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legendaryorangeloot · 4 years

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Collarbone

The moon is just cresting the horizon when I reach South City. Its cool light pulls on the roots of my hair, makes my teeth itch. I spent all day today goofing off at work, pacing like a bored zoo animal. These feast days are so rare, and my excitement hangs in the air like charged particles before a lightning strike.

And now it's time.

The moon fills my heart with a ferocious lust, buoying me up as I let my long, loping stride eat up the Gravois pavement. I can hear the music at Greatness already. I go there "straight" a few nights a week, let myself be seen. I'm a regular. I even dated the previous bartender, learned the cameras, the exit routes, the watching spots, the nearby alleys. Greatness is my garden, and I tend it carefully.

I like it because it attracts normal boys. They're sweet in a way you don't have to take seriously, smart in a way that never threatens you. They tend to have carefully-groomed hair, endearing sincerity, and well-marbled flesh.

Not all the produce is sweet, though. When I transform, I'm little—more coyote than wolf, more coydog than coyote. All-black, bristle-brush fur; pricked ears that make me look smart and alert. A dog you'd take home with you if it followed you down the street. I grew to trust the bartender, the first relationship I'd had. Born of necessity or not, I thought it would be forever. He was wild, too, in his own all-human way, and loved my secret. But it was because he had his own. One night, without warning or consent, he leaned over me, whispered in my alert black ear as he sank into my body, "I wanted you the second I saw you like this. You're the sexiest dog I ever fucked."

I like to think that he saw the sorrow in my eyes as I turned my head and clamped his trachea shut with my strong, strong jaws. It was intimate, almost erotic. For minutes he fought, thrashing, sweaty, nude, his erection waning, waxing, finally waning forever once I began to eat his throat, and all his blood left his body and soaked into his bed. His teeth felt like tiny hard candies to my canine senses. When I ripped out his tongue at the root and savored it bite by bite, I imagined I could taste everything he'd ever tasted, somehow stored within the muscle he'd used to gain my trust.

But that time is not this time. That time was just the first, and now the kills are deliciously unadulterated by love or regret.

As I near the bar door, I put on the right personality – wild, but not vicious. Available, but not easy. Challenging, but harmless. I check my reflection in an antique-shop window to make sure all this personality-shifting hasn't affected my shape.

Without careful control, sometimes you'll think "act harmless" and the power inside you makes it mean "look smaller, look younger". I have nothing but careful control. There are a few other people with the power to change into a wolf, a specific wolf that looks rather like their human form, but I have finesse that they can only dream of. I can play this body like one of those expensive synthesizers with all the sliders and knobs, as long as the form is human, canine, or both. And I work at my craft, mostly preferring the wholly-unnatural, anthropomorphic, six-foot-tall "wolfman" shape, complete with the goofy clawed hands and feet. What can I say? They're useful, if hideous, constructions. Second choice: a real wolf, a timber wolf, huge. The kind you see in nature documentaries, every hair in place, unmistakably lupine.

I am so proud of all the carefully-sculpted forms that I feel vaguely ashamed of my natural one. Not the average-build, solidly-muscled human one, with the deeply tanned olive skin and the untameable black curls, but the real one, the one that looks half-coyote, half-Schipperke. It was the thing I was most embarrassed to show the bartender, the boyfriend, even after he'd seen me as a slavering movie-monster nonsense beast a dozen times. He saw my true form and thought me weak, small, fuckable. A dog.

But now his opinion is gone, digested, and irrelevant, because I am alone, and I am hungry.

I won't lie and say I notice you across a crowded room. That when I walk in, all the other people fade away. That it is lust at first sight. No, you escape first notice in an inoffensive way, a practiced way. You're a listener, I can tell. You move your eyebrows involuntarily when you're eavesdropping. Wolf-creature that I am, I can't tolerate eye contact, but I do watch those charming brows from the corner of my eye.

I sit at the bar and chat amiably with a girl I kind-of know, at a volume I know is audible to you. I surreptitiously look at you while you're not looking. You're lovely. You're rakish, scruffy, endearingly asymmetrical around the eyes. Your gestures all speak volumes. You even smoke adorably, like you learned it much too early.

My story for tonight, my bait, cast out into the noise of the bar: recent breakup, broken heart, need distraction. It's a hard one to turn down, I've found. Your brows go up minutely on "distraction". I know you think you know what I mean, and it will make the eventual reveal that much more satisfying.

I contain my eyeteeth before they can visibly lengthen, because that's a rookie mistake, but, oh, how I want them to be longer. I want them that much closer to your skin. I can imagine how it will taste, all sweat and smoke, the fine hairs crumpling under my rough tongue, the restraint I'll have to exert when I use just the sharp, sharp points to tease the first bite.

I let my kind-of friend talk at me about her kids, her day, her husband. But what I'm thinking about is where I'll start on you. Your loose plaid shirt reveals the edge of your clavicle, and the sight of it has my mouth watering in an instant. It's been so long. I'm torn between speeding things up by making the first move, and resisting the temptation to rush through this sensual experience you and I are going to share.

I never could resist temptation.

You're writing in a notepad, so this is an easy introduction: "Whatcha' writing?" I try for "chipper, good-natured interest", but lust makes it come out more "sultry purr". I don't think you mind. You're falling all over yourself to answer, the love of your work and your obvious interest in me giving you a puppylike eagerness that I instantly adore, and preemptively mourn.

I listen, mostly. You're a writer; you write. In conversation, you do the same kind of IQ-gauging I did in my human dating life, throwing out a breadcrumb trail of wordplay that gets progressively more challenging. I do understand, and I laugh at the right times, I let our eyes meet for spare milliseconds so you know I understand. I parry back, I surprise a few laughs out of you. I play off of your self-deprecating humor, testing your boundaries for submission, loving what I find.

But my brain really isn't in peak wordplay condition. I just want you now. I want the moment when I gently bite the skin above your collarbone. I want to hear you gasp and moan, hear that unnameable noise-with-an-edge when you feel my real teeth, hear your hazy excitement bloom into bright fear as you realize what will happen next. I want that first bite, the crunch of that beautiful, delicate bird bone against my incisors, and the next bite, and the next. When we're done, I want the walls to double as a red Rorshach test. I want to make the crime scene techs vomit.

You compliment my loud sudden bark of a laugh, and for once, maybe for the first time ever, I am genuinely flattered. I feel like I probably shouldn't give you the compliment I thought of in return, which is: "That made me like you so much that I want to find out what you taste like." But then I say it anyway, and you blush, and I imagine licking your cheek hard enough to burst some superficial capillaries, imagine tasting everything about you, even your embarrassment.

Even though I've laid out a welcome mat for you between my thighs, you still just talk to me, still treat me like a person. It throws me a bit at first, but I figure we have all night. There are drinks and jokes. We tell stories that quickly get more and more personal. I find out about your parents, your brother, your wonderfully strange upbringing. I tell you some carefully-censored tales of living in rural Texas. I tell you a completely-false story of how I got my completely-true nickname, "The Terror of Bulverde". To make up for the lies, I tell you the real true truth of how much I love my family.

The conversation is weirdly nourishing on its own, and the bottles of Shiner are cold and remind me of home. You talk with your hands more and more as you get drunker, and my accent gets stronger and stronger as I exercise my rarely-used human voice. We laugh at ourselves, how ridiculous it all is, can you believe we've never met before, it feels like I've known you forever.

Next thing I know, we're being shooed out of the bar at closing time, and you're suddenly serious when you ask me if I'm sober. I say "As a goddamn judge," solemnly, but my accent is all the way up to 11, and we grin at each other stupidly. You invite me over, and I had almost forgotten that this was the whole point, that this was the endgame. I'll get to still those talking hands, eat them from fingers to palm, bathe my muzzle in your well-educated brain, see if I gain your powers when I consume your heart. I've already made up my mind not to waste one single bit of your beautiful body. I'm going to den up in your house for days, gorging myself until you're gone.

I don't care that everyone saw us leave together. I am Icarus, my wolf-wings melting in proximity to your purely-human kindness. This kind of sentimentality is what gets creatures like me killed, I remind myself. But then you take my hand, gently, and I feel like I should go confess my crimes and be skinned for a coat. Or, given my absolute size, some kind of shawl. Your gentleness is both warming me and burning me alive. I wonder to myself if this is what hard drugs feel like. Drugs don't really work on werewolves. The drug that you are is working on this werewolf, though.

We stop several times on the walk to your apartment to shove each other into little alleys, indented doorways, and once, accidentally, a shrub, and we make out like it's the last thing we'll ever do, which seems appropriate to the occasion. You kiss like you talk: not a monologue, but a friendly give-and-take, with your hands frequently involved. We crack jokes continuously, and interrupt each other, and play-fight, and the feel of your wiry muscles and their light shield of fat under my play-punches makes my stomach rumble. The moon is full, and fully out, and I know I've let my hair lengthen, and that my eyes are probably less human-looking than I'd like, by now.

On your doorstep, fiddling with the key and lock, you tell me that I don't have to sleep with you, that if I'm too drunk, that if I have reconsidered, you won't be upset. I ignore you and step over the threshold and start undressing before you've even closed the door behind us. For a second, you look as though perhaps you aren't sure if you're awake or asleep.

We race to the bed, shedding clothing, and you practically pounce on me, not predatory, but playful, and we forgot to turn on any lights, and it's so exciting and I'm so hungry I think I might die. Your hands are everywhere on my body, always followed closely by your mouth, and that, and everything I can touch on your body, and every glimpse of you I catch, lit by the wan streetlight, is making me want you more than I thought was possible.

And I am somehow in your lap, and you're a much larger person than I thought you were, or maybe I've gotten smaller, and the next thing I know I'm me, the real me, the little black wolf, just muscle and fur and teeth, and I'm sinking those white, white teeth deep into the soft, beautiful junction of your neck and chest. And I didn't even give myself time to appreciate it, but here we are, and here's that bone I wanted, crunched to pieces, half-eaten already. And your look of shock and betrayal and realization makes your bone and flesh curdle in my jaws, but it's too late to put it back.

We freeze this way. It's a Moment, one that feels like we exist outside of time, yet we don't; the seconds are marked by the rapid pulsing of your blood onto the sheets, onto the floor, your delightful soft-pink skin paling before my eyes.

And you say, plaintively, "I thought you liked me." I am consumed by regret, it's a pyre, I'm being burned at the stake by a single sentence, and the pain makes me desperate for a solution, until I realize I may have one. Just one. My shape shifts without conscious thought to some kind of confused dog-with-hands, but I use them to shove whatever fabric I have near me against the wound at your throat, and press down hard. I bite the inside of my cheek and hot blood wells there instantly, mixing with the remnants of yours in my mouth. You're so, so smart that even near-exsanguination can't keep you from figuring out what I'm doing. You look by turns terrified, hopeful, disgusted.

I bring my lips to yours and try to will whatever particle transmits lycanthropy into my mouth's blood, hoping this is really how the process works. You look ill. You look bloodless. You pass out, and I'm left holding my discarded shirt against your fatal wound, and remembering how to pray: god if you just let him heal just let him live he will figure this out I will make it up to him I will make it up to you I will go and sin no more oh please, oh please, oh please

Epilogue

The bizarre, crushed-looking scar atop your torso always elicits questions you can't answer truthfully when you're naked with other people. The bone never grows back, and your new physiology prevents an implant or a surgical fix. You'll never need to see a doctor again. You might live to be hundreds of years old. No one knows our potential lifespan. No one knows anything about us.

You seem to take it all in stride, telling one woman it's where you were hit with a warhammer, telling another man it's from a skydiving accident. It makes you very mysterious and intriguing, and the gossip about you is always entertaining, if painful, to overhear.

You say you forgive me, and maybe, since you've now experienced numerous full moons yourself, felt what I felt that night, you mean it. But you've never hurt a soul. I selfishly infected you with a kind of insanity, and you infected me with your gentleness, your curse of caring about others. So I skulk around the edges of your life, and I bring you raw red beef and whole chickens and half the rabbits I catch each month. We never speak, or kiss, and I never, ever look you in the eye.

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tsaomengde · 5 years

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Tiny Viewing Guide to Star Trek: The Next Generation

Just found out one of my oldest friends, a huge sci fi guy, has never actually seen TNG, or indeed any Trek. He asked if I wouldn't mind writing a viewing guide. Not all that tiny, but the blurb for each episode is tiny. YMMV.

Encounter at Farpoint - Goofy but iconic, series premiere

The Naked Now - Bad but hilarious and a little important

Code of Honor - terrible racist horseshit

The Last Outpost - first time we meet the Ferengi, they're not impressive

Where No One Has Gone Before - interesting enough

Lonely Among Us - I have no memory of this place

Justice - terrible outfits, Wesley episode

The Battle - Picard episode, not terrible

Hide and Q - Riker-centric Q episode, not the best Q episode, not the worst

Haven - first time we meet Lwaxana, don't remember anything else

The Big Goodbye - first of many holodeck episodes, pretty good

Datalore - important!!!

Angel One - totally forgettable

11001001 - meh

Too Short a Season - weird, generally meh

When the Bough Breaks - Wesley episode, don't remember it much

Home Soil - no clue

Coming of Age - more Wesley (can you tell Gene Roddenberry liked the character?), but not bad

Heart of Glory - first time the Klingons get real character, important

The Arsenal of Freedom - automated weaponry is bad, mmkay

Symbiosis - nope, no idea

Skin of Evil - dark, nasty, generally unpleasant episode, important for character reasons

We'll Always Have Paris - genuinely do not remember this one but wiki says there's time travel and that's always fun

Conspiracy - real mixed feelings about this one, it's tense and interesting TV but not really good Trek and it has huge implications that are never revisited

The Neutral Zone - Romulans are reintroduced, pretty cool

The Child - pretty decent Troi episode

Where Silence Has Lease - interesting space puzzle episode sprinkled with Picard philosophizing

Elementary, Dear Data - first Sherlock!Data holodeck episode, excellent stuff

The Outrageous Okona - weeeaaaak, but kind of funny

Loud As A Whisper - cool deaf character, cringey late-80s implementation

The Schizoid Man - Data episode, good acting, cringey dialogue

Unnatural Selection - Pulaski-centric, and I dislike Pulaski so this is a pass for me

A Matter Of Honor - Riker serves on a Klingon warship, some good stuff

The Measure of A Man - Easily a top 10 Trek episode of all time

The Dauphin - Wesley has a crush, receives terrible romantic advice from entire crew

Contagion - interesting lethal archaeology

The Royale - love this episode, it's terrible and bad science but I love it

Time Squared - weird time-travel stuff, not one of the best

The Icarus Factor - lot of good character stuff, terrible future martial arts

Pen Pals - excellent Data episode, thoughts about the Prime Directive

Q Who - WATCH THIS ONE

Samaritan Snare - bad episode, funny moments

Up The Long Ladder - holy shit the Irish racism

Manhunt - Lwaxana Troi at her best, love it

The Emissary - Amazing Klingon stuff

Peak Performance - good episode, lots of fun character bits

Shades of Gray - TERRIBLE CLIP SHOW AVOID AVOID AVOID

Evolution - Wesley episode, not bad but not great

The Ensigns of Command - Mediocre Data episode

The Survivors - space puzzle episode, OK

Who Watches the Watchers - more prime directive stuff, mildly interesting

The Bonding - interesting stuff about grief

Booby Trap - another space puzzle, high stakes, cool payoff

The Enemy - Pretty good, Romulans

The Price - fun episode

The Vengeance Factor - ehhhhhhhh

The Defector - More Romulan stuff, is good

The Hunted - will 100% make you scream at how terrible security is in the future, not a bad ep though

The High Ground - ugh, just not great

Deja Q - good Q episode

A Matter of Perspective - let's use the holodeck to prove Riker couldn't have committed this crime!

The Offspring - WATCH THIS BUT BRING TISSUES

Sins of the Father - first of many Klingon Politics episodes, I love these with a fiery passion and my wife is bored to tears by them so YMMV

Allegiance - space puzzle, not a great one but not bad

Captain's Holiday - WATCH THIS, IS AMAZING

Tin Man - literally put me to sleep once

Hollow Pursuits - First of many Barclay episodes, my beautiful autistic space boi

The Most Toys - alright, worth one watch

Sarek - SO IMPORTANT WAAAAAAAAAATCH

Menage a Troi - bad episode, worth it for the payoff

Transfigurations - Jason Ironheart called, he knows he came after this episode chronologically but he was better

The Best of Both Worlds, Part 1 - YAAAS

The Best of Both Worlds, Part 2- YAAAAAAAAAAAAAS

Family - So important

Brothers - Very Important

Suddenly Human - meh

Remember Me - very interesting space puzzle, one of the Crusher episodes where she gets to be awesome

Legacy - not the most jaw-dropping ep but important

Reunion - KLINGON POLITICS YEEES

Future Imperfect - interesting enough

Final Mission - Wesley episode, not bad

The Loss - v. good Troi episode

Data's Day - fun, wholesome Data times

The Wounded - SO GOOD AND SO IMPORTANT

Devil's Due - I love this episode even if it's not that important or good

Clues - Awesome space puzzle

First Contact - eh? okay? sure?

Galaxy's Child - fine, whatever

Night Terrors - uuuuugh, no

Identity Crisis - this one scared the fuck out of me as a kid and may be responsible for my deep-seated body-transformation-horror triggers, now it's just kind of weird

The nth Degree - BARCLAY, LOVE HIM AND THIS EP

Qpid - YES SO GOOD

The Drumhead - This is Michael Dorn's favorite episode and it is worthy of the title

Half a Life - Lwaxana is great, the episode not as much

The Host - introduction of the Trill, kind of cringey almost 30 years later

The Mind's Eye - brainwashing stuff, meh

In Theory - Data tries to date, hilarities ensue

Redemption Part 1 - GIVE ME THE KLINGON POLITICS

Redemption Part 2 - MOOOOOOOOOORE

Darmok - One of my top 5 episodes in the series

Ensign Ro - so important, introduces the Bajorans and Ensign Ro

Silicon Avatar - important for Data, not a terribly interesting episode otherwise

Disaster - Troi gets to shine! cool episode

The Game - by far the worst Wesley episode. everyone is seduced into acting like a brainwashed idiot by a terrible space future video game. fuck this episode and everyone who wrote it but especially Brannon Braga.

Unification 1 - WATCH

Unification 2- THESE

A Matter of Time - So good, waaatch

New Ground - I am not a fan of Alexander but he is so important to Worf's growth, so... yeah

Hero Worship - more stuff about grief, eh

Violations - I don't remember this one that much but I do not think I enjoyed it

The Masterpiece Society - read the above description

Conundrum - amazing space puzzle episode. easily one of my favorites in the series

Power Play - meh

Ethics - very important, good Trek

The Outcast - THIS EPISODE COULD HAVE BEEN SO MUCH BETTER IF THE LOVE INTEREST WAS MALE. JONATHAN FRAKES PUSHED FOR A MALE ACTOR. watch it anyway

Cause and Effect - fun space puzzle, a little repetitive but totally solid

The First Duty - one of the best Picard Speeches ever, watch

Cost of Living - fun Lwaxana episode

The Perfect Mate - pretty meh but Famke Janssen is fun as Kamala

Imaginary Friend - so bored

I, Borg - INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT

The Next Phase - interesting episode about the afterlife

The Inner Light - THIS IS MY FAVORITE EPISODE OF THE ENTIRE SERIES AND I CRY EVERY TIME

Time's Arrow 1 - Such good time travel

Time's Arrow 2 - Such great Mark Twain

Realm of Fear - Yay more Barclay!

Man of the People - bad Troi episode

Relics - WAAAAAAAAAATCH

Schisms - space puzzle, kind of lame payoff due to effects limitations but the journey is worth it

True Q - By far the worst fucking Q episode ever written

Rascals - uuuuuuuugh. half the crew is regressed into children. Ferengi are involved. you are missing nothing.

A Fistful of Datas - amazing dumb holodeck episode, watch

The Quality of Life - boring episode, good message

Chain of Command 1 - So dark, so difficult, so totally riveting and important

Chain of Command 2 - See above

Ship in a Bottle - Sequel to Sherlock!Data, amazing

Aquiel - could have been written much better

Face of the Enemy - by far the best Troi episode, Marina Sirtis was incredibly happy when I told her it was one of my favorites

Tapestry - fantastic Q/Picard episode

Birthright 1 - Basically exists to set up DS9 but is pretty good and has important bits

Birthright 2 - See above

Starship Mine - DIE HARD ON THE ENTERPRISE

Lessons - Very important Picard episode

The Chase - amazing space puzzle episode, has one of my favorite one-off Klingon characters

Frame of Mind - is Riker's entire life a delusion he has created to mentally escape his imprisonment in a mental asylum? spoilers: no

Suspicions - Good mystery episode, Crusher gets to do stuff

Rightful Heir - Very important Worf episode, good Klingon stuff

Second Chances - uh, kind of bad, but it gets referenced later in DS9

Timescape - super interesting space puzzle, amazing character bits

Descent 1 - WAAATCH

Descent 2 - as above

Liaisons - okay. not great. not bad.

Interface - OK Geordi episode

Gambit 1 - Amazing stuff

Gambit 2 - More amazing stuff

Phantasms - Psychological horror? in my Data? it's more likely than you think. watch

Dark Page - one of the few Lwaxana episodes I don't love

Attached - great Picard/Crusher episode

Force of Nature - environmentalism! is! good!

Inheritance - important Data episode

Parallels - SUCH A GOOD WORF EPISODE

The Pegasus - very important Riker episode

Homeward - Interesting Worf and Prime Directive episode

Sub Rosa - so cringey and terrible, oh my God

Lower Decks - a fun change of pace from the main cast

Thine Own Self - I don't love it, but it is good character stuff

Masks - weird space puzzle episode, I love it but I wouldn't call it Great

Eye of the Beholder - space mystery, it's not fantastic

Genesis - look. this episode is not good. but it has amazing costumework by Michael Westmore. and has some great Picard/Data stuff. watch it.

Journey's End - super important stuff. sets up a lot of stuff for DS9 and VOY

Firstborn - Good Worf/Alexander episode

Bloodlines - More Ferengi stuff, kind of lame

Emergence - space puzzle, weird but interesting

Preemptive Strike - So so so so important

All Good Things... - it's the series finale. and some of the best Trek ever. obviously you're going to watch.

#star trek #the next generation #star trek the next generation #st:tng #tng #viewing guide #blurbs #ymmv

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mrauthor3ds · 5 years

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This is my SSBU tier list of the fighters’ canon power!

Just a quick note: just because some characters are in a lower tier doesn’t mean they can’t compete with the tier above. Well...except for the Normal Human and Penny-Sized tiers. But Peak-Human and up, they can still find a way to battle with the tier just above themselves.

-= GODLY =- - Dark Samus: The single most dangerous entity in the Metroidverse. Teleportation, intangibility, possession, power absorption, Phazon corruption, illusions, fast regeneration, and everything that the Power Suit can do...It took the death of the planet Phaaze to put her down, and even that required some strange circumstances! - Kirby: Already confirmed to hold infinite power. And regularly dukes it out with cosmic horrors, anyway. - Ganondorf: Holds the godly might of the Triforce of Power, and nigh limitless magic with it. Unless you have a divine weapon/power, you stand no chance of slaying him. - Mewtwo: Can conjure a global mega-storm, and that’s BEFORE Mega Evolution (which it can potentially do on its own). - Rosalina & Luma: Rosie can pilot the whole Comet Observatory swiftly throughout the cosmos, and the Lumas are capable of undoing a powerful black hole. - Palutena: Even if she’s not the strongest god in the Kid Icarus world, she’s still VERY powerful. She’s also the source of many of the Powers that Pit used, including the finishing shot to Hades. - Shulk: Even if his Monado III alone isn’t the True Monado, but rather a third of it (alongside Zanza’s and Meyneth’s Monados, which it combined with to remake the world), it still allows Shulk to be a godslayer. - Bayonetta: Again, a godslayer. And one that can bend time and space.

-= HIGH SUPERHUMAN =- - Mario: As one of the seven Star Children, it makes sense. He’s also incredibly strong, tough, quick, and can adapt to just about anything. - Donkey Kong: Another Star Child, and one that can punch his world’s moon down to the surface! - Link: Not just for his Master Sword, but his high adaptability to different powers in each incarnation. The Champion here even harnesses the powerful magic of his four comrades! - Samus: Even if she alone isn’t planet-busting, her Power Suit still makes her a one-woman army against all sorts of biological and mechanical horrors that overshadow the whole Federation. - Yoshi: Another Star Child. While all Yoshis pretty much have the same capabilities, they’re still generally strong, fast, and tough enough to handle all sorts of things - even getting kicked to the moon and hurling gigantic Eggdozers! - Luigi: Another Star Child. Being similar enough to Mario means his strength is practically on-par with him - moreso, if you consider his great potential. - Ness: By the end of EarthBound, Ness harnesses the power of the Earth itself, allowing him and his friends to withstand even Giygas’s powers. - Peach: Another Star Child. She may not look it, but she’s quite powerful when she must be - likely due to her great magic, which can even overpower and shatter the reality-bending Dream Stone! - Bowser: Another Star Child. And a darn stubborn one at that. Besides his super-strength, his greatest claim to fame is a grand combination of tenacity and durability. Still mortal, but it takes a lot (or just circumstances) to end him. - Zelda: While she doesn’t have Link’s physical prowess, she still wields great divine magic. Only thing keeping her in this tier is that she’s as mortal as Link. - Meta Knight: Clearly not on the same ground as Kirby, but he’s able to keep up by repeatedly defeating the planetary threat, Galacta Knight. - Wario: Another Star Child. His strength, defense, and speed are practically on-par with the other Star Children. - Charizard: Being a high-stage Pokemon, this is a fitting place to put Charizard. Mega Evolution aside, it’s quite fast and can melt stone with its fire breath (which is better than how it performs in the main games’ battle system, but official lore counts in canon power). - Lucas: He holds a PSI that resonates with the Dark Dragon that practically holds the remaining world together - something that even the powerful Magypsies can’t harness. - Sonic: There are limitations to the Super/Hyper Transformations (mainly Ring Energy), but it’s enough to let him duke it out with immense threats time and time again. That or the power of teamwork after Unleashed. Eh, still a high tier. - King Dedede: Again, not on the same level as Kirby, but close enough. The Dedede Clones’ flavor text did say they were cloned from “one of the strongest life-forms on the planet“. And he’s still capable of standing up to cosmic threats. - Lucario: High-stage Pokemon. Also has a versatile skillset, Aura senses, and Mega Evolution. - Greninja: High-stage Pokemon. Besides ninjutsu and high power, it can potentially Battle Bond and turn into Ash-Greninja, which is even faster and stronger than before. - Robin: He’s a step above the divine sword wielders because he holds the power of Grima. And in gameplay, he’s one of the strongest units in terms of max stats and Skill variety, AND confirmed that he can size up other units at a glance. - Ryu: It’s not just the power of Ansatsuken that puts him here, but also the Power of Nothingness (Mu no Ken), which gives him much, MUCH more influence over his ki and his surroundings. It’s also practically confirmed to be stronger than the Satsui no Hado alone. - Corrin: Like Robin, Corrin has greater power than most humans in his world, being half-dragon, holding power over Dragon Veins, and access to a wide variety of Skills. And that’s before accounting Omega Yato, a sword with enough power to destroy the world! - Ridley: Not as dangerous as Dark Samus, but still a massive threat (no pun intended). Swift, strong, and able to heal himself quickly through metabolism alone...not to mention his smarts and HUGE sadism (again, no pun intended)! - Incineroar: High-stage Pokemon. Besides its high durability and strength, it can resonate with its own unique Z-Power.

-= SUPERHUMAN =- - Pikachu: Put here as a mid-stage Pokemon. General Pikachu are fast and have lightning-grade electric power, but are otherwise physically vulnerable. - Daisy: Nothing hints that Daisy has magical power on par with Peach, but she’s still capable enough to keep up with the others in all the (really dangerous) sports they play. - Sheik: This is pretty much Zelda, but keep in mind that she used this persona to hide from Ganondorf’s notice. That means her magical power is purposefully handicapped in this form. - Marth: Having a dragon-slaying sword isn’t enough to make Marth demi-godly, but it is just enough for him to stand up to such foes. Being able to heal is definitely a nice touch. - Lucina: Same as Marth. Wields the same dragon-slaying sword, but she went through comparatively more dangerous situations than Marth did (essentially being close to an apocalypse). - Young Link: Not quite as powerful as an adult Link, but still much stronger than most adult warriors in his world. Not sure just how high the Fierce Deity Mask would take him...but then again, it can only be used when fighting bosses. - Roy: Same deal as Marth and Lucina. Though the Binding Blade is the source of most of his incredible might, his keen mind is nothing to sneeze at. - Chrom: While he didn’t go through Lucina’s harrowing experiences, he still managed to complete his Falchion’s Awakening. - Pit: Yes, Pit can battle with gods, but let’s be honest - most of his strength was lent by Palutena and Viridi, especially in the final battle against Hades. - Dark Pit: Same as Pit. - Ike: I will admit that Ike was capable of standing up to a more literal goddess (since other gods were just really strong dragons)...but he DID have the direct blessing of that goddess’s counterpart, so... - Ivysaur: Mid-stage Pokemon. Being able to cut through trees and induce sleep, paralysis, and poison alone is pretty scary. It’s like a Poison Ivy in the making... - Diddy Kong: Not quite as powerful as DK, but able to keep up with his gadgets. Which he made himself. From LOGS and BARRELS. How does he do it?? - R.O.B.: ...Really not sure where to put this. Really, I’m gauging R.O.B. by his World of Trophies incarnation (the Ancient Minister). Yeah, he has rocket thrusters and eye lasers, but not much indicating him to directly match the High Superhumans. - Toon Link: Same deal as Young Link, though this one has wielded both the Master Sword (which Young Link himself couldn’t) and the Phantom Sword (which holds the power of the Phantom Hourglass). - Mega Man: I probably should put Mega Man in High Superhuman, but I did consider that the Reploids made 100 years later were all made to be stronger than this one (somehow)...Still! With the right weapons, he can handle just about anything! - Mii Fighters: Again, not sure where to put these, since Miis’ power varies based on the game they’re in. Their strongest instance I can think of is Miitopia, but that’s still general RPG adventurers. - PAC-MAN: Might be higher, might be lower...He’s so underused, it’s hard to tell. - Bowser Jr.: Only here because he’s not yet on Bowser’s level, but still capable of giving Mario and friends a hard time. Same with the Koopalings, also being bosses. - Ken: Only thing keeping Ken a tier below Ryu is that he hasn’t harnessed the Power of Nothingness. But being an Ansatsuken practitioner, he’s still far above the average fighter. - Cloud: ...Could be higher, but it REALLY feels like Aerith played the biggest part in the team’s victory against Sephiroth (especially when you consider the mind-boggling Super Nova). Still, he’s far stronger and tougher than even actual SOLDIERs. - Inkling: Certainly not city-busting types, but their bizarre ink powers make them really hard to take out. And the fact that Inklings are brave fighters by nature makes it hard to make them surrender. - Simon: He’s capable of using weapons that are strong against demons and vampires and the like. Doesn’t make HIM godly, but it’s still something. - Richter: Same deal as Simon. (Though he did get brainwashed at one point...) - King K. Rool: I’m not sure how K. Rool compares to Donkey Kong, since he’s been absent before DK was shown in his prime. Still, his crazy gear and trickery does at least let him keep up with the ape.

-= PEAK-HUMAN =- - Fox: He may be a threat in Smash, but in the Star Fox games, he’s mostly just a pilot. Still, it did take a lot of training to be capable of flying fast interstellar spaceships. Not enough to directly compete with supernatural powers himself, but it makes him quite strong. - Captain Falcon: Similar deal with F-Zero racers like Captain Falcon. And before you try to bring up the anime scene, it wasn’t his Falcon Punch that blew up Black Shadow’s base. That was thanks to the Dark Reactor malfunctioning (thanks to the full Boost on Rick Wheeler’s vehicle). Falcon was just keeping Black Shadow from getting away from the Reactor before it exploded. - Jigglypuff: Lower-stage Pokemon. Well, its natural skillset wouldn’t quite compare to Pikachu’s in realistic power, but it’s still much stronger than most normal people. Quite a lot of low-stage Pokemon are. - Ice Climbers: They may be small and cute, but they’re still trained to scale tall icy mountains and battle with hot pants-clad polar bears. - Pichu: Low-stage Pokemon. While it’s a GOD in Smash, it’s very weak in the Pokemon world. It IS one of the “baby Pokemon”, after all. - Falco: Just like with Fox. - Zero Suit Samus: Without her Power Suit, she doesn’t have much besides a Paralyzer. Still, she is more fit than other humans, thanks to her Chozo training (and splicing). - Snake: Being a super-clone makes him very strong by human standards. How much higher he goes from there depends on what weapons he salvages, since he begins all his missions with the bare essentials. - Pokemon Trainer: Yeah, I know. These Trainers are all children, ages 11-15. But they’re still capable of trekking across regions, going through dangerous climates and areas, and can fall quite far without a scratch. Heck, being able to hang onto a fast-flying Pokemon doesn’t sound like something an ordinary kid can do! - Squirtle: Low-stage Pokemon. While its water attacks ARE high-pressure and capable of sending foes flying, they still pale in comparison to its higher stages. - Wolf: Just like with Fox. - Little Mac: Just a boxer, sure. But a very resilient boxer able to easily take down opponents far higher than his own weight class - even when they use their stranger skills (like Great Tiger and Soda Popinski). - Piranha Plant: Yes, these man-eating plants are a threat to most people, but to the lead characters like Mario, these are just common enemies.

-= NORMAL HUMAN =- - Dr. Mario: This Mario comes from a reality where he only battles diseases with vitamin pills. Not much to prove himself on par with the usual Mario, but I could be wrong here. - Mr. Game & Watch: Let’s face it - the usual lead roles of the Game & Watch games are ordinary people. - Villager: Probably one of the most pacifistic characters to ever join Smash. The worst he ever had to deal with in Animal Crossing were tiny scorpions and spiders. - Wii Fit Trainer: Certainly a fit individual, but not one that engages in combat frequently in Wii Fit. Pretty sure she can’t even conjure solar power there... - Duck Hunt: They’re just a normal hunting dog and a normal duck. Yup. - Isabelle: Same deal as Villager, really.

-= PENNY-SIZED =- - Olimar: I made this tier. SPECIFICALLY. For Olimar and the Pikmin. Also applies to Alph, because same size.

#super smash bros ultimate #tier list #canon power

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ask-angeloflight · 7 years

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I’ll just post these old doodles now to fill up the empty space of my brief inactivity for the next couple of days~ In result of the impending doom that is report cards. ;;

Well anyways! I'm just going to start rambling about Kid Icarus weapons after this break, so if you want to read that or you’ve played Kid Icarus: Uprising yourself, which is relevant to the topic, then continue on~!! :D

So, recently my curiosity has been peaking me on what peoples favourite weapons are!! It can just be a weapon or a class in general or a specific one! Since I'm pretty attached to some specific ones myself. Enough that I refuse to fuse them to anything else, even if it actually creates a better result. Which are these babies right here ~ ~ --vvvv

(sorry if the pictures don’t look good, I'm not a good photographer ^u^;; )

I used that Predator Canon for most of my first run of the whole game!! The next 2 I got later on when I was doing my Intensity 9 Run on the game. The Darkness Bow really helped me on the rest of that run~ Coincidently these are also my 3 favourite weapon classes!

Now that I've told my favourites, to anyone still reading this, I’m really interested to know yours and why~!! Tell me stories about them or something, and I might reply! (Maybe, I don’t know. I get really anxious when talking to new people. But I'll try >^<;; )

Guess I’ll stop rambling now, I don’t know how many people will actually read this and respond;; But I guess I’m hopeful... You know, maybe I should try and socialize more since I don’t have anyone to talk Kid Icarus about ;u; My only outlet is this blog T-T.

#kid icarus #kid icarus uprising #phosphora #viridi #ramble #weapons #doodle

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whateverhappenedpodcast · 7 years

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VAs Announced!

It’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for. The moment of truth. Who got in? Who didn’t? Will Ollie finish the episode anytime soon? Will the mentioned sneak peek be out soon?

Well all these and more will be answered! But first, I’d like to say thank you. The turn-out for auditions was huge, and I couldn’t be happier. So, if you didn’t get in, I really mean it when I say come to me any time and request a role, and I will probably have one for you.

For those just now joining us, these VAs are for Whatever Happened to Jonathan Green?, a fictional choose-your-own-adventure mystery podcast taking place at a summer camp.

Now, without waiting any longer, here are the VAs, starting with the mains!

Penny: Penny actually has TWO voice actors, and you’ll see why when the first episode comes out! These two are @theoriginaleverythingtrash and @nerdamongnerds !

Debra: The LOVELY @m4n4-t ! Who also plays Elliot in Death at a Low Price. We’re blessed by her presence and her voice. You have no idea.

Gabriel: Is @doctorcecilgrahamlecter ! Another great audition. I was scared I wouldn’t find anyone for Gabriel, but of course this one came up and I was INSANELY pleased.

Jenny: Is @mattie-martinn ! Some of you may know her from the Rock and Riot animated short, or from Rover Red: Alone in the Apocalypse. We’re VERY happy to have her on board for this project.

Allie: Is @zeesaysrelax ! I absolutely adored this audition, so it’s a pleasure to have them on board as well!

Henry: Is @rainingcheshirecats ! He plays Icarus in Death at a Low Price, and due to the fact that we didn’t have many a audition for Henry, was a godsend.

Rio: Is played by @lone-kocity! Another Death at a Low Price VA, and got the part with a combination of ‘not many auditions for rio’ and ‘has a lovely lovely voice’!

Kelly: Is @finding-my-truth ! Again, really loved this audition- though I loved all the auditions so so much!!!

Ammon: Is played by another VA I use in basically everything I do, because he’s so GOSH DARN WONDERFUL you have NO IDEA. He’s also a theater kid of mine, so I know he does well ALL THE TIME. Anyway! Welcome to the crew, @tavr0ss !

? ? ?, or Liam as I’ve named them: Is played byyyy @luminous-nebula who it apparently won’t let me tag! I was stuck between two parts for them, before ultimately deciding on this one.

Jay: Is played by the also-lovely @johnpeter-remember-thesnowman ! Cam has tried out for basically everything I’ve done, and all their auditions have been a++.

Winnifred: While not on the audition sheet, this part was given to @martin-du-creff who it ALSO won’t let me tag for some reason. This is an example of ‘if I get over my social anxiety I’ll give you a part’. They were lovely in a previous audition for something else, and here we are.

When will work on the podcast start? Immediately. When will the sneak peak be out? As soon as possible. When will the first episode be out? Again, ASAP.

The public chat for EVERYONE wishing to take part in the mystery is https://discord.gg/Z2shRZK .

Voice Actors can message me for the other discord for the creators and the vas and such.

Have a lovely day!

-Ollie

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gengarfan3 · 7 years

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Happy Birthday, Lucina

It was April 20th at the Smash Mansion. While most didn't care for this day, a few did for one reason: it was Lucina's birthday. Lucina in particular was very excited for this day, and she was celebrating it in the only way she would truly enjoy.

...

By slaying everyone around her, even her friends and family. Starting with her own father, Chrom. Because that's normal for Lucina, amirite?

~The boss theme from Sonic CD starts to play~

"L-lucina... WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!" Chrom screamed as he fell to the floor, with a stab wound in his stomach.

"Because... because this is what I always wanted," Lucina stated, a deranged smile on her face. "This is the only reason I wanted to free the future from Grima... to slay everyone myself and take over. And believe me when I say this... the future where Grima rules... was much better for pathetic fools like you and everyone else in this damned place."

"Lucina... I know everything you just said is nothing but a lie... there's no way you aren't being contro-"

Having enough of Chrom's existence, she sliced his head of with the Parallel Falchion, leaving the once holy blade covered in blood.

And thus began her mass murder spree across the whole Smash Mansion.

Sonic. Peach. Mega Man. Robin. Even Master Hand and Crazy Hand. Nearly everyone was wiped out without a clue as to who was behind the string of murders. And it seemed that all hope was lost.

Butt, there was one last ray of hope for the world. One being powerful enough to stop Lucina.

... By the time they grew aware of the situation however, it was too late. Aside from Wario and Waluigi, everyone who had lived at the mansion had already perished. In fact, had the hero intervened any later, even those two would have been slain by the mad Exalt, for she had cornered the two and was ready to deal the final blow. However, they still managed to save the tho brothers by throwing Lucina out of the mansion, giving the duo a chance to escape.

~The boss theme stops as the final boss theme from The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie game starts~

As soon as Lucina got off the ground, she finally saw just who save Wario and Waluigi from certain death. Needless to say, she was shocked from just who it was. His ridiculous shape, lazy features, and overall stupid attire made him seem like nothing more than a lazy coward with no potential.

She feared him... not.

Even though she should have.

After all, there were not many stronger than our hero...

PATRICK STAR.

Lucina ran towards the pink starfish, ready to kill him with one slice, but she did not anticipate the seastar taking absolutely no damage whatsoever, and especially not him grabbing her before jumping up high into the atmosphere. Once the two started to descend back down towards the earth, Lucina looked down and noticed that they were heading towards the ocean that housed the town of Bikini Bottom. Falling quickly into the ocean and onto the Flying Dutchman's ship, Patrick crushed Lucina, yet she managed to survive. Pushing the starfish off of her, Lucina's eyes became a dark red.

"Why the hell is an idiot like you wanting to stop me anyways?!" Lucina demanded to know, getting onto her feet.

"It's obvious, is it not? Someone who has sinned as much as yourself does not deserve the right to live. Come to think of your sins, it seems that you have acquired many more than nearly everyone else in existence. Not even the likes of Plankton or even Grima himself have acquired as many sins in their entire existences than you have within the last six days, five minutes, and twenty-seven-and-a-half-seconds. Interesting... interesting," Patrick remarked.

"Ugh... just SHUT UP AND DIE ALREADY!" Lucina screamed.

"How about both of you get off of my ship?!" the Flying Dutchman roared as he appeared out of nowhere. Patrick however had other plans, for he instead punched the ship, which broke it in half, leaving Lucina and himself to fall as the Dutchman cried over the recent events.

"DAMN IDIOT!" the Exalt yelled before Patrick started throwing tons of watermelons at her. Eventually, she crashed right into the then empty Mermalair, but quickly got up to continue the fight. However, Patrick tackled her right into Mermaid Man's reading room, where the two knocked nearly everything over, until the Mermalair's security alarm activated, which was a bucket splattering gasoline all over the place before a robotic hand dropped a match, causing the whole place to burst into flames. Lucina screamed as she caught on fire and ran out of the Mermalair, forcing Patrick to give chase.

XxXx

~The final boss theme stops as The Tip Top Polka by the Chelmsford Folk Band starts~

It was a busy day at the Krusty Krab. Nearly the entire place was packed with customers as SpongeBob readied everyone's food in the kitchen, Mr. Krabs was counting money in his office, and while Squidward was having an argument with his arch rival, Squilliam Fancyson, at the cash register.

"I'm not going to argue about it any further, Squilliam! All out-of-character characters wear lamp shades on their heads! That's all there is to it!" Squidward argued.

"Sure Squiddy, and maybe you'll tell me about how there's somehow background music playing in the background at all times!" Squilliam retorted before laughing his signature laugh.

~The Tip Top Polka stops as the Master Core theme from Super Smash Bros. 4 starts~

Lucina then broke through the Krusty Krab's front, glass doors, having been thrown in by Patrick, both of the fighters wearing lamp shades that fell on them during their scuffle at the Mermalair. All of the customers started screaming as Patrick came in, resulting in SpongeBob peaking out of the kitchen and Mr. Krabs coming out of his office to see what the racket was all about.

"NO! ME CUSTOMERS ARE LEAVING!" Mr. Krabs said as some of them started running for the exit, while the rest ran around the restaurant in panic. Meanwhile, Patrick grabbed Lucina and threw her into the kitchen, where SpongeBob started fighting against her as well. "PATRICK! WHAT'S THE MEANING OF THIS?!"

However, Patrick had no time to answer, as the infamous angel Cloud from Kid Icarus Uprising 2: Hades's Revenge flew right through the Krusty Krab's roof to join in on the chaos.

"PATRICK! YOU MUST DIE!" Cloud yelled. Unfortunately for him and fortunately for everyone else, Patrick ripped his wings out of his back and even stabbed the angel right through the stomach with one of the wings before he could do any more damage. Leaving that one wing behind, Patrick kept the other one in hand, ready to fight Lucina once again. Speaking of the deranged princess, she broke the kitchen door down and charged for the pink idiot. Patrick waited for Lucina to get close before he swung the wing's sharp, boney end. Alas, the Falchion cut right through the bone, leaving Patrick weaponless.

"Say your prayers, idiot!" Lucina yelled as she swung yet again. This time, Patrick took another approach, for he turned himself around and used his famous "Pat Back" technique, which clamped right onto the Falchion before snapping it into a thousand pieces.

~The Master Core theme stops as Heroes Win by Gregor F. Narholz starts~

"DAMN! NOT THE FALCHION!" Lucina cried out.

"YES!" Patrick rejoiced as he yanked the other wing from Cloud's corpse. Lucina charged for the starfish, but she, just like the angel, was impaled with the sharp bone of the wing.

"WAHOO! WE DID IT, PATRICK!" SpongeBob cheered as he exited the kitchen. "VICTORY SCREECH!"

... And everybody but Squidward and Squilliam did just that. They screeched as loud as they could, happy over Lucina's defeat. Even the Wario Bros., who just showed up, screeched their hearts out.

"... What just happened?" Squilliam wondered before Squidward hit him on the head with a coconut.

...

Meanwhile, in reality, Lucina herself was wondering why this thing exists. And you should too.

...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUCINA! I’M SORRY I MADE THIS DAMNED THING!

#lucina #fire emblem awakening #wario #waluigi #spongebob squarepants #patrick star #squidward #mr krabs #flying duthcman #chrom #super smash bros #trollfic #happy birthday lucina #why does this exist #death #cloud #kid icarus uprising 2 hades's revenge #squilliam fancyson

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