#come into my lady door

[mybreadsmybutters]

when i was a kid i wanted to be a famous youtuber like dan and phil so that people would gay ship me with my irl best friend and we would be sooo weirded out by it and laugh and make videos joking about it but secretly it would make her realize her repressed gay crush on me and i'd help her through her gay crisis and then we would have a sickeningly sweet sappy romance and read fanfiction about ourselves together... anyways just found out she's married to a guy in the mafia now so i probably don't have a chance

#dan and phil fanfiction changed me #come into my lady door #and teen me saw that and went “i need to be that so fuckan bad” #i wanted to be dan but now that im a mature adult i understand that phil is better. phil guy 5ever nowadays #do i tag this as dan and phil. i still dont know tumblr site tagging norms and im like a year in now #dan and phil #dnp #phan

[lulady030]

I haven't seen any version of that meme with these two yet, so I decided to do it myself.

#my art #The Case Study of Vanitas #Vanitas no Carte #Veronica de Sade #Lady Archiviste #<- still tagging her like this to keep it (mostly) spoiler-free #Apologies to all my followers this is what I come back with after like 4 months ;v; #in my defense my favorite mangaka did the equivalent of kicking down the door waving a giant pride flag in her latest chapter #and I had to get this out of my brain somehow #*bows* I shall now go back to being absolutely demolished by school. Have a nice evening :')

[chrollohearttags]

a good month for me (a spooky bitch who loves Halloween and dressing up). A bad month for me. (A bitch with severe arachnophobia to the point I get panic attacks)

#cw spiders #cause why the manager at the family dollar that’s like an auntie to me gone ask my brother why I hadn’t been coming in #mind you it’s a giant ass sp**er at the front door #and then yesterday in the dollar tree my dad scared me with one and I started crying! 😭 #this lady has known me for 11 years and I tell her every year during October I won’t be coming in #and he ain’t no I feared them that bad #like man be fucking fr!! sjsjdjdh #like this bout to be my villain origin story #cherry chats 🍒

[rhinestonecowdoy]

Cass & Dani: *lights up some fat blunts*

Bela: Just what the HELL are you two doing?

Daniela: Gettin' crunk and absolutely smackooed. Wanna join?

Bela: ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! This is not how mother raised us-

Cass: *blows smoke at Bela*

Bela: *coughs* You little bastard! MOTHER HELP *runs to her mama* Cassandra smoked weed at me and I think I'm high now!!!

Lady D: *smokes a massive joint* Nice to meet you, High, I'm Mom.

Bela: 👁️👄👁️

#Cass: whos gonna tell her thats not how weed works? #Dani: *sticks two blunts in her mouth* Im ALCIIINA DIMITRESCU Head bitch in charge. oooo no my ass is stuck in the door again boo hoo #Bela: WHERE DID ALL THIS WEED COME FROM?! Heisenberg: *sweats* #its bullshit hours and i needed the cringe out of me stat #alcina dimitrescu #cassandra dimitrescu #daniela dimitrescu #bela dimitrescu #re8 meme #dimitrescu family #lady d making dad jokes bc shes the momdad of the house #house dimitrescu

[inkyshark]

I am currently working at a Goodly William thrift store as a cashier and I have had a time of it.

Anyway, I was checking this customer out and she had two cds: a metal band I can't recall and Hilary Duff. I asked if she had checked the cds, she hadn't, so I checked and said that the Hilary Duff had a skip ring on it, but it wasn't bad and should play okay.

She said 'Oh, that's fine. I collect them for the aesthetics. They're so cool, like some sort of lost technology.' and inflicted psychic damage on me. I just paused for a second and I'm glad I at least had a face mask on to hide the confusion, read her total, and had to tell her we don't have a tap reader.

I need a new job asap...

#inky talks #I think that's my chatter tag #I have a few other stories but today was a day and only 4 hrs #Not a bad day just a day #Everyone there bosses included act their wage cause our manager only makes 18.60 and i make 15.75 so no one cares #I called it that cause i don't want people to find it in the main tags #One of my bosses chased someone out of the store and shouted don't come back out the doors #Oh and someone pepper sprayed themselves outside the store and had to run in and use the defunct fountain #Paramedics were called and managers were peeved it made a mess they had to clean and the lady's friend came up and asked for baby shampoo #I was like uh we don't take those as donations but we have some blue dawn dish soap and she said no it had to be gentle #And like gave me a confused and disappointed stare when i suggested she go to the target down the road like lady this is a goodwill

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Quirky representations of dementia should go die actually

#pardon me my friends i know I'm in a Good Mood today and will probably continue to be once I've taken some time to be mad/sad #but god the other night our ex-neighbour was obvs trying to comfort me #by talking bout a lady with dementia she knew who was onviously sick but in her mind she went out and did things and danced #and i was at the dinner table with my own sick lady #and therefore could not say honey. good for her i guess. #but my mum is almost aggressively trapped in her here and now #she doesn't know how to exist without us #her safe person is the husband her marriage was failing with #if we go out for five minute she panics and scratches at the door #she is sad and confused 95% of the time #content and confused the other 5% #and i can barely even visualise her as my mum anymore #because the mum who raised me would've killed herself if she knew this was coming #(like she used to tell me that. frequently tell her small child she'd rather kill herself than be unable to look after herself) #(which had a very normal impact on me I'm sure) #anyway. I'm a huge hypocrite and will still go and listen to marbles by the amazing devil and think it's the loveliest most romantic thing #and maybe some people do get lucky and find some joy in their minds when they have nothing else #but i have to just watch her brain fester and decay every day and there's just nothing quirky or beautiful about it #and all i can think is about how there's those mums who don't like raising small kids but enjoy parenthood when the kids are grown #and how that was supposed to be her #for a little while it was her #for a brief window of a couple of years she and i were each others best friend #and now she's this sad scared anxious thing shaped like my mum #who doesn't trust me as much as the man she was maybe a year or two out from leaving #and she's trapped in her brain and swiftly rotting #and it's just not cute and it's not funny #anyway #it is what it is #mr. bees speaks

[ryanstillwrites-if]

How would the ROs react to getting home super late and being greeted by a very sleepy mc hugging them and saying "I missed you"?

Adelaide: she doesn't say anything as she kisses their forehead and hugs them back for a long while. after she pulls away, she takes their hand in hers and leads them to the bedroom where she pulls them down onto the bed with her and falls asleep in their arms.

Hayden: their face softens as they pull them into their arms. "missed you too," they say. "i'm sorry i kept you waiting." they take the mc to bed, tucking them in before going to change into their pajamas and do their nightly routine.

Gabriel: immediately, he sweeps them up into his arms, kissing them sweetly before carrying them to bed. he doesn't want to be away from them for any amount of time so he simply strips out of his clothes and joins them in bed, hugging them close to his chest.

Jordan: smiling at the mc, they hug them back. "and i missed you," they tell them, kissing their cheek. "now let's get you to bed." they take a shower and change in more comfortable clothes, checking up on the mc and pressing a soft kiss to the forehead. they continue to do some work in the living or dining room, only crawling into bed in the early hours of the morning.

Mavis/Maverick: they squeeze the mc in a hug, kissing their face all over before going to bed with them. they're not at all tired so they lay next to the mc, watching them sleep for a while before they eventually drift off themself.

#these are all lowkey the same #i don't know how else a person would react in this situation though #maybe because i'm always the mc #waiting dutifully by the door for my gracious lady to come home #like the good house boyfriend i am #not yet house husband but i'm working on it #just you wait😤 #ro: adelaide scholz #ro: hayden della rocca #ro: gabriel torres #ro: jordan michaels #ro: mavis/maverick chen #more than me #more questions more answers

[citrusitonit]

RANT !!!

i remember the people who caught up just as the shop was closing and we were having trouble bexause we had to turn the lights back on and get the keys again from the back and rearrange the boxes so they could see the display and they just kept saying "its just a littlw bother just bear with it" and didnt even give us the exact change we had to reopen the counter and cashier again and they just kept saying its "just a little bother and we can bear with it" i hope that every day they trip and crash on their face

#they always complain abt how we close too early SHUT UP #SORRY WE DONT OPEN UNTIL THE DEAD OF NIGJT LAURA #Its because we alr have our bags outside and every light is off and all the boxes are piled up inside #and they just come and say 'no no no open it i still have to get something' #we cant even say 'we' re closed' bc theyll still grab a product and put it on the counter #Ugh #it just made me angry at how the guy in specific #judt kept saying “whats the price of this whats the price of that” #and then when we asked if he could give the exact payment amount #bc otherwise we'd have to go all the way to the back just to get the keys again an unlock all the lights n doors #he just gave us awhole bill anyway #GAAHHHH #i hate it. #but wer'e low on sales #what can we do? #cant risk losing customers #even the other day ppl kept giving us like 1000 pper bills and we wer running out of change #and som lady got mad bc 'its our job' and why dont we have change #or smn #idk my coworker jus said #but shit bro it tires me out #i might sound selfish but like im also tired dude #i jusgt wanna go home and we'r bout to close but u still try to buy #bro wer'e CLOSED #then they get mad

[dismalzelenka]

.

#today i had a pianist during a rehearsal go “wow your voice you just have so much natural talent i mean some people really work for years—” #and i kinda snapped #and i was polite but also i unloaded the entire story of the last thirteen years in the cosmic joke that is my life #this lady got thirteen years of trauma in a twenty minute speed run #she Learned Things today about existential despair and the societal clusterfuck that is the Trans Experience #and how that intersects in the classical singing world in an incredibly challenging and fucked up way #and how i went from scooting under the door into a voice program with seven lessons under me #and then three years later proceeded to fling myself into a testosterone fueled vocal puberty in the midst of a professional singing degree #and lost the respect and support of most of the vocal and choir faculty because everyone thought i was committing professional suicide #if it werent for my own voice teacher (who at some point became the mother figure I'd never had) keeping me afloat i would not be here #i have c-ptsd from the shit i went through in the choir department #i had to drop out of school for a semester because my body just folded under the stress #i started getting migraines severe enough i was hospitalized twice with stroke-like symptoms #two weeks ago i had a former teacher from the early days deadname me in front of our colleagues #she tried to play it off as no big deal and it just reminded me no matter how successful i become in this field #no matter how much work i put in to overcome my past #its always going to come back and find me through people who refuse to learn respect #and somehow! im still here! im making a living in the field i trained for #how many people in my generation in the arts degree sector can say that?? by some metrics i am thriving but jesus goddamn #i clawed and fought and bit and dragged myself to where i am right now and had to find my voice TWICE and the worst part is #she meant well #the pianist i mean #and i was polite when i told my story but it was so important to me that she understood #no amount of talent would have gotten me here without sleepless nights and long hours and blood and sweat and tears and you know what #maybe i am a better person for it but dont compliment me by implying i have some inherent gift from a god i dont even believe in #dont tell me your god put me in this place to teach other people compassion #i didnt brush the door of death as many times as i did for the sake of someone else's enlightenment #its been a long 13 years. hell its been a long 2023. in the last eleven months ive had a fundamental upheaval #of everything i thought i knew and understood about myself #so yea im standing at the gate to hell looking the devil in the eye. try me bitch. ive endured worse.

[minglana]

the japanese kids (that only speak japanese) (and they dont have a translator or anything for them) are running around the dorms... if i go to the dorm worker shes gonna say 'oh but theyre just kids🥺and theyre so adorable🥺' and wont find a way to tell them to stop running......

#god the afternoon workers are so useless i swear. they are fine as ppl. especially the younger one #the older one (the one im talking abt) is.... not annoying but she gets on my nerves a lot lol she takes everything too calmly #but anyways usually anything is fine w the afternoon workers. loud music? ppl running in the halls? ppl banging on the doors? its all ok!!! #they wouldve had a stroke 6 yrs ago. ive seen videos of guys smashing yogurts on doors and putting water bottles on other guys' doors #so that when they opened the door the water would go into the room #and my first yr they literally put rice dye (like the fake saffron they put in paellas) on the shower heads #so the water would come out yellow (and the cleaning ladies had more work to do). oh and how cani forget my friend SNEAKING HIS BF #in the dorms to sleep w him the entire week (we werent allowed to bring ppl from outside) AND also ppl drinking and going to dinner drunk #(its me im ppl) also the guys would throw firecrackers at ass oclock at night (like 2am) #i just wonder how these two workers would deal w all of that this yr lmao #z xarre

[navramanan]

Today was supposed to be a better day than it was :(

#there was a meeting with the girls at the mosque after a long time of a break #but some 50+ y/o lady happened to be there for the friday prayer & stayed for our meet up & completely sabotaged it #so instead of us 5 girls talking getting to know e/o (there were 2 new ones) or catching up #we all had to sit there & listen to her lecture us and just take control of every conversation & dictate the topics #to the point that when one of the new girls was about to leave i went to the door with her & we ended up talking #just for that lady to be like uhhhh can you two either stop or come inside & talk #like we would have but ur not letting us :(( #i came home so so frustrated and anything else i saw on my phone just pissed me off additionally #nesi rants

[startersword]

I THINK I SUCCESSFULLY CONDITIONED THE JESUS LADY TO PUT UP HER CART OUTSIDE 🙏🏽

#wanwan #For context: I work in a small grocery store in my Small Town and our shopping carts are literally. right next to the doors. #The registers? Are right in front of the doors. It is ~10 steps (I've counted before) to put your cart up outside- #-and in the proper assortment as well. #She always brings her own bags but she either brings too many or not enough (i let her bag her own stuff- #-bc I've bagged for her before and she got rlly nitpicky so i just let her bag. i always try to let customers bag if they bring their own.) #And she always leaves her cart at the front and I have physically had to go put it back RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER. MULTIPLE TIMES. #I even put the basket right in front of her and physically put her stuff in it so she would take the fucking hint #And she STILL took her fucking stuff out and left the cart there #Also she's Christian and every time she comes by she's wearing some kind of christian t-shirt #So that's why I call her the jesus lady

[parameddic]

hi i'm alive and writing and have thoughts in my brain i'm excited to be here!!! thanks for waiting for me tumblrines, tumblrinos and tumblrinas 🌶️🐈

#my boss went out and got a new copy of the key we use to open the door at work which means now !!!! #the lady who i trained this week is going to start on monday #she picked everything up v quickly bc she already knew how to do half of it #she's so good!!!! and the lady who has been ghosting me after she quit #does not Need to drop off the key before i can finally stop Coming In To Work Again #and so. i am excited to have. several days off in a row where i don't have to do anything. #i will do so many chores and catch up on so many things #working full time does Not agree with me and i have been at it for like a month and a half by mistake dskfjlsdkjg #and oh ... oh i am not .. i am Not looking forward to doing placement but that's a not-right-now problem. that's a problem for not right no

[heathermason]

the landlords want 350,000 for this place

#full offense to the landlords but they bought this place for 30k #and there is so much fucked up stuff in the foundation and actual building since we moved here in december 2020 #or whatever. it was 2020 or 2021 #none of the outlets work in my moms room and we have to use extension cords for everything and so forth so sometimes the power goes out and #we have to do the flip the switches thing #and apparently our landmate cried bc this is how she found out but my mom found out first #and they (landlords) just bought another new house #i hope you rot in hell #i moved in with a broken door a broken closet door super bad moisture due to the windows not closing #all the way and shit so my room is moldy on the walls near the windows #which also happened last year during this time of year #the real estate lady is heavily doubting that the landlords will be able to sell it at this price #and this house specifically the one we live in not the one in the street used to be a barn. come on now. theres a super low ceiling with #a whole bedroom of space like that we cant access because the ''door'' is near the top of the house. no latter. foundation is cracking and #UGH I

[deus-ex-mona]

i think that about covers the ✨entire population✨

#this started off as a complaint about inconsiderate commuters and my strange coworkers… and somehow ended with my grandparents lmao #idk why but my coworkers seem to really like physical contact for some reason?? i’m not used to it at all man… #like there could be a ton of space behind me but this coworker would walk directly up behind me and pat my back or something? lady pls #or i could be looking at my results and my other coworker would just randomly hug me and i??? lady pls???? i’m so confused #and the thing is… i really really hate being touched by any other person (except my mother. she’s fine) so i’m just (ʘ‿ʘ) throughout it all #and speaking of physical contact… those commuters. man. ಠ‿ಠ #who brings their prams out at like 7.25am anyway? it’s early as balls and the kid’s still asleep 80% of the time anyway #pls take your kids out on a family trip later in the day… yk… when people aren’t trying to squeeze onto the train to get to work??? #and they almost always choose to stand right smack in the middle of the train… right in front of the door to boot. at least move in???? #and sometimes (the worst times) the kids are obviously old enough to walk around (and are in fact running around the train at that moment)… #…but the parent keeps the pram unfolded in all its oversized glory anyway. like whyyyyyyyyy #so now not only do commuters have to squeeze together because of a lack of space… #…they now have to shuffle around to avoid bumping into the kid. like ughhhhhhhhhhhh i hate trains sm #and also! those people who purposely stand on the side of the escalator that people walk up on and refuse to walk???? hate them too #i’ve missed so many trains because of them ಠ‿ಠ especially if they stop moving right at the end of the escalator (ʘ‿ʘ) #screw trains fr >:( buses are much better!! the air conditioning is better on buses too!!!!!! #life was much better in quarantine ngl. i could shut myself out from the outside world and just ✨thrive✨ in peace… #those overly-specific things in the dni list are all based on my family members and former acquaintances lmao #shoutout to my chopper-wielding border hopping grandpa and self-hammering grandma!!! i barely knew you guys!!!! #wait come to think of it… i have never really had a single conversation with any of my grandparents. whoops. #i don’t even know their names either… double whooooooops #and so that marks the end of my pointless rant for now. i could’ve just summed this up as ‘dni if you’re human’ tbh #i’ve even done like quite a few of these things on my own list do… dni: me??? (ʘ‿ʘ) if only that was possible aha… #…well i didn’t cry while watching dear layla. lol. that’s the one thing i can definitively say i didn’t and will never do— #inedible blubbering #sunday’s 🧂saltfest🧂

[fatcowboys]

baby girl cayenne has been permanently out of the wall for 6 hours and she is Not happy abt it

#poor baby is upset she cant hide in the wall maam i promise these other hiding spots are good too <3 #she keeps trying to get the closet door open and is crying poor poor baby #i have feliwau coming w my chewy order tomorrow in case that helps #poor lil lady ))): #shes just so very anxious