#this isn't a relatable post at all i know but it deserves an explanation i think

[dippin-dotty]

i promise i'll make benrey more incoherent like in cannon in my au (reasoning is in our system there's two benreys and it's extremely difficult to even try to do anything without them both being like "lol i wouldn't do that" despite them being fannon based so their inputs are actual dogwater to us)

#finley-post #get these fuckers out of headspace /j #this isn't a relatable post at all i know but it deserves an explanation i think #i've been seeing a lot of people talking about how benrey is portrayed and felt the need to put our two cents in #not only do our fictives have a huge impact on how we portray characters but the au version we have is practically an oc at this point #we tend to project a lot onto him #that being said we are going to be changing how he acts by a lot using those posts people made to help us portray dialogue better :] #so yeah dw we are fixing the issue thumbs up #hlvrai #benrey #osdd problems #did problems

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for telling someone they're a horrible person and making them relapse?

trigger warning: self-harm, suicide(?)

so im, like many teenagers online, an avid participant of fandom spaces and my current favorite is genshin impact. if you've ever interacted with the genshin fandom you may guess where this is going but i happened to find myself liking a ship that is the big nono ship in this fandom (aka the incest ship, kaeluc) but since i mostly stick to my space and don't really interact with anyone that doesn't already have content of this ship on their account id never gotten into any hot water over it.. until recently.

this person, ill call them rick, suddenly liked a bunch of my (non-ship related) posts. normal interaction, i didn't think anything of if and moved on. (i didn't even notice at the time, but they unliked all of the posts before what happened next, i assume as they realized i was a proshipper and didn't want to associate with me.) next thing i know, the same user is in my askbox, sending me the most vile, hate filled messages i have ever seen.

ok... no biggie. i delete the asks, block them and move on with my life. but it doesn't stop. i had never in my whole life received hate online, but now for the first time ever, i had a dedicated hater, sending me anonymous asks at all times of the day. death threats, dox threats, telling me to kill myself, calling me a degenerate and all that, all with the same consistent writing style. now, one could say that maybe this wasn't rick, and maybe not even all the same person but i really feel like this is the only reasonable explanation considering i have like 6 followers and my most famous post has 3 notes. i don't think im important enough to have that many haters.

so, i did the only thing i could think to do: turned off anon asks. then the asks started coming from random throwaway accounts. ok...turned off asks. then it was dms. turned those off too. THE FUCKING COMMENT SECTIONS OF MY POSTS.

dedication isn't enough to describe this. at this point it's actually becoming distressing to me and im considering closing my whole account cause i just wanna get away from all this. im 16, i don't have the mental capacity to spend all day policing my social media because someone wants me to die for liking fictional incest.

so i very reluctantly unblock rick and send them a dm. i very gently ask if they are the person who has been sending me asks/dms/etc and if they are, if they could please stop because it's become genuinely distressing to me and i just want to be silly on a website. they block me.

alright, im now out of options. everything on my profile is blocked at this point and i don't even want to post anything else so i just kind of leave the account behind for a while. when i come back, i discover that someone HACKED into the account and defaced the whole thing (changed pfp, deleted posts etc etc) so now im genuinely bummed. i go to rick's profile and guess who has been unblocked? i ask them if they can please answer my question. they don't answer but instead tell me i deserve everything ive gotten and i should choke for all they care.

i tell them they're a terrible person and go absolutely off the rails like the dumb, upset teenager i am. i didn't say anything particularly horrible (mostly i just tell them about how awful they've made me feel over fictional shit that really doesn't matter and how i just wanted peace) but i definetely wouldn't like to receive a message like that. and rick didn't either, because they blocked me.

well, since im sure you're wondering where this comes in, here's where i kind of feel like an asshole:

i continued to stalk rick's account on a different blog (because i was bitter. ok?) and they've been posting about how they relapsed into self harm because of a message they received from a stranger and how they've been crying non-stop and this is the worst relapse they've had in years and etc etc and i just got this pit in my stomach. this person's bio says they're 15! i don't want to ever be the reason a fifteen year old is hurting themselves! i've been feeling like a piece of shit ever since (esp since i also deal with sh) and i just feel like the worse person ever. i honestly don't know if i was just acting like anyone else and this was an unfortunate consequence or if i need to go pray for god to forgive my sins or something.

aita?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #suicide cw #self harm cw #ship discourse

[murdockmeta]

hi, im new here (not to dd just to the tumblr sphere— why does everyone seem to hate zdarsky/checchetto? i really enjoyed the first part of zdarkys run and i adore checchetto’s art + design, so idk what i missed that makes everyone who comicsposts dislike it so much??

hm. this isn't the easiest question to answer. there's a LOT of different reasons as to why people disliked that run.

tbh I'll admit the first 20 or so issues of v6 are kind of okay. not impossible to read. it goes downhill fast after that, tho. very very downhill.

here's this post by @/xycuro-illuminati that does a good job of explaining why so many people disliked the run. here's my post on the ableism in zdarsky's writing. trust me you aren't the first person who's asked this question before

i'll give you a more general answer of my own opinion, tho

zdarsky's writing misses what most consider to be crucial points of Matt and Elektra's characters. with this, he entirely obliterates their characterization and that really pissed a lot of comics fans off.

i would consider volume 6 to be the beginning of the MCU-ification of dd. it is clear that at that point, some higher-ups were pushing for daredevil comics to become more like the show. the show was a MASSIVE hit and they wanted to cash in on that. so, they had the writers start shifting the comics and the characterization around to fit the show better.

this is where the problem lies. it is insulting, honestly, to ignore the past 50 plus years of writing for matt's character to shift it into something that will be more palatable to live actions fans just so marvel can get a good payday.

the most glaringly noticeable part of this is - the catholicism. the live action show makes a big deal out of matt being catholic when this was never really the case in the comics. while matt being religious and catholic are present in matt's background in the comics, it's not even close to being a big part of the character.

one of the main things that makes matt so compelling as a character is his morality, his integrity. he upholds his moral code relentlessly because he believes it is the right thing to do. he believes everyone deserves a second chance no matter what. in zdarsky's run and in the show, matt's reason for upholding his moral code is tied to his religious beliefs.

here's a good post on the origins of catholicism being related to matt's character and how it differs from the show and why it is such an injustice to tie matt's morality to his religion.

it's really really hard to articulate every single thing that's wrong with zdarsky's run while also giving you a thorough explanation.

i could tell you about how zdarsky's original plot was focused around matt's guilt when he accidentally kills someone but... matt's killed people before. he killed someone in his very first issue. ever. he was chasing after the man who was responsible for his father's murder and scared him so badly the man had a heart attack and died.

all of zdarsky's plots and subplots are all things that have been done over and over, he just writes it worse.

i could tell you about how shitty checchetto's art is. he can't draw women. or fat people (foggy fans deserve reparations). toward the end of the run he gets ESPECIALLY sloppy. he whitewashed kirsten and sam.

i could tell you about how zdarsky wrecked elektra's character. he completely ignored her origins and the character development she's had over the course of decades of writing just to slap some random retconned backstory onto her.

theres so. many. things.

i got into the comics through the show. when I started reading the comics I honestly perceived comics matt and show matt as two entirely different characters because they just felt so incredibly separate from one another. it is not that there are zero similarities, but their reasons for WHY they are the way that they are diverge wildly from each other

i dont know how else to put it except to say this. when I read zdarsky's run, I do not feel like I'm reading about Matt Murdock. it doesn't feel like matt, it doesn't feel like daredevil. it feels like an entirely new character that I do not know.

to fully explain to you why i feel that way would take a damn book. i realize that my answer isn't at all comprehensive and some parts are probably confusing but it is impossible to pick a start and end point. that's just not matt. that's it.

#dd #dd comics #daredevil comics #anti chip zdarsky #asks #ren replies #ren rambles #anon asks #nonny asks

[girlcalledwhatsername]

One of those "is it worth it" debates i find myself having with myself is about mental health related posts that may make good points otherwise but subscribe heavily to and reference and frame mental illness through the biomedical model and the widespread (but false) idea that a chemical imbalance causes these issues. Comprehensive explanation for this + resources here. (Also worth looking into this activist's work where she describes what paychiatric gaslighting looks like)

The thing is I do not want to spread that misinformation anymore. It was presented to me as fact despite there being little proof of it, for a long time in my life from psychology teachers to therapists to psychiatrists of course. Just treated as a natural fact when it was literally pseudoscience on the same level as most rudimentary psychoanalysis.

So I have to make the decision to either simply not reblog it and therefore not engage with the wider mental health discourse and let people be mistaken from what is possibly just an honest mistake as something that has been taught to us all so so largely, they very well might just honestly not know it not be true, and then by leaving it alone I am letting that myth perpetuate from well-meaning people...

Or...

I actually correct the person, get a bunch of people who find their worldview so suddenly challenged being angry about it and calling me anti science as often happens and get retraumatised over my experiences with Psychiatric abuse at large.

And although I mostly choose the former and simply don't engage it leaves me feeling uneasy because I know I was that person once who didn't think to question the validity of chemical imbalance theories and if someone had told me about it honestly it would have saved me a world of pain. But too many people are progressive only on the surface and hate to have to consider abolitionist approaches to oppressive systems, too many people genuinely believe a host of more stigmatised symptoms and disorders to be deserving of incarceration or erasure, and i have no way of knowing who these people would be. And this is why pop psychology and liberal mental health advocates have run the anti-psych movement into the shadows - a movement to which we owe every step of our liberation as mentally ill people.

So how do you make this a bigger conversation again?

Like. Tell me this isn't blatantly a mass misinformation campaign at this point

[linked here]

#mental health stuff #anti psych #anti psychiatry #mental health advocacy #neurodivergent #actually autistic #psychotic #psychosis #bipolar #depression #mad liberation #bpd #npd #adhd #adhd tag #funny thing is i think talking about shit in terms of 'ooh neurotransmitters' and 'brain chemistry' makes it sound believable and sciency #because that was Psychiatry's attempt to align itself with the natural sciences #and we all fall for it! #oh they're talking about chemicals they must be right they must know what they're talking about #I'm sorry but serotonin imbalance doesn't cause depression #what it does do is give you that headache you get when you oversleep trivia of the day

[lord-squiggletits]

Okay another instance of "fuck canon" that's not just Pharma-related, but Ambulon related. I keep thinking of Luna-1 where Ambulon called Pharma "Doctor DJD" and I feel like that's such a total "he would not fucking say that" moment. Obv JRO controls the characterization so what's in the comics is canon/right, I just think that it doesn't make sense for someone in Ambulon's position with his backstory to be that petty towards Pharma?

Ambulon's a Decepticon traitor, he's on the DJD's List. Moreover, he's stationed on Messatine which is the DJD's home planet and is (was?) still an active battle front until very recently.

Proof that Messatine being the DJD's territory is common knowledge: not only First Aid, who's stationed at Delphi, but also at least three Autobots on the Lost Light, know that the DJD make Messatine their home. And this is long before Pharma does his monologue to Ratchet about his t-cog blackmail with Tarn.

Proof that Delphi/the nucleon mines were in an active warzone at least until Pharma started his plague: Pharma wouldn't have had any t-cogs to harvest if there wasn't a continuous stream of soldiers/war-dead coming in to use as his supply.

So then, Ambulon knew fully well that he and all of the rest of them were right next to the DJD's home base, and as an ex-Decepticon he knows he would be on the list. Probably not very high on the list, since Ambulon was a mere MTO who got turned into a failed combiner experiment, but he IS on the list; just because the DJD only proceed through the list in order of importance, doesn't mean that Ambulon wouldn't know that they'd come for him eventually.

And this is a really fucking neat idea to play around with! We don't ever get a canon/explicit explanation for why Prowl decided to station those three medics on Delphi, especially one who's an ex-Con on an execution list. Did Ambulon have a choice? Or was he told to go there with no argument? Either way, I think Ambulon deserves some major kudos, because he must have ball (bearings) of steel to be an ex-Con in DJD territory without constantly being on the verge of a mental breakdown or panic attack. I could honestly write a whole post on the question of "why were these three stationed on Messatine" in itself, but that's for another time.

The point I'm trying to make here is basically that Ambulon of all people should've been sympathetic to the circumstances that drove Pharma to do what he did: they were ALL stationed in the DJD's territory and they knew it, they ALL knew that the DJD's playbook is horrific torturous murder, they ALL knew that Ambulon was a former Decepticon. It wouldn't take a genius for everyone at Delphi to piece together the fact that the DJD would come for Ambulon eventually if either he wasn't evacuated or Delphi as a whole wasn't evacuated. But I mean, this is wartime, right? Every soldier is risking their life, everyone could die at any moment. They can't close down Delphi or evacuate all of the personnel in an active war front battling over a mine just because a medic or three might feel unsafe. Nowhere in war is safe. If High Command let everyone abandon their posts who was afraid of being killed, nothing would ever get done because war comes with inherent risk of death that all soldiers accept by participating, as well as accepting the obligation to follow orders on threat of punishment. (Almost as if Pharma couldn't have just evacuated or run away like Ratchet suggested, but JRO clearly isn't a military expert so I'll digress/chalk it up to "wasn't plot relevant to bring up".)

We got all of like, two pages that showed Pharma and Ambulon's working relationship, and the best we have besides that is JRO's word of god that Pharma and Ambulon had 'mutual reluctant respect' for each other. It's highly unlikely that the two were best buddies regardless, but I don't think you need to be friends with someone like Pharma, while sharing the same situation as him, to be a little more sympathetic to him? Like I get that Ambulon would be offended by the idea of his boss trying to frame him for murder to cover up his own murders, but the "Doctor DJD" line always seemed weirdly callous and petty to me. "Doctor DJD" implies that Pharma was some sort of willing collaborator or servant to the DJD which clearly wasn't the case. And I find it hard to believe that Ambulon, who knows exactly what kind of people the DJD are, would have an opinion of Pharma that was just "oh he should've tried harder/been less of a coward and resisted." Hell, Ambulon's reaction to Sonic and Boom showing up at Delphi asking for refuge was to instantly take pity on them and offer them shelter immediately; if he feels protective/sympathetic towards literal random nobody Decepticon soldiers, shouldn't he have at least as much feeling (if not more) for another Autobot who he worked with and supposedly had respect for?

Assuming that Ambulon got the full details of Pharma's blackmail deal. I mean, there's no reason to assume that Ratchet would've lied to First Aid and Ambulon about what Pharma told him (unless??? conspiracy theory!!!!) , so Ambulon should've heard about the t-cog deal and how it was the only reason the DJD didn't raze Delphi to the ground so long ago. Then again, maybe Pharma's story got explained to him and First Aid via Ratchet's extremely judgemental take on events, so who knows how much of Pharma's side of the story Ambulon would've actually known.

But wouldn't it be so much more interesting if, instead of sneering at Pharma as "Doctor DJD", Ambulon had a more conflicted perspective of Pharma's face-heel turn? Would he wonder how it is that someone who he had such respect for could've been so despicable? Or, more sympathetically, would Ambulon ever wonder if Tarn threatening Delphi was his fault for being there? Would Ambulon wonder what he would've done in Pharma's position, being forced to bargain to postpone his own horrific execution? Would he be angry at Prowl or the higher-ups for stationing them all in such a dangerous post to begin with?

I mean, the answer is that Ambulon was a tertiary cast member at best, to the point that half of his appearances on the Lost Light literally are shown in retrospect after he died, so there would've been no room to explore this in the plot, and Ambulon and Pharma were way lower priority compared to other, more important protagonists. I just think it would be interesting to explore these questions in other metas and fan works.

And yes, I do think Ambulon would not fucking say that ("Doctor DJD") regardless of what canon actually says lmao.

#squiggposting #pharma apologism #i mean it's not really pharma apologism. only a little. but this is mostly about ambulon #g1 idw #meta #long post #come on JRO you can't tell me that pharma and ambulon had mutual respect for each other #and then expect that to mesh with ambulon calling pharma doctor djd so callously later #SURE ambulon could just be that disgusted by pharma's actions but. given the context delphi was in? #it would be weird if ambulon's own fear of the DJD/sympathy for its victims didn't inform his perspective #i just think that like. the watsonian explanation of 'ambulon just hates pharma for what he did' is way less satisfying #than the obvious doylist explanation of 'JRO didn't plan for all of the implications and wasn't gonna flesh out these rando side characters #so in this case i feel like it's better to diverge from canon and explore the implications that it didn't address #than to just accept canon's overly simplified depiction of ambulon just unilaterally hating pharma #however i do think it's IC of first aid to hate pharma and not care about the circumstances. he seems like that kind of hotheaded person

[buttercuparry]

I know sometimes most of us are just playing around in the fandom without any insidious reason. Hell sometimes things are just a vision and we all want those visions to see the light of the day, and there truly isn't anything wrong with that! But if a fan of colour is commenting on your post about something that might be a concern of theirs and you know this concern is related to matter of fandom racism, I don't think they are doing so to personally attack you about something. And if it indeed does feel like a criticism and you know you didn't mean your art/post/whatever else to express any sort of discrimination, I think just talking about it simply can help clear things. You don't even need to go into an explanation. It's really that simple.

I know fandom can get heated and hell despite our best attempts, back and forth tangent of discourse happens. But the way the fandom treats fans of colour not just in the asoiaf side of tumblr but everywhere-it's a bit disheartening. You have people mocking a fan of colour in tags of a post and going "all this discourse for lily white starks". Well you all don't really listen or even acknowledge unless fans of colour are loud, do you? And when they do get loud, you all start having problems.

"Lily white starks" was the point of discourse. That's what many of us who are PoCs in the asoiaf fandom have been saying. They are all the most ashiest whites to have ever whited and race bending is cool as fuck but they aren't 90s animal cartoons where you have two cats having kittens and half of the litter has orange fur while the other half has brown fur. But somehow the character whom fanon deems to be "plain" ( never mind the text says the opposite), whose gender identity gets questioned every now and then ( even though in text they specifically state what they identify as), is drawn racially ambiguous while her siblings look like they don't even have a drop of melanin-you bet fans of colour are going to feel a type of way about this. And till now I haven't seen any major discussion regarding this, not even a peep of acknowledgement that it's a bit weird that the fanon trajectory where people shout "let (redacted) character be ugly" and then this (redacted) character and all who look like her is drawn with brown skin. But wait there's more! The "Helen" of asoiaf universe, even though is said to look like this (redacted) character is often argued to have looked nothing alike at all. So you see how all this shit evolved into the discourse under that art post right? Like it's not like this discontent was bred in a vacuum.

Even now when a new fan comes into asoiaf fandom, after a few months around they know what the dead ladies club is. Because it is that discussed and it should be because Grrm is shit like that. But dead ladies club evolved from being a genuine criticism to a championing a kind of womanhood that posits itself as the best of them all. And this mentality continues to this day and the race bending of certain houses comes from that. You have a fandom that dislikes one of the most important characters so much, that every thing they do is considered a devastation. This dislike is based on the fact that she doesn't really fit in with the kind of womanhood that's considered traditional. It has been literally witnessed how this character has changed the fantasy genre's notion of the "chosen one" but you have dudebros crying foul. And thus anything related to her is bashed more than it deserves to be and you have one of her deceased family members being presented as the devil incarnate. The woman this dead man has supposedly wronged is suddenly a woc, and the whole of the kingdom she belonged to is also a representation of poc culture in fanon?? Like do you see how exploitative this is? And then to further drive in the notion of evil, there came the dominant headcanon where one of the most priviledged and bloody houses in the fictional asoiaf universe is made analogous to real world indigenous pocs who are still fighting for their rights in their own country. It cannot get more batshit insane than that.

I genuinely believe that certain characters were initially drawn in darker shades out of a personal artistic vision. But then this got twisted by the fandom at large to suit their supposed intellectual narrative and bnf artists just simply followed the trend never questioning anything and years and years of this practice got cemented as natural and canon. Never was it questioned why a character ( and all who look like her) who is falsely fanonized as violent and ugly is drawn shades darker and why another character of whom we know nothing of but how violently she met her end is also a woc.

The most recent discourse that happened under the post carries a weight of this particular fandom history. I know there's artistic vision to consider which is why I personally try not to criticize an artist on their own post. This is also a fanart, something given to the fandom freely and I am of the opinion that if it cannot be celebrated then it should just be left alone. But what got to me was that how it felt like through the response there was this tone of trying to turn the tables on the fan of colour who commented. Like the sarcastic commentary on how there is an insistence on Valyrians being whitest white...like dude...hello?? Pretty sure this is on grrm and do you really think this person who is actively frustrated at the racist caricature would mind genuine attempt at being inclusive?! Like I have seen you around, I have enjoyed your posts, I think I even saw you under posts which criticized these particular trends while drawing certain Stark siblings, are you really going to pretend you don't know where the comments came from???

There is also the pointing towards how fandom casts all of dorne as poc and I think we have already established that this fandom is shit. Like I won't lie I enjoy my guilty pleasure of looking at Bollywood gifs representing Dorne, and I think there is this headcanony idea that Dorne is based on North Indian hindu hindi speaking culture. But in same post representing a particular house through this Hindu Hindi speaking culture you have the gifmaker using gifs of the Islamic hajj!!! Like ajaldleryjdlsldldlfg the headcanon then is the idea of amalgating brown bodies and meshing them in homogeneity because that's what we are all over the world right? 😂😂😂

Like I understand the frustration and you really got nothing to explain but it's trying to turn the tables for me (including calling a poc racist when they themselves were trying to address a racist issue)

EDIT IMPORTANT:

I am making this post non reblogable because the assumption on the basis of which I made this post was wrong. The person I have been referencing is a artist of colour themselves- so the core idea of the post isn't applicable. However I still don't know or can't wrap my head around how someone got dog piled on for a comment, and got called a racist ( a poc themself), when they have been one of the primary voices who pointed out many of the racist issues in the fandom.

[rainstormcolors]

First of all I’d like to say that I absolutely love your analysis posts, even when your perspective differs from mine, and your art, as someone relatively new to the fandom I check your blog anytime I can

For the character ask thing, 8, 17, 37, 48 for Seto if you don’t mind <3

This was sweet to read. I feel examining media is a bit like examining a cut diamond, where our own unique point of view will alight different facets of that gem and it’s bright and special for each of us. And seeing others discuss their feelings in good faith has been good for me for sure.

Thank you for the ask! I hope you have a kind day today.

8. Unpopular opinion about them

I feel like fandom opinions and readings of canon are more in the category of polarizing or not-polarizing a lot of the time. I do think other views are fair.

I think it’s on the relatively unpopular side among Kaiba fans that I feel Seto never trusted Pegasus. I don’t even mean from the point of watching Pegasus making a show of humiliating Keith – I think from the time when Seto first Pegasus, Seto was already rigidly mistrustful of adults and people and he had his walls up. It was a matter of business from the get-go to me.

This is maybe less unpopular but still debated it seems, but I do not believe Seto ever felt Gozaburo was going to be a loving parent towards him. Seto went into it like it was a kind of business deal and educational mentor/student deal, and even that it was a kind of Faustian deal. In general, I don’t like the idea that Seto was being selflessly perfect and a perfect little victim when he approached Gozaburo. That does not make Gozaburo’s treatment of the two brothers acceptable at all, and it does not make Gozaburo exploiting Seto acceptable at all. Hurt people can make bad choices and that does not make the harm that comes to them any less real or bad.

This last bit is more personal and less related to actual canon but I want to try clearing the air. I do know I need to let my guard down again with people having fair critique of the early manga. I have some ongoing lingering fear over things in the past and fandom shunning of the past. A certain post that had been aimed at me actually outright triggered a flashback for me some time ago, and also realizing I threw important things away without thinking when all of that was happening... I feel weak that it affected me that badly. I know the manga has its issues -- it really does -- and those issues can be discussed. Good faith discussions are valuable. And it’s not black-and-white. A storybeat can have merits and issues at the same time. Messy complicated stories can even reflect messy complicated life, and no one will have opinions that always align because we’re all unique. I just at times fall into remembering those “people who get pretentious about the early manga deserve to get made fun of,” “maybe if i was a 12 year old boy i'd like manga kaiba isn't it funny how he has no redeeming qualities,” “it’s fucked up and disgusting how people excuse the mindcrush coma,” etc comments, people spreading made-up rumors that I used ableist language I never used, etc, and I need to get over it. (I was more vulnerable to this sort of shunning for outside reasons to begin with, and even here it’s not black and white.) But I do feel I should give explanations for my defensiveness, because it’s not fair to people who do want to discuss the story’s flaws in good faith.

In general, I’m including that previous paragraph because unpopular opinions about a piece of media shouldn’t lead to a person being shunned from a fandom space, and I want to invite good faith discussions and make it clear it’s okay to agree to disagree. We have different lives and are different people.

17. Quotes, songs, poems, etc. that I associate with them

The song The Last Day by Moby is a go-to for both Seto Kaiba and Noa Kaiba. The song Dark Star by Moby also feels Seto-ish to me.

For a poem, The Committee Weighs In by Andrea Cohen.

Some quotes:

“Why does tragedy exist? Because you are full of rage. Why are you full of rage? Because you are full of grief.” Euripides, Grief Lessons: Four Plays by Euripides, tr. Anne Carson

“No greater desire exists than a wounded person’s desire for another wound.” Georges Battaille, Ecstasy, from Guilty, tr. Bruce Boone

“I burn, I freeze; I am never warm. I am rigid; I forgot softness because it did not serve me.” Catherynne M Valente, from Deathless

“I wasted so many years being miserable because I assumed that was the only way to be.” Bojack Horseman, from Bojack Horseman

37. What they really think about themselves

Seto’s mind and heart are cloudy and tangled places in canon. I think he wants to see himself as strong and powerful and capable and that he does not feel lonely and that he does not need friends or warmth or love. He’s very defensive to cling to those ideas about himself. He holds himself to a standard he cannot reach. I think he has very complicated feelings about Gozaburo he can’t examine closely – it was easiest to ignore those feelings after Gozaburo’s death at first and then to realize how much he hated Gozaburo and to focus on that. The complications of these feelings leached out regardless. That Seto is lonely and feels his weakness leaches out regardless. If Seto himself answered this question, I think he’d write down lies he tells himself are true. I also think he does know on some level that something is wrong here and that he needs to change. He is trying to save himself but he's very clumsy at it. He does reach out to others at times but he does so in self-sabotaging ways.

48. Scariest moment of their life

I think Seto separates himself from his emotions quite a lot and he has forms of alexithymia. As such, a lot of the times I don’t know that he can properly register that he’s scared. His brain often transforms that emotion into other emotions or denies it and goes blank. Two examples where he wasn’t able to fight back that emotion of fear are at Duelist Kingdom when he realizes he’s going to lose the duel to Atem and that no one will save Mokuba and then in DSoD after Yugi completes the empty husk of the Millennium Puzzle and Atem does not return. His brain can’t fight the emotion of fear in those moments and they shatter his heart and he becomes desperate. Self-loathing and loneliness and love and failure and weakness colliding inside him. Both of those instances are about Seto trying to reach out to someone from a sincere place and perhaps that’s also part of why he couldn’t be anything other than achingly frightened in those moments.

#seto kaiba

[demonsfate]

I think I've mentioned it before but that's just why i couldn't enjoy the story as much as I could've. Just bc every time Jin says something like "do I deserve to live...?" I think, well, did all the people you kill deserve to live? Or when characters like Lars and Alisa being super friendly to Jin even though in TK7, Lars wanted to kill Jin, and Alisa literally cries at remembering what Jin did to her. It just felt super weird. And I did went into TK8 assuming they weren't gonna explain why Jin's suddenly good again and how people just came to become buddies with him. But I was still highly disappointed they didn't give that explanation.

As I've pointed out many times. in TK6, Jin just wasn't forced to do something bad because he had to or else the world would go bye-bye. But he was also just uncharacteristically cruel for no true reason. See this post where I literally show examples of pre-TK6 Jin with TK6 Jin and how they behave totally different. So the fact that Jin went from telling Alisa she's a "worthless piece of junk" and that he's glad she's gone, versus him showing gratitude for her protection is something that's noticeable in the story, and something that you will question. Because everything Jin did in TK8, I just remember TK6. TK6 left that much of a stain on the character.

So if they weren't gonna explain the sudden change in Jin's character, why he's suddenly good, why everyone supports him... they should've just gave it a quick retcon. Like it would've been much easier to quickly say "yeah Jin's body was controlled by Devil or Azazel and he wasn't actually responsible for any of his actions! Because of this, the other characters sympathized with him and now view him as a victim as well!" As I've always said, if they want Jin to still have That Guilt... he can! it can just manifest from his weakness and shame that somebody used his body to harm and kill.

Another problem is all the unanswered or unresolved things. Maybe I'm wrong, but I could've sworn they said they'll explain the source of the Kazama powers... they don't? Like Jun has the power to repel the devil gene and supposedly heal, but that isn't explain how. She gives Jin the power, but it isn't explained why the Kazamas have it - just that they do and it exists to protect the ones they love. Jun was another problem because they built up her hype regarding her return but she was barely in it other than for flashbacks and in Jin's head. it was only until the very end that we found out that she's, seemingly, still alive. The inclusion of Reina means this isn't the end of the Mishima or the devil saga. Many other characters didn't really get their resolve, either. Xiao did upon finally being with Jin. Jin did with learning to love himself and wanting to live. but characters like Marshal, Paul, Bryan, Yoshimitsu, Lili, Asuka, Jack... they're all stuck in the same loop they've been in for over 20 years now. The same ol' story of marshal needs money, Paul's an idiot who never gets to go far in the tournaments, Asuka and Lili still fight each other - we're STILL not told how Asuka is related to Jin, and Asuka STILL doesn't know of her power that was hinted in her noncanon TK5 ending.

Then there were things I was just... confused by. Azucena is a prime example. When I first saw her in the second story trailer, I thought she was gonna be an evil capitalist queen who isn't what she seems - similar to Reina, she seems like a fun girl, but in reality - she's evil, selfish, power hungry and will do anything for her goal, even if it means siding with somebody who's gonna kill millions. I thought this made her more interesting than the first impression that she's just coffee obsessed. But when we actually see her in the story mode??? She... thinks she's on the good side?! Like she starts talking about world peace and how she'll do anything for it, and then starts accusing Leo of being the bad guy??? Wtf??? How on earth could she believe that G-Corp are the good guys when Kazuya is literally threatening to WIPE OUT countries?! And then her and Leo just as a casual banter afterward?? Maybe I just misunderstood something here? I was kinda confused why Nina just... left the story, too lol. Like did Kazuya had her on a timed contract or something? Some fans are even still debating whether certain characters died or not lol.

I had problems with DJ's depiction (even if he's usually very entertaining before the uh... Saving Jin moment). But I already wrote my issues in a separate post and it feels redundant to repeat them here lol and that other post i reblogged already mentioned other issues i had, too lol

And I know that yes, Tek's stories are usually a mess and it's best not to focus too much on a fighting game's story. But like, when you're consuming a story, it's just hard to turn off your brain and ignore the glaring issues. Whilst I still enjoyed it, there were also a lotta things that were weird.

#✏️ - ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴏsᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏsᴛ // (ooc) #t8 spoilers #// i FELT there were more things that irked me too #// but i can't remember them rn...

[bhawk-goose]

I have 13 followers. IDK why 13 people decided they wanted to see whatever random shit I decide to post. Because of this I'd like to inform people about what to expect. I put some stuff on my blog's description thing, but I'll repeat some of it here.

1: I have no consistency. Some days I post at like 2 AM cuz I had sleep deprived thoughts, sometimes(today) I wake up at 2 PM and don't post until like 4 cuz I got new followers. This consistency also extends to topics, sometimes I'm explaining my gender identity, sometimes I'm explaining what I said to nobody around midnight like a month ago, sometimes I'm warning my new followers about what to expect from me.

2: I don't add tags. I simply do not. This is partly because I figure people can guess what the post's about from reading it, and I don't think anyone who doesn't actively choose to see my dumbass blog deserves to see it by looking for stuff from certain tags. I also rarely talk about serious stuff, so trigger warnings are rarely needed. The only time I've posted something that I thought might need a trigger warning I couldn't think of anything to put in the tags other than gross so I just used the post itself.

3: don't ask about my worldbuilding or writing unless I've specifically mentioned it recently. I love worldbuilding, and love sharing it even more, but if I'm asked about it and haven't done worlbuilding recently I feel useless even tho my worldbuilding already isn't helpful.

4: sometimes I relate to shitty experiences with minor versions that I've experienced, and explain this logic. I recently did this with a post about how in my experience people tend to deal with other people's emotions. When I do this I'm not saying my situation is anywhere near as bad as the one I'm relating it to, I'm just explaining that's how I relate to it. It's like how I've scraped my knee and stuff and felt pain, so I know that more serious injuries must suck.

5: I'm agender. I don't use this to mean I don't care about gender, if I did I would use gendervoid. I use agender to mean I have a gender, but it is not on the typical gender spectrum. If you don't like this, fuck off and don't follow. If you're fine with this now, but wouldn't like it if I just said I'm agender and have a gender without explaining what that means, don't nessecarily fuck off, but please try to understand that nobody owes you an explanation, so in the future if someone else has a seemingle conflicting identity try to understand that it may not be conflicting, you just don't have all the details.

[kyr-kun-chan]

8 Shows to Get to Know Me

The rules seem pretty simple, just to list 8 shows to get to know me. Some people have explanations and some don't so we'll see.

Thanks for the tag @bengiyo!

There are many shows I wanted to add on this list because I love them so much but this isn't a list of my favorite shows. This is supposed to tell something about me. So I tried to pick the shows that I relate to, was obsessed with, used to watch as a kid or just for the ✨ vibes ✨

1. Koisenu Futari

This is one show I relate to the most because I'm aroace. Both Sakuko and Takahashi are aroace and want to live together because they feel lonely by themselves. It's a really great show that just has 2 people figure out how to make their own version of a family in a world where everyone expects you to marry and have children. People like us can feel lost as to what the future might look like because there isn't a path we can follow. Nobody tells us what a happy life might look like if you don't have and don't want a partner so Sakuko and Takahashi are new to this form of family they're trying to create. They want to create something that works for them but nobody around the has similar lives so they have to figure it out all on their own.

2. Bad Buddy

I'm not gay or bi or pan, I'm aroace which means that while I love BL, I don't really relate to it so I didn't want to put many on this list. But Bad Buddy was such a great experience that it deserves a place on this list. This show aired episodes weekly and I love love love everything we did during the week we had to wait for a new episode. People were analyzing Everything from the colors to the dialogue to the music. And I read every single post. Every Friday I would mute the Clown Server on Discord until I could watch the episode. I love how we all talked about the new episode for hours. I would come home and watch the episode and we would still be talking about new points even when I went to bed. Even in the morning I would wake up to new messages. It was amazing.

3. Kieta Hatsukoi / My Love Mix-Up!

A BL that is not often on anyone's favorites list but it is on mine. The leads don't kiss but that doesn't really matter to me because it's a really cute show. It's the way Aoki and Hashimoto have the best friendship and support each other even when they thought they liked the same guy. It's how Ida doesn't understand love and is figuring that out very respectfully. He's really giving Aoki a real chance. He's trying to figure out if he likes Aoki without any moment of internalized homophobia. And also he's demiro in my book and I love him for that.

4. Heartstopper

I love love love the Heartstopper comic. I read it and reread it and rereread it even before the show was even announced. The show itself was everything I hoped for and it was amazing and perfect. I love Isaac of course who is our aroace icon. I'm so glad Alice decided to put him in the group since she had to erase Aled (love you). The second season has apparently big aroace plans for him so excited about that! I love the friendship in this show, they're all so sweet and lovely. I love Nick and Charlie who have such a good, healthy relationship. I love Nick's mom and how she supports her son.

5. Yuri On Ice

Yes we were born to make history! Another show I was obsessed with and I loved the experience of watching it just as much as the anime itself. Just like with Bad Buddy I would be on tumblr reading posts about those freaking rings and the kiss and everyone went crazy over all of that and it was amazing. I still remember watching the preview for episode 10 (I think?) and watching Everyone go crazy over the possibility that the something round and gold could be rings. Or! Would it be a gold medal? We didn't know but we sure as hell had a fun time freaking out about the possibilities.

6. Your Name / Kimi no Na Wa

This one has to be on the list even though it's a movie. I've watched this movie so many times, it's basically my personality. The art and animation is gorgeous, like wow it's so pretty and smooth, I love it. The way Taki and Mitsuha never met but they came to care for each other and care for the lives they lived in each other's bodies. Taki loves Mitsuha's family and wants to do everything in his power to save them. Also can I talk about the music? Radwimps is such a great choice for this movie, they make beautiful music for this kind of music.

7. Natsume Yuujinchou / Natsume's Book of Friends

Another anime I really love. This one has 6 seasons and it's still not enough. I love this show for it's slice of life feel with a supernatural twist. It's a very slow show where not much happens on the surface but every episode has a nice story. It's lovely to see that Natsume warms up to his new family. The first time he has a family that really, truly cares about him and doesn't tell him he's crazy. Only a few anime make me want to read the manga and this is one of them.

8. Avatar The Last Airbender

I used to watch this show as a kid with my dad. We both love it, it's a very beautiful show. It has a clear story overall but also great individual episodes. It has funny moments but also serious ones. It's a bunch of teenagers going on an adventure to save the world, what's not to love? And then there is Zuko with uncle Iroh who have the best redemption arc and some of the best lines in the show. Iconic duo. Anyways, when do I get my magic water powers?

Tagging @onstoryladders and @gilly-bean and @inazumaelle if you haven't done it yet. And anyone who wants to!

#damn it was hard to choose #but i think im happy with this list #moonlight chicken and itsay and ipytm and msp and all those amazing shows are all dear to me #but they didnt fit in this list i think #tag game #tagged

[dmclemblems]

Claude calling the people of the Kingdom and Empire monsters and rallying people under the promise of their deaths and only giving half of a shit for his own people, on top of being willing to worsen foreign relations and refuel fighting on the border wrt Sreng for the same reasons. Hm wow that sure sound like someone who sees outsiders as less than human and only as threats to his own people (who are the only ones deserving of peace and safety). You know, that mindset that Claude fundamentally hates and literally came to Fodlan to wipe out so that people can live in harmony with each other?

Fuck this game and the absolutely horrific treatment it gave to Claude's entire character. Literally nothing anyone says can possibly explain why such a core aspect of Claude's character is not just not present, but actively replaced with its perfect opposite - and this game doesn't even bother to give a HALF-HEARTED explanation, he Just Is like this now. This game can actually suck my ass.

I like the game generally speaking (and AG was written really well), but I'm definitely not fond of how Claude was handled.

Like you said, and one of the biggest things that bothers me that I mentioned in another post is how he basically tells people to surrender or die, yet he says he wants to minimize casualties. It doesn't even make sense that he wants that but attacked the Kingdom without so much as a letter being sent to speak to Dimitri personally talk to to him about the Church and whatnot. Plus, if he did, he might have been made aware that all his perceptions of the Church were wrong.

The whole Sreng thing bugs me because they informed Sreng about the war and whatnot so that they'd invade, but later Claude tries to... not get them involved? He used them when it was convenient and then suddenly didn't want to after that.

One of my biggest gripes is that Claude has no consistency. You know how in CF they kept doing this back and forth trying to be like Edelgard is a bad person who started the war, oh wait no she's just a good person with strong views, etc etc? They really did that with Claude here except at least Edelgard was always consistent with her character. Claude's writing here is just like... they're trying to make him the anti-war person he is in Houses but they wrote him to be the exact opposite. When it starts going too far they pull him back again and have him keep iterating this nonsense about not wanting the war to keep going because people are dying.

Also, Nader saying he couldn't wait to rampage in the Kingdom REALLY bothered me (and he says this at camp so it's missable if he wasn't spoken to). After all the shit they said about Almyrans not being barbarians and whatnot, he's planning to go nuts with attacking the Kingdom? All that would do is make the Kingdom more unwilling to make any kind of relationship with Almyra.

There was definitely a lot of "we're doing this for Leicester" and not... any bit of care for any other land. I've been goofing about it a lot and trying to be mellow about it but just in general I find the things Claude does and the things he says to be absolutely abhorrent in this game. The way he manipulates people with the politely worded "surrender or die" is seriously awful and isn't much better than Edelgard's behavior.

I really doubt there would be any true harmony after this war. Even if the Kingdom lost and ceased to exist (and became just Adrestia and Leicester), I can guarantee there would be civil wars and uprisings all over the place. The people in the Kingdom would never, ever settle for that. Honestly, I could see Sylvain rallying troops and launching an attack on Leicester. I feel like even though he acts mostly calm during the story, he still has that in him because of the way Dimitri didn't want his emotions to get the better of him in battle. It's pretty clear to me that Sylvain despises Claude and the Alliance in GW.

Literally the whole thing with the Kingdom just sits so wrong with me. They were just minding their own business and suddenly everyone is trying to invade. In fact, they're trying to do good things within their borders and fix their society, but they can't because everyone around them just wants to go to war. Even the Church kind of forced them to get involved by asking for their aid. I'd put the least blame on them honestly because they really don't do anything bad at all here/in this game, but the war forced Dimitri's hand in so many ways when all he wanted to do was make a better society for the Kingdom.

By the end of the game I'd say Claude is really just... marginally better than Shahid, and that is not a high bar. It just served to keep the theme going that Almyrans just want war and fighting. Claude had other options and he chose invasion and killing. He chose to do what Shahid did to Leicester.

I honestly feel really bad for the Kingdom. Nobody will leave them alone and the worst part is that they're all so loyal to each other and so tight knit that like... once you've fucked with one of them you've fucked with all of them. They're not just gonna let it go and be like oh yeah okay we'll just stop the Kingdom from existing and give up on it. Dimitri also just wants to keep his people safe and Claude abuses that fact to make Dimitri let him get past him to get to Rhea. Basically, Claude is saying either I kill your people or let you me pass by and kill Rhea. Seeing as Rhea has always supported Dimitri and has never tried to obstruct any part of his rule, it's really shitty to be like oh hey you know this person who has done right by you and has been super chill with you? Let us kill her or I'm gonna kill your people and make you feel like shit about it. He uses people's emotions to make them stop fighting, and what he said to Ashe really bugged me.

There's a lot of stuff at the camp in GW that I saw (I'll end up posting some of it later, it's just that my posts are totally out of order for when I actually post them compared to when I'm playing so that I don't end up posting tons of stuff all at once, flood people's dashboards and then just have nothing to post lol) that really highlight how awful all of this is. Several characters are unhappy with all of it, and then you have the dumbass types who don't give a fuck like Raphael and Leonie (which is BEYOND me, especially with Raphael. He's supposed to be the gentle, kindhearted one and he's like 150% okay and happy with invading and fighting people and just knocking them flat. He gets excited for it. Hopes Raphael just ain't the one for me lol), and they only care about a good fight no matter who they have to kill.

Only a few people regularly question the morality of Claude's army, like Yuri, Hapi, Lorenz and Ashe. Most of them just... do not care. They'd kill good people for a good fight or because they just happen to like Claude so they'll ruin other people's lives.

I know it's just a video game, but... I just hate everything about the second half of GW lol. I love the early Almyran lore and it helps a lot for the missing pieces in Houses, but the story is just... disgusting. I've always hated Edelgard's actions in Houses and I'm not gonna justify Claude's behavior and actions in Hopes just because I like him in Houses. Just like her, he's a huge warmonger in this game. I guess it's because I just... don't like war and I have a very strong mindset on people who do things like that, especially when they attack people who are just living their lives and doing their own thing. Even though I've always been a Kingdom girl, I don't think my feelings would change on any of this if I was more bias toward Leicester. I don't think I'd be comfortable seeing the Kingdom being trampled for literally no reason whatsoever. We can't even blame Cornelia or other TWS members in this game for a lot of what happens to them. It's Edelgard and Claude doing a lot of it.

There's just... a lot of really awful things happening in this game and Claude spearheads a whole ass lot of it.

Claude von Deserved A Lot Fucking Better.

#Three Hopes Spoilers #I'm torn for my next Houses run bc I AM technically in the middle of a GW run #but I miss AM. but also I am not ready to have to see Rodrigue and Miklan die again lol #I mean Miklan technically seems to survive in GW and... I guess in SB? I don't remember well on that one but #at least in AG he died having gotten better and being a commander! #but also I just miss the good writing LOL I miss AM and wanna play it but #my data/progression would end up being split off into two playthroughs and that just bugs me #I am sad and miss Dimi's accidental flirting!!! I miss the pure lil cutie who got to be at least #a lil happy at the Academy and WAS ACTUALLY FRIENDS WITH CLAUDE #this game gave me many good things... all of which were isolated to AG lmao #I got a lot of things I rly wanted in this game but LIKE. AT WHAT COST #DCB Reply

[tsukikoayanosuke]

A sudden realization why I don't like canon/oc romance is because it's not my wish-fulfillment fantasy.

This is not a hate on canon/oc stories. I write canon/oc. My friends write canon/oc. Like don't get me wrong, I like romance, but I am very picky. When it comes to canon/oc, I like the cute, slow burn, and others tropes that I can't dissect yet. But even then, I am still selective. I mean, just look at the romance progression in TW:OPT.

But with canon/canon, I can handle mostly any trope and au and Sonic the Hedgehog-speed build up, and I think I finally get it why.

I mean, like many others, I write for wish-fulfillment. But my wish fulfillment is not being crushed on boys from left and right. My wish fulfillment is really just living in a world where people accept me and I can express any of my words freely without burdens. Basically, I want to be isekaid without the harem.

This is on me really. When I read canon/oc, I have to be really hard to separate myself with the oc (actually this happens to any first person pov, whether its oc or canon characters). Because, sometimes, the ocs or mcs (sometimes y/n or 'reader') are the projection of the writer and I'm supposed to relate to them. When canon and oc started developing feelings early on without preamble or just a small mention "Oh the oc is cute", that's somehow become a turn off for me. I have trouble accepting myself and can be pretty apathetic, so even in fiction when canon being a bit to flirty toward the oc/mc, I'll almost be like "Don't you have anyone else you can flirt with?" I'm not playing hard to get, I just... I don't think I deserve adoration.

But then you're probably wondering "isn't that what wish fulfillment is about?" Yeah, for many. But really, my wish fulfillment is being accepted into a world where nobody put an expectation in my and just me doing whatever I want without restraint. My wish fulfillment fantasy is really just being able to cry and be mad without thinking everyone else might think I am a petty child. Or me being able to shower the friends in the world without being afraid of rejection despite not expecting a return.

There is also a fact that I might be aromantic, but I'm still questioning my sexuality really. But really I need to learn how to love and accept myself first.

"But didn't you write romance? OPT has romance right?" Yes. I write romance, even smut. That's part of the wish fulfillment as well. But the thing is I can separate Jonah from me. Jonah Argentum is not me. Yukiko Sekaihashi is. And because Jonah is not me, which means I know I can do whatever I want to him, I can give him a romantic subplot. But, you've seen OPT. None of the pairing is settle. Because that's also my wish fulfillment fantasy: to be able to build a relationship in my own snail pace and not lose anything.

I don't write much about Yukiko, but because she is me, I more often use her as a venting punching back. That's why she's nothing special. She's rude, whiny, pathetic, unlikable, because I am projecting all of my negative energy onto her. That's why she's the only oc I ever created to have a sexuality section.

I've been thinking about this for a long time actually, but only reach the conclusion now. So, this is more of an explanation post? I just need to get this out of my chest. Sorry if this sound whiny.

#the captain's rambling

[gooeyslime]

Idea 5: Vanessa visits the graves of her victims and sees ghosts

An idea that I've seen exceedingly few fics try and cover is Vanessa encountering the ghosts of the people whom she (as Vanny) murdered after the 3-star ending.

I am unsure as to how one would make this situation happen. Maybe it could be a dream.

A scenario that I like most has to do with the idea that Vanessa visits the graves of the children she (no vanny) killed. After she was freed, she reported the location of the bodies so that they could recieve a proper burial. Vanessa knows that it isn't enough, she doesn't think that she will ever be able to do enough to atone for what she did to all of those children (it wasn't you, it was Vanny.) At the very least she tries to go and visit their graves once a week, making sure to bring flowers for them everytime. Vanessa doesn't say anything during the visits, what is there to say? "I'm sorry?" Yeah right, as if SHE is deserving of forgiveness...

I really like it because there are a lot of things you could potentially cover, including:

How would the ghosts react to seeing the freed Vanessa? Would the children be enraged? If so, what would they do?

Or would they be able to see that the person in front of them is not really the same as the one who murdered them, not mentally, at least? Maybe (relating back to idea 2) the children who were taught by her would be able to convince the other children of this.

How about the therapists? They would likely be more willing to listen, being adults trained in understanding psychological conditions.

One could discuss how Vanessa has been dealing with having 2 sets of childhood memories, a fake abusive one (put there by Glitchtrap for reasons of trying to make her more obedient, which ended up failing) and her true, standard, evidently normal one. (in this universe patient 46 and their tapes didn't exist, save for that one line about lying about childhood, just pretend it was in one of Vanessa's tapes)

And, of course, we can't forget Vanessa. What would she do? It is most likely that she would curl up into a ball and await the punishment that she thinks she deserves (she doesn’t). After all, it is HER fault, right? (No, it’s Vanny's.)

If you include Gregory in this encounter, he, being the "no fear" gremlin that he is, would probably try and start to defend his… uh… paternal guardian of unspecified rank in some way, either by trying to explain that Vanny is no more, or try and actually fight the ghosts.

As you can see, there are many ways that I think someone can make a mini story out of this concept.

I agree, as you said you can do a lot with that and we need more stories of Vanessa acknowledging the victims and go in depth about her getting manipulated by Afton and how she truly regrets helping him. Plus we need more stories where we get a more in-depth look at Vanessa and her inner turmoil post 3 star ending.

Also I find the mental image of Gregory being ready to throw hands with ghosts incredibly funny but honestly him being there and being so ready to defend her, especially if she's not defending herself or even agreeing with what they're saying, would probably make the ghosts be willing to listen at the very least.

If I had to write my own story I'd probably have the kids be angry at her, she freaks out knowing that Afton also had to deal with the angry ghosts of his victims which would make her feel like she's basically just like him, she killed them and they refuse to move on because of her so she runs away, upon finding out what happened Gregory insists on going with her the next day where he basically defends her from the ghosts' accusations since Vanessa isn't gonna do it herself. The ghosts would be shocked a kid is willing to defend her, especially as he tells them he almost got killed himself, they would still be wary of Vanessa but now are willing to at least listen to an explanation. It would probably take multiple days and maybe even a few recordings of like Freddy and the other animatronics talking about what really happened to finally convince them, it would also help Vanessa to stop comparing herself to Afton so much since she was basically brainwashed while Afton killed while in full control of his body and mind.

Honestly I might just turn this into an actual fic eventually... While I am working on writing my own AU it's gonna take me forever to finish it just because I am rewriting the entire plot of all the games while this would take way less time and if nobody is gonna make more content about this I might as well do it myself lol

#ask #halogenrobotics #fnaf #fnafsb #vanny fnaf #vanessa fnaf #gregory fnaf

[zeynatura]

While this post was written after watching ep 5 of Extraordinary Attorney Woo is more of a personal vent so feel free to ignore specially if you’re looking for something about the kdrama.

Oh no, this episode made me realize why i am so affected by the recent ‘fight’ i had with my friends.

Autistic people can’t lie, well i sure as hell can’t and my word was questioned by my friends yesterday, it all started with a small argument about the reason why i did something that is too long and too specific to share here, but it is or i thought was harmless.

The event happened months ago and my memory isn’t reliable so i don’t remember most of what happened back then, what i do remember was my logic behind what i did and so i told my friends the whole explanation of what the thoughts running through my mind at the moment where and why i did what i did. And i was expecting my friends to just accept my reason and let it go but no, they were insisting that the reason was a different one.

And at first i was too taken aback because how would they know my reasons of doing things better than me? Seems impossible, right? Unless there were evidence that supported their claim but what i did (and i know this sounds suspicious as heck but believe me if you knew what i’m talking about you’ll think it’s stupid) left no evidence of what happened even less about why it happened.

So i asked them why they didn’t accept my reason and one of them told me that i’ve lied previously about some other topic so it wouldn’t surprise them to think i was lying again and another friend agreed. And that other topic is a technicallity, it’s about a specific term used for a specific action (again with the mystery, i know) my understanding of that term is different than that of my friends, so to me i don’t partake on what the term stands for but my friends think i do, and they know that our understanding of it is different and nobody went to go look up a definition of the term to reach a middle ground or something so everyone was kind of on their own, or more like they were on one side and i was on the other one. 

And it’s something like “skipping” and i think it only counts if i land on one feet while my friends think it counts if i land on both as well. So they think me saying i don’t skip as i land on both feet is lying, because they consider i do skip.

I told them again that our understanding for that one was different and wasn’t related to the discussion we were having at that second, and that same friend said: but it does, because i know you lied before so now i can’t trust anything you say.

And that’s where my heart broke.

Firstly because that was news to me, secondly because nothing i say is gonna “fix” it, i can’t make them trust me with articulated thoughts.

I was and still am confused on why would they doubt me? why would they think i would lie? why would i lie about it? it doesn’t make sense, i wouldn’t lie about something i thought was trivial let alone if it was something serious. To me lying isn't an option, i forget people can and do lie all the time.

I was completely speechless until i decided i had enough, i dont’t deserve to be treated this way and i’m about to cry, so i left, and i haven’t talk to them since.

And for the first time in a long while i felt lost, i didn’t know what to do, who to go to for counsel, because at moments like this i would have gone to my mom but she’s not here anymore, and the second best option would have been the friends i was running away from.

After that i just felt like a burden and didn’t want to bother anyone else so i just cried, and cried, for hours until i fell asleep.

Is not the first time i get into a misunderstanding with my friends but is the first time it has affected me this much, and partially is because i am in such a vulnerable state everything affects me x100, I was already a very sensible person now it’s worse.

I can’t help but wonder if all of this happened because i’m autistic and they’re allistic.

I still don’t know what to do, because i hate confrontations and i’m scared of loosing them, also i don’t think i can talk to them without crying and tomorrow we’ll have our dnd session and i am desperately distracting my mind from the issue by watching this kdrama but it indirectly reminded me of it and now i’m back to 0.

#super personal #tw death of a loved one #vent post #autistic #zeynatura #why would they trust their assumptions more than the word of a friend?

[moultinmush]

Part 1# A Fandom Worse Than It's Content: A Reitanna Seishin Multi-Part Explanation

As of composing this post, it's been almost over 4 years since it began—The hate has long since simmered down from it's previous boil. The informed I do not doubt are lost on why I'm not letting sleeping dogs lie—Why on this God's green earth another person is discussing any matter related to Reitanna yet again.

To start off, this blog isn't a discussion on Reitanna—But one about the unspoken part of her fandom's history that's been left unarchived, and arguably, purposely buried. Threw a series of posts, i'll be going in-depth on where her loyal haters came from in early 2020. I will do my best to be brief, and to the point. This is a emotionally heavy subject for me, so apologies if I stray away from just facts on occasion. (Read Trigger-Warnings & Post Guide Here)

(Art by Reitanna Seishin)

It was 2019, late September. Reitanna finds her channel hacked after clicking on a spam pop-up saying her channel was under threat of being shutdown. Reasonably, she panicked and clicked the link—But because of that, she found herself locked out of her own channel with a stranger posting Donald Trump propaganda videos on her account.

Following the hack, Detective Scary would make a video on the topic—Bellow is a reupload, left unlisted and with it's comments turned off: This is due to this purely being evidence of events.

Another video created was by Here For Nothing, this video was just a general discussion of events and what at the time thoughts were.

We intersect here, and leave Reitanna behind—As during this period, none of the above was known by fans, or a fan creator who at the time went by Kara Mendoza. She would create a short 2-3 minute video announcing the hack, and the creation of a discord server for fans to join and offer support.

Many confused fans would join and try to peace together what had happened—And whether or not they could help. This included myself, who was 15 during that period. The server was a welcoming place, as fans were eager to get to know each other. You could often find discord calls filled with a good 6-7 people in them at a time.

I'd meet almost everyone i'll be talking about there, and despite my at the time anxiety at the circumstances—I was excited at the potential of getting to make new friends. It felt like I was a part of something bigger than myself, something important. I think many of us felt that way.

The server owner would continue with her Reitanna update videos—But Reitanna's channel would end up being a backdrop compared to the situation that would begin to rapidly unfurl.

Most knew about the Kiwi Farms, Reitanna herself did too—No one agreed with it's existence however (no fans, anyways.) But they'd learn to care that it existed at all as the fan server would be raided, and everyone would soon need to server hop.

Detective Scary would be found out to be a Kiwi Farmer (See screenshot above) whether they had a hand in the server raid I do not know. All I can say is to me they seemed impartial and more of a spectator instead of an active instigator. They deleted the video above, and after that I never heard about them again.

Clownfish345 was someone who went by the tag ''Dank Memes'' on Discord. I mention this, as they will be mentioned later. But for now just know them as the one who leaked the servers invite onto the forum at the beginning.

Before we continue, I do not stand deadnaming or misgendering. I do not care how much I or anyone else hate these people, everyone deserves respect. Mandi does not go by Kara anymore (At least that's what I've heard threw the grapevine) So in all the other posts that is how she will be referred to, I only said her deadname at all so people would know who I am talking about.

Along with that, if I am contacted about an event being misrepresented I will do my best to either exclude, or include information as needed.

Next ->

#reitanna seishin #Youtube

[foxxe-love]

Hello

So this blog is pretty much so i don't spam my main [@asher-foxxe] with only fox related things so much {that will still happen cause i'll probably forget i made this}

So this is gonna be like 99% fox related and 1% serious or important stuff, i might even post my own art or stuff idk. Also, please let me know if i do or say anything wrong or hurtful, i don't always know how to word or say things [not an excuse just an sorta "explanation" if that] so if anything i say isn't cool or hurts someone please please let me know so i can learn and be better in the future :)

Also also, i kinda ramble as you can probably tell from this so feel free to ignore most of what i say, half of it is just kinda nonsense or random thoughts i felt the need to share, if you don't like that feel free to block, i don't mind :)

‼️DNI if you are‼️

racist

homophobic

transphobic

aro/acephobic (aro and ace people are lgbtq and all of us deserve love and respect. if you think otherwise get out.)

ableist

misogynist/sexist

a nsfw blog (some nsfw stuff is alright, but like not if that's what the whole blog is pls)

you don't respect other people's religions/beliefs

a trump supporter. (honestly any super political blog.) [like if the whole blog is dedicated to any political party/ideology just leave pls, this is lowkey my happy/safe space]

pro-life

I can't really think of anything else rn, i'll add more if i do but yeah. Also, not really a dni but i am white so if for any reason you don't want to follow/interact or want to block me or anything for that, that's perfectly fine, curate your space however you feel the need to. and stay safe<3