#...it indirectly implies there is a point where you can slide into being 'invalid' and it does the same thing i used to do...

[uncanny-tranny]

Trans people, please don't rely on other people to tell you if your experiences or identity is valid.

It is a very human thing to seek understanding and validation (humans are social creatures and whatnot), but seeking people to tell you that who you are is valid places a ton of power in others. What happens when somebody tells you that they don't think you're valid?

And at the end of the day, it doesn't matter if your identity is "valid" or not to other people. What matters is if your identity suits you. You aren't a robot who lives at the behest of others, who can change the core of your being at the drop of a hat. You will continue to exist as you are with or without validation and with or without permission.

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #when i was young i sought being told i'm valid because my environment told me i wasn't... #...but then i felt distress when i was told i wasn't valid because that's what i've been told all my life... #...nobody should have the power to take away your identity or anything like that... #...and i gave people the power to do that. i put way too much trust in strangers and they decided if they wanted me to hurt or not... #...this is why i personally dislike the posts saying '[x] is valid!'... #...it indirectly implies there is a point where you can slide into being 'invalid' and it does the same thing i used to do... #...i think more people ought to embrace that it doesn't matter what OTHERS think of who you ARE. that's shit you can't change... #...i can't convince people i am valid if they think i am not. i'm not wasting my time and energy and safety in order to fight people... #...if you think my identity is 'invalid' or 'valid' is of no consequence to me. you don't hold the power to make me change... #...i will continue to exist as i am and so will you... #...learn to embrace the idea that nobody can or should hold power over you to tell you if you're right in your identity or not #this is a really oversimplification but i'm trying to type this out as fast as i can before going to work again lol #this is NOT meant to disparage or shame people who want validation. it's more a warning or reminder #there is NO shame in wanting validation. that is a VERY human thing to need. you are NOT a bad person for wanting validation #i just want to caution people to remember that giving undue power to other people to validate who you ARE can have consequences #but it isn't your fault if you sought validation and were hurt instead. that isn't your fault. you don't deserve to be hurt