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#The entity has screeched // ooc
dead-silencing · 2 years
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The fucking audacity and entitlement of some people in the tumblr rp community. Oh my lord. Y’all need to seek therapy, and go outside and touch some fucking grass. seriously. 
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runaway-horses · 5 years
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The Ache Is In Your Soul, Not Your Limbs
Word Count: 2,754
A/N: I wrote this instead of a lab report, and I wrote the last 1,000 ish words in the last two hours while drinking black coffee and watching Netflix. I hope y’all enjoy this! I’m not sure how I feel about it.
Warnings: Sympathetic Deceit, angst, injury, mentions of wounds, passing out, pain, I think it’s OOC? But eh. Hurt/comfort. The sides have wings. Please let me know if I need to add/remove anything!
Tags: @a-cure-for-sentience, @pippippippin, (If I missed someone who asked to be tagged in future works of mine I’m sorry, I can’t remember who was on which taglist x.x)
///
Deceit sunk out, dropping the maniacal chuckle as soon as he could. His first time revealing himself to Thomas. It could’ve gone worse, he supposed, but it could have gone better. Of course impersonating Morality was the most difficult course of action; he believed in rigid laws of right and wrong and left no room for the grey area that Deceit usually operated in.
He stood in front of his mirror and studied his reflection.
He didn’t at all mind his physical appearance, but it was novel to be able to look at it. Keeping himself hidden from Thomas meant he existed as a Side without form, not much more than a conscious entity, lacking a physical presence. Or, as physical as one could be as a figment of someone’s personality. He supposed he would have to get used to this new body now.
///
Weeks later, Deceit sunk down into his room, immediately shrugging his cape off and tugging at his shirt. He needed it off, he needed it off, he needed it off-
The article of clothing fell to the floor, allowing the large feathered appendages folded against his back to release. They ached deeply, the muscles spasming from being folded roughly inside his clothes for so long.
Where the wings had come from, Deceit had no inkling of an idea. They had appeared in their fully feathered glory the day after he first revealed himself to Thomas. Deceit sighed and stretched them out as far as he could, trying to ease the ache. He hadn’t signed up for wings when he revealed himself to Thomas. Another unsettling part of him, he supposed.
First the scales, now this.
Deceit had no idea how to take care of wings, but there must be long-term repercussions for repeatedly folding them unnaturally. Did they need to be cleaned? He didn’t know. He didn’t want to think about it. Instead, he sat down on his bed and let his wings splay out around him. They still hurt, but not as much as they had. He pulled out his notebook and, keeping one ear tuned in case Thomas encountered a difficult situation, started to write.
///
Deceit sunk out, his ears ringing.
They weren’t listening to him, Thomas, Patton, Logan, Virgil, no one wanted to hear what he had to say. He was used to it, it was fine, but he had never stayed out with them for so long and his wings were on fire.
He wrestled with his shirt, remembering belatedly that he could just snap it off.
His wings fell out of their position, and the sudden movement had him choking back a cry of agony.
He barely had time to stumble to his bed before the world faded to black.
///
Roman glided to the ground, using his wings to make a graceful landing. Things had been...less than stellar in the days after the video, but he found that a good flight was always good for creativity. The wind ruffling his feathers, the warmth in his face and back, the feeling of weightlessness as he soared high above everything in the Imagination - yeah. It was good.
The calm of the Imagination was shattered quickly, however, by Patton flying in, cardigan fluttering behind him like a cape (perhaps they could do a video with superhero personas? He’d have to write that down.)
“Something’s wrong.” Patton blurted as soon as he was in hearing distance.
“What?” Roman asked, his mind still working on the superhero idea. (He wanted a cape, ok?)
“Something’s wrong, I can feel it, I was in the kitchen baking some cookies when I felt something...flicker out. And I can’t figure out what it was! I already checked on Logan and Virgil,  they’re fine, so I thought it might have been you -even though it didn’t feel like you- but you’re fine! And I don’t know what’s wrong!” Patton was breathing hard, his face red, and whether it was from the running or the intense emotions -both, in all likelihood-  Roman couldn’t tell.
“Easy Padre, take a deep breath.” Roman reached out with his arms to pull Patton into a hug, wrapping his wings around him too. “Whatever it is, we can’t figure it out if you’re passed out. There you go, nice big breaths.”
Patton’s breathing settled to something more regular, and Roman pulled away, though he left his wings loosely surrounding him.
“Now, tell me exactly what happened.”
///
Patton didn’t know exactly what he was expecting Deceit’s room to look like (the Slytherin common room perhaps?), but this wasn’t it.
It looked...normal.
Well, normal except for the unconscious Side lying (ha!) draped over his bed.
Deceit...had wings. Big ones. Black with yellow feathers neatly outlining the edges. They were magnificent.
They were also in awful shape. The feathers were sticking out in every which direction, some twisted around each other, others bent under in what had to be awfully painful. There were raw, bald spots on the tops of the wing joints, right where a shirt would hit. Patton winced in sympathy.
He stepped past the pile of clothes on the floor and approached the bed. Deceit’s wings were twitching slightly and little spasms were visible. Whatever the deceitful Side had been doing, he had taken awful care of his wings. Patton gently ran his fingers through the downy feathers on the underside of a wing and made a face at how dirty they were.
With a sigh, Patton placed his hands on Deceit and sunk them out to the Commons. He’d need his whole family to help him sort out this mess.
///
Roman shrieked when Patton appeared on the floor of the living room, Deceit with him.
Patton was in Dad-Mode however, and did nothing more than wave Roman over.  
“Go get Logan and Virgil, and grab some towels while you’re at it. His wings need to be groomed.”
Roman had so many questions -Deceit had wings? Since when?- but he knew better than to try to slow Pat down while he was in Dad-Mode. Instead he nodded once and quickly headed out to fetch the things that Patton asked him for.
Logan and Virgil had sunk down to Patton, no questions asked, and when Roman made it back to the three of  them with a stack of towels, they were already spreading Deceit’s wings out. They were huge, easily spanning the distance between the couch and the wall, and -Roman admitted begrudgingly- they were beautiful. Or they would be once they were cleaned up.
“Oh good Roman, you’re here. Lay those out under his wings, I think it’s safe to say that he’s going to lose a fair amount of feathers.” Roman helped Patton spread them out, and then he settled himself next to Logan to start the tedious process of setting the feathers straight.
///
Deceit was pulled out of the pleasant darkness that he had sunk into by being jostled roughly, sharp points of pain awakening him fully. He twisted away with a screech -there were hands, hands on his wings, pulling at them, and he needed them off- but the hands didn’t relent, instead tightening their grip. He tried to pull his wings -his aching, sensitive, vulnerable, wings- away from them, but they wouldn’t cooperate. He only succeed in making them spasm again, and he took a deep breath against the pain.
Finally, his senses cleared enough that he could hear the voices murmuring to him.
“Shh, Deceit, stop moving. It’s ok, it’s just us. It’ll be ok.”
Patton. The voice was Patton’s, but it had the opposite effect of soothing. He just pulled harder, wondering why they had invaded his room, his private space. Hands were still tangled in the feathers of his wings, and he finally stopped pulling when he realized that they weren’t letting him go.
“Please,” He whispered, feeling awfully exposed. Hadn’t he suffered enough?
“Deceit, we’re not here to hurt you. We’re trying to help.”
If only that were true. Deceit was so very tired of being alone, of being ignored. His wings hurt, and so did his heart, and he just wanted it to stop.
“Ok,” He whispered, dropping his head onto the carpet. He didn’t believe them -why should he?- but he didn’t have the energy to sink out. They could do whatever they wanted as long as he could sleep through it.
“Oh, ok, good. Just relax, Deceit, it’s...it’s going to be ok.” Patton’s tone was surprised with a hint of something else, uncertainty? Fear? Distrust? Deceit shifted slightly and braced himself.
“Alright so, your wings are in quite the shape. We’re going to see if we can straighten out your feathers, and then we’ll go from there.”
That didn’t make sense.
“What? I don’t understand, aren’t you guys...I don’t know. Going to hurt me? How do you know how to groom wings? Aren’t you freaked out by them?”
The living room was silent (because that’s where he was, not his room as he had thought), until it was broken by Roman’s voice.
“Deceit, I know we have had our...differences in the past-” An understatement- “But we wouldn’t ever harm you.” Roman’s voice was hurt? As if this day wasn’t weird enough.
“And as for your wings, well. We all have them. So our knowledge is of a rather personal manner.” That was Logan, and his voice was calm, calculated as always.
Wait- what?
‘What?” God, maybe Deceit hit his head when he fell. Although he wasn’t quite sure his brain could come up with something as ridiculous as this. Wings? They all have them? “I’ve never seen them before.”
“Well I suppose that makes sense, we keep them invisible while with Thomas. We only have them out when we’re here, in his mind. You avoid the Common area, to the best of my knowledge.” Logan paused for a moment. 
That was true. Deceit stayed to his room as a rule. Deceit let out another sigh, this one relieved, because at the very least he now knew that the others knew what they were doing concerning wings.
“Deceit, we’re going to start straightening out your feathers now. It’ll probably hurt, and I’m sorry about that, but it’s got to be done.” He nodded and resisted the urge to jerk away when his wings were spread out again. Slowly, the Light Sides started the long process of fixing his wings. Each feather was its own point of pain, and it felt like individual needles as they straightened each one that was out of place, many of them falling out as they went.
He didn’t notice he was crying, silent tears slipping out of his eyes, until the carpet had a slight damp spot pressing into the side of his face. Someone -Virgil, perhaps?- reached for a twisted primary to try to straighten it out. It hurt so much more than the others, and Deceit yanked his wing away on instinct, accidentally hitting the two sides on his left with it when he did so.
“I totally meant to do that.” The lie slipped out without him thinking about it, and he winced. “Sorry,” He added softly, trying to fold his wings up and roll away from the four sides. Patton placed a gentle hand on his shoulder and stopped him.
“Hold up there, easy. Don’t go anywhere. We can take a break, but your wings are only going to get worse if we leave them like this.”
Deceit sat up so he could look the others in their eyes. He shifted uncomfortably when he remembered that he was shirtless and tried to subtly wrap his arms around himself.
“Oh,” Patton whispered softly, leaning forward to gently wipe at Deceit’s cheeks, where the evidence of tears was fresh. “You could’ve asked us to stop Deceit, we told you it would hurt but you weren’t supposed to be suffering.” Deceit shook his head and dropped his gaze. He felt weird, emotional and tired, not at all like his usual snarky self. Patton looked past him and said, “Logan? Will you go get us some first aid supplies? We need to wrap those raw spots.”
“I’ll go with him,” Virgil mumbled. Deceit heard them depart, eyes still trained on the floor, and Patton addressed Roman next, asking him to go make them some tea. Deceit was about to ask why they didn’t just summon those things, but he bit his tongue. Patton sat down in front of him, criss-cross-applesauce, and smiled gently at him.
“I’m sorry, Deceit. We didn’t do this right, at all.”
Deceit shrugged. “Why’d you come looking for me?”
“I knew something was wrong, I could feel it. Something flickered out in the Mindscape, and when I realized it was you I was worried that you had been hurt, or ducked out.”
Deceit decided against saying what he was thinking, Wouldn’t you all be thrilled if I left?
“Deceit...how long have you had wings?’
A pause.
“Since I first revealed myself to Thomas.”
Patton gasped softly, and made a strange motion with his hands, like he wanted to hug him, but thought better of it.
An awkward silence settled between them, but Patton broke it again.
“Do you want to see my wings?”
Deceit lifted his head at that, shock written all over his features. As he watched, Patton’s wings manifested in the static space behind his back. They were adorable, and matched Patton perfectly. They were much smaller than Deceit’s, and Patton’s feathers were light blue with green splashes on them, like someone had splattered paint on them. Patton stretched his wings all the way out.
“Would you like to touch them?”
Deceit’s hand was already halfway towards them, and he paused to confirm with Patton that yes, he could. Patton’s feathers were soft, not sticky like Deceit’s. He was still marveling over them when the other Sides returned, Roman balancing five mugs of tea and Logan carrying a small First-Aid kit. They all settled down on the living room floor with Patton and Deceit, all giving him warning looks as he carded his fingers through the downy feathers of the underside of Patton’s wing.
Deceit pulled his hand away like he had been burned and dropped his gaze again. If he had been looking up, he would have seen the glare that Patton was giving the others.
“Deceit, will you be ok with Logan bandaging your wings? The tops of them are rubbed raw and I want to make sure those don’t get infected and give the feathers there a chance to come back in.”
Deceit lifted one shoulder in acknowledgement and slowly stretched a wing towards Logan, ignoring the ache in the muscles from doing so. Logan’s hands were cold when they made contact with the tops of his wings, but his hands were gentle as he maneuvered it how he wanted it.
“Ok, I’m going to clean these, put some Neosporin on them, and bandage them. I apologise for any discomfort this may cause.”
The sting of whatever Logan was using to clean the wounds burned like a bitch, and Deceit white knuckled the fabric of his pants through the whole thing. The cream was cool, at least, and the bandage was soft. He let out a soft gasp when the cotton ball touched his other wing and pressed his lips together tightly to keep any other sounds from escaping.
A warm hand gripped his, and he glanced up to see Roman looking at him. Roman offered him a smile that was tight around the edges, but still genuine. He held his gaze until Logan secured the edge of the bandage.
“There. Finished.” He heard Logan shuffling away, and he awkwardly pulled his wings in towards his body.
“Thanks, Logan.” Deceit offered, glancing over his shoulder. Logan gave him a curt nod, but his eyes were soft. Patton handed him his mug of tea with a smile.
“It’s late, and I’m sure you’re tired. Do you want to sleep down here Deceit? Logan or I can change your bandages tomorrow and we can finish grooming you.”
Deceit nodded, and pretended the lump in his throat was allergies, or the hot tea going down before it had a chance to cool down. And the sting in his eyes was from the residual pain, not because Patton looked at him with an honest and open expression. No, there were no emotions here, his insides were just warm from the tea, not because he had never felt this kind of familiarity. Roman’s hand was still warm on his, and the pain in his wings had faded to a background ache.
“Yes, Patton, thank you. That sounds...wonderful.”
Deceit couldn’t have lied even if he wanted to.
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wannawrite · 5 years
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better better 💛 🐻 🍯
너의 그 사랑만이 멈춰있던 날 다시 뛰게 해.
[ Only your love could make the me who was stuck run again. ]
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TW: if you squint, there's very mild mentions of child abuse, physical and verbal
↪ group: DAY6
↪ member: Yoon Dowoon
↪ genre: idk its not really fluff either, (IM SORRY ANON IT GETS VERY FLUFFY AT THE END) but its 90 percent angst free LOL ??? this story is too out of the ordinary to categorise lol ☀️
↪ request: hey admin n! can i have a fluffy day6 dowoon scenario where he cheers you up from a bad day in school? thank you!
↪ A/N: I really wanted to write something for Dowoon, thank you so much, anon who requested this!! I somehow thought of the spiritual love I receive everyday from God (I'm christian to all of y'all who dk, haha) so I think this story will hold a special place in my heart!!! also, the story plot is largely inspired by the story by 九把刀 - 等一个人咖啡,so if u understand Chinese please give it a read, its a nice story uwuwuwuuwwu
edit i am SO SORRY THIS WAS WAY LONGER THAN IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE the word count will probably be like idk 8000 by the time i finished this when u requested for a scenario lolz i got way too invested I apologise...I wrote almost everyday for a whole week I regret getting carried away oh my gosh, but I hope you enjoy this, I really worked very hard on this!!!
ps im sorry if jihyo is ooc, never written nor know twice well but id say I'm a fan of their music hehe
______________________________________
It was about 7AM in the morning when all of your batch gathered around at the assembly place in your school, and between occasional yawns that slipped off your mouth (thanks, end of year exams), you and your friends were talking about the happenings of yesterday as you walked there, laughter often breaking out in your little group when there were bits of humour in the story.
You all made your way down the stairs and into the assembly grounds, resembling a large, aquamarine blue quilt that took up an obnoxious part of the school-where the netball competitions and other important events were held.
Seemingly following suit with the shade of blue on the ground, the lack of sun in the morning painted everything with a small hint of lighter, sky blue itself, such that it all looked like one entity but distinctive in its own individual colours.
Realising this with your own dark ringed, half opened eyes, you couldn't help but feel the ends of your lips angle up slowly-the world was so beautiful, you couldn't help but think as you knelt down to sit onto the rugged surface of the big, enveloping area-whoever had created it for all its small but still amazing features was exceptionally genius.
As your eyes scattered around the place, still immersed in a world of your own-a shrill screech of a whistle pulled you back to the boredom of school life, and with a slight, but petty annoyance you shifted your back to face the PE teacher who had just walked over, and subsequently, so did the other students around you.
He stood in front of your whole batch, clad in a black, torso hugging sports shirt and fluorescent pink shorts-which immediately, triggered a few giggles for your batch, but the spoilsport of a whistle just had to ruin the fun again, motioning for everyone else to shut up.
You sighed when you saw the creases in his forehead, and the unmistakeable hint of a frown on his tan, oval face-this was not going to be too good of a day.
You just hoped that he wasn't going to make all of you do 4 rounds around the school today. Running, needlessly to say really was not something a person like you liked to do-sweat all over your face, springing pimples on your face, grasping for breath and literally collapsing in front of the whole class like a dead fish because of how energy deprived you were? You were going to pass, thanks.
"Now, class!" his low baritone rasped out to the class, carrying a strong sense of dominance in it like he was speaking to a platoon in the army, "We have a group of alumni today, coming back to visit and help all of you train for your Physical Education Examinations next year." At that, his outstretched wrists flicked backwards loosely, gesturing for the alumni to come, and he continued again, "They are alumni that were our top students from last year, and did exceptionally well. They have all took time out of their 4 month break after examinations to train all of you, so please be nice, and don't be so unruly."
As soon as he had said that, the class started breaking out into applause as the five students stepped into everyone's field of vision.
Your eyes widened when you saw the bones, standing out like rocks in the their toned, fit arm and leg muscles-even the girls' thighs that was supposedly, the most unattractive part of everyone's body had 'walls' lining their lean, hourglass figure. Confident smiles were plastered to most of their faces, with a few tired exceptions-heck, one even had a smirk playing on their face as he scanned the class below him.
Inwardly, as you heard the laughs of the alumni that had aroused from the awing of their juniors below them, you couldn't help but shudder inside-there was no, freaking way that you were going to look like that after training with them.
You didn't want to, anyway-that meant rigorous hours of training and stitches 'basking' under the unhelpful, boiling cover of the sun.
Just then, as you were contemplating the choices of schools you were going to transfer to to abstain from the torture that was soon to come, the guy with the playful smirk on his face had already grabbed a microphone, and was preparing to speak. Translucent frames for glasses hid his small, almost demure but yet somehow condescending eyes-you weren't getting that great of a vibe from him.
"Hello, Class 3D9, I am your senior, Park Jaehyung, and I'm here to train all of you for the exams, since all of you don't seem that excited for it, judging by your expressions." His features softened considerably from a look of mirth to one of gaiety as he started to speak in a 'half air half voice' kind of way-rasping yet not quite, and you rolled your eyes.
It wasn't really that you disliked him much, but you could already picture him being the heartthrob of the girls in class-the gleam in their previously irritant, but now smitten eyes was so undeniably revolting.
They all nodded furiously at the last sentence, and he began to laugh a bit (attracting more squeals from the girls, much to your dismay) before speaking again, this time with the narrow of an eyebrow and a more serious, raised voice. "I know all of you might be thinking that this is very pointless, and stupid. I know. None of you really want to be an athlete in the future, and I understand. But I really hope all of you can treat this seriously, because health in the long run is really very important, and I want all of you to take not only the PE finals but the entrance exam to college confidently, and healthily. Are all of you with me?"
Like how any motivational speaker would have done, there was an applied pressure at the last line, and soon, a long, unenthusiastic 'yes' drawled out of everyone's barely parted mouth.
You snickered a bit at the frown on Jaehyung's face when he heard it-he really should have known beforehand, that encouraging a class didn't consist of just one pathetic speech, and you started to doubt if he had really been from this school.
Let's face it, motivation really wasn't this generation's thing.
"Are all of you with me!" he rasped again, this time yelling into the microphone obnoxiously and poking a hole in your eardrums.
"YES!" the class shouted with increased volume to appease him.
Just please, don't shout into the microphone again, you whimpered inwardly.
At this, Jaehyung looked more or less satisfied (thank God), and with the small hint of a smile, he passed over the microphone to another guy, whose eyes first caught your own. They were delicately angled into the eyes of a fox, emanating a half elegant aura that still seemed to hint 'Let's have fun, everyone!' They fell into small crescents when he started to laugh at Jaehyung's incapabilities to lead the class, and the circles in his lean, rosy cheek bones spelt attractiveness at its finest.
With a sweet smile on his face, he held up the microphone to his mouth and started to talk. "Morning, class! Sorry if Jaehyung sounds like a bit of a drag. I know he has that student leader aura, but you can't blame him, he's always been burying his face in a book during recess-HEY!" The class, including him, started to erupt into waves of giggles when Jaehyung flicked his forehead, a faux anger playing on his arched eyebrows and widened, now not so small eyes. "FINE, fine, I'll stop! Anyway, hello Class 3D9, this is your cooler senior, Kang Younghyun, and I hope to train all of you to success in the exams. Thank you!" Younghyun proceeded to bow with the shy lift of his eyebrows, and everyone clapped.
"His real name is actually Brian, please ignore him." Jaehyung added in with a wink, earning a loud slap on the shoulder from Younghyun (with a subsequent yelp from himself) and more laughter from the juniors, yourself included. Your seniors seemed pretty chill and friendly, not like how you thought they would be.
But sadly, as they were supposedly goofing around too much, the PE teacher blew that stupid, ear-wrenching whistle of his, causing you to jump up in shock again. "Okay boys, lets finish this up quickly." he said curtly, strict gaze fleeting past the two boys and causing their playful charm to melt like ice in front of him.
As Jaehyung and Younghyun simultaneously did a long, 90 degree bow, mouthing 'sorry' repeatedly, you and quite a good majority of your other classmates sighed, inwardly feeling a tad deflated-looks like the rest of the introduction wasn't going to be that fun after all.
The introduction seemed to move past like rusted cogs, at least for just one part of it-the first girl who had greeted all of you sported two round, neat buns at the sides of her hair, complimenting her big, double lidded eyes and her elegantly curved, brightly smiling lips. The corners of her eyes bore a small fragment of the brighter sky above her, gleaming with confidence as she bowed politely, introducing herself to everyone in a more reserved way than the other two. Her name was Park Jihyo, and she had been in dance-which was quite a great feat, since dance was a niche co-curricular activity in your school, but not surprising at the same time, looking at her beautiful figure and slender, well toned arms.
As she talked, she slipped a few jokes there and then mid-conversation, not too much that the PE teacher had to cut in, but attempting to keep the class' attention on her afloat. Jihyo had an unmistakeable pleasant aura that seemed to infect everyone with her laugh, and from the bottom of your heart, you really wanted to befriend her-someone approachable and easy to talk to.
There was another girl next to her who was called Chaewon, with demure, yet youthful brown eyes and a serene smile. Similarly, she too was very friendly and talked with a very laid-back tone-but the problem was, that she talked a lot.
You didn't really mind it much when people talked a lot, but when they overdid it, it got kind of...boring.
Seemingly one hour later, your eyes struggled to remain parted mid-sentence as she went into a trite monologue about how grateful she was to stand here. By the time she was done you felt fatigue wrap around your head like a snake, till a deeper voice was suddenly amplified into the mic.
"H-Hello, I'm Yoon Dowoon, and-"
"I ate ants as a kindergartener." Jaehyung's unmistakeable airy voice cut in annoyingly, causing Dowoon's face to flush a big, rosy red whilst all of you chortled with a louder, more extreme laughter than before-and instantly, you became alive again as the mental image of a small boy swallowing the poor insect with the brightest smile sent you rolling onto the floor.
"He even gave a whole box to his teacher." came a rather unhelpful snicker from Younghyun, further fuelling the laughter and the blush on Dowoon's face.
You couldn't help but admit, that he was sort of cute when he was embarrassed, though-Dowoon had the small, but believing eyes of a child, with two pretty, but not 'big enough that it protruded' kind of bags attached below them delicately. The gentle up curve of the sides of his big button nose was really attractive, and he had semi-big lips that pouted out like the small petals of a daisy.
Seeing Jaehyung's joking, almost condescending smirk resurface onto his face and look down onto Dowoon's expressionless eyes, which now refused to concentrate on anywhere but the floor was maybe, just maybe-sort of sad.
Unlike Jihyo, you couldn't see even a small fragment of the sky in his eyes-it was as if someone had just painted his eyes brown and decided it would stay that way for the rest of the day.
Dowoon was too embarrassed to do anything else, and without even looking up, he passed the microphone to the PE teacher, whose nonchalant expressions didn't seem to care much either.
Inside, a pang of guilt rose up to your chest, and you unconsciously started to frown along with him as you noticed how uncomfortable his hardened features had looked, amongst all the giggles thrusting through his gentle heart.
Being known by 'the guy who ate ants as a kindergartener' to everyone, instead of who he really was mustn't have been a very nice feeling, especially to his juniors-who was supposed to look at him as a superior and a leader figure.
Just as you were debating on whether or not to ask them to stop, a scream broke out through the assembly grounds, shutting everyone up with a magic swipe of its hand.
Of course, it had to be the stupid whistle.
"Are we here to joke, or train? Get up, all of you! We're going to run today." the PE teacher's obnoxiously booming, demanding voice rang into everyone's ears unpleasantly, the catalyst to the small groans of dismay breaking out amidst the class that was already preparing to stand and walk to the field.
"Can you believe he actually did that?" your friends approached you in a fit of giggles as all of you approached the running track, with a new topic to revolve your conversation around.
Just that, this time, you didn't really want to join in.
It wasn't the best of days after all, you thought with a small hang up in the side of your chest. Out of all things, after seeing a poor boy getting bullied by his own friends, you had to do the stupid 4 rounds that all of you did practically every week.
As you braced yourself painfully for the sweating and fatigue that was to come, taking your rightful place behind the white tape attached to the floor marking the starting point- an unusually low cough brushed by your ears briefly, and instinctively, you whirled around.
You saw the big, believing eyes of a child again as you did so-it was Dowoon, and to your surprise, those eyes noticed your gaze and looked back.
Crap, he's really, very cute. you could feel your head lose some of its gravity and your heartbeat accelerating as he proceeded to smile after, the lift of his plump, daisy lips showing off his round, marshmallow-like cheeks.
"You okay?" his deep voice asked you gently, and you nodded with a small laugh, realising how much of a mess you must have looked in front of him for him to ask such a question.
"I should be the one asking you that. I'm sorry for laughing at you earlier."
With that, his smile angled further into a laugh of his own, and Dowoon replied, "It's okay. I'm used to it already."
You could already feel your forehead crease in slight disbelief, as you stared at the sheepish falter in his smile and recalled how unhappy he was earlier on.
"That's not true-"
BEEP!
The PE teacher's whistle had already gone off, and Dowoon, much to a top runner's expectations, was already speeding far ahead of you with a steady, confident pace as his brown curls bounced gently under the force of his movements.
Looking at nowhere but the front, he looked determined to finish what he had started-something you could probably only dream of having.
"What's taking you so long? Hurry up!" the PE teacher yelled at you, averting your attention away from your senior and back to your miserable plight.
You sighed with a slightly defeated energy, giving him a perfunctory nod as you too, began to move towards the finish line.
That is, if you could even make it.
As you ran, you made a mental note to never use that stupid whistle ever again.
________________________________________________
31st December, 2018.
"Se-second place in class? No way, you must have heard wrongly. Second place girls-wise, maybe..." you insisted disbelievingly, feeling the air brush against your throat as you inhaled sharply, hardly able to fathom the news that had just been broken to you.
Contrary to what your stubborn mentality refused to accept, your deskmate Sungjin just nodded again, the smile on his face laced with a small hint of amusement-he too, probably foresaw that you wouldn't believe such a thing.
"I'm serious, man. It came as a shock to everyone yesterday as well." he said, hiding a gentle, but knowing giggle in 'serious'. "You really have Dowoon to thank, look at you go."
You stared at the suggestive crease in Sungjin's big, pretty eyes, not bothering to hide the sarcasm dripping from your smile (very well knowing that someone like Sungjin was capable of playing such pranks on you).
"And where can I get more reliable information?" you demanded, refusing to tear away your gaze from his, and noticing the added pressure in 'reliable', Sungjin couldn't help but break into a more relaxed smile as he lifted his hands up in surrender.
"Fine, go see for yourself, just don't hit me, please."
He pointed a finger at the notice board, littered with numerous sheets of construction paper from all the projects your class had been assigned this year, almost like a peacock's feathers unfolding.
However, there was one paper that stood out from the rest, dull, white and boring-but maybe not so, once the truth was revealed.
In big, bold letters, it spelt:
PHYSICAL EDUCATION EXAMINATION RESULTS: CLASS 3D9.
The thought of knowing your results had thrown all thoughts of replying to Sungjin out of the window as you could hear the squeak of your shoe soles speed across the classroom towards the notice board.
Frantically, as the long table of students revealed a clearer picture of itself to you, you decided on looking at all the names from the bottom to the top-no better way to set yourself up for disappointment than to face it sooner.
It had been a while of panning up, and your squatting legs were getting tired; though knowing full well that you looked the part of an idiot while doing all this. You couldn't find your name anywhere on the board, and as your legs slowly broke its position to ascend further, the anxiety in your chest seemed to rise along with it-what if you had done so bad a job, you couldn't even get a position?
What if Dowoon had seen it and would never talk to you ever again? What would your parents say when they knew...
Just as your imagination was trailing all the way off from your real goal, the truth imprinted in cold, black ink debunked all of the scenarios in your head.
Your name was right next to the position, second place.
"So you weren't lying!" was the first thing you did as you shouted out of instinct from the opposite position of the classroom. As many other students turned their heads to you in slight frustration, you could hear Sungjin's sniggers direct back at you in response, which was yeah, albeit sort of annoying-but nothing could really smother the joy you were feeling at this moment.
Your eyes lingered for a long time onto the placing that you had gotten, and you recalled all of Dowoon's practice sessions with you-how he had drawn out almost 90% of his 4 month break just to train with you after school, how you had nearly tripped over a hurdle on the running track and causing both of you to laugh, how he had made you draw out a meal plan for him to monitor your food intake everyday-you'd never thought you'd say this, but you really, really missed it.
As you thought back to the believing eyes of a small child, looking up at the boundless sea of a sky-the clouds floating past resembling well his sweat glazed cheeks, you realised-how much you'd miss his presence that pushed forward, reaching out to the you who couldn't be bothered with most things, his care that reached out to the you who didn't care for yourself-not necessarily in a romantic way.
The thought of getting Dowoon's number had very stupidly, slipped off your mind amidst all the joy he had brought you, and your good mood was surprisingly diminished by a small tinge of guilt as you returned to your desk.
You regretted it. A lot.
"All those training sessions with her partner must have helped a lot, huh? The one who ate ants in kindergarten, I have to laugh." Suddenly, the silent, but tangible hiss of a group of girls fluttered past your ears, and without thinking, a small sense of anger blazed up in your heart as you stood up with a jolt.
How dare they say such a thing about such an amazing person.
Your chair did a loud, ugly screech against the floor as it happened, and the girls looked to you, slightly perplexed-that was, until you grabbed onto their wrists, and locked eyes with them-with a fire in your eyes that you yourself hadn't recognised.
"Don't talk about your senior like that." you deadpanned, with the motivation of anger that had backed you up well.
Just then, you noticed the arch of your eyebrows, and the anger in your movements reflected in their cowardly gazes, and for a second, you wondered-if the you that was acting like this, was really you.
"Sorry." was all they could manage awkwardly, a sheepish, yet somehow insincere smile dripping from their lips as they slipped away to their own desks-people nowadays just loved to talk about others behind their backs, and you sighed.
Only your love could make the me who was stuck in a rut run again.
_____________________________________________________________
"You got second place in the finals? Okay. Well, good for you, but I don't think you'd come to me just for that." the PE teacher slurred his words sharply, suddenly looking up at you from the bend of his glasses with a dull expression in his eyes. He seemed way more fascinated in the papers lulled over by his wrists than your dumb questions, and in all honesty, it was getting sort of annoying.
The lazy whirr of the fan spun over your head, fitting perfectly into the awkward silence between you and the teacher as you twiddled your thumbs awkwardly, trying to figure out a way to paraphrase such a stupid request-not daring to meet his steely gaze that somehow, stubbornly refused to tear away from yours.
He was right, however; the last thing you'd ever do was to go into the lion's den without an ulterior motive.
No one really dared to talk to the PE teacher about anything else besides school.
Plus, you could already imagine all the worst case scenarios if he was in a particularly bad mood today, and...let's just say that detention would potentially be the second best option.
He really wasn't the best person to talk to.
But in this case...
You looked up at the spinning blades of the fan again, and felt the swirl of cool air blow through your hair gently.
Maybe he was.
At such a comforting touch, you tried your best to ignore the pounding headache dragging you down; and with painstakingly mustered courage, you spoke.
"T-Teacher, do you have Dowoon's number? Like, the one who was our senior?"
Regret kicked in the second you had spoke of Dowoon's name, and you could literally feel your temples and limbs lose all sense of gravity as your reputation crashed to the floor. You could feel your heartbeat go into allegro, pounding onto every organ in your body as the PE teacher looked up with the most unreadable expression on his face.
Sweat emitted disgustingly from your scalp as your chest rose and fell back in waves, failing terribly to compose yourself. This is it, you dreaded your indelible fate that was to come as the PE teacher raised his eyebrows-you were barely standing up already, and you could feel your kneecaps wobble unhelpfully under the tendrils of anxiety.
I'm doomed for life, Dowoon's gonna think I'm a stalker, and-
"Hahahaha."
Laughter rolled out in the depth of that intimidating voice, like coffee spilt over a cleanly lacquered table.
You felt your eyes widen as you looked up at the teacher again, still grasping for breath as your heart refused to stop beating-after all, collapsing on the spot seemed like the best path in such an awkward situation.
Especially when he looked at you with amusement twinkling in the corners of his slit-shaped eyes.
"So, what next? You're asking, me? To help you with your half baked attempt of asking a senior out on a date?" he snarled sarcastically, getting out of his seat and approaching you. The corners of his mouth tugged at a smirk, baring his set of sharp teeth; the jaws of a wolf, that spelt warning at its finest, and in all your shock, you recoiled back.
You didn't think this was how it would end up; no, not like this.
Just then, you felt a hand arrest your wrists tightly, digging holes in your skin.
The pain from the wolf's claws amplified your vocal cords as you screamed, causing all the other teachers out there to look at you from their desks, and inside, you wanted to cry; you had never been humiliated so bad in your entire life.
"In your dreams."
Just like that, with the help of a brute force you were mercilessly thrown out of the staff room, and before you could even put a foot on the floor to stabilise yourself you heard a loud bang behind you-followed by the even more painful sound of the lock seizing the entrance of it.
You got up, slightly blank, slightly hollow, slightly lost-as you walked a bit further, heart feeling heavy with all the baggage in your chest-before the feelings got hold of your throat, and tumbled out through your eyes unashamedly.
You were way too sad to hide any further.
Pathetically, to do all you could to mask the feelings that had crept up onto you, through the not so fair play of fate; you held a wrist to your face as you sprinted back to class, with a scar zipped across it, just as it had done for your broken heart.
__________________________________________
"I'm sorry for what happened today...but I'm happy that senior was able to bring you so far." he barely managed, with his smooth, soft voice that seemed to skim lightly over the atmosphere of the café; just like the soft cream that had been drizzled meticulously over the cup of coffee on the table.
You weren't taking it, the coffee that he had made for you not too long ago. Not really that you had anything against him, no-definitely not your caring, gentle coworker, but you didn't really have the mood to drink anything as of now...You sighed briefly, dusting your apron to keep yourself preoccupied, but still not managing to let off all the steam in your body.
The incident had very admittedly, left you scarred; very literally and mentally. Leftover embarrassment was still tugging at the corners of your heart, begging to be attended to while you tried your best to shrug it off, and walked to the counter to unlock the cashier; the cheery ring of the bell above the door had struck at a rather unconventional time, and a customer was already walking in.
It wasn't very fair that they'd have to put up with your emotional baggage when they were here to get a drink, maybe even to destress and wind down for the day.
"Pil-ah, it's okay, I don't really want a drink as of now." you played it off as calmly as you could, slotting the key into the box and letting it slide open with a click. "You can drink it or something, you don't look too energised yourself."
A disappointed whine echoed back in response to your lousy excuse; there was no way Wonpil was going to believe such a stupid reply, and you could already anticipate his nagging voice as he opened his mouth.
"Heyyyyy, come on...don't be like this, I've known you for so long already. You've got to take care of yourself, even when you're sad."
The last line got you hard, and as you saw the customer's eyes widen in judgement behind her mop of ashy bangs, you couldn't help but glare back at him.
"Wonpil, I said I was okay." you deadpanned with added pressure, however, subsequently feeling guilt crawling onto your nerves after realising how mean that had sounded. His features had softened considerably, with a slightly hurt look in his big, innocent eyes, and you didn't really want to hurt anyone else when you yourself had been hurt enough.
"I'm sorry, just-I'm tired from today." you sighed helplessly, having been pushed into a corner, and being his understanding self, Wonpil nodded back with concern laced in his seemingly nonchalant smile.
After making sure everything was more or less alright, you hastily attended back to the customer, who was looking slightly frustrated with how long you were taking-and after she had ordered her iced americano, she looked a little more satisfied as she took a seat by the table nearest to the window.
It wasn't surprising; the weather today was warm. Lances of golden sunlight had dropped by the café, gracing its interior in its crisp, evening glow, and very miserably, laughing at your bad mood that contrasted with it.
"Are you okay now?"
You turned around to see Wonpil, eyebrows raised, hands rested in the pockets of his apron; and a rare, but serious look in his eyes as he prepared to listen to you.
As much as you didn't want him to worry over you, you knew how stubbornly insistent he was with getting things off your chest, so nevertheless, you opened your mouth-wondering what you had done to deserve his grace at the back of your mind.
"I-It's nothing really, it's just-" you exhaled, breaking into a nervous box smile as you ran a hand through your hair, barely having the right state of mind to continue, "I really wanted to thank him for his kindness and how he cared for my growth so selflessly, but apart from being so embarrassed by the teacher, not being able to do that anymore-it makes me feel so, so bad, knowing that I was never able to do anything for him, because I really, really miss him, and-"
"Don't say anymore. I understand."
You felt Wonpil's hand descend onto your back, like the touch of a small, but pretty little butterfly as it fluttered over the expanse of your spine, caressing it gently and hushing your shaking nerves.
All the thoughts had miserably, coaxed your feelings forward, and without knowing, you had started to cry again as you held your palms to your face-trying your best not to cry too loudly as you let out small, uncontrollable sobs.
"T-Thank you so much." you choked awkwardly, not knowing any better way to express your gratitude, and even in the darkness of your closed eyes, you could already picture Wonpil's relaxed, comforting smile playing on the sides of his face as he chuckled softly.
Just then, a cough cut in, putting a halt to your sobs and causing both of you to turn to the customer.
"Um...I'm sorry to interrupt this moment, but can I have three iced lattes? Please?" he said, carrying a half air, half voice tone-and with the guidance of your instinct your head immediately shot up from your palms.
There was only one person you knew with such a voice-the one you heard when you had first met the school alumni.
"P-Park Jaehyung?" you yelled instinctively, and your own eyes revealed the truth to you quickly-lean, rosy cheeks, big lips, small, droopy eyes, that were now widened into large circles as they stared back at you, with equally as much surprise in his gaze.
"Ohhhhh my! Y-You're the junior that trained with Dowoon a lot, right?" In his hearty voice, he exclaimed almost disbelievingly, but causing you to blush furiously; it was rather weird being so closely associated with him. "And hey, don't be rude-how dare you call a senior by their full name." he added on teasingly, and both of you laughed.
"I think I'll make the drinks for today-you definitely need to catch up with him, someone might be there waiting for you." Wonpil's voice said behind you understandingly, and you said a quick thank you with a smile before walking over to Jaehyung's seat.
"Oh, sorry for my impoliteness, Your Highness, Park Jaehyung, my queen-does this make it better now?" you retorted quickly, with a cheeky smirk on your face and triggering a gasp from him.
"Excuse me? Your audacity? Oh, and by that guy's sound, you sound like you're only here to see Dowoon, how sad-he isn't here, because I'm the most significant out of everyone there." he snickered back, laughing even harder when you stuck out your tongue back at him pettily-but to your surprise, it didn't last very long.
"Jaehyungie-hyung, don't be so mean! I'm here, hi! I haven't seen you in so long, are you doing okay?" a deep voice exclaimed, causing your jaw to drop even further, if that was even possible-and your feelings seemed to arrest all the air in your chest, just for a second-when you once again, saw the big, believing eyes of a child and his kind, untainted smile.
It was the boy that had spent countless hours under the sun, pushing you towards your goals endlessly.
It wasn't just any person, a random school alumni that had came to their transit stop for a while to leave again-it was Dowoon, Yoon Dowoon, of all people that you could have seen on that miserable day of yours.
It seemed almost intangible, yet so palpable as you ran to him, calling his name, as your hands managed to even hug his taller figure again-you could have nearly cried when you felt his bigger palm crash against your back with sincerity, and while you heard Dowoon's deep voice roll out a long string of laughter, commenting jokingly, "Man, I never knew a girl would miss me so much," you sort of wanted to smack him-yet was definitely in awe of the fact that you could hear that laughter again.
You'd never think that you would have heard it ever again.
"Shut up, I'm just here because you got me a second place position in running, loser." you giggled it off coolly, but failing terribly to hide the happiness stupidly written all over your face as Dowoon's smile angled up further, wearing his pride proudly on his sleeve as he gave you a high five.
"Really? Oh my gosh, that's so amazing! I'm so proud of my student." he laughed, childlike eyes widening in happiness and amplifying his innocence. "You deserve it man, you trained so hard for the test-definitely more commitment than I think you would have had."
"Ow, thanks a lot for the last comment, jeez, alright, I know I suck." you jutted out your lips in faux sadness, clutching your heart to your chest-but quickly remembering why you were so happy to see him again, you hastily added, "But thanks anyway, for guiding me. Couldn't have done it without you, taking so much time off your break."
There. I finally said it, you thought happily, allowing yourself a small grin when Dowoon rejected your praises quickly, hurriedly saying, "No, no, I didn't really do anything," and starting to ramble on about how you had done so much more to deserve it-his eyes got even bigger when he was in slight shock, and he looked the part of a small, innocent child more than ever.
"And oh, right." Dowoon suddenly spoke up amidst the topic of running, grabbing your attention. You couldn't help but giggle when he was about to open his mouth to speak, but instead-shut it again and started tugging the edges of his hair, mouthing things to himself with eyes squeezed together tightly-probably a long string of Jaehyung's 'motivational quotes.
A part of your heart fluttered at the purity his very being exuded-he was really, very cute.
But in all your mirth, you couldn't help it-you absolutely had to smack him.
"Yoon Dowoon, hurry up!" you snapped quickly, however with a cheeky smile that showed your real intentions. Dowoon was momentarily taken aback-but his features quickly softened after, when he realised you were joking.
"Sorry for being such a big mess, it's just..." he barely smiled softly, breaking out into further nervous laughter when Jaehyung and Younghyun started to beat his back repeatedly.
"Do you want to go out with us today? We're going to my place further out from the city, and uh...we're setting off fireworks and having a picnic around there and playing our instruments and stuff-" There was probably going to be no end to his rambling if Younghyun hadn't gave him a loud slap on his back-at this point, the creases in his eyes and sheepish box smile showed it all; he was incredibly, incredibly flustered, and to your dismay-also incredibly endearing.
But still, you couldn't miss grabbing the opportunity to tease him. You lifted your lips into a smirk, rocking your shoes against the foot of the table as you cooed, "Aww, is my senior asking me out on a date? I'd love to go with you, aww, Dowoonie..." Everyone in the place, yes, including that grumpy female customer; broke into fits of giggles, raising the atmosphere of the previously still, 'cultured' public place as you chased after Dowoon, who was currently running away from you and ducked his head to hide under the table.
"Haha, why are you genuinely scared? I was only joking, you're so adorable." you grinned cheekily as you saw the blush dancing above his round, squishy cheeks and the embarrassment in his semi opened eyes, "I'll come with you. It's quite timely as well, since I've had quite a bad day at school...You know what, I'll say later. I gotta finish my shift first, Wonpil can't possibly do everything for me." you quickly added when you saw his eyebrows widen in slight concern, and with a good-natured, outstretched wrist you helped Dowoon up from the table; who was quick to stick out his tongue when he saw that Jaehyung and Younghyun were still unable to contain the mirth written across their faces.
"So, I'll see you at 7 then?" he smiled awkwardly, trying his best to ignore them, and you nodded back eagerly as you walked him out of the shop, and into the embrace of the outdoors again.
It seemed so coincidental, that even as Jaehyung and Younghyun had simultaneously tagged along behind the two of you and out into the open, the sun was only blazing through the gaps in Dowoon's curls-girdling the ridges of his shoulders, slicing through the sides of his face and oozing into the crevices of his warm, faith-filled eyes.
You smiled.
The world was so beautiful.
"See you later! Don't miss me too much!" you yelled out to Dowoon jokingly, as he and the other boys got into the small scooters they shared-and after he had yelled back with equal gusto, "Back at you!", the three scooters sped in the other direction; hopefully, anticipating the time where they came back the other way again, because you sure were.
_____________________________
unknown: It's 7 lol have you ended your shift yet?
you: Yeah I have! Are you Dowoon or...?
unknown: No I'm Brian #sike
unknown: Please ignore that, Jaehyungie-hyung took my phone, I don't know what he's doing with his weird hashtags again TTTTTTTTT
you: HAHAHAHA TELL HIM HE SUCKS
you: It's nice to have your number though...it sucked not being able to contact you :( How did you get it anyway?
Dowoon: Yeah hhhh Wonpil told me earlier :) I didn't think you would mind...so
you: Haha of course not! Anyway, are you on the way?
Dowoon: Wouldn't dare to be late, I'm already here hehe ^^
Your head shot up with excitement, nearly screaming as you saw three headlights blaze at you, from the curtain of darkness that had shrouded the city not too long ago. It was around autumn right about now, and you were rather sensitive to the cold-so seeing their warm presence was quite comforting.
Noticing that you were already hanging up your apron and practically bouncing to the kitchen to clean up, Wonpil couldn't help but throw a good-natured laugh at you. "Someone's excited for their first date." he remarked suggestively, cleaning the used table under the illumination of the light bulb hanging above him, and if it wasn't for the distance between both of you you would have probably kicked him in response.
"Shut uuuuup, there's literally 2 other boys goiiiiing." you whined, taking one of the leftover plates scattered across the sink and soaping it,"-The chances of you and I dating just about now is probably way higher than Dowoon...well, at least, I've known you for about a year plus right now, and him, 6 months at most." Wonpil couldn't help but giggle again at the uncertainty in your voice, and pettily, you stamped your feet on the floor.
"There's no way my future partner will be someone as mean as you, I take all my words back." you pouted jokingly, and subsequently, starting to laugh at yourself too-this conversation was going absolutely nowhere.
"Hey, but in all seriousness, I think you should just go. Don't make them wait too long, after all, one of them is your future boyfriend. I'll take care of wrapping up." Wonpil spoke up again, approaching you as he hung the cloth by the arch of the sink, and took the plate from your hand kindly-gesturing for you to wash your hands as he pointed to the tap.
With unmasked gratitude you smiled back at him, washing your hands briefly before taking your phone from the counter, "Thanks again, Pil-ah; and one more freaking thing, before I have to repeat it a second time, there is no way Dowoon is going to be my boyfriend." you remarked strictly, taking your school bag from the seat close to the door and slinging it over your shoulder excitedly-the events of tonight sounded incredibly fun.
"Thank me by inviting me to your future wedding!" Wonpil screamed in his high pitched voice when you opened the door, with the silvery chime of the bell above it-and this time, you really, really wanted to kick him, because outside, in the cold of the night Jaehyung was literally having the time of his life laughing at you and nodding back to Wonpil in agreement (one of the rare times where he actually sided him).
"Boys suck." you groaned pettily as Dowoon, with unmistakeable redness on his face gestured for you to get onto the back of his scooter, and Younghyun laughed.
"Doesn't seem that way with our Dowoonie, am I right?" his unmistakeable fox eyes shot you a small wink, which was sort of annoying-till he yelled smugly, "Good luck on being the first there with extra baggage! Not like anyone ever manages to triumph me anyway."
With that, Younghyun's scooter whizzed off, black coat and black locks fluttering behind him care freely, like how his very personality was-and soon, Jaehyung's scooter whizzed off too, the only thing behind him being his screams of "I'm GONNA BEAT YOU THIS TIME, BRIAN!", and you couldn't help but giggle a bit-the antics of those two were always so stupidly humouring.
"Sorry, they can be a bit of a public embarrassment." Dowoon laughed helplessly, shaking his head, and with a small smile you too shook your head; you were totally fine with them, and you'd even say that having them around was enjoyable. "-Jihyo and Chaewon are actually joining us later, but they weren't comfortable on the scooter, and we need someone to drive our instruments."
He paused for a bit to catch his breath, expelling a small puff of white before explaining, "I hope you're okay with it too-the scooter can feel very unbalanced at first, but I think you can handle it. This sounds incredibly awkward, but you gotta hold onto my waist, or you'll probably fall off within a second of me accelerating. Alright? Don't want to be responsible for your medical fees." Dowoon ended off with a joking crease in his smirk before he tossed you a neon yellow helmet from the basket of the scooter, and you nodded before putting it on.
He thrusted the key into the slot rather vigorously, and soon there was a dull roar from the engine behind you, and at his command, you awkwardly positioned your hands at his waist area. Admittedly, it felt pretty good, however-the coat that hugged his waist was made of soft, thick brown fabric, and it reminded you of your honey scented sheets back at home.
"Ready to ride?" he suddenly piped up, happiness laced in his deep, comforting voice, and you shot him a thumbs up sign.
"Always ready." you answered eagerly, and with a louder roar from the engine than before, both of you sped out towards the moon, that lay on the horizon of the shimmering sea.
________________________
You felt like you were riding on the brim of a cloud as the wind zipped through your hair and your jacket, starting to take flight and flutter violently behind you like kites in the sky. The feeling of being so close to land, yet so far up into the sky was so indescribable-gravity accelerated the thrill in your heart as Dowoon let out a long, unceremonious scream, cheering for the destination that wasn't too far from where you were.
"We're almost here!" he broke into a small gummy smile beneath the mop of his fluttering curls-they seemed to run across the border of his forehead, like running waves crashing beautifully onto the shore of a beach.
However, contrary to your imagination, the river that surrounded all of you in its big embrace was especially quiet-only letting small dribbles of light from the lighthouse float gently above the surface of the waves as both of you moved past, like bioluminescent lily pads that had descended from the glow of the moon. Mountains foreshadowed the road ahead mysteriously, painted in a darker shade of navy than the star speckled-sky above both of you, and the road to the picnic area was long and windy, snaking out into a canopy of trees relaxedly.
"You'd never get anything like this in the city." you said in slight awe, hands slowly finding themselves crawling up to Dowoon's broad shoulders as you dared to hoist yourself up, breaking up from your posture a tad bit, and as you felt one of his curls brush past your wrists, he laughed his slow, deep laugh in response.
"You're cute. I had a friend that didn't live in Busan as a kid, and he lived in the more country area-he would probably protest if he heard what you just said..." His deep voice trailed off softly, seeming to follow the snaking nature of the concrete road ahead of you. "-Nevertheless, I'm happy we're here. It's nice to ride out here with someone."
His eyes, which had now stopped displaying the light of the sun to catch the glow of the moon, was still as warm as ever in the cold weather. With undeniable faith tinting the light that ringed his eyes, half opened submissively and bringing out the semi rosy tint in his bags, the carefree smile on his lips and the uplift of his cheeks resembling floating clouds didn't fail to bring you back in awe again; it was as if all laws of astronomy tailed after his presence, and followed in the footsteps of his unbreakable belief.
"You're really very beautiful." the words left your lips through an airy whisper, and you were too busy staring at him again to even notice what you said until Dowoon spoke up again.
"U-Um...Me? R-Really? Thanks, I guess..." his eyes bore a different spark to it as they drooped shyly, like a mimosa recoiling at someone's touch-and as the truth dawned onto you slowly, mixed feelings of embarrassment and self-blame kicked in a little too fast-you really, really wanted to kick yourself for saying that.
Trying to salvage the situation, you quickly spoke up upon seeing his tilted eyebrows and the embarrassment written on his face. "I-I didn't mean that in a weird way, I'm sorry, not that I don't love your looks-or not that I don't love you any less, i-it's just-" you stuttered awkwardly, brain stupidly failing you at this crucial moment-but being a nice guy, Dowoon just shook his head briefly.
With a small smile breaking onto his face, not fully suggestive; yet not fully chaste, he responded in awe, big eyes widening with more faith than before.
"No, no, please don't apologise, because..." Dowoon spoke with the smile of reuniting with someone again, overly excited to articulate his words properly, "B-Because, I-"
"Dowoon! What's taking you so long, can you drive faster? You're almost there already, hurry up!" Jaehyung's voice suddenly broke through the world that only both of you shared, halting the climax of the story. He and Younghyun were on a higher end of a cliff, where the destination was, and you could already see their hands waving vigorously in your direction. Jihyo and Chaewon had arrived too-you could see two figures with long hair sit on a big red mat.
"What was that you were going to say?" you asked, as the scooter started to move again; both of you had been so immersed in conversation that you hadn't even realised that Dowoon stopped the vehicle to talk.
However, contrary to what you thought he was going to say, Dowoon shook his head almost nonchalantly, losing a bit of the faith in his gaze as he looked down with baggy eyes of dejection.
He squeezed his lips into a textbook version of a smile and talked at a slower pace, this time more scarily composed than before. "I-It's nothing. I don't know if I'll have the courage to tell you again."
The entire trip to the cliff went downhill in a veil of awkward silence, both of you knowing full well in your hearts why such a thing had happened. Wind rocketed past your ears silently, blowing against your ears and hitting against your hair-as if coaxing you to speak, but right now, you didn't know if you had the courage to say anything to him when you had made him sad.
In less than a minute, the scooter had surfaced up the flatter parts of the cliff, and you decided that this was the best moment to speak up.
"I'm sorry if I made you sad or anything." you mumbled awkwardly, stepping out of the scooter and nearly losing your balance-having your feet on the ground after 2 whole hours seemed like a foreign concept to your legs right about now.
Dowoon shook a hand at you almost instantly. "You've made me more happy than I could ever imagine." he said unhesitantly, and this time, smiled at you with a more genuine smile. For a second, you could see the faith of the crescent moon resurface back on the ring of his eyes as he continued, "Just have fun tonight, that's all I ask for."
You nodded back, returning his smile; and with a new, strangely fluttering feeling in your heart you followed Dowoon to the picnic mat, where Jihyo and Chaewon were sitting, dressed in casual clothing-you felt slightly out of place, decked out in your sloppy, mud-speckled school uniform as you greeted them shyly, sitting yourself onto the mat. But thankfully, the girls initiated conversations well-definitely way better than you did, and within seconds, you hadn't even realised that Dowoon had slipped away to somewhere else.
"So, how's life after finals?" Jihyo asked cheerily, or rather, the way she usually talked; it wasn't rare to see that consistent, bright smile of hers plastered on her doll like face.
You didn't exactly know how to answer. "I don't really know. After school today I have that 4 month break that most have, so what happened after your break?" You started to laugh as you realised how you had redirected the topic back to them, and both of them started doing the same.
"Hmm-hahaha-I'd say that college life is still manageable, I've been doing it for about 2 months plus." Jihyo answered, failing to contain her laughter at one point as she squeezed her eyes together endearingly. "Chaewon is entering a polytechnic, so she has about 2 months more to break, same with Dowoon, Jaehyung and Younghyun want to go to a uni, so they're going to college too, but I don't know...like. I really don't know what I want in life yet..."
Her voice trailed off awkwardly, with the fading smear of her chirpy voice, and you couldn't help but relate. Sure, you had a subject combination and you had did pretty good in finals, but you didn't have a certain passion you would shirk everything to chase; not like many of the people in your class, who were already able to aim their arrows towards their target.
"It's okay. I'm sure you'll find it soon when the time arrives, I'm looking for what I want too." you said with empathy, and in response Jihyo nodded politely.
"I suppose."
All of you talked for a while longer, on less serious topics-occasionally breaking out in laughter when Jihyo came up with one of her silly, yet timely antics, and going soft hours when Chaewon showed all of you pictures of her labrador-it was a he, with a slender, healthy body and adorable marble eyes.
After a while of staring, you had only come to realise that the mahogany, soft brown shade of his fur was the same colour you saw, inked intricately in the depths of Dowoon's eyes.
Just then, there was a very coincidental, but hesitant tap on your shoulders.
"Can you come with me?" a low voice spoke up amidst the cooing over the dog, and you looked up, despite already recognising who it was.
This time, his gaze looked a little different; you couldn't help but feel slightly excited as you noticed the enigmatic sparkle that stood out amidst his gentle, brown eyes, taking his outstretched hand and standing up.
"Yoon Dowoon, I'm warning you, if you don't bring her back safely, we will tail after you with bats and split your head open." Jihyo suddenly spoke up with a glint in her big, doll eyes, voice cracking menacingly at the last line-and again, both of you laughed at her antics.
"Don't worry, I won't." he laughed awkwardly, voice faltering at the last line. You couldn't help but notice that Dowoon's cheeks were starting to heat up, but quickly ignored it when he gestured at you to follow him.
Contrary to what you thought it would be, the walk to the destination wasn't very long, unlike earlier on. From the angle of the picnic mat, a loudspeaker in the distance was clearly visible. Next to it were two other figures, Younghyun and Jaehyung-with a bass and electric guitar slung around their chests respectively.
Needlessly to say, you were shocked. "They can play those?" you exclaimed, and with a small nod, Dowoon chuckled gleefully, "Look to your left."
Without a moment of thought, you turned your head.
Cymbals, glinting on the cusp of its dully golden surface like the rings of Saturn, with two smaller drums and a large bass drum positioned at the bottom-it seemed like you were exaggerating, but...
"Dowoon, you can play that? " you cried out, faltering a little at the last word, but unlike how you had reacted, he just smiled like it wasn't that great of a feat to play the drums.
"Not just that, I'm going to play you a song." he responded triumphantly, as he approached the spinning chair behind it and sat down. A smug smile remained on his face unwaveringly as he bent down to pick up his drumsticks, humming a gentle tune between his lips-and you couldn't help but smile, wondering if that was the very song they were about to play.
"This is all for you by the way," Younghyun cut in, a malicious smirk playing on the sides of his lips as you turned to him, "-We have a school recital tomorrow, and we've practically practiced this song till we could play it with closed eyes-but our naughty youngest absolutely insisted on playing this instead of anything else, just because of his-"
"OKAY, OKAY, I think that's about enough." Dowoon shouted obnoxiously, with a slightly annoyed, slightly red look on his face, and everyone started to laugh.
"Take it away then, drummer boy." you said enthusiastically, remaining rooted to the ground in anticipation.
You definitely weren't ready for the moment he started to position those drumsticks of his.
As the guitar kicked off the song, while layered by the low consistency of the bass, you smiled unconsciously as you let the melody hum in your voice softly. It was in A major, a nice, steady rhythm; and more so when a string of clashes echoed from the cymbals, not too far away from where you were-before there was another silvery tap, followed up by what sounded like the rustle of leaves.
Then, as the melody descended down a few keys, Jaehyung rasped gently into the mic, like the soft blow of the night breeze surrounding you.
Every day I lived like I was dead But you
Became the reason For me to get up Once more You made me wanna open my eyes
In sync with the bass, your heart thumped against your chest-and you stared at Dowoon, who gave you a small smile, before going into a rapid flurry of beats yet again.
Just your smile alone Makes me breathe Because of you, I'm Better better Better baby Only your love Makes the frozen me Start to run again Higher higher Higher baby
The reason for all this looked back at you knowingly, with the same spark of faith spinning confidently in his eyes; as if he understood what he meant to you, and then, the night sky seemed to tear down from the face of the earth, and enclasp itself in the centre of his eyes.
I used to never wait for tomorrow But you Became the reason For me to take one more step Not too far ahead You held out your hand to me
Just your smile alone Makes me breathe Because of you, I'm Better better Better baby Only your love Makes the frozen me Start to run again Higher higher Higher baby The bass suddenly made no more sound, and soon, the music stopped with your heart.
"You must be confused now." Dowoon's low voice suddenly whispered at a distance awfully near where you were standing, and startling you; yet resonating so comfortingly in your ears while he spoke.
As he locked eyes with yours, the light promisingly dancing on the sides of his pupils held the lights of the stars in them-still the ones of a child, maybe even believing more than ever; and in all your awe you began to speak hastily, not knowing what to do.
"I-I don't know, I'm happy-and these words are what I've been meaning to say to you for the longest time, you mean a lot to me, and heck, I don't even know if I could have survived running without you, there's no way you could have known-"
"These words are the words I want to say to you too."
Your eyes widened as he said those words hopefully, taking your wrists-and all the signs of red surfacing across his cheeks, with the smiles that only he could have made you smile with; to the unsure, dull gaze you had seen at your first meeting, to the beautiful, starry sky you could barely fathom in the depth of his big, believing eyes.
"I wanted to drop by your school to visit, but I heard from your friends that you were hurting a lot today, so I didn’t end up going." he said quietly, now holding up the wrist with the thin, ugly scar zipped across it and kissing it; at that moment, you could barely believe the warmth that was withheld between every fibre in the soft, pillowy surface as Dowoon looked up at you again. "And I don't want to leave you like that again. Thank you for understanding me with that kind heart of yours, when I could barely have the willpower to train the batch, and bringing me so much happiness."
He paused for a bit, and as if his voice was a conductor, your breath halted simultaneously-before he opened his mouth again, and eagerly said the words that would change your life forever.
"I want to run with you forever."
You could barely contain yourself from crying again when the feelings gushed to your head, came raining down from your eyes as tears, and through all your emotions, you nodded vigorously.
"I want to do the same, Dowoon," you sniffed, barely stabilising yourself as you felt his callused hands land on your shoulders gently, holding you close to his chest, rising and falling in waves-he too, was crying; and you never wanted to leave that place again.
Just your smile alone Makes me breathe Because of you, I'm Better better Better baby Only your love Makes the frozen me Start to run again Higher higher Higher baby
From that day on, both of you ran not only across the running track in your school, but in the race of life, hand in hand-smiles being the breath in each other's lungs, and love being the reason to keep going.
Only your love could make the me who was stuck run again.
______________________
HECK THIS WAS SO CRINGEY AND CORNY IM SORRY ILL EDIT IT WHEN I HAVE TIME LOL!!! ugh I had sm fun tho lol Dowoon is really so precious and amazing aaaa ;;; also, I feel like I was only able to write this so well because of God, who plays the character of Dowoon and way more than that in my life-being the breath in my lungs and the reason to keep going, so really, all the glory be to Him, I have never wrote with such understanding of a concept like love and He really is so omnipresent and amazing in even everything I write even if I don't mention Him directly!!!
hehe I really like this story uwu its not the best and its way too long than it should have been but it will hold a special place in my heart!! to the anon that requested this I'm sorry if u expected a short read with a much more light hearted topic to 'cheering you up after a bad day at school' JHDSJKFHS HAHAHAHA gosh anyway I hope y'all enjoyed this if you even finished it, thanks for your support!! I'm writing this on my birthday so I gotta go sleep now, happy 2019 to everyone!
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wanjeokhaeseo · 5 years
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better better 💛 🐻 🍯
너의 그 사랑만이 멈춰있던 날 다시 뛰게 해.
[ Only your love could make the me who was stuck run again. ]
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TW: if you squint, there’s very mild mentions of child abuse, physical and verbal
↪ group: DAY6
↪ member: Yoon Dowoon
↪ genre: idk its not really fluff either, (IM SORRY ANON IT GETS VERY FLUFFY AT THE END) but its 90 percent angst free LOL ??? this story is too out of the ordinary to categorise lol ☀️
↪ request: hey admin n! can i have a fluffy day6 dowoon scenario where he cheers you up from a bad day in school? thank you!
↪ A/N: I really wanted to write something for Dowoon, thank you so much, anon who requested this!! I somehow thought of the spiritual love I receive everyday from God (I’m christian to all of y'all who dk, haha) so I think this story will hold a special place in my heart!!! also, the story plot is largely inspired by one of the characters in the story by 九把刀 - 等一个人咖啡,so if u understand Chinese please give it a read, its a nice story uwuwuwuuwwu
edit i am SO SORRY THIS WAS WAY LONGER THAN IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE the word count will probably be like idk 8000 by the time i finished this when u requested for a scenario lolz i got way too invested I apologise…I wrote almost everyday for a whole week I regret getting carried away oh my gosh, but I hope you enjoy this, I really worked very hard on this!!!
ps im sorry if jihyo is ooc, never written nor know twice well but id say I’m a fan of their music hehe
______________________________________
It was about 7AM in the morning when all of your batch gathered around at the assembly place in your school, and between occasional yawns that slipped off your mouth (thanks, end of year exams), you and your friends were talking about the happenings of yesterday as you walked there, laughter often breaking out in your little group when there were bits of humour in the story.
You all made your way down the stairs and into the assembly grounds, resembling a large, aquamarine blue quilt that took up an obnoxious part of the school-where the netball competitions and other important events were held.
Seemingly following suit with the shade of blue on the ground, the lack of sun in the morning painted everything with a small hint of lighter, sky blue itself, such that it all looked like one entity but distinctive in its own individual colours.
Realising this with your own dark ringed, half opened eyes, you couldn’t help but feel the ends of your lips angle up slowly-the world was so beautiful, you couldn’t help but think as you knelt down to sit onto the rugged surface of the big, enveloping area-whoever had created it for all its small but still amazing features was exceptionally genius.
As your eyes scattered around the place, still immersed in a world of your own-a shrill screech of a whistle pulled you back to the boredom of school life, and with a slight, but petty annoyance you shifted your back to face the PE teacher who had just walked over, and subsequently, so did the other students around you.
He stood in front of your whole batch, clad in a black, torso hugging sports shirt and fluorescent pink shorts-which immediately, triggered a few giggles for your batch, but the spoilsport of a whistle just had to ruin the fun again, motioning for everyone else to shut up.
You sighed when you saw the creases in his forehead, and the unmistakeable hint of a frown on his tan, oval face-this was not going to be too good of a day.
You just hoped that he wasn’t going to make all of you do 4 rounds around the school today. Running, needlessly to say really was not something a person like you liked to do-sweat all over your face, springing pimples on your face, grasping for breath and literally collapsing in front of the whole class like a dead fish because of how energy deprived you were? You were going to pass, thanks.
“Now, class!” his low baritone rasped out to the class, carrying a strong sense of dominance in it like he was speaking to a platoon in the army, “We have a group of alumni today, coming back to visit and help all of you train for your Physical Education Examinations next year.” At that, his outstretched wrists flicked backwards loosely, gesturing for the alumni to come, and he continued again, “They are alumni that were our top students from last year, and did exceptionally well. They have all took time out of their 4 month break after examinations to train all of you, so please be nice, and don’t be so unruly.”
As soon as he had said that, the class started breaking out into applause as the five students stepped into everyone’s field of vision.
Your eyes widened when you saw the bones, standing out like rocks in the their toned, fit arm and leg muscles-even the girls’ thighs that was supposedly, the most unattractive part of everyone’s body had ‘walls’ lining their lean, hourglass figure. Confident smiles were plastered to most of their faces, with a few tired exceptions-heck, one even had a smirk playing on their face as he scanned the class below him.
Inwardly, as you heard the laughs of the alumni that had aroused from the awing of their juniors below them, you couldn’t help but shudder inside-there was no, freaking way that you were going to look like that after training with them.
You didn’t want to, anyway-that meant rigorous hours of training and stitches 'basking’ under the unhelpful, boiling cover of the sun.
Just then, as you were contemplating the choices of schools you were going to transfer to to abstain from the torture that was soon to come, the guy with the playful smirk on his face had already grabbed a microphone, and was preparing to speak. Translucent frames for glasses hid his small, almost demure but yet somehow condescending eyes-you weren’t getting that great of a vibe from him.
“Hello, Class 3D9, I am your senior, Park Jaehyung, and I’m here to train all of you for the exams, since all of you don’t seem that excited for it, judging by your expressions.” His features softened considerably from a look of mirth to one of gaiety as he started to speak in a 'half air half voice’ kind of way-rasping yet not quite, and you rolled your eyes.
It wasn’t really that you disliked him much, but you could already picture him being the heartthrob of the girls in class-the gleam in their previously irritant, but now smitten eyes was so undeniably revolting.
They all nodded furiously at the last sentence, and he began to laugh a bit (attracting more squeals from the girls, much to your dismay) before speaking again, this time with the narrow of an eyebrow and a more serious, raised voice. “I know all of you might be thinking that this is very pointless, and stupid. I know. None of you really want to be an athlete in the future, and I understand. But I really hope all of you can treat this seriously, because health in the long run is really very important, and I want all of you to take not only the PE finals but the entrance exam to college confidently, and healthily. Are all of you with me?”
Like how any motivational speaker would have done, there was an applied pressure at the last line, and soon, a long, unenthusiastic 'yes’ drawled out of everyone’s barely parted mouth.
You snickered a bit at the frown on Jaehyung’s face when he heard it-he really should have known beforehand, that encouraging a class didn’t consist of just one pathetic speech, and you started to doubt if he had really been from this school.
Let’s face it, motivation really wasn’t this generation’s thing.
“Are all of you with me!” he rasped again, this time yelling into the microphone obnoxiously and poking a hole in your eardrums.
“YES!” the class shouted with increased volume to appease him.
Just please, don’t shout into the microphone again, you whimpered inwardly.
At this, Jaehyung looked more or less satisfied (thank God), and with the small hint of a smile, he passed over the microphone to another guy, whose eyes first caught your own. They were delicately angled into the eyes of a fox, emanating a half elegant aura that still seemed to hint 'Let’s have fun, everyone!’ They fell into small crescents when he started to laugh at Jaehyung’s incapabilities to lead the class, and the circles in his lean, rosy cheek bones spelt attractiveness at its finest.
With a sweet smile on his face, he held up the microphone to his mouth and started to talk. “Morning, class! Sorry if Jaehyung sounds like a bit of a drag. I know he has that student leader aura, but you can’t blame him, he’s always been burying his face in a book during recess-HEY!” The class, including him, started to erupt into waves of giggles when Jaehyung flicked his forehead, a faux anger playing on his arched eyebrows and widened, now not so small eyes. “FINE, fine, I’ll stop! Anyway, hello Class 3D9, this is your cooler senior, Kang Younghyun, and I hope to train all of you to success in the exams. Thank you!” Younghyun proceeded to bow with the shy lift of his eyebrows, and everyone clapped.
“His real name is actually Brian, please ignore him.” Jaehyung added in with a wink, earning a loud slap on the shoulder from Younghyun (with a subsequent yelp from himself) and more laughter from the juniors, yourself included. Your seniors seemed pretty chill and friendly, not like how you thought they would be.
But sadly, as they were supposedly goofing around too much, the PE teacher blew that stupid, ear-wrenching whistle of his, causing you to jump up in shock again. “Okay boys, lets finish this up quickly.” he said curtly, strict gaze fleeting past the two boys and causing their playful charm to melt like ice in front of him.
As Jaehyung and Younghyun simultaneously did a long, 90 degree bow, mouthing 'sorry’ repeatedly, you and quite a good majority of your other classmates sighed, inwardly feeling a tad deflated-looks like the rest of the introduction wasn’t going to be that fun after all.
The introduction seemed to move past like rusted cogs, at least for just one part of it-the first girl who had greeted all of you sported two round, neat buns at the sides of her hair, complimenting her big, double lidded eyes and her elegantly curved, brightly smiling lips. The corners of her eyes bore a small fragment of the brighter sky above her, gleaming with confidence as she bowed politely, introducing herself to everyone in a more reserved way than the other two. Her name was Park Jihyo, and she had been in dance-which was quite a great feat, since dance was a niche co-curricular activity in your school, but not surprising at the same time, looking at her beautiful figure and slender, well toned arms.
As she talked, she slipped a few jokes there and then mid-conversation, not too much that the PE teacher had to cut in, but attempting to keep the class’ attention on her afloat. Jihyo had an unmistakeable pleasant aura that seemed to infect everyone with her laugh, and from the bottom of your heart, you really wanted to befriend her-someone approachable and easy to talk to.
There was another girl next to her who was called Chaewon, with demure, yet youthful brown eyes and a serene smile. Similarly, she too was very friendly and talked with a very laid-back tone-but the problem was, that she talked a lot.
You didn’t really mind it much when people talked a lot, but when they overdid it, it got kind of…boring.
Seemingly one hour later, your eyes struggled to remain parted mid-sentence as she went into a trite monologue about how grateful she was to stand here. By the time she was done you felt fatigue wrap around your head like a snake, till a deeper voice was suddenly amplified into the mic.
“H-Hello, I’m Yoon Dowoon, and-”
“I ate ants as a kindergartener.” Jaehyung’s unmistakeable airy voice cut in annoyingly, causing Dowoon’s face to flush a big, rosy red whilst all of you chortled with a louder, more extreme laughter than before-and instantly, you became alive again as the mental image of a small boy swallowing the poor insect with the brightest smile sent you rolling onto the floor.
“He even gave a whole box to his teacher.” came a rather unhelpful snicker from Younghyun, further fuelling the laughter and the blush on Dowoon’s face.
You couldn’t help but admit, that he was sort of cute when he was embarrassed, though-Dowoon had the small, but believing eyes of a child, with two pretty, but not 'big enough that it protruded’ kind of bags attached below them delicately. The gentle up curve of the sides of his big button nose was really attractive, and he had semi-big lips that pouted out like the small petals of a daisy.
Seeing Jaehyung’s joking, almost condescending smirk resurface onto his face and look down onto Dowoon’s expressionless eyes, which now refused to concentrate on anywhere but the floor was maybe, just maybe-sort of sad.
Unlike Jihyo, you couldn’t see even a small fragment of the sky in his eyes-it was as if someone had just painted his eyes brown and decided it would stay that way for the rest of the day.
Dowoon was too embarrassed to do anything else, and without even looking up, he passed the microphone to the PE teacher, whose nonchalant expressions didn’t seem to care much either.
Inside, a pang of guilt rose up to your chest, and you unconsciously started to frown along with him as you noticed how uncomfortable his hardened features had looked, amongst all the giggles thrusting through his gentle heart.
Being known by 'the guy who ate ants as a kindergartener’ to everyone, instead of who he really was mustn’t have been a very nice feeling, especially to his juniors-who was supposed to look at him as a superior and a leader figure.
Just as you were debating on whether or not to ask them to stop, a scream broke out through the assembly grounds, shutting everyone up with a magic swipe of its hand.
Of course, it had to be the stupid whistle.
“Are we here to joke, or train? Get up, all of you! We’re going to run today.” the PE teacher’s obnoxiously booming, demanding voice rang into everyone’s ears unpleasantly, the catalyst to the small groans of dismay breaking out amidst the class that was already preparing to stand and walk to the field.
“Can you believe he actually did that?” your friends approached you in a fit of giggles as all of you approached the running track, with a new topic to revolve your conversation around.
Just that, this time, you didn’t really want to join in.
It wasn’t the best of days after all, you thought with a small hang up in the side of your chest. Out of all things, after seeing a poor boy getting bullied by his own friends, you had to do the stupid 4 rounds that all of you did practically every week.
As you braced yourself painfully for the sweating and fatigue that was to come, taking your rightful place behind the white tape attached to the floor marking the starting point- an unusually low cough brushed by your ears briefly, and instinctively, you whirled around.
You saw the big, believing eyes of a child again as you did so-it was Dowoon, and to your surprise, those eyes noticed your gaze and looked back.
Crap, he’s really, very cute. you could feel your head lose some of its gravity and your heartbeat accelerating as he proceeded to smile after, the lift of his plump, daisy lips showing off his round, marshmallow-like cheeks.
“You okay?” his deep voice asked you gently, and you nodded with a small laugh, realising how much of a mess you must have looked in front of him for him to ask such a question.
“I should be the one asking you that. I’m sorry for laughing at you earlier.”
With that, his smile angled further into a laugh of his own, and Dowoon replied, “It’s okay. I’m used to it already.”
You could already feel your forehead crease in slight disbelief, as you stared at the sheepish falter in his smile and recalled how unhappy he was earlier on.
“That’s not true-”
BEEP!
The PE teacher’s whistle had already gone off, and Dowoon, much to a top runner’s expectations, was already speeding far ahead of you with a steady, confident pace as his brown curls bounced gently under the force of his movements.
Looking at nowhere but the front, he looked determined to finish what he had started-something you could probably only dream of having.
“What’s taking you so long? Hurry up!” the PE teacher yelled at you, averting your attention away from your senior and back to your miserable plight.
You sighed with a slightly defeated energy, giving him a perfunctory nod as you too, began to move towards the finish line.
That is, if you could even make it.
As you ran, you made a mental note to never use that stupid whistle ever again.
________________________________________________
31st December, 2018.
“Se-second place in class? No way, you must have heard wrongly. Second place girls-wise, maybe…” you insisted disbelievingly, feeling the air brush against your throat as you inhaled sharply, hardly able to fathom the news that had just been broken to you.
Contrary to what your stubborn mentality refused to accept, your deskmate Sungjin just nodded again, the smile on his face laced with a small hint of amusement-he too, probably foresaw that you wouldn’t believe such a thing.
“I’m serious, man. It came as a shock to everyone yesterday as well.” he said, hiding a gentle, but knowing giggle in 'serious’. “You really have Dowoon to thank, look at you go.”
You stared at the suggestive crease in Sungjin’s big, pretty eyes, not bothering to hide the sarcasm dripping from your smile (very well knowing that someone like Sungjin was capable of playing such pranks on you).
“And where can I get more reliable information?” you demanded, refusing to tear away your gaze from his, and noticing the added pressure in 'reliable’, Sungjin couldn’t help but break into a more relaxed smile as he lifted his hands up in surrender.
“Fine, go see for yourself, just don’t hit me, please.”
He pointed a finger at the notice board, littered with numerous sheets of construction paper from all the projects your class had been assigned this year, almost like a peacock’s feathers unfolding.
However, there was one paper that stood out from the rest, dull, white and boring-but maybe not so, once the truth was revealed.
In big, bold letters, it spelt:
PHYSICAL EDUCATION EXAMINATION RESULTS: CLASS 3D9.
The thought of knowing your results had thrown all thoughts of replying to Sungjin out of the window as you could hear the squeak of your shoe soles speed across the classroom towards the notice board.
Frantically, as the long table of students revealed a clearer picture of itself to you, you decided on looking at all the names from the bottom to the top-no better way to set yourself up for disappointment than to face it sooner.
It had been a while of panning up, and your squatting legs were getting tired; though knowing full well that you looked the part of an idiot while doing all this. You couldn’t find your name anywhere on the board, and as your legs slowly broke its position to ascend further, the anxiety in your chest seemed to rise along with it-what if you had done so bad a job, you couldn’t even get a position?
What if Dowoon had seen it and would never talk to you ever again? What would your parents say when they knew…
Just as your imagination was trailing all the way off from your real goal, the truth imprinted in cold, black ink debunked all of the scenarios in your head.
Your name was right next to the position, second place.
“So you weren’t lying!” was the first thing you did as you shouted out of instinct from the opposite position of the classroom. As many other students turned their heads to you in slight frustration, you could hear Sungjin’s sniggers direct back at you in response, which was yeah, albeit sort of annoying-but nothing could really smother the joy you were feeling at this moment.
Your eyes lingered for a long time onto the placing that you had gotten, and you recalled all of Dowoon’s practice sessions with you-how he had drawn out almost 90% of his 4 month break just to train with you after school, how you had nearly tripped over a hurdle on the running track and causing both of you to laugh, how he had made you draw out a meal plan for him to monitor your food intake everyday-you’d never thought you’d say this, but you really, really missedit.
As you thought back to the believing eyes of a small child, looking up at the boundless sea of a sky-the clouds floating past resembling well his sweat glazed cheeks, you realised-how much you’d miss his presence that pushed forward, reaching out to the you who couldn’t be bothered with most things, his care that reached out to the you who didn’t care for yourself-not necessarily in a romantic way.
The thought of getting Dowoon’s number had very stupidly, slipped off your mind amidst all the joy he had brought you, and your good mood was surprisingly diminished by a small tinge of guilt as you returned to your desk.
You regretted it. A lot.
“All those training sessions with her partner must have helped a lot, huh? The one who ate ants in kindergarten, I have to laugh.” Suddenly, the silent, but tangible hiss of a group of girls fluttered past your ears, and without thinking, a small sense of anger blazed up in your heart as you stood up with a jolt.
How dare they say such a thing about such an amazing person.
Your chair did a loud, ugly screech against the floor as it happened, and the girls looked to you, slightly perplexed-that was, until you grabbed onto their wrists, and locked eyes with them-with a fire in your eyes that you yourself hadn’t recognised.
“Don’t talk about your senior like that.” you deadpanned, with the motivation of anger that had backed you up well.
Just then, you noticed the arch of your eyebrows, and the anger in your movements reflected in their cowardly gazes, and for a second, you wondered-if the you that was acting like this, was really you.
“Sorry.” was all they could manage awkwardly, a sheepish, yet somehow insincere smile dripping from their lips as they slipped away to their own desks-people nowadays just loved to talk about others behind their backs, and you sighed.
Only your love could make the me who was stuck in a rut run again.
_____________________________________________________________
“You got second place in the finals? Okay. Well, good for you, but I don’t think you’d come to me just for that.” the PE teacher slurred his words sharply, suddenly looking up at you from the bend of his glasses with a dull expression in his eyes. He seemed way more fascinated in the papers lulled over by his wrists than your dumb questions, and in all honesty, it was getting sort of annoying.
The lazy whirr of the fan spun over your head, fitting perfectly into the awkward silence between you and the teacher as you twiddled your thumbs awkwardly, trying to figure out a way to paraphrase such a stupid request-not daring to meet his steely gaze that somehow, stubbornly refused to tear away from yours.
He was right, however; the last thing you’d ever do was to go into the lion’s den without an ulterior motive.
No one really dared to talk to the PE teacher about anything else besides school.
Plus, you could already imagine all the worst case scenarios if he was in a particularly bad mood today, and…let’s just say that detention would potentially be the second best option.
He really wasn’t the best person to talk to.
But in this case…
You looked up at the spinning blades of the fan again, and felt the swirl of cool air blow through your hair gently.
Maybe he was.
At such a comforting touch, you tried your best to ignore the pounding headache dragging you down; and with painstakingly mustered courage, you spoke.
“T-Teacher, do you have Dowoon’s number? Like, the one who was our senior?”
Regret kicked in the second you had spoke of Dowoon’s name, and you could literally feel your temples and limbs lose all sense of gravity as your reputation crashed to the floor. You could feel your heartbeat go into allegro, pounding onto every organ in your body as the PE teacher looked up with the most unreadable expression on his face.
Sweat emitted disgustingly from your scalp as your chest rose and fell back in waves, failing terribly to compose yourself. This is it, you dreaded your indelible fate that was to come as the PE teacher raised his eyebrows-you were barely standing up already, and you could feel your kneecaps wobble unhelpfully under the tendrils of anxiety.
I’m doomed for life, Dowoon’s gonna think I’m a stalker, and-
“Hahahaha.”
Laughter rolled out in the depth of that intimidating voice, like coffee spilt over a cleanly lacquered table.
You felt your eyes widen as you looked up at the teacher again, still grasping for breath as your heart refused to stop beating-after all, collapsing on the spot seemed like the best path in such an awkward situation.
Especially when he looked at you with amusement twinkling in the corners of his slit-shaped eyes.
“So, what next? You’re asking, me? To help you with your half baked attempt of asking a senior out on a date?” he snarled sarcastically, getting out of his seat and approaching you. The corners of his mouth tugged at a smirk, baring his set of sharp teeth; the jaws of a wolf, that spelt warning at its finest, and in all your shock, you recoiled back.
You didn’t think this was how it would end up; no, not like this.
Just then, you felt a hand arrest your wrists tightly, digging holes in your skin.
The pain from the wolf’s claws amplified your vocal cords as you screamed, causing all the other teachers out there to look at you from their desks, and inside, you wanted to cry; you had never been humiliated so bad in your entire life.
“In your dreams.”
Just like that, with the help of a brute force you were mercilessly thrown out of the staff room, and before you could even put a foot on the floor to stabilise yourself you heard a loud bang behind you-followed by the even more painful sound of the lock seizing the entrance of it.
You got up, slightly blank, slightly hollow, slightly lost-as you walked a bit further, heart feeling heavy with all the baggage in your chest-before the feelings got hold of your throat, and tumbled out through your eyes unashamedly.
You were way too sad to hide any further.
Pathetically, to do all you could to mask the feelings that had crept up onto you, through the not so fair play of fate; you held a wrist to your face as you sprinted back to class, with a scar zipped across it, just as it had done for your broken heart.
__________________________________________
“I’m sorry for what happened today…but I’m happy that senior was able to bring you so far.” he barely managed, with his smooth, soft voice that seemed to skim lightly over the atmosphere of the café; just like the soft cream that had been drizzled meticulously over the cup of coffee on the table.
You weren’t taking it, the coffee that he had made for you not too long ago. Not really that you had anything against him, no-definitely not your caring, gentle coworker, but you didn’t really have the mood to drink anything as of now…You sighed briefly, dusting your apron to keep yourself preoccupied, but still not managing to let off all the steam in your body.
The incident had very admittedly, left you scarred; very literally and mentally. Leftover embarrassment was still tugging at the corners of your heart, begging to be attended to while you tried your best to shrug it off, and walked to the counter to unlock the cashier; the cheery ring of the bell above the door had struck at a rather unconventional time, and a customer was already walking in.
It wasn’t very fair that they’d have to put up with your emotional baggage when they were here to get a drink, maybe even to destress and wind down for the day.
“Pil-ah, it’s okay, I don’t really want a drink as of now.” you played it off as calmly as you could, slotting the key into the box and letting it slide open with a click. “You can drink it or something, you don’t look too energised yourself.”
A disappointed whine echoed back in response to your lousy excuse; there was no way Wonpil was going to believe such a stupid reply, and you could already anticipate his nagging voice as he opened his mouth.
“Heyyyyy, come on…don’t be like this, I’ve known you for so long already. You’ve got to take care of yourself, even when you’re sad.”
The last line got you hard, and as you saw the customer’s eyes widen in judgement behind her mop of ashy bangs, you couldn’t help but glare back at him.
“Wonpil, I said I was okay.” you deadpanned with added pressure, however, subsequently feeling guilt crawling onto your nerves after realising how mean that had sounded. His features had softened considerably, with a slightly hurt look in his big, innocent eyes, and you didn’t really want to hurt anyone else when you yourself had been hurt enough.
“I’m sorry, just-I’m tired from today.” you sighed helplessly, having been pushed into a corner, and being his understanding self, Wonpil nodded back with concern laced in his seemingly nonchalant smile.
After making sure everything was more or less alright, you hastily attended back to the customer, who was looking slightly frustrated with how long you were taking-and after she had ordered her iced americano, she looked a little more satisfied as she took a seat by the table nearest to the window.
It wasn’t surprising; the weather today was warm. Lances of golden sunlight had dropped by the café, gracing its interior in its crisp, evening glow, and very miserably, laughing at your bad mood that contrasted with it.
“Are you okay now?”
You turned around to see Wonpil, eyebrows raised, hands rested in the pockets of his apron; and a rare, but serious look in his eyes as he prepared to listen to you.
As much as you didn’t want him to worry over you, you knew how stubbornly insistent he was with getting things off your chest, so nevertheless, you opened your mouth-wondering what you had done to deserve his grace at the back of your mind.
“I-It’s nothing really, it’s just-” you exhaled, breaking into a nervous box smile as you ran a hand through your hair, barely having the right state of mind to continue, “I really wanted to thank him for his kindness and how he cared for my growth so selflessly, but apart from being so embarrassed by the teacher, not being able to do that anymore-it makes me feel so, so bad, knowing that I was never able to do anything for him, because I really, really miss him, and-”
“Don’t say anymore. I understand.”
You felt Wonpil’s hand descend onto your back, like the touch of a small, but pretty little butterfly as it fluttered over the expanse of your spine, caressing it gently and hushing your shaking nerves.
All the thoughts had miserably, coaxed your feelings forward, and without knowing, you had started to cry again as you held your palms to your face-trying your best not to cry too loudly as you let out small, uncontrollable sobs.
“T-Thank you so much.” you choked awkwardly, not knowing any better way to express your gratitude, and even in the darkness of your closed eyes, you could already picture Wonpil’s relaxed, comforting smile playing on the sides of his face as he chuckled softly.
Just then, a cough cut in, putting a halt to your sobs and causing both of you to turn to the customer.
“Um…I’m sorry to interrupt this moment, but can I have three iced lattes? Please?” he said, carrying a half air, half voice tone-and with the guidance of your instinct your head immediately shot up from your palms.
There was only one person you knew with such a voice-the one you heard when you had first met the school alumni.
“P-Park Jaehyung?” you yelled instinctively, and your own eyes revealed the truth to you quickly-lean, rosy cheeks, big lips, small, droopy eyes, that were now widened into large circles as they stared back at you, with equally as much surprise in his gaze.
“Ohhhhh my! Y-You’re the junior that trained with Dowoon a lot, right?” In his hearty voice, he exclaimed almost disbelievingly, but causing you to blush furiously; it was rather weird being so closely associated with him. “And hey, don’t be rude-how dare you call a senior by their full name.” he added on teasingly, and both of you laughed.
“I think I’ll make the drinks for today-you definitely need to catch up with him, someone might be there waiting for you.” Wonpil’s voice said behind you understandingly, and you said a quick thank you with a smile before walking over to Jaehyung’s seat.
“Oh, sorry for my impoliteness, Your Highness, Park Jaehyung, my queen-does this make it better now?” you retorted quickly, with a cheeky smirk on your face and triggering a gasp from him.
“Excuse me? Your audacity? Oh, and by that guy’s sound, you sound like you’re only here to see Dowoon, how sad-he isn’t here, because I’m the most significant out of everyone there.” he snickered back, laughing even harder when you stuck out your tongue back at him pettily-but to your surprise, it didn’t last very long.
“Jaehyungie-hyung, don’t be so mean! I’m here, hi! I haven’t seen you in so long, are you doing okay?” a deep voice exclaimed, causing your jaw to drop even further, if that was even possible-and your feelings seemed to arrest all the air in your chest, just for a second-when you once again, saw the big, believing eyes of a child and his kind, untainted smile.
It was the boy that had spent countless hours under the sun, pushing you towards your goals endlessly.
It wasn’t just any person, a random school alumni that had came to their transit stop for a while to leave again-it was Dowoon, Yoon Dowoon, of all people that you could have seen on that miserable day of yours.
It seemed almost intangible, yet so palpable as you ran to him, calling his name, as your hands managed to even hug his taller figure again-you could have nearly cried when you felt his bigger palm crash against your back with sincerity, and while you heard Dowoon’s deep voice roll out a long string of laughter, commenting jokingly, “Man, I never knew a girl would miss me so much,” you sort of wanted to smack him-yet was definitely in awe of the fact that you could hear that laughter again.
You’d never think that you would have heard it ever again.
“Shut up, I’m just here because you got me a second place position in running, loser.” you giggled it off coolly, but failing terribly to hide the happiness stupidly written all over your face as Dowoon’s smile angled up further, wearing his pride proudly on his sleeve as he gave you a high five.
“Really? Oh my gosh, that’s so amazing! I’m so proud of my student.” he laughed, childlike eyes widening in happiness and amplifying his innocence. “You deserve it man, you trained so hard for the test-definitely more commitment than I think you would have had.”
“Ow, thanks a lot for the last comment, jeez, alright, I know I suck.” you jutted out your lips in faux sadness, clutching your heart to your chest-but quickly remembering why you were so happy to see him again, you hastily added, “But thanks anyway, for guiding me. Couldn’t have done it without you, taking so much time off your break.”
There. I finally said it, you thought happily, allowing yourself a small grin when Dowoon rejected your praises quickly, hurriedly saying, “No, no, I didn’t really do anything,” and starting to ramble on about how you had done so much more to deserve it-his eyes got even bigger when he was in slight shock, and he looked the part of a small, innocent child more than ever.
“And oh, right.” Dowoon suddenly spoke up amidst the topic of running, grabbing your attention. You couldn’t help but giggle when he was about to open his mouth to speak, but instead-shut it again and started tugging the edges of his hair, mouthing things to himself with eyes squeezed together tightly-probably a long string of Jaehyung’s 'motivational quotes.
A part of your heart fluttered at the purity his very being exuded-he was really, very cute.
But in all your mirth, you couldn’t help it-you absolutely had to smack him.
“Yoon Dowoon, hurry up!” you snapped quickly, however with a cheeky smile that showed your real intentions. Dowoon was momentarily taken aback-but his features quickly softened after, when he realised you were joking.
“Sorry for being such a big mess, it’s just…” he barely smiled softly, breaking out into further nervous laughter when Jaehyung and Younghyun started to beat his back repeatedly.
“Do you want to go out with us today? We’re going to my place further out from the city, and uh…we’re setting off fireworks and having a picnic around there and playing our instruments and stuff-” There was probably going to be no end to his rambling if Younghyun hadn’t gave him a loud slap on his back-at this point, the creases in his eyes and sheepish box smile showed it all; he was incredibly, incredibly flustered, and to your dismay-also incredibly endearing.
But still, you couldn’t miss grabbing the opportunity to tease him. You lifted your lips into a smirk, rocking your shoes against the foot of the table as you cooed, “Aww, is my senior asking me out on a date? I’d love to go with you, aww, Dowoonie…” Everyone in the place, yes, including that grumpy female customer; broke into fits of giggles, raising the atmosphere of the previously still, 'cultured’ public place as you chased after Dowoon, who was currently running away from you and ducked his head to hide under the table.
“Haha, why are you genuinely scared? I was only joking, you’re so adorable.” you grinned cheekily as you saw the blush dancing above his round, squishy cheeks and the embarrassment in his semi opened eyes, “I’ll come with you. It’s quite timely as well, since I’ve had quite a bad day at school…You know what, I’ll say later. I gotta finish my shift first, Wonpil can’t possibly do everything for me.” you quickly added when you saw his eyebrows widen in slight concern, and with a good-natured, outstretched wrist you helped Dowoon up from the table; who was quick to stick out his tongue when he saw that Jaehyung and Younghyun were still unable to contain the mirth written across their faces.
“So, I’ll see you at 7 then?” he smiled awkwardly, trying his best to ignore them, and you nodded back eagerly as you walked him out of the shop, and into the embrace of the outdoors again.
It seemed so coincidental, that even as Jaehyung and Younghyun had simultaneously tagged along behind the two of you and out into the open, the sun was only blazing through the gaps in Dowoon’s curls-girdling the ridges of his shoulders, slicing through the sides of his face and oozing into the crevices of his warm, faith-filled eyes.
You smiled.
The world was so beautiful.
“See you later! Don’t miss me too much!” you yelled out to Dowoon jokingly, as he and the other boys got into the small scooters they shared-and after he had yelled back with equal gusto, “Back at you!”, the three scooters sped in the other direction; hopefully, anticipating the time where they came back the other way again, because you sure were.
_____________________________
unknown: It’s 7 lol have you ended your shift yet?
you: Yeah I have! Are you Dowoon or…?
unknown: No I’m Brian #sike
unknown: Please ignore that, Jaehyungie-hyung took my phone, I don’t know what he’s doing with his weird hashtags again TTTTTTTTT
you: HAHAHAHA TELL HIM HE SUCKS
you: It’s nice to have your number though…it sucked not being able to contact you :( How did you get it anyway?
Dowoon: Yeah hhhh Wonpil told me earlier :) I didn’t think you would mind…so
you: Haha of course not! Anyway, are you on the way?
Dowoon: Wouldn’t dare to be late, I’m already here hehe ^^
Your head shot up with excitement, nearly screaming as you saw three headlights blaze at you, from the curtain of darkness that had shrouded the city not too long ago. It was around autumn right about now, and you were rather sensitive to the cold-so seeing their warm presence was quite comforting.
Noticing that you were already hanging up your apron and practically bouncing to the kitchen to clean up, Wonpil couldn’t help but throw a good-natured laugh at you. “Someone’s excited for their first date.” he remarked suggestively, cleaning the used table under the illumination of the light bulb hanging above him, and if it wasn’t for the distance between both of you you would have probably kicked him in response.
“Shut uuuuup, there’s literally 2 other boys goiiiiing.” you whined, taking one of the leftover plates scattered across the sink and soaping it,“-The chances of you and I dating just about now is probably way higher than Dowoon…well, at least, I’ve known you for about a year plus right now, and him, 6 months at most.” Wonpil couldn’t help but giggle again at the uncertainty in your voice, and pettily, you stamped your feet on the floor.
“There’s no way my future partner will be someone as mean as you, I take all my words back.” you pouted jokingly, and subsequently, starting to laugh at yourself too-this conversation was going absolutely nowhere.
“Hey, but in all seriousness, I think you should just go. Don’t make them wait too long, after all, one of them is your future boyfriend. I’ll take care of wrapping up.” Wonpil spoke up again, approaching you as he hung the cloth by the arch of the sink, and took the plate from your hand kindly-gesturing for you to wash your hands as he pointed to the tap.
With unmasked gratitude you smiled back at him, washing your hands briefly before taking your phone from the counter, “Thanks again, Pil-ah; and one more freaking thing, before I have to repeat it a second time, there is no way Dowoon is going to be my boyfriend.” you remarked strictly, taking your school bag from the seat close to the door and slinging it over your shoulder excitedly-the events of tonight sounded incredibly fun.
“Thank me by inviting me to your future wedding!” Wonpil screamed in his high pitched voice when you opened the door, with the silvery chime of the bell above it-and this time, you really, really wanted to kick him, because outside, in the cold of the night Jaehyung was literally having the time of his life laughing at you and nodding back to Wonpil in agreement (one of the rare times where he actually sided him).
“Boys suck.” you groaned pettily as Dowoon, with unmistakeable redness on his face gestured for you to get onto the back of his scooter, and Younghyun laughed.
“Doesn’t seem that way with our Dowoonie, am I right?” his unmistakeable fox eyes shot you a small wink, which was sort of annoying-till he yelled smugly, “Good luck on being the first there with extra baggage! Not like anyone ever manages to triumph me anyway.”
With that, Younghyun’s scooter whizzed off, black coat and black locks fluttering behind him care freely, like how his very personality was-and soon, Jaehyung’s scooter whizzed off too, the only thing behind him being his screams of “I’m GONNA BEAT YOU THIS TIME, BRIAN!”, and you couldn’t help but giggle a bit-the antics of those two were always so stupidly humouring.
“Sorry, they can be a bit of a public embarrassment.” Dowoon laughed helplessly, shaking his head, and with a small smile you too shook your head; you were totally fine with them, and you’d even say that having them around was enjoyable. “-Jihyo and Chaewon are actually joining us later, but they weren’t comfortable on the scooter, and we need someone to drive our instruments.”
He paused for a bit to catch his breath, expelling a small puff of white before explaining, “I hope you’re okay with it too-the scooter can feel very unbalanced at first, but I think you can handle it. This sounds incredibly awkward, but you gotta hold onto my waist, or you’ll probably fall off within a second of me accelerating. Alright? Don’t want to be responsible for your medical fees.” Dowoon ended off with a joking crease in his smirk before he tossed you a neon yellow helmet from the basket of the scooter, and you nodded before putting it on.
He thrusted the key into the slot rather vigorously, and soon there was a dull roar from the engine behind you, and at his command, you awkwardly positioned your hands at his waist area. Admittedly, it felt pretty good, however-the coat that hugged his waist was made of soft, thick brown fabric, and it reminded you of your honey scented sheets back at home.
“Ready to ride?” he suddenly piped up, happiness laced in his deep, comforting voice, and you shot him a thumbs up sign.
“Always ready.” you answered eagerly, and with a louder roar from the engine than before, both of you sped out towards the moon, that lay on the horizon of the shimmering sea.
________________________
You felt like you were riding on the brim of a cloud as the wind zipped through your hair and your jacket, starting to take flight and flutter violently behind you like kites in the sky. The feeling of being so close to land, yet so far up into the sky was so indescribable-gravity accelerated the thrill in your heart as Dowoon let out a long, unceremonious scream, cheering for the destination that wasn’t too far from where you were.
“We’re almost here!” he broke into a small gummy smile beneath the mop of his fluttering curls-they seemed to run across the border of his forehead, like running waves crashing beautifully onto the shore of a beach.
However, contrary to your imagination, the river that surrounded all of you in its big embrace was especially quiet-only letting small dribbles of light from the lighthouse float gently above the surface of the waves as both of you moved past, like bioluminescent lily pads that had descended from the glow of the moon. Mountains foreshadowed the road ahead mysteriously, painted in a darker shade of navy than the star speckled-sky above both of you, and the road to the picnic area was long and windy, snaking out into a canopy of trees relaxedly.
“You’d never get anything like this in the city.” you said in slight awe, hands slowly finding themselves crawling up to Dowoon’s broad shoulders as you dared to hoist yourself up, breaking up from your posture a tad bit, and as you felt one of his curls brush past your wrists, he laughed his slow, deep laugh in response.
“You’re cute. I had a friend that didn’t live in Busan as a kid, and he lived in the more country area-he would probably protest if he heard what you just said…” His deep voice trailed off softly, seeming to follow the snaking nature of the concrete road ahead of you. “-Nevertheless, I’m happy we’re here. It’s nice to ride out here with someone.”
His eyes, which had now stopped displaying the light of the sun to catch the glow of the moon, was still as warm as ever in the cold weather. With undeniable faith tinting the light that ringed his eyes, half opened submissively and bringing out the semi rosy tint in his bags, the carefree smile on his lips and the uplift of his cheeks resembling floating clouds didn’t fail to bring you back in awe again; it was as if all laws of astronomy tailed after his presence, and followed in the footsteps of his unbreakable belief.
“You’re really very beautiful.” the words left your lips through an airy whisper, and you were too busy staring at him again to even notice what you said until Dowoon spoke up again.
“U-Um…Me? R-Really? Thanks, I guess…” his eyes bore a different spark to it as they drooped shyly, like a mimosa recoiling at someone’s touch-and as the truth dawned onto you slowly, mixed feelings of embarrassment and self-blame kicked in a little too fast-you really, really wanted to kick yourself for saying that.
Trying to salvage the situation, you quickly spoke up upon seeing his tilted eyebrows and the embarrassment written on his face. “I-I didn’t mean that in a weird way, I’m sorry, not that I don’t love your looks-or not that I don’t love you any less, i-it’s just-” you stuttered awkwardly, brain stupidly failing you at this crucial moment-but being a nice guy, Dowoon just shook his head briefly.
With a small smile breaking onto his face, not fully suggestive; yet not fully chaste, he responded in awe, big eyes widening with more faith than before.
“No, no, please don’t apologise, because…” Dowoon spoke with the smile of reuniting with someone again, overly excited to articulate his words properly, “B-Because, I-”
“Dowoon! What’s taking you so long, can you drive faster? You’re almost there already, hurry up!” Jaehyung’s voice suddenly broke through the world that only both of you shared, halting the climax of the story. He and Younghyun were on a higher end of a cliff, where the destination was, and you could already see their hands waving vigorously in your direction. Jihyo and Chaewon had arrived too-you could see two figures with long hair sit on a big red mat.
“What was that you were going to say?” you asked, as the scooter started to move again; both of you had been so immersed in conversation that you hadn’t even realised that Dowoon stopped the vehicle to talk.
However, contrary to what you thought he was going to say, Dowoon shook his head almost nonchalantly, losing a bit of the faith in his gaze as he looked down with baggy eyes of dejection.
He squeezed his lips into a textbook version of a smile and talked at a slower pace, this time more scarily composed than before. “I-It’s nothing. I don’t know if I’ll have the courage to tell you again.”
The entire trip to the cliff went downhill in a veil of awkward silence, both of you knowing full well in your hearts why such a thing had happened. Wind rocketed past your ears silently, blowing against your ears and hitting against your hair-as if coaxing you to speak, but right now, you didn’t know if you had the courage to say anything to him when you had made him sad.
In less than a minute, the scooter had surfaced up the flatter parts of the cliff, and you decided that this was the best moment to speak up.
“I’m sorry if I made you sad or anything.” you mumbled awkwardly, stepping out of the scooter and nearly losing your balance-having your feet on the ground after 2 whole hours seemed like a foreign concept to your legs right about now.
Dowoon shook a hand at you almost instantly. “You’ve made me more happy than I could ever imagine.” he said unhesitantly, and this time, smiled at you with a more genuine smile. For a second, you could see the faith of the crescent moon resurface back on the ring of his eyes as he continued, “Just have fun tonight, that’s all I ask for.”
You nodded back, returning his smile; and with a new, strangely fluttering feeling in your heart you followed Dowoon to the picnic mat, where Jihyo and Chaewon were sitting, dressed in casual clothing-you felt slightly out of place, decked out in your sloppy, mud-speckled school uniform as you greeted them shyly, sitting yourself onto the mat. But thankfully, the girls initiated conversations well-definitely way better than you did, and within seconds, you hadn’t even realised that Dowoon had slipped away to somewhere else.
“So, how’s life after finals?” Jihyo asked cheerily, or rather, the way she usually talked; it wasn’t rare to see that consistent, bright smile of hers plastered on her doll like face.
You didn’t exactly know how to answer. “I don’t really know. After school today I have that 4 month break that most have, so what happened after your break?” You started to laugh as you realised how you had redirected the topic back to them, and both of them started doing the same.
“Hmm-hahaha-I’d say that college life is still manageable, I’ve been doing it for about 2 months plus.” Jihyo answered, failing to contain her laughter at one point as she squeezed her eyes together endearingly. “Chaewon is entering a polytechnic, so she has about 2 months more to break, same with Dowoon, Jaehyung and Younghyun want to go to a uni, so they’re going to college too, but I don’t know…like. I really don’t know what I want in life yet…”
Her voice trailed off awkwardly, with the fading smear of her chirpy voice, and you couldn’t help but relate. Sure, you had a subject combination and you had did pretty good in finals, but you didn’t have a certain passion you would shirk everything to chase; not like many of the people in your class, who were already able to aim their arrows towards their target.
“It’s okay. I’m sure you’ll find it soon when the time arrives, I’m looking for what I want too.” you said with empathy, and in response Jihyo nodded politely.
“I suppose.”
All of you talked for a while longer, on less serious topics-occasionally breaking out in laughter when Jihyo came up with one of her silly, yet timely antics, and going soft hours when Chaewon showed all of you pictures of her labrador-it was a he, with a slender, healthy body and adorable marble eyes.
After a while of staring, you had only come to realise that the mahogany, soft brown shade of his fur was the same colour you saw, inked intricately in the depths of Dowoon’s eyes.
Just then, there was a very coincidental, but hesitant tap on your shoulders.
“Can you come with me?” a low voice spoke up amidst the cooing over the dog, and you looked up, despite already recognising who it was.
This time, his gaze looked a little different; you couldn’t help but feel slightly excited as you noticed the enigmatic sparkle that stood out amidst his gentle, brown eyes, taking his outstretched hand and standing up.
“Yoon Dowoon, I’m warning you, if you don’t bring her back safely, we will tail after you with bats and split your head open.” Jihyo suddenly spoke up with a glint in her big, doll eyes, voice cracking menacingly at the last line-and again, both of you laughed at her antics.
“Don’t worry, I won’t.” he laughed awkwardly, voice faltering at the last line. You couldn’t help but notice that Dowoon’s cheeks were starting to heat up, but quickly ignored it when he gestured at you to follow him.
Contrary to what you thought it would be, the walk to the destination wasn’t very long, unlike earlier on. From the angle of the picnic mat, a loudspeaker in the distance was clearly visible. Next to it were two other figures, Younghyun and Jaehyung-with a bass and electric guitar slung around their chests respectively.
Needlessly to say, you were shocked. “They can play those?” you exclaimed, and with a small nod, Dowoon chuckled gleefully, “Look to your left.”
Without a moment of thought, you turned your head.
Cymbals, glinting on the cusp of its dully golden surface like the rings of Saturn, with two smaller drums and a large bass drum positioned at the bottom-it seemed like you were exaggerating, but…
“Dowoon, you can play that? ” you cried out, faltering a little at the last word, but unlike how you had reacted, he just smiled like it wasn’t that great of a feat to play the drums.
“Not just that, I’m going to play you a song.” he responded triumphantly, as he approached the spinning chair behind it and sat down. A smug smile remained on his face unwaveringly as he bent down to pick up his drumsticks, humming a gentle tune between his lips-and you couldn’t help but smile, wondering if that was the very song they were about to play.
“This is all for you by the way,” Younghyun cut in, a malicious smirk playing on the sides of his lips as you turned to him, “-We have a school recital tomorrow, and we’ve practically practiced this song till we could play it with closed eyes-but our naughty youngest absolutely insisted on playing this instead of anything else, just because of his-”
“OKAY, OKAY, I think that’s about enough.” Dowoon shouted obnoxiously, with a slightly annoyed, slightly red look on his face, and everyone started to laugh.
“Take it away then, drummer boy.” you said enthusiastically, remaining rooted to the ground in anticipation.
You definitely weren’t ready for the moment he started to position those drumsticks of his.
As the guitar kicked off the song, while layered by the low consistency of the bass, you smiled unconsciously as you let the melody hum in your voice softly. It was in A major, a nice, steady rhythm; and more so when a string of clashes echoed from the cymbals, not too far away from where you were-before there was another silvery tap, followed up by what sounded like the rustle of leaves.
Then, as the melody descended down a few keys, Jaehyung rasped gently into the mic, like the soft blow of the night breeze surrounding you.
Every day I lived like I was dead But you
Became the reason For me to get up Once more You made me wanna open my eyes
In sync with the bass, your heart thumped against your chest-and you stared at Dowoon, who gave you a small smile, before going into a rapid flurry of beats yet again.
Just your smile alone Makes me breathe Because of you, I’m Better better Better baby Only your love Makes the frozen me Start to run again Higher higher Higher baby
The reason for all this looked back at you knowingly, with the same spark of faith spinning confidently in his eyes; as if he understood what he meant to you, and then, the night sky seemed to tear down from the face of the earth, and enclasp itself in the centre of his eyes.
I used to never wait for tomorrow But you Became the reason For me to take one more step Not too far ahead You held out your hand to me
Just your smile alone Makes me breathe Because of you, I’m Better better Better baby Only your love Makes the frozen me Start to run again Higher higher Higher baby The bass suddenly made no more sound, and soon, the music stopped with your heart.
“You must be confused now.” Dowoon’s low voice suddenly whispered at a distance awfully near where you were standing, and startling you; yet resonating so comfortingly in your ears while he spoke.
As he locked eyes with yours, the light promisingly dancing on the sides of his pupils held the lights of the stars in them-still the ones of a child, maybe even believing more than ever; and in all your awe you began to speak hastily, not knowing what to do.
“I-I don’t know, I’m happy-and these words are what I’ve been meaning to say to you for the longest time, you mean a lot to me, and heck, I don’t even know if I could have survived running without you, there’s no way you could have known-”
“These words are the words I want to say to you too.”
Your eyes widened as he said those words hopefully, taking your wrists-and all the signs of red surfacing across his cheeks, with the smiles that only he could have made you smile with; to the unsure, dull gaze you had seen at your first meeting, to the beautiful, starry sky you could barely fathom in the depth of his big, believing eyes.
“I wanted to drop by your school to visit, but I heard from your friends that you were hurting a lot today, so I didn’t end up going.” he said quietly, now holding up the wrist with the thin, ugly scar zipped across it and kissing it; at that moment, you could barely believe the warmth that was withheld between every fibre in the soft, pillowy surface as Dowoon looked up at you again. “And I don’t want to leave you like that again. Thank you for understanding me with that kind heart of yours, when I could barely have the willpower to train the batch, and bringing me so much happiness.”
He paused for a bit, and as if his voice was a conductor, your breath halted simultaneously-before he opened his mouth again, and eagerly said the words that would change your life forever.
“I want to run with you forever.”
You could barely contain yourself from crying again when the feelings gushed to your head, came raining down from your eyes as tears, and through all your emotions, you nodded vigorously.
“I want to do the same, Dowoon,” you sniffed, barely stabilising yourself as you felt his callused hands land on your shoulders gently, holding you close to his chest, rising and falling in waves-he too, was crying; and you never wanted to leave that place again.
Just your smile alone Makes me breathe Because of you, I’m Better better Better baby Only your love Makes the frozen me Start to run again Higher higher Higher baby
From that day on, both of you ran not only across the running track in your school, but in the race of life, hand in hand-smiles being the breath in each other’s lungs, and love being the reason to keep going.
Only your love could make the me who was stuck run again.
______________________
HECK THIS WAS SO CRINGEY AND CORNY IM SORRY ILL EDIT IT WHEN I HAVE TIME LOL!!! ugh I had sm fun tho lol Dowoon is really so precious and amazing aaaa ;;; also, I feel like I was only able to write this so well because of God, who plays the character of Dowoon and way more than that in my life-being the breath in my lungs and the reason to keep going, so really, all the glory be to Him, I have never wrote with such understanding of a concept like love and He really is so omnipresent and amazing in even everything I write even if I don’t mention Him directly!!!
hehe I really like this story uwu its not the best and its way too long than it should have been but it will hold a special place in my heart!! to the anon that requested this I’m sorry if u expected a short read with a much more light hearted topic to 'cheering you up after a bad day at school’ JHDSJKFHS HAHAHAHA gosh anyway I hope y'all enjoyed this if you even finished it, thanks for your support!! I’m writing this on my birthday so I gotta go sleep now, happy 2019 to everyone!
(looking back and literally the only good thing about this story was the ending what the hecK I did so much unnecessary elaboration LOL)
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analyzingdragon · 7 years
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Flight
Fandom: Danny Phantom
Pairing: Vengeful Babes, (implied) Savant Par
Words: 999
Summary: Valerie has a quiet night patrolling. And then she jinxes herself.
A/N: WOAH first post to my writing blog..... and its lesbians how fitting! I wrote this while i was pretty bored and i think it came out alright! sorry if anyones a little ooc ive never written dp before now!
AO3 link!
Her hair billowed out behind her as she raced through the air, leisurely doing her nightly patrol. The town’s lights glistened below her hoverboard and she glanced down at them. She could almost see the specks of people who were working late, or perhaps out partying. She snorted.
Why anyone would want to party on a Monday night is beyond me. She let the thought drift and resumed her flight at a slower pace. She would leave those people to their fun (and their subsequent hangovers in the morning).
It was a cloudless night and the full moon was bright against the starry sky. A few bats were flapping about and eating their fill of the bugs in the air. Yes, it was a calm, peaceful night.
Her radar beeped urgently and signaled the approach of a high-leveled ghost.
Valerie groaned, knowing fully well she just jinxed herself. She gripped her gun tightly and stared into the murky darkness, as if she could will the being into the visible spectrum. She was strung tight, ready to pounce the moment it decided to attack.
“Boo.”
Light laughter filled the air when Valerie yelped and spun, gun instinctively pointing towards the offending entity. She relaxed her grip almost immediately, though, and playfully scowled at the girl hovering to the right of her hoverboard.
“One of these days, I'm actually going to shoot you when you do that.” The girl did a playful loop in the air, and Valerie felt her scowl smooth away into a genuine smile.
“Oh please. I'm much faster than your gun.” Danielle purred and flicked said gun. Valerie only raised her eyebrows in obvious disbelief.
“We’ll see about that. What brings you out of your hermit life in the Zone?” Dani frowned at her words and crossed her arms. Knowing full well that a rant would most likely follow she shifted to let the floating woman to settle on the board next to her.
“I'm not a hermit anymore! I'm living with Danny now! And it. Is. Torture!” She wailed and collapsed dramatically onto Valerie's chest. Valerie simply grunted and shifted her weight again, the years of ghost hunting building more than enough strength to hold the smaller girl.
“Why.”
“He's so boring! Nothing but work, work, work. I can tell he's not happy either, but he refuses to let his advisors or even Tucker to help! Why did he even accept the title of King anyways? So what if he defeated the last king? The hierarchy is stupid anyways!” Dani ranted to Valerie, and Valerie struggled to remain serious. She was obviously worried about her cousin and tried to hide it with indigence.
“There, there.”
“Don't ‘there, there’ me! I thought I would have to worry about him and Tucker being all gross, not him doing boring work.”
Valerie reached and loosely grasped Danielle's hand. “I'm working too, so I'm technically being boring right now.” Dani blushed a bright green and she smirked.
“Well, you're different. You're fun even when you're working.”
“That so?”
“Yeah.” She nodded as if to finalize her decree. She rose off the board.
Valerie felt herself light up as Danielle suddenly smirked. “Race ya.”
She grinned right back and made a show of revving the board like a motorcycle. “Oh, you're on.”
Danielle mimed the starting position of a track player and began to count down.
“3.” Valerie's visor slid over her face and she stood on the board.
“2.” She tensed.
“1.”
Valerie took off like a rocket, ignoring Dani’s indignant shout. She flew at a breakneck speed, knowing full well slowing down would mean being overtaken.
She laughed. Valerie never said she'd play fair.
---
“Cheater!” Valerie laughed again as fists rained down on her shoulder. They were back on the ground in the park next to a quiet lake, only sounds of the night to disturb them.
Well. And the sounds of Danielle's fury.
“I was supposed to say ‘go’ and then it starts! You knew that, cheater!” Dani said and glared at the huntress. Valerie smiled easily.
“I learn from the best.”
Dani snorted and plopped down. “Danny's a bad influence.”
“You really think I got it from him?”
“... Okay, fine, but I'm his clone so I must have gotten it from him. And if you got it from me, due to the transitive property, you also got it from him so there!”
Valerie stared blankly at her. Danielle grinned cheekily.
“I bet you're regretting convincing me to go to school.”
Valerie settled next to the ghost on the grass and laid down. Danielle joined her from her sitting position, and Valerie smiled softly at her.
“Mmm, no. I get to see you every day until I graduate.” Valerie counted it as a victory when Dani blushed a fluorescent green again.
“Noooooooo…” Danielle buried her face into Valerie's chest. Said girl only threw back her head and laughed.
---- bonus aka Danny is a dick to Tucker's sleeping schedule
“I haven't been neglecting her, have I? Oh god, what if Dani's right? I should be hanging with her while she still wants to! I remember being that age and-” Danny “Phantom” Fenton’s rant came to a screeching halt as a large pillow that came sailing from the general direction of the bed hit him directly in the face.
“Dude. Come. To. Bed. Now.” Tucker's voice was venomous even in its sleep deprived state. Danny gulped and complied.
“Now, we can talk about your family issues in the morning all you want after we both have gotten sleep. If you get up one more time, I swear to all the PDAs I have ever owned I will divorce you.” Tucker slammed his head back down into the pillow, throwing his arm around Danny's waist.
It was quiet for five minutes until- “...Tuck, we're not married yet.”
Anyone walking outside at this time would only hear faint whacks of a pillow and screeching about ‘calling my goddamn lawyer, Danny, I swear-’
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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@wiildhearrted​
Puppy play time?
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dead-silencing · 8 months
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if you're gonna keep animals. Go beyond the sizes that 'google' tells you because you can never go wrong with a very large sized tank and I mean VERY large sized tanks when it comes to having more than one thing in said tank. but please PLEASE do your research on said animals BEFORE you buy them from PROPER research materials okay? like sheeeet.
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dead-silencing · 8 months
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when you're just trying to look something up and your boy's wikia page makes you SHOOK.
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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I regret nothing fam, @changqwi
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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decided that it would be fun if we had someone who was a killer but also an “innocent”. so I’m making a verse for corpse girl from corpse factory on this blog. just for shits and giggles. :)) she does have her own blog @intricatecorpses though if yall wanna check that out lmfao. its still pretty bare.
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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just finished making the interest checker. 
its pretty basic. but if you’d like to check it out its now linked on my pinned post. as well as on this post.
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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Jackie: Talking about how much Dez likes mothman and how dez should be thrown under any of my ‘male’ muses.
My brain: mothman. moth. bug genitalia. tentacle dicks. weird physiology. 
Me: -SWEATING- WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS.
@lachrymosestorm
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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thinking about getting a commission of danny and rin. eeee.
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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Rin grabbing my heart and soul and trapping it in her glass sown skin.
@changqwi
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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the dbd hooked on you dating sim game is released now for like 10$ usd on steam. I am hyped for this to finish installing finally. ahhh. breath life into my horror lungs. 
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dead-silencing · 2 years
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Maybe I’m finally alive enough to kick off my murder himbos. maybe? XD We’ll see.
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