lifeofanoxymoron

[lifeofanoxymoron]

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[lifeofanoxymoron]

We were never a match made in heaven, darling. There was too much fire in the way your hands touched my body, the flames that rose in my chest told me that we are a match made in hell.

Nikita Gill (via meanwhilepoetry)

[lifeofanoxymoron]

FROM THE VAULT: Olivia Gatwood & Megan Falley - “Collapse the Economy”

“Thank you for making us invisible. That way, you’ll never see us coming.” 

Performing for NYC-Urbana during prelims at the 2014 National Poetry Slam. Subscribe to Button on YouTube!

[lifeofanoxymoron]

Writers end up writing about their obsessions. Things that haunt them; things they can’t forget; stories they carry in their bodies waiting to be released.

Natalie Goldberg (via nightesaur)

[lifeofanoxymoron]

We all have that one teacher that made us who we are today. 

Sarah Kay - “Mrs Ribeiro”

“My world was the size of a crayon box, and it took every color to draw her.”

Sarah Kay, performing at Inner City Arts in Los Angeles. Subscribe to Button on YouTube!

#amen #love

[lifeofanoxymoron]

No expectations. No disappointment.

If you hold no expectations then you get no disappointment, common sense and we all know it to be true. And yet we meet one person who we expect to fill the empty void you feel that has been created from multiple attacks, self-inflicted and inflicted by others. We never sense the expectations in us start to build but as each one gets broken and cracked from underneath you, you finally look down and realize you are about to fall. We tell ourselves no more, we say ‘I’M DONE’ and yet inside all of us is that small voice hoping that we are proven wrong. You find that every song some how relates back to you, that the universe is telling you to look deeper and you will realize that you're expectations will be met. But I realized that to say that you don't want to create expectations so you aren't disappointed is the most selfish thing you could ever do for yourself! To hold a person to no expectations is giving them a pass to walk over you, to let someone in your life that can break the rules and break your expectations is you trying to save your ass from heartbreak and disappointment. But you need the disappointment to show you how many people can live up those expectations and that their isn't anything wrong with your expectations there is something wrong with them. You just don't want to give them up because you don't want to disappoint YOURSELF.

#truthbetold #personal rant #sorry for the rant #disappointment #no expectations #i'm so sorry #get over it #stay strong

[lifeofanoxymoron]

I have ruined relationships for fear of ruining those relationships.

Neil Hilborn (via bewilderedapprehension)

[lifeofanoxymoron]

21 my father is run over by a car he’s passed out in the road with a blood alcohol content four times the legal limit I do not cry four months later the nurses lose his pulse and I wonder whose life flashed before his eyes rewinding VHS tapes old home videos 20 19 I haven’t brought a friend home in four years 18 my mother sips the word divorce her mouth curls at the taste like it burns going down 17 I start doing homework at Starbucks I have more meaningful conversations with the barista then with my family 16 I wait for Christmas Eve my brother and I usually exchange gifts to one another early this year he and my father exchange blows my mother doesn’t go to mass 15 I come up with the theory that my father started drinking again because maybe he found out I’m gay like if he could make everything else blurry maybe somehow I’d look straight 15 my mother cleans up his vomit in the middle of the night and cooks breakfast in the morning like she hasn’t lost her appetite 15 I blame myself 15 my brother blames everyone else 15 my mother blames the dog 15 super bowl sunday my father bursts trough the door like an avalanche picking up speed and debris as he falls banisters coffee tables picture frames tumbling stumbling I find his AA chip on the kitchen counter 14 my father’s been sober for ten maybe eleven years I just know we don’t even think about it anymore 13 12 11 mom tells me daddy’s meetings are for AA she asks if I know what that means I don’t I nod anyway 10 my parents never drink wine at family gatherings all my other aunts and uncles do I get distracted by the TV and forget to ask why 9 8 7 6 I wanna be spider man or my dad they’re kinda the same 5 4 3 I have a nightmare the reoccurring one about Ursula from the little mermaid so I get up I waddle toward mommy and daddy’s room blankie in hand I pause daddy’s standing in his underwear silhouetted by a refrigerator light he raises a bottle to his lips 2 1 0 when my mother was pregnant with me I wonder if she hoped as so many mothers do that her baby boy would grow up to be just like his father

Patrick Roche “21” (via dxrlingsparks)

#beautiful #loveit #amazing

[lifeofanoxymoron]

what you see

I was sad and blue I was old and bruising I was  like that broken leaf that never got to fall I was the red balloon that no one could catch but to you I was not sad and blue Instead I was like the sky some blues darker than others but together it made the most beautiful hue Each shade changing with the mood but even during my storms even when I thought the flood was endless you saw the most epic storm not needing to be tamed but needing to be let out you didn't search for a rainbow you didn't search for something better no you looked right up at me and played in the rain loving the look of each shade mixing and separating. To you I was not the broken leave that never got to fall I was the strongest leaf of them all holding on for dear life and never breaking I was waiting to fall waiting for people to stop telling me when and how to fall. you know that i never truly fell instead i sky dived instead i jumped expecting to end it all only for you to pick me up and call me the most” important leaf of human history” not because of my jump but because of my potential because of one simple leap i created a new story a story that ends up to be the best You look at me as if I’m absurd calling myself a lonely red balloon you look at me wondering is that really what I think I am and then you look at me in the eyes finally connecting with me showing me a glimpse of not a lonely red balloon but a red balloon escaping the hell floating up to match the shades in the sky passing one simple leaf and causing it to fall you don't see me sad and blue you see endless and blue

#poetry #couple #so true

[lifeofanoxymoron]

She’s something odd and uncertain, half of her was made of stars, full of death and filled with light; her other half was made of scars, full of life and filled with darkness.

VàZaki Nada (via wnq-writers)

[lifeofanoxymoron]

#love cute

[lifeofanoxymoron]

Grief

My father passed away nine years ago, I was eight. I do not remember much before my life as an eight year old but I what I do remember was the awful things that father did. He was mean, abusive and absent from my life but always willing to tell me what I did wrong (Yes, this was when I was eight and could barely even spell) and I love him I truly do. But today as I get close to graduation High school I realize how much I miss him and how much I wish he was here but the dilemma is that I know that that is illogical because of the emotional and occasional physical abuse he caused me and my four older siblings. I feel as if my emotions have betrayed me and it’s a hard grieving time for me. 

#dead dad #young #death #complaining #no one cares

[lifeofanoxymoron]

Sherlock is not a robot

It always pisses me off that the gifs always show Sherlock as a robot that doesn't feel anything. He does feel, I think that the feels the most out of all of us because he can see what other people do to others. He sees how harsh the world is and the people he deems as friends are people that he trusts not to hurt him even though he can every possible out come he still chooses to love his friends even though he doesn't show it like normal people.

#bendict sherlock SuperWhoLock IamSHERlocked

[lifeofanoxymoron]

SPN Family

I’m proud to be a Hunter. And I love this fandom. I mean, we rule Tumblr because :

First : 

which, is quite amazing.

Then, we have amazing characters :

But also the most adorable actors :

And, a lot of other things like…

Well, that’s quite why I do love my Fandom. And you guys :

[lifeofanoxymoron]

[lifeofanoxymoron]

This part made me tear up not gonna lie

The whole way from Dorne all anyone talked about was the monster that had been born to Tywin Lannister.

[lifeofanoxymoron]

Even the people who made tumblr knew that it's addicting and we will become obsessed it's like it was written for fan girls!

#ohshit #tumblr #awkward