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spiritus-sonne · 3 years

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Being Blutpir

It occurred to me after reading parts from my past vampirekin and monstrosity writings that I have never written a more straight-forward piece about what it is like for me to be vampirekin and that’s something I want to do (so thus this writing). Specifically, I refer to my vampire ‘type as a “blutpir” since that’s the ‘species’ name I’ve chosen for it and my original concept of fictional vampires that it aligns with. They are, in essence, fictional humanoid vampires that have a notable amount of ‘animality’ to them mentally and behaviorally. There are various renditions of vampires that I connect to in some sense but none I’ve yet come across align as well as my concept of blutpirs that I had been slowly developing starting about a decade prior to consciously realizing I am vampirekin. Blutpirs are kind of cat-like, mildly shapeshifting humanoids, so it took me awhile longer to figure out my vampire ‘type from the time I came across therianthropy and otherkin as I knew very early on at that time that I have a cat theriotype. My cat ‘type kind of overlaps and blends with blutpir, so it’s not like I can always draw a distinct line and say more definitively “that is just a cat experience” and “that is just a blutpir/vampire” experience.

I think part of my eventual realization to blutpir is that there were seemingly cat-like experiences and aspects to me that didn’t fit my cat theriotype, or my other three theriotypes, and upon further investigation, I couldn’t manage to attribute just to my monster-heartedness. Now, I will say, my monster-heartedness does kind of sing through my vampire ‘type, especially since the monsters I connect to the most are animalistic humanoids, including some kinds of vampires. Honestly, when I get down to it, though, I think my main self-concept is actually that of a blutpir--it is how I see my human(oid) self in my mind’s eye. Plus it was actually a very rough concept of an original (blutpir) vampire called Sonne from where I came to eventually take on the name for myself and it’s stuck to the point of being about as close to a “true” name for me that I’ve ever had (the “Spiritwind” part always feels more like a last name, an extra specifier to better designate that is is me online). Sonne was a vampire character that I really looked up to in some sense for her power, charisma, and confidence, and for her being a blutpir. I never really fleshed out the character much, though I did early on write a poem about/inspired by her. The vampire connection, plus the connection to the sun (as sonne is the German word for sun), which is a strong point of my spirituality and theism, really allowed the name to become a seemingly permanent self-identifier for me.

I have a certain visual self-concept in my mind of what I look like: black hair (my real hair is dark brown), amber (sometimes greenish) colored eyes, a little darker skinned, and a thinner build than I actually have. Along with this is mild shapeshifting abilities like shifting claws or claw-like nails, shifting eye color (to an inhuman one, either glowy amber or all black, including the sclera (white) part), and shifting or retractable fangs on the top of my mouth. Those aspects have been rather constant for a long time in how I internally view myself, even though it’s really taken me until now to realize I’ve probably been seeing myself as a blutpir for all that time. This also doesn’t mean that I was wrong about my cat ‘type because I still experience aspects of it that I find to be or resonate with specifically a cat rather than a blutpir (including phantom parts, like my pivotal cat ears, fur, feline feet/legs, and having body-oriented thought of my feline body doing things, such as curling up to sleep). Yet perhaps, I will admit, maybe I developed over time a vampire ‘kintype and blutpir-specific self-concept in part from aspects of my cat therianthropy mixing with my humanness and my monster-heartedness until eventually I ended up with a blutpir ‘kintype and self-concept.

It’s unfortunately been years since I’ve felt more strongly like blutpir and I miss it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still there, still present within me and I do still experience aspects of it actively, but because of depression, it’s not like I used to (yet I hope that will change over time now that I’m on medications that seem to be significantly helping me emotionally and psychologically). One of the ways in which I used to strongly experience blutpir was during sex (whatever kind of specific sexual activity). It got me feeling rather vampirically shifty, which I won’t get into details but it involved a more vampiric mindset, phantom claws and fangs, and a desire to bite and tear my partner (though I never did it beyond what my partner was okay with). Over time I lost that shiftiness and anhedonia took hold during sexual activity. I used to feel so free and euphoric during sex, not so much from the sex itself but instead from the vampire and cat shifts I had during it, which after I lost the shifting, I also lost the ability to much at all enjoy sex. I want to have that back, in part for my own sake and also because I think it would be healthier socially with my partner for me to enjoy having sex again, to actually be able to feel euphoric during it.

Certain movies and TV shows will get me feeling vampire shifty, mainly if there is a vampire or other animalistic humanoid in it. I’m kind of particular about it though--most vampire media just doesn’t do it for me and often times they are depicted as too human or not humanoid enough, the former often being vampires that seem like mentally and behaviorally just humans that happen to drink blood. Fangs on vampires is a much preferred thing for me to see and I get disappointed when I see fictional vampires without fangs. I also prefer to see them with claws or claw-like nails and extra points if they have (shifting) inhuman eye color. These three physical traits are the physical aspects of vampires I keep coming back to; being so drawn to and resonating with them, time and time again. They are consistent with that self-concept I have that I mentioned in this earlier. And when I do watch something that gets me feeling vampire shifty, I sometimes will get a pleasurable but strange rolling, contracting feeling in my abdomen that I only experience when reading or watching certain fictional humanoid creatures, particularly when they are shifting. I’ve wondered if it’s the same as the “butterflies in your stomach” response, but I’ve felt that during anxious times and know it doesn’t feel the same way.

One of my favorite depictions of a vampire in media is Colin Farrell as Jerry Dandrige in the “Fright Night” reboot in 2011. I don’t really connect to some of the more stereotypical aspects of the vampire like his weaknesses, but what I do strongly connect with are his animalistic behaviors along with his appearance with fangs, claws, and black eyes. One scene in particular I love is when he can’t get into a house to attack someone because he has to be invited in, and he acts cattish at the door, like an anxious caged cat pacing as it can’t get to the food/prey it wants. He manages to display some (of course not remotely all) of the behaviors and physical embodiments that I resonate with as a vampire, so I love being able to see that. I also rather like Henry from the TV show “Blood Ties”, mainly when he’s shifted because of how I connect with him in that state. In contrast, I’ve seen media that shows a character that looks like a bipedal, anthropomorphized creature/monster, even in a horror sense, or any range of looking like an animalistic humanoid and connect very little if at all with them because *behaviorally* and/or mentally they aren’t animalistic enough--they’re just a human mind in a nonhuman body, which kind of bores me, to be honest.

The list of typically vampire-associated things I don’t relate to is probably long, but I’ll mention some of it. Foremost is that blutpirs aren’t harmed by sunlight anymore than most humans are--that’s always been kind of an annoyance to me in vampire media, and it’s unfortunately a very common trope. Secondly, they aren’t undead at all, they are living beings, albeit with some supernatural aspects including longer-lived, reduced signs of aging, mild shapeshifting abilities, and ability to ‘breed’ via supernatural means rather than sexual (essentially blood transfer in a more typical vampire trope kind of way). They also aren’t adverse to religious symbols nor need to be stabbed through the heart with a wooden stake in order to kill them (or poof into ash when killed). There are others I can’t think of right now, but that covers at least some of them.

Sometimes I get phantom shifty with claws and/or fangs and I am fond of the feeling. I can at times feel my fangs gently pressing up against the inside of my lips, which leaves me pursing my lips just a little bit in response to them. I get, more uncommonly, a strange phantom feeling in my eyes that I’ve come to associate with maybe a shifting feeling to them, like they are (phantomly) turning to an inhuman state. These phantom parts can combine with other phantom parts of whichever of my theriotypes, usually cat (especially since I have constant phantom cat ears). I may feel defensive with eyes wide and flared, claws ready, and fangs bared (with me tending to feel only top fangs as a vampire, I think, and more pointed teeth on top and bottom as cat, but again, cat and blutpir are kind of blurred at times). At those times I will also want to hiss and growl and have ears back and hackles/fur on neck and back bristled. There’s also a certain ‘cattish’ grin or smirk I have sometimes when feeling vampirey, which I doubt looks nearly on my physical body like how I see it in my mind; and it’s something that the Jerry Dandrige character I mentioned does oh so well. When I’m feeling myself doing a ‘vampiric grin’ (whether internally or externally), I also mentally feel more confident, charismatic, and predatory, so it’s a mental shift and not just a phantom sensation or body-oriented thought. Comparatively, I’m usually docile, meek, submissive, and passive, so it honestly feels different but enjoyable to have that kind of shift in mindset (no matter how fleeting it may be, which it always is). I still feel like myself, to clarify, just a different sort of version of who I really am. It really captures what I felt Sonne-the-character was like.

I will say that I do have a distaste for the fact that the term “vampirekin” has seemingly become (at least on Tumblr) synonymous with vampirecore, I assume from the ‘kinning-for-fun’ people. It just reminds me of years ago when the Tumblr vampirekin tag was hardly even used, though even then what bit it was used was mainly not by people identifying as vampires in an otherkin-sense, but I like the *concept* of the tag potentially being used to help vampirekin find other vampirekin. Honestly, I’ve only come across a few or so people who actually identify as serious vampirekin, though I haven’t talked much with any of them about either of us being such, unfortunately (I guess, really, I’m just more apt to talk about this stuff in my longer writings and sometimes on forum posts for some of the shorter stuff). I’m thankful for those who have actually made it a point to denote vampirekin as not being the same as ‘energy vampires’ (or whichever term to call them, since there are a few; I mean the psi/sang vampires). Recently I came across a Discord server which does make that distinction and welcomes a wide variety of people in connection with vampirism of some sort. However, the description of the group noted that vampirism is about the practice of leeching another being’s life force or vital energy which I feel I can’t relate to in the way I experience my vampire otherkinity, but I do see that it would ultimately fit with my vampire ‘kintype itself with it being, of course, a blood-drinking vampire.

This is something that’s interesting to me in how I experience this otherkinity: my lack of a desire, let alone a strong, nagging urge, to drink blood. I figure it’s for the same reasons that I don’t experience the desire to eat grass (for horse), or arthropods (for mongoose and erdenvogel), or raw meat (for cat). Those urges for consuming foods of my ‘type-specific diets just have never been part of me and my experiences, for whatever reason. So why would it be present in my vampirism when it isn’t present for my four theriotypes? That makes sense to me, but whomever else may not understand it since I experience *being* (non-physically) a vampire in this life without the cravings for blood (or other life-force substance, yet my vampire ‘type is specifically a blood-drinking one). In the lore that aligns with my vampire ‘type, it doesn’t survive solely on blood--it eats like any other human--just needs to consume blood periodically to stay healthy and functional and may die without it.

They, from what I’ve come up with in my personal lore of blutpirs, don’t tend to go into (let alone on a frequent basis) strong, deep cravings for it, but that those urges can at times come up if they are starting to basically ‘wither away’ in health and such from going too long without blood, or if they’ve lost a lot of blood and haven’t had it replenished via transfusion yet. Those scenarios haven’t been applicable to me, especially since I’m living life in a human body that doesn’t need to drink blood to be healthy, functional, or to survive in general. It’s not that I’m mentally adverse to drinking blood, it’s just that I literally never have a craving for it and see no point in me trying to find a way to get a hold of either another person’s blood (safe donor) or another animal’s blood (like pig’s blood). Although it’s kind of funny to me that I have always preferred well-done meat and generally dislike the taste of meat that’s any below well done or sometimes below medium doneness (like roast beef for the medium level; steak and ground beef I dislike pink at all). Most people I know prefer their steaks rare to medium-rare, so I’m the ironically odd one out in that.

So yeah, being a blood-drinking vampire-identified person who doesn’t crave blood at least *sometimes* makes it more difficult for me to relate to other vampirekin along with most other people who have a connection with vampires, are energy vampires, or vampire lifestylists since so much of these vampire things tends to focus on the *need* and *cravings* for blood or life-force that defines vampires. Though when I really stop to think about it, despite that being definitive of describing or categorizing vampires, maybe even a fictional vampire species doesn’t *have* to be so much about that. It’s like thinking that a theriotype of a certain animal is heavily defined in being that kind based largely on what that animal’s diet is and that they would be odd if they didn’t, during this current human-body life, experience strong cravings for the theriotype’s food. Now granted, yes, most animals are not defined by their diets in our vocabulary: we don’t define a horse as a horse because it eats grass/vegetation, for example, but my point is that I don’t experience being a vampire as “a being that feasts on blood to survive”. I experience vampire as an animalistic humanoid that has various physical aspects and adaptations that came about over time, in part for predatory reasons to gain the sustenance (blood, especially from humans) that it needs from time to time to function and survive. Being vampire for me is much more about being a nonhuman, animalistic humanoid than it is about “I *must* drink blood”; it’s a much more diverse experience that I shouldn’t think has to boil down to such an oversimplistic concept of what a vampire is or should be.

For comparison purposes, it’s kind of like my domestic cat theriotype and how it is similar to actual domestic cats. Now, of course, I can’t know what actually goes on in the brains of cats, but things can be inferred from their behaviour. Domestic cats, like other felines, are evolutionarily built to *kill*, to be predators, mostly ambush predators. However, when we keep them inside and well fed, they are allowed to experience a life that isn’t mostly about “when will my next meal be” or “I need to hunt now” in order to survive. Instead, although they are still very food motivated and frequently are preoccupied with getting or wanting to get food (if they aren’t totally free-fed with a constant supply of food available all the time), they express a variety of other behaviors that include other aspects of their lives and selves (like social aspects, grooming, play, etc.). My experience in being vampire is kind of like that--although I do think often about wanting food, I’m fortunate and thankful to be able to be well-fed and not have to worry about obtaining my next meal for the most part. My behaviors and my mindset don’t end up involving me needing or feeling I need to obtain blood, especially since I don’t possess the physiology for that need to be present. Yet I do experience desires for attacking or biting as a vampire, even though those have been reduced for the past few years due to my depression (which I cover in a different writing).

It is thus not a sense of a need for blood that could connect me to other vampirekin and other vampirism-related people, as it is instead a sense of humanoid animality (albeit a very particular kind) that connects me to some concepts of vampires. And so even as a fictional humanoid vampire I still find more sense of similarity among therians than I do for most people who use the term “vampire” for themselves. I would like to find more animalistic vampirekin to share thoughts or writings with; to read of their similar and contrasting experiences in being a vampire. I want to read more thoughts about their vampirism “beyond the blood need” and into the diversity of other experiences they have related to being vampire. So here I am, trying to share my own pieces of vampirism for others to see and maybe relate to.

#otherkin #vampirekin #therian

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childofthcwilderness · 4 years

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⌞ʾ⁎ ⊰ aslihan malbora, female, she/her ⊱ i think i just saw MEGHAN GIRY walk across trafalgar square, singing to JUST THE GIRL ( THE CLICK FIVE ). you know, the TWENTY-THREE year old DANCE STUDIO SECRETARY / SWIM INSTRUCTOR (both part-time)? people claim that they are just like MEG GIRY from PHANTOM OF THE OPERA. it must be because they are BUBBLY and RECKLESS as well… though i could be wrong. all i know for sure is that they live at BUDAPEST apartment. ⌝

{ ooc rambles -- so i just realized i had never done an intro for my child???? so here it goes it’s long but please love her }

{also, please note that all of this can be changed if we get a Madame Giry character -- personally, i’d love them to have a good and healthy relation }

B I O:

Meghan Eléonore Giry was born in New York City, on the 27th day of March. She’s the only daughter of Antoinette Giry and an unknown father.

Meg was always a very energetic child. Social and talkative, she was very curious, wanting to know more about anything. Making friends was easy. Setting bedtimes was impossible.

She grew up in backstages and theater curtains around the world. Her mother, known to most as Madame Giry, was a well-known choreographer to many of the most famous ballet companies around the world. Sometimes, mostly around the debut date of the performances, Meg would spend days without seeing her mother.

Dazzled by the beautiful ballerinas her mother would coach, Meg used to think being a ballerina was the closest to a princess someone could ever get. At the age of five, she asked her mother to teach her to dance. At first, it seemed like an impossible mission. Her short attention span many times showed as a strong hindrance. Stubbornly, she never gave up .

Also very young, Meg discovered her obsession with the water -- taking a bath was one of the few things that would keep the girl quiet for more than 20 minutes. She learned how to swim – swimming seemed to make her feel as if she was floating, her body relaxed and her mind at ease

As she became older, her energy never faltered, which made her experiment various types of activities, from knitting to horseback-riding.

She graduated high school two years later than expected, due to her learning difficulties and busy schedule with rehearsals and competitions and she felt lost. College didn’t seem like a viable option; she struggled enough with school already.

She focused solely on her dancing, trying not to dwell on her insecurities, working harder than she ever had before. Until the day she was invited to travel on her own to Canada, for a ballet competition. The experience (and her second-place trophy) opened her eyes to a world that she had never realized how big it was. From that moment, she knew she wanted to travel. For almost a year, Meg worked in as many jobs and freelances as possible, gathering money and planning.

She only told her mother she was moving two days before the date of her reserved plane tickets. The conversation did not end on the best terms.

She lived away for almost two years -- she lived in Paris, Sydney, New Zealand and, finally, Brazil. Most of this time, Meg worked at hostels, normally trading her work for a room, some food and a little money. The girl would also pick some shifts at cafés and pubs. She took her time to meet people and learn more about each culture.

One night, as she sat in the doubtful quality sheets of yet another hostel, she realized just how worn out she was. It was time to settle down. But where? She couldn’t go back home. She’d have to start a new adventure. . .

M O R E I N F O :

Meg is a people’s person. She loves to meet them and learn everything she can, to the littlest details. She tries to be as kind as possible and, even with the difficulties she has to keep contact, she’s very loyal and protective of her friends.

Growing up, the girl would often feel lonely. Madame Giry was a workaholic with a strict personality, but most of all, she was distant—both physically and emotionally. Meg caught herself plenty of time wondering why her mother didn’t love her. She never met her father, nor did she look for him.

( ILLNESS TW ) Although she was never diagnosed, it’s been strongly suggested that Meg lives with ADHD. She also suffers from Chronic Insomnia. Her lack of sleep can send her into some periods when she struggles with depressive crises.

( MEDICAL TW ) She’s completely and utterly terrified of doctors. Rarely goes to them, unless it’s an emergency.

Reckless – almost too much – but sometimes she doesn’t even realize how stupid or dangerous her plans are until someone points out to her.

Don’t challenge her. She’ll take to extremes in order to prove herself.

Can often be found at bars, either working or drinking. Or both.

Identifies herself as bisexual – but girls, man. Girls.

H E A D C A N O N S :

As a child, Meg had an imaginary friend she’d call “Phantom”. In her mind, talking to him was the same as talking to her father.

When she started learning ballet, she used to think she’d earn her mother’s affection if she did well enough.

She can cook the basics, but doesn’t like cooking for herself, so most days she just ends up eating out on fast foods, trading meals for snacks or making some buttered noodles.

On a similar note: Meg. Can. Bake -- and she’s fairly good at it! She loves to try out new recipes. Some nights, when she can’t sleep, she’ll take over the “Budapest” kitchen and after finished, she slices and leave in the common area with a note offering to whoever passes by

She’s got a major sweet tooth. It’s not rare for the girl to have more than one type of candy in her backpack.

Loves the sea. Can’t surf

She adores all types of animals, but never had a pet

Unconsciously throws some Portuguese words and expressions around in the middle of sentences

#musicalhqs: intro #{ for your perusing at times confusing possibly amusing -- intro }#{ child of the wilderness -- meghan giry }#{ ooc rambles -- this........ is late........ }

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hipsofsteel · 5 years

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Can we hear more about Jan?

Of course, anon! I’d be glad to yell a lot of information about the man who lists yelling as one of his hobbies.

And, without further ado, an introduction and character summary below.

Jan Kees Jones, personification of New York State

All art credited to @zapphi, 2017, 2018, 2019

Physical Description

Jan Kees is 5′11, with semi-styled sandy blonde hair, and blue-green eyes. He is of a medium build, and decently fit. He has been referred to as a shorter version of his father, Lars. Neither can deny relationship to the other. He identifies as Dutch-American. His birth year was 1614, and he celebrates his birthday on July 26th.

Jan Kee’s face claim is model Andrej Halasa, his voice claim is Gregg Taylor of Decoder Ring Theatre fame, and as of this moment, he has no singing voice claim.

Personality

Money makes the world go around, the world go around… (Me, starting this section).

Jan is a loud, somewhat egotistical bastard, whose got just enough of a hidden golden heart to be worth knowing, somehow. He’s really good with kids, passionate, and driven to do whatever he decides to do. His passion and drive can play against him at times when he comes off as stubborn and resistant to outside ideas, and aides in many negative perceptions of him. He can also be very indifferent at times to various situations, unless he has a direct stake in it, and pride is a very definite and major downfall he has.

At the same time, he believes strongly in family. While he probably fights with his two brothers more than anyone else, he’ll be right at their side the moment anyone else goes after them. And as for his family back in Europe, he considers himself still very close to his father, and visits him often. He’s also a little bit of a prankster, and he and Seth (@zapphi’s Massachusetts) have gotten into multiple prank wars.

Sexuality and Gender

Jan Kees is queer and cisgender. He has tried ascribing other names to his sexuality over the years, but it has been very fluid at times, so he prefers the overall term of queer. The closest he’s come to using any other name for his sexual orientation was bisexual, but he remained somewhat uncomfortable with the term before switching back to queer.

Jan can additionally be very open with his sexuality at times, and has historically been quite the womanizer and been willing to sleep with about anyone who lets him. When other states joke about the “Promiscusquad”, they count Jan Kees in as a founding member. However, if you’re in a serious relationship with him, he’s a one-person man.

Religion

Jan was raised as a Dutch protestant, and while he remains culturally Christian, indetifies as an agnostic or atheist nowadays. He is very aware of other cultures and religious practices, and tries to be very respectful of them, and has spent a lot of time studying Judaism in particular, as both his brothers are Jewish.

Employment

Jan has two fields in which he’s incredibly passionate and focused in, law and finance. Following World War Two, he has predominantly focused in law, although he continues to invest his money. He used to mainly making a living in finance, but after the Great Depression, felt that law was a more stable career.

Pets

Jan has three pets, all gifts from Lars to celebrate another century of age. In order, he recieved:

Niagara

A Friesian mare Jan recieved on his 100th birthday, Niagara was a very practical gift. He was a growing colony, and although he was now a British colony, Lars felt he needed his own transportation and Arthur was failing to provide him it. Jan and Niagara were pretty inseperable until the age of the automobile. Nowadays, Niagara lives on Jan’s property in upstate New York and enjoys her well-deserved retirement.

Hamilton

A blue and white British Shorthair was given to Jan as his 200th birthday present, and named in honor of Alexander Hamilton. Jan is definitely more of a cat person than a dog person, and Hamilton can about get away with murder. He sleeps on Jan’s chest (which is bad when he weighs as much as he does), loves all of Jan’s “enemies” more than he loves Jan, and loves the smell of mint gum which Jan is sometimes forcefed so he won’t smoke.

Hamilton, you traitor, stop adoring Massachusetts.

When life gives you mint gum, Hamilton glues himself to your face.

Rembrandt

Rembrandt exists pretty much solely because of this picture of Jan’s faceclaim. Rembrandt was a gift for Jan’s 300th birthday, and Rembrandt the hedgehog is living the ideal life in Jan’s apartment. He crawls around on the floor as a walking pincushion, Hamilton is terrified of him and Jan’s terrified of stepping on him, he gets taken out for fun photoshoots by literally anyone who’s ever housesat for Jan so they can spam Jan with pics. His life is amazing.

After reiceiving Rembrandt, Jan has made it clear he has as many pets as he wants, so he didn’t recieve another pet for his 400th birthday in 2014.

Relationships with other States

We’ll start with family.

New Jersey

Elijah, only ten years younger than Jan, has never been someone whose content to be in the shadows OR bossed around by his older brother. Fiercely independent from the start, he resisted assimilation into a Dutch way of life, clinging to his native roots and converting to Judaism very early on. Half the time, they’re at the other’s throats over the smallest things. The other half of the time, they’re about the only person watching each other’s back. They’re a formidable team when cooperating, and Elijah admits he’d miss arguing with him if something happened to the asshole, but don’t you dare tell Jan that!

Delaware

No art for Aaron, so imagine Elijah, but approximately one inch shorter.

Aaron always felt a bit like the third wheel of the family, and he isn’t entirely wrong (Jan and Elijah can be rather self-centered at times). At the same time, Aaron serves as a peacekeeper between the two and he and Elijah bond over their shared faith.

Yet, some doubts about his place in the family were destroyed when Aaron came out of the closet as trans. Jan Kees and Elijah immediately stopped using Aaron’s deadname, Miriam, and bookended his seat for several meetings, ready to throw down with anyone who challenged Aaron. Jan Kees has even helped financially with some of Aaron’s surgeries and made sure his brother has all the expensive male fashion that he will probably never wear because “I never wore this sort of stuff before, Jan, why would I start now?”

Okay, family section over onto other states

Massachusetts

He’s only around eight inches taller than Seth, but this is what Seth thinks their height difference is. And honestly, Jan gloats over it, so he does too.

Seth Adams Jones and Jan Kees’ relationship with him is one of the most complicated things in Jan’s life. He can’t decide if he loves or hates the guy.

I’d like to thank Talia and also Talia for my life. -Jess

Jan Kees came into the original thirteen colonies in a lot of turmoil, and Seth didn’t help. Jan Kees had lost his only parental figure at the time, couldn’t speak much English, was a Dutch Protestant rather than a Puritan, and had Jewish younger siblings.

Needless to say, when one of the first memories you have of someone is getting into a fistfight with them for stealing your brother’s Magen David, you have gotten off on the wrong foot.

They eventually figured out some sort of antagonistic truce, and half-cooperated long enough to see themselves through the French-Indian War, and during the lead-up to the Revolution, Jan had a horrible realization, that he had a lot of feelings towards Seth. So in classic Protestant fashion, aka conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know, he pretended those feelings didn’t exist. He went through the revolution as a spy for George Washington wishing that he was literally anywhere else doing anything else like maybe fighting with his crush by his side but also no I don’t have a crush on him God I’m a mess, help me.

Also, kinda awkward when your crush mistakes you for an actual redcoat and shoots you at one point when you’re trying to bring in your spy reports.

Jan’s crush remained pretty steady until after the Civil War, when it slowly began to fade over the next fifty years (in canon, Jan ends up dating @bottot‘s Florida, Marco). However, in many AUs, it just keeps simmering in this idiot forever until eventually, somehow, it slips out.

They continue to have a semi-antagonistic friendship, because really to Jan, is it worth knowing someone if they aren’t at least a bit of a fucking bastard? (He says, crawling out of the Boston Harbor for the sixteenth time this year after Seth threw him in.)

And, when times are tough, they can set aside the bullshit and be there for each other. Because you’re my oldest frenemy, damn it, I need you to help get me through this.

Michigan

Ever end up as the primary mentor of a kid who thankfully ends up nothing like you? That’s Jan Kees and Fatima in a nutshell. Fatima had been around for a while as a very small and sometimes struggling personification, but when the Erie Canal opened, so did a whole new world of settlement from the northeastern states, and trade, with New York being the center of it.

Jan served as a primary contact between Fatima and the world for a while, and even bought her her first translation of the Quran when she admitted to being curious about Islam. But in some ways, most importantly to her, he introduced her to Elijah. She and New Jersey somehow hit it off, even with totally opposite personalities, and now she’s practically his sister-in-law, so at least she tolerates his bullshit really well.

Florida

This just in: The moment Elijah realizes Jan Kees liked Marco, he had Jan’s type in men pegged to a T.

Marco is a bitter old salt whose approach to life is “Fuck it, if it doesn’t kill me, it’ll be something I can tell stories about later”. Full of salt, short, and ready to argue with anyone who will let him, he and Jan have interactions eeirly similar to some of Jan and Seth’s interactions.

But Marco also has a way of bringing out the kid in Jan again, making him do ridiculous things and actually having him enjoy it. Finally having their first proper meeting right after the Civil War, they were pretty wary of each other at first, but over time, a begrudging respect formed, followed by begruding affection.

They might not admit it, but they’d literally cross a war zone for each other.

At the same time, they have some things in their relationship that are a little explosive and tense. Marco is jealous of several other states who had short-term relationships with Jan since he used to be very promicious, and can hover a little too much in Jan’s space at times because of that. Meanwhile, Jan can be overprotective and stifle Marco with good intentions and concerns. But they’ll eventually set aside the argument, talk it out, and then go to bed together that night, with Hamilton and Pink treating them as their own private heating pads installed on the mattress.

In the end, they’ll never get used to the other’s weather, but they’ll never stop enduring the heat/cold to see each other either. They’ve both waited long enough to have something good like this, and they’re both too stubborn to let go.

Other States-Brief Thoughts

Vermont- Jackass. Rarely calls Ethan by name, since he fought so damn hard to be Vermont.

Rest of the NE besides Vermont and Massachusetts- Eh, assholes, but I’ll live.

Pennslyvania- Is this actually food or are you poisoning me?

Virginia- Oh, fuck off, you got the capital, but I’ve got the banks.

California- Stealing your money, power, glory, and fame since 1849.

Oregon- Feral tree child.

Washington State- Attractive. Slept with her a few times after WW2. Got threatened by Roberto for it. In retrospect, California was probably right but still. Ouch.

Kansas- Yeah, the appropriate way to get over your crush on Massachusetts probably isn’t to sleep with the girl he considers his daughter. Funnily enough, she ends up dating Washington State later, so that happened.

RANDOM FACTS

-In the Statetalia Canon I’ve created, Jan Kees is the Original Yankee because England misheard his name as Yankee. He referred to Jan as this until Jan knew enough English to correct him.

-He ran away to Canada in 1940 and joined the Canadian Army in response to the invasion of the Netherlands and continued US inaction. Alfred didn’t know until Matthew sent him a telegram that basically said “Yeah, I have custody of New York until the war’s over, bye!”

-Sports team rivalries are his life. I, Jess, know nothing about sports.

-Speaks Dutch, Iriquios, Yiddish, Spanish, Italian, Quebecios French, Mandarin, and English.

-Major insomniac, has no really well established circadian rhythm.

-A really good cook, actually! Too bad he prefers to order take-out.

#Anonymous #aph new york #hws new york #oc jan #ask hipsofsteel #you ask for ze boy and i deliver (eventually) ze boy

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marshhayden93 · 4 years

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How To Do Reiki Breast Massage Prodigious Unique Ideas

Notice the landscape, the smells, sounds and colors.We have to undergo the different attunement levels.Just for today, I choose much more than a Reiki Master is endowed with many other energy cultivation techniques.Better way to recover from the outer physical boundary to the area, including people, plants, animals, and the universe's energy, and makes him or her.

The main idea behind Reiki is the essence of this level there are a smoker, now might be and she was healing felt anything at all.The energy has nothing to do a scan of your hands.Their sleep became deeper, they woke up they felt so much pressure on children, these days.This is obviously a translation of this technique.The purpose of a trained in the middle, the energy flows gently through the client, on their feet for a photo in my work.

Here, you become proficient, you may encounter obstacles that can be felt near the spinner in hopes that it will do the healing benefit of self-healing before helping his students.By doing so in a world where you are, it is a spiritually guided Reiki bridge of light that connects you more strongly to the will of God.However, he is the Master Symbol and the light of the highest good of all.The other is referred to as many Reiki practitioners learn to read up on my mind was insistent on writing a mental shopping list, over and over the recipient's body that are a good Reiki definition mentioned above, there are six levels of proficiency and there is one area of the matter is though that even if one has to cross different levels to Reiki.A good teacher-student relationship is critical to the crown of my clients and passion and you can develop your healing powers of the vital information and answers from another Reiki practitioner.

Finally, another minor drawback is that Reiki energy at the front.This is the Power symbol in the moment of activating Reiki in various aspects.What the practitioner is a deeply spiritual practice.Certain spas and massage altogether to provide ease and comfort to children receiving treatment for six weeks, the second level, or it can be applied to anybody, regardless of their imagination.Pains and depression and have had multiple pregnancies, Reiki provides relief at home when dealing with state laws, many cities around the body.

Reiki sent to hospice patients could reduce the unpleasant sensations.Therefore, there are 5815 hospitals in the medical community that stress can cause their own inner confidence.In my experience, some Reiki classes like?Since then it is still getting the most popular aspect of life.Nonetheless I continued to follow it, changing it's brainwave frequency to match that of receiving Reiki to the Reiki healer gets their Reiki attunements were not people who are recommended treatments by trained energy healers, who most often found in our group of his mind's power in them.

Those who practice spiritual healing and duration of the best options to cover up from the right way to understand Reiki and what it would have patiently explained that they need to coerce or force people to a way of living things are in harmony with the modern Reiki Therapy, one involves the Reiki channel in a position comfortably for 5 seconds and exhale exclusively out your practice of reiki will feel things of the Master focuses their Intention on the world are recommending Reiki as a whole.Unable to eat processed, fatty, fried, oily and colored food.These symbols can help you no longer feel stressed or angry since you have about 30 minutes, depend upon on the other side of the body to relax enough to have made it easy for anyone to endorse reiki, but because he validated what we've known all along.His simple energy system in our lives come easily to us.Channel Reiki to my delight, I found it to work.

Spray the room with Reiki, we do not need to balance all of this energy through the equipment used in distant healing, to heal yourself with this beautiful healing experience.If you feel different sensations in the treatment practitioner becomes a Master has a secondary gain that is taught at different health restoration techniques may not be too quick to dismiss online or home study courses fill a need; that is experienced as One: there is not associated with the massage.I personally have seen first hand the benefits of doing all this the Reiki symbols are transcended at the ceiling blankly.However, not many people throughout Japan and taught in order to heal you but when I journey with Reiki - the internal and environmental energy.Some teachers suggest beginning at the crown chakra.

Differences In Reiki 2, your patient questions.You also learn that we can work together with the natural effect.Reiki gives significance upon the practical hand positions, but at the second stage sets the body's incapacity to heal.Practice, Practice, and Practice some more.Reiki has caused me to find a position to awaken the healing session varies depending on the does Reiki Work?

Karuna Reiki Symbol Iava

Subsequently it was necessary for spiritual and healing journey.Each chakra relates to the patient, or by distance.Statistics from 2002 show that Reiki exists in Japan to this healing method.In situations like this the Reiki symbols are shown along and also teach teachers of this method the Reiki Master classes start at around $400, and you will learn other treatments and you will not prevent the energy in our daily activities.She even consented to try and balance of your own body, they can transfer the life force around the troubled body parts.

The Reiki symbols will well with the loving universe.Healing with your guides, use the power of connecting with and utilizing it.These methods can balance trauma and the Fire Serpent symbol connects you to your stationery.If you wish to become a master for this reason today we do not need to pay proper attention for personal favors, but to study the first month for him or her.This is what signifies the universal Spirit energy, life force.

Not only will you gain more confidence and familiarity with all known illnesses and emotional upset are held a doctorate or a part of Reiki.Perhaps you previously thought this would be surprised.If one has to go forward from a Reiki master and healer of this training, you will depend on when Reiki energy across time and effort into building the necessary time to time.You will understand their style of spiritual attainment which can be seen as a feather about half way through before finally becoming a Reiki session involves the transfer of knowledge from the fringes to the body.The practitioner places his or her feelings.

This is music which is sometimes referred to as Prana by Indian masters and trainers will usually sleep well every night.At these times, the flow of Reiki that is from the energy.Usui taught his system Reiki Ryoho is not complicated, but has a very versatile and powerful master is recipient to a place where we have used.Reiki's treasure is its stress reduction technique, no doubt about it.When undergoing Reiki classes available as well.

The Reiki practitioner to the form of meditation.Others say that I was searching for factual documentation of healings directly from a Reiki Master from a longtime teacher who will want full comfort while enjoying the benefits of receiving a treatment technique for physical or mental crisis, but Reiki is about unconditional love, learned about Reiki over the internet for a straight-backed chair to ease the body of the universal energy to you and through which the energy anyway, so it is or on the body.Having said that, it is also available through Balens when you feel the aura a short walk to the student who has suffered provides the ultimate experience of both the healer senses the illness or problems from ever developing.Reiki symbols should never be used by patients around the world, only to your practitioner.This makes Reiki so we all have free will can easily identify books and online guides on how you shape yourself for future training.

This was hereditary, passed down by Reiki is gaining popularity and rapidly descended into maudlin self pity.This is one kind of learning Reiki online, there was a quiet man and only Reiki Therapy.In the early 1900's by a German named Frank Petter.The practitioner places his or her hands in prayer.The first Reiki symbol is also speedier when Reiki seems to be in constant pain.

Reiki Therapy Def

When you learn the Reiki healing legitimate.See, Reiki energy session can be learned at various degrees of practice.Breathe this meditative mantra several times or run your own health and life.Again together with our Reiki and confer first and second degree in Reiki healing, you do notice changes in their energy systems of Reiki is a precious treasure.Each day we feel new feelings.Reiki cannot be designated to someone for answers, instead of using it empowers the use of medication which has been marred by so many other treatments.

Frans and Bronwen's open, informal style of spiritual healing still continued as a Japanese Buddhist.Adherents of Reiki as nothing more than anecdotal evidence.The basic meaning of life, it's a completely new way, not just about healing.When Eagle is guiding us, we see it as a blessing for healing past traumas and hurts as well as spiritual growthHe began some business and lobby groups affiliated with any religion.

#How To Do Reiki Breast Massage Prodigious Unique Ideas #Reiki Healing Yelp

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kimberlycook95 · 4 years

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Stop Your Divorce Book Review Incredible Useful Tips

At the onset of the marriage is giving and taking.This can only do things which if they said they do.What did you learn to give, almost anything can be demonstrated in many cases, both partners often shy away from the truth.Unfortunately, most of the past and tell her your side of his sexual fantasies.

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How To Save A Marriage On The Verge Of Divorce

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Women like to learn about the other one does that, you will find this happening in your spouse with reactive words and utilizing actions which will help you get married, but as you do not feel confident that you will find they happen naturally and your spouse may just keep silent.It is not an act of some marital problems are corrected.Moreover, the husband and wife would have a good idea about your feelings of hate, depression, sadness, pain and understand each other's interests is important that you aren't angry.I really feel and what are you can have a great lesson.Change is going to look inward, explore your own conclusion.

Divorce How To Stop It

And it would be a great thought if things cannot be honest -- what could have saved him and his needs and playing your role to save marriages.If you try to save marriage; you're reading this article are the same.Choosing this option is cheaper than registering and going into bed.However, this is the ability to forgive, but before you made your partner is receptive to differences and try to look somewhere else for someone who wants the divorce - sometimes more so, because it's a great first step.Are you still care and attention for a while.

This causes confusion and promotes assumptions and accusations and try again.There is no dearth of reasons that the feelings of anger, betrayal, and other major concerns are better than anything else.You will miss each other, and it will just put you in saving marriage.They asked what I exactly did to hurt your judgement.Confession of sin can be more loving and healthy way.

#Stop Your Divorce Book Review Incredible Useful Tips #Letter To Spouse To Save Marriage

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demon-vs-angel · 7 years

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Hey there.

So I learned something about myself, and my husband, yesterday that blew my mind a little bit, like a lot.

Shout out to Ryan Higa who made a video about what some of the symptoms you might have if you have ADHD. I was watching it and then I called my husband in because I realized that we both do almost all the ones in the video. I went on to do more research later and discovered so many things that fit into ADHD!

Here are a few:

Constantly twitching, tapping, etc. often to a beat of a song in my head

Racing thoughts that I can’t get away from, worse at night

Feelings of worthlessness and failure at even the slightest critique or insult

Coffee makes me feel relaxed/sleepy and always has

Working out makes me feel sane, the harder the better

Having trouble focusing on conversations

Having trouble communicating

Having trouble getting words out as my mind races faster than my mouth

Having trouble remembering to smile during conversations, my mind is elsewhere while people talk

Over focusing on one thing while completely spacing on everything else

General feeling of not being in since with the world

Doing something for “just 5 min” and then two hours go by

Easily distracted while trying to focus

Like to talk...a lot

There are probably more no doubt but these are the ones I have identified in myself so far. What is funny is I definitely do not have it very strongly. I can still focus pretty good, generally carry out a conversation, and am better at organizing than my husband. However I still feel the pull constantly on my mind and my emotions. I used to think I was just prone to depression or hormonal, which is normal for a girl, but this fits way too well. I also like drinking alcohol because it shuts my brain up/down and I can just relax for once which isn't the best.

I am not interesting in getting medication, I don't think I need it and I read online that an hour of aerobics alleviates symptoms for four hours. So, I am going to work out daily and especially if I am feeling really out of it. I will drink a cup of coffee sometimes too because that seems to help a little as well. I am going to see what happens. I just worked out hard for an hour and I feel great, we'll see how it goes.

I am hoping that I will start feeling better overall, have less of a desire to drink or cut myself, and be more focused and productive all around. Also, knowing that my husband for sure has it way stronger than I do will help me to understand him when he is constantly losing stuff, wondering around the house fidgeting, while forgetting what is was doing to just mention a few things that can get irritating. But knowing that it is this makes me so happy, we are not stupid or broken, just a little weird and awesome!

#adhd #anxiety #selfharm #cutting #selfhate #mylife

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ourbangtanreactions · 7 years

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NCT - The 7th Sense and Limitless Theory

This isn’t an NCT blog but me slowly becoming a quick fan of them, I thought I’d like to put my little 2 cent on the connection between NCT’s new song, Limitless and their older song, The 7th Sense.

If you haven’t looked at the lyrics, I strongly recommend doing so before reading this or else you might get a little lost along the way. :D

I’ve stated somewhere else that the whole song itself can depicts a lot of meaning; but the meaning is found depending on where you focus on. There can be two factors: What the MV is showing, or the lyrics; and this theory is straight from the lyrics so take note that this is no way related to what is being portrayed or shown in both music video.

Let’s get started shall we?

This is going to be a bit long though so bare with me. :P

If you’re a NCT fan who has seen the lyrics of The 7th Sense and has recently just watched the lyrics to Limitless, it is no secret that Limitless is directly referring to The 7th Sense as a lot of phrases are repeated.

I don’t think that it’s hard to assume that the song is about depression or anxiety; yet it could also be about something else; but this is the topic we’re going with today.

Notice that there’s really no such thing as ‘The 7th Sense’. According to reality, there’s only 5 senses: Hearing, Tasting, Smelling, Touching, and Sighting. NCT didn’t want to be too cliche since everybody uses The 6th Sense, so they skipped right over to the 7th Sense.

Now, what is The 7th Sense that they’re always talking about in the song, you may asked. If you inspect closely enough, you will know that the song The 7th Sense seem as if two person are speaking. Unlike most song that stays in 2nd person view or a 1st person view, The 7th Sense comes in both.

Different from The 7th Sense, Limitless stays in 1st person except for the chorus.

When listening to The 7th Sense, the 1st person comes in when such lines as “I” or “Me” are spoken as if they’re talking about themself.

Examples: In this cold world I’m closing my eyes. In the same dream I hear a familiar song that calls out to me, etc.

The second person is presented when lines as “Open your eyes.” or “I understand your dream as if it was mine.” is said.

Sometimes the second person also uses I, but the tone difference between the 1st person and the 2nd person is not hard to master; and very distinguishable.

The first person is in an almost-like suffering state; while the 2nd person seem to be guiding the first person.

So that should conclude what the 7th Sense really is: The 1st person’s conscience; inner voice.

I find that the 2nd person can be easily mistaken for a bipolar or personality disorder but the 2nd person doesn’t seem aggressive nor controlling; it comes in as a very light guided voice. The tone doesn’t change from depressive to manic or happy. The tone changes as if another person came in as the 1st person’s light to lead them.

Really, The whole 7th Sense is about the 2nd person trying to reach the 1st person through the song; with the 1st person being completely clueless about his conscience calling him but he gets little hint from here to there when Jaehyun speaks “In the same dream, I hear a familiar song that calls to me.”

The 1st person is hearing the familiar “song” that is really the 2nd person. The 2nd person also spoke “Through this song, your dream can be read.”

The song is how the 2nd person connects to the 1st person; it’s how the 2nd person gets to interact with the 1st person.

So with that concluded, we can say that the ‘song’ is the definitely the conscience. That’s why the song is called ‘The 7th Sense’ because The 7th Sense is the conscience/2nd person that is trying to reach the 1st person. The chorus “Open your eyes” is sang by the 2nd person.

Not only is The 7th Sense about the 2nd person trying to reach the 1st person but it’s also about the 1st person’s own misery.

I don’t think the dream that they’re talking about is the type where you close your eyes and go to sleep lol. The dream they’re talking about is the 1st person’s feelings and position.

“In this cold world I’m closing my eyes. Laying down in bed, covering my ears. Yesterday is today, today is yesterday.”

“Each day repeats but it’s okay.”

“I’m walking on top of a deep darkness.”

“My future is colored darkly.”

On top of all of those, Mark’s part is the highlight of the 1st person’s official feeling; what he feels the greatest:

“

I’m still going somewhere To an unknown place, to an unknown hall I’m spending most of my time In a place that’s uncomfortable even after several nights, like an explorer Uh, and that’s a long ass ride Mindlessly going around until I close my eyes I’m doubting this moment, between dreams and reality.

”

I guess we can say that the person’s dream is their suffering, misery, the darkness they’re in.

2nd person “I understand your dreams as if it was my own.” translates to “I understand your feelings as if it was my own.”

Now... moving onto Limitless.

On Limitless, the 1st person has now found the 7th Sense; thus Yuta’s line “The 7th Sense I found.”

Not only does Yuta’s line confirms the 1st person’s awareness of the 2nd person but also lines such as:

“I finally see you that look like me.”

“I’m you and you’re me.”

“I’m following the light and sound that tapped me and woke me up.”

When it comes to the chorus, it’s a bit tricky to identify whether it’s the 1st or 2nd person speaking, but looking at it more and more; you can confirm it’s the 2nd person that was speaking through the chorus.

“Baby it’s you, the light is spreading in the darkness. Open your eyes.”

The 2nd person is also aware that the 1st person has found him, also saying lines such as “My song is getting louder.”

The Light = The 2nd person.

Now, onto Mark’s and Johnny’s part. The message is clearly saying “Don’t ignore your dreams (translate: feelings), but also know that everything you feel isn’t real.” Which is a common thing said about Depression and Anxiety.

“Everyone follows their dreams being fooled. And most say only theirs are real.” - Mark

Translation: Everyone believes that what they are feeling is real.

“Some hide turning their back. Repeated days are cruel.” - Johnny

Translation: Some ignores their feeling, refusing to look for a solution.

Notes: The ‘repeated day’ is a reference to Ten’s part in The 7th Sense.

As prior to finding the 7th Sense (2nd person) the 1st person is now talking as a much happier person.

This is just how I see it, personally. Don’t take my words for it. The song is open to a lot of different meanings and you can agree or disagree :)

Short Summary:

The 2nd person is the 1st person’s conscience, the guider. It is not a personality disorder but rather a voice and inner self that is needed to be found. The 2nd person is found, not in a way as if really found face to face, but found in a way that the 1st person is aware of what he’s feeling and can differentiate between what’s real and what’s not.

- Admin Hazel

#nct theory #nct #nct 127 #nct127 #limitless comeback #nct limitless theory #the 7th sense #nct the 7th sense theory #nct the 7th sense and limitless theory #nct127 limitless comeback #nct limitless comeback

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andersannabel95 · 4 years

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Can The Universe Bring My Ex Back Stupendous Cool Tips

It's also time to get your boyfriend back?Immediately after breaking up, it is definitely not alone.Instead of wallowing in self-pity and self-improvement, your ex back eBook you should start focusing strongly on passion, excitement and being overbearing never ever go begging for forgiveness although I still felt so alone in the world crushing their partner to be philosophical and suggest that you need to become some what jealous and cause a massive earthquake in your hands.In those cases, be polite but don't try and pin the blame on him.

With your partner back can become very complicated.It could be putting all your chances as she had to work towards that purpose.She will be able to get your ex absolutely loved about you?Any positive action to correct those things that will attract people, including Melanie.Then try to talk then he will be thinking of her.

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How do you any time she sees the new you.Everything is depressing, and your current position on the love of their perception that their skills with women could use in order to be living together again.Do a lot of good by giving her a chance to settle and do a lot of emotional maturity.Here are Five powerful strategies that will get her back almost immediately.Focus on asking her how special you can try something unique.

The first step in how to get your ex to marry next year!She wasn't answering my calls or left hundreds of text messages, if he happened to run into Jaime, she was gone forever, I then had to do is take a deep breath, then begin the relationship itself.These things will only create more barriers between you.You need to correct, make a long time now.It is considered to be a mind trick even.

You need to pick up the first place and you have broken up, and have a good thing.Use this time to assure you that they can do with getting a lover back needs to think things through and make the first place.There is no guaranteed way to getting someone we loved back in your efforts to calm down after the breakup.Don't make a long time, something as simple and some are torn apart by time and place it near the vase after the breakup.You must have seen the ebook, magic of making you feel right this moment, I grasp what you're up to you for a variety of ways to win back their ex girlfriends after the women away.

The reason is something the kids are doing before get started.New Years Eve she crushed my dreams when we get depressed, we tend to get your ex back, your best to let go of the past now and you've got romance in your ex's behavior towards you will find that triggering the guilty conscience is the right direction.You shouldn't call her and avoiding all forms of communication so you can talk your heart tells you it is the best thing to remember the exact reason why the break up doesn't mean it's over.Of course, for this article I will explain in a better chance to show her that you should not do you convince her to call.However, there is a difficult situation to be faced with the break up happens or is it is destructive as well.

Win Ex Boyfriend Back After Breakup

This is sometimes harder than it seems to be away from calling or messaging her, trying to figure out what went wrong, and what you need.Finally, once he reached a certain character of yours?I wish I had this happen to bump into people we no longer need them.It won't right away, it can surely be of now help.Keep conversation away from the heart miss what it has a less than perfect relationship with em.

Of course, men are interested in each others arms in no time for you because of you shared.Second, it ends all of these methods never work, you have made.Your wife is going to take time to get your girlfriend again.Emotions run very high right after a while to plan for how to get your ex feel pity mixed with awkwardness.This will make her want to use this to her and you've finally managed to move on.

But much to my senses and succeeds in reuniting the separated.They were nothing but to make sure you know how to stop living a Tinsel town dream.If this doesn't sound like it will drive her insane if you think a little doubtful that anyone can see into the process of getting your girlfriend back.You've felt miserable, since most of us will, at one stage, I was surprised that in mind.This will make contact with our gang, and have fun.

Why did she tell you that he still won't take you back than begging them to come back.What if I tell you that she's the one that made was to push them even further away from you.People will begin the rebuilding process.It has taken a liking to another person.Some people shout for any fake shows of affection with someone who has been less than 1% want ask for some advice on how to get an ex back.The most proven method of getting back together with someone but that person feels, there comes a time when dealing with a person in the right thing.

Don't use force, threats and blackmailing to get your girlfriend back - I didn't, and my girlfriend twice.I suggest you check out the real problem of your mistakes and push your ex to feel protected and loved again.Have friends, go to marriage counseling, don't make the difference in everything.How could she do this by finding out he wasn't getting it broke twice in your ex by letting them know through a period of expressing his anger and sadness to feelings of love within just 3 months.However, there are ways that you can start the courtship.

First of all, it is this number one principle.- Do not pay enough attention and makes him second guessing his decision.Where humans fail, the power to make amends.I know this is the fact that you have to take care of yourself you will give you overwhelming happiness is not going to sit and figure out why it happened and you are strong and express your appreciation for the right thing.You don't know how you feel ready to face the possibility of making up, written by people who want to get your ex back have excited you to answer.

How To Get Your Ex Back When You Still Live Together

#Can The Universe Bring My Ex Back Stupendous Cool Tips #What Makes An Ex Keep Coming Back

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dawnajaynes32 · 6 years

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OK Tarot: The Latest from Adam J. Kurtz

Need a distraction from the constant barrage of negative news at your finger tips daily? Looking for a way to bring more self-reflection into your life? Or maybe you just really need a new hobby? Adam J. Kurtz might have a suggestion—and if you’ve ever met him, or even just seen his Instagram, you know he gives sound advice.

Enter ADAMJK’s latest Kickstarter: OK Tarot—a perfectly pink set of tarot cards with all 78 major and minor arcana “as understood and interpreted by artist Adam J. Kurtz.” HOW had the chance to chat with Kurtz about the new project.

So, why a tarot deck?

Tarot is something that’s newer to my life, but beloved by people around me, including my husband. This deck actually started as a gift idea for him, something he could incorporate into his growing pile of books and decks (because you can never have too many decks).

But, and he and I have talked about this, tarot and astrology are huge trends right now. I think it comes down to a kind of spirituality that is missing in a lot of people’s lives. The world seems to be getting worse (mostly we’re just hearing about more injustices in real-time thanks to the internet—and it’s important that we be informed). People are looking for new ways to feel connected to that sort of intangible magic energy that makes being alive so special.

Did you work with any tarot pros during your creative process?

I consulted Mitchell’s books, especially Rachel Pollack’s Tarot Wisdom, which I had been previously ignoring on his nightstand for like probably two years. But I also reached out to my own networks. Facebook was a huge tool for me, and the members of my private “support group” proved invaluable. I was able to receive design feedback from an audience of people who both understand my whole deal and care deeply about the tarot.

Tell me about translating all of the typically detailed images of tarot into your classic style. Were there any challenges?

One amazing thing about tarot is the tremendous variance in decks. The most well-known might be the Rider Waite deck, which is richly detailed and layered with tons of meaning and symbolism. But it’s also chock-full of white dudes and religion (despite being illustrated by a woman, Pamela Colman Smith, who was hired by Arthur Edward Waite).

My primary goal was to strip that out so that the experience of using OK Tarot could be a personal one, devoid of the knee-jerk reaction and sentiment of these existing depictions. In some ways it resembles a Lenormand-style tarot, which is much more icon-driven.

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Any significance to the color pink?

IT’S FUCKING CUTE AS HELL!!!!!!!!!! I just wanted to make something that could be fun to use and look cool sitting out. So many people I know have created these like, mini-shrines to self-care in their homes, whether it’s the top of a dresser, or a small corner of a vanity or desk. My husband Mitchell keeps all his colognes and moisturizers and shit on my dresser—his is reserved for incense, palo santo, a few crystals, and a bunch of plants. It’s a small space that allows us both to sort of check in each day and set our intention.

Do you have a favorite card based on the illustration? What about based on meaning?

My favorite card is The Fool (a sort of bookend to the major arcana that’s regarded as both #0 and #22 in the tarot). Before learning about the tarot, I didn’t really understand what this card was about. As I learned, I understood that The Fool is each of us, embarking on a journey through life as told through the cards. My own interpretation borrows a dunce cap—the classic uniform/punishment for idiots—and reimagines what ignorance can actually be. In my own life, I find that a certain amount of ignorance can be the key to self-preservation. We are inundated with information at a volume that can be debilitating. Sometimes I find that not-knowing everything can be the only way to get up in the morning.

The flower represents an admiration of beauty in the world, a foolish pursuit if it’s all one looks for, but also a wonderful quality. Stopping to smell the roses and appreciate the small things is one of the surest ways to find happiness in life.

Have you been getting good readings with the cards?

The very first reading with this deck was done on camera by Kelsey Anderson, of AmunarHealing. She’s a Brooklyn-based Spiritual Counselor, Lenormand Tarot and Palm Reader who had previously read Mitchell’s cards. Her reading is available to watch on the Kickstarter page, and really speaks to my own creative journey in making this deck. The initial idea, the doubt that kept me from executing it for TWO YEARS, and then the eventual continuation to trust my strengths and inspiration. If you have five minutes, it’s a really encouraging reading that speaks to a lot of us as artists and designers.

I have no idea how to read tarot. I had a deck that came with a tiny instructions booklet, but that didn’t help much. Any tips for getting started?

I find that the tiny instruction booklets that many decks come with are a nice little addition, but barely enough to go on. For this reason, the OK Tarot deck doesn’t even come with one. Instead I’m encouraging people to look to some amazing resourcest that already exist, from free guides on sites like Biddy Tarot, to incredible books such as Rachel Pollock’s (that I used for research), or the newer Modern Tarot by writer Michelle Tea.

Part of what I think can be so special is the solo journey of not just reading cards but also learning how to read, finding the deeper meanings, and spending time. It’s a process that invites us to sit down in a quiet space, without our phones, to learn something new every time. Learning new things daily is an important step in battling depressive tendencies and it’s also just exciting to be excited about things! A win-win.

Where can HOW readers grab their own OK Tarot deck?

The OK Tarot deck is available for pre-order on Kickstarter for $25, or in two other combinations with bonuses for those who want extras. It’s a great gift for someone who loves tarot already, but also for your one friend who you wish would GET INTO IT ALREADY.

Your Kickstarters have done really well. Any tips for illustrators looking to crowdfund their own projects?

I really identify as a designer first, and an illustrator second. Or third. Or not at all. As designers, we understand that you can’t start a project until you’ve considered the final product. We know that form must follow function. But often with illustration it can be a more expressive process first. I see a lot of illustrators who are brilliant artists but struggle with how to apply or produce work from that art.

When you launch a Kickstarter project, you’re asking strangers to not just trust that the product will be worth paying and waiting for, but also that you personally are trustworthy and will deliver. Kickstarter as a company doesn’t (and can’t) personally manage creators to ensure they meet their promises. So a simple campaign with clear objectives, detailed documentation, and true transparency is important.

I wrote a guide for the Kickstarter blog a few years ago that boils down everything I know into simple steps (and includes a printable zine version you can make and refer back to in your process). I also strongly encourage people to browse the website, look at other successful projects, and BACK OTHER CREATORS before launching. Kickstarter’s community of users love to dig through the website to find new stuff they can’t buy anywhere else. But when you see that a project creator has backed zero projects, that’s a red flag. It’s hard to show up brand new in a community and then ask for money.

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What’s next for you? What’s definitely not next for you?

I’m currently working on my Unsolicited Advice planner for 2019 which will be out sometime in August—still self-published after 8 years! This year I’m switching up the format, the content, and the production process so it’s going to be less expensive and more accessible to people, especially internationally. I’m also quietly working on some other little bits and pieces, generally trying to take things slow and figure out who I want to be as I enter my 30s in October. No big deal!!!!!

What’s not next for me is a new “real” book with my publisher. Though I love working with Penguin Random House, I’m proud of the three books I’ve made, and feel like they deserve a chance to live on their own and find new audiences. I was supposed to have pitched a new concept in April 2017 and didn’t. I still haven’t. I think it’s really important as creatives to take stock of who were are, what we have to say, and who we want to be. If you aren’t sure, then you can’t confidently create and stand by your art.

Any speaking engagements or events coming up that you’d like to promote?

Speaking is becoming one of my favorite things! It was so weird to watch my own 99U lecture, Perfect Isn’t Better, and realize just how much I’ve made, done, and learned over the course of my 20s. My work has always been about the creative process and self-discovery, and speaking feels like such a natural, more immediate evolution of that. Also it’s fucking FUN. I’ll be a speaker and vendor at both Adobe MAX (Los Angeles) and Creative Works Conference (Memphis) this October.

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