#Can you tell I love Lynera? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

heuristicallyinclined · 4 years

Text

SPF Five Million or Whatever

Summary: Mspa Reader figures they need some sunlight and recruits a few friends to help them get it.

Rating: T for language

Notes: I haven't written any of the jades before and I really love them and tried my best to capture their dynamic. I really love imagining Mspa Reader's adventures between Friendsim and Pesterquest. I feel like the games were really just scratching the surface of their shenanigans.

(AO3)

You are pretty sure that people need about twenty minutes of sunlight a day to stay healthy.

Or at least that is what you think it is. You never really thought about it too much to be honest. Having spent a decent amount of time outside walking, you figured you were getting your daily dose in without much effort, and maybe you just didn’t realize how good you had it, not living on a planet that even passively was trying to kill you. Because right now, you know for a fact you’re getting the ideal amount of sunlight on Alternia, which in your personal experience is fucking ziltch.

You tried it once and learned pretty fast that what might leave you with a healthy glow on Earth, would leave you well done on Alternia, a disgusting state for any piece of meat to be in, let alone your body. So that was clearly an Earth exclusive recommendation.

Still, you think some sunlight would do you good.

Especially since you were starting to feel this constant exhaustion after a few months on Alternia. After ruling out your questionable diet and semi existent sleep schedule, you were left with the fact that you were likely getting a vitamin D deficiency.

Frankly, you have not survived your various trials and many tribulations here on Alternia to let rickets be what finally kills you. Absolutely not. No. You’re too proud to die in the lamest way possible on a planet with significantly more respectable and less preventable ways of dying.

This does mean you’ll have to face off with the Alternian sun, which really isn’t that much better on the lame death scale. Last time you got caught out during daylight, you got really lucky. You aren’t counting on a second time where a gorgeous cowgirl, alien Lassie, and a lot of dumb luck would happen to rescue you from your own poor life choices.

So this time, you were going to try to be smart about doing something this monumentally stupid. You were going to get water, a floppy hat, and some ice packs. Now you just had to not do this alone, especially when you knew someone who touted the merits of the buddy system.

Luckily, you also know a few people who could withstand the sun’s rays.

Finding out that jadeblood sun resistance was in fact a real thing and not just the latest in fucking with the local alien made this a whole lot easier and left you with a few options to consider. You figured Wanshi was too young to be kept up that late and that you’d rather not traumatize her if this went sideways. Bronya mentioned being busy with a new brood hatching and managing the herd of lusii they attracted to the caverns so that was a no go. Lanque would likely be otherwise occupied or at least claim to be and you’d rather him not see you like this if you could help it. That left you with Daraya, who you knew would be up and likely be down for some alien shenanigans. But most importantly, Lynera.

One massive check in her favor is she already had experience inconspicuously carrying your injured body through the caverns unnoticed by literally anyone else to a secondary location So discretion was clearly already a strong suit of hers. The context for how she even got that much experience in the first place is none of your business, especially now that you’re friends. And you’d say you two were actually pretty close after all the time you’ve spent hanging out with her in the caverns and going out on little cafe trips.

Really, she was the ideal candidate for this by every observable metric. Well, almost.

While she is loyal enough that you knew that she would help you hide a body if asked, she has also threatened enough people for perceived slights against you that she would very likely be the reason there was a corpse hanging around in the first place. So having Daraya be there too was probably a safe move.

Oh it’s all coming together now.

You were feeling really good about this. Your confidence in yourself, your friends, and your planning abilities carried you through two difficult conversations. One with a veneer of apathy trying to conceal some very real concern, the other incredibly loud and extremely worried, but you got through them and that’s what matters.

So here you are at the brooding caverns, tucked away inside the turn just before the mouth, clad in some cool guy shades from Cirava, a sun hat from Charun, some shorts from Remele, and a Xoloto brand tank top complete with strategic ripping that makes it basically impossible to wear anywhere in public without a layer underneath.

Your friends are right here with you. Lynera is alternating between pacing and fretting over the placement of your sun hat for the seventh time to really make sure your hair doesn’t ignite. You know it won’t and you told her it won’t, but you let her fuss. She just needs to do something with her hands to stay calm. You can at least let her have that with what you’re about to do. Daraya checks her palm husk again for the time as dawn steadily approaches. You take a deep breath in, psyching yourself up.

So you never actually figured out what the Alternian sun equivalent to twenty minutes of Earth sun is. But you think a minute should be enough to do it and not pass out. It feels about right. You have based this off of no math whatsoever, but you’ve done worse with less prep, so you’re not going to let some nerd shit stop you. Especially not now, when you hear Daraya sigh. You know that it’s show time.

You look at her to confirm as she pockets her device and you see some light begin to stretch into the cavern’s entrance. She looks at it too, frowning as it approaches.

“▲▲ try not to fry your pan ▼▼"

You give her a reassuring smile and run up through the mouth of the cave, and stop just past the entrance, arms up wide and outstretched, like you were doing the YMCA dance and lost rhythm just past the first letter, ready to receive that sunlight you so desperately craved. The sun hits your skin and there is a comfort in feeling’s its warmth after living in eternal night.

You really missed this.

...

Actually, you know what? No you don’t. Fuck this.

That “gentle warmth” quickly became a scorching blaze and to your credit, you made it a solid ten seconds under the full wrath of that relentless bitch they called a sun before you decided to quit while you were ahead and conscious. You dash back towards the entrance, uncomfortably aware of every step you take. Lynera stops nervously pacing and stiffens when you reenter the shade and runs towards you. Daraya is ready and quickly hands you a water bottle. You struggle to open the cap because of the condensation making the bottle slick and it exacerbates the painful tingle you’re feeling all over your hands. And your face. And your everything actually.

You continue struggling until you finally succeed in twisting the cap off, but your victory immediately proves to be a hollow one, as your tight grip on the bottle has water going everywhere.

God. Damn. It.

You’re vaguely cognisant of a screeching sound somewhere behind you, but you have more important concerns right now. By some absolute miracle, a decent amount of the water seems to have gotten on you and saturated your top, soothing the skin under it. You feel less like you’re on fire and more like you had marinated your entire body in icy-hot for a few hours before getting deep fried.

You’d like to believe that that is a much more manageable situation. Your skin can’t tell much of a difference though so you waste no time and pour the rest out all over your face like you were a champ who just scored the winning goal instead of a dipshit speedrunning skin cancer.

Daraya mercifully cracks a cold one with the boys and pours the contents of another water bottle on you like you were a plant she forgot to water. The cool sensation on your skin causes you to sigh in a relief that doesn’t last long, before you lose contact with the ground. Lynera has you thrown over her shoulder and starts quickly making her way back into the caverns to her respiteblock. The physical contact takes that previous painful tingle and absolutely fucking floors it, bringing you to a familiar world of pain that your ass was very content not revisiting. Daraya keeps pace behind the two of you with her arms crossed the face of someone who is totally not panicked.

You try to calm them, telling them you feel better already. Really, you mean it.

This just causes Lynera to speed up and Daraya to grimace down at you instead of giving you an actual response.

While, yes, you resent having flesh, you actually feel really awake right now.

Daraya narrows her eyes. “▲▲ you mean from the pain? ▼▼”

No. No. That's different. And way more familiar.

God. Despite looking like a freshly hatched octogenarian, Lynera can really book it.

She carries your limp, increasingly dizzy body with ease. You knew she was deceptively strong and fast first hand, based off of her being able to immediately able to knock you the fuck out and lug you back to her combination study block murder dungeon. Honestly, being able to do anything with an alien discreetly deserves commendation. Commendation up and out the wazoo.

You’re about to attempt to try to verbalize that thought, but just before the turn to get to Lynera's study block, she suddenly stops. She nervously glances between this hallway and another adjacent one one. Daraya almost bumps into her but stops herself just in time.

"▲▲▲ what are you doing? We said we were just going to put them in a spare recuperacoon ▼▼▼" Daraya whisper yells.

"They're a new color Daraya !!!" Lynera whisper yells to the point of negating the whisper part of the whisper yell and more just using a normal speaking volume with a hiss. “-they need !!! A medicull kit !!!”

Oh. You glance down at one of your dangling arms. That happened fast. In retrospect, you should have mentioned that was a thing that would potentially happen. How did you forget that?

“▲▲▲ and do what? A medicull kit could make them worse. We don’t know shit about aliens ▼▼▼”

“-!!! well how would you know all of their injuries were taken care of! that we didnt miss anything!”

“▲ they’re fine. We just, I don't fucking know? Rotate them in the slime? ▼”

“-like some sort of !!! rotisserie cluckbeast !!!” Lynera indignantly whisper shrieks.

"▲▲ No!▼▼" Daraya quickly defends. The way her eyes quickly glance to the side seems to imply that's kind of exactly what it's like.

Just like them rotisserie chickens.

The longer their arguing went on, the more uncomfortably aware you were getting about the fact that you had a body and Lynera's clothes felt like steel wool grating against your poor skin. That and describing what they were doing as “whisper arguing” was becoming more and more of a stretch as it went on and started to get louder. You were worried you were going to attract unwanted attention.

It is as soon as you have that thought, that a door opens, and you see an irritated Lanque groggily peek his head through to find the source of the commotion.

His face remains still at first, blinking tiredly as he takes in the fuckery and only opens the door wider when the other two turn at the sound of his door opening and he registers you slumped over Lynera’s shoulder with a single raised brow.

You smile and wave at him, despite how lightheaded her turn had you feeling, and Daraya quickly pulls your hand down and stands in front of you like there was nothing to see here. You let out a weak, “ow,” as she did, your flesh protesting at the touch. She glances back at you quickly, before exasperatedly turning to look back at Lanque with her arms crossed.

“▲▲ what? ▼▼”

He measuredly looks at the scene before him. Really taking in all of the bullshit before side eyeing Lynera.

“You threW the alien into broad daylight? EVen for you, that's crazy.” He almost sounds surprised, before smiling sweetly, “NoW Who’s going to tolerate you?”

Lynera sputters something, clearly offended, but Daraya cuts her off with a groan,

“▲ they literally need sunlight to live Lanque ▼”

His face twists. “Are they a fucking plant?”

“-no!!!" Lynera considers for a moment before yelling again just as loud. “-most likely not!!!”

He looks from your trio, to the small puddle of water forming under you, and glances back to the trail of water you apparently had dripping from you this whole time.

You know, you’re really starting to see the plant angle here.

“▲▲ look they just needed some stupid sunlight and we hung around to make sure they didn’t just get too cooked or whatever. What, are you going to tell Bronya on us? ▼▼" Daraya half mocks, half asks.

“No, of course not.” Lanque almost seems offended. “I don’t see any reason to inVolVe myself With you tWo Watching the alien give themselVes sun sickness.”

You ask no one in particular what sun sickness is.

“-can aliens get sun sickness???” Lynera asks with a newfound panic.

Lanque irritatedly replies, “HoW Would I knoW?”

You feel briefly dejected that no one answered. Until another thought crosses your mind. It wasn’t related to anything occurring at the moment, but it was weird enough that you don’t know how this was the first time you had ever really thought about it. Maybe the events of this morning were what it took for you to even be able consider this quandary.

Why do they say troll before a name? Like troll Will Smith? Doesn’t that imply there is another kind of WIll Smith? Like if they’re all trolls, why say troll? Oh shit, is that why they do it? Did you tell them about human Will Smith or would that be like human Whillh Smithh? Human Willhh Smyyth?

You rack your mind for other ways of making Will Smith a valid troll name, concentration evident on your face.

Lanque looks at you like you’re an idiot. “What the fuck are you talking about? You're just repeating the same name.”

The spelling? You narrow your eyes as you consider the spelling. It is the clearest thing in the world right now to you. It’s spelled different Lanque.

“I can’t hear how it’s spelled.”

Daraya’s eyes widen. "▲▲ They fried their fucking pan ▼▼ "

You still don’t know what sun sickness is, but you strongly suspect you may have it, especially since most of what happened afterwards was kind of a blur.

What you think you can remember is the sound of someone coming. Quick, determined footsteps that you couldn’t recognize, but Lynera clearly could as she stiffened first. She maybe said something about Bronya doing a curfew round? You think? Either way, it had everyone else on immediate edge and was enough for Lanque to decide this wasn’t worth staying awake for. He made a final comment and you heard a door shut, leaving your trio behind.

Daraya and Lynera exchanged words, finally remembering the “whisper” part of whisper yelling. They came to an agreement of some sort with Lynera nodding and heading to her studyblock and Daraya going off in the direction of what was probably Bronya.

Mentally, you are pressing F to pay your respects. Physically though, you register your orientation rapidly shifting. While you weren’t crazy about your position over Lynera's shoulder, what with her sweater vest grating against your torso and all, it turns out you enjoyed being moved out of it even less. The blood running away from your head had you feeling woozy in a whole new way.

To her credit, Lynera did not just immediately dunk you into the recuperacoon a la Space Jam like you’re sure she wanted to. She instead carefully lets you sink into it with a gentleness that starkly contrasted her worry. Normally, you would say that being put into a vat of slime is not an experience you would be looking forward to. Right now though, you’re loving it. It is an absolute godsend as it acts a cool balm against your skin.

Lynera continues and gingerly removes your shades and places them on an end table next to your sunhat. You were about to thank her and let her know she was in fact “a real one,” but you got cut off by her grabbing a handful of slime and smearing it on your face.

You sputter and instinctively try to move away, but you’re no match for her. She’s dealt with fussy grubs with sharp teeth for way too long to actually be deterred by your feeble efforts to resist. You don’t know how you’d rate the experience between, “children haphazardly covering you in slick grease paint” to “alien clay mask ensuring you don’t have enough skin to even entertain having clogged pores,” but you aren’t in a position to be opposed to it. It actually feels kinda nice when it’s in a smooth, even layer and not a huge fucking dollop on your face.

When she’s done, she wipes her hands while saying something to you. You don’t really register it, so you just kinda smile and nod. It’s your usual go to when you aren’t quite sure what is happening around you and it hasn’t led you too astray in the very many times you’ve done it. You’ll just ask her what she said in the evening.

Lynera seems pleased and starts moving to turn off the lights. Before she does, you thank her. She smiles at you, the corners of her eyes crinkling, and glances back at you as she goes, leaving you feeling warm inside and out for two extremely different reasons.

You settle down, trying to get cozy. You're not going to pretend you know much about sopor slime. You assumed it comes from a plant and haven't tried to confirm that little theory of yours because you need to believe that for your own sake. It's plant goo. From some kind of alien aloe vera or something. An extremely fleshy plant just ripe with goo for the taking. If you ever learn otherwise, no you didn't.

After you wake up and wipe off the slime, you find that you’ve healed surprisingly quickly. You’re still very tender to the touch, you find that out real fast, but your skin looks a lot less irritated than when you last saw it. This bit of good news and vitamin d that you assume you now have coursing through your veins that hopefully was not mostly used up on healing your skin, puts a little pep in your step as you get ready for the night. Before you exit the caverns, you feel a pang of hunger.

You can practically hear Bronya reminding you how breakfast is the most important meal of the day, so you walk into the meal block, figuring that no one would mind too much if you grabbed a breakfast bar or two before you left. Maybe you’ll even get lucky and find the ones that kind of taste like peanut butter and are crunchy for reasons you’d rather not identify. You aren’t alone when you enter. Lanque is there, sitting at a table. He looks up from his palm husk and eyes you.

“Did you change color?”

Yeah. Humans being exposed to sunlight makes them create a protective pigment so they're more able to be exposed to the sun.

“I’m fascinated.” he says, anything but. “So you're going to turn jade?”

No, more of a slightly darker version of what you are now.

He hums, now totally disinterested and looking back down at his chittr feed. Guess the limits of your rainbowdrinker like attributes have worn off on him.

Anyways, this just means that this will be easier next time you go out during the day.

That statement gives him pause. Lanque looks up from his palm husk, looking out before glancing at you dubiously.

"Next time?"

#hiveswap #hiveswap friendsim #Lynera Skalbi #Daraya Jonjet #Lanque Bombyx #Mspa Reader #This is just me having fun and getting real stupid enjoy #Can you tell I love Lynera?

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iapislazuli · 3 years

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please tell me ur headcanons for how the jadebloods eat. who has weird food habits and what are they. who cooks and who ACTUALLY cooks well. who is helpless etc etc etc. i love hearing what u say about sibling dynamics w jadebloods

OH IVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS A LOT. I GOT OFF ON A TANGENT HERE BUT BEAR WITH ME... i think the jade hive in general was originally the dolorosa’s hive but its been added onto over the years (everything about it feels very patchwork and well-worn, theres an enormous clash in interior design and architecture because so many different matrons added onto it with their own tastes)

WHAT THIS MEANS IS. there’s two kitchens. one’s the original, “personal” type kitchen and one’s a bigger school cafeteria-style kitchen. if you want food thats actually good and hasnt been sitting under a heat lamp and probably been touched by a few 8 year olds you gotta make it yourself.

Bronya’s a good cook, but she rarely has the time to make anything substantial. she likes to eat healthy and organic stuff and genuinely likes it. Lynera CAN cook but she likes raw steak. she always copies whatever bronya’s eating that day, though. Lanque hates healthy and organic food but eats it because “his body is a temple” or whatever. hes got secret stashes of junk food though. daraya and wanshi are both really really picky. daraya likes their food a LITTLE spicy. but not so spicy that it hurts. just like a LITTLE BIT. mostly the cheese. theyre lactose intolerant but god they only eat things with cheese. wanshi goes ballistic over happy meal mcnuggets and always wants the birthday cake pancake from ihop but bronya won’t let her get it because it’s too sugary. basically like, she loves sweet and sugary stuff because shes 11 and it doesnt wreck her digestive system. She also needs the crusts cut off her sandwhiches because she hates the crusts. daraya and wanshi raid lanque’s junk food stash because bronya and lynera never buy any good snacks

#dia answers #daraya needs a bag of snack mix on speed dial or they will become unwell and start massacring the customers #ghostrally

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skeletorific · 4 years

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(Sorry if it’s already been asked)what’s your interpretation/view of the quadrants? What in your mind makes an healthy and unhealthy quadrantship?

*distant drumbeat* I’ve been WAITING for this one! Turn it up!!!!

So, a few general notes about quadrants before getting into a breakdown. First, I don’t think there’s a hard and fast definition of what makes, say, a healthy kismessitude, any more than there’s a hard and fast definition of a healthy human relationship. What would be toxic and terrible for one couple may be exactly what keeps a different relationship together. Meowrails is very different from pale Vrisrezi, because Equius and Nepeta are different people with different wants and needs in a relationship than Vriska and Terezi. As with all bonds, it’s important to look at a broader trend of behavior and the individual mental health levels before you can say “this is unhealthy”. I DO think there are certain things to watch out for, but ultimately I probably have ships in that quadrant that may violate one or more of those “no-nos” just because of how those characters bounce off each other.

Second, I think there’s more fluidity in quadrants than the fandom typically allows for, because human relationships are also by their nature fluid. We’ve all seen a set of best friends who act like a couple even if they aren’t romantically interested, and we’ve seen couples who bicker and squabble despite being deeply in love. How you choose to identify your relationship is ultimately nobody’s business but your own, even if red love for you looks like pale love to someone else. Alternian troll culture is romance obsessed and this can lend itself to an obsession with defining the attraction, but this doesn’t mean that’s necessarily how it HAS to be.

Finally, I’ll be listing ALL confirmed canon examples of each quadrant to provide a context for what I’m referencing. This should not be taken as necessary endorsement for any of these ships, or even that I think they were a “good example”, simply that how they chose to identify influenced my own definition of these quadrants. I will also be leaving out a lot of ships that would seem to fit a particular quadrant (noteably Rosemary and Arasol) because their own status is complicated in-text (Rose explicitly refers to wanting to be in all of Kanaya’s quadrants and their relationship has tended explicitly pitch at points, Sollux is referred to as Aradia’s “boyfriend” and yet there is apparently no issue between either of them when his flush quadrant becomes occupied)

With that, let’s dig in

Matespritship:

Successful/Actually Date(d) Examples: Dad/Mom, Latula/Mituna, Meulin/Kurloz, Aranea/Porrim, Mindfang/Summoner, Meenah/Vriska, Sollux/Feferi, Konyyl/Azdaja (currently vacillating), Stelsa/Tyzias

Crushes (unrequited, vacillating, or thwarted): Eridan/Feferi, Kanaya/Vriska, Nepeta/Karkat, Equius/Aradia, Tavros/Jade, Gamzee/Tavros, Sollux/Gamzee, Jack/PM, Lynera/Bronya

What it means to me: Matespritship tends to be an opt-out quadrant for a lot of people, I think. Most seem to stop reading at “closely analogous to human conceptions of romance” and turn off their brains. However, as with all things troll culture, I think there’s more to it the deeper you go, especially considering the fact that your moirail is expected to do a LOT of what we would consider standard s/o stuff: caretaking, comfort, intimate knowledge, closeness. I absolutely refuse to buy that the only thing distinguishing the two is that matesprits have sex, especially since that stumble into some VERY UNCOMFORTABLE territory in regards to troll asexuality. So then, if it’s not that, then what is it?

Ultimately I keep coming back to the idea of passion. Your matesprit I think is the person who you genuinely see in the best possible light. Unusual for Alternian society, you’re unable to ignore the depths of your admiration of them, or to let their flaws filter into your perception. Moiraillegiance is about total honesty and unflinching recognition, but matespritship to me is about that kind of fairy tale passion. Its a person who, even if you know on an intellectual level they are not perfect, that you genuinely have a harder time seeing the darker side of because you are so consumed by this passion for what you see in them, your unfiltered awe and appreciation for who they are.

Additionally, I see matespritship as on some level inherently possessive. You not only admire that person, but you fundamentally crave their attention in a way that is probably a bit on the selfish side. Its not enough to want good for them, it has to be good alongside you. This is typically where it’s more prone to flipping caliginous.

Warning signs: Matespritships seemed to vacillate pitch FREQUENTLY on Alternia. This is not necessarily a sign that something is wrong. As Karkat says, it’s often a matter of communication and timing. However, it does have the potential to explode in everyone’s face if not carefully managed, in no small part due to the passionate emotions involved. Some things that tend to go bad fast:

-Admiration is key to an effective matespritship, but pedestalling your flushed partner too much can be dangerous. Once the flaws do become apparent (as they will in any relationship) they can become increasingly hard to ignore, and that can be SHATTERING if you don’t prepare.

-Especially on Alternia, matesprits are the quadrant I see as most likely to neglect the communication aspect of their relationship. Safety isn’t a factor for them like it is for more caliginous quadrants, and the expectation is usually that feelings jams are for moirails. Especially for younger trolls, there’s an idea that we’re in love and thus should just know what the other person needs/wants. If you don’t pick up on it, then maybe we aren’t meant to be. This is a trap. ALL relationships need communication in order to function on a day to day basis. Opening up to your matesprit about something that’s bothering you isn’t a sign of fading passion, but of maturity and your own changing needs.

-Despite a fondness for fate pairings I think matespritships are usually expected to fade out, in no small part because they’re founded on a level of passion that can be hard to keep up long-term. This is actually fine. Not all relationships are meant to last eternally. However, if you know your matesprit is a person you want in your life long-term, part of that is learning how to cope with periods of low passion. Its normal to not always feel an all-consuming desire to keep your matesprit in arms reach. It’s normal to need space. What’s important is that YOU know that you still love them, and that they have the confidence to know that’s true even when you can’t always express it.

Moirallegiance

Successful/Actually Date(d) Examples: Kanaya/Vriska, Eridan/Feferi, Gamzee/Karkat, Nepeta/Equius, Kurloz/Mituna, Meulin/Horuss, Terezi/Vriska, Kuprum/Folykl, MSPAR/Polypa, Xefros/Dammek

Crushes (unrequited, vacillating, or thwarted): Eridan/Karkat, MSPAR/Chixie, MSPAR/Stelsa, Tegiri/Polypa

What it means to me: To start out with, I haaaaaaaate hate hate the perception that moirails are just BFFs. To me, there’s too much evidence to suggest otherwise, not the least of which being that after Feferi ends their moirallegiance she tells Eridan she still wants to be friends with him. How many of you break up with your best friend and then tell them you can still be friends after?

To me, moirallegiance on Alternia is as much a coping mechanism at it is a romantic entanglement. In a society where there’s no such thing as therapy, your moirail ideally functions as a release valve for you, to help you exercise softer feelings in a safe, sanctioned environment. Two things are key in that dynamic: honesty, and selflessness.

There’s no pretense in a moirallegiance, but an unflinching embrace. The successful moirails we’ve seen (Meowrails, KupFol, arguably GamKar) have always been rooted in banter that may come off as pitch at first glance. This is partly due to general Alternian socialization practice, but I think it also stems from the fact that pale love is founded in knowing every inch of your partner. You know what they are, body and soul, the flaws and the highlights, and while you do not uncritically accept it like a matesprit might, some part of you fundamentally identifies with. Your moirail is that person who you feel like you’ve known for years after talking for a few hours, because something about how they’re wired clicks with you in a way most don’t. As such, there’s less need for posturing. A feelings jam is one of the few places on Alternia where you are allowed to admit to vulnerability, to fear, to frustration, because you know that the other person will have your back unquestioningly without letting you get away with bullshit.

This mutual support stems from the other half of pale love: the desire to see the other person flourish, no matter what. If the matesprit wants you to be happy at their side, the moirail wants you to flourish even if they do not stand to benefit. You experience your moirail’s success like it was your own, and want as good for them or better than you want for yourself.

Some warning signs:

-Burnout. We see this in most clearly in Eridan and Feferi’s case (and a bit in Gamzee and Karkat’s case), but its a genuine risk in moirallegiance. The caretaking HAS to go both ways or the relationship is doomed to fail. More often than not, burnout indicates a failure within the relationship. Your moirail has not been caring for you to the degree you need, and quite possibly you have not been communicating HOW you would like that behavior to change. As I said, honesty is essential, and things ideally should never reach the point of burnout because you are in constant complete openness with your moirail about how you need taking care of.

-Fucked expectations. Romance is a dominating subject on Alternia, for obvious reasons, and one of the biggest hits a moirallegiance can take is a person questioning too far into pale desire until they mistake it for something else. The two are very close, but they are not exactly the same thing and often times the relationship can be sunk by one person getting in their head about that intimacy until they try to make it something it isn’t. Moiraillegiance is not a stepping stone for matesprit or kismesis, and most importantly it is not a consolation prize quadrant. You should never “settle” for moirail, or pale date someone who will accept you as a moirail only if they can’t get you as anything else. You need to want a moirail for a moirails sake, or its just a crush with extra levels of fuckery and expected free therapy.

Kismessitude

Successful/Actually Date(d) Examples: Spades Slick/Sn0wman, Jack Noir/Black Queen, Eridan/Vriska (now broken up), Karkat/Karkat, Mindfang/Dualscar, Terezi/Gamzee, Tagora/Galekh, Bronya/Elwurd.

Crushes (unrequited, thwarted, vacillating): Eridan/Rose, Vriska/Tavros, Karkat/John, Gamzee/Dave, Sollux/Gamzee, Eridan/Sollux, PM/Bec Noir, Terezi/Vriska, John/Terezi, Konyyl/Skylla, Daraya/Lynera

What it means to me:

I want to structure this as a dismantling of two very common misconceptions I see for this quadrant. One, kismesis is NOT the inherent abuse quadrant. This I believe is working with a faulty definition of what abuse is. Abuse is not simply being mean or engaging in a physical manner with somebody. As has become something of a mantra for this essay, its about expectations. Abuse requires someone to be taking advantage, exploiting a particular vulnerability (or creating it if none inherently exists). What makes a relationship abusive is a situation where someone you SHOULD be able to trust or care for uses those expectations to hurt you, either for personal gain or simply to make themselves feel better. A kismesis is not that, because a healthy kismesis goes in with the expectation of rivalry. For some kismeses, this looks like basic sniping, insults, and jabs. For others, it looks like actual fighting. In either case, its the difference between a boxing match and assault. As long as the rules are being respected, both parties are consented, and someone is checking in to ensure that no one is hurting themselves (sometimes your partner, sometimes your moirail, sometimes your auspitice), then there is nothing inherently wrong with having a circumstance in which you are allowed to work through some nastier feelings without fear of consequence or hurting someone who can’t take it.

The second misconception: kismesis is not just a relationship with some bitchier dialogue. As we’ve seen, being a little bit rude is not restricted to pitch feelings. We have many examples of it in relationships that would be considered unequivocally red or pale on Alternia (KupFol, MeenVris). I go back to the Karkat dialogue constantly. Your kismesis is not just a person you make fun of, but something closer to your true rival (in the shonen anime sense). Its a person who you see so much good (or potential for good in), but who is brought down by some kind of fatal flaw that just grates at you. And so, you fixate on the idea of pushing them out of that flaw, through whatever means necessary.

Its from this fatal flaw that I believe the benefits of kismesis come out. Your kismesis, like your matesprit, has intense passion for you, but doesn’t idealize you. In fact, at points your kismesis may be incredibly aware of the WORST possible version of you. What distinguishes it from platonic hate, though, is the fact that you at your worst doesn’t make them flinch. It makes them want to provoke you, to see how you can change. Kismeses sharpen each other, which is something that rarely feels good but is so often necessary. You should never let your kismesis sit back too far on their laurels, because it is your job to be consciously aware of their faults and call them out on it.

Additionally, while the hatefucking aspect is often overestimated, I think its not surprising that passion in these kinds of relationships tend to get intense, which is part of why it so often requires some kind of ashen intervention. Once harnessed, though, that passion can be turned to powerful ends for both yourselves and the world around you.

Some things to watch out for (unsurprisingly there’s a LOT for this one but I’ve distilled it into two broad ones because this thing will be long enough):

Power imbalance: As I said, kismesis is not inherently abusive. However, it DECIDEDLY has the potential to become so, in particular in a society like Alternia where the power strafes are often so significant. This is particularly the case in pitch relationships involving a highblood and a lowblood, especially when the highblood is “steering the ship”. Vriska/Tavros is a good example. If summarized, her feelings for Tavros pre-Sgrub are very straightforward and healthy pitch ones. She admires his potential and envies his kinder relationships while despising his indecisiveness. All fine enough groundwork. However, three factors collaborate to make it a hot disaster: Tavros’s disinterest in her (meaning the pitch advances are unwelcome and in some real sense nonconsensual), Vriska’s own lack of restraint (meaning she takes things too far even for a kismesis), and the inherent caste imbalance (meaning Tavros has no meaningful way of fighting back and nothing in Vriska’s rearing has taught her to care if a lowblood gets hurt by her actions). This isn’t to say a highblood-lowblood (or any humanly imbalanced relationship) can NEVER work, but it requires both parties to put the work in to even the playing field. The highblood needs to actively show restraint, both physically and situationally. This is also where an auspitice generally comes in handy, ensuring things never get to a point where the action becomes one-sided.

Misdirected Rage: As I said, kismessitude is a Space, much like moiraillegiance, that gives you the opportunity to work through some less-than-palatable emotions. Using a pitch date as a way to burn off stress is not inherently invalid; in fact, its often expected and as long as your partner is willing can be one of the better ways to cope with something without having to address it directly. However, this CANNOT be built into the foundation of the relationship. Your kismesis is not a punching bag, but their own person, and the focus always needs to eventually return to that. You cannot effectively sharpen someone else if your anger is never about them, and it is ultimately unfair to constantly ask someone else to consistently bear the brunt of your bad days. This is (debatably) where pitch Gamrezi went wrong. Ultimately that kismesis was never really about each other, but about both of them projecting their self-loathing onto the other person when they were both at incredibly low place, thus making their anger unproductive and meaningless for both of them. As such, any kind of empathy was impossible and they were not able to self-regulate.

Auspiticism

Succesful/Actually Date(d): Vriska/Kanaya/Tavros, Karkat/Jade/Karkat, Spades Slick/Doc Scratch/Sn0wman, Liv Tyler/Courtyard Droll/Wizardly Vassal, PM/Jade/Bec Noir, Kanaya/Vriska/Rose

Crushes (unrequited, thwarted, vacillating): Vriska/Kanaya/Eridan, Gamzee/Rose/Terezi (look I know this one is practically canon but Rose kind of implies she never really used those auspiticism lessons), Rose/Kanaya/Horrorterrors, Eridan/Feferi/Sollux, Gamzee/Kanaya/Karkat, Dave/Kanaya/Karkat, Konyyl/MSPA Reader/Azdaja.

What it means to me: Ahh the bastard child of quadrants. I’ve got a lot of unpopular opinions on auspiticism (most notably that Kanaya isn’t actually that good at it), but let’s start with defining some things. I believe there are two kinds of auspitices.

One is the “breakup” auspitice. This is the version described in the infamous romance pages of Homestuck. This version is meant to prevent a black romance from breaking out where one shouldn’t occur, either because one or both parties already has a kismesis or because there is some other mitigating factor that means neither can afford to get bogged down in this crush. A breakup auspitice should ideally be a figure that both parties trust, even in the midst of heated feelings. They should also have the strength of will to continually interfere, and a clear enough head to cut to the root of the issue. Its a thankless task, often, but a very vital one, and most importantly, short-lived. This auspitice’s job only lasts as long as the feelings last. Once both parties have had the chance to cool down (or the circumstances creating the rivalry are at an end), their job is considered over.

The other kind is the version that we arguably see more of in canon, what I call the Third Leaf. This is less an intercessary party and more the third member of a particularly tempestuous kismesis, who will act to ensure the other two leaves don’t cause serious harm to themselves or each other. This relationship is far more long-term, and thus has more requirements. To me, your auspitice is someone who has pale potential with both you AND your kismesis. They know and care about you both on a very deep level, to the point that they are willing to put themselves in the middle of your bullshit very consistently. This means that you trust them enough to call it quits even in the heat of your anger, and you also believe what they tell you about your own pitch partner when their actions need greater contextualization to keep things on the level. This task is often equally challenging, but (hopefully) not as thankless or as pragmatic.

I’ve previously referred to the auspitice as a personified safeword, and I believe that’s very emblematic of the Third Leaf. Even healthy kismeses may reach a point where one needs a day off, or something hits in the wrong way. In a rivalry, though, admitting that isn’t necessarily easy, as its both breaking kayfabe and has the potential to read as more weakness that needs to be excised (”it hurts because its working”). The auspitice is privileged to go between and be believed every time. If your auspitice says its a no go then you better have a pretty damn good reason to ignore them. For some kismeses, overriding the auspitice is grounds to break up once and for all.

Some warning signs:

Burnout: As is the case with the previously discussed concilliatory quadrant, caretaking can be exhausting. This is especially the case in auspiticism, where the care is often expected to be very one sided, and usually involves dealing with a lot of vitriol, anger, and even physical violence. Obviously its more prevalent in Third Leaf dynamics, but even breakup auspitices can reach a breaking point if they’re not careful. Its important as the ashenmate to understand your own limits. For better or for worse, the focus will not be on you. If you are reaching a low point, then you need to be vocal about this with your other two leaves, or disaster is almost inevitable. The trade-off for this is that (according to my headcanons at least), your ashenmates are expected to drop everything to care for you if you need it. The kismesis will not be safe to proceed until you are back in fighting shape, and as such a truce is declared until they have both done “aftercare” of a sort for you. What this looks like is different for every auspiticism. For some, its alone time. For others, its blanket burritos, movies, and forehead kisses. No matter what, though its IMPERATIVE that you find a method that works for you, because the relationship crumbles without self-care.

Doormatting: As I said, auspiticism is a concilliatory quadrant. As such, there can be a tendency to over-forgive or overwork, especially if your other two leaves have stronger personalities. In particular, ausptices who are closer with one leaf over the other need to be vigilant for favoritism or bowing down. It is your job to contextualize the actions of your ashenmates. It is not your job to do apologetics for them or atone for their actions. Hold them all accountable. They need to be putting in at least as much work as you do to make their relationship work and not just offset the emotional repair to you.

Controlling: The inverse of this is the power-tripping auspitice. This seems unlikely, but its more of a threat than one might think, in my view. Because of the trust auspitices command by virtue of their position and their relationship with the other two leaves, their word is in some sense law. This can be addictive to some people, and lead to an abuse of power that can be just as toxic as in any other quadrant. It can look like scolding your ashenmates far too much, placing yourself at the center of their issues, or even punishing them for annoying you when what they’re doing is perfectly acceptable within the context of a kismessitude. As I said, self-care is important for an auspitice, but selflessness needs to be at the core of concilliatory dynamics. You are here because you genuinely want good for the people you are mediating for. If the relationship has become all about you, then something has gone horribly wrong. Avoid the urge to power trip just because the role is sometimes a Lot.

#Anonymous #homestuck #quadrants #matesprit #matespritship #kismesis #kismessitude #moirail #moiraillegiance #auspiticism #auspitice #headcanon #long post

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multiedits · 4 years

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Don't swear at us if you don't like the result, it's not always easy, we can do something different for you if you want

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riverboundao3ff · 4 years

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Riverbound, Chapter 17

All in all, Lanque’s a whole lot calmer about the whole thing than you thought he’d be, which makes you feel better about going to him right away instead of Daraya. Of course you love Daraya, but knowing the kid she’d probably run off to start a fight with Bronya, Lynera, and any other poor bastard who gets in her way.

“I want to believe Bronya’s doing this because she thinks she’s in the right, but I just can’t… augh! I just… can’t believe she’d ask me to do something like that.” You conclude your messy rant by flopping down on the carpet. There’s a dull ache in your skull from either exhaustion or anxiety, possibly both.

Lanque’s looking down at you from the loveseat in the corner like the universe’s most judgemental therapist, sprawled across the whole thing with his gangly self. “You haven’t known her nearly as long as I have. You heard me say once that she’s the craziest bitch in the whole cloister. I meant it.”

You want to argue with him; Bronya isn’t crazy, just a control freak, but that’s gonna have to be a discussion for another time. “You’re not surprised at all by this? Not even a little?”

“Not surprised. Just… disappointed.”

“What, does she make you to sleep at certain times and check your palmhusk, too?” you joke.

“Not anymore, she doesn’t. She learned her lesson after I filled my whole camera roll with the spiciest nudes you can imagine.”

You try not to imagine anything of the sort and fail miserably. Your last brain cell hangs on for dear life. “So, uh… w-what should I tell her the next time we go out?”

“Tell her that I’ve been taking Daraya to a slam poetry club. We’ve actually done poetry in the past, so it’s not like you’ll be lying,” he says with a smirk. “You should come sometime. Talk to people about all sorts of controversial alien opinions. Maybe throw in some rhymes while you’re at it.”

“Alright,” you agree.

“... Darling?”

“Yes, babe?”

“Don’t breathe a word of this to Daraya. She’s stressed out enough as it is.”

“Of course not.”

“Good.”

:::

The next night you spend with Polypa, vandalizing stuff with the Heiress’s face on it and even setting a billboard on fire. It’s a lot of fun, but between vandalizations you can’t stop yourself from thinking about the girl herself. From what you can tell she’d be around seventeen in human years, which meant she’d soon have to challenge the Empress, as all the Heiresses before her did.

Some teenagers like to play video games, some like to sing or dance or do sports; you even know a few who live all by themselves on an island in the middle of the ocean who can shoot guns better than most military personnel. But not Trizza Tethis. No, she’ll be off to duel for the throne… and her life.

In your hearts of hearts you know that Tethis is a monster. There’s no doubt about it. But that doesn’t change the fact that she’s still just a kid, a kid who is going to be murdered soon for the crime of reaching adulthood.

It makes your heart hurt just thinking about that, and all of the other girls that came before her, and if this rebellion goes to shit all the girls who will come after her.

“Hey, Polypa?” you ask.

“Yeah?” She’s hanging upside-down on some broken piping while spraying THE REVOLUTION IS HERE on the side of a post office. You’re being a good moirail and keeping watch for anybody who might see her, even though it’s dark out and you can’t see much past the street lights lining the sidewalk. For some reason she refuses to tell you, she’s been in a mood ever since she came back from Tegiri’s, but you’re patient. You can wait for her.

“Do you ever wonder if Trizza might have been a good person if Alternia wasn’t the way it is?”

Polypa stops what she’s doing and stares down at you. “Honestly? I don’t really care how she might have turned out if things were different. All the things I’ve seen her do, the shit I’ve heard her say on social media… I just can’t bring myself to believe anything other than she’s one of the most horrible Heiresses Alternia’s ever had and that she deserves to die. Slowly and painfully, that is. And then she deserves to be forgotten.”

“That’s fair,” you tell her. “I dunno, I just kept thinking about how she’s supposed to go off and duel the Empress soon, and that she’s definitely not gonna win, because none of the fuschias who went up against her ever did.”

“... Does that make you sad?”

“It makes me sad that a kid is going to die, yes.”

She huffs. “Save your sympathy. She doesn’t deserve it.”

“Can trolls control who they sympathize with?”

“Of course we can. Can’t humans?”

You laugh. “No. Or at least I can’t. Empathy’s a blessing and a curse.”

Polypa chucks her spray-paint can into the nearby dumpster. “Empathy? Isn’t that like, feeling what other people are feeling? I thought that was just a myth.”

“Some humans can feel the emotions of others. I’ve always been able to.”

“That sucks.”

“Again, it’s a blessing and a curse.”

Polypa shudders, flips upright, and then drops down to the concrete. “If you say so. C’mon, let’s scram.”

You scram, or at least you try to before somebody bumps into you hard enough to nearly knock you over.

“Watch it!” Polypa hisses from somewhere behind you.

You look up at a boft looking (buff plus soft) rustblood guy, who flinches back when he accidentally looks you in the eye. “Sorry! Sorry. Bye.”

He shuffles off down the street, shoulders hunched in like he’s trying to make himself as small as possible even though he’s easily the biggest rust you’ve ever seen. Huh.

“Well, that was weird,” you say, and then you feel something crinkle in the hood of your jacket. Cautiously, you reach up and grab it, hoping that he didn’t just put a bomb on you or something. You aren’t that worried about dying, because you know your immortal ass is coming right on back, but if Polypa’s in the blast zone--

“It’s a piece of paper,” she says.

“Oh, yay. I thought it might be a bomb.”

“Definitely not a bomb.”

The paper’s been folded several times, so you smooth it out and read the letters that have been cut out and glued out in a note, like some kind of Nancy Drew shit.

“What the…” You read the message, and then you read it again, once, twice, thrice, four times before Polypa starts swatting at you and grabbing for the paper. You hand it over and stare out across the street.

You are not alone. Tomorrow at midnight.

“I’m texting the others,” Polypa mutters, shoving the paper into her pocket and whipping out her palmhusk.

“There’s more of us,” you whisper. “That’s what it means, right? We’re not the only faction out there fighting for-!”

“I don’t know, I don’t know, let’s not believe anything that some stranger wrote down on a piece of paper and shoved into your hoodie--”

“But he came to me, Polypa--”

“Hey!”

Both of you turn around to see some cerulean girl you don’t know storming across the street to you. “The fuck you think you gutterbloods are doing, huh?”

“The revolution is here, bitch,” you tell her, and you grab Polypa’s sleeve and zap away.

Polypa does not hesitate to smack you upside the head the second you two appear on the roof of some building downtown. “The hell was that? She just saw an alien and an oliveblood teleport out of an alley with fresh graffiti on the post office!”

“Who’s gonna believe her?” you snort.

“She’s a cerulean, she’ll make somebody believe her.”

“Dude. Chill. We still have time before things get crazy.”

“Apparently not! Tomorrow at midnight--”

“I know! Isn’t it great? What if it’s like, a big post on Chittr, or a public service announcement from God knows where saying that it’s time for bigots to start shitting their pants, because the revolution is here and it is sexy!”

“Augh!” Polypa throws up her hands. You start to get a little concerned. “Aren’t you scared? Like, at all? We could all die tomorrow and you’re just… totally fine! You disappear for half a sweep and come back ready to lead a revolution!”

Alright, it’s time to bring out the big guns. Slowly, so she has time to pull away if she wants, you step forward and reach up to caress her cheek.

The effect is instantaneous. She visibly loosens up from horns to toes, leaning forward into the contact with a low chirrup rising up from deep in her throat. If you were a troll, that sound would have probably made you pale-horny to the max, but you’re human so all you do is just stand up on your tippy-toes to press your foreheads together. You imagine pulling away all of her fear and stress and releasing it into the open sky, never to be seen again.

“We’re not going to die,” you tell her. “We’re just not. And if we were, I’d tell you, because dying isn’t that bad. Doesn’t even hurt, really.”

“... You’ve been dead before?”

“Yeah. Feels like the best fucking nap you’ve ever taken.”

She snorts hard enough for you to feel her breath across your face. “Only you would say something like that and be completely unbothered.”

“That’s just how it be sometimes,” you say, because joking about your trauma and having anxiety are basically your only two personality traits nowadays.

“I’ll write that down for the pile,” she says, because she’s always been able to see right through you, even when you can’t see yourself. “Which we’re going back to an abandoned apartment building to do once I yeet this glass bottle into that window over there.”

She picks up the broken glass bottle at your feet and proceeds to do just that. It sails through the air with all the majesty of an eagle and crashes through somebody’s office window. You know enough about troll romance by now to be a little scandalized by how forward she’s being, but you both know it’s out of necessity. Troll language is far from just verbal-- it’s flattened ears or bared fangs or dilated pupils. It’s hissing and chirping and growling and all sorts of sounds you don’t even know the names for, and you can’t even hear most of them because they’re either too low or too high a pitch for your human ears to catch.

“Hot damn, wildcat. You gonna take me out to dinner before you throw me down on somebody’s abandoned loungeplank?” you tease. Her face lights up in green, and you grin in satisfaction as she splutters something about saving it for the respiteblock.

You’re about to cook up something truly slutty to say when her palmhusk vibrates. Polypa reads it and snorts. “Aaaannnddd Daraya is losing her mind, Tagora says it’s a trap, Tyzias wants to know what the rustblood looked like, Stelsa is in agreement with Tagora, Lanque is asking how the hell it could be a trap when the rustblood didn’t even ask you to meet him anywhere, and Mallek is telling everybody to shut up so he can take a nap. Konyyl and Azdaja haven’t responded yet. I bet they’re making out in a back alley somewhere. Oh, Tagora is telling Lanque to shut his Troll Twilight-looking ass up before he fines him for wasting the rebellion’s time… and Tyzias just sent a bunch of hysterical laughing emojis.”

“I love my friends,” you say.

“You sound like you’re trying to convince yourself.”

“I’m gonna get Mallek to hack the server so whenever people start arguing over stupid stuff a bot starts spamming the chat with gifs of fighting purrbeasts.”

“Do group chats have servers?”

“I have no idea. Come on, I’m fucking freezing up here.”

:::

Your memories of growing up on Earth are fuzzy at best. You have no idea if it’s from Scratch, or Ultimate Dirk, or hell, maybe it’s just regular old brain damage, but one of the few things you can vividly remember is when your grandma died.

You can’t remember her name, but you can easily recall her eternally-smiling face, that smile that always reached her eyes-- hazel, like yours. She’s the one who taught you how to braid your hair, wing your eyeliner, ask out a crush. She also taught you how to take down a grown man with nothing but your fists and a pocketknife. Old age hadn’t ever been a problem for your grandma. Or at least, that’s what it felt like.

The morning your uncle found in her lifeless in bed hadn’t felt any different than all of the mornings before. You just woke up and started to get ready for school, and then your mom… yeah, it was your mom who picked up the phone. She didn’t cry, but your uncle did.

It was a heart attack.

Your mom told you that you didn’t have to go to school, but you were still pretty young, and it still felt like every other morning before so you went to school.

You’re not sure why you’re remembering this when you first smell the smoke, or see the burning buildings from the roof of the abandoned apartment building you and Polypa crashed in. Maybe it’s because it still feels like every other night before this one.

Something deep in you that’s been irreversibly interwoven with time and space begins to tingle. This is a turning point in history, you just know it.

Polypa’s shaking her head like she can’t believe what she’s seeing. “It’s a riot. A riot. In Thrashthrust. We really aren’t…”

“Alone,” you finish with a smile so big it hurts your face.

“... Do you think this is really the right thing to do?”

“A wise man from my planet once said that riots are the language of the unheard.” You turn to her and take her hands in your own. “So let’s make them hear us.”

You’re not sure what you were expecting when you drop yourself and Polypa into downtown Thrashthrust, but you definitely weren’t expecting to almost get run over by Konyyl and Azdaja, both panting, sweaty, and smelling faintly of smoke.

Konyyl yelps and jumps about a foot in the air. “WHAT the-- oh, hi, guys. You didn’t scare me, I just… yeah.”

“Dude, what is all this? This is incredible!” you crow.

An explosion rocks the ground, followed by a giant plume of fire that shoots up into the sky just one street over. Azdaja whoops in delight, and Konyyl cheers even louder as a piece of flaming metal you think used to be a scuttlebuggy sails through the air and takes out a convenience store. Normally, something like that would have worried you, but seeing as the store’s already nearly burnt to the ground you think everybody’s already gotten out.

Not to be outdone, Azdaja telekinetically grabs on to a fallen lamppost and hurls that bad boy through the grocery store across the street.

“Show-off,” Konyyl scoffs.

“Where’s the main protest?” you ask.

“Like, a couple of blocks back that way. Some bronzeblood is leading the charge. Absolute mad lad,” she says, grinning. “I think a few more people you know might be there.”

That’s all the convincing you need to grab Polypa’s hand and take off running. You can hear the roar of a crowd chanting something.

“What are they saying?” you ask Polypa.

“Be silent no longer, when we’re together, we’re stronger,” she replied, glancing back at you with a twinkle in her eye. “I kinda like it.”

“Me too!”

The both of you turn the corner at the end of Hookedclaw street and find yourself face-to-face with a sizable crowd of about one hundred trolls. They’re all looking up to a pair of trolls standing on an upturned scuttlebuggy-- a bronzeblood, like Konyyl said, and the same big rustblood guy who you ran into last night.

You gape in shock. “Holy shit!”

The bronzeblood boy is yelling something, so you press closer into the crowd to hear what he’s saying. Most of the trolls here seem to be lowbloods, so when they see you and Polypa, an oliveblood, they gladly make room for you to join.

“... for what? A social construction that keeps us divided, because those who sit on thrones marked with the blood of our people know how strong we are together! They know that we’d be able to take control of our own destinies, and that terrifies them!” He pauses to take a short breath. “For fuck’s sake, I just want a world where I can walk down the street without worrying about getting killed! Is the bar really that damn low? Think about that, all of you!”

Another wave of cheering echoes through the streets, and you join in without hesitation.

“This guy’s spitting straight facts,” Polypa admits, looking impressed.

“He’s got balls, all right,” you agree. “That rustblood guy look familiar to you?”

She ribs you. “Yeah, yeah, you were right. I admit it.”

You turn your attention back to the boys, but they’re looking over the heads of the protestors at something behind you. A soft wave of hisses rise into the air as you turn to see a trio of purples stalking towards everybody, clubs dragging behind them with the awful scrape of steel against concrete. They’re twice the size of Polypa, except the giant fucker in the middle, who you think might be just a little bit shorter than Chahut.

“That’s a pretty sermon there, bronze brother,” he calls with a voice that crackles like burning wood. “Pretty for a load of treasonous fuckin’ shit.”

“Can’t be shittier than whatever they’re cooking up in that drug-hole church of yours,” the bronzeblood fires back with a smirk.

Even the rustblood standing next to him sucks in a sharp breath as the clown regards him with no trace of emotion. Polypa grabs your hand, and you squeeze it tight.

“You’ve got a big-ass mouth for a critter the size of my motherfuckin’ left toe,” the clown on the big guy’s right says.

“And you’ve got a big-ass forehead for a bastard with such a tiny skull.”

Somebody lets out a loud snort. It might have been you.

The feeble tendrils of bravery holding everybody together begin to unravel as the purplebloods begin to approach once more. You instinctively back up and pull your jacket hood over your head.

“Get ready,” Polypa growls.

But before the clowns have the chance to attack or use their chucklevoodoos, or before the lowbloods gather their courage enough to storm the intruders, a deafening CRACK splits the air like a thunderclap.

The clown to the far left drops like a rock, and standing over him, bat raised, is Elwurd.

She’s wearing a mask to conceal her face, of course, but you’d recognize that crest of blue hair anywhere. Beside her is Remele with her oversized mallet-club thing, and bringing up the rear with shining dual blades is none other than Ardata Carmia.

“Am I fucking dreaming,” you ask nobody in particular, and then all hell breaks loose.

The cerulean girls lunge for the two purplebloods that are still on their feet. The bronzeblood screams for everybody to scatter just as drones begin to swoop down from the sky, opening fire on the trolls below. Half a dozen kids drop dead on the spot.

You and Polypa duck into the nearest alleyway just in time before bullet holes pepper the pavement. Behind you, Elwurd roars something that sounds like “Duck!” before another explosion blows out all the windows. You yelp and cover your head as glass showers down on you like rainfall.

“Zap us out of here!” Polypa yells.

“No, wait! We have to go help the girls!”

“I’m not going back out there and neither are you!”

You glance back just in time to see Ardata drop to her knees, holding her bloody arm. She’s shrieking in terror as a drone advances on her, culling fork glinting bone-white in the darkness. Remele and Elwurd are too busy getting their asses kicked by the last living clown to help.

In that moment you can’t remember her as the bloodthirsty murderer who tortured you in her basement. All you can think of is the time she broke down in your arms, overcome with guilt at the monster she’d become in the name of being accepted by highblood society. A monster who’d traumatized you, and then became your friend.

You’re moving through space and time before your brain can catch up to what you’re doing. Ardata is cold and hard when you tackle her out of the way of the drone. The two of you tumble across the street together as the culling fork hits the spot where Ardata just was with a SHUNK. Even with adrenaline racing through your system the sound chills you to the core.

Remembering what Dirk taught you about hand-to-hand combat with a larger opponent, you grab one of her knives and zap right over to the clown, getting right up in his business before burying the blade into an eye socket.

Unsurprisingly, he drops a squirming Remele and covers his face with a scream so horrible you almost pee your pants. Ardata’s wailing your name from the sidewalk like a terrified child. You want to yell at her to shut up and run before the drones spotted her again, but you never get the chance. One moment you’re twisting a knife into a purpleblood’s skull, the next you’re flying through the air like a ragdoll before a pair of strong arms wrap around you. You and your rescuer land hard on the street with matching grunts of pain.

You look up into Elwurd’s bewildered face and burst out laughing. “Hi!”

“What the--”

“Time to go!” Remele yanks the both of you up by your scruffs like a pair of naughty cats. “Ardata, stop screaming like a wiggler and get your arse over here now!”

“My arm!” Ardata screeches. “I’ll be scarred for life!”

“No, you won’t, idiot, not when you hit your adult molt-!”

You zap the three of them out of there and into the alley, grab Polypa on your way, and then get the hell out of dodge.

The five of you end up in the back of a Troll Dennys, because of course you do. Polypa falls on you, knocking you to the ground, and then she yowls in anger when Elwurd lands on her legs, only for Ardata and Remele to hit the concrete ass-first. Remele accidentally kicks you in the stomach. Ardata falls back against a dumpster and hits her head on the metal with a BANG.

Everybody stares at each other for a long moment with varying degrees and expressions of utter shock. Polypa glares at you, and you just know you’re in for a long discussion about putting your own safety first in dangerous situations, or something like that.

You decide to break the ice first. “Anybody want pancakes?”

#riverbound #pesterquest #hiveswap #hiveswap friendsim trolls #homestuck #ceruleans #c17 #mspa reader #the guardian

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snowtimeisbesttime · 3 years

Text

Thoughts and questions (remix) on Friendsim Volume 11.

Lynera:

-Lynera joins the ranks of trolls who have Zero Social Skills for one reason or another. She really could use some friends, doesn’t she ever interact with the other jades?? // ...she does. the real question is if anyone involved remotely likes such interactions... :(

-Lynera’s in the same caverns as Bronya, but we don’t know anything about the others yet. (though apparently Wanshi might appear in next friendsim??? that’d be the Best Thing Ever)

-There’s probably more than one breeding cavern, unless every single jadeblood on Alternia is down with the nursery. Or perhaps the Mother Grub’s Cavern has a bunch of exits, with their corresponding jadeblood teams.

-Lynera is down with the nursery, however, and wants to protect it- even if it’s just for Bronya’s sake and because she’d be brutally culled if anyone with bad intentions found out. We don’t know her feelings on actually rebelling, though; as of now she’d probably join if Bronya did. She might have interacted more with other trolls and formed an opinion of her own by Act 2… // it would seem she can't stand like 2/3 of the remaining jades, so. if Daraya or Lanque dropped the topic she'd probably reject it outright, if Wanshi did it she'd attempt to discourage her (but more like Don't Do That You'll Get Murdered than That's A Stupid Fucking Idea And So Are You), and if Bronya did it she'd be at her side in a heartbeat.

-please tell me that was Not the skull of the Dolorosa on the floor in Lynera’s study cave……

-I hope the list of names mentioned in her Troll Call isn’t. A list of potential friends of Bronya??? because she’s definitely willing to kill for her… // that's the only Troll Call bulletpoint of hers that was changed, to “endless devotion”. Less actively unnerving, more emphasis on her crush on Bronya.

-The whole “learning about jadeblood life” might imply not all jadebloods go to space? If they don’t, this would mean Bronya loved Elwurd enough to leave behind the caverns and her nursery…. If they do have to go to space regardless, it might have meant rainbow drinker stuff. // it sure would be swell to find out what that was about...

-Also, Lynera doesn’t seem to know Bronya and Elwurd aren’t a thing anymore?

-Looks like my interpretation of Lynera (rule-stickler, gay) from the comic contest was mostly correct! Now all she needs is the friend group and the implied loving girlfriend. // And by “implied” I meant “exists but we haven't seen her”, as we've only seen two (2) Significant Seadweller Characters (trizza and to a lesser extent cridea). If lynera doesnt have a mermaid gf though... what's with the purple accents? Are jades allowed to go fancier than other castes, or?

Mallek:

-Likewise, Mallek joins the ranks of trolls who Really Don’t Want to go to space. He says he’s got half a sweep left on Alternia, but later he says he may have months or even perigrees… we really could use an alternian calendar.

-Okay his piercings are Cool Technological Stuff and that’s the coolest thing ever. They’re probably a mix of fashion, function and probably an ace up his sleeve of sorts; at least one’s a wifi hotspot. // I'm not sure if he needs a computer to tap into whatever things his piercings can do, or if they're connected to his brain or something and he can just do whatever whenever, but if it's the second one that's another VERY good reason not to let the empire know about his hacking skills... also according to his new Troll Call bulletpoints he lost a piercing??? he had 13 and now has 12??? i hope it just went under the couch instead of being ripped out of him or something. The other bulletpoints double down on his leet hacker skills and his leeter cooking skills, though his sweet kicks were sadly taken away from the spotlight by this.

-Mallek isn’t currently part of the rebellion, but I think he might join if he feels it’s the best option. He’s aware that Alternia Sucks at least, and his hive does get attacked by drones in his bad end (and it may have happened in his good end too, only we couldn’t hear it because we were underground*). It really depends on whether the rebellion is offering a better way to live for everyone… if Tyzias is behind it (and she has an entire anti-government movement now, apparently) it will, but we can’t be sure yet. If not because of shared ideals, he might join because of similar goals… but again, we know jack shit. // *I remember a post that said that the reason Mallek's hive doesn't get drone'd in his good end is the MC yeeted his phone into the water, so it couldn't be traced...

-Or Dammek can drop by like he probably did with Chixie and the two of them instantly bond over their hives being a Mess. // alternate reason: someone tells him how dammek was doing communications before (through an explicitly unsecured program called rebelgram, with no more precautions against potential snooping than codenames) and he's so aghast he's immediately compelled to join

-Mallek wants to control the entire drone network, and therefore the empire itself (to get out of having to go to space). Very ambitious, and very interesting… hope we get to see more of this in later friendsims/Act 2. (he’s overlooked something, though- even if he controls Alternia, the Condesce has Glb'golyb. We don’t know if Trizza has the same bond with her as Feferi.) // and even if Trizza didn't have any sway over Glubglub, the Condesce sure as hell wouldn't have been happy that some random cerulean punk took over her drones...

-I feel Diemen is living in the bush from Konyyl’s route… but at least he’s alive and hopefully doing okay!

-Ceruleans are midbloods confirmed.

-Nufren kinda feels like a one-note character (she’s literally called New Friend), but she did get a speech bubble and a quirk while Treyaf, the other troll Mallek hired to kidnap us, didn’t. At least he got his DVD’s.

-Snek lusus. Now that I think about it, we don’t know anything about jadeblood lusii… // i was going to say that jadeblood lusii probably are other jadebloods, but we know Lynera's only been in the caverns for like 2 sweeps and a half, so she HAD to have a lusus before... where is it now?

#hiveswap #friendsim #lynera skalbi #mallek adalov #long post #thoughts and questions #t&q remix

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fangsmyth · 4 years

Text

100 character development questions || no longer accepting

to save time and space imma be real and just... shove these all in one post under a read more because i got a LOT of these ( tysm!! i love talking about this piece of shit literally ask me anything any time any day of the week i’d be happy to answer )

sooo here we go!

nsfw and unsanitary mentions under the cut

@haemoneiron sent:

002. Do they do anything to celebrate their birthday?

ehhh he’ll call it a celebration, but lanque really doesn’t do much of anything different from what he normally does. he probably won’t even vocalize the fact that it’s his wriggling day, just look around to see if anyone’s already throwing a party that he can crash. if not, on alternia he probably just drank heavily in his room and played edm way too loudly.

here, he’ll probably just go to some bar and fuck somebody. so... what he does pretty much every day

016. What is their choice of weapon?

teeth! teeth! teeth! teeth! teeth! no fr if he had to pick an actual physical weapon it’d probably be a knife or a dagger, definitely something sharp and intimate...... like teeth. i say a lot that lanque isn’t a fighter but he can and will kill if he needs to

044. What disgusts them?

mainly just bad kinks! bad kinks being scat, vomit, piss, and inc*st/p*dophilia i know that’s everyone but what he considers genuinely revolting is just that specific. also people that don’t really bathe/clean themselves

---

@anglerfishnabe sent:

031. Are they superstitious about anything?

ehhh, nah i feel like lanque will see a string of bad luck as a sign that he should just go home for the rest of the day, but i don’t think it would reach much further than that. he’s definitely into people that are superstitious, and taking advantage of ‘signs from the universe’ and shlocky stuff like that, but i don’t think he really personally believes in all of that stuff. lanque is a lot of things, but spiritual is not one of them

034. What’s their view of lying?

he doesn’t see the problem in little white lies that won’t hurt anyone, especially if it gets him what he wants. ( see him HONESTLY trying to tell mspa reader he’s a virgin )

but if people lie about things that will have reaching consequences that will hurt other people, that’s just... really shitty. he does this very rarely if he’s especially desperate to get some sort of reaction out of someone, but generally speaking when he wants to hurt people and make them feel bad about themselves he points out truths based on what he gauges from observation.

---

@feraldeus sent:

013. Have they ever been bullied or teased?

yes! very much so! a lot! to the bitter end, actually! his entire cloister does have valid complaints like how he probably comes back drunk a lot of the time and has a tendency to stir the pot just to see what happens, but lynera honest to god just... hates him so much because of all the attention he garners from bronya she tended to shit talk him behind his back.

i’d imagine part of his reason behind finding it so important to be honest with how he tears someone in half is because of how much it secretly hurt him that lynera spread the occasional lie attempting to leave bronya thinking he’s beyond saving.

not only that, but i’d imagine when he was younger he probably got picked on a lot for crying and being so emotionally vulnerable and open which is why he’s so guarded now!

---

@haruakifusaishi sent:

012. What makes your character embarrassed?

openly and honestly expressing his feelings as shown in the above. generally any positive, warm feelings towards anyone are humiliating as all hell and not in the kinky way. he hates being caught being sappy or expressing romance in the sweet way he does behind closed doors.

with that, honestly if anyone that knows him for his sex drive and general hedonistic tendencies found out about his poetry readings or pretty much any of his written poetry he’d just die! that’d be the end for him!

068. How strong is your character’s sense of responsibility? What kinds of things trigger it?

lanque never feels responsibility for himself or the need to own up to his own actions at all, honestly. his entire kink is being sexy and irresponsible. he primarily feels a sense of responsibility for others’ actions significantly more than his own.

like if he witnesses someone being dishonest or just doing something generally shitty, he feels like it’s his responsibility to call them out since no one else has the balls to do it. if it looks like someone’s going to put themselves in danger, he’ll warn them. if he cares enough about them, he might go out of his way to physically drag them out of it.

it’s all in the moment things, his responsibility is never thought about or premeditated in any way!

073. In a novel, what plot role would your character fill? (hero, anti-hero, sidekick, villain, etc.)

ehhhh i wanna say anti-hero, but at the same time that could be me being inherently biased. i feel like it’d be significantly more interesting if he were a foil for any protagonist, i just seriously doubt he’d ever be the main character in anything as much as he would have the bravado of someone that wants to be?

---

@enradiant sent:

026. What do they consider ugly in others personality-wise?

lying fake bitches!!!! people that try to suck up to people just to get a leg up on others!!!!!! hypocrites!!!!!!! shitheads that aren’t at least a little self-aware!!!!!!!!!!! people that ask too many questions, fuck off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

027. What is their idea of perfect happiness?

oh god that’s a good question can i take a raincheck i dunno, just a life without any kind of fear or anger? having a perfect soulmate that’s willing to do whatever? everything is going the right way? ultimately he feels perfect happiness is impossible and unrealistic since happiness is never constant and sustainable? uuuugh tbh it’s probably something he’d never consider because he thinks it’s so dumb and not gonna happen

059. List several phrases your character is fond of uttering. Where did they pick them up?

i only use like one of these but let’s play in the space and add some lines i should definitely be using more

“ hey, baby. ” i guarantee you he got this from some movie or game i just can’t put my finger on which one. i hear it so clearly in my head every time i type it out i just hear some chick’s voice i just can’t put my finger on who it is she’s high pitched and horny i just know it’s not catherine it’s either jessie from huniepop or one of her lines in huniecam studio i’m so fucking stupid

“ will you help me feel alive? ” or something along those lines, i feel like it was from some vampire drama on the cw can you tell that i don’t know anything this is just the single sexiest line in his fucking route i’m so angry about it my pants were already off

“ it’s one thing to not want something. it’s another to be told you can’t have it. ” i cheated this one’s from how i met your mother i’m a fucking asshole but he would totally say something in this wheelhouse either to himself or to someone he’s trying to convince

“ we’re only alive once. ” a classier way of saying yolo don’t fucking @ me

“ vampires are always in some kind of trouble. i prefer to be in it with you. ” this is a weekly reminder that i really need to watch true blood

“ i’m all yours, do whatever you want to me. ” it’s jessie huniepop again please he’s just so horny

074. What is your character’s favorite game?

would it be cheesy to say the game/art of pick-up artistry? like convincing people he’s worth their time and that they really wanna forget about their troubles if only for just one night? i feel like lanque finds a lot of fun in the thrill of the chase! he's usually extremely disappointed by how rare it is for someone to actually leave him satisfied, but the last thing he wants to do is consider something a waste of time. sometimes you gotta find the fun

076. How do they express anger?

he doesn’t, or at least not in terms of any sort of emotional projection. lanque isn’t usually someone to hide if something pissed him off. he’ll wait for someone to realize, and if they don’t and/or keep doing the thing he’ll just tell them ‘hey this was really shitty, stop it.’

---

@plumbacks asked:

011. How would your character court the person of their dreams?

as in how he would act in the relationship? terribly. lanque is already really bad in regular relationships and flings, but when he’ll find the one he will be an absolutely deliberate fucking mess. he’ll dig up information just to use it against them, try and express every single one of their flaws (even when they’re flaws he actually kind of likes) he will do anything to get out of that relationship.

he’ll use his poetry as a last resort, intentionally trying to come across as overly possessive and clingy (i mean he already is, but i’m talking like yuri doki doki levels. an intentional exaggeration of his clingyness to attempt to scare them off) but when they just accept it and say that it’s fine, he’d probably blow up at first!

lanque would break up with them!!! all the time!!! the worst on again off again relationship ever!!! it would take a ton of patience for someone that he really adores to get settled into the more genuine, sappy romance he really wants to have. taking them out on trips to the countryside, laughing and sharing picnics with fine wine, discussing books and even trying to write ones together

but getting to that point will take ages! it’s not worth it!!!

#ginger lemon radler ( ooc ) ;;#yeah right ( ask ) ;;#angelic voices ( hc ) ;;#plumbacks #enradiant #haruakifusaishi #feraldeus #anglerfishnabe #haemoneiron

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ticktockstuck · 5 years

Text

Where Everyone Lives, V2.0

There’s an old post lying around here that has basically this same premise but now that we’re post-Flag Friday it’s worth revisiting where exactly everyone is in the Verse, and going into a little more detail then the V1.0 version did. I’ll be splitting this one up by district since most of the cast is in Tick-Tock Town.

Central District

Galekh Xigisi can be found near the Central-Prosperia border in his family’s antique mansion. The surrounding land is gray and dead, and inside the home has been extensively modified to accommodate oozing personages.

Tagora Gorjek lives here with his father, where he often works towards his future career when he isn’t out looking for those in need of his services. The inside of his home is kept clean as a mirror, though thanks to his bumbling clones he has to spend a lot of time keeping it clean.

Tirona Kasund lives with her brainspawn brethren in a communal dormitory run by the city. She’s lived her whole life here, same as the others, and her room is decked out in motivational posters, mathematical or otherwise.

Tyzias Entykk lives and works here, in a communal apprentment she shares with a lot of other up-and-coming law students. Her family home, however, is a modest residence in the middle of Prosperia.

The home of the aristocratic Erdehn family is here, whose questionably talented daughter Amisia is usually off in a studio being rented out in Prosperia.

Seaside District

Polypa Goezee’s main base of operations is somewhere in this district, though she has little hidey-holes scattered all over the city. Main points in common between them all are stockpiles of emergency rations, backup legs, and spare manga lying around to keep herself entertained while she’s waiting out pursuers.

Remele Namaaq lives here, in Seaside Central.

Zebede Tongva and his father live here in a run-down apartment tower infested with bees and bee-friendly plants. It’s in a block of hexagonal apartments near the Seaside-Qerse border, and a stone’s throw from Erisoldier territory in Seaside East.

Tagora Gorjek’s mutated clones have a home to themselves here, paid for by Tagora himself to keep them away from him. Its residents have given it the moniker “the Tagormitory”.

Prosperia

Amisia Erdehn’s art studio is located in a penthouse suite that comes complete with greenhouse area. Most of the greenhouse glass is covered up to keep paint and hand-vomit from splattering everywhere, and the actual living space is fairly small, but Amisia prefers it to her family home in Central.

Bronya Ursama and her wealthy parents live in a wide-but-not-deep mansion with lavish surrounding gardens. Despite having everything she could want at home Bronya’s felt increasingly uneasy and spends more of her time out of the house than in it.

Karako Pierot is staying with a wealthy family who adopted him, though few would be able to tell you he’s doing so if they’re aware of him at all.

Lynera Skalbi and her parents reside in historic Skalbi Manor in the aristocratic sector here. Their not-wide-but-deep mansion is loaded with magical paraphernalia from their family’s past, including a deep stockpile of captured demons.

Stelsa Sezyat lives and works out of a modest home she’s earned for herself. The local community is very accepting of free dolls like her and includes more than a few free dolls in their number.

The Entykk household can be found here, towards the Alterneo-Prosperia border.

The Houtek family lives here, albeit without their daughter Marsti after they mutually decided to part ways.

Qerse

Ardata Carmia lives here.

Charun Krojib lives underneath Tick-Tock Town in the Understreets, deep enough to be below the sewer lines even, but is roughly in the Qerse area. Their cave is right next to a chunk of Clocknet, which they scavenge from frequently for their art.

Chixie Roixmr and her mother have a dingy little place to themselves in the side of Qerse host to many other immigrant families from the Land of Rot and Sparks. It’s on a winding road that’s one of the most curvy in the city outside of Alterneo, but you can tell it’s her home from how many of her own promotional posters she has plastered over every wall.

Daraya Jonjet lives here in a snug two-floor house, not that you would be able to find her here during most hours. It’s in the LORAS part of town, and it shows inside and out as her parents still have the experiment-loving mindset of native LORASites. The house’s scarce room being taken up by science equipment means Daraya spends a lot of time outside the house.

Mallek Adalov and his father control a spacious penthouse, though it feels smaller than it really is thanks to all the tech cluttering the place up. The suite has as many mods as its young resident does, many of them installed to help with doll de-programming and re-programming.

Tegiri Kalbur has been a longtime Qerse native, with both his old dojo and his current apartment being found here. The former has been trashed for years but he’s made the latter into a comfortable little den for himself and occasionally Polypa by stocking the place to the roof with anime merchandise.

Alterneo

Fozzer Velyes works in an in-city cemetery and lives about a block away. The place is small for someone his size so he mostly uses it like a storage shed and just sleeps in the cemetery. Easier to keep people from robbing graves that way.

Marsti Houtek lives down in the sewer lines beneath Alterneo, in a janitorial side area she’s converted into a home for herself. She doesn’t spend frivolously so while the place is spotless from roof to floor, there’s not a lot of decoration here, though it does include a giant tub for her to toss bath bombs into.

Wanshi Adyata lives just a neighborhood away from a historic library, where she works part-time to eventually get her hands on some grimoires stored there. Her house is in one of the upscale neighborhoods closer to the Central-Alterneo border.

The Maenad household, currently sans the Maenad’s daughter Chahut, can be found here.

Emerald Quarter

Zebruh Codakk and his father used to live here in a stately manor, until the latter had a fatal accident and left the whole property to his son and his son’s significant other. The mansion used to be full of people, but now it’s only home to two. Zebruh doesn’t really leave the house anymore, but his self-proclaimed better half certainly does.

Sburbia

None of the trolls live here, actually! It’s a mostly human-populated district so no surprise there. This section’ll be more packed with stuff when I decide to include the Homestuck cast in this post.

Nocturne / Wrecked

Boldir Lamati lives with her adoptive parents in one of the nicer parts of the district near the Nocturne-Emerald border. Inside her home she has access to a wealth of academic knowledge and when she’s not off sleuthing you can usually find her at home by the fireplace with her head in a book.

Diemen Xicali lives alone in a loft above a butcher shop bereft of meat, living or otherwise. It’s a sparsely-decorated abode, and most of what is there got there thanks to doing favors for Mallek.

Elwurd has managed to fix a place up for herself here, a real model citizen when it comes to home improvement. She lives alone in a place built for two.

Folykl Darane and Kuprum Maxlol are hiding out inside a large warehouse here, one of the few places that can actually support Kuprum and the giant chunk of Clocknet stuck to him. It’s a better place than its humble description makes it out to be thanks to being close to the Emerald Quarter, with internet and everything.

Outside of Tick-Tock Town

Azdaja Knelax and Konyyl Okimaw live in a seaside mansion on the Land of Coral and Combat, won with their collective earnings in the gladiatorial arena scene. Azdaja’s taken over the surface part of the mansion with robotics and advanced tech. Konyyl’s carved her own spot in the mansion’s basement, which runs straight down to the shoreline and is full of traps and dangers she uses for exercise.

Baizli and Barzum Soleil travel with the Midnight Melpomene, performing odd jobs around the carnival and specializing in daredevil stunts. Their young age makes them a rarity within the Melpomene’s expansive staff, and impressively enough still have their own room.

Chahut Maenad, after being forced to flee Tick-Tock Town, briefly joined up with the Midnight Melpomene and eventually made her way to the Land of Oasis and Abyss. She’s settled into a comfortable position on the island of Hore Corror, though she still sometimes tours with the Melpomene to sneak back into Tick-Tock Town.

Cirava Hermod can be found deep inside the bowels of the 🐠ＭＯＩＳＴＹＳＴＯＰＩＡ 🐠, where they tend to stay after ＴｈｅＡｃｃｉｄｅｎｔ led to them becoming partly petrified. Their layer of the city is drenched in seawater and some parts are flooded, but it’s perfect to keep people from bothering them while they stream.

Lanque Bombyx lives by himself on one of the many planets of the celestial ring, though not one mentioned in this post.

Marvus Xoloto travels a lot on business and has no consistent home.

Nihkee Moolah lives on the Land of Coral and Combat. She may not be a native to the planet but she fits right in with the hyper-competitive culture, being a thus-far undefeated gladiator with a home of her own on the planet where she spends most of her time prepping for the next fight.

Skylla Koriga is trapped along with her mother inside the ghost town of Tarnation, located in a nebulous location somewhere on the Land of Dunes and Darkness. The best she’s got is a run-down farmstead but it’s not her neighbors have much better.

Vikare Ratite has no strings to hold him down. He doesn’t live anywhere anymore.

#ticktockstuck #Setting Notes #character notes #yeah i'm not tagging everybody in this individually

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friend-me-harder · 5 years

Note

hi I need more of everyone fighting over MC pls

Things can get tricky when you’re friends withevery troll you’ve met, lots of schedule conflicts, lots of going to place withmultiple friends and trying to give your attention equally.

When in the caverns, you are literally beingpulled in two different directions by Karako and Wanshi who want to play differentgames. Lynera will swoop in and say sheneeds your help with something important forcing you to leave your childrenbehind and pouting.

You don’t get muchtime to help Lynera before Lanque is wrapping an arm around your waist andleading you away to some private room to give you ‘much needed quadrant advice.’ You don’t get too far before Bronya is takingyour arm and glaring at Lanque while explaining she needs help with thegrubs. Eventually Daraya will come byand tell Bronya there’s an emergency and once Bronya has left Daraya issneaking you out to go exploring.

You’re usually bombarded with messages when youwake up from Marvus, Mallek, Zebruh, and Cirava all wanting to know if you’dlike to spend the day with them at some event or another.

Somehow one of the people you turn down showsup and sees you, tacking themselves on as a third. Which is fine, until your two friends aretalking over one another and putting their hands on you in increasingly compromisingplaces.

Working out isn’t even peaceful or easy, youtry to give Stelsa and Nihkee each a couple days with you so you don’t getburnt out on cardio or strength training. Unfortunately, they both go to the same gym – when Nihkee doesn’t wantto work in her private one.

This leadsto you being trained by two people with opposing views on what you need. You all tend to get kicked out frequently –but since Nihkee is an indigo she gets you all back in later. You think she and Stelsa may be using you toblack flirt but you’re too polite to say anything.

Fozzer has interrupted you working with Charunmultiple times to try and get you to do your part for the empire. Charun often gets testy with this and tellsFozzer if he isn’t going to work on art he should leave. Fozzer never seems fazed and will pull you awaytelling Charun that what they’re doing isn’t useful so it’s ok that you aren’t thereto help. Charun isn’t one to fight so you usually leave them pouting withpromises to make it up to them later.

The twins love when you come to play and becauseof their strength they are able to strong arm you away from almost everyone else– the main exception being other clowns. Chahut tries to get all of you to go to church, but the twins think it’sboring and end up in a shouting match with Chahut as they try to pull you away,while Chahut has a firm grasp on your shoulders.

Being at the teal’s office is always a fullday. You don’t go unless you’re ready toend up in a conference room where they’re all debating a case and asking your stance,what your understanding of the law is, who is right, see the human is on my side, tell the others why they’rewrong. A headache really

But hey, no one said being popular was easy

#mod caity #fighting over mc

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mrsegbert · 5 years

Note

"I thought you were jade" for the fic prompt because we all love some funky vaguely open-ended prompts

"[ ] I thought you Were jade. [ ]" Wanshi said. Her tone and expression were unreadable, with only the hint of surprise - not the startling kind of surprise, but one that made you almost numb. And that made Boldir worry.

Boldir shoved her hand into her pockets, hiding the cut that streamed olive blood down her prongs. She turned away, ducking her head down and averting her gaze from Wanshi.

"[ ] Boldir...? [ ]"

The olive blood sighed. "(You won't tell anyone about this, will you?)"

Wanshi's brows furrowed and her lips pulled into a small frown. She didn't understand.

"[ ] Boldir... What's going on? You're an olive. Why are you here? [ ]"

Boldir sighed, pulling the brim of her hat down. "(I'm sorry for tricking you and your friends, Wanwan. But, I'm on a case. I had to blend in.)"

It was almost too easy to be accepted into the cluster. Dress up in some Jade garbs the cerulean had given her, slap on a fake sign, approach a jade troll and say you just got transferred to Outglut. It had all gone off without a hitch. Honestly, getting caught by Wanshi was the only snag Boldir had hit, and even then, Wanshi isn't one to snitch. She knew that well enough.

"[ ] A case?! [ ]"

"(Yeah. See, I usually don't do stuff like this. But, a cerulean requested this of me, and you know how highbloods can be,)" Boldir said. (She said she was worried about a jade here, worried that she was being stalked. She wanted me to find out who the stalker was and report back to her.)"

A cerulean. Wanshi made a face. She knew EXACTLY who Boldir was talking about.

"[ ] ElWurd, right?" [ ]" Wanshi crossed her arms and quirked her brow.

"(I can neither confirm nor deny my client's identity.)"

Wanshi rolled her eyes.

"(All I know is the cerulean wants to make sure her kismesis-)"

"[ ] EX-kismesis. [ ]" Wanshi corrected.

"(Look, I don't know the in-depth entanglements of my client's love life, that's not my job. All I know is that my client wants me to find out the identity of her ex-kismesis' stalker so she can deal with them herself.)

"[ ] ElWurd is enough of a creep about Bronya already. We don't need another one. [ ]"

Boldir nodded. "(So, you're not gonna tattle on me, are you?)"

Wanshi narrowed her eyes at Boldir for a moment, keeping her arms crossed. Boldir looked back at her unblinkingly.

"[ ] No. You're secret's safe With me. [ ]" Wanshi finally said, lowering her arms to her sides.

Boldir smiled and tipped her hat with her injured hand. "(Thanks, Wanwan.)"

" - !!! Ahem !!!"

Both heads turned to the doorway. Bdir quickly stuffed her injured hand back into her pocket. Lynera stood there, hands on there hips, her eyes narrowed as she scrutinized them. " - just what is going on here?"

"[ ] Nothing! [ ]" Wanshi answered reflexively, then she focused back on Boldir, who was practically screaming at her through her eyes. "[ ] Um, Boldir got a cut on her hand! I Was just going to take her to get her cleaned up! [ ]"

Lynera's face fell, eyes filling with pity as she looked over Boldir. " - oh, poor dear. Feel better, sweetie."

Boldir gulped, nodding. Suddenly, Wanshi gripped her hand, almost dragging her out of the room. Ince they were out earshot, Wanshi turned to her, smiling softly

"[ ] That Was close! [ ]"

Boldir smiled back. It felt... Nice. Wanshi was nice. It felt nice not to be alone, to have an ally in the inside. A confidant.

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solemncadaver · 5 years

Text

Friendsim Trolls According to my Girlfriend who hasn’t played Friendsim

Ardata (Cobalt): w... who took bites out of her horns? Can and will kill you in your sleep. Plotting evil plans 23/7 (the 24th hour is for drinking coffee with LOTS of milk and sugar)

Diemen (Rust): Always eating food (why is that hot dog bun GREEN-), will never call you by your name, only nicknames like bro, dude, man etc, probably owns a skateboard but can't drive it

Cirava (Gold): Oo funky! Has a horrible backstory and doesn't talk about it EVER, is chill all the time, likes 70s-80s fashion and actually wears it with style! Is as extra as the fact they've got 4 horns

Amisia (Indigo): definitely an artist! The "weird kid", has not slept in 5 days because she just HAD to finish that one painting, cuts her own hair with scissors not meant for cutting hair yet it looks amazingly good! Probably either super pure and nice or will kill you if you breathe in her direction

Bronya (Jade): The cool big sister, helps you do your makeup and dye your hair, if you hurt one of her friends those boots will land in your face, probably has a tumblr with aesthetic images

Skylla (Bronze): Yeehaw howdy pardner! Isn't only from a ranch, she OWNS one! Can and will punch you for no reason, makes you do her chores if you wanna stay at her place, has never seen a hairbrush in her life

Tagora (Teal): Tries his best to be edgy and frightening, sometimes almost fails at that, could be in one of those "barber: say no more fam" memes, thinks he's an evil overlord but is actually just a delinquent, probably doesn't get a redemption arc and only like 2 people are mad about that

Vikare (Bronze): Wants to be a pilot/is a pilot but DON'T TRUST THEM WITH AN AIRPLANE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, pretends wearing that pilot hat is a fashion choice when in reality they can't take it off again with those horns, nobody has ever seen them sleep and people are concerned

Polypa (Olive): The most feral being (or she fell down the stairs and is mad about it), problems balancing with only one eye able to see, could claw out your heart and not bat an eye, the hole in her horn is from when someone tried to take her out, nobody has ever seen that person afterwards

Zebruh (Indigo): Looks like an ASSHOLE. What are his horns doing they're not pointed that's not how horns should work, very smug! Has a shitty job and is pretentious about it to people w/o a job, looks like the cryptic bartender in a stereotypical drama thriller that the detective has to interview to know who killed the rich guy's wife

Elwurd (Cobalt): Look at those extra af horns! Def owns a motorcycle, flirty but has never received actual affection, has a mental breakdown every 2 days but pretends EVERYTHING'S FINE, makes 5 puns a minute

Folykl & Kuprum (Gold): What a goal: Carry your bud around in your giant ass backpack! I......don't know who is who tbh but! They both have cool spider looking horns! The best evidence for 'opposites attract', the only friends they have are each other, secretly planning to overthrow the government

Remele (Cobalt): The x on her left eye symbolizes that she has found her next victim. It's you. Run. Could probably use her horn as a climbing hook, v passive aggressive, makes her own clothes, works out a lot and is stronger than she looks

Konyyl (Olive): My fight, flight or flirt instincts have been activated. Could snap you in half by looking at you yet can be super soft if she wants to (you gotta be REAL close to her though), likes matcha ice cream and yells at it when it melts, is NOT tidy

Chixie (Bronze): Shy babey. Will probably be interrupted 3 times when trying to speak because she's just so quiet, has been left on her own and now has no idea how to survive yet is too shy to ask for the way. Someone come help her please.

Tyzias (Teal): Bored college student. Will NOT help you in an emergency so don't even ask. Secretly likes cryptids, is Done (tm), nobody has ever seen her outside of campus, roasts people in the most monotone voice ever

Chahut (Purple): F-... fear ':)? Eh, that's probably just paint! Right? Right???... Is probably being forced to do horrible things, can't remember their childhood, looks scary but only unintentionally, I'd still smooch tbh

Azdaja (Gold): Reminds me of that ching prince from FMA:B tbh, has a weird aesthetic going on, has the upper hand everywhere without trying, probably has 3 fake names, is always cool but can slip up and make goofy remarks

Zebede (Gold): Smol round boi! Probably played soccer in 5th grade, now makes v interesting and functional machines from Lego, probably owned a pet hamster at some point, has no sense of danger

Tegiri (Teal): Is that a KATANA-.... Still not out of his weeb phase, is VERY devoted to his aesthetic, talks either in one word sentences or dramatic quotes from a show nobody has seen, shop owner who sells you weapons

Mallek (Cobalt): Oh look it your hubby! He looks like a trickster tbh yet all the fanart looks sweet and pure!? (Also how do you pierce horns-) how many piercings has he though? Is there fanart- 👀... anyways he kinda looks like the popular kid and the emo kid combined, but like in a good way!?! Probably has a secret key for the whole town that he shouldn't have, can store everything in that hoodie pocket (it's like Hermione's bag :3!)

Lynera (Jade): Looks like the weird art/music teacher, v nice though! Has a lot of weird hobbies that her friends politely decline to join, likes to bake for everyone, likes children or absolutely loathes them

Galekh (Indigo): Is this Roman from Sanders Sides? Jdhdkd he looks like the strict angry teacher, will absolutely refuse giving help and does not allow any flaws (both in you and in himself) can spot someone doing illegal things from a mile away, is not afraid to call people out

Tirona (Teal): Look at that spider hair! Looks good 👉👉, is probs v shy and awkward but tries to talk to everyone anyways, has some exotic pets that she doesn't tell anyone about bc someone once said it's weird, just wants to be accepted, clumsy af

Boldir (Olive): Hiding ..... something ...., private but not stealthy investigator, is distracted way too easily, is the detective I mentioned back at Zebruh's, v loyal, will absolutely get you arrested if you're *in the way*

Stelsa (Teal): Looks like a cool but bitchy mom, probably gets a manicure every week, she looks just like my mom which is scary wth, will not hesitate to roast Karen at the school bake sale, those lemon bars are horrible KAREN, why didn't you let your third husband help K A R E N

Karako (Purple): What- ?

I-.... I'm confused! But okay!

Never makes sense, nobody has ever seen them eat or sleep, appears in your room at 2 am when you have sleep paralysis

Marsti (Rust): Probably is like the classic mechanic, can weld 👌👏👉👉👍, is done with everyone's bullshit but will still try to help (occasionally), drinks too many energy drinks and not enough water, everyone asks her for favors and she is having none of it

Charun (Olive): Peaceful gardener, don't stand in their sun and they won't bother whatever you do, just wants a little farm house near a small town with his pet cat, don't walk on their vegetables or they'll chase you with a rake

Wanshi (Jade): Just a nice person. A total sweetheart. Just wants to have fun, very optimistic, the most functional person you'll ever meet, drinks a lot of green tea and hot chocolate

Fozzer (Rust): Nice person but not very bright, doesn't know how electronics work, has a flip phone from like 2006 and that's enough for him, has a lot of houseplants but can't really keep them alive

Marvus (Purple): 👀👀👀 You know how I think about him (😭🍀😏😎🍀💖🌾❤ 11/10 best ti🅱🅱y window would allow him to stab me)

Daraya (Jade): Smol but will fight you. Is super done and will not help you, but also won't stop you. Probably has 2-4 knifes somewhere on her body at all time.

Nihkee (Indigo): Looks like a pirate captain + professional wrestler in one, like! Probably drinks their coffee black just so people respect them more, will show off every trophy they have (a lot) if someone decides to listen to them

Lanque (Jade): 👀👀👀👍 the most dramatic and salty being alive, v stylish, takes 2 hours a day just to get ready, probably has 16 meetings a day, could work as a model, will cut anyone and everyone that says he should change something about him

Soleil (Purple): Ah yes, the obligatory twins. Probably cursed by a spiteful witch at birth, have never been seen seperate, occasionally like to scare people by pretending to be the twins from shining

I’m crying

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iapislazuli · 3 years

Note

thoughts on lahn-cue rewrite? well first of all, (gorss sobbing) your writing is SO SO GOOD GENUIENLY like i already liked hiveswap before i wstched ur jadecar rewrite but HOLY SHIT did it make me become absolutely OBSESSED with hiveswap.

AND THIS ONE OH MY GOD the world building the character interactions the relationships the EVERYTHING really!!!!!! its just . ogugigiigif i adore it all so much. id LOVE to know more abt bronya and lanques past bc hoooly fuck that sounds like a mess and a fucking half lol

ALSO like silly little sidenote but lynera guves me vibes of being extremely sex repulsed? i could just be looking to deep but like ace lynera ..... my beloved <:o)

thank you!!! :3 it is really cool to me that people like my writing and enjoy the stories i make. with this one I really wanted to get into my headcanons about jadebloods! like the difference between surface and cloistered. the two are pretty different from each other.... surface jadebloods go ballistic if they see another jadeblood but cloistered jadebloods are like “if i have to see another jadeblood i might attack someone”. also i think the mental image of actias paying someone to do his med school homework for him is funny. when hes taking quizzes on blackboard he just posts it on his insta story and is like “lol wuts this” and waits for people to answer for him

I based lynera and elwurds interactions with lanque on my own experiences. so yes, i would say that it’s reasonable to read either of them in the lanque route as sex repulsed , and/or asexual :-) Though I know elwurds experience of being hyper-sexualized by others for being a butch lesbian is an experience a lot of lesbians can relate to, regardless of wether or not their butch or asexual, because a lot of people see lesbianism (particularly butch lesbians) as something that’s inherently dirty or risque... it interacts a lot weirdly with being both asexual and a lesbian. I’ve had people tell me before that I can’t call myself butch if i’m an asexual lesbian. (which is weird, and dumb, you can call yourself whatever you want).

It’s not a topic I’ve really explored in writing for... obvious reasons, but I wanted to try!

#if uve been to jebs streams you know about the secret lanque friendsim cut where he calls them dykes #dia answers #i dont know if this needs a tag let me know if it does :o #cisphobicscrina

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skeletorific · 4 years

Note

Hello! I was wondering which friendsim troll do you think would be the best to rant to? Like mspa had a bad day and just needed to rant to someone kakat style about how they dropped their coffee or got caught in traffic or broke their favorite cup?

I didn’t really know how to rank this and so just decided to do all trolls and judge them based on how good they’d be to rant to. Also I’m gonna assume non-quadrant for this. The behavior would adjust a bit (depending on which quadrant)

Ardata Carmia: Absolutely does not want to hear about it unless it ends in revenge and is somehow relevant to her. She has her own minor slights to be worried about, THANK YOU. 0/10.

Diemen Xicali: He seems like a good listener up until a point, and actually has some pretty good life advice when he wants to. There is, however, a 40-50% chance he’ll tune you out to think about meat midway through. 7.5/10

Amisia Erdehn: She can be a bit no-nonsense and may tell you to suck it up more often than not, but if you get her past that hurdle she can be a pretty good listener, especially if you agree to pose for her while you talk. That said, maybe don’t use the 10 year old as a vent. 6/10.

Cirava Hermod: Will listen to you rant about the worst day of your life and respond “big mood lmao”. 4/10.

Skylla Koriga: The platonic ideal of the rant friend. She’s an excellent listener, doesn’t jump in too early, gets angry on your behalf or laughs if you’re the type to joke throughout. She’s just got one of those faces that projects empathy. Additionally, she’ll make you some good strong tea and pastry, which always help.12/10

Bronya Ursama: You’d think she’d be better at it, and she really does want to be there for you! But ultimately, well....Bronya’s a very busy person and very “solutions” oriented. Which can be good sometimes! But if you’re just looking to get something off your chest, she really doesn’t know what to do and may come off as lightly uncomfortable. She’s trying her best though. 6/10.

Tagora Gorjek: You have to be careful with your timing, if you catch him when he’s busy he’s like as not to tell you to get over it and get on with your day. Still, get him on a spa day, over some strong tea, there’s nothing he loves more than a good old-fashioned bitch session. He’s got some rants of his own, and saves them up for your mutual day of wrath. 8/10.

Vikare Ratite: He has trouble sitting still for long and it can be hard to break him out of his own head but once you get him down to earth again (so to speak) he’s a very sympathetic listener and not bad at the occasional pep talk, given his proclivity for looking on the bright side. 7/10

Polypa Goezee: She’s not quite as active a listener as Skylla but she lets you say everything you need to and has a knack for asking exactly the right question. Polypa’s not much for sympathy, but she has a way of nodding that says “been there buddy” and you almost always find that you feel better after talking to her for a while. 10/10

Zebruh Codakk: Look I’m gonna give it the benefit of the doubt and say that he genuinely has good intentions at the start but stuff that’s not about him tends to go in one ear and out the other. He tends to empathize by supplying anecdotes about his own problems, which can be grating, but ultimately if what you’re going through falls outside his experience he’s gonna find some other way to make it about him. Will be very enthusiastic to get you to use his feelings jam pile though. 2/10.

Elwurd: Also has a hard time not making it all about her own shit or just kind of waving it off with a “that’s rough dude”. Elwurd’s not great with emotional vulnerability and it really shows. Still, there’s potential if you’ve been around long enough for her to get her head out of her ass. 3/10.

Kuprum Maxlol and Folykl Darane: If you can make it funny you’re golden, Kuprum and Folykl love complaining as much as the next troll. Still, coming to them when you’re going through genuine emotional distress....really, what were you thinking? For the record, Kuprum is more likely to apologize for going too far afterwards but even that’s unlikely unless all of you are really close. Still, they’d absolutely be down to help you jack the palmhusk of the asshole who spilled hot coffee on you, no question. 4/10

Remele Namaaq: Like Amisia and Bronya, she’s typically more on the no-nonsense end of the equation and very solutions oriented. She’ll let you speak a little longer while posing but is also pretty likely to keep asking you “so what exactlye do you plan to do aboute it?” Still, she’s also likely to solve your problems just for the sheer flare of it.7/10

Konyyl Okimaw: Is a great listener and will kill you if you tell anyone. She can be a bit on the abrasive side “pfft, then WHAT, you cried like some kind of WRIGGLER?” but then immediately follows it up with “because i’ve been told crying in that kind of situation can be healthy, you know, in small DOSES.” There’s a lot of bluster, but if she can coach you through a panic attack after a massacre, she can handle this. 11/10

Tyzias Entykk: Roughly the same strategy as Polypa. More likely to joke about your problems, though if you tell her you’re not in the mood she can tamp it down. You worry sometimes about overloading her with all the stress she’s already under, but truth be told she kind of likes hearing about someone’s problems that aren’t hers. Nice change, as long as they don’t expect her to help too much. 10/10

Chixie Roixmr: She tries her best, she really does, but she’s honestly going through a lot on her own, and it can be difficult for her to hear about yet one more problem she can do nothing to solve. You’ll likely notice her politely trying to shift topics after a while, which she feels awful about, but ultimately she has to know her own limits. Still, if there’s something you know she can help with, she’s there no question. Also, if she’s drunk she will absolutely get furious on your behalf and recommend some stunningly violent solutions. It’s very dangerous but surprisingly therapeutic. 5/10.

Azdaja Knelax: Oh he’s fucking awful. He may be the brains of the group but Konyyl got the emotional intelligence. He genuinely cannot understand why you’re involving him unless you think there’s something he can do about it. Otherwise, save it for the vent chittr, kid. 0/10.

Chahut Maenad: As with everything Chahut is a bit on the changeable side, but she’s usually content to listen quietly while you get it off your chest. Like drunk Chixie, her suggestions for solutions tend to be unsettlingly violent and you’re never quiiiiite sure if she’s joking or not, but its a weirdly good distraction. Chahut tends to cope with her problems on her own, but she doesn’t mind hearing you out when you need it and extends as much sympathy as her nature will allow. Pats your cheek when you’re done and tells you to “chin up liTTle moTherfucker” but there’s a gentleness in her tone. You hope. 8/10.

Zebede Tongva: May end up being so excited by the fact that you want to rant to him that he accidentally tunes you out, but he means well. He’s not much for the emotional insight, but he gets shocked and angry and upset at all the right parts, so he does well for a listener. Just make sure you don’t upset him too much, or you may spend more time trying to calm him down than you do actually venting. 7/10.

Tegiri Kalbur: MUCH better than you would expect. Gets very invested in your problems and listens very intently. As his kohai, your enemies are his and your struggles are felt as his own. Still, he has the highest estimation of your ability to solve problems, and as such it can be hard to get a little hyped up on yourself. Be careful though. Get too hyped up and he may have you looped into a raid on whoever has offended you before you know what’s happening. 9/10.

Mallek Adalov: He doesn’t necessarily do well with real vulnerability and may flounder a bit more than necessary on the right thing to say, but he lets you go as long as you need to and doesn’t interrupt. Mallek’s not the most emotionally intelligent guy but you get the sense when he tells you he’s sorry, he means it. Depending on how low you’re feeling, will definitely let you crash. Tends to throw food at the problem until it goes away. 9/10.

Lynera Skalbi: Uh...may want to give this one a miss. She’s very defensive of you and can be hard to restrain once you’ve gotten her started. Unless you want blood on your hands maybe tell take this to one of your other friends. -5/10.

Galekh Xigisi: He can sometimes talk over you, but in general he’s surprisingly good at listening to you vent. His hive is always open (1. when he’s not busy) and in lieu of emotional insight he has a very nice goatdad who will let you pet him. 8/10

Tirona Kasund: As mentioned, don’t use the ten year olds for therapy, but Tirona takes to it a bit better. Not because she’s particularly emotionally intelligent, but because she likes the sense that you trust her enough to bring this to her. It makes her feel more adult, a feeling she really enjoys. Bringing smaller complaints to her (bad traffic, etc) can be a good way to strengthen the bond. 6.5/10

Boldir Lamati: An excellent listener, and she often takes a much broader perspective that can help you contextualize things if you need to. Failing that, though, she’s content to just listen to you talk about your day. Its relaxing to tune into. 10/10

Stelsa Sezyat: Do it while you’re doing your hair or she’s doing yours, and she’ll be the best listener you could hope for. That said, she loses points for scheduling issues. Nothing kills a good vent like someone’s beeper going off or having to be pencilled into her color-coordinated nightmare. 7.5/10

Marsti Houtek: Nothing about her demeanor indicates good person to vent to, but surprisingly enough she kinda shines if you just need someone to quietly listen and not say much. She gets that, she’s been through that, and while she’s never going to be like “tell me how that makes you feel”, she doesn’t stop you once you get started and may even give you a gentle shoulder pat when you’re done. Its not much, but for Marsti, its a lot. 7/10.

Karako Pierot: Wisdom far beyond his years. 15/10.

Charun Krojib: Usually tries to get you to vent out your frustrations through art, which is more helpful than you’d expect. They’re not the best at solutions or comfort in the technical sense, but they will occasionally have a surprising amount of insight. More than that, they’re a vey nonjudgemental presence, which is helpful. 8/10

Wanshi Adyata: Occasionally she will say something so wise and insightful into your situation that you’ll be baffled that something like that could emerge from someone so young and relatively shelters. Other times she’ll incorporate what you tell her into her fanfiction. Win some, lose some. 5/10.

Fozzer Veyles: Weirdly enough the only thing that didn’t change about Fozzer across his mindwipes is that he’s a terrible listener. Pre Wipe Fozzer would make everything about the revolution. Post Wipe Fozzer will take any complaint as a reflection of your views on the system, and lecture you about how it could always be worse. 2/10.

Marvus Xoloto: With Wanshi in terms of the Russian Roulette of vents. Sometimes he drops these insight bombs on you that just completely blindside you. Its not for nothing that he got a knack for reading crowds. But he may or may not also mine you for song lyrics on occasion. Also may try to make it a flirting thing. (”so anyways then he threatened me-” “haha oh damn and then wat lol ;op”) 4/10 at least you get to look at his tits

Daraya Jonjet: Like most teenagers, Daraya has a hard time relating to things outside her realm of experience, but she tends to get really angry on your behalf, which is extremely validating. Still, it may mingle a bit with her own general anger and wind up...not really being about her issue. She can redirect if called out though, and she tries at least to be there for you as much as you are for her. 7/10

Nikhee Moolah: Did someone say rage exercises. Because Nikhee sure is saying that! A lot! Very loudly! They ARE effective in that its a little hard to hang onto your annoyance with shattered bones. But Nikhee also gives the best pep talks, so it’s not a total waste. 8/10.

Lanque Bombyx: He’s such an asshole about it and usually act like you’re wasting his time, but he’s listening more than he lets on. You’ll be chewing him out about not paying any attention and he’ll finally burst out “for fuck’s sake if you’re haVing skin problems you can just borrow my routine” or some other, surprisingly helpful thing. You’ll have to push him hard to get him to follow through (or bribe him) but Lanque is extremely observant, even when he wants to pretend he isn’t. 4.5/10

Barzum and Baizli Soleil: R U N 0/10.

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emotionalvampyre · 5 years

Note

I would love to hear Lanque explain the appropriate/necessary times to swear to a group of young trolls. Basically Lanque teaching little ones to curse.

Lanque stands in front of a carved slate surface in one of the caverns - which is used as something like a chalkboard - and uses a chunk of whitish chalk rock to write several words across the board.

BITCHHELLFUCKSHITPISSASSDAMNCUNT

He turns back to his audience of roughly three-sweep old jades and orphans, dusting off his hands. “Alright, this lesson has nothing to do With your duties as jades, but I haVe noticed many of you hearing these Words from the older jades and asking What they mean. Of course, the older jades don’t tell you, but that’s What I’m here for.” He gestures vaguely at the board. “Each of these is a Word that is considered profane, that is, the Verbal equiValent of a slap in the face. They’re insulting, add punch to your speech, and can upset some Weaker people simply by Virtue of existing. They each haVe a real meaning, as Well as a context Where they’re used just as profanities, and they can be used as either or both of these meanings.

“First, bitch. Literally speaking, this is a female barkbeast, but as an insult, it can mean anyone slutty, annoying, mean, or just generally unpalatable to be around. For example, Lynera stabbed my moirail, and therefore, Lynera is a bitch. This is a less potent Word and some people eVen use it as a form of ironic affection.

“Hell is similarly a Weaker Word from this list. Literally, it means a place of eternal punishment Which doesn’t actually exist anyWay, or any other place or situation one Would consider as bad as eternal punishment. For example, trying to explain anything to Bronya that she disagrees With is hell. It can also be used to add emphasis to a question - Who the hell, Why the hell, What the hell, and so on. It’s not used in reference to a person, though, unlike bitch.

“Fuck is a stronger one, possibly one of the strongest. Literally, to fuck is to pail, or to be a fuck is to be someone Who is getting pailed or has been pailed. Calling someone a fuck is Valid, but it’s not a common use for the Word. Usually, it’s either used to mean pailing, or to add punch in the same Way hell does. Who the fuck, Why the fuck, and so on. It can also be used to just express shock, discomfort, anger, et cetera. Also, adding it to a sentence it doesn’t belong in emphasizes rage or frustration. For example, ‘Where is my fucking shirt’ is much angrier and accusatory than ‘Where is my shirt’. Generally, if you slot fuck in some form into your sentence, it simply makes that sentence sound angrier or more upset. Except in the case of fuck yeah, Where it makes you sound much more excited. You can also fuck With someone, Which is the same literally and in function to screWing With them.

“Shit Works similarly to fuck. Literally, it’s the excrement We deposit in a load gaper. It can also be used to compare anything to that Waste - ‘What is this shit all oVer my floor’, ‘this food is absolute shit’, and so on. It can also be used in all the same general Ways as fuck, but less often. You can also be shitting someone, Which means to fool them, or shitting on someone, Which can be literal, or just mean making them feel bad.

“Piss is also excrement, and is basically interchangeable With shit, except that it’s less potent, and isn’t really used on its oWn.

“Ass is not really a Weaker Word and not really a stronger Word, it lies in betWeen. Literally, it’s your rear cushioning bulbs. It can also be used to describe something as terrible - ‘that Was ass’, for example, is the same as ‘that Was terrible’. You can also use asshole, Which is of course the hole in your ass, and can also mean a person you hate or is terrible in general. MarVus is an asshole, for instance.

“Damn is a more general one like shit and fuck, but a little Weaker. Literally, to damn is to condemn to a punishment, and in this case, it usually goes along With hell. You can also just yell it to shoW anger, pain, or frustration in the same Way you can yell shit or fuck. Also, you can use ‘damn you’, Which means that you Wish a hellish experience on someone.

“Lastly, cunt. This is a less common one, but as such, it has more shock Value and punch. Literally, it’s a part of the genital system, and it’s also used in a similar way to ass, to compare a person to those genitals.

“There are more of these kinds of Words, but I’m fairly certain any others Would fall into similar categories or uses. You can also be creatiVe, mixing and matching these into a cocktail of neW meanings. Make sure not to oVeruse these Words, though. There are tWo reasons Why We don’t use these Words often. Well, three, but one of them is a shit reason. Firstly, the reason these Words haVe the effect the do is because We don’t oVeruse them. They’re rare and shocking, and half of the effect is the surprise of hearing it. Secondly, there are other, more eloquent Ways to express yourselVes. If you Wish to just Vent, by all means look to these Words, but if you’re trying to calmly express or explain something, there are alWays other Ways, and many of them are probably more reasonable and easy for your listener to understand. Lastly, because some people are Weak bitches and don’t like to hear these. Which is WHy Bronya doesn’t Want you to knoW them - she thinks you’re too young to be sullied by the foulness of these profanities. Still, they’re just Words. Words to use With a little more caution than usual, but still, just Words.”

He then proceeds to have a hands-on experience with the kids, where they converse while trying to use as many swears as possible, and Lanque tells them if they’re doing so correctly or not. Bronya checks on them while Lanque is explaining why ‘shitty fucking bitch’ is more correct than ‘shitting fucking bitch’, and tries to lecture the kids. Lanque leads them in a newly trained verbal assault, and poor Bronya is left speechless and helpless at a room of children yelling cvarious slurs at her while Lanque watches with a smug ass grin from the back of the room. Power move.

#Lanque's Schoolfeeding #plus a quick little extra because I thought it was funny #Anonymous

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riverboundao3ff · 4 years

Text

Riverbound, Chapter 20

Your name is MICAH, and ten nights have come and gone in what felt like a few hours.

It’s still early enough that even Lynera is still asleep in the next room over, which is really saying something because that girl is up at the asscrack of dusk no matter what night it is. You’re curled up on the sofa in the study, staring at a fungus-shaped nightlight that does a poor job of actually illuminating the surrounding area, and wondering what the hell you were going to tell your friends in the future.

Hey, guys! Sorry I kind of dropped off the grid for a while there. I fought this fucked-up version of one of my human friends, vanished into the literal void to take a nap because I was super tired from splitting a whole universe apart, and then traveled back to the past to help fight in a literal revolution… because I want to save my other friends, I guess? You don’t have to worry about that changing the future or whatever, I promise! I’m literally a god now, so I have total control over time and space.

Geez. You hope Vriska is ready to stop the others from kicking your ass.

Should you just go? You could easily spend the night on future Alternia and be back by breakfast. Teleporting still makes you a little nervous; the fear of messing up still lingers in the back of your head, but nothing bad has happened yet, so…

Yeah, you’re definitely not getting any more sleep. Might as well be productive.

You roll off the couch with a grunt, stagger a bit as all the blood rushes down to your legs, and then stumble over to the bathroom to brush your teeth and wash your face. Maybe you were about to pull up to the future to get yelled at by a bunch of teenagers, maybe not, but that doesn’t mean you have to look like crap.

The person looking back at you in the mirror startles you more than you’d like to admit. Their eyes are tired but wild, like a feral animal that’s been hunted to the point of exhaustion. Too-pale skin reflects the ceiling lights with an intensity that hurts your head if you look for too long. The dark shadows underneath both eyes are so dark they look like smudged mascara. You’ve always been very fair, even for a white kid, but you know that looking like this can’t be healthy.

Then there’s the fact that you’re still pretty underweight. You’ve been doing your best to eat on a somewhat regular basis, but you just don’t feel hungry anymore. It’s like your body already decided to give up.

And to be honest, the rest of you isn’t too far behind.

“Look at you. Sans Undertale looking-ass,” you tell the shadow in the mirror.

The shadow blinks in agreement at the same time you do.

You can’t look at yourself anymore. Moving as quickly as you can, you brush your teeth and do your best to assemble yourself into what could maybe pass for a functional human being and leave to go get dressed.

You’re rifling through your backpack for your water bottle when the lights come on in Lynera’s room. The bedroom door cracks open, and a messy head of pair pokes out, bits of sopor slime still clinging to black curls.

“Micah? What are you doing up so early?” she yawns.

“I, ah, I gotta go visit some friends a ways out of town. I’ll be back in a bit,” you promise. “Sorry if I woke you up.”

“You didn’t! A new cluster of eggs is due to hatch tonight and I want to be there!” she practically sings as she gets ready.

You feel the sadness leave your body as Lynera practically prances around as she gets ready for her shift. It’s not often she lets down her walls, but when she does, you can’t help but take a step back to enjoy the show.

“Give those babies some love for me,” you tell her as you hoist your backpack over your shoulders.

“I will!”

Alright. Here we go. You close your eyes and visualize Vriska’s living room. That’s a good place to start, right? You’ll have a quick talk with Vriska, you’ll go visit your other friends one at a time to explain what’s going on, and then you can talk to those who are interested about helping the rebellion from the future.

Time and space part easily as you zap out of Lynera’s study and--

“-- worry about OH MY FUCKING GOD.”

You yelp in surprise as somebody shrieks at a deafening volume right next to your ear. Instincts take over, and you spring backward into something big and hard. That ‘something’ turns out to be a bookshelf, as you soon find out as a couple of novels fall from the top shelves and hit you right on the head.

“Ow! Shit!”

And that’s when you realize you have twelve young teenagers sitting around Vriska’s living room, all staring at you in various degrees of shock. Nepeta, Equius, Kanaya, and Sollux are all on the sofa, with Sollux perched on the backrest like he’s ready to take flight. Terezi and Vriska are standing on the coffee table together for some reason. Eridan’s curled up on the loveseat with one hand on his rifle. All of the others are sprawled out on the carpet.

All of the others except for Karkat, that is, who seems to have been returning from the kitchen with a pile of chips on his plate.

“Oh, hi!” Aradia says cheerfully. “Wow, I can see your bones--”

“THEY’RE BAAAAAAAACK!” Vriska hollers, launching herself off the coffee table and slamming into you at full speed.

The air is smooshed out of your lungs before you can brace yourself for impact. Thankfully, Vriska catches you before you can eat shit, otherwise you would have probably just teleported back to past Alternia and tried this whole thing again some other time.

“Hey, Vris,” you wheeze, patting her back. “Happy to see you too.”

“Fucking HELL, don’t do that,” Karkat yells, stomping over to the sofa and plopping down next to Kanaya. Kanaya purses her lips in mild amusement and delicately plucks a chip from his plate to eat.

Vriska just scoffs. “Don’t be a baby, Vantas, you know full well Micah can teleport--”

“Eat my full ass, Serket.”

“Hi, Micah!” Nepeta trills. A general murmur of greetings follows that, some more enthusiastic than others. Sollux, Equius, and Tavros all seem to be very on-edge tonight.

Feferi actually hops up to give you a hug as well, thankfully with a lot more care than Vriska had. It’s becoming weirdly normal to know that this big-ass six-sweep old girl could crush your skull like an eggshell.

“Don’t worry, nobody’s mad at you, I promise,” she whispers in your ear.

“Huh?”

Vriska grins and clasps your shoulder. “Oh, I already told them everything.”

“... Oh, boy.”

You turn back to the others and try your best winning smile.

“Yeah, what the fuck, dude?” Sollux demands.

“How are we even gonna exist with this kind of thing?” Karkat splutters, throwing his hands up in the air.

Tavros winces. “We get that you can do crazy space-time stuff, but--”

“You’re in way over your pan, retard!”

Ah, fuck. “Listen, guys, I know what I’m doing sounds pretty insane. And I’m sorry that I can’t tell you how exactly I’m going to pull all of this off because… you know, time shenanigans. But I need you guys to trust in me, at least for now. Also, Karkat, let’s not use that word. It’s extremely disrespectful.”

“Who are you, my lusus?” he challenges.

“No. Should I zap over and get him myself?”

“NO!”

“That’s what I thought.”

Vriska snickers under her breath. Karkat gives her a look that just screams murder.

Everybody else still looks a little queasy. Guilt rears its ugly head for the millionth time in the hour you’ve been awake, fearful and taunting and ashamed all at the same time. If you could just tell them everything, right now, you wouldn’t have to feel like this anymore.

Tell them.

You don’t, because you’re a coward, but you do try and calm everybody’s nerves again. “To elaborate on what Tavros just tried to say, yes, I can do crazy space-time stuff. Which means I can do stuff in one point in time and it won’t completely fuck up all the other points in time. It’ll change things, sure, but it won’t erase people.”

“What about our memories?” Eridan asks tersely.

“Definitely not,” you tell him. I won’t let that happen. “If everything goes according to plan, things will just start… changing.”

“We’re gonna make a new world that’s better for everybody!” Vriska announces proudly. “That’s why you guys are all here today.”

“By our human friend fighting in a rebellion that was already lost? Setting aside the fact that’s… treason… that also sounds rather dangerous. Micah, you aren’t a great fighter,” Equius says. His voice is quiet, but he’s so stiff you could probably use him to prop open a barn door.

“A rebellion is a lot more than just fighting, dude. So far I’ve just helped teleport people around,” you remind him.

“... Still.”

Nepeta suddenly surges to her feet, eyes blazing. “I don’t care that it’s treason! Don’t you care about what they did to me? My whole neighborhood got burned down in a drone strike!”

“Nepeta--”

“No! I remember everything now. I’m gonna help them win, ‘cause, ‘cause… even though we all had to suffer, the ones who come after us might not have to.”

Nobody speaks for many heartbeats after that. Something about what she said rings inside your head, sticking to your neurons like glue.

“See? Nepeta knows what’s good!” Terezi yells.

“This is insane.”

“Yeah, it’s awesome!”

“I’m in,” Aradia agrees, winking at you as she smooths her skirt down. Your anxiety backs down a little at her blatant support. Aradia Knows Things, right? Surely if she thinks you should keep doing what you’re doing…

“So am I,” Tavros announces, setting his jaw defiantly. Nepeta seems to have set off a chain reaction, because everybody else sits up a little straighter, eyeing each other as if daring anybody else to go first.

“And I,” Kanaya adds.

Karkat groans. “Fuck you guys. Fine! It’s not like we can play SGRUB anymore.”

“You guys are gonna die,” Sollux says, scrubbing his face with the palms of his hands. “We. Are. All. Gonna. Die.”

“So are you in?” you ask, reaching over to poke his arm.

He smacks your hand away. “Get fucked. Sure. Whatever.”

“Yay!”

Eridan huffs quietly and crosses his arms. “Well, you guys are gonna need somebody with power to help. And money. I’m in.”

Equius turns to stare at him with his jaw nearly on the floor, and you’re so full of pride you think you’re going to explode. You should have known your friends would eventually come around. And with not one, but two whole seadwellers on their side, they were truly going to be a force to be reckoned with.

“I knew it! I knew you cared!” Feferi squeals, jabbing a finger at her ex-moirail. Eridan curls up tighter on himself, but that doesn’t stop a small smile from lighting up his face.

“Is that a yes from you, Feferi?”

“It’s a hell yes, Micah!”

Gamzee smiles lazily from underneath the coffee table. “I told you motherfuckers. I told you a miracle was coming, and here it is.”

Poor Equius looks like he’s on the verge of a panic attack. “I-I… you can’t possibly, I mean--”

“If you’ll excuse us!” Nepeta chirps, effortlessly pulling her moirail from the couch and slinging him over her muscular shoulders. The indigoblood yelps indignantly, but Nepeta just prances on upstairs as if she’s carrying a sack of potatoes and not a teenage boy nearly twice her size.

“What’s up with olivebloods and being insanely buff? I mean, my girlfriend’s taken on a jadeblood and a teal at the same time and she won,” you wonder.

Karkat immediately focuses on you with the intensity of a laser. “A girlfriend? You’re in a relationship?”

“Micah’s got a girlfriend!” Feferi yells, picking you up and twirling you around.

“What quadrant?”

“Is she cute?”

“An oliveblood, right-?”

“We wanna meet her!”

“Guys! Can we please focus on taking down the Empire? We can gossip about Micah’s love life later!” Vriska yells, clapping her hands for order.

You rest an elbow on Feferi’s shoulder, enjoying being tall for the moment as she’s carrying you. “Ooh! You got a mission plan, Vriska?”

“You bet your skinny alien ass I do!” She pauses for emphasis and puffs out her chest. “We’re gonna go beat up a bitch for using lowbloods as FLARP bait!”

“Didn’t you do the exact same thing not too long ago?” Karkat scoffs.

Vriska scowls down at him. “Yes! Yes, I did! But now I’m gonna turn things around and help them instead, okay? ‘Cause I’m changing my…. my toxic behavior.”

She looks to you for support, and you give her the thumbs-up.

The others actually look a little impressed, which gives her the courage to keep going. “In half an hour Terezi and I are going to meet this violetblood dude who’s been responsible for a lot of rust and bronze deaths in the area. It’s a FLARP session at sea, so he’ll have his team-- I mean hostages-- on board with him.”

“You need a team?” you ask.

“You offering?”

“Of course.”

“Yes! But no passing out on me! Our goal is to neutralize the threat, secure the hostages, and deliver them back to shore so they can go home. Any questions?”

“I’m coming too,” Eridan says. He hops to his feet, dusting off some invisible debris on his pants. “That’s not a question, though.”

“Can I come? It sounds exciting,” Aradia begs.

“Sure! Anybody else?” Vriska scans the crowd with a smirk, as if saying You are all too pussy for this kind of adventure.

Unfortunately, it works. Karkat and Feferi step forward as well, which brings the team total up to six. Everybody else gets ready to go home before the sun comes up. Out on the horizon, heat lightning crackles in the sky like a strobe ball. You end up leaving your jacket with your backpack on the couch, because even for somebody who has trouble retaining heat, Alternian summers are brutal.

Surprisingly, the team figures out their FLARP-ing shit quickly enough, as they all played at one point or the other. You still have no idea what to make out of all the numbers and stats and scores that come with each move, even though Vriska makes it all look like child’s play. Karkat keeps grumbling about “games for girls” which has your hackles up until you remember that female trolls tend to be more violent than the males. That makes sense to you, especially when you remember Remele beating the shit out of that purpleblood and all of Lynera’s knives.

In almost no time at all the six of you are sailing out to sea, the wind in your hair and the smell of salt water filling your nose. If you close your eyes and pretended, you could almost imagine you’re back on Earth, taking a boat ride with your mom’s boyfriend and your stepsister at the lakehouse--

A particularly large wave knocks you back on your ass, and the memory cuts off as quickly as it began.

“Fuck!” you hiss, trying to get your bearings. You try as hard as you can to visualize what you just remembered, but all you can recall is sunlight sparkling off water, the rumble of an engine, a man laughing and nearly choking on his beer as your tiny preteen self got knocked around by the rocking of the motorboat.

A strong hand picks you up by the arm and sets you on your feet. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Thanks, Fef.” You pat her elbow. “Sometimes it’s rough being a little guy.”

Her eyes are round with sympathy. “Looks like it. That reminds me, I wanna ask your opinion on something really important.”

“Oh, okay!” Wow, the Heiress of Alternia is asking my opinion on something? Talk about friends in high places.

… Wait, what was I trying to remember?

“What do you think of the hemospectrum?”

You purse your lips. “Well, if that ain’t a loaded question I dunno what is.”

“I mean, you don’t have to answer, but…”

“You know what I think? I think that the hemospectrum could have been a really good thing. Those who live for quite some time, paving the way for those who won’t be here as long? Sounds great. But then it became about power and control. And-And I think that if-- that once we win, we can’t go back to that system. There’s just too much trauma that’s been birthed from it that’s affected literally every troll to have ever existed,” you explain.

Feferi considers that, and then she nods in agreement. “That makes sense.”

“Oh, shit, is it big brain hour?” Terezi calls from the wheel.

“It is!” Then you do a double-take. “Why is the blind girl driving?”

“Vriska’s getting dressed.”

“Do you even know where we’re going?”

“Forward.”

“Bruh.”

Karkat throws up for the fifth time over the side of the ship. You groan and stumble over to him to pat his back.

“You’ll get your sea legs soon,” you promise.

“I hate the ocean. Why does there need to be oceans. I never would have thought I would ever say this but by infant Troll Jegus do I miss Texas. It’s hot, it’s human-racist, but there is hardly any damn water and for that it’s easily one of the best places I’ve ever been,” he rasps.

You smile. “Wanna see Dave after this is over?”

“Yes, please. Strider’s bullshit is the only thing that can numb me to the pain of occupying the realm of mortals.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you see Eridan smirk. You turn to look at him in confusion, and he makes the quadrant symbol for flushcrush: two thumbs pressed together over the center of his chest, where a troll’s heart would be.

Really? you mouth at him, delighted by this unexpected turn of events. He nods eagerly, clearly just as enthusiastic about Karkat getting a boyfriend as you are, but before you can sneak off with him to get the tea his gaze fixates on something past you.

You turn to see the small speck of what is undoubtedly another ship coming your way. A ship that is much bigger and fancier than the 8rigantine, at full sail and most likely armed to the teeth.

“He’s coming on our eleven!” Feferi calls up to Terezi.

“Go get Vriska,” the tealblood orders. Her perfectly white fangs flash in the light of the moons as she grins like a shark. “Time to kick this bitchboy’s ass!”

#riverbound #hiveswap friendsim trolls #hiveswap #mspa reader #c20 #the guardian #beta trolls #pesterquest #homestuck

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