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#but u gotta look at me like im food and u havent eaten in a week
thirstyvampyr · 15 days
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Holy fuck
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avo-kat · 1 year
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cleaning up makes me feel like a sim its so fucking maddening and im actually honestly trying to do shit as effectively as possible yknow because time is short and could be used instead on watching another pokemon red speedrun instead so i stand in the room trying to analyze the different problems putting everything in categories usually trash is first gather all trash and put it into the trash can oh but the trash is full where are the trash bags so u look around everywhere and step over dirty clothes so u pick them up throw them into the hamper oh the bathroom mirror is dirty af quickly clean that oh u gotta bring ur dish soap back into the kitchen so u go into the kitchen and remember still no trash bags crap so u put ur bottles of condiments back into the fridge and instead decide to wash dishes but no still no trash bags cant scrape the dried off cat food off of them so back u go oh theres boxes on the floor gotta make them small and put them into the cardboard bag to bring outside later oh the shoes need to be put properly onto the shoe rock oh ur scarf fell down hang that up on the wardrobe and wow the shoes are so disoragnized and its becoming winter better take out the summer shoes and rearrange the winter shoes u go into ur closet by the kitchen to put away the summer shoes and u stand there for a moment wondering what u wanted to do u see ur hammer on the shelf right exactly time to hammer in a nail into the wall to hang up ur pinboard where are ur fucking nails oh you used them for ur craft project back into ur room oh there are the trash bags on your bookshelf lol ok back to gathering trash now u can scrape off food but u dont wanna thats the most boring and ew shit ever so u go into the bathroom to pee and quickly clean the sink because ur alrdy there and gather up ur laundry and put it into the washing machine oh u gotta strip ur bed so u go back to ur room but man arent u tired u are so tired so u sit down and start a video but not the pokemon speedrun no thats reserved for later as a reward for relaxing this is just a quick break and for background noise u start playing on ur phone and scrolling tumblr and suddenly its an hour later and u realize u havent started laundry but u still gotta strip ur bed ok fuck u can do it so u just do it and leave it bare and hope u can do it b4 bed so u start laundry and ugh dishes but no better vacuum ur room so u do that but first u gotta pick up shit and dust ur table and shelf wheres the fucking duster is it in the laundry u walk around everywhere oh its in the bathroom u pick it up head back now u need a wet cloth where is it ok nowehrre get a new one oh hey the nails are in the closet after all uhhhhh now u dont wanna hang anything ok back to ur room time to dust but first check ur phone or discord or tumblr ok half an hour later time to dust u move everything aside and dust ur shelf and desk and then ur cat is hungry ok u go and clean the dishes and feed ur cat man now ur really hungry too ok so u gotta make some food but ugh its so annoying and boring what can u even eat ok pop smth frozen into the oven thats fine cant clean b4 you have eaten obv so u sit down watch videos browse the internet food done yay u eat and relax some more finally finally u get up to vacuum oh the laundry is done ok lemme just clean the toilet quick boy arent u tired u sit down and browse tumblr oh damn the laundry is done ok but u first wanna clean the litter boxes so u do that and maybe clean the bathtub ok now ur really tired and its so late time for bed oh no the bed is bare and laundry still needs to be hung up sigh
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theforce · 4 years
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presumptive horrible rotten case of corona: symptoms
presumptive bc i couldnt get a god damn test i live in new york and while there are testing sites all over the state and our state govt is doing what they can now, i don’t want to be the person taking away a test from someone else especially now that i am mostly better, most of this went down at the beginning of the month and i’m still dealing with the effects of it. 
there was a lot of confusion here even as recent as 2 weeks and we are the state that’s testing more than the rest of the entire country so here is my account of what went down w me, and honestly, what might go down with you or someone you know as soon as this reaches your state
1) i threw up all night long, thought it was a stomach virus, had a lot of stomach issues for like 24 hours, very strange i haven’t had a stomach virus in YEARS since i was a literal child, anyways right before i started puking up my life i developed this weird cough, it felt like it was from my throat, like i was trying to clear it? but it was often and annoying 
2) after my 24 hours of hell i felt feverish and exhausted but i chalked it up to being on the floor of the bathroom all night, exerting my esophagus and body to throw up the devil himself, i tried to sleep it off, i woke up a few hours later in a fog, i was shivering but i was also burning up, i couldn’t tell left from right, up from down, my fever was 100.3, at this point i had my mom call my doctor and make an appointment, she made it for me w the receptionist, everything was fine until 20 minutes later i got a call back from my actual doctor not the receptionist who was like, oh no not you’re not coming here with those symptoms baby and i was like ?? ok cool thanks, she said to keep watching my symptoms, slam some tylenol and if i felt shortness of breath to call or text her personal cell phone and she would get me set up at the nearest hospital i said ok sounds fucked up i mean i didn’t say that bc i was too fucked up to even speak, she also gave my mom instructions to keep me in my room, to not go near me, to give me a designated bathroom, to have food and water delivered to my door, my mom was like u dont gotta tell me twice (she has lupus) during this time my cough become dry and horrible, i could feel my lungs rattle, i would cough so hard and for so long i’d wake from my feverish coma to kneel over my bed and just let loose on the world, it felt like i was drowning, i couldn’t get enough air everything hurt, everything was sore 
3) things continued on like this for 5 straight days, i was literally in and out of consciousness, my fever got up to 102 and my mom said that if it raised at all from there we were going to the fuckin hospital and i was like listen la rona i know u wanna take me out but i havent even ever eaten a krispy kreme donut, please let me survive this i can’t leave this way, in that moment i literally had a fever dream of god herself, i said take this from me and i’ll stop being such a cunt in life. i started slamming hot toddy’s, i’d drink as much water as possible in between the time i wasnt literally trying to expel my lungs by way of my mouth
4) woke up from that whole ordeal drenched in SWEAT from my feet to my head i was soaked, it was gross, at that point i still had a sense of smell so let me tell you my last and final symptom should have kicked in a bit earlier but i checked my temp and it was normal! i didn’t feel like my head was going to explode! but i had new things going on i had a new stuffy/runny nose, my cough was producing some liquid which i proceeded to throw up into a mcdonalds cup i took a shower, i brushed my teeth, i felt like a brand new woman, i had cold like symptoms but i can live with cold like symptoms, i had an appetite for the first time in a week, felt like i could eat my whole family out of house and home given the opportunity, i’d lost 20 pounds in less than 2 weeks and ya girl was honestly, looking good but THAT’S A BAD WAY OF THINKING disregard please thank you, at this point i went into my doctor with a full on mask, gloves, hair pulled back, she gave me every test you can think of, most importantly a flu test which is all she could do since getting a test was impossible at this pint, which of course came back negative 
5) things continued like this for weeks, up until right now actually, exhaustion was gone, fever gone, cough still here and there but not like how it was, i’ve put on makeup in my room, i’ve watched every season of law and order svu, i’ve gone on drives in my car just to drive, i’ve tried to keep myself as busy as possible, 3 days ago the strangest, most inexplicable and hopefully last symptom arrived, a complete loss of smell and bc of that taste, i’ve tried smelling candles, essential oils, laundry detergent, canned meat, my brother lit a match with my back turned and asked me what the smell was, i ate extra hot cheetos, raw onions, shot of vinegar, there’s nothing there, i just hope it comes back 
during this time i haven’t been even close to my mother, who has lupus or my sister, who has asthma, i stayed in my room, i’m still in my room actually 14 full days out from the last time i left the house, one month since this whole thing started, i eat in my room, i use a different bathroom than my whole family, everyone talks to me from my door frame besides my little brother who also was sick but recovered super fast, he bleaches the bathroom after i use it, he puts all my food on single use plates, he brings me jugs of water and reminds me of what it’s like to at least talk to another person. 
on a more serious note, i haven’t touched another person in 20 days nobody has even been within 6 feet of me besides my doctor who was administering the only tests she could administer, fully decked out in a hazmat suit, she was scared for me, i could tell, she was trying to put on a brave face and downplay the severity of my symptoms but thank god for her, she’s checked up on me, she’s tried everything, she’s put in calls, she’s made herself as available as possible even though she’s probably going through the same thing with countless other patients, i worry for her, i’ve worried for my family, i’ve stressed beyond the point of no return which has for sure slowed my recovery and i was one of the lucky ones! all of this and my case was considered mild because i never really had trouble breathing beyond being choked by my own coughing. 
people have been there for me during all of this, in ways that are further reaching than touch, i have been very vocal about not liking when people touch me but i do look forward to the day i can hug my mom, where i can tell my friend to take a sip of my drink to see if she likes it, to have someone pat me on the shoulder and tell me to keep my head up or whatever 
hopefully im on the other side of this, my more at risk family members are about to be 14 days from the last time any of them were near me or my brother, they’re at the end of a long tunnel and i’m just so happy that maybe soon we’ll all see the light 
take care of yourselves
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solidburnreturned · 5 years
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by popular demand, here is my oc chatter regarding stuff like relationships n random character traits. its rly long oops but i divided it by character at least lmao,, these are all things that i think id also wanna use if i ever use these characters as humans (which i def will at some point honestly)
- i thinkkkk i want toad and pike to date. toad would come across pike in their lagoon one day while hes wandering around on another wonked exploration and pike is like hey lol :B with their pointy teeth and long ass hair and toad is like :0 he just sits and talks with pike for hours and comes by a few times a week to hang out with them. they fall in LOVE
- fred and lani are def gonna date too. two butches who use he/him pronouns fuck yeah? they have a powerful relationship. mega BDE. power couple. not a lot of pda but alone together theyre both very loving and tender, its a vulnerability thing for both of them. like lani is very cool and can be either stoic or borderline obnoxious while fred is punkish. fred is very head over heels for lani tho 
- mardi n berg.....complicated....i gotta figure out how they actually end up together. berg is a jogger and mardi is a piercer/tattoo artist so that doesnt....make them line up very much in that department. ill think about it more and figure something out. itll probably have something to do with berg’s nose stripes and eye rings
- also side note on mardi......i want his backstory to include a grey period set off by his brother being eaten when they were both young at the troll tree. like he becomes angry and depressed, sorta like branch, his tattoos that he gives himself the only color on his body, until he learns to let go and his colors come back (high key this was inspired by 21 savage, mardi’s voice claim, and the line in his new song A Lot “my brother lost his life and it turned me to a beast”). ill develop this idea further but i just wanted to get it written down
- bismuth.......unsure. they had a crush on pepper and kept trying to ask her out until she came out to them as a lesbian, then they were like :’) but theyre ride or die theyre not gonna be an ass to her because they cant date her. they just care a lot about her. its like icarly
- gazpacho and jupiter CUTE two small trans trolls in That Love. i need to develop them more but. theyre just cute 
- talia is still a little too new for me to develop her......but im thinkin about it...
- kinda same with ernie and olive. they kinda mostly just exist as cute babby characters right now? if anything olive is a trouble maker and ernie is a chatterbox
- clem and thursday also fuckin cute as hell......clem was a nervous wreck asking thursday out but theyve been together like ever since, which is more than a few years. they have a rly cute gentle lovey dovey relationship. thursday is usually hanging around up on her gf’s shoulder giving her kisses on the cheek
- bea and crystal.......adorabl relationship......crystal is another character thats kinda nervous but bea is so chill n confident is helps calm her down. theyre both trans and love the hell out of each other. rly slow n steady relationship, bea is very patient
- pj and marcus!!!! dumb mlm rep relationship. pj is so so gay for marcus he can barely comprehend it. its a dumb ego boost for marcus but hes also very in love with pj, he just expresses it in a weird cocky way idk marcus is a nerd. i need to make more content for them i think about these two way more than it seems
- dwight!! he has a boat. he lives on the boat.....ive thought about maybe pairing him with toad and pike. deciding on his voice claim has been the most difficult thing ever
- kass and current HELL yeah buff gf and tol gf......they spar with swords and wrestle for fun and hang out at the beach a lot. kass fuckin loves the gem on current’s back. i gotta make more content for them 
- celia......i wanna do more with celia. friends with berg probs theyre both sporty. shes just a sweet giant troll who loves mushrooms. i gotta pair her with someone whose palette goes nicely with her pastels 
- carrot and harriet are literally cricket and tilly from big city greens just older. yeehaw siblings. havent thought about relationship stuff with harriet yet.....i think she also needs ANOTHER redesign her colors are just too heavy still. maybe if i can make her colors compliment celia’s that could work as a pairing? hm hm.....carrot tho is dating ford’s oc rye theyre gentle country gays
- rainer. hm. i dont think theyre rly the dating type......theyre just chill with being them. they just wanna swim and be funny
- hammond and andromeda are probs two of my least developed characters.....hammond still needs a redesign. he might be cute to pair with walter, theyre around the same age. andromeda tho i have no idea. she might be a nice pairing with eve? if i ever feel like pairing her with someone...who knows. eve is very carefree and might find andromeda’s energy too intense
- radish i wanna make more content for!! i rly like her a lot....i think shes another troll who isnt interested in dating. shes very focused on being a chef instead. loves her friends a lot!
- mack and pepper 2gether 4ever obvs......they have a relationship that gets richer with age for sure
- im just gonna ramble about mack. i thinkkkkkkk i wanna make her half latina? columbian specifically. she doesnt quite read as white and i didnt make her with the intention of making her white. anyway i love mack a whole lot and should really develop her backstory more. its not rly as like...””tragic”” or whatever as pepper’s i know that but she def has layers. i wanna give her whole family more depth. she has a very complicated relationship with her own feelings and motivations that i need to think about more fully. my powerful femme tho i lov her
- mack’s parents, robin and champagne, i need to like....think about them more. they have kinda a comedic relationship thats sorta inspired by roger rabbit and jessica rabbit. robin is a very caring, gentle troll who’s very smart and cares a lot about his nursing responsibilities in the village. champagne is very relaxed and the “voice of reason” character of the family. she loves a good party and has her party planning down to a science. both are very successful power parents. kickass family
- i already talked about topaz and marney in a separate post but i still love them both so much. big wesbiabs
- pepper....pebber. im gonna talk about her the most obviously gfhjdkrs i wanna talk about her mental health i feel like i think about it a lot but i never write about it explicitly? this is gonna be long oops hgjfksd she has depression and ptsd stemming from the trauma of her crash...im thinking she also has adhd and thats just something shes always had. her depression rly got heavy during her recovery and right after like...she hated being bed/housebound and felt rly powerless to her situation and just let it eat at her until her personality had actually changed considerably. like extroverted wild child rebel to introverted, soft-spoken sulker. this got better with time but she still is pretty introverted, just turned her moodiness into chill energy. 
- she has bad depression habits like letting dishes, old food, laundry, or just stuff pile up in her room until it gets overwhelming and she spends like two days just manically cleaning; or staying in bed for way longer than she should and messing with her hygiene; or eating way more or way less than she should eat in a day. just stuff thats hard to completely break out of when youre recovering. her color is pretty consistently the dark red but if shes having a particularly rough day she might look a little paler, or like a muddy brick color at her worst. thats kinda rare tho
- her ptsd is the thing she hates the most. for a while it made her feel very weak and she’d beat herself up over being traumatized by the crash which was obviously not helpful to her mental state but she was really all over the place during her bodily recovery. its part of the reason why she started working out, she wanted to reclaim some sort of feeling of strength and power that she felt she’d lost completely. she still gets really frustrated with this feeling of loss but she gets a lot of support from loved ones which has helped her not self-blame so much. her ptsd manifests mostly as nightmares/insomnia, chronic headaches/stomachaches, intrusive thoughts and sometimes flashbacks. the nightmares are what rly get to her, she really doesnt get a lot of good sleep and it can get to the point where she just doesnt want to sleep sometimes and she’ll stay awake until she crashes hard
- her scars used to be a big trigger for her ptsd, which is why she has her bangs covering the one on her face and wears long pants (her knee braces are too bulky for pants and would force her to wear shorts which would force her to expose her scars). she just. really really hates them. this is something she struggles with for a majority of her life
- once she and mack start going steady with their dating and start consistently sleeping in the same bed, pepper starts to sleep better. she still has nightmares that wake her up at least weekly, but having mack there to comfort her (whether she wakes mack up accidentally or if mack is already awake) helps a TON with getting her back to sleep soundly. it also just helps her sleep in general to have that comforting, loving presence in her bed snuggled up to her ;w; mack is a big help in general with pepper’s mental health, pushing pepper to make better, healthier choices and get out in the village more and have fun. mack for sure does not “”cure”” pepper of anything but shes a very positive light in pepper’s life that helps her pull thru tough times!
- i love all my goofy trolls so much. its so fun to just chill and blab about them to relax between working on big projects ;o; ty if u cared enough to read this whole thing ur so rad
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saveme-ruinme · 7 years
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Boyfriend Hyungwon
A/N: this was requeeeeested bc u can do that guys idk what to write give me ideas pls thank u also nsfw ahead mostly fluff but im always too thirsty for my own good
tall lanky bf thats way too good looking
Sucks when you got your period bc you cant look at him without crying bc hes so handsome
Dunno if youre crying bc youre so happy about being with hyungwon or crying bc hes too handsome and you feel ugly
Laughs when you get like that, hugging you against his body
Always smells nice so hugging his is really nice
So is kissing him
Sometimes you will ask for a kiss or hug and hyungwon will walk up to you like hes gonna do it then will dab and walk away laughing
Always come back saying sorry tho and making it up to you so you dont punch him in the throat
boy has got some nice ass lip they are so thick and pink and are probably soft as hell
Tbh makeouts with hyungwon are something that happens often
Just sittin on his lap grinding down onto him while his tongue is in your mouth and his hands digging into your skin
This got sexual so early whoops lmao
Lets keep this goin tho
Maaaaan i feel like hyungwon would willing to try anything
Like hes not that versed in kinky shit but is down to try anything you wanna try
So do ya boy and favor and introduce him to e v e r y t h i n g bc u know hes lowkey freaky he just dont know it yet
Or he does he just hasn’t had a chance ;) ;) ;)
But when its not like that hes slow and seductive using his good looks against you to turn you to mush
Its the worst but the best thing ever
Probably enjoys making you suffer aka either teasing the shit outta you and not letting you come or overstimulating you to tears
Laughs at you begging and whining pretending like hes doing nothing wrong
Highkey loves making you choke on his cock
Nice aftercare tho
Cleans you up and hugs you close and tries to make you laugh
hes so dumb will make stupid faces at you from across the room
And you gotta make them back ofc
So you two end up looking like idiots making dumb faces at each other and giggling and anybody who happens to witness is just like ?????? What the fuck??????
Its cool just pretend like nothing happened hyungwon is good looking so no one else believes it when they see him being normal
But then ur sitting there like gdi hyungwon now i look like an idiot by myself how dare u
And hyungwons just like mmm get rekt hun ;)
Dont take him on fancy dates dont do it he looks too good and will overshadow u
I mean do it bc he looks hella good but be prepared for everybody and their mother to be looking at him and forgetting about you
Like the waitress comes up all starry eyed focussing on hyungwon asking him what he wants and just being too much
And ur sitting like mm yes can i have some fucking respect back tf away hes mine knife emoji
Hyungwon laughs but promises to eat u out when u get home for putting up with it
Naaaaappppsss
Couple naps are a thing
Its gr8 bc some days when you dont wanna go out and youre tired hyungwons like yeah lets watch movies and sleep its a date
And youre like its not a date but fine im down
I read somewhere that napping with someone builds trust so there u go nap a lot with hyungwon and he might pour his soul out to you
You gotta take care of him bc hes lowkey useless and a whiny baby
I mean he works a lot so its not entirely unwarranted its just annoying
Bc when hes sick hes like noooo im fine i dont need u to take care of me im a man i can do it
And ur like u sound like ur dying i bet u havent eaten yet bc u dont want to get out of bed
He gets quiet at that so u go over and take care of him then he turns into the worst always whining at you and asking u to do things for him and its make u like ugh i knew i shouldve just let u die
Which makes hyungwon dramatically gasp that turns into a coughing fit and when its over hes like how dare u say that look i almost died you break my heart
And ur just like hyungwon…………. oh my fucking god
But when hes not being dramatic or dumb hes being super sweet bc he takes ur relationship seriously
Like doesnt forget things at all and always surprises you with nice things bc he has very high standards he holds himself at
And ur like hyungwon its cool you dont have to try so hard i really dont mind
But hes adamant about being the perfect boyfriend so will pay for you and buy you nice things and take you on nice dates
Its almost like a dream honestly
But your fave part is when its lowkey between the two of you
Like chillin at your place eating takeout with no makeup wearing sweats and talking about everything under the sun
Those are the nicest moments bc those are the realest
No need to be attractive or act a certain way toward each other
Just two people who love each other talking from the heart
Thats the first time he said he loved you was in a situation like because you guys were just talking about your relationship
Not being overly serious or expecting anything just talking about each other saying what you liked about each other and what annoyed you
He accidentally said that he loved the way you liked his stupid side as much as his idol side bc a lot of ppl see him as a pretty face and he does enjoy it but thats not all there is too him
And ur heartbroke a little for him but then u were like wait…. u love me?
Hyungwon gets all sheepish and starts to blush like ………. yeah i guess i do
It feels like your soaring through the heavens and u yell it back at him and accidentally spill your food all over the couch squashing it between the two of you when you go to hug him
He immediately tells you he wants to break up for ruining his expensive sweatpants
You punch him on the arm
Hes kinda the type to hold in his bad feelings so u always gotta break him out of that and make him comfortable so he will tell whats wrong
Always does. May take a while but always tells you.
Once he trusts you he really does trust you
Thats when he becomes serious with you and lets you know hes in it for the long run
This highkey made me emotional
HYUNGWON IS MORE THAN A MEME AND A VISUAL OKAY GUYS HE HAS FEELINGS
AND I HAVE FEELINGS AND THEY ARE MAKING ME SAD
VOTE FOR MONSTA X I WANT THEM TO HAVE THEIR FIRST WIN
ALSO APPRECIATE HYUNGWON GIVE HIM MORE LINES
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Chapter Two: Thicker than Water Walking Dead
Clementine Sits on the trailer hearing walkers from outside. She heard gunshots from outside. Hey i saw you ran into there come on out said Molly. Clem holds her knife out. Listen to me if u want to survive come with me or die  i couldnt care less said Sam Clem grabs aj and ran with molly. Holy shit your a girl and you got a kid with you said Sam. Yeah i know i protecting him with my life cuz his parents are dead said Clementine. Aj looks at clem. Well you dont have to tell everybody clem said aj. Sorry she wanted to know about it so i have to tell her. Yeah but im a bit sad said aj. I mean you right....but its hard to say i understand. He nodded and contuined walking. We not far from my group said sam. They walk a bit longer and saw there people there. Who the new girl said Zack. This is Clementine and little guy name AJ said Sam. Well its nice to meet you Clementine and aj said Joe. Mhmm nice to meet yall too. Come on we gotta go said sam. Where we going ask clementine. Up north Going a place called King Star. King star ask clementine? Yea rumor said there food water hot baths n a great wall feels like home to be honest. said Zack. We dont know untill we go up there said Joe. Well sounds like a good place lets go then said Aj. They walk a path to the north. About 5 days later they saw a Cabin. We could stay here until tomorrow said Sam. they walk inside checks 4 walkers n Sees where the place safe. They sits down around the lanter. Well Its cozy than being out there said zack. Yeah it is said Clementine. Clem i have a qestion ask Sam. What is it? How did you survive out there all by yourself? Well i didnt survive by myself Me my friend his dad and his Dad friend helps me survive out there. Whats there names ask joe. The dad friend name Kenny  and the kid dad name Lee there was best friend always got each other back. Like brotherhood said Sam. The kid was mine age His Name was Tromane Hes the one always keep on me we have each other backs, we was like two peas in the pod, Fighting...Surviving.Its how i survive the outside world. Tromane helps me survive even when i was about to give up. said clementine If you dont mind asking.....how did they died ask Joe. Joe thats fuck up man...said zack. No its fine. Kenny died from a car crash by me he was showing me how to drive gear and i lost controlled and bump into the tree he save my life and got...eaten. Lee was bit He save my life by being a badass went through a herd of walkers and he helps me and tromane out from this...marsh house....Tromane saves my life too.....I fell down from walkers hes came out of no where n helps me up. I was on his back n he was carring me to safety. Until he got tired n fell down. He told me to take care of kenny and aj n i ran. He fought off the walkers when we got seperated. I havent seen nor heard of him snice. said clementine. I-Im sorry clem said Sam Yeah im sorry to hear about them they sounds like good people. Yeah they where I just hope that they up there in heaven and having a good time. I open my eyes and Looks around. Another day....Another life in hell my friend. 
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