#eyes and mouth then fuck them im getting out and building a sand castle

[hejdetermig]

my parents are begging me to move to florida with them. every person i met in florida just expounds on the greatness of the beach

“have you been to the beach yet?!”

“when are you going to the beach?!!?”

“oh the beach is where it’s at!”

they’re all lying, the beach almost killed me. i wish it had rather than burn 10 million holes through my dermis straight to my heart. and the ocean almost took me cause my goggles weren’t effectively sealed and saltwater crept in to my eyes and a lot went in my mouth. plus i couldn’t stop imagining sharks lurking around me bc the water was fucking green and not blue like the pictures.

so anyway,

apart from the beach, what is there? it’s redneck nation, white trash lollapalooza. basically oklahoma except without the native americans, cows, and casinos. it’s humid as all get out. no one, i mean absolutely no one could wrap their head around me disliking the weather. it was so bizarre. i thought o was losing my mind after the 14th floridian i met who asked why i don’t move down there just looked at me in total confusion when i said i didn’t like all the humidity. MY OWN DAD didn’t believe me, like sir you were born and raised in indiana and then spent the last 20 years in oklahoma please don’t act like it’s normal to be violently perspirating after standing outside for 2 minutes. i legit think the sun is affecting their brains. i couldn’t catch my breath when i got off the plane i’m not joking. it’s a hell site, fucking dagobah if it downpoured every 3 hours and if yoda had a meth addiction and was also a nazi

#had to vent #this is pensacola btw #met a cool navy commander pilot tho #the sun is trying to kill me and he’s poisoned all the floridians #after their third sunburn they’re suddenly his vessels for evil #tricking more and more normal americans into moving there #enticing them with the beach and slowly building his army #too bad i’m immune to such trickery and i saw right through that fucker’s traps he cannot have me #i used to be on the swim team but i will not keep trying to swim where i’m clearly not welcome and if the ocean won’t stop getting in my #eyes and mouth then fuck them im getting out and building a sand castle #which the ocean kept trying to destroy btw #petty asshole

[merotwst]

Can I request scarf with "Here, have my scarf instead" with Kalim x reader? For the christmas event <3

'TIS THE DAMN SEASON !

‹ merotwst's christmas and 250 followers event ›

[ ⇝scarf ; “here, have my scarf instead.” ft. kalim al-asim ]

{ n: not proofread, wonky. im having a lil writer's block so apologies if it's short but i hope u like it, anon! ty for requesting!!!! }

the snowfall was heavy and it seemed like a snowstorm was approaching. you didn't like snowstorms. you were sure your boots were going to be buried under a thick layer of white by the end of the class eliciting a heavy sigh from you. if only ramshackle was in one of the mirror dorms, you wouldn't need to worry too much about the cold and getting snowed on. grim hated the wet cold as much as you did and it sucks that you have to walk all the way back with him grumbling about every single irritation you so desperately wanted to voice out but didn't in hopes that your situation wouldn't sound sadder than it already was.

it was just one foot after another, grim tucked cozily between your arms as you walked. you were right about calves deep in the snow and as the flecks of white continue to fall on you, a tiny fraction of them found their way tangled on your hair. grim kept whining.

“hurry up! can't you walk a little faster? i'm freezing here.” he said and you roll your eyes with irritation, resisting the urge to hurl him across the street to that tree with icicles sharp enough to pierce through monster cat fur.

“you think i'm not?” you retort, “plus, i'm the one doing all the walking here. it's not exactly easy to navigate through this thick snow, i'm not the flash.”

a small, cool breeze passes by and you shivered. that's when you realize your neck was cold.

“fuck,” you cursed under your breath a gloved hand instinctively finding its way to your neck, “left my scarf in the classroom.” you turn to look back at the school building standing over at the distance almost looking like a castle. you were already so far from it that it would be a pain to walk all the way back. you groaned. just your luck. could this day get any worse? well, at least the day was ending.

as you stood, looking over at the nrc school building, you heard the crunching of boots against the thick snow coming up from behind you. you turn to be greeted by the loveliest ball of sunshine amidst the gloomy weather. his smile almost seemed to melt the surrounding snow as he approached you. a definite contrast to you and your slightly grouchy mood.

“prefect!” he called out, jogging up to you. he donned a thick layer of winter clothes. he always did say he got cold easily during the winter season. but that was to be expected since they didn't exactly have cold seasons at the scalding sands.

“hey, kalim.” you greet him with a soft smile of your own. he looked like a happy maroon marshmallow in his winter clothes. his scarf reached just above his lips but you can still see his smile through it all.

adjusting himself in his position, grim spoke up, “where are you headed to?” he then proceeded to point at the paper bags on his arms seeming to be filled with cans and other groceries you can only assume will be used for another scarabia feast of sorts. “and what's with all that?”

kalim looked over to where your monster companion's outstretched paw was pointed at and he beamed, “we're going to have a dinner party! i volunteered to go buy some extra ingredients from the store and i'm on my way back.” the housewarden beamed, “you guys should come!”

“say no m—mmph!”

“thank you for the offer, kalim,” you spoke with a gentle voice and a not-so-gentle hand over grim's fuzzy mouth, “but we'd rather not impose. besides i'm making dinner tonight. it might not be as fancy as a scarabian feast, but it'll be enough to get us full.”

at this point, grim had managed to pry your hands off his mouth and he let out an angry noise, “it's a feast! what are you talking about?! there's more food there!”

“shut up, grim or i'll hurl your greedy ass over to those icicles.”

“can i come?”

your bickering temporarily came to a halt as you and grim both simultaneously whipped your heads to look at the boy who, at this point, had a thin layer of snow on his head and shoulders. kalim realized that you didn't seem to understand what he meant so he backtracked, “i mean, can i come to have dinner with you guys? the snowfall is getting kind of thick and it looks like it's about to storm and i'm sure jamil wouldn't want me walking around in one and...”

a pause, his cheeks getting redder and not just from the cold.

“well, i want to have a christmas dinner with the prefect. hehe,” he smiled shyly but then immediately his eyes shot open again, “ah! but only if you want to, of course! i wouldn't want to intrude. i just want to try your cooking! i promise i'll help out! you see with christmas break nearing, everyone's going home and i j—”

“of course, kalim. you're welcome to have dinner with us. what about scarabia's party, though?”

“i'll just call jamil to have it without me! i wanna spend this night with you.”

you silently pray for jamil's sanity.

“if you say so. and you're right,” you look up at the sky, that was darkening by the minute, “a storm seems to be coming. we'd better take shelter so let's head back to my dorm.” you said as you started to walk. kalim's smile was bright, “thank you! i promise i'll help out with the cooking. jamil never lets me help him out.”

“i wonder why.”

“ahaha! he's just worried i might accidentally cut myself or something. he's always such a worrywart,” he looked over at you, “but i promise i'll be really careful with you.” he said with a small wink which made you blush a little. lilia or cater probably taught him that and you let out a small laugh in response, “oh kalim, what are you trying to do.”

“i'm trying to impress you! i won't be seeing you in a while when the holiday break starts.” he explains and you roll your eyes playfully. kalim had been getting bolder and bolder with his moves lately and it was honestly quite cute. it felt nice to always be in the center of his attention whenever you were together.

“oh!” he exclaimed suddenly and you turned. you were caught by surprise when he wrapped a maroon scarf around your neck—the one wrapped around his own just a few seconds ago, “i've been noticing you occasionally trying to warm your neck so here, have my scarf, instead.” he grinned with a happy glint in his crimson eyes, “ah, but now i'm cold! let's head back to your dorm now!” he said and started trekking to the direction of your dorm.

you stood there, a little ways behind him not realizing the giddy smile you had on your face. his scarf smelled like him and it definitely warmed you up, much like his sunshine of a personality. him wanting to make and eat dinner with you sent butterflies fluttering around your stomach. maybe snowstorms weren't so bad after all.

“i can't believe he wants to have dinner with just you and not me OR that you passed up an opportunity for a feast.”

“shut up, grim.”

#. merowrites #tis the damn season merotwst #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland #kalim al asim x reader #kalim al asim #kalim x reader #kalim twst

[teenyweenynightghost]

Beach Day

Basically just what I think Måneskin would be like on a beach day🤗

Damiano

Ps: i dont know what the fuck you call those beds you sit on at the beach so i will call them sun beds.

He would most definitely wake you up early, going to a popular beach

He would be the type of person who would leave quite unprepared. Maybe a sunscreen bottle in his hands- if he remembers, that is

You would clearly have to be in charge of the beach bag

“Did you take sunscreen?” “Oh right lemme grab it.” “How about towels?! You shouted from downstairs. “ON IT!!”

Once you get there, brace yourself because I am 100% sure he would throw you in the water

Also because it’s literally still dark out- it’s coLD

“DAMIANOOO!” You shrieked, freezing water all around you. Hearing him giggle only fueled your anger as you tried swimming towards him, but he had already caught onto your antics and was now safely located on the beach bed.

Another thing: I’m pretty sure he would try and stay there all day

“Dami, it’s 3 pm, the sun is dangerous, let’s go home.” You pleaded for the hundred time, watching him build sand castles under the umbrella. “Are we pussies? No the fuck we’re not. We’re staying here until it chickens out.” “What it?” “The SUN!“You rolled your eyes and muttered a few prayers before laying back down on the sun bed.”

And when you’re in the water… beware

“Absolutely not.” You pushed Damiano’s hand away from your thighs, as you tried putting some distance between yourself and the seemingly horny singer. He only pouted and swam back near you, holding you in his arms. “What’s wrong, cara mia, afraid you won’t be able to be quiet? He hummed in your ear while caressing your ass. “Get off you horny bastard.”

In the evening, when you would finally manage to talk him into going home, you would have to but a million bottles of aloe vera to cure his burns.

Thomas

Oh If you could get him out of bed and on the beach at midnight you could consider it a success

Unless there is you (you know exACtly what I mean by that), food or games, he will simply not wake up

“Thomas, sweetheart, wake up” you whispered in his ear, caressing his cheek. “Be gone thot.” “Thomas.” “I was pretty clear before.” You grunted and started shaking him roughly, noticing his eyes were now open and a furious expression on his face. “You cruel, vicious woman.” “Ah, so you’re up.”

He would definitely ask you to take him to a more quiet beach, where he could slumber in peace

After getting in the water for approximately five minutes, he would return to the towels and sleep

An hour later, when he would get hot again, he would go for another dip.

“Stay longer, pleeasee!” You pleaded, holding his hands and looking up at him with puppy-eyes. “To quote Kevin Hart; nah man, I ain’t gon do it.” “PLEASEEEE!”He sighed and beat himself up for being so soft, before pulling you to him and jumping in your arms.

Beach days with Thomas would be incredibly relaxing

There would not be a single thing in the world you had to worry about, considering that he wouldn’t move at all

If he took his guitar with him, he would serenade you in between naps

You would both sit in a comfortable silence, your eyes on his fingers as he’d strum the chords delicately

Oh and food

Yes…

“Y/N! “Yes.” “Food. Now. A lot. Much. Bunch. Urgently.” Y/n scoffed, grabbing a bag of chips and throwing it in Thomas’ face.

Ethan

Now because my personality is very similar to Ethan’s

Im probably just projecting

But anyways

Early morning coffee, maybe a jog, this man is definitely up at a VERY early hour

A few cuddles and kisses, and you both end up in the kitchen, having breakfast and searching for a beach

It would obviously be a secluded one, where he could bring his thousands of chairs and tents.

“Ethan, why is there a 400€ bill on your card?” “I bought a few beach things.” Y/n stared at him, mouth agape, trying to figure out what the hell he bought. “WHAT?” “Well, there were these incredibly light foldable chairs and beds. They are top technology, made with…” He kept on rambling, his eyes lighting up at the subject.

He would obviously drive you there, putting some chill tunes on, holding your hand and kissing it at every stop.

Once you get there NDNSSNSN MY HEART

He would be THE softest, most puppy-eyed human being EVER

Ethan applied sunscreen all over y/n’s body, making sure she was protected., leaving a soft kiss on every inch of her body. Slowly picking her up bridal-style, he walked into the sea and submerged them both underwater. “Ethan! It’s cold!” Y/n shrieked, earning a chuckle from the drummer. “Spiacente, amore.” The rest of their day was spent cuddling, exploring the water and napping. It’s safe to say this was the most relaxed y/n has ever been.

Just… A SOFTIE

Vic

So you know how everyone before was kinda wholesome?

(This works cuz I have iwbys playing in the background)

She is very much not.

If she went out with friends, she would probably go to a more busy beach, but with you, she will take you to one that has just enough people that it isn’t empty, but also enough to be considered being out in public

And then the teasing would begin

“Hey, can you help me apply sunscreen?” “Anything for you, little puppy.” She answered you cheekily, a devilish expression on her face. “NOT THERE!”

So after the whole sunscreen ordeal would be over…

Time for the water

😈

“It’s really cold! “Well lemme warm you up puppy.” Y/n tried to protest, but she felt Vic’s warm hands on her body and all words died in her throat. Vic palmed her chest lightly, pressing softly as soon as she heard y/n gasp. “We’re in public!” “Then be a good girl and stay quiet for me, hmm?” Ugh this girl really made you a sinner. You nodded and got closer to her, feeling one of her hands moving to your thighs, squeezing the inner parts and letting a finger float upwards. You whimpered at the feeling earning a grunt from her. “We’re gonna have to train you to be more quiet when we get back home, won’t we puppy?”

And with that, your beach mood is gone.

Time to fu-

That’s it babes❤️ pretty chaotic but at this point it fits my aesthetic so I won’t bother.

Taglist: @fuckim-so-gay @ginny-lily @messyhairday-me @cheese-toastie-11 @wannabemarlenabutiscoraline @simp-per-ethan @maneskinrollercoaster @juststalking @superchrystaldrug

#maneskin #victoria de angelis #ethan torchio #damiano david #thomas raggi #måneskin

[descendantofthesparrow]

Interlude - Rewrite POYW - Part 5 - Future vision and new VKs

=

-two days later(August 2016)-

Uma perked up from the small sea glass bead bracelet she was working on, a smirk growing on her face as you appeared from the brush of the forest and walked toward her, a black bag in your right hand full of food. “Took you long enough, I even started working on this!” Uma held up the unfinished bracelet and set it to her side, making grabby hands at your bag as you stepped closer to her “Gimmie, I know you brought pineapple wedges.”

You laughed a bit and held out the bag to her, taking the bag off your back and taking out a towel and laying it down on the sand before sitting next to Uma “I brought your pineapple wedges” which Uma was already getting into “Some mac and cheese that Gil made, chicken breast, cornbread, and some packs of apple juice. bone app a teeth” Uma gave you a look at your last couple of words but shook her head at your grin.

“Weirdo” she mumbled, pulling out the containers filled with chicken and a fork, popping open the lip, and chowing down “Damn, who made the chicken?”

“Someone in the kitchen” you chuckled, picking up the box of cornbread and grabbing one to eat “Harry, Gil, and I didn’t feel like eating in the cafeteria last night so we took some of the food from the kitchen that the students have access to that was in the ‘take whatever you want’ fridge that the chefs load up with so much shit, and Gil made the mac and cheese like a day ago, everything is pretty fresh” Uma shoveled some of the mac and cheese into her mouth and groaned, her eyes fluttering.

“Fuck that’s good, even on the isle Gil was a good chef, he needs to cook more” you laughed at that, grabbing a box of apple juice and stabbing it into the top.

“He does, he makes bomb cookies too.” Uma perked up at that, giving you a look that said ‘bring me the cookies or I drown you’ “Hey! Don’t give me that look! Next time he makes cookies I’ll bring ‘em, okay??” Uma continued to stare at you with that look before nodding, satisfied with your answer.

“So?” Uma swallowed her food and dug out an apple juice box from your back, pointing at you with it in her hand “Updates, what happened with the new vks? I saw the limo go in and out two days ago.”

“Complete success, we got Harriet, CJ, Sammy Smee, Skipper and Sterling, and Dizzy all off the isle, and they’re all at the dorms now, Harriet’s gonna be transferred to the college next quarter and school starts next-next week” Uma nodded at your explanation, twirling the fork in her hands. “Your hair looks really good by the way” Uma looked at you, a soft smile on her face.

She had undone her braids about a week ago, to let the ocean water properly flow through the strands, and now rested against her back and shoulders in thick curls. “Thank you” she hummed, picking at her cornbread “I've been trying to get the…shrimp smell out”

You furrowed your brows and reached up, stopping yourself a few inches from her hair “May I touch your hair?” Uma glanced at you, slightly surprised you had asked, and nodded. Tilting her head a bit as you gently tugged on a lock of her hair. “it’s really soft, and personally I don’t smell anything bad, especially not shrimp, more…the ocean and coconut” Uma laughed a bit as you released her hair and set your hand back on your knee.

“I've been using coconut to take care of my hair…good to know it's working” you smiled to yourself as a soft grin grew on Uma’s face, one of her hands reaching up and curling a lock around her finger.

“Yeah… Evie's business is picking up” Uma raised her brow, as if saying ‘nice subject change, and I care why?’ “Well” you laughed, pushing Uma’s shoulder a bit as she rolled her eyes “hold up a moment im getting to the good part, but her business is picking up and Harry works for her as a model” Uma’s brows raised at that, “Told you, anyway he works for her as a model and with her business picking up, he models for her more often and she's paying him for it, soooo Harry’s getting fucking moneys~”

Uma hummed and picked at her chicken slice “Really? How much?” you grinned, making Uma sit up and grab at your shoulders “Okay how fucking much is Harry making from modeling; because that grin tells me he’s already rich.”

“He very well might be in a year or two” you laughed, gently removing her hands from your shoulders and readjusting your sitting position. “somewhere between 30 and a thousand per paycheck” Uma gave you a blank stare for a few moments before she rolled her eyes.

“Okay don’t tell me then, sheesh” you fell back as you laughed, Uma twisting around and sitting cross-legged, picking up another apple juice box and sipping at it.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry, um, Harry and Evie said it should increase as her business grows n stuff, but right now he’s making about eight hundred a paycheck.” Uma turned to you with wide eyes, mouth dropping open slightly in shock.

“whaaat?!” she screeched, dropping the now empty apple juice box into the sand “Eight-hundred?! That’s more-that’s more than I've made in a month at my ma’s shop!!” you laughed a bit, nodding your head as Uma continued to stare at you bewildered.

“Yeah, he’s already put a lot of it into a savings account, something about getting an apartment for us in the future with room for the Smee boys and his sisters if they ever needed a place to stay, but that won't be for another year or two since you have to be 18 to rent an apartment without parental permission.” Uma smiled a bit, Harry was one to think of the future, even on the isle. He would stash away rubies and gold coins in a savings stash under a floorboard in his old apartment for when they got off the isle.

“That sounds nice, make sure he gets one with a pool for me yeah?” you laughed again, shaking your head a bit as you and Uma side fist-bumped.

“I’ll make sure of that yeah” you took out your phone and sighed, standing from the beach and wiping the sand from your pants “I got to go, Ben wanted me for a meeting at 1, I'll get the bag when I come back tomorrow, see you!” Uma accepted the crouch side hug from you and waved you off, casting a spell to keep water off and out of the containers of food and the bag as she packed it up and dove into the sea, swimming back out to her mother's old hideout.

She slowed to a stop in front of the main opening, stepping through the air bubble she had made a while back and snapping her fingers, the water disappearing off her body by magic. “There we go” she mumbled, swinging the backpack off her shoulder and walking over to the “kitchen” area of the old hideout. She stashed away the food into the “fridge” aka old spell and potion cabinet that she had cast a cold holding spell onto to turn it into a makeshift fridge.

With a wave of her hand, her clothes transformed from a tank top and calf cut cargo pants to a long-sleeved red shirt with a hook stitched to the chest and black leggings. She stretched her arms behind her back and groaned as her back pop slightly.

Uma sighed and looked around the hideout, eyes landing on the claw-shaped cauldron in the middle of the room. it was odd, being in her mother's famous lair, but…also comforting, in a strange way.

She couldn't explain it, but…she felt safe. Probably because the only people that came around here were teens or kids on a dare and were easily scared off. So Uma was pretty much alone in the deep of the ocean.

Uma walked over to the little corner she had turned into her bedroom and sat on her bed, picking up the orange blanket you had given her cotillion night and curling it around her, staring off into space as she thought about…well everything.

From the new vks, the transfer plan, her boys, you, the isle, the vks still on the isle…the future was so unknown, what she would give for just a glimpse, just so she wasn’t so scared for it.

wait

Uma’s eyes widened, drifting between the clawed cauldron and a small set of books that were hidden behind her mother's vanity.

She could see into the future!

Uma lept off her bed and towards the books, pulling them out until she found one with the symbol of twisting water and tentacles appeared in her hands “there you are” she whispered, she had gone through these books when she found the lair and in them, she found hundreds of spells and potion instructions ranging from simple hair or visualization spells to transfiguration and curses.

“Future vision, future vision, future-ah!” Uma landed on the page she needed and stood, walking over to the cauldron and conjuring a stand for her to set the book on. She set it down and read the instructions, it seemed she would need to both make a potion and use an incantation.

“Okay, I got this” she let out a breath, rubbing her hands together as she spun around and walked over to her mother's old ingredient cabinet.

The tail of a sea worm, the clenched fist of a long-dead merman, the head of a fish, wings of a dust fairy pixie, and the eye of a seer. She carried the items over to the cauldron, casting a levitating spell to keep them next to her as she reviewed the spell.

“Okay, okay I got this” she took another breath, opening the caldron and tossing the ingredients in, leaning back a bit as smoke and vapor released from the cauldron. “Oof, okay”

Uma took one last look at the book, muttering the incantation to herself as she held the eye of a seer above the cauldron.

Finally, as she dropped the eye into the brew, and she clutched her necklace as the incantation echoed around her.

“Though winters past and summers morn, the future will be shown/the sight clear and sounds echo, I see into a world unknown”

Uma leaned back a bit as golden shimmering dust rose from the cauldron, slowly forming into a shape…of the isle. “The isle?” Uma mumbled, leaning closer to the image, squinting as she watched the golden magic bridge build and a limo enter the isle, the main bridge part looked very different than the rundown broken castle-like area she was used to, it looked to be rebuilt with signs on the front. “They’re getting more kids, when is this?”

The isle disappeared and was replaced with the image of a golden calendar, showing the present date then suddenly the pages were torn off at a rapid pace, Uma desperately trying to keep up with the passing dates before it stopped.

Uma blinked and looked closer, her brows furrowing as she looked at the circled date. “August 2nd…2019?!” Uma took a step back, her hands clenching at her side, three years? The vision she had seen before was in almost three years? But…it could possibly be one of many pick-ups? “How many vks have been picked up between the six from two days ago and the vks from the vision just before” Uma hoped the spell worked like this, she was in for shit if it didn’t.

Thankfully, that’s how the spell seemed to work, the image of the calendar disappeared and the sand like magic stayed dormant, shifting within the caldron…it seemed the spell didn’t know how to answer that question “Maybe I need to make it clearer?” Uma hummed, tapping her fingers against the rim of the cauldron before it came it her “How long will it be between the six vks two days ago and the next transfer of vks.”

The calendar appeared again, now first showing the date of two days ago, and then ripping off the pages rapidly “Oh no.” Uma muttered, sinking down to her knees slightly as the calendar stopped at August 2nd 2019 again. “two and a half years? Seriously?! What the fuck?!” Uma growled and knocked over the stand that held the spellbook and whirled back around at the cauldron “Why does it take so long!?”

The calendar disappeared again and was replaced with a long table with about twelve people sitting around it, and she could recognize King Ben sitting at the end, his head held in his hands as the others all held a hand up, glowering at the young king. “His council?” Uma murmured, looking at the faces of the people to see if she recognized anybody, only able to pick out Aurora mother, who had her hand up, and ex-king Luis, Cinderella’s father-in-law, who had his hand down, seeming to be on Ben’s side of whatever they were debating.

“What did they vote for?” Uma asked, biting her lip as the council disappeared and a paper took its place, the top reading ‘Application for juvenile Reunification’. Uma furrowed her brows, confused for a moment before she kept reading, rage bubbling in her gut as she did. “They have to fucking apply??! Just to get the freedom they deserve?! Do they agree to this?!”

The application disappeared and was replaced with the moving image of Ben and (y/n), Harry glaring at the king just behind (y/n). (y/n) was yelling, so was Ben, both motioning to the paper in (y/n)s hand. “That must be the application thing or whatever” Uma muttered, smirking as (y/n) crumbling it in her fist and shook it in Ben’s face.

Ben seemed to nod and point at it, and Uma leaned in reading his lips ‘that’s what I want to do (y/n), but I can’t! When they overrule me, I can't do anything about it! I’m sorry, but if we don’t go by their rules then we don’t get kids off the isle im sorry!’

(y/n) shook her fist in his face again and turned, walking towards Harry and burying her face in his chest, he wrapped his arms around her and glared at Ben, Uma leaning in again to read their lips. Ben spoke first ‘I am sorry, I’ll try to get everything ready as soon as possible, but some of it is going to take almost two years, maybe almost three! Especially the shelter and cps agency, and the council required those to be done before we can even send out the applications’ Harry stared at Ben for a moment before looking down at (y/n) and pulling her tighter into him.

‘Get it done beasty boy’ Harry seemed to growl, his lip set in a slight snarl ‘and quick, if this takes longer than yeh say, you’ll be hanging from the mast’ Ben nodded, turning back to his desk and picking up a thick folder.

‘I'll hold you to that’ Ben said back, about to say something else but the image disappeared before Uma’s eyes before he could finish.

“Dammit,” Uma muttered, rubbing her with her palms as she grit her teeth. It was the same reason they had taken so long after Ben had promised to get her off the isle after the coronation, the council kept pushing back everything, so stuck in their old ways of thought that they just couldn’t bear to have more vks in Auradon.

“Bastards” Uma growled, standing from the floor and looking back in the cauldron, it seemed the spell had finished, and she wouldn’t be able to ask any more questions about the future. “Ben, (y/n), I hope to Hades you don’t fuck this up for those kids”

-

Celia couldn’t help but keep her eyes locked on the spot where the Auradon limo had been parked only two days ago, the spot where Dizzy had left her on the isle.

Dizzy had promised to get her off next, whispering it in Celia’s ear as Dizzy hugged her tightly just before she left. Dizzy was hardly one to break a promise, even in a place where promises were never kept, so Celia trusted her.

She just hoped that trust wouldn’t be proved wrong.

Celia sighed, looked at her watch, and realized she had to go pick up some stuff for Hades before her usual fortune-telling shift in front of the arcade.

She quickly traveled to the market and snatched up some cans of corn, cans of refried beans, and a large loaf of bread, that was only a day past its baking date. Celia took another loaf for herself and her dad, suppressing the smile she had as she walked towards the mines.

it was nice having actual food to eat, Celia no longer went hungry every other night and no longer needed to scrounge for money to get the food that was being kept on the market thanks to Harriet's crew that was making sure the merchants weren’t keeping the food away from everybody due to selling it at a high price as they usually did for the better food as they did before the program.

“Celia~” A velvety voice cooed behind her, and Celia turned, raising her brow as she spotted Ginny Gothel, Mother Gothel’s daughter. Ginny Gothel was a flirt, a heavy-set young woman who dared to blow a kiss to Harriet and survive. her dark curly hair was in a short bob that showed the shaved part of her neck. her face, which was always either set in a glare or a flirtatious smirk, was painted with dark makeup. she collected crystals and rings to adorn herself, black and dark red fabrics flowed around her body when she strut down the market place with pride. she was a part of the older villain kids, so respect came with her presence.

“Celia darling~” Ginny cooed; Celia just slowly nodded to show she was listening “do you think you can ask Dizzy if she's got an opening? I need a touch up” Ginny's hand reached up and brushed against the back of her neck where her hair was beginning to overgrow where it was supposed to be. Celia huffed, fixing her grip on her supplies for hades.

“First, I ain't in charge of her and you can go find out yourself I ain't your errand rant, second, Dizzy left two days ago” Ginny's eyes went wide at that “She's in Auradon now, with all those prissy people, so tough luck, eh?” Ginny groaned and leaned heavily back against the wall she was next to, throwing her arm over her eyes.

“Noooo how am I ever going to get my hair cut now?! Dizzy was the only one to understand exactly what I needed!...” her arm dropped to her side as she pouted, looking back at Celia who just stared at her with bored eyes “Well I could go to the hearts salon but I do not trust that mad queen with those sheers”

“Suck it up and get it cut you weenie” Celia snarked, smirking as Ginny scoffed at her and walked off, presumably to the queen of hearts salon.

Celia shrugged Ginny's dramatic attitude off and made her way to the mines.

-

Ginny sighed dramatically, rubbing her hands against the back of her neck again, she really did need a touch-up. But Dizzy was in Auradon and she was the only hair person Ginny trusted with her hair. The last time she went to the hearts salon she ended up with the wrong cut and length.

But then again. Ginny stopped in the middle of the street, hands on her hips as she pouted at the floor, she really-really needed a touch-up on her undercut.

Fuck it, if it got fucked up, she’d fix it herself.

She twisted on her heel and walked over to the side of the isle that housed the red-hearts salon. She pushed the main door open and crossed her arms, her dark amber eyes scanning the customers and workers.

“Ey darling, you here for a cut or a dye?” Ginny turned, smirking as she locked eyes with one of her closest cohorts on the isle, Colin Hearts. The only other person she trusted with her hair, she had hoped they were working today, and lucky for her they were.

Colin was a lanky teen, their heels making them seem taller than they really were. they always seemed to wear flowing shirts and tight pants, and wore five-inch heels more often than not. Their natural dark red hair had been cut into a fluffy bright red Mohawk and their brown eyes were hidden behind purple contact lenses. Their teasing lips were always painted with black lipstick, and their nails sharp and red.

Ginny walked to her “friend” and they shared a quick handshake they had made when both of them were young. “Yeah, due for a buzz on my undercut, think you can do that for me, hun?” Colin looked up at the ceiling, their painted lips in a false thinking pout “Colin.” Colin smirked at Ginny's low tone and nodded.

“Yeah, I can do that for you, come on~ you know my station~” Ginny gave tight-lipped smile to Colin and strut over to the scarlet red chair with painted white hearts that Colin had decked out a while ago to claim it as their station.

Ginny sat down and crossed her legs, examining her black nails as Colin settled behind her. “So just a touch up, eh?” Colin murmured aloud, Ginny nodded in confirmation, leaning her head back to peer at Colin.

“Don’t fuck it up or I take those red lace pumps you treasure so much” Ginny grinned as Colin gasped at that and pushed their hand to their chest at her threat.

“How dare you~!” the two shared a nasty grin and Colin reached for their electric clippers, throwing the hair catcher towel around Ginny's neck and turning the clippers on. “So did you hear that Harriet ‘n her sister left to Auradon two days ago?” Ginny gasped at that “Really?” Colin leaned into Ginny's line of sight “You’re obsessed with that girl; I’m surprised you didn’t sense the moment she left the barrier” Colin chuckled at Ginny's glare and went back to her hair.

“Dizzy’s left too” Ginny sighed, twitching as Colin let out a small laugh.

“I know, if she wasn’t you wouldn’t be here” Colin lifted up the back of Ginny's hair and started to buzz her undercut, going quiet as they focused on not cutting more than Ginny wanted.

“Smee’s boys left too, all three of ‘em” Colin muttered, shaving the design into Ginny’s undercut “Six more vks off the isle, wonder if any more will follow” Ginny hummed at that, watching Colin in the mirror as they worked at her hair. That was a question, would there be more vks to follow the six that left two days ago?… Ginny hoped so, she would love to get off the isle and away from her mother.

“Think they’ll pick any of us if it continues?” Ginny asked, leaning on her hand as Colin tilted her head. Colin shrugged after a moment.

“Dunno, maybe not us, but-” they nodded their head to the right, Ginny's eyes following to see Diego De’vil sitting in the salon chair reading a book as one of Colin’s coworkers finished on cutting his hair “-Diego maybe, considering he and Carlos are cousins there might be more of a reason” Diego looked over at them, raising his brow “Ey im not talking negative, just possibilities” he sighed and went back to his book, rolling his shoulders a bit.

Diego was a strapping young man, the older cousin of Carlos and the lead singer and guitarist of the Bad Apples. when he was younger, he would sneer at those who would either compare his looks to his much smaller at the time cousin or accidentally call him Carlos. nowadays he took a bit more pride in being Carlos’ cousin. his hair was cut into a short-brushed back Mohawk that transitioned from black at the roots to white at the edges, similar to Carlos’ hair. he wore red and black most of the time, decorated with spikes and pins with hard combat boots and patched-up jeans. his fingers were calloused from years of guitar picking and freckles decorated his face and shoulders.

Colin's coworker finished up refining his mohawk and took the towel from his shoulders, Diego stood and placed a handful of silver coins into the worker's hands. They nodded and walked to the register as Diego examined himself in the mirror “so De’vil?” He turned to look at Colin, who was brushing off the buzzed hair from Ginny's shoulders “Do ya think your cousin will get you off of here or nah?” Diego stared at them for a moment then shrugged.

“Dunno” he grumbled, grabbing his jacket from the counter and slipping it on “Not up to me, but I’ll do anything to get away from my maniac of an aunt, she keeps mistaking me for Carlos” Ginny and Colin winced at that, remembering the old days when the once runt-like Carlos would run out from Hell Hall with a screaming Cruella behind him, a burning cigarette in her hand.

Pity wasn’t a thing on the isle but many of the younger isle residents would take it upon themselves to keep Carlos away from his deranged mother when possible, even Mal had done it when she was younger and much more…nasty, it was like seeing a puppy being kicked while it was already down, you couldn’t help but just care for it.

Then once Mal created her little group the incidents where Carlos ran away from his brother bruised and bloody lessened, until they completely stopped because he was in Auradon.

Now Cruella, ever the insane woman, attempted to chase after Diego, but Diego was stronger and taller than Carlos ever was against Cruella, and easily battered her away when he needed to.

Cruella didn’t bother him much after the first fist to her face.

Diego waved Colin and Ginny goodbye and walked out of the salon, making his way towards the rundown movie theater for band practice. He turned down an ally for a shortcut and appeared on the other side in the market, making his way down the market to get to the other side of the main street, where the theater was.

As he walked someone caught his eye, and he looked to his right, seeing Claudine Frollo picking through a basket of apples for whatever reason, probably her father making her do the grocery shopping.

Claudine was the bell ringer for dragon hall, she was quiet and soft-spoken, hardly talking to anyone her father didn't approve of. she wore clothes that covered her almost completely, as her father said it ‘keeps the sinful eyes of others away’. her sunflower curly blonde hair was always wrapped in a tight bun, it always got caught in her cross-necklace chain if it was let free. many assumed Claudine was a weak girl, her small frame and wide doe-like green eyes didn't help with the assumption, only to be in for a surprise when it was learned she could knock someone out with one clean punch, bell-ringing every day wasn't an easy task after all. she had many pursuers, many of which didn't go any farther after they were reminded of who her father was.

Diego stepped next to her and grabbed an apple, remembering he was wanting a snack before he had gone in for a haircut. She jumped slightly, turning to him with scared eyes before she realized it was him.

“Oh, hi Diego” Claudine mumbled, going back to grabbing some apples and stuffing them in her black and violet messenger bag.

“Hey” he mumbled back, picking up a sturdy-looking apple and biting into it, suppressing a smile at the crisp texture and sweet taste, fresh apples were so much better than he’d ever thought it be.

Claudine finished filling her bag and nodded at Diego, bidding him ‘adieu’ and turning to go the opposite way Diego had been going. Diego watched her for a moment before turning on his heel and resuming his walk towards the theater.

He arrived soon after and pushed open the doors, walking down towards the left hall past the broken-down arcade and stepping into the 2nd theater on the right.

“Eyyyyy look whose finally ‘ere~” his drummer, Ezekiel, called out to him, as he was sitting down on the stage in front of the screen. Diego nodded to him and climbed up the steps up to the stage, nodding at his bass player and secondary guitarist as they messed with their instruments “What took ya so long?”

“Haircut and snack” Diego shrugged, tossing the apple core to Ezekiel, who gagged and tossed the core into the trash a few feet away “let's get to it”

“Yeah~” Eva, his secondary guitarist and support singer, finished with her guitar and set up the mics and speakers. “Let's do dis~”

Kuvira, his bass player, nodded swinging their bass onto their back, and helped Eva set up the last of their gear.

Ezekiel plopped into his chair and spun his drumsticks between his fingers, grinning at Diego as he took out his guitar and threw the strap around his neck “So what shall we start with~”

“…” Diego looked off to the side for a moment, going through the mental list of their songs. “Different Evil Incoming, let's do that, it’s a wicked warm-up song” his band members nodded, setting up their instruments, following Diego’s lead as he started to shred on his guitar.

-

Claudine let out a sigh of relief as she stepped into her ‘home’, her father must have still been at his church service. She glanced at the calendar on the wall and closed her eyes, he had marked it as an all-day service which meant she was alone in the house until midnight.

Thank the gods.

She walked up the stairs to her room and unpacked her food into the fridge in her room, going back downstairs to pack away her father's food in the cabinets. Her father shunned modern technology, calling it the devil's work.

But Claudine would rather have her food last just a bit longer than they did in the cabinets.

Claudine took off her jacket and stretched her arms, groaning a bit as her back popped, she scanned the living room/kitchen once to look for anything out of place, and when she found nothing, she grabbed her jacket and ran back up to her room.

She closed the door behind her and took off her thick sweater, grabbing a thinner long-sleeved shirt and pulling it on, sighing in relief to be free of the slightly constricting fabric.

She glanced at her clock and smiled, it was hardly even one-thirty, she had plenty of alone time before her ‘father’ was home. As she grabbed her favorite book and walked to her closet, which was the only way to access the attic of the apartment, her mind flashed back to when she was much younger.

She was barely 4 years old when her mother died, leaving her scared and alone in their home. She didn’t know how much time had passed after that but she knew she was very hungry and very tired, that’s when Claude Frollo stepped into her mother's home and found her.

He had been looking for her mother after her mother had missed several church services, and with how devoted her mother was to the church it had ticked off the ‘that’s odd’ box for Frollo.

He found her, and in thanks to her mother for being so devoted to the church, adopted her, claiming her as his own and raising her under the name of ‘god’.

It had been 13 years since then, and Claudine had all but forgotten the face of her mother. She brushed away the memory of the day she had been found by her adoptive father and pulled herself into the attic carefully stepping around her piles of books, pillows, and blankets and settling into the corner next to the window, where she could read in peace with the natural light illuminating her favorite fantasy book.

Her father always said these books were works of the devil, but Claudine loved them too much to care, she knew they were fake but they allowed her mind to wander to a place far from the isle of the lost.

She set the book on her lap and opened it, beginning to read.

Once there were four children whose names were Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy.

-one week after the new vks are transferred to Auradon-

Ben growled into his hand as he glared down at the new documents the council had presented to him. ‘we hereby overrule the vk transfer plan, it is rushed and unplanned, you bringing six villain children over with no security checks or going through their history on the isle will doom Auradon’

While he and (y/n) had figured out the council couldn’t change the rules of his first proclamation or straight up say no to it, they had forgotten if they got enough evidence or if the whole council agreed they could shut the program down.

Luckily Ben had been able to salvage the isles fresh food and necessities program as it had high security going in and out of the barrier and the Auradon guards personally handed out the shipments to make sure no one snuck anyone or anything back into the ship.

Only one person on the council had gone against the rest, ex-king Luis, Prince Charming’s father. He understood the need to continue to get innocent children off the isle and had adamantly refused to vote against it, and helped Ben salvage the fresh food program.

Ex-queen Leah had been the biggest voice against Ben, and he knew she had orchestrated the meeting and the others to cut off the transfer program, she was still angry at Ben for bringing over the daughter of the fae that had “ruined” her daughter's childhood and ruined her motherhood.

Luckily, Ben had found a loophole, he had shown them his plans for the CPS and shelter, where each vk would have an adult to be in charge of them and a place to stay away from the general population and the council agreed that he could continue the vk transfer plan.

But only once he had finished building both the CPS and the shelter, then they demanded that there would be a more thorough screening of the villain children. In the way of applications, they would give their name, parents' name, fingerprints, an essay about why they wanted to come to Auradon, and then a section for the villain children to tell them about their lives on the isle. And then the council would go through the applications and THEY would approve of who was allowed to come to Auradon, and then Ben could choose out of their approved applications

Ben was angry, very, very angry. All the progress that he made within the last two months, gone. Only a day ago he was able to just point at a vk and say ‘you’re coming to Auradon’ and it could happen, with hardly any mess, yes, he would have to get a guardian for them and then get them approved by the school board for a new student and then get the new vk approved to live in the dorms but, that was a lot fewer hoops to jump through then this new application bullshit which would take so much more time.

And he wouldn’t even be able to be the first person to look at the applications as an unbiased person, they would go through cooky old people who still held on to their grudges against these kids’ parents, and pass that grudge onto the kid who wasn’t even born during that time!

Ben threw down the file containing the new guidelines for the transfer plan and buried his face in his hands. The shelter alone would take almost a year to be fully refurbished to be able to comfortably house hundreds of kids that ranged from toddlers to barely adults, then the CPS?? There was so much more to that than on the surface, he had to hire people, make sure they were certified, give them a place to base out of, get them trained to be able to handle the kids off the isle who most of which were probably traumatized! Get therapists ready, medical staff, kitchen staff, living wages, and so much more that just made Ben's head hurt.

Who the fuck thought it was a good idea to make a sixteen-year-old a king? His own father wasn’t king until he was well past his teens, why did he think his kid would be ready for all of this so much earlier than he did?

Ben sighed, lifting his head and rubbing his eyes, this was all going to take over a year, at least, possibly two, maybe almost 3. so the vks would just sit there and wait until they in Auradon were ready to have them come.

Ben felt rage bubbling in his gut, he just wanted to say fuck it and continue doing it the way he was, except with more kids each round. He wanted to go to the isle and just scream at the top of his lungs ‘those who wish to live in Auradon follow me!’ and be able to give those kids the freedom they deserved.

Ben’s anger-filled thought stopped at the sound of slamming on his door. ‘(y/n)’ Ben thought, slightly nervous. He had sent a text to the group chat telling everyone about the council's interference and it was safe to say no one was happy.

Mal had never responded but he heard that there was a new hole in the dorm building wall (which she thankfully repaired but it didn’t stop her from being pissed and deciding to go out for a fly to burn off her anger), Evie had let off a wide range of curse words, some of which were definitely not English, Jay had sent a flurry of random letters and a small rant, Carlos had chucked his phone and was busy repairing it.

And (y/n), Harry, and Gil? Gil was understanding, knowing Ben had no part in it, but the other two? (y/n) had gone silent, and so had Harry.

That was never a good thing.

Ben stood and walked over to his door, dragging his feet slightly as he did. He unlocked it and quickly took a step back as the door swung open and he was greeted by (y/n) and Harry's pissed-off faces.

“So what's this I hear about a meddling council” (y/n) hissed, stepping into the room with Harry following her, closing the door with his foot, and locking it. Watching as (y/n) stormed over to Ben's desk and picked up the file. “How could you let them do this?! Do you know how long it been for those kids?! Eight months!! And now you are going to let them wait even longer!? Fuck that!” (y/n) crumbled the file in her hands and Ben gestured to it as he gave a pleading look to (y/n)

“That’s what I want to do (y/n), but I can’t! When they overrule me, I can't do anything about it! I’m sorry, but if we don’t go by their rules then we don’t get kids off the isle…I’m sorry.”

(y/n) shook her fist in his face again and turned, walking towards Harry and burying her face in his chest, he wrapped his arms around her and glared at Ben. The two stared at each other for a moment, waiting to see who spoke first. Ben took the first word “I really am sorry, I’ll try to get everything ready as soon as possible, but some of it is going to take almost two years, maybe almost three! especially the shelter and CPS agency, and the council required those to be done before we can even send out the applications”

Harry stared at Ben for a moment before looking down at (y/n) and pulling her tighter into him.

“Get it done beasty boy” Harry seemed to growl, his lip set in a slight snarl “And quick, if this takes longer than yeh say, you’ll be hanging from the mast” Ben nodded, stepping towards (y/n) slightly and taking the crumbled file from her hands.

“I'll hold you to that” Ben sighed, stepping back and setting the file on his desk “In fact I’ll remind you if it does…what are we going to do about those kids in the meantime?”

“We can't let them sit there in the dark.” (y/n) mumbled, pulling away from Harry's chest and looking towards Ben “You remember the last time we did that, with Uma? You said she thought Harry and Gil abandoned her. We can't let those kids think we are abandoning them again; we need to let them know we’re doing everything we can”

“And we will” Ben nodded, the fire igniting in his chest again as he realized not all hope was lost “Those kids will know that we aren’t abandoning them. Through a newscast or a radio, I don’t know, but we'll let them know”

You and Harry nodded at Ben, who nodded back. “We'll figure this out.” Ben walked around his desk and sat down, glaring at the file. “We won't let them down.”

-end of part 5-

 Part 5! and Uma can see into the future~!! also yep the council are dicks and prevent Ben from doing everything easily. also yep more vks! more to come about them in future parts! hope you enjoyed!

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#Descendents #descendants #disney descendants #harry hook x reader #harry hook #harry hook descendants #harry hook imagine #interlude #finale #shuffle playlist #rewrite

[silkylious]

Promise (Amajiki Tamaki x Fem!Reader)

Pairing: Amajiki Tamaki x Fem reader Warnings: Heavy angst, maybe okay ending if you squint Prompt: #23 “Do you promise?”

A/N: Thank you @tamasoft​ for the request! Im realllyyy sorry for the delay, this was supposed to be fluffy but my angsty ass was in my feelings so I rewrote it and this thing came out, sorry in advance but I hope you like it lmfao 

You’d known each other since you were little kids. You’d declared yourself his friend the second you saw him playing alone in the sand pit, molding worlds and picking them apart with the toy utensils. You ditched your place on the swings, enthusiastically making your way towards him. He’d been so lost in creating an imaginary blueprint for his next construction that he hadn’t noticed you self-righteously claiming the spot next to him as your own, disregarding any and all lectures your parents had given you about personal space. Tamaki didn’t notice your presence curiously looming over his shoulder until you voiced your inner inquiries.

“What are you doing?”

An embarrassingly startled sound was extracted from his throat, a flaming pink decorated his cheekbones, further saturating in shade when he whipped around to find your childishly inquisitive features a mere three inches away. You continued staring at him, silently awaiting his response with a couple quizzical blinks. He finally got the courage to meet your prodding gaze, his quivering lips parting to give you a stammered reply.

“M-Making a sandcastle,” The simple answer ignited a gleam in your irises. You took the liberty of making yourself at home and taking some of the little boy’s plastic tools (without his permission) to aid in building his sandy structure. The roles were switched, now he was the one observing you owlishly, brows pulled taut in confusion.

“W-What are you d-doing?”

“Helping you,” Your reply was preceded with bubbly giggles.

“Why?”

“‘Cause I’m your friend.” You’d said it like it was a universal truth, an indisputable fact. So much so, that he couldn’t find it in him to argue with you or question your motives. Frankly, Tamaki was giddy. You were his first friend after all, leaving a shy smile to tug at his thin lips. His chubby hand wrapped around a toy shovel to start bringing his dream castle to life with your help.

Since then it has always been you and him, with the addition of Mirio a bit later down the line. It was just the three of you, and that’s all that really mattered.

Your personalities were stark contrasts to each other, he was reserved and quiet; you were chaotic and loud. You balanced each other out in the best possible ways. You brought out the surprisingly fun and spontaneous side of Tamaki, pushing him time and time again high above cloud nine with your antics, while he kept you grounded in reality, an anchor to keep you rooted and rational when you needed it most.

Your attraction to him began in middle school. It was just an innocent little crush, a passing fad, you’d told yourself at the time. You refused to accept it as anything but that, pushing down your feelings in hopes of them vanishing. But all that did was further increase their intensity. The seeds of your schoolgirl crush eventually started budding, flourishing into a rosy infatuation, the petals of which withered in unrequited agony. No matter how hard you wished for some fairytale ending, where the childhood friends recognized their feelings for one another, you knew that wouldn’t happen. You were Tamaki’s first friend; you knew him best. And in the time spent with him, despite your augmenting love, he never reciprocated. Never showed a sign of interest, you were akin to a sister to him, he’d never see you in a romantic light. And you were aware of that, painfully so. But the lovesick part of you convinced you that there may be a possibility that he was just that dense, that there was still some slim chance of him sharing your feelings. And that’s what kept you from moving on. You were stuck between a rock and a hard place; his indifference to you romantically barred you from confessing (the fear of losing him didn’t help in the slightest), and the hope of a future with him denied you the freedom of moving on. Every time a petal withered to the ground, a new one sprouted. It was a vicious cycle, a paradox that ensured your muteness, ensured that Tamaki would be blissfully ignorant to the tyranny and sheer power he had over the pitter-pattering of your heart.

It wasn’t until the two of you enrolled in U.A. that your second-guessing was finally quelled.

“(n-name) can we t-talk for a minute?” The stutter, the flush overtaking his face, the way his eyes wouldn’t look up to meet your own – all of it was too much for your poor heartbeat. This wasn’t the same as when he’d get nervous in front of large crowds, no this was different. This was it. The moment you’d dreamed of since your middle school days. Steeling yourself amidst the prying eyes of your classmates with a resolute ‘sure,’ you let Tamaki lead the way from the common room up to him dorm. You could distinctly hear the pounding in your chest as his door clicked shut. With an inhale from your nose and an exhale from your mouth, you sat on his bed (like you usually did) and tried to calm your nerves.

“So… what did you want to talk about?”  

Tamaki mimicked your motions, taking a seat on his mattress. His elf-like ears drooped a bit, your mind overdosing on the cuteness of his shyness, though you forced yourself to focus. His dark hues flickered to yours for a second before faltering down to his lap, the pink on his cheeks amplifying into a gorgeous cherry color, partially curtained by his indigo bangs.

“I think that I-I umm…” His hesitancy had you leaning forward, quietly begging him to spit out the words you’d longed to hear. “I-I think that… th-that I l-like H-Hado-san!” He blurted out, the red pigment you’d consider cute in any other situation spreading down to his neck. “A-And I-I don’t know how to c-confess…” his pointer fingers pushed and pulled against one another. Your mind still in shock of this new information.

It wasn’t until the two of you enrolled into U.A. that your second-guessing was finally quelled, confirming what you’d already known for the start. That he held no ounce of romantic attraction to you in his system. The petals fell down one by one as his words sunk in, the once bright red of them that portrayed your passion wilted, contorted into a lifeless obsidian, leaving a tethered stem behind. All this time you’d been waiting for a cue, a sign, anything that would indicate the right moment to profess your unyielding adoration, only to be told, albeit indirectly, that there was never a right moment. Which you already knew yet couldn’t fully accept. You were awoken from your heartbroken stupor by his next words.

“I-I’m not sure if she l-likes me b-back a-and we’re both busy with school stuff s-so I don’t know if I…” His voice trembled into a mumbling mess, completely unintelligible to your ears. The way he was acting, talking, the fact that he approached you with this in the first place… you knew what that meant all too well, you were in the same boat as him after all. Your eyes softened sympathetically, more for yourself than him if you were being honest, the irony of this was as bittersweet as it could get. He trusted you enough to talk about his feelings for someone else, venting about the likelihood of her reciprocating, all while being unaware of the similar predicament you were in. He trusted you; he didn’t love you. That newly revealed truth broke you, but you wouldn’t let it show, for his sake, for your friendship’s sake. You cut his ramblings with a hand firmly placed on his shoulder, directing him to fully face you.

“Tamaki, do you love her?”

“W-Wha–” His face erupted with more color, if that was even humanly possible at this point.

“Do you love her?” You repeated, eyes glazing with an agonizing mix of melancholy and acceptance.

He timidly nodded his head, his hair bobbing out of the way in the process, and boy was his face a sight to see. Aside from the one hundred and one different shades of crimson that decorated his complexion from his clavicle all the way up to his hairline, the unignorable sparkle in his stare was so excruciatingly familiar (it felt like looking at a mirror of yourself) and so goddamn torturous all at once, because you were so fucking conscious that it wasn’t meant for you. You managed a weak smile, for his sake, you looped in your head.

“Then go for it, Tama. I think she’d be more than happy to be with you.” The spark behind his irises ignited into raging fires that threatened to burn you alive, it was so hard to watch. So difficult to sit there and observe him, so madly in love with someone that wasn’t you.

“You r-really think so?” Your answering hum was meek, but it was there nonetheless. You were sure words wouldn’t come out if you willed them to. You weren’t lying, you’d seen the precious, closed-eye grin that graced her face whenever they hung out together, she was your friend too and you couldn’t not take notice of the fleeting glances she sent his way. Both of them were such airheads that they didn’t recognize their feelings for each other, despite them being as clear as fucking day to any onlooker. You honestly would have thought it was adorable if your heart wasn’t severely compromised amongst this.

Later that week, Tamaki came knocking on your dorm room door with uncharacteristic enthusiasm, those three knocks already told you all you needed to know, but you weren’t prepared for the unbridled joy in his wobbly smile or the love filling his eyes to the brim, his pupils were practically morphed into heart shapes.

“She said yes!”

You smiled, soft and delicate. Tamaki couldn’t see the boiling regret in that smile, nor could he see the wretched dejection in your eyes. You pulled him in your embrace, which he awkwardly returned.

“I’m so happy for you.” And you really were. Despite the crushing rejection loitering in every crevice in your mind, you really were glad he found someone he loved and who loved him back. You were sure Nejire would treat him right, and that’s all that really mattered to you. So long as he was happy, you were too; it just sucked that you weren’t the source of his fervent elation. As you laid your head on his shoulder, arms still wrapped around his torso, a very particular memory decided to pop back in your head.

It was three weeks after you’d first met, both of you playing at your usual spot in the sand pit, bending reality with your chubby hands together. You were close to finishing your latest sandy masterpiece when, in an atypical show of determination, Tamaki’s soft voice broke the comfortable silence.

“Do you promise, (n-name)?” You looked up from your creation with childish wonder swirling in your wide eyes.

“Promise what, Tama?”

“To be my best friend f-forever…” His previous vigour dwindled as he shakily lifted his pinkie up. You practically beamed from his words, excitedly wrapping your own little finger around his and clutching it tightly until both your knuckles went white, the toothy smile you gave him was damn near blinding, wide and pure as they come. He let out his own soft smile, pushing his thumb to yours and sealing the promise you both had made. And you shared a hug, your head lying peacefully on his shoulder, giggling at the awkward way he hugged you back.

As the little reverie came to an end, you mentally mauled over the significance of such simple, immature words. Tamaki probably didn’t even remember the promise to be frank, and neither did you until you had this feeling of Déjà vu. With your expression still out of his sight, you took the chance to let a lone tear slip. This is where you let go, where you began working on moving on. If there was one good thing to come out of this, it’s that you were finally free from the shackles of indefinite (false) hope that had held you hostage for years now, you finally had the freedom to let him slip between your fingers. And as much as you didn’t want that to happen, you knew it had to be done and you finally gained the ability to take the first step. He didn’t need you as a lover, he needed you as a friend.

Tamaki had always looked out for you, always made good on his promise.

Now it was your turn to do so too.

#tamaki amajiki x reader #amajiki tamaki x reader #amajiki x reader #tamaki x reader #amajiki tamaki #tamaki amakiji #awkward amajiki #tamaki amajiki imagine #100 followers event

[la-mise-en-abime]

my heart yearns for you, i never wanted to be comic, i always thought it would be better to be funny in real life and not have to muster it and waste it on stage, and have people be surprised when you weren't as funny in real life, i always found that dissapointing when it happened to me, like that person was an apparition of themselves an empty shell. And wow I've come to realise how sad this existence is, or maybe its just the pattern of believing in your self, there are certainly dips. my heart yearns for you and i think fuck, was i supposed to have gone with you, was i supposed to have been all these things, what if we’d never met. I hope I can separate myself from you and form my own being, we were growing together and were not growing apart yet but maybe i need a change. This year has been weird, so wonderful, and so weird, and now maybe i am feeling the repercussions of your change, i am really feeling what you are feeling as one amoeba, we obviously share a bladder that has been said before so the urinary tract is suffering, but it hurts to feel your mundainity, it hurts to see you in your ordinary pain, your extraordinary pain in your ordinary life, it hurts me to think maybe you are not special, you are not just a special magical spelll that has reeked havoc on my life and make me question what holes i want it in. You are special, but if the world doesn’t notice so and treats you like shit i wont stand by it, ill stand with you, im sure what else I can do, will do. I dont want them spreading. our message so falsely for their own gain, i dont want coffee drunk over us and laughed over us, at our expense and sexual fetishes and smiles and dimples and rude finger gestures and shrugs and pleas and questions and examinations and cuts and bruises and cuts and no questions and spit in your face. Id rather not that thank you, id really rather not. I dont care what i am, just in relation to you always in relation to you. omg the fucking car alarm wont shut the fuck up, please shut the fuck up screaming like a fucking attention seeking cunt shut up, thank you. I was scared they would rape you, im still scared they will rape you, and i dont wants o be subtle anymore, I m scared they will fist you and put things inside you and pull your trousers down and laugh and bend you over a car and fuck you and fuck you hard, and im scared i want that, no i dont but I can imagine it vividly, has it happened somewhere in my memory before. I remember crying very hard over that film boys dont cry in tigers arms, sobbing and gasping like when i used to have tantrums, once a huge one in a video store andi couldn’t breathe i was crying so hard, and my dad said, T everyone can hear you, look they're all looking at you, take a deep breath and bap bap bap like fish inhale all that air and exhale very slowly, (later he said so your mouth looks like an asshole) but fuck those people that were looking at me he just shouldnt have made me fucking cry and it felt good and distressing to cry that much.

when we first met, the first night i called you she so many times when i was talking about you to other people, i had to keep correcting myself like i had terrets or something (that fucking car alarm) she, he, she, he, she, he. You didn't realise you have subsequently told me, but i rememeder it clearly, i was so drunk I could nt get it right, and you were the first trans person i had met knowingly, when you first told me you joked it about it, that seemed to be your method at the time, haha yeah, im basically just becoming a teenager, im about 13 in T years, i was like who is this creature who is telling me this there was subtle tone of vulnerability in how you explained it as if to say please accept this floating skin of myself that rests just above our heads, any sudden movements will frighten it off and i complied with this thing in front of me, kept it floating warily above our heads, as i fell in love with you. but your smile was golden, you were soft like the butches i had seen before, that negative space you *cant couldn’t touch where femininity and masculinity come close but don’t touch. the softness of fat under you shirt and the way you sweat and knowing there was something vulnerable in your pants, something I knew so much of and also nothing. this was stepping into another realm. I felt almost ashamed as if i was leading you on and you were so shiny and soft I knew you wanted more, but i was scared of you. i think i was terrified. of what you represented.

i was so scared of getting it wrong I did the most research ever before i met you again. how to give a clit orgasm , trans porn, top surgery, bottom surgery, fucking buzz feed all to find you somewhere, but you weren't there, you were new born, fresh into this world, thats why it felt like a lie, its affects creep up on you and for a long time you are lying to the world and proving it and i knew so much yet i would blow on your skin and, nothing. as i see you then you were more of a man than ever so pushed into a box, as so much of it is, to parade something you cant even have the grasp of to explain, to someone, your grounding on this earth in a matter of facial muscles and sounds originating from the mouth and lines and lumps in the right place flattened down that could have restricted your breathing as we slept and i said how lovely your back was because you wouldnt take it off you. Wouldn't let me see you like that it could have killed you in your sleep left me kissing a dead back i cant I cant. So for a while I could have been your fairy. your keeper even your comforter i did not exist because you did not hold me back, give yourself to me and**** i asked you in the dark of night do you like being licked out, do you like getting oral sex, do you use dildos, where do you not want me to touch, i thought you didn't want me to put my mouth there because it was wrong, it was weird, overgrown stump of what a pearl was, oh how i was wrong and you loved it and i too, i thought you might want me to suck on that appendage that innocent bystander that plastic thing that was never asked if it wanted to go in the dark place alone with no light, want me to lick it and suck it and look up at you while i did it like in the films, cause i would have done anything to get you off, and i did, but you let me put the overgrown pearl in my mouth let me pull it and suck it and let it rithe in my mouth furry stubborn pearl rolling on the sea bed, under bed under my tongue it would grow and wither and chip into my head visions of another world where I had never been and we would have to take an underground river to get to.

i remember the night it happened in that small space we called a bed the squeaked and the heating sounded like it was having a hight pitched breakdown, i was going to party that was prom themed and dressed up with lipstick over my top lip and all around my mouth and a wig and a dress and the whole time i was getting ready i was thinking of it happening, i was terrified i was going to get it wrong, id never done it, what if i would never get it right cause it wasn't the right genital substance for me, what if it was embaressing and i would have to go home with my tail between my legs not a true lesbian, straight person, person of lesbian tendencies, individual or something, someone that could not give another person what they both wanted to be given. i dont know I really didn't know, all I knew was that i looked fucking brilliant, and no one else was dressed up as per usual, so fuck them, and it gave me that sense of brilliance that everyone is judging you and you dont care.

and now they tell me a changeling is an old fairy that takes the place of a human baby an old stubborn baby that clings onto life promising its youth to all those around it that makes more sense when i call you a changeling when i call you a changeling that has been swapped at birth if only you didn't have a belly button or you had two sets of eye lids, or a second skin, but you do have strange belly button piercing from another life well say its an alien marking it i like putting my finger in it so hairy and soft and i get stapled in the mind when i know you were a teenage girl, and it turns me on and it scares me you will see that in my eyes. it makes sense that the old fairy would have seen the land and its folds to have a sense of knowing the cradle is where it should reside for the rest of its days not shuffle along in the mud with fairy toes all wet. you told me to put my toes in the sand, it felt so wrong and like they were being licked that time, in Edinburgh, a large man in an animal state licked my toes and it felt so good i let go of everything, but it comes so natural to you , to look at the sea and see answers, im almost playing to your state so you feel more comfortable in your natural environment if i am repulsed. the way people do that sometimes in order to appease the other, was it unnatural for me not to be amazed, you do annoy me when you are that pure(goldstar). i look as if i have corrupted you from your chosen path, perhaps you will go back there someday, back to the beach and think of me and you'll be at home cause i wont be teasing you, you'll be done with London and its cruel ways to spit you out with all your teeth and dreams, ill sit up in my high castle and be cold because of the drafts, without my human blanket.  my cold winter feet.

and i want to have your children as long as they are fizzy and rough and have no part in the world they will become hardened to. i want there to be a way, a way that men with answers will give them to us and let me stop googling humiliating shit like can two eggs make a embryo, this is the age of fake news and i dont want to be a fucking victim. (of it) I want the soft place between us soft shell air socket between us to be full with potential and not lacking in our minds because of what ever we've been told needs to be there to build a life. i want it when i rub on the top of your clit, tiny boner, source, of rivers, slowly when you sit on me to really be you inside me or you transporting something in the air to me you don’t have to be inside me i am clever enough, imaginative enough to receive a wish of will. this way is better is better it is this way is better and better for me to lay my body on the sidewalk and shout for it to be this way ill disgrace myself to hold your hand.

its funny the words we use to communicate to each other i call you bitch and slag and squeal at you in the morning i shout in a mad face that the bombs are coming get down the bombs are coming and i tickle you and hit you when you dont hide your face into the cover, i like the helpless tickling noise, your gasping for air and your fucking smile is so framed in everything i could ever ask for. I think im like my dad like that when he screams little baby bird baby bird and picks you up like a child with the body of a huge 50 year old henry the 8th look a like. i dont want anyones approval but it hurts to know some soft states cant be translated into other states some things cant be grasped or explained.

we like to scream bitch after saying things because its like the cartoon rick and morty character who is the nightmare man, that was what got me through the break up and you lay on my lap as we watched, and i sunk my sad claws into that screen hoping the half an hour episodes would sink into one another and back into the whites of my eyes into my brain i could see us watching but i couldn't feel it, but the feeling was slowly coming back like after you burn your fingers with ice cream.

/

im sorry if you are hurt I had to do it i needed to be selfish well all die alone theres nothing more to say i couldn’t put it into words, i am scared of what is coming of the eyes of others im scared I will blame you for what i have doubts. you let me take you there i feel like the guy, there is no guy and I am becoming more comfortable in this position against your skin you can tell when people have copy and pasted ideas im self conscious of your knowing of my lust of your knowing of my want to penetrate you im conscious of my eagerness to do this and im conscious of what this could mean and could not. Im conscious of your body next to mine in the dark room im concious of the splinter in my finger im conscious i must be with out you. Im conscious of my memories past and how they build this encounter how i must hold back things from your view and bring others into the light but they are all there waiting to be shown it is for me to divide(decide). i am concious of you in the dark room when I see the man cry at the sound of a lovers voice from years past i feel the weight of his pain and i cry infant(infront) of you in the dark room full of people, they dont know this they dont understand like i have and i come out the cinema see the shadows of people in my way did they see what i saw i could not believe they were they they do not feel the same they are frauds, I make a swift exit to the toilet so as not to be taunted by these shadows, what is this face i see on leaving the huge and empty lonely *discabled toilet we blush at each other we know who the other is and cannot express the name of the other our mouths are forming round the name both struggling to admit this is happening(the other has a name) both blushing both full with what is delirium from all the crying shed in the dark room the evil son dark species feeder comes out the * bathroom to greet us he too is bleeding red blush and eyes and nose do twist and curve into some uncomfortable shape to fu/fill the space where words should be, and none of us can detect any.

you ask me how i did it. and i think of their mouths on each others genitals for a flash second as they stand close enough to kiss and i think better put that to bed my love. you ask me what did i do. She's taller than I thought im a fucking child a well mannered fucking child the fact my face has been near a dick makes you want to slit my throat, but i cut my tongue off and gave it to you for christmas. i say i sucked my fingers and put them places, and all i want to do is feel and to be shown the different avenues of experience. Im sorry i made that gesture people did it at uni those cuts across the arm in the air a razor blade wiped clean every time wrapped up and hidden in a draw like a battle field my love like a war torn landscape. i fucking hate those people i dont know i could strangle them for their inanety for their very wretched existence on this planet.

of the splinter in my finger at close glance microscopic slow motion as a pick it from my finger and its still sore is there still something in there i will never get out i will always copy in my actions to others be a wooden

fuck the egg fuck the egg fuck the egg and they were all so strange and i was so strange in their company as i am in the meetings of strangers it it where i find myself i find myself there it is my true self when i making things up and there is an atmosphere not yet made but worth polluting and his mother was dying and he saw a drag queen make an omelette and i made my excuses from my lack of anything and you were on a chopping board waiting to be chopped and i was in the hill in the suburb of my mind in my fear of the rape of the suburb and my filming of the fish in the shop window in the night of the suburb* and my mothers words were strong and definite this is something that will affect you and you are lost i am lost lost lost i know it was a losing game to say it was what i could handle was funny and I was laughing as i tried

filming things to take back to you of my existence the evidence of my existence and the world that you could not see. parcels of light

so poorly filmed camera angles all blushing with love

Id love to have been there in that moment, frying pan on the go, quite allot of fat, like chicken breast, must be nice to eat feed someone something from your own body. penis

im sorry i was full when you wanted to fuck me. Tomorrow we are going to dinner with your family, i will have to behave like i have to, no hands under the table touching you as we eat, it will be hot, suffocatingly hot and ill have to concentrate on what i am eating not eating you

did i hurt you did i make you bleed? i wish id recorded our conversation, and ill have to read this book again and again as its urgency describes the urgency for us to be described. You said it made you open that those boundaries were closed for so long, you've been alive for a long time, no ones ever been in there no person or thing, you must really like me, for letting you do that, my bodies like what are you doing things dont go in there only come out, whats that we like it, oh i suppose we should give it a try. its not something i can describe yet this feeling of you opening up to me, i knew all along you would like it. it makes me drowsy watching you getting turned on suffocating under my hand, you want it and im going give it to you im gonna take it away and put it back in , im touching you where you've never been touched it might as well not existed you didn't exist before this moment soft in my hand and wriggling in my fist, im holding you there i wont let you go ill give you everything you want to get there ***im deep inside you i can feel your pain that something has expanded and been washed away with the penetration and skin on skin that soft place between your hip and lower thigh that could still be a babies limb(thigh) that night i spoke to a butch about being a bottom and she told me sex is just looking at someone just imagining things are there that aren’t and everyone gets fucked in every hole and space that wants it when you have not spent your life in the corners of others peoples eyes ducking from sight and fucking, would you have put things inside yourself when you were younger did you just bleed and then stop and then bleed and then stop did your blood stain the sheets did you feel like a hole like an opening to be spread across the floor and sucked from someones fingers(in a jar), to be spread across the floor, did your dad smile at you and tell you not to have seconds did he have seconds is he an asshole does he think about your vagina swelling as it does with the months of injecting vials  T /of pleasure/ straight to the blood supply supplying an ever growing (cock) clitoris, you said id fucked you into a coma, i want you to sleep in my lap all day, you cried and my hands were wet when i put them on your face, your got my cheeks wet you fucker (asshole) i was saving them for a rainy day, you said you lived on one floor you said 2 women lived in your house that were sisters and never spoke did your blood stain the walls did your blood stain the walls can i eat it can i lick it from your wounds when we fuck with the jock strap on and its covered in blood it makes me think of your blood and if there was a gash between your legs a severing you apart if you will fall apart and break in half and stain the floor as i drag you across the room , can i lick it from your wounds your soft and gutteral wounds so soft like petal flesh someones cut them and theyre bleeding from your plastic appendage theres blood on your clit but im sucking it, still blood there.,wont let me inside cause of the invisible blood there, it will be there for a while trickling down, the war on your body, the thighs of a child, i touched you in a place you hadn't heard of hadn’t translated into the language coudlnt understand the cuts dont like holes skin didn't prick pickle, ulcerus skin would let anything in barriers up it hurt me when i wasn't allowed in felt like heteronormativity without the pain of boredom but a line not to be crossed but things not to be stroked or kissed or licked let me hold you in the night now I've held you and broken you and something floats inside me if only they were to know, could you be pregnant with my wanting ?

have you been spending allot of time with your parents because you know they are going to die soon, i am lonely, i need to spend more time alone, it makes you more lonely when you cant remember the last time you were alone i really would’nt know who i was if i got married now.

i like fucking you in the ass, it really gets me off, really gets me off, really turns me on really makes me want to be inside you inside your whole core cant

i am dancing in slow motion to your voice, i am filming myself dancing in slow motion to your voice, i am cutting something up while listening to your voice, i running round in circles listening to your voice, i am on the floor crying listening to your voice, i am holding myself tightly listening to your voice, I am shouting over the sound of your voice trying to make myself louder, i am hungry for you voice, i am ashamed by the space between us, i am hungry for your voice, I am holding a floor/flower for your voice, i am listening to your voice drunk with my fingers in my ears, i am drinking shots to the sound of music timed listening to your voice,- man be cool i am frying an omelette listening to your voice, i am feeling everything listening to your voice, i am feeding an audience member listening to your voice, i am surprised by myself listening to your voice, i am masc for maSCC listening to your voice, i am hoping you wont leave listening to your voice, i am wanting to throw things away listening to your voice, i haven't decided listening to your voice, i am miming along listening to your voice, i am copying you listening to your voice, i am speaking very slowly listening to your voice, i am oily listening to your voice

a happy accident might be to faint on the tube and on coming round see your face, i find there is a null space between writing of words and the performance it is to panic that one is not right that one is not enough to parallel the other, to say that what comes first what is the purpose of the speaking, how much effort should the speaking be to counteract the writing, did the writing come from an improv, how does one improv on their own, I will just have to talk to myself for the rest of my life, no the improv comes from an exercisee, starting small and fun and exploring it, not know or worrying as to where it might go, the same with writing, do you start with a goal in mind, well sometimes you have an objective but you go on a journey to get there and no decision is wrong just a manifestation from your head, nothing you could ever do if it was honest would be wrong honesty is the best policy but that doesnt mean you cant be honest and also be deceitful, be lying and be honest, be lying honestly, be copying honestly, it is a mixture of lies and truth this is performance, to use ones body as the bericle to which you tell the story or the thoughts from your brain just your very existence not he stage is radical enough, to even say one word or blink would be radical enough…

i am sad i think my father is lonely i cant see him now but can here his soft rummaging and weird noises down stairs he can scream like a mad man and is always performing his mad man routine which might infact be his personality, but like me he is just pushing the boundaries and likes to piss people off and make them feel uncomfortable, so it is sometimes hard to tell the difference, I am sad he is lonely because i cannot see him but i can hear him coughing now, and in the night, i can hear him snoring through the floor boards and i can see the snor s coming up through the air like fluffy grey clouds or waves, i am sad that he is lonely i cannot see him but i can see a dark blue space punctured with lights and that is what downstairs looks like until i go downstairs and i can see its real walls and light fixtures and i know this is the real corners not the dark corners, i think he is lonely as he asked me to go to the corner shop to get him a beer a Stella Artois and I am sad because i did not get it for him and now he is coughing he is in the sarcoughaus of the house he is under my feet i feel i am selfish i only speak to him when i want things i wish adults weren't so useless and they could tell you what was wrong like a plant or a shoal of tuna feels like stabbing in the dark into a shoal of fish trying to understand him

when I woke up i thought about your genitals how they might be wet on my face, i turned over and felt my body on the mattress, I thought had you ever done this, you never touched it when you wanked, you still dont unless you with me and were in the moment. i had a pervading fear you might leave me for another man, I watched men from your eyes, seeing them as unconquered land as something you had not tried never been touched by a man in all your years, apart from that hand job with your guitar teacher, i thought i hate that woman, i woke from a sleep of her me telling you couldn't watch it, it angered me too much, i couldn’t watch it was sickening and her fucking face i could cut it open

Soft wet thing doesnt make sense pear shaped blossom and soot covering the sides urinal polished unforgetting is it to touch another in your future, basin of doubt my mouth alludes me it goes to what has come before

(without sentence structure just using simile and metaphors and free writing compairison to do this )

I had another dream about someone else, i feel dirty im gonna have a shower, im scared your gonna change im scared your gonna leave me for another man, im scared of you have a life without me, i keep having dreams about her, every night, do i want to fuck her or am i taunted by her, im taunted by her by a past life of mine, she came to greet me and she had candy floss hair i looked a mess everyone was there and we went out and left everyone i just left for her pleasure

i get paid to be sensitive in the sensitive spot the wind touches my ankles and there nothing to do in the plain sight the pain sigh the plain sight that moves me i woke up with blurry vision am i going blind, i woke up and what i could see yesterday i can no longer see before i feels good to hold your self down to be fLat and shiny and full of a heart and skin and blood underneath to know a cut would open you up so easily to fail in the dirt failing to use your limbs to fall bewildered to go outside for once in your life have you been outside today have you have been outside today no so dont hurt me again with your stale cavity

you would growl at the man in the shop selling us peaches didn't know he had a tremor terret,s to growl not ideal for a corner shop being the only light in a dark world dark street moon time peach buying and it upset me and i thought of myself as a small child all small and childlikee as a small child when kids took it too far and you shrivelled up into your self, its when your alone with your pain, snowball in the eye water dripping from you eye in alone with myself for hours, all hazy in the background, background noise, sharp aliveness alive sadness with he dirty snow dripping from my eye or glass that i sat on, the worst would be to be maimed she said , to be maimed  would be the worst, to be maimed she said would be the worst, it was only a peach pit in my skull, but you wouldn’t want a 12 inch knife in your stomach sternum would you no you wouldn’t, a peach pit stone cutting the sides of your head off, shaving an inch from yours skull, its skill to laugh again after the impact, i felt child child again, plight of the hill and the peach pit in my brain it sunk in made its self known to me, known that it would not venture out, somewhere else a man was being cut open, known to me it would not venture out, it would not venture out and to expect something of the thing before it reaches its thing hood is foolish to expect something fo the thing is foolish, is foolish when a peach pit has embedded itself into its skull sorry to be a senstitve being, sentiive in the cool of the night air, as we cross the road to avoid cars we think might kill us, where everything is the height of the wind as the rain is about to fall, as temperaturee falls, it stayed with us all night, that stone worked its way out (but that stone did not work its way out)

shouting from a place of honesty, to unravel it would take its secrets away, it was a sigh in the mind, it was my sweat on your forehead, it was something happening far away, it was that peach pit of cruelty

why did i keep eating them bending lower and lower to my fait. my knees are the first to go, too weak for what they will

its when your alone with your pain, glass in my upper thigh near the places you choose to be cut open, involuntarily penetrated and loneliness is death and i have a scar there and its when your alone with your pain

, an men described as mediateranine colouring what ever the fuck that means hindered bodies with

i am so angry at you i am gone with anger I am gone i could have made the thing and blasted it into your face i could have made the thing and blasted it into your face watever you fucking cunt go lick the dogs arse i hate you and your fucking cuffling laugh and the way you look at me when you disapprove maybe i need to be more accepting thats my fault but i could hit you right you you fucking sucker go lick the dogs arse shut up ill say goodbye and not kiss you how do you like that if only it didn't fold back on me you /dont know me at all you are fitting things into the past what you used to say what you used to think you dont actually think that anymore dont let the shit they say grind you down thats a cliche go lick the dogs arse I am full with so many voices and none of them are yours  you sucker go lick the dogs arse the words you say are empty vaccums i do things for you im self entitled i want to get it wrong i do things for you im self entitled i want to get it wrong i want to be excited instead im scared i want to get it wrong go lick the dogs arse

i couldn't hate you for long, but did you hate me forever, soaking up my life, is this sharing is this toll sharing, does it hurt you too,

it comes from the soul

wind hots the window suds like a bee dying

duality of eggs and blood

Bred into my womb

to find the details and tell your story

a film from my perspective as a stalker to you

hey fossil fuel, dirty ribena, slime mould, sea potato, Ursula le Guin, get in my mouth please peasant testicle tentacle put you to sleep eat you to your heart, peace be with you, bible passage for your grandma, Eccles cake for you pegging, naked with a cap on, dim light of the room a memory not to be forggoten and then i devoured you and then i devoured you and then i devoured you and then i devoured you cherry pip cherry core cherry cherry sticks and cherry more. Lychees at the cinema a hidden satsuma grapefruit lips fruit is expensive

im worried my dad only exists in my kitchen

im proud that you told them there is something else a Zara sales assistant wouldnt get it you were trying to tell her there was a void in the floor that she could fall into this gaping hole sucking the air out the room just a dash from razor on someones face wouldnt tell it to them straight give them enough warning of their ignorance there was a hurricane a whirlwind approaching she better get her fucking brolly - probably sum it up in one sentence.

into a massive void that was shaking all the

in those slow motion moments under the lights as the corners of your body touched mine tacky red paint and screaming

in that surreal slow motion

the less im with you the more I hate you for not sugaring my existence

Iit will all pass so grab it now

it was your gold star!!

my hands smell like celeriac but this morning they smell of your scent from inside your thighs where the humming birds sing, where i laugh at our fathers for not knowing we have that scent on our fingers as we talk to them

Ilike that man who kept getting ups nd putting his hat back on

when your full with cum and adrenalin you cant feel the pain

the metaphors the rising cultures

i am funny and you are funny and in the end i think its all going to be okay

to make a real effort to smile and not put my hands under the table.

the smell of cigarettes Monday morning

do they mix the ashes and dead bodies with the food

seeing that fruit stall and thinking that was where you were mine but i was not yours

i was your baby and i used to suck your chin

Never yours

Theres a man bow legged and he's walking, did his mum know not to wrap him round her chest like that so his legs would grow in the shape of her love and rib cage

the ground is lavender, looks like lichen, bluebells maybe just floating above the grass, a hat, a bonnet of flowers

i pass blisets where the man speaks in burps

throat cancer has made him funny without realizing

we walk along and our our knees in the right place?

we use sticks, we use plastic wheeled things, i am late, we use stealth, accents and alter egos, i channeled into a man selling big issue suddenly i am Liverpudlian so he recognises me as his own and forgives me for no money

she grows it but it looks better short

im late and bins line the pavement

i woke up in shock this morning and apologised in my sleep

Reeds

they will cut it off soon

film haircut march poem pics love

funny watch

even though can is hilarious

i fancy people who look like they've been found under a rock.

i rip my hair our its pieces

i am holding back

from every circle of my life

shame theres no poppies just unruly black hairs vying for attention

my love

not in our forehead or fingers

it is your ex girl friend

in awe of all the others creatures

i saw a bird with a ketchup packet

to call to each other reference each other tell each other things that are subconscious or just things. I call you bitch, the source, trans jelly, lichen, kitten , chicken tikka masala, midlands, it goes on. Im a rabbit in your keeping your your so small, smaller than me.

i hear you are on quest is that true? and you were born this morning, how is the world treating you? Im going to tell you some truths about the world.. have you learnt about hot and cold yet? Christmas trees have very short lives, sometimes the sun shines too much and you go red, you like icecream, you also like the beach and walking with your shoes off, you really like steak, cartoons and you are very kind.

the reason i cant really talk very clearly is because i have cut my tongue out and given it to you as a present.

I cut your tongue off and gave it to you for christmas.

ill cut an old woman face off and lay it in mine and scream like a goddess in battle as we sit on the tube cutting a mans head off with the slight of a blink in my fantasy that could be real if you will it.

if i had a 3d printer

i take you and i raise you to the highest peaks, dont bring us down.

and not spunk.

Middle ages people with their politics and booze that nor really fair i like them allot and they've livedI

as we have discovered a whole new worl

it feels great cause you know they are just particles of nothing and every part of your face is ——-gleaming.

boat to under the river where snails .

and ill nev

left me with a mound of flesh

for moths to come

my truth, my witty ex

Transface

Political nipples

Squirm

Beetle juice

Metamorphic

your such a tease

Tardigrade