#AND IT'S SAD AND RIDICULOUS AND CRINGE AND ADORABLE AND LOUD ANS STUPID AND STILK REFUSE AWKNOLEDGIND

[qcomicsy]

It's like, red and blue and blood and tears.

And potential and hurt and trust.

It's the way Wade looks at him and the way Peter laughs. It's on this little moments of free fall, its on the eternity before the trust. The repression and doubt.

And how justified they are on the feeling of it. It's how Wade deserves to love and be loved and how much giving Peter can be, how much little he permits himself to take.

And how easy Wade would give everything.

It's how Wade would never dare to ask and how Peter prohibited himself in considering.

It's on how loyal Deadpool is and the how terrified Spider-Man feels about this, because he knows it.

Deadpool is this big bruise shining and open for whoever wants to see. It's his "I am here, I'm alive despite every thing I'm alive I'm human. Im bleeding and my heart still beats".

And in his blood Peter sees his reflection.

Deadpool, loud and brave representing every single sin that Peter never dared to commit, never dared to even look at. Because if you look to the abyss the abyss looks back at you.

It's how Spider-Man is larger than life, having his name going from mouth to mouth, on journals and papers and the living proof that a symbol can be as much about justice and freedom and loved. And how Wade since the moment he was born begged and crawled, yearning for love, to be loved.

Is how maybe, maybe if life were kinder if he were stronger if he tried again, maybe a single time he could be everything Spider-Man represents, he could finally have every aspect that man's life.

And then could stand proud too. He could be larger than life, this time with something good to show to the world.

It's how in the end they're just distorted mirrored reflections of eachother. It's not the truth and it never will be.

Peter saw Wade, but he never actually looked at him and Wade adores Spider-Man but it's so so scared about facing Peter Parker.

Its on how Spider-Man took his mask and Wade run away.

How they have the same jokes, quips and smiles and fit so well together that everytime they see eachother they have to remove themselves from the situation before is too late. Too deep. Before the joke end and the thruth shows and oh god they're just two men, staring at each other, talking with each other, looking at eachother and they can't even bare to figure that thought.

It easy to be angry, it's easy to look away and it's easy to blame Spider-man supposed self righteousness and Deadpool well known chaos, than for a single time in their entire lives since the moment they met each other, they consider – even for a second – everything it is and everything it could be.

They can't.

They wish they coould.

So they fight, they joke, and eventually one of them leaves.

"There's no space for me in his life and there's no space for him in mine".

What a load of bullshit.

#sir they're ruining my life #somebody come get them I am catching feelings for mal-adjusted middle aged man agan #it's just *points at the weird swaggless cringe couple* THEY ARE MIRRORED DISTORTIONS OF EACHOTHER OFICCER #THEY KNOW AND THEY REFUSE TO CONFESSE MAN #AND DESPITE EVERYTHING THEY STILL FIT AS A GLOVE #AND IT'S SAD AND RIDICULOUS AND CRINGE AND ADORABLE AND LOUD ANS STUPID AND STILK REFUSE AWKNOLEDGIND #*ugly crying* #STUPID MIDDLE AGED COMIC BOOK MAN GOT ME AGAIN #spideypool #deadpool #spider-man #spiderman #peter parker #wade winston wilson #wade wilson #q rambles #q rants #writing #q fics #spideypool brain rot