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latestnews2018-blog · 6 years

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Impact Slammiversary XVI Live Coverage: Austin Aries Vs. Moose, Hair Vs. Mask Match, Knockouts

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Impact Slammiversary XVI Live Coverage: Austin Aries Vs. Moose, Hair Vs. Mask Match, Knockouts

Welcome to the Wrestling Inc’s live coverage of Impact Slammiversary XVI PPV. We will be providing live ongoing coverage of tonight’s event, starting at 8pm ET! All of you can chime in with your thoughts throughout the show in the comments section below.

Please help spread word of tonight’s coverage by using the various SHARE buttons on the page to let others know where to join in. Hit the REFRESH button on your browser to get the most up-to-date results.

– Opening vignette recaps all of tonight’s matches as we see quick interviews from multiple wrestlers.

Johnny Impact vs. Taiji Ishimori vs. Fenix vs. Petey Williams

Chaotic start, Ishimori with a springboard hurricanrana that sends Fenix out of the ring. Impact and Ishimori face off as the crowd gives a “Welcome back” to both guys. Impact tries for standing moonsault, nobody home, Ishimori gives it a shot too and lands on his feet. Running knee smacks Ishimori right in the face, Impact tries for a moonsault, lands on his feet as Fenix runs in. He does a little taunting as hits a back handspring off the ropes. Fenix dances on the ropes a bit, Impact goes up to the second, Fenix bounces up and hits a hurricanrana sending him down to the mat!

THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NUTS! #SlamXVI @TheRealMorrison @ReyFenixMx pic.twitter.com/PT8pxpCN3u

IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) July 23, 2018

Williams in there against Fenix, big chops by Fenix. Williams drops Fenix, goes for a cover, two-count. Ishimori in there now, but Williams gets Ishimori in the tree of woe and hits a superkick to the leg. Another pin attempt, Fenix drops in to tbreak that up. Ishimori tries for a suicide dive, Impact catches him with a kick, but Williams with a top rope hurricanrana that takes out Impact. Fenix with a flip over the top rope, dropping both Impact and Williams. Ishimori is the last guy in the ring hits a golden moonsault taking out all three guys.

.@ReyFenixMx FLYS in from out of nowhere! #SLamXVI pic.twitter.com/wH0Q2uUSk5

IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) July 23, 2018

Action back in the ring, multiple guys caught up in the corner, powerbomb/samoan drop combo, Fenix with a nice missile dropkick on Impact. Ishimori with a crazy tilt-a-whirl head scissors on Fenix. Williams tries for a canadian destroyer on Ishimori, no, goes right into a sharpshooter, but breaks the hold to stop Impact. Tries for another canadian destroyer, Impact with a swinging neckbreak, pin, Fenix with a boot to the forehead of Impact to stop that count. Fenix with a sick rolling cutter from the apron into the ring, cover, Ishimori breaks up the pin.

Rolling cutter by @ReyFenixMx! #SLamXVI pic.twitter.com/u9iZ8n5wJr

IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) July 23, 2018

Ishimori and Fenix in the ring, running knees in the corner on Fenix. Double knees to Fenix’s chest, cover, Williams rushes in to stop that. Superkick party that eventually drops everyone in the ring. Impact gets planted by Ishimori, he heads up and hits the 450 splash, Williams hits the canadian destroyed on Ishimori, Fenix with a springboard double stomp on Williams, cover, 1-2! Fenix tries for a muscle buster, Impact with a superkick, hits starship pain on Fenix, cover, 1-2-3. Great opener from these four.

Winner: Johnny Impact via Pinfall

– OGz Lair, Homicide and Hernandez getting ready for their match, Homicide says he’s sick of Konnan and his empire. The King shows up and tells them to keep feeding that fire, he said they are the ones who deserve the empire, not Ortiz and Santana. Tonight, they will make LAX cry tears of blood. He says after win, they will take that LAX name and burn it, OGz will rise up.

– Clips of Tessa Blanchard are shown, Blanchard says she’s going to run over the women’s division, despite Madison Rayne putting a wrench in her plans. Allie says she gets there’s issues between Tessa and Madison, but that’s no excuse to just attack someone, she’s not going to sit by and let that happen. Blanchard says she’s going to make Allie think twice about getting in her business. Allie talks about what happened with Rosemary and after all of that Allie has come out the other side fearless.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Allie

The two do a bit of trash talking in the middle of the ring until Tessa piefaces Allie. Allie kicks Tess down and rolls through her. Allie with a chop, but gets sent into the second rope, Tessa charges in, misses, Allie tries the same, misses. Tessa pulls Allie out on the apron and lands a bunch of clubbing blows. She tries for a leg drop on the apron, nope. Allie heads up to the second rope and nails a rough looking crossbody on Tessa.

.@AllieImpact takes flight! #SlamXVI

?? https://t.co/2AEuPvrsmg pic.twitter.com/WzH4WCOm9q

— TDE Wrestling (@totaldivaseps) July 23, 2018

Allie gets dropped on the floor, takes until 8 to get back into the ring. Tessa with a bunch of strikes on the grounded Allie. Crowd boos. Tessa sends Allie into the second rope, running dropkick, cover, two. Tess looks for a side suplex, no, Allie with a suplex of her own, goes for a superkick, gets caught, tripped, and Tessa starts to work the knee.

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pcwpolwrestling · 7 years

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Rewind- 1/20/2009 Edition of PCW Extreme Political TV - Obama Sworn in as PCW CEO

LAST WEEK ON PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV: -‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Joe SixPacks) defeated Daisy Cutter-Bomb (Domination Inc.)

-‘The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin confronts Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman over their attacks at PCW House shows. Code Pink debuts and attacks Palin. She gets Eskimo Piefaced by Kalee Jones- The Eskimo Queen.

-Jack Schett and Bull Schett (Progressive Alliance) become the #1 contenders for the PCW Tag Team belts after beating ‘The Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade (Joe SixPacks)

-Domination Inc. announces that their Corporate Counsel Felcher and Felcher found a loophole in the PCW rules that state the only time title defenses are mandatory is at Pay Per View shows. Therefore, the PCW Tag Team and Women’s title matches at PCW Night of Champions will be non-title bouts.

-SNAFU was to have met PCW Television Champion ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido for the TV belt. But Dave the Mechanic took him out in revenge for SNAFU interfering in his title matches against Escondido. Dave warns SNAFU to stay out of his match at PCW Night of Champions against Escondido.

PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS January 20th, 2009 Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon Wauseon, OH. HOST: Johnny Suave

Suave: Huge lines of people formed early this morning in front of Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon to see PCW Night of Champions and to watch the installment of Barack Obama as PCW CEO. Tonight’s card is as follows:

-‘The Eskimo Queen’ Kalee Jones and ’The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (American Patriots) vs. Code Pink and Emily List (Progressive Alliance)

-PCW Television Title Match: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido © (Progressive Alliance) defends against Dave the Mechanic (Joe Sixpacks)

-PCW Tag Team Title Match: Big Oil w/Texas Tex and Kirk Walstreit ‘Wall Street Market Analyst with a man crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit’ © (Domination Inc.) vs. Jack Schett and Bull Schett w/Horst Schett and Hans Gruber- the Extreme German Schnauzer

-PCW Women’s Title Match: Kathryn Randall Collins © (Domination Inc.) vs. ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Joe Sixpacks)

-PCW Title Match: O’Beck Bahama w/‘Not Just Unbearable…not just intolerable…he is’ Justin Sufferable © (Progressive Alliance) vs. Kevin Scott (Joe Sixpacks)

Suave: Last week, Domination Inc. stated that the PCW Tag Team and Women’s Title matches involving their wrestlers will be non-title matches thanks to a loophole found in the PCW rules. Last night, the PCW Competition Committee worked late into the night to hammer out a change in the rules. Tonight, they announce their decision.

PCW COMPETITION COMMITTEE ANNOUNCEMENT CONCERNING TITLE DEFENSESHarry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, and Steny Hoyer of the Progressive Alliance are joined by American Patriots’ John Boehner and Mitch McConnell.

Pelosi: Last week, Domination Inc. announced that they found a loophole in the PCW competition rules that allowed their wrestlers, PCW Tag Team Champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit, PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins, not to put their title belts up in matches tonight. After a long consultation between all five members of the PCW Competition Committee, PCW CEO George W, and PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama, we have come up with a solution.

Pelosi produces a sheet of paper and reads from it.

Pelosi: We, the PCW Competition Committee, by unanimous vote, hereby change the PCW Rules and By-Laws as follows: ‘Each champion must put their title up in competition at Pay Per View shows, PCW Night of Champions, and otherwise, at least once a month. Therefore, the PCW Competition Committee decrees that tonight’s matches between Jack and Bull Schett vs. Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit WILL be for the PCW Tag Team belts. Tonight’s match between ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin and Kathryn Randall Collins will be for the PCW Women’s title.

Suave: There you have it! The PCW Competition Committee has overruled Domination Inc. We will have FOUR title matches tonight!

BARACK OBAMA INSTALLATION AS PCW CEOThe off-key strains of George W’s mariachi band playing the opening notes of “Hail to the Chief’ signal the entrance of the outgoing PCW CEO. George W and his aide de camp Dick, strained his back so he’s being wheeled up to the ring, somberly head towards the ring. The crowd gives him a middling ovation.

Suave: Well, one nice thing about W retiring. I won’t have to listen to that God-awful tone deaf mariachi band butcher ‘Hail to the Chief’ anymore.

*flute and clarinet flourish*

Two men come out and unroll a white carpet to the ring steps. Dancers then dance. Ballet dancers…ballet? Little children walk up the white carpet and drop rose petals. Someone lets loose some pigeons…we’re still not sure just how they’ll get out of the building. The crowd stands and lets out a loud ovation as PCW CEO-designate Barack Obama appears with his Aide de Camp to be Joe Biden by his side.

Suave: AND HERE COMES THE PCW CEO-DESIGNATE BARACK OBAMA! LISTEN TO THIS CROWD!

PCW Owner Bubba Jackson and PCW Director of Security Dawn McGill climb into the ring. Bubba prepares to administer the oath.

Bubba: All right…all right. (He tries to get the crowd to quiet down.) Barack, are you ready?

Barack: Yes.

Bubba: Okay. Do you swear that you’ll…do the best possible job possible to…help PCW prosper…and get…

Barack: Big?

Bubba: Yeah. Big.

Barack: Yes.

Bubba: Congratulations Mr. CEO.

The crowd stands and cheers.

Suave: And that’s it? Barack Obama is now the PCW CEO…and maybe Bubba ought to write something out ahead of time before trying to administer the oath- such as it was.

Barack: “My fellow citizens: I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank George W. for his service to PCW, as well as the generosity and cooperation he has shown throughout this transition period. Today, I say to you that the challenges PCW faces are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this- they will be met.

The crowd claps.

Barack: We must-

*‘Domination Inc. will completely takeover Political Championship Wrestling by any and all means*

Suave: Well? I wondered how long it was going to take Domination Inc. to come out. They can’t be the least bit happy about the PCW Competition Committee’s ruling.

CEO ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann, CFO Gordon Guyko, Corporate Counsel Felcher and Felcher, and Whiskey Tango Foxtrot come to the ring.

Suave: Yep. McMann- not happy.

McMann: All right Mr. PCW CEO. Earlier tonight your competition committee did a grave disservice to Domination Inc. by making tonight’s matches involving Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit and Kathryn Randall Collins title matches. This is unacceptable and totally unfair. My wrestlers did not prepare for a title defense tonight.

Barack: “I haven’t signed the official proclamation yet, Mr. McMann. What are you asking?

McMann: “I’m not asking, I’m demanding. You either tear that piece of paper up and keep those matches non-title or else Domination Inc will walk out of here and you’ll have no matches at all.

Suave: WHOA! MR. McMANN IS THREATENING THE NEW PCW CEO!

Joe Biden leans into Obama’s ear.

Biden: See, I told you you’d face a challenge within 6 months.

Barack: Oh, shut up.

Obama looks at McMann. Then he looks at the sheet of paper.

Suave: What is he going to do? Will Obama sign off on it? Or will he give in to Mr. McMann’s demands?

McMann: Well? What’s it going to be?

Obama again glances at McMann. Then he reaches into his suit pocket, pulls out a pen, and defiantly signs off on the proclamation. The crowd explodes. Mr. McMann goes ballistic.

McMann: FINE! THAT’S IT. DOMINATION INC- WE’RE OUT OF HERE!

McMann turns to leave.

Barack: Before you all leave the premises, make sure you give the title belts to Ms. McGill here.

McMann stops and turns around.

McMann: What?

Barack: You see, there’s a clause in the PCW rules that state if a wrestler deliberately no-shows a match without giving notice or cause, then he or she automatically forfeits whatever title he or she has. So, if you want to walk out of here- be my guest. Just leave the belts behind before you go.

Again, the crowd cheers.

Suave: HOLY CRAP! MR. McMANN CAN’T BELIEVE IT!

Obama produces a PCW rulebook and turns it to the appropriate page and points to it.

Barack: So…what’s it going to be?

McMann spins on his heels and walks out with the other members of Domination Inc. in tow.

Suave: WHAT WILL HAPPEN NOW? WILL DOMINATION INC SHOW UP FOR THEIR MATCHES?

Backstage, McMann, Guyko, WTF, and Felcher and Felcher file into Domination Inc’s suite. Two Sheriff’s Deputies guard the door to intercept them if they attempt to leave Hack’s with the title belts.

PCW NEWSLINE

KEITH OLBERMANN, ARIANNA HUFFINGTON, AND PROFESSOR PAUL KRUGMAN ONCE AGAIN ATTACK SARAH PALIN AT PCW HOUSE SHOWBut this time, The Alaskan Pitbull gets a little back up…

REPLAY FROM 1/17 PCW HOUSE SHOW IN VAN WERT, OHIO

KALEE JONES w/Sarah Palin (American Patriots) vs. ‘Trailer Park Sweetheart’ TANYA HARDY w/The White Trash Posse (Independent)Jones Eskimo Piefaces Hardy and pins her. Sarah Palin enters the ring and holds up Jones’ hand in victory.

Code Pink hits the ring and confronts Palin. Olbermann, Huffington, and Krugman climb into the ring as well and join Code Pink. Kalee Jones stands next to Palin. Emily List of the Progressive Alliance sneaks in behind Palin and grabs her. She starts choking her. Jones turns around and moves towards List. Code Pink leaps on her back and locks in a sleeper hold. Jones spins around briefly and slowly succumbs to the sleeper. Code Pink then pulls out a pair of handcuffs and cuffs Palin to the ring post. Both List and Code Pink start whaling away on Palin. Huffington joins in as Olbermann and Krugman smugly look on.

Then a woman wearing a fur coat, a bikini top underneath, a mini-skirt, and stiletto heels, smoking a cigarette and swilling from a bottle of Jack Daniels runs in with Politically Incorrect (NRA, Nic Koteen, Al Cahall). NRA, Koteen, and Cahall hit the ring. Huffington, Olbermann and Krugman quickly exit. Koteen yanks Code Pink off of Palin and throws her across the ring. Cahall lifts up Emily List and holds her for a now revived Kalee Jones. Jones Eskimo Piefaces List. Then she Eskimo Piefaces Code Pink.

MATCH #1 KALEE JONES- The Eskimo Queen and ‘The Alaskan Pitbull’ SARAH PALIN (American Patriots) vs. CODE PINK and EMILY LIST w/Keith Olbermann, Arianna Huffington, and Professor Paul Krugman (Progressive Alliance) Suave: Well, well, well. After two weeks of withering sneak attacks by Olbermann, Huffington, and Krugman, Palin may get her hands on them tonight. Kalee Jones is going to be a force in the PCW Women’s division very soon.

Jones and Code Pink to start. They lock up and Jones shoves Code Pink to the canvas. Code Pink back up and hits a single leg takedown on the Eskimo Queen. They roll around a bit before dropping out of the ring to the floor. Code Pink drop kicks Jones who barely budges. She tries again. Jones move and Code Pink kicks the steel barricade. Jones goes for a table but Emily List comes around and stops that. List is then heaved into the barricade by Jones and she again goes for a table. Code Pink tries to get up.

Suave: I think Code Pink hurt her ankle. She’s not moving very well.

Code Pink can barely walk. Jones grabs List by the hair and drags her to the table. List rakes the eyes and manages to escape. Jones, temporarily blinded, grabs the injured Code Pink and sets her up for the Eskimo Pieface.

Suave: Oh, no…*WHAM* HOLY CRAP!

Crowd: PCW!…PCW!…PCW!

List missile dropkicks Jones and drives her into the remnants of the table on top of Code Pink.

Arianna throws a chain to List and she busts Jones open with it. List grinds the chain into the Eskimo Queen’s open cut. List whips Jones with the chain across the back several times. Then she wraps it around her neck and tries to choke her out with it. Jones manages to power out and escape. Jones lands a right but List takes her legs out and she slams back to the mat. List finds a chair and sets Jones in it. Then she climbs back into the ring.

Suave: THIS COULD BE IT! WAIT! SARAH PALIN’S IN THE RING!

List sees her and turns around. Palin charges and spears List.

Suave: HOLY CRAP!

Crowd: HOLY S***!…HOLY S***!…HOLY S***!

Both ladies tumble to the floor! Jones puts List in the chair. She goes back in and DIVES through the ropes and destroys List.

Suave: HOLY CRAP! KALEE JONES JUST SPEARED LIST ON THE CHAIR-…HERE COMES THE ANGRY LEFT WING BLOGGERS!

Olbermann and Krugman doubleteam Jones and throw her into the steel barricade. Huffington waves Eric Alterman, Daily Kos, and Media Matters for America to Palin and they attack her. Huffington pulls out a table.

Suave: THEY’RE GOING TO PUT SARAH PALIN THROUGH A TABLE!

Daily Kos and Alterman lift Palin up but then the crowd roars and…

Suave: IT’S POLITICALLY INCORRECT!

Nic Koteen, Al Cahall, NRA, and a mysterious woman wearing a bikini top covered by a lush, fur coat, smoking a cigarette and swilling from a bottle of Jack Daniels.

*CLANG* *CLANG*

Suave: KOTEEN AND CAHALL PLASTER DAILY KOS AND ALTERMAN WITH CHAIR SHOTS!

NRA low blows Olbermann. Then he lifts him up across his shoulders.

Suave: GUN RACK! GUN RACK! GUN RACK!

Krugman shoves NRA. NRA drops Olbermann and locks in on Krugman.

Suave: Big mistake there, Paul. Guess you’re not as smart as you think you are.

Krugman tries to beg off. NRA lifts him up and puts him in the…

Suave: GUN RACK! GUN RACK! GUN RACK!

Arianna’s in the ring and backing away from the mysterious woman.

Arianna: Who…who the hell are you?

Woman: You can call me the Queen of Anti-Political Extreme- Andrea Doria.

Suave: The Queen of Anti-Political Extreme. Interesting choice of name.

Andrea: You know, I may not agree with everything Sarah Palin stands for. But I can’t sit back and watch the way she’s been treated without doing something. Just because she’s a woman and doesn’t spout the NOW line, just because she lives in Alaska and they have a different way of going about things, and just because she doesn’t kow tow to the political correctness dogma, does not give you carte blanche to tee off on her like that. An eye for an eye. If you keep attacking Sarah Palin, Politically Incorrect and I will be there and return the fire in spades.

Suave: WHOA! ANDREA DORIA AND POLITICALLY INCORRECT ARE COMING TO SARAH PALIN’S AID! WE’VE GOT FOUR TITLE MATCHES COMING UP IN JUST A MINUTE!

youtube

Hour 2

DOMINATION INC. SUITE‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann paces back and forth in his office. The door busts open and Quadruple R bursts in.

Quad R: This is total and complete bull****! We don’t have to take this from them. I’m sick and tired of getting screwed over by PCW. We can’t let this go unanswered. I want them and I want them now. Let me do it, Mr. McMann. Let me do it.

McMann hesitates.

McMann: Oh…the hell with it. Fine. When KRC’s match starts, go do whatever you’re going to do.

Suave: O—kay. That doesn’t augur good for the women’s title match. Let’s go back to last week’s PCW Extreme Political TV as ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido was to defend the PCW Television Title against SNAFU.

REPLAY- MATCH SNAFU w/Dr. Bill (Independent) vs. ‘No Frills’ CHRIS ESCONDIDO (Progressive Alliance)Escondido’s already in the ring. No sign of SNAFU or Dr. Bill.

Suave: “I wonder what’s going on?”

BACKSTAGE

Dave the Mechanic stands over an unconscious SNAFU. Tequila Sheila has the battery to Dr. Bill’s motorized wheelchair. Dave goes over to Dr. Bill.

Dave the Mechanic: Here’s the scoop, Doc. I will get my chance at the PCW Television Title next week at PCW Night of Champions. I will do so without any interference from you or SNAFU or else I promise you that anything you do to me I will return ten thousand times over. This is my title shot. You and SNAFU stay the hell away.

DR. BILL PROMODr. Bill: All right. You’ve got your wish, Dave. SNAFU has a concussion and he’s still recovering which means we won’t be at PCW Night of Champions. But mark my words. You’re now on the list as well. First, we’ll deal with Escondido. Then, we’ll deal with you. But remember this- when you don’t respond to what happens in the world, you don’t respond to what people say to you. What you do is respond to what you say to yourself about what they say to you. It’s all about you, it’s not about them. Or in other words, we will respond in kind to your attack last week. It doesn’t take a nagging mother-in-law to cry a lot, Dave. And when SNAFU gets through with you, that’s exactly what you’ll be doing. Crying. With your mother-in-law. Or something like that. Now…go take on the day.

Suave: So. It looks like SNAFU is out. Can Dave the Mechanic capitalize on this? We’re about to find out.

MATCH #2 PCW TELEVISION TITLE MATCH: ‘No Frills’ CHRIS ESCONDIDO © (Progressive Alliance) vs. DAVE THE MECHANIC w/Tequila Sheila (Joe SixPacks)The bell rings and they lock up. Quick chain wrestling sequence where both men reverse each other. The crowd claps in appreciation. Escondido puts Dave in a headlock. Dave escapes and whips Escondido off the ropes. Hip toss sends Escondido to the canvas. Dave hits a bulldog and covers. Escondido kicks out at two. Another headlock by Escondido, but again Dave gets out and whips the TV Champ into the ropes. Escondido holds on to the ropes and composes himself. Escondido comes back with a boot and goes to the ring apron. Dave charges, Escondido hits a shoulder block, and he tries to leap back in. Dave catches coming in and Escondido gets sent to the outside. Dave follows and whips Escondido into the ring post. Dave brings Escondido back into the ring and works on the left shoulder. He rams Escondido into the turnbuckle. Escondido tries fights out with a kick but Dave catches him on the second try and drills Escondido’s head right into the mat. Cover. Again, Escondido kicks out at two. Escondido starts fighting back. He blocks a shoulder block attempt and hits a boot to the face. Escondido covers…two count.

Suave: So far, Dave the Mechanic is about a step ahead of the PCW TV champ. He continues to show that he belongs in there with him.

Escondido locks Dave in a reverse headlock. Dave fights out and catches Jack ducking too early after a whip and nails him with a boot to the face. Dave goes up top, but Escondido catches him and turns it into a superplex. Escondido crawls over and covers. Dave kicks out at two. Again, Escondido goes back to an arm wrench hammerlock and tries to wear down Dave. Dave makes the corner. But Escondido hammers at his back and lifts him up on the turnbuckle.

Suave: Superplex on the way!

Dave fights out of the superplex. Escondido ducks down and hits a powerbomb. Cover. Another two count. Dave kicks out at two! Escondido follows with a belly to belly Suplex. Another cover; another two count. Escondido notices the turnbuckle pad got ripped off. Escondido bulldogs Dave and then tries to apply the Angle Ankle Lock. Dave rolls out and counters with a side Russian Legsweep. Escondido back up and Dave shoves off a second bulldog attempt. Roll up. Escondido kicks out in 2. A third bulldog attempt doesn’t work. Escondido into the ropes. Dave rolls him up. One…two…barely kicks out.

Suave: WOW! That was a 2.999999 count. Escondido barely got out but he’s in big trou-…Hey…who’s that? That’s Rahm Emanuel…RAHM-BO!

Crowd: RAHMMMM-BO….RAHMMMMM-BO…

Irish whip attempt by Dave. Escondido counters and sends Dave into the ropes. Emanuel grabs Dave and drops a F-Bomb on him.

Suave: HOLY CRAP! EMANUEL GRABBED DAVE AND GAVE HIM A FREAKIN’ F-BOMB THAT NEARLY DECAPATATED HIM!

Dave staggers up. Bulldog by Escondido takes him right back down in prime position to slap on the ankle lock submission.

Suave: THERE HE GOES…ANKLE LOCK! ANKLE LOCK! ANKLE LOCK! TEQUILA SHEILA IN THE RING!

Rahmbo runs over and drops an F-Bomb on her. Dave taps out.

Suave: THAT’S IT! DAVE TAPS OUT!

WINNER AND STILL PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: ‘No Frills’ CHRIS ESCONDIDO

Suave: CHRIS ESCONDIDO HOLDS ON TO THE PCW TELEVISION TITLE…thanks to a little help from…RAHMBO!

Crowd: RAHMMMMM-BO!…RAHMMMMM-BO!

Suave: Well? We’re going to find out really quick what intentions Domination Inc. has. ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin is already in the ring with Tequila Sheila.

MATCH #3 PCW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH: KATHRYN RANDALL COLLINS…aka KRC © (Domination Inc.) vs. ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ TESSA MARTIN w/Tequila Sheila (Joe SixPacks) Suave: Tessa’s still waiting. I don’t know what’s going- WAIT A MINUTE! IT’S QUADRUPLE R WITH A CHAIR!

*CLANG*

Suave: HOLY CRAP! TESSA’S DOWN AND I DON’T THINK SHE’S GETTING UP!

*CLANG*

Suave: QUADRUPLE R JUST DRILLED TEQUILA SHEILA WITH THE CHAIR! AND HERE COMES KRC!

The crowd craps all over this. They are pissed. Debris starts flying into the ring. The PCW Women’s Champion turns Tessa over and sticks her foot on her chest. The referee reluctantly counts it. 1…2…3.

WINNER AND STILL PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: KATHRYN RANDALL COLLINS

Suave: THIS SUCKS! THIS TOTALLY SUCKS. THIS IS SUCH A BULL CRAP ENDING! NO FREAKIN’ WAY…HOLD ON!

Joe SixPack hits the ring. Kevin Scott tackles Quad R and they start to brawl. ‘The Raving Rednecks’ Locke and Loade join in and triple team Quad R.

Suave: HOLY CRAP! REDNECK 4-D DEATH BLAST ON QUADRUPLE R! AND HERE COMES DOMINATION INC.!

Rough Justice…aka D.B. Ruff and Connor Justice- two former police officers fired for their over the top extreme style of justice, wade in with Daisy Cutter-Bomb, Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit. Ruff and Justice taser the hell out of Locke and Loade- they’re out. Big Oil and Walstreit lock up get into a wild brawl with Average Joe and the American Trucker- an old grudge match from a few months back. Joe the Plumber tries to help out but Daisy Cutter-Bomb kicks him in the balls.

Suave: Ah…poor Joe. DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB! DAISY CUTTER POWERBOMB!

Daisy leaves Joe in a heap. Ruff and Justice duel with Kevin Scott. Justice gets the taser on Scott and takes him down.

Suave: HERE COMES DAVE THE MECHANIC!

Dave, still a bit winded from his TV Title match, wheels his battery charger down with him. He grabs the jumper cables and…

*ZZZZZAP*

…down goes Ruff. Justice lunges at him…

*ZZZZZAP*

…down goes Justice. Walstreit Stock Market Plunges American Trucker. Big Oil choke slams Average Joe.

Suave: HE’S GOT HIM!

*WHAM*

Suave: OKLAHOMA DRILLER! OKLAHOMA DRILLER!…”

The crowd suddenly cheers.

Suave: HERE COMES PCW SECURITY DIRECTOR DAWN McGILL!

McGill, with Singapore Cane in hand, runs up to Walstreit.

*THWACK* *THWACK*

Walstreit staggers into the steel guardrail. Big Oil rips the jumper cables away from Dave the Mechanic and choke slams him.

Suave: HOLY CRAP! Dave bounced up about six inches off the canvas!

Big Oil goes for the jumper cables, McGill plants her 4 inch stiletto heels in his groin. Big Oil to his knees.

*THWACK*

Big Oil topples over. Daisy Cutter-Bomb attacks McGill from behind and knocks the Singapore cane away. McGill instinctively whirls around with an open hand and smacks Daisy in the face. She stumbles all the way across the ring. McGill picks up the Singapore cane but gets blindsided by the PCW Women’s champion Kathryn Randall Collins. KRC drives McGill to the corner. McGill kick to the groin with her stilettos stops KRC in her tracks. She takes two steps back and turns around to see ‘PCW Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin standing there- with her oversized pizza box.

*WHAP*

Suave: HELLO! and GOODNIGHT! TESSA COVERS KRC! SHE COUNTS OUT HER OWN PINFALL.

An angry Tessa yells at KRC. Then she takes the pizza box and Arabian Facebusters KRC for good measure.

Domination Inc. CEO Mr. McMann arrives on scene with Whiskey Tango Foxtrot.

Suave: Mr. McMann is not happy.

McMann surveys the devastation of his Corporate group.

Suave: How much do you want to bet they’ll be an emergency board meeting after this? It’s going to take a few minutes to clean this up. We’ll be right back after this commercial message.

Suave: Okay, we’re back. Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit are in the ring. Mr. McMann and Domination Inc. are still ringside. PCW Security Director Dawn McGill is still ringside. And the Schett Brothers are ready to go. It looks like we’re going to have a match.

MATCH #4 PCW TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH: BIG OIL w/Texas Tex and KIRK WALSTREIT- Wall Street Market Analyst with Man Crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit © (Domination Inc.) vs. JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT w/Horst Schett and Hans Gruber- the Extreme German Schnauzer (Progressive Alliance) The bell rings. Big Oil takes one step forward and then climbs out of the ring. Big Oil, Walstreit, and the rest of Domination Inc walk back to the locker room. Again, the crowd craps all over it. Jack Schett stands in the ring with his arms outstretched. The referee starts to count Big Oil and Walstreit out.

Suave: They’re going back to the locker room. And of course, the title won’t change hands unless it’s a pin or submission so Big Oil and Walstreit will keep the belts. And PCW can’t say they no-showed because they were here. But the crowd is not happy.

WINNER: JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT by count out. Big Oil and Walstreit retain PCW Tag Team Titles.

Suave: PCW Title Match next. And just how ready is Kevin Scott going to be after getting tasered by Rough Justice? We’ll find out shortly.

BACK DOOR OF HACK’S RUSTY NAIL SALOONA group of Obama supporters are celebrating. “I’m just…so inspired! I want to make this country better!” The group agrees. “What a great day for America! We are all better people!” More agreement. “I’m ready for change. The old ways weren’t working! We need to all come together!” More agreement.

The back door opens. Former PCW CEO George W, and his father George H.W. leave Hack’s Rusty Nail Saloon. “BOOOOOOOOO!” “NA-NA-NAAA-NAH NA-NA-NAAAA-NAH! HEY, HEY, HEY. GOODBYEEEEE!” A few throw empty beer cups towards W.

Suave: Hmmm…so much for ‘change.’

W and H.W. get into their car and drive away.

Suave: There you have it. The former CEO of PCW, George W, has left the building.

O’Beck Bahama and Justin Sufferable walk towards the ring.

Suave: Kevin Scott is already in the ring and I’ve got to wonder if just 15 minutes or so after getting tasered by Rough Justice whether he can go or not.

MATCH #5 PCW TITLE MATCH: O’BECK BAHAMA w/ ‘Not Just Intolerable, not just unbearable, he is…’ Justin Sufferable (Progressive Alliance) vs. KEVIN SCOTT (Joe SixPacks)Scott leans back against the corner ringpost.

Suave: I don’t know…I don’t know if he can wrestle now.

The bell rings and Scott sprints from his corner catching Bahama by surprise. He takes out the legs and then works an arm bar. Bahama sticks his foot on the bottom rope and the ref breaks the hold. Scott gets up and tries to catch Bahama again. Bahama back body drops Scott right out of the ring onto the floor.

Suave: HOLY CRAP!

Scott lies there for 30 seconds before finally moving.

Suave: I’m sorry, they should stop this right now. He’s in no condition to wrestle.

The referee goes over to ask if he’s okay. Scott nods yes. He pulls himself back into the ring. Body slam by Bahama. Bahama backbreaker and that’s it. The referee calls for the bell.

WINNER AND STILL PCW CHAMPION: O’BECK BAHAMA

Suave: I give Kevin Scott credit for trying. But he didn’t belong in the ring tonight after getting tasered. Next week, we’re back with PCW Extreme Political TV. We’ll see you then.

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