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sobashahzadi · 1 year

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“The misadventures of Peke-j doing jackshit”

a crack fic I’ve been writing in my spare time I might finish it and upload it to ao3 once I get the invite back I dunno

“Hey Chifuyu?” Takemichi lowers his voice

“Yeah?”

“What do you think Peke-j does when your not home”

“Probably nothing much”

Oh how he was wrong, terribly, horribly, wrong

______________________________________________________________

Peke-j purrs sweetly as he appreciates his owners gentle hands against his fur, he stretches and lies himself down on his stomach

“Aw shit, yeah, that hit the spot” he thinks to himself, cats can’t talk, or at least humans don’t understand what their saying, so whilst Chifuyu might think Peke-j is nothing but a cat, living to simply survive, he’s very wrong, as there is much much more to Peke-j’s mind than anyone would have ever anticipated.

Chifuyu’s phone rings and he shifts to go anwser the call, Peke-j flinches at the sudden vibrations from his owners pockets but repositions himself quickly, closing his eyes.

“Really? Now Michi?” Chifuyu groans

“Okay, okay, fine, I’m on my way, I’m driving though!” Chifuyu gets up from his bed and stretches his arms out,

“Hey Peke-j I’m heading out now to help michi with something, I’ll be back in a few, yeah?” He pats his head, not expecting an anwser,

“Leaving me already?” Chifuyu can’t understand him, obviously, yet Peke-j still anwsers, in his own way.

Chifuyu slips on his socks and hurried out the door,

after a while Peke-j hears the click of the main door and slowly gets up. He climbs to the windowsill, still left open by Chifuyu and looks outside,

the sky a brilliant baby blue with fluffy streaks of white, the sun shines down upon the spring blossoms, illuminating their splendour as Peke-j smiles to himself, in his own feline way

“Thought that bitch would never leave, suppose it’s time to go visit my hoes”

Peke-j sighs, well, the closest a cat can do to sigh at least

He carefully hops down windowsill after windowsill, gracefully stepping on his two front and then hind legs onto the hard cement ground right by his owners apartment block.

He struts his way through dark alleyways, confidently hopping over discarded boxes, fences and the sort to reach his destination, which was his usual first stop of the day, his bottom bitch

______________________________________________________________

Sanzu exhales loudly as he explains his story for the third time, each time giving more and more detail to explain his frustration and to be quiet frank it doesn’t seem that Peke-j gives a shit yet he listens anyway,

The thing with Sanzu is that although he’s obnoxious as fuck, Peke-j feels sympathy for the poor soul, bless his heart

Also he gives the meanest head rubs and grooms his fur to perfection at each visit, something Chifuyu doesn’t seem to be bothered to do himself.

Sanzu brushes his hair gently and continues to ramble onwards;

“So then I asked Mikey ‘Why can’t we go see the Barbie movie?’ The trailer itself showed that it’s obviously going to be the greatest coming of age movie this century had ever seen, a cinematic masterpiece even! But, noooo, ‘It’s for girls’ he says, like excuse me? Long hair is feminine too and have you seen his ragged weave of damaged locks? Shitty excuse of hair, if you ask me, even my fucked up barbie dolls have better hair than that!” Sanzu mimics Mikey’s voice in a high pitched manner and then grumbles,

Peke-j wishes his ancestors had evolved to be able to cover their ears,

#A very silly idea I know #but one I had for a while and couldn’t resist #Crackfics have some sorta healing properties istg #Very fun to write #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers chifuyu #Chifuyu matsuno #peke-j #tokyorev #tokyorevenger #Tokyo revengers fanfic

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tsuriaa · 2 years

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# 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐄𝐅𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐅 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐄 ᝰ

[𝗧𝗢𝗞𝗬𝗢 𝗥𝗘𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗚𝗘𝗥𝗦]

[ VARIOUS! TOKYO REVENGERS X 707! READER ]

Summary: A young hacker is assigned to monitor an unknown group chat from the app she created, but where's the fun with just observing?

Story navigation:

꒷⁩ ࣪˖ [𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄]'𝐒 𝐃𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐘 𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌 𝐎𝐍𝐄

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌 𝐓𝐖𝐎

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄

#miria writes #story navigation #the defender of justice #tokyo revengers x reader #707 reader #will post the chapters sooner or later i think #crackfic

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harusaki-hugo · 7 months

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I fight with alien once.

Fandom: Tokyo Revengers+slightly hetalia

Characters: Sano Manjiro , Ryuguji Ken, Sano Shinichiro, Mitsuya Takashi + GN!Reader

Synopsis: Tokrev boys with s/o who keep saying weird thing but this time involving fighting alien. Honestly it's a crackfic.

Your boyfriend know your habit of randomly start telling the story of your life, it's a cute habit honestly and he adore you about this because now he know more about you. But sometimes it's can be confusing when your stories start getting weird and make no sense but he love you too much that he keep listening to your stories, that's it untill one day you suddenly blurted out; "I fight with aliens once."

Sano Manjiro;-

He looks at you with a raised eyebrows, half eating taiyaki between his lips as he turn around to fully look at you.

"Really?"-"Really!! It's a noppera type of aliens."

The type who listens to your story before falling asleep, no matter where you are if you start talking expect him fall asleep halfway through it.

But don't worry he , surprisingly, remember all the story you told him perfectly, no hole in plot at all.

When he in the mode he will ask a detailed question about it.

"So you tell me that you stuck between wall and a hundreds of aliens and the only thing you did are giving them food and entertainment?"-"Yup!"-"Huh, neat."

Actually impressed with the story and wondering when will the aliens attack earth again resulting you smacking him in the head.

Overall; he might be walking red flags but that ain't stopping him being a 10 and great listener to your weird story.

Ken Ryuguji;

Literally sighing heavily and give you the most deadpan expression second to someone you know but still-

"I can accept when you told me about cat talking to you but this too far , honey."-"but drakeeenn!!"-"no, nope , not today."-"I haven't reach the climax where I jump down to the sea."

Okay, he might got interested a bit... scratch that ,man this close pulling his hair on your story.

"I'm sorry, you what?!"-"jumping down from moving space ship and got stranded in deserted island."

Your story keep stressing this man and he don't know what true or fake because you sound so convincing , he started to worry about your childhood.

Start treating you like you have delicate mental health and try helping you get better like man literally show you a good therapist in your area.

Conclusion; Boy is 100/10 but will try to drag you to therapist if you joked about something involving mental health.

Sano shinichiro;

Didn't even bother to look at you as he continue fixing the bike , only humming and nodding at your words.

Man used to weird thing that he immune to your weird story.

"and then, grandpa Rome appears and start singing."-"grandpa Rome sound hot."

He have Mikey as his brother and Izana as adopted brother, he can handle you

-he handle it like a champ-

He didn't even bat an eye when you told him you broke someone nose and that man is the United States of America himself.

-he just thought you punch a foreigner.

Conclusion; I love this man so much that I won't stop crying, please give him the live he deserves.

Mitsuya Takashi;

This man is a saint, like boy have patience over nine thousand I can't-

"wow, that's mean thanks to you we live in peace."-"stop it! you make me blush!"

He know exactly what to say to make you happy.

"then Italy start drawing on their face."-"magnificent, did you help him?"-"heck yeah!!"

this man to precious that I physically crying inside out upside down.

He just to perfect I can't write-

He a great listener and know exactly what to said.

Didn't care how weird your story was, he loves hearing your voice.

Overall;this man is walking green flag but I will slam my feet on the break so I can stop for him.

♾️/10.

I haven't sleep for a day and I'm high on caffeine, please send help.

#tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers #x reader #ken ryuguji #sano manjiro #sano shinichiro #mitsuya takashi #sano manjiro x reader #sano shinichiro x reader #draken #ryuguji ken x reader #mitsuya x reader

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lemondidurmom · 1 year

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Welcome to my page!! I'll write whatever you want as long as it's in my comfort zone. So please feel free to request anything!! I promise I'll get to it eventually!!

DNI list

Racists

Homophobes

Transphobes

Dsmp

Children likers (pedos)

Also if you are She/Her She/They I'm going to have to block you since there isn't many Male writers who write fanfiction. And most she/her aligned like to fetishize male content.

This is what I write for!!

Character x Character

Character x gn!Reader

Character x male!Reader

I also will write

Fluff

Crackfics

Angst

Smut (attempting it)

I won't write

Darkfics

Children x anything really

Fandoms I'll write for

Trigun Stampede

Twisted Wonderland

Code Geass

Demon Slayer

Devilman Crybaby

Buddy Daddies

Genshin Impact

Jujutsu Kaisen

Tokyo Revengers

Chainsaw Man

The Disastrous Life of Saiki K

Hunter x Hunter

Blue Exorcist

Vanitas no carte/The Case Study of Vanitas

Sk8 the Infinity

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hollowfyshunsuikubo · 10 months

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Hello and Welcome!

Hello hello! I'm Vine. It's nice to meet you!

Now, this isn't my first foray into the Tumblr fanfiction scene- I used to have three major blogs back in 2020, but during the pandemic I purged them to focus on life. But now I'm back! This post is the standard information post- what fandoms I write for, what I'll write, what I won't write and my ask process.

Each of these is below the cut!

Fandoms I Write For:

Bleach

Death Note

Attack on Titan

Tokyo Revengers

My Hero Academia (SPARINGLY)

Kuroko's Basketball

Shadow and Bone (books and show!)

Artemis Fowl

Inheritance Cycle

Genshin Impact

Castlevania (TV show + Nocturne)

Blood of Zeus

What I'll Write:

Crackfics

G-Rated

PG-Rated

M-Rated

NSFW

Character X Reader

Character X Reader x Character

Character x OC (paid request only)

What I Won't Write: !TW!

Incest

Minor x minor

Minor x older character

R*pe

GORY/NONCON NSFW

Beastiality (LITERAL animal x human)

Character X Character (in full fics)

Ask Process:

Currently, my asks are open, but it's paid requests only at the moment! As long as you follow the rules, I'll be more than happy to write something for you. Ideally, you would have: the character, the AU (if you want one), the situation, and whether you want fluff/angst/comfort/light smut/death etc etc All comissions currently start at $5 NZD and can be requested through my Ko-Fi!

#anime #X reader #attack on titan #bleach #tokyo revengers #my hero academia #shadow and bone #shingeki no kyojin #six of crows #King of scars #death note #genshin impact #artemis fowl #inheritance cycle #fanfic writing #kurokos basketball #Castlevania #Blood of Zeus

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clovers-garden-co · 2 years

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ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴇɴᴅʏ’ꜱ 💀 ᴡᴇ ʜᴀᴠᴇ:

imagines

drabbles

one-shots (requested only)

——————————

When it comes to requesting oneshots, put it in detail, be… specific.

I will not write for anything predatory, no pee 💀 (tf), no vomit (lord.) , no shit - seriously just have some sense. be mindful of what you request. and no… no incest. besides that, go crazy.

i write for tokyo revengers mainly, i really.. really… really despise kisaki so you’ll rarely see anything for him here. might get back into jjba… and theres a bunch more. if you see random characters lets say the lorax 💀💀💀 dont question it.

i also write crackfics. they keep me from having writers block temporarily so request those too

that’s about it 🙏 see ya

#tokyo rev fluff #anime #imagine #oneshot #fluff scenario #tokrev

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fic-dumpster · 2 years

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Yeah, Sanzu (and Mikey) would definitely do this to doe https://twitter.com/sinseiyoito1006/status/1462790975429177346?t=gfzFZzKLmTgyCjHdr8ar5Q&s=19

Link here!

DIH || A tit job

Bonten x Reader (reader has boobs)

Warnings: food play? Is this qualified to be called that? Smutishhh, nonsense, crackfic, intense making out, boobs, kinda gross if you squint.

Waiting. That's what you were doing in Mikey’s office. He needed to review some stuff Kokonoi left him and reluctantly sat on his desk and flipped through the pages.

You decided to stay and wait for him on a chair near his desk. But boredom was making its way in, leaving you feeling fidgety on your seat. Remembering a little something on your bag, you opted to entertain yourself with it.

“What you got there?” asked Mikey. He couldn’t help but see your cheeks moving as you munched on whatever treat Mochi got you earlier. He remembers because he didn't get one, he saw you receive the red boxes with happiness. The memory brought a strange sensation to his chest, almost as if he drowned, and it burned—stinging even.

“Poky,” you mumbled with the chocolate-covered sweet sticking from your lips. Mikey saw your soft skin surround the stick, and the pressure on his chest increased. Was he... jealous? Of sweets? Of the way you held them? Swallowed?

Yes. The answer was yes. As stupid as it sounded, Mikey wanted what the poky stick was feeling.

“Want some,” Mikey moved from his place behind the desk, turning your chair and hovering over your form. Without a warning, Mikey dropped his mouth over yours, teeth scraping your lips as his tongue searched for the chocolate biscuit. “More,” he said, already swallowed what you previously held in between your lips.

Mikey’s fingers searched the plastic bag for a second stick. As soon as his fingers held one, he fastly placed it in your mouth; once again, he lunged at you with enthusiasm. This time, once he had your mouth feeding his, a hand sneaked behind your skull and pressed you harder against him.

You were surprised at first; he looked so calm not even a second ago. Now, he had you panting for air—mouth latching on to yours. You were sure that if you weren't seated, your knees would have given up on you with the strength and fervor that Mikey was applying at every kiss, every swap of his tongue, every moan that he released in your mouth.

Mikey was almost seated on your lap by now, your neck tilted back so he could have better access to your swollen lips. He kept repeating the word more, placing another cookie stick and diving in once again. You weren't aware of the mewls and whines you yourself let out, nor how Mikey was using you for himself, you were lost in Mikey’s overwhelming activity.

The two of you were so lost in the moment that no one saw Sanzu step into the office and freeze at the sight in front of him. Mikey on top of you, bending your head—mouth joined together. You... moaning, squirming as your hands clutched Mikey’s shirt. Sanzu couldn't help but watch—watch his boss try to consume you all, and you? letting Mikey do as he pleased. When suddenly, the pinknette saw Mikey’s hand sneak in between your legs and pull... A pocky?

“What are you doing?!” screamed Sanzu in horror. “That’s not how it’s done!”

Five minutes later and some less than colorful words from Mikey to Sanzu, you were shirtless, braless and facing Mikey. With Sanzu standing behind you, his hands pressing your boobs together as Mikey placed a pocky in between them.

“See? This is more fun,” spoke Sanzu, giving your tits a little squeeze and making his rough palms rub your nipples. You squirmed at his ministrations, resting your head on Sanzu’s hard chest.

Mikey hummed in agreement with his second in command. Sanzu’s eyes twinkled in joy; it was killing two birds with one stone. The pink-haired man got to hold you close, play with your chest and make his boss happy. What else could he ask for?

“Hold her still,” Mikey ordered.

“Yes, boss,” Sanzu happily chirped.

“Wait! Mikey! Do- d- don't smash your head in!” you spoke, scared that he might lose an eye.

Too late, Mikey, in one gulp, took the pocky in as his face rubbed against your soft skin. Sanzu didn't stay still eight. He kneaded your boobs over Mikey’s face. The more Mikey shoved himself against your chest, the more your body was crushed against Sanzu’s.

And again, for being assassins and criminals, they sure didn't pay attention to their surroundings because they didn't see Kokonoi, Kakucho, and Takeomi walking in.

“What are you two doing to Y/N!?” Kokonoi made himself known.

“Playing the pocky game,” Sanzu answered, never moving his eyes from you and Mikey.

The three men looked at each other, and it was evident to everyone present what was the only option left.

“Do you have strawberry flavor? Or matcha?” asked Kakucho as he approached the two.

“Banana, I like that one,” followed Takeomi.

“Is there cookies and cream? I don't fancy the chocolate ones,” Kokonoi hurried over and began scanning your bag.

The next day at the office, you were sore, and tired. And you made it your job to evade the five men from yesterday. That's why you were hiding in Rindou’s office.

“Hey, Y/N! Did you like the pocky box? Would you like me to get more?” Mochi’s voice appeared out of nowhere, making you jump from under Rindou’s desk.

“Oh! No! I mean! Yes! But no more!” you frantically answered, moving towards the door and leaving without further explanation.

Mochi assumed you liked them because he saw all the empty boxes in Mikey’s trashcan.

As you ran down the hall, you collided with someone. Looking up, you saw Ran. The older haitani smiled at you, but before you could mutter a word, Rindou called your name from behind his brother; the youngest haitani was holding a bag full of pocky boxes.

“We heard about yesterday! Can I put one between your thighs?” Rindou shook the bag, indicating what he wanted to place on your tighs.

“No!” you bolted away, running the other way around.

Mochi exited Rindou’s office and saw the Haitani brother chasing you. He remembers the silence that used to reign over this place, the monotony of their lives. He was happy you were around.

#omi.answers #omificstags #bonten x reader #tokyorev smut #sano mikey manjiro x reader #sanzu haruchiyo x you #kokonoi hajime x y/n #Tokyo revengers crackfic #kakucho hitto #akashi takeomi #rindou Haitani #ran Haitani #mochizuki kanji #anon #tw food play #tw food #omi.dih

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spicysoftsweet · 2 years

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cw: minors dni, crack, dom!takemichi????, crime against fashion, this is a takemichi roast

a/n: i don’t want to hear it i do not respect this man do not say anything to me

“Can I use your bathroom, ‘Michi?” You call out from another room filled with far too many open and half filled boxes. Your voice echoes surprisingly loudly throughout the apartment, and it almost startles you.

This new apartment was bigger than you expected.

Well, anything would be big compared to that shoebox Takemichi used to live in, you think. You don’t hear Takemichi’s answer, and you wonder if he’s still in his bedroom, unpacking dutifully as you expect him to. There’s way too many damn boxes.

For someone who (rightfully) claimed to be broke so often, Takemichi had quite a bit of shit to move out. Old dishes, cracked mugs, magazines, old photos, you name it. Happy to be free of sorting through nonsense for a couple minutes, you make your way to the bathroom just right of his bedroom, only to find him smiling at himself looking in the mirror.

He’s wearing the worst fit you’ve ever seen in your life.

Hearing your footsteps approaching, he turns to look at you grinning widely, hands shoved in the pockets of red shorts that are far too tight in the wrong places with the words OUTLAW written boldly in black letters. His shirt is too tight, bursting at the single button he’s managed to close, and not in a sexy way.

The $5 sunglasses are possibly the worst part.

“It still fits!” He exclaims.

Whatever this is, you reject it immediately.

“No.” The words come out before you can completely register the outfit, and you close the door on him, turning into the bathroom instead.

“Come on, babe!” You hear him whine from the other side. Before you can slam the bathroom door to finally get some relief (and maybe some rest from whatever emotional warfare he’s playing), he’s pulled you out by the arm.

For someone who has been known not to be particularly good at fighting, he’s surprisingly strong. It’s probably every single punch he’s taken throughout his lifetime.

“Come onnnn, don’t deny I look good,” he insists.

“Absolutely not,” you reply, lips pressing into a thin line as you twist out of his grasp.

“You know you want a piece of this!” he banters with confidence. If you could throw up, you would. The clothes make you physically ill.

Your face twists in disgust and you press a threatening finger at his chest.

“Not a chance in hell.”

---

Takemichi isn’t anything if not persistent.

“F-fuck, it feels so g-good,” Takemichi sighs, and you can feel the shudder of his entire body through the thick cock between your lips. He’s grabby as usual and his hands make their way into your hair, attempting to press you down further, enough that your forehead presses against the skin of his belly.

You should bite the fuck out of him, you think. Your lips open, and his cock snaps back with a wet thwock sound as it slaps flush against him. The bastard is so eager and to be quite honest, you’ve never seen someone grow as thick and as hard as he does. He has to win somewhere.

But he’s still wearing the damn shorts.

“Please take those off,” you beg, getting up from your knees and moving forward so that you can straddle him on the single armchair he owns, the only piece of furniture decorating this new place. You figure you’re going to have to take his ass to IKEA too.

His hands wrap around your waist as you settle onto him, a soft suppressed whimper leaving you as you descend onto his shaft. The way he just worms his way into you is so fucking irritating, but when he moves… let’s say contempt is not the only thing you’re feeling.

It doesn’t take long for you to be screaming his name as he puts force under every upward thrust. That wretched shirt has fallen apart by now and the sunglasses are off, halfway up his face, and the damn shorts are down to his ankles.

At least with your face buried into the meat of his neck you can’t see this disaster of an outfit.

“Say it,” he insists.

“I’ll k-kill you before I say it...” you mutter in reply, despite holding back tears and embarrassed at the high pitch your voice has taken. You’re still holding on tight.

Always rapt for a challenge, he speeds up, and he’s nearly standing out of the chair as he bucks his hips up and one lucky stroke knocks you in the place that has your eyes rolling back behind your head and your pussy clenching desperately around him like you’re the needy one.

Takemichi can nearly hear the bell of a boxing match as your breath hitches and you cum violently. It’s almost criminal.

“Say it.” His tone only gets assertive when you’re still quivering as you come down. His hold is so anxious, it’s oppressive and he’s almost shaking with anticipation.

“My sexy outlaw,” you moan in defeat. It’s the worst day of your life.

#takemichi x reader #takemichi hanagaki x reader #takemichi smut #tokyo revengers x reader #not sfw #mae.writing #tokyo revengers smut #takemichi hanagaki smut #takemichi x you #crackfic

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micro-after-dark · 3 years

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Blog Navi!

This blog contains and interacts with dark content. Minors, Ageless and blank blogs will be blocked

Rules

About me

Tags

SFW Blog

Tokyo Revengers Masterlist

Tokyo Revengers Crackfics Masterlist

BNHA Masterlist

@bitchcraftinc member!

666 post break image by @/racingairplanes

#navi #minors dni

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tsuriaa · 2 years

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꒷⁩ ࣪˖ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐌𝐄 —

REIGNA OR MIRIA • SHE/HER • INFP • BISEXUAL • AQUARIUS • MINOR • ASIAN !

FANDOMS: TWST, GENSHIN, TOKYO REVENGERS, ENSEMBLE STARS, TMNT & PROJECT SEKAI !

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐒 ♡ —

• LOVABLE IDIOT (TWST X GENSHIN; MULTIPLE CHAPTERS; ROM-COM; FILO!READER)

• THE DEFENDER OF JUSTICE (TOKYO REVENGERS; MULTIPLE CHAPTERS; CRACKFIC; 707!READER

— 𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 !

DISCORD; WATTPAD; SIDE BLOG; TWITTER; PLAYLISTS; TAGS; USERNAME CREDITS

all works belongs to @/tsuriaa !!

#[ profile navigation ! ]#[ introduction <3 ]

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fic-dumpster · 2 years

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DIH | Lady boner

Bonten x F!Reader | 802 words

Warnings: suggestive, implied head, nonsense, not edited, Mochi isn’t here today. My sitcom crackfic is back :D with uh... this. Reader has an uterus. Mention of menstruation. Bonten being Bonten with Doe. Reference to other stories in the series, inside jokes with some of you.. 😂🫂

A/N: this is an apology 😵‍💫💕🤧🥺🫂 because I’ve been posting so many color palettes xD and now I feel guilty hehe

Was there a way to say it? Would they misunderstand? And many more thoughts crossed your mind while you stood by your door.

Their morning chatter was a background sound to your turbulent mind, but you couldn't help it. The uncomfortable sensation in between your legs didn't let you think straight. You have been horny before, but not like this. Maybe having someone to take care of it had a different effect on your body.

Hormones and probably your period coming next week were good indicators of what had you rubbing your thighs together. You peeked again to see how to approach them, more like who. Telling your horny situation to everyone wasn't going to help get a fast solution; they would end up arguing. As your thoughts continued to wander, a single red eye saw your head peering through the doorframe.

“Y/N, you’re awake, come eat before it gets cold,” Kakucho said, making everyone aware of your presence.

Right now, you could care less about the food, “I’m not hungry-” you were interrupted by multiple voices.

“Nonsense. Y/N, you need to eat,” that was Takeomi.

“Are you feeling alright? Should I call the doctor?” a concerned Kokonoi put down his phone to stare at your head, still peeking from the door.

“Do you want something else? I can get anything you want for breakfast,” Ran was already standing up and looking for his car keys.

“Kakucho cooked; I know you like his food,” Mikey added.

“I can make something else,” mumbled Kakucho, putting the pink apron back on.

“We can have breakfast on the balcony,” said Rindou.

“I can feed you,” Sanzu just wanted to make that clear.

All his voices full of concern made you feel dizzy, it was overwhelming; the throbbing pain on your slit didn't help either, so your following action was out of desperation.

Stalking up to the nearest person, in this case, Rindou, who sat on the couch, you pulled his arm. Almost making him fall on his face from the strength of your sudden movement, “I am horny! Okay?! My- My pussy hurts! And you!” You pointed your finger at Rindou. He looked like a scared puppy being scolded by his owner, “are gonna help me!” You pushed the younger haitani inside your room, slamming the door behind your back.

Everything happened so fast. A deep silence was left behind. Six men looked at the closed door, baffled by your sudden outburst. Not only that, but you were unaware of what your words implicated. Every single man in that room would be glad to help you in your predicament.

“She took my brother,” Ran broke the silence, not believing what just transpired.

“She took your brother!” Sanzu screamed, feeling hurt that you chose Rindou instead of him.

Before anyone else could say anything else, your loud moans invaded the area, making everyone still in the room. In any other situations, you would have been a little quieter, but as frustration grew, so did your screams of pleasure.

“What the hell is Rindou doing?” Kokonoi murmured as the sound of your voice began to affect him.

“Is it me, or is she getting bolder?” Takeomi asked, remembering how you took Rindou a few minutes ago.

“Like you’re not desperate when you have a hard-on,” Kakucho countered, defending your actions.

“Fuck this,” Sanzu said in rage; he stood up and marched up to your door, banging his fist against the hard surface, “Rindou, let me in!” Kakucho, Ran, and Mikey observed the pinknette fight the door.

“He’s busy!” You cried out.

“Sweetcheeks, that's not-” Sanzu groaned at the situation, pants tight; he didn't want to wait, “Rindou, don't ignore me, for fuck’s sake.”

“His mouth is busy- ack!! Rindou!!” You gripped the younger haitani’s head, grinding harder against his face. Rindou wasn't even paying attention to the men outside that door, solely focused on his current task.

“Sanzu,” Mikey called after his number two, “break the door.” Sanzu’s eyes sparkled back to life at his boss's order.

“Koko, we’re waiting again; it's better to let them have their moment,” Takeomi said as he observed how Ran and Kakucho joined Sanzu at your door, and Mikey stood behind them, watching their work.

“I think you're right,” Kokonoi began to type on his phone, once again having to buy another door for your place, “You think I should buy in bulk? I could get a discount,” he mumbled to Takeomi.

“Perhaps that’s a good idea,” Takeomi contemplated the scene unfolding in front of him. Door down. Sanzu... dragging Rindou out by the leg. Kakucho, Ran, and Mikey stepping in, your scream at the commotion, your slipper hitting Ran in the face.

A typical morning at your place, Takeomi thought as he walked to the window, pulling his cigarettes out.

#omi.dih #bonten x reader #Tokyo revengers crackfic #Sanzu Haruchiyo #sano mikey Manjiro #ran Haitani #rindou haitani x y/n #kakucho hitto #tw menstruation #tokyorev x you #fluff #hajime kokonoi #akashi takeomi #omificstags

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fic-dumpster · 2 years

Text

DIH | Confidence looks good on you

Bonten x F!Reader | 2.2k+ Words

Warnings: Sitcome 😌, crackfic, semi-nakedness, suggestive, humor, possessiveness 👀, nonsense xD, doe gets a confidence boost, Senju. Not edited, no beta.

A/N: I’m trying a new format for long answers :D

“Are you sure about this?” you asked, thinking of the many different ways this could go wrong.

“Yeah, it will be fine, don't worry,” she showed you a reassuring smile that didn't help much in soothing your nerves.

“Senju, I don’t know,” Why was it so hard? Her brother had seen you in less, “what if Sanzu doesn’t like… something?”

“See? You don’t even know what he wouldn’t like because you know he loves you,” the truth was simple. Still, you had a weird feeling about this.

“But-”

“No buts! Go! Peace offering, go!” and off you were, with a task in mind. To convince Sanzu to spend some family time with his siblings.

As you walked into the Bonten building, you ignored a minor detail. The issue wasn’t going to be Sanzu not liking the surprise Senju was sending him, but if the surprise even arrives at its destiny. Because as soon as a pair of purple orbs saw your legs cross the entrance, his pants tightened.

Rindou forgot what he was doing downstairs; something about retrieving important paperwork. That didn’t matter right now, though; your bare legs and high heels… Rindou followed you like a moth to a flame. It took him less than a minute to reach you; after all, Rindou did run to you, not giving a single fuck if someone saw a Bonten executive running like a mad man.

You never saw Rindou coming, but you felt his grip on your elbow, turning you around and…

“Rindou, no!” You clapped your hand on his lips, knowing full well that if he kissed you now, you wouldn’t be able to find Sanzu. Taking advantage of the surprise your action caused him, you freed your elbow and ran towards the elevator as fast as you could master with high heels on.

“Y/N, come back here!” Rindou was chasing you, and by miracle, someone held the elevator’s doors open for you. Just before the youngest Haitani could reach you, the elevator’s doors closed on his face. Rindou was left banging on the metal doors.

“Why were you running away from Rindou?” A familiar rough voice made you jump; cursing under your breath, you spun around, and there he stood in all his naked-chest-glory, Kakucho.

As you were about to answer, you noticed his cheeks reddening, and his eye skimmed through your body. “What-” a cold breeze hit your exposed abdomen, and you could guess what made Kakucho blush. You suspected the fast movement from the chase resulted in the belt loosening and, well, this. “To be fair, you’re always shirtless,” you said as you gave your back to him and tried to fix your... outfit.

Giving your back? Wrong move. “That explains Rindou’s maniac chase,” two large hands held yours, stopping your movements, “I take this isn't meant for him, then,” Kakucho’s left hand went inside the coat, sensing the heat of his palm on your stomach your body recoiled in hopes of getting some distance from his scalding touch. Your back hit his hard chest, and you knew that if you didn't stop him right now, you'd end up being split open against the elevator’s cold metal walls. Kakucho could lift you so effortlessly—cock so deep....

“Stop, stop, stop,” you didn't know if you said that to yourself or the wandering hands under your coat, “this is not for you either,” you said, prying off his hands and fastly fastening your belt. You felt him deflate behind you. Thinking about it, giving your back was a good idea because you knew that behind you stood a sad puppy-looking Kakucho, and as soon as you saw his pleading face, you would break.

“Lucky bastard,” even if you two weren't doing anything, Kakucho didn't move an inch away from you; he wouldn’t touch but good it was hard to stay away knowing what lays under that coat. And just before he could say anything else, the doors opened, revealing a busy-looking Kokonoi, scanning some thin notebook and... Ran? Was that Ran behind that pile of papers?

“Are we interrupting?” Kokonoi said as he looked up.

“No...” of course, he didn't believe that. Not when Kakucho was practically cornering you in an empty elevator. The latter, looking very flustered.

“Don’t care, Koko, get the fuck in,” Ran practically groaned from the weight of the documents he was carrying, “fucking Rindou, disappearing, leaving me with all-” Ran kept cursing at his brother as he and Kokonoi stepped in.

“Stop that elevator!” you froze; you knew where that scream came from, or more like from whom it came from. You peeked outside of the metal door and saw a disheveled-looking Rindou who seemed to have taken the emergency stairs of the building, and he saw your head pop out of the machine, “Y/N!!! I wanna see what’s under that coat!!!!”

Seeing Rindou approach you like a maniac, crazed look on, you shivered and frantically bolted inside. Your finger continuously smashed the closing-door button on the panel, and once again, metal doors met the younger haitani’s nose.

“Do I wanna know?” asked Kokonoi.

“Probably no,” Kakucho responded.

“Well, I do,” Ran wanted to see what his brother meant, “Kakucho, hold the papers for a second.”

“Kaku-chan! Do not hold the papers!” you whirled around, knowing how the eldest Haitani would react. Kakucho stood in the middle of you and Ran, bickering back and forth. Ran’s head was barely visible from the side of the tower of papers.

“Ran, for the last time, no!” You said.

“What are you? His owner?” Ran countered.

“Yes!” you said without thinking, fueled by the heat of the discussion, “And yours! And yours too!” You pointed at Kokonoi and Ran. Three men were shocked. If you looked closer, you could have seen steam scaping their ears. Brains had shut down.

“Ah fuck, you can’t say something like that... Out of nowhere,” Kakucho looked up, taking big gulps of air, trying to calm his heart. Kokonoi retracted to a corner; he was agitated, cheeks red, pulse-quickening.

Ran Haitani could no longer take it. Letting go of the big pile of documents, he stalked up to you. Papers flew everywhere in the elevator; in any normal circumstances, Kokonoi would have scolded Ran, but he, too, was curious. And the latter could not get out of the earlier revelation; your voice still resonated in his head.

The little confidence you had fled as soon as you held eye contact with purple orbs. Mischief sparkled in Ran’s eyes; you looked like a deer caught in headlights—big doe eyes looking at the menace of a man in front of you.

And for the last time today, metal doors saved your ass from a Haitani. They opened, and you flew out. Never in your life had you thought you would be running in only a coat and underwear in a million-dollar building. Ran followed after you.

Kokonoi and Kakucho glanced at each other, and they simultaneously exited the elevator, chasing after you too.

“What is under the coat?” Asked Kokonoi, already on Ran’s heels.

“Lace underwear!” Kakucho’s voice reached not only Kokonoi but Ran too. The eldest Haitani roared at the new information, frustration filling his gut; he was so close to you back in the elevator.

The perk of being the boss is that nobody questions their actions, even when stampeding after someone. And the same applied to you, the one who is dating them, all of them.

You couldn't run like this; the heels were killing you; they weren't meant to be used in a high-speed pursuit. In a flash, you took them off and without thinking, a common action of yours lately, you threw them at the closes man, Ran.

“Don’t throw your shoes at me!” screamed the eldest Haitani

“Stop chasing me then!” You retorted, internally wishing for a way out of this predicament. Sanzu better say yes.

Salvation comes in many different forms. In your case, in the form of Kanji Mochizuki, who was standing in the middle of the hall, minding his own business. The big man saw your panicked face and the three men running after you. No words were exchanged; there was no need. Mochi knew you needed help, so he charged after your pursuers.

Kakucho stopped dead in his tracks, perceiving the outcome if they clashed, but a new body joined in his place. Rindou had caught up. That didn't change Mochi’s objective. The next thing he did, left you speechless. You couldn't believe how Mochi seized the three men. Ran, Rindou, and Kokonoi in the middle; the three were tackled by Mochi; four bodies hit the ground, and Kakucho stood there watching as the men he worked with for so long were wrestling on the floor.

“Mochi, let me go!!” Screamed Kokonoi, his white-silver hair was a mess, some covering Ran’s face and Rindou pulling it as the latter tried to push Mochi.

“I’m sorry!” You shouted, not looking back as you turned a corner, making your way towards the emergency stairs.

Only two floors left, and you would reach Sanzu’s office. Why the hell was Sanzu in his office, he rarely stayed there, and just when you needed him the most, the pinknette had to be on the last floor.

“Fucking Sanzu,” you wanted nothing more than to rest. Why did this day seem to be so complicated?

“Language,” the sudden voice behind you made you stumble, barely holding on to the handrails.

“Takeomi? Oh my god, I almost passed out,” the man carried a cigarette, standing near the railings was the eldest Akashi sibling, “aren’t there areas for smoking in the building?” you pointed out.

“Here is more... peaceful,” or it used to be because as soon as Takeomi said that, you heard Rindou scream your name, “I’m gonna guess this has something to do with Senju’s plan?” You nodded, “go, I’ll distract him,” Takeomi gave one lass drag to his cigarette before dropping the white cylinder—his expensive shoe stepping on it. Takeomi knew the younger haitani had an advantage, but he wasn't looking for a win; Takeomi just needed to give you time.

“Thank you!!” and off you were once again.

It took you less than you expected to reach your destination. Almost making the door fly off its hinges, you saw Sanzu sitting on his desk, literally on the table, “Sanzu!!” your hands flew towards your belt, “Sanzu!” Barefoot, you quickened your pace.

“Y/N?” the pinknette was happy to see you, but what were you doing? “Sweetcheeks, what’s wrong? Weren't you with Senju to-” Sanzu was cut short; he couldn't mutter a single word after he saw what was inside your coat. This was unprecedented; you were always so... shy... but this was good, this was more than good. Was he dreaming?

“Just take your peace offering before any of the others do,” you tossed the coat away, walking in as if you owned the place; in a way, you did own it. You owned them.

Sanzu kept blinking, not believing you just walked in, throwing your clothes, lace underwear on, only for him. He was sure he hadn’t taken any pills today; hallucinations were impossible. You were walking too fast; his reaction was too slow.

“So?” you felt a pinch of uncertainty; was it too much? Did Sanzu not like it? “Sanzu!?” You poked his shoulder, and it was like you flipped a switch; in a blink of an eye, your back hit the surface of the desk, blue eyes swirled with desire.

“Couldn't you have waited after the meeting?” The pink-haired man breathed in your neck, hands roaming your exposed figure.

“Can someone explain what’s going on?” Mikey asked, looking around at his executives. The scheduled meeting was not going as he had planned. Nobody was paying attention to anything. Kokonoi’s hair was a mess, Takeomi held a pack of ice on his left eye, Ran and Mochi seemed to be in the middle of a staredown, Kakucho had Rindou tied down, and... “Why is Y/N in her underwear on Sanzu’s lap?!”

“Told you I should have kept the coat!” you smacked Sanzu’s chest.

“No, I like to show you off,” Sanzu was proudly nestling you in his arms—big hands pressing you against him.

“Stop squeezing her ass!” Rindou groaned in irritation.

“No,” Sanzu smirked, smacking your ass. A yelp left your lip; The pinknette was digging his own grave. Death was a pretty decent future by the looks the rest of the men were throwing his way.

Fun Facts!

- Kakucho was coming behind Rindou, and Takeomi asked for his help. The deal was that he also gets invited to the Akashi’s family time because apparently, you were going too.

- Mikey did not like that Sanzu had a special gift. He was pouting like a child.

- Mikey was not amazed by Kakucho having Rindou tied up. That was the most normal of it all.

- Mochi felt bad for Kokonoi but not about the Haitani brothers. He would seek revenge. Not to mention that Rindou escaped him.

- Senju didn't get a response from Sanzu, which was, in a sense, a yes in her eyes.

- Kokonoi demanded to go shopping with you. He wanted to buy more lace... Everyone agreed.

#omi.dih #bonten x reader #tokyorev fanfiction #tokyo revengers au #Sanzu Haruchiyo x y/n #ran Haitani #sano mikey manjiro #mochizuki kanji #kakucho hitto fluff #Rindou Haitani x you #Kokonoi Hajime #Akashi Takeomi #tr crackfic #humor #omificstags

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fic-dumpster · 2 years

Text

DEER IN HEADLIGHTS

Pairings: Bonten x Reader

Warnings: Reverse harem, canon divergent, Crackfic, sitcome, foul language, blood, violence, smut in certain short stories, fluff, angst, jealousy, shitty behavior kinda toxic (pls they are criminals), issues, grammar mistakes, no beta. INCOMPLETE AF.

Contains more than 80 links

Deer in headlights -> Main masterlist || 20+ chaps

DIHU -> Headcanons/Asks Masterlist || 38 posts

One-shots <- Masterlist || 35 chaps

Fan FanArts ^^

Last update on: Dic 11, 2021

General masterlist from fic-dumpster

Spotify collaborative playlist! Add songs that remind you of DIH! shy about adding a song? You can send an ask and I’ll add it^^

#omi.masterlist #post for my Navi because it’s easier to find the links like this 😂💕#omi.dih #bonten x reader #deer in headlights #DIHU #tokyorev smut #tr crackfic #tokyo revengers fluff #Sanzu Haruchiyo x reader #sano mikey manjiro x reader #kokonoi hajime x reader #ran haitani x reader #rindou haitani x reader #kakucho hitto x reader #Mochizuki kanji x y/n platonic #Spotify

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fic-dumpster · 2 years

Text

Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss

Bonten x Omi (me fic-dumpster) | 2k+ words

Summary: Bonten tries to rescue his boss, but nothing comes without a price. Will they succeed?

Warnings: CrackFic, she pronoun, slight description of reader, based on asks and jokes about me gatekeeping Mikey from DIH, nonsense, idk, vegetables. Tbh, it can be an x reader fic... I tried to make it as reader insert as possible. Breaking the fourth wall(?) not really. my irrational fear of Ran Haitani. Shirtless Kakucho.

A/N: an inside joke... Omg, WE HAVE INSIDE JOKES! I don't know if this is a self-ship(I dont think it is), but uh, whatever 😂😂 it's a joke... @sno-leopards your comment make me laugh, and this is the result ty! XD Also, this is a promise that I will do more Mikey from now on. I cant believe I wrote 2K+ words of a joke. As you can see I take my clownery seriously.

This meeting was crucial. Seven men walked towards the meeting point; never have they faced a problem like this one. Bonten needed to negotiate his boss's freedom.

They didn't know their enemy, but for Mikey to be held captive for so long, she must be a strong adversary. Sanzu tried to gather information, and the only thing he could get was a genre and a nickname. Omi.

The abandoned building they stepped into was empty, except for a table and three chairs. None dared to move a muscle in fear of a surprise attack. Having no info on the enemy left them at a significant disadvantage. But they had no other option; Mikey’s life was at risk.

“Sit down; I’m not gonna hurt anyone,” a female voice came from behind them. A young girl in her early twenties walked in, straight black hair, a pair of brown hair clips adorned her head. She wore jeans, sneakers, and a lavender short sleeve top.

“Ladies first,” Ran Haitani was the first one to speak.

“Oh, so you’re one of those,” she gave him a knowing look.

“One of those what?” asked Ran, not understanding what she meant.

“Of... Those,” and she kept walking, more like walking fast trying to run away from the intimidating man.

“What does she mean of those?” Ran whispered, asking none in particular, but his brother, Rindou, heard him.

“Of those,” repeated the younger Haitani, mocking his brother’s cluelessness.

As she sat at the table she had prepared earlier that day, she saw the men in front of her hesitate. The one with a red eye scanned the room. Kakucho, she placed a name to a face.

“When is your boss arriving?” A rough-looking man questioned. Dyed blond hair and weirdly shaped eyebrows. He must be Mochizuki; again, she began to recognize them from Mikey’s description of his men.

“There is no boss, just me,” the black-haired girl calmly answered, as calm as one can be when surrounded by seven menacing figures.

“There is no way you have Mikey,” silver hair, fox-like eyeliner. So that’s Kokonoi, she thought, another name to another face. She couldn't help but notice he was slightly shorter than her.

“Sorry to disappoint, but yes, I have your boss.”

Takeomi was indeed disappointed; he couldn't imagine doing all they had planned to such a normal-looking girl. She didn't give any threatening vibe. He could break her with a finger.

“No, you don't,” the pinknette retorted. He couldn't believe she had his boss.

She saw the striking pink color. Was it Sanzu? According to Mikey’s specific description of this one, pink hair is Sanzu. She eyes him from head to toe.

“You’re cute,” a high-pitched sound escaped the pink-haired individual at her sudden response. And behind him, Rindou couldn't help but laugh, only to be elbowed by Ran.

“Then release our boss,” Kakucho ignored her comment and Sanzu’s tomato face, “what are your demands?”

“What?” She was taken aback by his question.

“Give us your price,” Kokonoi pulled a chair and sat down, staring back at the young woman and expecting some inhumane amount of money as an answer. Kakucho followed Kokonoi’s action and sat next to him.

Mimicking them, she also took a seat. Nervousness ran through her body, but she needed to pretend. After all, this was something she agreed to do.

“Okay, my price,” she was breaking her brain, thinking of a price, because, in all honesty, this is not how it was supposed to go, “one of you will take his place,”

All men present froze at her words; none saw it coming. After a couple of minutes in silence, one of them answered.

Without hesitation, Takeomi Akashi replied. “Who do you want?” it wasn't a yes, but it wasn't a no. He wanted more information before agreeing with your terms.

“That’s up to you,” but everyone noticed how she eyed Sanzu, and the pinknette has never been more scared in his life. If this person could take on Mikey, he didn't want to know what she had stored for him. He wasn't going to let her appearance fool him. As nonthreatening as she looked, there had to be more.

“You’re like a cat’s paw,” it flew out of Sanzu’s mouth by accident.

“Excuse me?”

“You look all fluffy, but if I press enough, I bet your claws come out!” now, Sanzu did it.

Kokonoi, Takeomi, Mochi, and Kakucho couldn't believe Sanzu just said that in a serious negotiation. As for the Haitani brothers, both were dying of laughter at the back of the group. What was happening with their number two? None in bonten had ever seen him behave so strange.

“Thank you?” Now she was lost; was this for real, or were they poking fun at her?

“Don’t mind him, just choose one,” Kakucho once again took the lead on the negotiations, “not him, please not him, for your own good,” and it was partially true. Kakucho was expecting to make Mochi hold Sanzu back from shooting the captor, but the menace he knew was a blushing mess at the back.

Takeomi, who had been quiet for a while, noticed something. The more of a threat they were, the more she seemed to like them. And the more dangerous, the more they submitted. Things were beginning to fall into place. He could understand how Mikey fell in her trap.

“How about I show you where Mikey is and then I choose?” She wasn’t going to choose one of them, but they didn’t need to know that.

Kokonoi and Kakucho agreed and as everyone walked out of the area, Ran and Rindou discussed who was she going to choose. Rindou placed his money on Sanzu since she had called the pinknette cute. But Ran argued that she could choose him, because, according to him, Ran Haitani was her type. And everyone rolled their eyes as his statement, including the young woman walking ahead.

“Oh…” she stopped on her tracks, facepalming herself for forgetting such a big detail.

“What’s wrong?” Takeomi, the one who was closer to her, asked with concern as he saw her face frown and, well, hit herself in the face.

“I didn’t drive here, I took the bus, mind if I ride with someone?”

“We could kill you,” Rindou voiced from the back.

“Wanna see your boss or not?” She hastily turned around to face the purplenette.

“Good point,” Ran hit Rindou at the back of his head, “you’ve hit me twice today!” and both brothers kept bickering as everyone got into their cars.

For safety reasons, according to Kakucho, you ended up seated with Kokonoi in Takeomi’s car.

“Wait, so you’re Omi?” asked Kokonoi as he clasped his seatbelt.

“Yeah,”

“No, I’m Omi,” Takeomi attempted to make a joke out of the situation and the fact that you both shared a nickname.

“No, I am Omi,” but she didn't take it like that because, in the rearview mirror, Takeomi saw her serious face and fastly changed the subject.

“So, where to?”

“Nice building,” Whistled the older Haitani looking at the fancy-looking tower, “how can you afford this?”

“My job pays well,” Omi shrugged as she led them inside, nodding at the receptionist, who almost passed out at the flock of big tattooed men walking after her. “By the way, didn't you have a shirt on?” She asked Kakucho, who now only had a coat on.

“Does it bother you?” asked back, the now shirtless man.

“No, it's okay. I’m sorry if I stare, though.” at her words, Takeomi rapidly closed Kakucho’s coat. He didn't know why it bothered him that she did so. Also, now that Takeomi gave it a thought, why was Kakucho shirtless now?

A very uncomfortable elevator trip began, it was a 50 floors trip, and Unchained Melody played in the speakers. And well, seven men and the fact that one was shirtless didn't help the atmosphere.

“You must be joking,” Omi murmured to herself as she stared at the security camera on the corner of the elevator. She could feel the men moving anxiously behind her, and Sanzu started humming at some point.

After such an unforgettable elevator trip, Omi’s entrance opened; she let everyone in, not before scolding them for their shoes. Multiple apologies rained on her.

“Omi?” Mikey’s voice interrupted everyone’s actions, and suddenly, Rindou held Omi as Ran and Sanzu darted inside the house in search of their boss. Takeomi, Mochi, Kokonoi, and Kakucho were left speechless at the plan they were not informed of.

“Let me go!” the young woman struggled against Rindou’s grip, scared of what would happen if...

A loud crash resounded in the apartment, and Sanzu flew against a wall while Ran ducked the flying human.

“Omi?!?!” Once again, Mikey called after her. His head popped in the entrance hall, and as soon as he saw the rest of his executives there and Rindou holding the black-haired girl, he snapped.

Some grunts and hits later, everyone sat in her living room, except for Mikey, who was in the kitchen doing god knows what—some of the executives were groaning, and others just pretending that nothing happened since the ones with injuries were the Haitani brothers and Sanzu. Nothing out of the ordinary.

“Okay, so we’re leaving now?” Let-out Kakucho, still trying to grasp the situation.

“No, I’m not leaving,” answered their boss from the kitchen, “I like it here.”

“Come again?” Said Sanzu, holding a pack of frozen peas against his head.

“She’s gaslighting you!!” Screamed Rindou from the other side of the couch, with a pack of frozen baby carrots on his left eye.

“Am not!!” Omi screamed back, “give me my baby carrots back!!”

“No!”

“Rindou, stop fighting her,” sighed Takeomi, seeing as the purplenette was about to stand up.

“I was a good jailer, okay?” Omi said as a joke as she passed a bag of cold nuggets to Ran.

“So he wasn't in a basement?” asked the older Haitani before thanking her for the bag, and placing it on his shoulder.

“Nor chained?” followed Mochi

“What? No? Why would I?” she frowned at their questions.

“He was here because he wanted?” now it was Kokonoi, continuing where Mochi left off.

“Nothing against his will?” Kakucho had to make sure.

“Oh my god! I’m not a criminal!!” Omi exclaimed without realizing to whom she was saying that.

“Stop bothering her,” Mikey came in with a bowl of soft sugar cookies, “She cooks well and smells better than all of you.”

“What? I wash all your clothes!” Sanzu was hurt.

“Maybe add softener; it changes lives,”

After discussing cleaning products with Sanzu and unexpectedly Mochi too, Kokonoi reminded everyone of the deal. One stays so Mikey could go. At first, their boss refused such a deal, saying that it didn't matter because he was never held captive. But then, not only Kokonoi pressed to it, Takeomi, Sanzu, and Ran did too.

Mikey had no other choice but to agree, only with the condition that as soon as he finished his business, he could come back and kick out whoever was replacing him. With that, even Kakucho nodded.

“But they all look scary! Big and scary!” Omi refused, formulating excuse after excuse, “I’m okay on my own!”

“You’re taller than Kokonoi; you can keep him,” Mikey spoke as if it was a good enough reason for you to choose the silver-haired man.

“You can keep him? What am I? A pet?” Kokonoi defended himself, but Takeomi noticed he didn't say no.

“I’m not scary!” began Ran, and a chorus of me neither and not me followed his statement.

“You’re blind, oh my god,” the poor girl was having a mental breakdown.

“Just choose one,” Mikey didn't like that his executives were going to stay there longer than needed, especially if you made cream pan.

But before Omi could answer, two voices spoke simultaneously, “I’ll stay,” and then the two of them looked at each other, never expecting this outcome.

“Issue fixed. Takeomi and Kakucho, both of you stay here,” Mikey agreed with the accident, then he went back to eating cookies.

“Then me too,” Ran added.

“No, you scare me,” Omi said as she ignored the looks both of her new... captives threw her way.

“Why?!”

“Because you’re one of those!!”

“Of those what?!?!!” Ran still didn't get it, and Rindou had to agree with Omi; his brother was scary sometimes.

#Mikey_was_released_2021 #i’m clowning by myself #omi x Bonten #okay no 😂😂😂😂💕💕#I even made a banner of Mikey in jail #bonten x reader #crackfic #tokyo revengers shitpost #tokyorev nonsense #sano mikey Manjiro #Akashi Takeomi #kakucho hitto #ran Haitani #rindou Haitani #Sanzu Haruchiyo #mochizuki kanji #hajime kokonoi #tr fluff #omificstags

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