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#and I just KNOW she’d love them
tonystarkstan · 2 years
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a dead language lives inside of me now. half-finished jokes handmade for her to complete, pain written in a way she always read so well. someone else finishes my thought, and I start to say, “HERE WE GO AGAIN” before I remember I’m talking to someone who isn’t her. I started laughing recently when I remembered a story about someone in a dorm groupchat, and the laugh wilted in my chest when I remembered I don’t have anyone to share it with.
taylor swift releases a new album in october and the first thing I wanted to do was text her about it. not because I’m a huge taylor swift fan, but because she is, and I wanted to experience her excitement secondhand, I wanted to crawl inside of her brain; I wanted to love the things she loves. in the same way, i hear about the tragedies, and i wonder if there is anyone with her who is understanding her particular language of grief. i don’t get to be there anymore, but i still know what her pain sounds like. and i still know what her love sounds like. i still know how to speak it back. does anyone else? no one else does for me, not like her.
what do you do when you’ve already loved the best person you’ll ever meet? do you hold your breath, try to wait for someone who is (impossibly) better? do you spend your life measuring everyone you meet to the bar she set? or do you resign yourself to it? do you tell yourself she was your favorite thing to ever happen to you and now it’s gone and it’s going to be like that until you die, and if you’re lucky, you’ll get to try again in a next life? maybe you tell yourself you’re dramatic and catastrophic. maybe you go to sleep so you don’t have to think about it anymore. maybe you lie to yourself and tell yourself this can still be salvaged, just so the ache eases enough to sleep at all.
she once asked me for a writing prompt. I threw the word “entropy” out there and she spun it into art. it’s prettier than this will ever be, but here’s what I’ve got: the universe favors disorder. we are alive because our systems remain ordered, and when that splinters, we become sick. that room that took hours to clean became messy in a snap. and that relationship we spent so long building, that love and language so tenderly developed, died in days.
she wrote that she thinks of entropy as “the preprogrammed desire to escape.” I wonder if that’s what it was that got us in the end. all the love in the world, straining against that desire. I hope the escape is good for her. I hope the chaos treats her well. and I hope it’s better than what it’s been for me.
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trash-can-sam · 1 month
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What happens when your coworker kills your other coworker but both of you are in a relationship (kind of) with the same ethereal woman who had an admiration for said dead coworker.
+bonus Evandrey because it’s funny to me (I’m sorry Eva.)
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#pathologic#pathologic 2#andrey stamatin#yulia lyuricheva#eva yan#evandrey#yulieva#evaandrey#Eva yahn#Andrei Stamatin#see I think that Eva is very okay with Eva being how she is- promiscuous and spreading her love (Maybe a little jealous but more rooted in#self loathing and insecurities)#and she’s like look I’m okay with this whole open relationship (technically we aren’t in a relationship even though I really want to be)#thing BUT why HIM. I have to work with him and he’s by far the worst man I’ve ever worked with (besides maybe his brother because at least#Andrey actually talks but really they’re a package deal anyways) I need to have meetings with him often and it’s horrendous every time#like spread your love it’s noble really.#I wouldn’t expect anything else from you#but maybe give him less he’s annoying as hell#I also think that she’d figure out pretty quickly that Andrey and Peter killed Farkhad#just bcuz like. yk she’s there. she’s seen the already shaky relationship crumble beyond repair. she’s seen them argue in meetings.#she knows the stamatwins are not above murder. especially for art. and she’s clever.#And andrey knows that so he doesn’t try to hide it. she doesn’t have recourse anyways-#the kains (who I think helped cover up the murder) employ her too#and andrey respects her to a degree- he assumes she’ll see reason.#and honesty. Yulia might be upset that Andrey killed one of the only other architects but also she does not miss him that much.#she’s like I don’t agree with this whole murder thing but you are kind of right he had to go he was getting on my nerves#the meetings will be 10x more tolerable now that the twins can’t argue with him about things that aren’t even real#it’s awful but it did drive Eva further into my arms so necessary evils.#my art#sorry for the essay in the tags.
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coconut530 · 29 days
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BLOOD OATHS AND BAD OMENS
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kimaisalloren · 11 months
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やれやれ
Sorry for all the Saiki k poses but it’s like all I’m thinking about rn
Mikoto being his soul mate but like they’re actually just like. Platonic soulmates and forever close and he calls her aiura no suffix and hhhhhhh. Like them being together but Saiki asexual and aiura just loves him and they’re best friends and I’m just like having emotions over them lately. Like he felt close and became friends easily. One of those marry ur best friend but like it’s like idk. Not even romantic but if you kinda can’t see yourself as spending the rest of your life with anyone else.
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flowercrowngods · 7 months
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always so funky to be reminded that your parents might love you but they don’t actually like you very much
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tanjir0se · 18 days
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Things about yesterday’s episode that also made me insane but I was too distracted by Sabito and Baby Giyuu to freak out about :
How endearing is it that when directly asked, Tanjiro (known walking Antidepressant) is uncertain of his ability to cheer someone up. Like little buddy. You looked at Genya the right way for 4 seconds and it fixed his whole shit. You’ll be fine
Him waiting outside Giyuu’s house and just not giving up on him. Giyuu being so unfamiliar with kindness he straight up thought he heard Tanjiro wrong when he said he was coming in
Tanjiro sitting damn near knee-to-knee with him. Giyuu staring at his knees like *internally* personal space personal space personal sp
SHINOBUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Honestly I was never huge on her character and felt kinda like I was forcing myself to like her because she’s a rare female character in the show but I always liked Mitsuri better
UNTIL I SAW THAT EYE TWITCH. LIKE OK MISS GIRL WE ALL NEED A LOBOTOMY SOMETIMES 💖
But fr the potential for some female rage here is off the CHARTS. Sanemi please grab her by the shoulders like ‘ARENT YOU TIRED OF BEING NICE? DONT YOU JUST WANNA GO APESHIT?
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the-eclectic-wonderer · 3 months
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I don’t think anything will come from this, but for your consideration, my latest brainrot:
A sort-of Grease!AU with Rose as Sandy and Blanche as Danny (or, even better, Rizzo).
That’s all. You can go.
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claudiasjustice · 3 months
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I started thinking about Frey making her own nail designs (she has Tanta blood after all so what’s stopping her from spell crafting 😈) and then I started thinking about Cuff imbuing her nail designs with a touch of his own power and it was over from there
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feelslikegold · 1 month
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supposed to fly home today like I didn’t see the most babygirl jake possible last night and just ruin my entire life
#feeling v emotional about who gvf are to me today#I met so many genuinely amazing people last night?????#everyone around us were the sweetest humans ever 🧍🏻‍♀️#particular one older woman who I will literally never forget like I could feel my soul come out of my body to attach itself to hers she was#SO amazing with an amazing story ???? like she was 63 and she’d never in her life been to a concert before#of any kind#and she just finished chemo so her gift to her was going to her very first concert ??? which was greta#she was just…….. so sweet ?????? and so beautiful!!!! I kept checking up on her even though we are ignoring that she was across the floor#truly do not know how drunk val navigated last night without hurting myself somehow 🧍🏻‍♀️#anyways……. this band is so Different#would love to go to their shows and disconnect and just have a fun old time but i’m always hit with how I wouldn’t be here without their#music !!!#sounds dramatic af but 🧍🏻‍♀️#and josh and sam taking the time to go around bstage barricade and grab literally all of our hands#they both made eye contact with everyone they touched like they were truly taking it all in#I didn’t feel like just a paycheck to them 🧍🏻‍♀️#i’m 🫂🫂🫂🫂#and GOD the video of jake and the little girl#like. they care so much ???#ouch#hate them#hate what their shows do to me !!!!#going to be on a fucking plane and crying to frozen light 💀💀💀#truly embarrassing !!!!!!#I am not checking this for typos so have fun :)#jake kiszka#josh kiszka#greta van fleet
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ethereance · 2 months
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Au where post canon Allura gets sent back in time to s1. Or so she thinks at first. But because she has no body in her own reality, her quintessence latches onto the closest alternative the second she can return to the universe. The differences are subtle. But as time progresses they grow more apparent. Her ‘future’ knowledge isn’t quite so handy after all.
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just watched One Day on netflix….not okay 😭😭 made me think of demonrry and angel 😭😭😭
DONT!!!!!!!! SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!!!
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boltgunkiller-archive · 5 months
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i find it damn near impossible to get mad at santana’s behavior in 3x06 and 3x07 because i genuinely do think she had the right to be lashing out at everybody. sue me idk
#idgaf if she was mean to kurt and blaine when they were “trying to help” in IKAG#they were the first performance & santana was put under the spotlight by the guy who fully outed her to the ENTIRE STATE OF OHIO & now she#-was expected to be just happy and jolly about some bullshit lady music week to celebrate women as if that has anything to do with wtf just#-happened to her by finn’s hands & of course she was upset because she was only back in the new directions because finn basically#-blackmailed her into rejoining like hello!!! so of course she was snippy with them… and tbh i don’t even think she was being that mean.#i think she’d have reason to be even MEANER actually. that reaction of hers was completely reasonable. and honestly it must’ve hurt seeing#-two people who are meant to Get what it’s like.. participate in that? especially when the last thing she wants is her sexuality that she’s#-still very insecure with Being broadcasted. to the whole damn club. it’s already about to be shown to all of ohio with names addresses#-details about her whole personal life etc like she really didn’t need that spotlight right then she needed to have space and love and#-support… none of which she got.#also the glee writers tend to make a character do a bad thing and then have another character do an INFINITELY WORSE THING#and then they’re like “oh but. the first character was being so mean. this absolutely deplorable and wayyyy too far reaction is definitely#-justified now because that was just so mean of the first character ugh!” and basically spins what happened into showing the first characte#-as the most evil person alive??? as if that’s even remotely true.??? and yes this is about santana cause they do this w her#and quinn. a LOTTTT. like a LOT. rn i’m talking ab santana though so i won’t cover quinn sorry fabrayers… one day!#like yes santana was being mean sure whatever. but finn didn’t have an excuse IDGAF what the hell anybody says about the body shaming stuff#it was mean. yes that’s true. but i don’t think you understand how different those two things are#they’re both bad but the outing is infinitely more despicable and personal and filled with malice and it’s so much more endangering in a wa#-that can’t even be compared to the dangers of body shaming you know. like they’re completely different and the outing thing is just too#-personal and Wrong like. idk. just get that through ur head they’re both so different and finn went way too far and personal. he could’ve#-just mocked her looks if he really wanted to get back at her. mocked ANYTHING else. but he chose the worst thing you could do to somebody#who is scared and in the closet and hurting#also yes santana’s written to be rude a lot of the time but her degree of rudeness in those episodes was Overplayed and def not in characte#like it didn’t feel much like santana’s brand of meanness it was 100% the writers trying to justify finn more because they continued to#-paint finn as the good guy who chose the high road… when that couldn’t be further from the truth thanks. he didn’t choose the high road he#-completely blackmailed santana and used her to make him look good basically. so you can’t change my mind on that Def being a writer issue#and just them Hating Women. especially santana. thanks.#also this is all coming from somebody who loves finn. so. 🤣#i fuckingggg hate seeing people say santana was mean and had no right to be doing all of that in those eps.. BITCH YES SHE DID#like in other eps sure (<- nuanced topic/take) but this one? No. she was justified IDGAF. should’ve been meaner
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wybienova · 2 years
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i have more gay people sorry
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no1ryomafan · 6 months
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I have said this before but me being self proclaimed number 1 Ryoma fan and that being possibly literal-bc even if this bro had fans before me I might’ve simply done the most for him by talking about him so much + being the first to write fics that are in depth studies on his trauma across canons-I gotta say if there’s one other character I rotate a lot that isn’t him it’s probably Kei. (Shocking it’s not Hayato even if I do think about him too- but it’s usually associated with Ryoma bc gays 🗿)
I’m not even exaggerating when I say Kei would be my favorite and only isn’t because she doesn’t exist in many other canons yet my brain rotates the endless possibilities of how to incorporate her. I’ve already written a fic where she’s in shin vs neo verse which worked surprisingly well but I’ve been thinking how universally she could appear in other things. (Whether it be fitting her into a idea of a possible Go team in New or just a new canon completely) I think what I’ve narrow it down to is that she could be like- in Michirus role? Like she’s the supporting female who isn’t a pilot but helps out the real occasionally which I think would align very well especially with the original manga role she has of being Hayato’s assistant. And even if Hayato isn’t grandpa mode yet he still very much is in Saotomes position at that point. Not sure if she’d Hayato’s biological kid to further parallel Saotome and Michiru given well Hayato already adopts the Go team and his wife is irrelevant LOL.
I have no idea if I’ll ever write this specific idea but I’m still- rotating it cause this is such a easy way to get around “picking between Sho or Kei as the 2nd pilot” since both of them can still exist even if one doesn’t get to pilot, idm my supporting females. (Granted there could always be like- plot line where Sho gets hurt so Kei is temporary pilot but I can’t remember if Getter ever really did this since “once your hurt your ass is basically replaced” lol)
#meg text#getter robo#au rambles#I think I rotate her so much because my friend and I talked about her relationship with Go#like it makes so much sense if among all the universal constants in getter one would be Kei is important to Go#granted the shift from “she’s my love interest” to “she’s my sister” will never not be so fucking drastic 💀#also I get why in SVN she wasn’t there for time and idk where you’d fit her but man Kei deserves a more significant role#hence why I imagine her in Michirus role because even if she also had it ROUGH some iterations knew how to use her#also Kei already has a established relationship w gai mainly thanks to arma so- Sho deserves to speak with her too#they can be besties who rat out on the boys but still have high respect for hayato#granted I know the real reason why this hasn’t happened is because Kei is a minor character and “no proper go manga adaptation??”#at this point I don’t expect a anime but it be nice if Go team got used in a spin off bc we had a good run of OG team#I’d also want them to use arc in spin offs too but I understand their more- finicky characters to use#given their main thing is their actual descendants of existing characters and one of them is our first boyo (ryoma)#if you took out the bloodline stuff it make them feel redundant because you can just use go team for that#also honestly despite how mixed arc anime is for everyone they really don’t need to be in anything after this#other then wishing they get something with nicer animation but that’s what’s SRW is for#(also back to Kei I’m a bit upset she did not get a cameo in arc even if she’d probably look horrendous it was just salt in the wound)#(GAI LITERALLY SAIDS WHEN HE DIES IN THE MANGA HE SEES KEI WHERE WAS SHE WITH ALL THE GETTER GHOSTS?)#actually Michiru wasn’t there too so it was probably just woman erasure /hj
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saturnsorbits · 2 years
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One day I’m going to write an Ochako character piece where she gets sick of standing in Deku’s shadow and breaks off their relationship in order to find herself - only for the media to begin constantly linking her to other Hero’s in the hopes of causing/unearthing drama.
She loses herself, succumbs to the idea that she’ll only ever be as good as the males she’s attached to and sinks…
It’s funny, she thinks, for someone who can control gravity - she sure does feel heavy.
#I want her to make a badly timed pass at Bakugo - The media have already labelled her a home wrecker;#she might as well prove them right at this point.#She’s drunk and sinking and obviously in pain; but Bakugo let’s her down gently…#There’s a rough sympathy in his voice when he says:#‘The fuck you playing at Cheeks? I’m taken. The fuck do you want me for?’#She hiccups; tears already beading her lashes: ‘You’re the number two.’#‘The fucks that got to do with anything? You’re in the top fucking ten.’#‘Doesn’t matter…’ She sighs. ‘Only matters who I’m fucking; doesn’t it.’#‘Who the fuck put that kinda idea in your head? You’re an incredible Hero in your own right; anyone who can’t see that is fucking stupid.’#She dissolved into tears then; blubbering about the media and womanhood and skin tight fucking suits…#By the time she’s done she’s dog tired and Bakugo swings her over his shoulders before taking her home -#- and tucking her into the bed in your spare room.#Of course you wake up when he slinks into bed; a hand scrubbing down his face as he relays the night.#‘It’s bullshit.’ He tells you. ‘She’s one of the strongest people I know.’#‘I know.’ You nod and take his hand. ‘I think she just needs a friend right now…’#She eats breakfast with you in the morning and apologises through mouthfuls of toast. You wave her off; ask if she’d like to get lunch -#you know a place. You say.#(There’s something here about women uplifting women and female bonds; but I’m too dumb to put it into words right now…#I just think she deserves more - as both a character and how she’s often treated within the fandom.#Idk. I love the women of MHA 🤷🏼‍♀️)
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intcrastra · 4 days
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Both Robin and Sunday would be the type to gift their significant other smth they could keep on their person at all times. For possessive reasons, but also bc they totally put a tracker in it-
#✮┆ ( .ooc. );#//I love Rob sharing certain tendencies with Sun to an extent#//Like this#//Both do it mostly bc they wanna make sure they can always keep track of their treasured one#//So if they need help; they know where to go at moment’s notice and save them#//They will NOT lose anybody else. not EVER again#//Tho Rob would actively go out of her way to tell them that it’s ok to have a tracker on HER#//Bc she thinks it’s cute; always being in the know of each other’s locations#//Like sharing yer location with yer s/o nowadays#//Sun might not be so eager for that to be reciprocated tho#//Bc he has his secrets and things to do he wants them to be unawares of#//Both feel much reassured as long as they can keep track of their s/o’s location#//The moment they can’t they will PANIC#//Rob might play it cool and shoot off a few subtle texts to see what’s up; try and gleam the answer of them without saying it#//Sun would just#//SPAM TEXT IF THEY ARE OKAY ANS WHAT THEY ARE DOINGf then play it cool and say he got a sudden bad feeling#//Both would have Very distinct reactions to being found out#//Rob would actually be apologetic and explain herself calmly; that she constantly worrieS#//That its Exactly why she welcomes them having her location too; bc it’s Reassuring#//She doesn’t even really make an effort to HIDE it hide; more just never SAYS it—if they asked; she’d spill the beans p quick#//Sun might actually dig himself a deeper hole & give a fucken sermon on his life than say how anxious & worried being apart makes him#//But can be encouraged to speak his mind if his partner keeps a cool head; otherwise it could go Bad for them both real fast#//Both are willing to negotiate alternatives; tho Sun might have to agree kicking and screaming#//But they are willing nonetheless
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