#benny miller x f! reader

[rayslittlekitten]

Can I?

A/N: Okay y'all. It's here, it's done. Y'all voted on this a while back and it was a bit challenging as I made the mistake of starting to write it with Will in mind so I had to make adjustments, but I think I figured it out. Thank you so so much to @musings-of-a-rose for taking a look at this for me. You are a doll!

Rating: E (18+ ONLY)

Word Count: 6,033

Pairing: Benny Miller x BFF! F! Reader

Plot: A night of unexpected events occur when you and your best friend innocently test out sex toys you had drunkenly purchased for shits and giggles.

WARNINGS: This is the first fic I am NOT including warning tags because I don't want to spoil anything. There's nothing typically potentially triggering like dark stuff (i.e. CNC) but still I wanted to keep it a mystery going in. SO PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

Your friends were supposed to watch the fight with you tonight but they had bailed with some excuse or two except for your best friend. You thought that his brother would at least still be joining as they usually do everything together - like you wouldn’t be surprised if you found out they hold each other’s dicks while the other pisses - but it’s just going to be you and him tonight. Instead of going to the bar like originally planned, you both decided to pick up a case of beer and hang out at your place. It’s cheaper and less crowded. 

There’s a rap at your apartment door and you go to open it. As expected, it's your best friend with the supply.

“Hey, Benny! Just in time!”

"Hey, you got a package," Benny says as he hands you the beer. He bends down to pick up the small brown box off the floor by your door. "What did you order?"

"I have no idea what that is," you reply as you make your way over to the kitchen to stick it in the fridge. "I don't remember ordering anything. Where does it say it's from?"

"The return address just says Warehouse, in Ohio," he replies, inspecting the non-descript package and following you further into your apartment after shutting the door behind him.

He hands you the cardboard box before taking his jacket off and making himself at home. You rip open the package and after seeing the contents, you laugh out loud.

"What's so funny?" he asks, walking closer to you.

"This was a drunk purchase. I totally forgot about these!" You reach in to pull out the items and show him your new purchases.

"What are those?" He looks perplexed.

“This one is a vibrator I keep seeing on Instagram, but it's supposed to be like, amazing," you answer.

"How the hell are you supposed to use that?" He takes one of the packages from you and inspects it, looking at the pictures on the box.

"Well, one way you can use it is you insert this side into your pussy and this part is supposed to sit on your clit," you point and explain to him. "It also comes with a detached remote so someone else can control it.

"I don't know if that's a terrible time or a great time."

"The vibration is supposed to be very powerful but quiet," you add. "Supposed to be discreet. They try to sell it by showing women supposedly wearing it in public under their clothes without anyone apparently knowing and their partner has control of it and she's like losing her shit."

"I'm curious now."

"For science!" You declare as you snatch the package from him. You start opening it up and pull the contents out. "Shit, it needs AAA batteries. TV remote!"

You head to the living room and he follows you. You take the batteries out of your TV remote and shove them into the new toy. After turning it on, it buzzes lightly in your hand, moving subtly.

"Let's see how crazy it can get." You start playing with the buttons until it goes up to the highest setting and Ben's eyes get wide as saucers watching it flop around in your palm, practically jumping out of your hand.

"Jesus Christ!" Benny hops back.

"Yeah, now imagine that between your legs."

"I'm not sure I want to. Looks like it would scramble all the sperm inside my balls. Besides, I don't think it was made for my body parts," he points out.

"You just don’t have an imagination," you jab. "Hmm, should we test drive it?" you suggest as you shut it off.

“What do you mean?" he asks curiously.

"See if the hype is real," you answer. "Especially that other one." You point to the other toy that's still in its package.

"That one's supposed to feel like your clit is actually getting sucked on."

"I didn't even know such toys exist," he confesses. 

"There are soooo many sex toys out there, you don't even know. Why don't you go get us some cold ones while I figure these out?" you suggest.

"You really wanna do this?” He checks again.

"Yeah, why not? It's not like we have anything else better to do except watch two grown men beat each other up," you state. “Come on, this isn’t any different than the time we accidentally found Will’s porn stash and you got a boner.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t jerk off.”

“You totally did. Not in front of me, but you were not discreet when you snuck off to the bathroom with one of his magazines to ‘take a shit’,” you look at him knowingly.

“Okay, fine,” he shrugs and adjusts his forward-facing cap. “You have a point.” He heads back into the kitchen to grab some beer.

When he comes back with two opened bottles in hand, he finds you reading the manual and reviewing the other toy.

"So how exactly are we testing these?" he asks, settling down next to you on the couch and taking a gulp of his beer.

"Well, I'm not gonna stick it down my pants if that's what you're thinking. Would that be too weird?” You scrunch your nose while looking over at your best friend who looks just as clueless.

"I don't know. That's why I'm asking. It ain't going down my pants. No amount of alcohol is gonna get that to happen."

"Okay, I didn't think this through. I mean, I guess we can just test it on our arms or something," you shrug cluelessly, thinking of the first thing that comes to mind and then going back to the manual.

"How would that work?" Benny asks as he takes the remote sitting next to him, inspecting it.

As you begin to answer, he starts randomly pressing buttons and you shriek, jumping in your seat. Benny also jumps back, spilling some of his beer as he reacts to your sudden outburst.

"What the hell?!" He looks over to you.

You instantly reach for the vibrator that happened to be sitting between your legs, snug against the front of your pants and toss it at him. Benny tries to dodge it like it's a dead cockroach, but it lands on his lap and he immediately launches himself off the couch. The vibrator continues to bounce around the cushion of the couch until Benny finally shuts it off.

"What the hell was that, man?" Benny looks over at you.

"It was between my legs when you turned it on, you ass!"

“Well, what the hell was it doing there? You said you weren't gonna test it that way."

"I wasn't! It just happened to be there while I was reading on how to operate the other one. Why'd you turn it on?" You shoot back.

"I don't know what the hell I'm doing!" He shouts. "This shit is like rocket science! How do you women even use these things?"

"Men use them too," you correct him. 

“Well, clearly I never have," he admits and returns to his seat, flicking the vibrator towards you to make room for himself.

"You're such a prude. It's not like I was wearing it," you say, grabbing it away from him.

"I'm not a prude! You freaked out so I freaked out." He takes another gulp of his beer.

"Whatever," you mumble, still feeling a bit flustered and embarrassed by what had happened. You turn your attention back to the other toy. 

"Wait, you've never used any sex toys before?" you shift your attention back to him.

"Nope," he shakes his head.

"Not even with a partner?" You raise a brow.

"Well, one time this girl wanted to make things interesting and suggested a dildo, but it wasn't for her," he starts. "She wanted to stick that up my ass and I was not about that. Especially not after what I had for lunch that day."

"Aww, no peggy for Benny?" you exaggerate a pout.

"Hey, you should think twice about who you're poking fun of.” He shows you the remote in his hand and turns it back on, spooking you when the vibrator goes off between you and Benny.

"Okay, you're having too much fun with that." You reach over to grab the remote from him but he moves it away from your reach. 

You lean in further, but his long arm prevents you from getting access to it. At this point, you’re practically climbing on top of him. 

“You’re right. This is fun,” he laughs.

When you get close, he transfers the remote to his other hand so you shift yourself but lose your balance, landing back on the still-on vibrator. You shriek and Benny laughs at you. He turns the setting to the highest as you try to get away from it in your awkward position.

"Benny! You can't just go from 1 to 100 instant—" You finally roll off of it and give yourself a moment. With your eyes closed and teeth digging hard into your lower plump lip, you try to get yourself together.

“Are- are you okay?” Benny asks as his laugh dwindles. “Did you have an orgasm or something?” he jokes.

“No…” you start. “But maybe I almost did - maybe!”

His laugh finally dies, but a smirk remains on his face.

“Seriously?!” His eyes grow wide, turning his body towards you.

“That toy is no joke,” you point to it still wriggling on the couch. “And now I really wanna know what it can do.”

Benny shuts it off and his eyes shuttle between the toy and you.

“Uh… like, now?” He questions.

You stare at him for a few seconds, contemplating. 

“That would be weird, right?” You ask with a squinted eye. “Never mind, forget it—”

“Have at it,” Benny interrupts. “Now I wanna see what this thing can do, too.”

“Really?” You ask with a raised brow, surprised.

“Yeah, like you said, what else is there to do? For science!” He brings up his beer bottle to celebrate it.

“Dork,” you chuckle, snatching the toy.

“Also, maybe I can learn a thing or two from it,” he replies. “Not that I need any help in that department, but I’m always open to learning new things,” he adds.

You roll your eyes.

“Hey, I’m a fighter and a lover. And I’m great at both,” he winks. 

“Are you done stroking your own ego?” You look at him, unimpressed.

“I’m sorry. Yes, you can go on to stroke yourself,” he answers, trying to keep a straight face but ends up cracking a smirk.

“You’re so dumb,” you roll your eyes again and try not to crack your own.

“But I gotta be the one in control.” He holds up the remote in his hand.

“Benny-“

“I may never have the opportunity to ever do this again,” he says. “Besides, isn’t it what makes this fun? Someone else controlling it?”

You stare back at him and think about it.

“Okay, fine, but-“ you point a finger at him.

“I promise I won’t go from zero to 100, okay? Scout’s honor.” Benny brings his three middle fingers up.

“You weren’t a boy scout,” you point out.

“Fuck you. I was one for like a month,” he corrects you. “So are we doing this or what?”

“Turn around,” you tell him.

“What? I can’t watch?”

“Not watch me put this on. Turn around,” you repeat.

He rolls his eyes and turns his whole body around so the back of his head is facing you. You keep an eye on him as you wrangle your jeans and slip the toy inside you until it fits snug. Benny takes a sip of his beer as he waits patiently. He hears you fumbling around and finally you tell him he can turn back around.

He turns to face you and he looks confused.

“What?” You ask him.

“You have it on? Under your jeans?”

“Yes. I wasn’t gonna let it all hang out willy-nilly,” you tell him. “If you don’t believe me, turn it—“

Before you can finish your sentence, Benny flips the switch and you seize up. He can’t hear it, but your reaction confirms you have it in. He watches you as you stay still and quiet for a few moments.

“Can I up the speed?” He asks.

“Is this the lowest setting?” You calmly shoot back.

“Uh, yeah I think so.” He looks down at the remote to see if there’s any indication.

“Okay, go up one notch. One!” You glare at him.

“Okay, here we go.” He turns it up and you twitch.

You start shifting around in your seat until you feel the vibrator is in optimal position.

“How many speeds does this thing have again?” You ask out loud, reaching for the instruction manual and scanning it. “TEN?”

“Well, here’s number three,” Benny says as he ups the speed.

“Ben— ohhhhh…” Your scolding got cut short when the vibrator starts to really hit the right spots. 

The tip of the dildo part tickles your g-spot as the outer part flickers over your clit. You close your eyes and bite your lower lip, trying to concentrate and keep your composure.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit,” you mumble.

“Uh… how are you doing?” He asks, not sure what else to do.

“I’m… “ you freeze up for a quick second and then relax, letting out a heavy breath. “Jeeeesus,” you hiss.

Benny remains quiet as he watches you slightly gyrate against the couch. You close your legs together and cross your knees, trying to recalibrate yourself for the ideal position. He notices your breathing has gotten heavier.

“Higher?” He asks quietly, afraid to interrupt your flow.

“I’m already slipping all around,” you answer without opening your eyes, almost forgetting you aren’t alone.

“That’s not a no…” he points out.

Your teeth digs even deeper into your lower lip as you contemplate whether you want to chase your impending orgasm or not. You hate that at the current setting, it’s only enough to edge you and need a bit more to get you over the top. 

“Okay,” you finally say. “Do it.”

Benny takes it to number four and you yelp instantly.

"Oh my god," you start giggling. "This is fucking crazy!"

Your thighs tightly clamp together and your back arches off the couch. You throw your head back as your jaw drops open, letting out a silent scream. Your hips rock against the vibrator, trying to get to the finish line.

"I'm not gonna lie. This is getting me hard."

You open your eyes and glance over at him to see him palming the front of his jeans and rubbing himself through the denim as he watches you trying not to lose your shit.

“How close are you?" he asks.

You feel your face get really warm all of a sudden. His baby blues pierce your eyes and you're suddenly feeling more vulnerable than you already are, like you just got caught doing something you shouldn't be doing, but at the same time, it’s kinda hot seeing Benny turned on watching you to the point where he’s quasi-touching himself. Noticing your state of shock, he amps up the vibration and you let out an uncontrolled moan.

"Oh, fuck!“

Your hips buck off the couch as your orgasm comes crashing down on you. You continue to moan as you ride the wave and try to catch the next one, grinding down on the couch. You don’t even care how silly you might look to Ben right now. All your focus is what’s going on between your legs. Suddenly the vibrator gets stronger again.

“Ben, stop! It’s too much!” You shriek.

You’re relieved when the torture stops, but it also feels odd as you feel the residual buzzing between your legs.

“So… how was it?” Benny breaks the silence. “Was it all your hopes and dreams?”

You take a moment to yourself to process the experience before answering.

“This shit is… I don’t think I ever want to experience the highest setting on this thing,” you tell him. “This thing is like a torture device. It feels like I pissed myself.”

You turn to look at him as you catch your breath and you’re reminded that Benny’s having his own fun with this, bringing you back down to earth. He scoots a bit closer to you with his hand still over his crotch. This new tension is clearly mutually felt as you both stare at each other, waiting for the other person to say or do something first. Your eyes ping pong between his face and his crotch, which he is still lazily rubbing.

“So uh… what now?” Benny asks, licking his lips. “Round two?” he brings up the remote still in his hand.

“N-no! No, no! Don’t you dare-“ you reach for the remote again, but he pulls it back behind him.

You chase after it, lunging towards him and end up getting right in his face.

“Benny!” You try again, but pause when you catch him staring at you, his face no more than a few inches away from yours. 

It may be the post-orgasm bliss or the awkward position you both found yourselves in, but you’ve never noticed how easy on the eyes your best friend is. He swallows hard as his eyes scan your face.

“Can… can I kiss you?"  he asks suddenly, leaning in and nudging your nose with his, testing the boundaries.

You lick your dry lips and swallow as you glance down at his mouth, seeing it slowly closing the distance. He ghosts his lips over yours, stopping short of actually putting it on yours, waiting for your permission. You answer his question by closing the gap, slotting your mouth over his.

He kisses back, gently at first, matching your energy. When you slip your tongue into his mouth, he cups your face and returns the gesture. You’re both now devouring each other as he turns his body towards you to get into a more comfortable position, adjusting himself to accommodate the bulge in his jeans.

You both continue to make out with more urgency. Benny’s hands start cautiously exploring your body, placing a hand on your waist at first. It wanders down to your hip and he gives it a squeeze. Your own hands start roaming Benny’s body, touching his hard chest first. His warmth is welcoming, making you twist your body and lean into him. Feeling bold, Benny’s hand wanders to your thigh, his fingers brushing the inside, but far from your wet patch. 

“Can I touch you down there?” He mumbles between kisses while moving his mouth to the side of your face and down your neck.

“Wha-“ You let out a loud sigh when you feel his soft wet tongue on the side of your neck, shivering when he grazes a sensitive spot.

“Can I touch you down there?” Ben repeats, pulling back, his lust-filled eyes looking down into yours.

His fingers barely scrapes your inner thigh, but you feel the jolt of his touch travel up to where the vibrator is still sitting.

“Please?” He squeaks out as his fingers travel up higher and his breathing gets heavier, matching yours.

Even though the vibrator isn’t on, it still brushes against your clit every time you shift and it’s only making you want Benny more, to help you get some relief. Even though you’ve already cum, you are hornier than ever right now.

You simply nod before capturing his mouth again. You moan into his mouth when you feel his hand cupping you, rubbing small slow circles with his fingers. Your hips twitch when he drags his middle finger up and down the thick seam of your pants that’s pressing directly down the center of the outer part of the vibrator which is sitting directly on your clit. He’s barely putting any pressure, but you’re hypersensitive right now and it feels like torture. 

Now impatient, you start undoing your pants, trying to quickly get them off. You break the kiss to take a few seconds to focus on ridding your jeans. Benny watches you as he palms himself again, touching himself like he did with you. When you finally get your jeans off, tossing it over the couch, you reach into your underwear to remove the bane of your current existence - the vibrator. Without much effort, the vibrator basically falls out of you. It is drenched in your arousal, a thin sticky string still connects you to it. 

It made an audible noise when it slipped out of you, as did Benny. Before you can discard the very used toy, Benny’s hand is back on you, his fingertips teasing the band of your underwear. He keeps dipping further and discovers how slick you really are.

"Jeeeeesus Christ, you weren't kidding. That shit got you so fucking wet," he comments while teasing your opening, slowly dipping his fingertip in, putting light pressure against it but it took no effort to penetrate you.

An audible squelch can be heard when he enters a second finger. You moan, feeling his thick fingers filling you and stroking you inside. He’s definitely reaching places the vibrator couldn’t. He hums watching your face distort when he pushes in further.

Your hand grips his strong forearm, feeling his veins raised and his muscles flexing underneath your palms as he pumps his long fingers in and out of you. The tip of his tongue darts out and licks the corner by his upper lip as he starts curling his fingers up, reaching for that soft spongy spot at the roof of your vagina. Your legs open up wider for him as his fingertips rub your g-spot over and over again. Your senses are heightened watching him watching you with darkened eyes. His thumb starts rubbing your clit as he massages your g-spot and it doesn’t take long for your orgasm to peak. You rock your hips against his fingers as your muscles continually clench and release over his fingers. 

"Holy sh-shit," you tremble, feeling the aftershocks.

He pulls his fingers out, dragging them over your clit along the way, making your body twitch at the sensitivity. 

“I think I made you cum faster than that toy did,” he jokes.

You crack a half smile but you don’t have the brain power to conjure up a verbal response. After a shared moment, he leans in to give you a quick peck on your lips. As he gets up off the couch, Benny takes his cap off to adjust the position of it, switching it backwards before settling between your legs. 

The front of your thin cotton panties are completely drenched through. He can see your outline as the damp fabric clings to your puffy lips. 

“Can I taste you?” 

His puppy eyes peek up from between your legs. Your brain is mush so you simply nod.

He bunches the top of your underwear in his hand and yanks it up, causing it to brush across your clit. Your hips twitch and as he continues to rub the fabric over you, seeing your reaction to it and drawing out the tease. You moan and gyrate your hips when he puts his mouth between your legs over your underwear.  He laps up your juices, licking and sucking as he continues to tug at your panties taut against your dripping cunt, putting pressure on your sensitive nub.

"Ben…" you pant as you push his cap off and run your fingers through his messy dirty blonde hair.

His scruff brushes the insides of your thigh as he continues to eat you out. You gasp when you feel the tip of his tongue breaching your opening, forcing your underwear aside and exposing your core. He puts more pressure with his tongue, slipping in deeper inside you and tasting you. Your hips start rocking against his face, but his tongue can only go so far. He shifts his attention to the swollen bud a little higher, scrunching your panties aside. He circles your clit with the tip before pressing the flat of his tongue and then his mouth over it, hollowing out his cheeks as he sucks hard. Your thighs clamp around his head and his eyes focus on your face as his tongue continues to play your clit like a fiddle. He grips your hips and holds you down.

“F-fuck…” your breathing becomes irregular as your orgasm builds.

With his mouth still attached to you, he slips his finger inside you to try to find that spot again. You thrust against his face when you feel your third release breaching. Benny intensifies his sucking and fingering, feeling you clench around him. You cry out when the dam breaks and you convulse around him. He doesn’t stop until you still. As you’re coming down from your high, body slouched from being spent, he withdraws his fingers and licks them clean.

“So you wanna try that other toy now to see how it compares to the real thing?” He asks as he stands up and wipes his mouth.

He was right about him not needing any help in the bedroom department. You can barely form words right now. Never in a million years would you think your best friend can eat pussy like an expert. Taking from his brother who he regularly competes with, he always strives to be the best in everything he does, but this is on a whole different level. And now he wants to use another toy on you? You don’t think anything can top what he just did to you.

"W-what?" you ask cluelessly, still recovering the most mind blowing oral sex you have ever received. 

Your eyes follow him as he reaches for the suction toy to show you. He tries to figure out how to turn it on as he kneels down, returning between your legs.

"You gotta help me out here--"

He's suddenly interrupted when you grab his face and smash your lips against his, tasting yourself. He abandons the toy somewhere and moves up to the couch next to you. You reposition yourself to straddle his lap as you continue to make out. As your hands wander down to the buttons of his jeans, he grabs your ass, squeezing them in his large hands. 

When you successfully get his jeans undone, he lifts his hips and helps you pull down his bottoms until he springs free. You look down and reach for his thick cock, warm and soft to the touch. You jerk him as he’s already hard as a rock. Your thumb brushes the underside of his head.

“Fuck,” he hisses.

Now it’s your turn to torture him. You slide off his lap and on to the floor, kneeling between his knees. Once in a comfortable position, you grab his length, licking a trail from the base to the tip, maintaining eye contact the entire time. When you get to the top, you wrap your lips around him, wetting the head a bit before inching down to taste the rest of him. Your tongue swirls around his smooth and salty skin, lubricating him as you bob up and down.

“Shhhhit…” He throws his head back against the couch.

Feeling frisky, you try to deep throat him and he grasps within arms reach whatever he can as he groans. He looks over when a hand grabs something unfamiliar to him. It’s the vibrator and an idea comes to his mind.

“Wait,” he reluctantly stops you.

You pause and see him holding up the vibrator.

“Put this on while you suck me. I think it’ll be fun.”

You look at the vibrator for a moment and then back at him.

“I promise I won’t put it so high,” he reassures you.

“Fine,” you agree and you take it from him and slip it inside you, orienting it the right way. “You try anything and I’ll bite your dick off,” you warn, drawing a small chuckle out of Ben.

You get back into the position you were in before and put your mouth back on him. As you go back to sucking him, you yelp when Benny turns the vibrator on at a low speed. The noise you made sent a delightful vibration down his cock, making it twitch. He turns it up a notch and your hips move against the vibrator. You start moving up and down on him a little faster, stroking the base where your mouth can’t reach. You deepthroat him again until you gag, but you keep on going, sending your spit dripping down his cock and lubing him up.

“You look so fucking hot,” Benny pants.

His breathing is getting more labored. His hips jerk up and he places a hand on the back of your head. He’s not putting any pressure, but he fists your hair. He doesn’t pull on it, just moves with you as you fuck him with your mouth. You start quickening your pace feeling the vibrator getting stronger, trying to match it. Feeling the beginning of an orgasm forming, you rock your hips and suck him harder.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” he warns you.

Not changing your rhythm, you watch him come undone as he pops in your mouth. He thrust into your face as his moans echo in the small space and grasps the remote in his hand, accidentally jumping it up another level, but it’s what you needed to push you over the edge. You grind against the toy as you moan with him still deep inside your mouth. He spills out of the corner of your mouth as his hips slow down.

When he stills, you suck him clean and swallow the load that remained in your mouth. You reach down to pull the vibrator off and toss it onto his lap. Benny jumps in his seat and shuts it off. You wipe the corner of your mouth and chin with the back of your hand as you get up off your knees. He looks back at you with tired eyes as he tries to catch his breath, cock twitching. You squeal when he grabs your wrist and pulls you into his lap, careful with his half hard cock. You straddle his lap and he kisses you, his tongue thrusting into your mouth, tasting a bit of himself. The two of you lazily make out for a bit until Benny pulls back. You lick your lips and smile, looking down at him.

“We should start making this a regular thing, ya know. The toy testing,” Benny suggests, breaking the awkward silence and lightening the mood.

“Well, I do have a dildo I haven’t tried yet,” you half-joke.

He looks back at you with narrow eyes.

“You’re not putting that in my ass,” he states.

“Not what I was thinking,” you chuckle as you shake your head. “I’ve always wanted to know what it felt like to be double penetrated,” you explain.

Benny stares at you with a blank expression, but you see his semi twitch in your peripheral. 

“Gi-give me maybe fifteen minutes—“ he finally says, pointing to his softening cock.

“Whoa! Hold it there, cowboy,” you stop him. “Why don’t we just think on that? Besides, I don’t have any condoms or lube for that to happen.”

“Yeah, okay. Sure,” he shrugs. “I-I had a good time, if that’s what you were wonder—“

You silence him with a tender kiss before grabbing the vibrator to remove the batteries and toss them at him.

“I’m gonna clean up. Why don’t you put the fight on? I think It’s starting soon,” you tell him as you dismount him and grab your jeans off the floor while Benny pulls his bottoms back up.

“Look what the guys missed out on. Coulda had an orgy,” you joke.

“If everyone showed up, we’d be at a bar,” he points out, then swishes some beer inside his mouth.

“Fair. Okay, a Miller sandwich then,” you switch it up.

Benny chokes on his beer.

“Kidding!” You chuckle awkwardly. “Kinda. Sorry, you probably don’t wanna think about you and your brother fucking the same person at the same time,” you snort before finally heading to the bathroom.

When you get back, you find Benny putting his phone away and relaxing on the couch like he was before any of the sexy stuff had happened, with the TV on. The awkwardness returns. He hands you your beer as you sit down next to him, settling in. You both quietly watch the fight as it starts, but you steal glances at each other every now and then. At one point, you do a double take.

“Dude, are you smelling your fingers?” You look at him incredulously.

“What? I washed them, but I can still smell you.”

You grimace at him.

“Don’t look at me like that. You smell good,” he shrugs. “It’s actually getting me hard again.”

You watch him adjust himself. The both of you stare each other down, trying to read each other until a knock on your door breaks the trance.

“Who the hell is that?” You ask, but Benny shrugs.

You get up to open the door and find the other Miller brother on the other side.

“Hey, sorry I’m late! I had trouble finding parking. Did the fight start already?”

You look back at him confused.

“Uh… are you gonna let me in?” Will asks. “I brought goodies.” He shows the case of beer and grocery store bag in his hand with a party sized bag of chips peeking out.

“Sorry, I just thought you weren’t coming,” you tell him while letting him in.

“I texted Benny telling him plans changed last minute. Did he not get it?”

“Uh, I-I don’t know. He didn’t tell me anything.” You lead him into the living room where Benny almost looks surprised.

“Did you not tell her I’m coming?” Will asks his brother.

“Oh, sorry, forgot. I was uh, a little preoccupied,” he apologizes.

Will looks at both you and Benny suspiciously. 

“It smells… interesting in here,” he comments, his eyebrows furrow with curiosity.

“Oh my gosh, I’m sorry Will. Let me take that from you.” You quickly change the subject, taking the bag and beer out of his hands.

“Wait-” Will starts.

“Get comfy. I’ll bring you back a cold beer,” you tell him before whisking away.

You stick the beer in the fridge and when you remove the party sized tortillas to pour some into a bowl, you notice some unexpected items in the bag. You take them out for a closer inspection and your eyes widen at the bottle of lube and a box of condoms. Maybe he bought these before his initial plans got changed.

You shrug, throw them back into the bag and return to the living room with a bowl of chips, cold beer and the grocery bag of personal items. When you walk into the living room, the brothers turn their attention to you, eyeing you like they’re expecting something other than the beer and chips. You look back at them suspiciously as they’re both very laxed and spread out on the couch on each end, leaving a space for you in between. As you walk over and settle in next to them, their gaze follows you.

“Here Will, I think these are yours,” you hand him a beer and his bag of items.

He takes them from you as he smirks.

“Thanks. So,” Will turns his body towards you. “Benny tells me you’re curious about some DP action.”

You almost drop the bowl of chips in your hands. Will is usually very reserved and diplomatic so you’re a bit shocked at how straight forward he is right now. You glare at your best friend who shrugs helplessly.

“I had to tell him what he missed out on.”

You glower your eyes at Benny, but then put two and two together, your focus now bouncing between the two brothers and realize that no one is probably going to watch this fight tonight.

#benny miller #triple frontier #benny miller fanfiction #benny miller x female reader #benny miller x f! reader #benny miller x reader #benny miller x you #triple frontier fanfiction #bff to lovers

[pimosworld]

Down the rabbit hole

Kinktober prompt-Group sex/Orgy/Costumes

Pairing-Triple Frontier boys x f!reader

CW18+,MDNI,NSFW,EstablishedPolyamorous Relationship,Fluff,Teasing,Smut,Coercion,BribeCostumes, Hints at Roleplay, Fingering,Oral f receiving,Oral m receiving, mentions of MM dynamics, unprotected p i v, anal, cream pie,anal cream pie(don’t look at me)

WK-4.8k

A/N- In the story of us universe but can be read as a stand-alone. I definitely could’ve added more smut but I’m not done with this group just yet.

Not beta read

[Main Masterlist] [Series Masterlist]

“We have to do a group costume please….please.”

“Cariño, whining isn’t going to change my mind.”

  You huff out in frustration as Frankie tries to conceal his laughter. You and Santi had been going at it for a while as you tried and failed to convince him of what you’d already got the other three to agree to after some unfair persuasion tactics. 

  “Sweetheart he’s just mad you want him to be the cat.” Will chimes in from the loveseat as you all sit in the living room.He says it with such disdain that you know he’s not helping your case in any way.  Alice in Wonderland, is long paused on the tv because Santi decided half way through he was not going to be the Cheshire Cat. 

  “How did you all even agree to this?” Santiago still looked gorgeous despite the permanent scowl that worked its way onto his face throughout the conversation. 

  Benny sits up from the floor stretching his long arms over his head. “Well besides for the fact that the rabbit is the coolest character, I got one the best massages of my entire life after my fight last week.” 

  “Weak.” Santi scoffs as he places your feet in his lap. His actions are the complete opposite of his tone. 

  “You’re just jealous.” You’re flattered at Ben's enthusiasm but you know it’ll take more than a massage to convince Santiago to wear a costume. You gave him frequent massages that always led to something else and of course he knows that…hence the smirk etched on his face as he silently rubs your feet. 

  “What about you iron head? How the hell did she convince you to be a caterpillar?” Everyone chuckles at the hilarity of it all because how? This stoic and mostly reserved ex military man was going to dress up as a caterpillar for you. 

  “He’s actually the best character, way better than a rabbit.” He ducks as the pillow Ben throws from the floor narrowly misses his head. “I may have got a lap dance.” The rest audibly groan. “I also get to smoke.” 

  “Okay rub it in some more.”

  “I’m not the one who caved for a massage.” 

  The brothers continue to bicker as you shift in Frankie’s arms to look at Santi. He’s got the look on his face, the annoying toothy smile… the reason you wanted him to be the cat in the first place. That look that says it's gonna take more than that. It’s your own fault really…you were showing off some clothes you bought the other day when he told you to strip. You thought he was joking at first but the way he looked at you, you couldn’t help but do whatever he asked. 

  Your impromptu strip tease turned into another impromptu lap dance. Which of course always turns into something more because this is Santiago Garcia.

  “Sooo hermano that just leaves you. I’m sure all she had to do was look at you and you caved.” The men laugh but you know as soon as Frankie shifts behind you he’s thinking about the other night. 

  Frankie leans in pushing you closer to Santi “For your information I got to put it in her…” You elbow his stomach before he can finish his sentence. It’s too late as you watch the grin on Santi’s face grow even wider somehow. 

  “I heard that Fish.” Ben’s sitting up again looking at you with a mixture of shock and awe. 

  “Sweetheart…I mean this in the nicest way possible but how?” Santi and Frankie are cackling at Will's response as you lean back into Frankie covering your face with your hands. Your body is on fire from the attention placed on you at this moment. 

  “With much preparation.” He whispers into your ear as he squeezes your side. You can’t help but think about how he took his time and worked you open. Whispering praise into your ear as he did, of course in your lust filled haze you hadn’t realized how he knew exactly what to say and do. Like he had been given a playbook on all the things that made you tick. How you would keen under the praise and melt into his touch.

  He would only know this because Santiago had already done it and told him step by step instructions as if it were a mission and for Frankie it was a successful one. He would don any ridiculous costume for the rest of his life if it meant he could hear you make those sounds again. 

  “I’d like to add that the Mad Hatter is the number one character…and I get to wear my standard oil hat underneath.”

  “Oh my god babe you gave him everything.” Ben’s dramatics have everyone buckled over in laughter. You try to regain your composure as you wipe the tears from your eyes. 

  Santi leans toward the coffee table to grab the remote, you can just see the wheels turning in his head as he thinks it over. 

  “As wonderful as all that sounds…I’m still not convinced.” He presses play on the movie as you sigh and drop your head back onto Frankie’s lap, he rubs your arm sympathetically as you stare up at the ceiling wondering how his mother ever put up with him. He lived and breathed to be difficult it seemed. You think he may even secretly get off on it. 

  “At least you tried hermosa.” Frankie leans down planting a kiss on your forehead, no doubt pleased with the outcome either way. Everyone got what they wanted except for you. 

  The boys are suddenly so enthralled with Alice in Wonderland while your mind wanders. With Santi things were never simple, you had to make it exciting or he would lose interest in whatever it was you were trying to accomplish. He may not even realize he does it but you think it’s his way of coping with not being in the military anymore. You know what makes him tick, anything that requires a challenge or a puzzle to solve. 

  Alice: Why, why you’re a cat!

Cheshire Cat: A Cheshire Cat. All mimsy were the borogoves… 

Alice: Oh, wait! Don’t go, please!

Cheshire Cat: Very well. Third chorus…

Alice: Oh no no no… thank you, but- but I just wanted to ask you which way I ought to go.

Cheshire Cat: Well, that depends on where you want to get to.

Alice: Oh, it really doesn’t matter, as long as I g…

Cheshire Cat: Then it really doesn’t matter which way you go! Ah-hmm… and the momeraths outgrabe… Oh, by the way, if you’d really like to know, he went that way.

Alice: Who did?

Cheshire Cat: The white rabbit.

Alice: He did?

Cheshire Cat: He did what?

Alice: Went that way?

Cheshire Cat: Who did?

Alice: The white rabbit!

Cheshire Cat: What rabbit?

Alice: But didn’t you just say… I mean… oh dear!

Santiago was indeed just as frustrating as the aforementioned character that you were unsuccessfully trying to make him dress up as. You’ve spent the last several months in happily uncharted territory since you finally put a title to what it was you all were. The boys had no issues sharing you, it seemed they were much happier doing that than seeing you unhappy with any guy you’ve ever tried being around. 

You were all so close, there was never any animosity or jealousy…maybe some light hearted teasing when someone was feeling left out but you always managed to keep them all satisfied. 

It’s a mad idea…but we’re all mad here. 

You sit up abruptly,slightly startling then with your enthusiasm as you grab the remote from Santi’s lap pausing the movie again. 

“I know you’re going to wear that costume.” He turns to look at you as if you’ve grown two heads. 

“Oh is that so?”

“Yes that’s so.”

“Are you going to forcibly put it on me?” You shake your head as you bite your bottom lip.

“Remember that thing you said you wanted to try?”

“Cariño you’re going to need to be more specific.” You know it’s silent as the intrigue lingers in the air. 

“You said when I was ready to just tell you…so I guess I’m saying I’m ready.” In all honesty you’ve been waiting for the right time to bring it up but you’ve been so nervous. This seems as good a time as any. 

“I see what you’re doing here Alice but I don’t remember, you’re going to have to tell me.”

“Well we have two weeks until the party so if you figure it out let me know.” You press play on the movie again as you get comfortable. Now you can enjoy the rest of the movie while Santiago tries to decipher your riddle. 

****

It’s really not fair

How you have all these men somehow wrapped around your finger. You try to ignore the looks you get when you’re all out together and they can’t keep their hands off you. You can see the wheels turning when someone tries to make out which one of them is yours. You’ve always been affectionate with one another but since putting a name to this it’s like the band aid of shame has been ripped off. 

You’re buzzing with excitement as you sit nestled between Ben and Santiago in the back of Frankie’s Jeep. Frankie’s new boss insisted you all come to his annual Halloween party after meeting the guys and hitting it off with them. Meeting new people and attending such a large party in a ridiculous costume no less took some convincing but the past few days they’ve all been very agreeable. 

Santi promised he'd wear the costume even though he couldn’t figure out the bribe. He said he would ‘since it was important to you’. That should’ve been your first indication that something was off. 

Will is the stoic picture of perfection in the front seat next to Frankie as he twirls the unlit cigar in his hands. He wasn’t a man of many words and he jumped at the chance to be the aloof caterpillar. 

“You look beautiful Honey.” He’s not even looking at you as he stares out the window watching the street lights. You’ll never get used to the flurry of his attention. The affection seemed to ooze out of his pores like he’s been waiting years to tell you how he felt about you. 

You glance over at Santiago as his furry pink and purple sweater brushes your bare legs. You can tell he’s uncomfortable but he’s doing his best as he fidgets with the collar. His salt and pepper curls peak out adorably along the headband of the matching cat ears. 

“I can feel you staring cariño.” You quickly avert your gaze to Ben who is doing some staring of his own. Since you came out of the room adorned in your flouncy powder blue dress with knee high white stockings he can’t seem to keep his eyes off you. 

“I like this.” Ben grazes his finger just under the hem of your dress, lifting it slightly to reveal your thigh. You shift in the seat rubbing your legs together desperate for some relief. The last two weeks have been uncharacteristically lacking in the sex department which is nearly impossible when you’re sleeping with four people. His barely there touch has goosebumps rising along your skin as he threatens to touch you almost where you want him too. 

“Ben.” Frankie warns from the driver's seat as he  approaches a red light,he notices your desperation in the rear view mirror as you hang your head back in frustration. 

“Just worry about the road, old man.” Ben flicks the back of his comically large hat placed atop his standard oil cap. 

“I’ll show you old man.” He grits out through his teeth as he returns his attention to the now green light. 

The tension in the air is thick, it has been since you left the house. You all decided to get ready together and seeing as though you moved into the Miller-Morales household a few months ago that only left Santi to bring his costume and an overnight bag. You had the feeling that conversations were being had without you even though not many words were spoken. It was reminiscent of the night before a mission. All of you lost deep in thought while meticulously going over the plans ahead. 

The four of them had a way of communicating despite all your years spent together that you just couldn’t seem to tap into. You couldn’t shake the nagging feeling like you had been left out of this one. 

You pull down an unfamiliar street lined with massive homes, certainly less modest than the one you currently resided in. You assume most of the cars you pass are for the party and your excitement bubbles over into nervousness as you realize how many people may be in this house. The men all seem completely fine…almost unaware. 

Frankie parks and exits along with Will and Benny without so much as a word being said. You turn to slide out Santiago’s side but he hasn’t moved. You think he’s having second thoughts about going in with this ridiculous costume. 

“Listen if you don’t want to wear the ears -.” He cuts you off with his fingers placed gently on your lips. He smiles wide as if channeling his character for the night as he trails them down along your jaw. His other hand is wrapped around your shoulder teasing the top of your sweetheart neckline. 

You’re already one edge with this being the most physical contact you’ve had in weeks. He leans in placing feather light kisses along your neck as his hand makes its way further down. He traces the path Ben once did as he lifts your skirt higher, his firm grip on the inside of your thigh when he bites down gently on your pulse point. 

You don’t miss the way he chuckles in your ear as you shudder a breath when he drags his fingers along the seam of your panties nearly soaked from just the anticipation. 

“I figured it out a couple days ago.” He rasps into your ear as he continues teasing. You’re trying to focus on his words but you think you could come like this from his barely there touch. “You told us we needed to learn how to share.” 

In reality this is your fault, it was your suggestion after all when date nights kept overlapping. They never made you feel bad or acted jealous of one another, but you couldn’t help but think how unfair it was to split your time so often. 

“We could all go on a group date?” 

“We already have group dates, sweetheart.” 

“Yes… but I mean it doesn’t have to end with the date.”

That was months ago and you thought he had all but forgotten or maybe he suggested it and no one else was down for it. Either way you dropped it until you realized you’ve been tricked. Santiago knew he had to raise the steaks in order to agree to this and you fell right for it. 

“You have a few hours to decide what you want to do. Just say the word and we’ll leave.” You’re speechless as he withdraws his hand and it’s as if a bucket of cold water was dumped on your head. The humid air as he opens the door is a stark contrast to your chilled exterior. 

“Alice?” He’s standing next to the door ajar with his hand out to help you down, you quickly smooth down your skirt as you grip his hand and hop down. 

‘Every adventure requires a first step.’ Cheshire cat

****

It’s not that you aren’t having fun…it’s just you can’t stop thinking about what’s to come-no pun intended. After introductions everyone instinctually split up. Frankie roped into schmoozing with his boss while Ben found a partner to play beer pong, some jock dressed as Ken seemed fitting for the younger miller.  

  Santiago had made eyes at you when you saw him cornered by Barbie, there wasn’t a jealous bone in your body as you watched the poor girl talking his ear off as he stalked you like his prey. He teased you enough for you to let him flounder his way out of the conversation. If there was anything he hated more in this world it was pretending to be interested in a topic he could care less about.

  You were plenty buzzed as you wandered aimlessly through this extravagant house, the furniture and fixtures much too gaudy for your preference .Gold plated frames lined the walls as you climbed the spiral staircase to explore the upstairs. You drag your fingers along the banister as you stare up at the three tier chandelier above the entryway.Apparently running a private helicopter business paid very well…unfortunately money didn’t buy good taste.

  Your eyes are drawn to the red carpet lining the hallway as you peak into the first room on the left. A large Victorian bed with a gold frame is in the middle of the room. Next to it is a floor to ceiling mirror with a slightly beveled curve, the room in its reflection is a little distorted as you lean in further gripping the door handle to keep yourself steady. 

  Either you’ve had too much to drink or the floor is caving in. Strong hands grip your waist just as you’re prepared to meet face to face with the awful carpet. The wind is nearly knocked out if you as your back is met with a hard surface and you feel like your head is in a tailspin as you’re whipped around to meet your savior. 

  You’re met with the soft chocolate brown eyes of Frankie as he walks you backwards further into the room. The smirk on his face as he raises his eyebrows at you because surely he caught you snooping about his boss’s house while you were supposed to be enjoying the party. 

  “Find what you were looking for Alice?” His eyes roamed up and down your body as he stopped you just before the foot of the bed. 

  You realize you haven’t spoken in awhile as you try to answer and manage a squeak. You clear your throat slightly embarrassed after being caught and scramble for any words to come to mind. It doesn’t help when he’s looking at you that way or when he presses against you with his arm caging you in. You can feel his arousal through the thin fabric of your dress as he cups your ass pulling you impossibly closer to him. 

  He leans in and you close your eyes waiting for a kiss that never comes as he drops down to his knees. His fingers dip into the waistband of your panties as he slides them down your thighs. A soft whimper of his name leaves your lips and the thought of someone walking in is completely drowned out in your horny brain when all you can think about is his deft tongue working you open on no doubt his boss’s bed. 

  He taps your leg silently instructing you to step out of them as he balls it up in his fist and places it in his pocket. His breath is hot on your stomach through the fabric as you place your hands on his shoulders for purchase. You’re trying to be patient but you’re pulled taught after the teasing from Santiago in the car. 

  An inaudible whine leaves your mouth as he stands again and places a soft kiss to your forehead. “Shh it’s gonna be ok.” It most certainly won’t be. 

  “Frankie, where are you going?” The look on his face says isn’t it obvious as he grabs your hand and makes his way towards the door without an answer.”

  “Frankie…where’s your hat?” He points to the standard oil cap as if that’s the one you were asking about as you huff out in frustration. 

  They are having way too much fun. 

  ****

  When you finally returned to the party Ken had decidedly had enough of Barbie flirting with Santiago and ditched Ben. 

  Ben managed to find someone he could talk to about his upcoming fights and Will was still nowhere to be found. Frankie and Santi looked like they were having a serious conversation in the kitchen and their eyes on you were suddenly too much. You needed some fresh air as you stepped out on the back deck. Of course there seemed to be no place that wasn’t occupied with guests, as you say your excuse me’a and make your way down the steps to find a modicum of privacy. 

  The smokey sweet aroma of tobacco and chocolate permeates your senses as you follow the trail coming from around the house. Will is leaned back, head against the wall with one leg propped up as he stares up at the rings disappearing into the clear night sky. 

  He holds out his hand and you hesitate, you’re not sure you could take anymore moments of being brought to the edge…but it’s Will. His large calloused hand takes yours as he pulls you into his chest making you face out. You sigh into the warmth and you’re enveloped by his cologne and the smell of the cigar. 

  “How are you feeling Honey?” Honestly…like you’re all trying to kill me.

  “I’m fine.” He tsks under his breath as he kisses your neck, he breathes in deep as if you’re having the same affect on him as they are on you. 

  “I don’t like that answer…you tell me if you don’t want to do this.” Always the one to check in with you, he’s so sweet even when his own resolve is breaking. 

  You doubt he’s expecting your next move when you spin in his arms and grip him by the collar of his shirt as you crash your lips to his.The taste of tobacco and mint fresh on his tongue. He’s lost momentarily as he moans into the kiss, not caring about who could come around this corner at any moment. You pull away, reveling in the way he chases after you. His hooded lids staring you down as you brush your thumb along his swollen pink lips. 

  “I want to do this, I just don’t think I can take anymore teasing baby.” Will’s a private man so your pet names are reserved for your private moments, but you can see the moonlight luminate in his eyes as the blue practically disappears. 

  “Come on Honey, all you had to do was ask.” You scoff at that as he yanks your hand and practically runs you up the back steps back into the house. 

  When you enter the kitchen Benny,Frankie and Santi are all standing in the corner with knowing looks on their face and Will signals it’s time to go. 

  Santi and Frankie are out the door before you can blink as you pull back slightly in Will's grasp. “Shouldn’t Frankie say bye to his boss?” 

  “No time sweetheart, we’re late for a very important date.” 

  “Seriously Will, you’re going to steal my only line.” Ben skips along in front of you both as you exit the grandiose home. 

  “You had all night to use it, it’s not my fault you’re too slow.” 

  ****

  You thought you would’ve been more nervous or feel unprepared but it seems as you lay out completely exposed on Santiago’s bed as you try and keep track of the hands all over you, it sends a surge of confidence through you. 

  Santiago had taken control right away, the guys already had some sort of plan hatched out as you could’ve guessed by the way they were silently communicating every step. 

  The ride home was less than romantic as they went over your safe word and hard no’s. That shifted as soon as Frankie pinned you against the front door, too impatient to wait any longer before touching you as he unzipped your dress leaving it in a pool of fabric beneath you. 

  He knelt down on the floor, raising your leg over his shoulder as you gripped on tight to his soft curls. Your panties lost in one of his pockets earlier left easier access to you as he licked a stripe through your wet folds. Your head hits the door as you try to stay standing, already so worked up from before. 

  You’re a whimpering mess as Frankie works you open like a man starved. “You always taste so good hermosa.” 

  “Frank!” Santi reappears in the entryway naked and hard, looking as though he’s gonna spit fire. 

  “What?” You’d laugh if you weren’t so close to your first climax of the night as his nose nudged your clit. 

  “Bedroom?!” He sighs into you sending a chill up your spine as he fights against every urge to ignore Pope and continue his ministrations. He looks up at you almost apologetically as he places a kiss on each thigh. 

  ****

  “Fuck baby that feels so good.” Will’s grip is tight in your hair as he works his cock deeper down your throat. You can’t manage more than a whine as you try to focus on Santi thrusting behind you, slamming you further onto Will's cock with every switch of his hips. 

  “Do you have any idea how good you look right now?” Frankie pants beside you as Ben works his hand up and down Frankie’s length. 

  The praise and attention has you keening as you arch back into Santi’s chest. His hand on your hip is sure to leave a bruise as he pounds into you relentlessly. He’s close, he can tell you are too as you clench him tighter and moan out his name. 

  “Santi, I can’t.” You’ve lost count on how many times you’ve come. On Frankie’s tongue, on Will's fingers. When you were sitting on Bennys lap with Santi’s face buried in your cunt, you thought you were close to passing out. 

  “Tell me what you need.” You’ve never seen Santi as sweet or gentle as you have when he was methodically taking you apart. 

  You weren’t sure they heard when you whispered more. Santi was sure he heard you loud and clear as he asked if you were sure. Your pathetic mule as you chase his hips was all the answer he needed as he slowly pulled out of you. He gives a silent signal to Frankie as he replaces Will's spot on the bed.

  Frankie’s wrecked, his own orgasm held off this entire time in anticipation for this. His sweat slicked curls cling to his face as he guides your hips above his throbbing erection. He  grips the base of his cock as he slides the tip through your swollen folds. As you sink down onto him he moans in unison with you as a cold sensation meets your other hole. Santi smears the lube around your sensitive nub with his thumb and he nearly chokes at the way you push back onto it. 

  “Stop teasing Santiago.” Frankie rasps out between muttered curses as he bucks his hips into you. 

  Santi is a tease but at this moment he can’t hold on much longer. Your grip on Frankie tightens as Santi prods your entrance, the tip just barely in almost has you seeing stars. Will’s behind Santi working his length as he watches him pick up his pace. Ben’s lips are on yours as he reaches between you to rub slow circles on your clit. “Oh fuck…oh my god.”  

  “I need you to come cariño.” Santi grits out behind you as his hips start to stutter. 

  Frankie plants his feet in the mattress as he pounds up into you, a lewd moan leaves your lips as you cling to someone’s hand. Benny singing sweet praises in your ear of how good you’re doing as your body heaves and your heart threatens to pound out of your chest. 

  The smallest sound leaves your mouth as you cease up in pleasure, it rolls over you in waves as they both stutter their hips spilling into, the only sounds in the room are moans and pants as you collapse into a puddle in the middle of the bed. 

  You come too with concerned faces surrounding you as Will cleans you up gently with a damp towel. 

  “I told you, you went too hard.”

  “Me…I’m not the one who made her come three times.” 

  Ben notices your blissed out face as you suppress a giggle. He leans down, pressing a soft kiss to your lips. His dopey smile is on full display as the other men bicker behind him. 

  “You ready for round two Honey?” 

Comments and reblogs are much appreciated

@csarab615 @syrupsstuff @ghostslillady @uudelally @onefinnedwonder-fm @thedreadandthefugitivemind @romanarose @scarletthefierce @heather1482 @pikapuff-316

#frankie morales x reader #frankie x f!reader x santiago #triple frontier boys x reader #tf poly x reader #will miller x female reader #benny miller x frankie morales #benny miller x reader #triple frontier smut #triple frontier fanfic #kinktober 2023 #santiago garcia x francisco morales #francisco catfish morales #santiago pope garcia x reader #triple frontier #triple frontier boys #pimowrites #santiago garcia smut #triple frontier x you

[penvisions]

the melting point {{masterlist}}

Fandom: Triple Frontier 

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Baker! Reader (ex EMT! Reader)

Summary: Running from the past to a new city gave you the perfect opportunity to open your own bakery. You're a regular at Brass Knuckles, and the owner is the right type of friendly you need in your life. Along with him, comes his group of friends, one Frankie Morales. You develop a crush on him nearly instantly. Can you manage to get your head above water long enough to tell him he's the most gorgeous man you've ever met?

Word Count: 68.9k - ongoing 

Warnings: hurt and comfort, light angst, mild violence, one (1) instance of stalking, talk of past gun violence, ptsd, reader has trauma similar to the triple frontier guys, reader is described as having tattoos for plot points, reader is handicapped (expanded on in later chapters), reader has mobility issues, adult content, smut, p in v smut, oral (m and f receiving), the whole gang is here, plus oc inserts 

*these are just general warnings, each chapter has a detailed list for specific content

A/N: this is a self indulgent fic in which my dream of opening a bakery comes true, and hey, if a man built like a wall and had curls for days became a regular, that would be okay too c;

chapter one || chapter two

chapter three || chapter four

chapter five || chapter six

chapter seven || chapter eight 

chapter nine || chapter ten

chapter eleven || chapter twelve

chapter thirteen || chapter fourteen 

chapter fifteen || chapter sixteen

chapter seventeen || chapter eighteen

chapter nineteen || chapter twenty

#triple frontier #triple frontier fic #triple frontier fanfic #triple frontier movie #pedro pascal #pedro boys #pedro boy fic #frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales x you #frankie morales x f!reader #frankie morales x baker!reader #frankie morales fic #frankie morales fanfic #santiago pope garcia #will miller #benny miller #brass knuckles #frankie fish morales #call sign nicknames #dev talks #dev writes #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal movie #santiago garcia #will ironhead miller #frankie morales smut #the melting point #smut #fluff

[musings-of-a-rose]

I'm having a Sparks and Benny thought here. Based on this pic. Both of them arrive at home from a Xmas party at Will's. Things got hot really quick.

Note this was supposed to be in your ask box. I messaged ya this thought. My bad! Holiday brain!

The Party

Pairing: Benny Miller x “Sparks” f!reader

Word Count: 1300+

Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!

Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story. 

Notes: I miss the HELL out of these 2 so please continue to send in anything! Also I’m changing this up to a New Year’s Party because I couldn’t finish it in time for Christmas. And then I was even more late! Thank you for being so patient and waiting!! (This was not beta read)

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Benny Miller Masterlist

“Did we really have to dress all fancy?” Benny whines, rolling his shoulders to shift the suit jacket a little. 

“It’s Will and Makayla’s first New Year’s living together and they wanted to be fancy,” I explain as I knock on the door to Will and Makayla’s place.

“I guess.”

“Plus, it’s my first as Mrs. Miller and I wanted to look pretty.”

Benny’s eyes soften as he looks me, the edges of his gaze darkening. “You’re always gorgeous, Mrs. Miller.” He grips my hips and pulls me to him, releasing one hand to tip my chin up, kissing me softly, the heat slowly warming.

“Get your own porch, asshole.” Will had opened the door and was standing there smirking. 

“You’re right. I’ll just take my wife home then,” Benny pulls me in the direction of his jeep. 

“Nice try. Makayla would kill me if you guys didn’t show up. Come on in.” He opens the door wide and motions for us to enter, fist bumping Benny as he walks past. 

Makayla had gone all out, everything sparkling in silver, gold, and black, like a modern day Gatsby party. People had already arrived and Benny steers me towards Frankie and Monica, Santi off in the corner making out with a girl, whom I shockingly recognize. 

“Is Santi with the same girl he brought to the bar a month ago?” I whisper to Frankie and Monica. 

She nods. “Yeah! I think this one is sticking around, surprisingly enough.”

We chat with them for a bit, Makayla flitting over for a few minutes before being whisked away on a champagne emergency. The music is going, some people getting up to dance. Will recruits Benny to help him with something in the kitchen, so I pull Monica onto the dance floor, whispering to her that we’re going to be menaces to our respective husbands. 

We start dancing to the upbeat song, hands on each others hips as we sway and move to the song, her spinning me around so my back is flush with her front. And that’s when I see him, Benny, emerging from the kitchen and freezing, his eyes on me as I dance. Judging by the light chuckle in my ear from Monica, I’m guessing she caught Frankie’s eye too.

“Wanna torture them some more, Sparks?” She says close to my ear.

“Hell yeah.”

I follow her lead, moving my body as she guides me, our hips moving in tandem as she pulls me closer to her. For good measure, I lift my arm, wrapping it around the back of her head, trying not to giggle when she squeezes just a little too much on my inner hips. And then the song ends, Monica and I laughing as she hugs me.

“That was way too much fun, Sparks.”

“Yeah it was. Did you see their-”

Suddenly, Monica was ripped from my grasp, Frankie’s hand firmly clamped around her upper arm, a smirk and a wink tossed my way from her as he steers her away through the group of people. 

“You think you’re so funny, don’t you?” Benny had snuck up behind me, his hands now on my hips, his nose nuzzling in my hair as he speaks low in my ear. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was dancing, good sir.”

He chuckles and it makes goosebumps pop up down my arm. “Yeah. Dancing. Sure.” He  makes to pull me away, to find some secluded spot but then Will clanks a spoon on a glass and everyone turns, Benny groaning a little too loud so I elbow him softly in the ribs. 

Will puts his arm around Makayla next to him before speaking. “I just want to thank everyone for coming. We’re so excited to share our first New Year’s Eve with everyone we love and we’ve been working hard- ok. Makayla has been working hard. I just do what she says,” laughing flits around the group as Makayla playfully slaps his chest, leaving her hand on his toned pec. “But seriously. Thank you guys. Here’s to another great year!”

—----

The toast was had, the ball was dropped, the midnight kiss was a little too risque between you and Benny, Will not so covertly throwing an empty Solo cup at Benny’s head. 

“Ugh I’ve been dying to take these shoes off all night!” I groan, kicking my heels off and plopping down in one of our comfy chairs. 

“You looked hot though.”

“That’s the price of fashion. Pain.”

He chuckles as he removes his jacket, revealing that he wore a simple, plain black shirt underneath it, the fabric stretching and pulling as he tosses the jacket on the back of the couch and sits with a sigh. I look over at him, feeling warm watching his movements.

“Did..did you really wear a black t-shirt under your dress jacket?”

Benny looks down at his shirt, his eyebrows pulled together. “Should I not have?”

“No, no. I think it works.”

He brushes his chest and I almost come unglued. “Good.”

“Wanna see what’s under mine?”

His big blue eyes snap to mine. “Fuck yeah I do.”

I get up, standing in front of him as I pull my dress over my head, hearing his sharp intake of breath as I reveal his favorite lingerie set on me, complete with black garter belts.

“You…you had this on the whole time?”

I nod, moving to straddle him. He grips my hips, sliding his hands up to my ribs as he kisses my chest, his mustache tickling my skin causing me to chuckle. But then he grips me tight, standing abruptly and sets me in the chair, draping each of my legs over the arms of the chair. He kneels, his eyes dark and all-consuming as he stares between my legs. 

“Can you buy new underwear?”

“I think so.”

I barely get my reply out before he grips my panties, ripping the part that covers me, tucking the ripped ends up. His large hands squeeze my inner thighs and before I can say anything, his mouth is on me, warm and lapping, my legs trying to squeeze around him. He holds me open, his fingers digging deeper into my skin as I moan his name, electric sparks rolling over me as his tongue changes patterns. One of my hands grips the chair and the other moves to his hair, tugging hard and whining when his growl vibrates me. 

“Oh fuck! Ben, I -” The sounds he pulls from me are loud and grateful, Benny leaving his mouth on me to work me down. But I don’t have time to relax as he stands, pulling me up only to spin me, pushing my upper back down, the sound of a zipper loud in the quiet apartment. He drags himself through the wetness between my thighs before pushing and I slap the chair, trying to find something, anything to grip.

“Can’t believe you were wearing this the whole night and didn’t tell me,” Benny pants behind me, setting a rougher pace just hear the panted whines tumble from my lips. 

My hands scramble, still trying to find purchase as he presses harder, faster, but then he folds himself over me, engulfing me from behind, his large hands sliding down my arms, his fingers lacing with mine, holding my hands as he continues to push in further. I turn my head to the side, feeling myself hurtle towards the edge again as he brushes against that spot at the back of me. 

“Oh fuck, Benny! Please..please!” I come, tightening around him, his breaths panting out across my neck as he buries his face, turning his head slightly to bite my shoulder as he comes, his hips pushing in a few more times as he releases. His bite turns to kisses, nuzzling into my hair before he whispers.

“I love you, Sparks.”

I manage to finally catch my breath. “Don’t you mean Mrs. Miller?”

“Fuck!” He pulls out but stands, picking me up to throw me over his shoulder with a squeal as he stomps down the hallway, spending the next few hours showing me exactly what being called Mrs. Miller does to him.

—----

General Taglist:

@frankie-catfish-morales @chaoticgeminate @janebby @astoryisaloveaffair @balekanemohafe @greeneyedblondie44 @hoeforthefictional @marvelousmermaid @hauntedmama @giuliarogers @icanbeyourjedi @wretchedmo @sunnshineeexoxo @livingmydreams13 @adventures-of-a-noodle @sara-alonso @theewokingdead @punkerthanpascal @giggly-otter @f0rever15elf @phandoz @dirtytissuebox @gallowsjoker @lovesbiggerthanpride @sarahmilesbendrix @booksarekindaneat @mrsudontknowme @swol-bear @charlispersonallyhell @xoxabs88xox @amneris21 @gooddaykate @alindeluce @avengers-fixation @paintballkid711 @harriedandharassed  @ladykatakuri @marrianena  @practicalghost @withakindheartx @batdarkladyvampir @justanotherkpopstanlol  @mermaidxatxheart @alexxavicry @ichigodjarin @justreblogginfics @sullyosully @kmc1989 @veryprairieberry @mysterious-moonstruck-musings  

#benny miller #ben miller #benny miller x reader #benny miller x you #benny miller x f!reader #triple frontier #garrett hedlund #benjamin miller #benjamin benny miller #garrett hedlund x reader #garrett hedlund x you #garrett hedlund characters #garrett hedlund character fanfic #garrett hedlund character ff #garrett hedlund character fanfiction

[reveluving]

I have another ideaaaa 👀 I imagine Santi and Benny being very flamboyant when it comes to showing their admiration for someone. Imagine Rick bringing lunch to reader’s unexpectedly just to see Santi bringing her flowers and Benny giving her the heart eyes. My poor flag baby might have a stroke just from the scene in front of hiiimmm!!

a/n: Aria, baby. it’s been a long ass time ✋🏼😔 BUT THE FIXATION IS BACK (kinda. largely because I’ve been reading fics after fics of Oscar & Pedro chars. RAAAAAH). so we’re here baby, after 1 ½? 2 years later???? ENJOY

warnings: humour & fluff; poor Rick just wants to love you in peace.

j.k. m.list (series under 'rick flag vs the triple frontier boys'), or check out my full m.list!

Oh, you know Rick’s eyes are TWITCHING. The paper bag in his hand, packed with lunch from your favourite stop, crumpling in his grasp, almost tearing at the top. Not the food though, he’s not trying to ruin his wife’s favourite. 

But he’s chill. Absolutely chill. He swears. 

Benny and Santi just had to stop by the same time he came home from work, both leaning against the white porch railing while you sat prettily on the bench. 

Benny was expressive in whatever he was talking about, likely his last boxing match from the way he was holding the air in a headlock before the three of you shared a laugh. As much of a troublemaker they were, they were your friends, after all. He’d chase them off his property or warn them with a glare any day if it meant cutting off any form of ‘allegiances’ with that horrible past, both yours and his.

Just when you were about to reply to God knows what they asked, you noticed Rick lingering by the mailbox. Your eyes lit up, and it didn’t take the duo any other hints to know that he was home.

“Rick!” You enthusiastically waved at your husband, beckoning him to sit on the bench next to you. Rick couldn’t help but smile back at you, walking over and ignoring the two until he reached the top step of the stairs.

“Boys.” He greeted them, going over to shake Santiago’s hand before Benny’s, flexing his hands as they shook to see if the other would break. None did, as usual, pulling away and somewhat putting the tension on hold in favour of you. Rick took a seat next to you, passing you the bag of food and a soft ‘there y’go, baby’ (but not really, he made sure the two would hear it). 

It took a few seconds, making sure he greeted you with a kiss before stretching his arm to lay on the backrest behind you.

“So, what’s the occasion?”

“The boys just came over to say hi. Gave me these flowers from the flower shop nearby,” You raised the calla lilies that were resting on your lap. Now, Rick was no flower specialist, but he has been to the shop countless times to buy you your own fix. 

And if he remembered correctly, they generally represented beauty.

Well played.

“And Santi was just telling me about this new Cuban restaurant just outside the neighbourhood.” You continued, turning to Santiago with an encouraging smile so he could tell Rick about it.

“Cuban restaurant, huh?” 

Santiago curtly nodded to his curiosity. 

“The best. Might even be your new favourite once you both try it.” He explained, only to glance at the paper bag Rick was holding—a look that was almost… Judgemental? Critical? All of the above? All Rick knew that the man before him was silently scoffing at his choice. 

And, well, Santi wouldn’t exactly deny that claim, either. 

Rick didn’t hide the scoff, only to pair it with a faux smile so you could take it as nothing more than a harmless banter, “Gotta be real good then. ‘Cause this here,” He cocked his head in the paper bag’s direction, “Is my wife’s favourite place. Our favourite place.”

Rick not only had to watch out for the bold claim Santi was making, but he also had to bear in mind the sight of Benny openly looking at you like a lovestruck puppy. The promising boxer didn’t even care about the passive-aggressive argument going on around him. He was just appreciating the beaut in front of him.

(Man’s just doesn’t give a shit atm).

“Hey, I’m not here to burst your bubble,” Santi huffed in amusement, raising his hands in a defensive way, “But I’m not trying to give the pretty girl any mediocre recommendations either. C’mon Flag, you, of all people, should know that we want the best for her.”

“Aw, Santi, you’re too kind.” You were touched and it showed, and Rick couldn’t argue with the statement. Without a doubt, he wants what was best for you, be it food, comfortable clothes, gourmet treats for the fucking neighbourhood cat you adore—anything. 

In the midst of their silent argument, you reached for Rick’s hand, holding his larger ones in between yours, “I’m sure Rick and I will enjoy it,” He mirrored the warm smile as you stared into each other’s eyes for a moment, only to break when you addressed the two, “And if it’s as good as you said it is, we might as well have a get together.”

Oh. 

You were growing concerned of the two’s silence, eyes darting back and forth and almost—almost asking what was wrong until Benny, as if snapped out of his trance, finally, spoke up. 

“Absolutely.” Benny raised his hand in a manner that a believer would in church. 

Abso-fucking-lutely.

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

» gorgeous rose divider by the amazing @firefly-graphics ♡

#— reve's reverie 🌹 #— reve's asks 🌹 #rick flag x reader #rick flag x f!reader #rick flag x female reader #rick flag x reader fluff #rick flag x you #joel kinnaman #joel kinnaman x reader #tss 2021 #benny miller x reader #benny miller x f!reader #benny miller x female reader #benny miller x you #benny miller #santiago garcia #santiago garcia x reader #santiago garcia x f!reader #santiago garcia x female reader #santiago garcia x you #santiago pope garcia #triple frontier #triple frontier x reader #triple frontier x you #rick flag vs the triple frontier boys

[avastrasposts]

The Pilot and his Girl - ch. 30

We left Frankie in a pretty bad state at the end of the last chapter and now we need to get through that as his girl and the guys begin to really worry about where his actions are leading him. And Joel steps in of course, but perhaps not in the best way.

I just want to add too, that this chapter included a conversation that has been a long time coming but it was very hard to write since neither man wants to talk about it and I can just hope I did them both justice.

I just want to add too, since some people are nervous about it; I LOVE hearing your thoughts and comments on what I write, even if the chapter is months and months old! It's my favourite thing about posting here and on Ao3, hearing your thoughts as you read through the fic, so please, share with me!

Series Master List

Chapter 31 - Warnings have their own post - Word count: 7.7k

You wake with a start, your body jerking you awake with panicked breaths. The bedroom is light, the window faces south and a weak sun is glinting through the closed curtain which means you slept far longer than usual, the sun rises late in the Massachusetts winter months. You rush to push back the comforter and hurry out into the living room. The blanket is pushed back on the couch and Frankie is not there, and not in the kitchen either. As you turn to the bathroom you see what’s missing, his boots, his jacket and backpack. 

“Fuck!” you groan loudly and run back to the bedroom, grabbing your clothes from last night and rushing to put them on. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You feel an urgent need to get to Frankie, to talk to him. It’s not like him to leave, certainly not in the middle of an argument, and never, ever, has he left in the morning without saying anything to you. Something is not right, it feels like the two of you have crossed a line that you need to get you both back behind. 

You tie your boots and shrug your winter coat on, your first stop is Pope’s place. You hammer on his door and he throws it open, his face falling when he sees your expression. 

“Frankie came home drunk last night and now he’s left again, I don’t know where he is!” you blurt out as Pope lets you into his apartment. 

“Slow down, hermana,” he says, grabbing hold of your shoulders, steadying you, “From the beginning.” 

“Frankie and I got into an argument about what he did when he was on that run with Will, he couldn’t understand why I thought he was too violent,” you say, trying to calm yourself, but your hands are shaking and Pope grabs them, holding them together between his own. “Then Joel came by, right in the middle of it, something about planning a new run, and Frankie just left with him, saying he needed to think. And then he came back late last night , really drunk and passed out on the couch, and now he’s gone! He never leaves without saying goodbye and I don’t know where he is!” Your voice breaks on the last word and Pope lets go of your hands, bending down to grab his boots. 

“We’ll go find him, we’ll go to Benny’s first, Tommy said something yesterday about meeting there.” He looks up at you while he laces his boots, “Don’t worry, hermana, it’s early still, he can’t have gone that far.” 

…

“Tell me again what this FEDRA guy told you about the raiders?” Benny asks Joel as they duck under a broken piece of the highway and head into an old sewage tunnel. 

“A small FEDRA patrol saw a bunch of them down in Dorchester, if we take them out, we get to keep the supplies,” Joel replies, stepping around a dead rat. 

“And you trust this guy?” 

“Yeah, he owes me a favor, I saved his ass a couple of times. And he’s given me tips before, they’ve always been solid, nothing this big though.” 

“Alright, as long as you think it’s a legit tip,” Benny nods and falls back a bit, Frankie’s right behind him, Tommy taking up the rear. 

“You ok, Fish? You look a bit pale,” Benny says, his voice lower for the benefit of his friend. 

“Yeah, just slept like shit, and we had a fucking early wake up call,” Frankie grumbles, pulling the bill of his cap down lower over his eyes.

“Tell me about it,” Benny sighs, “Eve just woke up to say goodbye, then she went right back to sleep. Wish I could’ve stayed in bed with her.” 

“Mmhm, same,” Frankie mutters, pausing as they come to the end of the tunnel.

“Ok, on your toes now, we've got to go out in the open here,” Joel says, waving the other three men forwards. 

…

The trek down to Dorchester is smooth, and it doesn’t take long for them to find the raiders' small camp. They’ve set up on the top floor of an office building and Benny and Frankie silently take out the two guards at the bottom of the stairs. It gets messy when they reach the top and they have to open fire but Joel tosses in a homemade smoke bomb and after that they can just pick off the raiders as they come stumbling out. 

They pick through the raider’s supplies and fill their packs, it’s a pretty good haul and Benny starts searching for any food they might’ve hidden, coming across a door that’s been blocked off with a filing cabinet. 

“Hey, Catfish! Give me a hand with this!” he calls to Frankie, “Cover me in case they’ve locked a fucking infected in here or something.” 

Frankie stands a few feet from the door with his rifle raised as Benny puts his shoulder to the filing cabinet and pushes it out of the way. The door swings open and Benny jumps out of the way. 

“Oh fuck, shit! Man, that’s foul!” 

The dead boy of a young woman falls out across the doorway, her body must’ve been propped against the door, and judging by the stench, she’s been dead a while. The body of another young woman is curled up on a dirty mattress, she’s less far gone, her emaciated features still clear. Both women are naked and Benny swallows hard and glances back at Frankie as they both realize why the women were locked up. 

“We should’ve killed those fucking raiders slower,” Frankie growls, turning away from the room and Benny follows him. 

“Let’s get the fuck out of here and back to the QZ”. 

Back down at street level again Joel takes the lead and moves down the way they came, covering a couple of blocks before Benny suddenly signals for everyone to halt. 

“Heads up, I hear a car,” he calls in a low voice to the others. 

“More raiders,” Joel says, “C’mon, we’ll ambush them, this is the only cleared street.” He looks around the block they’re on and points to cars that have been pushed aside on either side of the street. “Frankie, Benny, hide behind either car, cover me. Tommy, get behind me. I’ll make them stop, usual way should work, if not, just shoot ‘em.” 

“Joel, you sure?” Benny interrupts, “How do we know they’re raiders? We should hang back and observe, see if they go for the base we cleared.” 

“No, then we just have to clear them out again and this time they’ll be on their guard,” Joel scowls, “Get in position!”

“I don’t think this is a good idea,” Benny shakes his head, looking over at Frankie who’s already moved into cover, “Fish? You ok with this?” 

“Joel’s right, it’s probably the same group of raiders, we need to take them out.” 

“Get in position, Benjamin, or stay the fuck out of our way, they’re almost here,” Joel points to the other car, staring at Benny. The younger man takes a deep breath, glancing over at Frankie again who motions with his head to get behind the car. 

“Fuck!” Benny growls and grips his rifle, ducking behind cover with an angry scowl. 

Joel quickly gets into position as the rumbling engine comes closer, keeping an eye out for the car. As it gets closer Benny sees it, it’s a small beat up sedan with several bullet holes in the sides. He glances over at Frankie and gives him a hand signal, indicating three people inside. Frankie nods and passes on the message to Tommy just as the car drives down the block they’re on. Ahead of him, Benny suddenly hears Joel give up a loud shout, stumbling out of the alley into the path of the car, his hand clutching his side, the other raised to the driver. 

The others watch, guns ready and hidden out of sight, as the car barrells towards Joel, who’s staggering across the road. Suddenly the driver slams the brakes and the car skids to a halt in front of Joel. From his hiding place Benny sees the driver open the door and step up on the instep, aiming a gun at Joel. 

“Hey, I-I need help, p-please,” Joel stutters, holding up the hand that’s not holding his side, where he’s conveniently hidden his handgun. 

“What’s wrong with you?” the driver calls as Joel stumbles closer, the man is still half hidden behind the door and Joel’s trying to get around to his side so he half falls to the side, taking several stuttering steps sideways. 

“You infected?” the driver says, following Joel with his gun, “Can’t help you then I’m afraid.” 

“R-raiders,” Joel coughs, “ran into a whole bunch.” 

Benny looks over at Frankie, he’s got a clear shot at the driver and he’s aiming at him. Benny signals at him to hold his fire, these guys don’t sound like raiders, but Frankie’s shaking his head, squeezing his rifle as the man continues to keep his gun on Joel. 

“Be careful, Dan!” a man in the car suddenly calls and Joel straightens up, pulling his gun, aiming at the man. A shot rings out and the driver slumps forward, a clean shot though his head. 

“God dammit, Frankie!” Benny yells, lifting his own rifle as the man in the car dives for the fallen man’s gun. Joel fires on him but misses and the man takes off running. On his right Ben hears Tommy open fire on the third person in the car as Joel yells. 

“Shoot his leg, Frankie, take him down alive!” The man is running as fast as he can down the block but two shots ring out and he yells, tumbling to the ground as blood bursts from his thigh. 

“Secure him, Benny,” Frankie yells and advances on the car, rifle raised. Benny keeps his gun on the fallen man and moves up to him, he’s splayed on his back, gripping his thigh, whimpering. 

“Oh fuck, please, please don’t kill me!” he says, trying to crawl backwards away from Benny. 

“Just stay still, I’m not gonna hurt you unless you give me a reason,” Benny says, keeping his distance as he glances back at the car. Frankie’s jogging towards him and behind him, Joel steps into the car and a woman screams. 

“No, no, don’t hurt her! She’s my sister!” the man on the ground shouts and Benny turns his head back to him as Frankie joins him. 

“What’s going on, Fish?” he says in a voice low enough for the man not to hear. 

“The third passenger is a woman, Joel’s questioning her about who they are and where they’re going.” 

“Fish! These guys are obviously not raiders, what the fuck are we doing?” Benny glances back at the car as another high pitched scream comes from the woman and the man on the ground shouts. 

“Get off her you fucking prick! I’m gonna fucking kill you!” 

Frankie raises his rifle and aims at the man, “Easy there, he’s just questioning her.” 

“What the fuck, Frankie, this is not how we treat civilians!”

“What fucking civilians? We can’t trust anyone, Benny, you saw what the raiders did to those two women!” Frankie growls. 

“Yeah, but these guys are barely armed!” Benny nudges the dropped gun on the ground with his boot, badly maintained and rusty. 

“And how the fuck were we supposed to know that?” Frankie asks, his rifle still trained on the bleeding man who’s whimpering, clutching his leg and looking towards the car. 

“Maybe we don’t attack just anyone who drives past!” Benny hisses at Frankie, his eyebrows drawn tight with anger and frustration. “This is so fucked up, Fish!”

“Is he still alive?” Joel barks as he walks over, leaving Tommy to watch over the woman in the car. 

“Yeah, but he’s bleeding, we need to get a tourniquet on that leg soon,” Benny replies, “Joel, what the fuck are we doing here? These guys are not raiders.” 

Joel doesn’t reply, instead he walks up to the man on the ground and kneels down, Frankie’s gun is still trained on him, but Benny has let his drop, pointing it at the ground instead. 

“You sister is it?” he asks of the man, putting his hand over the gunshot wound on the thigh. 

The man nods, looking petrified under Joel’s hard stare.He yelps loudly when Joel’s hand squeezes the injured area, digging his fingers in. 

“Your sister told me where you came from, and where you’re going. You’d better tell me the same thing she did, or I’m telling my guy over there to shoot her knee off, you understand?” Joel’s voice is hard and low, slowly squeezing the man’s leg tighter. 

“Worcester!” the younger man blurts out, “We came from Worcester, and we’re heading for the Boston QZ but we got attacked and got lost. Please don’t hurt her, she’s my only family!”

“Have you got any supplies apart from what’s in the car?” 

“No, no, I s-swear, we’ve got n-nothing!” the man stutters, groaning under the pain of Joel’s hand digging into his injured leg, “Please, we’ve got nothing!”

“Good boy,” Joel growls, easing off the man's leg and standing up. 

He comes back to Benny and Frankie, wiping his hand on his trouser leg, “They both say the same thing. I say we leave ‘em and take the car, we can trade for it or stash outside the wall, might come in handy sometime.” 

“Fuck, Joel, we need to take them with us, we can’t leave them out here,” Benny says and looks to Frankie for support but he just gives a hesitant shrug. 

“I don’t know Benny, we can’t trust them,” he says. 

“What fucking choice do we have? Leave them injured out here with no guns?” Benny snarls back at him.

“They’re not our responsibility!” Joel snaps, “Let’s fucking- “ 

All three men freeze as the first tell tale sounds echo between the buildings, the snarling shrieks of dozens of infected reaching them. 

“Runners! Runners!” Tommy yells from the car, “Come on, we need to fucking go!” He rushes to the driver’s side of the car, jumping in and the woman sees her chance, bolting from the car and running for the alley. 

“Leave her, just leave her!” Joel yells as he grabs Frankie and starts running towards the car, “Just start the car, Tommy!”

“Benny, no! Leave him!” Frankie shouts as he sees Benny moving towards the injured man on the ground. “Fucking leave him!” 

“Please, please…just kill me” the man begs, looking back over his shoulder and Benny follows his gaze. 

“Fuck!” he gasps, frozen to the spot for a second before he raises his gun and fires, the man slumping onto the asphalt. Benny spins around and starts running after Frankie, the horde of infected barrelling down the street screeching loudly. 

“Benny! I’m gonna fucking kill you!” Frankie yells, “Get in the car!” 

Tommy’s already got the car moving as Benny catches up, grabbing hold of Frankie’s arm and getting pulled into the back seat. 

“Floor it, Tommy!” Joel shouts, looking back over his shoulder, out the back window. 

…

Thank fuck Tommy’s a good driver, he speeds through the streets, leaving the horde far behind. He only slows down once they enter the area around the QZ and turns off onto a narrow street that Joel directs him to. 

“Here, down there, park between those two cars and we’ll throw some trash on it.” 

The four men quickly make the car look unusable and head towards the QZ, splitting up as they get inside, stepping out into a quiet alley a few blocks from the wall.. 

“Alright, good run, except for the fucking infected,” Joel says, clapping Frankie on the back, “I’ll see you guys at the bar in a couple of days.” 

Frankie nods and Benny throw the brothers a two fingered salute as they leave. 

“Hey Fish, wait up, we need to talk,” Benny says as Frankie turns to leave too. 

“If you’re gonna yell at me for how we handled the people in the car, fucking save it, I already got an earful from Will after our last run,” Frankie says, his shoulders hunched and eyebrows pulled tight, “I don’t need another lecture on how we’re using army tactics on civilians.” 

“Frankie, man, c’mon, you’ve got to admit, that was pretty fucking bad? We should’ve just observed them, not fucking attacked,” Benny rubs his hand over his face, “I mean, why the fuck did Joel even pull that stunt with forcing them to stop? And why did you open fire? I’ve never seen you jump the gun like that, Fish.” 

“The guy in the car, I thought he was about to pull a gun on Joel, so I shot first.” 

“And the interrogation technique? You taught him that?” 

“So what? We do what we need to do to survive.” 

Benny shakes his head, “That was not about survival, I don’t know what the fuck that was!”

“Just fucking leave it, Benny! Ok?” Frankie snaps, scowling at his friend, “I’ll see you later, I need to get something done.” He shoulders his backpack and heads off in the opposite direction of the apartment. 

“Fish, c’mon!” Benny calls after him, but Frankie just gives a dismissive wave of his hand without turning his head as he rounds the corner. 

“Fuck…” Benny mutters and stalks off towards the radio office, he needs to see you. 

…

It feels like deja vu when you find Benny outside the building where Sean lives and has the radio office. 

“I’ve got to talk to you about Frankie,” he says and you feel like your heart stops, you’d been trying to find Frankie all morning, until you had to go to the radio office. Pope promised he’d keep looking, checking back at the apartment during the afternoon. 

“Did something happen to him? Pope and I have been looking for him all day!” you say, grabbing hold of Benny’s arm and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise. 

“He didn’t tell you we were going on a run with Joel and Tommy today?” 

“Benny, is he ok?” You feel like shaking him but you limit yourself to grabbing his arm tighter and Benny nods. 

“Yeah, yeah, he’s fine, he’s fine, he came back with me but he said he had to do something when we got back.” Benny takes in your anxious looking face as it slips into relief and returns your grip on his arm, putting his hand over yours. “He didn’t tell you and he hasn't come to see you yet? Is something going on with you guys?” 

You sigh and feel yourself deflating, your shoulders sagging with relief that Frankie’s ok, but at the same time, that lead weight settles in your stomach as you worry about his behavior again.

“Walk me home, Benny, please,” you ask, “if you have time?” You feel like Benny’s friendly presence next to you is the only thing that will make your feet move down the street as you chew on your bottom lip. 

“Sure, I’ll walk you, I need to get back to Eve but...but maybe that can wait, what’s going on?”

“Tell me what happened when you were with him today,” you say, taking his arm and leaving the front entrance. 

Benny looks around the two of you as you start walking down the street, checking that there is no one near that can overhear first and then he tells you the whole thing. 

“Fuck…” you sigh for what feels like the twentieth time as Benny ends by telling you that Frankie took off after they got back. “His PTSD has been getting worse and both Pope and Will brought it up in the past few days. That last run with Will, things went bad and Pope’s been noticing his behavior being off too.”

You’ve reached the door to your building and you stop, looking up at Benny’s frown. “Yesterday I tried telling him that I think he shouldn’t go on runs with Joel anymore. Joel triggers something in Frankie and…I don’t know…I feel like maybe they aren’t good for each other. They’ve both suffered an unimaginable loss, in the worst possible way, and when Frankie got help, Joel seems to have had to deal with it on his own and it’s made him…just…very dark, like he’s just ‘existing’ and doing what he needs to do to survive…”

“And he has no empathy for others,” Benny fills in, “he didn’t even stop to consider that the people in the car could be just people trying to get to the QZ, and he left them with no second thought when the infected came, it was all about eliminating a potential threat and then about saving himself and Tommy.” Benny swipes his cap off his head and drags his hand through his hair, sighing. “I’m not even sure he would bother to save Frankie and myself, if we hadn’t gotten to that car in time.”

“But Frankie doesn’t see it,” you say, “and when I asked him to not go on runs with Joel anymore because I think it makes his PTSD worse, we got in a huge fight,” you sigh deeply, dropping your eyes to your toes and you feel Benny’s hand on your shoulder. “He got really mad when I said I thought he was too violent with this guy, Frankie threatened to gouge his eye out. But Frankie said he only did what was needed to get the antibiotics for Sean’s grandkid.” You swipe your hand over your cheek as tears start to drip down, “Fuck, I don’t wanna cry again,” you say, anger seeping through your voice, “Fuck!” 

You tilt your head back up and look at Benny’s worried eyes, “Come on, it’s you and Frankie, you’re everything to him, one fight doesn’t ruin it,” he says, rubbing your shoulder

“He walked out, Benny, right in the middle of the fight. He’s never done that before, he just took off with Joel. And then he came home really drunk and we started arguing again and he passed out on the couch, he said he thought I didn’t want him in my bed anymore. And then this morning he left again, without saying anything. He went outside the wall and didn’t even say goodbye.” Tears spill over properly now and you sniffle, trying to stem the flow, but the nerves of the day catches up with you. Benny starts rubbing his hands up and down your arms, trying to comfort you. 

“Let’s get you inside, Frankie might be home already, you two need to talk it out, c’mon,” Benny gently hooks his arm around your shoulder and guides you through the door and up the stairs. You fumble out your keys and unlock your front door, opening up to a still dark apartment. 

“Alright, he’s not home yet, but he’ll be here soon, I’ll wait with you until he turns up,” Benny says and starts to lift off his still heavy backpack and you stop him. 

“No, please, go home to Eve. I know she’s worried about you since you went outside, get back home. I’ll be fine, and Pope’s next door if I need anything.” You put your hands on his chest and try, and fail, to nudge the big man towards the door. 

“You sure? I’ll wait for him, and slap some sense into him if needed, just say the word,” Benny replies, tilting his head down to catch your eyes properly. 

“I’m sure, Benny, please go home,” you give him another pointless shove and he gives with a small smile. 

“Ok, if you’re sure I’ll go, but give me a hug first,” he says and bends down, capturing you between his long arms. Benny’s signature bear hugs are all encompassing and he lifts you up, shaking you gently and making you giggle through your tears. 

“Just remember, it’s you and Frankie, you’re the love of his life. All he does, he does for you, if he’s lost his way, all he needs is for you to bring him back home. To you.” 

“Benny, when did you become so insightful?” you smile weakly as he puts you down on your feet. 

“Not insightful, I’ve just watched you two over the past, what is it? Eleven years now? And with Eve, I get it, what you two have. I’d do anything for her, and I know that’s all Frankie ever wants to do for you.” 

“Get back to her, Benny, before you make me cry again,” you say, giving his arm a final squeeze before he steps through the door. “I’ll see you soon.” 

“I’ll come by the radio tomorrow and check on you, ok?” 

“Ok, Benny, stay safe, love you!”

“Love you too, sis!” he calls as he jogs down the stairs. 

…

You try to keep busy while you wait for Frankie; preparing dinner, cleaning the apartment, you even pull out your gun and start disassembling it on the coffee table to get it cleaned. It’s dark before he comes home, you hear his footsteps in the hallway first and then the key. Even before he opens the door you know something’s wrong, he struggles with the key in the lock, fumbling with the handle and you stand up, leaving the pieces of the gun on the table. 

“Frankie?” you ask as the door shuts behind him, “Are you ok?” You walk over to the front door, and he glances up at you before he drops his backpack by the door. 

“Yeah, ‘s fine,” he mumbles, shrugging off his jacket and hanging it on the hook. “Went out with Benny today.” 

“I know, Benny stopped by the radio,” you say, your body freezing as he shuffles past, only briefly pausing to drop a peck on your cheek, perfunctory. He smells of whiskey, fresh whiskey, like he’s just been drinking. 

You don’t even know where to start as you follow him into the kitchen, the argument last night, him leaving this morning without saying anything, his run with Joel today or the way he stumbles around the kitchen table towards the stove. 

“Frankie…” you say again, making your voice soft, you feel like you’re talking to a child, or a wild animal, not your sweet Frankie who you know so well. When he doesn’t even react, let alone look over at you, you dig your nails into the palms of your hands, reminding yourself that this is his PTSD, this is not your Frankie. 

“Frankie, talk to me please,” you start again, coming up next to him at the counter, you put your hand on his arm. 

“What did Benny tell you? That we went out again?” he says, still not looking at you, his tone clipped. 

“Yes, he said you took out some raiders and then…” you pause, you don’t know how to phrase it but Frankie does it for you. He steps away from you, and leans against the counter on the other side of the kitchen. 

“H-he told you we took out three people in a car, that I shot one of the guys when I shouldn’t have, right? That’s what he told you? T-that I’m out of control and violently torturing civilians?” His voice is harsh, there’s an edge to it you don’t recognise and he’s still not looking at you. 

“He’s worried about you, Frankie, and I’m too,” you say, “you haven’t been yourself these past few months.” You try to find his eyes but he’s got the bill of his cap pulled low, eyes on the floor two feet in front and his fingers are twitching, nervously. 

“I already told you, I do what I need to do, to stay safe,” he mutters, the edge still sharp in his voice, crossing his arms tight over his chest, crossing his legs too, closing himself off from you. 

“Benny said they were civilians, just trying to get to the QZ- “ you start to say but Frankie suddenly flares up. 

“We’d just taken out a gang of raiders! It could’ve been more of them! The guy was about to pull a fucking gun on Joel, so I took the shot!” He throws his arms out, meeting your eyes for the first time. “You can’t fucking trust anyone, it’s us or them and I do what I need to do to survive! They could’ve attacked and killed us instead, then what?” 

“But you were never like that before, Frankie!” you can’t help but raise your voice in frustration. When he worked with Pope in Arlington, or when you traveled up to New York with Benny and Pope, he was never so calloused, so distrusting and rash. “You used to observe, calculate the risks, you never rushed into situations, but since you started working more with Joel…I don’t know Frankie, it’s like he rubs off on you.” You drop your hands to your sides, you suddenly realize you’ve mimicked Frankie and thrown them open but now you sigh, lower them and take a deep breath. 

“Frankie…I know you’re capable of real violence,” you shake your head, sighing, “but you’re not a violent person, it’s like it’s getting away from you when you work with Joel and I do-” 

“Maybe I am a violent person now? This is the person I need to be now, to keep myself safe, to keep us safe!” Frankie slams his hands against the cupboard and stalks out of the kitchen, turning and gripping the back of the couch as he gets to it, looking back at you. “I do it for you, don’t you get it?! Maybe this is the person I have to be now to keep myself safe, for you, to stay alive for you because I have to keep you safe!”

“Then stay here, stay in the QZ,” you follow him towards the living room. “I don’t want you to go out any more if this is what you have to do. It’s destroying you!”

“That's all I can do!” he shouts back at you, “That’s all I’m tra-trained for, I’m the b-best at it! It’s the only thing that makes a difference!”

“Frankie, you don’t have to-” you begin, but Frankie just shakes his head and starts pacing the living room like he can’t hear you.

“E-every time I leave you make me p-promise to come back safe, did you ever stop to think that this is what I have to do to keep that promise to you?! I have to stay alive to keep you safe, I promised you that and now you think I’m a monster for what I have to do?” 

Frankie slams his hands hard against the wall and spins round, stomping across the living room again and you’re worried now, he’s spiraling out of control, his voice becoming more and more unstable. “I d-do this for you, I stay a-alive for you, don’t you get it! I would’ve fucking ki-killed myself after she died! I was so fucking close to it, so-s-so fucking close to just walking into that fucking lake and ending it! If-if it wasn’t for you still in that cabin!” His voice is rising to a shout, spinning around and slamming his fist into the wall again, “I just..I promise to come back every time, I have to come back but you still think I’m just violent, just a fucking monster, just a mo-monster, I-I can’t- “

“Frankie, c’mon man!”

You didn’t even hear the front door open but Pope suddenly walks into the living room. You’re frozen by the kitchen as Frankie paces, more and more agitated, back and forth, his arms waving in front of him as his mind whirls. You can see his glassy eyes, his breathing is starting to get erratic but you have no idea how to stop this. But Pope strides over to his friend and stands in front of him, forcing him to come to a halt. 

“Francisco, cálmate, hermano. Por favor;” he tries to catch Frankie’s eyes, gently placing his hands on his shoulders and holding on as Frankie tries to shrug them off, looking at him with almost unseeing eyes.

“Frankie…fuck…” he sighs as he scans his face, “you’re high as a fucking kite. What did you take?” 

At that Frankie’s eyes snap up to Pope’s, “Fucking nothing!” he snarls, wrenching himself away and stumbling back towards the couch. 

“Fish, I’ve seen you high more times than you can remember, I know when you’ve been using, man,” Pope says as Frankie grabs the back of the couch again, hiding his eyes beneath the bill of his cap again, refusing to look at you or Santi. 

“Frankie…” you try, your voice wobbling as you recognize the signs in him but he just shakes his head. 

“I had a few drinks with Joel, I’m not fucking high,” he mutters but Santi shakes his head. 

“C’mon, Fish, I know you’re struggling, she knows it too, we just wanna help you,” he takes a few steps towards Frankie, the frustration seeping through into his voice and Frankie backs away, turning around and going for his backpack. 

“I’m not fucking high,” he snarls over his shoulder, rifling through his backpack. 

“Fine, you’re not using,” Santi says, “then show us your pack.” He motions towards the bag at Frankie’s feet and the way Frankie reacts makes your stomach sink another notch. His hands clench instinctively around the opening, pulling it closer but Pope steps in and reaches for the bag. Frankie abruptly stands up and stumbles back, grabbing it but his movements are slow and Pope’s faster, he snatches the backpack from Frankie, holding it away from him. 

“Coño, pendejo!” Frankie snarls, trying to grab the bag back from Pope, “What the fuck are you doing?!” “What the fuck are you doing, Frankie?” Pope replies with a sneer, shoving him back and Frankie, already unsteady on his feet, stumbles backwards and falls onto the couch. “You told me yourself, never trust a fucking junkie.” 

Keeping an eye on Frankie, while you stand stunned by the kitchen door, your hands gripping the door frame so hard your fingers ache, Pope opens the backpack and digs through it. It doesn’t take him long, under Frankie’s dull eyes he soon pulls out a small baggie with white pills. Pope sighs and holds it out to Frankie. 

“What is it?” 

“Painkillers,” Frankie mumbles, but his eyes drop from Pope to his feet, his lie so obvious it forces tears into your eyes. 

“Frankie…” you whisper and he glances up at you and meets your eyes for a second before he looks away. But even in that brief glance you see the pain and guilt in his eyes and it pushes you to move, walking around the coffee table and sinking down on the couch next to him. You raise your hand to put it on his shoulder but before you touch him he’s on his feet, snatching the bag from Pope’s hand. 

“It’s fucking painkillers, ok?!” he yells, his aggression flaring up as he stumbles towards the front door.

“Catfish, for fucks sake,” Pope shouts as his patience snaps, “get your fucking shit together, man!”

“Please, Frankie, you know this is your PTSD making you spiral, we’ve been here before,” you plead with him, standing up again as he stops with his back to you and the room. But whatever is in his system has control of him now as he shakes his head, his fingers twitching around the small baggie in his hand. Neither of you are getting through to him now, his body language closed off, even with his back turned you see the walls go up. But still, you go up to him where he stands by the door. His chin is on his chest, his shoulders up by his ears, you can feel the tension rolling off him as he fights whatever demon is in his mind. Gently you put your hand on his arm, and he trembles under your touch, giving the smallest shake of his head. 

“Frankie…” you whisper, “please, stay with me, we’ve done this before, we can do it again, I love you.” 

He shudders, a long held breath rushes out of him and he shakes his head again. 

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles, “I love you, I’m sorry.” He pushes open the door and his arm slips from under your hand. You hear him run down the stairs and Santi comes up behind him, he’s got his coat on. 

“I’ll follow him, I won’t let him get into more trouble, I’ll get him back,” he gives you a quick squeeze and hurries after Frankie. 

…

Frankie rushes through the streets, the bag of oxy burning a hole in his pocket. He has no plan for where to go, he left his coat back at the apartment and the cold March air is making him shiver. Picking up his pace he turns at random, down a street, and then another, losing himself in the narrow alleys of North End, but it doesn’t surprise him when he finds himself in front of Joel’s apartment building, a dirty red brick block. It makes sense; to end up here. He pushes the door open and stumbles up the stairs.

Joel’s slow to answer his front door, Frankie’s almost given up, prepared to sit and wait by the door, when the older man finally opens up and looks him up and down. “Hey Frankie, what’s up? You’ve got no jacket on.” 

“I ran out on it, left in a hurry,” Frankie mumbles in reply, his mind is still foggy, he can’t quite focus on Joel. “I got some of your supply on me, Pope found it in my bag.”

“Ah, bet he wasn’t too happy about that,” Joel says, waving Frankie inside. “He ain’t too happy about me wanting to trade what we got up in Concord.” He closes the door and motions to the couch and Frankie slumps down on it as Joel goes to the kitchen and pulls out two glasses and a bottle. 

“Give me one of those too,” Joel motions to Frankie’s pocket and sits down at the other end of the couch. Frankie pulls out the baggie and pour out the pills on the coffee table, handing one to Joel, taking another one for himself and they both down it with the whiskey. 

Joel’s not one for talking much and Frankie’s grateful, he just needs a place to forget everything for a while. And for a long time both men sit at opposite sides of the couch, lost in their own minds as the chemicals take over. Frankie tilts his head back, his eye following the cracks in the ceiling until they slip closed and he just feels himself breathing, finally peace takes over in his mind as the fog settles. 

Joel slips in another pill and another few large mouthfuls of the liquor, leaning back against the back of the couch and rubbing his eyes with his hand. 

“You lost your daughter,” he says, almost surprising himself when the words come out. 

Frankie doesn’t move, his eyes closed, “Yeah,” he squeezes his eyes shut, little sparks of red and yellow blossoming behind his eyelids, but he sees something else in his mind. 

He tilts his head forward, opening his eyes and focusing on his hands, “Yeah,” he says again, rubbing his thumb over the fleshy part of his hand, he can almost see the blood on it. “I did, right at the beginning.” 

“She got infected?” 

Frankie balks at the question, the image of his little girl, mycelium under her skin, flashes up in his mind. He’s seen multitudes of infected since, killed so many, seen the thin white strands wriggle towards him as they attack and die in front of him, but he never lets himself commit what they look like to memory. This one is the only one that he remembers. 

“Yeah,” he nods, “one of the first days.” 

He and Joel have never talked about this before. He never talks to anyone about Lucía or what happened to her, not even to the one person who knows what he went through in the aftermath. 

 He glances over at Joel, he’s still leaning back on the couch, his hand rubbing over his eyes. 

“D’you ever talk about Sarah?” 

“No.” The answer is fast and curt. 

Both men sit in silence for a few minutes, Joel shifts on the couch, looking over at Frankie, “Everyone’s lost someone. No one wants to hear about her.” 

“How did she die?” Frankie locks eyes with Joel, suddenly it feels important to know how Sarah died. Joel knows how Lucía died, it feels important to know how Sarah died too. Joel meets his eyes for a few beats before he drops his gaze and stares at the wall opposite. 

“It was the first night. We were trying to get away from town, ran into the military perimeter, a soldier shot at us. She…” Joel loses his words, his jaw clenching shut as he grinds his teeth, dropping his head between his shoulders. 

Frankie feels the fog swirl around his mind, letting the minutes slip by while Joel stares down at his watch. 

“I shot Lucía,” Frankie says, like a confession to Joel, to the man whose daughter was also shot. As if it makes a difference how they died. The daughters died and so did the fathers, when they failed.

The fog in his head clears slightly and behind the mist he sees the gun in his hand, aimed at his little girl, who no longer recognises him as she screeches and flails under the weight of her mother’s body. He reaches forward to the coffee table and takes two more pills, swallowing them down with the last of the whiskey in his glass, letting the fog cloud his mind again. 

Joel blinks and looks at Frankie as if he has to think about what the other man just said, “You shot her?”

“I had to, I’d seen what they were turning into. I couldn’t…” 

Joel leans forward, refilling his own glass and Frankies before he leans back, “I would’ve done the same.” 

The two men sit in silence as the fog swirls through them, making thoughts slow to appear and slow to disappear. 

“Sarah,” Frankie says, pushing a thought to the front of his hazy mind, “S-she was a great kid, L-Lucía loved her, fucking loved her. Didn’t stop talking about her for days after we got back.” 

He grips the glass and takes a sip, shaking his head, trying to remember the comforting thought he just had, it’s stuck somewhere in his chest, he can feel it. 

“I don’t…I do-don’t believe in God, I l-lost any faith I had in the army, you know. S-so many fucked up things that I saw, that I did,” he says, lifting his glass, motioning to the world outside. “I don’t believe in any god, any-anything. But I wish I did, because if Sarah d-died on that first night, that means that wherever they went, our kids, our little girls…Sarah was there waiting for Lucía. They weren’t alone,” Frankie pauses, he feels his chest constrict, that feeling like he can’t breathe threatening to overtake him. “I’d like to believe they weren’t alone,” he whispers, but in the quiet room, Joel still hears him.

Frankie slumps back down on the couch, spilling whiskey down his shirt, his burst of clarity suddenly spent, “They would’ve had each other…” 

“We failed them,” Joel says, his voice low, Frankie can hear the fog in his mind too. “We should’ve kept them safe, but all we did was stand there. Couldn’t keep ‘em safe.” 

Frankie nods, he feels his brain slowing down again, “I made so many mistakes…but she was the best mistake I made…couldn’t keep her safe,” he takes a large mouthful of the whiskey, it burns on the way down, distracting his mind for a second as he coughs. 

“I don’t talk about Sarah, not even to Tommy,” Joel says, rubbing his thumb over the rim of the glass. “ ‘S’no point, just makes me angrier, I get by better if I don’t think about her.”

Frankie slumps down deeper into the couch, curling himself around the glass in his hand, watching the whiskey swirl around as the fog in his brain follows the motions. 

“How do you stay alive,” he mumbles to the room and Joel tilts his head to look at the younger man, curled into the corner of the ratty old couch. The question is more for himself than for Joel but Joel answers anyway.

“For family,” he nods slowly, once, to himself, “for family, for Tommy. And for your woman, she kept you alive.” It’s not a question, it’s a statement and Frankie sighs. 

“She doesn’t think I should do runs any more, and she’s right, I know she’s right,” he mutters, pushing his cap off his head and rubbing his temple with his free hand, the fog is lifting again and he feels the edge of panic in his mind, but he can’t remember what he’s should panic about.  

“Why not? The drugs?” Joel motions at the dwindling pile of pills on the coffee table and Frankie grabs two of them, knocking them back with the whiskey still in his hand. 

“My head is fucked up. From the army. ‘S’gets worse sometimes, ‘s’gets worse when I do runs, when I do violent things.” Frankie sighs, “She doesn’t like it.” 

Joel snorts, a mirthless sound, “Men like us, you ‘n me, we do the violent things so others don’t have to, you keep her safe.” 

“S’what I t-told h-her,” Frankie grumbles, he can feel his head getting heavier, the fog is so thick he can’t even push his tongue through it, it’s sticking to his teeth. “I do it-do it, t-to keep he-her safe.” He sinks further into the couch, his head leaning on the back of it as he wills his hand to lift up the glass to his lips and drain it. “I-I do it t-to come b-back t-to h-er.” 

Through the fog in his own mind Joel sees Frankie tip forward, the empty glass in his hand, as he passes out. Joel’s glass clatters to the floor as he stumbles to his feet and staggers into the bedroom, falling onto the bed, passing out as his head hits the pillow. 

Chapter 31

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#frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales fanfiction #frankie morales x you #pedro pascal character fanfiction #frankie morales fanfic #the last of us #the last of us fanfiction #pedro pascal #joel miller tlou #joel miller #triple frontier fanfiction #triple frontier au #triple frontier #benjamin miller #benny miller #santiago pope garcia #frankie morales x f!reader #frankie morales x fem!reader #frankie morales angst #the last of us fandom #the last of us fanfic #pedrostories #the pilot and his girl

[hoedamn-eron]

baby, please - part 18

It's time for your 'surprise' baby shower (that Santi did not give away at all).

Warnings: Mentions of unsupportive family members. Like two swear words. Mentions of Santi being absent. Reader calls her friends 'guys', as a collective. A bit emotional but all around good vibes. Absolutely not proofread (surprise), so there will probably be mistakes. Word count: 3,802 F!Reader, no use of Y/N.

It’s come to light recently that my partner has been reading this 😂 Hi Dom!

Part 17 ● Series Masterlist ● Part 19

“We’re going to be late!”

“I know, I know, I'm coming!” you call, fixing your make up in the mirror. You double – triple – check your appearance before you leave Courtney’s bathroom.

Your friends were still under the impression you knew nothing about the baby shower, since no-one (including yourself) had ever said anything about organising one. You would have been okay with or without – but you’re secretly happy that something was arranged. You’d been looking forward to the shower since Santi had accidentally given away on Christmas day.

You’re wearing a baby blue dress (you weren’t sure if it was hinting at the gender, but you highly doubted Santi told anyone – or maybe he did…you’re not going to get into it), with a low V-neck and ruffles along the edges. At 8 months pregnant, not many things made you feel ‘pretty’ anymore; you felt like you’d eaten a watermelon. But this dress was cute, and when Beth gave it to you to wear for your ‘last hurrah lunch’, you had burst into tears at how cutely pregnant you looked.

Your hormones were still all over the place.

Andy and Courtney were waiting by the front door as you meet them, smiling shyly at Courtney. “Sorry. I’m ready to go now.”

“You look lovely,” Andy said, smiling at your, spinning his car keys in his hand. Andy was such a good guy. He reminded you a little of Benny, in the way that he was like a golden retriever. He was so willing to drop you guys off at the restaurant.

“Thank you, Andy,” you say, smiling back.

“Come on, Beth and Gabs are already there waiting for us,” Courtney said, frowning at her phone.

You follow the two to Andy’s car, sitting in the back seat before Andy drives off towards the restaurant. You’re talking about what kind of food you’re going to get, what desserts you wanted, and how you’re going to eat all you like with no judgement. You didn’t miss the grins Courtney and Andy sent to each other.

After Andy parks the car outside the restaurant, Courtney helps you out, holding your hand for steadiness. You thanked her before you all make your way into the restaurant, where you were led by a hostess through towards the back. You grinned as Courtney and Andy talked quicker, more excited, the further you made your way in.

You were glad that you hadn’t said anything about knowing of the baby shower. They were obviously so excited they had managed to pull it off.

As you were lead through some double doors, before you freeze as a loud, “SURPRISE!” overtakes your senses. Although you were expecting something, it still caught you off guard.

You look around the room with wide eyes, almost laughing. You were expecting a baby shower, sure, but not with this many people. You spotted Beth and Georgia, with Gabrielle and Matthew, smiling widely by the front. Then you spotted Emily from work, with Harriet, who looked like she wanted to be anywhere but here. Then you spotted Santi with Frankie and Sarah, and Benny was with Will and Claire (Benny, in true Benny fashion, was the loudest and held his arms out wide, a big smile on his face).

There were typical baby decorations – balloons in the shape of pacifiers, pink and blue banners around the room, tables covered in matching pink and blue tablecloths – and the tables were filled with all sorts of food (you did not miss the large bowl of Sourpatch watermelon pieces). The central table was laden with tempting treats, and cupcakes with pastel-coloured frosting, and a tiered cake adorned with baby booties, and an assortment of finger foods invite everyone to indulge in the celebration. There was a pile of gifts towards the back of the room, and piles and piles of diapers. Everyone must have spent a fortune.

You look at everyone before laughing. “There’s so many people here.”

“Did we surprise you?” Courtney asked excitedly.

You give a quick glance to Santi before nodding. “Yes, you did. I had no idea!”

“Liar,” joked Beth, as she gave you a hug. “But thanks for letting us think that you didn’t know.”

“In my defence, I only found out two weeks ago, so you did fairly well until then.”

“Santiago can’t keep a secret for shit,” muttered Courtney, giving him a glare at said man, who was chatting away to Frankie and Benny, laughing at something Benny said.

“How did you even pull all of this off?” you ask, looking around at everything.

“Benny and I came up with it at the Halloween party!” said Gabrielle, smiling widely. “We exchanged numbers and we’ve all been in cahoots trying to get it organised.”

“I cannot believe you didn’t tell me it was Santiago who was your baby daddy!”

You cringe as you turn to Emily, who was stood with a flute of champagne in her hand, Harriet at her side, texting on her phone, her own champagne flute in her hand. “Surprise?”

“Oh, oh! ‘Surprise’!” said Emily, scoffing and rolling her eyes. “I am shocked! Betrayed – “

“Did you not do the math to figure it out?” you ask, grinning.

Emily goes quiet and stares at you before she suddenly burst into tears. “I can’t believe that I’m the one who set you guys up!”

She pulls you into a hug, and you awkwardly pat her on the back at you give your friends a wide-eyed look. “There, there,” you say.

“Let her go, Emily, she needs to mingle,” muttered Harriet. She finally put her phone away and gives you a tight smile as Emily lets you go, wiping her eyes before Gabrielle tends to her. “Congratulations, again.”

“Thank you,” you say. “I know you’re busy, you don’t have to stay – “

“Yeah, I’m meeting with the big bosses, so I’ll have to dash, but thanks again for the invite,” Harriet said quickly, placing her glass on a table. “Just thought I’d show my face. I’ll see you on Monday.”

She was gone before you could blink.

“What a…fun person,” said Beth, raising her eyebrows at you.

You roll your eyes. “She’s always like that.” You say, before smiling. “So what’s first?”

“First,” Gabrielle says, shoving a glass of Diet Coke in your hands. “Is that you sit down and let all of us tell you how amazing you are.”

“Then,” said Beth, leading you over to a cutely decorated table, sitting you down. “We’ll play some games, the really cheesy stuff. Like guess the weight of the babies, guess the length of the bump, all that stuff. Including prizes, which you are exempt from since you have an advantage.”

“Being pregnant?”

“Being pregnant.”

“Then some lunch,” said Courtney, grinning. “Then presents.”

“Always the best part of any occasion,” you joke, sipping your drink.

You sat with your friends, Sarah and Claire soon joining you and introducing themselves to Beth, Georgia, Courtney, and Emily. They blend in with the group with ease, and soon you’re laughing and joking together like you’ve been friends for years. Sarah tells them all that she never thought Santiago would ever have kids or stick around for anyone.

“It’s nearly been a year since he’s come back,” said Sarah. “He usually bolts by month one or two. Santiago Garcia can’t stay in one place for too long.”

You ignore the way the panic blossoms in your chest and disappears just as quickly as it reared its ugly head. She was only joking; Santiago has made it abundantly clear that he wasn’t going anywhere. You were weeks away from giving birth and he was still here, still celebrating with you and your friends. You’d finally agreed on names, after spending months and months disagreeing with every name you threw at each other. However, you were not quite ready to share with the world just yet, wanting to keep them to yourself until your babies finally arrived.

You gave a soft smile as Sarah still talked. No, Santi wasn’t leaving. He was here for good.

“You bad mouthing me?” Santi suddenly asked, appearing at your side as he throws a teasing grin to Sarah.

“Oh please, your attack dog will have something to say about it if I dare say a bad thing about you,” Sarah says, rolling her eyes good naturedly as she nods at Frankie, who was still talking to Benny.

“You gotta talk me up, Morales, these guys are important,” Santi replied, laughing as he motioned to your friends.

You reach over to pat his arm and give him a mock sympathetic look as Sarah teased him, before you turn to your friends. “Shall we play some games then?”

Gabrielle grins widely as Courtney nods.

Courtney calls everyone over to the table, before producing a ball of yarn. “We’re going to guess how big your bump is by measuring a string.”

“Santiago, you’re immediately disqualified, you probably have the bump mapped out,” said Beth, causing everyone to laugh.

You laugh along with them, but you realise something. Santi has never actually…touched your bump. Or if he had, it’s been a while since. You frown a little at the thought. When was the last time? Didn’t dad’s usually want to feel their kids moving? You think back and the only time you can remember was when you called him frantically because you had felt their first kicks and he wasn’t there. He’d come rushing over and you were both say in silence for what felt like hours with his hands on your belly as you both waited for it to happen again. That was months ago. What did that mean? Did he feel awkward doing it again? You were good friends, and you were pregnant with his kids, you wouldn’t have a problem with him wanting to feel the bump whenever he wanted.

You were looking into this too hard. Maybe has was just respecting your boundaries, that you don’t want to always be touched. Maybe you should let him know that he’s okay to do it. Not now, but later.

Courtney went around the group, letting everyone estimate how your bump measured. When it was Matthew’s turn, he looked between you and Gabrielle before he asked his wife, “How big were you with Luna?”

You wince at the question, and you noticed a few other people pull a face. Gabrielle had some self-esteem issues when she was pregnant with Luna, which was a different pregnancy with Theodore.

Gabrielle just gives him a tight smile. “Not as big as someone with twins, thank you very much. No offence.”

You shake your head. “None taken.”

Matthew, shaking his head, measured out a piece of string, looking at you a few times before finally cutting it.

Courtney makes her way around the group, where everyone made their measurements. Benny got into a spat with Frankie about how big his string was, before making one much bigger than Frankie’s.

“Hey!” you cried at Benny. “That’s offensive!”

“There’s two in there!” he cried, pointing to your bump, and holding up his string. “And I know that Garcia’s make big babies! Pope was eleven pounds when he was born!”

Your eyes widened as you look back at Santi. “You never told me that.”

He merely smirked at you.

“Would have been nice to know before I got pregnant.”

“Wasn’t intending to get you pregnant, didn’t think it was worth mentioning.”

You pull a face before nodding. “Okay, fair. Anyway, twins are usually smaller than average, so you might be off, Benny.”

“Damn,” Benny muttered as he passed the string over to Will and Claire.

Benny, in fact, ends up winning the string game.

“Are you kidding!?” you cry, mouth hanging open as Emily measures your bump with Benny’s perfect string.

Benny, with his arms raised and hands curled into fists in celebration, parades around the room like a peacock. Frankie and Will throw over some friendly insults as he picks a prize (oddly, he chose a cute little succulent).

The games continue with baby shower bingo, adding an element of friendly competition to the atmosphere. A Gabrielle shouted the words on the bingo cards, you enjoy joining in, getting competitive with Courtney, trying to shove her card away whenever she was searching for a word, only for her to keep stamping the wrong words on your own card. You glance at Santi who wasn’t taking too much of a part of this game, choosing to talk intensely with Frankie and Will, Benny playing bingo with Claire and Sarah. You frown lightly at him with worry before turning back to the game before Claire lets out a cry of joy, and calls out, "Bingo!"

She won a Lush voucher, which she was very happy about.

Next, Claire arranged a table with an array of dolls laid out, and a row of diapers, baby wipes, and baby talc. Gabrielle took lead on this one also, explaining that the dolls needed changing, and you had to use all the tools on the table. The one with the quickest time won.

You didn’t take part, claiming you’d be changing diapers for what felt like the rest of time when the babies arrived, so you sat back and watched in amusement as the chaos began. You were crying laughing everyone frantically tried to change the doll’s diapers; there was a suspiciously odd number of resources available, which meant a few people were scrambling and shouting at each other for cheating and hogging the wipes, or the talc. You were sure Santi and Benny were about to wrestle on the floor.

In the end, Will won, but graciously gave his prize of the collection of Hershey’s chocolate to Emily, who’d had her eye on it the moment she walked into the venue.

After Beth announced a small break for some lunch, you mosey your way on over to Santi, who finally had a moment alone. “Hi,” you say as you take a seat next to him.

“Hi,” he said, grinning back at you.

“How you doing?”

He gives a short snort of laughter, taking a sip of his water. “I’m doing good.”

“Good,” you say, nodding. “Saw you and Frankie and Will talking earlier. You were a bit...off, is everything okay?”

Santi frowned at you for a small moment, so brief you almost miss it, before shaking his head. “Everything’s fine.”

You raise your eyebrows at him pointedly. “You sure?”

He nodded, placing his drink back on the table. “Yeah.”

“If you say so,” you say.

You drop it. You can tell something is bothering him, but you’re sure he’ll tell you when he’s ready. You look around the room, smiling at all your friends mingling, Benny talking to Matthew and Gabrielle (or at least listening to something Matthew was talking about), Frankie and Sarah were chatting with Beth and Georgia, and Courtney was talking with Claire and helping set up the next activity (from what you could see, it looked like onesie decorating), as Andy and Will were getting some more drinks.

“So how do you find my friends?” you ask him.

Santi gives a chuckle before looking at you, grinning. “Beth scares the shit out of me.”

You laugh. “She’s an angel, what do you mean?”

“She’s very protective over you,” he says.

“She’s protective of anyone she loves. You’re the same,” you say, waving over to his friends. “You’d take a bullet for any of them. You probably have taken a bullet for them.”

“One or two,” Santi quips, sipping again at his drink.

“Exactly,” you say, nudging his shoulder with yours.

He stays silent for a moment before he takes a breath and places his drink back on the table. “I know we’re doing gifts later, but I wanted to give you this now.”

He digs around in his pocket, pulling out a small, wrapped box. He hands it to you, and you take it after a moment before unwrapping it. You pause as you look at the small white box, before giving a wide smile at Santiago and opening it. You give a giggle at the new charm for your bracelet, a baby carriage.

“To commemorate your baby shower,” Santi says.

“Our baby shower,” you say, before lifting the charm gently. “Put it on, put it on!”

You hold it out to Santi before offering your wrist, where the bracelet he gave you for Christmas still lay. You hardly take it off. He smiles as he holds your arm gently, moving it so he could place the charm on. He makes sure it’s secure before giving your hand a small pat, and you bring your wrist to your eyes to get a good look at it.

“It’s beautiful,” you say. “Thank you, Santi. It’s an amazing addition.”

“I’m glad you like it.” He gives you another smile before glancing around the room. “Let’s get some food. I’m starving.”

After lunch, you sit with your friends and start decorating some onesies. You attempt to stick to a jungle theme, to match Santi’s nursery (from what you could tell). You laugh at your poor attempt of a tiger and panda that you tried to draw on the onesies, and you and Emily try to fix it with some patterns and some more colour, but you eventually decided it was a lost cause, that they were as good as they were going to get.

You decided you were going to pack them in your hospital bag.

Throughout the rest of the celebration, snippets of conversation, shared memories, and well-wishes fill the air. Gabrielle and Matthew swap parenting tips and recount their own experiences with you, Santi, and Frankie and Sarah, leaving you with some laughs and new worries, which you would be able to conquer with the love and support from everyone.

You open your presents with excitement, oohing and ahhing at the new clothes, the crib sheets, even down to teething toys and pacifiers. You thanked everyone profusely, sharing some smiles with Santi. You were already picturing the presents scattered around your new house, where you would store them away when they weren’t being used, where all the small, teeny-tiny clothes were going to go.

You might start crying.

More games are played, and more prizes are won between the group, and you pack away a stack of cards with baby predictions on them. You giggle to yourself as you read through some of them.

Soon after, you realise the day is ending and the venue had been subtly hinting for a while that they were ready to close. You start loading the car with the gifts and many, many packs of diapers, with the help of your friends, old and new. You hover outside the venue once everyone starts to disperse, sending goodbyes and sharing hugs.

“We’ll help you get settled into your new place over the next week, yeah?” Frankie asked you, placing his hands on his hips as you came out of a hug with Sarah.

You nod at him. “Yes, please, I would really appreciate it. The house could do with a fresh coat of paint, and I still need to build all of my furniture – “

“Don’t worry about all’a that, we’ve got it,” said Santi, looking at you with a slight frown.

Benny nodded, grinning. “Just let us know when.”

You smile widely before nodding. “Thanks again for today, really.”

“We’ll see you soon, okay?” said Sarah, giving you a pointed look. “Don’t be a stranger.”

“I won’t,” you say, before you watch them walk to their cars. You waved them off, watching them leave before sighing and turning to Santi. “So I’ll see you next week, yeah?”

He nods, arms folded over his chest. “Yup, I’ll take a few half days. You started maternity yet?”

You shake your head. “Nope, week after next. But I’m using some PTO so I don’t have to use all of my maternity leave.”

“Smart,” he says, grinning before turning to Emily, who just joined you after going to the bathroom. “Ready to go?”

“Sure,” Emily replied before giving you a hug, smiling widely. “Today was so much fun. I am still amazed that Santiago is the baby daddy we’ve been talking about.”

“Thanks for coming, Em,” you say, coming out of the hug. “Next time I see you, I’ll probably be a mom.”

“I know! It’s crazy!” she cried, before looking at Santi. “Let’s go.”

“I’ll see you later, cariño,” said Santi, bringing you into a hug before pecking you on the cheek.

You ignore the way your skin tingles afterward. “See you later.”

You both linger for a moment before coming out of the hug. You look at him and he’s already meeting your gaze, a soft smile on his face before he gives you a nod and turns to leave with Emily.

You wave as they hop in the truck and drive away before sighing, and once they were out of view, you turn back and walk into the venue, grabbing the last few gifts and thanking the staff again for being so accommodating, before you stop at Courtney’s car, where you friends are already gathered.

“Thanks for this guys, really,” you say, smiling at them as you load the last diaper pack into Courtney’s trunk. “I really enjoyed it today.”

“I’m glad you did,” said Gabrielle.

“I’m just sorry it was…” Beth says, before trailing off.

“What?” you ask after a moment.

Beth gives a sigh before looking at you. “I’m sorry that your family couldn’t celebrate this with you. I tried to contact them, but…”

You heart skips a beat at the mention of your family. Tears spring to your eyes as you try and wave it off nonchalantly. “Don’t feel bad.”

“No, Beth’s right, they should be here – “ said Courtney.

But you shake your head, cutting her off. “No, no, they’ve made their choice. Besides, I have all I need right here.”

There was a moment before your friends gather you in their arms, the tears finally falling from your eyes. You feel safe, warm, and valued. The baby shower showed that you were surrounded by love and laughter, despite the absence of your family. The memories created on this special day will forever be etched in your heart, a testament to the incredible support and love from your chosen family, and you couldn’t wait to share this journey with your children.

“We love you,” Gabrielle muttered into the group hug.

You give a small, watery laugh. “I love you guys too.”

You all came out of the hug, before subtly wiping at your eyes. Courtney sighed before closing her trunk. “We taking all of this to your new house?”

You nod. “Yup. My next adventure begins!”

Tagged - @khonsulockley, @superficialfeelings, @othersideoftheparadise, @beezusvreeland, @itsmytimetoodream

#triple frontier #santiago garcia x reader #santiago x reader #santiago garcia #oscar isaac #pregnant!reader #santiago garcia x f!reader #frankie morales #william miller #benny miller

[theewokingdead]

F My...Tonsils? - Benny Miller x wife!Reader

Pairing: Benny Miller x wife!Reader (1st Person POV; Benergy Universe) Summary: Benny is attractive despite the ridiculous things that come out of his mouth. Word Count: 600+ Rating: No rating but my blog is 18+ Warnings: 1st person POV, Language, Allusions to oral Notes: Things were changed, but this was inspired by a legitimate exchange between me and my husband. As always, Benergy is a collection of one-shots so this can be read without having read anything else.

Main Masterlist | Benergy Series Masterlist

“Boom!” Benny leaps to his feet as he slams his last Uno card onto the table. “Suck my dick!” He gestures to the area in case I’ve forgotten where his dick resides, despite the fact that the two children sleeping above should make it clear I know.

Typical Benny.

I pretend to be annoyed, rolling my eyes while I gather the pile of cards, seeming to ignore the fact that he’s now strutting around the dining room like a peacock showing off his plumage. Secretly, I watch him out of the corner of my eye, trying to hide the smile that's creeping up on my face as I realize how much I enjoy his playful antics.

“You wish,” I mumble. I shuffle the deck, waiting for him to settle down to see if he wants to continue or call it a night. We've been playing games for hours while eating snacks, chatting, and joking around – our little date night with kids when we don't have a sitter. It's not always easy balancing parenthood and romance, but nights like these make it all worth it. We share many laughs, teasing and taunting each other, just having fun and enjoying each other’s company.

“No, you wish,” Benny retorts, and I raise an eyebrow in response, curious as to where he’s going to take this conversation. He places his hands on the table and leans forward, a mischievous glint in his eye. “You wish I was touching your tonsils right now.”

My face twists in shock, unable to believe he just said that. I don’t know if I’m more stunned by his words or the fact he thinks it’s even possible.

Fuck…why is the thought of that so hot? Benny deep in my throat…chocking on his-

I try to compose myself and respond, “You know I don’t have tonsils, right?” But deep down, I can feel my cheeks burning and my heart racing. As much as I try to deny it, there's something about Benny that I can never resist. Maybe it's his sense of humor or his confidence, but I find myself drawn to him more and more each day.  

Benny isn’t thrown off by my response. He simply smirks and says, “That’s how deep I’d be. I’d touch the ghost of your tonsils.”

Jesus Christ. I can’t help but pinch the bridge of my nose and, for a moment, reconsider all of my life choices. My mind races with conflicting thoughts and emotions. Part of me thinks he is such an idiot while another part of me is so incredibly turned on by him.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Before I can fully process my thoughts, Benny walks to where I’m sitting, tips my chin up, and kisses me, sending a rush of desire through my body. I melt into the kiss, my hands finding their way to the back of his neck as I pull him closer. It's like every nerve in my body is on fire, and I can't get enough of him. But as quickly as the kiss started, it ends, and Benny pulls away with a smirk on his face.

“I knew you couldn't resist me," he says, his blue eyes sparkling with amusement.

Once more, I roll my eyes, trying to hide the fact that he’s right.

“You're insufferable,” I reply, but there's a hint of laughter in my voice. I rise from my chair and push past him, heading toward the stairs that lead to our bedroom.

“Where are you going?” he questions, and I feel his gaze following me.

“Upstairs to perform a séance to see if the ghosts of my tonsils want to get fucked tonight.” I stop and turn to look down at him, seeing that he hasn't moved. "You coming or not?"

#benny miller #benny miller x you #benny miller fanfic #benny miller x reader #benny miller x f!reader #benny miller fanfiction #garrett hedlund #garrett hedlund x reader #garrett hedlund fanfiction #garrett hedlund characters #triple frontier #triple frontier fanfic #triple frontier fanfiction #triple frontier fan fiction #triple frontier fic #benergy #catie writes

[foli-vora]

day 9: praise kink - benny miller.

warnings: f!reader. 18+ ONLY. praise kink, oral sex (f rec), somewhat of a sub!ben

a/n: 735 words. sunshine boi absolutely thrives off praise. enjoy! x

"Goddamn fuckin' jeans... I've been thinkin' about this all fuckin' day," he mutters, tugging impatiently at your pants and tearing the denim down your legs.

They disappear somewhere behind him and he dives forward, barely stopping to make himself comfortable on his stomach before pressing a hot open mouthed kiss to your covered pussy and putting a quick stop to your giggles, the breath freezing in your lungs as the heat of his breath melts through the fabric.

He doesn't bother taking your underwear off, instead choosing to just curl a finger around the leg band and simply pull the thin material out of his way.

You don't get a warning, a chance to brace...

His tongue dives between your folds, hungry and unforgiving, dipping low to teasingly trace over your entrance before moving back up to circle your clit, his broad shoulders stopping the automatic twitch of your thighs attempting to close from the sudden stimulation.

"Jesus Ben," you pant, a hand flying to tangle in his hat flattened locks as his tongue rubs frenzied strokes over the swollen nerve.

You don't know if you're trying to pull him closer or push him away, but you hold onto him nevertheless, riding the overwhelming waves of pleasure as he loses himself against you.

He clings to you, needy and desperate, thick fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thigh in an attempt to anchor himself to you. The heat of his mouth and the feverous way he all but devours you borders on the brink of too fucking much and you push weakly at his forehead, squirming under his hold.

"Benny, baby boy, slow down for me... fu—ck... yes, just like that—"

A groan reverberates against your pussy and you jolt at the feeling, eyes falling down to see where he lays between your spread legs.

His brows are pinched together in focus, his thick lashes brushing along the sun kissed skin of his cheeks as he all but ravages you. You trace the faint spattering of freckles with a warm flood of fondness.

"Look at you," you murmur softly, brushing your fingers along his forehead and sweeping the stray locks of hair falling over his face away. "You're so pretty, baby—my pretty boy."

You catch the way he shifts at your words, the crease between his brows momentarily getting deeper as he moves down to push his tongue into your cunt, lapping hungrily away at the arousal building there.

"You like that, don't you, honey?" You whisper, raking your nails along his scalp as you push his hair back, hips subconsciously grinding against his face as his tongue pushes to taste you deeper.

"You like knowing you're my pretty boy? You like knowing how crazy you drive me like this? You're so fucking good at this, baby."

He jerks at your words, briefly grinding down into the mattress with a low, tangled groan. His tongue probes your walls, curling and dragging along the soft flesh before making his way back to your clit, wrapping his plush lips around the swollen nerve and sucking at it softly.

"Fuck, yes... just like that. You gonna make me come, sweet thing?"

He makes a low noise of affirmation, pushing himself impossibly closer and tightening his hold. The pressure on your clit has the heat churning in your core, running along your nerves in electric waves and tensing each muscle along your frame with the promise of release.

"Yeah?" You breathe, relaxing into the mattress as your own eyes flutter shut, losing yourself to the way his mouth works at you. "Keep going baby, just like that—feels so fucking good... fuck, Ben—"

He holds you as you hit that peak and tip over the edge, cumming with a breathless cry and arching away from the mattress as the white hot ecstasy consumes your system.

You ride it out, jerking and grinding against his mouth. He groans when the taste of your cum floods his tongue and pushes it deep into your cunt, feeling the flutter of muscle and fighting a grin when you start to babble his name, drowning in overstimulation.

Finally, he breaks away and rests his head on your thigh, blinking up at you with a soft, relaxed gaze. He grins, boyish and charming, when you eventually blink away your post-orgasm haze and meet his eyes.

His tongue slides along his lower lip, "Round two?"

-

Reminder: taglists will not be used for kinktober. I’m tagging every fic with #foliskink22 if you want to follow along for the ride!

#foliskink22 #benny miller x reader #benny miller x f!reader #benny miller x you #benny miller imagine #triple frontier fic

[pedropascalsx]

The Fall Out; The Invitation.

Frankie Morales x F!Reader. 

Summary: You attend an audition for a local band, and all seemingly goes well until it doesn’t.

Warnings: P in V sex, Creampie, Swearing, Some angst, Arguing, Asshole Frankie and Drummer!Benny Miller.

Word Count: 2K.

Chapters: 1 of 6.

A/N: I don’t know what I am doing. I am bad at this. This is mostly flashbacks and throughout the series I will be jumping back and forth. The next chapter will heavily focus on the breakdown of the band/relationships.

[FLASHBACK: TEN YEARS EARLIER].

It was fucking intoxicating, it was four months of unspoken tension and frustrations being hashed out in the most bruising and salacious way. 

Every thrust was fuelled by a different desire, a desire to make you scream his name, a desire to make you his and a desire to stop your smart mouth from spilling anything but moans of pleasure and desperate whimpers of his name. 

His grip was bruising from the very second the tension snapped, he spun you around and pulled down your panties without stopping for breath. He made a snarky comment about how fucking desperate you were for him and the way your thighs were glistening with your wetness meant that for once you couldn’t shut him up with a snide remark of your own. 

Instead you just choked back a moan, ignoring the sharp sting of pain you felt as you sunk your teeth into your bottom lip at a futile attempt to hide the overwhelming feeling of relief that it was finally happening.

He sunk himself into you in one fluid movement and you swore you could see stars. Everything around you disappeared and for a moment you were somewhere else, you weren't in a filthy dressing room at the back of some shady venue that hadn’t seen a vacuum in god knows how long.

And then he spoke. 

“You think I can’t see what you’re doing,” he scolded before ceasing his movements, “Stop biting your lip. I wanna hear how well you take my cock. I can already feel it, so what’s the point in trying to pretend that you’re not fucking gagging for it?” 

The groan that was milliseconds from spilling over your lips was replaced by a moan that you had no chance of suppressing, his cock having speared into that spot inside of you as your lips had parted. 

And from that moment on, you were putty in his hands. All the need to defy him had evaporated and the only thing that you could feel was a stronger need to be consumed by him, to feel the heat of him enveloping you as he relentlessly fucked into you. 

You gave him everything he wanted, you came with a gasp of his name and you let him spill every drop of spend inside of you as he murmured some almost incoherent speech about how you were his and he was going to claim you in every single way.

It was always going to end in tears.

[THE BEGINNING]

“Can I add this to your notice board?” A voice boomed out from across the cafe, as you served a customer their overpriced coffee. 

“Sure,” you replied with a friendly shrug, “Spare pins are placed in the bottom left corner of the board.” 

“Thanks, babe,” the voice called back and before you could get a real glance at him, he was out the door and on his way to cover every spare post or board with copies of the same flyer.

The rest of the day had been so busy you didn’t even think of it again until you were heading out, the hastily made flyer grabbing your attention as you slung your backpack across your shoulder.

You pulled it off the board and studied it for a few moments before shoving it in your backpack, it has been a while since you’d even considered performing in front of people, work and bills getting in the way of the dream you’d had since you were a child, but something about this was calling out to you. 

[THE DAY OF THE AUDITION]

Work was as busy as ever, you had been starting work at four am rather than six because the festive period had seen more visitors popping in before or after doing their Christmas shopping. 

And that had seen the pastries, cakes, tarts and cookies you made for the business selling out quicker than you were used to. 

Work was a helpful distraction, the amount of things you had to freshly bake and prepare meant you didn’t have time to fret or sike yourself out over the audition.

And before you knew it the café was open and filled with hungry and thirsty customers; and your co-worker Callie was bouncing behind the counter to relieve you of your duties. 

“Are you ready for the big audition for the big gig?” she asked with a signature wink, “You’re gonna smash it.” 

“Ooh, the big gig?” you said with a giggle, “Is that what we are calling me potentially hanging out in someone’s garage a couple of times a week?”

“Sounds like superstardom to me,” Callie shot back as she tied her apron around her waist, “Good luck, break a leg or whatever!”

“Yeah, yeah! Thank you babe.”

“Don’t forget to text me how it goes,” she called back as you politely weaved your way past the waiting customers. 

The line of people outside the venue made your nerves tingle, you weren't sure what to expect or just how many people would be interesting but it certainly wasn’t this. There must have been 25 people ahead of you, and that was just waiting outside. 

Instinctively your fingers intertwined with the fingers on your other hand, as you eagerly waited your turn, occasionally fighting the urge to abandon ship and wait for another opportunity to come around.

But the snotty girl in front of you said something to someone else in the queue that made you stand your ground, the anticipation and intrigue outweighing the anxiety and doubt.

She was eavesdropping the conversation in front of her and the sharp scoff she exhaled in judgement immediately caught your attention, “Didn’t you hear? They asked the original lead singer to leave. This is a big fucking deal, they were offered an opening slot that would have been huge for them and he pissed someone off so badly that they withdrew the offer.” 

“Who were they going to open for?” a voice that sounded alarmingly like your own croaked out and the mean girl spun around with a raised eyebrow before looking you up and down and scoffing again. 

“Green Day.”

‘Shit.’ You murmured, and she turned back around before making some unintelligible comment under her breath that made you roll your eyes.

After three agonising hours, it was almost your turn. The pink haired mean girl from the line came crashing out of the room with a smug look splashed across her face and just as you’d made the decision to go home, the door opened again and the same guy from the café was inviting you.

“Hey!” he said with a huge smile, “From the café on main right?” 

“Yeah,” you replied with a shy smile, “It’s nice to meet you.” 

“Come meet the guys,” he said as he ushered you in the room, “I’m Benny by the way. Drums!” 

“Oh, yeah, it figures you’re a drummer,” you reply with a laugh before introducing yourself. 

“Why’s that?” Benny says as he gestures to the microphone before climbing back on stage and calling out, “Because the drummers are always the most handsome guy in the band?”

“Something like that,” you roll your eyes and shrug and simply reply, “Your arms.” 

He laughs before telling the guys your name and telling them where you work and then he introduces them all.

“Okay, so we got Pope over there on bass, my brother Will is on keyboard, I’m obviously on drums and this is Frankie our guitarist.”

As he introduced each guy they waved and smiled from behind their instruments, all until Frankie. Who barely glanced up at you. Too busy fiddling with his instrument to give you the time of day, boredom and frustration clearly painted across his face. 

His incredibly handsome face. You hated how obvious it must have been that you did a double take when you looked at him, your breath hitching as you took him in. You couldn’t ignore his strong nose and jaw and his endearing scruffy patchy beard. He was gorgeous. But he seemed so utterly disinterested that he immediately struck a nerve. 

“So what are you going to sing?” Pope called out from the stage, “You want us to play something or do you have a backing track?”

“Shit,” you hissed, “No I didn’t bring one. I just figured I’d sing it without… is that ok?”

“All good, babe,” Benny yelled back with a reassuring smile, “Whenever you’re ready.” 

Run by Snow Patrol had been the song you ultimately settled on singing for the audition, it had been a firm favourite for years and was always something you felt comfortable performing.

“Holy shit,” Benny spluttered as you finished the song, “Café girl has got some pipes.” 

“That she does,” Will replied with an approving nod.

And before you had a chance to thank them a gravelly voice flooded the room, “She’s not exactly what we’re looking for,” he said as his fingers still fiddled with his guitar, “I mean, yeah, nice voice, but come on.”

“And what exactly are you looking for?” you blurted back, “Another arrogant asshole that’ll blow any more chances that may come your way.”

He sneered at you, before standing up and giving you an obvious once over, “Yeah, she’s…uh, real nice. Clearly she would make a great addition to the band” he spat out to his band mates every word dripping with sarcasm before slipping through a door off the stage.

You couldn’t make sense of how quickly he had gotten under your skin, and immediately you were trying to work out if you wanted to slap or kiss him. Slap him. Definitely slap him… Maybe. 

“Is that good for you?” the voice called out from the stage as you tried to regain some focus.

“What?” you stammered, “Uh, sorry, I didn’t catch what you said?”

Will laughed, “He has that effect on people. Could you leave your number on the sheet over there and we will let you know in a few days.” 

You nodded politely before giving the band an unconvincing smile, before stumbling over and scribbling down your name and number on the sheet. 

‘Well, I definitely won’t be hearing from them.’ you thought to yourself as you slowly walked home, replaying it all back over and over until you felt physically sick.

You sipped the hot chocolate in your mug as some absolutely awful but equally captivating hallmark movie played out on your TV, each scene as predictable as the next making you roll your eyes but somehow still being so alluring that you audibly tutted when your phone started ringing and disturbing it.

UNKNOWN NUMBER.

“Hello,” you sighed into your cell phone, “If this is a spam just do me a favour and hang up for me.” 

“Depends on what you’d refer to as spam, Café girl,” the voice boomed back into your eye with a laugh, “Not disturbing anything important I hope.” 

“Benny?” you asked with an obvious tone of surprise, “I didn’t expect to actually hear from you.” 

“Can hardly offer you the position if I don’t contact you, babe,” he says and you can picture the cocky grin on his face, “What are you doing Tuesday night?” 

Joining a local band with a guitarist that you’ve already had a spat with? ‘What could possibly go wrong?’ you thought to yourself before answering.

“Sounds like you’re about to tell me.”

[PRESENT DAY; TEN YEARS LATER]

The chill in the air made you grip the mug of hot chocolate in your hand a little tighter, you sat comfortably on the balcony off your bedroom and looked out over the lake whilst enjoying the same silence you had for years.

The rude unexpected ringing of your phone making you wince slightly as you glanced down at the screen.

UNKNOWN NUMBER.

Usually you’d just let it ring out, maybe check the voicemail they’d potentially leave a few hours later if you felt like it, but a feeling you hadn’t felt for many years started to bubble up in your stomach, and something was calling out for you to answer.

“Hello,” you quietly murmured into the phone.

“Hello, babe,” a familiar voice boomed back at you, “It’s been a while. What are you doing next month?” 

#frankie morales #Triple Frontier #triple frontier fic #triple frontier fanfiction #triple frontier au #benny miller #santiago pope garcia #pope #santi garcia #santiago garcia #will miller #will ironhead miller #francisco morales #frankie catfish morales #francisco catfish morales #frankie morales smut #frankie morales x you #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales x f!reader #Frankie Morales x OFC #my fanfiction #the fall out #the fall out fic

[theunbearableweightofpedropascal]

You again?!

Warnings: Smut 18+, p in v, oral sex, fingering, self-indulgent filth.

A/N: This is set when they go back to get the rest of the money. It's something about Benny I cannot stop writing for this man.

Summary: You keep running into the guy you had sex with in an airport bathroom.

Word Count: 4k

Of all the trips you’ve taken it has been with a friend group or family, this would be the first time you venture off on your own. You always wanted to visit Colombia. The forests were so beautiful and you heard the nightlife wasn’t so bad either. 

Making your way through the airport without anyone else to help guide you was nerve wracking but once you calmed down you realized you could ask any of the employees. Even though you were traveling to one of the hottest countries, you still opted to wear leggings and a hoodie. 

You realized soon enough that maybe you had left a little too early since the lines for TSA were quick. Sitting at your terminal with at least 2 hours until you board and nothing to do you grab your backpack and look around. Upon looking at the sign that shows where which terminals are you see they have a bar not too far away. 

You grab a seat up at the bar and place your bag behind you, looking around you see a few other lone travelers and one group of men. Once you put in your order with the bartender you feel someone sit next to you, despite the various empty seats farther away. You sneak a glance at him through the mirror only to find him staring at you already. You grimace as you turn and hide your face in your hair. He was one of the guys from that group. 

When the bartender places your long island iced in front of you, quickly grab it. The stranger says something but you weren’t paying attention so you ask him to repeat it. 

“I asked if you know there’s no iced tea in that. It’s only like tequila, rum, gin, triple sec, vodka, and coke.” His southern drawl makes up for his awkward icebreaker.

“Good I hate iced tea.” You tell him with a scrunch in your face.

You see the fake mortification on his face after you insult the most beloved drink of the south. He even puts his hands on his heart like you gave him a heart attack. “Not from the south then?”

“No I am, I just hate that drink with a passion.” You fully turn your head to look at him, liking what you see. He has sandy blonde hair that’s covered by an army green hat. His eyes were like an ocean blue that you could stare at all day, he even had that dangerous southern charm. His skin even has a slight tan that makes his eyes pop even more. 

“I’m Benny,” he gives you a once over while waiting for you to tell him your name. You wonder if he likes what he sees.

After telling him your name you feel warmth spread through your body from the drink you’ve been nursing. You move to take off your hoodie, leaving you in a tank top. You remember your decision to forgo a bra when you catch Benny’s eyes drifting to your chest. Once he’s done with his assessment, his eyes travel back to you realizing he’s been caught.

You watch his face redden before he addresses it. “I’m… It’s not-”

Your giggle cuts off his nervous rant. “It’s ok. I don’t mind Benny,” you maintain eye contact with him while finishing your drink. You go to get the bartender’s attention before Benny interjects.

“You want another one? Let me take care of it.” Before you could even pretend to object he’s already ordered for you. When he turns back towards you there’s barely any space between you two, causing you to wonder when you two got so close. Not that you’re complaining.

With the alcohol loosening you up you place a hand on his shoulder before bringing your lips to the shell of his ear. “What do you want Benny?” 

You see from the way his back constricts that his breath quickens from your seemingly innocent question. “That depends entirely on you darling.” You face him again as you feel his hand on your thigh, inching its way higher. His hand taking up so much space makes you clench around nothing. There’s a temporary pause when the bartender sets your second drink down. 

You sip on it, eyeing Benny. “Men’s or Women’s restroom?”

He smirks at you before placing his mouth at your ear to whisper, “Family restroom, amatuer.”

You feel an involuntary shiver go down your spine. Placing the half empty drink on the counter you take Benny’s offered hand as he helps you off the stool. While you grab your bag Benny pays the tab before taking your hand in his, easily swallowing it.

You two walk through the airport under the guise of being a couple when really the both of you are like horny teenagers. Upon finding the family restroom you both check the coast before going in, Benny obviously letting you go first. After finding a hook to hang your bag you feel him behind you. His mouth ghosts over your neck, hands finding their way to your hips, and his hard length pulsing on your ass. 

He turns you around only to capture your lips in a messy kiss. You taste the whiskey he was drinking on his lips making you want more. With your hands flat on his chest you snake your tongue into his mouth, making him grip your hips harder and bringing your body closer to his. His thigh sat right in between your legs, allowing you to rock your hips against him. The soft fabric of your leggings coupled with his rough denim catching your clit had you reeling from pleasure. 

Soon enough you're moaning into Benny’s mouth, wetness pooling in your underwear. If you were thinking clearly you’d worry about it leaking onto your leggings. Benny’s hands stall your hips from grinding into his thigh further, causing a childish whine to leave your mouth. He won't leave you wanting for long when his hand dips into your underwear. He takes his time rubbing his fingers over your entrance, wetting them before slowly circling your clit. It’s sweet torture.

“All this for me?” Benny looks at you for an answer as if he didn’t already know. Still you oblige him by nodding your head and gazing in his eyes. You must have done something right because he finally takes two fingers and plunges them into your entrance. You cry out begging him for more, and he begins pumping them in and out of you while watching your hips rock into his fingers. He gently curls them inside you looking for that spongy spot, with a sharp jerk of your hips he knows he’s got it. 

He takes your mouth again but this time he’s holding your jaw. You tilt your head to give your tongue more room. As Benny keeps curling his fingers over your sweet spot you continuously moan into his mouth. A knot tightens in your lower stomach, getting tighter and tighter until you feel yourself clench down on his fingers. Your mouth opens in a silent cry and your hand digs into Benny’s biceps.

“That’s it cum all over my fingers baby.” Your head slumps against his chest while you regain enough strength to hold yourself up. You feel Benny remove his hands from your panties and you look up to find him sucking on them. Removing one hand from his bicep you move it down his body, cupping his prominent bulge. You hear his low groan while he rocks his hips into your hand. 

“Shit baby turn around.” As you follow his instructions you hear him unbuckle his pants and his zipper. You sneak a peek behind you only to see him stroking the thickest cock you’ve ever seen. His hand barely wraps around it fully. You pull down your leggings and panties, the latter almost sticking to you. Benny grabs your ass cheeks and spreads them wanting a full look at you.

Once he’s satisfied you feel him nudging your entrance, teasing you. Not being able to handle it you push back on him making him grab your hips. You feel a palm come down on your right cheek before he mumbles about you needing to be patient. The contact makes you jolt in excitement. Benny finally puts you out of your misery when he slowly rocks into you, wanting you to become comfortable with the stretch. 

Even though it’s a tight fit you love how you could feel him no matter how much or how little he moved. When he feels how you’re clenching around him he knows you’re ready. He places one hand on your shoulder and the other digging into your hip while he angles his hip into you. Feeling him fill you up fully causes your fists to ball up against the wall, your breathing turns into quick pants. 

Benny gets lost in the lust filled haze your cunt is giving him, the way you wrap around him is intoxicating. He hasn’t felt this way since he was a teenager, his ball clenching up letting him know that he’s close. He surprises you by sliding his hand down to circle your clit while he fucks into you deeply. 

The tension in your lower stomach builds quickly, the feeling bordering on overstimulation. It all comes to a head with a particular rough thrust that has you gushing all over Benny. The way you clench down on him has him cumming and putting his hand on the wall for support, right next to yours. The air in his lungs feels suspended as he basks in the afterglow of sex.

“I would beg for round two but my flight leaves soon.” Benny breathes out next to the shell of your ear. He pulls out of you leaving an empty feeling and a cold breeze. 

“Mine too.” You rasp before reaching in your bag to grab baby wipes to clean yourself up. You offer one to Benny after you’ve pulled up your pants, he thanks you with a forehead kiss. Heat fills your face and you turn to make sure you have all your things. 

The both of you bid each other a goodbye kiss outside the bathroom, you think that maybe you should’ve got his number. After separating you decide to buy some food to bring on the plane since you were starving. By the time you make it back to your terminal they’re boarding but your group hasn’t been called yet. 

By the time you make it on the plane you carefully search for your seat number. Once you find it you're stunned to find Benny is in the window seat next to you. The man in the aisle seat looks up at you with a smirk, you recognize him as one of the guys that was sitting at the table with Benny. His salt and pepper curls really emphasize his beauty, but that means nothing with that stupid shit-eating grin on his face. 

Benny is occupied with his face looking out of the window like a puppy dog so you slip in to get to your seat, hoping he won’t recognize you. The asshole next to you giggles at your misfortune, you glare at him causing him to turn in his seat. Still laughing. 

The jig is up when Benny’s thick thighs spread and nudge your leg, he whips his head down to apologize only to find you. While you stare straight ahead with your lips tucked into your mouth Benny looks at you in disbelief. He nudges you with his shoulder and gives you a panty dropping smile that has your thighs clenching. 

“You know I was really regretting not getting your number, I thought you might think I was a slut or something.” You laugh at his omission and the awkwardness that was previous there dissipates as you two look at each other. 

You begin eating your food and offer to share with Benny since you don’t finish it all. He inhales all of it and licks his fingers, flashbacks to him sucking his fingers after he made you cum have you staring heatedly at him. When you finally do meet his gaze he looks at you with understanding.

“About that round two,” you let your sentence trail off knowing he’ll catch on. 

“We haven’t even taken off yet baby,” his lips barely touched the shell of your ear. “But when the seatbelt sign goes off make sure you're ready.” He puts his hand on your thigh, rubbing his thumb back and forth. 

You and Benny spend the first hour learning more about each other, everything from your favorite colors to the reason why you’re going to Colombia. The seatbelt sign had turned off 30 minutes ago but neither of you paid any mind. Anyone who didn’t know you would think the both of you were dating, between the intimate touches and the hushed whispers. Neither of you were complaining, it seems you both wanted to bask in the made up reality.

When the flight attendants come down the aisle with their drink carts, you are relieved since you’ve been craving a sprite. The guy in the aisle seat who you’ve come to find out is named Santiago puts in his order first, you go to put in yours when she turns back only to have her ignore you in favor of Benny. 

He furrowed his eyebrows and asked what you want since he’s not that thirsty. She hands him the sprite you wanted and he passes it to you while the biscuits are passed down. Before she leaves she makes sure to ask if that's all he needs, you keep your head down while sipping your sprite unsure of what to do. Benny tells her he’s all set before setting his sights back on you, and that hand rubs the inside of your thigh again. 

You finish your sprite in record time while waiting for the attendants to come collect the trash. “Meet me in the bathroom.” You unbuckle your seatbelt and get up to head to the bathroom without waiting for a response. You’re only in the bathroom only a few seconds before you hear a playful knock on the door, you stare at Benny in disbelief.

“You couldn’t wait a little longer? Now everyone’s gonna know.” You scold him before pulling him into the tight space. 

“You realize there’s two restrooms back here right,” you roll your eyes at his response but smile when he pulls you closer by your waist. “Besides, I wanted to get you alone in the bathroom again.” He nudges his nose in your neck 

“That's not the point Benny,” still focusing on him basically trailing after you. 

“I can’t even bend you over in here.” He sighs into your neck as his lips leave tender kisses.

“You won’t need to.” Before he can question what you mean you’re already on your knees in front of him. Your hands running up and down his thighs before cupping his growing bulge. When you lock eyes with him it’s easy to see the effect you have on him. 

Your hands have a mind of their own unbuckling his belt and zipper letting it fall to his ankles, leaving him in his boxers. Maintaining eye contact you press a kiss to his clothed cock, you feel it jolt underneath your lips. Benny’s hands grip the sink hard enough to turn his knuckles white, you haven’t even put him in your mouth yet.

Finally you pull his boxers down and his cock springs out, staring you right in the face. You lick a stripe from his balls all the way to his leaky pink tip. You taste the saltiness of pre-cum and suck his tip into your mouth. Benny takes a sharp inhale as you swirl your tongue around and under his tip. Slowly working your way down his thick shaft you bring your hand up to play with his heavy balls. Benny’s hips jerk at the sensation making you take more of him in your mouth. With you bobbing your head up and down on his length he can’t help the moan that slips out of his mouth. Just hearing him lose control like that makes you moan while bobbing your head faster. 

Benny is entranced by the way your warm mouth wraps around him, your saliva making you glide all over him. His chest heaves feeling like there was limited air, or maybe you were just sucking it out of him. Literally. He balls one fist and bites it to keep from exposing you two while the other snakes its way onto the back of your head. 

“Shit baby I’m close,” he warns you thinking you’ll want him to finish elsewhere. But it seems to have the opposite effect, now you were hollowing your cheeks and swallowing around him. Benny can’t control the way his hips jerk towards your mouth, wanting everything you can give him.

He twitches in your mouth and you know it’s only a matter of time. As you wrap both arms around the back of his thighs taking him deeper, you nuzzle your nose in his light brown pubic hair. At the same time Benny lets out a loud groan, you feel his warm cum shoot into your throat. You stay there hollowing your cheek until Benny has to pull you off himself. He helps you get onto your feet before he pulls you into a messy kiss. His hands are in your hair breathing you into him like you’re oxygen. 

When he pulls away you feel a bit dizzy but give him a lazy grin. You turn to walk out of the bathroom but Benny snakes an arm around your front preventing you from leaving. “Uh uh I wanna smell you on my face later.” 

Which is exactly how you found yourself on the cramped sink with one ass cheek in and Benny’s face in between your thighs. Your discomfort was overpowered by his tongue flicking your g-spot over and over. His nose even brushed up against your clit in a way that had your eyes rolling to the back of your head. You were sure if anybody was outside the door they would hear your indiscretions, but right now you couldn’t bring yourself to care. Not when Benny was groaning into your pussy like he was feeling the same things you were. 

The vibrations of him groaning sent you into your orgasm at lightning speed, stomach clenched and eyebrow scrunched from the tightness in your body. You bite the sleeve of your hoodie to keep from screaming and really disrupting the plane. Benny continues his ministrations like you didn’t just cream all over his face it’s like deja vu except this time you're pulling him off of you. Looking down at his face you see it glisten in the shitty bathroom lighting, all because of you.

Benny stands at his full height and ushers you off the barely there counter. While wiping down you catch a glimpse of the indent from the sink on one ass cheek, Benny notices you staring and laughs when he sees. 

“It’s not funny Benny.” Even though you try to school your features you laugh too. You check yourself in the mirror one last time, making sure you’re semi-decent. Once you approve you turn around to open the door and step out, except the flight attendant that was interested in Benny is staring back at you. Your eyes widen and you realize you're blocking the door when Benny’s hand comes down to smack your ass, and grab it. 

“Don’t tell me you want me again? Jesus woman you’re insatiable.” As Benny finally steps out he smirks down at you before seeing why you were blocking the door. Not knowing what to do you hot tail it back to your seat, that asshole Santiago smirking at you. 

By the time you’re strapped in Benny makes his way into the row thanking you for leaving him high and dry. All you can do is smile and give him a nonchalant sorry. He ignores you and pulls up the divider between you two before pulling you into him. You didn't even know how tired you were until resting your head under his shoulder.

………..

By the time you and Benny woke up the pilots were pulling into the gate. He and his friends walked with you to baggage claim but it was mostly Benny at your side. He insisted on getting your bag for you and making sure you got a cab. 

You didn’t argue. After pointing out your bag he carries it while the guys wait for theirs. Benny looks at you without saying anything, your mind races at what could be going through his head. But it comes to a halt when he asks, "Do you think I could get your number?"

“What you wanna meet up again while we’re here?” You joke before pulling out your phone to exchange numbers.

“No- well yes but I want to take you out when we get back to the states.” He admits sheepishly.

“If you would like to go out with me.”

You give him the goofiest smile before responding, “Yeah I’d like that.” with the two of you grinning like idiots Santiago, Frankie, and even Will look away at the nauseatingly cute display you guys got going on. They’ll get on him later.

Before Benny sends you off in a taxi he leans down close to your ear. “You’re gonna let me know when you reach your hotel right baby?” His low voice makes you want to drag him in the car with you. 

“Yes Benny.” You playfully roll your eyes and he grabs under your chin to give you one more kiss. Once he’s satisfied he opens the door for you to get in, but not without slapping your ass one last time. He even gave the driver money for the fare and before you could protest he closed the door waving you off. 

……….

On the way to the airport you think of all the fun you had on this trip, you even have a hot date waiting when you get back. Making your way through TSA you feel a bit sad to leave but you had a great time. You even scored some cute trinkets you can give to your friends. This was a great trip however you gotta thank Benny for starting it off so well.

Benny and the guys got the rest of the money without a hitch, now able to live their lives somewhat stress-free. Frankie and Will were especially happy to be able to do their own thing. As Benny boards the plane he thinks about how excited he is for the date you guys have set up, he had to stop talking about it since the guys got tired of listening. Doesn’t mean it didn’t run through his mind 24/7, or you for that matter.

Once he finds his seat number he does a double take, you’re already sitting down in the middle seat. He’s never moved so fast in his life to take the aisle seat, you almost get whiplash from seeing Benny next to you. Again. Santiago sees the two of you sitting together again and immediately wants to get another flight. It was funny the first time but he knows this time will be worse.

“Fuck no, one of you is switching with me this time.” He turns to look at Frankie and Will who look around as if they didn’t hear him, so he takes one of their seats in the row behind you and Benny. 

Will is ultimately the one stuck with you two this time. On the bright side, neither of you needs a ‘bathroom break’, but the nonstop talking and cuddling have him ordering headphones and an eye mask from the flight attendant. 

#benny miller x female reader #benny miller x reader #triple frontier smut #benny miller #triple frontier fic #benny miller x f!reader

[pimosworld]

Unrequited

Pairing-Santiago Garcia x f!reader x Frankie Morales

Series Summary-Francisco was always afraid of settling down. He left Santiago to pick up the pieces after Colombia and now someone else is taking his place. Now he must cope with repairing the past without disrupting his future.

CW-18+,MDNI,Angst, Fluff, hurt/comfort, Frankie has a lot of apologies to hand out, lots of food references, fun game of poker and a revelation, more apologies and a proposition.

WC-5.9k

A/N- Happy Frankie Friday, our boy is still going through it a bit but that’s to be expected when you ghost your friends for three years. At least he has Benny for some comedic relief.

[Series Masterlist][Main Masterlist]

Not beta read

Chapter II Pining

  verb

gerund or present participle: pining

suffer a mental and physical decline, especially because of a broken heart.

  You stretch your sore muscles as best you can with the human weight that is Santiago pressed against you, his arm holding you close even in sleep. You knew he was getting better and that he was starting to get over it but Frankie’s sudden appearance is causing a relapse in his behavior. 

  The mornings you got out of bed before him or took too long to tell him you were running late from work would be met with his frantic state of mind. Always afraid of being abandoned again, left without a word or goodbye. You assured him as much as you could that you would never do something like that. Months of convincing him to go to counseling was met with short words and utterings of I don’t have a problem. It wasn’t until he’d awoken to you crying and scared one night that he was yelling in his sleep that you were going to leave him that he finally caved and went. 

  Therapy helped tremendously but you can’t blame him after the harsh words that were spoken last night that he thinks you couldn’t hear. Venomous words spoken between ex lovers, hurt people hurt people. 

  So you lay here a little longer, waiting for him to stir awake so he doesn’t think you left him. You rub your legs together easing the sore ache from the previous night, trying to ignore your full bladder. 

  You can feel his lips on the back of your neck, slowly making their way down leaving goosebumps in their wake.

  “Good morning baby, how’d you sleep?” He doesn’t answer with words, just hums as he grinds his hips into you. Avoiding the question that you already know the answer to. His hand slides over your stomach, dipping lower before you gently grab his wrist pulling it to your lips as you turn to face him. “As much as I would love to do that again, I really need to pee.”

  “Why didn’t you get up?” His sleepy voice cracks a little as he dips his head to kiss your neck. Your nails scratch at his scalp as you card through his salt and pepper curls. You tug on them eliciting a groan from him as he meets your eyes. You trace your thumb along the stubble of his jaw, memorizing every line and scar that you may have missed the last time you looked at him. He’s so distractingly handsome that you almost forgot he asked you a question. One that he already knows the answer to. 

  “I wanted to wait until you were awake.” You give him a wary smile almost ashamed to admit it, not wanting him to feel bad. 

  His face drops and he wraps his arms around you, rolling you on top of him until you’re almost falling out of the bed, forced to plant your feet on the cold hardwood floor. He whistles low as you pad to the bathroom, trying not to feel flustered knowing he’s checking you out. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been, he always makes you feel giddy. 

  When you exit the bathroom he’s propped up on one elbow holding the blanket up so you can join him in the warm confines of your bed. He shudders as your cold hands roam up his toned chest and wrap around his neck. 

  “You can’t be getting a uti because you’re afraid to wake me up cariño.” He half mumbles into your hair. 

  You sigh deeply. “I know…I just didn’t want you to wake up and not find me there.” 

  He kisses your forehead lingering briefly before speaking. “I know you’re worried about me with Frankie being here but I promise I’m okay.” He even thinks he sounds unsure of himself as he says it. 

  “I know you’re not okay and that’s fine, you just have to remember you’re not doing this alone.” 

  You’re an enigma, he thinks. How you manage to find the good in all situations. You’re the glass half full to his half empty. He was surviving before he met you and that was fine but he can’t go back to just surviving now that he knows what it’s like to be thriving. 

  “What did I do to deserve you?” He slides his hands up your back massaging and kneading the stress out of you. 

  “Mmmm…you’ve had your fair share of things you did to deserve being taken care of.” His stomach grumbles and you both chuckle. “Speaking of that…do you want me to make breakfast?” 

  “If I ever say no to your food I want you to shoot me.” 

  ****

  Frankie didn’t want to get out of bed, the exhaustion had fully settled in and he quickly realized how long it’s been since he actually rested. Constantly trying to stay busy to keep from actually feeling something. The conversation with Santiago had gone in the complete opposite direction he had hoped but he only had himself to blame. He didn’t expect to just waltz back into his life like nothing had happened but you being here was an unexpected surprise and most certainly changed his approach. 

  He’d never slept in the guest room so it went unnoticed at how beautiful the morning sun looked peaking through the curtains. The orange Santiago had insisted on painting one accent wall compliments it perfectly. It wasn’t until they bought this house that Frankie realized how much Santi cared about interior design. He wanted to tease him about it but opted not to when he saw how relaxed he was deciding on paint colors and furniture. 

  It’s an odd feeling washing over him as the smell of butter and cinnamon infiltrates his senses. It’s been too long since he’s awoken to the smell of anything other than stale cigarettes and last night's leftovers. He’s kicking the blankets off before he can register and rummaging through his bag for a pair of sweats. He can hear some soft singing coming from the kitchen as he makes his way down the hall. The smell is getting stronger as his stomach rumbles and Santiago comes into view, leaning back in the chair at the kitchen island as he not so subtly watches you retrieve the mystery item from the oven. 

  The man was always a perv when it came to checking him out and it seems nothing has changed. He can’t really blame him as he takes in your appearance. Another one of Santiago’s shirts adorning your frame and some of the shortest shorts he’s ever seen just barely covering your ass. 

  “Nice of you to join us.” Santi’s arms are crossed with a slight smirk at catching Frankie ogling you. 

  “Morning Francisco!” You’re beaming as you wipe your hands on a spare towel and begin to plate what he now sees to be biscuits. “I hope you’re hungry, I made cheddar honey biscuits, bacon and I’m about to start the eggs.” As if you couldn’t get any more perfect. 

  Santi gestures to the seat next to him and Frankie pulls out the chair, starting to feel a little less like a guest in his own home. 

  “How do you take your eggs?” 

  “Over medium” “Over medium” 

  If the tandem answer bothers you, you don’t show it as you expertly crack an egg into a bowl on the side of the stove and one into the pan. Santi adjusts next to him, seemingly a little flustered attempting to ignore his slip up. 

  “You don’t have to make-“ 

  “Don’t be a martyr over eggs.” Santi cuts him off before he can finish and you turn, giving him a stern look before whisking the mixture in the bowl. 

  “At least he doesn’t eat them scrambled like a child.” You mutter under your breath and Frankie tries to hide his smile behind his hands as Santi flips him off. 

  “I heard that chiquita.” He teases and you shrug as you plate up the rest of Frankie’s food. Retrieving the bacon from the warm oven and setting two hefty biscuits next to it. 

  Frankie stares at the plate, much like he did last night and he doesn’t even know where to begin. That’s a lie actually, he knows as he dives into the biscuit without another word. The buttery flaky crust with a hint of something sweet hits his senses and he can’t help the moan that escapes him. 

  He can see your shoulders moving as you laugh and he doesn’t even care with how good this is. Your food is a religious experience that only a chosen few should get to enjoy. As he glances over at Santi eating in silence a tinge of jealousy sparks in him that he gets to indulge in this all the time. You,this food,this life. For now Frankie has to live with the choices he made. 

  “Don’t be shy Frankie there’s plenty more.” You politely cover your mouth while you eat your breakfast and somehow finish cleaning the mess in a matter of minutes. 

  Frankie leans back in his chair rubbing his belly unashamed. Santi glances over noticing the way he looks so content and a slight gleam in his eye. “So does this guy do anything around here?” 

  Santi stands from his chair gathering both of their plates. “I provide other services.” He kisses you on the cheek as you playfully swat at him. “I also wash the dishes.” 

  “You own a dishwasher.” 

  “Frankie I don’t make the rules, I just do what the lady asks.” Of course Santiago doesn’t notice that this is the first time he’s used his name, not his government name or his call sign or the dreaded name he gets when people are mad at him but his chosen name. Frankie watches you both as you exchange subtle glances, some unspoken language between the two of you that he used to understand but it’s been too long. 

  Without words Santi is grabbing things from the fridge and setting them out on the counter for you as you retrieve some bowls from the cabinet. You’re filling a large pot with water as Santi returns to his seat at the island having fulfilled his duties of making piles of unfinished ingredients on the table. 

  “How much time do I have?” 

  “We don’t have to be at Wills until one so don’t rush cariño.” Santi says as Frankie gives him a quizzical look. “Barbecue…you’re going.” 

  Frankie tries to school the expression on his face into a neutral one as his stomach drops. He knew he needed to talk to all of them eventually, but he didn’t anticipate it being his second day back. He knows he can’t avoid the conversation forever and the sooner he rips the band aid the better. There’s too much weighing on his shoulders that he needs to get off so they can all live better lives. At least Frankie hopes after he talks to them that they are appreciative and see all he’s done to get back in their good graces. 

  “If I don’t make this pasta salad Benny will kill me.” He realizes after a moment that you’re speaking to him and he can’t wipe this dumb look off his face. 

  “Well if it’s anything like I’ve had already I can see why he’s obsessed.” You smile up at him as you chop some bell peppers with perfect precision. He’s not sure how you’ve not cut yourself as he looks from your eyes to the cutting board, but it’s almost reminiscent of how he feels when he’s flying; effortless.

  Frankie finally breaks your gaze as you turn around to pour the pasta in the boiling water. Santi’s eyes bore into him as he leans back in his chair with his arms crossed. Santiago was never good at subtlety, especially when it came to his outward appearance. If he had to title this one it would read if you keep flirting with her I’ll smother you with a pillow. 

  ****

  The three of you are in Santi’s Jeep on the way to Will's house. You insisted after going back and forth with Frankie to the point of awkwardness that he sit in front. You hilariously and completely ended the argument when you sat in the back and shrugged your shoulders knowing Santi would riot if he was made out to be some chauffeur with you both in the back. 

  The car smells divine…you managed to make two types of salad, some cupcakes and those cookies he can’t stop thinking about. Frankie’s recently caught wondering how Santi is still in such good shape with the way you cook. He watches the way his muscles strain against the black tee shirt as he shifts gears. The way his jeans fit his thighs just right as he-

  “Something on your mind Fish?” He’s been caught this time and it certainly won’t be the last time. 

  Frankie’s eyes meet yours in the rearview mirror. “Nothing…Just wondering how you still have a waistline when you live with Julia Child.” 

  You laugh and bite down on your lip to stop it from bubbling over in full blown hysterics. Frankie looks away but you don’t miss the way he smiles as his tongue pokes out from between his teeth. 

  Frankie stares out the window, something blooming in his stomach at the way he made you laugh again. It’s infectious and at this point he doesn’t even care…he knows full well that if he looks to his left he’ll see the second chapter of Santi’s death glare titled keep it up and I’ll crash this car. 

  ****

  It’s not a far drive to Will's house, but there was no way they were walking in the Florida heat with all this food in tow. Frankie swallows hard as Santi makes the last turn down their street. He has seen this house many times, it still sits beautifully at the end of the block nestled among two live oak trees in the front yard. The most unique house on the block and the largest backyard. He helped Benny and Will look for it so they could all be close to each other. The plan fell into place just before they left for Colombia. They closed on the house one month before leaving and for that Frankie is relieved to see all was not lost in that jungle. 

  He rubs his clammy hands along his jeans as Santi parks the car in the long driveway. He waits for a moment as you both exit the car to gather the supplies. He wants to get in the driver's seat and head home or maybe just get out and walk straight to the airport. Anything to avoid the possible rejection he faces when he walks into Wills backyard to see his best friends brothers again.

  The passenger side door is opened for him and you’re standing there expectantly with your hand out. “He said you might need some help.” 

  It feels childish and yet he needs it all the same as he takes your hand in his and steps out of the Jeep. It’s so small in his as you lace your fingers and pull him to the front door instead of the side gate to spare him a brief moment to gather his thoughts. He lets you lead as he tries not to step on your feet that need a few more strides than him as you approach the large wooden door. 

  The house is pristine and cozy on the inside as you enter. Santiago’s in the open concept kitchen putting away all the goods you made as Frankie looks around for anyone else. You squeeze his hand once before letting go to join him in the kitchen. 

  “Ben already took the pasta salad so that’s as good as gone.” Santiago says as he cracks open a beer and hands it to Frankie. Anything to take the edge off. 

  “I’m gonna go find Emma babe.” You kiss Santi on the cheek as you exit the kitchen leaving the two men alone. 

  Frankie’s eyes go wide as you shriek from the patio and Santi laughs. “Put me down Ben!” 

  Bennys voice is carried away with the sound of the music over the outside speakers. “Not a chance sweetheart.” 

  Santi nods to Frankie as he takes a huge swig of his beer. “Let’s head outside before she kills him.” 

  ****

  “Nice to finally meet you Frankie.” Will’s wife Emma is just as he pictured. Tall brunette with perfect hair and an even more perfect smile. She’s been kind enough to show him around the house and the yard as a means of distraction from the not so warm welcome he got from Will. 

  “It’s nice to meet you too.” He sounds like a kid that just got scolded for stealing as he removes his hat and scrubs his fingers through his hair. Emma’s showing him the room Benny is in. He spent what little money he had to open his own gym so they’re graciously letting him stay to save some money. Frankie feels particularly guilty about that right now but soon that will change. 

  “The office will hopefully be a nursery soon.” She turns to him offering a genuine smile. “Then we’ll have a live-in babysitter.” 

  “I’m hoping you don’t mean Benny.” Frankie chides as she throws her head back and laughs. 

  “He’s not all that bad and he could do with some practice.” Emma motions with her hands as she finishes the tour and Frankie feels like he’s having some sort of out of body experience. Walking through the home that he helped pick out so that Will could start a family. Everyone was doing exactly what they set out to do and Frankie was just…idling. 

  “Frankie?” She’s staring at him now, nearly eye to eye with him as she places her hand gently on his elbow so as not to startle him. He supposed she’s used to dealing with spooked vets by now. It’s almost like approaching a caged animal. “He’ll come around…I know he loves you, he just needs some time.” 

  Frankie’s too embarrassed to ask if she means Santi or Will so he just nods and says ‘thank you’. 

  ****

  Frankie’s on his second helping of pasta salad as he sits at a table with the guys and some of Benny's friends from the gym listening to Santi drone on about his security consulting business. Of course Santiago found a way to travel around telling other people how to do their job. 

  Frankie looks up from his plate to see Will staring daggers at him. He’s a coward to look away but he’s not ready to face that scrutiny. It’s not much better as his line of vision drifts to you and Emma laying out by the pool talking and laughing. The sun is beating down on his neck as a bead of sweat trickles down his spine. You roll to your front on the lounger and untie the strings of your top. The white bikini already left little to the imagination and now he can just barely see the soft curve of your breast as you adjust to get comfortable. 

  “They’re perfect aren’t they. ” Frankie nearly jumps out of his skin at the sound of Ben’s voice in his ear. 

  “What?!” 

  “Emma and Will…I saw her giving you a tour earlier.” Ben winks at him as he steals a bite from Frankie’s plate. Frankie starts to speak but Ben cuts him off and leans in closer. “I know everyone has already given you enough shit so I’m not going to. I just hope you’re here to stay.” 

  “I am.” Frankie says it a little louder than he intended and he can feel Will and Santi’s eyes on him. The mindless chatter amongst the table has continued but the four of them are waiting on a limb as Frankie realizes this is the first time he’s actually said it. “I’m making plans to stay.” 

  Santi raises his eyebrows in surprise as Will finally speaks. “You gonna find a flying gig?” 

  Frankie doesn’t really need to work but he supposes he’ll go crazy if he doesn’t find something to occupy his mind. “I don’t know yet but I’ve got some money saved until I figure it out.” He takes a sip of his beer to disguise the little white lie. 

  Ben slaps him on the back and he splutters his beer. “You can come help me at the gym.” Ben’s shadow boxing him as he tries to clear his throat. “Let’s see if this old man can still spar with the great Benjamin Miller.” His friends at the table roll their eyes along with the rest at his large ego. 

  Frankie points the butt of his empty bottle at the younger man. “Ben, I can still kick your ass.” 

  “Is that so?” 

  Frankie nods slowly. 

  “I don’t think he can climb a flight of fucking stairs.” Will's voice cuts in and the table goes silent. There’s a slight smirk on his face as Benny erupts in laughter next to him. Santi drops his head to the table as the rest of the men join in and for a fleeting moment it all feels like it used to. 

  ****

  The parties died down a bit and it’s just the guys left while you and Emma say your goodbyes. The boys are staying for poker and that will give Frankie the perfect opportunity to talk to them. He’s not sure how much longer he could hold it in. 

  “Are you sure you’ll be fine walking home?” You approach Santi and the guys around the kitchen island.

  “They’ll both survive.” Will answers for him as he finishes the dishes in the sink. 

  “Cariño please don’t wait up for me this time.” Santi says through gritted teeth as he pulls you into a hug, kissing you on the cheek. Ben steps up behind him making mock kissing gestures and Will grabs him by the collar dragging him off to the garage. 

  Frankie awkwardly starts to walk away and leave you two alone when you call out to him. 

  “Francisco Morales…make sure he doesn’t gamble all his money away.” It’s said in jest as you gather your things to leave. 

  “I’ll do my best, hermosa but I make no promises.” 

  Frankie’s sure you don’t notice the slip up as you wave them goodbye and exit the front door. Heat creeps up his neck and he doesn’t even want to look Santi in the eyes. 

  “Hermosa hmmm?” Santi nods his head toward the garage door and steps beside him. “I see you still get flustered when beautiful people use your full name.” 

  Frankie follows closely behind as he breathes out through his nose. 

  This was going to be a very long night. 

  ****

  They’ve got him all wrong. 

  What started out as a fun game of poker quickly became a tense game of figuring out what Frankie’s play was. They’ve wrongly mistaken his nervous face for a poker face and everyone keeps folding. 

  Just spit it out 

  Frankie’s sitting here in Will's converted three car garage. Half of it was a shop to work on his motorcycle and whatever project his mind needed to keep him occupied. The other half is almost an exact replica of their favorite bar, all the way down to the teak wood flooring and an old school saloon type dresser with a roll top bar in front. He’s been trying to admire all the work he’s put in. The pool table and matching poker table just add to the charm. 

  You’re stalling

  “Fish, what’s your move?” Santiago’s voice is dripping with annoyance as Will stares down his cards like they’re going to change suits right in front of him. 

  He stares down at his hand and the pile of chips in front of him. He actually has a good hand this time, three of a kind and pocket aces. 

  It’s not about the money

  “All in.” He pushes his chips in the middle while Santi and Will quickly follow suit. Benny scoffs from behind the bar as he pours himself another beer having lost all his chips ages ago. 

  “You losers are gonna fall for it again?” 

  “Who are you calling a loser?” Will chides the younger man as Santi laughs behind his cards. 

  “I can read this pendejo like a book…he doesn’t have shit.” Santi says the last part playfully but the first part used to ring true. 

  Frankie lays down his cards and Will curses under his breath and throws his face down. Bennys laughing to himself over in the corner but Santiago’s grin is deepening by the second. It takes more muscles to frown, which is why he thinks Santi has such strong features. When he smiles though…it almost knocks him off his feet. 

  A trickle of sweat runs down Frankie’s back as Will raises an eyebrow at Santi. He leans back in his chair crossing his arms. “Let’s see ‘em Pope.” 

  Money,Money,Money

  Ten,Jack,Queen,King,Ace. Each flick of his wrist and the sound of the cards on the table as Santiago draws out his torture echo in the room. He leans in dramatically, dragging all the chips to sit in front of him. The sound of Benny whooping behind him and Will’s slow clap is drowned out by the ringing in his ears as he stares at the Royal Flush in the suit of hearts. Okay karma,you made your point. 

  “I went back for the money.” 

  He knew there was no right way to drop this kind of bomb on them. Judging by the silence in the room, perhaps there was a wrong way. 

  It’s so quiet you can hear the rustling of the chips settled in front of Santi falling by the wayside. 

Will locks eyes with Frankie as he leans back in his chair. The weight of what he just said hits him like a ton of bricks.

  “So we’re rich.” Ben’s voice cuts through the silence as he pours himself another drink. 

  “Ben, are you kidding me!” Will goes to stand as Santi lays a gentle hand on him urging him backwards. 

  As crass as it may sound coming out of the younger man’s mouth he couldn’t hide from it anymore. “Ya Ben, we’re rich.” 

  “Why?” Santi sounds calmer than he would’ve imagined after being silent for so long. He expected a fight from him, yelling and cursing. Frankie’s brain is doing somersaults trying to keep up with his emotions. Did he want Santi to yell? To tell him he was wrong for putting his life in danger. 

  Maybe there’s some weird fucked of part of Frankie that wants to be treated like a martyr so he can justify all the shit he’s put them through these last few years. Or maybe it’s just hard for him to realize that Santi was capable of changing for the right person. 

  “I did it for you…for us.” Frankie corrects although he’s not sure why. He could be nothing but honest in front of the men he risked his life for.

  Santi huffs a laugh as he shifts in his seat to look at Frankie. He picks up a stray chip rolling it on top of his fingers, some nervous tick he picked up during their army days. “You sure you didn’t do it for you.” There he is. 

  “What the fucks that suppposed to mean.” Frankie bites out ready for a fight. The fight he’s wanted since he landed here, back home. 

  “You’re gonna tell me that you didn’t go on some suicide mission without telling us…” He takes a moment to calm his breathing and lower his voice. “You did this so you could come back with something. To show us that you didn’t just leave everything for no reason. That you didn’t walk away from the best thing in your life because you got scared.” He tosses the chip and it lands in front of Frankie as Ben whistles low under his breath. 

  Santiago always had a way with words. He could rally the team when they were feeling down or nervous about a mission. He could convince higher ups to do things for him and make it seem like it was their idea to begin with. He could charm the pants off anyone he laid his sights to for one night or wax poetic to the love of his life. 

  He could also make his words cut like a knife. Those same words could make any bullet Frankie’s ever taken feel like a bee sting in comparison. If Frankie wanted him to see that he’s changed he was going to half to meet him more than half way. He’s wounded and hurt, absolutely incapable of seeing anything besides what he’s been through the last three years. 

  “You’re right.” Foreign words leave his lips not often spoken to the man with the ego the size of Texas. Frankie scrubs his jaw, kneading his fingers in that spot of patchy beard. “You’re right Santiago, I didn’t want to come back empty handed with nothing to show for myself. I felt like a failure after Colombia.” 

  “We all did.” Will cuts in as he slaps his hand down on the table. Loose chips falling to the floor. 

  Frankie lets out a long sigh. “I know man…I don’t mean.” Frankie underestimated how much damage he had done. Not just to Santi but to everyone. “I’m sorry. This was the only way I knew how to apologize, even if it comes off wrong I don’t regret one second of it. We all deserve this money and you know that.” He points at Will before continuing. “You can be mad at me all you want, I'm not running this time. I’m gonna stay and fix this even if it takes me the rest of my life.” 

  Santi stands abruptly, saluting Ben and squeezing Will's shoulder as he exits the garage. 

  Will slides the small notepad for scratch paper towards him, scribbling down some numbers. He clicks the pen and tosses the notepad to Frankie as he stands from the poker table. “I suppose this is my fault.” 

  Frankie tilts his head in question. 

  “I gave those coordinates to Pope.” He clicks his tongue as he rests his hands on the table next to him, eyes drawing up in mischief. “But he told me he lost them.” 

  Frankie stares down at a long list of numbers. “What’s this?”

  “My banking info.” Will looks at him then a little more tired behind the eyes than he’s ever seen. “I love you Fish, he loves you too.” Will slaps him on the back and exits the garage leaving Frankie with the younger Miller. 

  Frankie doesn’t turn around but he can picture Ben behind him. “Goodnight Ben, my favorite and only brother in the world. I love you soooo much.” He’s definitely miming with his hands. “Goodnight Will, even though you’re a pain in my ass I wouldn’t know what to do without you.”

  Frankie laughs a little bit. It's short lived as a cold piece of ice hits the back of his neck running down his shirt right into the open crack of his jeans. 

  “What the fuck Ben!” Frankie turns in his seat to see him crunching on some ice. He narrowly misses another piece thrown at his head. 

  “I want my money by tomorrow.” He does his worst impression of a mobster as he leaves Frankie alone in the garage. 

  ****

  Santi sits on the curb in front of Will’s house as he hangs his head in his hands. Thankfully for him it’s a decently cool night compared to the awful humidity he’s usually subjected too. He often wonders why they all settled here instead of somewhere off the grid. It’s comforting in a sense, it feels like home. 

  It’s tearing him up inside holding onto all this anger for Frankie when he really just wants to tell him he loves him. He thought he would feel better after getting it all out, finally laying down his cards so to speak. It brewed somewhere underneath for all those years and as cathartic as it was to say it out loud it didn’t change what happened. 

  Now he’s left seemingly with everything he could possibly want and he feels numb. 

  Santi hears the front door close softly behind him as Frankie makes his way down the path. He doesn’t want to argue anymore, he just wants to let this all go and finally live a peaceful life with enough money to make sure he’ll never have to sweat again. 

  “I don’t want to fight with you anymore.” He looks up to Frankie holding out his hand to help him off the curb. “Please forgive me.” His soft brown eyes look down at him. The ones he could never resist even if he tried. 

  He accepts his hand as he hoists him off the ground dusting off his jeans. “I forgave you a long time ago Fish.I had to for my own sanctity.” 

  If it’s a misstep he doesn’t correct himself. Sanity or sanctity aside, he knows hating someone for that long will eat you alive. “I would not be capable of loving her the way that I do, if I had not forgiven you.” 

  “Do you still love me?” Frankie asks, as selfish as it may be. Not entirely sure of what answer he’s expecting. 

  He’s backlit by the street lamps creating a soft halo around his brown and graying curls. Santiago has pictured them doing this walk so many times in his dreams. Moving here to start a life with him, walking home after a long day of hanging out with their brothers to head home and curl up in the soft sheets of the master bedroom. 

  “I never stopped loving you.” Frankie takes his hand then and he doesn’t pull away. “I never could even if I tried.” 

  Santi’s trying not to get choked up as he stares at their hands. Frankie grips his chin tilting it up towards him but he abruptly pulls away. 

  “I thought you said-“

  “I know what I said. I love you.” He gestures between them. “But this…can’t happen without her.” 

  Frankie’s nostrils flare as he gives him an aporetic look. 

  “Don’t give me that shit Frankie, I see the way you look at her.” 

  “Looking isn’t illegal.” His possessiveness over someone that doesn’t belong to him comes out harsher than he intended. 

  “No you’re right it’s not, but you can’t have your cake and eat it too.” Santi spits back at him as he glances over at the house that’s no longer Will’s. “Let’s keep moving.” 

  Santi gets two steps ahead before Frankie yanks his arm back bringing him face to face. Daring him to call his bluff. 

  “Isn’t that what you’re telling me…that I can have my cake and eat it too.” His body’s pressed against his, they’re so close he can breathe his air as he practically spits fire. 

  “Yes Francisco, that’s what I’m telling you.” He gently prys Frankie’s hand from his arm putting some space between them. “But I’m not doing it behind her back.” 

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[jeewrites]

Hold Fast - Sneak Peek!

Rating: 18+ MDNI (no smut in sneak peak)

A/N: For my first Frankie Friday I'm posting a sneak peek to my first fan fic Hold Fast (a one-shot? part one? possibly more?). Thank you to @vyduan for being my beta and my write or die! Grateful to everyone who voted in my poll and @katareyoudrilling for encouraging me to post. Full piece coming Friday, Feb 16th!

Tags: no y/n, gymbff!Benny, reader is a powerlifting girlie described as short, Tom is alive unfortunately (we hate Tom), Tom owns a bar, Pope owns a gym, alcohol, brief body insecurity and Frankie being down on himself, swearing (I'm new to this so please lmk if I missed anything!)

Word Count: 591 of ~3.9k

Benny was surprised to see you walk into Pope's one night an hour before closing since you always trained in the mornings. You had given him a short head nod instead of your usual big smile before stalking to a platform and slamming your bag down. 

"Yooooo, everything ok?" he asks as he walks over. 

"Does it look like I'm okay," you huff, aggressively wrestling your knee sleeves on. Glancing at him, you immediately apologize when he hesitates and takes a step back.

"Sorry, Benny. I'll be a lot better after I pick up some heavy things and put them down."

"Might help if you want to talk about it?" he ventures leaning against the barbell.

You finish tying your squat shoes before looking at him again with dejected eyes and sighing. 

"I just went on a crappy date with a guy from one of those dating apps," you sigh again. "He spent the whole time talking about himself and how much he works out. Then he had the fucking audacity to question me when he asked how much I could lift."

"Fucking asshole!" Benny feels himself getting steamed. 

"He just stormed out of the restaurant and left me with the bill when I refused to change my answer," you shrug, but Benny sees your jaw tick. "Apparently, I squat and deadlift more than he does and he couldn't date someone who could do that." You roll your eyes and huff.

"WTF! What a total loser. You don't need a guy like that who doesn't appreciate you," Benny replies incensed. He sees your face fall for a moment, eyes downcast and tight.

"I just — I've been trying to put myself out there again and it sucks," you mumble, cheeks flush with embarrassment. "It's also been kinda lonely since I moved here, and I guess I could just use more friends, too."

"I'M YOUR FRIEND!" 

"Yeah, my gym friend! We don't do anything outside of this hot, sweaty box Benny," you remind him with a small smile and playful shove to get him off your barbell. 

Benny decides this is completely unacceptable and immediately remedies this by inviting you to the next hangout with him and his ex-Delta Force friends at Redfly's, a local bar nearby. "You know Pope and Will already," he reassures, "Tom's the owner of the bar and he's an asshole, but he's our asshole. And there's Catfish — we call him Fish for short. We've been trying to get him to come work out here, but he's been busy with his new pilot job for the hospital. And he shares custody of his 3-year-old daughter with his ex."

He could see your brain turning over all the information he was throwing at you. You don't seem to react either way to the news that Fish has an ex and a daughter. As you adjust the bar height you respond, "You sure? Don't want to crash a regular thing that you have with your guys."

"Nah, it'll be great! They'll love you!" Benny's determined to get you to come. 

You hand him your phone. "Well... okay. Text me the details?"

With your phone in hand, Benny puts his number in to text himself and then convinces you to show him your dating profile. Between sets of squats you both take turns swiping on possible matches, Benny teasing you on your picks. Ever observant, Benny notices your preference for profiles with tall, brown-haired, brown-eyed photos. As you work through your next set, Benny sneaks his phone out and immediately texts Fish.

#frankie morales x you #frankie x reader #frankie morales fanfic #triple frontier #frankie catfish morales #benny miller #happy frankie friday #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales x f!reader #pedro pascal characters

[musings-of-a-rose]

Pairing: Benny Miller x ofc "Lily Morales" (21 year old daughter of Frankie Morales)

Word Count: 9000+

Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!

Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story. 

Notes: Listen, I’ve had this in my head for a long time and I just had to get it out. I know the dbf trope may be overdone, and it’s not a trope I normally read, but I just…they kept talking and I had to get it out. Sometimes the fic writes you. Thanks to @mermaidxatxheart for reading this over and helping me get unstuck. And to @avengers-fixation and @rayslittlekitten for also beta reading and giving me some excellent feedback to help this take a better shape!

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**Reader is not described

Main Masterlist

Benny Miller Masterlist

"What do you want to do for your birthday, mija?" 

I shrug, popping another blueberry in my mouth. "I don't know. Wanna order pizza and watch a movie?"

My dad gives me a look, pointing his fork at me. "Is that what you want to do?"

I don't know. What do 21 year olds want to do besides get shit faced on their 21st? 

"I don't know, dad."

"I think you should go out with your friends."

"Are you really telling me I should go get shit faced on my birthday?"

He chuckles. "No, but you're turning 21. You don't wanna hang out with your old man."

"I always want to hang out with you."

"I love you too, but you're young. You should hang out with your friends."

"I'm fine here with you, dad."

"Look," he sighs and sets his spoon down, looking at me. "Be safe, call me if you need me to come get you or something, but go out. Be 21." 

He won't let up, I can see it in his eyes. "If it means so much to you, I'll go out."

—----

God, I'm bored. My friends all squealed when I finally caved in and said we could go out drinking for my birthday. They picked me up and brought me to a bar, claiming a booth on the side. They had me place the order for drinks, my first at 21, and then paid, splitting the bill amongst themselves. But while I nursed a drink, they kept slamming them back, getting increasingly more drunk. Eventually, they all got up and hobbled onto the dance floor. Well, not an official dance floor, more like a space they drunkenly cleared out while putting on songs on the ancient jukebox in the corner. Some other patrons joined in and soon there was a small group of men around them, laughing and swaying along while I stayed seated at our table. 

"You look bored as fuck, Lil."

—----

Benny:

This week had been rough. Hell, this whole month had been rough. Another girl that just wanted to use him for a fun time had come and gone, leaving Benny feeling a little more than hollow. They never stay long, always wanting his fun side. If he let down his mask for just a moment, showing them all of him, they run. It hurts but if he's being honest with himself, none of them felt right. Like they were placeholders, just someone to pass the time with. Or distract him from the girl he really likes, the one he can't have. 

He takes another swig from his beer, the one he'd been nursing for a while when this large group of about 10 college aged girls comes in the bar, squealing and talking loudly. They make a big deal of securing a booth, practically yelling about how it's someone's birthday. And then, he sees her. 

Lily, his Lily being shoved forward from the group of girls, her short, pleated skirt fanning out as they tell her to go order drinks and they'll pay. When did the feelings for her start? His mind goes back to a specific moment, a BBQ at Frankie's, when Lily was nearly 20. She was walking past the pool, fully clothed and slipped in, a little yelp leaving her just before the splash. But before anyone could move, she was pushing to the surface, makeup sliding down her face and she was laughing, her head tilted back as she made her way to the edge and Frankie pulled her out. Her clothes were soaked, hair sticking to her forehead, mascara covering her cheeks along with the purple eye shadow she had been wearing. Most girls would've flipped out, cried and screamed and gotten angry, but not Lily. She made some quip about not seeing the pool there and then she looked at him as he laughed, her eyes lit up not with embarrassment, but something else that Benny couldn't quite place. But now he saw her in a whole new light. Lily. His Lily. 

Wait, not his Lily. She can't ever be his Lily because she is Lily Morales, Fish's daughter. He couldn't do that to his friend. 13 years isnt too bad of a gap but Fish's daughter? She's too smart for him, too creative, too good. She wouldn't want his old PTSD ass anyway. 

He watches her bring the drinks back and pass them out, her friends pounding them back as Lily takes small, infrequent sips from the glass she's holding, her smile dropping lower and lower as her friends get more and more drunk. 

God, she's beautiful. Her dark brown hair frames her face, loose waves cascading past her shoulders, her shirt hugging her tits the right way and Benny shifts in his seat as his mind wanders, eyes roaming over her body. She can't see him anyway, what would it hurt? 

But as the night continues on, he sees her friends get up, forming a makeshift dance floor, some other young college guys coming to join them. But not Lily. She doesn't join her friends, opting to stay back and take another slow sip from her drink, her fingers drawing a mindless pattern in the condensation on her cup. 

He takes a deep breath, drinking the last swig from his beer as he stands. He won't have her looking so sad on her birthday. He must put a smile on her face. Benny strides over to her, pushing through the crowd. 

"You look bored as fuck, Lil."

Her eyes go wide, her cheeks flushing as she looks up at him, a smile appearing on her face. Surely that's not just for him. She can't possibly feel the same way. Can she? No, she's Fish's daughter. Cut it out, Benny. 

But he can't stop himself from sliding into the seat next to her, hoping like hell she doesn't spot his half hard boner from her thigh barely touching his jean clad one. 

When he looks at her, he knows why other women haven't worked out for him. Because she is the one he wants. And the one he simply cannot have. 

—----

My body springs to life as his voice washes over me, my eyes looking up into his bright blue ones, the ones that I see in my dreams. My cheeks warm and it's not from the half a drink I've had. It's from the fact I've been in love with this man for years. 

"Benny!"

He smiles at me, his eyes crinkling slightly at the sides and my stomach lurches. He waves his hands, silently telling me to scooch over. I do and he sits next to me, his thigh nearly pressing into mine. He leans in close, speaking into my ear as the girls have turned the music up way too loud. 

"Happy birthday!"

"You remembered?"

He's so close, his face inches from mine, his eyes boring into me. "Of course I remember. You're one of my favorite people." 

God I hope he can't hear my heart pounding through my chest. 

"But why are you sitting here by yourself? Shouldn't you be out there?" He points his thumb over his shoulder towards my group of friends, who have now mingled with a group of college boys, all grinding on each other. 

"Hard pass."

"You mean, grinding up against sweaty young men isn't your thing?" His eyes light up with laughter.

I shake my head. "I like older men." Shit, did I just say that? He looks at me, a curious look in his eyes.

"I doubt they'd be able to keep up with you."

"I think one might."

"Sounds like you have someone in mind."

"Maybe I do." Shut up, Lily!

Before he can reply, a loud whoop sounds from the dancing throng and we both look as one of the drunk men try to impress my friend by doing the worm. Benny leans in to me again, his scent filling up my nose and suddenly I'm feeling warm between my legs. 

"I'm hungry. Wanna get out of here and get a burger or something?"

"God, yes. Please save me."

He smiles, sliding out of the booth and extends his arm to me as I get up. I take it, my skin tingling as it brushes against his, feeling his muscles constrict as he guides me through the crowd and out of the bar. I catch my friends eye as I walk past them and nod my head towards Benny, telling her silently I was going with him. She gives me a wink and thumbs up before making a lude gesture that I'm glad Benny misses. I expect him to drop my arm when we're outside, but he doesn't. Instead, he looks down at me, towering over me. 

"Did you drive or?"

"What? Oh, no. Ironically, I was not the designated driver. Don't worry, we took Ubers."

He chuckles. "Smart. Alright, my jeep is around the back. I've only had one beer, is that ok?"

"You're asking me?"

"Yeah. I mean, I'm fine to drive but whatever you're comfortable with."

"I trust you." Am I seeing things or is he blushing? 

He guides me to his jeep, opening the door and helping me inside. He drives us across town to a little diner we've been to before, although it's never been just the two of us. Usually my dad or Benny's brother Will is with us. We sit and order giant burgers and a plate of fries to share, and a couple slices of what Benny calls "birthday pie" that we eat first. 

"So why did you agree to go out with those friends if all they did was ditch you?"

I chuckle. "I blame my dad. He made me."

"Fish wanted you to go out drinking?"

"He said I should "go out and be 21". I told him I just wanted a pizza and a movie with him."

"Why didn't you tell me you wanted pizza? We could've gone to get pizza."

"No, this is perfect, really." My hand covers his on the table and I see just how small it is in comparison to Benny's and I swallow hard. "Thank you, really. You saved me."

Benny asks a zillion more questions as we eat, always interested to hear my opinion on things. I've never had a man be this interested in what I had to say, almost as if… there's no way he could feel the same for me, right? I know there's an age gap, but it's only 13 years..

He links his arm with mine again as we make our way back to his Jeep, helping me in before coming around and climbing in himself. 

"I'll take you home."

"No!" Oh shit, did I yell that? I don't want this night to end so soon. Not when I have an excuse for it to just be us.

His eyebrows are raised. "No?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to be loud. I uh.. I mean no. My dad expects me to be home late or crash at a friend's. If I come home now, he'll think it's weird."

"I don't think he'd mind you coming home early. Then he knows you're not out causing trouble."

"Please Benny?" I hesitate a moment before reaching out to place my hand on his arm, squeezing it a little. "Can we… I don't know.. just go back to your place and hang for a bit?" His skin is warm under my palm and I feel him shift slightly in his seat, eyes fixed on the road before he glances sideways at me.

“You’d really want to hang out with an old man like me?"

“You’re not old.” I sit back, reluctantly pulling my hand from his arm. “Besides, didn’t we establish that I like older men?” What the fuck is wrong with you, Lily?

He shifts in his seat again and clears his throat, fighting back a smile. “Have anything in mind?”

“We could watch a movie?”

“Alright, you talked me into it. But only because it’s your birthday.” He smiles before reaching over and poking me in the side. I flinch back, a giggle erupting from the back of my throat. “Oh, you’re ticklish?”

“I don’t like the look on your face, Benjamin.”

He’s smiling wide. “No look. Just tucking that information away for later.”

We pull up to his place and get out. I follow him up to his front door, my eyes taking in his broad shoulders, beefy arms, and tight ass. He's so tall, much taller than me. I'd love to climb him like a tree…

Heading inside, I kick my shoes off and leave them by the door, hanging my purse on one of the coat rack hooks. I follow him into the living area. He gestures to the couch and I sit, Benny sitting at the opposite end from me. 

"Want something to drink?" He asks and it may be my imagination, but he sounds nervous.

"S-sure." Way to sound smooth, Lily. 

"Beer ok? I think I have water somewhere."

"Beer will be fine. Thanks."

"You got it. Can't believe I can officially give you this now." He disappears into his kitchen and remerges with 2 bottles of beer, popping open the top and handing it to me. He holds up his bottle to mine and we clink them together. 

"Here's to a birthday!" He says and smiles, taking a swig when I do. 

"It's certainly been one of those."

We flip through the channels, stopping on some trash reality TV to make fun of them, cracking up at the stupidity of the show. We've had a couple of beers by now and I'm not drunk by any means, but definitely warm and I feel myself loosening up as I become more comfortable around him, passing quips back and forth.

"I don't know why she's picking Jason when clearly Porter is the better choice."

"What?" I say, shocked. "You can't mean that. Have you looked at Porter?"

Benny squints at the tv. "Yes?"

"Need your glasses, old man?" 

"Be careful. You don't wanna poke the old man."

I scoff playfully, smirking. "Maybe I do."

In one swift move, Benny sits up, putting his bottle on the coffee table before he turns to me, his eyes full of mischief. He lunges for me but I jumped up, somehow missing his grip and I smirk, turning towards him. 

"You'll have to be faster than that, old man." He tries to get up and I run, trying to move around the back of the couch, but somehow he's there, leaning over the back, his strong arms wrapped around me, pulling me back over the couch as I scream. He pushes me back down onto the couch, his large form hovering over me as his fingers dig into my sides. I squirm under him, unable to do anything but squeal with laughter as I writhe about. But the mood changes suddenly, his fingers slowing as he looks down at me, his blue eyes dragging down my face to my lips. I can feel him pressing into me between my legs and heat rushes there to meet him. He leans closer, our lips almost touching, but then he's pulling back and I can't take it. We were so close, I can't go back to how it was, not knowing that he wants this as much as I do but is stopping himself, denying him and me a chance at happiness. 

My fingers grasp at his shirt, tugging to get him to look at me. When he does, his eyes are wide, a combination of lust and conflict behind them. My finger traces his cheek and I decide to go for it, leaning up while lightly pulling him towards me with the tip of my finger. His lips are nearly on mine, his breath fanning out over my face, but he stops. 

"We can't, Lil."

I nod. "We can." I feel him grow harder against me and it's all I can do to not moan, the weight of him grounding me to this moment. He still doesn't move. 

"I don't want to take advantage."

"You're not. I'm sober."

His lips are so close to mine, his breath filling my own as my lips remain slightly parted waiting for him. 

"He'd kill me."

"I'll protect you."

"Lil," he whispers, his breath heating my lips.

"Ben." I touch my lips to his and oh, his are so soft and warm, tasting slightly like the beer he'd had earlier. He doesn't move for a second and maybe I've pushed him too far. His lips move above mine, responding to my gentle touch with a more heated one, a slight moan at the back of his throat as he glides his tongue into my slightly parted lips. A small groan comes from my chest in return and I hum into his kiss, deepening it as Benny presses on with more urgency, my legs wrapping around him, squeezing him slightly. 

His hands are on my face, pushing my hair out of it as a large hand engulfs the side of my face and neck, holding my chin in place as he kisses me deeper, pressing into me harder, his hips slightly grinding of their own accord. Then he breaks the kiss, leaning up to reach over his shoulder, gripping the back of his shirt as he pulls it over his head, tossing it on the coffee table. I've seen him shirtless before of course, but this is different. A patch of hair is nestled between his pecks, soft but strong muscles flexing as he holds himself up, a small trail of hair disappearing beneath his pants. Fuck do I want to see where that goes. I scramble to grip the bottom of my shirt, lifting slightly as I twist my body to take it off, Benny's hand coming to help. My shirt joins his, Benny's fingers sliding around my back to take off my bra, tossing that on the table too. His eyes dip to my chest and they look hungry. 

"Fuck, look at you, Lil." 

Before I can reply, he leans back down, pressing his chest to mine as he kisses me again, his warm skin so soft against mine. He feels so good, comforting, grounding, I can hardly believe I'm here. He kisses a path down my neck, pausing to suck one of my nipples in his mouth. I whimper, my back arching off the couch towards him, my fingers automatically coming up to tangle in his golden hair. 

"How do you want it?"

"Wh-what?" Is all I can manage as he starts to lick at my same nipple. 

"Do you have any favorite positions? Any you hate?"

"I don't know."

He chucks into my skin. "Should I give you a moment to think?"

I shake my head. "I really don't know. I've never done this before."

Benny drops my boob with a plop, pushing himself up so fast it makes my head spin. "What do you mean you haven't done this before?"

I know I'm blushing under his gaze. "I mean… I haven't.. I just… I've never…" I gesture between us.

"Be clear."

"I'm a virgin, ok?" I'm not that embarrassed, but everyone I know has had sex long before me. I just never felt the desire to. Probably because none of them was the man above me, who is now trying to untangle my legs from behind him. 

"I didn't know you were… didn't you have boyfriends?"

"Yeah but I've never done anything past boobs."

"Shit, Lil. I can't do this to you. I-"

"Do this to me?"

"Yeah, take your…" He gestures between my legs, still trying to wiggle his way out from between them. 

"I want you, though, Benny."

"I can't. Not when you haven't…you should do it with someone your age. You should've done it with a boyfriend-"

I let out a frustrated huff. "But none of them were you, Ben!"

He stops moving, his eyes studying my face. "What?"

Too late to not say anything now. "I.. ok, I've liked you for a really long time. Like, really liked you. I tried dating people my age but they all suck. None of them were you. I guess I've been waiting, hoping you'd feel the same. But I won't force-"

"You waited for me?"

I nod, suddenly unable to look at him, my cheeks on fire. "I hoped one day I'd have the courage to tell you how I felt. Or something. I knew it was a long shot. I mean, look at me. I'm… me."

His eyes soften, looking down my body and back up to my eyes. "You say that like it's a bad thing. You're fucking gorgeous, Lil. And..I'd be lying if I said I never thought about us. But me? Why would you want anything to do with me?"

I muster up the courage to look him in the eyes. "Because you make me feel seen. Like I matter. That I'm not just some piece of ass."

"I've been through some major shit, Lil."

I reach up, my hand caressing his cheek, fingers scratching at the stubble. "I want that too. I want all of you, Benny. I want you."

His lips press to mine again, urgent, desperate, his large hand pressed on the side of my neck, the other bracing him. He breaks the kiss for just a moment, pulling back enough to make sure I'm looking at him. 

"Are you sure, Lil? This isn't a small thing, even if you weren't a virgin."

"I am so unbelievably sure, Benny. Please just, show me. Make me feel good."

He smiles at me, his eyes darkening with a glint. “I’m about to ruin you for other men, sweetheart. But not here."

My brows furrow together. "What?"

He taps my thigh to get me to unlock my legs. I do and he stands, stretching briefly before he extends a hand to me, helping me up off the couch. He tips my head up, hooking my chin with his finger, pressing his lips to mine, his other hand coming up to lightly pinch my nipple. I gasp at the sensation, arching slightly into his palm. Then he stands straight, holding his hand out to me, giving me one last chance to stop things. I lace my fingers with his, my hand feeling small in his large one and he smiles, walking me down the hallway to his bedroom.

Once inside, he pushes some things out of the way, and sits on the edge of the bed. He beckons me over and I stand between his outstretched legs. He pulls one of my boobs in his mouth and I moan, heat and wet pooling between my thighs as he kisses his way down to my skirt line. He pauses, eyes turned up to mine, as his hand gently glides up my inner thigh, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind it. Once he reaches my panties, he stops, barely brushing a finger over my clothed clit and I jolt, pleasure momentarily shooting out from where he touched me. 

"You're so fucking wet," he says with awe.

"Is..is that a good thing?"

He touches me again, grinning when I gasp out loud. "Such a good thing."

He pulls his hand from under my skirt, hooking his fingers into the waistband and pulls them down slowly, kissing the skin that appears as my skirt and panties slide down my legs. I kick them off, foot shoving them somewhere behind me as I stand there, completely bare in front of him. I'm nervous, hands automatically coming up to cover me, but he grips my wrists, holding them apart as his eyes slowly move over my body. 

"So fucking beautiful, Lil."

He switches places with me and tells me to lay back, scooting up the bed. He kicks off his pants but leaves his boxers on, which do nothing to hide the tent in his pants. My eyes grow wide. Are all men that large? He crawls over my body, slotting himself between my legs, kissing me deeply for several minutes. My legs wrap around him, feeling him hot and heavy against me. But then he's kissing a path down my body, scooting lower and lower until he's level with my pussy, pushing my legs apart further and putting his broad shoulders between them to hold them apart. 

"Fuck, you have a pretty little pussy. Can't believe no one has touched you here."

I don't respond, my head swimming with a whirl of emotions, mostly nerves and how bad I want him to touch me, push himself inside of me. I want-

"Oh!" A cry erupts from me, my thighs clamping around the side of Benny's head as his tongue makes contact with me, licking a line up me before he taps at my clit. "Oh, God, Benny!" My fingers tangle in his hair, tugging on him and holding him in place as he laps at me, gliding his nose up my seam before I feel him press a finger to my entrance, rubbing small circles there. I can hear how wet I am, my other hand flying out to grip the sheets as he pushes his finger in slowly. 

"Fuck you are so tight, Lil."

He slowly moves his finger in and out of me, my body warming quickly before he adds a second finger, this time tapping around inside of me. He hits some spot and I yell, thighs banging against his head again.

"There it is," he smirks, his fingers rubbing and tapping at that spot as his mouth returns to my pussy, licking and sucking. I feel tingles, all over my body, racing towards where he's touching me and then I explode, my head pushing into the bed, thighs tensing as I pulse around him, whining and moaning as I come. Benny guides me through it, making sure I feel every ounce of pleasure I possibly can.

And then he does it two more times. 

My entire body is warm and loose, my brain swimming with the pleasure of it all as Benny removes his mouth from me, wiping his face on the back of his hand, grinning ear to ear as he hovers over me, tasting of me as he presses his lips to mine. 

"You feelin' good, sweetheart?"

"Mmhmm."

Benny chuckles. "Do you want me to stop?"

My eyes fly open as I find his. "No. Please I need you inside of me."

He nods. "I think you're ready for me. But stop me if it hurts or you want me to stop, ok?"

"Ok."

He scoots back off the bed, standing and pulling his boxers off. He springs up and holy shit is that supposed to go in me? He settles between my legs, pushing my thighs apart, sliding himself through my soaked folds and I whimper at his touch. He's heavy at my entrance, his eyes on my face as he slowly pushes in. 

"Oh!" Is about all I can say. It burns for sure, and is uncomfortable, but not painful. And as he pushes further in, I feel him rub up against that spot he made sensitive with his fingers moments before. My fingers dig into his biceps, his muscles strong beneath my nails as he slowly slides back out. 

“Are you ok?” He asks, his eyebrows pulled together in concern. 

“I will be once you’re back inside of me.”

“Fuck you’re gonna kill me.” 

He pushes back into me, still slowly but a little faster this time. When he can go no further, he waits, holding his hips still to give me a moment. I feel so full of him, my head swimming with his scent while I relax and stretch around him. He must feel the tension leaving me, as he pulls back out and pushes back in, more quickly. After about 5 more of these, he pushes in rather quick and I yelp as he hits a spot at the back of me. 

“Fuck! Do that again!”

He smiles, one side of his mouth pulling up as he complies, thrusting into me harder and chuckling when he hears the breathy sounds coming from me. He keeps going, making sure to angle himself to thrust into that spot every time, eventually speeding up more, rutting into me as I come unglued beneath him, writhing and moving my hips to meet his, my vision going hazy at the edges as my body tingles and I come, nails digging into him as I chant his name over and over. Benny grunts and pulls out, spilling himself across my lower stomach, little breathy grunts coming from him as he comes. 

He takes a second when he’s done before getting up and grabbing a wet cloth from the bathroom. He cleans me up and returns with another cloth, wiping my overstimulated cunt, and chuckling when my legs twitch. He tosses the rag in his hamper and crawls on the bed next to me, pulling the sheet over us. Benny props himself up on his elbow, his finger tracing lines down my chest before using a finger to turn my head to him. 

“How are you feeling, Lil?”

I sigh, feeling the corners of my mouth pull into a soft smile. “Honestly? I’ve never felt better.”

He presses his lips lightly to mine. “The best you’ve ever felt, huh?”

I nod, turning on my side to face him. “You were right though. You’ve ruined other men for me. Good thing I only want one man.”

—----

A yell rips me from sleep and I sit up quick, my head rushing slightly as I look around the unfamiliar room, blinking a few times before remembering I was still at Benny’s. In his bed. A whimper echoes in the dark space and I look down, seeing Benny tangled in his sheets, curled up and sweating, eyes jammed shut and his mouth muttering words I can’t catch all of. I may have never seen it on Benny, but I am familiar with the nightmares. My dad has them all the time, one of the many reasons why I’m studying to be a psychiatrist and intend to reform the VA mental health unit. 

I gently place my hand on his bare shoulder, his skin warm and sweaty under my palm. “Benny, it’s ok. You’re here. I’m here.”

He whimpers once more before his eyes pop open, wet with unshed tears and he gasps, hand reaching out for something I can’t see. He blinks and turns his head, seeing my hand on his shoulder and he follows it up to my face.

“Lily?”

I smile. “Hey, Ben. Are you with me?”

“I…” he pulls his shoulder from me and sits up, pulling the blankets around his waist. “I’m sorry.” He’s wiping at his face, trying to push the tears away. “Just lock the door on your way out.”

“What?”

“When you leave, just take the key and lock the door. Slide it under the mat.”

“I don’t…I don’t understand? You’re kicking me out?”

“You want to leave, right?”

“No? Why would I?”

“Because I’m fucked up! I told you, Lil. I have so much shit with me. No one wants this.” 

“Ben. Look at me.”

He shakes his head. "I can't. Just.. lock the door on your way out."

"Ben-"

"I can't. I can't see that look on your face too, I just can't, Lily."

"Ben, please look at me." 

He sighs and turns his head, a hard expression on his face and I see it, all the hurt he’s had to endure from the women before me leaving him once his guard slipped. And I want to fight them all. I take his hand, lacing my fingers through his and bring it to my lips, pressing a kiss to the back of his hand. 

“Benjamin Miller, unless you kick me out, I’m not going anywhere.”

His eyes water a little and he shakes his head to stop them. “But, the nightmares-”

“You think this is the first time I’ve seen a nightmare? Do you not remember who my dad is?”

“Fish gets nightmares too?”

I nod. “All the fucking time, Ben. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve talked him down. Why do you think I’m going into psych?”

“You’re…you’re really not wanting to leave?”

“No. I’d really rather stay here with you, make sure you’re ok, wake up next to you. As long as you’ll have me?”

He squeezes my hand and presses his forehead to mine. “I’d love that.”

I lay back and beckon him to me, placing his head on my chest as he cuddles into my side. He sucks one of my boobs in his mouth, claiming it’s his comfort toy. But soon after he’s sound asleep, his face peaceful and he doesn’t wake the rest of the night.

He brings me home the next day and I wave to him from the front steps as I walk through the front door. 

“She’s alive!”

“Ha-ha, dad. But I’m doing fine.”

“Was that Benny I saw dropping you off?”

“Oh. Yeah. He was at the bar last night.”

“And he brought you home this morning?”

I nod, kicking off my shoes. “Yeah. I was pretty drunk and my friends still wanted to party. His place was closest to the bar and I asked him to take me there. Didn’t think I could make it home.” I mimed throwing up, which is exactly what I wanted to do. I hate lying to him. 

“You could’ve called me. I would’ve picked you up.”

“I know. But Benny was already there. No sense in waking you up.”

“You know I don’t sleep.”

“Which is why you’re always so fun to be around.”

He looks fake hurt, pressing his hand to his chest. “I am a damn delight….but I’ll have to thank Benny for taking such good care of you.”

I hide my smirk before replying. “Please do.”

—----

The next few months pass and we keep us a secret, going on dates in the next towns over, meeting up whenever we can. I feel bad for lying to my dad and not telling him, but it’s not the right time. 

Benny is everything I thought he was and more. He makes me laugh, even cracking jokes as he’s pressed between my thighs. He makes me feel safe and I think I make him feel safer too. His nightmares, while still present, seem to happen less often, his body relaxing into mine as he sleeps deeply. 

Then there’s the sex. Oh God the sex. I know I have nothing to compare it to, but the way my friends talk about it, it seems like it’s often a chore. They talk about faking orgasms or men that are only concerned about themselves. Not Benny. He says he loves the sounds I make as he pulls orgasm after orgasm out of me, pressing his body against and into mine against every surface of his house and his jeep, anywhere we can get away with it.  

About 6 months in, it’s our turn to host the monthly BBQ for all the boys. Will usually brings his wife and kids, Santi just himself, and Tom brings his family, so it’s a pretty big to do. I remember at BBQ’s in the past, sometimes Benny would show up with some girl and how jealous I was of her. And this time, I’m still jealous, because they got to be with him in the open. No passing touches or whispers, no hiding glances or anything. But I’m feeling bold, so I put on my favorite sundress, the one Benny had hitched up around my hips as he bent me over his kitchen table the last time we were together. And judging by the look on his face, he too has this same memory when he sees me in the dress. 

Everyone is outside, the kids screaming and running around, everyone else chatting, keeping an eye on the kids as my dad starts grilling. I feel Benny’s eyes on me as I set a few bowls of chips on the table, bending over just a little more than normal to expose more of my cleavage to him. I glance up at him and wink, turning and heading back into the house. I hear him come in behind me a couple minutes later, his eyes on me standing in the doorway to the hall. He silently follows me upstairs to my room, closing the door behind us and locking it before taking 2 steps towards me, pulling me to him and kissing me deeply. His hands fist in the sides of my dress, pulling it up higher on my hips. 

“You think you’re so slick wearing this dress?”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“You know exactly what I mean.”

I pull him down on me, parting my thighs to let him settle between them as my back settles into my bed. My fingers twist in his hair, his hand trailing up my bare thigh as I whimper in his ear. 

“Wanna fuck in my bed. We haven’t done that yet.”

“Your dad’s outside.”

“So?”

“So what if he hears us?”

“I’ll deal with that then. Please fuck me Benny. I need you to fuck me.”

And so he does, pushing my panties aside and thrusting into me, one hand clamped over my mouth. I try to push him into me more, my hands gripping his ass, digging little marks into it when I come, legs spasming as Benny’s moans come right after, his hips rutting into mine as he fills me up. 

“Let me get something to clean you up with.”

“Don’t. I want to feel you inside me.”

“Fuckin’ hell you’re gonna kill me.”

—----

My chest heaves as Benny rolls off me and lays on his side, trying to catch his own breath. He slides his hand across my body and gently squeezes one of my boobs, his thumb grazing over my nipple. 

“You can’t possibly want to go again?” I ask, eyebrows raised. 

“What? This is my emotional support tiddy.”

Laughter erupts from me and Benny joins in, his smile making me feel warm all over. This is nice, this is comfortable. Benny makes everything in my life good. 

“You hungry? We did miss our dinner reservations.”

I chuckle. “Totally worth missing them.”

Benny props himself up on his elbow, his hand leaving my boob to start sliding down my bare stomach. “Oh I agre-”

GROWL! 

My stomach has decided enough is enough and the sound it makes is loud in the quiet room. Benny laughs again, his head flying back with it before he brings his lips to my stomach, speaking to it.

“You hungry, girl? Should we get some food in ya?”

I ruffle his hair and he turns, his cheek resting on my stomach as his eyes meet mine. We stare at each other for a few moments before he chuckles. “Your stomach is so loud.”

“Ok, fine. I’m hungry,” I smile.

He sits up, giving me a quick kiss before rolling off the bed. “I’ll go make us something. You can shower if you’d like. I’ll let you know when it’s ready.” He leaves the room, sliding some pants on before he does. I make my way to his bathroom across the hall and take in my appearance, fixing my hair so it’s not too wild before sliding one of his shirts on. I make my way down the hall and stand in the entrance to the kitchen, watching Benny move about the kitchen, no shirt and sweatpants hanging low on his hips. He tosses a kitchen towel over his shoulder as he flips a pancake, one of his specialties, humming to himself as he does. His hair is sticking up at all angles, looking like he’d just rolled around in bed for hours. Which I guess, technically, he did. I walk up behind him and wrap my arms around his waist, kissing his back before resting my cheek against it. 

“You want strawberries or chocolate chips in yours, Lil?”

“Do I have to pick?”

He pauses for a moment. “Shit, why did I never think to combine those?” He adds both cut up strawberries and chocolate chips to his mix, pouring out another round of batter on the griddle. “I may have to steal one.”

“I’ll fight you for it.”

He slides the pancake off the spatula and spins, gripping my wrists before I can move. “I’d like to see- are you in my shirt?”

“Mmhmm.”

He drops my wrists and slides his hands around my hips, feeling for something. “Are you..are you not wearing any underwear?”

“How else am I supposed to feel you dripping down my legs?” Benny groans, gripping my jaw and pulling me in for a heated kiss, but the sound of a key jiggling in his front door lock kills the mood. In one quick motion, Benny is shoving me back through the doorway and down the hall, motioning for me to hide. I step into his room and close the door almost all the way just as the front door opens. 

“Hey, Ben.”

“Hey..Fish.”

The door closes and I feel the color drain from my face. My dad is here and almost walked in on us fucking in the kitchen. 

“Hope it’s ok I used my key? Normally you complain about having to get up and open the door.”

“No, no that’s fine. What, uh, what are you doing here?”

“Lil is at her friend’s studying this weekend so I thought we could watch the fight?”

“The fight?”

There’s a slight pause. “The big fight? Between Samson and Jueng?”

“Oh right. The fight. Yeah, I think the neighbors in 2B are having some kind of party.”

“That explains why the parking lot is slammed.”

“Yeah, yeah. Hey listen, Frankie, I uh…I’m a little…” There’s a pause where Benny fumbles for words. 

“Oh shit, I should’ve called, Ben. I just got bored and I remembered you said you were staying in this weekend. Thought we could hang.”

“No, no. It’s uh, it’s ok. Did..did you want some pancakes?”

“For dinner?”

“I already made some.”

“Sure, sounds good. Bathroom useable?”

“It’s clean, fucker.”

Dad’s chuckle gets closer and I step away from the crack in the bedroom door, like he could see me through it. When I hear the bathroom door close, I yank on some pants and grab my shoes, tiptoe running down the hall and meet Benny at the door. 

“I’ll let you know when he leaves.”

I nod. “Sounds good. I still want pancakes.”

“Ok ok but you have to go now,” He’s practically pushing me out of the door, but just before it closes, he reaches out and grabs my arm, pulling me back and kissing me before letting me go, a smile as the door closes and I hear my dad’s voice coming back down the hall.  

That was close.

—----

Several weeks later, I decided to grab some dinner on my way to Benny’s, neither of us feeling much like cooking. I wait at the counter of the diner, studying the pie menu while our burgers cook. It’s hard to pick out pie for Benny because he loves them all. Even Rhubarb. I decide on a slice of apple and a slice of buttermilk pie, placing the order with the waitress.

“No pecan?”

I jump, my head jerking to look at my dad, leaning against the counter, menu in hand and looking at me. 

“Pecan?”

“You’re favorite?”

“Oh. Yeah I thought I’d try something new.”

He nods. “So, you weren’t going to tell your old man you were getting shitty food before coming home?”

“You’re here too.”

He laughs. “True.” His eyebrows furrow together as the waitress brings 2 large bags and reads off the order. I try to cut her off but she plows through, smiling at the end. 

“Anything else, dear?”

“N-no. I’m good.” She walks off and I can feel my dad’s eyes on me. 

“Hungry?”

“What?”

He nods towards the bags. “There’s enough food there for two. Especially with that last burger. Double cheese, double bacon, and extra pickles? That’s exactly what Benny orders so I know it’s entirely too much.”

I laugh nervously. “Uh yeah. That’s..that’s mine. Period.” He looks at me, understanding. 

“And the other burger?”

“Uh surprise! I was going to bring food home.”

He smiles and I feel terrible. “We must have been thinking the same thing. Thanks, mija. Need some help?”

“Sure.”

He takes the burger bag and I take the other, walking me over to my car. He waits for me to get in and hands me the bag. 

“See you at home!” 

When he’s turned away and solidly heading to his truck, I pull out my phone and send a quick text to Benny. 

Me: No burgers tonight. Dad came in. Had to tell him I was buying for us.

Benny Baby: Oh shit! Did he know?

Me: He recognized your order but nothing past that. I’m sorry! Can I come tomorrow?

Benny Baby: Oh I plan on making you come many times 

—----

It was a couple weeks before we could manage to see each other again and we wasted no time in making up for it. Benny pressed himself between my thighs over and over, pulling as many sounds from me as he could before I just couldn’t take anymore, completely over stimulated. Only then did we get dressed and head out to dinner across town, his arm wrapped around my shoulders as we walked into my favorite Italian restaurant, laughing and sharing breadstick puns as we waited for our food. After force feeding ourselves some dessert, we walked back around the building, Benny pushing me against the side of his jeep, slotting his leg between my thighs as he pushes his tongue in my mouth, my hands fisting in his shirt. I can feel him getting harder against me and I wonder how unoccupied this parking lot is or if I even care. 

“I thought that was you. You got a secret girlfriend?”

Benny freezes at his brother’s voice, pulling back slowly and looking into my eyes, fear and apologies swirling around in his baby blues. He tries his best to turn around without showing me, but the angle is weird and he can’t quite hide all of me, no matter how I try to angle myself. 

“Wait…Lily?” Will says, completely shocked. 

I sigh, stepping out from behind Benny. “It’s me.”

He’s not smiling, gripping the takeout bag he has in his hand a little tighter as he looks at Benny. “That’s Fish’s daughter, Ben.”

“I fuckin’ know, Will. Don’t you think I know?”

“You’re making out with Fish’s daughter. His daughter.” 

“Yeah. And you’re not gonna tell him.”

“Why the fuck shouldn’t I? You shouldn’t be fucking around - shit, are you fucking around with her?”

I feel Benny’s body tense and I gently lace my fingers through his, a motion that doesn’t go unnoticed by Will. 

“That’s Lily, Ben! You shouldn’t be…I gotta call Fish.”

Before he can move, I step in front of Benny and grip Will’s arm gently. He looks down at me, his grey blue eyes studying me as if he’s trying to see if I’ve been coerced. 

“Please don’t, Will. I promise we will tell him. Eventually.”

“Tell him what, exactly?”

I glance back at Benny, giving him a small smile before looking back at Will. “We’re together. I am the secret girlfriend and the reason he hasn’t been around as much.”

Will looks from me to Benny and back. “He put you up to this?”

“Hey fuck you, man!”

I put my hand up, touching Benny’s chest. “No. If anything, I convinced him.”

“You’re Fish’s daughter, Lil.”

“I’m aware.”

“One of our best friend’s daughters.”

“That’s me.”

“I don’t know, I…”

“Will… please? I promise we will tell him. We’ve just…been enjoying each other and seeing where this takes us.”

He cocks his head slightly. “So it’s really not just sex?”

I shake my head. “No.”

He looks between us again, looking like he’s doing some mental math. “Alright but only for you, Lil. Benny knows better. But you have to promise you’re gonna tell him.”

I nod. “Yes, of course. Thank you, Will.” I give him a hug and he returns it with one arm, the other still holding a heavy bag of take out. His eyes never leave Benny’s and I watch as they grow hard. 

“I love you, Ben. But if you hurt her, I’m not gonna hold back Fish.”

Benny nods. “That’s fair.”

—----

I love him. He tried telling me I’d grow out of him, but I didn’t. If anything I fell more in love with him as time went on. Benny let his final walls down, telling me how much he loves me, how I accept him, all of him, and how he thought he’d never find that. I don’t know how we made it 8 months without telling anyone or anyone figuring it out, aside from Will. 

It wasn’t until my dad came home early, finding Benny and me making out on the couch that I remembered why we were keeping it a secret. Thank God he didn’t come home 2 minutes later. 

“What the fuck is this?” He slams the door behind him, the walls rattling and Benny and I spring apart, Benny jumping up as my dad storms towards him. “SHE’S MY DAUGHTER, BEN!” 

Benny has his hands out in a placating manner. “I know, but-”

“My daughter! She is not for you!”

“No, but-”

Anger rises up from my chest. “You have no say over who I get with!”

He looks at me, his dark eyes fuming. “I do when it’s my best friend and my daughter! You’re only 21, Lily!”

“So? I am not some thing you can pass around! My life is my own! I can date and fuck whomever I want!”

His eyes go wide, cheeks flushing with built up anger as he turns his rage towards Benny. “Wait…have you slept with her?”

“Wh-what?”

His voice raises, loud enough I know the neighbors are listening in. “Have you fucked my daughter, Ben?”

The color drains from Benny’s face. “Let’s talk about thi-”

BAM! My dad’s fist collides with Benny’s face, his head flying back. Luckily, Benny knows how to take a punch, thanks to his days as an MMA fighter. He straightens up, dodging the next swing from my dad, his hands still up trying to placate him. 

“Dad!” I push past him and stand in front of Benny, turning his face towards me to inspect his lip, which is now bleeding, a dark circle starting to appear under his eye. I round on my dad.

“What the fuck dad?”

“Don’t dad me! You’ve been lying to me for months! Sleeping with Benny? He’s my best friend, Lily!”

“I know, but-”

“You just never stop to think about the consequences. What did you think was gonna happen? He’s 13 years older than you!”

“Yes, but-”

“He’s done some shit, but putting his hands on my daughter is the thing I’m gonna kill him for.”

“Ok, dad. Kitchen. Now. Benny? First aid kit in the bathroom.” I push on my dad’s chest, willing him to move. He glares over my shoulder at Benny as he moves into the kitchen, but doesn’t sit. 

“What the fuck, Lily?”

“I know, but let me explain.”

“Benny?”

“I love him, dad.”

He pinches the bridge of his nose, his other hand on his hip in his typical dad pose. “I know you think you love him mija, but it’s just infatuation. You’re young.”

“Do you remember a few years ago, you asked me why I had boyfriends but none of them seemed to stick? And I told you I didn’t like them or want any of them?”

He thinks for a moment. “Yeah.”

“What did I say after that?”

“I said maybe you haven’t found the right person and you said no it’s because…” I raise my eyebrows at him until he continues. “...because you were in love with someone else.”

“You told me to go for it and I said I couldn’t because there’s no way he likes me the same way and it would be complicated.”

His shoulders slump, a little bit of the anger seeping from him. “Benny?”

“Benny.”

“How do you know he feels the same way?”

“Didn’t you tell me a few months ago how good he looks? That he said he was seeing someone but wasn’t ready to bring her around everyone yet? But that he hasn’t looked this happy in the entire time you’ve known him?”

“Fuck. It was you?”

“Me. We love each other, dad. We have for years, but didn’t say it until my birthday.”

“Wait. You told me Benny let you stay over because you were drunk. Did he-”

“No. I barely drank. My friends ditched me and he saw me. We went for dinner and then back to his place where..confessions were made.”

“You lied to me?”

“You didn’t ask me if I slept with him, dad.”

“Dammit. I hate when you’re right.” 

“Are…are we going to be ok?”

He pulls me to him in a bear hug, kissing the top of my head. “I’ll always love you, mija. But your boyfriend I may have to warm up to. God that feels weird to say.”

Benny pokes his head around the corner. “Is it safe?”

Dad turns his head to him, hugging me tighter. “I haven’t decided if I want to kill you yet.”

“Well while you’re deciding, can I just say how much I love her? She’s smart and funny, and she makes the world bright again. She’s the best thing to ever happen to me.”

“You’re damn right she is. So what if I told you I don’t want you dating her?”

“Dad-”

“Sshh. I’m asking him.”

“With all due respect, Fish. I’d tell you to go fuck yourself and date her anyway. I love you, you’re my best friend, but she’s the one for me and I won’t let anything come between us unless she wants it to.”

He lets me go and stomps up to Benny, who is a few inches taller than him. He glares up at him for a few moments before extending his hand out. 

“Ok.”

“Ok?"

“Just do me a favor and don’t kiss in front of me?”

“Deal.”

“Speak for yourself, Ben. I plan on making out with you whenever I can.”

A year later we’re married, both of us eternally grateful for my friends ditching me on my birthday that night.

—----

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[reveluving]

drown in your body ; rick flag x reader (ft benny miller)

summary: Benny knows he can only appreciate you from afar for so long, and despite his biggest threats, specifically, your husband and Benny’s own questionable morals, he can’t help but take a quick peek.

warnings: smut (minors DNI!), possessive af!Rick vs pervy af!Benny (whew)

a/n: everyone say tq to drown by Baekhyun because I was able to conclude the year by choosing violence and write this piece about Rick blowing your back, from the pov our fav menace <3 don’t forget to leave some sugar! ᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟ

» j.k. m.list (series under 'rick flag vs the triple frontier boys'), or check out my full m.list!

» smut includes; unprotected & kinda rough sex, spanking, voyeurism, dirty talking, possessive & kinky Rick vs pervy & kinky Benny 🧎🏻‍♀️, kinda dark but not really?? they just really kinky fr fr

'Then again, what's the harm in just a quick peek and run, right?' ;

Benny knew he had reached a different kind of low just by doing this.

He didn't mean to, at first.

All he tried to do was pass you the mail that had been mistakenly sent to their house. The package looked pretty important, judging by the sheer size of it, so he thought to give it to you directly rather than leaving it on your porch.

He knocked, and knocked, and knocked, but no one answered. Not you, not Rick, not even the cat that loves to visit your house every other day. He had no reason to try and turn the doorknob, but he definitely wasn't expecting it to be unlocked. Whether his reason for trespassing had anything to do with stubbornness or worry, the latter because he feared something had happened to you, was uncertain, but the package in his hands was no longer his priority at the moment.

No, it was the distant moan coming from upstairs.

It should've been his cue to scram, to pray that you or Rick had forgotten about whether or not one of you brought the mail in, to control his sick curiousity and avoid getting killed.

Literally.

But, oh, those noises were so tempting, so melodious, so needy. He only realized his feet were moving on their own when he reached the bottom of the stairs. He didn't move for a hot minute, mentally arguing with his inner demons for being so depraved for you the way he is. Or maybe, it was the fact that he could hear Rick's grunts in between your yelps.

Will would have his head for this.

But, who's to say Santi and Frankie wouldn't do the same either?

Then again, what's the harm in just a quick peek and run, right?

Well, everything. He could be dead on the spot.

He's seen the displays of affection you two have for each other, Rick doing so to spite the group as well but as much as Benny hated to admit it, he could see the true love both of you shared. He was grateful you found happiness just as he was disheartened that that happiness wasn't him.

But, as long as your husband was treating you well, then why should he complain? And judging by the sounds you're making upstairs, he definitely was.

He sighed, knowing he was a lost cause when he slowly ascended the stairs, testing any parts of the thread that could give him away with unnecessary creaks. He even held onto the handrails like a lifeline, but

The sight in the hallway brought him to a halt— eyeing the dress that lay on the floor slowly filled him with anticipation. Rick's suit jacket was barely hanging on the console table but what caught his eyes was the flimsy material peeking out of the pocket.

Your lacey panties.

Oh, Benny knew he was done for.

He quickly tried to navigate the room before he could even think about the idea of snatching for future use, his only guide was the noises coming from the bedroom, which was at the other end of the floor. Benny had no one to blame but himself, giving in to his curiousity and investigating like an airheaded character in a horror movie.

The closer he got to the door, the smaller his steps became, fearing that one bold movie would give his position away and have his funeral right then and there. And yet, his possible fate didn't steer him from his goal, his cock growing harder since his less-than-welcomed arrival.

And lo and behold, he reached the jackpot. His heart was racing faster than he thought was healthy, but just as he was thinking with his dick, he peeked. Despite the pep talks he gave himself, he could've given himself away when he nearly choked at the sight he was blessed with.

With your face nuzzling the blankets and ass up, Rick relentlessly thrust his hips into yours. He threw his head back, sliding his hand up and down the perfect curve of your spine before smacking your pretty ass. Hard. Each spank he presented drew little yelps out of you, the man above towering over you chuckling darkly every time you did.

Oh, what he wouldn't do to have you underneath him.

The dazed look on your face as you bite into the sheets was hypnotizing. Those sweet red lips that he wants to both kiss and see wrapped around his cock. Just as Benny began palming his cock over his sweatpants, he then noticed your bounded hands, the silky royal blue material was likely Rick's tie. He patted himself on the back, his speculation of you and Rick celebrating what was likely your anniversary was brief when his attention reverted back to your fists, flexing helplessly as Rick picked up the pace.

And to think he once found you intimidating. But just like the first time he met you all those years ago, he still found you very, very hot.

"Rick..!" His name and whatever incoherent nonsense you were trying to tell him were all you could say, as if your brain had into mush, which, frankly, it had. He cooed almost condescendingly dipping his head next to yours. Though his wet hair gave Benny little to know information about what he was whispering about but judging by your little whimpers, it was probably just as obscene as the sounds of his hips slamming against yours.

"Fuck," He growled, snapping his hips when you bucked yours, "You know exactly what you're doing to me, clenching on my cock like that. Dirty girl, aren't ya?"

"I-I am!" You whined, releasing the sheets out of your lips with the lewdest expression Benny's ever seen, "Y-Your dirty girl!"

Fuck.

To have you react in such a way, to be the one to pull himself back just enough to surprise you when he trusts back into you, feeling those tight walls flex around him.

That wet pussy of yours was practically calling him in like a siren.

He could imagine how soaked you were. He’d go as far as licking the sheets if he had to. All for just a taste. Fucker probably gets to taste you every day, Benny thought with great displeasure, and who was he kidding, he probably did.

Benny bit down on the collar of his shirt at the same time your pitch grew higher. He wanted to scream—he couldn’t groan in your ears the way he wanted to, he couldn’t cum all over your beautiful body the way he needed, and he most certainly couldn’t have you the way he yearned for. He couldn’t get too lost in the moment and yet, he was glued to the spot. You were close, and so was Benny, and he knew he couldn’t stay for long. No, it was too risky to stay till the very end.

Just as he questioned his chances yet again, something, or rather, someone threw all of his thoughts out of the window.

“Ain’t she a sight for sore eyes?”

Benny stilled, the heartbeat in his ears was suddenly the loudest it's ever been. He should’ve just run, but being the typical stubborn man he was, he slowly looked back, seeing not just Rick, but you look up at the half-opened door. Through your tears of pleasure, you stared back at the man with wide eyes, but your husband, on the other hand, looked like he was ready to commit a murder, like a bull seeing red and wanted nothing more than to hunt the poor fuckers down. You gasped, teeth grazing the sensitive part of your shoulder before angling his thrusts, effortlessly hitting your sweet spot.

"Better close the door on your way out, kid."

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

» gorgeous rose divider by the amazing @firefly-graphics ♡

#— reve's reverie 🌹 #rick flag x reader #rick flag x f!reader #rick flag x you #colonel rick flag #rick flag #joel kinnaman #benny miller x reader #benny miller x f!reader #benny miller x female reader #benny miller x you #benny miller #garrett hedlund #tss #tss 2021 #triple frontier #triple frontier benny miller #triple frontier x reader #rick flag vs the triple frontier boys

[avastrasposts]

The Pilot and his Girl - ch. 27

First of all: look at this beautiful banner @i-own-loki made for my fic! It's amazing, I love it and she is my saviour since I cannot figure out Canva! I'm going to go back and update all the previous posts so this will now be the official fic banner.

Also, chapter 27! I've been looking forward to this one for a while and I hope you enjoy!

Series Master List

Chapter 28 - Warnings have their own post - Word count: 10k

Half the morning passes before you stir, only moving because Frankie slips away to the bathroom. When he comes back you stretch, yawning widely as he wraps around you, his hand running down your side. 

“I woke up wondering if I’d dreamt that Will was back,” he mumbles, “I can’t believe you found him, couldn’t fucking believe my eyes last night.” 

“Imagine my face when I saw him, they put a hood over my head and Will pulled it off, he’d recognized my voice and I was just dumbstruck, started crying straight away.” 

“You’re in good company, I’ve never seen Benny that emotional before, except,” he hesitates “except with Hannah, at the end.” 

“That was hard, telling Will about Hannah,” you sigh,” I wonder if Benny told him the whole story, all the details, or if maybe he wants to spare him that? I’m not sure I’d wanna know, it can’t be changed.” 

“I’d wanna know,” Frankie says, shifting in bed so that he can look at you, “It would fuck me up, but I’d wanna know anyway.” 

You shudder, shaking the thoughts off you, “I don’t wanna think about it, I’m happy Will is back, I wanna leave it at that.” You go to push yourself off the bed but Frankie grabs hold of you, his hand behind your neck, and pulls you down to his lips in a hard kiss. There’s an edge of desperation in the way he grips your neck and holds you close to his mouth while his tongue licks into you, all teeth and urgency.  

“Yesterday, before you came back,” he says, pulling back a little so that he can look at you, his eyes almost black, “I imagined what I’d do to them if they got even close to doing what Myers did to Hannah. I’d wanna know every detail, because I would do a hundred times worse to them.” His tone is rigid, harsher than you’ve heard from him before, and the intensity behind his words makes you frightened, not for you, but for him. 

“Don’t go down that route, Frankie, please,” you say, taking hold of his hand, “don’t even think about it, it’s not a good head space to be in.” 

“I can’t help it, the thought of that happening to you…” he trails off, you feel his fingers flexing around the back of your neck, “I just wanna fucking make them-” 

“Stop, Frankie,” you cut him off, “I don’t want you thinking about it, and if anything was to happen to me, I don’t want you doing anything,” you take his hand from behind your neck, putting the other one on his cheek. “If I go missing, come find me, please, tear the world apart if you have to, I’ll do the same for you. But don’t lose yourself to revenge, I don’t want that for you.” Frankie’s eyes soften at your words as you run your thumb over his cheek, “You’ll break my heart if you let hatred take over, I want you to be my sweet Frankie, even if I’m not here.” 

“Please don’t talk about not being here,” he says, his voice thick, “that thought fucking kills me, that’s what scares me more than anything.” 

“Being without you scares me the most too, Frankie, but promise you won’t wreck yourself trying to get revenge if something happens to me.” 

He takes in your worried face, your eyes searching his for assurance. The very thought of someone hurting you, or worse, makes his heart stutter, his first instinct is to think of all the ways he can bring retribution. But your pleading eyes, your hand on his check as you beg him to promise you a different path, makes him squash it down, he can’t deny you anything, even this. 

“I promise, cariño, I promise I won’t lose myself.” His kiss is gentle this time, his arms wrapping around you, as you cup his face. You let yourself stay wrapped up by him for a few, quiet minutes, breathing in his warm scent, his soft lips and hands on your skin. 

“We should go downstairs and see the others,” he mumbles, still close to your lips, “see what Will has to say about the smugglers.” 

You nod and pull away a little from him, taking his hand and tugging him off the bed. It’s a couple of quick showers for the both of you and then you go downstairs. Will and Benny are on the couch as you walk in, Pope making coffee in the kitchen. 

“Morning, sleepy heads!” Benny greets you, he’s got a wide grin, looking happy and relaxed next to his brother. 

“Morning,” you say as Will pushes off the couch and comes over for a hug. 

“Did you sleep ok?” he asks, tilting your head up to check on the cut his men left on your cheek. 

“Out like a light,” you say, and it was true, you hadn’t even had a nightmare. “You ok?” you ask in a lower voice and he catches your meaning, giving you a nod and a small crooked smile. 

“I’m good, it’s surreal to suddenly have breakfast with you guys like nothing changed, and about Hannah…” he shakes his head a little, “I always hoped, a little at least, that she was still ok. But to know that she was alive until just a few months ago…that’s gonna take some time to process.” He shrugs and you nod, leaving it at that for now. 

Will, Benny and Pope have obviously been talking before Frankie and you arrived and they fill you in on the details while you have breakfast. 

“So, the thing with Conway yesterday,” Will says, “had been brewing for a while. The guy’s an asshole, he was only part of the crew because he had good connections when we first started out. He’s been pushing for us to start smuggling and trading drugs, opiates mainly, but I’ve said no to that from the beginning, not happening.” 

“We heard that from Jodie Graham, she said you guys wouldn’t sell any to her,” you say, refilling your coffee mug.

“Jodie’s good to trade with but that was always our disagreement, but she was fine with it, didn’t push it.” 

“So what’s the plan for your crew now?” Frankie’s looking over at Will, “We talked about approaching you guys and working together before but now,” he glances over at you, “I’m not gonna trust them, they attacked us and we’ve taken out a lot of your guys, there’s gonna be bad blood.” 

“Yeah, the idea of you joining my crew died when you killed Conway’s brother in the warehouse,” Will says, shaking his head. “They had orders to scare you, ‘bit of intimidation, not kill you, but that obviously backfired.” 

“Ok, so collaboration is out of the question,” Benny says, “then what the fuck do we do? Take them out?” 

Will sighs and leans back against the counter, uncrossing his arms to rub one hand over his face. “I don’t think that’s gonna work, I mean, yeah we can take them out, we can handle them, no problem. But first off, I don’t wanna, not all of them are bad like Conway, and I’ve been working with some of them for years, I don’t wanna turn around and kill them, or give them a reason to kill me. But,” he shifts on his feet, crossing his arms again, “the guys who you’ve killed, they had family, and friends, in this QZ. And I’m not saying you did the wrong thing when you killed them, they attacked you,” Will’s holding up his hands as both Benny and Pope start to object. “But, as a result, the guys in the crew are out for your blood, and as they start spreading the word about who killed their friends and family, we’re toast, we can’t stay in this QZ.” 

You breath out a low fuck….and sink your head into your hands. You’ve just settled in New York, you just fucking got here, and now you’re all stuck with either leaving, or watching you back at every step.

“Great, back into no man’s land,” Pope growls.

“We should’ve just come to you straight away, Will,” you say, looking over at the other three guys, “We were being fucking stupid.” 

“I’ve been keeping a low profile, and my guys wouldn’t have trusted you, you’re new in the QZ, unknown, too risky. And,” Will shrugs, “what’s done is done, and the Conway situation would’ve blown up anyway.” 

“So we need to leave again,” Frankie says, seemingly shaking himself out of inactivity, “when, how and where to? We need to figure out where the fuck we’re going this time.” 

“I think I can answer the ‘how’,” Will says, “I talked to Jodie in private the last time I saw her. She was willing to let me sail with them up to Dartmouth, outside Providence. They trade up there. Their ship is big enough for the five of us, and them, so as long as we pay our way, they’ll take us.” 

“That gets us a long way away from New York,” Pope says, “sounds like a good idea. And getting to Orchard Beach is no problem, we’ll just have to be extra cautious and avoid your guys, Will.” 

“And then what?” you ask. “Is there a QZ in Providence?” 

“Yeah, there is,” Will nodded, “Jodie says it’s small but decent, might be good to check out, if not, the Boston QZ isn’t much further north and that’s a big one.” 

You look over at Frankie who nods at you, “I’m in, if we have to leave, that sounds like a solid idea.”

“I’m in too, and sailing sounds like a really nice way to travel,” you look back at Will, nodding your agreement. 

“Alright, if everyone’s in, I’ll get in touch with Jodie, set it up. In the meantime, we need to lay low,” Will says and everyone agrees. 

The next few days are spent collecting supplies and going over the resources you have while trying to stay out of sight. Frankie and Pope do a short trip outside the wall to clear a cache they’ve got stashed. You pace the apartment while they’re gone, glancing out through the window every time you hear a noise. When they get back you breathe a long sigh of relief, pulling Frankie in for a long hug. He tangles his fingers in your hair as he holds you close, letting his solid body under your arms sooth you. 

You choose to leave just after the curfew comes into effect at six pm, jogging through the empty QZ until you get to a tunnel you rarely use because it’s broken up and slow going. Slipping into it, the five of you stop just inside the entrance, waiting for anyone who might’ve followed you. After fifteen minutes you continue on, nothing moves behind you. You get through to the other end without any issues and quickly make your way through the Bronx towards Orchard Beach. Nothing stirs in the night and it’s almost worse, you’re expecting something to happen, something to go wrong, but you arrive at the beach with plenty of time to spare.

You camp out on the side of the beach, waiting for Jodie and Damon to show up. You’re nervous while you wait, pacing back and forth until Frankie stops you by pulling you to the side and wrapping his arms around you. He doesn’t have to say anything, you just bury your face against his soft flannel shirt, and let him rub his hands up and down your back. 

By the time the ship sails into the bay, a thin new moon has risen over Long Island and there’s a steady breeze. Jodie comes in with the small dinghy and gets you all out to the ship, it takes two trips to get you all and your bags onto the sailing vessel. Once you’ve climbed onboard and look back towards the shore, you feel your shoulders relax, leaving New York QZ and the exposed world outside the walls behind. Damon and Jodie get the sails up, helped by Pope, the only one of you with any kind of sailing experience, and the ship starts moving north. Damon sets a course that takes the ship out through the Long Island Sound and as it widens the shorelines on both sides disappear from view. 

“I’ll take the first watch,” he says, “Jodie will take the second one so you’re all welcome to sleep in the bunks below deck, might be a bit cramped though but there’s plenty of room to sleep on deck.” 

Benny, Will and Pope disappear beneath deck and you poke your head down too. There’s two bunk beds set up on either side of the narrow hull. At the aft of the ship there’s a small bedroom where Jodie and Damon sleep. 

“I wouldn’t mind sleeping up on deck, what about you?” you ask Frankie, eyeing the one single bunk bed available. 

“Sounds like a very nice idea,” he smiles, “Will snores.” 

“I do not,” Will grumbles in reply from the top bunk he’s climbed into, already inside his sleeping bag. 

Frankie chuckles and pulls you back up top. There’s plenty of room on deck and you roll out your sleeping mats, cushioning them with a few thick pillows Damon offers you, and zipping your sleeping bag together. The night air is cool but fresh and salty as Frankie pulls you close, your head on his arm as you both look up at the sky. The stars are impossibly bright out here on the water and in a low voice Frankie points out the different constellations, showing you the north star, a bright light in the sky. 

“It’s less than one degree away from the north pole, so if you see it, you always know where north is.”

“Did you ever use it to navigate with?” you ask, tilting your head to get a better look at it. 

“Several times, it’s a quick reference when you’re moving at night.” 

“You’re such a boy scout, Francisco,” you tease him, “Big, scary, Delta Force boy scout.” You giggle as he growls into your ear, his fingers finding the soft skin at your waist and tickling you.

“If we were in a bed I’d show you how I got my knot tying merit badge,” he chuckles as you squirm under his fingers. 

“Pretty sure we’ve already done that,” you smile as his hands return to their soft caresses over your skin. 

“Pretty sure you really enjoyed it too,” Frankie smirks, the memory of several occasions when he’d used his one tie to restrain your hands making you squeeze your legs together. Something to remember for when you’re next in a safe location and on your own. Right now you’re getting sleepy and you turn, your back pressed up against his chest.

“Sleep well, hermosa, te amo.” Frankie nudges his nose against your neck as he gives you a soft kiss. 

“I love you too, my sweet Frankie,” you mumble, his arm a warm weight over your body. 

Damon and Jodie make sure the ship sails safely through the night and when the early morning sun wakes you, the ship has already passed New Haven. It’s another full day of sailing before you reach Dartmouth according to Damon and you’ve already agreed to spend a second night on the ship so that you can disembark the next morning in daylight. A whole day on a sailing ship turns into what feels like a well deserved holiday and you’re starting to think Jodie and Damon really have the best idea about how to live in the apocalypse. 

“Do you ever see other ships out here?” You ask as Damon brings out the fishing rods after breakfast.

“Not much anymore,” he says, “in the beginning there were a lot of boats around, both sailing boats and motor ones, nowadays we only see sailing ships but even they are rare. Might get one passing on the horizon.”

“Do you ever approach them, see if anyone is alive?” you ask as he hands you one of the rods and a tub of homemade bait. 

“Sometimes, depends on how badly we need supplies or gear. We follow them for a bit, see if anything stirs, most times the ships are empty or have infected on them. In the past year we’ve only come across two other ships with people on them. Trade with one of them, the other one wanted nothing to do with us.” 

You cast out, following Damon’s instructions, the other guys are also casting out around the ship, Frankie’s next to you, he’s been listening to Damon speaking. 

“Do you ever go ashore?” he asks, “For supplies?” 

“No need any more, we trade for what we need most times, scavenge ships for the rest.” 

“And eat a lot of fish,” Jodie sighs from the steering wheel, “I used to love eating fresh fish, now I’d be happy if I never ate fish again in my life.” 

“I’ll see if I can catch a burger for you, Jodie,” Will jokes from the stern and everyone laughs, it’s a nice relaxed, holiday feeling on deck. Frankie insists on you wearing his cap as he sees you squinting at the sun, it smells like him and you give him a grateful kiss on the cheek. The sun has already given him a deeper tan and more freckles and he looks irresistible as he pulls off his t-shirt, he catches you staring and winks at you with a grin. 

“You look like a snack, Frankie,” you whisper into his ear as you kiss his cheek again and he smiles, turning his head and kissing your lips. 

“Never thought I’d be getting a tan in the apocalypse.” 

Between the six of you fishing, you catch plenty, more than you need. But Damon has figured out how to extract salt from the ocean water, and shows you all how he preserves the fish by drying and salting it. He gives you plenty of what he’s already dried as extra rations, and prepares what you’ve caught while the best catch gets grilled straight away. 

None of you have eaten fresh fish in years and it feels like a feast and even more like a holiday when Damon serves up what you’ve just caught. You stuff yourself, tipping back on the deck after lunch with your hands on your belly, groaning at how full you are. Frankie smiles down at you from above, his unruly curls waving in the breeze as his eyes crinkle at the corners with a smile, sunlight filtering in and out between the sails and lighting up his tan skin. You’re suddenly hit with a pang of nostalgia, a memory of your first date with him, lying back on his blanket in the park, your belly full of tacos and smiling up at this gorgeous man who’d just taken you up for your first helicopter ride. 

“Do you remember when we had tacos in the park?” you ask and put your hand up to his curls, running your fingers through them. 

“How could I forget,” he smiles, “our first date. I fell asleep on your chest and if you keep doing that I’m going to fall asleep again.” 

You smile up at him and rake your nails across his scalp, always his favorite thing. He drops down and puts his arm over your waist, head on your chest just like he did in the park and it doesn’t take long before you can hear his soft snoring. You catch Will glancing over at the two of you with a smile but when he turns away it slips off his face, replaced with something more doleful. He turns and looks out over the empty ocean and you see his hand curl, white knuckled, around the railing and you know what he’s thinking about. You blink back sudden tears as you look up at the blue sky, dotted with little white tufts. You’d give anything to have Hannah safe on this ship with Will too. 

By the time the sun slips under the western horizon, you’ve reached Dartmouth, the old town dark but still relatively unbroken by the looks of it. Damon takes the ship out further into Buzzards Bay and anchors up. You’re sleepy and relaxed after a day in the sun when you curl up next to Frankie on deck, falling asleep almost instantly as the ship gently sways on the waves. 

The following morning the fog is thick over the bay, but Jodie and Damon have sailed here many times and they easily navigate to the shore, bringing you in at Nonquitt Beach outside Dartmouth. Jodie rows the dinghy in, bringing Pope, Frankie and you in last. 

“Thanks for everything, Jodie,” Pope says, as he unloads the last of the bags. “Safe sailing, we’ll try to get word to you about where we end up.” 

“Take care of yourselves now,” she gives you all a final wave before pushing off the shore again. 

“Ok, back on dry land,” Benny says, looking over across the beach, towards the residential area behind it, “What does the map say, what route?” 

“We head north up to route six, follow that to Taunton River, route six crosses it but if that bridge is out, there’s another one just to the north,” Pope says. “After that it’s a straight stretch into Providence.

Will looks over Pope’s shoulder and points at the neighborhood beyond the beach, “I suggest we try to get through this area and then go inland up to route six. Less houses when we’re away from the coast here.” 

Pope nods in agreement and pockets the map while the rest of you ready your guns. You’ve got three rifles between you now, and you’ve each got a handgun. In silence you all start moving across the beach, Pope in the lead, Will bringing up the rear. It’s not fast going but the neighborhood is empty and quiet. Jodie and Damon had left you here because it was a regular spot for them to meet traders and the area was regularly cleared by people who moved through it and it shows. The buildings are empty, looted, and nothing stirs. 

Finding route six is easy and then you turn west, following it to the river. The trek takes most of the day, a few detours necessary to avoid infected and by the time you see the river, it’s too late to go further, but at least your first day off the ship has been uneventful. Finding a safe looking building to stay in for the night, Pope, Will and Benny go through it, making sure it’s empty, before you make camp in the top apartment. You all divvy up the watches and despite being outside the wall in an unknown city, you sleep fairly well after your watch, and the night passes quietly. You wake up on your side with Frankie’s arm around your waist and his solid body pressed up against your back, by the sound of his heavy breathing, he’s still sound asleep. Desperate for a pee, you carefully move away from his arm and step into your boots. Will is on watch, the final one for the night, and he gives you a warm smile as you step out of the apartment after a quick bathroom visit. He’s standing at the top of the stairs and you lean against the window ledge next to him. 

“All quiet?” you ask in a low voice, not wanting to wake the others still sleeping inside the apartment. 

“All quiet,” he confirms with a nod, “Did you sleep well?” 

“Yeah, it felt pretty safe here, and having you four around helps,” you smile, “It’s really good having you back, Will,” you give his hand a quick squeeze and he smiles again. 

“It’s good being back with you all too,” he says but then hesitates, falling silent for a minute while you watch his mind work, and you reflect over how Will was always more like Frankie with his words, never speaking just for the sake of speaking, they always consider what they want to say before they speak. 

“It’s good being back with family,” he offers eventually, “and not just Benny. You, Frankie and Pope too. I had people I trusted to a certain degree in New York, mostly because I had to trust them. But they were never friends, never family. I’d forgotten what it feels like to be with family.” He looks over at you again, “I missed it more than I realized.” 

“I’m sorry we didn’t find each other sooner. We heard rumors about a guy who sounded like you in the months after the outbreak, but we didn’t think it could be you because it was all the way up in New York.” 

“Yeah, Benny told me about it, I don’t think I would’ve believed it myself.” He shoulders the rifle and comes to stand next to you, leaning back against the window ledge. “I...I feel guilty for not trying harder to get back to Hannah, to Arlington. Things might’ve been different if I had.”

“Or you could’ve died on the way there, there’s no point in thinking you could’ve changed anything. We did what we thought we could do.” 

Will stays silent for a few minutes, you turn to glance out through the window, down at the street, it’s slowly getting lighter now. As you turn back you hear him exhale slowly.  

“Benny told me about Lucía, but I didn’t get a chance to talk to Frankie about it yet,” Will says, his voice even lower, looking over at you. “I’m really sorry, Ben told me it got pretty bad.” 

“It did, we were at Denny’s cabin after and he shut off, barely even spoke. I…I had moments when I wasn’t sure we’d make it, it would’ve been so easy to just stop trying to survive. Frankie didn’t seem to see a reason to live either, I had to keep him alive.”

“What got him out of it?”   

“He got kinda jolted out of it when we got attacked on our way to the Franklin QZ, we were attacked by raiders, we got separated but Frankie killed them, burnt their place down and got us out. But what he had to do…to Lucía…” you trail off, exhaling slowly, “He’s…there’s something darker in him now, it changed him.”

“I think we’ve all changed, forced by circumstances,” Will says, keeping an eye on the open door to the apartment down the hall, “but that kind of trauma would break anyone, and Frankie had been through a lot even before it.” He looks over at you again, “He’d be a lot worse off if it wasn’t for you though, you know that right?” Will gently nudges your shoulder with his own, “You were good for him from the start, before the outbreak, and anyone can see now how you ground him, keep him centered.” 

“I hope it’s enough,” you sigh. Frankie’s darker moments were less frequent after the years he’d spent getting help from Herb, but you’d seen them flare back up when things got heated. The anger was closer to the surface than ever, never directed at you, but always present if he perceived a threat to you, or the violent thoughts he fell into when he thought of revenge. 

“Morning guys,” Pope comes out of the apartment, rubbing sleep out of his eyes, “all quiet?” 

“Yeah, we’re just catching up,” Will says and you push off from the window ledge. 

“Morning, Pope.”

“Morning, hermana,” he gives your shoulder a quick squeeze, “Please go wake Fish, he responds so much better to your morning kisses than mine.” 

“Tonto del culo,” you smirk at him and he chuckles. 

“He really is only teaching you the bad ones.” 

You find Frankie still sound asleep and you almost don’t want to wake him, he looks peaceful and younger, splayed on his belly with his arm as a pillow, the other one thrown over where you’d slept. Benny has stirred across the room, sitting up and scratching his chest. 

“Is it morning?” he asks, his voice drowsy. 

“Yeah, the others are up, I’m just gonna wake Frankie,” you whisper and Benny nods, pushing back his sleeping bag. You sink down on your side, next to Frankie, and run your fingers through his curls, pressing your lips to his scruffy cheek. His nose twitches and a low rumble comes from his chest. 

“Keep doing that, hermosa,” he mutters, his voice rough with sleep and you smile into his patchy beard, your nails scratching across his scalp. 

“Time to wake up, love,” you whisper and he grumbles again, his arm coming up to wrap around your waist and pull you closer, his nose buried against the soft skin of your throat. 

“Despiértate, el pececito,” Pope says, coming into the apartment again, grinning at Frankie’s grumbling. 

“Don’t fucking call me that, I’m bigger and older than you,” he mutters, rolling over on his back as you sit up. 

Coffee and breakfast is quickly done and then packed up before you all head down to the street again. Route six leads right up to the river’s edge, but that’s where it stops, the huge six lane bridge has been wiped out by the bombing after outbreak day. The twisted blue girders lay rusting in the water next to the USS Massachusetts.

“Alright, plan B,” Pope says, pointing north, “there’s another bridge about two miles upriver.” 

“I wonder if anyone thought to make camp on the warship,” Benny says as you walk past it. Nothing stirs and it looks uninhabited but also like it would make a regular fortress with a few guards.

“Probably, but I prefer Jodie and Damon’s idea,” Frankie says, “be far out on the ocean, away from everything, that’s how I’d like to do it.” 

“Wish I could sail,” he adds in a lower voice so that only you can hear, “then that’s what I’d do, take us out there, maybe find a small, uninhabited island down south for shelter during the winter.”

“I’d like that, Frankie,” you whisper back at him and he gives you a quick wink, before he turns forward again. 

“ ‘Veterans’ Memorial Bridge’, how appropriate,” Benny says as you approach the smaller bridge, “But it doesn’t look too good.” 

“Looks like it should hold though,” Pope says, “Let’s get a closer look.” 

The bridge is low and flat and used to open in the middle to let ships through, the center section splitting in two parts and standing straight up. Most of the bridge is still in place and looks solid, but the part that opens hangs below the bridge, as if the two movable slabs have collapsed and sunk lower than their hinges should allow. You all walk up to the edge of the bridge and look out over the tilting road surface. The opposite side of the bridge sits lower than the eastern side, you have to jump across and down to get to it but it seems doable, even to you. 

Benny takes a cautious step onto the part of the bridge that slopes downwards, it doesn’t move under him and he tests it by bouncing on his feets, as if he was on a trampoline, finally jumping up and slamming his boots down onto the surface. The bridge doesn’t budge and Benny looks up at the rest of you. 

“Seems solid enough,” he says, bouncing a few more times. 

“What’s our option, Pope?” Frankie asks, eyeing the gap at the end. 

“Next bridge is twelve miles north of here,” Pope replies, “Doable, but it takes us a long way away from Providence.” 

Will steps out on the bridge next to his brother and does a few test jumps, moving further out from the solid section. 

“It’s not moving an inch, I say we go this way, the jump at the end is easy enough.” 

“Ok,” Frankie agrees, “But let’s go slowly and carefully, I don’t want a fucking bridge collapsing under me.” 

“Too many arepas, fishsticks,” Benny taunts and Frankie flips him off. 

Slowly you all move down the sloping road surface, it remains solid, even when you get to the end of the section and look down at the jump. 

“That side tilts a bit more, be careful when you jump, Benny,” Will says, eyeing his brother as he gets ready to jump. 

“Nothing to it, Ironhead,” Benny says and takes a gigantic leap, overshooting the gap by several feet and slamming down onto the road surface with a grin. 

“Beat that, bro!” he calls, flexing his arms, posing for imaginary cameras. 

Will chuckles and backs up, “Watch me, Benny boy.” Will takes a running start and launches himself over the gap, landing a clear foot further than Benny who scowls. 

“I didn’t have a running start, that doesn’t count.” 

“Yeah, whatever, big bro beat ya, kid.” Will smirks and dodges Benny’s playful swipe at his head. 

“I’ll jump first, you follow me, cariño, ok?” Frankie says, “I’ll catch you when you land.” 

“Ok, but it’s a tiny jump, I’ll be fine, Frankie,” you smile and he gets ready to jump, he’s not going to take part in the Miller brother’s pissing contest. He takes a few steps back and clears the gap, landing just in front of Benny who whoops. 

“Still in the lea - oh fuck!” 

The bridge groans and drops, the section screeching further down towards the water, the angle suddenly sharp. 

“Grab the railing!” Will yells, yanking Benny towards the side while Frankie scrambles to find purchase on something. 

“Frankie!” you yell, you see his boots scraping across the asphalt as he slips down the road. “Will!” Pope shouts, “Grab Fish! Grab him!”  

“Take my hand, Benny!” He grabs Benny’s hand in an armlock and Benny hooks his other arm around the railing, Will reaching out towards Frankie. 

Your heart threatens to jump out of your chest as you watch Frankie scraping along the road, slipping further down as he tries to get to the railing and Will’s hand. You can hear him cursing as his boots slip and he skids down closer to the edge. The bridge groans again and Frankie stumbles, at the last second launching himself forward and grabbing hold of the last part of the railing, his boots dangling over the fifty feet drop. 

“Pull me up!” he shouts, “Pull me the fuck up!”

“I got you,” Will calls, scrambling down the railing, using it as a ladder, “I got you!” He hangs on with one hand and reaches down to Frankie, grabbing hold of his wrist and pulling him up. Benny manages to hook his arm around Will’s waist and together they get Frankie high enough so that he can get his feet up on the railing too. 

“Climb!” you yell, “You’ve got to get off the bridge!” You can hear it groaning under them. Benny is already scrambling up the railing, Will makes sure Frankie’s got a good grip and then they both start climbing, rushing as the bridge section slips lower. It’s hanging at almost ninety degrees now and the screech of the metal hinges makes you and Santi yell at them to climb faster. 

Frankie heaves himself over the ledge, Will and Benny holding on to his arms, dragging him up. They scramble to their feet and run backwards as the section rips loose and crashes into the water below. 

“Fuck…” you hear Benny gasp, Frankie’s bent double, his hands on his knees as he looks over to the other side where you and Pope are now stuck. 

“How far did you say the next bridge was?” you ask Santi, your eyes still on Frankie. 

“Twelve miles, four hour hike if we don’t run into trouble.” He gives the guys on the other side a wave, “You guys ok, no injuries?” 

Frankie shakes his head and Benny gives a thumbs up, they’re both standing up now, a safe distance from the ledge. 

“Pope!” Will calls from across the bridge, “what’s the name of the next bridge?”

Pope pulls out the map, “Berkley Bridge, twelve miles north,” he calls back, “Follow the one thirty eight, along the river. There’s a high school next to the bridge, on the west side.” 

“Alright, we’ll meet you there,” Will calls back, “we’ll leave markers if we get there first.” 

“See you there, stay safe!” Pope calls back, giving them a wave. Frankie’s eyes meet yours and despite the distance you can see the anxiety, you know you’ve got the same look. 

“Pope!” he calls, and Pope cuts him off. 

“I know, hermano, I’ll keep her safe, I’ll get her back to you, don’t worry about it.” You feel Santi put his hand on your shoulder, giving it a squeeze, pulling you back towards the eastern shore. You raise your hand to Frankie, and he does the same. 

“Stay safe, Frankie, I love you.” 

“Te amo, mi vida. Stay safe!” 

Pope and you head back to the eastern shore, you feel your legs shaking, the adrenaline leaving your system and you stumble slightly. Pope reaches out and grabs your shoulder, holding you steady. 

“Take it easy, hermana, you doing ok?”

“Just a bit shaky after all that,” you say, “that was way too fucking close.” 

“Yeah, it was,” Santi gives you a squeeze and keeps walking, “thank fuck Will and Benny were there too.” 

“I wish I could be as cool as you guys in situations like that, and then just brush it off and keep going.” 

“We had years of training, remember? And it didn’t always do us a lot of good, trained to do some fucked up shit but no one taught us how to deal with the aftermath.” Pope pulls out the map and scans the street for any landmarks. “We basically just need to follow the river but it curves around a bit so I’m gonna try to not get us too lost.” 

Off in the distance you hear the tell tale sound of infected and you both freeze in your tracks before Pope grabs your arm and pulls you into an alley. Skirting around, moving slowly and carefully, it’s slow going for the rest of the day. You end up spending an hour hiding inside a building while a horde of at least fifty infected shamble past on the street outside. 

“It might’ve been the noise of the bridge falling that attracted them,” Pope says, peeking out through the window at the last infected stragglers. 

“I hope there's no more heading this way,” you say, it’s already been three hours since you left the others at the bridge and you’ve still got a long way to go. At this pace you won’t get the next bridge before nightfall. 

Together you carefully leave the building and move quickly away from the horde, checking every street corner and blind spot before you move on. You manage to move a few more miles, but then a chilling screech goes up close by and Pope pulls you down behind a car, crouching down. It’s in the nick of time, four runners stumble out of an alley across the street. 

“Fuck, they’re everywhere today,” Pope breathes. Glancing behind you he motions you backwards, into a shop, “In here, we need to get off the street.”

It looks like a small mom and pop dry cleaning business inside, you see racks of empty coat hangers behind a counter as Pope scouts forwards and finds the door to the second floor. The door opens up with a small tap of his boot and you both make your way up the stairs slowly. Whoever ran this shop clearly lived on top of it, the stairs leading to a small landing with a closed front door. Pope pushes it open without resistance and quickly scans the small hallway that it opens to. He motions for you to close the door behind you and it shuts with a soft click. Nothing stirs and you quietly follow Pope towards what looks like the living room. You’ve both got your guns out, Pope in front as he steps through the doorway and sweeps the room. He spots the man a split second before the butt of a rifle comes down on the side of his head and he’s thrown to the floor. The crack to his skull disorientates him but he manages to hold on to his gun, rolling onto his back and aiming at the man now advancing on him, a shotgun raised and cocked. His head throbs and he blinks rapidly to clear the fog threatening to envelope him. 

“Lower the gun or your girl gets hurt.” The growl comes from a second man, holding you firm, your arm twisted up behind your back and a large hunting knife pressed against your throat. He’d grabbed you as Pope stumbled to the ground, twisting the gun out of your hand as he yanked you into the room and bent your arm painfully up behind your back. You can feel the cold blade press into your throat, just shy of nicking your skin. 

You see Pope quickly scan the situation, the determination in the two men, the knife against your throat, and he drops his gun, sliding it across the floor.. 

“Check him for any other weapons and tie him up,” your captor orders the man with the shotgun. “On your belly, hands behind your back,” he tells Pope. You see the anger in Santi’s eyes as he rolls over, gritting his teeth. The man holding you doesn’t relent his grip, your shoulder is screaming, another half an inch and he’ll dislocate it. 

“Please, my shoulder,” you whimper, “you’re breaking it.” 

“Don’t worry, darlin´, as soon as he’s secured I’ll loosen my grip.” He’s still got the blade tight against your throat, forcing your head back, his voice is close to your ear and the deep drawl of his rough voice makes your skin crawl.

The man with the shotgun quickly secures Pope’s hands with a cable tie, patting him down and stepping back. 

“He’s clear, Joel, now what?” 

He looks over at the man holding you and your brain goes into overdrive, putting the face of the man in front of you, older now, more worn, together with the deep Texan drawl of the man behind you. 

“Miller!” you gasp, your throat scraping against the knife as the man’s eyes snap to yours. “You’re Tommy Miller! We met, fourth of July, at Denny’s cabin.” You feel the man behind you tighten his grip on your arm, bending it just a little bit further back and you sob, “You’re Will and Benny’s cousins!”

“You’re Frankie’s girl!” Tommy blurts out, his eyes suddenly wide with recognition, “And you,” he looks at Pope, still belly down on the floor, “you’re one of the Delta Force guys.” 

“Yeah, I’m Pope, get these fucking things off me, man,” he spits. Tommy takes a step forward but Joel barks. 

“Tommy, wait! What the fuck are you doing, we can’t trust them!”

“C’mon, Joel, we know them,” Tommy says but he stops in his tracks. 

“Yeah, we knew them, for a weekend, six fucking years ago!” Joel snaps back, Now the-” 

“We’re with Will and Benny,” you interrupt, moving your head back as much as you can from the sharp blade. “We got separated this morning, they’re on the other side of the river, we’re trying to get to the next bridge to meet them.” 

“Will and Benny are alive?” Tommy’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline and he shoots Joel a hopeful look before he quickly schools his face back into neutrality. 

“How do we know you’re not just lying? Who else is with you?” Joel growls from behind you. 

“Why the fuck would we lie about that?” Pope growls right back at him from the floor, “We’ve been with Benny since Arlington, at the beginning, and we just found Will in New York about a week ago.” 

“Frankie’s with us,” you say, “It’s just us, Frankie, Will and Benny.” 

“Joel…” Tommy says, “We can’t walk away from this, we gotta see if they’re telling the truth:” 

Joel remains silent behind you, you can see Tommy’s eyes on him but his grip on your arm is still firm. It’s like the two brother’s are having a silent conversation, deciding your fate as your shoulder screams in protest. 

“Fine,” Joel finally spits, “but if they fuck us, it’s on you, Tommy!” He removes the knife from your throat and releases your arms. You collapse forward, stumbling away from him with your arm cradled to your chest. Tommy kneels next to Pope and cuts his ties and Pope gets to his feet with a grumbled thanks. 

“Lead the way then, you two in front,” Joel says as you glance back at him. He’s changed more than Tommy, a bit more gray around his temples and on his jaw, but it’s his face, the expression in his eyes that’s made him almost unrecognizable. The Joel you knew for a long weekend six years ago had a friendly, warm face. You still remember his belly laughs when his daughter and Lucía brought him down with tickles, a friendly giant who didn’t even protest when Lucía lay flat across his legs with Sarah over his chest. The man scowling at you now looks dangerous and feral, angry lines carved into his face and a hard set jaw. 

“Sure, I’ll take the lead,” Pope says, accepting his gun back from Tommy, much to Joel’s dissatisfaction. “Let me just check her shoulder first, you twisted it pretty hard by the looks of it.” The sharp tone in his voice isn’t lost on Joel and he only answers with another low growl. 

Pope gently prods your shoulder and you wince under his touch. “Feels like the muscle has been torn, like a sprain,” he says, “I’ll make you a sling when we get to the others, keep your hand hooked into your jacket for now.” He briefly cups your cheek with his hand, “You ok, hermana?” he asks in a low voice and you’re reminded of how similar his eyes are to Frankie’s when they share the same look of concern. 

“Yeah, I’m good,” you say, giving him a small smile and he smiles back. 

“Ok, we’ve got about two hours I think, to the bridge,” he says, looking over at Joel who gives a curt nod. “We good to go?” 

“Yeah, take the lead,” Joel says and motions to the door. 

Pope quickly finds the back door of the shop, scanning the narrow alley before stepping out. You stay behind him, then Tommy, with Joel covering the rear. You move as fast as possible through the streets, eventually coming out into the countryside and cutting across fields. Twice you have to hastily hide from groups of infected, still moving south towards the broken bridge but after the second group has passed you see no more. By the time you see the river again the sun has just sunk below the horizon, it’s taken you almost the whole day to cover the twelve miles and you’re exhausted. As the Berkley Bridge finally comes into view you’re dead on your feet, hungry and thirsty and your shoulder aches. 

“Hang in there,” Pope says to you in a low voice, dropping back and giving your uninjured shoulder a squeeze, “the high school is just on the other side of the bridge.” 

“I can’t wait to just lie down and sleep,” you reply, “I really hope the others got there ok.” 

Pope nods in response and steps forward again, taking the lead as you all step onto the bridge. It’s in one piece and you breathe a sigh of relief when you’re across it. It doesn’t take long to reach the high school and Pope quickly finds a marker carved into the gate post. 

“Back door,” he says and leads you around the building. It’s fully dark now and it’s slow going, but you finally see a half open door to a smaller section of the school and as you approach you hear the sound of a weapon cocking. 

“Stop, identify yourself!” you hear Frankie’s low voice, stern and commanding, he’s expecting two people, not four, and he’s raised the rifle, aiming at you through the darkness. 

“Catfish,” Pope calls, “stand down, it’s us.” 

You see Frankie lower his rifle a little bit as the four of you come out of the gloom, his finger is still near the trigger and he doesn’t put the safety on. 

“Who’s with you?” he asks, his eyes landing on Joel and Tommy behind you. 

“Joel and Tommy Miller, Ben and Will’s cousins,” Pope replies and you see recognition flash across Frankie’s face before his eyes widen. . 

“Holy shit, what are the odds of that?” 

“Pretty high I’d say,” Tommy replies, stepping forward and extending his hand, “Good to see you again, man.” Frankie shakes his hand and then Joel, who, a bit more reluctantly, grabs Frankie’s hand as he extends it.

“Come inside, and we’ll bar this door for the night,” Frankie says, stepping to the side and motioning the men towards the door before he turns to you. His eyebrows knit together as he sees your arm, still hooked into the opening of your jacket to support your shoulder. 

“You’re hurt, what happened?” He shoulders the rifle and steps forward as gently reaches for your wrist. 

“It’s my shoulder, Pope says the muscle is torn a bit. He’s gonna make me a sling.” 

“How did it happen?” he asks, moving his hands up to your shoulder, his eyes searching yours for any discomfort. 

“I’ll tell you later, I just wanna get inside and sit down, I’m exhausted, Frankie.”

“Of course, c’mere, I’ve got you,” he leads you inside and helps you off with your pack as Pope and Tommy shut the door and slide a heavy iron girder in place.  

“We’re just a bit further in, we found a room with shuttered windows so we can have some light.” Frankie leads you all down a hallway and turns right, pushing open a door he steps into a classroom. The desks have been pushed up along the walls and in the middle Will’s got a couple of camper stoves set up, the smell of food making your stomach growl. 

“Look who we found,” Pope grins as he waves Tommy and Joel in through the door. You can’t help but smile as you see Will and Benny look up, confusion on their faces at first and then, almost simultaneously, shift into huge smiles as they recognise their cousins. 

“Holy shit, what the actual fuck?!” Benny whoops and jumps to his feet, grabbing Joel into a bear hug, “Where the fuck did you come from?!” he says as he tries to pick Joel up off the floor under loud protests. 

“Put me the fuck down, Benny,” he laughs, slapping him on the back. Will and Tommy hug, big grins on both men and then Benny pulls Tommy into another bear hug, laughing as Will embraces Joel. It’s good to see the tension melt away from Tommy and especially Joel. He’d been guarded the whole way, not quite trusting that Pope and you were telling the truth. But now, seeing the four Miller cousins hug it out with big smiles, even Joel looks less intimidating. 

Frankie gently takes your uninjured hand and leads you over to where his sleeping bag is rolled out, helping you sit down. You sink down gratefully and lean back against the wall, finally relaxing. 

“Let me get your boots off,” he says in a low voice, the Miller boys still catching up and laughing behind him. You nod and rest your head against the wall, closing your eyes. Your shoulder is throbbing, you’re going to have to dip into your small supply of expired painkillers soon. Frankie pulls your boots off, and your damp socks, gently rubbing the soles of your feet as you sigh and shoot him a pleased smile. 

“Thanks, Frankie,” you mumble. 

“Anything, hermosa,” he smiles back, letting go of your feet. “But I need to check your shoulder, might be less nice.” 

“Do what you have to do as long as I can have food afterwards, I’m starving.” 

“You took a long time getting here, what happened?” Frankie asks, making you sit up so that he can slide your jacket off. 

“There were infected everywhere, we had to stay hidden for long periods of time. Pope thinks maybe the noise from the bridge collapsing attracted them.” 

“Yeah, we saw some on our side of the river, but not that many. How does this feel?” He gently prods the joint of your shoulder and you wince as he carefully moves your arm. 

“Hurts and feels very stiff,” you say, glancing down at it. There’s a dark bruise forming and you can see the swelling around the joint.. 

“If we had an ice pack I’d put it on,” Frankie says, “But for now, keep it still, I’ll get you that sling.” Frankie steps over to his pack and rifles through it, coming back and setting your shoulder more comfortably against your chest. You watch his deft hands as he works and when he’s done you lean in and capture his lips in a soft kiss. He hums against you, his hand coming up to cup your cheek, thumb caressing your skin. 

“I’m so happy you’re ok, Frankie,” you whisper, “Did you get hurt on the bridge?” 

“Just a few scrapes,” he says, his mouth still close to yours as he turns up his palms and shows you a few angry looking lines. “I had to clean them with alcohol, that fucking stung,” he chuckles, “but they’re fine now. How did you hurt your shoulder?” 

“Promise you won’t get mad?” you say, pulling back a little so that you can see his face clearly and he frowns at you. 

“What happened?” His eyebrows come together in a frown, his body stiffening under your touch.  

“We, Pope and me, had to hide in a building when a group of infected surprised us.Turned out Joel and Tommy were already in there and they grabbed us, Joel twisted my arm behind my back. But they didn’t know it was us,” you say hastily as you see Frankie scowl and look towards Joel. “Frankie,” you pull his eyes back to you, “they just did what we would’ve done if someone unknown walked in here now.” 

“Yeah, ok,” he relents, his face softening again, “Let me get you some food, should be done now.” 

As Frankie stands up Joel comes over, he’s got a bowl in his hand and as he crouches down he hands it to you. 

“How’s the shoulder? Sorry ‘bout it,” he says, looking at the makeshift sling Frankie’s put together. 

“It’s sore, but it’ll heal, don’t worry about it,” you reply, gratefully accepting the bowl of stew and rice. 

“Alright,” Joel responds, clearing his throat, “Good, and thanks for…” he waves his hand over at where Benny and Will are deep in conversation with Tommy, going over what’s happened in the six years since they last saw each other. “It’s good seeing them in one piece.” 

“I’m glad we were able to bring you guys together,” you say as Joel gets to his feet again, nodding to Frankie.

“Good to see you too, Frankie.” 

“Yeah, same, Joel,” Frankie replies as Joel turns and begins rolling out his sleeping mat.

Frankie grabs a bowl for himself and sinks down next to you, you’re almost done with the stew, wolfing it down. 

“Got you some painkillers too, cariño,” he hands them to you with his water canteen and you gratefully swallow the two pills. Once they kick in you slip into your sleeping bag, drifting off as Frankie helps Ben take care of the dishes. You barely wake as he slips in next to you, careful to not disturb your shoulder, but you reach for his hand as he puts his arm over your waist, turning your head towards him as he places a soft kiss on your cheek. 

The dull throbbing in your shoulder wakes you early next morning and forces you to get up, just to get some relief. There’s thin slivers of light shining through the shutters, giving you enough light to move around and pad out into the hallway in your socks. You’d missed any talk of having a watch roster last night but it seems you were allowed to sleep through the night. Tommy is sitting on a bench close to the door you came in through, playing cards with himself, a rifle next to him. 

“Morning,” you greet him and he looks up. 

“Hey, how’s the shoulder?” He scoots over on the bench, making room for you as you carefully move your arm. 

“Sore and swollen, it’ll take a few days to get better, but don’t worry about it,” you say as you see his apologetic face, “you did what we would’ve done in the same situation.” 

“Yeah, I suppose, we all have to assume the next person we meet is either infected or the enemy.” 

“Not much trust going ‘round these days,” you agree, watching him gather up the cards and shuffle them. 

“I wanted to ask you,” you begin cautiously as he starts dealing. “Joel’s daughter, Sarah?” 

Tommy nods, his hands stopping as he looks up at you, “She didn’t make it, she died that first night,” he says, his voice low and you sigh and close your eyes. 

“Fuck...I’m sorry, Tommy,” you look up at him again as he leans back against the wall. “I didn’t wanna assume but when she wasn’t with you, I had to ask.”

“Yeah, of course, just don’t mention it to Joel,” Tommy tilts his head so that he can look over at you. “He’s not one to talk about it.” 

You nod, rubbing your hand over your face, “I get it, more than you think.” 

“Frankie’s girl?” Tommy says and you hear the question in his voice. 

“A few days after the outbreak, she got infected.” 

Now it’s Tommy’s turn to breathe out a low Fuck as he drops his head back against the wall again. “I’m sorry, for you and for Frankie, she was a great kid.” 

“So was Sarah,” you say, giving Tommy a weak smile, “Lucìa wouldn’t stop talking about her after we got home, she was bugging Benny to invite you guys over as soon as possible so that they could meet again.” 

Tommy chuckles softly, “Yeah, I remember them thick as thieves at Denny’s, Lucìa following her around like a puppy.” He absentmindedly shuffles the deck of cards in his hand as you both stay silent for a few minutes, the soft snores of the still sleeping men coming from the classroom. 

Tommy suddenly laughs softly, keeping his voice low, “I remember how annoyed Frankie got when I flirted with you that weekend, he got really possessive, those hickeys the next morning,” he grins and you feel your cheeks getting red at the memory, even all these years later. 

“Feels like a lifetime ago,” you say and Tommy nods. 

“Poker? I promise I won’t suggest the strip version,” he grins, dealing out the cards again. 

You play a couple of rounds until you hear people stirring in the classroom. Frankie pokes his head out of the door and comes over when he sees you. 

“Morning, sweetie,” you smile up at him as he bends to give you a kiss. 

“Morning, cariño, you sleep ok? How’s the shoulder?” He lets his kiss linger a little bit longer than usual, his hand cupping the back of your head, before he pulls back and sits down on the bench next to you. 

“Sore and swollen,” you say, shifting it a bit. 

“I’ll get you a better sling today, just need a piece of wood to support your arm.” 

“What’s the plan, down to Providence?” you ask, “I don’t know if you guys made plans after I fell asleep last night.” 

“Not Providence,” Tommy says immediately, “we were on our way there but the QZ’s fell, overrun by infected.” 

“Shit, what happened?” you ask, “We heard it was fine just a few days ago.” 

“Not sure, but we ran into a survivor a week ago and he said FEDRA got challenged by another group when FEDRA kept cutting rations. FEDRA took out the other group pretty harshly, imposed martial law and people tried escaping or rebelling, it had been going on for a couple of months.” Tommy gathers the cards up and shuffles them before putting them back in the box. “The survivor we talked to didn’t know how it had happened, but infected got in, or someone who was infected slipped through the checkpoint, it started spreading on the inside anyway. FEDRA lost control and started executing everyone, so riots broke out and FEDRA left, just took the last working trucks and just took off.” 

“Did you get to Providence, what’s the situation like there now?” Frankie asks, leaning forward to look at Tommy. 

“We didn’t get to the gates, got told to not go anywhere near it, too many infected.” Tommy glances up towards the door as Joel looks out. 

“Morning, Joel.” 

“Morning, coffee’s ready if y'all want some,” he says and you can smell it wafting through the hallway now. 

“So what’s your plan then?” Frankie asks as you go back towards the classroom. 

“Boston, I think,” Tommy says, “It’s the nearest QZ from here, big enough.” 

You sit down next to Will who gives you a quick smile and a mug of coffee, Frankie sinks to the floor next to you too. 

“Thanks, Will,” he says, taking a second mug. “So what’s our plan then, if Providence is a no go?” He looks over at Will and Pope, “Boston for us too?” 

“I don’t know about you guys,” Benny says, “but I think we should stick together, with Joel and Tommy I mean.” 

You see Pope frown, he hasn’t warmed up to Joel after yesterday, and by the way Joel stiffens and scowls at his coffee mug, you know he’s not all for it either. 

“I think it’s a great idea, Benny;” Tommy says, glancing over at Joel, “You guys are family and we know you and Will consider the rest of y’all as family too, we can trust each other.” 

“What do you say, Joel?” Will asks, he can sense that Joel’s not totally onboard and the older man looks down at his coffee, jaw working as he seems to go over the options in his head. 

“Yeah, might be a good idea,” he says eventually, but there’s still hesitation in his voice, “there’s safety in numbers and y’all are ex Special Ops, and like Tommy says, we can trust each other,” he says the last thing looking over at Pope who holds his gaze for a few seconds before nodding. 

“Yeah, we can trust each other.”

Joel nods to Pope, the two men seeming to come to some sort of silent agreement. 

You think it seems like a good idea, it makes sense. You can’t see Will and Benny just walking away from their cousins now, even if they’re maybe not the same people they were six years ago. And like Joel said, there’s safety in numbers and it’s forty miles to Boston, lots of bombed out suburban landscape to cover. You shudder at the thought, your shoulder aches, you’re in no shape to take on anything and the thought of having to cover forty miles on foot makes you miserable. Frankie notices your body shiver and slips his arm around your waist. 

“What’s up, hermosa?” he whispers softly in your ear as he leans his chin on your good shoulder. 

“It’s a long way to Boston,” you whisper back, looking over at him with worried eyes, “I’m scared, so much can go wrong.” 

“We’ll go slow, be cautious, and not let Benny jump on bridges.” The last thing he says with a crooked smile, nudging your nose with the cool tip of his own.  

“No more bridges please,” you say, giving him a small smile. 

“Maybe I should lay off the arepas,” Frankie chuckles softly, his hand now rubbing soothing circles on the small of your back. “Amor de mi vida,” he whispers after a while, “I can’t promise everything will be fine, but I’ll do everything I can to keep you safe, I promise that.” 

“And keep yourself safe,” you add, “you’re the love of my life too, Frankie.” He gives a little nod before his soft lips press against yours. You’re still sitting next to Will, right by the camping stove, but you’re in a bubble of your own with Frankie. The others talk about Boston, the route and possible dangers. You don’t notice Joel watching you with a frown, his fingers tapping on his thigh, before he glances down at the broken watch on his arm.

Chapter 28

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