arielstruggles

[arielstruggles]

Pedro Pascal in “Hope”, a short film for Style Magazine Italia, August 2018.

Thirsting Sunday! 🥵🥵

[arielstruggles]

[arielstruggles]

Texas Sun

w.c: 2.3k

Pairing: Bestfriend's dad!Joel Miller X reader

warnings: smut (mdni), age gap, moral questioning, edging, just the tip, mentions of virginity, tit fucking, oral (f receiving)

a.n: Honestly i just wrote this to kind of zone myself our from real life because i am having some sort of problems in my head and haven't proof read it. I just finished writing to be fair. As always i am open to criticism because i know i need lots of improvements in my (non-existent) writing skills. If you read this so far ilysm.

Joel Miller was an attractive man, he was strong, he was confident yet leery. The way he carries himself not only caught your attention but also other women around the neighborhood. You know from Sarah that he does not date that often, but he had this one girlfriend named Tess, she was around his age, they were happy Sarah said back when you were a freshman So he probably does not have those fantasies that you have in mind with him. When the Texas sun burnt your bare shoulders and you were on your way to the Miller’s house your sundress feels like a heavy blanket on your skin these were your thoughts. So, being best friends with Sarah Miller had it perks, one being the possibility of seeing her charming dad. You met Sara in your last year at high school when you moved in Texas with your family. Now that you think about it you realize it has been six years. You were a high schooler back in the day, now you are fresh out of college, unemployed under her parents’ roof. In that hot Texas day, you hoped to find Sarah at home chances were low since she was still a student and she had this internship going on. Yet, you needed to leave the house immediately, you were in the middle of an argument with your mom during the dinner, she was screaming at you about how much of a disgrace you are, tears on your cheeks gets back to you in reality. After wiping your tears, you quicken your pace and head to Miller’s house.

With the sight of their front door, you are questioning your motives. What if she is not home? what if they don’t want me to come inside you think then you decide to knock the door since you are already there. What is the worst thing that can happen right? When Joel Miller opens the door, he greets you kindly “Hey there, lookin’ for Sarah?” you nod sheepishly, already entranced by his presence. You know him for a long time but you are never comfortable around him, mostly because you are scared of developing some sort of sick crush on him. With his black tshirt and grey sweatpants, he does look good. “She’s not home, working on that internship and said she’s gonna be late.” He explains it thoroughly. This is your cue to say good evening and leave but you are limp. You don’t want to go back home. Not yet at least. the thought of going back crushes your soul, it suffocates you. Before you even try to stop tears start flowing again. “Hey hey, sweetheart. Easy now.” he pulls you in his arms. You start sobbing, his warm skin against your face, his woody scent fills your nostrils. He pulls you inside and closes the door, you find yourself sitting on Miller’s couch. “M not gonna force you to speak but you can talk yknow.” He says, it is clear he is as clueless ad you are. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do any of this, really.” Your tone is apologetic. “Don’t be. We all need to get it out of our system.” He smiles warmly. He is genuine, he is kind it only adds to his other good qualities. You start talking about your problems and you cry once again, it is embarrassing how easily you cry in front of a man you think. When your gaze interlock for a brief moment your eyes wander on his lips briefly and you avert your gaze when he catches you. heat blossoms on your cheek as he smirks. He leans on your face ever so slightly, to test the waters. You don’t pull back but you don’t lean on either. It feels wrong on so many levels. He leans on closer and closer until you are inches apart. You can feels his warm breath tickling you. “Go ahead sweetheart.” He purrs. “Mr. Miller-“ you want to say something, you want to reject, he doesn’t force you, not at all. “Yes, darlin” you should say this is wrong, that he is old enough to be your dad but you feel like anticipation building up inside you. Desire consumes your body. You lean and kiss him. He meets your kiss with hunger. He kisses you so roughly that it does not feel like any of the kissed you have had experienced before. It is wet, it is sloppy. He grabs you by the waist and pulls you onto his lap. You broke the kiss panting “This is so wrong.” “Why is that?” “Sarah is my friend-“ “We can stop right now and forget it all happened.” He says, his voice is intoxicating. “Mr. Miller?” you can’t believe you are about to say this “I- uh um, I am uh… I have never done it before?” a smirk forms on his lips. He knows damn well what you are talking about. “You have never done what darling?” “that.” you mumble “I don’t understand.” He says while that smug subtle grin forms on his lips. “You mean sex?” you are not shy about it but his tone makes you want to hide your face behind your palms. Once again you are getting hotter. “Yes.” “It’s okay darling, we have all the time in the world.” what does it mean? Is this something that we are going to keep doing? But it does not feel right? you have so many questions in your head, it’s reflections can be read on your face. “What’s wrong?” he looks at you with furrowed brows. “Nothing, I just-“ you trail off mid-sentence. “S okay baby girl, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” However, you want no no, you are dying for it. You want to feel your bare skins touching each other, hands intertwined, tangled up in bed sheets, sweaty, breathing heavily.

You want all of it, the problem is, how you are supposed to look at Sarah’s face after that? Your thoughts interrupted by his hand that’s caressing your bare arms. His touch is so light but it is enough to awaken goosebumps on your skin. You meet your gaze with his, you are able to see the lust twinkling in his eyes. You have never seen him like this before. You question your morals. Are you seducing an older man? While a part of you feels like once you leave this house, a scarlet A letter will be sealed on your forehead and everyone will see how much of a disgrace you are yet a part of you is dying to commit this crime, to leave the path that your parents carved for you.

With a sudden hunger you climb on his lap and kiss him which he responds with a snort but complies your request. You continue kissing for the second time. It is passionate, it is sloppy. You can’t help but grind on his half-erected cock. It causes you both to moan. “Mr. Miller, I- I want to-“he interrupts you “Are you sure?” “Yes.” “As much as I want to go for it, I can’t baby girl. I don’t want to do anything you might regret.” But I want to.” You whine like a brat and palm his cock through his sweatpants. He growls in your ear, you could swear that it his by far the sexiest sound you have ever heard. “Just the tip.” He says, more to himself as if he is convincing himself to not to go far. “Okay.” He stands up with you in his arms and takes you to his bedroom and places you on top of his bed. It smells like him. A room that you have caught glimpses of it but never been inside. His bed has a rustic, reddish brown headboard, you realize an exercise bike on the corner of his room, dusty due to staying at the same place for a long period of time. You see the meds on the nightstand, his glasses, picture frames with him and Sarah laughing to the camera lens. Guilt is creeping up on you once again. It disappears when you feel his kiss on your neck though. His breath becomes hot against the side of your neck. You could feel his hands roaming around your body, toying with the hem of your dress. One of his hands slides up and down on your thigh while the other hand holds your waist tightly. He kisses the top of your shoulder and looks at you in the eyes. “Can I take this off?” you nod unable to speak. He takes off your dress, leaving you exposed in your bra and panties. His fingers grazing the top part of your bra, occasionally touching your skin. “You are so soft, so pretty.” He kisses your forehead. It gives you a sense of relief. It is like an unspoken agreement between you two. He peppers your skin with kisses, leaving the warm traces of his lips. Once he reaches down to your panties, he tilts his head up to look at you, to see you confirming him to go further. Once you nod, he kisses your heated cunt through the fabric. It is soaked due to your mind running wild with images of you. Traces his tongue between your folds. It feels amazing. Moans and whimpers leaving your lips with the sensation taking over your body. He is eating you out without even taking your underwear. When he rubs the tip of your nose to your clit, you groan. He knows what he is doing, slides your panties to the side and exposing your sleek, glistening pussy. It makes his mouth drool. He kisses, licks, worships it. This must be the princess treatment you think. His thumbs grazing your clit so softly, you want more… but he takes his time. drawing circles around it, going up and down occasionally parting your lips enjoying the view. But suddenly he covers your pussy with your soaked panties again. You furrow your brow with disappointment. You realize he unbuckles his belt. That’s it you think. He’s going to do it. He frees his cock and is his hard as a rock you see. You feel proud. It is a stupid thought, but you did this.

He leans on you again and kisses you passionately. “Such a good girl.” Your breath get heavier with the way he talks. “Or should I say bad?” “Are you my good little slut?”  you nod, you want to be his good little slut. He chuckles. He nestles his cock between your folds on your panties and starts teasing your aching cunt more. The friction causes you to throb uncontrollably. He moves his cock on your sleek panties up and down, slapping it on your clit. “Mr. Miller…” you pant “I want more.” “Just the tip darling.” He coo, he is on top of your body on his knees while you’re lying as a puddle of pleasure. He slides your panties to the side again and aligns his cock with your hole, slowly pushes the tip inside. You moan and your cunt starts throbbing more and more. he pushes a little bit more but stops when he is not even halfway. “Just the tip.” He coos again and you curse. “Tsk tsk tsk, not a good girl behavior.” He leans on you when he is inside of you and unhooks your bra. He takes one of your nipples between his teeth while supping your other tit. You feel on the verge of coming yet you need more. You close your eyes in deep pleasure, your hands go to his hair and grabbing it tightly. His tongue massages your nipple, you moan. “Such a good girl baby girl.” “mmmm daddy.” You moan loudly and come, the realization of what you have just said hits you. Embarrassment takes over your body, you want to run away and hide but since you can’t do it, not when you are a naked mess you decide to act like nothing happened. He suddenly stops. “What did you just say?” “Nothing.” “You sure?” “Yeah.” “Okay.” He says but you can swear you caught a smirk. He continues moving the tip of cock inside you and biting your tit.

Suddenly he takes if off of you. And you realize what he is doing, your eyes widen and you can’t help but lick your lips. He spits between your tits then palms your tits and places his cock between them. At first, he moves slowly but then he picks up his pace and he fucks your tits roughly. “You called me daddy, didn’t you? you’re just a needy little slut eh?” he growls in your ears. The scene playing before your eyes is so pornographic that you want to close your eyes. “Yes daddy.” You reply automatically. It is so embarrassing but you can’t help it. He is dripping with precum, he is close. Without a warning he comes on your tits. You’re covered with warm, white liquid. He kisses your forehead once again “I’m proud of you. You did such a good job.” Your stomach flips upside down. “Wait for me here.” He says and leaves you on the bed. After a short time he comes with a wet cloth and wipes your body gently and lays beside you. Your eyes catches the picture of Sarah and him again, he realizes it “Don’t have to feel bad. It’s our secret.” He winks and spoons you. “I feel so safe.” You murmur. “Good. You should.” He replies.

A couple of hours later the key sound coming from the front door is what makes you anxious. You and Joel look at each other, you are both dumbfounded. “Dad I’m home.” she chirps. Joel is unable to reply back. But when she knocks in his door he clears his throat. “Honey, I’m a little busy right now.” He says and Sarah leaves his door, heads to her room. You have never felt so relieved in your life. You wear your clothes hastily and though Joel opposes the idea, you jump from the window and leave your best friend’s house like you just came in her dad’s bed.

#joel miller #the last of us #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller hbo #joel miller x you #the last of us hbo #joel miller smut #pedro pascal #joel miller fanfiction #best friend's dad #pedrohub #smut #fanfic

[arielstruggles]

S03E04 CHECKMATE

put this p*ssy right in your face

swipe your nose like a credit card

(sorry not sorry, im just feral for season 3 javi in tac vest

BONUS

i want him to MANHANDLE me like so:

[arielstruggles]

[arielstruggles]

i can’t do this anymore

I'm always on tinder, but I never find an old man like him :(

#Tinder joel save me #save me tinder joel

[arielstruggles]

PEDRO PASCAL as JAVIER PEÑA Narcos (2015-2017) | insp

[arielstruggles]

TEARS AND FEARS

The Dawn of Regret ch4.

summary: Joel is an addictive man, it is impossible to move away from him. Even though he is an asshole at times

pairing: Joel Miller x Reader

w.c: 4.1k

Warning: smut (mdni), sex (piv), vulgar language, nipple play, overstimulation, lots of petnames, slight angst, a little trauma, fluff.

a/n: Hello, if there is any mistakes i am sorry beforehand. It has been a while since i last updated the story because i am kind of having a hard time. If anyone reads it, enjoy! And i would love to see your opinions, i am always open to criticism.

chapter1 chapter2 chapter3

After spending some time with him, seeing his affectionate side it feels unfair to go back to your own place… trying to adapt your daily life because he feels like an addiction. Your body craves him, your soul feels empty. It has not been that long since you started having “something” with Joel, yet you feel like he is a part of your life for such a long time. You are aware that you should be prepared to every stupid thing from him. he might act like a total piece of shit the next time you see him or he might treat you like a sweetheart.

You feel like you have been bewitched. It is stupid to be under his spell so easily yet here you are, thinking about him once again. Even though you were with him a couple of hours ago. To be honest, it gives you hope. To be able to feel something other than fear, disgust or anger in this fucked up world. You feel hopeful after all those years. When the darkness fills the sky, you sit in your living room trying to get yourself busy. Walking around your living room, counting your fingers… Finally, you feel tired enough to fall asleep.

When you wake up in the morning you find yourself getting ready to see him. You feel giddy when you walk towards his place, fiddle your fingers. You knock three times knock, knock, knock… when he does not open the door you feel defeated, starting to head to your place. “Where you goin?” you feel your cheeks heating up when you hear his voice and go back to him, finding yourself once again under his gaze. “Hi, good morning.” You grin widely. “Came to make you fall in love with me.” you giggle, you are being way too clingy you know it. This is not how you usually are, he makes you like this. Like as if you should be taken care of him. His lips twist upwards to your stupid boldness. “You reckon’ it’s eight in the morning sweetheart?” though his tone is snarky, you only hear “Sweetheart”. “Are you going to invite me in?” “No” you roll your eyes but a part of you feels resented, your face drops instantly. “Come on sweetie, if you keep pouting how are you gonna make me fall for ya?” he chuckles and motions you to get in. When you brushed passed him, his scent fills your nostrils, you feel electrified because of your arm grazing his. It’s welcoming. You make your way to his living room and sit on his couch. This is not your first time in his place however for the first time you feel bashful. You were quite lively a minute ago, now you want to blend in his couch and disappear. “You are awfully quiet today.” He plops down on your side. “I Just don’t feel like talking.” He does not question, does not force you to talk. When your feelings start to overwhelm you and tears roll down on your cheeks, he does not make any implications, pulls you in his arms and kisses the top of your head. “Are you in love with me yet?” “Yes, I think I am going to propose to you.” you laugh. He is on his good side today.

You spend hours in his place with absolutely doing nothing. It does not bother you at all. The silence of not talking, in fact it feels peaceful. You are not as cheerful as usual, he knows. But he does not want to force you to talk unless you don’t want to. “Joel?” you call his name; he tilts his head to right and raises his brows to show you that he’s listening. “Did you know that if you eat enough apple seeds it can kill you.” he looks at you for a minute dead in the eyes then he chuckles and with a sudden motion he pulls you in his arms. “You are a freak.” He laughs. At that moment you feel like your heart is going to explode. He is so warm, so welcoming. As much as unpredictable he is not a bad man, at least for the ones whom he cares. You gather your courage up and wrap your arms around his torso and nestle your head on his neck. His chest heaves with each breath he takes. He strokes your hair and kisses the top of your head. The moment feels so domestic. You in each other’s arms, it does not feel strange though. It feels like home, “This is what it’s meant to be.” You think.

You kiss his chin without thinking much and peer up at him with pleading eyes to show him what you want. He does not do anything to stop you but he does not encourage you either. With a stupid courage you continue kissing his neck, nibbling on it. Your lips tasting his skin. Even if it turns him on he manages to hide it very well because his breath is steady. Your pussy throbs with expectation but he is annoyingly calm. You slide your hand towards his crotch and stroke his cock through his jeans. He snorts, likes it very much and this time he can’t hide how turned on he is. Yet he refuses to help you out. You sit there on the couch, he embraces you, you stroke his cock and nibble on his neck. You decide to leave him on edge even though you are soaking wet yourself. When you stop touching him he looks at you with a questioning expression. You softly sigh and get off from the couch and ask him innocently, as if you just not got him rock hard “Do you want some water? I am kind of thirsty.” “Could use some water.” he replies and you sway your ass intentionally while heading to the kitchen. He laughs, you are not being sneaky at all but he still wants to grabs your ass while imagining himself pounding into you.

You take your time in the kitchen to calm yourself down a little so you can tease him when you return to the couch without you getting too worked up. When the images of you two fill your head and make your mouth drool your cunt sizzles with anticipation. You want him so badly. But again if the manages to keep his cool, you can do that too. While you are so deep into your thoughts two strong hands wrap your waist thumbs stroking it. “OH MY GOD JOEL!” you exclaim because he scares you. “Got you scared sugar?” he murmurs into your ears while resting his chin on your shoulder, it makes you want to moan. His warm breath tickles your neck. “A little, yeah.” You shortly reply. Though you want to stay strong and pull yourself together, he is pretty distracting. The smell of his minty shampoo coming from his freshly washed hair mixed with coffee is distracting. When his half erected cock barely brushes your pussy, you feel the urge to moan, or even grind on him. “What took you so long, sweetheart?” you blink unable to find a coherent excuse. “Was thinking.” “About what?” “You know, just uh… stuff.” “hmm, stuff…” his tone is not mocking yet he implies that he knows what took you so long. While one of his hands continues to grab your waist his other hand makes its way to your waistband, his thick and long fingers going left to right on it, thumb softly grazing your flesh, his lips on your neck kissing it so gently as if it is a delicate flower. You tilt your ass back to increase the pressure between your ass cheeks with the hope that it may be rub your wet cunt. “Sugar, are you okay?” he whispers, you nod. “Why are you tryna grind on me then?” you want to whine or deny it but it is useless, “Oh shut up, as if you didn’t come here to tease me.” He snorts. “If you ask like a good girl, I may help you.” “Joel, I’m so wet. I need you.” this was all it takes for you to surrender. “There we go sweetheart, was that so hard?” he coos, cocky bastard. He slowly moves himself back and forth against you, you are both clothed but you can swear that he can feel how warm your pussy is. He starts licking your neck, his hot saliva burns your skin. You whimper. Before you know it he slides his sweatpants and boxers, not completely taken off but enough to free his thick cock. You slide your jeans as well and when you are about to slide your panties of he grabs your hand “Not so fast baby girl.” He coos in your ear; warm breath tickles you once again. His request surprises you but you comply. He spits on his free hand and warms his cock just a little so it can move easily, the other hand makes its way to your left tit from your waist. He starts rubbing the tip of his cock to your whole through your panties. The friction feels amazing. With each movement your panties get soaked and he moves it easily. “Such a good girl for me. begging for my love and affection. Aren’t you?” you bite your lip and rest your head into the crook of his neck because his words make you dizzy. He slightly presses the tip of his cock inside your hole through your panties, just so little that you whine when he pulls away you whine. He bites your earlobe and you wince in pain but since he is such a gentleman, he sucks it better.

Your breath starts picking up, so does his. You both get excited but teasing feels so good that you are more than willing to wait. “Yes, Joel please keep going.” You moan. His cock sliding back and forth on your panties feels ecstatic. “Gotta lay you down and ruin your pretty hole sugar.” He whispers and when you nod, he lays you down on the kitchen floor. You catch a glimpse of your panties and though you know it is wet, the sight embarrasses you. He gets on top of you and starts kissing you hungrily. Your togue entwined with each other. You kiss sloppily. He takes off your sweater and unclasps your bra while you are both panting, your lungs hungry to oxygen. He starts with kissing your throat, licking a stripe and leaving your throat wet. He kisses between your breasts and you wait for him the makes his way on your tits. You’re unable to talk, just whing and moaning. When he kisses your nipples you cry out loud, for a second you forget that you are in the middle of a fucking apocalypse because it feels like heaven. He licks them back and forth for a while but then he bites your left nipple and his hand is circling the right one. He licks and sucks your left tit when all you are doing is moan in ecstasy. When he stops toying with your tits, he kisses them gently one more time and continues to his kisses with your ribcage, going down and down till your bikini line, you think he’ll just remove your panties but he does not. He kisses your pussy through the fabric, laps your juices on it. He pulls your panties aside and exposes your bare flesh to himself and starts kissing it directly. The noises are so filthy that even if you are not a religious person, you feel like a sinner. His tongue moves up and down between your folds. “Oh god Joel please please…” you moan without even knowing what you want. He rubs your clit while licking you like the tastiest food, once you start throbbing, he stops and watches your pussy releasing its juice and clenching around nothing. “So pretty, such a pretty pussy baby girl. And it is all mine.” You nod pathetically, he watches the juice drip. After you make a mess, he cleans you with his mouth, the tip of his nose grazing your clit.

Even if you just released, you don’t feel satisfied enough because you’d rather hearing his balls clapping your ass while his cock stretching you. He sees your disappointment and leans to kiss your forehead, “We are not done yet sweetheart, don’t pout now.” He chuckles.

He slaps his cock on your clothed clit back-to-back. When you moan, he rasps “Yeah? You like that?” he continues slapping your clit before he sticks his cock inside your panties and his cock nestles between your folds. He starts moving his cock again. when his cock rubs itself on your soaked underwear he growls. Wet sounds coming from your skins gives you goosebumps. He continues teasing your hole, he loves it. he loves you whing and squirming, craving for his dick inside you yet he keeps edging you. “Joel fuck me please.” You whine on the verge of tears. “You gonna cry for me baby girl?” you never saw him being this rough. Yes he was never gentle but this… this is new and you like it. When you don’t answer he grabs your chin and makes you look at him. “Answer me sugar, are you gonna cry for me?” “yes, yes…” you say and nod. “Okay then, when I see those tears I may fuck you like you deserve it, but until then...” he slaps his cock on your clit again “…this is all you can get.” When you start whining, he continues with his teasing, then you cry… you cry because you want to get fucked. You feel so guilty for craving a man who is older than you for a split second but when you feel his hands sliding your underwear, fucking finally, and he pounds in your hole splits you open the feeling washes itself away. your tummy bulges with his cock and he smirks to the view. He takes your hand and drags it to your tummy bulge and presses it. “Look at you sweetheart, took it like an angel. I’m so proud of you.” his tone is condescending but his gaze is so soft. He slowly starts moving once you adjust to his size you whimper “Faster damn it!” he laughs and complies your wish. His cock is buried inside your pussy, your walls squeezing him. You can feel his cock twitching in your hole, it sends you over the edge that you start throbbing uncontrollably “Joel I’m close… I’m close.” You whine and he starts rubbing circles on your clit to make you come “Me too sweetheart, but ladies first.” He mutters, “Such a gentleman” you roll your eyes but when he fastens his pace you come in an instant. He groans and asks through his groans “Where… do you want… sugar?” “On my tits” he releases his seeds on your tits.

He leans on you and presses his forehead on yours, you both sweaty and panting. His hand cups your cheek “You did so good.” Your tummy fills with butterflies, you feel warm and fuzzy. His praises make you feel like an important woman. His approval gets you dizzy. “Catch your breath, I’m going to get the tub ready.” He leaves the kitchen while you rest on the floor, watching the ceiling. You feel a weight on your chest. It suffocates you. Yes you have feelings for him but at the end of the day he probably uses you for his needs. You feel tears creeping up on your eyes but shake your head suddenly. It does not matter, even this is something you think. After what feels like eternity all by yourself, he returns to the kitchen you realize his hair is wet and he wears different clothes. You thought you’d be taking a bath together so it saddens you. He crouches down then picks you up in his arms, taking you to the bathroom, gently placing you into the warm, clean water. “Thought you’d join me.” “I cleaned up myself.” He pours some shampoo on his hand when you’re inside the tub and he’s crouching beside it, rubs the shampoo on his hand and slowly lathers it on your hair. He is gentle, unlike half an hour ago. Massaging your scalp thoroughly then rinsing it. he repeats it one more time and then grabs a bar soap, starts washing your body. His calloused fingers rubbing every inch of your skin. You’re both silent. Your chest rising when you breathe in, falling when you breathe out. He is careful, takes his job seriously. “Are you in love with me yet?” you ask, laughing at the end so it could seem like you are joking however you are serious. He knows you mean the question but he focuses on your laugh and plays dumb “Yeah, I already plan our wedding.” Rolls his eyes. He does not want to break your heart because it is mostly his fault that you are growing fond of him, but falling in love is not that easy for him. though he deeply cares about you, he can’t name the feelings. “Rinse yourself and imma get you clothes.” He leaves the bathroom and you do as you told. You see two towels he folded up and left for you, can’t stop from grinning ear to ear. You are convinced that he is about to fall for you, he is convinced that he won’t.

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The silence lingers around once again when you both are positioned on the couch lazily. With every touch, with every kiss you feel as if his existence consumes yours. This is no longer you; this is someone who loses their sense of self. It might be because you have already nobody else to love and so much love piled up in your heart, on your body that you want to relieve your aching soul with him. It gives you a reason to go on, he gives you a reason… Maybe you are mourning for your loneliness while leaving your logic out of the equation. Nothing is certain, nothing is infinite.

You are so caught up in your thoughts that you don’t hear when he calls your name. “Sweetheart?” he nudges you to get your attention “Hmm?” “You okay?” “Yeah, yeah sorry.” “Are you sure? You seem a little pensive.” “I’m fine.” You brush it off. In reality you have never been so scared. The uncertainty engraved on your soul suffocates you. Just a couple of hours ago you were happily letting him to soothe your tired body, your anxious mind now you are a prisoner of your thoughts. “Even if he loves me, is this gonna work?” you think. “I don’t mind his age but what if he loves me back and I lose him.” Pointless fears eat you alive and when your stomach growls you realize how hungry you are. This time, you want to cook something for him. “Joel?” “hm,” “I’m hungry” “okay.” “Can I cook something?” “Help yourself sugar.” You head to the kitchen once again, having flashbacks of a couple of hours earlier. You find some canned food that does not look promising at all, going through his pantry you end up with pasta with canned tomato sauce… with the cordyceps breaking out you were unable to eat pasta or bread even for such a long time, you remember the times when you help her to garnish the pasta with basil, you’re laughing without knowing what future holds for you. For after god knows how many years you decide to eat pasta again.

When you finish cooking you grab two plates and fill them with pasta and make your way to Joel, he is sitting and watching a documentary. You join him and hand him his plate. “thank you, sweetheart.” He mutters his eyes focused on the old tv. You start eating and try to watch the documentary but it is so damn boring. You finish your food and look at the screen, Joel seems pretty interested in you on the other hand are try so hard not to yawn. To be fair you try to seem interested on the documentary but it is not only boring but also old as fuck. The people on it probably dead you think. A low huff leaves your lips and Joel throws a glance at you. “Bored?” “No, it is really interesting.” “Are you sure sugar?” “Positive.” You don’t know why but you keep lying to yourself and him. You are desperate to show him that you deserve his love, that you are a match indeed. It’s stupid really yet at the time you cling to a glimmer of hope that Joel may love you. Your eyelids droop and you pinch yourself to stay awake. His eyes twinkle with amusement. You seem so cute that he wants to kiss you all over. “There is nothing wrong with getting bored by the way.” He says his tone dripping with sarcasm. “Oh come on! You literally chose the most boring damn thing.” He chuckles “It’s not my problem that you are not sophisticated enough to grasp the concept.” “Joel, it is about building a house!!!” you protest and grab the remote with a swift movement, he tries to take it back and when you lay back, he towers over you. He starts tickling you and you giggle uncontrollably, your fingers loosen and remote slides between your fingers, hits the floor. You lock in each other’s eyes. It feels as if time stopped. You lick your lips but then he pulls himself back. His gaze hardens all of a sudden. Then he finds some stupid excuse to leave you in the living room. You don’t know what the hell has happened. What have you done to shift his mood.

The rest of the day goes uneasy. He gives you cold shoulders. For a while you are able to ignore the attitude but after some point it feels insufferable. You don’t know that his guilt resurfaced again the moment he saw your innocent face, unaware of his filthy persona. He thinks you are a naïve little girl, but in reality, you are a grown ass woman. His conscience never leaves him alone. Thanks to you the agony lessens but then it resurfaces again. He remembers his daughter and what would he do if Sarah was in this situation. He’d be furious. So he gets furious, not to you but to himself however you take it personal. He knows you are pouting on the couch but stubborn enough to not to return. You wait, wait and wait. The waiting makes you uneasy and you decide to face it. You make up scenarios in your head to prepare yourself from any fucked-up response from him, those only gets you angrier. When you barge into his room he sits at the edge of his bed. “Do you have any idea how stupid this looks?” “What?” “Joel don’t play dumb with me!” he looks at you piercingly. “Should I remind you again that we are nothing.” your throat burns, you know once you start talking, you are going to cry. “YEAH? KEEP TELLING YOURSELF THAT BUT YOU ARE JUST A COWARD.” You yell, not knowing where that voice comes from. “I didn’t promise you anything. You can’t blame me for being such a naïve little girl.” “THEN WHY ARE YOU KEEP GIVING ME THOSE NAMES? WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME YOUR SWEETHEART IF WE ARE NOTHING.” That becomes your last straw. You start screaming him meaningless words and punch his chest. As opposite to his usual attitude he does not say anything back. Because you are right. When your anger subsides, your fear shows itself. You start repeating the same thing repeatedly “I am scared of losing you Joel.” Tears flood down on your cheeks, your chest heaves with each sob. He never saw you like this, you are a mess. He pulls you in his chest and embraces you tightly. Cooing In your ears “It’s okay sweetheart. I got you. I’m not going to leave you.” he chants it like a prayer in your ears over and over again so that you can calm down. He pats your head, brushing your hair with his fingers. With your sobs dying down he kisses your temple softly. He does something he has never done before; he apologizes with a shaky voice his eyes are teary. “I am sorry sweetheart, for everything.”

#joel miller #the last of us #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #pedro pascal #joel miller hbo #joel miller x you #the last of us hbo #joel miller smut #joel miller fluff #joel tlou #pedrohub

[arielstruggles]

can you see how his facial expression changes… good god

and then they just switched off

#pedro pascal #joel miller

[arielstruggles]

*barking noises intensifies*

real.

#I love din djarin

[arielstruggles]

Late Nights, Stolen Kisses

a/n: I'm in the midst of a Javier P brainrot and i can't stop thinking about him. So here is a little drabble. (mostly for myself ) sorry in advance for any possible mistakes. Enjoy!

Pairing: Javi p x reader

warnings: none, pure fluff, no use of y/n.

He works hard, he works too much. He never promised you that he’ll be around all the time and you never once picked up a fight about this. But when he comes back from work late at night and sees you fell asleep on the couch, a book in your hand dangling and food on the table waiting for him he felt like a total dick. He was not a good husband. Not at all. You fixed the table around usual time but he was late, again. Food gone cold, yet still you refused to eat without him. He gives out an exasperated breath. He had no right to put you through to this life but he was too in love with you to let you go, since the day you have met. He crouches down by the couch and grabs the book by your hand, kisses your temple and thinks how pretty you looked. “cariño, wake up.” He murmurs. He was conflicted to wake you up or carry you to bed. A part of him wanted you to wake up because he had a shitty day and needs your comfort but a part of him knows it’s selfish to do so. “Baby, wake up.” He murmurs one more time. He could have woken you up if he raised his voice slightly instead of whispering or he could nudge you but you were like an angel, he couldn’t bear. He lifts you up in his arms and takes you to the bed, puts you carefully under the covers, steals a kiss from you. He sits on the edge of the bed, gets lost in his thoughts, so lost that when you woke up and sneakily crawled towards him and wrapped your arms around his back, he gets startled. “hi there handsome.” You whisper, burrowing your face on his back. “hello hermosa.” He replies, “you were sleeping, didn’t want to wake you up.” “it’s alright, you know you can wake me up. I prepare the table on purpose.” “I know, and it makes me feel like a dick.” You giggle. “Did not mean to.” “I know.” You enjoy each other’s company for a bit. These rare moments with him are your favorites, probably his too. For a split second, you are the only people on this planet. Though he hates to reflect his work issues on you, you know him all too well. “Rough day?” you ask. He simply nods. “Go get changed baby, I’ll wait for you to sleep.” You assure. Though he is reluctant to leave your arms he obeys your request. He quickly changes and slides under the covers right next to you, takes you in his arms. It’s a silent assurance, he promises you that whatever happens, he will be sleeping next to you at the end of the day. “Javi?” “Yeah?” “Can you tell me a bedtime story.” “How old are you again? 3?” he mocks, you laugh. Gives you a quick kiss on the lips when you get comfortable in his arms and rest your head on his chest then he starts to tell you a stupid, made up tale. You know he never refuses your requests. You fall asleep in each other’s arms.

#javier peña x reader #javier peña #narcos #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena x reader #javier pena x you #drabble #javier pena fluff #fluff #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction

[arielstruggles]

[arielstruggles]

Best friends together ♡

[arielstruggles]

[arielstruggles]

The Making of The Last of Us

[arielstruggles]

Confrontations and All

The Dawn of Regret ch.3

Pairing: Joel Miller x Fem Reader

Summary: Sometimes, a bad incident leads something good. You finally decided to confront with Joel and set the record straight.

W.C: 4.1k

Warnings: Smut (mdni), oral (giving and receiving), mentions of death, mentions of traumatic events, slight angst, big fat age gap as usual, praise kink, fluff, cum eating (?) that's it i guess.

A/N: I don't want to rush anything so i understand if you find it a bit boring sorry:( I have a final for this in my mind and if i don't change it, it will be heartbreaking. Like really. But in order to do that i have to deepen the story. I am not sure if will use that ending though. Anyway, if you read this ilysm, enjoy!

you can read chapter 1 and 2 in here.

Normally, you'd feel happy. He was sleeping in your arms, there was not even inches between your bodies. It’s like a fever dream. But considering your unresolved issues, you don’t feel happy at all. Quite the opposite, you feel uneasy. You don’t even know what you are supposed to do now. You had a crush on him, you fucked then you had hell of an argument, you acted like nothing happened even though it broke your heart into million pieces. Because he didn’t even care, or at least you thought so. But he saved you, so maybe he… you don’t know. When he sleeps and you wrap your arms on his torso from behind, when you can smell him… It is impossible to think straight. It should not be this complicated right? If he wants you then he wants you if he doesn’t then he doesn’t. But it is not that simple. Not with Joel Miller. He has so many different layers, whenever you think you reached him there is another layer. His moral codes and traumas cause him to thicken his shell brick by brick. So, it is not that easy for you to reach him. Even now, you can’t guarantee that he’ll be an easy person. You have experienced something deep, it definitely changed the direction of your relationship, or at least you hope so, but even then, it won’t be easy to get along with Joel. Not that he is a bad person, no. but because he is a complex man with hell of a past. Maybe he does not want to deal with someone like you or maybe he does not find you attractive enough you don’t know. Your eyes dart into his relaxed features. His brows are not furrowed, he does not look at you like you are garbage. He does not seem mean or scary. He seems like an angel. The greys in his hair are more visible than ever since you are able study him carefully. His lips are slightly parted. His chest raises with each breath he takes in. You want embrace him tightly, you want to say him that everything is gonna be okay but you don’t even know if it will ever be. He looks so handsome, oh he is really handsome. Your body feels with desire. You imagine yourself on your knees before him, wrapping your lips around his thick cock; veins pulsing inside of your mouth, cuming inside your mouth while he strokes your hair. You lick your lips thirstily. The images in your mind are so clear that you can feel the salty cum inside your mouth. You want him to take care of you, you want him to protect you. After all those lonely years, you crave affection. You know he’d do that perfectly. But you are not sure if he is willing to do that.

You hear him humming so you put your head back into pillow immediately afraid of getting caught. “I know you are not sleeping.” A blush blooms in your cheeks in return he chuckles. As if your body gets the signal you feel relaxed instantly you didn’t even know you were holding your breath. He laughs which means it is not gonna be a bad conversation. “I guess I was not sneaky enough.” “nah, I’m just at alert. I felt when your hands got off of me.” silence lingers around the room while you both lay in bed. Ten minutes ago, you were imagining blowing him but now you want to cuddle and get cozy. But you can’t help the uneasiness grows inside your chest. You are dying to ask him about your “future”. You are not sure the response he’ll give you so you can’t convince yourself to ask but not knowing is the worst. A sigh leaves your lips and Joel’s eyes focus on you. You stare into each other’s eyes. His warm chocolatey eyes are like heaven’s gate in the middle of an apocalypse. You want to erase the stupid smile forming on your lips but you can’t. For a brief moment you forget that you basically mean nothing to him. “You must be starvin’ gonna getcha something to eat.” He says and moves but you grab his wrist tightly “don’t go.” You are needy in a degree that is embarrassing. “’kay” he says and stays in bed with you. When he pulls you on his chest, it surprises you. You are not used to this. “Joel?” he does not say anything but hums to encourage you to talk. “Don’t think I’m putting pressure on you or anything but what’s gonna happen now?” he sighs in return. “Dunno sweetheart.” “Look, I understand if you don’t like me or anything like that but you’re giving mixed signals.” “I am trying to push you away but your stubborn ass finds her way around me.” you want to refuse but it is sort of true. “I am in no position to decide for you but whatever you’re feeling right now, whether it’s shallow or deep don’t get too attached to me. My days are numbered. Even if everything works out, I am thirty years short of life compared to you.” “Ah, Joel! Stop with that bullshit please. Stop using that as an excuse.” For the first time you have known Joel you are able to confront him properly. “that ain’t an excuse that’s the damn truth.” “what’s your real concern? You scared of people judging you because you fuck someone whose half your age? Are you scared Joel? Are you a coward? I don’t expect anything from you if that’s your concern. Just let me love you.” as a response he kisses you passionately. “Know your place missy, I ain’t a coward. I’m just trying to protect you.” you kiss him back and climb on his lap, his large hands grab you by the waist; thumbs drawing circles on your shirt but you can feel his touch in your bones. Your kiss deepens with each passing second, you bite his lower lip. With the moan falling from his lips, you grin. Your tongues dance with each other harmoniously. You press yourself down on his cock. Heat spreads inside your core. “Joel, I need you.” “tsk tsk tsk I don’t think you deserve to get what you need right now.” He says huskily. “What do you mean?” “I’m still mad at you for leaving your goddamn house all by yourself. You were a bad bad girl, got this old man all worried.” You whine in return. “Joel, that’s not fair.” He holds you tightly and picks you up to living room and leaves you on his couch. “Now be a good girl and you may get your reward at the end of the day. Imma get you something to eat.” He leaves living room and heads to kitchen leaving you alone.

Different thoughts race in your head. You are not in a relationship and he made it clear that he is not exactly happy about this whole age gap thing, but he is not reluctant to fuck you either. Maybe he just sees this as just a physical thing. Well, at any rate you are willing to be with him. Even if the feeling is not mutual, he is trying to take care of you. That’s more than enough. Your body overflows with excitement. He is preparing you something to eat, he said at the end of the night he may fuck you. Your one time sex was good but unexpected and resulted with failure. This time he also seems like he wants it. He acts so confusing you think, but at least he wants me.

While joel prepares something to eat he fights with his demons at the same time. Even though, he is willing to give it a shot, the guilt is nestled on his chest does not give him a break. If you were not in a vulnerable position, if you were not in the hands of some sick men earlier he would already send you back to your home. But right now, he can’t. He does not want you to be alone. He is scared. What am I doing? I’m an old bastard whose good days are over, am I taking advantage of her? he thinks. But right now, he can’t. The best he could do was finding a lame ass excuse to not to fuck you right there in the bedroom, he was not aware that it unlocked different emotions in your body. The moment he realized you liked it he decided to try. For your sake or maybe his. He is not in love with you, he is not even sure he feels something romantic towards you. But he wants to protect you. He does not know, every time he does something for you; your feelings get deeper and deeper. He does not know it is not just a physical attraction you feel or it is not appealing to be with him because he is a forbidden fruit. You are amidst of a sea of emotions which is about to swallow you whole, he is on the shore. You both don’t know if he will join you or leave you there to drown. Joel Miller does not deserve to be loved and cared for in his own eyes, that’s why he can’t wrap his head around the fact that someone cares for him without having an expectation.

When he comes back with two plates in his hand and sits right beside you, you feel like an actual couple. The one that two people shares everything from kisses to their foods, you let your delusions fool you. You pat the spot right next to you and he obliges. He hands you your plate “It’s the best I could do.” He smiles apologetically. But in your eyes, this is better than any high-quality restaurant meal. It shows he cares for you. Although you want to tell him that you can’t be sure if it’d cause an awkward silence or not so you decide to unease the mood. “I can tell you’re not a five star cook.” Your tone makes it clear that you are not serious. “Don’t expect too much from an old man.” He chuckles, his dimple deepens. You let your intrusive thoughts win and dip your index finger in his dimple. “What the hell!” he exclaims. “sorry.” You grin widely, he chuckles. “not in my 56 years of life time someone fingered my dimple.” You laugh at his words. “well, every day above the ground we experience something new, am I right?” he nods, a ghost of a smile shadows his lips. The moment feels so domestic. You stole a couple of glances to study his face. You want to stroke his hair, caress his cheeks. A part of you is able to see the man behind the façade for a split second. A man, who needs affection as much as you do. He is not a bad man, you are sure of it. He does what he does because of the pain that hardens his heart. Losing someone is not an easy thing that you can get over so easily.

The watch on his wrist always got your attention, you wondered why he never takes it off. It does not work it is obvious. The glass of it is broken. “Why you always wear that watch?” you ask between your bites but you instantly regret it when you realize the sadness that creeps up on his face. You want to assure him, you want to say sorry I think I have crossed a line you don’t have to answer but you don’t do any of it. You probably messed up, your already weird relationship will go weirder. You feel so small, you want to blend in with the couch that you sit. “It reminds me of my daughter.” You can’t say anything back. You thought he would brush it aside but he answered. “the bullet that crack the watch also took her from me. I could not save her. I never wanted to live in a world that she wasn’t in it. I was a bad dad and I am ashamed of it, I could not save my baby girl. It took less then ten minutes for her to die. I watched it every second of it. I don’t deserve to live peacefully after leaving her to death. The watch makes sure that I remember every second. Time stopped when I lost her, no need to use a watch that works because I’m still in that moment, never moved on.” His honest explanation hurts you more than you could ever imagine. You feel disgusting for trying to hurt him with bring her daughter into your stupid fight weeks ago. You want to apologize; you want to hug him and tell him that everything is gonna be alright but you know that’s some bullshit. Your gaze intertwines and he catches the apology in your eyes. “You don’t have to say anything, silence is the best answer sometimes. Also, I hate hearing she would want you to be happy bullshit.” You nod in return because honestly even if he expected you to say something, you could not. You both finish the rest of your plates in silence. He grabs your plates and takes them to the sink in the kitchen you can hear the water running. You sneak out to kitchen and wrap your arms around him behind, pressing your face to his back. “Am I being a good girl?” you mutter. A smile forms on his lips “It’s early to decide.” Your body moves with him when he washes the plates and dries them since you hold him tightly. You can’t help but feel warm and fuzzy, it’s almost intoxicating. The way your bodies pressed into each other, your arms around him… “you are a one needy thing.” He mutters. You don’t fight back. You walk back to the couch and sit down again. “Joel?” “hm?” “do you have any books?” “I got a couple of but you would not be interested.” “you don’t know about that.” he sends you an amused look and walks towards his room then returns with two books in his hands. They are about construction, so yeah you would not be interested but still you don’t want to admit it. “Oh, I love construction!!!” You cheer with a fake enthusiasm which sounds faker than you expect. “Really now?” he raises his brows and sits right next to you. “Of course!” you try to stop yourself from laughing but when he laughs you fail to do so. You grab the book from his hands and start reading out loud. “You know, it is pretty interesting.” “Stop with the bullshit.” He chuckles. You continue reading and he listens every word intently as if you are revealing the secret of immortality.

The book is pretty boring to say the least, it does not interest you at all. When he lays his head on your lap though, your words choke on your throat and it feels worth every sentence you have read. Different emotions flood through your body. You can hear your heart beats in your chest. You quickly get yourself together and continue reading and he listens, swallows every word pouring from your lips. After gathering your courage one of your hands find her way in his hair, stroking softly. For a moment, you both let yourselves to forget the talk you eventually have to do. You didn’t resolve anything. You didn’t apologize or come to terms with your actions. You simply ignored everything because of your hostage situation. You feel his soft, greying hair; he feels your fingers rubbing his head. Your voice feels velvety to him. He wants to resist. This feels like a violation of a territory that should be handled carefully. But he feels so peaceful that he does not care. You put the book aside and watch his face. You gather all your courage and clear throat before talking. “You broke my heart Joel and I know I also crossed a line. But your words were harsher than mine. Yet I can’t stop from feeling something towards you. All it takes for a smile to grace my lips is just a couple of nice words from you. Your presence alone is enough to make me want to keep going. I don’t expect you to love me, but don’t push me away. Please.” He is baffled by your words. He wants to say no, he wants to say you’re young and he is an old rascal but he can’t because your words stroke his ego. He simply nods. Silence fills the room one more time before he decides to speak. “I can’t promise you anything, but I’m in no position to decide for you. You are free to do whatever you like. But I can’t love you. Don’t expect some emotional response from me.” though his words shatter your heart at least he lets you in, this is an invitation that you can’t decline. “I won’t.” your hand makes its way to his face and caress his cheeks. In your eyes, he is just a broken man who deserves to be loved beneath his grumpy surface.

After reading almost an hour you get bored. “Am I being a good girl?” you ask again, your body wants him. You want him. he then sits up and faces you instead of laying on your lap. “What do you think?” “I think I was being a good girl.” “hmm?” he looks at you, his eyes twinkle with amusement. You know he desires you as much as you do, on a physical level at least. Your hands slide on his crouch, slowly stroking him through his jeans. You burrow your face on his neck. “Joel, let me take care of you.” you whisper. You lick his neck softly while your fingers continue stroking him. With a sudden motion he pulls you on his lap and kisses you deeply. You suck his tongue and he responds you with a low whimper. You are throbbing on his lap wetness spreading on your underwear. When he bites your lower lip you giggle. He wraps his arms around you and picks you up to his bed. You sit at the edge of the bed on your knees and he stands before you. Even if he does not say anything out loud you know what he wants, to be fair you are dying to give him a head. Not without teasing him though. You nuzzle against his hard cock through his jeans, move your face up and down, he growls grabbing your hair from the back of your head and presses you more. This time he is at your mercy. You unbuckle his belt and pull down his jeans but don’t touch his underwear. Thin material allows you to realize that he is as excited as you if not more. When you kiss the tip of his cock he gasps. Though you want to swallow him whole seeing him whimpering and whining is much more enjoyable. When you finally pull down his underwear his thick cock waters your mouth. It’s all ready and sensitive waiting for you to take care of. You take the tip in your mouth while tilting your head up to see Joel’s features. He bites her lips, eyes glistening with expectation. Your deliberately slow movements drive him crazy. The tip in your mouth, you just watch him. Eyes shut tightly, brows furrowed, biting his lips. When he moves your head with his hand you slightly bite his tip. Unexpected pain mixed with pleasure leads him to moan loudly. It feels like the greatest song ever created. Once you take if off of your mouth he whines. You spit on your palm. One of your hands moves up and down on his length while you leave sloppy kisses on the tip. He can barely stand up, he feels weak on the knees. When you finally take half of his cock in your mouth your hot breath overwhelms him. Your lips wrap his cock, you can feel him pulsing inside your mouth, just like you imagined. He guides your head up and down. When you take it all your eyes tear up you can feel it at the back of your throat. It’s too much, you want to gag but then you get use to the feeling. “Such a pretty girl, taking me with her mouth so well.” He coos. You make a muffled noise as a response to his praise. While he guides you through his cock, your hand grabs his balls. You squeeze slightly. You feel his hips stutter. When he fills your mouth with his salty cum you swallow it whole. He watches you in awe. His thumb wipes out your chin with his thumb and he pushes his thumb inside your mouth you suck his thumb. Though he feels slightly embarrassed for coming so easily he feels so satisfied.

You throw yourself to bed on your back, panting. He climbs on top of you. He realizes your questioning gaze “It’s my turn to take care of you.” “you’ve been such a good girl, took me so well sweetheart.” He strokes your cheek. He presses his knee to your clit, the fraction of clothes sends shivers on your back. You nod eagerly while dripping on your underwear. He moves his knee up and down while watching your every movement like you did to him earlier. He leans on you and kisses your neck sloppily. While rubbing his knee on your cunt. He takes off your shirt and bra, exposes your hardened nipples. Leaning on your breasts he burrows his face between them. His breath tickles you. The moment he licks a stripe on your tit you whimper. “needy.” He chuckles. You are not sure but you feel like his voice gets huskier when he fucks. He peppers your whole torso with kisses and makes his way down to your pussy. He kisses you through your jeans like you did to him while his knee still pressed to your clit. Then he takes of your jeans and panties. When his knee loses the contact with your pussy you whine but the moment you are fully naked, he presses his knee back again. Now you can feel his jeans fully. He leans on to kiss you while grabbing your tit and toying with it softly with his thumb and index finger. You can feel him everywhere. You moan into his mouth. His hands roam around your body, touches everywhere while his lips on yours. You break the kiss “Joel… please.” He chuckles. You can see his hardening cock. He continues moving his knee up and down on your pussy pressing is ever so slightly. You feel you’re close and he didn’t even finger you. “Joel, I’m close.” With your warning he stops moving his knee. You whine in return but when you feel his mouth sucking your clit you don’t even care. He warm mouth is all over your cunt. He pushes his tongue inside you and plays with your clit. When you come inside his mouth, he also swallows you whole. After you finished, he lays right next to you and takes you in his arms resting your head on his chest. You both pant heavily. “we’re not done yet.” he kisses your forehead you both chuckle.

 “We gotta clean up.” “I thought we were not done yet.” “I’m an old man give me a break.” You both laugh. He rolls up from the bed and goes to bathroom, preparing the bathtub for both of you, making sure the water is not too hot or too cold. Then he picks you up and carries you to the bathtub. He gets in the tub and pulls you in his lap. You press your back on his chest, feeling his chest heaves with each breath. He takes the shampoo from the side and washes your hair. His touch is so soft compared to ten minutes ago. His fingers moving on your scalp so tenderly. It is ridiculous. For a man who claims there is nothing emotional on his side his actions are so affectionate. He may not be loving you, but you can live with this. Feeling his warmth right next to you is enough. For now. “Joel?” “hm?” “what are we now?” “I was wondering when you will ask this. I don’t know sweetheart. And as I said earlier, I can’t promise you anything.” “I’ll make you fall for me.” “will ya now?” he chuckles. “yes.” “I wouldn’t be so sure.” You are certain though. He is going to fall for you. Maybe not now but eventually. He knows it too.

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tags: @eliza-8 @orcasoul @joeldjarin

#joel miller #pedro pascal #the last of us #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #tlou hbo #joel miller hbo #joel miller x you #the last of us hbo #joel miller fluff #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #smut

[arielstruggles]

Losing my mind

For all the Tim Rockford girlies - y’all are just wonderful. Stay creative ♡

PS: if anyone caught the references, I’m kissing the tips of  your fingers.