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atinybitofau · 4 months

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i don’t know if i’ll come back to atinybitofau soon. i have some rough edits i need to do on some old stuff before i come back.. on a good note! I have drafts for a near future— maybe. In the mean time, please enjoy TBZ content.

if my moots are still alive and not dry, I love ya’ll.

SUNWOO ↳ “𝕺𝖓𝖈𝖊 𝖚𝖕𝖔𝖓 𝖆 𝖙𝖎𝖒𝖊”

a TBZ frat boyz series.

kim sunwoo x f!reader :: ex lovers/soulmate tropes

warnings: some explicit content 👀, hardly smutty. lots of feels though. (rough edit)

𝔬𝔫𝔠𝔢 𝔲𝔭𝔬𝔫 𝔞 𝔱𝔦𝔪𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢 𝔩𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔡 𝔞 𝔥𝔬𝔱 𝔰𝔬𝔠𝔠𝔢𝔯 𝔱𝔢𝔞𝔪 𝔭𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔦𝔤𝔶 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔞 𝔨𝔫𝔬𝔴-𝔦𝔱-𝔞𝔩𝔩 𝔟𝔬𝔬𝔨 𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔪 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔪𝔢𝔢𝔱 𝔬𝔫𝔠𝔢 𝔞𝔤𝔞𝔦𝔫 𝔴𝔥𝔢𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔪𝔬𝔬𝔫’𝔰 𝔣𝔲𝔩𝔩 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔰𝔱𝔞𝔯𝔰 𝔞𝔩𝔦𝔤𝔫…

“Bite me.”

you were a realist.

far from delusional,

even if the stars aligned on a full moon night.

nothing could convince you to believe that a frat party would be a hell of a good time.

“I have too much shit.” you annunciate, yeeting a pencil in your best friend’s general direction. “Ask Mina. I’m sure she’d find sweaty people and an uncanny amount of booze fun.”

your model of a roommate sulks.

bummed you weren’t like the rest of the girls around here.

like who in their right mind would decline an invite to the biggest frat house in SK?

“Leave it to you to pass on a good time. Boo, tomatoes.”

you send her a merciless smile. “I feel less of a detriment to society this way. Have you seen me in anything other than sweats and a hoodie? It takes effort to look as good as you. Effort I cannot spare for myself.”

“Talk about dramatic.”

dramatics aside,

there was nothing that could possibly be done to drag you out of this dorm room and into the pits of hell called TBZ.

that godforsaken frathood might drive you off a cliff.

you’ll give them the benefit of the doubt.

they were far from hideous— a sight for sore eyes really.

intelligent, sociable, and athletic.

all 11 of them.

even if 2 happened to both your exes.

once upon a time..

“Well, i’m leaving.” the gorgeous red head flips her hair, model figure hugged in the little black dress she sported. “If i’m not back by morning, send a search party. I love you! Don’t study too hard my little book worm.”

yes.

there were some perks to being roommates and best friend’s with your polar opposite.

a stable social life.

free clothes.

and invites to the biggest parties?

too bad you hardly found any of those to be useful to you.

“Hello?”

“Y/n?” her voice sounds irritated, slightly slurred and strained against the echoing music of the party. “Y/n, can you come get me? Fuck— these people are losers. I’m drunk.”

you grimace.

she’s upset.

it’s only midnight and of all people—

Taeri was upset.

“Did something happen?” you mumble sleepily, sitting up to turn on a light. “Are you okay? DId someone hurt you?”

too drunk to process the question, she groans. “Will you just please come and get me? I feel like I’m gonna explode.”

“O-okay, just give me a couple—“

the call flat lines.

great.

the day has finally come that the stars aligned on a full moon night.

albeit, you still didn’t think the frat party was gonna be a good time,

but i guess you’ll bite.

it didn’t take long to wash up a little, whipping out one of Taeri’s hand me down’s.

10 minutes longer and you had your liner drawn and a simple red tint to your velvet lips.

you absolutely dreaded having to face the day you’d ever come to this—

a strapless top, tight jeans and mid height high heels.

but you had some class.

you weren’t gonna be a detriment to society by showing up in half ass pj’s.

“Hey.”

the hottie by the door makes a double take.

“H-hello.”

your forehead creases, eyes looking into the still much alive party. “Aren’t you gonna ask for my name, pretty boy?”

pretty boy doesn’t respond.

honestly, too stunned to answer.

because god damn.

god damn—

“Damnit.” Eric blinks furiously, wiping at his shirt upon spilling some of his drink. “Sorry, name?”

“Y/n.”

“Y/n, you’re on the list— Y/n?”

at this point, he’s completely disregarded his drink.

the rest spilling all over his thousand dollar shoes.

“Y/n.” you affirm with a slight chuckle. “Taeri called. Is she alright?”

no, of course she’s not.

the sole reason for her coming, being her ex boyfriend who happens to live here—

who undoubtedly was the cause of the phone call in the first place

“Well all hell hasn’t broke loose yet.” Eric manages to make it through a sentence. “You don’t normally come to these things, don’t you? Taeri said you’re not much of a party goer.”

“Great observation, pretty boy. I was summoned. If Taeri wasn’t in trouble, why’d she call me then?”

he aimlessly shrugs. “Hyunjae hasn’t touched you hot model bestie all night. I mean Sunwoo’s back in town so maybe—“

oh god.

OH MY GOD.

fucking hell on earth.

“Hey, didn’t you and Sunwoo—“

“No I don’t know a Sunwoo.” you elicit a pressed panicked grin. “And Sunwoo doesn’t know me. Are we understanding each other? Do I make myself clear, pretty boy.”

the pretty boy grins back. “Fucking crystal.”

you pray to the stars in the sky to disarrange.

you pray for anything but the storm that brews ahead.

you pray for the sake of your roommate,

that this was nothing but a coincidence.

“— that Sunwoo’s back in town, can you believe it?”

you refrain from putting that stranger into a chokehold.

wanting nothing but to be home in your covers.

you’re no cinderella but,

it’s past your damn bedtime.

“Where the fuck is she?” You mumble to yourself incoherently, searching the heavily intoxicated crowd for your best friend.

leave it to her to make you the damn search party.

these heels were killing you.

but those heels on you weren’t just killing you,

it was killing everyone else too.

“You won’t believe who just walked in.” Eric came back to his group of troublemakers, kissing his lips through a devious smirk. “God damn, you won’t believe me when I tell you. Who just walked through our fucking doors.”

Sunwoo’s a little less interested.

tired is a simple word to describe his current attitude.

he just got back into town, man.

it’s been a stressful week for him.

the last thing he wants to deal with was Eric’s crazed nonsense.

Hyunjae’s shoulder’s perk from on top of the counter. “If you’re talking about my god forsaken ex again, we’ve already crossed paths. Like fourth party in a row.”

“Not your ex.”

Eric’s feverish.

he’s only heard about the legend of y/n.

the closed-off maths geek Sunwoo had a boner for freshman year.

the hardly qualified best friend of the hottest model on campus.

“But she’s so fucking hot though.” Eric dreamily drools, nodding from the corner in which they gather. “She’s drop dead gorgeous, Sunwoo. How could a star soccer player like you, drop a once in a lifetime shot like that?”

“What the fuck are you on about, you— you’re kidding.”

the star soccer player can’t remember the last time he saw you.

well, to be fair, the last time he saw you,

you were in an oversized hoodie, worn-in sneakers, and sweats doubled your size.

now people are expecting him to believe his ex girlfriend stalked the halls of his house—

in stunning Louboutins nonetheless.

leather tight top hiked too far up the stomach, cleavage half out and bed hair making you look like a 5-star Michelin.

those heels.

the heels are killing him on you, he doesn’t know what to do.

“You’re fucking kidding.” Juyeon jumps from his seat, the rest of the males following suit like a pack of hungry wolves. “That’s her?”

Sangyeon whistles at all that. “I’ll be damned.”

Sunwoo can’t say a thing.

nope.

he’s not allowed to.

leave it to you to sweep the entire party of their feet right after he did.

“Taeri!” you call, unbeknownst to the lingering eyes around you. “Taeri, where are you!”

your heels click at the tiles,

excusing yourself in the crowd like the prim you are.

noting to run as soon as you find,

“Kim Sunwoo.”

your breath’s taken away.

haphazard and eyes blown out of their sockets.

you can’t run if he’s the one that finds you.

“Sunwoo, I—“

he doesn’t let you manage even a word.

clearly won’t let you say a thing.

not that you weren’t allowed to.

after all,

he’s the one that got away.

“Not you.” you tear his hands from tugging on your wrists. “Of anyone in this damn frat house, not you, Kim Sunwoo. I want absolutely nothing to do with you.”

leave it to Sunwoo to look at you like the mad man he is.

the hot shot playboy of IST,

this was your sumptuous ex boyfriend.

your only ex boyfriend.

“— the last thing I want to see. Get away from me.”

his eyes roll and he pins you to the wall of his bedroom,

making sure to lock the door behind you.

“The last thing I want to see is my beloved ex girlfriend showing up half naked at one of my frat parties. But life’s unfair isn’t it?”

he elicits a pitiful snort and you dare yourself to retort back. “The thought never bothered you before when you begged me to be your damn side piece, once upon a time.”

“Once upon a time, you were mine. Let me make myself very clear, you were my girl. And right now, I don’t get that luxury— i’m not allowed to call you that.”

“If you’re looking for permission, you’re far from it. I’m not here for you, i’m here for Taeri.”

Sunwoo’s never liked that girl.

always trying to get you to wear the skankiest clothes.

present you like a centerpiece.

taking you whenever she wanted.

(she had her work cut for her)

when all he wanted was you all to himself.

“Trying to prove yourself by being hotter than her?”

you pry his body off of you,

heated.

absolutely heated you could explode.

“Trying to prove myself by not being a damn joke. Isn’t that what I was to you, once upon a time Kim Sunwoo? The reason you dropped me because I could never prove myself to be the girlfriend in Kim Sunwoo’s hot fucking life.”

his chest rises and falls as fast as his blood boils.

he always loved firing you up.

you were so hot, he couldn’t tell you why.

but he always wanted to strip you out of your oversized clothes and get you completely naked anyway.

the thrill of seeing you naked being a blessing in disguise.

right now,

you were already half way there.

“I loved you.”

“Loved me?” you laugh incredulously. “The sex was good but other than that, what can you say you loved about me? Other than lying to my face, nearly ripping out my hair, telling me your cock only belonged to me? But digging it inside other women like that didn’t matter at all.”

he’s taken by surprise.

that dirty mouth of yours.

he’s been needing a stress relief.

and suddenly, he’s not that stressed about any of his circumstances.

especially the ones he faces right now.

in fact, he’s more laxed than he’s ever been in his entire life.

“Still thinking about my cock, are you?”

“Yours and 5 others, baby. It stopped being all about—“

his lips crash against yours and the wall is suddenly your best friend.

so much for Taeri—

god, Kim Sunwoo was just so irresistible.

“You.” he growls into your lips while ripping off his shirt. “It’s always been all about you, hasn’t it?”

an arduous moan escapes your tethered lips,

melting in the hands of your inconceivable ex boyfriend.

“Im gonna make those 5 others look like training wheels, baby. I’m going to make sure you know who you belong to.”

it’s been 2 years.

you weren’t gonna wallow over your breakup with Sunwoo forever.

yes, you’ve slept with other people but damn.

other people will never be Kim Sunwoo.

“I won’t even have to beg for you to be my side piece when i’m finished with you.”

Taeri and Hyunjae were fine.

Taeri was upset but hey,

Hyunjae beat you to it anyway.

while Sunwoo’s beating into you,

Taeri stops to look at her ex, “Have you seen y/n? She said she was gonna come get me.”

Taeri’s never really liked Sunwoo for you either.

he was always possessive.

always center of fucking attention.

too big and mighty for her little know it all.

but god damn.

if there was anyone who made you happier than she’s ever seen you,

it was that poor unfortunate soul.

“She’s gonna eat him alive.” Taeri chuckles with her hand on her ex’s lap. “Poor thing, y/n’s balled up her anger for him for years. You think he’s gonna be okay?”

that was the thrill of you, you know.

always one step ahead of everyone else,

Sunwoo had to put a leash on you.

he was so tired of chasing,

“You’ve let go, Sunwoo.” you’re hyperventilating over his broad chest. “Where’s all that control you had now?”

you were gonna be the death of him.

he had to juggle loving you, paying the frat, his soccer career—

“I’m sorry.”

3 rounds later and Sunwoo’s spent.

ravishing in your beauty,

the yearning of something he didn’t think he needed in a long time.

you made him the happiest man alive once upon a time.

“I don’t deserve you.”

3 rounds later and you were convinced.

ravishing in his warmth and comfort—

you haven’t felt this content in a long time.

“You deserved all of me.”

you loved him.

god you loved him and you don’t know how to stop.

2 years later and he’s still the man you love.

“I loved your wide smile. I craved your touch. I wanted your attention every damn day and you deserved every minute of having me. I loved everything about you, Kim Sunwoo. But you made that decision to let me go a long time ago.”

he kisses the places your tears stain,

fingers shakily threading through your now long hair.

“I was tired of convincing myself all of that was true. Tell me, baby. What else did you love about me?”

you catch your breath, nose brushed against his.

“Your eyes. Your nose. Your dick.”

his throaty laugh fills your ears like music on christmas morning. “What else, baby?”

you lean in, humming against his cheek.

eyes shut in absolute bliss.

remembering the subtle scent of bergamot and sage that stained his skin.

“Your lips? The way they move when you kiss me. How they feel when you tell me you love me.”

his arms clasp around your hips.

high on your euphoria with you pressed against him like this.

the stars were in his favor tonight.

perfectly aligned in the sky when he finally tells you,

“I love you.”

you’re convinced he’s joking.

you have to convince yourself he was making you a joke.

but Sunwoo holds you like he’s gonna lose you.

afraid you were gonna let go.

“I’ll never deserve you but i’ll love you for the rest of my life if I have to in order to convince myself I do.”

“What do you love about me, Kim Sunwoo?”

the full moon is in your favor.

illuminating the room just enough to meet his colorful eyes.

just enough color to remember how he looked at you once upon a time.

“That you’ll be the only girl that I get to love in my entire life. I don’t want to be with anyone else but you, baby. Not even if the stars start crossing in the sky.”

you a side piece?

hardly.

no, Kim Sunwoo never left your side.

he was like an overbearing parasite,

only having to move elsewhere when he wanted to be on top.

or when he kneels in front of you to ask you to be his wife.

and to think he would’ve had to beg once upon a time.

@kyusunyu / @kpopinesss / @atinybitofau

#she’s back #gertie 2023 #i miss you guys

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atinybitofau · 4 years

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You're literally the best Atiny writer on tumblr 🍷🐸

DONT.

#I’m ugly crying #I don’t take compliments that well as much criticism #ughh but you made my week #maybe month #my year maybe idk #questions and comments

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atinybitofau · 4 years

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S E O N G H W A ⥈ mafia au series

RECAP: training with the boys begins and frustrations between you all get heated. Seonghwa offers you a kind gesture of motivation to get you to learn how to fight.

word count: 1600+ , tags: angst fluff

characters: ateez (ensemble), reader

⤩ CHAPTER 3 ⤩

character list . one shot

“So what DO you know how to do?”

Yunho has never recalled seeing such a pathetic attempt at shooting in his entire life. Up until today when he saw the way your hand trembles around a gun. San, on the other hand, was elated to watch you suck at every single thing you tried to do. You were downright frustrated knowing: learning how to shoot, physically defend yourself, and fighting back wasn’t something you sought to learn.

He kept his hopes high though, Yunho, wanting to see you prosper at the side of his ruthless boss. And even if San thinks otherwise of the circumstances, Yunho assumed your place beside Seonghwa would do the heartless southside king justice. Being with him for so long, Yunho knew of Seonghwa’s shortcomings. Love was undoubtedly one of the assets Seonghwa never had. Seeing as he’s at least trying, Yunho wanted to help out the fact.

He had become frustrated too whilst teaching you and decided maybe you needed a breather.

You were quiet despite San’s failed efforts to get into your head with his rambunctious insults. You only stared at the ground while the other two pondered over new ideas. You weren’t trying at all. You’d like to think it’s because you refuse to take part in justifying yourself for a self proclaimed husband. Honestly, you just had little motivation to try let alone exert any unnecessary efforts.

“Your husband’s arrived early.” A meddling voice fills your empty mind. “He‘s on his way to pick your ass up so look alive.”

Your lips curt a faint affirmation before taking your things and beelining for the building’s locker room. There was soft excitement that frenzied deep down in your stomach as you changed. Not that being around a bunch of buffoons bothered you much but you’d much more prefer the company of a senile swine like your husband than them any day. As pathetic as they sounds to you...

San’s picking at his nails cooly on the outside patio while Yunho leans against a pillar. You’re sat cozy in a chair with your bag over your lap as you all await the said mob boss’ arrival.

“Fashionably fucking late, as always.” San seethes through gritted teeth. “Does that asshole not know I have better things to do than babysit his sorry excuse for a wife?”

San was getting sick and tired of it already. Of course, unbeknownst to you, San absolutely adored his precious leader. It doesn’t excuse the fact that your obnoxiously attractive self gets to settle down with his own first love. To add to it, Seonghwa was effortlessly throwing you around like a treasure that must be watched at all times. Somehow, San realizes the time Seonghwa claimed he had when bargaining his new gift did not exist. So here San was doing Seonghwa’s bidding yet again.

Yunho notices the clench in San’s tight look and glares into his own. “Sannie. Let’s not get careless.”

“Bastard better think twice if he thinks I’m gonna still be sleeping in his house after this.”

San glances at you with no momentary comfort before sticking a cigarette into his lips. You note the face of shock that masks on Yunho’s face but says nothing at all.

“He’s here.” Yunho coughs out while glaring at the cancer stuck between San’s lips. “Kill that stupid thing.”

“With pleasure.” San growls back eyes groveling at you.

“San.”

You stand up upon seeing Seonghwa’s knowing glare from the cracked window of his sleek black SUV. The tables turned on the fellows around you when your heels flick on an opposite direction. Being unwanted never bothered you. Being unwanted forced into a situation has not once bothered you. Being victim to it and having the choice to walk out? Now that’s an additional option you’ve never always have and will always willingly take. You don’t do unnecessary efforts. And you know when you aren’t wanted.

“Y/n!”

You ignore them with heavy feet trudging in no resolute destination in mind. Your fingers play with the earphones in your bag before placing them in your deafening ears. You’re joined by a slow moving car at your side while you walk in no particular direction away from your fiancé.

“Honey, get in.”

You ignore him with a long press of your volume up button.

“Stop being stubborn, y/n.” His voice gets harder. “If I have to get out of this car so help me god I’ll—“

You snatch an earphone out of your ear. “You’ll have San deal with me?”

He abruptly brakes when you do. You let out a grunt of vexation before placing an earbud back in your ear.

Seonghwa decides to park his car right then and there to throw you over his shoulder like a sack of rice. Your face flushes in the hottest color of pink as you try to break free.

“S-SEONGHWA WHAT THE HELL?”

“This’ll be what stubborn gets you from now on.”

You resort to sulking in the front seat as your husband possesively holds his hand on the surface of your thigh. You don’t bother even looking back at where the both of you left San and Yunho, irritated eyes strewn on the outside of the moving vehicle.

“I’m assuming your training didn’t go too well.” He comments while driving faster this time.

You don’t reply making Seonghwa’s fingers twitch on your lap. So much for convincing yourself you aren’t wanted.

“Y/n, I’m no psychic. You need to tell me if something bothers you.”

You scoff. “And what, Seonghwa? You’re gonna fix it?”

“I most definitely will try if that’s what you entail me to do.”

You don’t move from your position as your husband drives you to what you know is back home. The eerie silence that fills the both of you in the car makes your gut clench. His fingers on your thigh aren’t helping the entire car ride either.

Seonghwa’s presence to you reminded you of air. He wasn’t a nuisance to have around and for an appraising relationship to move forth with lesser issues, that’s a good thing. Actually, to add to the fact, Seonghwa was much more meaningful company than anyone else. He never crossed any unnecessary lines and if he did, he did so with grace. It was hardly something you can’t sleep on.

He escorts you, with a distance between you two, towards your shared room and it feels domestic. There’s little need for words. Needn’t questions either. Seonghwa was far from an open book, but he’s not the type of novel that pegged your fancy anyway.

Seonghwa’s back was to you as he stripped out of his dark suit, shoulders bared with torturous temptation. Your mind was clouded no thoughts head empty when he brings you out of your trance with a slight quirk of his chin around his shoulder.

“I can at least draw to a conclusion,” He just keeps pushing the subject of matter you refuse to shed light on. “that the basics of living with a man like me weren’t taught to you properly then.”

Your face becomes shaded with amusement. “Living with a man like you requires basic training?”

“You always think so little of me, my precious wife.”

You feel like you’re in some fanatical love story— how fast he is to getting to your place, finger upon the tip of your chin. He lifts your gaze up onto his eyes with certainty and slight amusement too.

“I may not be of some threat to you but some people will think of you to them. I’m an expensive man and I don’t spend my money and the likes of it on just anybody.”

A twitched smile screws your expression. “And that’s supposed to impress me?”

“Scare you a better word for it.” He slips on a low cut long sleeve and a pair of casual pants before dropping you onto his lap. “I need to know. That at all times I’m never with you.. you’re prepared to take down the worst.”

Your breath hitches at the back of your throat as his fingers grace the exposed skin on your neck. His lips take upon the deed of pressing a sweet kiss, the feel of pain besting you. You don’t realize in the blur of the pleasure how a throbbing pain lingers where his lips lift.

“I know I promised not to take things too far but if you have no reason to fight, I’ll have to offer you one.”

It’s not a mark of lust nor was it a bite of love. It was a mark for people to see. It was a caligraphy of his own sort, making itvlegible for anyone to read. His lips relieves the vibrating pain and you’re curious. You turn to face him and his breath meets yours. You get caught up in something that isn’t there but you can taste. It was like something you need. A lot like air.

“It was meant for your skin.” He reassures you taking an inch of space back. “It’s not inclined for you to believe it’s also for your lips sake.”

You chuckle softly no blush apparent to his notion. “What a romanticist.”

He boredly hums. “Seems so.”

You wear a shirt that reveals the mark as if you’re proud to bear it. No, it’s not pride you feel entitled to, it’s the meaning. It gives you reason to fight.

Seonghwa stands beside you while you throw punches; in front of you when you kick and swing so he can teach you how it’s done.

It’s then you realize why he’s Southside’s king and why he deserves his title.

“Yunho informed me that your lack of skill was overbearing this afternoon.” Seonghwa speaks highly, eyes dawned with amusement and amazement. “That or I’m just one hell of a good teacher.”

You lean over to help him up. “I didn’t have a reason to defend myself. I think I do now.”

“While fighting me?”

“Something like that..”

@atinybitofau

a/n: ROUGH EDIT

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atinybitofau · 4 years

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I’m soooo lazy. I don’t want to make a masterlist. Someone do it for meeeee 😭😭😭😭

#writer problems #don’t be me #I’m tired and lazy

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atinybitofau · 4 years

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you’re back!!! how have you been and what are your thoughts on atz and tbz comebacks??🥺❤️

wondering how I’m gonna survive if I keep losing my wallet to those hoes. 😪

#realtalk #questions and comments

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atinybitofau · 4 years

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S E O N G H W A ⥈ mafia au series

RECAP: you finally have to close the deal with the devil and you meet with Hongjoong one last time before becoming a married woman. you also decide to postpone a honeymoon for another time.

word count: 2010+ , tags: angst

characters: ateez (ensemble), fem!reader

⤩ CHAPTER 2 ⤩

character list . prologue . one

Turns out Jongho had a thing for weeding out the imperfections, flaws in a woman. It was easy for him, arriving no later than 11 in the morning to join both you and San after your dress fitting to do your hair.

“I can fix the hair.” The city turned country gangster’s lips grimace at the dark bags under your drooping eyes. “The makeup.. you’ll have to do on your own, sweetheart.”

You clutch on the silver necklace he’s handed you before he put his hands on your head, the thought of blessing Seonghwa with an engagement gift beyond your intentional rights. You play with the small compass charm between your fingers and gaze at your reflection in the mirror.

So you look like complete shit: lack of sleep, lack of encouragement, lack of pride. This was you in your most pitiful state and the boys could only spare mercy in your absence of excitement. You’ve always dreamed about family and weddings— the trends in modern life you were never entitled to try. Seonghwa was already giving you parts of the world you’ve always wanted and you couldn’t hate him for that. The arrangement however was something you’ll have to hold against him.

“You look beautiful.” Yunho nods in your direction after Jongho fluffs at your curled hair. “Y/n, you do. Now stop frowning and making it worse.”

You let out an upheaval sigh. “Remind me again why I have to dress up for such a casual occasion.”

San scoffs from the side still nitpicking his sleek suit. “This is your wedding, y/n. Have some respect for yourself. It’s the least you can do.”

“It’s a wedding with a man I don’t even want. And he said so himself this was more a partnership than ties of love.” You force yourself to retort in the nicest way possible. “Seonghwa has good intentions and that’s great. But my place in his heart is not something I earned and I’m far from pleased.”

“You rather woo Seonghwa? Then do it, at least, after your wedding.” Yunho charmingly places his chin over your shoulder to face you in the mirror. “This wedding is passed formalities but something he sought good for the both of you. He wants you to feel comfortable and that’s leeway enough to your heart. Accept it as it is and maybe you won’t get shot.”

You hear it so many times, you ponder over thought of maybe wanting to get shot at this point. Why was Seonghwa so prideful? What else was he hiding?

“The day he ever wants to shoot me is the day I end this partnership of his he claims is good for the both of us.”

The trio behind you pause in their movements and let your answer sink in. It’s not everyday they get to see a woman get ready to marry a man they assume to be their best friend. It certainly isn’t every day they get to see a woman as beautiful as you sit in front of them with a personality as fierce as their empty hearted boss. Although they’re intimidated, they feel a particular sense of relief knowing you’re fully aware of your circumstances. They didn’t sign up for meddling in an innocent life though you’re far from innocent.

“We have to meet some of our partners..” San clears his throat as you fumble with the jewelery in your hand. “I’m sure you won’t mind if we leave you with your thoughts for a bit.”

“Not at all.” please.

They hum in response before setting out prompt, your thoughts a little more blind in your head than they think. You look in the mirror after they leave and think to yourself that you’re just a penny of satisfaction. The best way for you to accept all this is to breathe and let it go. It’s gotten you this far.

“I hope I’m not interrupting.” A voice echoes through the slit of the door. “If you haven’t tried killing yourself already.”

Your eyes light up like a child on Christmas Day. “Hongjoong.”

His lips quirk at your tone of admiration. “You look beautiful, babe.”

Your own lips quiver and you’reholding back the years of tears. “Can you hug me please? Just this once?”

He sighs softly before coming over to take you into his arms. The homey embrace of someone you trusted— no someone who trusts you was enough to end some misery. The one thing Seonghwa could grant you that you’d thank him for was this. Hongjoong was far from what you deserve but he’s someone you wished you could have. Life served you another platter and you can’t just complain and ask for a refund.

“Of all the years I’ve known you, y/n, seeing you in a wedding gown would be the last thing I’d ever imagine.”

You roll your eyes at the city mobster before turning in your chair. “I’m surprised he let you imagine let alone show up today.”

Hongjoong presses his lips together and fumbles with his tie. “There’s a lot of things you’d be surprised by.”

You sniffle mostly to undermine all the overwhelming thoughts in your head. Hongjoong sees right through you though.

“I’m sure Seonghwa’s got good intentions. Despite the fact, obviously, I’m not all for the things he does—Beyond what he does, y/n, he’s a good guy.”

You scoff his way, looking elsewhere in your reflection afraid of his words.

“Are you here to patronize the enemy some more or walk me down the aisle?”

He chuckles wholeheartedly, coming over to plant a reassuring kiss on the top of your head. Where your father lacked, Hongjoong picked up. You can’t name a single man— no person on this planet who has made you whole enough as Hongjoong does and maybe why Seonghwa is threatened. Hongjoong is a force no one is reckoned to feel accustomed to. The city monster had ties everywhere. Feeling sorry for your father was one thing; feeling sorry for you was little of what the truth was.

“You are a gem.” He annunciations through a genuine smile. “Be it Seonghwa nor I aren’t lucky to have. You’re a blessing.”

You look into Hongjoong’s eyes with a type of everlasting loyalty you can’t define. “How can you be okay with Seonghwa having me? I was already yours..”

“Your father was mine and I let you have the benefit of the doubt.” His comment sharpens at the end.

“Losing him was nothing but means to end for you. Don’t act like it was more than that.” You try to rebuttal.

“It was something I didn’t like but it sure as hell made you happy. And so I heard.”

Hongjoong’s very casual. He likes to be hands on in a moment and is, trend wise, very different from your future husband. It’s not like you loved Hongjoong romantically or anything. It just felt wrong to need to love someone else that’s all.

“Walk down the aisle.” He whispers again against the crown of your ear, hand hovering over your bare shoulders with hesitance and grace. “I’ll always be right here when you need me the most.”

It’s some misdirection partly. Also partly your fault that you’ve gotten here. Now you’re walking down an aisle with Southside’s very own devil standing at the alter awaiting you. You don’t look back on purpose. That and Hongjoong’s grip right beside is not one on par with a fatherly gesture. Hongjoong probably wanted to wring Seonghwa for what it’s worth too.

“Past formalities?” Hongjoong mumbles when you two get one step closer to the end of your suicide mission.

“Definitely past that.”

“Knock em dead, sweetheart.”

Let the party commence.

There was little shared words between you, your new husband, and the pastor. With what seemed like false devotion and empty promises, the wedding reception began. You two sat together on a podium where it’s pretty obvious Seonghwa’s treated like royalty. You were right in his district and with first impressions comes clear boundaries to be made. He wanted you to know where he stands. You two sat together as husband and wife but complete strangers. It was awkward watching the sight of men come and go to prove that Seonghwa was nothing but a merciless mafia boss. The gifts weren’t even of your benefit either.

Hongjoong left early (something you’ll press against him some other day forward) and you were stuck thinking about when this cursed day was going to end. Somehow someway it did and you were in a car fraternizing with the enemy this time.

“— So you married me instead?”

The air gets thick. It almost gets so thick you think you’re getting some type of allergic reaction to his face in the confinement of his wide vehicle. Staring at him was no gut wrenching eye sore but it’s not something you were used to just yet. Seonghwa’s eyes matched the color of war— red with fury and relent. There was something there that his calm tone didn’t quite express to it’s fullest capability.

“You’d rather be dead?”

His coldness reflected on you. It’s probably your body’s natural mechanism of defense coming to play because you’re sure as hell you’re not gonna let some man control you for the rest of your life. No, you may not get that right to speak up and say something that might as well get you killed but you still aren’t gonna let him walk all over you.

“Are you gonna get out of your dress or did you want me to strip you out of it for you instead?”

His tone persists as he emerges from the bathroom to see you sitting on solemn. You glance up tiredly at the cheeky bastard who’s lips perk at your attention. You look away without a word at all before taking your dress off without further notice.

His throat clams up at the sight, unsure of how long his self constraint would last even for the night. The sight of your broadened narrow shoulders— bare and ready to taste— was something he was definitely not prepared for. His hands tremble as the damp towel between his fingers drops and you glance to look at him.

“Tempted?” You rasp in the most taunting voice you could fabricate. “Mind me, but you asked if I was going to get out of my dress, Seonghwa. I’m showing you that I can follow basic instructions, was that not what you asked of me? Of this partnership.”

He chokes on that, jaw clenched. “Pressing my buttons, honey, is not something I suggest you test.”

You hold your dress up back to your chest as you turn to face him. “I’m just letting you know what kind of wife you gambled to marry, my sweet husband.”

He nearly screams the moment you slam the bathroom door. Not realizing on both sides that either of you were ready to combust. You shower the anger, the resentment away and Seonghwa just lays back on his bed staring at the bathroom door.

He needs to stay away from you at any time possible. Until he learns to control himself at least. Living with a woman, a woman of his absurd dreams, was proving itself difficult. You weren’t just gonna give yourself up to him just like that either.

“Sleep. You have a busy day tomorrow.” Is all he says before turning on his back when you shut the lights off.

You stare at it. Like the night before when he got in bed without even saying a word, feeling cold.

“J-Just me?” You ask propped still on your elbow in the dark.

“I have business to take care of in the city. You’ll have San and Yunho tomorrow.” His voice lulls deeper as he’s getting pulled to his exhaustion. “It’s training you have to endure just in case. Hongjoong informed me you never took part in your father’s extravaganza’s and I need to know my wife is safe while I leave.”

“You want me to learn how to fight?”

“Something like that..”

@atinybitofau

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Text

making a tag list for the following

HONEY Seonghwa fic

BED OF ROSES San fic

individual member content.

? how to request ?

msg me either via PM or INBOX

ex.) “tag list for hongjoong” “tag list for HONEY”

that’s it LMAO

* these tag lists will not be posted with the actual post. I will be linking the content in a separate one to keep character count as low as possible.

* I will be closing taglist requests on 09/10/2020

TANKK UUUUUU

#♥️#taglist prompt #tag list #faq #pls request asap

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Text

S E O N G H W A ⥈ mafia au series

RECAP: southside’s little devil brings you home to his boss and you both spend the night together for the first time. the next day is filled with eventful surprises. serves purpose, it’s about time you meet your future husband.

word count: 2600+ , tags: angst fluff

characters: ateez (ensemble), reader

⤩ CHAPTER 1 ⤩

prologue . character list

It started with childish attraction and before he knew it, obsession. Seonghwa wanted to know where you were, what you were doing, who you were with— he wanted you on his mind 24/7. If not his mind, in his peripheral. And like San says, he’s a petulant man. If he was offered the oppurtunity to not move a finger, he’ll take it. And though getting you was easy, learning to have you was proving itself difficult already.

Hongjoong had his own desires and call it jealousy but Seonghwa didn’t like the fact Hongjoong had the most beautiful woman wrapped around his finger. Knowing you were already somehow bound to city side, Seonghwa wanted to take you out of it as soon as possible. To him, you were a prize that he wanted. A prize that he couldn’t lose to Hongjoong. He’s already lost enough to the city scum.

You woke up remembering the bed dipped a little late at night. San was very hospitable in your arrival and you weren’t exactly mourning your father’s death— moreso exhausted that it took so long.

The moment you arrived, you were content on taking a nice cold shower and heading to bed. After settling down a little, inhaling this new scent you were forced to familiar with, you laxed in solemn lonesome and buried yourself in a bed that wasn’t yours. At first, it were strange to you the string of events that happened in no less than 24 hours now. You came to accept it as easily as you did to your fathers gruesome history. While you slept however, the scent you lulled to strengthened and a presence you’ve never felt was suddenly there.

Seonghwa was quiet; relaxed and seeming stressed enough not to care that you were already sleeping on the other half of his bed. He fell asleep beside you that night and you only glanced at his back for a brief minute before closing your eyes again. You woke up to the same silence Seonghwa arrived in and his scent lingered away.

On Seonghwa’s mind, he can feel you staring. He can feel your curiosity and it feeds his desires more. He can’t explain how hard it is not to turn around and face you. Tell you what he’s feeling, how he feels, how he sees you. A beautiful woman rightfully his. And in no means was Seonghwa an insolent man, albeit a little sinister when he needs to be, but he respects you. He see’s you fit to share his position and he’d have it no other way with you sleeping at his bedside.

He fucking deserves it.

He wakes up and brushes his finger softly against the bone of your cheek before getting up to leave not even 4 hours later. He’s got enough sleep and no doubt it’s because of you. He has a lot of things to do before he gets to marry you the day after today.

“Good morning, hot stuff.” San flirtatiously licks at his lips, finger pushing his glass frames when he catches Seonghwa strut through the door. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.”

“I’m an engaged man, San.” The elder pairs with an eye roll.

“Boohoo, cry me a fucking river.” Still annoyed at most, San slips him a plate of food at 4 o’clock in the morning. “And what’s our lucky future bride-to-be doing?”

The always furrowed Seonghwa smiles at the mention of you. “Sleeping. What else is there to do?”

“Mhm. Yet here you are bright and early ready to do what again? Hyung, you just got back from overseas. I’m sure Yunho and I can handle y/n’s endeavors for the day. After all, it’s just a dress fitting. How hard can it be?”

Seonghwa whips a glare at satan’s little assistant, teeth gritting at the thought of leaving you with a bunch of imbeciles.

“Being with y/n may be very tedious. Which is why I’ve called Jongho from his activities in Gangnam to join you. And I didn’t get up this early to save grace, Sannie. I got up to meet with the big city’s big man to win y/n’s hand a little more.” Seonghwa pokes his fork at San’s direction. “Don’t sulk at me. I don’t want my fiancé running for the hills before I can even marry her.”

The hitman bellows before sulking anyway. “Remind me again why you’re marrying a woman this soon? For fucksake, Hwa, you’re 22. We haven’t even tried covering Gangwon’s territory and you’re already celebrating our loss.”

Seonghwa rubs at his temples remembering what his bigger tasks at hand were. Why he was often traveling than resting as he should. He thinks a woman can fix his mental issues, his stresses. He may be wrong but for what it’s worth, trying to beat out another gang of territory can be exhausting. Remembering that you slept in his bed, under his roof, with his name? Is rest assured enough. He doesn’t need much more than that.

“Hongjoong has a lot to offer.” Seonghwa reminds San of why he may lose in the first place. “Getting Gangwon under my power is not an easy thing for me to do, San. I have to go through many lengths to get it. And Hongjoong gets too many privelages as the city’s big man.”

“And by privelages you mean the president’s fucking cock of a son. That spoiled little—“

“Yeosang may be spoiled but he’s still wrapped around Jongho’s finger; Jongho still working for me.” He recalls having the upper hand and even if San must remind him of reality, he must remind San who’s stronger. “My main concern as of right now still stands by the woman wearing my engagement ring. And if Hongjoong got to her first I might as well have lost Gangwon all together.”

San feels defeated at the statement. Both indefinitely and so. He just wants Seonghwa to be happy. Most of the time, the things he does.. he works for Seonghwa for that reason. When San was looking for a way out, southside’s own prodigy gave him the little hope he needed. Hongjoong was a pawn in this game he was willing to toss out. San didn’t like enemies. He didn’t like losing. And he sure as hell didn’t like new roles, new things.

Not that he didn’t like you. He just didn’t like the reason why you were here.

“So you marry her. Yeah sure.” The younger of the duo shakes in pure distaste. “You marry the poor girl and that makes it easier for you or easier for the situation you have?”

Seonghwa knows of San’s concerns and he hears them loud and clear. “Y/n serves an important purpose in my success. I’m as greedy and heartless as they come but sometimes I still am a human being, San. Though I prosper at evils, I deserve some type of compensation. I deserve her.”

“Talk to Yunho about that and we’ll see if you still feel the same.”

Seonghwa leaves San that morning to ease the tension between them. He knows sharing a house with a man who cares for him too much and a woman who doesn’t is going to start domestic problems. He was still adjusting to the new set up and so was San. The black haired devil may be a little conniving but San will come around to you eventually. He just needs time.

The way you do with Seonghwa.

Speaking of time, it moves and you’ve dress fit and meet the new people of your life with not much response. In fact, you assumed that the fitting would draw you closer to amends with your circumstances. Unfortunately you fell short of that. You felt a little left out and you also felt uncertain with your place as Seonghwa’s new wife.

You were dying to meet your future husband personally. And you can tell, though you fond San’s company, he may not exactly be fond of you. In terms of: living with him and marrying his best friend at least. You give him some credit though since you’re normally a patient woman. Yunho on the other hand seemed quiet and never outspoken. Jongho too. You wonder if time will give them some respects towards you and you hope they don’t make your life a living hell. It’s already pretty bad and you don’t want it to be worse.

You wait in Seonghwa’s bedroom, the hands of the clock being the only side to drown your thoughts. Your wedding dress hangs mockingly over the closet door and you blink with every second that passes. You even count to make time go faster. San’s doing something with Yunho downstairs in the basement and Jongho’s somewhere making noise in the kitchen. It was hard to hear if Seonghwa was home. But the eerie silence that grew in the house, that weird tension that was there when you woke up this morning. It’s there again.

You don’t know why your heart bounces at the sound of footsteps.

You want to meet him.

This was going to be your husband for fucksake.

“Oh.” You only see his silhouette over the bright lights in the hall when he breaks the silence. “You’re still awake.”

You don’t say a word as he shuts the door and strips out of his suit jacket. He runs a tongue over his lips and the light in the bedroom hovers his features now. He’s just as gorgeous as San describes. Actually you think you’ve seen him before. He’s got protruding cheekbones, prominent lips, dark eyebrows and dark eyes that scream heaven in hell. You know that face. That’s Park Seonghwa of course. But you know that face because you’ve seen it many times before.

Your father used to owe him too much. Obviously, he’s the man your father sold you out to.

“You aren’t tired?” He questions breaking your condescending thoughts.

“Hardly.” Your voice is hoarse when you finally speak after countless hours of not saying anything at all. “I wouldn’t consider dress hunting to be much of a tiresome activity.”

“The boys would argue otherwise. They tell me you’re a picky woman.” His chuckle vibrates even in your chest.

You start to realize you want to like him but you can’t. He’s just so nice. He talks like he’s known you for years. He smiles like this settlement doesn’t hurt you. Like being sold and arranged to marry him isn’t heart clenching. You hate him and it’s going to be hard to change that.

The adjustment period might take longer than you initially thought.

“I-I’m y/n.”

“I know, sweetheart.” He turns to you with a soft glare and smiles. He reminds you of somebody. He reminds you of someone you used to love. “I’ve known you longer than you’ve known me.”

You highly doubt that.

“I met with Hongjoong today.” He tangents with pure consideration. “He asks if you’re still mourning.”

Not really paying attention at first, you ask for him to reiterate. “What?”

“Your father.”

You’re not sure how Seonghwa sees you out of this set up. You’d think a person might be a little peeved by your immoral senses considering you put a hit out on your own father. Although, this person was someone who killed meaningless lives on a daily. Provokes the evils in people, maybe. And you indirectly ask your future husband you’ve never met before to kill a man who worked for the enemy: your dad. You don’t want to assume he’s egging you on but you somehow think he’s just being courteous.

“Why would I be mourning my father when I asked someone to kill him for me?”

Seonghwa’s smile is as dark as hell’s deepest point. “So you’re happy.”

“I’m ecstatic.” Your tongue seethes against your tightened teeth and Seonghwa’s flustered in the attraction he has for you.

He overanalyzes the way your eyes gleam and how your lips drool through someone else’s blood shed. You were a cold hearted bitch. And damn does he live for it. He loves to see it. And he wants all of it.

Yeah, he definitely wants you.

“Well I’m glad I had the pleasure of making your wishes come true.”

He stands up again while looking at the white dress hanging from his wall. He seems a little struck, pauses to look at it a little longer. Like at you, when he walked through his bedroom door a couple minutes ago.

You want to like him, you do. But it’s already proving itself difficult and you haven’t even married him yet. His answers were to simple. His questions felt half assed and far from curious. He’s a hard devil to trust and from your pasts, you don’t like dishonesty.

“You met with Hongjoong. Which means you went into the city today.” You urge a response from the frozen man who blatantly gazes at the dress you chose to marry him with. “Are you two still fighting for the territory up north? Where my father was initially going to be transferred to.”

Seonghwa’s back tenses at what you ask and you can see it even through his thick materialed shirt. “Questions get you in trouble, y/n. Keep that in mind the next time you want to get brave enough to pry.”

“As your fiancée, I think I get the right to pry. So deal with it.”

“We leave for the venue tomorrow at 10.” He unwraps the leather of his watch and turns off the red blinking light in the corner of the room. “I know he’s your old friend so Hongjoong has been cordially invited and with the rest of his fools. So I suggest you don’t make me look bad and our partnership will start on light feet.”

“Partnership?” You scoff wanting to stand. Though you shouldn’t, you definitely want to. “Is that what you’re calling this? What you forced me into?”

“An arrangement of sorts. A partnership that leads to both our success.” He turns to you and shows you his other side. A side you have to adjust to already. “This is no longer your choice and you either are gonna stay with me or stay without me. I’m gonna give you the option to leave right now if you want.”

He’s halfassing you and you don’t need binoculuars to see past his bullshit. The devil in him is just begging to be let out.

“I wasn’t blessed with the right to choose nor was I blessed with the right to care. If it’s me you want, it’s me you’ll have. I was never happy and I’m sure that’s not gonna change even if I stay or go.”

His smirk deepens at your tenacity. He likes it. He likes it a lot.

“Good.” His tongue rubs across his already wet lips. “I’m glad we’ve come to an agreement.”

“Fucking bite me.”

You don’t plan to ever say that again. Cause you sleep in the same goddamn bed with him. And let’s just say they were right when they said Seonghwa doesn’t like when people answer back.

“Well isn’t he nice.” You hoarsely mumble to yourself while rubbing at your swollen eyes.

Your fingers play with a note left on his side’s pillow and you open it to read that you were set to prepare for the wedding. You bathe and change as if the house was already yours and meet with San who was prepping breakfast in the kitchen. You remind yourself in the halls to explore a little more when the time’s given.

“Good morning.” You greet sitting by the counter, eyes chasing his rushing figure.

“Yup. Sure.” He hums while sliding you a plate, all in the while fixing his suit and tie. “—This damn shirt. I told that asshole I wasn’t going to wear this shit.”

“What?” You chuckle before reaching over to fix his collar. “A suit?”

He absentmindedly groans while glaring at you help him. “I’m a turtle neck enthusiast. Buttons are my worst enemy and we’re clearly past formal appointments with our line of work. Since I can’t, please do me the solid favor of choking your husband in his sleep.”

“Duly noted.” You pat his shirt when you’re done and fix your his disheveled hair. “Speaking of the groom, he left this morning and didn’t say a word. He left a note though saying I was to prepare for the wedding. Care to elaborate?”

San threads his fingers back through his hair, glaring his eyes at you an a casual manner. As if his eyes were meant to stare that way.

“You’re getting married in the next 3 hours. What else is there to elaborate?”

@atinybitofau

a/n: rough edit

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Note

Whats it like being the best au writer in the fandom

feeling hella bad cause I haven’t posted in a bit 😭😭

#practicing my writing again #it’s besn a while folks #q&a

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Note

Are you gonna continue with the Seonghwa mafia au?💖💖💖

yes ma’am ;)

#literally IM SO SORRY #im trying to get my mojo again #i need some practice lmaooo #but it’s in the works i promiseeee #faq

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Note

Lol road to kingdom really be snatching stans left and right lol welcome to the fandom m8

😭😭 girl don’t even get me STARTED. I bought 6 albums and I’m— they snatched my wig and my goddamn wallet

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Text

Okay bruh. I know I’m an ateez blog but listen

I kind of want to start the boyz soon 😭😭

#ima do it #dont dare me guys #ateez will still be priority but since theyve been inactiveeeee #ive found a second love #and omg im in D E E P #THE BOYZ #the boyz

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atinybitofau · 4 years

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when ateez comes back I come back lol. sorry ya’ll my mind has been blank ever since I started back at work. endless hours and little time, I don’t want to give you guys half assed content. I’ll be back soon I promise!

#im so sorry 🥺#pls forgive me #update

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Text

sorry I haven’t been updating. 😭 I picked up soooo many hours last week for work. But tomorrow I’ll have something for you guys.

#love ya #sorryyyy #😭😭#im crying #update

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atinybitofau · 4 years

Text

[Ateez] Friends with Benefits | Yeosang

How it started

you already were best friends for quite some time

through good and bad you would always be there for each other

you were quite close to the other members as well

but just not as close as Yeosang and you were

the both of you just clicked

and you really appreciated that you and Yeosang could always talk honestly with each other

one night you both went out for some drinks

you and Yeosang were just a drunk mess at some point

and low and behold

you kissed

then went back to your apartment

and you hooked up

next morning you woke up next to your friend naked in bed and hungover

when you saw the condom wrapper on the ground you actually lost it for a second

and then kicked Yeosang awake

he took quite a while to finally wake up and realise what had happened

and when he did

he just let out this really loud sigh

and ran his hand through his messy hair

you both stayed in the bed and talked

neither of you could remember the act itself

in his opinion it was the perfect opportunity to just brush everything away

just forget what had happened

so that’s what you both decided to do

and neither of you talked about it for weeks

until then, a few weeks later, when Yeosang came over to your place

he actually hinted at the idea of a friends with benefits relationship

you were a little suspicious by his change from forgetting everything to hinting at the idea

so you openly confronted him

cause you were always honest with each other

and you weren’t gonna stop that because of a hookup

he wasn’t gonna lie to you

he was sexually frustrated

and he found himself having dirty thoughts about you since that night

you actually had felt a little bad of not remembering that night

your memory usually never failed you

you were hesitant but then agreed

and this time Yeosang made sure that you’d remember him pounding into you for eternity

How it went

there are no specific rules you both set

just to be honest with each other

and only do things you both feel comfortable with

what you should do in any healthy kind of relationship tbh

you’d mainly do it at your place

occasionally at the dorm

but you’d make sure no one else was at the dorm when you did ofc

you were hanging out a lot anyways

so it would just go from chilling somewhere

to him pounding into you

sometimes when you two were just hanging out

he’d steal little kisses when no one was looking

and you started thinking that maybe

just maybe

Yeosang wanted more

but after all

it was a friends with benefits relationship

the both of you were free

so you went on a date

trying to push the thought away

it wasn’t a good date

you actually couldn’t stop thinking about how much more fun you’d have just hanging out with Yeosang

when you had told him about your failed date

Yeosang actually felt bad for you

but you could tell that there was more

he just wasn’t telling you

he wasn’t being entirely honest with you

How it ended

you noticed he was distancing himself for a few days after that

always politely declining your invitations

so you went over to the dorm and confronted him

and then Yeosang confessed

confessed of remembering something from that evening

it was more like a flashback that came to him when you were playing around with San

throwing three little words around

the three little words that rolled off your tongue before Yeosang and you both passed out from the alcohol

you reassured him that you might feel attracted to him and loved him as a best friend

but that you didn’t love him like that

after all

you were drunk

Yeosang understood

then admitted that he was seeing someone he really liked, hoping that it would be official soon

you felt happy for him

but you were also a little hurt

you were extremely attracted to him

and really thought that with some more time it might could’ve been more

that he might’ve wanted more

but he didn’t

you were his best friend

not his girlfriend/boyfriend

and he wanted to go back to just being best friends

you understood that

thanked him for his honesty and left

you actually didn’t realise how much it hurt until a few days after

when Yeosang told you he was now dating

you felt awkward and crushed

even when you were hanging out with the other members all together

so this time it was you who distanced themselves for a while

until Yeosang came busting through your door

yes he has a key

he told you he gave you enough space

that you were his best friend

so you went back to your rule of honesty

telling him the way you felt

Yeosang understood that this ending was easier for him than for you

he understood that you weren’t really in love with him

it was more of a crush

and that it was the thought of it evolving into more that hurt you a lot

that you thought you both could love each other and be happy

he knew that it was sort of a break up

yet no end to your friendship

even thought he was now dating

he wouldn’t let you avoid him any longer

you’d hang out more and more again

even if it was a little forced in the beginning

you actually found comfort in talking to San about what happened

but he already knew

you thought it was a secret but ateez ain’t dumb, they knew, they saw the little kisses Yeosang gave you skskskks

San helped you

and the fact that Yeosang didn’t let you go

and did everything so you could remain best friends

saved your relationship

and you went back to being best friends

you realised that you didn’t want to risk losing Yeosang as your best friend

even though you maybe were still kinda hurting

and maybe it wasn’t just a harmless crush

Hongjoong | Seonghwa | San | Wooyoung

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