Town” audio log (emphasis added)

“I heard some of the workers from down the hall last night talking about storming Joey Drew's office. They were using some colorful language, banging their fists on the tables and chairs. It was the same bunch who whistled at me yesterday. Things must be getting serious. That accountant, Grant Cohen, just walks from his desk down to the men's room and back all day. Over and over again, gripping his stomach. Kind of green in the gills. I can't tell if something he ate isn't agreeing with him, or if he just can't take the pressure anymore. Joey's got a plan, he keeps saying, Gent is making something special. I really hope he's right. I may just be a secretary, but this place has a magic I don't want to see end.” ~ Sally Newt, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Getting Serious” memo (emphasis added)

Are the children of the Machine straight-up trying to tell us that A: Nathan Sr. is (genuinely) editing Mr. Gray/Grey into the story as yet another one of his many Decoy Villains for us to hate and pursue instead of him, B: in real-life, Grant was infected with ink (as the audio log in the version of his office in BATIM suggests he was) in order to disappear him for figuring out what Nathan Sr. was doing through the financial records, and C: Joey meant for the Ink Dimension to be salvation for people like Grant (like I suggested in Part Two)?? Wow…

While I'm still on the subject, I think I might know who a couple of other characters are the soul children of. I think Steve is the son of Wally and Tom, and Heidi is the daughter of Allison and Susie (sorry, SuperHorrorBro, but I don't believe Porter and Heidi are previous Audrey versions. Besides the “Who We Are” memo spelling out what “child of the darkness/Machine” actually means, the “True Daughter” memo implies that all of Joey's previous attempts at creating a child were daughters, Porter would be a son and Bendy calling Audrey “the daughter of Drew” as if there's genuinely only one – why the actual heck would he say that if he's not Real Joey and considers himself “one of the children of Drew?” Shouldn't he be giving his sister Heidi the same honor he, himself, wants but was denied, just like she was? That doesn't make sense, which Wilson explains to us is a sign that something was Nathan Sr.'s doing in some way – along with the way Audrey and Betty talk about Betty being “one in a long line of failed experiments” as if Wilson continuing to try and get her to come out the way she was supposed to is a good thing that's going to positively impact her eventually implies that all the Audreys were the same piece of Joey's soul reincarnated. Also, Porter says that he “learned” his powers, and there was a delay between the hivemind speaking to Audrey and her using her default powers for the first time, but zero delay between Porter and Heidi giving her their powers [which Porter does by taking Audrey’s hand like the Memory of Joey does when trying to get her to accept the entire so-called “retconning story” as truth, and Heidi does by touching Audrey’s face like the Memory of Joey does when using his teleportation powers on her, which suggests that this was how they were given to them…] and her using them. I think that A: the Memory of Joey gave Porter and Heidi their powers to push us towards believing that Real Joey was a cruel uncle/father who discarded the failed Audreys when he got sick of taking care of them [I wonder… could Porter's seemingly randomly dubbing Audrey “Bobby,” leading her to describe their interaction as “weird” – which can be another sign of Nathan Sr.’s interference or a sign of Wilson's warning riddles – was a message from Wilson, trying to highlight both his dad's “Fake Siblings” plan and the fact that Audrey's desire to be a normal human stems from Joey's desire to be his true self rather than the monster that Nathan Sr. forced him to be? 👀👀 And, by the way, did anyone notice that Porter, Heidi, and the Memory of Joey's powers are all travel-based?? 👀👀👀 Sounds to me like the Memory of Joey meant it when he said he has his “ways,” plural], B: Audrey just had her default powers automatically because she has a Royal Soul, but they didn't awaken until she wanted them [no, not “needed.” That Searcher outright tells us we don't need to kill them and, from my and my brother's playthrough, you can literally play your whole game without them ever leaving that spot, even if you fight Lost Ones right next to them. I think this moment is further symbolism for Audrey leaning on her dad's coping mechanisms generational trauma-style and the fact we actually do have a choice between cruelty and compassion], and C: Audrey, herself, as a benevolent ruler, is considered a gift from the two main users of the hivemind/Dark Puddles – Wilson and Bendy/Real Joey – by many inhabitants of the Ink Dimension. “And from the hallowed darkness, from the wretched abyss, a savior comes at last,” as Wilson says), created from their playful, lovey-dovey sides…

“These guys down at the warehouse get to play games all day while I'm stuck cleaning up after ‘em. They keep locking themselves out of their own back room. So I says to ‘em, ‘look guys,’ I says, ‘you're smart, right? Here's an idea! Why not rig these games to knock open the door if ya win? It'll be fun for you guys, and it saves me the trip down here every day.’ They went for it like a dog to pot roast. I tell ya! If these guys don't start realizing who the real genius is, I'm outta here.” ~ Wally Franks, Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 4

“So here we are! Another big day at Joey Drew Studios! Lot more people running around here these days. But for me, it's the same old dirty floors they've always been! Just more feet messing them up now! The only [new] feet I don't mind tromping around here are Miss Campbell's. She's good to me! I'll make sure I empty her garbage every day just to see how she's doing. Speaking of which, I heard her talking with Sammy the other day. If I didn't know better, I'd say there was magic there. But who am I to judge? I think they saw me looking though… So I just tipped my hat and said: ‘See you later!’ … ‘I'm outta here!’” ~ Wally Franks, Bendy and the Dark Revival teaser audio log dated March 5th, 1933 (emphasis added)

“I thought of Mr. Connor. Gruff, rough-around-the-edges Mr. Connor. Was he the manager? I thought he was, but he couldn't be, could he? Not if this elegant creature was the manager's partner.” ~ Bill Chambers, Bendy: The Lost Ones, pg. 204 (emphasis added)

“‘We aren't in your studio right now, are we?’ replied Tom. There was no way Mister Drew could physically intimidate this man. Tom wasn't burly and bear-like like Bertrum Piedmont. He was more wall-like. Still Mister Drew grabbed him by the elbow and through clenched teeth said: ‘The hallway. Now.’ ‘Come on, Tom, no need to make a scene,’ said Allison with a warm voice, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. Tom allowed them to escort him to the pink lobby…” ~ Daniel “Buddy” Lewek, Dreams Come to Life, pg. 247-248 (emphasis added)

“First week on the job at the Gent Workshop, and I can tell already this'll be interestin’. ‘Think you can lift this still girder?’ they asked me with a smug smile. I didn't even bother to answer. Just picked the whole thing up with one hand. You should have see the wee men drop their jaws. All in all, I've noticed this building just ain't built for someone my size. Every time I walk by the workshop shelves, the tools all fall to the floor. That and I gotta bend down for every doorway in the place. Still, there are some positives to workin’ here. Take that new secretary, the shy little one with the blonde locks, the one who follows around Mister Gray. I'm pretty sure she's been giving me and my muscles the eye. But I ain't no smooth talker. A work-worn man such as myself, ain't got no business with a woman that fine.” ~ Steve McGregor, Bendy and the Dark Revival, “New Job” audio log

“Allison just smiled her dazzling smile that made me melt a little, even though the scene was making me incredibly tense. ‘We'll talk about that in the morning, Joey. Come on, dear.’ She gave Tom a little push on his shoulder, and evidently she could move mountains because once again he gave in and took a step back.” ~ Daniel “Buddy” Lewek, Dreams Come to Life, pg. 248 (emphasis added)

“Who would've thought? Me having lunch with Joey Drew! Apparently times are tougher than I thought. For a moment there, I though I'd be stuck with the check. But I gotta say, he wasn't at all what I expected. Quite the charmer. He even called me Alice. I liked it.” ~ Susie Campbell, Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 3 (emphasis added)

“So turns out it's my lucky day! I got to cleaning some of the offices around 2 am last night. And what do ya think I find on one of the chairs? A big freaking chocolate cake. Just sitting there! Practically yelling my name! You know, I work hard! I earn my pay. Every darn dollar. But you know what this company's missing? Little, benefiting perks. And this here cake? It's a perk! Hopefully no one finds out what I done. Cause if they did, I can tell ya what would happen. I'm outta here.” ~ Wally Franks, Bendy and the Ink Machine, ch. 5 (emphasis added)

“The Keepers have taken my friend! Locked him away like some animal! Just cause he's big and strong. But they don't need to fear him! No! If they just make sure to feed him on time, Big Steve won't ever hurt a fly! He loves the food from the ‘Little Devil Lounge’ best. If only someone would take the long road back through the sewers, climb up the elevator shaft, and seek out his favorite thumping delicacy. Then they would see how harmless he really is!” ~ Unknown (heavily implied Heidi), Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Feeding Time” memo

“*Alice voice* …But for now, let's have fun. Plenty of time for a bloodbath later. Ooh! How about a game? Let's all play a game of riddles! *Susie voice* Riddles? *Gasps* Oh, what a wonderful idea!” ~ Susie Campbell/Twisted Alice, Bendy and the Dark Revival, ch. 5 (emphasis added)

“But… but first! May we play a game? Oh, I love to play games! I like hide and seek best.” ~ Heidi, Bendy and the Dark Revival, ch. 4

(…Anyone notice this ink message we see right before we hear Freaky Teeth Bendy's voice for the first time? 👀)

My gosh, no wonder Heidi and Steve are so flipping cute (I may actually have a new romantic ship, that's rare for me), roflol. Also, remember what I said about ghosts gravitating to ghosts who complement/complete the part of their parent they embody to form new souls with? *Stares at my notes on how it seems like Nathan Sr. was secretly driving a wedge between Tom and Wally the exact same way he secretly drove a wedge between Henry and Joey: through lies and sabotage* Something tells me that Nathan Sr. could tell our dear Mr. Inventor and Mr. Janitor would be a good team and too difficult to control if he allowed them to get along.

Anyways, now that I'm excitedly vibrating over all those prospects, let's return our focus to Allison's so-called “story retcon.” I really, really, really dislike how the Memory of Joey seems to be trying to convince us that one of the most critical pieces in noticing the similarities between the story of Joey, Allison, and Susie and the story of Walter, Arthur, and Isabel, and therefore in arousing suspicion that Nathan Sr. had orchestrated both situations was never involved in any of the previous stories she appears in at all except for BATIM, specifically, in a completely different way as just a character that Joey edited in decades after the fact, based on someone he'd just recently met; that's suspicious as heck and very reminiscent of Nathan Sr.'s erasure of Lottie's existence in TIOL. And, especially after my further thoughts on TLO inspired by The Mug and the Maiden, I wonder if not only was I right about Henry being murdered to punish Joey for contacting him (and him for responding like the good friend he is), but there's also another story that hadn't occurred to me despite noticing that Allison seemed to have started waking up from Nathan Sr.'s trance in between DCTL and TLO… Did Allison and Tom also get murdered, as punishment for Allison's deciding to try and be a proper friend to Joey rather than continuing to be Nathan Sr.'s pawn in the aftermath of Henry's murder (I wouldn't be surprised if it was straight-up the last straw for her… Nathan Sr. certainly could've used her as a spy in whatever other animation studio he worked at after he left JDS when he realized Joey was thinking about calling him for help, so maybe she knew Henry and liked him like everyone else – minus Nathan Sr. lol – who knew him seemed to… Now, he was gone, and she was just as devastated as Joey)?? Was she, indeed, able to see the good in Joey that even he couldn't see (because he was being eaten alive by guilt in his old age), as a fellow reformed abuse-victim-turned-abuser (when I first read DCTL and TIOL, not yet having read TLO, I thought the way she said “we’ll talk about that in the morning, Joey,” when he tried to fire her sounded like she knew full well about the true nature of her Pretend Boss and True Boss' relationship and really meant “we'll talk after Nathan Sr. puts you in your place, tonight…” Maybe I was right 😬)? She certainly tried to do that for Susie Campbell/Twisted Alice…

“Dear Alice, I don't know if you will read these notes, but I'll keep leaving them for you. I hope someday you'll understand my words and the madness will fade from your mind. In this strange and dark place, we can find light and purpose. We are not left to just wander alone, craving beauty, power, and other meaningless things. Even the heart of someone feeling incomplete, can discover joy. We're not lost. We're merely waiting to be found. We are so much alike. Formed from the same mold. We're like sisters, you and me. I wish you comfort and the wisdom to let your heart melt into happiness. I won't give up trying to reach you before it's too late.” ~ “A Friend” (heavily implied Allison Angel), Bendy and the Dark Revival, “Two of a Kind” memo

…so why not for Joseph Dempsey/Joey Drew? In fact, why not for Wilson, yet another abuse-victim-turned-abuser?

Allison: Are you crazy? Wilson's our enemy. Audrey: Do you even know him? Have you even talked to him? Allison: I've seen what he's done. That's good enough for me. Audrey: Look, it sounds like he has a plan to kill the Ink Demon. I think he can help us all! I just… I just need to go back and hear him out. Allison: Well, if it's true. You'll both need as much help as you can get. The Ink Demon won't go down without a fight. Tom and I will gather some of our friends. Anyone who's left. Good luck, Audrey. Audrey: Thank you, Allison.

This is turning out to be quite the support group, ain't it? Also, hm, sounds familiar, again…

“That big question. Why? The biggest of all the ‘W’ questions, I have found over my years, and often the hardest to answer. Especially when the why disguises itself as something else.” ~ Joey Drew, The Illusion of Living, pg. 21 (emphasis added)

“‘What?’ The most used of the ‘W’ questions, and I think the most useless…” ~ Joey Drew, The Illusion of Living, pg. 33

Speaking of which, it makes zero sense for “Cyclebreaker” to mean “someone who's capable of resetting the loop” as Henry claims when the Memory of Joey specifically said that Wilson, in preventing the resets, was “freezing the cycle.” The time loop cycle is supposed to keep resetting, that's literally the entire reason it's called a “cycle.” Why would all of these characters be potential cycle reset-ers in the way Henry says, anyways? Bertrum's ink form doesn't even have legs or hands like Henry, Sammy, Susie, and Norman's do; he can't even leave where he's supposed to be without being subjected to destructive force like he apparently was in order to remove his head from the octopus ride and put him in the Cyclebreaker prison, forget playing the End Reel. Y'know what all the Cyclebreakers do have in common, if my theories are correct? They could've broken that other cycle I mentioned in my original analysis/theory: Sammy, Susie, and Bertrum all became personifications of different parts of Joey's psyche and by extension are symbolic of how trauma often causes people to cause the same trauma in others, so they could've broken the cycle of trauma/abuse by choosing not to inflict their own trauma on others like Joey did; Norman was a habitual eavesdropper/etc., so he could've broken that cycle by hearing/seeing things he wasn't supposed to and using that knowledge to get the truth out and find Joey help, much like Wilson did in his youth; and Henry was Joey's dearest, truest friend, his Shoulder Angel, who he reached out to for help in the guilt-stricken latter years of his life, so he could've helped Joey to break the cycle himself if he hadn't been fricking murdered as punishment for trying…

…Did anyone notice that, right after telling her all about how they serve and were created by Wilson, the Keepers suddenly decided that Audrey was too dangerous and they needed to just gas her then and there when she asked them to take her to Wilson because he wanted her to find him…?? And how, when she escaped the gas chamber, they specifically sounded an alarm for access to the Cyclebreakers to be cut off…???

Something tells me that:

There's a reason that not only are these creatures referred to as “Wilson's Keepers,” but it's also only safe to be around them when Wilson is: the son may have created them, but the father Arch gave them orders to ensure that the son continues obeying and remove anyone who might genuinely help him recover from what he did to him from the picture, one way or another…

There's a reason that everyone thinks “Cyclebreaker” means what they think it means: to throw everyone off the scent of its true meaning.

The fact that the Memory of Joey wants the cycle to keep restarting and the potential Cyclebreakers think that the resets are a good thing is both A: symbolic of the fact that Nathan Sr. loves perpetuating the cycle of trauma/abuse by orchestrating situations where he can cause his old Murder Puppets to create new ones who are just as or more brutal while still thinking they're in the right, and B: another hint towards the End Reel having been created by Nathan Sr. in his twisting of the Ink Dimension from the heavenly paradise that Joey dreamed of into the hellish prison that he, himself, now relishes; mayhaps the secret Grayscale Ending, if it exists, will also involve destroying the blasted thing?

Frick. You. Nathan Sr. I. Hate. You. So. Much.

Wanna read about some more highly suspicious songs I found and my concluding thoughts on BATDR's default ending? Those are in Part Four!

To Read the Original Analysis/Theory: Part One • Part Two • Part Three • Unexpected Part Four

#bendy and the dark revival #batdr #batdr theory #batdr spoilers #bendy: the lost ones #bendy: tlo #dreams come to life #dctl #the illusion of living #tiol #bendy spoilers #tw: abuse #themeatly #adrienne kress #allison pendle #allison angel #thomas connor #henry stein #joey drew #audrey drew #buddy lewek #susie campbell #twisted alice #wally franks #bill chambers #brant morris #batdr porter #batdr steve #batdr heidi #batdr keeper

[ikemenomegas]

Omega!Gojo Satoru x Alpha!Reader

I believe we are fated to do the things we choose anyway*

gege akutami is the kind of mangaka who makes fun of almost all their characters. with utmost affection, gojo deserves to be bullied a bit. we love that he's a little heartless, a little frivolous, that he's powerful as a fact, that he cares a little bit strangely, so doing him a bit of justice, here's the mirror to Getou's youth story

tw: canon character death, spoilers for the manga, gojo's emotional constipation and egotism

Toji Zenin cut so many threads the day he arrived on the Tokyo school grounds, but the one between you and Satoru survived. It's already a miracle that Riko was the only one who died that day. The miracle of surviving should have been enough, but now you've lived long enough to find out how much you could love someone too. You get to see how afraid someone is of loving you. Gojo Satoru had one friend. Gojo Satoru had one mate. That was it, that was all he could let himself have.

Springtime Tokyo is still cold. Not as cold as up north in the mountains, but the winter uniforms are blessedly warm. An assistant manager drops you off at Tokyo Jujutsu Technical School on a milky March morning where you are met by Yaga-sensei, the first year teacher.

This teacher has some kind of idea about building community, which is why he's clustered the four of you first-years in the same building, around a loud blue-eyed boy who barely takes one look at you, squinting around a pair of blackout sunglasses, at your purposeful non-expression, before he is grinning, far too wide and it feels like he gets even louder, movements expansive to pull you into the range of an argument he's having with a tall slim boy with long hair tied at the back of his head.

Yaga-sensei just shakes his head and introduces you to Ieri Shoko, who is physically leaning away from the noise as if to escape some blast radius and has the most distant smile you've ever seen in your life on her face.

It's unsettling is what it is. The dark haired boy is just rolling his eyes at the one who had somehow both dismissed you and pulled you into his orbit. The automatic response is to try and get that attention back, but you have at least a little more self respect than that. You climb the stairs to take a room on the same floor to Shoko-san's and leave them to their snipping. You don't see Gojo fall silent for half a second before carrying on bickering, Yaga now stepping in to separate them.

School hasn't quite started yet. It's a boarding school so everyone is just around, getting the lay of the school, setting up their rooms, exploring Tokyo, running into one another and trying to figure out how their pieces fit together.

Satoru has already sorted you all into neat little piles of adjectives

Polite: the boy with the long dark hair, Getou Suguru, although this doesn't necessarily mean nice he notes gleefully. Self righteous and reactive, as in he can be baited into a no holds barred fight, which is new for him. He hasn't been able to fight someone who could hold their ground for more than a minute since he was thirteen. Subversively irreverent.

Morbid: the shortie with the short hair, Shoko Ieri. She discovered her abilities somewhere and even Satoru has to admit some of the diagrams she pulls up are admirably disgusting. Neutral. Satoru has never met someone else who sticks so close to their own whims before but she isn't like anything he expected, dismissive, meandering, goading. And she can't explain how she does what she does, which is aggravating because he can't do it.

And you, the new one. The last to arrive. Fresh meat. Quiet, wary.

You catch him not following you, but showing up near where you are a little too frequently to feel coincidental while you're making a point to meet the upperclassmen. He adds opportunistic and watchful to the list when he notices you do this, but some of the older students seem to find it vaguely endearing - the clan ones like a small animal they can toss treats, the recruited students who aren't trying to suck up to the clan kids with the cautious familiarity of greeting another outsider.

He tries tossing you a treat, granting you some offhanded attention in the common space of what is now the first years' block. Suguru laughs at him when you mostly look confused and apologetically tell him you've never seen either of the movies he wants to debate before refilling your water bottle and wandering back out onto the school grounds with your umbrella.

School starts regardless with some tentative unspoken agreement between the four of you to try and be friends, or at least classmates. There is after all, no one else to be friends with.

Class is boring, so Satoru watches his classmates. Where Shoko is passive and watchful and Satoru is staring into the air, you're openly attentive and Suguru more casually mirrors your attention. Which makes him want to call you another boring small-town bumpkin

Except you are in the same the advanced mechanics elective he is, and you and Shoko become animated discussing the curse anatomy lectures. Yaga takes you away to practice hand-to-hand with his dolls while he lets Satoru and Suguru pummel each other, which makes him think you must be too fragile to handle the two of them. Most people are, so he doesn't think much on it.

Satoru sometimes goes out alone to train when he can't sleep. He lashes out at the wooden dummies on the practice field, ducking under wooden arms and lashing out to see sections of it spin faster. On one of these nights, a week or two into the first year, he sees you standing outside the track, leaning on a railing, face buried in a thick scarf. He's aware of your vague attention, watching him without any particular interest, like how one might watch water sliding under a bridge, but when he sneaks a glance around the practice dummy, you're just as often more fixated on the sky. The moon is full and you're watching the clouds chase across the deep blue expanse, listening to Gojo Satoru's knuckles impacting on wood. And then at some point, he looks over and you're gone, your weird cursed energy signature fading in the dark.

Satoru only sees your technique the first time a substitute makes you spar with everyone else during training while Yaga is away. Apparently the teacher is someone you know because you get into the first argument he's ever seen before you send a spear flying so fast it hits the center of a target and topples it over.

The same teacher makes you fight Satoru, to already defeated attempts at appalled refusal. He'd usually help you push back just on principle, but he hasn't gotten to go on a mission with you yet and his sometimes oppressive curiosity has settled on whether you actually can keep up with him after all.

You can't, but this is Gojo Satoru at fifteen, not fully realized, and the first time he fights you he amends how he feels about "opportunistic". He flies right at your face and swears he makes contact, but you step back at the last minute and he feels an impending impact from his left that is almost the same strength as his own attack. He tries again and you twist out of the way much faster than he had expected. He tries to throw you and you end up descending slowly to the ground, trying to get the teacher to end the bout. Eventually Satoru overwhelms you and breaks your arm when you try to block too many hits in rapid succession. Shoko fixes it, and you wince with gritted teeth and tears in your eyes but don't cry or sob or glare at him with the kind of face that is calling him names you can't say out loud. The demonstration has him, fortunately or unfortunately, folding you into the energy of your little first year group like you'd been there all along.

He's a shaman clan kid, so it's interesting to see you now as not necessarily opportunistic but curious about the other sorcerers, about other people. What a novelty, to be inconsequentially curious. If he'd been too curious as a child he would be either lectured on responsibility or nearly drowned in related gifts meant to appease his moods

You don't appease his moods and the attention of him, one of the strongest sorcerer of the generation, doesn't appease you.

Satoru tries to bait you and things go right over your head. He tries to disrupt your silent, invisible schedule and you let him drag you away with minimal fussing, especially when Shoko or Suguru is involved, but will wander to the side on outings and either find some accidental trouble or something that makes him a little surprised at the intensity of your focus.

He forces you into a combat-determined wager that demands you stop using honorifics with his name and Suguru's name and Shoko's name (without asking the other two) and there's no way for you to get out of it or win so that forces some artificial closeness that becomes real. Language is very important for creating distance, for creating hierarchy and Satoru somehow isn't interested in a hierarchy between you.

He is however far more self conscious of his omega status than Suguru is. He won't say it, but it's a relief when none of you make a big deal out of it when you find out and also a surprising comfort when you and Shoko who don't have to suffer through the literal additional headache of heats try and make them comfortable

For Satoru this involves distracting him by playing video games with him, watching movies, or tossing balls of paper at him while he tries to stop it with his technique. Mostly he's with Suguru, especially if they sync up, but Satoru doesn't have the same heat symptoms as him. During first year even though he sleeps more than he does as an adult, it's typically less than the rest of you might want. Where Suguru gets tired, Satoru will get cranky and mean because he's bored and feverish and Suguru is too tired to entertain him. His family also was never very comforting during his heats so he knows what to do as far as nesting, but having people around is new for him.

He likes to call and text you if you're on missions during these times, which is typical given his clan's sensitivity to him being around alphas at these times.

So even when you're on campus, you and Shoko only spend a few hours with him at a time. Sometimes you play games and the heat makes him almost slow enough to beat on a DS link game. Sometimes he makes you do his homework. Sometimes he likes to throw throwing things at you to see how you use your technique to deal with it.

He adds "sentimental" to the list of adjectives when he realizes he can so easily pressure you in these times into revealing more of yourself to him than you usually do. He's bored and there's only so many things to talk about before you start telling him about an encounter with one of the rare cats that will tolerate living around the cursed energy of the campus, when you grimace and tell him about a terrible noodle stand in Yamanashi province that you still crave somehow, when you tell him about saving fallen leaves in a heavy dictionary you use for that purpose, or the one time you reveal that you've kept every pair of shoes your parents bought you to wear on the first day of school. You tell him these things and it makes him feel like maybe, someday, he might want to tell you things too.

It's not soft but there's a softness to it. A genuineness in the four of you together, in Satoru's and Suguru's growing strength and self surety. Satoru tries to make himself the center of the world, because it's fact that is where he has been all along. But he's not so easily the center of your world. You didn't come from his world.

Satoru doesn't fall. He doesn't think hard about why it becomes so. He barely thinks about it all. He just knows at some point that you're one of his. You're one of his and he wants you to pay him the attention he' accustomed to as center of the world (except he doesn't maybe. He'll be able to say it one day that what he loved was you treating him like he was as human as he could be)

He's terrible at acknowledging whether this possessiveness is anything in particular. After a sparring session, you watch Shoko patch a cut on Suguru's arm with so much longing and a pang of something worms its way in Satoru's chest. He crowds in next to Suguru before Shoko's done, draping over Suguru's shoulders. You don't see the way Satoru's eyes flicker from Shoko's steady hands to your wide-eyed gaze.

He's jealous the way a child is jealous of a favorite toy, hooking his arm around your neck if any omegas outside of school talk to you in the street. If you brush him off when he's trying to use you as a tool for self-affirmation, he sulks around until you acknowledge him in some other way and he will not admit to a single soul why it matters. When he's forced to go home for holidays like oban and returns in a terrible pique, you may fight with him if he lashes out in the worst, most personal ways. You push back and talk to instead of around him or through him and you also don't realize that is why he backs off.

He realizes slowly that he has to be careful with you. He forgets sometimes that you're more fragile that Suguru, that you need help Shoko doesn't need. On what you call the "worst school trip in existence" and Shoko calls "lucky we didn't all die" and Suguru smiles and calls "well we all made it out in the end", even Satoru got injured, yet he feels invincible, like he caught a bullet and threw it back.

When Toji nearly kills him and everyone he ever cared about, he awakens with the power to keep it from happening ever again. He thinks he can carry the world for all of you, for everyone, reveling in his power. He doesn't realize that his presence, the gravity well he made in the monster class's lives, doesn't exist the same way while he's not there because he has a tendency to think everything will be easy for him to fit back into when he returns, or not to think on the fact things could change at all.

Then Suguru leaves and the center of Satoru's world, his reference point, collapses

You're there in Shinjuku the day it happens. It's getting cold again. You're there to meet Shoko. Suguru has gone missing, Satoru is... away. Again. Still. He's been absent whenever he is around anyway. The jujutsu world doesn't have the resources to devote to hunting curse users in particular so the effort to find Suguru has been halfhearted at best and even if he's on your minds, you have jobs to do still.

You're there in Shinjuku and when you don't find the person you're looking for, you find someone else, It shouldn't happen, but it does. You run into Satoru, mind reeling at Suguru's betrayal. You nearly don't see him and he nearly doesn't see you except he sees everything and he's been walking around the district like a ghost.

He appears like a ghost too, tall and pale and ridiculous eyes. You'd tried to see if the world reflected in them once, but now it's more obvious to you than ever that it's just him, nothing more and nothing less.

"Let's go back," he says, and for the first time in months, you return to the college, side by side on the train, feeling like there should be more people in the near-empty car. You get as far as you can before you get to a station that's closed where you can no longer transfer and then you get out and walk in silence.

You walk like there's another person jostling for space between you. When you get to the school, Shoko meets you at the red tori gates. When you get to the mostly empty dormitory building, now a little emptier, Satoru looks at you. And looks and looks and looks. This time, he feels like you might disappear in the pre-dawn light casting your faces in blue.

Maybe it's because he's already lost one precious thing long before he noticed it was gone that he grips your shoulders tight, so tight you almost wince, but turn into it instead, tilting your head as though, were you less careful people, you might brush your cheek against his hand. Just for a little bit of comfort, for a little familiarity.

Then Shoko makes a noise at the top of the stairs, the scuff of her foot, the tap of her palm on the banister. What a terrible day it must be if Shoko is interfering. And you step away.

Satoru doesn't go to bed. For the first time in his life he feels like he doesn't know who he is. He watches your light come on and then go off. He doesn't see you stand at the mouth of the hall leading to Suguru's room with a blanket around your shoulders until eventually you turn away and fall asleep on one of the common room couches, near to where a year of his body in the same spot had left an indent. He doesn't think about the world where you aren't here, where he never sees you again, because he can't quite fathom it.

Because even when he was gone, he never felt like he had let any of you go

It makes him feel sick to his stomach, the closeness of someone else, but it feels worse to push you away so you sit shoulder to shoulder with him some time in the morning. He pretends not to see the new dark shadows in your eyes. You sit and watch the mist burn off and pretend his warmth can hide how the world is a little colder.

*I didn't fall in love with you. I walked into love with you, with my eyes wide open, choosing to take every step along the way. I do believe in fate and destiny, but I also believe we are only fated to do the things that we'd choose anyway. And I'd choose you; in a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, in any version of reality, I'd find you and I'd choose you ― Kiersten White, The Chaos of Stars

#gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru #a/b/o #a/b/o dynamics #omegaverse #alpha!reader #omega!gojo #reader insert #gn #i'm sorry this is so much longer than the getou one #I changed styles to write something else and couldn't get back to the broad strokes style of the getou bit #i want to expand on both #this show is really good and the potential here is too much to resist #the quote came to mind because the six eyes user has a specific kind of fate #but the idea of fate has a lot of interesting discussion around it in between religions #jjk plays a lot with buddhist/shinto/christian imagery including the idea of a fate thread tangled between certain power centers #i was raised in a christian centered culture which has certain beliefs about predetermination that can get incredibly depressing. #fate is generally defined as a predetermined and inescapable path of action or consequences #you can't escape it no matter what choices you make #which seems glum #karma on the other hand has something more to do with tendencies - the things you do to yourself/by yourself that lead to consequence #karma is separate from fate. even if you escape the cycle of karma or samsara you cannot escape fate #little interaction with fate are common - seeking explanations of future fortune or charms to pull you in the direction you want to go #ultimately there is a tension between the human ability to act at will (karma/free will) and fate #How do you justify acting if everything is predetermined? one can trap themselves in ontologic questions about purpose and actions #there is an inevitably and circular in accepting that maybe we can't escape fate but that fate also can't escape us #our actions were always going to matter #io.omegas