a-sassy-bench

[a-sassy-bench]

sometimes i open tumblr when i'm waiting for the doctor or have a brief moment between meetings at work or whatever and then i see my dash and think "oh, yeah, this is the sexualizing that old man website and maybe not appropriate for public consumption"

then I remember that i curate my own dash and actually the problem is me

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#the call is coming from inside the house #cant tell you how many times ive scrolled past something real spicy as fast as i possibly can so no one sees my shame #and i always forget i have a giant photo of my embroidery of the word cunt right there on my profile #so i end up anxiety clicking to my profile only to open something equally inappropriate #and yet i keep doing it #oops #text post

[a-sassy-bench]

this has me in tears

#bg3

[a-sassy-bench]

look i'm not saying smoking/vaping is healthy or good or anything, all i'm saying is if you consistently go to the same gas station to buy nicotine you can create a world where a 7/11 employee will fight anyone who messes with you and that's beautiful

#i think at least two of the cashiers at my 7/11 would fight someone for me #and i love them for that #the power of nicotine #text post

[a-sassy-bench]

this is what working in mental health is like

#you have the most heart breaking conversation #or someone screams obscenities in your face #and then you gotta put that shit in a box so you can be helpful to the next person

[a-sassy-bench]

if the schadenfreude fits, you must acquit

Izzy haters: “Izzy is a powerhungry manipulative masterminding villain!”

Canon:

Izzy is a cringefail loser (/aff) who can’t even think of a more creative name for the Revenge than Izzy’s Revenge. Come on.

#ofmd #izzy hands

[a-sassy-bench]

larian please

A patre0n request

#bg3

[a-sassy-bench]

gif by @crucifiix

Writing is so much fun! You can be like "I should process this" and just go nuh-huh, see, I'm going to make up a guy and have them process it for me. Not me! It's the guy I made!

#ofmd

[a-sassy-bench]

that overwhelming feeling when the universe collapses in on itself, the crushing weight of atoms smashing into atoms, as matter condenses into a vacuum because none of the restaurants you like are taking delivery orders right now

#i had a bad day #i want a little treat #i'm having feelings about how all of creation doesn't want me to enjoy some bomb ass mashed potatoes and gravy today

[a-sassy-bench]

it is a crime against my person that all the breakfast restaurants close early

[a-sassy-bench]

i'm having a bad day week month year post-9/11

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#fuck capitalism #fuck my body #and definitely fuck that bitch carol from work

[a-sassy-bench]

she ain't watching shit. this hippocampus contains 9374837439 song lyrics and maybe 2 childhood memories max

i am immune from my own horrors

#epilepsy #neurological disability #neurodivergent #disabled #actually disabled #c punk #crip punk #cripple punk #memory loss

[a-sassy-bench]

The Gay Agenda™

The year is 1953, color has just been invented and you are on your way to deliver color to San Francisco. You are adding green to a row house when a homosexual comes up from behind and steals all the colors for himself.

[a-sassy-bench]

Based off of this post

#dying #dead #never to be revived #bg3 #bg3 gale

[a-sassy-bench]

i was moved by a post and the way it so perfectly captured all these complicated feelings i was having and then i saw... i wrote the post

neurological disabilities are wild

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#i am literally my own audience #fucking hippocampus #thank glob im entertained by myself lol #neurological disability #epilepsy #disabilties #disabled #actually disabled #neurodivergent #memory loss #text post

[a-sassy-bench]

Everyone go love this artist more, this is the best

Have had the scribble version of this since at least September but drawing Astarion’s hair is haaaard

Gale’s regular hair is tricky for me too but the wizardly updo mod is 🤌

#support fan art creators #bg3 #wwdits #bg3 gale

[a-sassy-bench]

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements

[a-sassy-bench]

reblog if you still think about gale and that little promo pic of him with the lightning heart

I still think about EA Gale and that little promo pic of him with the lightning heart

#bg3 #gale dekarios #bg3 gale