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Ren: So I know ants can’t die from falling but like do you think they get scared?
Ann: What do you mean they can’t die from falling? Can we get a fact check on this?
Makoto: Basically the terminal velocity of an ant is too slow and its exoskeleton is too strong to kill it from the impact of a fall from any height.
Ren: But no one has addressed the important question??? Do they get scared????
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I always hated the phrase “I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.” So? Get some better enemies. Soft ass.
- Akechi
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The characters in Jaws can’t hear the score so it’s not actually that tense for them.
- Ryuji
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Makoto: Today I learned that NASA has been launching jellyfish into space since the 90′s. Originally 2,478 were sent up and there were 60,000 orbiting Earth by the mission’s end 20 years later. The jellyfish that have returned reportedly “hate life on Earth.”
Morgana: Do you want to birth an Eldridge horror? This is how you birth an Eldridge horror.
Ann: I want to know how they decided that they hate life on Earth.
Ren: I mean, who doesn’t?
Makoto: The “jellyfish that have returned” are the offspring of the ones they sent up; they “hate life on Earth” because they were born into a world without gravity- no direction, different kinds of pressure, so when they return they have trouble adapting and “jellyfish babies, at least, have to deal with massive vertigo on Earth after spending their first few days in space,” which you can tell because you can measure how disoriented a jellyfish is compared with normal behavior. TL;DR your cthulu is an infant with a migraine.
Haru: I have SO MANY questions, re:the jellyfish space habitat. I mean I guess it’s probably just an airtight aquarium on board the ISS, but I read it the first several times as the jellyfish were just floating in open space.
Ryuji: To be honest, when I read “NASA has been launching jellyfish into space for years” my initial mental image was just NASA with a giant slingshot flinging jellyfish after jellyfish into the void.
Futaba: Weeee!
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Quick question, is it “for fucks sake”or “for fuck sake”? It’s for a work email so it has to sound professional.
- Makoto
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Winning is for winners.
- Ryuji
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Fuck algebra I don’t need it just give me a dead body and I’ll figure it out from there
- Akechi
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Akira, responding in the most annoying voice he can do: heyyyy bestie!!! 🤪🤪
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Akechi: Here’s a picture of me doing blood magic.
Ryuji: But the picture’s blank.
Akechi: That’s right kids I don’t do blood magic keep the maker in your hearts and be like me
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Ryuji: I, like, got this splatoon stuck on my ceiling and I’m not able to get it down.
Morgana: Just leave it, it’ll come down eventually.
Ryuji, later: you’re not going to believe what object dislodged itself from the ceiling and began its descent to the floor, creating a loud meaty shlap sound upon impact, waking me up in the tender hours of the night.
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Ryuji: I wanna be a bartender.
Ryuji: Men named bart look out.
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Can’t stop thinking about people that first ate mushrooms they found and just had to go through trial and error of like, this one tastes like beef, this one killed Brian immediately and this one makes you see G-d for a week.
- Haru
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When you tell a girl her outfit is really cute and she does a little pose thing then smiles. Reblog if you agree.
- Ann, definitely
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“I’m just vibing” you have not eaten a vegetable in 17 days.
- Ann
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Morgana: You get turned back into a baby but you retain all your skills and memory, what do you do?
Ren: Eat a nickel.
Morgana: A reminder, you have retained all your skills and memories.
Ren. Eat a nickel.
Morgana: Okay.
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