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litakino · 3 years

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Yesterday was the 10th anniversary of Rose's death. Also, this November she would've been 30y/o.

She was a close friend of mine, and died of an aneurysm; she collapsed on stage while singing and playing the guitar, and died the next day.

Rose was the same age as my sister, two years younger than me, and her sister is my age and was my best friend. So the four of us were really close, almost like sisters. We would spend the summer holidays either with our family, or theirs, whichever family went to the beach that year.

She was such a big part of my life growing up, that it's weird thinking that she's "stuck" at 20, and I'm 32 now.

I'll try really hard to convey, how important she is to everyone who knew her. How missed she is.

She was so smart, like book smart, but also surprisingly insightful for a 20y/o.

I remember Rose telling me once "I wanted to know if I liked it, so I kissed a girl. But it's not for me". You have no idea how important that was for me. Like I've never even thought of the possibility of not being straight (raised catholic and very conservative), it's not that I was repressed, it was just something I never even considered before.

And she was from a family very much like mine, but able to break away and try her own path (it wasn't that she went around kissing people; and there's nothing wrong with being that person, but she just wasn't, I'm saying this to illustrate how important it was that she did it).

Rose also loved things with all her being. And she was never ashamed of the things she liked. Like she would go into forums and investigate about her heroes and know all there was to know about ER and Sarah McLachlan and Rent and U2 and musicals and Broadway and Wicked.

I'm writing because there's so much she would've done, so many what-ifs I feel I need to make her be present this way, this year.

She wasn't top of her class when she graduated high school, just because she didn't want to spend too much time studying. She was close second though, and that was just with minimal effort. She was a real life Hermione.

Also, Rose was tall, and big, and had long bushy hair. She had to buy her heels from drag queen shops bc her feet were so big, "regular" shoe shops didn't carry her size. And she was CONFIDENT. Like, loved to wear her hair down, big and all, no shits given.

And was really good at shopping for cool clothes, even though most traditionally "feminine" shops didn't carry her size (take into consideration, this was 2009/2010 and we grew up in a small city in Argentina, there weren't many shops available, and "plus size" meant grandma's clothes)

Her last birthday (2010) she rocked a really short shirt-dress with bright yellow tights, I can't even begin to imagine what her style might have been nowadays.

It took her some time to gain that confidence, went through the awkward baggy-pants-and-big-sweatshirt phase like most of us fat girls, but she already loved herself when she was finishing high school. It took me many more years to reach that stage.

I'm painting the best picture, since everything positive about her comes to mind these days.

That's not to say, she was perfect. She definitely wasn't. She was human and made mistakes and (I'm sure) hurt people.

She was loud and could be obnoxious sometimes, but there are very few teenagers and young adults who aren't.

Oh also, Rose really enjoyed singing. And she was really good at it.

She was studying to become an English teacher.

She was really spiritual, and sang in church every Sunday, and was part of the community.

I would love to speak to her now, about feminism and love and gender and sexuality and family. There's so much we didn't know back then, so much I want her insight into.

When I heard the Hamilton soundtrack, all I could think about was about her. And how much she would've loved it.

I want to have the opportunity to hear her rave about things like Lin Manuel Miranda, or Doctor Who, or Good Omens.

I'm glad Rose got to meet my (now) husband, and that she liked him is an endorsement like very few I can think of.

I wonder where she would be living now (I think Ireland or England, studying for her third master and singing in pubs some nights).

I know she would have finally found someone who saw her for who she was, and loved her for it. Perhaps a few whirlwind romances before that.

I wonder if she would've even wanted to have kids.

When Rose died, it was a shock, because no one saw it coming (both her parents are doctors, and the aneurysm was never diagnosed, she never had any syntoms before. And by the time she was rushed into the hospital, it was too late).

Afterwards, slowly but surely, all of her friends and family finished high school, then university. Some of us got married, some got kids. Some moved to other countries.

The year she died, I was out of the country, doing one of those work and travel programs, that encompass our summer (December through March), in WDW. It was something she had actually suggested, that she wanted to do, but last minutes backed out (I never knew why). I was far away from home, working 13-hour shifts (the holidays in the resort are madness). And after her death, a friend suggested some of us took the days off from two weeks, put them together, and take a 4-days trip to NYC. I didn't really have the money to do it, but said yes anyways because Rose wanted to attend Juilliard (childhood dreams), and so we said we were going to visit her in her break (more childhood dreaming). So I ended up eating rice and crackers for a few weeks in order to pay for travel and lodging, but it was so worth it. Everything there reminded me of her, of what she dreamed of doing, of becoming.

I miss her so much, and as I go through life and hit new "milestones", I wonder what she would be doing right now.

Yesterday some close friends and her family gathered (socially distant, and out in the open air) in our old high school. It's a place of 400 square meters, most of which are various sports' fields, and a small forest. It was a place she felt was home, and since the moment she said she wanted to become an English teacher, a spot was there waiting for her to finish her studies.

Anyways, there in the small forest, around the fallen walnut tree, people who loved her, and miss her, gathered, to remember her smiles and jokes and songs.

Her mother read a poem Rose wrote, and her sister sang the solo in "Seasons of Love".

It was lovely, and sad, and had her in every moment.

She is loved, and missed so so much.

#Spotify

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clayfaced · 4 years

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POSITIVE 20 QUESTIONS TAG GAME

ily @hopeisthewholepoint i was doing this a while ago and then the draft didn’t save so this is about 30 years late by now whopps. ily thanks for tagging me tho. ❤

1. Name 4 fictional characters who showcase your personality the best, with explanations if you want.

My girl Edrisa Tanaka from Prodigal Son bc we’re both socially awkward but at least she’s unapologetic about it. I want to say I have Sam Wilson’s humor and I too do what everyone else does just slower. Raymond Holt because I love fluffy bois and I’m down to fight anyone who says anything bad about my pets. Ben Wyatt because we’re both human disasters and I like making dumb stuff when I’m bored.

2. Aesthetic

Playing pool terribly with friends, peanut butter and banana sandwiches, colorful rain jackets. Balloons, music playing from car radios, collecting movie ticket stubs. Painted nails, open windows, and fish stamps on postcards. The smell of fresh basil.

3. Favorite musical/play? (If you’ve never seen a musical or play, one you’d be interested in seeing?)

Come from Away. Hands down. Though I will say I saw recordings of the National Theater’s Frankensteins recently and both are very good but the Miller-as-the-creature version is especially good.

4. What is the best compliment you’ve ever received?

Okay this is a bit of an unfair question bc I die at any and all compliments. But one that I thought of today /a couple days ago/ a long time ago when i started writing this that made me happy again was when someone I'm in a club with let me borrow his camera to take pictures during a performance. I hadn't taken pictures in a while and I had so much fun and I don't really contribute to the club so I finally felt like I had purpose. It was hard to see how they came out on the camera but the next time I saw him he said they came out really well and someone else said that he's normally picky when it comes to photos but he liked mine so that made me feel even better and it was overall a very nice time. It wasn't even really the compliment (I mean, it still was but) it was also just the gesture to offer a camera when he heard I liked taking pictures. I didn't have my camera with me until after this and it really made me remember how much I liked it. Anyways he graduated and hasn't been in the club since last semester so I never see him but it made me v happy.

5. How many times have you been in love?

Miss me with that romantic love but I fall in love with friends and people and every little thing everyday.

6. Embarrassing story or fact about yourself that makes you laugh now?

Bold of you to assume I've recovered from anything embarrassing ever.

This is a bit of a cheat bc it was always funny but my middle school PE uniforms had words and definitions on the back of the shirts (no i don’t know why) and mine said “final: adj. last in place” or something like that and you know what? it was RIGHT.

7. Favorite Disney/Pixar movie?

Probably Up. Idk I don’t really have one.

8. Favorite flower or plant?

Probably triostar plants because they’re cute and pink.

9. What’s your favorite holiday?

Halloween 🎃! I love the idea that kids are going bonkers and getting candy and having a good time. And I love that it gives not-children people a chance to dress up and have fun and take themselves less seriously for a day.

EDIT: NO ONE TOLD ME I MISSED QUESTIONS 10-14. NO ONE LOOK AT THIS .LOOK AWAY. IM FIXING IT. HOW DID I MISS FIVE WHOLE ENTIRE QUESTIONS. SMH.

10. Name three things that made you laugh or smile this past week.

This meme dee just sent me a minute ago. I had a socially-distant dinner with a couple of my friends whomst I love a lot on Saturday and it was very nice to see their beautiful faces in person again and I love them a lot. Time isn’t real I don’t know what happened this week. I set up the Xbox again and I’ve played a little little bit of Assassins Creed (which Im very bad at) and Skyrim (which im only a little bad at) and that’s been fun. Bonus answer of dee, nina, and I have been watching 911: Lone Star together and it’s v v fun.

11. What song would you play to introduce yourself to someone?

That is way too hard of a question to definitively answer. My music taste varies so wildly and my favorite song is usually the one I've obsessively listened to the last. Using that logic: Bang! by AJR or Wake Me by Bleachers. Or Chris Martin’s cover of Shelter from the Storm by Bob Dylan. Yeah. The last one.

12. Name something that truly makes you feel peaceful even at your most stressed moments.

Being a passenger in a car with music playing though that doesn’t really happen when I’m stressed. I wouldn’t say peaceful because when I’m not good at that when I’m stressed and most of the time when I’m stressed I have too much stress inside of me so I would rather get it out than be peaceful. So I just put earbuds in and listen to music too loudly so I don’t have to hear anything around me and I can just sort of release all pent up energy with the music and calm down.

13. What do you, did you, or would you study at college?

I’m studying film! I’m technically undeclared but I’m hoping to declare soon. :-). Yes I’m going to be unemployed and leech off of dee for the rest of our lives thanks for asking.

14. This is kind of a weird one, but which outfit of yours makes you feel most like yourself?

Um. Definitely sneakers (by default my white ones because I only have one pair) because I like being able to Move. Same reason for my black pants bc they’re not restricting at all and comfy. And then probably my gray sweatshirt which dee will murder me for saying bc it means I have zero (0) colors in my outfit but it comfy. I like having colors but I feel more comfortable in more neutral colors.

15. What is a quote you live by?

Oof oof I don’t know. I think there are a lot of quotes I want to live by and then I forget about them so if I am living by a specific quote, it’s not consciously. I reblog a lot I like to my words tag or text tag, and this one:

“‘Do you fall in love often?’ Yes often. With a view, with a book, with a dog, a cat, with numbers, with friends, with complete strangers, with nothing at all.” (Jeanette Winterson)

explains me very well. I don’t know that it’s something I live by because it’s just a state of my existence but it me.

16. Name the funniest playlist name you have.

I wish I had funnier playlist names. One of them is living room couch alone for a very specific mood when it's after 10 o'clock and everyone else is asleep and I'm in the living room alone on the couch and I'm not tired and time doesn't feel real. It's a good mood. I also have one called new york times which isn't funny I just like it.

17. Make a reference to an inside joke you have with someone you love with zero context.

“you know why we do this?" *snap with one hand* "because we can’t always get our arms free to do this” *dramatic arching snap with both hands*

But that one’s not with dee ( @mrrmiracle ) so give me one sec to think of something else too. Ok here we go:

"that Andrew Garfield movie"

18. What is a message you would give your younger self if given the chance?

Stop overthinking and start doing. You can’t sit at home sad your friends aren’t hanging out with you if you never ask them to hang out. Initiate things. Its not as scary as it seems. Also for the love of all things holy please form good habits now. Form all the good habits I have none and I’m tired.

19. Who is your favorite family member? (If you have no good blood family members, feel free to mention someone in your found family)

um my cats :// im just kidding it’s @mrrmiracle obviously.

20. What’s a secret dream of yours?

Um lol to not be alone. To be employed doing something I enjoy and make enough money to support myself. If I put lol will this sound less sad.

I’m tagging @mrrmiracle, @grayson-dick @valleydean and @daredeviil and if anyone else wants to do it just say i tagged you and i’ll edit it to include you 👀. i just get anxious tagging people bc i don’t want to annoy people and i never know who wants to be tagged or not.

#thanks for tagging me!!#ilu nina #tag game #you dont have to do it if i tag you obviously i just didn't know who to tag #uhh lemme know if you do or dont like being tagged and i'll continue or stop tagging you #not fandom

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sweetwriting · 7 years

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Tim Drake Positivity Week -Day 4: Funny or Serious

Category: Gen

Genre: Humor/Fluff/Angst/Family

Fandoms: DC Comics, Batverse, Superverse

Continuity : Post-Crisis/Pre-Flashpoint referenced. Rebirth

Summary: Family is a tricky matter in those parts and it's especially true for people who were gone from the world for so long. (featuring Jon, Clark and Conner)

Word Count: 4 979

AN: I'm very late because while this piece has been finished for like a month, I didn't have time to write it on my computer so its posting has been delayed and I apologize (I was already late because it got away from me and started getting long. I had to cut some parts).

This is part of my own version of Tim Drake's come back in the DC Rebirth Plot which I've been working on and planning for, for about a year and a half now. Since I kind of loath Tynion's take on his character...I mean people talk about Lobdell but Tynion worsened everything like 100 times and at least Lobdell admitted to his fault when he created his first Origin Story by saying it wasn't Tim Drake... they literally had everything on a silver platter and they decided to throw it out. It's ridiculous I'm telling you. I still haven't read A Lonely Place of Living, I'm waiting until next Thursday to read it all at once partially because Tynion's writing feels so bland -mostly bc his notion of character development is using timeskips and because he's told a fan he considered Rebirth!Tim to be the same as preboot!Tim and it scared me more than anything because he's exactly the same as N52!Tim- partially because I didn't want to have to wait for a story I had 99% chances of disliking because of the issues I mentioned in the tags and here (or as Shawn Spencer said in Psych, "Just 'cause you put syrup on somethin', don't make it pancakes").

ANYWAY, this happens during my AU which I promise I will start posting some time in November. It kind of gives away a part of it but at the same time, it's something that's so obvious it's not really given away (especially if you've read some of my Tumblr posts). The point of the other fic being "how does it get to this point?".

To read it on AO3

Finally! It was time. Jon had been waiting for this for months (well three months). Which was when Kon-El/Conner had come back to the land of livings...or Earth. True he hadn’t been thrilled to learn about Jon’s existence at first -more the opposite actually- apparently because he and his dad had had issues? And Jon being the new Superboy or something. On top of which there had been the Tim Drake and Bart Allen cases to deal with which prevent any of the older Super’s issues to be solved. But Conner had warmed up to him and now Jon was allowed to spend his Week-End at his place. In Ca.li.for.nia!

Now Jon had gotten used to Metropolis (his self from three months ago would have killed him for it) but the sun of Metropolis wasn’t as agreeable as the one of their old town? And definitely not as nice as the one in California!

He was also finally going to really meet Damian’s “lost” brother whom he had nicknamed the “real” Tim Drake (not to be mean to the other Tim but Witness Protection program and all that Jazz made it his fake name).

So Jon was really excited. His dad was coming down the stairs now, so he could fly him over (Jon still had trouble controlling his power of flight). Jon had just kissed his mom goodbye and was literally jumping to the ceiling in excitement.

“Conner, if you keep pacing like this you’re going to leave a trail on the ground.” Conner stopped. He turned to his right to look at Tim who was reading something on his tablet, comfortably settled on the couch, lounging in jeans and T-shirt, a look Conner was still trying to get used to. Not that Tim had never worn those before, it simply hadn’t been a common sight. He tried to glare at him but the panicked look in his eyes and seemingly emanating from every pore of his skin made him look more like a scared puppy than anything else.

“You don’t get it Tim. You didn’t completely mess up with your younger brother!”

Tim looked up from his Tablet, stared at Conner for a few seconds while raising his eyebrows. It was quite obviously meant to be taken as a “seriously?” and When had Tim learned to do that? And from who? Okay, that question was easily answered. It was probably Alfred.

“I meant as a first meeting! You tried to welcome Damian while I basically just had a small fit like a spoiled brat.”

Great. He was pouting now. Tim sighed and put his tablet on the coffee table next to him. Conner sighed as well and went to sit on it so he could face Tim.

“Look I understand you’re stressed out but it’s quite clear that the kid is ready to forgive you…Plus you had extenuating circumstances…you know with the “mixed memories” and the “having just woken up in a tube” things. And you’re great with kids. Remember Traya, she could make you do anything just by looking at you? You’ll be awkward at first and then you two will be planning my doom”. He paused, seemingly deep in thoughts. “Now that I think about it, I should probably be the one to worry. I mean your little brother or nephew or cousin or whatever is friends with Damian.”

Conner snorted and looked at Tim, now a lot calmer.

“Please. I’m pretty sure you’d be able to tell if he was planning something, he’s not very sneaky”. He paused, breathing deeply. ”Okay, I’m feeling a little better now. Thanks, Wonder Boy.”

He clapped him on the knee as Tim started to smile at him. Both started when the doorbell rang and Tim saw Conner stiffen. Seeing as the meta was starting to panic again, Tim got up first, quickly followed by Conner, and answered the door. He couldn’t help the smile that grew on his face as he saw the new Superboy bouncing on the ball of his feet. He would have smiled anyway (he wasn’t the social butterfly of the Batfam for no reason after all) but at least now it was completely genuine.

“Hey, Clark, Jon, welcome.”

Jon beamed up at him and bit his lower lip as Clark had settled his hands on his shoulders, probably to prevent his son from accidentally showing his powers to their neighbors. Tim moved to his right so they could come in, closed the door and turned to see Conner awkwardly trying to start a conversation. Jon looked at them, in boredom or disbelief, Tim wasn’t sure. So he walked toward him, leaving both “older” Kryptonians (and damn, Conner was younger than his younger brother) trying to avoid the elephant in the room as he addressed Jon.

“Hey, do you want me to show you your room while these two shuffle awkwardly?”

Jon looked at him with pure relief in his eyes and replied with said relief seeping through his words.

“Yes please” He paused “Wait.” He looked between Conner and Tim “I get my own room?”

Conner, who had been glaring at Tim along with Clark, nodded at slowly, taken aback by the kid’s excitement but a smile started to grow because of it. He was definitely a cute kid. Now the point of this Week-End was to find the personality hidden underneath all the cuteness and see if they had a chance of getting along even outside of the vigilante field. Tim had been right when he had told him, a few days after being back, that Conner needed a family outside of the Teen Titans. Something more stable that didn’t rely on a roster and Tim himself was looking for his own place within the Bats or…How had he said it again? “I’d help you by lending you mine but I’m not sure what it entails right now”. And of course they had each other but Conner was sure Tim meant “aside from each other”. He used to have Ma (and Pa for a short time) but he was barely starting acclimating to them when he died and he had finally (relatively) gotten used to it, having a stable family life when those world-changing event happened. There had been that first year in Hawaï with Roxy, Tana, Dubbilex and Rex but “stable” wasn’t the word he’d use to describe that time (still the closest he had for about two years)…And well he did miss Clark and Steel (and Kara and Matrix but…). And Okay, he had never really thought about having siblings. He already had Roxy and Bart and the kids from Cadmus but the idea was appealing even if, technically, Jon would be his nephew? What did you call the child of your cousin? Now that he thought about it was his cover still that of Clark’s cousin? Or was he his brother now? His son? No. He was brought back to that first time of awareness in this new world and shuddered so briefly that only Clark had noticed it. The fact that Tim had apparently lead Jon to his room and left them to their own devices while Conner was daydreaming might have helped in that. Clark who was now lifting an eyebrow, demanding an explanation for Conner’s mind’s wandering. Nice to know Clark was still the king of righteousness. Conner sighed and replied to Clark’s silent probing.

“It’s nothing, something just reminded me of the tube I woke up in. Which got me thinking, are we gonna use the same “I’m your cousin" I.D?”

Clark cleared his throat having been clearly hoping he’d be able to avoid the topic or maybe he was just that awkward with him.

“Actually, Lois and I were thinking that since, uh, you’re not 21 yet, and Ma’s not here anymore”, he paused. Both Kents feeling the weight of her loss in their heart, she was much better at dealing with these family matters than either of them. Conner should have stayed with her. He wanted nothing more than to have stayed with her –with Tim while he sorted through his own family matters of course. But she was gone. And he had to get used to that fact. Apparently, all his parental figures had died while he was “asleep” or whatever had happened to him. Clark’s voice broke him out of his thoughts. “We thought we could be your legal guardians with me being your big brother. It’d be a little hard to explain your existence any other way without making up a whole different family tree.” He paused again. He had started to gain a good rhythm but it seemed like it wasn't easy. Clark was more used to forcing his will on Conner (even if he had gotten better at talking to him over time…Clark still wasn’t Ma Kent and the thought almost had him panicking. He tried to control his breath again -his meeting with Parallax and Sinestro not yet forgotten- and continued. Conner’s little frown didn’t help). “I meant that we would have to create a new mother and where you’d have lived before coming to Smallville -you know how thorough Batman can be when he wants to- and I just thought that me becoming my younger brother’s legal guardian after the death of our Mother made more sense. It allows you to stay here and continue your studies, if you want to. But if you need anything you know my home is yours.” Clark stopped. He was starting to mumble. This situation, with Conner, had never been easy. He had barely started to hit his 30’s when Kon had first appeared. He was too young to have a teenage son (it didn’t help that the child in question was born because a creep stole his DNA to experiment on). Now he was hitting his 40’s and Conner had lost so many years, first with his own death then with the last world-altering nonsense (if only it was only those) and he hadn’t caught up, Conner was barely out of his teens and while Clark could now be a father. Their history got in the way and Conner had a confusing enough track record and putting a little “normalcy” and “stability” in his life had been one of his main reasons to have him live with Ma in the first place. And yet, things had gotten so messed up. He looked at the young man in front of him (because at virtually 19 that’s what he was now and if it that didn’t send a wave of regret…-for Conner’s missed childhood? For not helping him like he should have been helped in his first few years? For everything Conner missed while he was forced to not grow up (and there were too many times it had happened in his life)?- then what could?). Conner seemed startled. Clark didn’t know what exactly had startled him but then he grinned and held out his hand for Clark to shake and said:

“Deal.”

Of course, Clark wasn’t naïve enough to think Conner was perfectly okay with this but being given a chance was all he could ask for. And they smiled awkwardly at each other. Damn.

“Hey Tim, what’s the matter with dad and Conner?”

Jon had just finished putting his clothes in the dresser of his room under Tim’s watchful eyes –he felt lucky he had had to deal with Bart for years and learned to watch out for hyperactive-like kids. The question, while expected was not one Tim was keen on answering.

“It’s not really my place to say at this point. Maybe you try asking him tomorrow morning?”

That pout. Damn. Tim could definitely see the family traits. Though Conner’s always seemed a lot less innocent (to be fair he never looked like an 11 years old and he almost always had terrible ideas fueling them). On a side note, what were the chances Jon had listened in on the other two? Tim didn’t know him enough to actually utter a guess.

“Anyway, due to various time issues we weren’t sure what kids your age like but we thought Video Games was kind of a timeless thing and we’ve got tons of them. Cass has been filling our living room with books if it’s more your thing but Conner and I are more comic books people…There’s also my own training gear in my version of the “Batcave” if you want.”

Apparently, those were the right things to say to divert the child’s attention because he seemed ready to start jumping again (it was probably the mention of video games).

“You’ve got video games? Are they old? ‘Cause you’re old, you’re even older than Conner and you guys haven’t had a lot of time to adjust right?”

Tim felt the urge to cry in protest but had to remind himself of the kid’s age and managed to avoid snapping at him.

“We’ve got all kinds, remember one of us is a speedster so even if Conner and I hadn’t yet, he’s had the time to catch up”

“Cool! By the way, did you mean it when you said I could train in your…what did you call it again? Nest?”

Once again Tim was glad he had had to deal with Bart for a long while otherwise, he’s not sure he could have followed Jon’s babbling. He wondered vaguely if Conner would have acted in a similar way had he been given a chance to be 11. And the bad jokes…Was Superman as bad? He seemed to be from the little times they had interacted and from what Conner had told him (though that one seemed more like unreliable narration).

“I don’t call it anything other than HQ. Conner calls it a nest too though so you can do it.” He paused. “Just please don’t use it outside of this apartment”.

Jon tried to hold in a laugh (and quite obviously failed) before Tim ushered him back downstairs.

“C’mon let’s save those two from an awkwardness overload.”

As Conner closed the door behind his cousin. Wait. Brother. It felt weird. He turned to his best friend and to the kid who apparently was his nephew now.

“So…This is finally over.”

He felt his phone vibrate in his back pocket and he felt his cheeks heat up as he read the message he had just received: “I heard that you know.” Tim and Jon looked at each other questioningly but seemed to decide not to pry (if only because they had already guessed what had happened, Jon himself having been on the receiving hand of his father’s hearing quite a few times). Conner tried to ignore them as he started walking to the kitchen.

“Alright, it’s time to eat!”

Tim’s deadpan voice came from where he and Jon and stayed, making him stop in his track:

“Conner it’s barely 6. How about we spend some downtime together”

Conner’s cheeks turned pink. in his hurry to forget what had happened with Clark he had forgotten pretty much everything else that was going on. He took a sudden turn to the right, toward the living room as he exclaimed:

“Video Games it is.”

Tim sighed and mumbled something about how it was lucky Jon was part of a video games generation and they had already decided it was going to be their next activity or the night would have started badly.

“Right, turn on the Switch, we still have the last sonic game to play and it’s ideal when we have guests”.

Tim snorted as he approached his best friend who had paused in the doorway, patting him on the back as he took his wrist to lead him toward the various video game stations they had. He turned to John.

“C’mon, want to help me destroy his sorry ass?”

“Tim! Don’t talk like that! Clark’s never gonna forgive me if we talk that way in front of his kid!”

Conner was starting to panic, and Tim felt sorry for him. That he was so stressed out about something as simple as…What was wrong exactly with what he had said? He looked at Conner Questioningly.

“You realize you’re not supposed to use words like “ass” in front of a kid, right?”

Tim’s eyes turned slightly vacant. He had, in fact, not known that.

“Oh.”

He turned toward Jon who, annoyed, was grumbling about not being a kid.

“Sorry Jon, I had no idea Conner had become a proper adult. You shall now only refer to him for adult matters. He’s the responsible one”.

Tim had left Conner’s side to set up the console with Jon while his friend was still shell-shocked. Conner was fuming, and he started to raise his arms in frustration.

“It’s not funny Tim! You know how much is riding on this!”

Tim stopped for a second and signed for Jon to keep taking out the console. He got up and walked toward Conner setting his hands gently on his right shoulder and forearm so Conner would drop his arms. He did, forcing Tim to drop his hands and turned to face Tim whose left hand had replaced his right one on Conner’s right shoulder as the other settled on the left side of his neck, hoping he could get his best friend to look him in the eye so he could try to ground him and avoid what he knew was going to turn into a sour mood.

“Hey, it’s okay Conner. Jon’s 11 so I doubt he’s never heard the word before that and he probably knows not to use this kind of language in front of his parents. And you’re stressing yourself too much this is just a mise-en-bouche.”

He stopped for a second, making sure Conner was looking into his eyes “But I promise I’ll make an effort” He patted his friend’s neck and put his hands back to his side and started to walk back toward the consoles. “C’mon let’s get defeated by your brother…Nephew...whichever.”

Conner caught up to him in a few tranquil strokes (being taller than Tim had its advantages and reminding him of the fact was one of them).

“Apparently, it’s Nephew, I’m Clark’s little brother now. Also you might get defeated but that’s because you su- I mean you’re awful at those kinds of Video Games.”

Tim was smiling. He knew it. He may not have been able to see it but he could feel Tim’s wry smile. It was there. Because not two minutes ago he had been pani- no he had been lecturing Tim about his language and he almost had a slip up himself. But Tim seemed to feel magnanimous enough not to mention it…yet.

They had been playing for about an hour and Jon had, in fact, kicked their asses. Conner would probably feel less sulky if Tim hadn’t gotten the best of him too.

He was starting to pout (glare. He was glaring at them) when Tim interrupted the game to say they should prepare their snacks-dinner and to join him once he was done taking the ingredients out. Conner wondered what it could be since they didn’t have much more than pasta ingredients and it wasn’t really “snack-dinner” worthy…Unless…Nah Tim wouldn’t show this side of them to a new guest…Would he?

Anyway, Tim had been in the middle of the couch, between the two Supers and feeling him slip away had Conner almost latching onto his arm and beg him to stay with them when the older teen threw him a look that meant “He’s here so you guys could bond, I’ve been playing the mediator for the past hour and a half, it’s time to deal with your shit”. Okay, so maybe Conner was reading a little more into this and the look just meant “grow a pair”, or “grow up”. The point of the message was still the same.

And damn, it was probably gonna be awkward. What if it was as awkward as when he talked to Clark but this time he would be in Clark’s shoes? This is a terrible ending. What if…

“Tim’s really cool! You’re lucky he was your Robin. I have to deal with Damian. I mean, we get along better (way better) than we did months ago but he’s still a pain. Tim was probably a thousand time more fun to deal with! I mean he’s already much more fun to deal with than most of the other bats even if he’s old.”

Conner looked at the new Superboy, mouth slightly open at having been interrupted in his internal freakout. He couldn’t help but laugh, both at Jon’s conclusion and in relief, startling the kid.

“Oh, Believe me, Tim wasn’t fun or even funny back then. Well…He still isn’t funny. His jokes are awful. He was our leader you know, so he felt responsible for our lives. Plus back then there was the secret identity issue. It frustrated me a lot. Back then we…We didn’t get along actually. In a different way from you and Damian because we wanted to be friends but the circumstances got in the way and pushed us apart. It was quite complicated if I’m being honest. Way more than I realized back then”.

He paused looking at his hands. He had loved that time; when they were all pretty innocent even if some of the most tragic moments of their lives happened during that very period of time : Tana’s death, Guardian’s, Gotham turning into a No Man’s Land, Bruce being accused of murder and going awry, the first time the gap between Tim and Steph really made itself known, Cissie almost killing someone, one of Bart’s clones dying…Apokolips in general…, among others. He really missed the innocence they had before all those events started accumulating. On the other hand, and he knew it was selfish of him considering all the hurt that was needed to get there and how much it caused afterwards, he wouldn’t give up the depth it had given to his and Tim’s friendship for anything in the world, with maybe the exception of Tim having a happy life. He looked up at the kid beside him, hoping he wouldn’t have to go through half as much as he did (but he had Clark and Lois and there was a better support system for young Heroes so he was already off to a better start than Kon had been, and he’d make sure to help keep it that way). He had to take a deep breath as nostalgia took hold of his heart. Because despite everything he had just thought, he wished the evolution of his and Tim’s relationship hadn’t happened at the expense of their innocence and he felt terrible at being responsible for such a big part of Tim’s own. Whether during the war or when he died. He was brought back to reality by Jon hovering next to his arm, looking slightly worried. Conner tried to recompose himself as he continued:

“What I mean is that we had to go through many trials for Tim –and the rest of us really- to learn, and re-learn to have fun and stop being so serious all the time. Now that Tim’s not needed in Gotham, he’s free to be more…at ease I guess…That and he’s trying to make us more...content I guess, so we would have less of a chance to end up like his family.”

He watched Jon grimace and mutter a small “yeah no kidding” and he winked at the kid. He was starting to truly like him. But he felt it was time to join Tim, after all –and despite what Tim himself might think- he needed to bond with Jon almost as much as Conner did.

They both got up as Conner ushered the young hero toward the kitchen which they found filled with recipients and when Conner started smelling it, all he could do was stop abruptly and say:

“Wait a second. Cheese? Potatoes. More cheese?” He paused, his voice going lower as if he had found the answer to the universe because he realized Tim had actually decided on what he had hoped they would be eating. “A deep fryer.”

He shared a look with Tim who smiled at him and they both exclaimed at the same time:

“Cuatro Quesos Dos Fritos!”

Jon started, surprised at their exclamation, staring at them as if they were aliens. Okay, wrong choice of word. Not alien, but something he hadn’t expected. Wondering if they weren’t lunatics –or if they really were adults. He asked in a small voice:

“What’s Quatro Quesos Dos Fritos?”

Tim seemed to remember they had a novice in the delicious art of cheesy food with them and started explaining as he got close to the oven.

“Only the most delicious snack of all time. It’s potatoes filled with a cheese mixture. And when they’re finished, they look a little something like this.”

While he had been distracting both Supers with his little explanation, Tim had taken a plate from within the oven and showed it to them. Conner looked at him, half amazed, half laughing.

“Dude, how did you just fabricate Cuatro Quesos Dos Fritos out of thin air?”

Tim smiled as Jon looked like a fish out of water. Luckily Conner had decided to humor him in his little game.

“C’mon Conner this is how all successful TV chefs do it.” He turned to Jon, his smile threatening to break his face as he took in Jon’s amazed look. “Try one of those, kid, because here’s the best part, they’re very healthy for us."

Jon snorted as he tried one of the Cuatro Quesos dos Fritos then stopped as he was hit by the amazing flavor of the treat, ready to complain to his father for hiding such marvelous food from him all his life. Conner, for his part, rolled his eyes and chose to focus on the delicious taste of the potatoes as he replied:

“I don’t even care that’s not true”

Tim looked affronted as if Conner had said the worse possible thing.

“Are you kidding? All major cheese groups are represented, you’ve got yellow, orange and white!”

Jon grinned as the two almost adults started arguing on the benefits of cheese.

They spent their night making Cuatro Quesos Dos Fritos and playing video Games. Jon complained about Damian (fully supported by Tim) and talked about his adventures in Super Hero-ing while Conner traded him for some of his own. Mostly those back in Hawai (no need for the kid to know about those times he was left to his own device or his Luthor Paranoia) with Roxy, Tana, Dubbilex, Rex and Sam. And while his heart squeezed when he thought about them (Dubbilex was dead and there was nothing he could do about it), they remained at the back of his thoughts. He was starting to truly move on from that part of his life and the various circumstances that had caused him so much grief. He was happy. His relationship with Jon was merely in its early stages, they were merely acquaintances at this point, but he could actually say “early” and believe there would be a follow-up.

He was happily settled against Tim, sharing his family with him because that’s how far they had gotten and he now had a nephew who looked up to him and it both scared him and left him elated (it almost reminded him of Bart when he was Impulse but he had known Kon’s issues better than Jon did and was much less star struck by him).

The best part though was that they were here making jokes and smiling and being happy without thinking about what could go wrong and, really, he couldn’t think of anything he would want more at this point (except having Bart and even Cassie with them).

Bonus:

“Can you believe it Robin? They had so many video games it was amazing! And Cuatro Quesos Dos Fritos had to be made in heaven, it’s hard to believe they exist!”

It was Sunday night and Jon and Damian had gone out for “Patrol” as Damian called it, and Jon had started rambling about his week-end in California the second Damian showed up. He snorted. His relationship with this Drake was more vitriolic than with the other one. Some details were confusing. The merging of the worlds meant that some things didn’t make complete sense as their different sets of memories adjusted to each other and some were just lost. In any case, it didn’t mean he had to be happy to hear about Drake’s “amazingness”.

“I’ve got to say though, I didn’t know what to expect when I got there but they’re so cool. Conner’s so lucky to have a boyfriend as cool as Tim!” He paused. “Wait, does that mean that we’re…kinda officially a family and…”

“They’re not dating”.

The voice cut right through Jon’s monologue like a cold shower would a heat streak gotten on a beach near Ajaccio. Jon was dumbstruck.

“What?”

Damian tried to level his eyes with Jon.

“I said that they’re not dating. As in they’re not together, not in a relationship”

Jon froze and Damian started waving his right hand in front of the younger boy’s eyes until he started blinking again. It was as if his stress levels had risen all at once and so had the pitch of his voice.

“How the hell is that possible ! ? “

Jon was now reviewing his whole Week-End, completely lost and looked at Damian when the boy, coming out of his own shock at Jon’s vocabulary, cleared his throat, trying to regain his snark.

“Now do you understand why I call Drake an idiot?”

AEN: First thing firsts, Conner actually knows what happened to him he just doesn’t want to think about it more than he has to. It was also a fairly important plot point in the real fic so when I thought about it later on I was fairly relieved :p

2nd, in my mind, Tim is about 6-10 months older than Conner. Because Conner was 16 for like a year and a half but when he started aging Tim was 15. So he died when he was 17 and Tim had turned 16 like 3 months before (Tim’s 16th Birthday issue happened around the beginning of Teen Titans). Then Kon was dead for a year and a half going on two years, Tim was 17 almost 18 at the end of Red Robin (we know that if N52 hadn’t happened we would have an issue about Tim’s 18th Birthday fairly soon after) so he was about 17 and a half (probably a little more) when Conner came back to life. Hence Tim being between 6 and 10 months older than Conner.

3. they need hugs. They all do.

4. the Cuatro Quesos Dos Fritos was shamelessly stolen from the Psych Slumber Party bit on USA today for a Psych Marathon a few years ago. Because Half the time I see Shawn and Gus I can't help but think of Tim and Kon (except I reverse the roles often). I just slightly modified it to fit the story. (but seriously if you haven't, go watch the first four seasons of Psych).

#Tim Drake #Clark Kent #Conner Kent #TimKon #Tim Drake Positivity Week #Batverse #BrOTP: TimKon #OTP: TimKon #DC comics #Angst & Fluff #Psych #Jon Samuel Kent

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ts-seychelles · 5 years

Text

EP. 9 - “Call Me A Spoon Cause I Really Tried To Stir The Pot” - AUGUSTO

Ruben went home...... expected? He was inactive af. He was definitely a closer ally of mine, and it sucks that he went down the way he did, but there was really nothing else that was going to be done to save him. There was a half attempted effort right before tribal, but also people didn't wanna do it bc he was throwing his closest people under the bus, which was bizarre to me. It was just a bad move ANYWHOM. I was busy last round until tribal essentially, and just didn't have time to do my confessional where I just go and RANK how much I trust everyone lol god speed Tier 1: Top Trust 1. Augusto - He is obviously my #1. He has been giving me some antsy responses lately, and he didn't immediately tell me about the Regan idol thing and STILL didn't tell me about the OG Malabar alliance that was made that includes Nicole, but it's fine because we've got each other as our number ones, and I genuinely don't think he has that kinda relationship with anyone else, and I'm fairly certain Augusto would never vote me out. 2. Dan - Honestly the difference between 2 and 3 are splitting hairs, but Dan seems like he is going to be the most beneficial to my game in the long run. He is definitely a more well versed player than #3, and I know that he is going to tell me most things. The way I found out Augusto was keeping things from me, was from Dan, and I know that my relationship with Dan is good, we've been to finals together, and he has told me on more than a few occasions that he trusts me the most in the game, which is normally a pretty good sign. 3. Crooks - Gosh I love Alex so much. I am so happy he got to return to the game, and I'm happy he just gets to play this merge the way he wants to. I do know he's a little socially awkward, he makes some questionable game moves, and honestly hasn't made it the FARTHEST in games recently, but I do think that Alex wouldn't turn his back on me if I showed him the utmost loyalty that I could, which I'm going to try to do. My biggest challenge for the rest of the season is going to be convincing all three of these people that I am running all the way to the end of this game with them, and hopefully that'll keep me from being blindsided haha Tier 2: A Good Amount of Trust 4. Vilma - Vilma is a gem. Tbh I think she trusts me more than most people as well. I don't think I'm her top person, but I do think I'm really up there. Vilma told me about the idol, we had three alliances in common (one with Zach, power bottoms with Asya, and golden girls with Dan and Augusto), but I do actually think that Vilma is just a straight up, and loyal, player. The only problem is that I think everyone sees Vilma as that. I feel she's just a wild card in my book because she CAN do something, but my gut is telling me she's going to want to ride this out with me as long as she can, especially since I know about her idol and normally people don't fuck with people who know they have the idol Tier 3: The Average Tier 5. Asya - Y'know......... idk. We have the Power Bottoms alliance, she has been very straight up with me in PMs, and I feel that Asya wouldn't do this to me. There are too many factors in the game right now, where I feel I can at least trust that she wouldn't vote for me until the final 9, so that's that on that. 6. Ricky - Ricky also really seems to have a good connection and trust with me. The main reasons I've got Ricky here (and kinda Asya too), is because I just feel that they both aren't the MOST active, and are definitely relying on some of their earlier relationships, which is me, also they're worried about being under fire, and I think that they will be soon because both of these guys are being coupled together, but we've been on good terms on a tribe before, and honestly this entire game, but I'm just pessimistic about anyone wanting to actually work with me long term, so I get confused. Tier 4: These People Make me Feel Confused 7. Regan - Who would've thought there's a world where Regan wasn't last, but instead she was right in the middle of the pack. Tbh, with how this game has gone, Regan should be higher, but just because of our past, this is a safe place to be. Regan and I have gone AT IT in the past, and she is a very sporadic player, and truly could do anything at any time, and she can decide she doesn't want to work with me anymore. I have an alliance with her and Augusto, which is making me feel good about our working relationship, and with Augusto hopefully staying very tight, he can make sure that there's no funny business. I do know that if Regan plays an idol at an unexpected time, I should probably get a little worried, and follow suit afterwards to make sure that it isn't an idol play on me. She has actually seemed to have been playing a good game so far, and I've got some confidence that Regan is going to shake the world a little bit this game, and I'm kinda here for it. 8. Jared - So like? I know he's a slimy motherfucker and he trusts other people way more than he could ever trust me, but I like him a lot as a person and we have great talks. I made a deal with Jared and Nicole to not go after them, and I know they have relationships with lots of people, and lots of trio chats, and they probably have to keep up in all of them to seem like they don't have trios with EVERYONE, but it's just a mess. I think once Jared or Nicole goes, I'm going to be incredibly close to the one who ends up staying, but I just don't know whoever stays, I am going to try to forge an incredible relationship with. I don't mind whether it's Jared or Nicole that ends up staying, but I bet Jared going is probably better for my long term game just because he's such a bigger snake in the grass. Also I know he knows about Regan's idol, so that's something too, but my connection with Jared, in this given moment, is better than my relationship with Nicole 9. Nicole - I feel we haven't connected in awhile, which is worrisome to me because I know she plays hard. I know Nicole is threatening, and she is probably more threatening than I've even thought about her being ever. I didn't think Nicole was a big ticket player, but honey she is PLAYING. I just need a better relationship. I know her or Jared should be out of the game soon, and I kinda hope Nicole is the one that falls by the wayside because I almost trust that Jared might lean on me more. 10. Roxy - ROXY IM SORRY YOU'RE DOWN HERE BECAUSE YOU SHOULDN'T BE, but you are the biggest ORG tease I've ever ever played with. You make me feel so good in our relationships every game we've played together, but then you've taken me out of both of them (in one you attempted, but failed) without hesitation, and I don't trust you. I know we're good friends, and I honestly think that you trust me more than you trust most other people in this game, but I still don't want you here, and if the opportunity arises, I really do know I'm going to want you out, and vote for you at the first chance I can. At this point, I'm going to keep talking to you as if we're working together, but I'm not giving you any information...... i cant trust it. I hope I can see your intentions were good after this game, but genuinely, I don't know what to believe with the last two ORG experiences we've had together. Tier 5: Who? 11. Frankie - I'm almost certain you're going home next lol. Talk to people :)

Regan is so fucking annoying sometimes. Like she acts like she knows better than everyone else all the time. I care about her as a human, but don’t pass judgement on me when what I’m doing has literally no bearing on your life whatsoever. Stop acting holier than thou and go back to fucking Red Robin and get your 20% tips and continue to pass judgement on the people who might want to go out with their family for a nice meal, but not be able to tip a full 20%. If you don’t like it, don’t fucking work a job that pays $2 an hour. Jesus Christ. It’s Christmas so I’m gonna go back into my Baby Jesus lane and shut the fuck up, but Regan’s on my shit list now.

6:31 PM okay i want Jared AND Nicole out I'm so TIRED of this like they clearly dont trust me nicole hasnt spoken to me since merge jared made me PROMISE that I wouldn't go after him, presuming in his tone that he already didnt trust me i am not liking my position. I need to go back and remember which people i told that I wanted Roxy out over Ruben bc i think more people might want to work with roxy now (which i knew would happen) and i dont want it all getting back to her because i think she thinks im one of her closest Augusto just told me that jared proposed to roxy a voting block of roxy augusto jared nicole asya ricky which makes me think even MORE that nicole jared ricky roxy asya need to GO But tbh I trust Asya, and kinda Ricky I have a feeling that Ricky wouldn't vote for me if it came down to it i also feel im lowkey playing a horrible game lmfao thank you for coming to my christmas day confessional :)

(A LITTLE LATER)

sorry...... im still going My biggest problem is that this game has been moving lowkey slow, strategically speaking and time wise, and now we've gotta wait an extra day to boot up the game again, even though no one is doing anything at 10pm the night of christmas, but whatever, that's old news and fucking frankie is probably going to go this round and then we're just going to have to wait another few days for the BATTLE to ensue, but honestly, more people going that I'm not directly aligned with is good because I just need as many insurance policies as possible I very much want to play the merge in the most cutthroat way i've ever played. I want to make those game moves and I want to get that respect. Let's be honest....... everyone knows im a fucking snake, so it isn't like this is anything new to anyone. I'm keeping loyal to my top 3 (maybe top 4 @vilma) (jk loves vilma), and then im going to wreck everyone else, and there's going to be almost nothing that's going to stop me. I'm out for blood, and it's starting with upping my social game for the rest of the game I am done with school, and I am on vacation until (presumably) the end of this game, so if I just keep up my social game, and make this game my #1 priority, im going to be in an incredible spot, but right now, im feeling like I need 2-3 people to go home before I feel super secure. The REALLY good thing is that I still have my idol, and me and my UTMOST closest ally (augusto) know where all three of them are, which is HUGE for the program, so I've just gotta make sure that I can use all this information to my advantage. I've gotta start getting in some tighter blocks, and more importantly make myself more available to people like ricky and asya, who I feel I haven't done the BEST job with, but I know they're two of the socially weaker people in the tribe.................... im just getting nervous and i want this game to GO

https://youtu.be/vmqseVAWX98

wish i didnt have to go to tribal xoxo

Roxy keeps helping me with the bransteele comp and I forgot she thinks we're friends..... i know i don't trust her, but she's good for now roxy you just got back in my good graces :))))))

(A LITTLE LATER)

Hi it's johnny im currently breaking down jared went to frankie and told frankie that me/vilma/dan have a f3 and that Jared wanted to make a big move this round..................... frankie then told augusto and augusto told us thank god, but like fuck you jared honestly. it's just horse shit because there's no good reason for him to be going after me other than our past and I fucking hate when people do that, however, i'm just anxious because I know that Vilma is safe, and Dan and Jared were on OG malabar together, and I know they've previously gotten along, meaning that the only other option is me it's just fucking annoying because jared is honestly supposed to be a friend, and in my head, i was refusing to vote for him or nicole this round because i like them both as people, and figured that i'd do something about it later when it became obvious one of them had to go, and not me initiating it myself, but now at this point i dont know what I do know is that I'm fairly confident in quite a few people not saying my name this round, and those people being 100% alex augusto dan vilma roxy, and then im fairly confident regan has my side too. realistically this should be giving me numbers, but I know that there's a lot more that comes into play than that on top of that i do have an idol, and I didn't want to play it this early, but it looks like I may have to.. the only good thing is that i know about vilma's idol and i know abotu regan's idol bc they both told me about it, and i feel if either of them knew i was in trouble, they'd consider using it on me because they're both more loyal players than they are selfish perhaps? (maybe moreso vilma than regan lol) roxy made an alliance chat with vilma augusto and myself, and roxy wants to go for ricky, which honestly, if we pretended like we were going for jared and nicole, and flushed out a ghost island advantage that either of them may have (which we're almost certain nicole has one bc she lied horribly about her visit to ghost island, according to augusto), so at this point i really really dont know. I feel im sitting on a lot of information right now, but im a scared pussy and dont really know what to do with all of this stuff that i'm being told because im quietly trying to sit on it and let augusto do all of the good work in trying to swing frankie onto our side. god bless them not knowing im with augusto i just need augusto to continue playing double agent until it keeps me safe lol also fuck you jared

https://youtu.be/oFPDXhxHgDs forgot to send last night

Johnny is a little fucking scumbag isn't he? So I'm hearing tea from Jared that Johnny approached him this morning about me and Vilma trying to steer the vote towards Nicole. That's a damn fucking lie. I never once tried to steer the vote that way. I think that Johnny is getting a little big for his britches. I could totally be getting played by Nicole and Jared rn, but I don't know why they would lie about all of this. Unless they really are trying to blindside me? Idk wtf is happening, but I just want to beat my fucking placement.

https://youtu.be/LWdipgmXYSs

This is my host chat today and idc who is offended by the following messages: I HATE THIS GAME im so annoyed why is jared doing this like why I was trying to be NICE 2:37 PM im going to be the target this round literally fuck jared i hate him so fucking much why is he such a dick i need to write a confessional 2:45 PM k i confessed my hatred and feelings im just annoyed that this is how this is going down and I just KNEW that this shit would happen with jared the good thing is that he isnt aware of my relationships 3:08 PM I feel I have the most handle on this situation though lowkey 5:20 PM okay they're targeting dan im not worried anymore lol 5:33 PM dan is going to blow up the game please dont dan please he wants to expose the fact that we know the other side is planning something I know we have six people they're trying to get out dan and they're pinning dan/vilma/i as a trio they being jared and nicole, probably asya and ricky, but they don't really have brains augusto and roxy are playing the middle hard right now to make sure that nothing happens to me specifically, but if the vote stays on dan then im not going to be bothered about it, but honestly i dont want to lose a number, and I'd rather silently push than anything so idk im trying to think ive got a little over an hour to do something about it 6:00 PM gosh this is getting messy im not okay with it im trying to swing alex right now so we dont have to go to rock 6:15 PM LMAO HOW IS AUGUSTO IN THE MIX SOMEONE TELL ME WHERE THAT CAME FROM BECAUSE I DONT KNOW omg this is getting too messy 6:22 PM ill take 12th. let's have some fun I hate this game I hate this game I hate this game I hate this game I hate this game I hate this game I hate this game I hate this game If anyone including the hosts knows what's going on I will send you on a European vacation jared doesnt even know the whole story but i am talking to jared now we're like businessmen sitting at a table Ugh I hate Jared But I am playing nice like i actually love him im going at it with jared in a good way i want him back in mine and dan's good graces ugh vilma is a lowkey useless ally Alex is such a shitty socializer i just need to put that out there like there are things that should stay in your head and he's got a lot that he keeps putting on paper LMAO ALEX IS A LEAKY FAUCET HE SAID HE WANTS A F2 WITH ME BUT HUNNI LISTEN YOU DONT GO TELLING SOMEONE IMMEDIATELY WHAT I SAID AFTER I TOLD IT TO YOU im so mad because this is just dumb survivor gameplay on alex's part because ricky was so quick to tell people that alex told him this information lmao

(A LITTLE LATER)

can we talk about me being the king of exploiting every piece of information I found out today to someone with a big mouth, so this way it would get around and i wouldn't be targeted? wooooooooo

Alright so this round has been really hecking hectic. I found a clue to the idol and highkey I wanted to share it with Jared/Nicole but I needed to reaffirm my alliance with Asya and Ricky. And then we were FINALLY gonna blindside Dan. Then Frankie told Dan. Then Dan told Johnny. Then Johnny told me despite me already knowing all of this. Then he told me he wanted Ricky out. So I told Ricky. Ricky told Dan and Johnny. So Johnny knows I spilled the beans. That's fun. And now Frankie's going home for being a blabbermouth. That's what happens when you speak huh!

Okay so basically Things became messy And I don't know who's telling the truth Either Johnny or Jared+Nicole are bullshitting me and I don't know which It seems everyone's voting Frankie now Which I guess I'm fine with But I don't even know who I'm working with next round Because nobody includes me in anything All I know is I never told anyone I wanted to vote Nicole out and the person who spilled those rumors must get out of here, FAST I'm rather pissed I feel like I don't trust anyone Where are all my real allies? Oh I don't have those Everyone's so shady Can I get voted out even though I'm immune? I hate this I didn't sign up for THIS I don't think a single person is being straight with me So from now on I'm a free agent I'm back to square one

Ricky and I called for like a half hour and compared notes and honestly, Johnny has got to go, but not right now. If that’s a big miss steak, oh well, but I do think I’m gonna make it through this vote which is exciting. If I get fucking 12th again I’m gonna kermit I think. I can’t believe I trusted the straight fraternity brother. Ugh

ok soooo i might have an alliance of 6 lets hope it works and im not the second boot again after my return lmaoo

this is a fucking mess

wowowow these people make me sooooo MADDDDTTTT just do what i want!!!!

(A LITTLE LATER)

everyone is ignoring me except johnny and augusto and ik im being voted against like 11-1 and it feels gross lol i hate everyone here and im not voting for most of them at the end. there was like 2 people i didnt message and ig that means im "inactive" or some shit

Oh SHIT I got so distracted by the messiness that I forgot to tell I accidentally won immunity AGAIN fuck my life I was trying to throw Vilma Hmm I'm trying to throw this challenge but at the same time look like I made at least some effort but suck I hope at least some people tried for real Pippa You make me laugh so hard Vilma IS THIS A JOKE I SWEAR I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER WIN WITH THAT Fuck I'm ruining all my chances at going deep with these immunities (cwl) I hope people realise my score was bad FUCK This is the thing, I didn't want to abstain because then it would look like I'm just lazy but I wanted them to think that I actually suck. Gosh I'm failing at life I guess I should just use these opportunities to build better relationships with people but everyone knows I'm horrible at that dnn congrats compbeast <3 Vilma SHUSH

SO ITS FRANKIE BUT I MIGHT GO HOME with an idol in my pocket

Call me spoon cause I really tried to stir the pot this tribal to no avail.

#itsgametimekids

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littlebitofmayhem · 7 years

Text

CS Fic Rec

Here are a list of my fave friends to lovers/ friends with benifits fics xo

The Favour by Madj

AU. Emma Swan doesn't do relationships, but her annoyingly attractive neighbor, Killian Jones, might change her views. Captain Swan.

Never Tear Us Apart by Kjb2609

A CS Modern AU Fanfic Killian Jones is the front man for a band who have not yet made the big time. He is also in love with his good friend (and the girlfriend of their manager) the unattainable Emma Swan. When their manager turns out not to be the man they thought, his friendship with Emma is threatened.

All That You Are (Is All That I’ll Ever Need) by bluestoplights

Modern AU / It's really difficult to figure out you're in love with your best friend if you've never known what it's like to be in love in the first place.

The Invitation by Kjb2609

When Emma Swan was feeling the pressure from her family about her single status, her friend Killian seems like the perfect solution to a Christmas invitation. A CS Fake Dating AU

The Message by Kjb2609

Emma Swan thought she was right to stop this thing with Killian Jones going too far - anything to keep their friendship intact for her and her son Henry. But when it looks as though he may have moved on, she is no longer sure she made the right decision... (This was previously in my Whenever, Wherever group but I decided to give it its own story.)

Call It Love by Montana-Rosalie

As children, Emma and Killian were friends. Now they are all grown up, and everything has changed.

It Was Certain by tnplh

If your best friend demands you marry him for free health insurance, well, maybe sometimes you just give in. Captain Swan.

15 by nowforruin

"She's fifteen the first time she meets him, her brother's new friend. She's shy and awkward, hasn't quite figured out how to tame her long blonde hair yet or grown into her spindly legs. He's already beautiful, bright blue eyes that make her wish she was prettier, older, more his type, but he ruffles her hair as he leaves with David." - Emma & Killian through the years. CS.

The Stars Walk Backwards by nowforruin

It’s only supposed to ever be one night, but before they know it, it’s a doorway in Paris, and an apartment in San Diego, and a blinking low battery light in Maine. Emma knows she needs to let Killian go, but there’s always that one day a year she can’t seem to stay away...

What We Wouldn’t Do by Sambethe

"Seriously. We know how to pick 'em, Jones." In the wake of another break-up, Emma & Killian make a drunken pact. [Captain Swan, with mentions of past Emma/August]

When Killian Met Emma by lenfaz

They met when they were 22, fresh out of college and ready to embark on a two-day journey. Killian was looking for a partner for the trip that would take him to his new work in advertising in a new city. His former roommate David had mentioned that his girlfriend's friend, Emma, was headed to Chicago to work in social services. Friends with Benefits AU

Someplace Nice by evil_isnt_born

Every time Emma wanted to escape her life for somewhere better, she only had to call and he would be there

Theoretically by wtvoc

Emma's friend Killian has a reputation for sleeping around (and so does she). When he gives her a surprising gift on her thirtieth birthday, something about it unleashes the question she's been wondering for years: is he really as good as they say?

The Fourth Time by headoverhook

You always meet twice in life, but sometimes it takes you more than two meetings to realize that you’ve met your second half. ‘Four Weddings and a Funeral’ AU.

The 12 Tropes of Christmas by nostalgia_101

Modern AU - When Emma and Killian realize their friends are hellbent on setting them up as a couple, they put their heads together and plot out a way to get their revenge.

Remember This Moment by colormyheartred

The one where Emma’s in prison but Killian’s waiting for her when she gets out.

Virtue by startswithhope

What if the person you always go to for answers has actually be the answer all along? 2400 words of fluffy, mildly smutty, Lieutenant Duckling for your AU week reading pleasure…

More Than You Bargained For by A Whisper Of Grace

AU. A year after their break up, Neal is back in town and determined to get Emma to speak to him. She wants to show him that she doesn't want or need him back in her life, and reluctantly enlists Killian's help to do so.

I Won’t Say I’m In Love by wrnkledtime

i won’t say i’m in love: “i recently dumped my ex and i just realized that he still has something really, really important of mine that he took away from me during our relationship - i need to get it back right now immediately and you’re helping me sneak into his house bc you don’t know it yet, but this has everything to do with you” au

aka the one where killian and emma are best friends, who have pined for one another since the beginning of time, and they get uninvited to neal’s lame ass halloween party (that they didn’t wanna go to anyways), but then emma realizes that neal still has her good luck charm and she wants it back for an upcoming exam, so of course she’s going to drag killian along with her.

Her Crowning Glory by emmaofmisthaven

AU. The laws are clear: to be crowned Queen of Eala, a princess has to be married. Emma has a month to find a husband, or else the crown will be snatched from her and given to the only other heir to the throne, one Killian Jones.

We Can’t Be Friends by FluentSarcasm

For CS AU Week on Tumblr: Emma Swan & Killian Jones have been best friends for over 15 years when she gets pregnant by her boyfriend Neal. When Neal dumps her and dies soon after, Killian steps in to help her raise Henry. Emma's realization that she's been in love with Killian all along forces her to admit that maybe she doesn't want to be /just friends/ anymore.

Worth the Risk, Worth the Guarantee by piratesails

The rule is simple enough: don't fall for your best friend. No matter how loudly her laugh echoes in your head in the middle of the night, or how beautifully endearing the freckles that climb up her arms look under the afternoon sun. And yet, Killian finds it hard to run out of reasons why Emma Swan is the most perfect person he has and will ever meet. Lt. Duckling. Oneshot.

Make Believe by emmasbeanies

AU: Killian Jones & Emma Nolan have been inseparable since childhood, but when Emma gets the chance to move to New York for school, Killian has a choice to make. Will he let her slip away or will he admit to the feelings he's been hiding all along?

7 Minutes by startswithhope

Modern AU - "We've been nothing but friends for our whole lives but then we played seven minutes in heaven on a dare and now I think I might actually be in love with you." Expect a sexy spin on the best friends secretly in love with each other trope...

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