#I LIKE MORNING LIGHT HYMNUS MORE

[noxtivagus]

i'm so embarrassed.. parade's lust is pretty high up in my top songs 😭😭

#🌙.rambles #17 all time n 18 for top 2022 #i swear i hate him #I LIKE MORNING LIGHT HYMNUS MORE #crying screaming i love gbf so much still #ngl i still haven't recovered from the event story #GRIMNIR. I SWEAR I'M #THE EFFECT GRIMNIR HAS ON ME? I SEE HIM I HEAR HIM N SUDDENLY I'M A SMILING FOOL #gbf & ffxiv r so weird they have me. so #look it's been more than 2 years but still they #HKFJASDLKFSJD 😭😭 #can i ramble about how much i love morning light hymnus! i'm listening to it rn #the lyrics r so romantic on the outside but. there's definitely some obsession that it's rooted in #desperation. belial. hfdlkasdjflkdfj #ngl i can't deny he's one of my favorite characters #i really love the song so much.. from the lyrics to the melody n harmonies n everything literally everything #i love songs like that so much #as much as i love morning light hymnus though. uh #i wna know how much i listened to existence this year. there's something just so special about that song for me #5th all time and 2nd this year. #BUBS IS SO COOL 🥺 #i love the lyrics for existence sm i relate to them a lot n #hdklfasjdfks served as so much inspo! 'transient wings' n then. GOD THIS SONG I WOULD DIE FOR IT #I REALLY. REALLY LOVE EXISTENCE #THE LYRICS MEAN EVERYTHING TO ME. #thinking about it n one kind of music i really like are. yk those powerful ones. that r rather elegant #if it has lyrics then it's rather poetic. pretty words hehe well-written #a lot of gbf osts come to mind. ff too n a lot of vgs i like. octopath kh nier yeah stuff like that #apocalypsis noctis. forza finale. a beautiful song. rose queen. decisive battle ii. insanity. oh please kiss me /p if you recognize those #goddamn to whoever brings me to an orchestra of any video game i like i'll marry you

[goldenteaset]

I've seen a fic suggest that Belial just didn't get to sleep very deeply, because then he wouldn't have been able to conceal himself

I just think it's funny to imagine he's so unhinged in the present day because he is severely sleep deprived. Also, I want to roll him into a blanket and let him get some rest. Poor man has been through a lot

Morning Light Hymnus mentions a million lonely nights, so I imagine he at least spent some of those nights awake. Either having meaningless sex and/ or just staring into the void, missing Lucilius

Finally, there's just something poetic to imagine that Belial spent 2000 years alive while Lucilius was essentially asleep

But I think it's valid to go with your favorite reading and do what you think is best/ most interesting! So no judgement on you letting him get his well earned rest. If anything, give him a kissie from me when you tuck him in <3

Aww, thanks anon! I like that fic's idea, too, as it makes sense that Belial would be "sleeping with one eye open" so to speak.

In retrospect, I did word that post as a bit more...angry...than I'd like. ^^; Call it "scrolling through GBF twitter is difficult sometimes" syndrome. You make a lot of good points, like the "million lonely nights without you" line and the comedy of him being unhinged through lack of sleep. ("Let's sleep together~. No, really. Please. PLE--"

I'm definitely taping "But I think it's valid to go with your favorite reading and do what you think is best/ most interesting!" to my forehead, by the way. Because yeah, we all have different interpretations of the source material, and that the source material allows for that is really fun in the long run.

(And I will definitely give him a kiss in your stead! He kisses almost everyone else on the head before bed in my fics, he needs that good-sleep charm too. ;v;)

#asks #anon asks #belial gbf #granblue fantasy #thank you anon! #I think sadly about that “million lonely nights without you” line often...

[icharchivist]

Between Existence and Morning Light Hymnus, which is the better love song for Lucilius?

ooooh hard one hard one

i think MLH is the most desperate one in a sense? Existence is a GREAT song in term of love and stuff but it does have kind of a vibe of "i love you and i want you by my side, but if you don't want that, i'll destroy everything, appreciate it" while MLH is really just "i can't live without you" vibe yaknow? Much more codependent.

so i think MLH is the one where the feelings are just. so desperate. the goal is so small in comparaison to Existence.

but personally i love Existence more. esp the excalation from the longing to purely embracing the destructive mood.

honestly Existence is probably one of my fav song from granblue, and while i really like MLH it isn't one of my favs at all.... so i'm biased on that lmao.

Either way Lucilius would hear both song and just send those two a death glare and turn his back, not even worse acknowledging for him. What a lad

#ichareply #ichafantalks gbf #anonymous

[noxtivagus]

ain soph aur making me feel things i shld be asleep rn 😭😭

#🌙.rambles #[ gbf. ] #rather comforting that i'm once again. idk returning to this part of me? #like.. not embarrassed by it or wholly compelled to hide it #or maybe it's bcs it's 6 am rn n i'm very stressed bcs i have a bunch of assignments to do bcs the christmas break is soon and #i was finished w one assignment earlier but i accidentally lost what i wrote oh well i'll just rewrite it later #n then i'm just rambling n dumping here but . fiction #immersing in stories once more have made me. yk. live as i always have. full of love for whatever means a lot to me #particularly rn it's gbf #T_T #belial lucilius lucifer sandalphon vira nier anthuria #wait #my queue is so unfair rn ik i added these songs but. morning light hymnus then ain soph aur then another sky.. 💀 #I LOVE THE. YEARNING #THE LONGING???? IT'S SO PAINFUL N BITTERSWEET N I'VE ALWAYS LOVED IT #iirc two years ago when i listened to another sky n searched up the lyrics. vira rlly became one of my favs #when it comes to charas i like i realize tho that color scheme genuinely influences me so vira's not the type that i'd often talk about #but she's a very special character to me. #idk but.. characters like belial vira nier anthuria there's something i really like about them #i'd joke that it's bcs i'm a scorpio haha #WAIT I'M GETTING OFF-TOPIC #ain soph aur lyrics always hurts!! i love those two so much #what makes the sky blue.. ARGHHH PAIN. #honestly i cld never pick between lucifer/sandalphon or lucilius/belial. they're both so bittersweet in a way that appeals to me #yk i was reading some old stuff i wrote like. more than a year ago now n how tf did i write stuff so. damn. #the lyrics of nier's song r also so pretty. she's a bit of a dark character n she's. v sad #huh. thinking too of emet-selch ffxiv & haruka milgram n. all these characters r so similar in a way #i wonder if i like them bcs i relate to them. to have love returned. or i want to love them. to give as i am wont to do. perhaps both #yearning is so bittersweet but perhaps i'll just lose myself in fiction again. i have assignments to do anyways lmfao i #i won't let myself sleep until i've finished them all. oh but dw i'll just take care of myself after ig

[noxtivagus]

thinking abt lucilius n belial hdfkajsdlkfd

#🌙.rambles #(THIS IS MESSY IM LIKE V SLEEP-DEPRIVED. take everything i say w a grain of salt. anyways..) #they're a bit fucked up but ngl they're one of my fav pairs #THERES SM SO SAD ABOUT THEM #i think lucilius is very cool #he reminds me of ffxiv hermes in a way.. both r among my fav charas but #^^ they're quite the opposites. very much opposite since hermes is very empathetic while lucilius is uh.. </3 #i can't remember the ship name for faa n belial but #i love how wmtsb touches on different kinds of love in a way? #stuff like yk. lucisan. belial. lucilius. stuff related too w the skydwellers n all #cilius n belial r pretty sad bcs there's belial who. his yk to faa. a rather twisted love. perhaps obsession but #faa's so. indifferent. to him #morning light hymnus rlly has this desperate feeling to me. from belial to lucilius. it's pretty romantic from a front yes but #to me more than that it feels so. desperate. #he's. incredibly dedicated to lucilius #OHH.. READING SMTH RN N YEAH #gbf wmtsb has stuff on. reciprocated love #sob oh yeah that bit w.. lucifer's love for the skydwellers but. he never really received. anything back. no reciprocation #maybe that's why he's my fav still. more than cilius or lucio i still wld say lucifer's my fav #he's just so. kind n beautiful n pure and. yeah #i rlly love wmtsb so much!! it has so much that r very dear to me. the whole series just appeals to me so much #from mythological stuff w angels n then stuff to do w the sky n love n #i haven't finished the third part yet despite playing for more than 2 years n i'm like 150+ rank yes i procrastinate That much #IT MAKES ME SO NERVOUS TO CONTINUE.. #idk what i'm saying atp i rlly just want to write anything! i shld work on school stuff i'm not Too sleepy rn #also last thought yk that art of some of the wmtsb characters with flowers. yes #belial's r roses. they look blue to me but white is also a possibility???? like a thread i saw on twt a while back said #white roses.. blue roses.. THEYRE MY FAVE :<< n either of the meanings of the flowers kill me inside i'm weak #iirc lucifer w lupines is also so goddamn unfair 🥹 okay but. hdkflajsd i have stuff to do now i shld stop procrastinating!! #yk smth i don't really say but. belial was one of my fav charas even from two years back. i hate.. i hate the way i relate to him in a way

[noxtivagus]

lucilius & belial

#🌙.rambles #[ gbf. ] #will i ever shut up about how much i love gbf? no #wmtsb oh my god just brainrotting abt it rn #morning light hymnus #belial he's like. this character that has a lot on love? #like most of the time he's v perverted n all yeah but #if my memory serves me right he's technically in love w lucilius right #think about how. how it must be for someone like belial #bcs lucilius is so #has he ever shown any reciprocation for it? #morning light hymnus has a desparate tone for me #& then thinking of those two n their #the parallel w lucifer/sandalphon #i wna say more but oh my god cramps bye

[noxtivagus]

gbf's ost is Too good <33

#🌙.rambles #[ gbf. ] #i love music i genuinely feel a bit better now #licht!!!! i love the guitar so much oh my god i love for beats like that #other songs that have similar vibe to me wld be like #the same way i love songs like children of the city from mili & cerberus from ffxv & dark beast ganon from botw #& cyrus the scholar from octopath! i like that type of beat a lot #i really love listening to the uhh instruments or wtvr in these songs #moonlit melodies from ffxv & night in the brume from ffxiv r other songs too that. piano. n the others in the back #hmmm from the top of my head star-crossed blades from gbf & liberty and death from ffxiv. similar vibe #not alone from ffix & a father's pride from ffxiv #tifa's theme from ffvii & theme of love from ffiv & revali's theme from botw #waltz for the moon from ffviii & opera maria and draco from ffvi & starlit waltz from ffxv & indulgence from ffxiv #my music taste is. really broad #bcs i love love soft n gentle melodies but i also love like. metal. yeah. #realizing recently w listening to more artists that i like alternative rock a lot #n huh stuff like. hmm. vibe of like let's say ren zotto & eve & vocaloid & pjsekai songs #from gbf songs i listen to existence & morning light hymnus & order of the new world most #but also rose queen & lyria & zero & paradise lost & uhhh undeniably parade's lust shush #from chara songs my favs r ain soph aur & uhh the one with ferry & vira & nier & societte n yuel & stardust children n #help no wait i like too much i can't list them all down >< but. oh my god i love music so much #i'll get carried away if i list a lot but i really do like a lot of genres huh #n help there's a lot of songs in ffxiv's ost right. play any n i'm confident i can name it #i really like ppl w big music tastes too #ykyk i find it interesting thinking abt that for others. like. i can really see how the music they like reflect on them #i'll talk too much if i expound on that but goddamn i genuinely rlly do love learning so much #about the world abt others. i can't help but be so curious T_T so if there's something you've put out to the public #it's very likely i know of that info. i. really seek out a lot of information. there's a lot going on in my head fr #i am incredibly getting off topic again but i rlly. in the end yeah love myself i love these traits i have #i can't deny i'm intelligent to an extent but there's so much i don't know aaaa i wna learn so much! there's so little i know! 🥹🫶🏼

[noxtivagus]

oh my god i really love the existence song sm from gbf

#🌙.rambles #[ gbf. ] #always has been one of my top fav songs #uwahh i wrote a lot in my notes today after all that w my cousins so #i'm a bit tired to interact rn 😭😭 i need to regain my energy oh my god aaa sorry if i get to stuff late :') #existence tho >< in spotify tho it's top 5 of all time #i find it rather crazy how a whole goddamn 10 minute song is my top of all time #NO WAYYYY i've listened to apocalypse (cas) more than existence now #ok but existence!!!! i love the lyrics so much. gbf songs r. oh my god i love them so much #EXISTENCE IS MY FAV THOUGH morning light hymnus wld be second n then zero/order of the new world tied in third #i love the rest sm too. PARADISE LOST <333333 but i will act like i'm not a belial liker. #parade's wtvr was 'definitely' not one of my top songs last year??? #i love the instruments in existence so much oh my #n like. the lyrics. oh my god the lyrics #HONESTLY I RELATE TO IT PERSONALLY IT FEELS LIKE IT TOUCHES MY SOUL. MY IDENTITY #beelzebub my man you are so cool #wmtsb then the dragon knights then the eternals stories in gbf are my favs in order #ik they're all popular n i like a lot more as well but ^ means so so so much too me #i love angels. i love kingdoms n knights. n the eternals are sooo goddamn cool #my top favs are also in these series hfkjdalflsd #lucilius introduced me to the game actually when i saw him in mudae 🥹 pretty boy #then i saw more gbf charas in mudae n a friend eventually recced the game to me n apollo so we ended up trying it out #looking through all the charas n lancelot became my fav. he's my second fav now though #first is. ok lucifer was my first fave but w what happens to him it became tied w lucio. n i ended up liking lucilius a lot again #seox is my third fav!!!! i just find him incredibly cute. that type i have that's a bit shy. thinking abt it n he's similar to noctis oh wo #i relate to all ^ in a way but i will not expound right now bcs 🫣 #from the girls silva was my first fav bcs she was my first chara! n i grew fond of bea. tweyen's another fave of mine #n vira oh my god her color scheme's less of my type but she's always stood out to me as well >< cries in her character song makes me sad #I LOVE IT SO MUCH. ANOTHER SKY. THE LONGING???? THE LOVE???? MA'AM I LOVE YOU

[icharchivist]

There's something so utterly tragic about Belial being touch starved, so he gorges himself on sex, basically, but it still doesn't fill that void in him

He's eating everything he can, to stick with the metaphor, but he doesn't feel full and continues to starve, so he keeps eating

EXACTLYYY.

i genuinely think it's what's happening tbh. Like. Idk this is how the whole process of sex sounds in Parade's Lust in particular. I don't get the feeling he really feels satiated once he gets what he wants. I feel like he always want it, more and more and more, and then he gets bored, and then it's whatever, and then it's searching for some kind of carnal release but not finding it, and then it's always remembering that you're rotten and hollow and nothing will ever fill this gap, even if you try to distract yourself by anything that could give you pleasure even for a bit.

He's starved, he can't feel full, but the taste in his mouth when he eats momentarily gives him some sort of release... for as long as it's still in his mouth, and then it's gone, and so he seeks it even more.

And to me the tragedy works very well on that regard with everything we know about Belial. Especially adding in how much he made the violence he gets and the violence he gives sexual. I think it's all an extention of that, of desperately seeking any pleasure in some touches, but since all he wants, like in Morning Light Hymnus, is just to hold his beloved's hand, he's not actually getting the "food" he needs.

and it's utterly tragic. But makes sense, doesn't it?

#ichareply #ichafantalks gbf #anonymous

[icharchivist]

I agree, especially because Existence is like "What do you want?" meanwhile Morning Light Hymnus is very much "Please take this poor sinner's hand" and is overall more self-centered, so good job Bubs, the most egocentric man in all the skies, for at least asking the object of his affections what he wants to do. Sure, it's still very much "I'm gonna destroy the world anyway, but even if it's just a formality, at least I'm asking if you wanna join me or perish along with it", which, y'know, power move. Beelzebub is aware of other people's boundaries, but at the same time knows what he wants and is going to go for it. Gotta respect the hustle

Yeah pretty much right???

I feel like in MLH Belial puts himself into a submissive stance begging for Lucilius's affection and he puts himself as this humble servent, this poor sinner, who would just be happy would his master look at him his way. he also talks about the lonely nights without him, just how much Lucilius affects him, dead or alive.

but in Existence, while Bubs do want to know what Lucilius would want to do next, and that he wishes he could do it all at Lucilius's side, he's also just... set on his goal. If Lucilius is at his side, it'll be good for him, but if Lucilius is not, well. Won't change that he has another goal first and foremost.

So it's true it translates with Bubs asking for Lucilius's boundaries too in his conquests of it all, and it also shows a lot more... let's say, personhood, to know not to just make yourself miserable when you're not loved back. Which isn't the case for Belial.

the difference between those songs is really that in Existence, Beelzebub wants to destroy the world, and he would be glad if Lucilius was by his side. but in MLH, Belial wants Lucilius at his side, and if he is, they'll have fun destroying the world together.

Which means Lucilius is more important to Belial's goal than for Beelzebub's.

but honestly kudos for Beelzebub to actually manage his crush in a healthy way.

#ichareply #ichafantalks gbf #anonymous

[icharchivist]

Sex is the only love language that Belial actually understands sounds like a meme but it also makes way too much sense?

It's the only form of connection he truly knows and associates with love and affection

It's actually really sad if you think of his horniness as not 100% a front to freak people out but also at least a kernel if him seeking for something positive in the only way he knows how

Right??? That's the magic of his characterization, the guy sounds like a meme but the moment you dig into the implications it becomes sad.

I definitely think his horniness isn't just a front, though he uses it as one as well. Again, contradiction is key.

The way i see it is: the one person he always seeked appreciation from is Lucilius, and Lucilius would never have done anything like complimenting him, being affectionate to him, recognizing his work, doing things for him, ect... any sort of showcasing of affection.

But we have seen Lucilius hit Belial. And also, contrary to the rest of those "love language" that are one sided on the action itself (you decide then if you return them or not), if your skin touches someone's, their skin also touches yours.

So taking it this way, if Belial is starved for affection, any type of affection whatsoever, especially coming from Lucilius, wouldn't it make sense that he processed that, considering touch was the only thing he could get from Lucilius, therefore this was the only way he could receive affection?

In Parade's Lust, sex is described as "desperately looking for carnal release". To me it screams that more than anything else, Belial is touch starved. Belial has been deprived of affection and he's only ever received touches, even without an affectionate context, just enough to give him a taste of what he could demand, since the rest isn't something he could get otherwise.

I think it's also telling that in Morning Light Hymnus, all he begs Lucilius for is for Lucilius to hold his hand.

He's desperate for touch. It's the only thing Lucilius would give him, just enough to give him a taste, just enough for him to want more.

Meanwhile Belial's own love language to Lucilius are mixes of act of services and words of appreciation. He knows how to show it to Lucilius, but he has never been on the receiving hand of it with the person that mattered.

Lucifer might have given him words of appreciation but Lucifer comes with so much bagages that it probably just made Belial feel more sick than feeling like he was receiving love. Deprive someone of something for too long and they would no longer recognize the taste when it is given to them.

I think eventually it's why he's so taken aback by Sariel's constant "act of services" type. That's a language Belial is used to give but not used to receive. And I think it's telling that he immediately pushed Sariel away the moment Sariel offered himself fully to Belial on that regard.

So imo it's pretty much this level of being so starved for any type of affection, that all of the rest become foreign, just things he can give, but not that he can receive. But touch being mutual, it's enough to give him a taste and want more, and eventually, the more he wants the one thing he has been allowed to taste, the more he twists it and perverts it because he wants more of what he was given.

And when he didn't have Lucilius anymore, all the rest was too foreign to receive but touch, touch he could do, and he could push on this side of him that was so touch starved he wanted more. But it wasn't with Lucilius, so i'm sure it felt just hollow enough that therefore he needed to push this desire to touch even further to fill the hollowness that was the absence of love (from his side).

Honestly it's also the reason i think he associates pain to pleasure.

I definitely think that Belial *loves* Sex, it's not just a front he puts on. But i also think it comes with a lot of bagages about being so damn emotionally and touch starved. And i do believe he also uses it as a way to keep distances with people, to show them this "gross" side of him that indulge into his vices. Isn't it so /disgusting/ how much he's starving for love? Lucilius always found him disgusting for that. I'm sure Belial just sees himself as disgusting for it. But he pushes through because it's all he has.

in his gbvs avatar profile he says he loves Love and hates Love. It's all he knows. It disgusts him. He starves for it. He is never satisfied.

That's how i read it personally. Just a man so starved for affection he ended up desiring the only type of release he could get to the point of pushing it to its extremes.

"sex is his love language" and i say it with all the possible tragedy there is.

#see if we were talking about Fediel. sex is a love language because it's a communion between souls #if we were taking Fediel's pov the interest in sex would be honestly all positive #and even for characters like Hekate who don't have any romantic side to their love for sex #they don't have this tragic subtext of this starvation #for Fediel and Hekate 'sex is their love language' could be just that without any type of tragedy on the side #but for belial? when we're speaking about him? oooh boy does it get messy #those tags are here to clarify that i don't think sex is inherently a twisted way to look for affection #but that it's especially the case in reading Belial's character #ichareply #ichafantalks gbf #anonymous #long post for ts

[icharchivist]

It makes sense that Parade's Lust is the Horny Song, since it's Belial being Belial and that Morning Light Hymnus is the dramatic love ballad because we established that Avatar eats Belial's horny filter and leaves him exposed

So he only really shares the depths of his romantic love when he has no other choice and there's no more horny to hide behind, since he can't keep up the facade with Avatar there

EXACTLYYYY too in pain to be able to keep up the charade of every coping mechanisms he has established to keep himself together. Just the raw desperation of wanting to be Lucilius's one and only.

Ofc it's the pain and everything mostly acting on it but i wonder also how much the fact Avatar was Lucilius's most anticipated creation may also act on Belial being more desperate. Like, "look, i've became the thing you have spent centuries trying to build up. I've taken in the power of your masterpiece. Will you finally pay attention to me?"

the latest moment of desperation that he cannot be loved by Lucilius just by being himself, so maybe, just maybe, if he takes in Lucilius's beloved creation in him, even if it kills him, maybe Lucilius will pay attention to him?

and of course, he doesn't.

It's just sad man.

#ichareply #anonymous #ichafantalks gbf

[icharchivist]

do you ever think about the line "its hard to describe the million nights without you" from morning light hymnus?

because one million nights translates to 2739,726 years and knowing belial already spent roughly 2000 years without lucilius already, so more than two thirds of those million nights and further knowing he didnt sleep to avoid getting caught so those 2000 years felt twice as long...

I feel bad for him. :(

how dare you come in my askbox to hurt me with math.

But man yeah D: that does put all this time into perspective. He must have felt so lonely. Like, heartstabbingly lonely.

I could imagine him not sleeping because drifting out to sleep would just have him face the loneliness he could try to push away from his mind when awake.

(honestly wouldn't be surprised he started to have one night stand as a way to get his mind out of it)

it's just :( very sad. Tragic little man.

#ichareply #anonymous #ichafantalks gbf