#I just... listen I don't have a problem with Tswift being on there | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

anothermansjeans · 1 year

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idk how you feel about songfics but i’m obsessed w tswift’s dbatc rn and i’m just thinking about spencer reid having a secret relationship that he leaves bc he’s afraid his so will be killed by an unsub but his so is like a local singer and garcias a huge fan and is like omg this song is so beautiful and sad happy ending or angst ending doesn’t matter i just think that song encompasses how i would feel if i loved and lost reid sorry for rambling anywayyy

i am a woman on a mission and ik you just requested this but as soon as i saw it i got immediate inspo

i also have a hotch x reader fic called death by a thousand cuts BUT i had to do this one as well 🫶 also i’m so sorry if it’s shit i’m so tired lmaoooo

I Can’t Pretend It’s Okay When It’s Not

spencer reid x fem!reader

When Penelope gushed about a local musician she absolutely adores playing at the cafe she visits frequently and forced the entirety of the BAU team to tag along, she forgot to mention what Spencer would deem the most important piece of information— her name.

At first, when they walked into the coffee shop already a couple songs in due to the team's later arrival (much to Penelope’s dismay), Spencer wasn’t completely aware of the angelic voice completing beautiful melodies. His main focus being on getting coffee into his system asap, while he was up at the counter, he tuned it out almost completely— again, almost. The moment he heard her speak was a completely different story.

“Um, so this is a new song…” the woman on the small five inch high stage started, “I actually wrote it a couple weeks ago after a very… difficult time in my life… a time I’m still actually going through, but I hope you guys have it in your heart to give it a listen with open minds. This is Death by a Thousand Cuts.”

Spencer slowly walked back over to the team, eyes wide and fixed on the woman he believes is the love of his life. The only problem being he has no right to call her his anymore.

Soft strumming of the guitar began, with low my’s being sung, and he heard a soft gasp come from his left. “Oh, this is gonna hurt,” Penelope said, one hand placed on her chest while the other hugged around her body.

“Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts

Flashbacks waking me up

I get drunk, but it's not enough

'Cause the morning comes and you're not my baby

I look through the windows of this love

Even though we boarded them up

Chandelier's still flickering here

'Cause I can't pretend it's ok when it's not

It's death by a thousand cuts”

Not even a minute in and Spencer feels as though he’s been stabbed through the heart. It’s difficult hearing it from her perspective. When he made the decision to end what they had, it was out of protection— it was so that she wouldn’t have to deal with the burdens of his job.

“I dress to kill my time

I take the long way home

I ask the traffic lights if it'll be all right

They say, "I don't know"

And what once was ours is no one's now

I see you everywhere

The only thing we share

Is this small town”

“You said it was a great love

One for the ages

But if the story's over

Why am I still writing pages?”

Spencer thinks back to their love story, back to when it began and the blissful moments, the rendezvous’, and the unasked questions about why they only ever had real dates inside and why no one on the team or anyone with any semblance of importance in Spencer’s life knew of them.

He thinks back to how happy she was, and how she was content with just being with him. How when her eyes lit up the first time he said he loved her, but also the dim the second he ended things.

He thinks about the nightmares he thought were over. How instead of Maeve being the victim it was now her. How if it wasn’t for those nightmares, the onslaught of “what-if’s” wouldn’t plague his mind. How if he had a less dangerous job, a job that didn’t take every ounce of life or happiness out of him, he would and could still be with her.

And as he thinks of these things, he suddenly becomes aware of the blazing eyes that had locked with his, and a tiny gasp is heard from the microphone before she starts playing with more vigor.

“My heart, my hips, my body, my love

Trying to find a part of me that you didn't touch

Gave up on me like I was a bad drug

Now I'm searching for signs in a haunted club

Our songs, our films, united we stand

Our country, guess it was a lawless land

Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand

Paper cut stings from our paper thin plans”

It hurt. So much. And it was clear it wasn’t only him because each word she sang was aimed to puncture him. The tears brimming in her eyes were also evident. To anyone else, her words are curated from past

memories from someone who hurt her, but to Spencer, it was a message. A message that every single part of their relationship was taken into account while writing this song. A message that everything they’ve ever said or done had been tainted with the memory of him leaving her with no explanation.

“My time, my wine, my spirit, my trust

Trying to find a part of me you didn't take up

Gave you too much but it wasn't enough

But I'll be all right, it's just a thousand cuts”

He watches as she screws her eyes shut, and the sharpness of her words becomes duller as she sings on. He knew he fucked up the moment he walked out of her apartment the night he ended it, but he has never regretted it more than now. He misses her. He misses smiles, the laughter, the unconditional love that radiates from her. He would do anything to get that back.

He doesn’t realize he’s standing there, staring at her in awe mixed with sadness until applause is heard throughout the cafe and Penelope lets out a small “so sad and and beautiful,” while wiping under her eyes. He also doesn’t realize that after she announces a small break that he was walking up to her in a daze, the entire team behind him eyes wide with shock.

He also doesn't realize the first words he speaks to her are what they both longed to hear between the two for weeks.

“I miss you so much.”

She’s shocked to say the least. She’s completely speechless to the point where he begins to speak again due to the lack of words on her side.

“I’m an idiot— I’m, I’m so stupid. You’d think with an IQ of 187 I would be able to not make decisions like leaving the one woman I love the most in the world. Y/N, I swear I thought I was keeping you safe because with me and my job, that’s not always a guarantee, but listening to you and what you’re going through, I can’t— I know it wasn’t the right thing to do—”

“Spencer,” she finally cut him off, placing her hand on his arm and shifting her eyes to the people behind him who had been standing with him. “Later, okay? You can tell me everything later when we aren’t surrounded by a bunch of people.” The look in her eyes was genuine, but there was still hurt swimming in them. He wanted to say something, anything to ease it, but before he could open his mouth she grabbed the acoustic guitar and gave him a small smile. “And I miss you too,” she said before walking back up on the small platform and adjusting her mic.

While introducing her next song, Spencer slowly made his way back to the group who were going to ask the inevitable questions, but that didn’t stop the small smile from making its way to his lips, and he thought that maybe, just maybe, they won’t have to pretend to be okay anymore.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #dr spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #anne marie answers

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georgianadarcies · 3 years

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Also, let's talk about the dumb delusionality of it all when rogans try to claim that every TSwift song is for their ship. Unless y'all are strictly counting the ones where the guy is an obvious asshole, you can't claim the ones that are superbly romantic when they're also the complete opposite of who Logan is. "Lover" can't even fit for him because a) he had no problem throwing it in Rory's face that she isn't paying any rent while living in HIS apartment, so where exactly does "this is our place, we make the rules" even fit here? When your boyfriend is trying to shut you down in an argument he started in the first place? and b) unless you were to count it from his perspective in season 7 when he tried to get them to move away together, "can I go where you go?" can't even fit because Rory LIKES and wants to stay where she is in season 6/season 7 and closer to her family. And don't even get me started on "magnetic force of a man", the only magnetic force Logan as is his money, otherwise Rory has more magnetism in her left pinky. Sorry he can't be her 🤷‍♀️

there are plenty of taylor songs that fit rogan, they're just picking the wrong ones! for example, they can feel free to claim should've said no: "and I should've been there in the back of your mind / I shouldn't be asking myself, 'why?' / you shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet" "baby, you know all the right things to say / but do you honestly expect me to believe / we could ever be the same?" "you say that the past is the past, you need one chance / it was a moment of weakness and you said, 'yes.'"

or white horse!! there are some very rogan-esque lyrics there! "say you're sorry, that face of an angel / comes out just when you need it to / as I paced back and forth all this time / 'cause I honestly believed in you / holdin' on, the days drag on / stupid girl, I shoulda known, I shoulda known" "maybe I was naive, got lost in your eyes / and never really had a chance / my mistake, I didn't know to be in love / you had to fight to have the upper hand / I had so many dreams about you and me / happy endings, now I know."

tell me why also works: "you could write a book on how to ruin someone's perfect day / well, I get so confused and frustrated / forget what I'm trying to say." and you're not sorry: "you're looking so innocent, I might believe you if I didn't know / could've loved you all my life if you hadn't left me waiting in the cold / and you've got your share of secrets / and I'm tired of being last to know / but now you're asking me to listen cause its worked each time before."

dear john, too, with the "you are an expert at sorry / and keeping lines blurry" which is just... so very logan. I knew you were trouble, hell, they can even have hoax! see, they're just looking in the wrong places.

#ask #anonymous #anti rogan

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