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I am no mother, I am no bride, I am King

(King - Florence + The Machine)

#art #florence and the machine #micron pens #fanart #i cant think of anything funny to put here #drawing #finelinerart #king florence and the machine

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Posca pen shenanigans!

#drawing #poscamarkers #art #the amazing devil #the horror and the wild #florence and the machine #dance fever #fanart #look at those colors #aaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Okay fuck it if this post reaches 666k notes by the end of 2023 I'll practise basic self care

Why 666k? Because it's funny and impossible so good fucking luck

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i will never forgive joey batey and madeline hyland for adding wild blue yonder lyrics to the background of welly boots

it broke me

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why did no one tell me that just before the four minute mark of Welly Boots you can faintly hear joey singing the chorus of Wild Blue Yonder. its during the whole "I know you're strong enough" part and I just hear the "filled with wonder" this changes things like when Joey sings about not being able to hear him because she's screaming. oh my god

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HOLY SHIT THAT FITS SO WELL! BURN BUTCHER WHO??

it’s been a million years and i now have a stockpile of jaskier art from twitter i might as well upload here, enjoy jaskier singing blossoms at geralt

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This fandom is the reason i ended up listening to that song in the first place and now i can’t actually remember how the song itself goes but i’ll forever remember it cuz ‘it’s take me to church but people are actively having a better time’

YES if a singer covers a song by an artist of the opposite gender and changes the pronouns so it “isn’t gay” they are a coward but there is one case in which an artist can cover a song and change the pronouns and somehow make it actively gayer and the song is Bedroom Hymns and the singer is Hozier

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Wait,

Vent art actually works once you do it being honest with yourself and not worrying about what other people will think of you because of it..?

Well fuck…

#mental health #coping #healing #holy shit

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The big twist of Shadow and Bone truly was that the actual third amplifier was the friends we made along the way

#grishaverse #shadow and bone #mal oretsev #alina starkov #amplifier #i know this isnt funny but just let me have this

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This will be one hell of a first post.

TW: this post does talk about self harm and self destructive behaviors. Please proceed with caution or scroll past if these are touchy or difficult topics. Reading this will not be worth any of the problems that might rise from those issues. Please be safe.

So last spring my mental health spiraled. It had already been in a bit of a though spot for the past fourish years, then it really got messy in 2020 and by the time i finally started high school it was getting out of hand. I had a multi month long mental breakdown last fall followed by a slightly better period that then kept getting worse until the spiral in spring.

It ultimately got so bad that i started punching/kicking doors and walls, screaming and throwing stuff around my room. Ultimately, i found, the best way to handle those difficult feelings was self harm. And so i did. It wasn’t anything big, it honestly just looked like scratches. But it was enough to numb the intense feelings.

I was fortunate enough that for me, this all has stopped as the spiral has eased. I still have difficult moments during which i feel absolutely horrible, but i have not physically harmed myself since spring, which is a good thing!

Today i talked with a friend and they mentioned The Butterfly Project as a way to possibly handle difficult emotions. I found the idea quite sweet but also acknowledged that i do not deal with physical self harm anymore, which is what the project is amied at.

However just beacuse i do not cut myself anymore, it doesn’t mean that i wouldn’t still deal with self harming or self destructive behaviors of other sorts. Many have quite possibly already pointed out that self harm can also be harming yourself in ways that aren’t cutting. It also isn’t always physical. People can put themselves in situations that could purposely trigger them or go out of their way to find fex. media that can make the feeling worse. These are both things that i have recently realized i deal with.

So, we made a few tweaks to the project. For myself, instead of cutting the thing that will kill the butterfly is going to be those self destructive behaviors. Meaning, if i get the urge to maybe watch something that i know fully well can absolutely trigger those harmful thoughts or feelings or i start interacting with media that gives me an opportunity to return to those very negative emotions, i will draw a butterfly. And if i end up engaging in that behavior it will kill the butterflies.

To be honest, it was kind of a crazy thing to realize that doing it like this would be really difficult at least for a while. But that is an excellent reason to do this in the first place, after all, if it was easy i wouldn’t need to do it.

As for why i’m even writing this, it’s to not engage in that behavior that will make me spiral. I’m also sad to announce that before i wrote this i did already start doing it, so my first butterfly, or in this particular case ig it would be a moth, died before i even drew it on my arm. On a positive note, it can only get better from here.

The name friend’s name has been covered for privacy reasons, but i still wanted show off the moth boy. Also if anyone has suggestions for how to show that a butterfly/butterflies have died that would be great.

Thank you for reading this far into this post. If you happen to be someone also doing this, i’m proud of you. It takes a lot to even start a lot to keep going. It also takes a lot of pain to get to that point and i am so proud that you’re still here. 💛

#the butterfly project #mental health